#i hate this guy so much i am so glad he gets brutally murdered

[cagesings]

reading  the  score  and  finding  quotes  so  this  is  your  daily  reminder  that  turpin  can  go  die  in  a   pit

[brendankissesguys]

WHY AM I LIKE THIS WHAT THE HELL WHAT AJHHHHHJSBDOSBDISSBJNZNSKSBXKXJZKAB(I rank saw movies, except Saw X, below btw)

Hi. (Randomness below) TW: OPINIONS😰😰😰, I start to get more ranty about the lower placed movies as it's easier to think about the flaws in the movie and explain that rather than the things I enjoyed, really ranting and opinion based.

Anyways I (somehow) just got into Saw a few weeks ago and I've watched every movie in the series except Saw X. So I feel like I want to sit here and rate them. Thank you. (Saw 0.5 will be included idc what you say)

1: Saw (2004). Shall forever be #1, it's too good and also Adam is in that movie and I LOVE Adam. I FEEL Adam on a personal level. Amanda's introduction, Tapp's obsession with Lawrence, Zep as a character in whole, THE PLOT TWIST?!?!?! Love it. Favorite trap has got to be the Reverse Bear Trap, ofc. No words, it was just great.

2: Saw ll (2005). Daniel and Amanda. God. All the characters in the nerve gas house were so interesting and (hot) also very annoying(Xavier). Another insane plot twist, it just feels wrong to not put this film in the top two. Favorite trap in this one is Needle Pit, I'm basic, I know.

3: Saw V (2008) I love Mallick, Brit, Peter, AND Hoffman. Though, I also did love that the game between the five was really winnable for them all. Characters were intriguing, the whole Hoffman and Strahm thing was interesting. Coffinshipping for life. Favorite trap was Water Cube 100%.

4: Saw 0.5 (2003). I really like Leigh Whannell. It's short, simple, gets through the point of what these movies were going to bring. It started it all. AND it still manages to be better than some movies (*cough* Spiral *cough*)

5: Saw lll (2006). I don't feel this one should be so low yet, in my opinion, it isn't just as rememberable as the ones above it (if taking out 0.5 than it's definitely 4). Characters were good, Amanda, Lynn, I didn't hate Jeff as much as I saw others did. Amanda's whole test was great, though Hoffman's letter did piss me off 🫶🏻. Best Trap, imo, was the Freezer one. I felt so bad for the poor women. This one happening the same time as four was something I didn't realize at all till way afterwards yet it's intriguing.

6: Saw lV (2007). Hoffman in the chair did something to me... Jill was also here so that's a pro. Gosh Rigg was a great option for the main trap. I was spoiled that Hoffman was a jigsaw apprentice before I even watched Saw (2004) though I know I would've been shocked as shit because I'm oblivious and don't catch on quick. Fav trap is the one where that shithead in the wife beater got brutally murdered because I hate him with my entire heart and it was satisfying watching the character get what he deserved. ♥.

7: Jigsaw. I won't lie, I really liked this movie. After watching Spiral this was refreshing. I liked Logan Nelson and his character. They pulled a Saw ll with the whole not happening at the same time thing and I liked that. Movie felt paced well and did get a few shocked noises from me. Mitch being lowered into spinning blades and having to reach for the breaker was my fav trap. Anna made me unnecessarily mad the entire movie and I didn't know why till the end where I had a reason to hate her.

8: Saw Vl (2009). Rodrick. I was stuck on that for a good portion of the movie. I liked all the traps and the characters were well played. Brent was a badass character and I'm glad William got what he deserved in the end. The Shotgun Carousel was the most interesting trap to me. The final dude who said "You look me in the eye while you kill me!", Or something along those lines, was just rememberable to me. Also the time where I started to notice that these games the others are put into aren't really fair for them, they're out into the lives of this one guy who's being punished. Which is why the end where he's killed is so satisfying for me, he's not in control of the games like the last few. Just like the people he killed. He wasn't given a choice on if he'd live or die, just like how the people he let go from his company didn't have a choice if they'd live or die. For as low as this is ranked I really did love it.

9: Saw 3D. Lawrence😍. I love Lawrence Gordon and I feel it's the best thing that makes up for 3D. I liked Hoffman, yet I also liked how his ass was chained at the end. The way he escaped the bear trap was satisfying and not even a way I could ever think of. Gibson was a...interesting character. Not really, he felt real thrown into the plot just to be there and sometimes his acting brought me out of the movie for some reason. I'm sorry it just did. Joyce my queen didn't deserve her death༎ຶ⁠‿⁠༎ຶ. The traps were creative and Bobby not being able to save anyone, including himself from my assumptions, was a very interesting choice for his character. Shows he wasn't fit to survive Jigsaw. Fav trap was The Hangman's Noose.

10: Spiral: From the Book of Saw. I didn't like this movie when I compared it to the rest movies. I feel if this wasn't made to be kinda connected to Saw it could stand good alone. It's an okay movie if you watch it and try to act like it is it's own movie. Though when compared to the others I can't help but feel it lacked what the main movies did, the characters. They all felt very 2d and flat, especially the cops who just hung around yet were supposed to be 'involved' in the case. The wife jokes weren't too funny to me. Though I did enjoy Chris Rock and Max Minghella's characters. Despite this being last, I understand this one really was supposed to be more separate from Saw, hence the name. I liked the dad's trap, and not the one where his blood is being drained, but the one that puppeteers him to look like the pig from the video. That little foreshadowing was something I didn't catch in the movie of predictabilities and I liked it. Best trap was The Hot Wax Trap, it was just so cruel it shocked me.

[pearblossommina]

ToG Read-a-Long, Queen of Shadows, day 7

Ch 38

Learning Lysandra’s a shapeshifter is kind of cool, but also, all of a sudden I feel like I’m reading Crescent City

Hopefully they can free magic soon so she can transform into the fanged, clawed beast she once was.

Ch39

The interrogation of Stevan, even though he’s begging for death, gives me a lot of hope.

Aw my little heart, when they visit Sam’s grave. I never thought maybe Sam was her mate. (Personally I think it was Nehemia; but Sam was also loved by her once, and since she said she’s not interested in women, it makes more sense for it to have been him.) I wonder if in this world you can have more than one mate. If not, in some ways, it’s better to be human, since your heart can heal and you can fall in love as many times as you want.

I think I like falling in love more than being mates, anyway. It’s more meaningful, if you get to decide for yourself who you love, than leaving it up to fate or god or some cauldron.

Anyway. I’m really rooting for Aelin and Rowan to fall in love. I feel like they’re already 90% of the way there, and it’s not gonna take much, to push them over the edge

Ch40

Is spooky

Elide is a friend of Aelin’s too! The part where she was talking about dreaming of her one day coming to rescue her, y’all, this girl reads so gay, and I love her.

Ch41

I’m glad both of the boys are here and I’m glad Aedion wants to kill Arobynn but I want Aelin to be the one to do it. She deserves to brutally ruthlessly murder that man and it would be a very meaningful death for her.

I love how sexy she is in her dress

I love to see Rowan pining for her!

Ch42

Arobynn is a twisted mf

Flirting quietly with ROWAN ~ flirt flirt mind flirt~ you two! <3 will you please consummate. PLEASE

Ch43

She died her hair red to impersonate Arobynn, lol.

Ok, I hate him, but like, yeah, I guess it is kinda cool that he morphed her into a badass. What would she have become, if it weren’t for the assassin’s guild? (Still hate him tho)

OOOH that mother fucker

Ch44

I guess I fell for it, too. Man. The Valg commander getting his ring finger sliced off gave me a small bright moment of hope, and yeah, i was thinking about Dorian. But I guess I know that doesn’t work now, because he still seemed to be possessed by his demon even after losing the ring. Unless he was faking that, too?

Arobynn is such a SLEAZE.

“All this time i thought it would be a relief, a joy to end him. But all I feel is hollow. And tired.” Aw baby no

You should be dancing on his fucking grave

ALL SYSTEMS GO IT’S TIME TO GET ROMANTIC

“Don’t do that. Don’t - touch me like that.”

Rowan quit sending mixed signals, you’re centuries years old and she’s a fucking teenager, you have to spell it out or she’s gonna get her feelings hurt, boy. Don’t be rude. Just tell her you’re not ready/that you have reservations about bedding your Queen/that you want to feel a little safer in the world before you can initiate something romantic/whatever. Don’t you dare phrase it like that or she’s gonna think you’re not interested, YOU DUMMY

“A gift, she knew - a gift from the queen who had nothing else to give a no-name whore with a sad story.” Lysandra! Girl, don’t ever let me hear you using words like that about yourself again. Please be kind to yourself! There’s no shame in your profession and Aelin is not better than you just because she’s a queen. You are a star and I am rooting for you.

LET’S GO.

Murder that guy, show no mercy!!!!

[llycaons]

ep32 (1/3): *through tears* xiao zhan is really good in this one

dude this entire sequence is so heartbreaking I don't even care how wwx got into jinlintai. he's a genius I'm sure it wasn;t hard. but like! him being on the outside looking in! excluded! seeing his sister in horrible pain and knowing HE's the one who did that to her. desperately wanting to comfort her but what can he even say!!

xl was so fucking good this episode. that is the face of a woman ravaged by grief but desperately keeping it together

jzx rly got fridged for a woman who got fridged immediately afterwards. not even significant enough for a firsthand fridging

I don't much care about jzx's death, but this line is heartbreaking

oh my god and his mom leaving and then breaking down when she's out of earshot of jyl. fucking brutal. her actress did amazing. there's so much grief here.

this scene had me in tears what can you even say look at their FACES

and ofc wwx is out of mind with grief, probably hasn't eaten or slept in days, continually dogged by the resentful spirits he's commanding, seeing visions of his sister who he loves more than anything else in this world....fuck

and he wasn't even able to tell her to her face! and when he reached out she vanished! DEVASTATING. the fact that they both had visions of each other because they were so terrified/heartbroken about the thought of losing each other or of hurting each other. fuck

we don't see wwx grab his abdomen like that often. assuming the resentful energy is acting up and hurting him without a core to mitigate the effects

and here wwx is stone cold. cutting, callous, vengeful. it's quite a different aspect of him, one that I don't think we've ever seen before, not to this extent. we've seen him taunting and angry before, but this icy rage is terrifying. and it's wrong, on him. this isn't how he's supposed to be

that look alone. whew

even through it all he's so funny ugh. nobody did it like him

CHILLING. go get em wwx

the bodies of the wens are shown hanging here too, but they made me sad so I didn't get pics

'5000 cultivators'

you know what I love? the music swelling here is so heroic. epic and sweeping, clearly telling the tale of great warrior sects who joined to defeat a dark and devious evil. wwx appearing on the roof of the building laughing is a scene out of a far more simplistic wuxia. one where the good guys really are the majority and the people in power really do care about justice, the villains outliers and outcasts, cruel and shameless and unapologetic. the stage is being set so perfectly for the confrontation that will happen in a few hours, the one we saw at the beginning of the show. but we know at this point that there's so much more nuance than was initially presented

oh shut the fuck up. stop having a moment I hate you two

jc looks pretty upset this episode but until jyl runs in he doesn't do much besides look distressed.

YOU MURDERED LIKE 50 INNOCENT PEOPLE YOU FUCK.

I guess technically jgs is also in mourning but I don't give a shit about his grief and I'm glad that nobody else does either

godddd fuck wen qing 🥺 yeah jc you think about the consequences of your decisions

not that this is all jc's fault but I hope he feels guilty. though...based on how he acts postcanon, any guilt he's ever harbored has been either overshadowed by his rage and grief, or simply pushed aside since he doesn't want to confront the fact that maybe he could have acted differently

looking disapproving and somber is also not helping. god you're all so useless

tho man. at this point I don't think much could be done

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN. oh right he was running to BM and then running back to CR with a-yuan. but literally this entire showdown takes so long I am shocked he doesn't arrive to the pledge sooner

THERE HE IS!!!!! appearing like a nightmare on a moonlit night, slouched arrogantly, appearing every inch the villain they call him. ah. delicious

I love this scene so much because 1. it some of the most banger lines in anything I've ever seen and 2. wwx has been fairly unrestrained before but this is him at PEAK not-giving-a-shit. he's fully unleashing, giving just as good as he gets. I'm sure through the haze of grief and anger he was somewhat satisfied

he's just so horrifically alone up there

oh shut the fuck up nie mingjue

the white paint they put on his face makes him look SO good im sorry my love i know you're having a mental breakdown but you look so so cool and ethereal and sexy rn

OH OHHHHH. okay I get it now. wen ning and wen qing went to turn themselves in. the other wens went along NOT to turn themselves in, but just to witness, and they were murdered too. still very stupid, but not as dumb as I thought initially

a lot of the dialogue in this show is delivered via rhetorical questions. I'm sure it makes it hard to write fic that sounds accurate. I've certainly never read anything with the exact cadence of canon

[m4rs-ex3]

ok ok

(in no particular order)

finnegrin's wake come on guys. it's everything. we got to see callum pushed to his limit. we got to see truly just how much he loves rayla, which like we could've told you that would happen but god it means so much more to actually see it. we got to see soren turning his trauma into love. it's a sort of isolated incident and yet it's so important. it came out of nowhere (not in like a bad writing way) to fuck these characters up forever. callum was beat and electrocuted and we got to hear his cries and see his wounds. soren is beaten and appropriately bloodied, too. rayla is brutally tortured and screaming in agony, only to be tied up and nearly eaten alive. the emotional damage is somehow even worse than the physical. like. it's still not real to me and yet i am so fucking glad it exists. holy shit

moment of truth AUGHGGGGGGGGGGHG <- double meaning. well first of all we have callum reaching into the deepest depths of his soul, for the thing that makes him who he is, and finding rayla like fucking end my life. and then obviously him realizing oh my god i love her more than anything in the world and admitting that if he could redo it, he would've told her that the second she came back. and then they make out. and THEN... episode 7 happens and absolutely nothing of interest in between. obviously. and then on the other hand there's viren with some of the hardest-hitting shit in the entire show. seeing viren whole-heartedly loving soren so much that it destroyed him and their relationship. seeing viren's love get twisted into what made him assault his wife and essentially murder his mentor. listening to viren saying everything you want to hear - that he truly loved soren, that he truly loved his wife, that he knows he's a monster for what he did, that he took it out on soren and he hates himself for it, that he's sorry - and yet that doesn't make it hurt any less. holy shit pt. 2

bonus bc 2 is a weird number for a list: breaking the seal like i feel that we don't talk about how BATSHIT INSANE harrow's lady justice monologue is. like in combination with aanya this episode has some of if not the most based lines in the show. or ever. holy shit pt. 3

8 Days til Season 7!

If you had to pick a favorite episode (or a favorite few!), what would you pick? Why?

[razrbladekiss]

Tyrants | Chapter Four - Peril

WORD COUNT: 5.1k

WARNINGS: Mentions of death, drug use, Tig being Tig. The usual SOA shit. Sorry Donna..

