#i have so many wild plans this year and i'm trying not to give too much away but im also just so excited

[javierpena-inatacvest]

Whatever My Wife Wants

Summary: On your honeymoon, Javi decides to break out a new accessory you've never seen him wear before. Little does he know, that seeing him wear a chain for the first time is about to drive you wild.

Word Count: 4.5K

Pairing: Husband!Javier Peña x Wife!Reader (no use of y/n)

Warnings: SMUT (18+), unprotected p in v sex (do better, but also its your honeymoon so who am I to say), oral (f receiving), vaginal fingering, paise kink, literally the biggest, fattest, ugliest breeding kink (I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm not), marriage kink (?) creampie, cum play, kind of exhibitionism (like if you SQUINT), talks of starting a family, Javi LOVES his wife, Javi in a CHAIN, Javi on his honeymoon deserves its own warning, did I mention that Javi LOVES his wife?!

A/N: shoutout to my sweet @honeyedmiller for this request after reblogging this MASTERPIECE from @enstatia. It's supposed to be a painting of Din, but it gave me such big Javi vibes, and I really haven't been the same since picturing the one and only Javier Peña in a chain (bc If i can't unsee it, you shouldn't be allowed to either) 😵‍💫 Also shoutout to Lucien Flores for singlehandedly ruining my life today with that new clip from the Uninvited (but also you can't tell me that this outfit is so Javi on the beach coded PHEW)

Can be read as a standalone or as a part of the Never Too Late Series!

Javi had never been one for jewelry- well, that was until a few days ago when a new golden wedding band had made a home on his hand. Since you had slipped it on his finger, Javi couldn’t get enough of watching it glisten in the warm, tropical sunlight on your honeymoon, a reminder that filled his heart to the brim to know that he was yours forever. 

Javi’s new wedding ring was the only jewelry that he had ever pictured himself wearing, until you had mentioned to him in passing while shopping for new clothes for your honeymoon how good he’d look with a chain to go with any of his outfits he had planned for the trip- considering there was no way Javi was going to have no less than 4 buttons undone on his shirt at any given time while basking in the tropical warmth of your honeymoon paradise. 

Later on that week, he had dug around in his dresser to find a thin, golden chain necklace he had back from his time in college, that hadn’t seen the light of day in too many years to count. But, given your enthusiasm for the idea of him wearing something like it, Javi had decided to pack it with him in his suitcase to surprise when the time felt right. 

Well, after being a few drinks deep at the pool bar from earlier, Javi’s slightly tipsy confidence had him feeling like now was the perfect time to try out his new accessory to see what you thought. Digging through his suitcase, he pulled out out the chain to go with the rest of his outfit for your dinner on the beach, clipping the necklace around his neck as he looked himself over in the mirror, quickly fixing his hair and adjusting his shirt, undoing one more button than probably necessary to show off his new look. 

And while he could admit that he didn’t look half bad with it on, and figured you’d like the new surprise addition to his wardrobe, there’d be no way in hell he could have ever prepared himself for the viscerally awestruck reaction you’d have to the thin, gold chain dangling around his neck.  

“I can practically feel you burning a hole through my chest, Hermosa.” Javi chuckled, raising an eyebrow at you as he took another bite of his food, giving you a playful smirk at the way you had been ogling at him ever since you had noticed the thin gold chain resting across his tanned skin as you began your walk through the hotel to head to dinner. 

“Oh shut up, it’s not my fault you’re so hot. You’re making it very hard not to look, in my defense.” You sighed, trying to get yourself to focus on your food instead of staring at Javi for the rest of dinner, despite the fact that the only meal you had your eyes on was sitting across the table from you. “There’s already something about you being my husband that makes you somehow even hotter than you already were, and now with this?” You picked up your fork, gesturing to the chain dangling between the parted fabric of Javi’s shirt, “I think you may be trying to legitimately kill me.” 

“Figured you’d like it. Didn’t think you’d like it this much.” Javi smirked, biting down on his lip before taking another bite of food, his cheeks growing flushed and warm as he looked at you admiring him, wondering how in the hell he had gotten so goddamn lucky. “Thanks, Mrs. Peña.” He laughed, taking another bite of his food, shooting you a quick wink. 

Mrs. Peña. 

God, if that alone wasn’t enough to send you over the edge already, your new last name, combined with the incredibly attractive man you had gotten it from that you now got to call your husband? On top of that stupidly hot chain he had decided to throw on with his outfit? There was definitely something else you were hungry for other than the half cleared plate below you. 

It was then that you couldn’t have been happier you had been seated at a table on the edge of the beachside boardwalk, tucked behind a few stray palm trees, secluded enough out of view that you had no problem reaching under the table to rest your hand on Javi’s knee, toying with the hem of his shorts before letting your fingers creep further and further up his thigh. 

“Are you almost done with your food?” You asked, your voice sweet and sultry as your hand brushing against Javi’s crotch immediately caught his attention, making his eyes go wide as he sat up straight, setting down his knife and fork to look down in his lap. “Because if you are, I can think of something else I want for dessert when we go back to our room. Something I want really bad. You wanna feel how badly I want it?” 

Javi swallowed hard as your fingers wrapped more firmly around his bulge, gently massaging his dick in your grasp, before grabbing his hand and guiding it to brush along the slit of your sundress and closer to your core, aching and dripping with arousal. Letting his fingers creep up the inside of your thighs and ghost over your folds, his eyes went even wider, jaw practically dropping open to feel that you were not only absolutely soaked, but also not wearing any underwear at all. Using every ounce of composure he had to keep from falling apart right then and there at the dinner table, letting out a deep sigh as he cursed under his breath. 

“Jesus fucking Christ. Fuck, baby… Yeah, I can be done right now.” He groaned, nodding at your proposition before wrapping his hand around the meat of your thigh as he took a long inhale, staring you down with darkening eyes and a devilish grin across the table. 

Never had you been more thankful that the resort you had picked to stay at was all inclusive, because if either of you had to wait a minute longer for a server to get your bill so you could get back up to your room, the probability of impending implosion would have been practically inevitable. 

Firmly intertwining your fingers with his as  you grabbed his hand, you were nearly dragging Javi through the hotel to the nearest bay of elevators, pleasantly shocked to find no one else waiting with you to travel up to their room, leaving the two of you alone to catch the next elevator back up to your floor. 

Without a word, the second the elevator doors had closed, the two of you were on top of each other, a messy dance of tongue and teeth crashing together, Javi’s hands palming the meat of your ass over your dress while yours roamed over his chest, tracing the freckles of his tanned skin up to the golden chain dangling in the open buttons of his shirt, stopping to wrap the necklace around your finger, tugging Javi closer to you. 

“Fuck, you look so good with this on, baby.” You moaned, your words hot against Javi’s skin as you nipped at his neck, chain still tangled in your grasp. “I can’t wait to fu-”

Barely aware of the fact that you had reached your floor, the ding of the elevator was enough to catch your attention and cut you off from completing the rest of your thought before the doors slid open, revealing a group of couples waiting for their ride down to the lobby. Frantically trying to play off the fact that if the elevator ride had gone any longer, you two definitely would have been seconds away from fucking in it, you gulped, giving Javi a nudge to his ribs to bring him back to reality, the two of you quickly trying to slide past the other guests without making a scene. 

As the door closed behind you, you and Javi couldn’t help but giggle at the fact that you couldn’t seem to take an elevator trip alone without almost being caught making out like a pair of horny teenagers (which, to be fair, a pair of horny teenagers probably would have had more self control than the two of you being newlyweds on your honeymoon). 

With your room only being a few doors down from the elevator, Javi began fumbling in the pocket of his shorts for his room key, working around the full hard on he already had under the fabric from how pent up he was. Quietly cursing under his breath until he found it, as soon as the card was swiping over the lock of the door, Javi was yanking you through into your room, instantly beginning to pull down the zipper to the back of your dress as you fumbled your way back to the bed. 

Your dress fell to the floor in a crumpled pile before Javi was tossing you onto the mattress, shocked to see that you also hadn’t even bothered to put on a bra, revealing your glowing skin and obnoxious tanlines from your time spent out in the sun. 

“Dirty fucking girl, not wearing anything underneath that dress for me. Fuck me, Hermosa. God, you’re so beautiful. So fucking perfect. My perfect wife.” Javi growled, dropping to his knees at the edge of the bed to part your legs, draping them over his shoulders as he admired the wet mess between your thighs, your slick already coating your folds, glistening in the dim light of your hotel room. “My perfect wife and her perfect fucking pussy already so wet for me. 

Dragging his fingers through your folds, collecting your arousal as he ghosted over your throbbing clit, you let out a soft whimper in protest, sitting up on your elbows to look down at Javi, peppering kisses along the soft skin of your thighs. 

“Javi, fuck- Baby, I wanted to go down on you. You look so good, I-I wanna taste you, Jav, p-please.” You moaned, your argument becoming less and less convincing as his kisses traveled to your center, nose brushing against your aching bundle of nerves before looking up at you with a lustful smirk, tightening his grip around your hips to hold you in place. 

Javi shook his head as he laughed quietly to himself, watching you squirm and buck your hips towards his face, so desperately worked up and aching that the mess between your legs was really beginning to contradict your need to get Javi off before yourself. 

“Cariño…” Javi tutted, almost mockingly, digging his fingertips deeper into the meat of your flesh, “You’re not going anywhere ‘till I get a taste. I can’t leave my poor wife all worked up like this, can I?” 

Before you had a chance to respond, the flat of Javi’s tongue was dragging through your heat in a long, broad stroke, firmly pressing against your clit, looking up at you with a satisfied grin as you threw your head back in pleasure, a soft whimper escaping from your parted lips. As the last of his lick slid through your folds, you shuttered at the feeling of the metal of his chain ghosting over your cunt as it dangled from his neck, only to cry out as you could feel the other piece of jewelry he was wearing on his left ring finger sink deep into your entrance. 

“Oh f-fuck-” You whimpered as another finger breached your tight hole, already sucking him in with your warm, wet walls while his digits curled, bumping against the sweet spot inside you that he knew made you crumble. 

“That’s it, baby girl.” He cooed, thrusting his fingers in and out of your cunt before diving back between your legs like a man starved, his tongue dancing in a swirling pattern of flicks and strokes between your folds as he lapped you up. You could feel yourself rolling your hips against his hand, whining at how thick and full he felt inside you, even more so now with the wedding band that had made its permanent home on his finger, taking every chance he could get to watch you cover the glistening gold ring in your arousal as yet another way to prove that you were his. 

Javi could feel your pussy beginning to flutter around his fingers as your bottom half squirmed against the sheets of the bed, the knot in your stomach beginning to tighten, tingling building at the base of your spine. Latching his lips around your clit, he began to suck at your sensitive nub, his hand thrusting faster and deeper into your cunt, feeling you slowly coming undone under his touch. 

“Oh shit- fuck, fuck, Javi, I’m so close baby, oh fuck, fuck, I’m gonnaaahhhhhh-” Just like that, you were falling over the brink of collapse, your orgasm crashing through you like a tidal wave, pleasure flowing through every inch of your veins as you met your high, feeling the smirk of Javi’s smile pressed against your cunt as you soaked his face, his free hand wrapped around your hip, holding you in place for him. 

“Fuck, I swear, I’ll never fucking get over that.” Javi mewled, pulling back enough to sit on his heels, admiring the wet and puffy mess your pussy had become, gently pulling his fingers out of your heat, looking down at the way your arousal coated his fingers, covering his wedding band. “Fucking soaked me, Hermosa. You like feeling my ring when I touch you like that, baby? Knowing I’m all yours forever?” 

With your chest heaving in heavy breaths, you nodded frantically, blissed out look plastered across your face as you stared up at Javi, lust pooling in the dark brown of his eyes as he brought his soaked fingers to your mouth, tugging at your bottom lip as, opening your mouth for you to suck him clean, the warm and tangy taste of you still fresh on his skin. 

“You taste so fucking sweet, baby. Mi esposa sabes muy dulce.” (My wife tastes so sweet) Javi cooed, gently tugging his fingers out of your mouth, standing up to lean over the bed, caging your body under his as his lips crashed against yours in a needy mess of longing and desperation. 

You could feel how painfully hard he was through the fabric of his shorts, his bulge straining against the seams of his zipper as he rubbed against your thigh, laying on top of you with one arm propped up beside your head, the other gently cupping your face, thumb rubbing back and forth along your cheek as he kissed you with the tender intensity that set your insides ablaze with desire, longing, no, needing to feel him buried deep inside you as you screamed his name. 

It really had been your intention to suck Javi off the moment you had gotten back to your room, to drop to your knees and worship the beautifully handsome man you now got to call your husband and turn him into the same type of moaning, whimpering mess that he had just made you, but with the ferocity of each kiss and the instinctual jerk of Javi’s hips, there was nothing you wanted more than to be filled by the sweet sting of his cock pounding into you, over and over.  

“J-Javi, fuck- I need to feel you baby, please. Fuck, I wanna feel you so deep inside me.” You whispered, your teeth tugging at Javi’s earlobe as he peppered your jaw and neck with kisses, feeling the audible groan in his chest at your request, followed by a deep sigh as he tried to compose himself from the mess he was already becoming. 

“Yeah? That’s what you want, sweet girl? Whatever my wife wants, my wife gets.” He rasped, a devilish grin spread between his cheeks as he sat back to pull his shirt over his head, followed by his shorts and boxers, leaving him in nothing but the gold chain still dangling around his neck as he reached down to stroke his cock, red and dripping with precum before leaning back down to line up with your entrance. 

You could feel your breath hitch as his tip brushed through your folds, rubbing gently against your clit as he collected your arousal to coat his length, looking down to watch as his length sunk deep into your cunt, the both of you letting out ragged moans at the sensation. 

Javi paused for a moment, letting you adjust to the sweet sting of his stretch as he filled you, his tip kissing your cervix while his hips met yours. The fullness made your brain go blank, completely at a loss for words as he began to slowly thrust in and out of you, pulling himself out enough to sink his whole length back into your cunt, each thrust making you whimper and moan, desperate for more. 

“F-fuck, give me more, baby, you feel so good.” You whined, your hand wrapping around his bicep, fingertips digging into his flexing muscles. 

