#i hate reddit but ive started just looking up things on there specifically because even tho most people there are useless trolls

[alchemiclee]

I hate when google something and get conflicting results and am too busy or tired to spend hours researching the truth.

i'll search for example "is *thing* good quality" and get one result that says "after many tests it's very good quality and is about the same compared to *other thing of actual proven quality* and is worth it"

then directly under it is a result "after many tests compared to *other thing* it's poor quality and not worth it"

google results are so bad and it's so hard to find anything unless you want to spend hours diving deep into results and doing different searches. just give me correct or helpful answers right away and not sponsored paid results that are full of lies!!!!

[birdsareblooming]

god i wanted to be positive about sonic superstars because i am about every sonic game, especially with how still negative everything around sonic games can be. It's visually stunning and they actually tried something new with the areas instead of green hill reskins, at least mostly. but im confident i'm not choosing to be negative and picking anything to be mad about.

the game is infuriating to play. when just running through the levels as sonic it's mostly okay, but later boss fights ESPECIALLY for trip's story you have to play more than perfectly, and even if you play frame perfect the game will fuck you over via lack of planning. A blue missile just won't show up on your screen or in a way that's reachable. multiple of final boss fang's attacks are one-hit kills, which wouldn't be so bad if all of these boss fights weren't 5-10 minute long segments, where if you die at the end to some bullshit you have to go back to the very beginning. this includes Fang in golden city, where in the in-between segments things will hit you offscreen.

multiple times in the gameplay you are punished for going too fast. not stopped, punished. hit if not straight up killed. The point of the game is to build up speed, and if you do what it's designed to do in final boss fang as trip, you hit a one hit kill barrier and have to start all over.

Speaking of Trip, i hate to say it but after looking at her for very long her unmasked design is disappointing at best. She looks like a recolored modern Amy. And if that was the point like it looks like it is, it's a dumb idea. They should've focused on making her look like her own character and actually like a lizard. Other than the thing glued to her head she looks like a recolored amy you'd find on a forum in 2008 and I mean that in a poor way. She doesn't look like a lizard or even a sunglider. They gave her a hair accessory and an undercut and called it a day.

activly while playing as her i wanted the helmet back on. it's a much more fun/different design. everytime i looked down at her I just saw Amy. full stop.

don't even get me started on her dragon design. it just looks stupid. not only should they have leaned towards a more eastern oroborus dragon but god it just. looks dumb. not only that but that super transformation seems too overpowered for a character supposedly forgotten by the main cast until recently or just. some random girl.

At this time i have not reached the final boss, this is in the state trying to beat fang and once again dying to some bullshit on the first phase. Ive only ever reached phase 2 once and got hit by an intakill.

i don't care if it's "authentic"

the old games were also hard as balls for no reason. they were based on an arcade-style idea despite not designed for an arcade, where you want the character to die a bunch and go back to the beginning so they waste their quarters.

not only is this not an arcade game, but you already got my 60 dollars. The old games had many problems with how they played that I only survived via save-states.

this game consistently made me wish i pirated it. Specifically for the save state feature. with that feature I would've actually had fun. But I'm sent back to the beginning of a 10 minute long boss battle.

it's 2023, not 1991. why is your game like this. why is her design like this.

especially after following the bullshit that was the master king trial specifically. one guy on reddit sad fronteirs was easy and they decided to make all of their games need frame perfect runs to be beatable.

not only is this a disgrace to wanting games to be accessible to anyone, but holy shit I have a disability. my hypermobility makes my fingers hurt after all this. anyone with worse disabilities are fucked, and again no easy mode or save stating is offered.

i don't know if doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results is the definition of insanity. but being forced to do the same thing over and over again for different results sure makes me feel insane.

if you read this thinking of buying the game and didn't have spoilers tagged. if you do. pirate the game. you'll have a much better experience than I am paying 60 dollars.

sonic superstars overall was disappointing in everything but visuals. and that's coming from someone who goes out of my way to spread positivity about sonic projects because I actively see them. I don't here.

truly the best way to describe it is disappointed.

[suffarustuffaru]

I've read some rezero crossover fanfics , but I really don't understand why some people like to impose the whole background and character traits of other characters on certain characters in Rezero, and some fics even directly stated that A in Rezero is in fact B from a certain work, which is very bizarre and disrespectful to both canon source material, it's like B is cosplaying A but is a completely different person on the inside, if you want to insert a character from other works into the rezero world why don't you just keep their original identity and characteristics? Personally, I really hate this type of rezero crossover fics tbh :///

anon i understand you so much hah.