She always saw the beauty in darkness. The lugubrious belle that came alongside the moon and stars and whatever else lurked amidst the murk of nighttime.

Isla was cliche in that sense.

She was cliche in the sense that she adored watching the sun set, swallowed by the mountains and high-rise buildings as the evening fell and Charming was painted black.

And maybe it was mostly melancholic because of the horrors that swathed that small town, but it was still beautiful nonetheless.

She still liked to bask in the scenery, to discern the marvel of her home, from the highest point she could access. And, sometimes, she liked to take somebody along with her so she wasn't completely alone.

"Why'd you still come up here?" Ope asked, pulling himself onto the roof as she sat with her back to the wall--puffing on a cigarette.

"Because it's quiet." She was content, comfortable with her response. "And whenever I'm looking for Jax, or Gem, or my dad--or they're looking for me--this is where we're almost always found. Just people watching, or reminiscing, or having a few minutes to ourselves away from the chaos downstairs."

It wasn't an unknown safe space--Gemma had told her that JT and Clay would climb up there during the earliest days of the club--but it was special.

Jax, Opie, and Isla spent time up there as kids, too. Because they were bastards and were always running from their fathers--and den mother--and the roof of the clubhouse was their go-to.

She never really got out of that habit. She'd spend hours up there if she could, just watching as Charming bustled beneath her. And she liked that it was separate to the garage, but everyone knew where to find her if they needed her.

"It clears your head, being up here." She added. "I have got so much shit going on right now--between work, and my personal life--but coming up here is like a refreshment, I guess."

Opie understood what she meant because he was also seeking comfort in the night. Riding through dusk, spending time alone on his bike as he cruised the streets of his quaint town, relishing in the darkness because it was strangely comforting to him.

He liked to be alone. His thoughts were brutal and they seared his brain left and fucking right, but he liked his own company.

"Wish I thought about comin' up here when I was released from holding." The man chuckled, balancing a cigarette between his lips. "Stahl grilled the fuck outta me."

"She did?"

"Yeah. She really fuckin' did." He added, grunting as smoke blew from his nostrils. "Did she get you? I know she got Gemma."

"Nope, she didn't. I don't know why, though. She interrogated everyone else. Starting to feel a little left out."

Opie chuckled, smiling a bit. "Be glad. It's obvious that she's used to getting what she wants."

"And did you give it to her?"

"Fuck no." Isla smiled. Proud. "She can cross-examine me all she fuckin' wants—I'll never sell the club out."

"They know that, Ope."

"I know." Half confidently, he nodded. "Just—Stahl made me second guess it all, y'know?"

Nobody in Charming--aside from the PD--knew where that despicable bitch came from, and nobody cared to ask.

What they did know, though, was that she had her heart set on making that town a living fucking hell as she strived to eradicate the Sons of Anarchy by getting to its members.

She'd grilled everyone she could've. She cornered Gemma when she was out running errands, leaving the grocery store with a sour taste in her mouth when Teller told her where to fucking shove it.

Same went for Jax, and Clay, and Chibs, and Tig, and...Well, all of them told her to get fucked, actually.

None of them caved. None of them wanted to sell the club out because there was no reason to.

Well, there was a reason to, but no desire to.

There'd been murders. Three, to be specific. And one of them just happened to be a police officer--which was quite unlucky, but it wasn't awful.

They hated cops.

What they hated more, however, was the idea of getting caught by them. And Clay was. Somehow, anyway.

Piney's old "friend"--Nate Meineke--needed quality, albeit illegal, guns with no traceability to attack the convoy that was transporting one of his friends from point A to point B. And it went as swimmingly as possible...

Until June Stahl was put on the case and found that idiot's phone at the scene after dropping it mid-ambush.

Clay just happened to be the last person he had called. Which then caused the investigation to point toward Charming.

They all knew the Sons were guilty of supplying those weapons. Who else would it have been? They were known for running illegal firearms without batch numbers from a quaint Californian town whose name didn't quite fit its image.

It was blatant, though nobody gave it up.

But Stahl tried her damndest to get answers. And when she didn't, she targeted the member that she saw to be the most vulnerable--after a hit went wrong and he failed to cover his tracks--and Opie just happened to be that guy.

She questioned him for hours. She practically held the man captive in that little cell until he caved. But he didn't--and he wasn't going to, either.

He was loyal. That's one of the reasons why Jax wanted to patch him back in.

"Yeah, I know." Isla got to her feet when she heard Tig yelling for her downstairs. "But you're the strongest guy I know, Ope. I don't think Stahl, of all people, is gonna get to you."

He shrugged her off, flicking the butt of his cigarette to the gravelly ground of the roof.

Opie had changed. Not much, and it wasn't very apparent, but he'd changed. Chino had changed him, she thought.

He was still dedicated to his club, still in love with the reaper and the responsibility that came with the patch--but Opie Winston lacked that flicker of enthusiasm now.

"How does your dad feel about you being back at the table?"

"Said he's proud of me."

He was a man of very, very few words. But the tone that he took--the sheer relief twined into contentment--spoke a greater volume.

Piney would always support his son, feel a sense of gratification from his involvement in the club. And, of course, Ope felt grateful to be back--but it was different now.

He'd served time for his club. Donna consistently argued that they sold him out and that he was fucking stupid for running back into the arms of SAMCRO.

But it was his brotherhood. The Sons of Anarchy were his family--his lifeline. He was nothing if not blessed to be patched back in.

"And I guess that wife of yours isn't too happy about it?"

"How'd you reach that conclusion?"

"Well," she ignored that Tig was waiting for her, standing directly in front of him. "If she was genuinely thrilled about you being back here, she'd have been coming to Gemma's dinners, and spending more time at the clubhouse with us. But she isn't, and I'm starting to realize that she probably hates me now."

His head shook. "She doesn't hate you. It's just...It's just raw. Weird being back, I think."

"She didn't even have to leave. She knows that."

Donna did know that. But there was always something about Gemma. About the way she let things slide so often, how she felt that she had Clay so pussy whipped that he'd be at her every beck and call--but, really, that was redundant. Because Gemma let him get away with fucking murder.

Literally.

"Is she gonna be there tonight?

"Of course. She wouldn't miss Jax's son coming home." He got up, reaching for her hands. "Sorry that she's been so distant with you, Isla. But she's just been stressed out--money worries and the kids and stuff, y'know?"

"Yeah, I know."

Donna wasn't traditionally a worrier. But five years worth of finances, being a single mom, and fretting over her husband potentially not making it out of prison alive, just did that to a woman.

"Anything I can do to help?"

"I don't think so." Grateful for her offering, though recognizing how damn stubborn his wife was, he conceded. "Thanks, though."

"Anytime. And if you change your mind, or need me, you know where I am--"

"Isla!"

"He is getting on my last fucking nerve today." She groaned, flipping Tig off as she looked over the ledge. "I'm coming! Give me a minute!"

"I've given you plenty of minutes! Just get your ass down here!"

"Just go," Ope chuckled, leaning down to peck her cheek. "We can have this talk another time."

Isla turned back to him, frowning. "Are you sure?"

"Absolutely. Go 'n talk to him--I'll see you tonight."

He was such a nice guy. So considerate, kind.

She loved him a lot.

The flouncy sundress rose to the middle of her thighs as she sauntered through the clubhouse, hearing Trager talking--rather conspicuously, though slightly muffled--to somebody on his cell.

"C'mon, Tiggy. Why'd you yell at me?"

He waved his hand to shut her up, gesturing for the blonde to follow him out of the clubhouse and toward his bike.

"Yeah, cool. K, brother--see 'ya later. Bye." He hung up and slid the phone into the pocket of his cut, swiveling to face Isla with a smile. "You ready?"

"For what?"

"The party?" Tig told her, watching confusion sweep over her face. "I'm taking you over 'cuz you want a drink and don't wanna drive home after? And that you're probably gonna end up heading home with Juice, or something--"

"Juice?"

"It always happens," he shrugged, pointing at the helmet he set out for her at the back of his bike. "We all head out, you get too drunk, you take a liking to Juicy, and you try to ride his dick."

"What?" Isla got herself situated behind him as he got on first, her arms wound around his waist. "That was one time. I've only slept with him once, and I told you it'd never happen again."

"And why is that?"

Her cheeks flushed red, the engine revving sending vibrations through her entire frame.

"Because he was too gentle." Tig's foot collided with the kickstand.

"And the little Catholic girl likes it rough."

She felt the solid gold crucifix burning a hole into her chest.

"Yes. I like it rough." He groaned, leaning into her. She swatted at his chest over his shoulder, laughing heartily. "Just take me to see the baby, dickhead."

The bike sped out of the lot and Isla was loving the thrill of being on two wheels. She'd always liked being stuck to the back of somebody's Harley--but she'd never own one herself.

Isla was like Gemma. She felt stable enough riding with somebody, but riding alone--being in control of the motorcycle--was fucking terrifying.

Jax and Opie had encouraged her to take a ride at one point, but it didn't end very well, and Chibs spent the best part of two hours trying to stitch his daughter back up whilst Gemma castigated the two imbeciles who thought it was even reminiscent of a good idea.

Weaving through traffic gracefully, freely, was appealing to her, however. But she wouldn't be caught dead--alone--on a fucking bike.

Plus, she quite enjoyed being taken places. Escorted by a member of the club. It was safe.

The wind whirred and whipped around them, and she wished she didn't make the effort with her hair tonight. It was ruined, tousled to within an inch of its life, and she dreaded the thought of having to brush the knots out in Jax's bathroom.

Still, commuting via Harley was a hell of a lot quicker and had a few more benefits than commuting via car.

But the looks that they got were piercing. Horrible. Mainly from Hale stationed beside his squad car, watching as Isla and Tig raced down the freeway.

"He likes you." He spoke over the roaring engine when he hit the first stop light all night. "He hates that you've never given him a chance--"

"He's a cop, and I'm the outlaw's daughter. I've been raised to hate his kind."

Tig nodded his approval, setting off once again when the light switched to green and all opposing traffic stood still.

At one strange point in time, David Hale had his sights set on Isla Telford. He was in love with her. Completely besotted.

And she never gave him a second glance because, for one, she wasn't interested. He hated that she was so close to Jax and Opie, but not him, and he wished that she'd push herself away from the bad guys to grow closer to the heroic law-enforcer.

But he was a control freak above everything else, and Isla was just a free-spirit. She was loyal to her friends and family but she didn't want to get tied down, and she didn't want to become friendly with a fucking cop.

The only cop she liked was crooked. And Unser was in a similar spot to her--a little too affiliated with SAMCRO, but not completely doted on. Though, they were both strangely essential fixtures, and Clay would've been lost without them.

"Juice is here." Tig taunted as he helped her off the bike, holding her hand when she stumbled over herself a little. "Try to keep those panties on."

"Can't make any promises, Tiger." Her growl was seductive, though he knew that she was fucking with him.

She'd given up rebuking his claims, instead feeding into them because, with Trager, she couldn't seem to win. He was sleazy, and she loved that back and forth.

What she loved more, though, was that he was comfortable. He was a strange man, and nobody really understood just where he came from, but Isla liked that she could make jokes of any kind around him. He was easy to get along with. Easy to love.

And, man, did she love Alex Trager.

"If you do fuck him, though, would you make a video?"

Isla stepped into Jax's front room, turning on her heels. "Who said that we haven't already got one?"

She chuckled and wandered into the party, leaving Tig with a few convoluted thoughts and even more raunchy questions.

"Fuck. Gemma taught her well." He grumbled under his breath, reaching for the beer in Half-Sack's hand.

He slumped on the couch, motioning for his usual lay to sit in his lap as he watched Juice fawn over his little blonde friend making conversation with some other random woman already.

"Yeah, totally..." she agreed with whatever the girl was saying, but her eyes were glued on Tara. Just floating around the party.

She felt bad that the doctor was alone. Despite all that she thought of her, being out of ones depth in such an intimidating setting wasn't very nice. And Isla was an empath.

"D'ya think anyone 'round here has any nail glue?"

"Gemma might." She smiled, pointing toward the kitchen.

Grateful that she managed to shake that one off, Isla weaved through the small conclave and sat beside Tara, offering a friendly face during a time of such discomfiture.

Her heart was aching, the sheer nervousness was palpable, and she knew that Tara felt the same way too.

But Isla just sucked it up. Because she wanted to talk to her, and had to be the one to initiate it.

"Thanks for coming." Her smile was wide, genuine.

She offered a beer to the brunette, hoping that she'd take it.

"Thanks for asking me here." Tara accepted it, glad that Isla remembered she wasn't particularly a wine girl like herself.

Christ. This is awkward.

"Trust me, you were the first person I asked to come tonight."

"How so?"

"Well," a little bit more comfortably, she faced her completely, "you've literally nursed Abel back to health. You've been there every step of the way. You've been the best surgeon. And, as much as I hate to say it, you helped Wendy so much, Tara. I'm really thankful for all that you've done for this family."

"It's my job." She tried to brush the comments off, but her heart definitely fluttered at the praise.

Isla never changed. She was still the sweetest soul, she thought.

"I know, but you've had it rough with this lot--with Gemma, I mean."

"She isn't anything I can't handle." Confidently, she asserted.

"I know, and I'm glad that you're able to stand your ground." Reluctant, a hand landed against Tara's palm.

She jolted a little bit, but softened into the embrace.

It was comfy, warm. Prosperous, perhaps, because it meant something. Tara not jerking away and leaving once Isla offered a friendly embrace, was promising.

They spoke about the baby for a little while, and shared a few laughs at Tig's expense. It was strange, really. To be talking to her ex-best friend was strange, but she'd missed it.

Donna joined the mix, too, and it was starting to feel like old times. Isla recognized that they'd never slip back into that routine, the dedication to one another that they'd known when they were kids--but it was nice.

The conversation stuttered and it wasn't able to flow as freely as what she might've liked, but it was a start.

To know that she had something resembling an acquaintanceship with two women she admired, was nice.

And Jax introducing his baby to his brand new home, to his extended family that were already so fucking dedicated to him, was just the most wonderful thing ever.

"What about a beer?" Clay joked, holding the bottle close to Abel. Jax laughed, though he shook his hand away. "What? Grandpa can't give him his first beer?"

"No, he can't."

"I'll take it, though. If you're offerin'." Chibs grabbed the Budweiser and twisted the cap with the leather grip of his glove.

He gestured to Isla, tipping it toward her. "Want some?"

"No, you're alright." She went back to her wine, smiling at that little bundle of happiness in Jax's arms, wondering how the hell he'd gotten to be in this position now.

But it was because of Tara. Her commitment, her talent, and sheer want to help that angel through the roughest patch that a baby could have possibly been thrust into.

How Gemma could still loathe that girl--after everything she did--was beyond her completely.

Tara was the unlikeliest hero in Abel's story.

"Why is it that every time I see you, your highlights get more chunky?" Gemma smiled at the comment, turning to see her favorite girl, flaunting the most beautiful smile.