“Yeah? You want more, Hermosa?” Javi mewled, smirking to himself at the blissed out mess you were already becoming as the pace of his hips rutting into you began to quicken. 

As each thrust became faster, the gold chain draped around his neck began to bounce against his chest, his body close enough to yours to feel the cool metal brush against your face with each snap of his hips into yours, the sight of his necklace dangling over you as you stared up at the furrowed and focused look painting his face. The image alone of him wearing that chain was enough to make you feel like you were going to cum on the spot, but as you lay caged beneath the weight of his broad body, feeling nothing but his warm skin and chain rub against you, you were nearly convinced it was going to be over for you right then and there. 

Without even thinking, you lifted your head up off the bed just enough to grab the chain between your teeth, tugging him closer to you, the sudden yank making his eyes go wide in surprise as the two of you came nose to nose, foreheads brushing against each other before his lips were on yours again, entangling you in an all consuming kiss without faltering in his pace. 

“Fuck, you look so good.” You moaned, your lips parting just enough from his to whisper your praises into his ear. “You look so hot with this fucking chain, Jesus Christ.” 

Your comment had a low, breathy laugh escaping from his chest, shaking his head to himself almost in disbelief at how enthralled you were with him. 

“Me? Baby girl, you have no idea.” He cooed, slowing his thrusts to sit back on his haunches, readjusting you to bring your knees pressed to your chest, leaning back down, running his hands along your body, up your arms until he had them above your head, pinned down to the bed in his grasp. “You know how many guys I’ve seen staring at you since we’ve been here? How many dirty fucking looks I’ve had to give them? Maybe this ring on your finger isn’t enough, mi amor.” 

“W-what do you, fuck- what do mean?” You whimpered, the new position opening you up in a way that had you feeling every inch of Javi as he sank his cock even deeper into your cunt, splitting you open in the most delicious way possible, your brain barely working enough to let your words escape from your mouth. 

“I mean,” Javi groaned, tightening his grip to hold you in place, his eyes growing darker with desire with another deep, long thrust into your heat, “That maybe, I need to fuck a baby into, Osita. Fuck a baby into my beautiful fucking wife, and let everyone see that you’re mine with our kid growing inside you.” 

Javi’s words sent a shiver down your spine, the thought alone making you whimper- You and Javi both had undeniable cases of baby fever, and now that you were finally married and had agreed that your birth control wasn’t going to be a part of your packing list, the prospect that in 9 months from now, you could have a third member to your family? That was enough to have you close to finishing right then and there. 

 A gulp traveling down your throat before a long exhale, trying to find the words to respond to his proposition, your voice trembling in an anxious excitement. 

“F-fuck- Oh my god, yes. Fuck a baby into me, Javi. Let me, oh shit- let me make you a daddy.” 

“Jesus Fucking Christ…” Javi groaned, gritting his teeth, trying his best to maintain his own composure, taking a long exhale before his gaze met yours again, a fierce kind of determination and promise pooling in the deep chocolate brown of his eyes, leaning his body on top of yours, pushing your knees closer to your chest, opening you up to an even deeper angle as his mouth crashed into yours, beginning to pick up his pace once again as his hips snapped into yours. “That’s what  you want, Hermosa? Fuck, I’ll give it to you, baby. Oh shit- Whatever my wife wants, my wife gets, remember? You want a baby? Fuck- I’ll fuck myself so deep inside you I’ll fuck a baby into you right now.” 

You could feel the all too familiar tingle beginning to build at the base of your spine once again, Javi’s cock pounding perfectly into your g-spot over and over again, the hairs at the base of his length grinding against your throbbing clit, sending you to the brink of collapse with each thrust in and out of your cunt. 

“Yes, oh my god- yes, I w-want it so bad. P-please, baby, fuck.” You whined, starting to stumble over your words as you could feel your pussy beginning to flutter around his cock, the coil in your core tightening to the point of nearly snapping. 

“Fuck- say it again. Tell me- mierda- tell me how badly you want it.” Javi moaned, his thrusts becoming slopier and more desperate as he could feel himself on the verge of chasing his own high, knowing all too well you were almost hitting yours.  

“I want you to fill me up, Javi. Fuck, fuck, fuck- I want it so bad. I want you to knock me up and give me a baby, please, baby, oh my god- please.” You were all but panting at this point, your legs starting to tremble as your cunt clenched tighter and tighter around Javi’s cock, the overwhelming sensation of his fullness, promise of pregnancy, and that damn chain dangling in your face was enough to finally send you over the edge. “Fuck, Javi, fuck, fuckfuckfuck, I’m so close baby, I’m gonna, oh shit- I’m gonna cu-ahhhhhhh.” 

Those were the last words you were able to muster before you were screaming out Javi’s name as you came, euphoria and ecstasy radiating through every inch of your body, your orgasm crashing through you with so much intensity you could have sworn you were seeing stars. 

Watching you fall apart beneath him, soaking his cock in your arousal as you came had Javi only moments behind you, the rhythm of his hips beginning to stutter, the lewd sounds of your skin slapping against each others combined with your wanton moans and whimpers and curses under your breath making him begin to babble incoherently. 

“That’s it, Osita. That’s my good girl. Fucking soak my cock, baby. Cum all over me before I, fuck me- fuck myself so deep in you it’ll fucking take. Holy fuck- Fuck, I’m gonna cum too. Gonna fucking fill you up. Give you all of me. Fuck, I’ll give you everyting, baby, mierda- everything you’ll ever wa-ahhhhhh” 

With one last final thrust, Javi was spilling deep inside you, warm ropes of his spend coating your walls, milking himself of every single last drop before collapsing on top of you, the warmth and weight and of his body sinking on top of your chest as the two you sighed in sync, trying to catch your breath with long, labored huffs. 

As Javi felt himself begin to soften, a groan rumbled low in his chest while he pulled out, feeling the mix of your spend dripping out your hole, coating the inside of your thighs in glistening juices. You let out an involuntary whimper at the loss of fullness inside you, your head falling back on the mattress in blissed out satisfaction, squeezing your eyes shut, trying to bring yourself back to reality after floating away in post-colotial bliss. 

“Holy fuck…” You whispered to yourself, lifting your head back up to see Javi sitting back on his heels, admiring the mess of the two of you pooling between your legs. 

“So fucking pretty, Hermosa.” He mewled, peppering kisses down the soft skin of your thighs, making his way back towards your core. Before you could even realize what was happening, Javi’s head was back between your legs, one broad stroke of his tongue collecting the tangy, salty mixture leaking out of your cunt and lapping it back into your entrance quickly replacing his mouth with his fingers to push the mixture of your spend even further into you. 

Looking up at you, slick covering his mustache and smug grin spread between his cheeks, Javi curled his fingers just enough to make you yelp as he pressed against your g-spot, considering how worked up and overstimulated you already were. 

“Gotta make sure I keep you full of me, baby. Can’t let anything go to waste.” Javi smirked, gently pulling out his fingers, resting his hands on your thighs, drawing soft circles on your skin with his thumbs. 

You tried to sit back up, propping yourself on your elbows before Javi’s body was caging over you once again, slowly lowering himself down until your back was flat against the bed, cradling your jaw as guided you down with soft, slow kisses, feeling his chain brush against your chin he pulled away from your lips. 

“You’re not going anywhere, Momma. My wife wants a baby? Then I’m doing everything I can to give her one. Whatever she wants.” Javi smirked, pressing a tender kiss onto your forehead as his hand caressed your face, brushing your skin just gently enough to tickle you, a little giggle escaping from your lips as your eyes met his sweet puppy dog ones. 

“You’re ridiculous, you menace.” You laughed, playfully nudging Javi as he rolled over next to you on the side of the bed, wrapping his arm around you, tugging you to lay against his bare chest, your hand draping over his stomach before crawling up his chest, wrapping his gold chain around your fingers. “Hmmmm whatever your wife wants, huh?” You smirked, looking up at him with a mischievous grin. 

“Whatever she wants, Hermosa.”

“Your wife wants you to never take this damn thing off again.” 

Taglist:

@chaotic-iguana @rhoorl @whyjuliaaa @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24 @3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo @endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @messinadress @milly-louise @jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled @pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper @nastiasnow @vee-bees-blog @hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse @mandoisapunk @msmorningstaarr @amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem @picketniffler @burningnerdchild @copperhalfcent @pedr0swh0r3

[pumpking64]

.

[inkskinned]

it is the first snow today. i think we should all have off work, even though it didn't stick. i think there should be 4 national holidays, one for each season. happy first snow, go home and make cookies. for spring it can be the first crocus. for summer the first lightning bug. for autumn, the first golden leaf. go home, kiss your dog, feed your cat (who is absolutely already-fed but somehow still starving.)

i think we should all take more showers together, but i mean that in the soft way. i mean it like taking a nap. two years ago i had 5 adult friends in my queen bed, all of us laying across each other, head over belly over thigh over hand. any time one of us would giggle, it would ripple over each of us, like pulling on a spiderweb. kim actually needed to nap and didn't get to sleep and i am still sorry for it even though this is one of my most precious memories.

i think we should all wash each other's hair, i mean. i walk my dog and i watch someone put up twinkle lights around their front porch. alex and i just moved, and i love the neighborhood. already so many of our new neighbors have stopped by to say hello. the nice lady downstairs also collects plants, like me. she gave us her number on a pink post-it note. i am trying to decide whether to make her cookies or brownies.

i am going through a very hard time. something bad happened this weekend that i do not wish to discuss. it is hanging over me. i think of the green ribbon, and the woman who had her throat cut. it feels like that sometimes, inside of my body. like i am walking and talking despite being half-corpsed. like i am hanging on by a ribbon, standing on some kind of cusp. i keep saying - at least it wasn't worse. we are so lucky it wasn't worse. the idea is river-rock smooth now, all the edges worried off.

in this very dark night - the sun sets by 3 now - people don't need to, but they try anyway. they paint the missing light into things. i have an embarrassing number of missed calls and texts, but i feel the love from them nevertheless - hey. if you need something, i'm here. i will bring you food/puzzles/anything. i got you.

i think we should all have a big group chat where we do errands with strangers. this week i got lost in a home depot, which is wild because i'm a lesbian and we are actually hatched in a lowe's lumber section. there were two other women in the whole store. we ended up shopping together, at first by accident (we all needed things in the same aisle), and then because, well, why not. one of the ladies was taller than me, so she pulled down the screws i needed. i am agile and have the personality of a raccoon, so they sent me after anything below 3 feet. we talked about holiday plans and never learned each other's names, but did learn all the drama about each other's families.

i am making you cupcakes, because i have so much affection i want to pour it into batter. you ask me if i am eating enough per meal. i wrap your gift twice, trying to do it prettily. i get excited to give it to you, just because i hope you'll be excited too.

my parents drive an hour just to see the new apartment and to do the parent thing; standing in the kitchen saying things like "oh you'll get so much use from this dishwasher" and "well, you could paint that" and "when your mother and i moved it was uphill both ways and in a snowstorm and of course your brother was an infant." my mother brought me a plant for housewarming. i always say i love you before she leaves.

i play dnd on tuesdays still, after all these years. we all keep that night free. at one point, between grad school and marriage and all of it, we had to have a serious discussion about how to keep it running. we will keep going, we decided eventually. just to see each other, even if we don't play - you are all important to me. sebastian is not prone to affection but last night he stole my usual sign off - i love you all, be good, he said. he was laughing.

i don't love the winter, actually. i like snow in theory, but i grew up in the north, and am too-familiar with the season of "mud and sludge". i don't like being cold. but i do love something kind of soft and rare: every year around this time, people remember oh yes. you and i are human together. and i have love to spare.

it is the first snow, and something in my heart is finally warm again. i have spent what felt like the last 18 months just going-through-the-motions. it has felt blank and immediate, like i would never actually feel again. that sounds extremely trite and stupid - but that is the boring and familiar experience of depression. life just washes up against your windows, and you watch it happening. you see things that should be lovely and affecting, and it just whispers too-thin. i was desperately uncreative. uninterested in my hobbies. unimpressed by my writing. i told my therapist, often, i don't know how to find hope again.

almost sheepishly, something strange and lovely is burning in my chest. i keep not-looking at it, worried it will scamper back into the shadows again. it is skittish and wild, but it is so warm i want to sink my hands into its fur and feel it breathing. i love-hate it: if it's real, it can hurt me when it leaves again. but i am icarus-born, sun-lover and poet: i can't help myself. despite my best intentions, i am falling in love with life again.

i am planning to make cookies for my friends. alex and i are going to go christmas tree shopping. we picked out matching dish towels last night, and they have little mushrooms on them.

i love you. it does come back. yes, even after a long time. even for you. i promise. keep trying. you will wake up and it will be a day you can smile about.

write me when you get there. we will take the day off of work, and i will wash your hair, and we will both be laughing.

[respectthepetty]

Peaceful Property - Wild Ass Theories

First and foremost, is nobody questioning the cage that was on the stage when Home was a kid? Because that is a cage, right? Right?

Theory #1 - Grandpa is the last ghost

Home inherited twelve properties, and we have twelve episodes, so we get a property an episode. His grandfather wanted a traditional 100-day grieving period before his ashes would be scattered at the little house, so the Scooby Doo Gang has 100 days to wrap this up since I think the grandpa will be the last ghost.

Theory # 2 - Home and Kan are related

I can't win prizes if I don't play games, and I think these two are related because 1) it would be funny that Home was trying to hit on Kan to begin with but also because 2) the grandpa's first wife had a three-year old daughter when he married her, then when his first wife passed away, he remarried and had two kids, one who is Home's parent, and the other is Home's uncle. There are a lot of gaps here because where is Home's other parent?

Plus the colors are coloring, especially for Kan, who is neutral color-coded up until now.

I've stated it every week, but Kan is not who she appears to be, because, Thai folks, correct me if I'm wrong, but all the names tie into the person. Home needs to find a home. Peach (food) needs to start cooking again. Ride needed to finish his last ride. Rak (beautiful) wanted to feel beautiful again. Pangpang (amazing) needs to be awesome. Even Best, if going off Pangpang's comments, needs to be the best. Which is why I don't think Kan is who she is because what does her name gotta do with anything? She is after something, and is it finding her parents? Her sibling? WHAT?!

She is always off doing something else when the ghost starts ghosting, so she has other plans, and I want to know what they are!

