#i have an idea for a drawing but i can't remember if it's me remembering a manga panel i can't find

[elsa-fogen]

Yep. Yeah. That's me. Almost all of it, except, i sleep well (if i manage to fall asleep) Reblogging because maybe some of you didn't know (i also didn't know)

Story time!

Too long don't read: used to sleep on private math lessons because i hate math; it takes hours for me to fall asleep WHEN I SUPPOSED TO, and my sister does it in 3-5 minutes.

I was studying at university and we had MATH there I've always had problems with it. since 5th grade i think (well, i hated math before too but real problems started there) when i changed schools and the new class was behind what I've already studied and i didn't pay attention, until i realized that at some point I was behind. I said "welp, i guess it's to late to try, so fuck it"

So at university we had this very high level math and i just couldn't understand a thing (and we had an awful teacher who was saying evvvvery time something like "yall getting expelled, we're all gonna die") so i decided "if i don't understand, fuck it then, i will not even try" and started skipping math classes.

But i STILL had to pass an exam, we were getting 3 tries and if you fail you're getting expelled. I failed first two what a surprise (i don't know how i managed to pass it after all, i can't remember SHIT, only that i is fucking non-existing number which is square root of -1. Why on earth would you need it i have NO fucking clue.

So i had personal teachers who tried to make me understand at least something to pass the exam. And there was one i remember very well, i even remember that we paid her 10$ per hour (for us that was quite a lot). And i remember her because i was SLEEPING. I just COULDN'T keep my eyes opened. She explains something about deviding by zero and my brain draws the fucking universe collapsing in front of my eyes. She gives me some task, I'm trying to write something and I'm falling asleep and DREAMING about writing, then ahe wakes me up and i see that i didn't write SHIT. It all ended when in the middle of lesson she just kicked me out.

And, what a miracle, I'm leaving her apartments and suddenly, all the sleepiness just wanishes! I'm walking home, thinking about some another AU of mine, roleplaying it with myself in my head, full of energy again.

That's not the only case of this, but it's the strongest i ever felt. But that like happens all the time, EVEN WHEN MY MOM OR MY GRANNY COMES TO ME AND START TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING I'M NOT INTERESTED, IM YAWNING AND FEEL URGE TO FALL ASLEEP. But the moment they leave, It goes away! I was calling it work allergy LMAO

I was diagnosed with adhd in my early childhood (there was also something about epilepsy, but it's ok now so it doesn't matter), not long ago i brought this fact back into my active memory (thanks to Jaiden animations ADHD video for that xD) i kinda used to myself by now and now I'm trying to catch and analyse all moments of adhd kicking in. I know my own tricks and buttons, how to make myself do the thing or just how to force myself into doing something. Because i know if i start, I'll probably lock in and won't get up until it's done (well, if i have at least a tiny bit of interest in that thing, or else i won't), and i hate it when someone interrupts me in the middle of the process. No mom, i can't come right now, i can't finish it later, because i either spend few more hours forcing myself to go back to the task or just forget about it.

But i didn't know that this sleepiness was a legit symptom! I just thought that it's exaderated boredom, that's it, had a joke name for it. That's... Funny to know that this thing is actually also adhd moment.

Also, about sleeping. I have problems falling asleep. I may lie in the bed for hours without even my phone, just rotating my stories in my head, and when i don't have a story to think about, this is just the name of my current hyperfixation with different tones and in different random dialogues that doesn't even make sense. I have no idea how to fall asleep, except when i didn't sleep for like 48 hours (EVEN THEN IT MIGHT BE A PROBLEM AND I START THINKING OF THAT CREEPY PRION SICKNESS AND SCARE MYSELF AGAIN). And my mom told me that it have always been like that with me. She and my dad had the whole ritual to make me fall asleep. Dad would hold me in his arms, his head with me covered with a blanket that i could only see his face (or else I would look everywhere and never fall asleep), and rock me for HOURS while i was SCREAMING and CRYING the whole time like i was tortured. But when I'd finally fall asleep, they could be as loud as usual and didn't have to whisper, because wake me up is a whole different story. And my mom was SHOCKED when all it took to make my sister fall asleep was just pet her back for 3-5 minutes.

I don't think of myself as... Sick or ill. That's how i was all my life, i don't know anything else. That's not a sickness to me, that's just part of my personality. Maybe sometimes some parts of it bite me in the ass and make my life harder, but i don't know other life. That's the only one I've got, and i guess I'm fine with that (tho now that i think about it, i need to pay more attention to how i write the characters, and don't make them all ADHDshers LOL i need to study neurotypical people under a microscope 🔬🔍)

bro im gonna CRY i didnt know this 🥺

[mikichko]

Ghoap/bluetooth anon. The reader has a list of names she wants for her future kids and number 1 for a boy was Zachary and the reader added a note next to it that basically says “I got my perfect Zachary already” or something like that and the boys find it and are trying to fight back both their horny knee jerk reactions to the reader with more kids and their tears because she really was meant to come into their family from the start, huh?

hi cariño!! this has been sitting in my inbox and got drowned by everything else!

i'm writing this with a focus on johnny cause I can't hone in on simon's pov at the moment. now dont glare at me too much since i haven't written in a while but here i go...

