#i have work tomorrow im going to bed
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the duality of man
#just blahs#my art#most people only ever see the second one#and thats usually the way i draw myself#however.#if you catch me unawares before noon you will see the first one because that is how i look in the mornings#i am a long haired kitten whos fur got pushed the wrong way untill noon when i gain consciousness and clean myself up#anyways#i have work tomorrow im going to bed
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I’m so sick of thissss I feel like I just can’t find colors that I like and I keep procrastinating from working on this cause I’m so not enjoying it
#wip#I’m tired of this grandpa let me go to bed#the first one is so fucking bad I need to be shot#problem is like the concept so much I can’t let this go… and he looks so cutes in the sketch#ok i fixed the black and white version at least maybe ill want to kms less tomoroww#worst thing is i wont have a lot of time to work on this tomorrow either but im eepy noooooo
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Self insert introduction time!
Meet Canary, my self insert for Rainbow Six Siege.
Gender: Female (cis)
Name: Nico Blackburn
Callsign: Canary
Pronouns: she/her
Orientation: Bisexual
Height: 5'4"
Birthplace: Georgia, USA
Born September 18th, 1999, Canary is the newest recruit to Rainbow as a young and mischievous defender with a passion for storytelling and a lighthearted demeanor. She's easygoing and thoughtful, a calm presence under most circumstances. Her laid-back personality belies a fondness of mischief and fun that falls in line with her sarcastic sense of humor. Her jokes are usually delivered with a dry tone, making it hard to tell when she's joking and when she's not. She enjoys the guessing game quite a bit.
Playlist: Canary and the Coalmine (ongoing project)
While she is a good-natured troublemaker, Canary is quick on her feet and an exceptionally fast learner, allowing her to adapt quickly in chaotic situations. She's also genuinely kind and understanding towards others, which is a double edged sword in her line of work. The young operator has a deep fondness for animals, particularly bugs, reptiles, rodents, and especially birds. She also likes to pick up new skills and hobbies, often asking other members of the team about their hobbies, interests, and crafts. Her curiosity seems limitless and genuine, and has allowed her to bond with operators who are otherwise known to be rather closed off.
Backstory coming soon! (I'm working on it ;w;)
Voicelines:
General & Prep Phase Lines:
"Y’all hear that? That’s the sound of bad decisions."
"Hope they’re smarter than they look. Actually—nah, I don't want to get my hopes up."
"Let’s make some noise. Or better yet, let’s make 'em think they’re hearin’ things.”
"Who've you got money on? Us or them?"
"Y'all don't do anything stupid, now. That's my job."
Gadget Deployment:
"Hope they weren't sayin' anything important."
"Y'all like surprises? Here's one."
"Come again? Didn't quite catch that."
Winning a Round:
"What'd I say? Bad decisions."
"Bless your heart. Is that all you've got?"
"How'd ya like the music?"
"Well, that's that. Who's buying drinks?"
Losing a Round:
"Well that's awfully inconvenient."
"Alright, that one's on me. Won't happen again."
"I guess you'd call that a lesson, huh?"
Taglist: @tex-treasures, @voidselfshipp
Ref by doodles_i_guess on TikTok
#im tired can i go to bed now#s/i: canary#self ship#selfship#self insert#fictional other#art by nico#i wanted to add shading but its midnight my time and i have work tomorrow#rip my sleep schedule#self shipping#s/i#tw eye contact
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Repeatedly chanting "I don't want to, but I can, and I'm going to."