She handed Isla the bottle of whatever wine Chibs could get this evening, unable to quit beaming at the thought of her grandson finally being at home. Where he belonged.

"I told you I'd do them for you, Gem."

"I know," she nodded, playing with a few strands of hair, "I was gonna ask you, but you've been a little distant this week--didn't wanna add to your workload, baby."

"That's super considerate of you. Are you alright?" Isla teased, holding a hand to Gemma's forehead.

She slapped it away with a laugh. "Fuck you. I'm always considerate."

"Sure you are. That's why Wendy is here, right?"

"No," her head shook, "she's here 'cuz this is her house. If I had it my way, she'd be out on her ass faster than what you could even say 'crank whore.'"

Isla wiped at her lips with the back of her hand, tipping her head toward the blonde in the living room.

"I thought you made sure she was gonna be here tonight?" Confused, she quizzed.

She was under the impression that Wendy was starting to grow on her. After she'd tried to kill her, of course.

"I did," Gem confirmed. "But only because I knew it'd be awkward between her and Tara."

Amazed, or maybe fucking horrified, Isla simply glared at her.

It should've been obvious to her--plain as day--that Gemma Teller doing a good thing was simply a bullshit facade, built in order to take away from the fact she wanted to do an inherently bad thing.

But Isla liked to see the good in people, so it wasn't. And that really was one of her mot fatal flaws.

"She thanked me for letting her stay, too."

"And what'd you say to her?" Almost as if she didn't want to know the answer, she asked.

Black nails danced along the rim of her wine glass as she leaned against the counter, watching everybody enjoy themselves as they bitched and moaned.

"That she's lucky to be alive."

"Jesus, Gem," her head shook disparagingly, disappointed perhaps.

But being surprised that the woman made a threatening comment toward Wendy, was just as stupid as being surprised at Tig for fucking another hooker during his free time.

"You've gotta keep her close, ma. She's the mother of your grandson, the woman your son did love at one point."

Ma. The word rolled off her tongue unintentionally most of the time, but she didn't hate it.

Gemma was the mother figure in her life--hell, she was the mother figure in a few of the Sons' lives--and it didn't feel weird using that around her. It was affectionate. She adored it.

"Jax never loved her," matter of fact, she retorted. "They got drunk together. They smoked dope together. They didn't love one another--"

"They got married." Isla reminded her. "They have a kid together. They have a lot of history."

"Just because they have history, doesn't mean they love one another. You've got history with him."

Her chuckle was throaty, almost a full-on splutter. "We have not got that same history--we're friends, Gem, you know that's different."

She supposed the blonde was right.

There was hell of a contrast between friends for life and friends with benefits--and Gemma knew that. She just didn't like that Jax gravitated toward Wendy when he'd always had Isla right there in front of him.

Though, she was more than aware that the pair didn't look at each other that way--she still lauded the thought of the two together.

"I still hate her."

"I know," Isla laughed at Gemma's irritability, sipping on her wine, enjoying the sight of everybody having a damn good time.

"She's checking into rehab, too."

"Really? Where?"

"Some place in Oakland, I think." Gemma added, smiling at Clay when he wandered over to the pair. "But you didn't hear that from me."

"You think she's gonna stick to it?"

"Couldn't tell 'ya." He answered for his wife, leaning in to press a chaste kiss to Isla's cheek. "She's determined though, I'll give her that."

"Yeah?" His nod was optimistic--strange for Clay Morrow. "Well, I'm glad she's working on herself, anyway. She's got potential."

"You hate her."

"I know." She didn't refute the assertion. "But I'm still happy for her."

At least somebody is.

She wasn't lying. Wendy was a good girl, a woman tortured for no good reason. And she felt for her, she really did.

It'd been a shock, finding out that she was pregnant. But it wasn't like they weren't expecting it--what with the rate she and Jax were going at it.

From the start, Isla and Gemma were worried. She was notorious for her crank habit and the girls thought she was going to kill herself before she had the chance to see her son into the world.

And that almost happened, didn't it?

The doctors at St. Thomas were fucking miracle workers--Isla was on pins and needles waiting for a call to say that Wendy and Abel were okay.

But she tried not to dwell on that, now. They were both as healthy and Abel was as happy as he could've been, so Isla was content. She wasn't pleased, but she was comfortable with the way that things were going.

Tara, however.

"No!" She yelled, backing out of the nursery. "No, fuck you, Jax."

Juice stumbled backward when she nudged him out of the way, pulling her purse from the kitchen counter.

Isla and Gemma couldn't not stare.

"Tara, c'mon!" Jax called after her, but it was too late.

The front door had been slammed shut and the party came to a complete standstill. A thickening tension was shrouding the group, and things were only just starting to simmer.

"What was that all about?" The blonde asked Juice, leaning against the island.

She didn't want to prove Tig to be right but, after a few glasses of wine, Juan Carlos Ortiz was starting to pique her interests.

He swallowed thickly, watching Clay leave the room. "He said something about Wendy--wanting to keep whatever it is that he and Tara have going on the down low so it doesn't set her off, or something."

Makes sense.

"He has a point. She's doing really well lately." He continued. "Jax would hate to stunt her progress by shoving his relationship with Tara in her face."

Isla was rattled.

Jax hadn't talked to her in days, and she wasn't aware that so much had changed. She wasn't aware that he had established a relationship with Tara Knowles.

Again.

You know what they're like--like two fucking magnets or something. They always find a way back to one another.

She was too irritated to reside in that same room as Gemma, now. Knowing the conversation she'd initiate the second that Juice left was too fucking much. So she left first, instead.

The living room was almost empty. Just Clay, Bobby, Tig, and Chibs sat around the couches as Donna, the kids, and Ope were preparing to set off.

Everything was annoying her, now. She hadn't made the effort with Donna all night, but she was pissed that she hadn't started to say goodbye to her yet.

Isla was so fucking irritated that she didn't even want to talk to Tig, or her father. So she didn't.

"Where're you going, petal?" Chibs asked, hindering her plan to keep her mouth shut for the rest of the night. He knew that she'd crack a smile at the nickname.

"I was just wandering. Not really sure what to do with myself."

"Come sit down," he gestured to the space between himself and Tig, and wound an arm around her when she met the leather. "I've missed 'ya."

"Tonight? Or just in general."

"In general. It's been a few days, love."

"I know, I'm sorry." Her head rested against his Sgt. At Arms patch, and she sighed. "Work has been so fucking busy and I feel like I haven't gotten a moment to myself this week."

Isla only worked a part-time gig at some shitty salon just on the outskirts of Charming--edging into Stockton--but she hated her job.

She hated driving into the city every morning and evening, wasting a fuck ton of her paycheck on gas when, really, there was no point.

She hated her cunt boss.

Hated her cunt clients.

She hated that nobody really spoke to her because of who her father was. And when they did speak to her, it was almost like they were scared. Of Isla.

Gemma had always promised her that there was a space at the auto shop for her had she needed it, but she couldn't think of anything worse than having to answer to Gemma and Clay every single day.

Well, more than what she already was, anyway.

"Who'd 'a thought that being a hairdresser was so demanding?"

"Me, apparently." She joked, watching Tig get up and leave the room.

It'd turned somber. A little too bleak for her liking, but she guessed that everyone felt a bit awkward after Tara stamped out and Jax sat on his porch. Alone. With a bottle of whiskey.

She hated the hold that woman had over him sometimes. The way he was so fucking devoted to Tara Knowles that she could literally slap him, scream in his face, and ruin his son's homecoming party--and he would still pine for her.

She'd never understand that.

And she didn't understand how such a lively bunch of individuals had mellowed out over the course of two hours, either.

The party had disappeared. Dissipated into nothing and the atmosphere she once lauded was completely dead in the water.

It was fucking grim, and she couldn't wait to head home.

"Can I come with you tonight?"

"Why'd you even ask? Y'know you're welcome to come home with your old man whenever you want." Chibs told her a little bit stern, though it was essentially full of love.

She just smiled up at him, a bit buzzed. But she was having a good-ish time and who was he to chastise her for drinking a little too much tonight?

"Wanna head off now?"

"Yeah--lemme just say 'bye' to Gemma."

"Alright, I'll be out front. Don't forget your purse." He reminded, knowing she was too ditsy for her own good.

Chibs helped her to her feet, letting go of her hand only to part ways for a few moments.

Her mood was perking up, now. The prospect of being able to spend a few hours with her dad after a long fucking day, was just the best.

And she'd really missed him. Missed the time they once had an abundance of. Missed the evenings that they'd spend talking, drinking, watching movies, doing the generic father daughter activities.

They hadn't had that for a while, and it was truly a blessing that it was within reach tonight.

Well. It was within reach for all of five minutes.

"Oh my God--" Gemma's cell slipped from between black nails and bounced across the table. Saturated hues were locked on Isla, and her head shook.

"What?"

"There's--there's been an accident." She managed to muster out. "Or, maybe a drive-by, I don't know, but Donna--"

"Donna?" Piney's attention was snatched at the mention of his daughter-in-law. He stood up. "What about her?"

Isla knew the answer. She knew what Gemma was going to say because it was just the usual now, wasn't it?

Being affiliated with SAMCRO just did that to somebody. Man, woman, child. They didn't fucking care.

"She's--Piney, she's dead."

[iridescenceoflove]

Okay, I know I said I'll take what I got and still love the show—and I still really, really do—but the more I dwell on it and stew in my turmoil of feelings, the more...depressed I get about the ending. Honestly, it was just all kind of messy and underwhelming after so many good, fast-paced and resourceful episodes.

1. We already know everything wrong about Han Seo's end, I don't even need to hash it out. If you don't understand what was wrong with that... 🤷🏻‍♀️

2. I was okay with Cha Young getting shot for the protection of Vincenzo; cliched as it was, they still kept her pretty in character with the way she stood up against Han Seok while being held at gunpoint. However, they took it too far by having her get shot, just to simply stay in a hospital bed until the very end. No action for her, no behind the scenes work, no second party (what the hell was the point in that anyways?), just—reduced to an invalid in bed for saving the love of her life. After all she's done, after always wanting to be right up in the front lines. I know one of the issues with her getting shot was the overused setup for Vincenzo to reveal his feelings, and honestly, I didn't mind that. But that doesn't even work, because he doesn't. He clearly is worried for her and we know he loves her, yet it doesn't spur him to make any further move. Han Seok already killed his mother, it doesn't even add to the narrative of him having a loved one get hurt to do something. He would've still killed Han Seok brutally regardless if Cha Young had gotten hurt or not. She deserved to be a part of it all. And I don't mean the killing. She didn't have to hit the button. But she deserved a final line to Myung Hee at least since she's her father's murderer. I'm pretty sure the Geumga men got more action than she did.

3. Han Seok gathering a bunch of mercenaries seemed filler. It makes sense for the purpose of hiring people to kill Seung Hyuk, but they literally added nothing to the very mediocre face-off with the Geumga men. In fact, the face-off at the beginning of episode 19 with the whole Cassano family was way cooler and more dynamic than whatever you call that. How the hell did they even know specifically where to find Han Seok and his men? Vincenzo and Cho were the only ones aware of the tracking device anyways. I mean, I could've lived with that, except, why have them come fight? We know they can stand on their own, it's been very much established multiple times. The stabbing wasn't even done by one of the hired men, it was done by Han Seok. Just seemed really messy and unnecessary; simply there for the purpose of having some of the Geumga tenants have one last moment.

4. The whole Guillotine File thing had such a great setup. It seemed very anticlimactic just for Vincenzo to whip it out and tell Gi Seok to take it. Like, they made a huge deal of using it to take down everyone, he even says nobody but himself knows where it is, then whips it out to hand it over like nothing when he could've used it for, oh, I don't know, being pardoned so he doesn't have to leave for a whole year. Which—

5. A whole year? Come on, you just can't have me fall for the fact that this guy, whom even the Director pardoned for a bit of time, has to leave for a whole year with no way or alternative reason to come back for more than just one day because he has to sneak in with Italian delegates? I'm calling bullshit.

6. I love Vincenzo and Cha Young. They truly do love and deserve each other. But the ending for them? Nah. I hate the fact they pulled a CLOY, I really do. You're telling me Cha Young has to be content with spontaneous year to year visits or has to go visit an island in Malta to be with the one she loves? FUCK NO. I'm manifesting a completely different end for that, same with Han Seo, don't @ me.

7. Where the fuck was Inzaghi? He didn't even get to say goodbye in episode 18, seriously, what the fuck.

8. The gold storyline was okay. I'm glad they didn't leave loose ends, but it once again just didn't sit right after all the buildup. They moved it all to her house and she sleeps on a hard ass gold bar bed. Queen behavior, but still.

9. Bye Bye Balloon. We all wanted it. We didn't get it.

As you can see, the more I ramble, the less eloquent and structured my points become. All in all, did they tie most of the loose ends up? Yes. I'm glad they didn't kill Mr. Lee off, I would've been too pissed for words if that had happened along with Han Seo. In my opinion, they didn't leave an open ending, which would've made things ten times worse. And it really isn't the worst finale I've seen. Far from it, contrary to my points. It's just after so much anticipation, building, excitement, and truly amazing episodes, it fell very flat for a finale. Way more bittersweet than needed.

However, I will end on some good points because I don't want to ignore them either.

1. I love Han Seok's and Myung Hee's deaths. Absolutely love it, so much that somebody would probably deem me crazy for how much I enjoyed it. Myung Hee fire dancing to her zumba music was so poetically beautiful. Han Seok and all the references to Greek mythology or whatever as he's left for the birds was stunning. Both of them being cocky until they realize how miserable their deaths really are going to be was pure enjoyment for me. Nothing says satisfaction like watching the pure horror take place on their faces as they beg for Vincenzo to just end it instead. They really and truly did deliver with their deaths, and I am still shocked and pleasantly delighted with how they didn't shy away one bit with the brutality of it.

2. I'm glad they at least gave Cha Young her moment somewhat in the end. She got to take down the Tae ho lover and his mom in retribution for both Vincenzo's mom and her dad. Her sass and savagery in the end gave me the hint of original Cha Young I'd been craving for the whole episode. And the fact that she got to lead the Cassano Geumga family was great too (despite how cheesy that walk up and taunting of Kingmaker and his guys was).

3. I'm glad Gi Seok was promoted, and I'm especially glad he and Mr. Cho get to work together. Those two are the best and deserve everything.

4. As much as they could've really polished it, I'm glad Vincenzo and Cha Young got their moment. At that point, I think my standards and expectations were so low that I was blown away by their kiss. I didn't expect it at that point and thought we were going to be left with them walking off together. It was still a pleasant surprise, nonetheless.

5. I really do like what the monk said to Vincenzo. Wrapped up his feelings regarding his lifestyle very well, and I thought it was the perfect balance of philosophical and realistic as you could get. He needed to hear that, and I'm so glad he got some form of content and peace with who he is in the end.