i joined this fandom months before season 2 started airing, so i was there to see rz ao3 pick up and the fanfic scene in rz be more established—so seeing this trend in rz fic has always really confused me tbh?? 😅 and i dont personally like it either for the same reasons you stated. its just one of those rz fanfic tropes that i 1. am not very fond of and 2. am continuously confused by given these arent very fandom typical trends, theyre extremely rz fandom specific if that makes sense (the react fic trend… re:forgotten… etc)? and i dont often see crossovers treated like this in other fandoms, and rz in general seems to be a fandom that really enjoys fic because its kind of. astounding?? that theres a whole fanfic thread that gets continuously renewed on rz reddit and is almost always pinned right at the top of the page. its rare to get a fandom that very openly acknowledges its fic in this way i feel? but you know, you go on that fic thread and you see a lot of people suggesting crossover ideas that—as you said anon—tend to be very “rezero but character a is character b”?? its like such a commonplace thing that occasionally i just go through that thread out of curiosity and read it like you would a morning newspaper hah and you cant go more than a minute without seeing a crossover idea like that.

and if anyone else is seeing this and confused on what the hell that means, one example i see a lot is “rezero but subaru is guts from berserk” wkfndnd

i think subaru is the one this happens most to, just because various audiences have various relationships with subaru, mainly because there tends to be a habit of 1. using him as a self-insert and 2. thinking hes absolute hellspawn or the best most perfect person to ever exist with zero nuance, so the whole “person a is now person b in everything but name and looks” thing is so. telling. like sometimes when i see people talk about a character like subaru it always boggles my mind because its like?? do you… even like subaru as he is? and if youre warping rezero to be more like that other media youre crossing it over with, do you even like rezero either? anon saying “its like B is cosplaying A but is a completely different person in the inside” is exactly how it feels like?? T^T

and of course its not as if you cant write crossovers. i love seeing crossovers!! i read some crossovers myself and ive written a whole bunch of crossovers and i come up with all sorts of ideas. its super fun to do and i completely get it. but the “person a is person b” thing is odd to me because at the heart of it, it feels like it basically means “*insert character* but theyre not actually themselves”. and of course its not like you cant make AUs where things are changed from canon, or AUs where the character grows and changes in general even if its different from canon. but theres a difference between “im gonna put this character through shenanigans and see how they change as a person but theyre ultimately still the same deep down and im examining how theyd most likely realistically act in this situation if this happened to them” vs “im gonna change the entire point of this character until theyre only recognizable in name”. i feel like it completely misses exactly what makes these characters and stories so good in the first place.

also side note: headcanons are a whole different thing because thats just “i have specific ideas about how this character is like” and is usually fine unless youre being pushy about it or condemning others for having (innocent!!) hcs you dont agree with wkdndn

and okay, i also get it if people have issues with how characters or media are written and want to change it. i myself have issues sometimes with how tappei handles rezero, but i still like rezero and so many of its characters. you can critique a media without trying to change what the heart of it is, and rezero for example is ultimately a story with a lot of heart to it and clear purpose behind so much of its writing. and its clear to see some things this crossover trend because so much of it is done with subaru. because it 1. misses the point of all of subarus nuances, complexities, the intent behind his character writing, and what makes him so good in the first place and 2. shows that people dont want him to actually be subaru. they want him to be someone else, which is ironically a plot point that comes up again and again in rezero wkdndnd. its interesting that it comes up so much in rezero too, because i feel like its in part most likely commentary on how audiences react to subaru and often try to change him to fit what they want.

but yeah thats just my thoughts on this whole crossover trend in general 👍👍

[gadunkie]

rant post about the online queer community

hey after going outside and talking to real life people for a while Ive come to the conclusion that most of the online queer community is just horrible for queer people. hi reddit today Im going to ramble on about how the queer space on the internet has somehow regressed back into separation under a more progressive and performative light. so after being on tumblr for like, fucking 7-8 years or some shit as well as experiencing other queer spaces on other social media platforms (twitter and reddit, mostly twitter) for only a couple years, Ive come to the conclusion that people are so caught up in their own asses that theyve completely misunderstood and forgot why the queer community exists. side note: I dont care how messy this post is or if the points made are all over the place, this is tumblr.com who gives a shit.

as far as Im concerned, a lot of non-queer and especially religious people really dont like us queers. unfortunately we were all born in a world where we suffer as a minority under laws and power that would really rather have us killed than working together. as such a collective of queer people started banding together under a community where we were finally allowed a space to be ourselves and live as people. the community consists of fags, dykes, transsexuals and whoever was in-between or outside of those terms. our relation comes from how we are rejected from living normal lives for simply trying to express romance or identity in a way that would finally make us feel alive. so it would only make sense to band together and make sure each of us finally have a home and a life we always wanted to live, surrounded by people who would finally accept us for who we are, right?

ya!!!11!!11one thats the whole point of the queer community, to band together and finally be treated as people. but the one problem that I see nowadays is that the current queer community just doesnt fucking do that. Im bad at formulating problems in an essay-like way so Im just gonna make a list of things and explanations underneath ok? :) :) :) 1. the queer community unfairly fetishes women: now theres nothing wrong with liking women sexually or romantically or whatever, in fact it doesnt correlate with the above sentence at all. Ive noticed in my time on using the internet, that queer people tend to hate or forget people who arent women. whether they are men, or nonbinary, or both, or none at all. women have a much larger audience than other queer people and its stupid. its gotten to the point where I forgot that the trans flag included women, men, and those who dont identify with either. I just got used to seeing them depicted with women or feminine figures that arent cis. I literally didnt make the connection until a few days ago that people other than women completely belong under that community as well, yet Ive seen so much trans discussion that only involve women and no one else. lets change that please, people who dont identify as women belong with the rest of the trans community. I feel ridiculous saying that because I shouldnt feel like I have to even formulate that sentence at all.