#i have p severe phone anxiety esp about things I'm already anxious about and esp esp when i know it will be hard to hear/understand#BUT#i am going to call to work on the dental insurance issue#i have a cracked tooth and i am going to be responsible about it!!#tomorrow is the day I've scheduled for this and I'm getting ready for bed so that's why it's on my mind#i don't want to but i CAN and im GOING TO!!!!#updates on my boring life
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sketched a scene for what im imagining dams3l to include in my brain. what if you wanted her to have an opinion of her own So Badly that she got so angry at you that she just left and locked you in the basement. would that be fucked up or what
#slay the princess#stp the damsel#✒️#👑#i didnt make a design for her bc im going to bed soon bc i have work tomorrow 😢 but yeah#the stubborn would be the voice added btw and he would get So fucking excited when she leaves you in the cabin#the deconstruction
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shoutout to people working their dream jobs doing something mundane
#i work in IT and can i be honest. i might complain about my work sometimes but ive never#gone to bed and been like ''man i dont want to go to work tomorrow''#or like. i have had thoughts similar to that but it's always because of something non work related#like rn im excited to go to work and see my co workers tomorrow morning#but also i wish i didnt have work so i could wake up to play monhun#or sometimes i wish i could just sleep in. but i never hate my job#i enjoy going there. i can make a living with it. actually as soon as i graduate i'll be earning pretty well#though most of that will be going to student loans for some years but it's still more than what my parents made combined when i was a kid#pre taxes for both of us. not taking inflation into account.#i know i complain about management and complain at work but i genuinely really like my job#its always been my dream to have a job i dont mind doing. and this is it.#im not saying id feel the same in any it job. but here i get to manage like a billion different systems and device types#and i get to do so much different things and theres always something new and fun going on and i get to be a part of making it happen#and its a very seasonal job so im not doing the same thing all around the year. spring is the busiest but i fucking love spring#both in general and at work#days go by fast bc theyre busy but theyre busy in like ah. how do i say it. in a way i dont have high brain power work#sure i need to know my shit but its easy shit#and then winter is always projects and v much using my brain and less my body#spring and summer some work days are workouts gdvxhdns#also during some weeks in the summer. i can go on a walk anytime and get ice cream or something on the clock#and using the excuse of saying im patroling our systems gdvxhsj#theres a lot to do but the work environment is chill#a lot of IT work is. sure paying way more but also complete hell. not for me.#what im doing rn is like. i would not mind retiring here.#im not surprised lots of ppl do like 40 year careers where i work#sure managements been kinda shit but things are changing rn#and i feel like theyre changing for the better#idk im just v happy rn!#spring is coming and i can feel it#i love spring theres so much new things happening
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ok fine motherfucker ill listen to your damn song again
#ramblings#i love live blogging about having silly billy stuck in my head. thanks ochre im now off the brainrot deep-end /lh /silly#ive been given a blorbo against my will what the fuck do i do. pico didnt haunt me bc i invited him in here willingly#<- actually very fucking funny knowing my first reaction to this fixation and specifically fixating on pico#was do doodle me holding a lighter to him like the `oh hi mr frog . youre not supposed to be here` meme#im gonna. lay down in the dark while i do so. im tired as shit#<- makes sense since its nearly 10pm but its frustrating bc i got work tomorrow afternoon#so i dont wanna go to bed yettttnjgnfjnjkfngf i want to stay in my free day for as long as possible#even tho i dont have to leave until 4:20
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will any1 hate me if i postpone burgers
#im so tired n schedule changed and now i actually have to go to work AGAIN tomorrow.... Sickening. diabolical#im dnot up for drawing right now#i want 2 go to bed
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for anyone who dislikes miscommunication in any form i have the perfect show for you it's called vice versa the series and the main characters actually communicate so much that people complained about every issue getting solved in the same episode in this essay i will— [gets sniped out of existence]
#okay im feeling so deeply annoying rn and i also have work tomorrow so im shutting up and going to bed#to delete
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my brain is consistently fogged and i dont like it
#txt#i havent called my parents this week and i know my mom will be upset and i literally have no reason other than#sorry i felt like im not real the entire week and kept falling asleep. the entire week#i finally changed sheets on my bed#i made some macaroni#alll of which i wanted to do yesterday#and i havent done any chores i didnt wash the floor and i didnt vacuum and i didnt dust anything#i feel fucking terrible#i dont want to go to work tomorrow#i want to talk to my friends
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AH.
#wacky watermelons#listening to the last few eps of sherlock and co backlog#and. have spent the last 7 hours.. absolutely nauseous and off the shits#i finish sign of four part 9 tonight and then have to figure out how to go to bed bc i have an opening shift#fucking christ.#i am. off the fucking shits. i am going to throw up. im going to give myself heart disease#at work tomorrow im going to accidentally drop a fucking plastic bin on my head looney toons style and fucking die#so to sum it up: AH.