Theory #3 - Kan's ghost is from her childhood

Everyone has a ghost. Home's is his grandpa and Peach's is whoever is in this picture with him and Best.

And Kan is being haunted by . . . a parent? A sibling? Someone from her childhood? Which is why she doesn't believe in ghosts because if they existed, she thinks her ghost would have already visited her, but they didn't. Not yet at least.

We know Kan has a sweet tooth because she eats sugar at the table during dinner and pours more into her meal.

She sits in the car with her sucker in episode three.

In episode two, she couldn't decide which sucker to get in the store.

And in the trailer, a ghost seems to be handing her a sucker, but she seems younger here. If Kan had seen a ghost when she was younger, she wouldn't be skeptical now, so this is Kan seeing her ghost and reliving her childhood.

Which would make my Kan and Home are related theory better if Kan believed her parent went missing due to Home's family which is why she is investigating them, but both of them actually lost a parent in childhood because they had the same parent!

Girl also knows how to lay a wig, so I think she had to work from an early age since she didn't have a parent.

Don't ask too many questions or the theory falls apart. Just go with it!

Theory #4 - This is a BL without being a BL for a reason

Heteronormativity was the issue this week. The Scooby Doo Gang almost missed Thansai being the recipient of Ride's gift because she is trans, and they were overlooking that. And what Ride was gifting her was a home.

Then, Peach popped this banger out of his mouth without hesitation that even if Ride and Thansai weren't able to be together romantically, they were still each other's family.

And of course Pangpang gave us this golden nugget of saying Peach and Home were the mom and dad of the family.

But also, Rak had a husband that the gang didn't even consider, and when the husband shared his story, he said he had done what he could to help her move on, but their love wasn't the focus.

So what happens when red + blue combine?

They make purple.

I'm giving the show too much credit only three episodes in, but is the love less meaningful because it isn't explicitly stated? Is the relationship overlooked because it doesn't fit the standard of what we expect? The story doesn't need to state it's a BL for us to know they are in love, which is why the show isn't a BL.

This show is giving us VISUALS! Like Rak with the wig.

The uncle and the past that is haunting him.

And Ride's head cut off in the mirror, but also being told his face is too serious, so he finally smiles in the end when he delivers his gift.

Kan doesn't believe in ghosts because she hasn't seen one, but she is ignoring everything in front of her. We are being told every episode to believe what we see by the visuals.

We need to believe what is right in front of us and quit overlooking it simply because it doesn't fit the norm or isn't the sole focus.

They are in love.

[zinder-fox]

I was talking earlier about angst and Dazai committing suicide as part of that. And the following little drabble-thing was spawned from there. (So you can blame @the-port-mafia if this makes you sad. 😁)

I'm throwing this up here because I'm not planning to write a full fic for it, so if you're feeling particularly inspired by this, feel free to do so yourself. I'd love to be tagged in anything that comes out of it!

(there's angst and mention of suicide, so skip this if those bother you.)

"You know, it could be much heavier angst to have Dazai not kill himself." -me, before breakfast this morning.

On the surface, Dazai not killing himself is the opposite of angst. And yet, one could have both. To have Dazai make a promise to Atsushi that he would not try to kill himself anymore. To have to fight against both his baseline desire for death and the added desire to do so after a tragedy strikes, after Atsushi dies. To try to figure out how to live to honor his promise. Living, for Dazai, would be the ultimate agony.

You can also make it worse.

Because Dazai is only human after all. No matter what the name of his ability might imply. One day even he would lose the struggle to keep his promise. Is it days? Weeks? Months? Even years? It doesn't really matter. Everyone had accepted that Atsushi was gone, was dead. Everyone knew he wouldn't be coming back. Even Dazai accepts it eventually. Just one more grave he visits. Oda and now Atsushi. (Would he have them buried near each other? Would he want to be buried there himself?)

But what if Atsushi wasn't dead? Wasn't gone? What if his death had been staged so he could be taken captive, hidden away, experimented on, tortured and abused? What if Atsushi breaks himself free all that time later, only to find that he's too late. That Dazai is gone.

There's something to be said for the poeticism of Atsushi killing himself here. But that's not really in his character, to me. Atsushi wouldn't be the kind of person to commit suicide himself.

So instead, maybe he loses control. Loses the will to control his ability any longer. Lets himself be overtaken by a wild beast entirely. Gives up on living for himself. Atsushi has lost everything he wanted to keep in his life - his freedom many times over, his sanity, maybe even his humanity under experimentation, and now the one person he had come to view as truly safe, as his.

And so he gives in. He lets the tiger have free reign over his body. Lets it have a chance of its own to live.

There's something poetic that even when Atsushi would want to die himself, he can't bring himself to do it. He would instead live on, mind locked away behind the facade of a mindless beast. To live so that his ability can also stay alive. It isn't even a conscious choice he makes - it is all just instinct.

[cheeseceli]

Even after all

pairing: Beomgyu × gn!Reader

genre: fluff

warnings: none? lemme know if there's something I missed

A/n: nah this one's my masterpiece fr

"Y/n," you heard Beomgyu's voice through your sleep. Although it was soft, it was enough to make you open your eyes "wake up."

And so you did.

You saw your boyfriend's face before anything else. He was sitting on the bed side and he was very, very awake, unlike you. It seemed like he ignored the fact that it was nearly 2am and he performed the whole day, instead deciding to stay awake and active.

"Gyu? What happened?"

"Marry me."

You sat up as well. Your voice was hoarse and your vision was a bit blurred, but you heard him well. But that was reality. Maybe you were sleepy still. For what you know that could be a wild dream. So you replied with the only reasonable answer you could've thought of:

"What?"

"Marry me" he repeated himself louder this time, thinking that the only problem was that you couldn't quite hear him. Up on seeing your still confused face, he explained into more details. "I don't have a ring. I don't have a speech and I don't have our families approval. I wasn't planning on doing this. I thought about marriage quite a few times but I never actually planned anything. That is, until now."

"Did you plan this?"

He giggled, noticing how absurd the occasion was. But then he looked at you and you saw he had no intentions of backing down, his determination growing by the second.

"Waking up and asking for your hand before you could even process anything? No, I... I didn't plan this. But you woke up at 3 am yesterday because of your job and still waited for me to come home at midnight. You ask to watch all my performances even though they are basically all the same thing. You take care of me even when we're a sea apart. You always give me so much support and always help me improve. You said yes to dating an idol and haven't complained not even once, even when you had so many reasons to. For God's sake, you said yes to dating me" he said while laughing, with love shining through his eyes "and even though I can be a real pain in the ass sometimes, you never left my side. Y/n, I've never felt so loved before. And I would be and idiot if I didn't try to flourish it. So, marry me?"

He was holding your hand like it meant the most precious thing in the world for him, and it actually did. Not even once he stopped looking at you with so much love and determination. The more you looked at him the more you were speechless. You couldn't find the right words to explain your feelings even if you knew all the languages in the world, or if you had a million years to try, so you did all you could think of:

With open arms, you threw yourself over him making him lose his balance and making you both fall on the bed. Still, you didn't loosen your grip, hugging him tighter than you ever did. You were so close that you could feel his heart beat. Strong and peaceful at the same time. All yours.

"Should I take this as a yes?"

You nodded your head, unable of giving him a proper answer as the feelings were all over the place and the tears flooded down.

"Are you crying?"

"You just proposed to me, of course I'm crying."

He laughed again, taking your face into his hands. He was smiling. You swear you've never seen such a big and genuine smile plastering his lips before. "And you said yes. I can't believe you said yes."

"I love you."

"I love you too. Oh, how I love you. Let's sleep now, hm? I've already stolen too many precious hours of your sleep."

"I don't know if I'll be able to sleep anyways. You better not regret this once we wake up."

Beomgyu adjusted his position while not letting go of you. He hugged you tight and kissed your forehead. You couldn't see him, but you could imagine his satisfied smile when he said:

"I wouldn't regret this in a lifetime."

dividers by @cafekitsune

feedback and reblogs are always appreciated!

[something-wild-calls]

Modded by @loupy-mongoose.

Jamie Wild was a character originally created as a trainersona more than a decade ago, who gradually evolved into a character all her own and ended up the protagonist of a yet-unpublished Soul Silver Nuzlocke called Shadowed Soul. In recent years, after these many years of building her character and the Pokemon world around her, I've been wanting to make her completely my own, world and all.

Someday I still hope to tell her Nuzlocke story and keep up with her in the Linden Roots world, but here I will be giving an alternate version of that story--Some elements will remain the same or minimally changed, while some changes will be drastic. So both stories will hold their own merit, when comes time to tell them both. :>

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Asks Notice:

I'm having the inbox open only so that people can ask about specific curiosities, and allow for prompt inspiration. This is not an interaction or Role Play blog! I won't say it's impossible, but any asks worded as such will likely not be answered as such, and may not be answered at all. That being said, I do reserve the right to answer as I see fit. XD

For now I will leave anonymous available, but I will turn it off if anyone chooses to act in ill-will or with weird intentions.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Some notes about this story:

-The setting is the same world as my other story The Matters of Life and Death. So some things, such as staffwyrms and the way magic works, is the same between stories.

-I currently plan to tell it in a slice-of-life manner, probably through mixed means of comic, artworks, answered asks, and potentially writings.

-My aim with this blog and story is to have fun above all else! It's something I feel I shouldn't have to say, but at the same time I also feel I've lost touch with that particular motive. So I'm hoping to remind myself that my art and stories are mine, and are for my entertainment first and foremost.

For those interested in this old tale being made new, welcome! I hope you enjoy the journey! ^w^

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Content warnings under the Read More (To save space.)

WARNINGS LIST FOR THIS BLOG (Subject to updates)

DEATH INJURY/BLOOD VIOLENCE SPIRITUAL/SOUL DISCUSSION. (Not really in a Christian sense, but I'll try to tag it as such if it gets too close.) CHILD ABUSE CHILD NEGLECT CHILD INJURY/ENDANGERMENT CHILD ABANDONMENT

Related Tags to mute if desired:

#TW: Death -- #TW: Injury -- #TW: implied injury -- #TW: Blood -- #TW: Violence -- #TW: Christianity (If it comes up, but I don't expect it to.) -- #TW: Child Abuse -- #TW: Child Neglect -- #TW: Child injury -- #TW: Child Endangerment -- #TW: Child Abandonment

[pricegouge]

Fatted Rabbit Part Seven on AO3

Contents

Bearshifter!Price x reader | explicit

The alcohol is definitely making you sentimental and it's hard not to reflect on how isolated you'd been for… so many years. These old locals aren't your friends, but they're certainly friendly. You hadn't planned on putting down any roots here, but then John happened, and now Soap and maybe even Simon. The old Wild fan who you celebrate with when the muppets win. The night receptionist at the gym. You're not sure when it happened, but at some point you'd allowed yourself to become enmeshed - just a bit - in the tapestry of this town.

CW: alcohol consumption, heavy petting but no sex

The place John chooses is understated and casual, for which you're relieved. You don't mind being wined and dined but you'd dressed comfortably, with only skating in mind, so you're glad he hasn't brought you to some fancy touristy place downtown. He holds doors open for you and walks around like a peacock when his hand settles low on your back. He asks for a booth and at this point, you're not even surprised when he tucks in next to you instead of opposite, his big thigh resting warm and sturdy against your own; his elbow placed firmly on the table in front of you so you have to lean against his tricep to read the one menu he's apparently decided you'll share.

It's… nice.

You ask to see the salad section when he settles on some sloppy pile of meats, caramelized veggies, and eggs. He pulls a face at that but obliges and you decide to believe that's not somehow weight related.

"This one looks good," John comments a little too-blandly, pointing at a trough consisting of ninety percent steak and maybe a handful of arugula.

"Are you anemic? Should I be worried?"

John laughs, his arm shaking slightly against your chest. "It's actually your iron levels I'm worried about."

Ah. That's… maybe a little weird, but cute.

"I'm fine, John. Don't have much of an appetite, to be honest."

John looks a little miffed by this but doesn't comment when you ask the waitress for a simple Caesar. He gets his meat monstrosity and asks for it bloody in a voice that could charm the skin of a snake. He knows what he's doing, too, based on the entirely too innocent smile he gives the waitress as he moves onto his drink order, a strawberry shake. You can't help but laugh a little at him.

"I didn't expect you to have such a sweet tooth considering how skinny you are," you confide, a teasing smirk on your face which is immediately wiped straight off when John gives you a hurt, borderline panicked look.

"You think I'm skinny!?"

"Uh… no, like -. I mean, in shape. Fit. Sorry, no, you're definitely not skinny. That was poorly worded." You're floundering, trying desperately to fix whatever it is you'd fucked up. It had never occurred to you that someone wouldn't want to be called skinny, though it makes sense now that someone who clearly put as much work into maintaining his body would never want to be called scrawny. Christ, you'd fucked up. That's twice now. Oh god, he's never going to want to see you again. "I'm so sorry, I only meant -."

But John's peering back at you suspiciously now and it has your hands wringing. "It's okay, honey," he says after a moment, clears his throat. "I uh… lost a lot of weight over the winter. Suppose I'm a little sensitive about it, is all."

You're still a nervous wreck, doubly afraid now that you've upset him. Fucking hell, man's probably got some health issues he's getting over and you had to go and comment on his fucking body. "I'm so, so sorry, I should've thought -."

"Sweetheart, look at me. You're fine. I'm not mad."

Holy shit, he's not. He's -.

Right. This is John.

"Besides, you're right," he continues brightly, beaming at the waitress when she places the shake in front of him. "I am a little twiggy. Let's see if we can't fix that, eh?"

You're still mortified that you even commented on his body. After all the bullshit you've put up with in your life, you know better than to pull this shit. You hadn't meant it negatively, of course, but you know from first hand experience how little that matters. John looks happy enough now, but you won't soon forget how hurt he'd looked after your comment. You're still mulling over the best way to move on when he offers you a sip off his pink treat, dopey smile in place. You can't say no to that and he somehow manages to look even more pleased when you take a sip from his straw.

"So… weight loss… did you have any health scares?"

"Hm?" He jolts, eyes focused entirely on your lips. "Oh, no. Strong as a bear," he winks - weird. "Just lose my appetite under the Arizona sun. Always spend all summer trying to gain the weight back," he laughs, a little sad. "Good excuse to indulge, though."