2. the majority of the queer community doesnt care about brown people: now there are a lot of online queer people who arent actively or intentionally trying to be racist but I cant help but notice that they tend to forget about brown people a lot, specifically black people now that I think about it a bit more. you guys remember when a new version of the pride flag came out and it looked the exact same but they added brown and black colors onto the flag? strange that at the same time the blm protests were also really popular and part of current events at the time as well, its almost as if it was simply a performative gesture to signify what should have already been obvious. even after those colors were added, black people were just forgotten again. Im not even going to sugarcoat it I dont think the majority of the online queer community would even care if black people just died, because they already dont. but this isnt just about black people either, anyone with darker skin tones, no matter the ethnic group, are either used for diversity gestures or completely forgotten about overall. it has been pointed out multiple times that tumblr staff has actively silenced or banned accounts belonging to brown people. actually the only time I saw tumblr even care about shadow banning was when they started doing it to trans women, what a fucking shit show. its so easy to care about people no matter their skin color its literally so fucking easy, why is it impossible for the majority of this community to do that.

3. why are we fucking separating ourselves from each other: hi Im sure youve noticed that Ive been saying the word "queer" over and over again. first of all, if it bothers you, grow up. the queer community have fought for decades to reclaim phrases used against us dont give it power again. second of all, I prefer saying queer over lgbtqia+ because it unites us all under one word rather than an acronym pointing out each little category of queer people. theres nothing wrong with trying to create an identity for yourself that means a lot to you and makes you feel more comfortable for yourself, but I have to argue and say that certain labels just seem pointless and belong under ones that have already existed before their creation. yet I dont blame people for using different ones than the labels that have already existed because I think we collectively failed to inform people that those labels can have multiple meanings. bisexual doesnt just mean you like cis men and cis women, it means you like anyone you want to. transgender doesnt mean you are now the opposite of your assigned gender, it just means that you arent cis. it also doesnt mean that you need to have surgery done on you or that you wear different clothes than the norm either. although I see the point of creating extra labels, I ultimately think they do more harm than good. we have to stick together to survive, any more individual groups then we are as good as gone.

those are the general points that Ive wanted to make anyway. I would love to type more but I have a feeling that the reading comprehension on this site wouldnt survive the first two paragraphs.

the last thing I want to say is that you should find more ways to be together than try and exclude each other, because while youre calling yourself a "foxgirl bi lesbian enby demiboy" there are queer people in real life being kidnapped and mutilated for simply trying to exist.

please for the love of everything that keeps us alive and safe, find ways to stick together.

[elliebell77]

ok ive given this some thought and am going to dump said thoughts here. Sorry if it doesnt make sense lol

—

The first thing I thought when I saw this post was actually of Deltarune, or specifically Asgore’s house.

Now of course, you can make the argument that the state of his house can be blamed on the fact that he’s poor cause nobody’s buying his flowers and he keeps giving them away for free, PLUS he’s divorced which could have added to his financial struggles.

And I’m not refuting that. I’m not! I think a lot of this can be blamed on his financial troubles. HOWEVER, even poor, his room is still a mess. Disorganized, no sheet on the bed, random shit and flower supplies everywhere, the wedding flowers (im coming back to that later btw). Not to mention the color scheme itself. Looking at the juxtaposition between the actual shop and his room, the contrast is obvious enough that I don’t think i need to point out the difference in mood and colors, though I WILL point out the only real color in Asgore’s room is the flowers. And while this could be because the storefront has to look nice and professional, I think it also represents something about his character: The happy face he puts on for everyone (or at the very least, his kids) and the actual, dimmer mental state he’s in once you peel back the curtains.

There’s also the fact that, like in Undertale (which I’m getting to soon, I promise), Asgore’s life is one marred by loss. Rudy, for example, his best friend, is in the hospital and possibly dying. His wife left him and his kids rarely see him anymore. He doesn’t really have anyone to talk to, other than his flowers. To put it shortly, Asgore is incredibly, incredibly lonely.

I have a lot more to say about deltarune but I’m gonna loop back to it later + i havent played deltarune in a long time so there’s a lot i’ve probably missed/misremember

—

Now for Undertale. This is an interesting one, and I have a lot more material to work with because I remember more of that game lmao.

(thank you random reddit user for making these maps so i can rip it off google images to steal for my character analysis post)

Oof. Where do I start with UT Asgore.

I guess I can start with his loneliness. “Loneliness?? What loneliness??? He’s super friendly and regularly chats with citizens!!” I hear you yelling angrily at your monitor as you read this. Well, hypothetical audience member, shut the fuck up.