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the post grad why did i get an art degree what am i even doing what do i want in life where am i going crisis has finally hit i want to. lie down in the dirt. or something
#WHAT AM I DOING!!!!#i get up i go to my stupid retail job i stick labels on bags they pay me fucking thirteen bucks an hour i come home i lie on the couch#too tired to draw in too much pain to go anywhere no energy to reach out to college friends to do anything fun#no idea where the even start with getting an industry job no clue what i even WANT at this point#trying to remember what i loved so much about comics i want it BACK i HATE this#WHAT IS THE POINT!!!! WHAT DO I WANT WHERE AM I GOING!!! WHAT COMES NEXT!!!!!!#there's no clear career trajectory i can't do freelance i need structure i can't work too much i need free time#my brain doesn't work every job requires me to move across the country the irs just took fucking three hundred stupid dollars from me#my friends live in different states i can't get a job without experience i can't get experience without a job#i can't work on my portfolio with no energy and no time and i dont have any money and everything is so expensive all the time#i can't get anywhere bc i dont drive and im too stressed to think about taking driving lessons again#and WHAT DO I WANT!#THE MOST INTERESTING THING I DO EVERY WEEK IS GO TO PHYSICAL THERAPY!#I AM EXCITED EVERY WEEK FOR PHYSICAL THERAPY!!!! WHY!!!!!!!!#anyway WHATEVER i need to go to bed#delete later#i got into spx. today. so. had to have a crisis about how i felt when i attended spx (energized. excited. a part of something. ambitious)#versus how i feel now (tired. unmotivated. kind of apathetic about art. disconnected)#i dont miss the stress of school but i miss being around other artists. ppl who speak your language and who want the same things you want#ppl who are excited abut art and that makes YOU excited about art. ppl who get you#i miss that i want that back#whatever. its 1am i gotta go shower i have an 8.5 hour shift tomorrow. wahoo. $13.50/hr lets go
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i have nothing but free time rn but i will sooner just collapse into some kind of trembling sobbing mess before i start doing my assignments unfortunately
#girl what is wrong with meeee#and im so tired today too like i went to bed at like 3pm just cause i could sit upright auughh#like im feeling so much stress it should do the thing and make me do something but unfortunately im just shaking and thats it 😔#ajajajjj#doesnt help that someones is in the workshop already either like wed have to share space#and we both take up a huge amount of space with our works#idk if i shouldnt just go to sleep rn and just do everything at night or something aughh#if i can get myself to do it then -_-#i have to do it today and tomorrow i HAVE to do it#:(
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what 93 clip are we talking abt..
Its that scene from the last episode of 92 where jeans all How Much Do You Love Charles Xavier and eriks blows up all How Dare You Ask Such A Question I Owe That Man My LIFE or w/e
#snap chats#that was the one that hooked me like chat they said the L word#ik its not meant to be romantic but still …………….. woah …….#erik funny as hell in that shit he really got so offended 😭😭😭#it wouldve been kinder to shoot him like How Dare You Question His Love For Charles Xavier#really blew up on her like bro ok we get it you love him😭😭😭😭#sorry for asking now can you help save his life ……..#anyway everyone be nice to me today today keeps getting worse#i accidentally left my computer charger at my moms and its a four hour drive to and fro 🕴#and i have an advisor meeting in like two hours 🕴#i mean my computers at full battery so i can attend BUT STILL IM SO PISSED#i can do my comm work cause Thank The Lord of my tablet but still#im mad ……. im gonna lay in bed and daydream of old man yaoi to cope before working#ILL BE FINE. once the meetings done i just go back and get my charger#say hi to my dog and cat while im there ok Might As Well#and then come back and then it’ll all be ok#im just annoyed because my break’s literally after classes tomorrow fuckin driving around so much FOR WHAT 😭😭😭😭#driving i hate you i loathe you with every fiber of my being. moving on now ….
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my boss texting me at 1:30am (she works at 9am tomorrow) while im playing a mario game asking me if i can come in at 11am and then sending me this when i say yes might be the highlight of my week
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#and before you start wondering i know people are all ''never work when you dont have to'' on here#but i actually like my job and also money and i literally asked to pick up hours#im not giving in or whatever i actually just like my job and coworkers jhfkfjk#well anyways im going to bed bc i guess i work tomorrow now#night night <3#chat
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