"Well, indulge away. I do think you look good, by the way. Bet you'll look even better when you're comfortable and confident."

John smiles and kisses your forehead with slightly sticky lips. "Thanks, bunny. I think you look very good too, by the way."

He says it the same way he'd appraised the menu. "Thank you," you mutter, grateful that the waitress chooses that moment to return so he doesn't notice how much you blush from his attentions. It's still odd to you, someone as absurdly handsome as John Price being this sweet on you.

John eats like someone's coming to steal it off his plate. He remembers himself maybe midway through his burger and offers you a bite, but when you shake your head he shrugs and goes back to scarfing it like a stray dog. It's kind of impressive, honestly. More out of curiosity than any genuine hunger, you slowly and obviously grab a French fry from his plate which prompts him to grin goofily around a mouthful and spin the plate so the fries are closer to you. You'd been worried for a moment there that he may have some kind of feeder kink, but the voracity with which he's shoveling food into his own mouth combined with how he picks a singular cherry tomato off your dish has you thinking food might be more of a love language to him. That's okay. Cute. You can handle that.

John doesn't throw in the towel until his plate is completely cleared and when you see him eyeing your half full bowl you laugh and slide it his way. He laughs too, and says he'll make you something at the bar later to make up for it. You're not sure you'll take him up on that, but you won't lie that the ease with which he guarantees your next meal means a lot to you, considering how often a spoonful of peanut butter counts as dinner for you these days.

The waitress asks if you want dessert and John eyes you hopefully.

"You go right ahead, big guy, but I'm out."

With a sigh, he admits he should probably go relieve Simon and the two of you pack up without any sweets.

You follow him to the bar and he guides your Jeep back past a little awning and behind the building. He opens your door for you once you put it in park and gives you a hand down. "You can park right here anytime you need, honey," he says and you can't deny that the privacy afforded by the two surrounding walls is pretty tempting.

John takes you in through the kitchen where you find the most intimidating man you've ever seen in your life. He's muscled like a bull and taller even than John. A shock of pale blond hair; scarred, furrowed brows over dark, blank eyes; a black surgical mask and a matching baby gap t-shirt pulled taut over biceps bigger than your head. Here is a man that could make even Phil flinch just by yawning a little too hard, surely, and when he greets John, his voice is low like an oncoming bulldozer and just as deadly.

"Where the fuck 'ave you been?"

John doesn't even flinch. "Got lunch."

The blond man turns his gaze upon you for exactly forty-three seconds. Technically, his expression is completely neutral, but you can't help feeling like he's brought a pumpkin gutter to your eye socket, taken your measure by literally weighing whatever he finds in there. (Metric, of course, for accuracy's sake.)

"'Hope you 'ad fun. I fuckin' quit."

"Sure, sure," John rolls his eyes. He nods toward the front of the shop, "How's he doing?"

"Can't speak English."

"You can barely speak English, you filthy manc. How'd he do with customers?"

"Gave out 'is number three times, if that's what you're looking for in a keep."

John shrugs, "If it keeps 'em coming back."

"Gaz would've never."

"No, Gaz would've gotten theirs. He good with the till?"

"'Ardly trusted him with it, did I?"

"Christ, Simon, did you train him on anything?"

"Too busy house breaking 'im."

John snorts. "How'd he do, honest?"

"Hmph," Simon grunts.

"Hmph?" John repeats, valley girl inflection.

"Mm."

John gives you a 'holy shit, you seeing this?' look. "That good?"

"Said what I said. This the bird?" Simon nods at you, but John is hardly deterred.

"Yes. Should I extend him a year round offer, then?"

The other man's turn to ignore John: "Hi, pet. Nice to meet you."

"You're Simon, I gather?" You grit down on your resolve and extend him a hand which he gracefully doesn't crush in his calloused palm. "I believe I have you to thank for a great coffee date?"

"That's right, so if you ever want to trade up, I know plenty of things -."

But whatever he knows, you never will because John chooses that moment to get adorably jealous. "Awrigh', 'nough of tha'." His accent is thick when his hand finds your shoulder and guides you through the swing door into the front area. You pop out behind the bar, where a roguishly handsome man with a short cropped mohawk and upsettingly blue eyes is already grinning at you, probably having heard every word from the kitchen.

Sure enough, you have enough time to hear Simon warn John he was going to regret that before the mohawked man is inching closer. "Hi, bonnie," he greets you in a thick Scottish accent and you don't even have a chance to respond before John is right there, crowding you just enough to put the Scot on his back foot.

"Soap," John greets the other man, and mohawk smiles warmly at his boss, devilish eyes glinting with easy charm and just a touch of mischief.

"Price. Who's the lass?"

"Your test subject tonight. Pretend she's just a regular customer who doesn't know what she wants -." John guides you around the end of the bar to the very last stool as he speaks. "What would you start her off with?"

"Tha's easy, bonnie lass like her. Sit tight, hen." Soap (Soap?) gets to work behind the bar as John ducks back into the kitchen area for a moment. Whatever Soap's making looks simple enough, maybe four ingredients, but he makes it into an art form, coating the glass with whatever sticky syrup he's using for flavor before pouring his mix in and adding garnish. John returns wielding a laptop just in time to see Soap putting back the ingredients he'd used. Soap misses the small, pleasantly surprised look that crosses John's face, but you don't, and you understand when you take a sip; the light, citrusy flavor not at all what you'd expected when you saw him break out the thick syrup. You can't help your hum of satisfaction and Soap beams. "Good, right? Not too heavy?"

"Nope, just right. Thank you."

"Good, means you'll be able to drink all night," he winks. He turns to John, motioning to the register. "Am I…?"

"No, but you know how much that would cost?" John asks as he settles next to you and powers on his laptop.

"Sixteen ninety nine," Soap answers confidently and you nearly spit the drink back out.

But John is unaffected, sliding you the remote as he pulls up some scheduling app. "Good lad," he tells Soap and the man nods once, before getting lost on the other side of the bar, cleaning glasses.

John waits until the audience has left to sneak a sip from your drink. You raise a brow at him and he nods his approval before returning it to you. You settle on some old Quantum Leap reruns and John conveniently makes it clear exactly then that you need only say if you get bored.

You can't help but grin at him. "Unlikely. My buddy made up a hell of a drinking game for this show. Been a while since I've played it so I'll have to check the rules, but I think I can keep myself entertained for as long as this block goes."

"Drinking game for a show?" John asks, apprehensive.

"'Course, boss," Soap calls from the other end, not bothering to hide his eavesdropping. "When they, then you…" To you he adds, "Drink whenever Scott Bakula looks in a mirror?"

"That's what? One to start? We can do better." And just like that, you text a friend you hadn't been allowed to speak to in years.

You don't, so you send him the new one and within moments you're settling in to intentionally get tipsy, something you haven't done since the first time Phil laid a hand on you. There's a part of you that can't help feeling this is a bad idea, but another, much larger part of you is determined to put these fears in the past. So you share the rules with Soap and John nods approvingly when he pours himself a water to drink along with you. It's silly, and you feel a little weird drinking by yourself, but John's left hand stays rooted to your thigh, and Soap is eager to make sure you drink every time you're queued. He keeps your glass full, each drink slightly different. You comment exactly once that you don't want to mix your liquors and after that, Soap keeps you plied with the same honeyed whiskey he'd started you off with. They're all delicious, and John seems to agree if his tiny nods after each sample is any indication.

Eventually, real customers start bellying up and John sneaks back behind the bar with a kiss to your temple. By now you've switched the entertainment to the game seven you've been dreading, and the quiet old man next to you seems invested so you shoot the shit with him for a bit. Soap does well, from what you can tell. At least well enough that John feels comfortable spending much of the night in the kitchen. He pops out occasionally to offer you scraps, and check the score, says he's 'starting to get invested in these muppets.' John gloms on pretty quickly to the fact that melty cheese is your weak point, and you end up eating nearly a full dinner despite your general queasiness. The small crowd that gathers around the bar is mostly older, but they're all friendly, and the atmosphere is quiet enough that personal conversations eventually grow to include the whole group and you can't help the smile that slowly grows to overtake your face. The alcohol is definitely making you sentimental and it's hard not to reflect on how isolated you'd been for… so many years. These old locals aren't your friends, but they're certainly friendly. You hadn't planned on putting down any roots here, but then John happened, and now Soap and maybe even Simon. The old Wild fan who you celebrate with when the muppets win. The night receptionist at the gym. You're not sure when it happened, but at some point you'd allowed yourself to become enmeshed - just a bit - in the tapestry of this town. It's exactly what you said you wouldn't do, but when John subtly shakes a bottle of Advil at you from behind the kitchen saloon door, you can't bring yourself to regret it. You nod and he brings you out two along with a bottle of water. Soap switches you to ciders after that without being prompted. You're wary at first because of the sweetness, but he assures you the cider is light and crisp - that it comes from New York so you know it's good. You laugh, wondering if he knows, and take your first sip of home in years.

***

The good thing about living out of your car is you're never unprepared for anything. Before ascending to John's apartment, you stop by the Jeep to grab toiletries and pajamas. John grumbles about putting you in his clothes but you'd be mortified if you leaked on them so you make up some (not wholly untruthful) excuse about sensory issues and clothes needing to fit just right which you can see John filing away with the same seriousness he'd been using to prepare his schedule earlier. There's a nondescript door just in front of John's Suburban which he holds open for you. You lead the way up the stairs and laugh when you hear him hum appreciatively at the view it leaves him with. It turns to a squeak when he pinches just below the crease where your ass meets your thigh and then it's John's turn to laugh when the hand you reach back to stop him doesn't shove him away, simply keeps him in place. By now you've reached the landing and as John draws level with you, his heavy palm slides out and over your hip, coming to rest just a hair too low on your waistline to be decent. The landing is narrow, barely enough to fit a man as big as John, let alone your wide frame, but John doesn't seem in a hurry to open the door into his place. The only light source in the stairway is a small night light back behind John's calves and the ambient light coming through his curtained door panel. Backlit and bowed forward, John's presence is overwhelming. His scent - pine, petrichor, something personal - is inescapable and you almost wish he'd get the kiss you know is coming done and over with so you can get to finally (finally) sticking your face in his chest and just breathing.

Of course, then he does kiss you and you don't want it to end.

John's movements as he bridges the gap between you are slow and impending when he steps closer, boots heavy as one wedges its way in between your shoes. You're already impossibly close when he reels you that final inch by the grip he still has on your waist, meeting your lips with a measured duck of his head that leaves your own tilted back, neck exposed to the wide breadth of his hand which he places on the side there, cradling your jaw in such a way it keeps your head tilted exactly the way he wants you.

It's slow, sweet. Hot. John's mustache tickles but not unpleasantly - too neat and well groomed to be prickly. His lips are soft, addictive, and when he deepens the kiss, his tongue scorches across your own. He groans contentedly and somehow you know this ridiculous man is pleased with the taste of you: honeyed whiskey and sweet cider, the bits of greasy cheese he himself made for you.

He breaks off but doesn't go far, burrows his nose right under your ear and takes a deep, steadying breath. "You drive me fucking crazy, bunny. 'S this alrigh'? I can kiss you?"

"Yes," you breathe and he's immediately back on you, both hands framing your jaw now. At some point your own have found the unzipped edges of his Carhart and you try pulling him closer. You only succeed in moving yourself, however, because you'd forgotten John is built like a brick shithouse, even if he thinks he's scrawny.

He obliges you anyway, backs you up enough that you gently bump into the wall, and then your skull is cupped in a protective hand as you're pushed more insistently against it. John is a solid, burning wall at your front. Even through the layers of thermals and jackets you can feel the heat of his skin and you're torn between the desire to be naked under him, sweaty, slick, panting; and to simply see if he'd humor you by holding still long enough to be used like a heating pad.

You pant when John moves to your neck, nipping at the soft skin there until he draws a breath from you that sounds suspiciously like his name. Like this, you can see where his beanie has ridden up just slightly, exposing a bit of hair above his temple and you feel like some repressed Victorian man catching a glimpse of ankle. You're on him in a moment, sniffing his scalp like a fucking dog and you'd maybe feel a little bad about it if not for the way he groans - if not for the way his overwhelming presence makes you feel a little crazy.

"Want you," John tells the bit of décolletage he's uncovered, 'T' enunciated with teeth framing collar bone. Some harefooted intrusive thought has you wishing he'd bite down, wanting to hear it crunch under his jaw. You can feel him now, hard against your hip. He doesn't do anything with it - doesn't grind it into your flesh or bully your hands down to feel the weight of it - but it's enough to know it's there, has your grip moving under his jacket, spanning his ribs.

"John," you gasp again - pleading maybe. Perhaps a warning.

"I know, honey. I know." He sounds miserable. "Won't touch, I promise. But this is okay, right? I can -. We can -."

"Yes."

You're not sure how or when John gets the door open. There's a clatter and a lighting change you barely register from behind your closed eyes and your lifted onto a counter and that's about the hottest thing anyone's ever been able to do for you so you spread your thighs wide on instinct and John takes his reward by slotting himself in as if he bought the fucking deed. "Won't touch, sweetheart, I promise," he repeats as he shoves your coat off your shoulders and admires his handiwork. "Just want to feel you. I want -. Want to…"

Instead of running his intentions by you verbally, John drops to his knees and buries his face in the crotch of your leggings. You yip in embarrassment and try to scramble further onto the counter to get away from him but his grip on your thighs may as well be made of iron. "John, that's… I'm -."

You're interrupted by the heavy sound of his breathing as he takes a fucking whiff of your cunt.

"John!"

"Christ, bunny, I could eat your right up," John murmurs, lips still pressed against your pussy. You gape at him but the look he gives you from under his heavy brow isn't chastised at all.

He looks rabid.

You gulp and John chuckles, deep and dark. "Not gonna," he assures you yet again, but the hot streak he licks up the seam of your leggings almost has you wishing he would. "Not gonna," he says again, and you realize he's saying it for his own benefit when he stands and places a quick peck on your mons. You're briefly embarrassed by the hair he can probably feel through your thin layers, but you catch him taking another quick sniff which -.