Ok but seriously, I thought about this a lot and while yes, Asgore is super friendly and outgoing, does he actually have any… friends? Like really good, really close friends. Sure, he has Undyne, but Undyne seems to be more of a child/student to him. Yes, he HAD Rudy, but as stated in the alarm clock dialogue, he passed away long before the events of Undertale. Gerson seems to have been a companion of sorts (war buddy?? Friend? Hard to say), but again, it’s implied they grew apart when Toriel left

Gerson dialog I was referring to ^

This means that, again, Asgore is alone. The only family he has left (that he knows of) locked herself in the ruins to get away from him and seemingly hates him, and while yes, Asgore does go out and talk to his subjects on the regular, he’s not necessarily close with any of them for one reason or another.

Which brings me to my big, fat point and the biggest reason I wrote this whole essay in the first place:

Asgore clings to the past (as a form of escapism?)

I mean, it’s painfully obvious in both games, but especially so in Undertale. I mean, just look at his house. The fact that it imitate’s Toriel’s, the fact that he tries so hard to imitate her butterscotch and snail pie, the fact that his kids’ beds are still both in their room, perfectly made, with their possessions still inside, untouched. Hell, he still has the nose nuzzle champs thing from 1998, which had to have taken place more than a decade ago now.

Toriel, on the other hand, has moved on. The kids’ bedroom only has one bed. The chair is well worn. Her room is messy, but lived in, with a journal detailing her life. Yes, she has a yellow flower, yes you can make the argument that she, too, clings a little bit to her old life, she’s very clearly moved on and dealt with her grief in a much, much healthier way than Asgore has.

Asgore’s house, in contrast, is just a cheap imitation of Toriel’s. A hollow shell, lacking the soul, the worn yet lived-in charm that makes Toriel’s so comfortable and welcoming. Asgore has not moved on, and maybe he never will.

We also see this in Deltarune (HA see I DID circle back to it), though not quite as obvious. Remember the wedding flowers? (you better, cause I specifically said I was coming back to them. bitch.) Not to mention the fact that he’s STILL trying to get Toriel back despite her obvious rejections (i mean, the poor woman’s thrown away so many bouquets of flowers that the trash smells like flowers 24/7)

This is shown, too, in the color language of both houses. I’ll put em here so u dont have to scroll all the way back up to see what i mean

The only real color in the room is the flowers. The only thing that lights up the house is the past. In a dark, lonely life, the only light to keep him going is the good ol’ days. The way it once was, when his wife was still with him and he still had 2 loving children. And he so desperately wants to get all that back that he’ll build and maintain an entire house that he doesn’t even seem to really live in, just to get a cheap imitation of what his old life was like

—

Is this evidence of PTSD? Well… no, not really, but it’s definitely evidence of depression, or at least some kind of psychological/trauma-related issue that he’s trying to escape.

For science. For those of you who have played/watched Undertale, do you believe Asgore may be depressed or have some level of PTSD? If so do you think this influenced his choices and actions?

[colemckenzies]

hi sorry to bother you but do you have any advice on how to make friends in your 20s? seeing you happy and enjoying your friendship group is so good and wholesome and everything i kind of want out of my life lol <3 any advice appreciated!

aw this is so nice!!!

i mean the biggest impetus for me was moving to a new city where i knew literally not a single person and then living alone in said city, so i had no choice but to go out and meet people like there was nothing else i could do. and i will say it has been really hard, particularly as i work full-time and study part-time, and have been recovering from some Stuff that happened in 2020, and even now it's sometimes A Lot because it does take me a solid 5 years of knowing someone before I'm like Yes Okay We Are For Real Friends And I Can Be Myself With You lol. but it has also been really gratifying and i do always recommend getting out there and connecting w people irl!!!

i obviously don't know what you're situation is or how much it aligns w my experience but with that said here are my Top Tips:

apps. when i first moved i met most people my age through Bumble BFF which is a bit cringe and awkward but it was a great starting point, it basically kick-started my entire social life bc you know that the people on it are ALSO actively looking for friends (literally the first person i met was so invested that they threw loads of networking events for everyone they had met and started a groupchat and i met a lot of people that way). also tinder lmao the two people i talk to/hang out with most are both people i met on tinder it's a great way to specifically roll with the el gee bee tees

clubs/societies. personally i find clubs really hard to commit to (see the work/uni time commitment lol i just get too tired) but the thing to remember is you don't have to do them forever. i joined all sorts of groups for a few months, and then when there were people there i really liked (who i knew shared an interest in whatever thing it was) i just stayed in contact with them. and then obviously if you really like a group you can keep doing it (i still do theatre and LOVE literally everyone there). these groups are good as well because they really cultivate Local Community investment in particular and i think it's important to interact w people from different backgrounds/age groups you wouldn't necessarily be Friends with but like they ARE your local community

