#i have another month until i can go to the dentist

[halfdeadwallfly]

wondering how long it will be before the bit of the back of my mouth that my wisdom teeth keep working on just falls off entirely

[territorial-utopia]

Huzzah! It's birthday time! I'm slowly accumulating more and more things I like (latest additions this vest I made and a travel typewriter! Still need to fix the latter one though)

Sure has been a year.

[bunnihearted]

.

[soursturniolo]

Scare • Matt Sturniolo

pairing: matt sturniolo/fem!reader

summary: matt and you handle a pregnancy scare.

tags: angst and then fluff, with some humor sprinkled in. happy ending.

tw: light discussion of periods and pregnancy

It feels like my heart stops as I look at the calendar on my phone.

9 days late. And I’m never late.

I noticed this morning that my box of tampons still sat in the cabinet, unopened, in Matt and I’s shared bathroom. I hadn’t thought anything of it, until I opened my calendar to see when my next dentist appointment is.

I swallow dryly as I lock my phone and slip it back into my pocket, dropping down to sit on Matt and I’s bed. All I can think about is that damn calendar. 9 days late. 9 whole days. One or two days is normal I guess, but nine entire days?

I can feel my thoughts spiraling already. Matt and I are safe. I’m on a good birth control and we use condoms often. But even those aren’t foolproof. I do remember forgetting my pill twice this month.

Oh god. What if I’m pregnant? I’m not ready for a kid right now.

Oh god, and Matt. Matt isn’t ready either. With his career and plans with his brothers there’s no way this could even work right now. It would ruin everything. I feel tears of worry and anxiety fill my eyes and begin to drop down my cheeks.

My thoughts just continue to spiral and spiral, until I feel the bed dip next to me. I turn to see Nick, who had stayed behind with me while Matt and Chris went out to pick up some groceries.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” He asks concerned, his arm wrapping around my shoulder, pulling me into a side hug as we sat together.

I open my mouth to speak as my eyes meet his, but all that comes out is a sob. My hand moves to cover my mouth as more sobs follow. Nicks face creases in worry as his other arm wraps around me, pulling me into a hug as he rubs my back soothingly.

“Deep breaths, babe. Whatever it is, it’ll be okay,” he tells me, making me jerk back as I shake my head.

“No it won’t! He’s going to hate me!” I cry.

“If you’re talking about Matt, that kid could never hate you,” Nick tells me, voice calm and reassuring.

“I don’t know, Nick,” I laugh without humor, “this might.”

“Did you cheat?” Nick asks face calm, but apprehensive.

“No! God no,” I immediately answer.

Nick gives a small smile at the quick response.

“Okay, highly doubted it when I asked anyway,” he laughs, “but I don’t know what else could have you so upset thinking he’s going to hate you. You can talk to me, I want to help. What’s wrong?” He asks again.

I sigh. Nicks my best friend. He’s how I met Matt in the first place. I really wanted to just talk to Matt about this first, but with LA traffic and all Matt probably won’t be back for another hour. I don’t think I can survive another hour keeping this all bottled up.

“Nick, it’s bad,” I begin, voice shaken.

“I don’t care how bad, I’m here,” he immediately responds.

I take a deep breath.

“I’m late.” I state.

If this wasn’t so serious, Nicks reaction would have been funny. He stares at me blankly for a moment, before his head cocks to the side a bit in confusion.

“Like, to an appointment?” He asks, lost.

“No, Nick,” I sigh, shaking my head, “my period is late” the last part comes out like a whisper.

Once Nick connects the dots his jaw drops open a bit in surprise, confirming my feelings.

“See! It’s so bad, Nick, this is so bad!” I yell, jumping up from the bed and beginning to nervously pace in front of where Nick sits, still shocked.

“N-no, it’s not bad!” He stutters as he watches me with wide eyes.

I stop pacing and just look at him.

“Really? Not bad? Your jaw dropped open like that because you were trying to catch a fly, then?” I ask sarcastically.

“Listen, I just got confronted with the fact that my best friend and brother fuck, I needed a second,” he defends, hands up.

“Nick, we’ve been dating a year. We dont go to bed and play clash of clans together,” I tell him, making him roll is eyes.

“I know! I know but I also don’t think about it and now we kinda have to think about it and I don’t like it!” Nick exclaims.

“Don’t think about it!” I yell back.

We pause for a minute, staring at each other before we both crack smiles at how ridiculous this has become. We laugh and I return to sitting next to him. Nick wraps his arm around my shoulder again and rests his head against mine.

“So, how late are we talking?” He asks, getting back to the important point.

“9 days,” I whisper.

“Okay. Not horrible. Could be later,” he says, nodding. I nod too. A moment of silence passes as I nervously pick at my nails and Nick stares at the wall, thinking.

“Well, I think we know what we gotta do.” He says, softly.

I turn to him, knowing too.

“Let me call Matt, he should still be at the store with Chris. They can pick up a test,” Nick says. I take another shaky breath before nodding in agreement. I get my phone out and go to Matt’s contact, dialing his number before handing my phone to Nick.

“Hey baby,” Matt’s voice comes through the speaker softly.

“Hey, it’s Nick,” Nick says, earning a confused noise from Matt.

“Nick? Why do you have her phone? Is she okay?” He asks quickly, his concern making me smile softly despite the stressful situation.

“Um,” Nick pauses, which only worries Matt further.

“‘Um’, isn’t a good answer when a guy asks about his girlfriend, Nick,” Matt responds quickly.

“Sorry, she’s okay, but we need you to pick up something else for her while you’re at the store,” Nick says.

“Okay, what?” Matt asks.

Nick looks at me, encouraging me to speak. I take a breath before taking the phone out of Nicks hands, taking it off speaker and holding it to my ear.

“I need a pregnancy test,” I tell him softly.

I cringe as there’s a moment of silence on the other end of the line.

“Okay, I can grab that. Do you need anything else, sweetheart?” He asks softly. I smile again despite the tears I can feel coming again.

“No, that’s it,” I whisper.

“Okay, we’ll be back soon, I love you,” he tells me.

“Love you too” I say back before hanging up.

Nick and I move downstairs, where he puts on a movie for us to distract us while we wait. I let myself be pulled into its predictable plot line as we wait for Matt and Chris to come home.

We both are startled out of our focus on the movie when we hear the front door unlock, followed by it opening to reveal Matt coming in with a mostly empty plastic bag in his hand, while Chris came in carrying the other groceries. Nick moves to help Chris and grabs some of the heavier bags from him, both of them walking to the kitchen while Matt walks over to me.

I stand as he meets me by the couch. He looks surprisingly calm, while meanwhile I feel like my insides are shaking with the anxiety I’m feeling right now. He gives me a small smile before wrapping me in his arms. I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding as I relax into his arms, resting my head against his chest. He gives me a gentle squeeze as I feel him press a kiss to my head.

“Let’s head to my room, baby,” he whispers, pulling back from the hug and grabbing my hand to lead me that way. Once in his room, he hands me the bag with the pregnancy test in it before sitting on his bed. Before walking to our bathroom, I pause.

“Matt, I need to know what this will mean,” I tell him.

He gives a small smile and holds his hand out to me. I walk over and grab it. He gives my hand a gentle squeeze, before bringing it up to lips to give it a kiss.

“We’ll do it together. Whatever it is. Sure, I thought kids would be later. But, if now is the time, now is the time. I think I’d be more freaked if this was with some random girl. But with you? I know whatever happens, we will be just fine,” he tells me, before giving the back of my hand another kiss.

“You promise?” I ask.

“I swear,” he tells me.

I smile and nod, before heading to the bathroom. The test is quick and easy, and I’m soon done. I leave the test on the bathroom counter, set my timer for fifteen minutes, and come back out to sit next to Matt on our bed. I rest my head on his shoulder as Matt wraps his arm around me. We just quietly sit, both of us lost in our thoughts as we wait, only to be shaken out of our trances by my phone loudly going off.

I sigh as I stand and walk back to the bathroom to grab the test. I pick it up, careful to not flip it over to show the result, and walk back out to Matt. I stop in front of him. He gives me another reassuring smile as his hands come up to rest on my hips.

“Ready?” I ask, voice cracking.

“Yeah, baby,” he says.

I take a deep breath, knowing this small test in my hand could change everything for the both of us. But I look at Matt, looking up at me with so much warmth and comfort in his eyes, and it’s not so scary anymore.

I flip the test over, both of our eyes moving to see the result.

Negative.

“It’s negative!” I say, laughing. He smiles too, standing and pulling me into a tight hug. We both rock back and forth as we hug, feeling relief. We pull back from the hug and Matt kisses me softly. We both smile into the kiss.

After we part, we walk hand in hand out to the living room where Chris and Nick both sit. They both give us smiles when we walk in.

“So, are we going to be uncles?!” Chris yells, practically bouncing on the couch in excitement.

Matt rolls his eyes, shaking his head while I laugh.

“No, it’s negative. My periods just late, that’s all. It happens sometimes,” I tell them, almost feeling bad when Chris pouts a bit.

We spend the rest of the night laughing and watching movies together, Matt holding me snug in his arms. That night when we go to bed, Matt says something that surprises me.

“Is it bad that I was just a little disappointed?” He asks me softly.