6. I really love that they didn't stray away from Vincenzo truly being an anti-hero. He even refers to himself as a villain, and I'm glad they didn't try to gloss over that in the end just so it could look good morally. His take on justice is very...Vincenzo Cassano. Befitting.

I love this show still, would still recommend it, and would still do it all over again. I'm so glad I was able to be active in this fandom and see so many wonderful discussions, people, and analyses. I'm going to miss these weekends so badly.

[minetteskvareninova]

Thank y'all for participating! The results... Sure are something. Just a quick disclaimer: I wanted to make Bali one of the options, but he was left out as a favor for not annoying me too much throughout his stint on season 3. I don't think he'd win anyway, like I don't think he's anyone's least favourite? But don't worry I didn't forget him, and most certainly not what he did to Armin. Consider him a honorary mention in this competition.

And our winner is... Drumroll please... Ibrahim! Which surprised me even as someone who can't stand him. Like wow, he beat a supervillain, child murderer and Lütfi pasha, that's some trashiness! Part of this seems like echo chamber effect (fuck Ibrahim, all of my homies hate Ibrahim) and general atmosphere of appreciation for Nigar and Hürrem in our circles, but to be fair, not like he hasn't earned it. His treatment of Nigar alone is deserving of all the middle fingers he could get, not to mention his murder of Leo (along with an attempt at then-pregnant Hürrem's life), an affair that lasted for years, general hubris and douchebaggery (this man had a throne installed in his own living room, for crying out loud) and other things that I don't even remember. In short, a worthy denizen of superhell to be sure.

Süleyman should NOT be so far behind him but very well. His actual crimes aside, the consistency of his shitty, self-absorbed behavior puts him in my mind on par if not above Ibrahim. This man functions as such a perfect stealth (and, well, not-so-stealth at times) critique of absolute monarchy it sometimes feels like GRRM made him. At any rate, my mind is at peace knowing he and Ibrahim are in superhell together. Yay!

Speaking of superhell denizens! The bronze medal goes to my personal favourite, Lütfi pasha. Well, favourite in this competition, so you know. He has a lesser rap sheet than the rest of the guys here, but that's mostly a result of his shorter tenure on the show (half a season, less than any other of our contestants) and pure, unadulterated laziness. Otherwise he's guilty of brutal mutilation, persecution of sex workers and of course being a bad husband to Şah sultan, which as we all know is an executable offence. Good job, Lütfi, may your genitals also burn in superhell forever!

I didn't WANT to let Rüstem compete, but I need to be fair here. This guy was literally introduced with a Klingon Promotion and generally worked hard every second of his screentime to deserve his place in hell, from murders to casual douchebaggery towards anyone he doesn't suck up to. I am glad he didn't win (I assume because he's too cool and disapproved of by the narrative for us to hate him more than, say, Ibrahim), but still, he's one rotten bastard.

Lastly, we have everyone's least favourite elevated thug. *sad trombone* It's a shame that most of his crimes are purely offscreen, but the sheer dissonance between them and his self-righteous Diriliş Ertugrul reject pose should have earned him a higher position in this competition, I think. I assume that while everyone hates this guy, most of us just has someone they hate more than him, which, fair, that's the case with me as well.

Anyway, thank you for your participation, ladies, gents and the rest of the genders! It was a fun little thing we did here. More awards to come, possibly, whenever I fancy. Bye!

[jazy3]

Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 17X13

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Oh my gosh! Wow! There’s so much to say about this episode. I'm so glad that Meredith woke up and appears to be on the mend. As much as I loved the beach, I am ready for Meredith to rejoin society and the land of the living and get back to doing what she does best! I'm glad that Meredith got closure and that we as fans got closure too not just with Derek but with George as well. The beach wedding scene was perfect and the dialogue throughout was great.

I laughed out loud multiple times and Meredith and Derek’s scenes were both funny and bittersweet. I particularly liked Meredith and Derek's lines about how Meredith hates weddings, but Ellis hates the Post It Note story and wishes they had a big wedding. That she would give her that big wedding if she could. I felt like she was also saying she would give Derek that big wedding if she could. I also loved their conversation about Amelia. Derek told her what she needed to hear. Sometimes losing someone close to you at a young age makes you stronger and sometimes it turns you into Amelia.

Amelia has grown so much, but she spent most of her life a mentally unstable drug and alcohol addicted mess spiralling out of control in large part because she witnessed the brutal murder of her father at the age of five. And that’s not to say that Derek wasn’t just as screwed up by what happened to their Dad. He like Amelia became a neurosurgeon always chasing the high. He stayed in a loveless marriage he hated and when Addison cheated on him with Mark he moved to Seattle where he pretended to be single and pursued a relationship with Meredith.

Even after he and Meredith got together, he lied and cheated and repeated that pattern over and over again. First with Nurse Rose and then with Renee his research fellow in D.C. Derek could be selfish, cruel, hypocritical, and jealous. While Amelia’s scars and trauma were more obvious and blatant Derek was just as affected as she was it just showed up differently. Derek makes it clear he does not want that for Zola, Bailey, and Ellis and after talking to him Meredith realizes that she doesn’t either.

I loved seeing Meredith talk about how well Amelia is doing and Derek saying, “I know!” From the moment Derek on the beach I had a feeling they were going to talk about Amelia and the kids and all of that and I’m glad they did. One of my favourite moments of the episode was when Meredith told Derek that Ellis hates the Post It Note story and wishes they had a big wedding and Derek said, "She gets that from my mother!" I loved that they showed Ellis’ drawing on the fridge when Maggie is talking to Winston on the phone.

I love that Meredith and Derek got their beach wedding like Derek talked about in Season 5 when he made Meredith a bed in front of the fireplace. She went from never wanting to get married to marrying Derek on a Post It Note, getting legally married at the court house so that they could adopt Zola, and then marrying him on the beach in her COVID dream and giving Derek and Ellis the big wedding he always wanted and the one Ellis dreams of. So beautiful. I’m glad that they got closure and that Meredith decided to go back and that she knows Derek will be waiting for her when she’s ready, when it’s her time. When she’s old and senile and smelly just like they promised.

But now is not that time. She has kids to raise. Patients to treat. Sisters, friends, and family that need her. And a certain Irish doctor who would very much like to take her for a drink once she’s feeling better. I loved that Meredith realized through talking to Derek that even though her body was tired her soul was still fighting and that she needed to go back to her life. I loved her scene with Zola when she woke up and said, "We love you so much," meaning both her and Derek. That Mommy and Daddy love her so much and that’s why Meredith came back. She gave up on an afterlife with Derek to be with her children, friends, and family in the real world. That was so beautiful.

I loved Maggie's talk with Zola. I love that she took what Catherine gave her about screaming out your feelings and used it to help Zola who has been through so much express her emotions in a healthy way. I really felt Zola's heartbreak and how much she missed her Mom and Dad. I'm glad that Maggie decided to take Zola to visit Meredith. It was risky, but it paid off. The set department did a great job with Zola’s room. When she’s sitting on her bed crying you can see the photo of Meredith and Derek holding her at her first birthday party. You can also see a sock monkey that she had at the dream house.

The slop of the roof indicates that her room is in the attic. At last we saw it Lexie was living in there and Mark was visiting her while they were sneaking around, and it was an unfinished space with wood panelling. It appears that since that time as her family expanded Meredith had the attic finished and turned into a proper bedroom for Zola. We don’t know how big the attic is so it’s possible that there are more rooms up there or that there are more rooms upstairs than what we’ve seen.

I'm glad that Derek was there for Meredith in her time of need and helped her find the will to fight even though she was exhausted. I'm interested to see what's next for Meredith. If we'll see her being discharged in the coming weeks or if they will do a time jump. Will we see her at home with the kids first or back at work? Will her and Hayes finally have that drink? If so, how soon? I want to know more! I’m excited to see Maggie tell her about her engagement to Winston and see her meet Winston properly and get to know him. I’m also excited for what I’m sure will be an emotional scene when she thanks Amelia and Link for taking care of her kids while she’s been sick.

I’m also expecting some very emotional scenes with Richard and Bailey. I’m interested to see how they will address DeLuca’s death. I’d also like to see Jackson’s reaction when he returns from his most recent quest and finds out that Meredith has woken up and is doing better. I’d also like to see someone notify Cristina, Alex, Arizona, Callie, and April that Meredith is doing better. I can’t wait to see Hayes’ reaction to finding out that Meredith is on the mend! My heart!

Now let us turn our attention to the other shenanigans that were going on at Grey Sloan Memorial this week while Meredith was busying getting closure with Derek and waking up. We saw Teddy back at work trying her best to move forward. I was glad to see that she found a therapist that works for her even though it has to be virtual due to the pandemic. I'm glad that Owen was there for her. She really needs a friend right now and as Owen said previously, he's well placed to be that person. I like that he backed her up, but also pointed out that she would be destroyed if something went wrong with Meredith. That lead to her paging Winston to scrub in with her which I think was the right call.  

I think Owen did the right thing by rejecting her kiss but choosing to stay with her and let her cry and breakdown. She needs the support right now and while I’m not usually an Owen fan I think he did a good job supporting her this episode. I also really felt for him when he lost a patient he thought they were going to be able to discharge and struggled to tell the family. As he says to Teddy, they did this all the time during the way, but this is different. They are losing patients on a level that they’ve never experienced before, and they can’t even take a moment to catch their breath because they have more patients to treat and pronounce.

My heart breaks for the real life doctors and nurses who are dealing with stuff on a daily basis. It’s so hard. On a lighter note, I really loved Amelia and Link's patient storyline this week. It was funny and interesting, and it was great to see Amelia back in the OR. While it was wrong of Amelia to steal Link’s patient and I think she did overstep I understand why she was so eager to get back into the OR and she was right about what was wrong with the guy.

I understood Link’s anger and frustration, but I also appreciated that he understood Amelia and was there to support her and build her up. I like that he brought in Tom and had him on standby, but also showed complete confidence in Amelia. His line about how Amelia always likes to raise the stakes was hilarious and accurate. Another scene I loved was when Amelia and Link were leaving the hospital and Link thought she was using sexual innuendo and then she clarified that she needed to get home because her boobs felt like they were going to burst, and she needed to either pump or breastfeed. That one cracked me up!

We also saw some amazing acting by Caterina Scorsone when upon arriving home and finding Link’s parents looking after Bailey and Ellis, they rushed to the hospital thinking something was wrong with Meredith. Amelia was riding high from the surgery that day and when she thought Meredith had gotten worse, she panicked only to realize that Meredith’s condition hadn’t changed. Her sobbing and desperation as she said over and over again that she really needed Meredith to live were gut wrenching. Caterina did an amazing job.

I also really liked Bailey and Levi’s patient storyline. The peanut butter brittle woman who took up roller skating was the best! She was funny and helped Bailey see that you need to rest and also follow your joy. The scenes where the woman gave Levi the brittle and then he was smelling it made me laugh! As a result of treating that patient Bailey decided to reverse her earlier decision and let Jo switch specialities. While I’m not on board with that storyline I'm glad that Bailey decided to support Jo in following her joy. Making someone stay in a role they don't like will only make them resent you and make everyone involved unhappy.

That being said, I hate this career switching storyline. It’s so dumb. I've realized with this episode that my opinion on this storyline isn't ever going to change. If they use it as a segue for Jo adopting Luna that could be interesting, but watching Jo leave general surgery behind and re-specialize in OBGYN so she can stand on the sidelines while all the other characters do ground breaking work and cool procedures just seems dumb to me. I am not invested in this storyline at all.

Levi and Jo have great comedic timing which was on full display in this episode. Jackson was MIA this episode because he went roaring off on another one of his quests leaving the person he’s dating in the lurch and telling them about it after the fact. He took a leave of absence from work and then left Maggie a voicemail back in Season 15 telling her he needed some time to think and then went camping in the woods to look at trees which lead to him talking to April and texting a woman he met on this trip behind Maggie’s back. He then left her in the fog on a dark road in an area with bears at the end of Season 15.

Now he’s left Jo to go on an unknown quest that’s 11 hours away. When did Jackson become the guy that just vanishes at random to go do whatever the heck he wants? I was surprised that Nico asked Levi to move in with him at the end of the episode. That was not at all the answer that Levi was expecting so I understand why he ran off and said he promised Jo he'd do a movie night with her. Levi wanted to move in with Nico last season and Nico didn't want that, but instead of just saying that outright he dodged the topic and was a real jerk about it. That resulted in them breaking up and Levi moving in with Jo.

They only got back together because of the pandemic and in the intervening time Levi has grown as a person and no longer wants that kind of a relationship with Nico. When he told him that him leaving his bathroom bag at his place didn't mean he was going to move in with him he was being sincere. He just didn't want to have to keep carting his toothbrush back and forth all the time. In response Nico realized he's always running away from what scares him and pushing people away when they get too close and he wants to fix that, so he asked Levi to move in with him.

Therein lies their problem. They're never on the same page. When Levi wanted to move forward and take that next step Nico didn't want to. Now that Nico wants to move forward and take the next step Levi is no longer interested. What a dilemma. I also noticed that Jo and Levi had very similar outfits at the beginning of this episode. You know you’re becoming good friends with someone when you start unconsciously matching outfits.

Onto the next episode’s promo! We see Jackson driving in the rain, showing up on someone’s doorstep talking to himself about how his appearance might seem impulsive, but he has thought it through. The door opens to reveal April who is holding Harriet in between clips of his and April’s relationship. I have a few theories about this. First off, I think they are faking us out. If there was trouble in paradise and things weren’t going well with April and Matthew, they wouldn’t have had Jackson make a comment in the first half of the season about how Matthew is spending more time with Harriet then he and April are because they are taking more COVID shifts.

April is a deeply religious Christian woman whose faith is really important to her. She was vehemently opposed to getting a divorce even though her relationship with Jackson was clearly over because of her faith. Marriage is not something she takes lightly so I have a hard time seeing her divorce Matthew out of the blue because Jackson shows back up and is in crisis when her and Matthew have been together for the past three seasons and have been married for two.

Also, they are raising two children together and co-parenting one of those kids with Jackson. A lot of court services were shut down in the first few months of the pandemic for safety reasons which made it difficult to get a divorce and this episode takes place in June of 2020. So even if April and Matthew split up they couldn’t legally get a divorce very easily at this time and if April and Jackson got back together they would still have to interact with Matthew on a regular basis because they are co-parenting kids together and there’s no way that April would walk away from Ruby.

The only way I could see April and Jackson getting back together is if Matthew has died or fallen ill somehow. Otherwise I just don’t see it. I think they’re faking us out. I think the clips in the promo are there to entice japril fans and play into that because logistically I don’t see how a storyline in which April and Matthew suddenly divorce and April and Jackson get back together in one episode is possible.

Until next time!

[mca-attack21]

Shape Shifted - part 1

Hi guys! This is the next part of the Stiles Sis Fic series based loosely (and even that is generous) off of season two episode two. It can be read as a stand-alone. For the rest of this series and more of my writing, click here. I will be updating at least once a week until the series is finished. Enjoy!