community centres/local businesses. like that tiktok that says about Just Show Up Somewhere Regularly, like this could be going to your favourite coffee shop/community space and then just keeping an eye out for who else is always there at the same time as you, but ALSO could be more active than that. most of my main friend group are big contributors to the local queer arts scene and organise events w the local arts centre/pubs/etc so don't be afraid to ask your local institutions what's going on or if you can volunteer. again i think actively investing in local community is really key here and provides you a wide net to rely on and full of more individuals you can meet one-on-one

group chats are your friend. i love a groupchat these days i used to hate friendship groups in school bc it was so cliquey and required so much maintenance and ive always preferred hanging out with people one-on-one (still do) but now im in sooo many groupchats and it's nice if i have a free evening and feel like doing something and i can just post 'hey is anyone free' and then people r free and sometimes they will bring people THEY know and then i meet more people.

reddit. was not expecting this to be a thing and i only had an account for a very short while but my city's subreddit was SO useful when i first moved for finding out about events/clubs that weren't advertised elsewhere and getting local insider info. i personally didn't meet anyone this way but i know they did organise meet-ups and have a CITY DISCORD SERVER so that may work for u if your city has something like that lmao

be open to making friends. with the above said as ways to meet people u have to be willing to actually make friends with people!! in my town instagram seems to be the main way to low-committal connect w people so i made a public account and now whenever i meet the vaguest stranger at an event who seems cool im like oh yeah let's follow each other lol. say yes when people invite you places and be willing to invite other people to hang out if you think you would be friends! a good way to bridge the gap between Acquaintances and Friends is to tell the acquaintance abt something you're doing anyway so then it's no pressure. like if you're part of a local group (see point 2) or going to an event (see point 3) just be like 'oh I'll be at this thing maybe see you there!' and then if they are there you can talk to them more and if you do this enough times you are now friends. or just in general be willing to (casually) do nice things for people even if it might seem a bit weird like when I got new neighbours i put my phone number through their letterbox in case they needed anything i got someone i didn't know That well a gift just because it was something specific they'd been talking about i thought they would like i saw someone on instagram say they loved handwritten letters so i asked if they minded sharing their address - as long as you're polite and not pushy about it and don't mind if people just ignore it then it's nice!

cast a wide net. as u may have noted from the above points lol i think it mostly comes down to meeting EVERYONE and being open to EVERYTHING and not putting too much pressure on anything or anyone in particular so that you will just organically get closer with the people you're supposed to get close with and nothing is forced. its great to find your Platonic Soulmate or w/e but you do also just need a certain base level of socialisation and u gotta work with what you have. if you just assume that most human beings you interact with on a day to day basis are kind people with good intentions not only does life feel a lot easier but it's easier to remember that you are just Someone Who Lives In A Place and so are they and it's all fine.

think about people you already know. obviously it's great when you really Click with someone and meeting new people is refreshing and interesting but is there anyone you already know nearby who you've never been Friends friends with but you get on and could see yourself being friends if you actually invested time in it? reach out!! i think this is esp good bc as much as personality is a factor in friends never underestimate the power of just Knowing Their Name For A Long Time lmao. shared reference points in your history are huge even if you didn't actually talk to them at the time those reference points happened.

still take time for yourself. obviously the above takes a lot of time and energy and emotional effort and it's taken me over a year to get to the point that im at. sometimes it's really hard because i will have plans literally every day of the week and ive met so many people i COULD be friends with and then i feel guilty bc i haven't seen X person for three months lol. but i think it's nice to know that you COULD meet up with someone and invest in any one of those friendships you have but instead you are going to Choose to spend the weekend by yourself bc you are an individual WITHIN this large web of interconnected people and u still exist the whole time. like at the end of the day i am still in fact an introvert and when im with people i don't know that well i still mask a lot so i do need to take time to be by myself sometimes! and everyone is fine w that !

[hualian-blessing]

okay since i have already reached the 100 notes within the 24 hours mark, i will now put into more detail on what i said im super pissed at twitter rn on not only about the mcc but other things too.

this series would be split into possibly 4 (it depends on the riot twitter will do later) parts. so this is part 1 of the "twitter shut the fuck up with the petty shit ur doing" series

Part 1: Philza Minecraft Drama

section 1: what happened to have people dislike philza minecraft?

first off, time to show some screenshots to give more context to it.

have you noticed any pattern these people are talking about? if not, the pattern is people not giving the context or the thread that they claimed they see in the philza neg or the sbi neg tags. they just tell the public how they hate or dislike philza without giving the reason why.

section 2: mockery and favoritism

luckily for me, when ive been looking at the philza neg tag for 4 hours, ive come across a thread that talked about the philza neg. you can see it at the first two pictures. here's the big thing about the philza minecraft issue.