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“Well, when you first called and asked for the test I was freaking out on the inside. But then I talked to Chris a bit and the whole drive home I thought about it. And then I thought about a little us, a mix of you and me. And as life changing as a kid right now would be, I got excited,” he says, voice soft and quiet.

I smile, leaning in to press my lips softly against Matt’s.

“We’ll have a little us someday, just not quite yet.” I tell him.

“You promise?” He asks.

“I swear.”

[yuff7e]

heyy i was hoping you could hear me out on this female reader x bakugo fic request. this might sound so weird but pls stay w me. when u give a guy head it can bruise the back of ur throat. (obviously isn’t perm) and dentists can actually tell and see the bruising. so i’ve jus been thinking about going to a dental appointment with Bakugo the next day after giving him that head and the dentist being able to tell and lowkey teasing about it. how would bakugo react lol. thanks!!!!

♬ ₊˚. dental appts w bakugo katsuki !! .🎧⋆✧ sfw / fluff / light mentions of nsfw / mentions of mouth poking

female reader

hi anon !! this is such a funny request i HAD to do this !!! i literally giggled when i read it :3 that’s so silly i bet he’d be so flustered, enjoy <3

the cuties song -> www.spotify.com (LMFAOO)

your boyfriend, katsuki, was driving you to your dental appointment today. you two were doing the usual, listening to music and talking occasionally as you gaze out the window. you usually don’t like going to the dentist, but you knew you had to get a few things checked eventually.

once katsuki pulled into the parking lot, you grabbed your purse and your phone and hopped out of his car - fixing your hair in the window once you shut the door. “let’s go!” katsuki shouts, you huff - moving another strand of hair into place and catching up to him.

“you look fine, baby.” he grumbles, pulling your hand into his - you shoot him a quick smile before walking in the doors. once you’re inside katsuki speaks to the receptionist at the counter and lends her your information as you look around, you haven’t been to the dentist in forever.

eventually you two sit down, katsuki crosses a calf over his knee and puts his arm around you - watching the kids fondly and glaring at the men that walked past and looked at you. you pull out your small compact mirror and fix your hair once more, earning a small chuckle from katsuki.

“what?” “nothin’ you’re just cute..” a pink hue frames your cheeks and you look back into the tiny mirror, suddenly the door entering the dentists office calls out your name and you both stand up - following the woman into the room where the dentist is at.

“hello ms.[last name], take a seat.” the dentist greets you kindly and you sit, katsuki sitting in the other chair in the room. the dentist looks at your records and assures everything is fine with your teeth and that they just want to do a short checkup to double check that everything is normal.

you sit back once you hand katsuki your purse and essentials, opening your mouth for the dentist to examine. as he’s poking around in your mouth he stops for a second and gives you a look, you look back at him quizzically and he just chuckles - glancing at katsuki as well.

“what? is there somethin’ wrong?” katsuki questions, sitting up in the chair. the dentist tells him there’s nothing wrong, but that there seems to be some.. bruising, in the back of your mouth. katsuki coughs at his confession and you glance between katsuki and the dentist, suddenly - you start giggling. your face has turned a light shade of pink that the dentist points out, which just turns the hue darker as the dentist continues the teasing.

katsuki stares at the dentist with wide eyes and sits back in the chair, clearly embarrassed. “it’s quite alright, it doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong. it’s just always funny to notice and tease the patients about, don’t worry - this is not an uncommon thing.” he speaks as he clicks his mouse against the mousepad, eventually he spins back around in his chair toward you and tells you that everything is fine and that you don’t have to come back until a few months pass.

you thank him and grab your things from katsuki, before you two could walk out the dentist stops you - “make sure to not get another bruise, now.” katsuki stops dead in his tracks, turning to look at the dentist “wh—- hey!” before he could continue you place a hand on his chest and push him out, “sorry, and yes sir - i won’t.”

the dentist smiles at you both fondly as you walk out, katsuki keeping a tight grip on your waist as you make it to his car. before you open the car door you place a hand on your forehead, giggling breathlessly to yourself - “oh my, that was so embarrassing.” “yeah it sure fuckin’ was, why’d he care so much anyway?” katsuki mumbles to himself as he gets in the car.

you get in as well and place a hand on his arm, “don’t worry, now that we know in advance we’ll do something else before going to the dentist.” you flutter your eyelashes at him and he just gives you a “really?” look. you laugh at his silent response and he puts the car in reverse, revving loudly before backing out and speeding off.

—

yay !! this was actually so fun to write and super easy !! thanks for the amazing and silly request !! i love requests like these :)

REQUESTS : OPEN

[ckret2]

Chapter 33 of human Bill is still the Mystery Shack's prisoner:

Stan takes Bill to get fillings from a creepy dentist in the back of a white van. And also they're handcuffed together the whole time.

Hijinks ensue.

Stan was startled from reading the paper by a shrill up-and-down whistle. Bill trotted into the kitchen, his voice a singsong lilt: "Incoming!"

Stan lowered the paper to glare at Bill. "Still doing that, are you?"

"Of course! I'd hate to scare you." Bill took the chair across the kitchen table from Stan. "Gooood morni—"

"Go away." Stan determinedly returned his attention to an article about the deathball arena construction.

Bill laughed. "You're funny. Anyway!" He noted Stan's plate of eggs and salsa was hidden behind his newspaper, and quietly slid the plate across the table as he spoke. "I need you to do me the teensy, tiniest little favor—"

"Nope."

"Take me to your dentist."

"No." Stan didn't even lower his newspaper. "The last time I took you anywhere, you almost made my niece cry, my brother left a Shopliftaholics Anonymous flier on my bed, and all I got out of it was a crummy ring. You wanna go somewhere, talk to Soos."

But, Bill noted, Stan was wearing said crummy ring. "Spend a day with that loser?" He rolled his eyes. "Please. I'd rather pry out my fingernails."

"You'd probably enjoy that, you freak."

"Not the point." Bill stuffed half an egg in his mouth. "Anyway, it has to be you. I need fillings, and Dr. Illing does them for free."

Stan squinted over the top of his newspaper. "How do you know about Dr. Illing?"

"What part of 'all-seeing eye' don't you get?"

Dr. Illing was a wandering dentist who spent the warm summer months in Gravity Falls. He squeezed his van and trailer into alleys between businesses in town, where he both lived and provided dental services until the police caught wind and chased him and his van out into the woods for a few days. On days with good weather, he'd pop open the back hatch of his nondescript trailer and set up a sign that read "COME INSIDE! FREE CANDY (for new patients)". He didn't attract many customers.

What really made him stand out was his unusual pay structure. He charged typical rates for regular teeth cleaning and dental maintenance; but if a patient had a cavity, he gave them a gold filling for free, and he paid them if he needed to pull their teeth.

Stan thought he was terrific. He hadn't had to pay for dental care in thirty years! Granted, he also wore dentures now; but hey, Dr. Illing had helped pay off Ford's mortgage, and at least the dentures were on the house.

Bill said, "You're the only one in the shack who knows all the places Illing might set up shop. Besides, he might be less jumpy in front of a stranger if an existing patient can vouch for it."

"I can see where you're coming from," Stan said. "But my answer is no, because I don't wanna."

Bill scowled in irritation. He sat back and ate another of Stan's eggs as he reconsidered his approach.

"Stanley—I'm a simple shape," he said. "A simple shape who's used to being coated peak to base in pure, lustrous, 24-karat gold. Having skin makes my skin crawl. I don't need any dental work done, these teeth are fine—but I'd really, really like just a bit of gold, somewhere on my body, so I feel a little more like myself in my final days."

Stan muttered, "You're trying to appeal to sympathy I don't have, Cipher."

"And then, once I'm dead," Bill went on, "I suppose I'll be leaving behind a corpse with a mouthful of free gold that whoever's disposing of my remains can do whatever they want with, do you catch my meaning Stanley?"

Stan lowered his newspaper just enough to grimace at Bill. "That's absolutely disgusting," he said. "But okay, I'm bribed!" He tried to fold the newspaper. "If you want your mouth to fund me and Ford's next year of globe-trotting, fine by me. Least you can do for messing up our summer."

"Mhm." Bill shoveled the last egg into his mouth while Stan was distracted by the paper and slid the plate over to Stan's side.

Stan slapped the paper down. "But we're not telling Ford about this. Agreed?" He offered a hand to shake.

"Agreed." Bill took Stan's hand, with the wrong hand—but before Stan could figure out what to do with that, Bill jerked his hand back like he'd been burned. "We'll take this to our graves."

"Or to your grave, anyway!" Stan laughed loudly, slapping the table.

Bill watched him with a forced smile. "Great. Deal made. Let's go get the magic friendship bracelets and—"

"Ohhh no," Stan said. "I'm not trusting a little bit of colored lace and some mystical hocus-pocus to keep you contained. If we're going anywhere, I'm making sure you can't escape."

"Okay," Bill said, a touch warily. "Fine. How?"

####

Soos took the handcuffs out of his toolbox, removed the key and stuck it in his pocket, and asked, "What side do you want it on?"

"Left," Stan said. "Gotta keep my punching arm free." Bill rolled his eyes. 

Soos closed the cuffs on Stan's left wrist and Bill's right, then tightened Bill's half until it actually held his tiny wrist. "There."

"Ha!" Stan grinned at Bill. "Try escaping that!"