Well, it's odd but at least it completely eliminates every ounce of self-consciousness you've ever felt about your pussy.

John groans, works his teeth against the texture he's found.

"Not gonna?" you tease him, not really at all surprised by how breathless you sound.

John huffs, hot and humid where it gets trapped in the fabric beneath his mouth. "Not tonight," he agrees.

"C'mere." You try to help his weak morals by hauling him up by the shoulder. It's a laughable attempt at best, but John doesn't laugh as he obliges.

"Shouldn't have gotten you drunk," he pouts against your lips.

"Still would've been on my period," you remind him, embarrassed as if the word shouldn't even be spoken at a time like this.

"Always did like my lamb bloody."

"John!" he laughs and you tap him lightly on the pec, which only seems to please him more.

"You won't let me play with my food, bunny?" He's looming over you now, hand resting on the counter behind you. You try to imagine him with blood - your blood - all over his face and find -,

"It's not gross?"

John's smile is wolfish and you're caught in his jaws. "No, sweetheart. One of my favorite treats."

"Oh." That's -.

Why doesn't that gross you out?

"We'll talk about it in the morning, yeah? For now, let's get you comfy and ready for bed."

He gives you one final, lingering kiss. You're not sure when he managed to pry your bag off you, but he retrieves it from the kitchen floor and guides you to his en suite. When he runs the shower, you ask if he plans on joining and the look he gives you is that of an owl spotting a field mouse.

A stupid, drunken voice in your head is starting to believe this man actually wants to eat you.

"Won't touch."

When he leaves, he doesn't close the door so neither do you.

John's body wash doesn't smell like him. It's some citrusy bergamot number, at which you are entirely pissed. Still, the water is hot and the pressure is good so you luxuriate a bit, trying to angle yourself right so that the stream can massage some of your back ache away. You had a blast today, but you'll definitely be happy just to lay down soon. You hope John's not too proper to share a bed with you as you kinda really want to be snuggled. When you exit the shower to find him sitting on his bed, staring at you unabashedly as you towel off, you're pretty sure you have your answer. You give him a little show, giggling when he grunts at the way you bend to reach your bag. Eventually you do have to shut the door on him so you can take care of some more private concerns. He's in flannel trousers and not much else when you finally emerge from the bathroom, still just sitting on the edge of the bed. You stare at him for a moment, a little timid after your show. John is solid: thick muscles cording under a thin layer of fat. You think maybe his skin looks slightly baggy on him, but it's hard to tell through the thick hair that coats him. He lets you look your fill for a moment before motioning you closer with a quick curl of his fingers. You stand between his legs and his big palm skates up over your thigh, hooking his fingers into the band of the men's boxer briefs you wear to bed from where it's visible above your sweats and snapping it lightly.

"Whose are these?"

"Mine?"

"Mm. Coulda given you a pair of mine, if you wanted."

"I can wear my own underwear, thank you," you laugh. "Wait, are you jealous?"

"Yes," John admits easily, fingers pulling at the band as if threatening to take them off.

"Of what? I bought these myself," you laugh again.

"Ah." John has the decency to look sheepish as he gently lays the band back where he found it, double rolled to keep from indenting your skin.

"You're ridiculous, you know?" His jealousy rings a tiny little alarm in the back of your mind but you choose to ignore it until you're sober and can be more reasonable.

"No argument there. Are you ready for bed now or do you want to watch something?" He looks so sweet again, big puppy dog eyes as he looks up at you. This is the man who takes you on dates and kisses your temple in public. It's hard to reconcile him with the starved animal he'd been when he'd had you laid out on his counter, but you find you definitely don't mind the duality.

"Are you up for a movie?"

He nods, "Whatever you want, honey."

"Well, what I want is a stupid kids movie, but that'll probably ruin the mood so, like… you pick."

John just smiles up at you dopily. "That sounds perfect. Anything to help me keep it PG," he winks. It's not a good joke, but he's so proud of it it's hard not to laugh. You decide on Who Framed Roger Rabbit because it's a good goddamn movie and because you don't want to subject him to anything egregiously childish. John laughs at the title and too late you realize your mistake.

"Oh, bunny, you don't think this one will be too scary for you?"

"Shut up," you laugh, fluffing a pillow a little too aggressively in his direction. He pulls it from you easily and uses it to prop himself up against the headboard a bit. The position turns his belly into a perfect pillow of your own and you dive in, kissing the ticklish hairs under your cheek just to watch his abs twitch.

"Brave rabbit. Keep testing me and Judge Doom won't be the scariest thing you see tonight."

"Why do you call me a rabbit, anyway? That a Britishism?"

"Sure."

With John's fingers in your hair and the low buzz of whiskey still in your veins, you only make it to the patty cake bit before you're dozing off.

John notices. "Am I sleeping in here tonight, bunny?" His voice is low, an earthquake at the edge of your hearing.

"God I hope so," you mumble into his belly, mortified to find a bit of drool sticking to his hair. If he notices, he doesn't say anything and you fall back asleep for a while. When the movie ends, his shifting wakes you again. You wouldn't mind except it seems the Advil from earlier has finally worn off and you're starting to get crampy. You shift, restless, but John slots himself against your back, his skin like a furnace on your achy back.

"Shh, I got you sweetheart. Go back to bed." You do, right after pulling at his arm until his broad, warm palm places a good amount of pressure right over your sensitive belly, too content to feel self conscious.

Next>>

[a-father-of-light]

I have so many thoughts on Jack & Joker, but I have been to lazy to write them down. At this point I'm doing my self a disservice by not joining the conversations that are happening in the fandom.

Episode 1

A strong first episode. I liked that it focused on establishing the setting and introducing the main characters.

We see the poverty in the community, which is a recurring element in the story. It's a driving motivation for the characters' actions and decisions. It also plays into the crime and corruption in the community.

Jack

Firstly, Jack is so different from Vee (Yin's biggest role out of Jack & Joker). This matters to me because, while War is clearly the stronger actor (objectively and respectfully), I'm glad to see Yin hold his own.

The writers very clearly establish that while Jack could have been corrupted by his environment, he chooses to do the right thing. He's a good person. Note: I'll circle back to this point later.

Episode 1 Jack isn't overly complicated. He's a good person, but life is not kind or fair so circumstances land him in the last place he wanted to be.

Joke

War! I could cry! The actor that you are!

I don't have many notes on Episode 1 Joke. Only that War is ACTING!

However, I found myself questioning Joke's decision to give Jack the money that he stole... It was way too easy to trace the money back to Jack. What was the reason???

Overall, Yin and War have crazy chemistry.

Also, Beam Sarunyoo appeared on screen for a few minutesn as Boss, at the end of the episode and I was sold. I believe him as a kingpin loanshark.

Episode 2

Five years later

Joke

Joke getting released from prison and immediately going to find Jack was funny to me. I mean, I know he is essentially estranged from his family. But it's kinda wild how he didn't even check on them first. He went straight to Jack! Comedy!

Jack

I respect the decision to keep Jack true to his good and kindhearted nature, but I personally would have loved to see him changed but his experiences. Note: this is me circling back.

Jack paying the money back for the debtor's while still being indebted to Boss himself only continues the cycle of poverty. I know he doesn't want to see the people in his community get hurt and he doesn't like violence but what is the plan here? What future do any of them have if they can't collectively raise enough money to pay Boss and be done with him?

Also, I liked the idea of Jack the Reaper. It's been 5 years. I personally would have liked to see Jack genuinely changed by what he has experienced in the 5 years while Joke was in prison. I would have liked to see a jaded or morally questionable Jack. I would have like it if the narrative was Joke seeing and having to deal with an amoral Jack and was eventually corrupted by his environment after being naive and gullible in his youth.

I'm not mad at the plot twist. Finding out that Jack was secretly paying off people's debt and putting on a 'touch guy' act was still a nice touch by the writers. What I get is, ultimately, after everything that happened to him, Jack is solely angry at Joke. Even with everything he has seen and has had to do, he isn't cynical/ angry or bitter towards the world. He has reserved is angry for Joke. Which I find interesting, because even in his angry and mistrust of Joke, he doesn't react overtly violently to seeing Joke again. His reaction is relatively tame. If anything, the violence comes off as Jack trying to scare Joke off; to get Joke to leave him alone. He never looks like he actually wants to hurt Joke. Not really.

Also, Yin looks so good in every scene.

Getting to meet the other characters was fun. I have seen and followed the actors in the show to some degree throughout their careers. This is a well deserved opportunity for them.

Prom Ratchapat and Mark Siwat better happen.

They have been teasing these two for literal years.

Mark is so talented. He can really act! I'm so glad he is in this. I want him booked and working.

Hope is such a good character. Naming a violent henchman Hope was such an inspired idea.

I do think the writers are very obviously trying to juxtaposition Jack and Hope. I'm excited to see where they take it.

I won't lie, at the end of episode 2, I was questioning why Jack didn't just pack up his grandma and run far away in the middle of the night. The ring does not seem like a good enough reason to stay. I mean, I get that it's sentimental, but he has pictures of his parents! It could NEVER be that serous for me. It's just a ring.

Overall, episode 2 established that 1) the actors are acting, 2) the production team come to work and 3) the budget is there!

Episode 3

War stole the show!

Everyone looked amazing in episode 3.

A show has to be really good and well written for viewers to enjoy it and be invested when the episodes have a runtime of roughly an hour each and nothing particularly romantic has happened. I mean yes, Yin, War and their chemistry (sexual tension) are in a committed relationship (the 3 of them seem very happy together). But plotwise, Jack and Joke still have alot to resolve before they can/do get together.

Yet again, doing all of that for a ring just doesn't sit well with me... I'm not risky my limbs, my freedom and my life for a ring.

Tattoo stealing the necklace. Bruh...

Tattoo and Hoy leaving Joke behind. Bruh...

This is where we see how poverty affects these people's lives. A call back to episode 1. Tattoo is not a bad person, he is a very desperate person with limited options in life (and most of those options lead to a life in crime either way).

I won't lie, if Aran/Arun and Tattoo end up together in the show, I will enjoy seeing the juxtaposition. The difference in wealth and family dynamics. The ridiculously rich boy with a cold father and the poor boy with a loving mother.

Jack

The end of episode 3 was the first time we saw Jack do something selfishly for himself. Letting Joke take the ring was not an easy decision but he does allow it. I like that he put himself first but I knew that it would not be without consequences.

Joke

All I really have to say is, we fully got to see Joker.

I feel Iike episode 3 is what they used as a pitch to War. Episode 3 makes me believe that everyone involved in Jack & Joker understands and fully believes in War's talent.

Episode 3 was great.

[whoishotteranimepolls]

In Defense for Sabo (Why hes appealing to me)

To be perfectly honest, I am absolutely down bad for Sabo. I am a Simp in every sense of the word. So understand, I am biased by this point- That out of the way, he's perfect your honor. He's so tragic, so cool, and so silly- i think people overlook him because out of the ASL trio he has the least amount of screen time of the three- but everytime he's there it's a wild ride

I coukd write a really shitty 100k word thesis on this bastard(affectionate) so I'll try my best to keep it short

How do I even begin this? What hooked me initially on his character as a whole was how he was born into nobility and instantly hated it. He could see how messed up the people around him were even as a child, Hes a born anarchist. So he runs away and meets angry child Ace and then they're both menaces to society with a plan on ditching this place. You know the backstory I don't gotta explain more but like, the whole ASL brother dynamic is amazing and hes so middle child coded. Then the tragedies begin- in literally every single way the upper class could be horrific and terrifying, it happens over and over within like no time just to really hammer into him his distaste for the whole system. To skip all the angsty details, He felt so cornered that he ran away. Just sets sail despite his age, then of all people to aim a weapon at him, a Celestial Dragon proceeds to give him amnesia for the next like 9 years of his life with some insane blunt force trauma. That gun was basically an explosive canon, the fact Canon!Sabo just has the eye scar is why so many artists headcanon him with a much bigger scar. How he survived that is just a testament to how he's just

Built Different™

Then he basically jumps into the deep end so to speak with no fucking memory. By the time Ace is setting sail- he's already insanely strong. He ends up second in command for a reason- he's smart, he's powerful, he's got that never ending well of stamina just like his bros, he's a beast

And what finally brings back his past? He sees the news about marineford. What rejogs his memories- is his brother fucking dieing. (Oda basically confirmed that if Sabo had his memories, Ace would have lived. I mean- pretime skip Luffy almost succeeded- putting Sabo in the mix would have absolutely turned the tides. But that's beside the point- as i said hes just strong) Sabo only remembered when it was already too late- like...holy shit- the Angst. Tragedy after Tragedy and he couldn't even try to help this time-

Listen, what I'm trying to say is He's cool and angsty (like every other character tbf lol). He's just like his bros, a crazy bastard with a heart of gold who breeds chaos by being himself and standing for his ideals. Luffy and Ace have some crazy bloodlines and ya know, D. But Sabo is just Sabo and is right there with them in levels of chaos from day one.

He's just Built Different™

His whole presence in Dressrosa was amazing and hilarious- he shows up for the first time in- ever, one whole body luffy hug later and he's in the coliseum in Luffys disguise being an absolute badass. He successfully gets Aces fruit and then destroyed the coliseum with one move- he has some insane Haki and wields a damn pipe at the same time (the fact its something he kept from his time with his bros is so 🥹 but the juxtaposition is hilarious) Evertime he fights in this arc it's them sitting up the altercation and next time you see him- hes won and moved on to the next thing he's doing. One of my favorite little things is after Dressrosa -when he talks to the few who weren't passed the fuck out- and he gives Luffys vivre card to the strawhats. Not his personal Card to luffy- Luffys to his crew. He hasn't seen his brother in at this point like 10 years and somehow had his DNA to make it- everyone overlooks his crazy but it's hilarious

One of the best hugs in the anime just saying ^

I was head over heels after Dressrosa ngl.