people are starting to mock or insult his looks, discredit his works that he contributed to the fandom, and/or "helping" the ccs who are close to him (and by "helping" i mean isolating him from other ccs). and when you ask them as to why they don't like him, they'll say "idk i just don't like him" or "he did these things that this user make a thread about months ago that got deleted when they were proven wrong by lots of people". knowledge is the key as they say yet these people just threw that key in the ocean and can never be found ever again because i don't know if they're informed or not, but philza already apologized about it back then in a livestream which fellow content creators such as wilbur and tommy did the same thing yet they specifically targeted philza? i don't even want to know what logic they have man.

section 3: alleged making jokes on systems especially those who have DID

ive also seen some few tweets saying he's an ableist by making a bit of redza (an alter ego of c!philza) without having the knowledge that the fandom itself created redza and the other colourzas. it's the fans who created contents of the colourzas and being an avid enjoyer of the creative works from his fans, he created bits and hcs of his character having different versions of themselves. in fact, i have a reddit post that explained the origin of the colourzas.

it's a character. phil was portraying his character who is an entirely different character all together from his main character (thank you @arachnidlesbianism for clarifying it). philza wasn't making fun of systems, he's just giving content to fans who like the idea of colourzas. that's it. that's only it. additionally, if acting as characters who are systems are bad, let's take a look at tommy's character who has severe ptsd and depression yet we don't see him get flamed as much for portraying this character while philza got hated for it. or how techno's character have voices in his head which is a common sign to multiple mental illnesses. is it good to act as a system despite not having a mental disorder and making fun of it? no, it's not. you're an ableist at that point and a scum of the earth. but is portraying a character who may or may not be a system good? as long as you know the difference of the actor and the character, then (for me as someone who has kleptomania and tourette syndrome) yes it's fine as long as they're respectful towards their character and the people who relate to that character. and disclaimer, i don't speak for all systems as this take is only my opinion and thoughts. i chose to forgive phil and the respective people that i will mention in the future parts. there are others that may be affected by phil's actions and this post is only clearing up some misinformation and the lack of context of the tweets to those who still don't know about it.

section 4: peepaw (ew old people)

now to the insult by using the slang 'peepaw' which means grouchy old man in southern culture. believe it or not, some people legit and genuinely hate him for being old. that's it. people hate philza minecraft because he's old. come on guys, i know we made fun of phil by calling him an old man but that was for positive annoyance and endearment towards him. what these people are doing are insulting him for his age and thought that maybe that's a valid reason to hate the guy. plain stupid if you ask me.

section 5: philza and his fans = boring people

finally, the discrediting of his contribution in shaping the mcyt of today. twitter really said people are old and boring for watching phil's streams. we watch it because his streams are chill and relaxing. so what if he's building structures in his hardcore worlds? not every streams should be action-packed or full of content twists here and there. his streams are literal comfort streams for the ccs you like (i.e. tommy and jack manifold mentioned this a lot in their vlogs). his fans found comfort in his streams even if its "boring" as the twitter users said. his story times are soothing, funny and sometimes out of this world. his friends popping up in his streams are enjoyable. his little bits and skits are humorous and cute. since you call us 'boring' at least we have more humor than you have in your entire body el o fucking el. not only that, at least we have an internet dad while yours is still outside buying expired milk :shades_on: (please don't take this one seriously).

conclusion

taking twitter's information on content creators should be taken with a grain of salt especially if these issues they deemed "serious" were already talked about before or has a different story from what actually happened. they focus more on the actions that happened decade ago where even some of the ccs who did this forgot about it instead of the current issues that people are facing rn such as the asian hate or the oppression of the lgbtq community. not hating the ccs who have fans that genuinely care for them and will feel guilty or ashamed if others hate the cc they like with no valid reasons or context as to why they deserved to be cancelled.

final notes for this first part of the series

if you ever know any of these people in twitter or you're mutuals with them, please don't send any hate or dts to them as in the end of the day, this is only petty drama. this take is also up to debate as i would to hear more from different sides of the spectrum of the drama. stay tune for the next parts cuz i can guarantee how wild this ride will be for you and i, dear readers.

[emilyoracle]

@onmywaytobe #this btw is why anything past a first draft is so intimidating#however I do think I’m decent at planning out the development ahead of time?? idk#i hate the idea of a second draft or third draft#i hate the idea of rewriting unless it’s really bad#the last couple steps are fine I’m good at line editing and copy editing#but the development is what’s so intimidating to me

@froggyfroo #incredibly based post#this is fenuinely something ive been struggling with - I've never really got past a first draft before#even tho for a few of my written eorks I'd rly like to - i feel like Idk anything about writing sometimes so this is i valuable to

You guys are SO valid haha developmental editing is also the bane of my existence. My advice, which you can take as you want (or not at all), is to seek out a betareader and/or do things step-by-step.