"I wasn't planning to escape."

"Sure, pull the other one." Stan pointed toward the door. "Now... to the car!"

####

They stared in dismay at Stan's car.

The El Diablo was a classic of the 1960s American automotive industry—and it was in terrific condition. (Notwithstanding the recent dents, scrapes, and keyed scratches in the paint reading "TRICK-OR-CHEATER!!") It came with the features standard to American cars of the time, like a steering wheel on the left, and a wide front bench that provided space for multiple passengers to sit to the driver's right side.

Bill was handcuffed to Stan's left side.

"Wow. You're stupid," Bill said.

"I'll break your smart mouth."

"What do I care, we're headed to the dentist anyway." He sighed. "Okay! Let's go inside and tell Questiony how stupid you are."

Stan did not want to tell Soos how stupid he was. "No! How do you know I didn't do this on purpose? Maybe having my right arm free is more important than—er... driving."

Bill considered that with pursed lips. After a pause, he ventured, "Do you want me to drive—?"

"No, no, nope, I am not letting you drive my car, under any circumstances, ever! Not a chance!"

"Then how are we doing this?"

####

Stan gripped the steering wheel with both hands, knuckles white and jaw clenched.

Bill was uneasily cuddled up against Stan's right side. The handcuff forced him to stretch his right arm across Stan's chest. 

They were both wearing tank tops. Their bare upper arms were plastered together with sweat.

They were getting cricks in their necks from how far they were tilting their heads away from each other.

On the radio, a hit 50's soul song crooned romantically, "Oh, my sweet love... you're my lovely sweetie... and I never love you more, than when you're pressed to my side... as we go for a sweet loving car ride..." Neither of them could reach the radio dial without touching each other even more. They'd silently decided to pretend as hard as possible that they couldn't hear the radio.

"Welp," Stan said. "Out of all the times I've been handcuffed in a car, this is one of the worst."

####

They spotted Dr. Illing's "FREE CANDY" sign posted surreptitiously near the barrel and crate factory, and circled the block to park the car in front of a business that looked responsible enough to file a missing persons report if the car was still abandoned there by nightfall.

They tumbled out of the driver's side door with a maneuver that looked like a cross between a waltz and a mugging. Stan kicked the door shut. As they untangled themselves, in a surprisingly decent impression of Stan's voice, Bill said, "Gotta keep my punching arm free. How's that working out for you?"

"Bold words from a guy in punching range, you little—" As Stan finally separated himself from Bill and straightened out, he caught sight of Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland halfway up the block. "Oh, great. Cops. Exactly what you want around when you're doing something weird." Stan shook his head. "Well, as long as we go the other way and don't make eye contact—"

"Hi Darryl! Hi Edwin!" Bill stood on his toes and waved wildly. "Hey! Working hard or hardly working? Haha!"

"Oh, hey Goldie!" Durland waved back, and he and Blubs headed their direction. "How've you been, did you have a nice Summerween?"

"Ahh, I was stuck in the house—"

"Bill," Stan hissed. "Whaddaya think you're doing? Do you want them asking questions?"

"Hey," Durland said, "Why're you handcuffed to Stan?"

Bill turned toward Stan. He smiled at him. It was a smile that said I did not think this through.

"You need some help there?" Blubs asked. "I bet we've got a key that matches that handcuff model."

Stan bet Bill would love to accept that offer and go traipsing off with the cops. "Nope! That's fine! Thank you officers, but we're keeping the handcuffs on," Stan said. "Because." He paused. "They're necessary. For... uh... for me."

The cops and Bill watched him expectantly. Bill had that awful gleam in his eyes that he got when he saw an opportunity to make up a story.

"Because I'm old," Stan said. "It's to keep me from wandering into traffic."

Bill laughed, "Yep, that's true!" He jabbed Stan's shoulder with a finger (harder than necessary, he thought). "This guy's cataracts are so bad, sometimes he asks us if he's dying because all he a see is a white light in a dark tunnel! And the way his mind's going, woof—"

Stan growled, "All right you don't have to lay it on so thick—"

"—he's so addled it's like he's completely forgotten the last century of technology, he'll just walk right off the curb and expect the horse-drawn carriages to stop for him—"

"Hahaaa, but we won't bore you with my medical history!" Stan jerked on the handcuffs. "C'mon, Goldie, you're gonna make me late to my heart doctor appointment. You don't want my life on your hands, do you?"

Bill murmured, "Don't threaten me with a good time."

"Hold on," Blubs said. "You can't see? Didn't we just see you get out of the driver's seat of your car?"

Stan and Bill exchanged a look. Stan said, "Goldie's giving me directions."

"Oh! That makes sense," Durland said.

"All right," Blubs said, "We'll let you get to your doctor's appointment. You folks have a nice day."

As the cops left, Bill called after them, "You too! Hey, I'll see you guys at Rainbow Club!"

"See you there!" Durland turned to Blubs. "Y'know, I think Goldie's a step up from that seeing-eye bear."

Bill and Stan eyed each other. "All right, you're not bad at improv," Bill said. "I can respect a decent actor."

"You too," Stan said grudgingly. Bill looked at Stan like he expected a little more than that; but Stan kept his mouth shut. Bill didn't need the encouragement.

####

Dr. Illing's "FREE CANDY" sign leaned hopefully near a gap in the fence around an overgrown lot by the barrel factory. The gap was large enough that a reasonably limber human could duck through with little difficulty; however, Stan was old and Bill was still controlling his alien body like a rookie puppeteer learning the marionette, so they circled halfway around the lot until they found a gate in the fence to push open. They trod across scraggly grass, a row of dying mushrooms, and years-old litter to reach an unmarked white van hooked up to a camper trailer.

The back hatch of the trailer was flipped up to serve as a makeshift metal awning, and inside, a tall, spindly man was snoring atop a military cot in his underwear, using a white lab coat like a blanket. Stan cleared his throat loudly, and when that didn't disrupt the snoring, knocked on the side of the trailer. "Hey! Doc!"

Dr. Illing jolted upright with a yelp, seized an enormous wireless power drill off the floor to point at them like a gun, lowered it slightly as he registered he wasn't under attack, then realized he was nearly naked and yelped again. He tumbled off the cot, flailed his way to his feet, and turned his back to them as he jerked on his coat and buttoned it. "Just—just a second!" He got on one sock, couldn't find the other, and gave up, pulling on his sneakers with one bare foot. "Sorry, so sorry, I must've—just—nodded off for a second, there—"

"Maybe we should have made an appointment," Bill said wryly. "He looks busy." Stan snorted.

Dr. Illing turned around, smoothing out his rumpled lab coat. He was a jumpy, twitchy man with heavy circles under his eyes, short badly-cut hair, and a 5 o'clock shadow that had evolved into a 25 o'clock shadow. His gaze darted nervously between their faces. "Sorry. Hi, hello, can I help you? Are you maybe here for a tooth extraction, or—or perhaps wisdom teeth removal...?" His gaze caught on Stan's face, and he started. "Stan Pines! I haven't seen you since I pulled your last tooth ten years ago! What are you doing here?" His brows creased in worry. "You're—you're not mad about that, are you—?"

"What? No! The dentures are—fine. They're actually lower maintenance than teeth. Sort of. In a way," Stan said. "No, I'm here to refer a new customer." He pointed at Bill.

Bill made a gesture like he was tipping an invisible hat. "Hi there!"

"A customer?" Dr. Illing said blankly. "Oh—yes! Of course, hold on—" He pulled a hospital curtain over the front half of the trailer to hide a dinette covered in laundry and old magazines, lifted one end of the military cot and slid a step stool under the legs to keep it raised, and tugged the arm of a dental light down from the ceiling to aim it at the chair.

Stan said, "So, do I get some kind of referral bonus, or..."

"Oh—sure, sure. Have a, uhh..." Dr. Illing opened a heavy yellow and black tool bag, pulled out a battered cookie tin, withdrew a gold coin, and offered it to Stan. "One of these or something, here."

"Huh." Stan inspected it. No idea what currency it was, but a gold coin was arguably cooler than actual cash.

The dentist batted aside the hospital curtain to grab a tiny stool from the dinette, shook a damp towel off the seat, placed the stool beside the cot, and sat. "Okay!" He clapped his hands. "New customer! What can I do you for?"

Bill had been gazing in naked longing at the bag hiding the gold coins; but at the question, he looked up with a grin. "I'm here for fillings!"

"Ah! Wonderful. No charge for fillings, of course." He started rummaging through his tool bag for supplies. "Do you know which teeth need them?"

"Whichever you think would look best with some," Bill said. "Driller's choice!"

Dr. Illing stopped rummaging to give Bill a perplexed look. "I—sorry, come again?"

"I said I'm leaving it in your hands." Bill climbed into the trailer and put his free hand on Dr. Illing' s shoulder. "I'll be straight with you, Frankie: all that matters is that my teeth do not currently have any gold in them, and I want that to change by the time I leave. I'm not too picky about the details beyond that."

The dentist stared at Bill, then glanced at Stan for confirmation. Stan shrugged and nodded. "Oh-kay!" Dr. Illing wasn't quite smiling, but there was a strange, eager gleam in his eye. "Super! This'll be fun!" He gestured for Bill to sit on the cot. "Let's see what I have to work with."