If Luffy is silly and Ace is hot cool guy, Sabo is right in the middle. I do think it's funny he's boiled down to the smart one of the three, he is, but he's also so much more. Also, as the person who originally asked what the appeal was said, yeah he also doesn't smell like a trashcan. He's the only one of his bros that takes a regular shower lmao. And while I do blame my insant love for the tophat look on my prior love of Jacob Frye from assassins creed, I think he's got style too. He looks good and he's wearing a damn cravat(the white neck scarf thing) most the time, he pulls it off. The movie look with the teal/cyan trenchcoat, the Reverie scenes, the newest episodes he just got animated in again-

He is beauty, He is Grace, I want him to sit on my fa- sorry

For context, they are responding to this post about Sabo

Wow, I'm impressed the one piece fandom never ceases to amaze me with your dedication to your characters

[blackaleycatt]

Random Wild Kratts Headcanons: Megan Thee Stallion Songs

Songs that I think the characters would like or songs that represent them because I love Megan.

Y'all better stream Hiss!

Martin: Ungrateful

Everyone knows that Martin is a nice man. Even the villains know it.

Sometimes it seems like he's a little too nice tho. Like the villains definitely take advantage of it.

Martin can be a nice person but when you mess with animals, his friends, or his brother he can become a different person.

I think the lyrics “Y'all actin' really ungrateful, I'm sparin' you hoes” represent this.

I feel like he could be a lot more violent towards the villains but chooses not to.

Basically, he is sparing the villains despite everything they have done to the team and the villains are “ungrateful” because they constantly act the same way.

Chris: Savage

His sassy attitude fits this song well.

It doesn't matter if it's a villain or his own brother. That lil sassy attitude is always gonna be there.

I feel like he would actually call himself a savage after listening to this song.

“Been that bitch, still that bitch”

And he literally is. Not only has Wild Kratts been around a long time, but Chris has been iconic since Kratt’s creatures and Zooboomafu have been around.

Koki: Plan B

This song is about Independence and having a high self-worth.

Koki definitely has all of that.

She's technically a minor character but she leaves a big impact on the team and the show in general.

Also, I feel like a lot of the time she’s the team's “Plan B” meaning when there's a problem that the boys or Aviva can't fix she has to step in.

Usually involving the miniaturizer because they never listen when she tells them to keep up with it.

She’s like the only other person on the team with a fully functioning brain cell.

Jimmy: Hot Girl Summer

This was THE summer song so you know Jimmy was listening to it.

Probably says “It's hot girl summer” every year to Aviva and Koki.

The chill vibe of the song matches his personality.

I can see him lounging in the sun bobbing his head to this song.

I don't really have a deep reason for why this song is for him, it’s just chill.

Aviva: Hiss

Hiss blew up because it was a diss track calling out basically everyone in the music industry.

I feel like this fits her attitude towards Zach specifically.

Like she seems like she wants to say “Fu*k you” to him so badly.

Based on the “Mystery of the Weird Looking Walrus” episode Aviva seems to be a very observant person and knows a lot of tea about people.

Like how does she know what Zach eats every day and how many toes he has on each foot 💀.

And she was able to guess his password easily on the first try.

Basically don’t piss her off or she will air out ALL of your business, like she did with Zach.

Also, I feel like she listens to Megan when she’s angry.

Donita: Megan's Piano

If feel like she's also a Megan stan.

This song is her anthem.

One thing about Donita is she is gonna let you know that she is NOT poor and she works hard for her money.

Like she’s the hardest-working villain besides Gourmand.

Donita is a self-made queen.

Girlboss.

She likes this song because it reminds her that she's better than everyone.

Every time Chris and Martin come around she mentions wanting to give them a makeover and drags them for their fashion choices.

Definitely says “Sorry, hoes hate me 'cause I'm the it girl”.

You can't spell Donita without “it” after all.

Gourmand: B.I.T.C.H

I don't think he would actually call someone a bitch (he's southern-raised, he has some manners) but the vibe of the song fits him.

I think he would like the lyrics “You know you can't control me, baby, you need a real one in ya life.”

Gourmand is kind of like Zach in the sense that he does what he wants whenever he wants.

Hence why you can't control him.

He’s not like Donita who would use animal substitutes in his profession (the fake spider silk) no matter how hard the Kratts try to convince him.

He does what he wants and you can't control him.

He's also very straightforward with his feelings.

If he doesn't like you he’ll let you know.

Zach: God's Favorite

Zach relates to the song based on the title alone.

He truly believes that he is favored and highly regarded.

Him being the “favorite” could be a general feeling or a reference to how he feels about Aviva and her inventions.

He doesn't see himself as equally matched to her or anyone. He sees himself as the ultimate person basically, even above the other villains.

Despite his incompetence, he is still rather skilled in some things and successful.

The lyric “Here's a toast, who you love the most?” is also him talking about himself since we all know who his favorite person is.

I feel like he would listen to this song to boost his confidence.

[loz-furbies]

Breath of the Wild / Age of Calamity / Tears of the Kingdom Zelda, part 2/2

Role in the story

BotW, AoC and TotK stand out among the LoZ games in that they're specifically Zelda's stories in a way only Spirit Tracks can rival. Or Skyward Sword also did a similar thing where you first try to figure out what the deal with Zelda is, but I'd say that in that game Link's own journey to becoming the hero he needs to be is just as important, while BotW Link's is feelings about his adventure are more implied that explicitly shown in his games. While the actual story of BotW and TotK is pretty similar to most loz titles as far as Zelda is concerned (she is in some kind of trouble through the whole time and only clearing the game can help her, and she has minimal impact to the actual gameplay of the final fight), since we get to see so much of her own story, her contributions still feel a lot more meaningful than just doing something fancy in a cutscene after the player has done all the actual work. And despite being absent for the whole game, Zelda still has a lot of presence, since searching cutscenes about her is the main quest, and so many side characters talk about her.

I prefer Zelda's story in BotW over TotK, because in BotW she has internal conflicts and character development, while in TotK she is more about dealing with the external conflict that the plot throws at her. Or you can say that she is unsure about what to do at first and has grown more confident by the final Dragon Tear cutscene, but I don't think this was motivated by any personal growth about her. Also I'm not a fan of how the Master Sword just shows up on its own in the past, because it makes it feel like she's just acting on someone else's plan and the whole draconification is pushed on her. The scene where she eats the secret stone is really good, but I would rather have had her also intentionally pull the Master Sword to her after she comes up with the dragon plan to give her more agency about the whole thing.

TotK also has the issue that while the scene where Zelda sacrifices her humanity in order to restore the Master Sword is incredible, when it comes to gameplay impact, it comes across as underwhelming. Like this is a reincarnated goddess who gave up her all and has been pouring her strength for a billion years into this sword as a culmination of the dramatic flashback story, and what you get out of it is... a base power 30 weapon. I get why it is like this for obvious balance reasons, but from a pure story perspective, there's so much narrative weight on the Master Sword that at this point it should be able to one-hit-kill anything that isn't Ganondorf.

Showing the cutscenes about Zelda in mostly random order is a somewhat risky way to tell the story. I got a satisfying story in both BotW and TotK, but I figure that your opinion about Zelda might be coloured if the first BotW memory you see about her is the one where she acts rude towards Link. But I do like how any of the memories being optional naturally plays into the ending of the game where Zelda asks if you remember her; how well the player knows Zelda probably factors in how they feel during this scene, so I'd say that each player gets the ending they deserve.

Meanwhile in TotK I feel that after getting the geoglyph where Zelda makes the decision to turn into a dragon, the rest of them become less meaningful when the mystery about where she disappeared has already been solved. And speaking of which, I really wish the game handled the mystery about Zelda in the present time better because all red herrings about her become incredibly awkward when Link already knows where she is. I can still sort of buy that he wouldn't want to discuss this with Penn, but the main story missions really should have had an alternate version if you already did the Dragon Tears quest. And puppet Zelda in Hyrule castle towards the end doesn't work too well either, like what am I expected to feel about this suspiciously behaving Zelda when the game has already made it clear that it can't possibly be her?

Also it should be noted that as has become somewhat of a tradition, Zelda also gives you the Bow of Light in BotW. Which feels a little superfluous there since it's not really related to the rest of her story, but whatever. She also takes part in the TotK final battle as the Light Dragon, though she's not a very active participant when she just automatically carries you higher when you fall down enough, and later she has no memory of her time as a dragon anyway. But it's nice that she was included in some way at least.

AoC tells a similar story about how Zelda goes through failing to awaken her powers to confidently wielding them in a battle, but it feels completely different since the player is present through these events instead of seeing them in a flashback cutscene. And I would argue that Zelda just flat out is the main character of that game, sure you start as Link but Zelda already becomes a playable character in chapter 2, and story-wise Link is feels very much like an afterthought.

AoC makes her a badass fighter like all the other characters, which is totally at odds with the rest of her characterisation, but it's just something you have to accept for this type of game. And of course it would have been super disappointing if she wasn't playable. I like her Sheikah Slate and Bike movesets, but I never liked the bow for too complicated for me to handle (and somehow the bow tutorial is like the hardest level in the game?)

In the golden ending of TotK the sages pledge their loyalty to Zelda, and the scene cuts to a flashback of the ancient sages doing the same for Rauru. Honestly I don't really get what they're trying to say with this; Zelda doesn't have any kind of character arc that would need to culminate in her becoming a leader or accepting help from others, and while the ancient version of this can be taken as everyone joining forces to fight evil together, at the end of TotK the world has already been saved so I don't see what the other races would get out of, I dunno, reinstating the monarchy that fell a hundred years ago? And the sages are already personal friends with Zelda anyway so the whole scene just feels weird.

Relationships

In addition to having a lot of development to herself as an individual, this Zelda also gets to have a lot of relationships with various NPCs that are worth mentioning.

As usual Link is among the most important relationships for Zelda. Zelda and Link obviously have the connection that they both have a predestined role in the Ganon thing, and the fact that they have such different starting points (Zelda struggles at her job while Link is pretty much already ready for his) gives them an interesting contrast. And when they eventually start getting along better they’re probably the only people who can understand each other’s situation properly.

Out of the Zelda and Link duos I've seen, I think this one has the most well defined relationship. For comparison SS Zelink comes second, and while I do like them a lot and I think the game makes it clear they care about each other as people, I don't think there's much else to their relationship than "childhood friends". Or like stuff that makes them unique among the many anime childhood friends. Meanwhile in BotW we get to know some actual specifics about their relationship (at least from Zelda's side), primarily about their shared fate. Zelda being jealous of Link's success at his job is a notable part of the story, and this comes up a lot. In her diary she describes how she is unhappy about the king appointing Link as her knight, how she is unnerved about how he is so silent and unreadable, and how she speculates about how he must despise her for her failures. And her jealousy doesn't just affect her own self esteem, but also impacts her behaviour when she lashes out at him for just doing his job.

Once Link saves Zelda from the Yiga clan, she becomes more friendly towards him, apologises and puts an effort in getting to know him more. I think it's a cute detail that the first thing she learns about him is how gluttonous he is. Eventually Link confides in him about the pressure he feels about his duty and Zelda presumably talks about her own fears (or at least she writes in her diary that she wants to and I assume she eventually did). So I really like that they get to connect at a very personal level and open up about their insecurities, and the game explicitly points out this connection.

I do have some issues with how the turning point of their relationship where Link saves her from the Yiga clan is executed. Like the reasons Zelda starts to see Link in a more positive light is because he did the one job he had as a bodyguard, like that comes as a surprise to her. On an intellectual level sure I can get that it's different for her to know that Link's job is to protect her from theoretical danger and actually experience that moment, but I don't think the story works in the moment. The scene itself is pretty weak, like Zelda writes in her diary how Link put himself in danger for her sake, but it's just two Yiga footsoldiers so as a player it's hard to relate to the idea that Link was at any kind of risk.

Age of Calamity changes Link's character significantly in that he finds the Master Sword during the game after he has already been appointed as Zelda's knight, and this also changes their relationship to a less interesting direction. As someone who is on track with fulfilling their role in the grand plan, Link still works as a foil to Zelda who struggles with hers, but all of this is depicted as Zelda's frustration at herself and all the the envy and animosity towards Link is missing. In general Link is pretty boring in AoC and most of what he could be able to contribute towards Zelda have been moved to Impa. But I do like how consistently he acts as her bodyguard in AoC, there are multiple scenes where he moves in front of her to protect her. Which of course is very appealing to someone who really likes the princess-and-knight trope.

Ultimately I think Link and Zelda make for a good couple not just because they have so much shared history together, but specifically because both are canonically kind of weird. Zelda makes people eat frogs, and Link is someone who eats rocks. I prefer to imagine that even before the Calamity Zelda could fully be herself around Link. And in TotK it's clear she has a high opinion of Link, considering how much she brags about him to Rauru (which was a super cute scene).

Since we've been taking note of any hand holding instances between Link and Zelda it should be noted that there's some of those here as well, though none of them are what I'd classify anywhere near romantic. As the bodyguard Link drags Zelda by the hand when they run away from enemies, and the ultimate hand holding game TotK also gives one hand holding moment to Zelink too (though Link holds hands in pretty much every important character in that game). And we also get a little princess carry moment at the end so that's cool.

While I don't think any of the games confirm that they are canonically a couple, I think there's a lot that points in that direction. Kass relays his teacher's observation that Zelda was in fact in love with Link, and while this is third-hand information and either Kass or the teacher could have misunderstood something, but that just feels like a really strange thing to put in the game especially when it isn't challenged in any way. Then there's the TotK house debate which has been discussed to death, so I'll just state the often listed things that Link can only sleep in the bed of this house, and if Zelda lived alone she wouldn't have as much need for a private study. And also the process of elimination: the game doesn't really give Link any other house where he would have lived during the years between BotW and TotK.

The previous Zelda dads have been pretty boring (either just generically nice or lacking any proper characterisation), so I welcome King Rhoam to this group. He's a pretty hated character for obvious reasons, but I like him because even though he was a terrible father, as a character he is interesting. The story also has more bite to it if everyone isn't just besties with everyone, and Zelda's distress feels more personal when her inability to awaken her powers doesn't affect just faceless masses and instead the constant reminder of her failures has a face. There are many scenes where he impedes or belittles her research or forbids it altogether, and in general the two appear to have a pretty formal and distant relationship.

Many in the audience want Rhoam's head on a stake for his horrid parenting, but I'd say that in canon Zelda is more willing for reconciliation, at least if AoC is anything to go by. According to his diary, Rhoam had been a strict father ever since the queen died (so Zelda was six) and there is little material on them actually having any positive interaction, but I figure there must have been something at least, or at least Zelda appears to value his approval. I do wonder how Zelda feels about her dad after the events of BotW since she probably got to read his diary and Link must have told him about the "old man".