Finding a betareader is difficult in itself, but once you do, simply tell them you need developmental editing, that you want to look at the story as a whole and ask them specific questions relating to that goal. Does the plot progress too slow? Too fast? Does it make sense? Is the trajectory building in a satisfying way? Etc. Then wait for their feedback and use it to inform your own opinions and decisions. If you vehemently disagree with something, then you know you disagree and whatever they wanted to change you prefer to leave the same! Even that alone is invaluable help, because otherwise you might have not been able to form an opinion at all and/or waffled back and forth about it for ages. More betareaders are better, of course, but sometimes you gotta take what you get. Ideally, your betareader is not a family member or friend. They cannot be trusted to give you the full and unfiltered truth. Find a stranger. There are forums on Goodreads and Reddit dedicated to seeking out a beta, and surely you can put out feelers on Tumblr for betareaders as well.

Step-by-step is admittedly more complicated, I hope to compile an "editing masterlist" of sorts that's basically a checklist of the entire editing process but as I have yet to do that, here's my simplified (coughItriedtomakeitsimpleokaycough) break down of the stages of development editing: 1. Scan through your manuscript and create an outline. Whether this is just writing the chapters and the most important plot point in that chapter, or more in-depth summary of each scene is up to you. This allows you to look at your story as a whole with a quick(ish) glance. Even if you have an outline from before you started writing, it's best to pretend that one doesn't exist and make a new one off the manuscript to be sure it accurately represents it. Now you can track plot progression, see if there are stale chapters or scenes (or unnecessary ones), make sure the plot builds in a natural and satisfying way, etc. There are a ton of different frameworks you can compare and contrast against (like the most famous "Hero's Journey"), so you can certainly look for specific beats of such tried-and-true formats and conform your story accordingly. Personally, I don't think perfectly matching the cookie-cutter molds is necessary for a good story. If you feel confident enough in your own criteria, judge it by that! 2. Do the same thing, except with your important characters' arcs. Again, it's up to you to decide what the important characters are, it doesn't have to just be the protagonist(s) if there are involved side characters, and antagonists can get in on this too. This should be a different outline from the first, and each character should get their own. Really what you want from this is to track the progression of your characters (upward or downward) and see how it lays out. Is there a sudden change too soon or too early? Is the change justified with an inciting incident? Does the arc make sense? Are you satisfied with how the character changes, and who they end up being by the end? Look specifically at: motivations, internal and external goals (I want to be the best warrior vs. I want to save the world), biases, attitude/behavior, virtues, and flaws. Not all of these need to change, and what does change doesn't necessarily have to change drastically. It's up to you. But if the character is important, it's generally good storytelling for something to change in them, for the consequences of the story to have had some kind of effect on them. Keep in mind, an upward character arc generally takes flaws and improves them or turns them into virtues (e.g., an angry, bitter character becoming confident and resolute) and a downward character arc generally takes virtues and turns them into flaws (e.g., an extremely loyal and law-conscious person becoming ruthless and cruel in order to maintain their loyalty and the order of law). Again, this isn't OBLIGATORY, as nothing is in writing, you're allowed to do whatever the heck you want!

3. Consider the changes you want to make. Do this whatever way suits you best. If brainstorming/daydreaming is best for you, then go for it! If you like writing things down, do that. If you need to brainstorm and bounce ideas off another person, find someone to help! Unlike a betareader, this can be a trusted friend, because you might not necessarily need harsh truths, but only a fresh or second pair of eyes.

4. Once you've figured out what you might want to change, add, rearrange, or delete, get back to writing and implementing those edits!

If anyone else has any advice or ideas, feel free to chime in! I am by no means the authority on this, because, as I said, I also hate developmental editing lol.

[tigerdrop]

hey i just wanna say the long posts genuinely make my day. also can you talk more about gordon freeman character because the way you write him makes me quake in my gay little boots

i would love to talk about gordon freeman. thank u for the opportunity

the first thing i need to communicate about gordon is that this dude sucks. and i say this in the fondest way possible. he is a bitch from the moment he drops into the world until the moment he goes out. if you dont believe me, give it another watch! gordons mouthy and rude for no real reason, at least so far as “being a regular dude on his way into work” goes, and this dude goes around calling his coworkers names with zero provocation. (of course, we all know that the reason is because its a funny guy improv stream that borrows a bit from freemans mind, but im talkin from a character sense.)

but my argument isnt just that gordon freeman sucks. its that he sucks in a very specific way that i find insanely endearing. i love this dude. i love to hate him. hes awful in a very mundane sense - weve all known a guy like this, at least if youve spent too much time online - and its cathartic to watch him suffer because of it.

gordons a smart guy. as written, hes gotta be - hes a recent MIT grad, on his way to work at a top-secret research facility to do weird shit with crystals and theoretical physics. but the thing about smart guys is that theyre often......selectively intelligent. we can see this in the way that he has a hard time navigating his surroundings, and needs the science crew to guide him through it and keep him alive.

this is one of those things that is a natural consequence of somebody going through the game for the first time, but that i am interpreting as “gordon is kind of stupid sometimes”. its uncharitable but its not like he doesnt deserve it. he likes to boss around the crew as if he knows what hes doing, when he often very much does not, and is fond of demeaning their intelligence. hes real bad about this with tommy in particular, treating him like hes a kid whos playing at being a scientist when tommy is actually a decade older than him. all i am saying is that gordon ought to stay humble. hes awful cocky when he perceives himself as better than others.