He ushered Stan in, and pulled the trailer's hatch shut.

####

"Your teeth are amazing," Dr. Illing said, voice hushed with awe. "Perfectly white. Who's your usual dental hygienist? Did you just get these cleaned?"

"Nope," Bill said, forgetting for the third time that humans keep their teeth and their voice in the same hole and he shouldn't talk with the dentist's fingers in his mouth. Dr. Illing quickly pulled his hand back. "Just basic toothpaste, floss, and dish soap."

Dr. Illing shook his head in disbelief. "Well, they look amazing. And no wear at all, remarkable... Have you ever considered having any of these pulled? Do you mind if I take a few pictures?"

Stan shuddered as the dentist pulled out an old film camera and started snapping photos. "Yeesh. I forgot how creepy you are. Kinda glad I ran out of teeth."

Dr. Illing straightened up, snapped off the dental light, and sighed. "Well, I'm sorry to say that all your teeth are pristine. Not a hint of cavities—not even plaque. It'd be a shame to drill such pretty specimens. You're sure you don't want one pulled...?"

Stan grimaced, but Bill pursed his lips thoughtfully, as if he were considering a perfectly normal question. "As fun as that sounds, I said I want to leave with gold today, and the whole extraction-and-implantation process for gold teeth takes ages. Unless you happen to have a little secret magic trick to speed up the process?" Bill laughed, fixing Dr. Illing with a piercing stare.

Dr. Illing looked nervous. "Er—no."

"Then just the fillings. But who knows, maybe I'll feel naughty and be back in a couple of weeks." Bill laughed again. "Just pick a couple of your least favorite teeth to drill into!"

"Okay, suit yourself." Dr. Illing shrugged and fished around in an overstuffed cardboard box under the dinette table. "Let's gas you up and get drilling."

"You can skip the sedative," Bill said. "I don't mind a little pain. I prefer it, actually! It adds some zest to the experience..." He trailed off as he caught sight of the label on the gas canister Dr. Illing had pulled out. He pointed at a word, "I thought that additive was illegal."

Dr. Illing flinched guiltily. "Not in the state where I got it."

"Oh, buddy. I didn't realize I'd climbed into the party van!" Bill settled back on the cot, laced his hands behind his head, and got comfortable. "You know this stuff has something like sixty percent odds of causing hallucinations? Most people get either haloes around lights, or spiders. Go ahead, gas me—I wanna find out which I am."

####

In five minutes, Bill was overjoyed to report that the dental light had a spider halo. He did not explain what this meant.

Since Stan had typically been under anesthesia himself whenever Dr. Illing operated on him, this was the first time he'd had an opportunity to watch the dentist at work. Stan discovered that when Dr. Illing drilled into a tooth, he didn't suck the resultant dust up with one of those little dental vacuums with a plastic tube Stan was more familiar with. Instead, when a bit of dust had accumulated, he reached in with what looked like a cotton swab, wiped up the tooth dust, and scraped it off into a Petri dish; and only then did he use the vacuum to suck out any saliva and continue. Was he saving the leftover tooth dust? He was an even bigger creep than Stan had thought.

By all appearances, Bill didn't handle the gas well. It wasn't that it made him sick, or that he wasn't having the time of his life. It just made him completely forget how to operate a human body. When Dr. Illing told him to hold his mouth open, he also held his eyes open until they watered; and whenever he lost the battle to keep them open, he automatically shut his mouth too, often to his own peril as Dr. Illing shouted about the drill jostling. Within ten minutes, Dr. Illing had given up on convincing Bill to keep his mouth open and instead started giving him blink breaks when he could shut his mouth.

It helped some, but they couldn't do anything about the fact that Bill had fully forgotten he couldn't talk while getting dental work done, and kept up a regular chatter—during which he cheerfully mentioned he'd died recently, attempted to explain that the entire universe was actually an elaborate hologram projecting from the "true" third dimension, and asked Dr. Illing all about the cruise to Panama he'd recently stowed away on (which the dentist hadn't mentioned). During one blink break, as Bill closed each eye separately, Dr. Illing leaned toward Stan and muttered, "So... what's her story?"

Stan tilted his head toward the Petri dish. "What's with the tooth shavings?"

Dr. Illing considered that, slowly nodded, and got back to work.

####

After several hours, Dr. Illing wiped his brow and sighed in relief. "All right, that should do it. You've got fillings on five teeth now." Under his breath, he muttered, "It would have been two, if you hadn't kept talking while I was drilling."

Stan shook his head in amazement. "Doesn't that hurt?" 

"Yes," Bill said. "I've never felt pain like that before. What a rush."

"If you do come back for a tooth extraction, I'm getting a dental gag to keep your jaws open." Dr. Illing finished pulling out the array of clamps and barriers around the filling sites and wearily dropped down onto his stool. "There. The rest of the sedative should wear off gradually over the next few hours. Usually I tell patients to wait three or four hours before eating to let the swelling go down, but..." He waved wearily. "You can do whatever you want."

"Admit it, you like having an enthusiastic patient!" Bill heaved himself off the military cot, forgot he couldn't float, and immediately collapsed to the floor.

"Whoa there—" Stan helped Bill back to his feet. The handcuffs prevented him from getting an arm around Bill's back, so instead he helped keep him upright by firmly squeezing his upper arm. "I don't know about you, but I'm eating as soon as we get home. You made me miss lunch—and for some reason, I feel like I barely had any breakfast." Bill inexplicably found this declaration hilarious. Probably the sedative, Stan reasoned.

Bill waved at the dentist as Stan tugged him out the trailer's hatch, chattering the whole way: "Thanks for the gold, the sock you were looking for is a bookmark in the March issue of Floss Girls, Atlantis is rising as we speak, you have less than seven years to prepare for the plague, tell the little lady I said hi! Byyye!"

Stan squeezed Bill's arm tighter and muttered, "Would you cut that out?

Bill stumbled across the uneven lot. "I made up the part about Atlantis."

"Okay just shut up and stop saying weird things."

Bill attempted to walk sideways all the way back to the car.

####

Stan gripped the steering wheel so tightly, his arms were trembling.

Bill was sprawled all over the front bench, the dashboard, the seatback, and Stan's shoulders.

On the radio, a hit 80's R&B song with a sexy saxophone was playing, "Babe, the sad things you've been through... I swear I'll make it up to you... If it takes a thousand years..."

Bill was singing at the top of his lungs directly in Stan's ear, "I'LL WIPE AWAY ALL YOUR TEARS, WOO!—sax solo!—BA DA-DA DA, BA DA-DAAA—"

Stan turned off his right hearing aid.

Every once in a while Bill attempted to grab the steering wheel and turn it in time to the song, like a kid playing in a toy car; Stan had given up telling him to stop and instead started just smacking his hand away every time he tried. After another smack, Bill draped his arm awkwardly over Stan again, and announced, "I can't feel my tongue at all! I bet I can chew it off!"

"Don't do that."

"The last time my mouth was this numb, my girlfriend had just gotten done with me, haha." Bill stuck his finger in his mouth to experimentally poke at his tongue. "I couldn' thee for the nex' hour from all the thporeth—"

"I swear if you don't shut up—"

Bill flopped his arm across Stan again. "I just realized I haven't gotten any action since I died. Wow. What's normal for humans, couple times a week until you start the slow lingering decline toward death?" He looked straight at Stan. Stan could feel that side of his face start to sweat. "This isn't a weird time to bring that up, is it?"

"Bill, if you say one more weird thing, you're riding home on the roof of the car."

Bill was quiet for three seconds. And then he started poking Stan's bicep. "Your arm's a lot meatier than Sixer's! What's your favorite flavor of cancer?"

####

Mabel asked, "Why are you on top of the car?"

Bill—eyes wide, hair disheveled, one arm hanging through the driver's door, sprawled out clinging to the roof like his life depended on it—replied, "I don't know, it's all a blur."

Stan opened the car door and jerked on the handcuffs. "All right, get off my car."

Bill shakily climbed off, lay in the dirt, and tried to catch his breath. "That was fun. We should do that more often."

"Not on your life."

Eyeing the handcuffs, Dipper said, "What were you doing, anyway?"

"Nothing!" Stan snapped. "Why? Who's asking? I wasn't sneaking the demon out to get a shady back-alley dental procedure!"

Mabel and Dipper stared up at him.

Stan pointed at them. "What are you doing?"

"Going camping," Dipper said, turning so Stan could see his stuffed backpack.

"Something's been stealing Pacifica's alpacas at night, so we're going on a stake-out," Mabel said. "They took Giorgio. It's personal now."

"We think aliens might be abducting them," Dipper said.

From the ground, Bill said, "It's not aliens."

"Ah, taking the law into your own hands. It builds character," Stan said approvingly. "You need firearms?"

They exchanged a glance. "We're good," Mabel said. "Grunkle Ford loaned us his freeze ray. It seems less lethal."

As the kids headed toward the road, Bill finally heaved himself up. "Well, that was fun!"

"No it wasn't," Stan said.

"Your opinion doesn't matter. Anyway—" He shook his cuffed wrist. "We're home, get me out of this thing. It makes you look like my ugly accessory and I want my hoodie."

"I elevate your whole look!" Stan protested. "And I don't have the key, it's with Soos."

Mabel turned back to shout at them, "Soos is out! He's got a dinner date with Melody!"