Now that Lydia was home and safe, you allowed your thoughts to drift back to Isaac. You laid on your back and stared aimlessly at the ceiling, wondering what it was that he was about to do, or what he already did. You knew that for him not to be straight forward with you that it must’ve been something that he didn’t think you would approve of. And for him to even be considering it, things must’ve been getting worse for him at home again. 

Your heart pained to think how his father could… anyways. You wished that you could talk him into reporting it, but every time you brought it up he got so defensive. At some point, you decided that if he was going to go through it you would make sure that he didn’t have to go through it alone. Thinking over the past two months, you felt bad for not trying harder to be there for Isaac. No matter how hectic things had been with Scott and Stiles, it wasn’t an excuse. 

You pulled out your phone to text Isaac but were interrupted by a frantic knock at your window. 

Speak of the devil

You opened the window and ushered him inside, “Isaac what happened? Are you okay?”

“I-I think that my father’s dead,” he admitted as his breathing sped up. 

No amount of anything could have prepared you for those words out of his mouth under these circumstances.

“It’s okay Isaac, just breath, tell me what happened,” you said calmly as you led him over to your bed. It took a few minutes to calm down enough to collect his thoughts, but even then you could see the fear in his eyes.

“You won’t believe me,” he decides, pulling away from you and taking a step towards the window.

“Isaac, you know that there is nothing you could say that I wouldn’t believe. Now please, start from the beginning,” you invite him to sit beside you.

He reluctantly begins, “That night in the graveyard, after I was attacked, there was this man. He saved my life and then started talking about these crazy things. He knew about my dad, and told me that there was a way I could protect myself, a way to make sure that I could never be hurt again. And he explained that it wasn’t going to be easy, but that it would be worth it. I didn’t believe him, not at first, but then he showed me. He gave me a choice, and I accepted his offer,” Isaac explained.

“I’m confused, what was it that he gave you?” you asked.

“He - I -,” he paused for a moment trying to decide the best way to explain this to you, “okay, what I am about to tell you, it’s dangerous and you have to swear not to tell anyone,” Isaac looked up for confirmation but decided it wasn’t enough, “Y/n, I want to hear you say it, I want you to swear to me.”

“I swear, whatever you tell me will stay between us. But god Isaac, you’re starting to scare me.”

Instead of telling you with words, Isaac allowed his eyes to show yellow. He was surprised to see that you didn’t shrink back in fear or hate. Before he could explain further, you caught him off-guard, “You’re a werewolf.”

“How do you know about this?” he asked taken aback.

But you ignored him, “You are a werewolf, which makes the man you met Derek Hale, and if your dad is dead, the hunters are going to think you did it. And even if they don’t tomorrow is a full moon,” you realized.

Isaac stared at you in shock, out of all of the reactions he had played through in his mind, this most definitely was not one of them. 

“Isaac,” you said pulling him out of his thoughts, “what happened tonight?” 

“It started out how it always starts, my dad and I were eating dinner and then things escalated until he was throwing things at me. He threw this glass right above my head and it shattered leaving a shard in my cheek, just below my eye. I was just going to leave, but my dad saw me heal, so I ran. He followed me and I managed to ditch him, but then I heard his screams. I circled back, and I could smell his blood, too much blood. So I freaked and came here, I didn’t know what else to do,” he explained as his breathing became more frantic again.

“It’s okay Isaac. Everything is going to be okay, I promise. We just need to go see Derek, he’ll know how to handle this. Come on,” you said as you pulled him up and towards the door. You had him wait in the hall as you snuck into your brother’s room and stole the keys to Roscoe. 

As the two of you backed out of the driveway, Isaac asked, “How do you know about all of this? Werewolves, Derek, hunters? Did he offer you the bite too? Are you one of us?” 

“Not me, Scott. And it is a long and complicated story, but I promise that I will be here to help you through all of this. It might seem overwhelming now, but it’ll all work out, I promise.”

So, the two of you went to Derek’s loft and explained the situation. Derek ordered that Isaac act like normal and lay low until he could figure it out. But outside of that, his curiosity as to what had actually happened was trumping his need to protect Isaac. 

A little annoyed at the alpha, you took Isaac back out to the jeep and decided that you were both going to stay the night at your house. After sticking Stiles’ keys back in his room, you went back to Isaac.

“Okay, so let’s get this straight. Because the police are going to question you once they find your father, so it’s better to prepare now. Your dad and you got into a small argument and you left and rode your bike here. You’ve been here all night and tomorrow morning you will come down and eat breakfast with us so that my father can see that with his own eyes. If they ask about anything else, you don’t speak until you have a lawyer present. They can’t hold you unless there is a witness or you admit to doing something. So after they question you, you come back here and we will figure out how to get you through your first full moon.”

“Okay, I can do that,” he agreed, “How are you so good at this? You’re so calm, while I’m over here completely freaking out.” 

“This isn’t my first rodeo,” you joked. 

“I’m glad that you are here, I don’t even want to think about what I would do without you.”

“Well fortunately, you don’t have to worry about it. Now get some rest,” you said motioning for him to climb in your bed next to you.

The next morning went to plan. You paraded Isaac in front of your dad. Once you got to school, you stayed in Isaac’s general vicinity offering reassuring smiles every so often. When you weren’t with Isaac, you were with Lydia who was trying to adjust to her first day back after being naked in the woods for three days. She didn’t remember anything, which was probably a good thing, but that didn’t help the fact that everyone was staring at her like she was crazy. 

To say that you were relieved when the school day was over was an understatement. If you could get Isaac to stay with Derek past the full moon before the police brought him in for questioning it would definitely be ideal. Now, you just had to make it through practice.

Even as you had that thought though, everything started to go wrong.  First, Scott had been able to sense a werewolf and went through the team one by one until he discovered that it was Isaac. Though before any sort of confrontation could occur, the police showed up and took Isaac away for questioning.

You made your way out to Roscoe where Scott and Stiles were and Scott turned to you, “they took Isaac in for questioning, his dad was found brutally murdered earlier this morning.” After seeing your lack of reaction he added, “but it seems like you already knew that.”

“Did you also know that he was a werewolf?” Stiles spoke before you had a chance to say anything. 

“He is innocent. And possibly in danger, because in case you haven’t noticed tonight is a full moon. So maybe you should be thinking about what we are going to do if they decide to try to hold him overnight.” 

“He’s Derek’s problem,” Scott replied trying to hide the betrayal he was feeling.

“You don’t mean that,” you reply, trying to remember that the full moon was affecting your friend.

“Why not? Maybe this is what it takes for Derek to understand that he can’t just turn innocent teenagers to fuel his power trip” Scott tried to justify, raising his voice.

“Whatever Scott,” you dismissed before turning to Stiles, “take me to the station, I’ll figure this out myself.”

However your brother hesitated not wanting to pick between you and Scott. Having enough of both of them you rolled your eyes, “Fine, I’ll find my own ride,” you said before storming back towards the school. 

“Y/n-” Stiles called after you. 

“Let her go, we don’t need her,” Scott growled. 

“Hey, what is your problem?” Stiles asked defensively.

“If Y/n wants to choose Derek and Isaac over us then we don’t need her, do we?” 

“Careful Scott, you are starting to sound jealous,” Stiles said as he threw his bag in the back seat. 

“I just think it’s stupid that she is defending them and that she lied to us for god knows how long.”

Stiles decided to just keep his mouth shut as he drove the pair to Scott’s house. Meanwhile, you got a ride to the police station from Danny and were sitting in a chair outside his office. You noticed that there was an officer milling around that you had never noticed before which was saying something considering the fact that your dad was the Sheriff. 

You noticed that he ducked into one of the empty offices as your dad came out of the interrogation room, clearly surprised to see you. 

“What do you think you are doing here?” he asked as he let you into his office.

“I’m here for Isaac, how are things going?”

“To be honest with you kiddo, not good.”

“Why what happened?”

“We have a witness that the two of them were fighting last night and then his bike was found at the scene of the crime.”

“And if you looked at it, you would’ve noticed that it had a flat tire, which is why Isaac had to walk to our house,” you explained thankful that you had thought to have Derek take care of the tire earlier. 

“I know he’s your friend, did you have any idea that his father was abusing him?”

Your face fell, if your dad knew that, it meant that he either had a witness or was able to search Isaac’s house. 

“You should have told me,” your father sighed looking disappointed.

“He didn’t want me too,” you tried but you already knew it was hardly an excuse, “but if you know about that, then you should also know that one of the ways his dad punished him was by locking him in a freezer which causes him to become claustrophobic. And locking him in a holding cell would be traumatizing,” you tried to reason. 

“So then what would you propose?”

“Find a way to delay the process until tomorrow. Isaac can stay the night at our house so you can keep an on him, take him into your custody or something I don’t know. He just lost his dad, and while their relationship was … complicated, he was still his dad. This is the last thing he needs right now.”

“Y/n…”

“Please Dad, he’s my friend and he’s innocent.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” he concedes. 

“Can I see him?” you ask as your dad is exiting his office.

“He’s in the first interrogation room.”

“Thank you.”

You let out a breath that you didn’t know you had been holding, and turned the doorknob to enter the room where Isaac had been left alone. 

“How are you holding up?” you asked taking a seat across from him and tossing him a reese's from the vending machine.

“Better now that you are here. I heard you talking to your dad, do you really think that I’ll be able to walk out of here tonight?”

“I hope so, but don’t worry if not I have a back-up plan. Just try to stay calm, I know you are going through a lot today.”

“I can’t believe everything could go wrong so fast, I never wanted this. I just didn’t want to be afraid anymore.”

“You don’t deserve this, and I’m sorry that you are here right now. But I promise you that we will figure this out.” 

“I hope so.”

“Let’s try to get your mind on something else,” you said before engaging him in conversation until there was a soft knock on the door and your dad came in. 

“Well, Isaac, if you agree to staying in my custody, we are going to let you go for the night. We might need you to come back in tomorrow and answer a few more questions,” your dad explained. 

“Thank you so much Sheriff Stilinski,” Isaac said graciously.

“Don’t thank me, thank Y/n she’s practically your lawyer,” you dad joked, before adding “I have to finish up some paperwork, but then we can all go back to the house.”

“Sounds good, in the meantime can we wait in your office?” you asked wanting to get Isaac into a different environment.

“That’s fine.”

As soon as you and Isaac were alone in his office, you pulled out your phone and text Derek to update him on the entire situation. You then turned to Isaac, “How are you feeling?” you said referring to the full moon. 

“I got it under control for the time being, I think that it’ll be better once we get out of here though.”

“I don’t know if Derek told you, but your first one is always the hardest. You have to find something or someone that keeps you human. An anchor. Otherwise you’ll lose control. Stiles has chains and stuff that he used for Scott, and I’ll be there every step of the way. If it starts to get bad, I’ll call Derek.”

“I’m glad one of us has a plan,” Isaac said before resting his head in his hands feeling exhausted with everything that had happened.

You took a seat next to him and pulled him in your arms, not saying a word. It was about fifteen minutes later when your dad came in and escorted the two of you out to his car. When you arrived home he mentioned something about ordering pizza, you agreed and then rushed Isaac, who you could tell was beginning to struggle, upstairs. You got the stuff you needed out of Stiles’ room and noticed headlights across the street. Hunters. 

Realizing how much harder this would make things, you called Derek and told him to stay away. This could actually be a good thing, as long as you could keep Isaac under control, then maybe they wouldn’t suspect him of being a werewolf. That was definitely going to be easier said than done. Especially when you were alone and having to hide everything from your dad. 

You re-entered your room and set up the chains, hoping that by some miracle you wouldn’t need them. Your dad brought up the pizza and you accepted it gratefully before quickly closing the door behind you. This was going to be a long night.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

That... was pretty mediocre for an anniversary episode? Although 35th anniversaries aren’t usually very big anyway, so. I suppose that’s justified. It was better than last week’s ep (to be fair, that’s a VERY low bar, it would’ve been pretty much impossible for it to be worse than last week), but the show is still on shaky ground for me. I honestly don’t know if I’ll keep watching past this point. If I do keep watching, it’ll just be for Jade, ‘cause she’s brilliant.

Anyway.

I only tuned in tonight to see Noel one last time, and in that respect, I’m pretty satisfied. I know a lot of people were saying the same about Cal, but I’m not particularly familiar with Cal, I started watching a few months after his death and haven’t seen that many older episodes with him. It was nice to see him again, though. But my focus really was on Noel.

He actually got more screentime than I expected, and it was lovely, if also painful, to be reminded of what a great character he was. To see his compassion, the way he went above and beyond for the patients and relatives in the ED, even though he was only the receptionist. To see him laughing with Big Mac, showing off his friendliness and sense of humour.

And then there was the “grandpa Noel” line. OW. Casualty got me right through the heart with that one.

I miss Noel so much. But I’m glad his final scenes got to be here, rather than in the COVID episode, which pretended to be about him but was actually just about Connie and her feelings. (I love Connie. You know I do. But it did Noel a disservice, focusing his death episode on how Connie felt about it.) And he’ll forever live on in my heart. Noel, my beloved. <3

Indeed, the flashback scenes in general were probably the best part of the ep. They did a very good job making it really feel like 2016 Casualty - to the point my mom, while watching the episode with me, commented “This is just making me think ‘Oh, it was so much better in the old days!’. I don’t think that’s what they’re going for.” For once, my mom is right and she should say it, lol.

I particularly loved how Jade was tied into the flashback. I wasn’t expecting that at all, and I was very pleasantly surprised. If you all haven’t figured it out yet, I really love Jade. She’s one of the very best characters Casualty has at the moment, and she has to be one of my personal favourite fictional characters ever. The more screentime and storylines she gets, the more I enjoy an episode.

Poor, poor Ethan, eh? His life just really, really sucks. His brother was brutally murdered. He has a terminal illness that will eventually rob him of his ability to be a doctor. He’s lost both his biological and adoptive mothers. Now he’s lost the woman he loved, on the day they were supposed to get married. Now he’s been left as a single parent, knowing that, even in the most optimistic scenario, even if his condition can be managed for a long time, he’s still not going to live long enough to see his son become an adult and start a career and have kids. God, that poor man. No wonder he’s having a breakdown.

And now Stevie is about to cause more trouble for him. I like Stevie so far, and find her an interesting character. I am curious about how the storyline with her sister is going to play out. But oof, her arrival sucks for Ethan, given she blames him for what’s happened to Emma. And she’s definitely a very flawed character. (And please, fandom, stop hating on her this soon and let her be flawed. You’re allowed to dislike her, but you can’t deny she’d be getting a lot more interest and sympathy if she were a male character behaving in exactly the same ways. There are plenty of male characters on this show who aren’t very good people but we love them anyway.)