In TotK Zelda gets more competent parental figures in Rauru and Sonia. It's a shame the game itself doesn't bring this up, but at least there is an interview that compares Zelda's parents to them. Through the power of magic and plot convenience they instantly sense that Zelda is trustworthy and become incredibly supportive of her. It really makes a huge difference for Zelda when she gets some actual guidance for unlocking her new magic powers, and unlike her BotW experience where she's constantly reminded of how necessary her contribution is to saving the world, this time she is told that this is not her fight and she is allowed to focus on her own issues. She eventually becomes a part of Rauru's inner circle and anti-Ganondorf team. I really like how Rauru treats Zelda, in that he consistently acts like the adult in the relationship and always remains supportive, but also doesn't baby her either and lets her make her own decisions.

While the other Beast Pilots primarily have a notable relationship with Link, Urbosa is more about Zelda as a mother figure or a "cool aunt" type. Urbosa is consistently supportive towards Zelda; she consoles her when her powers fail to awaken, was present to help when kid Zelda almost passed out from praying in cold water, puts her hand on her shoulder when she's stressed, and tries to do something about her strained relationship with Link. It's clear that the two are very close and go way back and Zelda has opened to her about her feelings. Zelda also acts more relaxed around Urbosa, like in the cute scene in Champion's ballad where they laugh together about having to put up a formal act in front of an audience.

Zelda also writes that she was surprised that Mipha was quick to learn to control her Divine Beast, whatever that means. Other than that Zelda doesn't share much of a specific relationship with Mipha, and Zelda's situation isn't contrasted with Mipha's at all even though both are princesses who are in a conflict with their king father. Even if Zelda does share personal and character-focused cutscenes with all champions, in general there's not much to say about her relationship towards the non-Urbosa Beast Pilots; while each of them has their own unique feelings about Zelda, from Zelda's side it's more just that she considers them her friends.

AoC Impa is in a similar boat. Impa's title in the game is "Royal advisor, loyal friend", and she indeed is included in many of Zelda's scenes where she's troubled over her lack of progress with her powers. Third-wheeling the Zelink from a shipper's perspective, but makes sense from a narrative perspective to have someone for Zelda to play off so she doesn't have to monologue for an entire cutscene since Link (or Terrako) doesn't talk as usual. So Impa gets to deliver some important pep talk to Zelda, so she can continue to trudge forward despite all her failures. Still this is mostly from Impa's side and I don't get a lot out of Zelda outside obviously seeing Impa as a friend.

Mind you even if I don't think Zelda's relationship with Impa or the Beast Pilots is particularly special, I'm not really complaining. Like there is effort to put them in character focused scenes and have them have some sort of connection with each other, and in almost any other LoZ game they would be a high point in Zelda's relationship list. It's just that the bar is way higher with this iteration of Zelda, so stuff like this becomes even worth mentioning.

The TotK sages have disappointingly little to do with Zelda, even though they should have known each other for years. We get nothing from Zelda's side towards any of them, and the sages are primarily concerned about the environmental disaster affecting their homes (which okay is fair) and Zelda is just a footnote in their story. Only Riju brings up Zelda being her close friend, and is the only one to refer to her as Zelda, while the other three use princess Zelda.

AoC gives Zelda her own companion character in Terrako, which I guess is fitting if you see her as the main character of the game. Unfortunately for me Terrako inhabits the character type that I categorically dislike and is my least favourite character of the franchise, but is still relevant enough that it warrants a mention here. And if Zelda has to have a mascot, making it a little robot is a good pick. We even get to see a flashback where kid Zelda builds Terrako, which of course ties well into her characterisation as a scientist. Through the story Terrako is present in Zelda's important moments encouraging her, and Terrako being (temporarily) destroyed just before the grand finale is the final big moment for Zelda where she repeats her resolve to win the war. And of course the true ending of AoC has Zelda set out on her own with just Terrako, which I guess helps to really sell her as the main character of her own life (compared to if she left with her whole friend group or a bodyguard).

Purah is brought up together with Zelda a little; apparently Zelda used to cover for her when her research got too explosive back before the Calamity, and Zelda took part in the ancient Sheikah technology research and writes in her diary how she thinks it's best not to try to argue with Purah. But since being a scholar is such a big part of Zelda's character, I really wish her relationship with Purah was more developed. She doesn't get much out of Mineru either other than a mention that she visited her and rode her construct.

We also get to know about how the public perception of Zelda, in BotW Rhoam tells about how there are rumours spreading about her inadequacy, but in TotK there are NPCs in every corner of Hyrule who have something nice to say about her. I think this is cute development, and I find it believable too given how much of the talk about her is how she actively goes around helping people.

[klausysworld]

you can make a fic for yandere klaus mikaelson, where he finds his match in mystic falls, and when he breaks his hybrid curse, he begins to hear a voice that turns out to be his wolf who has been asleep for all these centuries, and now that he is awake he wants his soul mate, much more so than klaus because klaus wanted to take it easy with her and woo her properly, but when his wolf started talking to him he was much more possessive and convinces him to just take her, eliminate her rivals and keep her protected at all costs and basically the wolf side of klaus is a yandere and klaus just does what he's told, and in the case of y/n since she was only human her feelings for klaus weren't that big, and when klaus The kidnapper was very upset, but she also did not have the courage to reject her soul mate, so she ends up giving in to Klaus, and is given the task of taming her wolf.

I’ll Try

Klaus’ wolf was estatic to finally have some control, to be let out of his cage and be free.

Three full days he had full control over Klaus’ body, running wild and tearing people apart as he'd always wanted to.

But then Klaus put him back away, and he barely put any effort in to please his wolf.

A thousand years they had both waited ro unlock this side of him and yet the only time his wolf was allowed out was to inject venom and cure it? It wasn't fair.

So then when Klaus layed eyes upon her, he couldn't even try to stop his wolf before it was forcing him towards her

She's ours, our soulmate, she needs us

Klaus was going mad, he was sure of it. Psychotic is one thing, voices are another

His feet took him straight to her. She was gorgeous, perfectally innocent and dainty. The wolf was already trying to latch onto her. Klaus endednup walking right into her knocking her backwards and shootimg his arms out to catch her as she let out a yelp from impact.

He expected her to yell or be salty, he had quite literally ran into her, rather roughly at that, but instead she immediately went into apologies

“I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking where i was going-“ she began

“No no, it was my fault, i was in rush, forgive me“ he muttered, almosg awestruck as he saw her up close. Each tiny detail of her face came together flawlessly and he itched to trace her features.

We need to take her with us, just grab her, she needs to be indoors and safe now

Klaus quickly pushed the words away and unwrapped his arms from her, setting her back down on her feet and taking a small step back.

“so where are you going in such a rush?“ she asked and he blinked in confusion

“what?“

“you said you were in a rush? Do you need to be somewhere? I can drive you?“ she offered

Say yes.

“I'm heading home actually and it's probably out of your way, but thank you“ he managed to get the words out while he mind was clouded with images of her. Holding her, touching her, marrying her, fucking her, having children with her, if was overwhelming and he wasn't sure what to do.

“okay, welk i hope you get there safely“ she told him before walking off

You let her go, it's fine, just fine, we'll get her next time the wolf convinced but Niklaus was only focused on her.

Over the next few days Klaus become further acquainted with his wolf. His wolf was persistent in getting their mate, saying they needed her and that there were too many dangers for her out in the world.

Klaus argued they leave her be and not ruin her by dragging her into the supernatural world, to take things slow and gently introduce her.

They compromised and decided that Klaus would court her and if she didn't take to him then he had to let his wolf out to play.

And so Klaus began planning

He tried his best to woo her, they went on several dates and he always brought her flowers and other little gifts to make her smile but then he noticed that other men were still trying to get with her, asking her out and also giving her roses. Thankfully he had asked her ro be exclusive and she agreed but it didn't stop his wolf from going mental

What aren't you seeing? Can't you see how they look at her? You need to take her before someone else does. There's only so many times you can risk this

It didn't help when his wolf planted dreams and images of their beloved with another man, with their own family and she moaned a name that wasn't his.

It was when Klaus had to save her from a disgrace of human being, they had pulled her to an alleyway attempting to do god knows what, Klaus managed fo get to her in time, throwing the man off and keeping her close as she sobbed into his chest. That night while she was tucked up in his bed, his wolf rose to the surface, tearing the person who dare lay a finger on her to pieces.

We can't have this happen again, it isn't safe in this world, she needs to be hidden, taken care of and tended to

And this time Klaus couldn't argue and son instead of waking up in Klaus’ bed where she fell asleep, she woke in what looked like a cell. Her breathing became shallow as she began ro panic, fear written across her face as she screamed for someone to let her out

“my love...please, you must calm down, this is temporary until i can get your room decorated and secure.“ klaus attemoted to calm her but she scrambled away from him in tears.

Eventually she fell asleep in Klaus’ arms after he held her until she grew roo exhausted to kick and scream at him. His wolf grew impatient with her unwillingness

Just tell her we're soulmates, she cannot reject us, it would harm her more than anyone else

After a few days Klaus had her in a nicer room, soft calming colours decorating it, a large comfy bed, bookshelves and a drawing area. There were flowers in vases on the window sills. The windows were blurred and no matter how hard she bashed against them, they would never open or break.

And once she was some what settled he began to explain their...bond...and what it meant witjin the supernatural community. He told her of his wolf and how much he cared for her, loved her even.

She wasn't sure how she was supposed to respond, she didn't feel bond anywhere near as much as he did and was frightened of his wolf.

And when she asked him to prove what he was, she certainly wasn't expecting to watch in horror as each of his bones snapped out of place to form a wolf three times the size of any wolf she had ever seen.

She stayed entirely still as he brushed up against her all over, licking all up her neck making her heart rapidly smack against her ribs in fear. The wolf didn’t care for her fear, he was just happy to have her and to be in control.

He rubbed his scent all over her, pushing his snout everywhere he could and she did not once protest, her body shaking as she held her breath. The wolf pulled her to the bed by her sleeve and curled up around her, waiting patiently for her to fall asleep so that he could hold her lovingly without her shaking and sniffling.

When she woke Klaus was back in his human form, he had gotten changed to not frighten her. He held her gently as she cried to him

“I’m sorry sweetheart, it’s going to be okay” he whispered convincing both her and himself

“I just don’t understand” she whimpered

“I know, but it’s going to get better, you just need to try, please love, just try” he pleaded and she nodded

“I’ll try”

And at that moment both Klaus and his wolf knew, she was to never leave him or his hold.

[kindredtarot]

❛❛What you need to balance right now?❜❜

› ♡˖°꒰ Pick a pile

✦; Pile : 1 ˎˊ˗❞

6 of swords, 10 of pentacles, 7 of stones, queen of arrows, 2 of cups.

“I'm just really fuckin' selfish and really fuckin' lost. But someone loved me, someone fucking loved me. Someone fucking loved me and I fuckin' loved them too. Goddamn it, I was worth something, I fuckin' learned something. I had my cake (I ate it, it ate me too and, God, no)” — Feel Better by Penelope Scott

You need to balance your timely actions and patience. It looks like you are transitioning to a new stage in your life because you want to advance and achieve what you want. Are you choosing to leave behind old relationships? Probably a hard decision emotionally, but something you felt you had to do to protect yourself. “Can’t heal in the same environment that wounds me”. You want stability, finally. Maybe you want it before but insisted to try having it with people that wouldn’t give it to you. But now you are making steps towards it, starting with the choice to move on. You want to have a stable foundation financially and/or with your family, a place that you can actually call home and mot having to worry about having to protect yourself and your feelings 24/7. And you can get it, you just need to have patience with your healing journey. 

You are going in the right direction. I know leaving people that you really cared about hurts and it might take some months or a year, but continue to take care of yourself, physically, emotionally, and mentally. It’s okay to let your mind remember and miss past moments sometimes, and to cry your heart out. Blocking those things would just make it harder in the long run, and you might already know that deep down. Resting and not doing nothing doesn’t mean your are giving up, take your time to get ready to continue towards what you want. Taking care of yourself will clear your mind and would help you communicate better and making better decisions towards your relationships with others and your possessions/money. I can see your relationships improving, with yourself and others, actual soul-touching connections. Maybe you always wanted a soul family, a group of friends that were like family or a healthy family life, whatever it was, I can see this area of your life improving and beautifully too. Just take priority and improve your relationship with yourself first and foremost, so you are ready with strong boundaries and understanding of what you truly want to start deep connections with others too.

✦; Pile : 2 ˎˊ˗❞

page of wands, 3 of pentacles, death, the tower, queen of pentacles, 3 of wands in reverse.

“Do you ever see someone and think "Wow, they got lucky", the craftsmanship of their bones, their brain, and their body. When I look into the mirror for too long it hurts, they don't track how many steps it takes to burn off dessert. Do you ever see someone and think "Wow, they got lucky". I'll let 'em take accountability. For everything that's wrong with me. Can't hold myself responsible. So I'll blame the metaphysical. If Jesus died for all our sins. He left one behind, the body I'm in. Same hands that made the moon and the stars. Got carpal tunnel and forgot some parts” — God must hate me by Catie Turner

You need to balance how you view others vs yourself. You might put people in a pedestal and put yourself down unconsciously. You seem to be someone with so many ideas and plans, wild imagination! (You might be an artist). Someone that sees the ���impossible” and is sure it could become possible! A really exciting and active person, whether that’s physically or mentally. You might like working in group or just admire people. They seems really interesting, so many new perspective. And they are talented too, in their own way. Maybe your achievements don’t seem as valuable to you just because you are admiring other people that seem to just have everything else you want. You have a lot too, in your life you were resilient. You sometimes might think you are giving up too easily but you are resilient. You are still going, aren’t you? Still trying or planning to get better and get to your goals. Don’t forget to look back to your past to realize how far you’ve come, how much you had learned. Just because all the things you had achieve aren’t as visible to others like what you see outside of yourself, doesn’t mean they don’t exist or are less. 