Stan grimaced. "Uh-oh."

Bill shrugged and said, with a confidence Stan didn't share, "He left the key behind."

####

"Oh man, sorry dudes," Soos said over the phone. "I totally forgot I still had it. Yeah, it's on my key ring. Is that, like, gonna be a problem, or...?"

"It's fine," Bill said, sitting atop Soos's office desk and leaning all the way across it to reach the phone. "Just pass it through the phone, we'll catch it."

"What?"

"Ignore him." Stan shoved Bill's face away. Bill gave him a dirty look as he straightened out his eyepatch, which he'd finally gotten to put on once they were home. Stan spun the desk chair away from Bill so he couldn't try to join the conversation again. "He's hopped up on psychedelic laughing gas. When are you gonna be back?"

"Uh..." Soos thought for several seconds. "Nooot for a while. Abuelita and I were talking about maybe kind of staying the night?"

"Well—pfff—can't you duck out and bring the key?"

"Uhhh. I would but, this is the first time Abuelita and I are having dinner with Melody's parents, and I'm really worried about impressing them parents, and the casserole's about to come out, and I think they might judge me if I leave, it would probably ruin dinner..."

"Okay, fine. What if we drive over to get the key?"

Far louder than necessary, Bill asked, "Stanley can I drive this time—!"

"Absolutely not!"

"Oh sure, that'd be fine," Soos said. "I'll give you directions, Melody's parents' place is in Portland. You got a pen?"

Stan frowned. "Portland."

"Yep."

"As in, outside the magic bubble trapping Bill in town."

Soos paused. "Oh, right."

Well, Stan wasn't about to make Soos look bad in front of his future in-laws. He'd never had in-laws, but he'd seen enough sitcoms to know how messy that could get. "Never mind. We'll figure something out. You kids enjoy dinner." Stan hung up the phone, sighed, and turned to face Bill. (Bill had plucked a figurine of a bulky robot in a cute girly pose off of Soos's desk, and was staring at it in wonder, like he'd never seen overpriced anime convention merch before.) "You got any other bright ideas?"

"We could still call Darryl and Edwin..."

"No way," Stan snapped. "I am not calling the cops for help! Never gonna happen. I'd rather wait for Soos to get back in the morning if I have to!"

"Oh would you." Bill laughed scornfully. "And what do you plan to do until then?"

####

They got TV dinners and grumpily watched Cash Wheel together.

####

(This entire chapter was just an extended excuse to annoy Stan and Bill as much as possible. But mostly Stan. Thanks for reading, and if you enjoyed I'd appreciate a comment or reblog!!)

[osheamobile]

We said goodbye to Ru yesterday. Putting this behind a cut.

We got our cats not long after we got married, meaning there was very little time we were a household without the two of them running around. Ru and Jenny were a matched pair, the fosters refused to split them up, and we obliged.

One of the things that drew our attention was his name. The fosters had named him RuPaul, because he was a male calico, and while I'd heard it was tradition to rename your pets once you've adopted them, it was too perfect of a name to change.

He was extremely affectionate and would wake us up in the mornings at first with headbutts and purrs, and while over time he would gravitate towards my wife more (while Jenny would attach herself more to me), and stopped letting me pick him up in favor of only her, he always asked me to brush him and he knew I was the one feeding him so he knew exactly who to divebomb and bother when he got hungry.

He was the most food oriented cat I'd ever met, which was juxtaposed by his sister who very much was not, and he was the least picky cat I'd ever heard of - he'd eat anything and everything, he wouldn't care about medication mixed in his food even if the pharmacy accidentally made it cherry flavored instead of salmon like the vet requested. He was always up for treats and always made it everyone else's problem.

Because he was so food motivated, that was usually our first sign when something was wrong. He never refused food, even last year when his weight suddenly dropped like a stone and we found out the reason the vet kept reporting elevated white blood cell counts even when all the tests kept coming back inconclusive. It ended up being cancer, leukemia with complications that made his intestines have trouble absorbing nutrients. Because my office offers extremely good pet insurance (and I'm going to ring this bell forever, if you have the opportunity, take advantage, it is worth its weight in gold), we were in a position to give him the absolute best treatment available. Originally chemo pills that we were supposed to give him ourselves, then visits to the oncologist about 45 minutes away - he had a full round of chemo last year which was rough on everybody, including him, but it sent the cancer into remission.

It was not without side effects, though. Because of so much manhandling by doctors and the inundation with medication, he stopped being the darling of the vet's office and started requiring sedation. He grew spiteful of checkups and distrustful of any food that smelled wrong. He still ate voraciously, but grew pickier and learned ways to eat around pills and refused to eat any portions of food that had powders or liquids mixed in.

I don't blame him for any of it - I'd feel the same way in his position.

It was after a dental visit earlier this summer that it started. He'd had the rest of his canines pulled due to a condition that the dentist reassured me happened far too commonly in cats, and while his mouth healed beautifully he would only eat small portions of his food at a time. We didn't think too much of it because he would always go back to finish later.

Until he stopped doing going back to finish. Until he stopped eating any of his food at all.

It was several trips to the emergency vet last week that finally resulted in a test that told us the cancer had come back, harder. It was something that would not be treatable and that we should move into quality of life mode - something that might have given us a few more months or even another year, had he been eating. But he wasn't eating. We swapped foods constantly, begged, pleaded, mixed with water and canned tuna and everything else that had worked in the past, but he'd only eat a mouthful at a time and then stare at us, confused.

I had never had a pet before these two - we had a cat when I was very little but my parents gave her away after my brother was born, so I'd never been through this part of pet ownership. My wife had, many times, so I took my cues from her and followed her lead.

We scheduled an appointment with our normal vet. Requested his favorite vet tech, who at this point was assistant manager and usually not involved with day to day, but she agreed without hesitation because they love him so much there.

Yesterday we made him as comfortable as we could. It's harder to do a Best Day Ever for cats, at least in the same way you can for dogs, but we did what we could. We opened fresh cans of tuna and let him nibble as much as he wanted. We let him walk around outside, which he always wanted to do but we never allowed because he refused leash training and we don't have an enclosed yard. We cuddled him and told him how much we loved him, and this continued up through when it was time to take the last car ride to the vet, where we continued to hold him until he was gone.

It was the worst thing I'd ever done. I'm still trying to tell myself it was the right thing to do. I'm not okay and I won't be for a very long time, I don't think.

RuPaul was fifteen years old. We had him for twelve of those years. He was a terror and a bastard and the sweetest boy you'd ever meet. A very small number of people reading this have had the pleasure to know him in person, and a lot more have known him through our stories and pictures shared over the years.

He was so very loved, and we did our best to make sure he knew this all the way through the end.

[nettleofthedead]

Hello everyone. I feel very embarrassed to have to make a post, but I’m dealing with some urgent dental issues that need to be treated ASAP.

I have two teeth that need root canals. The molar tooth might need to be extracted and done as an implant, but I won’t know until they look at it. I also have a bad cavity that formed last night (exposing some of my dentin) next to the other tooth that needs a root canal. Infection is starting to form bad in there, as well. I’m not currently in any pain, but I’ve been getting sick lately because of it.

Using the cost estimator for my dental insurance, the total [estimated] portion of my half for my treatments is going to be $1,455. This is including the two root canal costs, and the new cavity that formed. I’m going to see my dentist ASAP, so the total cost may be adjusted after he checks it out. That said, I believe that my estimate should be accurate.

I’m in a very bad financial situation where I can’t save up the money for the treatment. I’m almost $4,000 in debt, and struggling to crawl myself out of it while barely being able to pay for rent and bills. I’m not asking for assistance on that mess though.

I have a scheduled appointment on my birthday, on April 1st. However, I’m only going to be able to reschedule the appointment back by another month. I really don’t want to, though, because of my health being affected.

I’ll be updating this once a day, apologizing for the spam.

Goal: $20/$1,455

Paypal: dead.nettled@gmail.com

Cashapp: $deadnettled

I don’t have other payment methods yet, but I can look into them if needed. Even if you can’t donate, I have very little of a following, so reblogging would be extremely appreciated. If anyone knows of other resources for me to look into (I can’t do CareCredit), I would appreciate it also.

[h20]

if anyone is able to help a traumatized disabled system… another one of my teeth just broke in my mouth. my appointment for xrays isn’t until nov 7th, until then i don’t even know what I’m working with for a treatment plan; there’s a lot of pain and pressure in my jaw, I’ve had a very limited diet due to my 1st broken tooth (+ having gastroparesis on top of that) & i really am not doing well emotionally / physically because of it. if anyone could please help me raise $60 so I can afford nutrition replacement shakes & a thc vape, you really would be helping me getting through the days until my appointment early next month so much. i have a lot of trauma around dentists and dental procedures in the past and this is truly so terrifying. it really sucks to go through halloween times while not being able to eat anything lol. thank you all for putting up with me, i have nowhere else to turn for this ;; 🤍

p | c | v

[angryschnauzer]

January 11th 2024

Yeah its been a while since i updated. I haven't had the energy to if i'm honest, but here we go.

Hubby had his brain surgery end of November '23. The tumour they took out was a nasty one, somewhere between the size of a golf ball and a kiwi fruit. The wound has healed well with little to no side affects apart from some double vision, but he was checked out for that and it is a common after affect of brain trauma and was remedied with an eyepatch for a few weeks.