Anyway, speaking of Stevie, we’re all agreed that she’s definitely not straight or neurotypical, right? She just gives off strong sapphic vibes, she’s probably bi. And she hasn’t been around long enough and doesn’t have a defined enough personality yet for me to figure out quite what I think is going on in her brain, but she’s definitely some kind of neurodivergent. My first thought, being me, was autism - I’ve seen other people suggest ADHD or bipolar. I guess we’ll have to see how her character develops, in order to see what fits best.

And Stevie is also polyamorous!!! That one’s canon!!! Okay, the line about her going out with 3 different guys with the same name at once could mean she was cheating on all of them. But I’m taking it to mean she’s polyamorous! And no one can stop me! :D

Uhhh, what else is there to talk about... oh yeah, I like Theodore so far (even if he - and the other paramedic from the trailer - does look about 12, lol), I literally don’t care about Charlie or Robyn or Paul, we got some good Dylan content tonight, and last but not least I have no sympathy for Faith. Sorry not sorry, she treated Lev like shit. I don’t care about how she feels now that he’s dead.

[silence-burns]

Please Hate Me //part 34

Fandom: Marvel

Summary: Based on: “Imagine having a love/hate relationship with Loki.” by @thefandomimagine​ Who would have thought that babysitting a god could be so much fun?

Genre: slow-burn, enemies to lovers

Your hand felt warm and soft in his, and just the right size for holding on the way back to the Tower. The day turned to evening, and the evening into an early night before you even realised. Street lamps were already fighting off the crisp darkness as Loki and you strode through the thin layer of fresh snow. 

It had been an interesting day. Loki looked at the small figurine, bearing some unmistakable similarities to the way he had looked back during the New York invasion. Finding it on the shelves of a shop you took him to was a strange feeling. There were so many different ones, both of him and the Avengers, and even people he could only guess were some other heroes or important figures on Earth. It was clear from looking at them that whoever had created them, paid great attention to details and colors.

The face underneath his favourite golden helmet looked slightly off, if Loki had to be painfully honest, but it wasn't completely wrong either. The wrinkles of the cape, and the leathery fabric of his armor were like their real counterparts. He could almost feel it on him as he looked at the tiny version of himself you insisted on purchasing. 

Loki wasn't sure why it had been put on the same shelf as the Avengers, and your explanation wasn't very helpful. He didn't feel angry, though, just a little confused. 

It felt fragile in his palm, so he made sure to handle it with care. For reasons unknown to him, you insisted that you wanted to put it in your room, preferably by the window so that it could be as close to snow as possible. Loki didn't follow your line of argument, but the care you talked about it with warmed his heart. 

Loki was still holding it when you walked into the elevator, and was smiling softly as the automatic doors opened to let you enter the common area of the floor. 

More precisely, the sitting area that was currently in use. 

"This is awkward," you said as the two of you stopped in front of the Avengers, in an atmosphere so heavy and tense that it could be cut with a knife. 

For some reason, Peter was there too, sat in the back, between a stone-faced Steve and Natasha whose mood was, as usual, unreadable. 

Thor, with his back to you, stared or pretended to stare through the window. He had his cape off, and you could see Mjolnir put down nearby. Banner was standing next to it, completely lost in nervous cleaning of his glasses with the hem of his shirt. 

"It's almost as if they have been waiting for us, like a puppy left at home for too long," Loki said lightly, but the joke didn't reach his eyes. They scanned the brightly lit room with a trained intensity. 

The hand still holding yours tightened. 

"Where have you been?" Steve asked flatly. 

"Out." 

"Why?" 

You shrugged. "We kinda prefer a company of people who know how to have fun. What have you been doing here all this time? Having a stare off? Discussing the bills?" 

You could've sworn there was a shadow of a smile on Natasha's face, but it disappeared as quickly as it happened. Peter, on the other hand, was sitting very, very still with his back uncomfortably straight, looking around with wide eyes. It was clear he had absolutely no idea what was going on. Most likely, he just wanted to come by the Tower to talk everyone's ears off about how his totally-not-a-date went. It looked like he was unlucky enough to get involved in whatever was going on. 

"This is really not the right time for jokes.” Tony massaged his temples, as if whatever headache he had could be worked off by regular circles. 

"And that's why it's always so serious in here-" 

Tony huffed and fished something out of the pockets of his suit. He almost pushed it into your hands before you could even protest. Loki watched him with an ice-cold glare and you could've sworn the temperature in the room dropped by a few degrees. 

"The hell is this?" you frowned, unpacking a few photos of various shapes and sizes. Loki peered over your shoulder. 

And smiled. 

Tony felt his blood boil. "May I ask when precisely did you plan to inform us of your little 'engagement'...?" 

The photos were all from different places, but they had two things in common. One was you. The other was Loki. The enchantment put on him prevented strangers from recognizing his features, but it did nothing against people who had already been acquainted with him - like the Avengers. 

An uncontrollable wave of laughter erupted out of you as you looked at all the stupid, love-sick poses that had granted you so much free cake all those weeks ago. So much had happened since then, both in general and in between the two of you, it was actually hilarious that something like that had finally resurfaced. 

Tony was far from sharing your mood. "I have no idea what is so funny, but I was far from laughing when Happy noticed those in my favourite bakery while getting doughnuts. And he was even less happy than usual to find similar atrocities committed in other places-" 

That was too much for you. You bent in half, shaking and flushed. Loki didn't seem to mind. If anything, he looked strangely satisfied while looking through the photos. 

Steve cleared his throat. "When did you-" 

"I KNEW IT!" 

Everyone started when Peter finally broke. Before anyone managed to stop him, Peter leaped off the couch and closed Loki and you in a bone crushing hug. "I love you guys so much and I'm so happy for you." 

Clint, who had been completely silent up to that point, and to be honest also more than a little confused, asked "Wait, so you knew about them this whole time? Why is no one telling me shit? Why am I always the last one to know?" 

Natasha patted his knee and silenced him. She was having way more fun than she had originally anticipated. The colors changing on Tony's face in a rapid succession were truly a work of art. 

Peter stared at Loki with pure, unfiltered adoration in his eyes that even your breathless choking couldn't break. "I didn't know about the engagement, but it all makes so much sense now. Please, Mr. Mischief, can I be a flower boy at your wedding? I've always wanted to, but Aunt May never allowed me, but I promise I'll be the best flower boy ever, I swear it!" 

The colors on Tony's face stopped changing. He walked over to the cabinet and took hold of the whisky bottle. 

Steve looked as if he needed that kind of support too, but tried his best to hold it together. Thor, to Loki's great surprise and even greater suspicion, still stood in front of the window. The only sign that he was indeed listening to the mess unraveling in the brightly lit living room were the whitened knuckles of his hands. 

Peter misunderstood Loki's silence for a no. The boy dropped to his knees and hugged Loki's leg tightly. "Please, Mr. Loki! Don't leave me out of this, I've been supporting you from the very beginning! I have every comic book made about you and every figurine available on eBay and I even wrote an essay about the Nordic pantheon last year!" 

The tears in the boy's eyes were what had utterly destroyed you. Completely breathless from laughing that you just couldn't hold back, you dropped to the floor next to the boy. Tears were streaming down your cheeks, and you gasped for air that just couldn't get to your lungs. Your stomach was a painful mess and no matter how much you wanted, you just couldn't stand straight. 

The whole situation was so ridiculous and unexpected, that every time you tried to get a hold of yourself in order to explain that mess, you started laughing all over again. 

That was precisely the moment when Thor finally moved. He walked in a slow, menacing manner that had always raised tension in the room. The look in his eyes was one that Loki came to know all too well throughout the centuries they'd spent together. 

"Why are you always like this, Loki?" 

Loki looked at the boy on the verge of tears glued to his right leg. Then he looked at you on his left, fallen to your knees laughing. He was surrounded by idiots. 

And loved them. 

Loki smiled. "What can I say, brother? I have always been the charming one." 

Tony sipped his whiskey straight from the bottle. Initially, he reached out for the glass, but decided otherwise as the conversation progressed. 

"Did you destroy the building on the Fifth Avenue with your charms too?" was all he asked. 

You leaned your head on Loki's leg, finally mastering yourself a little bit. "That's not fair, Tony. We wreak ONE building, entirely on accident, and you won't overlook it, but whenever you guys fight in a city, so much public and private property gets destroyed that the lawsuits-" 

"That is not the point-" 

"But it's still true!" 

Natasha wished she had taken popcorn with her. Clint turned his hearing aid off and leaned his head on the back of the couch next to her. 

Thor sighed. 

"Asgard needs you, brother." 

The room fell silent with the weight held in those words. Thor crossed his arms. Loki understood now that what he had initially taken for anger, was in fact weariness he could sense in Thor. Weariness and sadness. 

"What happened?" 

You stood up and took his hand. It was cold and tense, but he still requited your touch. His fingers clasped yours tightly. 

Thor looked down at your intertwined hands, and at the boy still clutching Loki's leg. 

"I'm glad you have found yourself a place here, brother, I really am, despite what you're probably thinking," he said. "But we need your assistance. Asgard's ambassador to the Realms of The Edge was brutally murdered two days ago, along with a noble born of the Edge. We're on the brink of war. The Edge requested investigation by one of us." 

That was… quite a lot to process. 

Loki looked at you. You looked at Loki. Peter tried his best to blend in with Loki's trousers and not be kicked out of the conversation. 

You frowned at Thor. "But if it happened two days ago, what are you still doing here? Aren't you needed where it happened?" 

Thor shifted uneasily. For the first time since they started talking, he looked uncomfortable and couldn't hold your gaze. 

"I can't go there." 

You waited for further explanation, but none came. Loki, on the other hand, didn't look surprised. 

"My dearest brother was banned from the Edge a long time ago," he explained happily. "After a certain unfortunate incident, the lords of the Edge decided that he is no longer welcome there." 

"Don't speak as if you weren't a part of the very same unfortunate incident, Loki." 

"But I wasn't caught." 

"And that's why you're going. Asgard doesn't have any other Princes to spare, however unlucky that is, and the lords still don't trust our father." 

Loki opened his mouth to protest. 

"Mother's already agreed," Thor added. 

"Oh." Loki closed his mouth. 

"Who's going to go with him then, if you can't?" you asked, concern written over your features. 

"No one else from Asgard is allowed there. It took our father three thousand years to convince the lords of the Edge to agree to at least one ambassador. Our peoples have… a difficult history." 

"Which basically means Asgard waged a bloody, unfair war against the Edge and destroyed half of their lands before it finally realized there was nothing of value on them," Loki explained. "It's only natural that the Edge wants as little to do with Asgardians as possible."

"Wait."

All eyes landed on you. 

"So you're saying that you have to go there alone, without any help or assistance, to solve a murder and stop a war of vengeance completely on your own, among people who are already hostile and will probably try to finish what was started? Am I seeing things right or is this an actual joke, as lame and poor as I'd expect out of you, Thor?"

Thor, for his part, looked embarrassed. "It's not like we have any choice."

"Right, you don't," you nodded. "I'm going too." 

The voices of protest were louder than you expected, but not as loud as the one voice that absolutely loved your idea. 

Peter clutched Loki's leg even harder. "I want to go to space too! PLEASE!" 

Tony put the bottle down. "Peter, you're fifteen and have homework. Wasn't that your own argument when I-" 

"I also have hopes and dreams!" 

"No. Your aunt would gut me and make herself and Pepper a bag out of my skin." 

"It's going to be dangerous there. Next time, kid," Loki patted his head with surprising gentleness. He had grown attached to the boy, even before the boy had attached himself to Loki with the power of love, adoration, and his spidery stickiness. 

Peter looked around the room. However confused, its inhabitants weren't protesting your candidature. "But if it's so dangerous, why are only the two of you going?" 

"Because he's literally a god," you said and Loki nodded. "And I'm an asshole that's very hard to kill. Like a cockroach." Loki nodded again. 

Peter was sad to realise the odds, but he didn't protest any further. He moved back onto his feet again and hugged Loki and you one last time. 

"Just stay safe out there, okay? And if you ever need a Spider-Man, you know where to find me. Alone. Again." 

"We're gonna be back before you notice," you ruffled his hair. 

There was silence between Loki and you as you headed towards the room you’d  been residing in for the few past weeks. It was not an uncomfortable silence, and certainly not one held in anger. It was a silence that always accompanied moments of unexpected change. 

Loki beheld the room. He looked at his clothes laid on the floor and a chair. At one of his daggers left on the bedside table. 

"Are you sure about going with me?" he asked. 

You sat on the bed. "I've already told you that. I won't let you go there alone. From the sound of it, it's going to be dangerous." 

"I don't want you to risk your life." 

"And I want to protect yours," you shrugged. "I guess we're gonna have to work around that." 

Loki smiled. "Thank you." 

He found his enchanted bag pushed deep under the bed. There were a lot of things Loki had to pack, and was very grateful for the capacity of his own personal space pocket. He'd enchanted the bag back when he was just a kid, with a little help from his mother, and made sure to take it with him wherever he could. It was worn from frequent use, but still held strong. 

Loki brushed the cracked leather. You put your own belongings next to him to pack. 

Loki was still kneeling when he looked up at you, perched on the edge of the bed you'd shared for so long. His mouth went dry when he saw the casual confidence you held around him. All those weeks you'd had together, all those incidents and adventures, and all those faked proposals just for the sake of free cake… 

There was something he just had to ask, had to know and hear, even when he had been hoping for it for a while now. 

Hope. That's all he'd been reduced to. 

There used to be days when he'd sneer on that thought. This was not one of them. Today it felt right. 

"Would you…?" 

You smiled at the god fallen to his knees, even as the air seemed to leave the room and tighten his throat. 

"In this world and all the others, Loki." 

He let his lips fall onto yours, gently and with care. Weeks ago, Loki might’ve said it was almost an accidental touch, just a brush really, a surprise for both parties. But things changed and so did he. 

"I love you on purpose," he said, with hands cupping the face he could stare at for the rest of eternity. "And with the intent of loving you more with each day." 

Silver lined your eyes, and a choked chuckle escaped you. "What's there not to love? I'm a delight." 

Loki grinned. "Of course you are, darling." 

 *

A/N: This story finally hit 50k words and I'm so proud of myself! This is the longest fic I've ever worked on. 50k words and the first kiss... Does this still count as a slow-burn?? I'm sorry if the portrayal of some of the Avengers might feel off, I just needed someone to do the scolding part :P Please be merciful on me! I hope you enjoyed this chapter anyway, please tell me what do you think of the direction this story is taking!

[horrorslashergirl]

The Lurking One: A Shadow Horror Story

Authors Note: Decided to write a story for my newest Slasher OC, Shadow. People seem to really like him, despite him not having a face claim. lol

Warning: 18+ for horror, gore and torture, plus add in trauma

Words: 2.4k words

It was one of these late at night study sessions for the ones that slacked during the year and had to catch up with what they lost; Giula was one of them and she cursed herself for letting her time be filled with sorority activities and parties.

The Northeastern University campus was empty save for the security guard; Guila being the only student who was currently in the library catching up to a project that was due to tomorrow. She could have done it back at the sorority house, but she knew the girls would distract her and tempt her with other activities such as preparing for a college festival that was in two weeks.