Fatum part of chao mi niño cw: female reader, suggestive language (nothing explicit), all lowercase

johnny finds the list on accident.

he's rifling through the papers on your desk in search of the nursery details when he finds something else.

the sheet's color captures his attention at first. it's white, but dulled in comparison to the other papers on the desk. his fingertips graze the sheet, the material smooth and sturdy under his skin. your strokes affirm the feeling, carbon staining the sheet without a stray line. fluid and cohesive throughout the paper, safeguarding your words.

his eyes trace the words and he suddenly understands why you'd been meticulous in choosing your materials.

it's your list of baby names.

the names are printed neatly on blank campus paper. everything is written in pencil, no trace of pen ink. each name is accompanied with it's meaning and small drawings that you've brightly colored.

there are creases across the sheet from where it's been folded. and if johnny stares at it long enough he can start to gather what you've folded it into countless times.

he can't help but wonder how often you'd unfolded the paper. had you known all these names would be yours from the beginning? did you start with only one and build your way up? how long had you been ruminating over the idea of your own babe?

johnny tries to move past that last thought but a warmth spreads across his lower belly. he thinks of you, alone in your own flat, the list held in your hands as you wonder when you'll have the chance to use a name.

his hand grips the edge of the desk as he breaths deeply, trying to calm the sudden urge that arises in him. to have you on your back, give you a child for each of the names on your list. make this goal of yours a reality.

he closes his eyes, breathing deeply to settle himself, before he opens them again.

this time he catches something new. lead ink, more saturated and darker than the rest, right next to the first name on the list.

Zachariah - God remembers got my zachy. he'll always be reminded he's loved

johnny's breath stills. his chest tightens and he swallows.

he remembers the nights he'd spent in the desert. skin chafed by sweat and aggravated by the sand. staring up at a sky that Glasgow hadn't let him see. eyes tracing the stars that had watched so many before him. he'd asked the stars then what the hell he was doing. asked them for guidance in his life because he had no idea what he was marching towards.

at the time he'd thought it was certain death.

but now here, in this house, with this list, and an empty nursery underway he understands.

he'd been making his way to you. to simon. to zach. to the family that had been waiting for him.

[lulu-draws-stuff]

Don't fraggle me I'm rock. er.. fraggle scared. umm....

[sysig]

“It could be that the loss of her children drove the Queen deeper into her darker desires...but, I don’t believe she was fighting against them that hard before that particular tragedy. No monster does.” (Patreon)

Bonus:

Hmm, wonder what he could cover those holes with :3c

[desultory-novice]

"If Not a King..."

My last drawing request/story idea type deal till further notice. And of course, is anyone surprised it's Marxolor? ^^

[full ask below the read more]

@dr34myg34rm4f0l0r Turns out I went with the post-epilogue version you put forth instead of the "to make fun of each other" one but it still turned out fairly light-hearted, I'd say?

...Light-hearted for me of course ^^;;;

[eldritchbanana68]

tiny fuckass panicked loop scribble

[unproduciblesmackdown]

imagine...

...that some things have changed (including some marigold ventures?) and Atlas May is like uh oh both lackadaisy & i are doomed, but if i set up my own death maybe only i'll be doomed and lackadaisy might have to shutter but perhaps more so on involved people's terms, such as mitzi being fine financially, but also if she thinks it's her fault that'll be good for maintaining my posthumous Image to her, perhaps she did some defrauding again? and i'll have mordecai, my trusted & effective gunman, be the one to fatally shoot me, & of course he doesn't want to, but it's Mere Work Ethic time, what's he gonna do besides argue at all maybe, ultimately refuse? (no) and he may hate it but he's not going to want to fully turn on mitzi or anything after because then what would have been the point

[kirby-the-gorb]

[zerozeroren]

Fakiru Week, Day 4: Glare

I think i made it more of a gaze, really? Isn't glare like a bad look? I'm not sure. My second language English is showing XD Anyway, Ballgown AU brainworms

[somegrumpynerd]

If I could get better at website coding stuff I would love to make a neocities site that's just like, bitty sightings. Like I'll make a couple to get it going but I would love for other peope to be able to submit pictures of bitties in real places like we're documenting a rare species or something

[oh-meow-swirls]

i think this was funnier in my head.

[gatheringkeepsakes]

does anyone have a link to that one post on here about Falin and the butterfly/caterpillar symbolism?

[figofswords]

the post grad why did i get an art degree what am i even doing what do i want in life where am i going crisis has finally hit i want to. lie down in the dirt. or something

[sysig]

maybe you should doodle however many or few starcon/helix/damned characters as you like (in human or alien form) in cute halloween costumes! imagine... ZEX dressed up as Ariel thelittlemermaid...

Day 26 - "I hadn't realized humans also had aquatic subcultures!" "Oh, well, uhm..."

[sundial-bee-scribbles]

trying to psych myself up to finally do oc refs by doing fandom-related refs instead: volume 1

wanted to update my yuma from whatever tf this au is so he was a bit more unique... takes inspo from a lot of different things while also trying to be its own sorta thing? which is fitting given the au ;)

bonus chibi now that i'm also figuring out how tf to do chibis lol:

[babacontainsmultitudes]

Over The Garden Wall but instead of Wirt and Greg it's Grant and Paeden that's it that's all I needed to say thank you