We met with the Neuro Oncology team at Royal Marsden Hospital in London. They are one of the best (if not the best) cancer treatment centres in the whole country, and we worked through a treatment plan.

Just before Christmas hubby was also cleared to have shoulder reconstructive surgery (he broke his shoulder bone in the original seizures back at the end of October '23). There was a really small window of time between it being enough time after the brain surgery that he could go back under general anaesthetic, but also enough time to mostly heal before he started Radiotherapy and Chemo, so just 5 days before Christmas hubby was in and out of our local hospital in a single day to have that surgery.

Christmas was a quiet and subdued affair. I also herniated a disk in my back the day Hubby had surgery (i was clearing the deep freeze out ready for grocery delivery), so it meant both he and I were dosed up to our eyeballs on strong painkillers for most of the holiday, and Little Dude spent the majority of the break either playing video games or building his new lego sets.

Two days before Christmas i also had to have emergency dental work (i had been grinding my teeth and had previously cracked a tooth) and whilst i was in the dentists office some utter idiot crashed into my car. That was the last thing i needed but i simply handed it all over to my insurance company (who are aware of my husbands situation) and they arranged a hire vehicle and sorted repairs.

Onto the start of 2024. This is the first week of Radiotherapy and Chemo for Hubby. He is getting very tired and fatigued already from the Radiotherapy, but thankfully no nausea from the chemo as yet, but that could change over time. He is scheduled for a full schedule of 6 weeks of this dual treatment, where we are having to visit Royal Marsden every day Mon - Fri for the six weeks, and then he also takes the chemo 7 days a week for the six weeks.

He'll then have 4 to 6 weeks 'off' treatment for his body to relax and recuperate, but will have scans and MRI's during that time to gauge what further treatment will be, but its likely to be just chemo but a stronger dose, but no radiotherapy. The chemo is to be 3 weeks off one week on, so a 4 weekly cycle.

The one thing we have discovered isn't done is prognosis's. When we first got to Royal Marsden we were shocked as they started talking about years, and explained that although it was a really nasty tumour, it was found very early and whilst it was still relatively small for its kind. They've discussed things like 'this years treatment plan then we'll look at next years', and also for a while Hubby was being considered for a clinical trial which candidates who have prognosis's of 12 months+ are only considered for. In the end he didn't meet the criteria (his cholesterol was too high). The Macmillian Nurses also have been talking to us about Mobility Car assistance schemes where you can get govt assistance financially and get an adapted vehicle on a 2 year rolling lease. All these timings are reassuring in one way, but worrying in another - we have no idea what the future holds and it really does cement in stone that our time is limited and could end any moment, and makes it very difficult to make any long term plans. You don't realise how much of your life is preplanned until you end up in this situation and aren't sure if you can book your kid onto the school residential trip in 5 months time.

Should anyone want the mundane daily day-to-day life updates you can follow me on my personal instagram @simone_with_an_e its generally a load of utter boring bollocks, but i try to keep it updated daily with updates when i can as its a lot easier to do 1 short paragraph than a big update.

For me my mental health is a little better now that i've had time to process Hubby's diagnosis and that he is getting treatment. There are still days or hours when i fall apart, and it could be something as simple as listening to a song on the radio as i drive back from dropping Little Dude at school and i realise the song would be lovely at his funeral. I end up having to pull over and have a cry whilst switching the radio off. I'm loosing weight and aging quickly, my hair is turning grey from stress and i realised i've aged about 15 years in the last 3 from stress. My appetite comes and goes, and things like red meat now turn my stomach and i can't digest it. But i also haven't drunk alcohol since the day before Hubby had his seizure back in October. I feel like i need to stay 'alert' in case i need to rush him to the hospital for something. I don't miss it as such, but I miss the ability to fully relax. Its hard to describe but i feel like at the moment i've lost myself and am just functioning to care for those around me, going through the motions as such.

Anyway, this has been a long update. I do still lurk here, you may see me pop up in notifications liking something, but at the moment i don't feel its right to start putting fandom stuff back on here yet. I do hope to get back to writing at some point. I miss it and the unfinished stories plague my mind as i have such lovely plans for story arc's and really want to finish them.

Take care all,

Schnauz

xxx

[1863-project]

I haven't updated about Murphy since March, so I might as well do that.

(He found a bag and some tissue paper. They're his now.)

Short answer: he's okay at the moment. It's been weird but he's okay right now.

Long answer under the cut.

We've had a verrrry weird time with health stuff. The diabetes was actually temporarily in remission when the ER said he didn't have it, but it's back now and he's doing well on insulin. Whatever is going on with the pancreas nodules, he's acting like himself for now, so I'm enjoying all the time I can with him, whether it's months or years.

He has, however, been having issues with his few remaining teeth. He had an abscess in his cheek that we had to get drained and treated with antibiotics, and then when no veterinary dentist near me would take new patients right away, he got another one a few weeks later in his sinuses, which ended up making him look like a horn was about to sprout from his head, or perhaps Athena. It got so big that he couldn't open his eye.

Murphy managed to take care of that by himself by scratching at himself, which meant that I spent a Sunday night at 11:30 pm draining pus out of his head.

After that, he recovered and with some more antibiotics he was able to open his eye fully again. He's currently waiting to have his teeth potentially pulled, and he has antibiotics to prevent any new infections until then. Hopefully once that's taken care of I won't have to worry as much and can just enjoy the rest of his life with him.

[bybobbysbeard]

WIP Wednesday

Some Hawaii Five-O hurt/comfort and a first kiss. Set early series, Danny POV.

“Kinda wild that our most successful drug raid was because I took a shortcut to my dentist's office. Oh hey, I bet the governor can get me out of the missed appointment fee.”

“Our most successful raid?” Steve asks incredulously.

Danny waves a hand over his bruised body. “Ah, but you were looking for me, so I still get credit.”

Steve tips his head back down and hurray, the super intense eye contact is back. “Yeah, I was. Looking for you, I mean. We tore through that place for you Danno.”

“I know Steve. I knew you were looking for me as soon as I woke up in that fucking car.”

“What happened after that? Obviously the car crashed but their injuries weren’t consistent. And you hit the road at speed judging by this.” One of Steve’s hands lets go of Danny’s and reaches up to the left side of his face. He traces the edge of the road rash on his jaw, and Danny wants to see how bad the damage is, but he doesn’t want Steve to stop touching him. The hand migrates to cupping his jawline, fingertips stroking the thin skin behind his ear and down his neck.

Steve seems to realize what he’s doing and his hand stops moving. He’s leaning close, over Danny’s immobilized left arm. His other hand is still holding Danny’s. Danny licks his dry lips and Steve’s eyes zero in on the movement, that heat Danny’s been chasing for months coming back into his eyes. And Danny’s fucking tired. He hurts all over, and is ready for another dose of pain meds. He hasn't even been awake an hour, but he wants to sleep for a day. He’s tired of wanting Steve, but having him just out of reach. It’s been months of touching and flirting that crosses too many lines, and no payoff other than his own right hand at the end of the night.

“Steve…please.”

Steve swallows heavily, and Danny is a detective alright, he detects. He is making a connection between Steve and Danny saying please in that tone of voice. Steve leans forward and Danny tries to meet him but with one leg off the bed and one useless arm he doesn’t have a lot of leverage. Steve closes the distance between them, face too close for Danny to focus, so he shuts his eyes and tips his chin up the smallest amount.

There’s the softest press of lips against his, tender, and so gentle Danny could cry. Danny squeezes Steve’s hand, and Steve crowds just the slightest bit closer to him. Danny tilts his head into Steve’s grasp and lets his lips part and woah, that’s what he’s been missing. Of course, Steve presses the advantage immediately, tongue darting out to trace Danny’s lips and Danny shivers all over. Danny’s already felt those lips on his hand today, but this is a whole new experience. A fucking paradigm shift of a kiss. Even with their stubble scraping together, it’s wet and hot, and getting hotter as Steve holds him right where he wants him.

Danny’s exhausted but Ma Williams didn’t raise no quitter, so he’s giving as good as he can in the circumstances. Sure, Steve is controlling the kiss, but as Danny nips that plush lower lip, Steve is the one that groans, low and sexy. Danny feels like he’s igniting, kiss growing rougher until Steve is pressing him into the bed, that big, calloused hand on his face and fingers twisted in his hair. Jesus Christ, Danny has imagined kissing his boss a lot, but his fantasies never came close to this.

[moviesludge]

dentist update (first time in about 3ish years) - would love input on this if you work in the dental field and notice something amiss here. for the most part this office has done great work, but some conflict between them pushing for more work and my insurance not covering it was a big part of why it took me so long to go back

had a cleaning with no numbing, went ok. Just a few sensitive spots that hurt for a fraction of a second

i thought i had an abscess but I don't (yet)(partially exposed nerve)

I need a lot of work. they want to root canal/post/cap like 4 or 5 of my teeth (I definitely have some rough ones but I wonder how necessary R-P-C's are versus like, just getting a root canal and filling). There are a few "just fillings" that I need though.