Her grades were more important than social activities that would print into her status, not to mention her parents who had a talk with her about the fact that college wasn't a gateway for drinking and hooking up with guys.

Guila sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose, checking the old antique clock of the library.

10:35 PM

Her gaze moved back to the tons of files and books on the wood desk she was sat at. She just finished the project, but she needed to revise it to make sure everything was perfectly done. The grade for this project was important and she wasn't looking for another discussion with her parents and the headmaster.

She will look it over in the morning; she needed to be fresh tomorrow for the presentation and looking like a crackhead in front of the judges wasn't a pro in the book. Putting everything back into her bag neatly, she pulled her hair out of the tight ponytail, letting her auburn locks fall freely down her back, almost to the hips.

Walking out of the library and locking the door; thank God the old library lady was a sweetheart and left the keys for her to close. She walked down the hallways and taking the old victorian ascensor to the low floor. Before she could exit the building she stopped by the cubicle of the security guard, handing him the keys.

"All done for tonight, dear?" Arthur asked, taking the keys and setting them on his desk.

"Well, finally so. I will have to own Mrs. Hariot for leading me the keys to the library." Giula told the old man with a smile.

"Ahhh...She's an angel among here. Trust me, it was her pleasure." he old the girl, sitting back down at his desk, a copy of  Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen was on the desk.

"Have a good night without incidents, Sir." Giula told the gentleman guard who nodded.

"Nothing ever happens around here. Kids nowadays don't read books anymore, so I don't think someone will try to break into the library." Arthur joked, making Giulia giggle and nod, although feeling a little by what he said.

"I suppose so. Good night." the girl waved off, stalking towards the exit.

"Likewise, dear!" Arthur called after her, going back to the classic novel.

As she opened the door, a chilly air hit Giulia in the face, making her wrap her arms around herself. It was definitely colder than when she got in the morning here. It was earlier spring, the days warm, but the nights reminding that the winter just recently moved away.

She was wearing a white button-down with dark blue jeans and some ballet flats that made her legs all shaky; her light brown cardigan not helping at all. She couldn't wait to get back to the sorority house and bask in the warmness of her bed and away from the coldness of the night.

It was just a 20 minutes long time walk to the house, but it seemed like much more to her now that she was all alone and shivering like a hairless cat.

Mentally, she cursed her parents for not letting her drive, always scolding her that she wasn't ready. Overly protective parents and their old school mentality always made Giulia feel like she was still a baby. She was 22 and in the second year of college for Christ's sake.

She couldn't wait to finish college and get a job; Oh the dream of having her own apartment and not having to deal with doll-like girls who owned Porches all because of their wealthy daddies. Now thinking more about it, she was the only one who didn't have an overly rich family; maybe the girls kept her because she was the only one who was first to clean a mess, make breakfast when the others were hungover.

The streets were all deserted, none was outside, most people here being locals since birth or college students who basked in cheap beer and gossips at this hour.

This neighbor that gave off hostel-like vibes made her skin be covered in goosebumps, smelling a faint scent of weed, beer and hearing the music blasting from the apartments above. The police wouldn't come to stop the noise, since there was none to be bothered by the hypnotic beat.

Guila could feel eyes on her, but every time she turned around to take a look there was none, just the slight wet streets and alleyways that adored this place. Each time she passed one, she would halt her walking, afraid two big clawed hands will brisk her away into darkness.

She rolled her eyes as a guy from above cat-called her, probably drunk off his ass, and his girlfriend a few feet away from him at the window making out with his best friend.

Boston really was filled up with these types of students, getting great opportunities and throwing said blessing out the window because of blinding hormones, and the idea of being young means I'm indestructible.

'Just 10 more minutes and you will be home.' Giulia thought to herself, but it quickly went off the window as pain shot through her scalp, before she knew it she was dragged into the darkness of an alleyway.

One strong arm wrapped around the middle section of her waist, but the other moved to her neck, feeling the prickle of something cold against her neck; a blade, a knife, something that was indeed sharp.

"Scream and you can say arrivederci to your precious vocal cords." the person that held her spoke, voice raspy and very eerie, definitely a male.

"P-Please...Don't kill me." Giulia whispered, afraid that if she raises her voice too much, he won't keep on his promises.

"Shush now. I heard that line all too many times and it gets very monotonous." the man spoke right by her ear, running what she assumed was a scalpel over her cut, not slitting her throat, but surely making a small cut to show that he wasn't playing games.

She was panicking, her breathing getting more on the hysterical edge, then she did the first thing she could think of. She kicked him in one of his shins, making him groan, but he didn't back off. He did throw her in the opposite direction of the alleyway against the brick wall. Giulia grunted and whimpered as she hit the ground right into a puddle.

Her hazel eyes looked up and she felt terror strick her as he stalked over to her wet and bruised form, like a panther ready to pounce on its prey. She could scream, but the music from the apartments above was so loud she wouldn't have a chance in someone hearing her.

One cold leather-gloved hand wrapped around her neck and he slammed her back into the wall, showing so much strength that got her the image of him snapping her tiny neck like a twig.

"That was some dirty move you put up there, little wench. Although I am a very patient man." he whispered, and now that he was in front of her, she could make out what he looked like.

He was wearing all black, probably a very expensive tailored suit with a scarlet red tie, not even a glimpse of skin was shown. What really caught her attention was his vintage-looking fedora and the creepy raven like a mask. 

A doctor purge mask? She heard of them from her brother who was very into history.

"W-Who are you?" Giulia choked, his hand tightening around her throat at the question.

He hummed like he was deep in thought.

"I think the public eye has birthed me as the Shadow." he answered her question.

It took only a few seconds for Giulias eyes to widen and her body to tremble. She heard on the news about him; the unknown brutal killer, never seen, none to survive to tell the story and how they described his murderers on television.

The killer known now as Shadow chuckled at her horrified face.

"Ahhhh....So you heard of me. Good. I hate to explain information to someone who cannot even work their brain enough to avoid someone dangerous." he mused, making the young woman whimper and cry, then she began to swing her legs in an attempt to hurt him.

Only for her head to be slammed multiple times against the brick wall until her vision blacked and she fell on the dirty ground by the pristine black Oxfords he was sporting.

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The lightbulb above flickered to life and Giulia opened her eyes, looking around like a desperate animal caged, or more like chained by her neck, a metal collar digging into the skin of her neck and creating red and purple marks.

Her doe-like eyes looking around and stopped on the black-clad figure.

The Shadow.

"Ahh...I'm glad you're awake. I might think I hit your head too many times on the brick wall. I usually prefer drugging my victims, but you were acting like too much of a mindless animal." he began to spoke so fluently, calm, like everything that was going on was a normal occurrence for him; like discussing the weather over a few drinks.

The man was laying some tools neatly on a metal table; surgical tools, like scalpels, forceps, scissors, retractors, and clamps. Giulia felt a bile form in her throat, starting to tug on the heavy chain that was bounded against the concrete wall; no luck.

"Let m go, you fucker!" she screamed and in an instant, her back meet the cold wall, gloved hand grasping her jaw tightly as the leather beak of the mask brushed against her face.

"You smell putrid, although there is that faint strawberry scent of your perfume." he commented, fingertips digging more into her jaw and making her whimper and sob.

In his free hand, he held a pair of surgical retractors and her eyes widened when he forced her mouth open, one finger pulling her upper lip to expose her pearly white teeth and pink gums.

"You have a nice set of teeth there. I adore your canines especially." he whispered, then he grasped one of her canines with the retractor, tugging on it and forcing a pain-filled scream from Giulia; the next twin teeth following. 

Her tears filled eyes looking as he held both canines between black covered fingers.

"Very impeccable indeed." he murmured, going back to the table.

The metallic taste of blood and sterisol filled her mouth, scarlet dripping down her chin.

She knew this was far from over as his thumb run over the shiny scalpel.

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Giulia didn't know how much time has flown; one month, maybe two? She hadn't seen the light of the day in so long and she wished dead would overcome her.

She was in so much pain; the things Shadow did to her. First the canines, then her fingernails went off and when she spat on his mask she thought she was going to die as he poured acidic fluid down her scalp; her beautiful long hair was just a burned memory.

Dead was supposed to come, but the sadist treated her wounds like an expert at the hospital, only to remind her that death was far away from her.

Then the begging, telling him what she will do anything, even getting on her knees and possibly giving him new ideas. His words were absolute humiliation.

"I know what you're implying, ignorant wench." he told her as his gloved hands were running down her naked hips, then he left her.

"I'm not a rapist, darling. Never found any fascination with taking someone against their own will in that way. I prefer my slave to be willing, but you're not. So I advise next time you keep these sick fantasies to yourself." he told her, mocking and making her feel even more stupid.

She caught glimpses of him doing awful things to the other girls; one of them skinned alive and every muscle on full display.

"You're just too perfect, aren't you?" he told Giulia, making her a confused mess.

---------------------------------------------

She did manage to trick him when he was busy piercing her earlobes multiple types, having to bite her tongue as she stole the keys to her chains.

Then when he found her moving down the hallways; she almost got her leg blown off when he used a shotgun after her. She had opened the door to the exit and was meet with the night. Running through the forest, looking behind her over and over.

Her luck was finally getting to the principal road and a car passed by, getting in, and again she was in danger. The old man tried to rape her, but she was brave enough to jump out of the car when they were in town.

After 30 minutes of limping around the streets, she finally spotted a police car that was patrolling.

Interrogations followed, but she always spoke the same words, too traumatized by the events.

'He is tall and in all black. He doesn't seem human. No human could do this. He pulled all her skin off like she was a rabbit. His voice, makes me wanna throw up, it's so raspy it makes me wanna be deaf so I cannot hear it anymore in my head. What he did to the other girls...I cannot describe. He said that I'm perfect. What was that supposed to mean?'

Her parents were devasted when they found out about everything that happened and her mother fell on her knees crying over and over when she finally saw Giulia face to face.

The worst was that she could no longer be let on her own; nightmares, voices, aggressive outbursts, and feeling like she was constantly followed. She was scared of her own shadow.

When the police found the whereabouts of where Giulia was held everything was gone, not even a spot of blood like there was none there in the first place.

Why clean it all up if Shadow wanted the bodies to be found in the first place?

Needless to say...Nights in Boston weren't safe anymore.

[stray-tori]

TPN S02E08 - Initial Thoughts (anime-only)

Reaction Vid: Google Drive

I’m here, finally! Let me just say, I’m glad to see some more positivity around ahh- Not that anyone isn’t allowed to feel negatively about it, I do have my problems too of course! But it’s just nice when things are epic and liked by people :)

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I don’t think I can really separate it into topics this time so I’ll just kind of... go through it by chronological order this time! With “.” paragraphs separating thoughts :)

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Norman figuring out that there’s at least one other person taking tests because he’s left-handed and the code scan thing is placed on the right when he put it down left is such a nice, unspoken execution!

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also. Zaziee :(

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also, what do we think is happening in this room? are those just... dead subjects that they feed to demons or...? experimenting with how certain manipulated humans will affect demons eating them? 

(also they just flipped Norman’s walk here, so his curl is on the wrong side. not blaming them or anything, I just noticed. I hope the staff is doing okay :<)

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also, idk if my brain is melting but when Norman was like "I just need a detonator" and then he focuses on that king chess piece before the explosion, is the implication that the king piece was the detonator? :D

I do like the few subtle hints we do get just from the scenes (like the left hand/right hand thing and the cube communication) but I feel like I'm missing some connecting pieces here, even with knowing Smee was there and supporting him. It’s weird because I feel like the left-hand thing was really nicely done and digestible and the fork thing is presumably checking out how many cameras there are (even if still a little obvious) - but the explosion? Maybe I’m just stupid haha- it had to be Smee helping, right? I just would have liked more hints (but maybe I’m too small brain rn).

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I'm a little confused because Peter said "the era of James as the gatekeeper has ended" (paraphrased), so he’s the gatekeeper right? And Norman was so concerned about the gatekeeper last episode, to the point that I felt like it was a point largely against the "using the gate in GF" plan (aside from uncertainty about the gates and the human world, of course) - but it's literally just a human then? I thought it was gonna be some epic demon or magic concept or something, but it's just that dude pff- whats the dude gonna do against the murder squad? :D Ig he has the farm/demon forces behind him but those would exist either way (and Norman must have considered that), so why is he in particular such a big deal/threat? Is he that ultra big brain? Not big brain enough to have prevented Norman’s escape anyway.

Or maybe he’s just 6 moves ahead and waiting for Norman to lead him back to the hideout that was referenced a few episodes ago where Norman brings all the stolen kids -- but I feel like that’s such a... roundabout way of capturing the GF kids. Plus, that should be Isabella’s doing, if anything. So yeah. Confused about that a bit.

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I love the parallel how in ep1 Ray running from the pursuers and Emma collapsing was the whole thing about like, not taking it all upon yourself -- and now Emma (who mirrored Ray’s exact run through the forest) got help with Ray jumping in and also later Sonju, conveniently timed as usual haha.

(negativity) It’s a nice parallel, though i would have preferred if Ray had run again and Emma had gotten the shot - it’d still carry around the same message (”then vs now”) but please I beg you give Emma one (1) cool bow shot  - or I’ll steal your animation and do it myself >:”(

(ik she got the hunting shot which was slow and cool but idk)

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The animation was so pretty. I loved Norman on the cliff and the wind animation, and the MUSIC when the town raid happened and how everything was framed and the goddamn MUSIC???? DID I MENTION THE MUSIC.

Also Norman’s expression and that shot where he realizes Vyrk has the blood condition and sweeps in for a stab.

It was pretty brutal and I appreciate that they showed it. It’s just... really pretty overall and- yes. thank you. love goes out to the staff. god knows they need some. and money. please give them more money.

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I also like how with how the episode set up the whole, "are you god?" - "I'll be a god or devil" thing, and then when Vyrk asks "are you a human?", my friend joked he'd answer "no, i'm god" and then we joked a bit about his silence. But in hindsight, I really appreciate those jokes, because it made me realize: for a different kind of character, that WOULD have been the perfect setup to have a badass response but that silence was probably on purpose and I can’t really explain it but I just like how that makes the through-line in the episode even stronger and also kind of connects with his wavering?? I can’t explain but I LIKE IT.

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(slightly negative) It's a little bit funny that the parallel didn't occur to him until it was thrown in his face, but I think that's what dissociation and just being observed in one's plan does.

Plus I do get what they're going for, and it was pretty dang emotional. A little on the nose maybe but- yee.

It works well as an eye opener to tear down the mental wall between the two groups. He's also never really been in contact with demons equally before afaik so, I shall accept it. Not that currently killing them all makes him equal in power dynamic right now, but I mean like, in a way where he truly, in real life, got to see that they’re similar -- he made comparisons to humans last episode, so clearly he wasn’t completely unaware. He’s smart, he knew what he was doing would make him seem like a devil to the demons. He probably just numbed himself to it until something that could break those walls down happened, ie the Emma thing.