Others seems so cool to you, and forget you are cool too. Do you have a lot of unfinished projects? So many ideas but maybe don’t fully follow through with them. And others seem to have their shit together already, finishing what they started. Instead of discouraging yourself, try observing the things you admire from those people and take what could help you keep going. Maybe you have problems with planning your projects or stay stuck on just planning instead of actually starting them. This unbalance in your views of others and yourself has to “die” to start building something better that would work for you. It won’t be easy to fix something that got stuck so deep in your subconscious but it is possible! It would make you feel really frustrated or confuse at the start, because a  lot of beliefs that you had would be breaking and making you rethinks them and what you are doing with your actions. And that’s okay! Because you would understand yourself better and see you for who you truly are. A really cool creative person. You would nourishing more your creative mind, projects, and collaborations with people. You would start to work as a team, truly this time, because you would finally see yourself just as valuable as those who you admire are. And you would also go through your projects, because you would commit to them now. I can see you caring so much more about your projects in a practical way, and growing success and financial stability because of it. You might have setbacks after committing with your projects because you don’t really know how to advance with them, but those setbacks are gonna be temporary, so have patience with yourself. Every mistakes teaches a lesson, remember them for any future obstacle. And remember to ask for help when you need it too!

✦; Pile : 3 ˎˊ˗❞

5 of swords, ace of wands, 4 of cups, ace of pentacles, 10 of swords.

“Spider-boy, king of thieves. Weave your little webs of opacity. My pennies made your crown. Trick me once, trick me twice. Don't you know that cash ain't the only price? It's coming back around. And I keep my side of the street clean. You wouldn't know what I mean. 'Cause karma is my boyfriend. Karma is a god. Karma is the breeze in my hair on the weekend. Karma's a relaxing thought. Aren't you envious that for you it's not? Sweet like honey, karma is a cat. Purring in my lap 'cause it loves me. Flexing like a goddamn acrobat. Me and karma vibe like that” — Karma by Taylor Swift

You need to balance your thoughts, desires, and actions. You have to stop acting with your ego. Stop playing with your luck… I feel like you could have so many things but you might be impulsive and make moves that you know you shouldn’t be doing because they aren’t planned or because it might be tripping someone else and not even getting you nothing valuable at the end of it. You might be a little stubborn about this, maybe prefer not to follow “rules” or are scare of doing so because you think it might not work for you? Instead of making risky decision that barely give you anything or sometimes nothing at all. Try taking your time planning and making decision that even if they succeed or not, they would still level you up. 

You have so much potential and a vision as well. But you can’t just go about it without planning nothing at all! Like trying to make a spark into a fire. You need to blow towards the spark correctly, if you don’t, you lose it and you don’t get the fire. And then your motivation is left on the cold. I understand the frustration, but don’t forget about what you have already. You can try to create a fire in the first place because you have the materials already. And you might receive a lot of opportunities that could help you but you don’t take them seriously because they aren’t up to your expectations or because you rush into them without thinking in what ways they could be helpful to you. Whatever it is, you are self sabotaging. You could help yourself up towards what you wants or you could destroy everything on your way. You actions are part of you, so think them through. You are constantly stabbing yourself with fear. Getting overwhelm and falling from exhaustion. Remember, the only thing that you can control is your actions and reactions. So don’t give power to fear and anxiety. Once you release that, you can hold your own power yourself and utilize it to make the right decisions. On choosing what you want, how you want it and how you are going to get it.

Don’t be scare of your potential and stop unleashing your decisions on others. karma might comeback later on to bite you in the back, but play your cards right and it could be your biggest helper! Just keep going and focus on doing better. 

[gingergofastboatsmojito]

OK, I'm ready to discuss the C person and a much more sinister subplot I think many might have actually eaten right outta Storer's hand

What if what Storer is doing with this MPDG is not just creating a diversion from the dish he's really getting ready to serve, but also and simultaneously a huge focus group experiment?

Like, testing the waters, YK?

Plan A: Open the game so Sydcarmy is not the only ship adrift on this ocean, even though Sydcarmy is indeed the endgame ship.

Plan B: If it really works out, Syd will actually be relagated as "the one who got away" → The Lalaland move I fear soooo much.

What if he's trying to shove her down our throats to see if we end up accepting her bc we see "happy-smiley Carmy" with her in those flashbacks and we see "The wild bear" roaring at Syd half the time. So we end up begging him to get Syd outta there ASAP and get C and Carmy back together so they all win and he gets to decide what characters we can ship or not after fucking gaslighting us for years?!?!

What if he's applying reverse psychology on the fandom as a mere power move? Just to see if he can get away with it.

And of course, to cover his tracks he gives Syd a talented, blond chef, all covered in tattoos who works at the restaurant she had always wanted to work at, so we don't fight back that hard.

What if this whole C thing we were forced to see just saw in S3 was a trap all along and many fell right into it?

Is it too delulu? IDK.

[broodwolf221]

very stressed again so I'm just gonna talk about solas bc he's my comfort blorbo atm

one quick clarification: I tend to use elven to describe modern elves and elvhen to describe ancient elves. it's just smth I started doing a while back and now it's habit.

I've already talked abt his personality/behavior and my theories on his distant past. so now I wanna talk about his actions.

joined the inquisition

even with lowest approval won't leave the inquisition

kept the inquisitor alive

helped seal the rifts/breach

painted the inquisitor's actions

helped kill corypheus

"killed" mythal

exposed the qunari plot

spoke to the inquisitor at the end of trespasser

now to dig into these.

joined the inquisition

this one is pretty wild. according to his conversation in trespasser, he woke a year before the conclave. one year. afaik it's unclear when he drew the veil vs. when he slept, but what is clear is that he woke up and had only a year to begin acclimating to a wildly different world, one he held significant guilt over causing to form. in this short time, he manages to acclimate enough to gain agents and find out about corypheus, someone he feels he can use. and solas wouldn't mourn corypheus' death, nor would the world, so it must have seemed such a perfect solution

then it obviously goes all to shit. and solas is too weak to take charge of the situation and remedy it on his own - besides which, his anchor is now attached to someone else. so what does he do? well aware that this world hates and fears both "apostates" (that must have been a strange revelation for him, considering how elvhen culture lauded mages) and elves, he nonetheless turns himself in and surrenders his staff

he decides to help. and no, it's not selfless - he needs the anchor. but there's so much more to it than that. he wants to help ease the harm he's inadvertently caused, the damage corypheus wrought. he's not trying to "save" the world, exactly, but he is trying to give it peace while he works to restore the world to what he feels (maybe rightly!) it should be. it's selfish. it's selfless. it's kind. it's deceitful. essentially: like him, it is nuanced.

but still, pretty wild that an elvhen apostate joins the human chantry's arm (and eventual army) of change

won't leave the inquisition

the reasoning here is fairly self-evident. he needs the anchor, and he wants to help. the inquisition is his sole means to achieve both goals. but it's still worth noting that even if he absolutely hates the inquisitor, he'll stay on as a core part of the inquisition right up to the bitter end.

and it's interesting bc he doesn't actually have to. he could have made sure the inquisitor wouldn't die and taught them how to seal rifts, then left. or he could have left after the breach was sealed. the inquisitor - and by extension, the anchor - would NOT be hard for him to find, because everyone and their dog knows where the inquisitor is at all times. also, at this point I'm not sure if he knows he'll need the anchor.

further, he could "leave" but continue to spy, including through the fade. but instead he stays right there. he leads the inquisition to skyhold. he involves himself at a fundamental level. it's interesting. he didn't have to.

does he get dragged in despite himself? does he grow attached to the rest of the inquisition, or its goals, even as he tries to hang onto the comforting lie that these people are so much less-then the people he knew? does he feel obligated to help right the harm he caused, their drawn out suffering harder to bear than their sudden cessation?

kept the inquisitor alive

I have to assume there's a reason for this, a reason he couldn't just take the anchor from them while they slept. likely it was because he was still too weak to remove it, although that seems a little strange - what was he planning to do once corypheus died opening his orb? but given the potential nature of the inquisitor, including many non-mage options and including dwarven options who are cut off from the fade itself, it stands to reason that getting the anchor placed by touching the opened orb may be much easier than removing the anchor, even prior to it being used.

perhaps he could have removed it, but was worried the inquisition would kill him. early on, how was he to know that cassandra's bark was so often worse than her bite? and it's entirely possible that she might have killed him if the inquisitor had died under his watch, particularly if the anchor was "mysteriously" removed at the same time.

I also imagine that he genuinely didn't know if the anchor would function if he just... cut their arm off and ran with it. but at the same time, I assume he was constantly monitored so that probably wasn't much of an option

helped seal the rifts/breach

couple of core reasons for this, I think: first, he genuinely wants to help. the people of thedas are terrified and at risk; so too are the spirits from the fade who are being drawn into the waking world against their will, which may well be a stronger impetus for him to work on sealing them. second, I have a theory that he won't be able to, or fears he won't be able to, tear down the veil in one with all these rifts.

rifts are tears in the boundary, right? so if he tried to pull the veil down around them, what's to stop the veil from catching against the rifts and keeping these boundaries in existence? like... trying to remove a sticker when parts have been nailed in. not only will the parts under the nail remain, but whole strips might be left behind. what would that create?

and the thing is, everything he's attempting and considering is so highly theoretical. maybe it wouldn't work like that at all. maybe it'd be fine. maybe it'd be worse. he doesn't know! but it feels safe to assume that, given his character, he'd want to proceed in the safest way possible with the best likelihood of a good outcome. he's methodical that way.

painted the inquisitor's actions

this one gets me just like it gets everyone. there's so much to it... he's using an ancient elvhen technique to memorialize the decisions of today's holy order and its leader. he's creating frescoes which are meant to last, and he doesn't know if they will. he's creating meaning in the moment, for the inquisition itself, and possibly for the future, even a future where everyone he knows is gone, killed through his actions.

it's a way to honor them. it's a headstone. it's a history. it's a gift. it's art. it's effort he doesn't need to expend. it's the closest he can come to an apology.

helped kill corypheus

of course, he's always wanted corypheus to die, so in that sense this really isn't that surprising. and in game corypheus can sometimes feel ridiculously easy to kill. but the fact is, corypheus is perceived as one of if not the single greatest threat they have to face.

and solas helps face him.

what if he died? what if he was killed? it's wild that someone who's so determined to change the world constantly puts himself at such risk, but it's part of both his nature and the means of meeting his goals. it's necessary. but is it necessary for him to face corypheus?

the time has come, the inquisitor and inquisition are prepared.

why doesn't he leave? come back after the battle and reclaim his orb? yes, the inquisitor broke it, but I don't think solas even recognizes that as a possibility. to him, the orb would have been there. and, bonus, maybe the inquisition is so damaged in the battle that they'll struggle to pursue him. if he has the orb, or thinks he would have it, he wouldn't necessarily need to protect the inquisitor any longer, because why have the anchor when he has the orb? unless of course its power was transferred to the anchor, which is a distinct possibility, but in that case... why mourn the orb so?

I think that he at least believed the orb could create another anchor. so losing it meant he needed to possess the anchor currently in existence. but again: he went into this battle thinking orb and anchor alike would exist at the end. why risk it? why not just dart in and recover what he needs?

he cares about them. even if he hates the inquisitor, he cares about the people of this world. he won't turn his back on the inquisition in their hour of need, even if he risks death

"killed" mythal

I've given this so much thought. I understand why he did it, to a point, but at the same time... it's always put me at a loss. he sealed the evanuris away because they killed mythal. he killed her to take her power, presumably a necessity after the loss of his orb in order to reclaim the anchor. and I do agree that she may very well still be alive, either entirely or in a way. I'm not sure if he's aware of that, though.

but it's all very complicated. he knows he should be the one punished - these are his sins he's trying to right, for the people (elvhen? spirits? everyone? including but probably not primarily dwarves? I've seen so many takes on this and it's always fascinating)

so. he takes something of mythal, very possibly believing he's killing her, and possibly actually killing her, in order to restore the world to what it used to be. he doesn't want to do this. it's utterly tragic and horrifying at once when you see it the first time (and, well, every time after if you're me). it's painful. but he does it.

he's willing to shoulder so much pain. loneliness, too, because mythal is presumably the only one left from his time. he destroys his sole connection to his past in order to right his mistakes. putting aside the issue of whether he's right or not, that is a monumental burden to bear.

he endures. he always endures. how horrible to always endure.

exposed the qunari plot

because I've discussed this previously I won't dig too deep into it, but the fact is 1) he didn't have to do this, 2) doing this actively makes it easier for the inquisition to pursue him, 3) doing this might actually make it easier in a way for the qunari to focus on strengthening the veil, and 4) apparently, he did it. not an agent. he dragged the qunari into the winter palace.

why? why risk himself like that? to get a glance at those he left behind? did he rush through the motions and disappear, or did he linger? did he look at them and consider what more he would have to endure?

spoke to the inquisitor at the end of trespasser

he needed the anchor, yes. but did he need to answer the inquisitor's questions, soothe their inevitable curiosity? absolutely not. he could have kept lying. it would have been smarter to keep lying. why, why tell them who he is, why let the entire inquisition know?

he already gave them a clear path to chasing him down and possibly stopping him. now he's telling them his basic plan? sure, he spares the details, but what does that really preserve?

and the thing is, even if he absolutely hates the inquisitor, he still tells them the basics. the way he does it is... genuinely so funny and it cheers me up inordinately he is so sassy about it but that's not important. what is important is that he even tells someone he loathes who and what he is and what his basic plan is.

why not just leave? "the anchor is killing you and it's mine, i'll take it back. goodbye." why not just that?

it's hard for me to believe it's anything other than: he wants to be stopped. a part of him wants so, so badly to be stopped. the same part that wanted to tell a romanced inquisitor the truth in the crestwood scene. the same part that keeps giving all these hints and answering questions sincerely even when it makes people wonder about him. the same part that only lies by ommission.

the part that is lonely and wanting and cares.

not only is he fundamentally a kind, caring man who wants to minimize the harm he does, not only does he value and want to reward curiosity, but he wants to be stopped. and the inquisitor/inquisition is about the only force in the world that can stop him, directly or indirectly.

they know him. he knows them. and while it's implied that the inquisition/inquisitor can't stop him directly because of this familiarity, they are the ones who find new forces to array against him. if he'd just lied and left, that wouldn't be a possibility.

he made himself an enemy. he could've had a clear playing field and all the tools he needed: instead, a force at his back.