I have a broken tooth that needs to be pulled

one of the teeth they want to work on is one they already R-P-C'd but after the x-ray, dentist said there is a "lesion" near the root. I have no pain there but he said maybe it didn't heal properly or something. This is suspect to me considering it hasn't been a problem at all, but he did show me the little dark spot on the xray.

after the cleaning, the dentist pulled out a big filling I had that he said looked like it was about to fall out. He barely tugged at it and it fell out. He didn't give me a temp filling or anything. I asked about it and he told me to just keep it clean until they can work on it. (I was trying to chew on the left side of my mouth to keep food out of the place where I thought I had the abscess on the right, and now I have an open tooth on the left too so I might shove some temporary filler in there until my next appt next week).

curiously, they told me that everything would be covered by my insurance except for the cleaning they'll want to do in 6 months, which isn't too pricey. I expressed surprise to this because a bunch of stuff didn't get authorized last time I was there. The lady said something like "don't be surprised, it's always been covered" which concerns me because a lot of stuff wasn't approved last time by the insurance. So maybe I need their definition of "covered" vs "authorized" or something.

I have another appt next week.

The reason I list all this stuff out is to clarify it all in my head and have a record of what happened that I can refer back to when I will inevitably forget. Also I asked for a copy of the dental plan list and the prices, and the lady told me it would be emailed to me. So far no email.

[soursturniolo]

scare, alternate ending • matt sturniolo

pairing: matt sturniolo/fem!reader

summary: matt and you handle a pregnancy scare. alternate ending to the original scare

tags: angst and then fluff, with some humor sprinkled in. happy ending.

tw: light discussion of periods and pregnancy

It feels like my heart stops as I look at the calendar on my phone.

9 days late. And I’m never late.

I noticed this morning that my box of tampons still sat in the cabinet, unopened, in Matt and I’s shared bathroom. I hadn’t thought anything of it, until I opened my calendar to see when my next dentist appointment is.

I swallow dryly as I lock my phone and slip it back into my pocket, dropping down to sit on Matt and I’s bed. All I can think about is that damn calendar. 9 days late. 9 whole days. One or two days is normal I guess, but nine entire days?

I can feel my thoughts spiraling already. Matt and I are safe. I’m on a good birth control and we use condoms often. But even those aren’t foolproof. I do remember forgetting my pill twice this month.

Oh god. What if I’m pregnant? I’m not ready for a kid right now.

Oh god, and Matt. Matt isn’t ready either. With his career and plans with his brothers there’s no way this could even work right now. It would ruin everything. I feel tears of worry and anxiety fill my eyes and begin to drop down my cheeks.

My thoughts just continue to spiral and spiral, until I feel the bed dip next to me. I turn to see Nick, who had stayed behind with me while Matt and Chris went out to pick up some groceries.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” He asks concerned, his arm wrapping around my shoulder, pulling me into a side hug as we sat together.

I open my mouth to speak as my eyes meet his, but all that comes out is a sob. My hand moves to cover my mouth as more sobs follow. Nicks face creases in worry as his other arm wraps around me, pulling me into a hug as he rubs my back soothingly.

“Deep breaths, babe. Whatever it is, it’ll be okay,” he tells me, making me jerk back as I shake my head.

“No it won’t! He’s going to hate me!” I cry.

“If you’re talking about Matt, that kid could never hate you,” Nick tells me, voice calm and reassuring.

“I don’t know, Nick,” I laugh without humor, “this might.”

“Did you cheat?” Nick asks face calm, but apprehensive.

“No! God no,” I immediately answer.

Nick gives a small smile at the quick response.

“Okay, highly doubted it when I asked anyway,” he laughs, “but I don’t know what else could have you so upset thinking he’s going to hate you. You can talk to me, I want to help. What’s wrong?” He asks again.

I sigh. Nicks my best friend. He’s how I met Matt in the first place. I really wanted to just talk to Matt about this first, but with LA traffic and all Matt probably won’t be back for another hour. I don’t think I can survive another hour keeping this all bottled up.

“Nick, it’s bad,” I begin, voice shaken.

“I don’t care how bad, I’m here,” he immediately responds.

I take a deep breath.

“I’m late.” I state.

If this wasn’t so serious, Nicks reaction would have been funny. He stares at me blankly for a moment, before his head cocks to the side a bit in confusion.

“Like, to an appointment?” He asks, lost.

“No, Nick,” I sigh, shaking my head, “my period is late” the last part comes out like a whisper.

Once Nick connects the dots his jaw drops open a bit in surprise, confirming my feelings.

“See! It’s so bad, Nick, this is so bad!” I yell, jumping up from the bed and beginning to nervously pace in front of where Nick sits, still shocked.

“N-no, it’s not bad!” He stutters as he watches me with wide eyes.

I stop pacing and just look at him.

“Really? Not bad? Your jaw dropped open like that because you were trying to catch a fly, then?” I ask sarcastically.

“Listen, I just got confronted with the fact that my best friend and brother fuck, I needed a second,” he defends, hands up.

“Nick, we’ve been dating a year. We dont go to bed and play clash of clans together,” I tell him, making him roll is eyes.

“I know! I know but I also don’t think about it and now we kinda have to think about it and I don’t like it!” Nick exclaims.

“Don’t think about it!” I yell back.

We pause for a minute, staring at each other before we both crack smiles at how ridiculous this has become. We laugh and I return to sitting next to him. Nick wraps his arm around my shoulder again and rests his head against mine.

“So, how late are we talking?” He asks, getting back to the important point.

“9 days,” I whisper.

“Okay. Not horrible. Could be later,” he says, nodding. I nod too. A moment of silence passes as I nervously pick at my nails and Nick stares at the wall, thinking.

“Well, I think we know what we gotta do.” He says, softly.

I turn to him, knowing too.

“Let me call Matt, he should still be at the store with Chris. They can pick up a test,” Nick says. I take another shaky breath before nodding in agreement. I get my phone out and go to Matt’s contact, dialing his number before handing my phone to Nick.

“Hey baby,” Matt’s voice comes through the speaker softly.

“Hey, it’s Nick,” Nick says, earning a confused noise from Matt.

“Nick? Why do you have her phone? Is she okay?” He asks quickly, his concern making me smile softly despite the stressful situation.

“Um,” Nick pauses, which only worries Matt further.

“‘Um’, isn’t a good answer when a guy asks about his girlfriend, Nick,” Matt responds quickly.

“Sorry, she’s okay, but we need you to pick up something else for her while you’re at the store,” Nick says.

“Okay, what?” Matt asks.

Nick looks at me, encouraging me to speak. I take a breath before taking the phone out of Nicks hands, taking it off speaker and holding it to my ear.

“I need a pregnancy test,” I tell him softly.

I cringe as there’s a moment of silence on the other end of the line.

“Okay, I can grab that. Do you need anything else, sweetheart?” He asks softly. I smile again despite the tears I can feel coming again.

“No, that’s it,” I whisper.

“Okay, we’ll be back soon, I love you,” he tells me.

“Love you too” I say back before hanging up.

Nick and I move downstairs, where he puts on a movie for us to distract us while we wait. I let myself be pulled into its predictable plot line as we wait for Matt and Chris to come home.

We both are startled out of our focus on the movie when we hear the front door unlock, followed by it opening to reveal Matt coming in with a mostly empty plastic bag in his hand, while Chris came in carrying the other groceries. Nick moves to help Chris and grabs some of the heavier bags from him, both of them walking to the kitchen while Matt walks over to me.

I stand as he meets me by the couch. He looks surprisingly calm, while meanwhile I feel like my insides are shaking with the anxiety I’m feeling right now. He gives me a small smile before wrapping me in his arms. I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding as I relax into his arms, resting my head against his chest. He gives me a gentle squeeze as I feel him press a kiss to my head.

“Let’s head to our room, baby,” he whispers, pulling back from the hug and grabbing my hand to lead me that way. Once in his room, he hands me the bag with the pregnancy test in it before sitting on his bed. Before walking to our bathroom, I pause.

“Matt, I need to know what this will mean,” I tell him.

He gives a small smile and holds his hand out to me. I walk over and grab it. He gives my hand a gentle squeeze, before bringing it up to lips to give it a kiss.

“We’ll do it together. Whatever it is. Sure, I thought kids would be later. But, if now is the time, now is the time. I think I’d be more freaked if this was with some random girl. But with you? I know whatever happens, we will be just fine,” he tells me, before giving the back of my hand another kiss.

“You promise?” I ask.

“I swear,” he tells me.

I smile and nod, before heading to the bathroom. The test is quick and easy, and I’m soon done. I leave the test on the bathroom counter, set my timer for fifteen minutes, and come back out to sit next to Matt on our bed. I rest my head on his shoulder as Matt wraps his arm around me. We just quietly sit, both of us lost in our thoughts as we wait, only to be shaken out of our trances by my phone loudly going off.

I sigh as I stand and walk back to the bathroom to grab the test. I pick it up, careful to not flip it over to show the result, and walk back out to Matt. I stop in front of him. He gives me another reassuring smile as his hands come up to rest on my hips.

“Ready?” I ask, voice cracking.

“Yeah, baby,” he says.

I take a deep breath, knowing this small test in my hand could change everything for the both of us. But I look at Matt, looking up at me with so much warmth and comfort in his eyes, and it’s not so scary anymore.

I flip the test over, both of our eyes moving to see the result.

Two little lines that change everything. It's positive.