I feel like it could have worked too if her name wasn’t Emma, but he probably wouldn’t have paused for as long and the voiced lines couldn’t have been given the time needed to make them hit as strongly - but I do think just a line that sounds really similar to what they talked about in GF could have been enough too - but again, that would have potentially taken too long down the exchange between the two.

It also doesn’t seem completely random since the old guy also reacted to Emma’s name before and everything so. Overall, I’m willing to suspend my disbelief - even if it IS funny that the family naming went from Vyrk to... Emma :D (though demons do get old so I suppose that makes sense haha)

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I also wonder how this will impact Norman going forward. Even if he decides for the GF plan now (likely, we don’t have much time), he still did that and even if they return all the degenerated demons with Mujika’s, Sonju’s and Vyrk’s help... I doubt those who were already eaten and killed, can be saved. So that blood is on his hands forever now, likely hurting even more now that he feels personally impacted by it and not just... knows he’s doing something bad.

The anime definitely doesn’t have the time to delve into that sadly but that’s,,, very good angst.

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week 3 of asking where is Isabella- (I mean I am GLAD that she didn’t show up at the temple- yET - because that’d just make them leaving them there worse but fudshjsd- Is she actually just waiting for them to come for the gate what’s happening ahahaha-)

I also don’t know if I mentioned this in my last episode thoughts or not, but I do still believe the gate stuff could have been revealed more incrementally? Like have James include that tidbit of info, please. If we know gates exist, then at least now it isn’t such an extreme change of information to know: “there are gates. yes where you were sent WAS a gate, but they’ve been destroyed. oh and another gate is in GF!” like HOLD UP-

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I wonder if we’ll ever see the hideout that Cislo or Vincent referenced... I’m sure that’d be lots of random children designs so probably not but,, I am really curious how and if they’ll take all those kids. Norman did say he wants freedom for all cattle children. but with no large scale plan anymore, I’m not sure if that’s gonna work. If any human stays behind, as I’ve often talked about before, the cycle just starts anew and I’m really curious if TPN will go for a morally grey ending like that.

Unless the whole “evil-blood” religion works out this time when the high class is gone. but even Sonju is already in part a counter-example so... we’ll see I suppose.

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I really loved this episode though! If the anime continues this trend to the finish line, it’ll stay a wonky 7 for me :) (quality wise, you guys know my tpn brainrot won’t make me truly hate it pff- tpn love too big-)

[stevie2101]

TFATWS Episode 4: My (Unwanted) Thoughts

In chronological order this time, my semi-live thoughts

Oh, the Wakanda theme gave me CHILLS and made me so sad bc of Chadwick

Sebastian Stan is an ACTOR. Holy shit, the complete misery and pain in his expression. Wow. An Oscar (or whatever the fuck the award is) for this scene alone.

BUCKY CAN SPEAK XHOSA?!?!

Ayo, an utter BADASS

I have not heard the word "Turkish Delight" since Narnia oh my god.

Zemo, I love your little dance, but you singing 'Black Sheep' is just creepy. Also the whole stranger with candy is a bad vibe lol.

Okay, Zemo immediately correcting his head when Sam called him out on it is SENDING me

Sharon walking past armed guards with no hesitancy and them moving to let her through immediately is making me suspicious. I haven't believed any of the Power Broker theories, buttttt

JOHN WALKER IS SO FUCKING ANNOYING. AS SOON AS I HEAR HIS VOICE, I'M READY TO THROW DOWN. Respect to Wyatt Russell. Ya'll better not be hating on the actor. BUT JOHN WALKER CAN GO FUCK HIMSELF.

Oh Battlestar actually listening to logic. Well, here's some logic: GET A BETTER BEST FRIEND.

Not John trying to manipulate Bucky. Please Bucky, don't listen to him.

Sam is such a good man. I love him so much and I'm glad that brought back his time counseling vets. He really has a way of talking with people. He has a different background than most of the Avengers, struggled in different ways and I feel that's why people feel like they can open up to him.

....I hate John Walker. This is officially a John Walker hate blog. I really hope Karli beats him.

Good for you Zemo! We don't need anymore super soldiers.

*throws hands into the air* why am I not surprised? Oh course that's John Walker's end goal. I really hope Battlestar will see him for the power-hungry asshole he is. Steve took the serum to help people, John wants it because he feels weak.

God I love the Dora Milaje, they could kill me and I'd say thank you

....did this man just call their spears "pointy sticks"? That feels racist.

Zemo gone.

The Dora Milaje WHOOPED him. I cheer.

Does anyone know what Ayo said to Bucky before she said "James." I'm real sad he couldn't properly express what was happening. Maybe he could if he went to his therapy.

Sharon still giving me sus vibes

Why am I getting bad vibes about the situation with Battlestar. Is he about to die?

Yeah, why the knives? Is the serum not a true one? Does it start to weaken? I felt like Karli should be healed by now.

Ah shit, he dead.

Holy shit, pause. The way I gasped so loud. I hate this bitch but I NEVER thought he'd almost decapitate someone and brutally murder them like that. And with Steve's shield? Holy shit. Oh my god, I'm so glad people are recording him doing that. There needs to be evidence. When Steve thought his best friend died, he sat in the corner of a pub and tried to get drunk. He didn't kill a man in cold blood like that. I'm still floored, my brain can't function.

Karli, I feel so bad for you. The horror.....That's like the third person that has died that believed in her. The third person in like a week that she trusted.

People are terrified of him. As they should be.

Okay, um, I...I literally can't function. The government has to take away the shield from him, right? I mean I won't be surprised if they don't, but there's video. Oh, but they'll play it off because he was a "terrorist" even though that guy didn't do really anything. This is starting to feel like an allegory for police brutality.

There's definitely going to be global outrage though. A lot of people were identifying with the movement since the majority of the Flag Smashers were trying to help people. And the new Captain America, who is supposed to be a symbol of peace and justice, just brutally murdered a guy without bringing him in for trial.

That poor girl who just got his autograph. What about John Walker's wife? Like she might have bad taste in men, but damn, what is she going to do? I wouldn't be surprised if she leaves him. That coupled with the government maybe taking away the shield might send him into a crazy frenzy after Karli.

Where the hell is Zemo in all this? Is he going to see what John Walker has become and decide to end him? (I wouldn't be mad if he did). What's up with Sharon?

Holy shit, only two more episodes and so much left. I just wanna see Bucky meet Sam's nephews and for Sam to save his boat 😭

[aragima]

hannibal questions! 🍖🔪

@nietzscheantrout @horrorlesbians and @hanniba1 wanted me to answer these hannibal questions and i wrote too much but oh well! thanks to all 3 of you ilu!!!

favorite episode and why: oh we’re just goin straight to the hard questions huh um OKAY so i think i can only do an ep a season - s1: SORBET SUPREMACY! you get to see the exact moment will looks at hannibal and thinks “.........shit. it’s him isn’t it. he’s The One. SHIT.” and that is so important to me - s2: this one is really hard maybe naka-choko? it’s so fucking gay and sexy. but tome-wan... but mizumono............ yeah idk - s3: torn between digestivo and the wrath of the lamb cuz they both hurt SOOO good much; i love will breaking up with hannibal and hannibal manipulating the situation so will can’t leave asldkjansk it’s so toxic we have to stan..... and for twotl i mean do i really have to give a reason every scene LIVES in my mind and it contains my favorite shot in the whole show:

that is LOVE baby! that is DESIRE! that is being ENTHRALLED!!!!

least favorite episode and why: i feel like they’re all so necessary that it’s kind of impossible to say but probably antipasto. i get sick of hannibal and bedelia’s shenanigans really quickly and as much as i hate to admit it... i miss will. i also think it was an extremely weak season opener and i blame it for getting the show canceled sjshshsgsg the resentment...

favorite side character: chiyoh or jimmy or actually wait— RANDALL TIER 🖤

if you could bring back one character who died, who would it be?: RANDALL FUCKING TIER. i want there to be a weird thing with him and hannibal and will going on. but also i love what his death did for will so idfk, other than him it’s gotta be beverly

dish prepared in the show that you would like to try eating/making: i was supposed to make hannibal’s osso bucco recipe like 3 weeks ago but it completely slipped my mind so i guess i’ll get on that my next grocery trip  

which side character would you kill off?: chilton just because for god’s sake just let the man DIE ALREADY poor guy <- i’m taking ava’s answer because YEAH

was there any scene that you didn’t like to look at?: nah. the skin ripping scenes at the beginning of either kaiseki or sakizuki (idk i don’t remember, i hardly watch s2a) are particularly brutal but i tough it out

biggest ship: i mean do i even have to say

why did you start watching hannibal?: my wife, who was my girlfriend at the time, and her dad were watching it as it was airing and i was like “oh cool hannibal lecter origin story” but due to inconsistent access to the episodes i would just watch it randomly and that is... not the way to watch hannibal. i gave up around the end of s2 but knew hannigram was It regardless. i decided to watch s3 for the first time earlier this year just to have finished it and was like HOLD UP and did an immediate rewatch that left me... well, how i am now

favorite hannibal fic if you’ve read any?:

oh boy. yall ready for this? all of these can be found on ao3 obviously (i’m so sorry this is so long but i guess i’ve been asked to put together a fic rec anyway)

as soft, as wide as air by blackknightsatellite, the ladders series by emungere, blackbird by emungere, consenting to dream series by emungere, taken for rubies by emungere, at first meeting by emungere, protect me from what i want by @alienfuckeronmain, god of the cold, cold wars by highermagic, the abyss smiled back by highermagic, pomegranate seeds by highermagic, absolute zero by highermagic, in the truly gruesome do we trust by sidnihoudini, TKO by sidnihoudini, oh dear by lunarwench, each according to its kind by chapparral_crown, a flood in our hearts by nanoochka, let me sinful be by darlingred, uncomplicated by stratumgermanitivum & youaremydesign, good bones by @damnslippyplanet​, like they do in babylon by @damnslippyplanet​, your obedient servant by kareliasweet, past our satellites by shotgunsinlace, only the tender meat by isagel, the shape of me will always be you by missdisoriental, a white-walled room by rodabonor, spleen et idéal by rodabonor, the paper doll series by rodabonor, a common point of interest by rodabonor [i do NOT like a/b/o stuff but if i did... it’s this fic], just thought you should know by earthsickwithoutyou, the sacrificial lamb by princesskay, transcendent suffering by itsbeautiful, not something polite by moistdrippings, leave your message after the tone by onewhositswithturtles, holes in the floor of the mind by feverdreamblood, crossing caina by feverdreamblood, the archipelago series by melusine10, but seas between us braid hae roar’d by kareliasweet

have you watched any of the hannibal films?: yeah all of them except manhunter! i grew up watching silence of the lambs because my mom loved it and i went thru a big edward norton phase as a teen so i’ve seen red dragon like 10 times

have you read the thomas harris books?: no and i’m not going to lmao #fakefan

favorite murder tableau: if we’re talking just hannibal’s- the judge. if we’re talking Murder Bad But Kinda Pretty like in general probably the mushroom people or the totem

favorite blood spill: will imagining hannibal while he beats randall to death or The Gutting of Will Graham

what’re some of your headcanons?: - will is good at shibari (backed up in canon: his fishing knots, the firefly man’s full body hishi karada harness) - hannibal rarely listens to modern, non-classical music but he’s a björk fan and he saw one of her chapel performances during the vespertine era and was Moved - will listens to classic rock (zeppelin, the doors, pink floyd) with some classic country (patsy, merle, johnny) and blues (billie, muddy, bessie) thrown in. he’s also a sucker for early/mid-90s college rock/alternative/grunge - will plays the piano (because of the piano in his living room) and the harmonica (because he’s country white trash); he’s kind of shit tho - hannibal fell for will somewhere between “my thoughts are often not tasty” and “you won’t like me when i’m psychoanalyzed” (love at first sight! at last sight! at ever and ever sight!!!) - will’s circumcised, hannibal isn’t 🤪 - hannibal’s a gemini!!!! adaptable, creative, intelligent, outgoing, impulsive, etc - will’s an aquarius!!!!! analytical, a loner, temperamental, unique, compassionate, etc - will’s mom was jewish go read my fic about it https://archiveofourown.org/works/26774326 - hannibal is an agender man (tbh i think of this as canon, it’s just unstated/undefined) - hannibal can speak russian, spanish, and a teensy bit of portuguese in addition to the other languages we know he speaks (lithuanian, english, french, italian, japanese) - will speaks limited amounts of french; he learned it as a kid in louisiana - ED TW will sometimes has a Difficult relationship with food due to food instability by the way of poverty as a kid and goes through periods where it’s hard to keep himself fed, but hannibal is so good for him in that way because he keeps him from going hungry 😓 (yes this is me projecting but also it makes SENSE) - hannibal typically bottoms but THEY DEFINITELY ARE BOTH VERS and will never stops being surprised by how much he loves catching a dick. every time is like religious experience. okay? okay - they’re also both very kinky and switches but tbh.... will was made to Dom hannibal like that’s the reason he exists he could drag that old bitch around by a leash and hannibal would be in heaven HANNIBAL WOULD CALL HIM SIR - the first time they have sex hannibal comes like immediately but he isn’t embarrassed because he’s hannibal fucking lecter and hannibal lecter doesn’t get embarrassed - i have a hc for their favorite sex positions but i’m not gonna put that here because i don’t want yall calling me crazy any more than you probably already do but if you wanna know just DM me all i do is think about them fucking it’s a curse - okay no more dirty stuff abigail called hannibal “dad” on more than one occasion and it was half-joking but it also felt comfortable to her; she never thought to call will “dad” because he’s a weirdo and never knew her as much as he knew his idea of her - hannibal taught her to play piano at the cliff house - beverly is pansexual!!! - brian and jimmy kissed one time when they were drunk and they NEVER talk about it EVER - chiyoh is straight probably. i know, i know, everyone says she’s a lesbian and if she’s a lesbian to you that’s awesome! she’s a lesbian! but idk i just think she’s SO fucking straight and tbh i mourn bc that’s my wife. she could MAYBE be bicurious... - chiyoh is non-monogamous and doesn’t do serious relationships, she doesn’t like the idea of being tied to one person ever since she left the lecter castle - she helped hannibal and will escape after The Fall; she told hannibal she would continue to watch over him and i think she did, she got them a boat and got them the fuck out of there - MOLLY IS DOING SO MUCH BETTER WITHOUT WILL. SHE’S SO GLAD SHE GOT OUT OF THAT WHEN SHE DID. she has a good, long talk with alana and finds out all the shit about him and hannibal that will never told her (and it was a lot), gets drunk and burns all his shit, and then washes her hands of the whole thing; moves to a different state, gets a girlfriend, and never thinks about will again

okay i’m capping it there or i’m never gonna stop!! i’m not tagging anyone cuz i think everyone has done this by now lmao but if you’re a mutual who hasn’t and you want to just do it and say i tagged you!! mwah!!!!