My eyes immediately fill with tears, overflowing and hot as they run down my cheeks. My eyes move from the test to trail up to Matt's face. His eyes are wide as they stare at the result in shock, but I watch as a smile overtakes his face, his eyes moving from the test to my face as he beems at me.

"Baby! We're having a baby!" he cheers, dropping the test as he scoops me up in his arms, twirling me around. Despite the fear and anxiety I feel, I find myself smiling and laughing at his excitement. After a moment of us both giggling as he joyfully swung me around, he sets me back on my feet gently, his hands coming up to cup my cheeks and brush my tears away with his thumbs.

"I know this isn't how we expected this to happen, or even when we expected it, but I swear to you that I'm all in. One hundred percent. I'll be with you every step of the way. Every day, every appointment, every late night and early morning, I'm here and I'm always going to be here. I love you so much, sweetheart, and I love our little us just as much already," he tells me softly but devotedly. He means every word with his heart and soul, but I never had any doubts about him to begin with.

"I know, Matty. I love you too." I whisper to him, my voice breaking as tears start falling again.

"I know, I know this is sudden and scary and it's going to be a big life change for us, but we have each other always. I know you will be the best mom to our baby. I am so lucky to have you, and to be doing this with you. You don't have to be scared, I'm right here with you," he says, leaving a soft kiss on the top of my head as he pulls me into his arms, holding me so gently against him.

It's all suddenly so real. I'm having a baby with the love of my life, the best and most kindhearted man I've ever known. I pull Matt even closer to me, cupping his face and pulling his lips against mine for a sweet kiss, soft and full of all the love we have for each other and this new little life we will have.

We slowly pull away from each other, soft smiles painting both of our faces when we suddenly hear a loud thud from the hallway. Matt raises an eyebrow and walks towards our closed bedroom door, and I follow. Matt opens the door to find both of his brothers laying on the floor outside of his door, all tangled up in a heap, Chris on top of Nick who is caught in the middle of cursing Chris out as soon as the door opened.

"God damn it Chris, the one fucking time you really need to be careful you fucking flop on me like a goddamn elephant you stupid— oh, ha ha, hi there matthew," Nick says, voice quieting even more and looking sheepish at being caught eavesdropping. I stiffle a laugh at the two of them laying on the floor, as I look up to see Matt looking at his brothers with an irritated look but some fondness still in his eyes.

Chris, however, has no shame in being the clumsy one to get them caught, and instead quickly rises to his feet and grabs Matt in a bear hug, despite Matt stiffening up and turning to look at me with a loof as if asking for help. I stiffle a laugh and shake my head at the antics of the soon to be uncles.

"You're going to be a dad! Can we start buying cute baby shit now?!" Chris asks us both excitedly, still squeezing Matt in his arms. I smile and nod as I move to join in on the hug, Nick following to join in too. We already have such a good little family here, and I feel overwhelmed with happiness and excitement in adding to it.

note: woo its been 5 months since I posted the original version of this story. I'm so so sorry it's taken so long for the alternate version I promised but life has been a whirlwind. I'm hoping this will be the start of getting back into writing and creating :) love u all always ♥

tag list members; @secret-sturniolo @sturniolopepsi @christinarowie332 @mangosrar @cupidsword @st4rswrld @biimpanicking @bernardenjoyer @lovingsturniolo @sturnphilia @mxqdii @oh-toseewithoutmy-eyes @its-jennarose @fionaheartswomen @hedgehogperalta @thetriplets3 @lilsxo10 @recklesssturniolo @meg-sturniolo @flowerxbunnie @mlimmm @querenciasturniolo @jjmaybankswifes-blog @leah-loves-lilies @0-r-a-y-0 @sturnioloslut-b @sturnioloenthusiast @sturnworld @sturns-posts

[firstkanaphans]

hi! im kind of new to the gmmtv world and how they operate and have a question. i've seen some people talk about a 2025 line up announcement soon-ish since the last one had its part 1 in october. but they still seem to have so many shows to finish and air from both parts now so would ANOTHER announcement even make sense atp? thank you, loving your blog <3

Hiiii! Funny you should ask that because I’ve been wondering the same thing myself…

Up until last year, GMMTV would have one big event per year, usually around October or November, where they would announce the next year’s line-up. Last year, for some unknown reason, they decided to split it into two parts. Part 1 was in October 2023 and Part 2 was in April 2024. I hope and pray they don’t split it again because that format inevitably leads to disappointment. Speaking as a FK stan, I was stressed for a solid six months because the boys didn’t get anything in Part 1, and even fandoms who did get something in Part 1 were disappointed when their faves didn’t get anything else in Part 2.

There are always a few leftover shows that carry forward from year-to-year, so a GMMTV 2025 event will happen regardless. We just don’t know when it’ll happen or how many parts it’ll be split into. My hope is that they’ll go back to the old schedule and do a singular event in November, but my guess is that they’re going to split it again.

There have already been some rumblings about GMMTV 2025, which seems to indicate a new event is on the horizon. Mark said that he and Ohm were offered another BL, but decided to turn it down so they could focus on Sweet Tooth, Good Dentist—which hasn’t even started filming yet. So it seems like assignments are already being handed out. Usually, you can tell when they start filming pilot trailers because pictures will pop up of cast members hanging out with people they don’t usually hang out with.

Speaking of…did we ever figure out why First was on the set of The Trainee pilot last year? I’m half convinced they filmed two versions of that trailer—one with Sea and one with First—because what other explanation is there? Wasn’t First literally wearing Tae’s clothes? That’s another one of those mysteries that haunts me.

I’ve gotten a bit off-topic, but I hope that answers your question, Anon. And if anyone else has heard any GMMTV 2025 rumors, please let me know. I have FK blinders on most of the time and any news not related to them is liable to miss me.

[asksidon]

could you do a drabble about teeth/dental care? i feel like its very different between hylians n the zora, it would be cute to see sidon n his sweetheart talk about yet another cultural/species based difference between them. fem pronouns are always preferred when brought up, but never necessary! TIA <3

"So, let me get this straight," Sidon says slowly, seeming to contemplate both your appearances in the large bathroom mirror of your chambers. "You have to go to a . . . a tooth doctor, every six months, to get your teeth scraped with odd machinery? To make sure they're . . . healthy?"

You place your toothbrush down, your evening ablutions having triggered this discussion. "Yes, that's the essence of it," you say, wondering if there was a better way you could have explained. The baffled look on the prince's face is rather adorable, though.

"And if they're not healthy? What does the tooth doctor do, exactly?" He watches as you start to floss. It gives you a good reason to pause and think through your answer. Hylian health topics can be complex even to one who is familiar with them.

"Well, then they figure out what the problem is. Sometimes they can do it just by looking around in your mouth. Most commonly, Hylians suffer from cavities or buildup around the teeth, especially if they haven't had a professional cleaning by the den-- er, the tooth doctor in quite some time," you explain.

"What is a cavity?"

After you explain, he is still rapt with interest in the subject. "Huh. That explains why you've never lost a tooth around me, then. I never realized that Hylians can't regrow their teeth, as the Zora do. Now I feel a bit silly." He eyes your toothbrush, a shadow of something more in his expression, but he says no more on his feelings. "Do you have an extra one of those?"

Suppressing your questions, you dig through your toiletry bag until you find the one the dentist last gave you. You've never had cause to open it, given that you use an electric toothbrush. "Sorry, it's not a fancy one," you say, "but it will get the job done. You don't have to, though. It won't be bad for you like it is for me, if I go without brushing."

"I know. I . . . think it's nice, though. And if you're going to do it, then so should I." He blushes a little. "I do hope I haven't been unpleasant for you to kiss, Y/N."

"Of course not." You are silent for a moment, taken aback both by his sudden interest in Hylian tooth care and his self-consciousness. "You've always taken good care of yourself and your diet, my prince. You have nothing to worry about. I never thought anything about it before now."

He turns from the mirror to look into your eyes. "Truly?"

"Yes. Don't make me prove it to you." You give him a small smirk.

"Hm. That sounds like a threat." The corner of his mouth turns up a little. "So why is it so utterly alluring to me?"

He grins and places the toothbrush down on the counter so that he can pull you close and give you a little squeeze. Conscious of his own massive size, he takes care whenever he touches you, careful to listen to the pattern of your breathing and your heart. He sometimes mistakes the butterflies in your stomach and chest for fear, and he is gentler than you'd like. In response, you hug him tightly, wrapping your legs around him as your feet leave the floor.

"You. Bed. While I finish up here." He gives you a quick peck on the lips that tells you he is still battling somewhat with his self-consciousness, but you decide that if brushing his teeth makes him feel better, you won't argue with him about it. He might need a much bigger brush, though. You wonder if you can find one in the Zora shops on some off chance. You expect him to place you down, but instead, he carries you to your bed and gives you a kiss on the forehead as he sets you down on it.

You start to snuggle under the covers. He pauses and turns back toward you on his way back to the bathroom. "Hey, Y/N. Do you think I could come with you next time you go? To the tooth doctor, I mean?"

"I . . . uhm, sure." Your mind is on a completely different subject by now, so his question jostles you. "If you want."

"Thank you." He smiles. "I'll be back. Get ready to show me some proof." With a wink, he disappears around the corner, the sounds of vigorous brushing ensuing.