which, i think, tracks with how cocky he gets when he gives up on the whole “well-meaning citizen” thing and just unloads bullets into people. he puts up a front of being a Nice Guy, you know, just some dude caught in a bad situation who doesnt like seeing his companions obliterate every NPC they come across, but that doesnt stop him from cackling like a fucking madman and mowing down aliens (and soldiers) every once in awhile. when he stops seeing himself as helpless and starts seeing himself as the one in control, the gloves come off. he gets mean. and i think thats very sexy of him

this, among other things, is why i am insistent that gordon freeman is a control freak. he desperately wants to be in control of the situation at all times, shepherding around the science crew primarily by bitching at them, but its of limited success. its futile. sisyphean. tommy, coomer, bubby, and benrey exist almost to torment him with exactly the thing that would make him suffer the most: a gaggle of people running around causing problems for him, but he cant go anywhere without them b/c hes reliant on them to make it out alive.

its perpetual suffering, and its cathartic to watch. and funny, too. and if youre a little weirdo like me, its very, very enjoyable. how twisted up he gets when nobodys listening to him! how sweaty and frazzled he must look. its cute, and it also makes me want to reach through the screen and shake him and tell him to just be a little nicer. he wants control but he doesnt know how to attain it, he doesnt know how to play nice like a real leader. i think its a neat contrast to gordon freeman as we know him in HL2, where he literally is the leader of the resistance and has to live up to it. this is gordon freeman but if he was moe through helplessness.

“helpless” is, i think, a great way to describe him. a core bit of imagery in half life is this sense of railroadedness and helplessness, with gordon freeman being put into play like a chess piece and having no choice but to move forward. and this iteration of gordon leans into that by being totally dependent on the science crew in order to make progress and Not Die. and hes also subject to the whims of benrey, local eldritch weirdo who has basically made it his life mission to fuck with gordon.

gordons anxieties dont help with that. if he wasnt so fun to stress out and fuck with, the science crew probably wouldnt do it so much! too bad for him that they like fucking with him so much that he was driven into a panic attack (multiple times, even, depending on your interpretation). hes got that real neurotic mindset. always worrying about shit that could go wrong, and attempting to exert control over his surroundings in an effort to control the anxiety.

IMO the real way to nail the Neurotic Gordon Freeman Experience is to combine the ever-present anxiety with his pervasive sense of self-loathing. he openly states that he has no friends and nobody seems to like him, and to that, i really gotta say, i wonder why. he doesnt really seem to factor in that hes kind of a bitch, and has way too high an estimation of his own intelligence relative to everybody elses. its really one of the worst ways to be: aware that people dont like you, but unaware of exactly why. if he was like, 10% nicer, he probably wouldnt have had half as many issues getting through black mesa, but also, its funny to see him squawking his way through the game. so, you know.

its stuff like that that makes me headcanon him as a dude with low self-esteem in general. convinced that hes not likable, not attractive, out of his element......impostor syndrome, except that theres some truth to it. this is a guy who truly does not realize how good he has it: he really is just an average shitty dude, and yet, somehow, benrey took a shine to him. some poor motherfucker out there actually likes him and wants to suck his dick. thats dedication

also, i keep bringing up “repression” when i talk about gordon. and hopefully, what ive been talking about helps explain why. he has a strong desire to be a regular dude, not just murdering his way through black mesa, but if hes pushed hard enough he leans into it. gets bossy. picks up a cigar off a dead soldier and takes a long drag, before smacking forzen around with a pistol and ordering him around. gordon freeman is a regular, kind of anxious guy who likes competitive swimming and streaming on justin.tv and making anime references, and he is also a guy who takes a filthy pleasure in making a trained soldier his bitch. and i didnt make up any of this shit - this is purestrain canon, baby. this is a guy with problems

to me, this screams the kind of guy who represses a lot of shit b/c he doesnt feel like its morally decent. you run into this guy a lot online: the wokeboy, the online leftist, the guy who spends too much time on social media websites. (like reddit. i think he would actively use reddit and he would never get any appreciable amount of karma but he never stops posting. its sisyphean! cathartic.) from the way he talks about “bootboys”, i think it tracks. he knows about imperialism, he knows about feminism, but at the end of the day hes your average american white dude who struggles with internalizing it.

a lot of those dudes struggle with sex and gender issues. (dont we all.) when youre trying to be a Good Person(tm), you spend a lot of time thinking about your own relationship to sex and kink and all that shit. and i maintain that a too-online dude who buries a lot of his control freak tendencies would also try to bury a lot of weird sexual shit in an attempt to seem Normal and Well-Adjusted and not like a little freak. i justify this by the sheer number of times gordon blurts out weird sex shit as a joke. there are only two outcomes to making that many piss jokes: either youre secretly a piss guy, or you lathe-of-heaven yourself into becoming one. i will stand by this

ive talked a lot about why this dude sucks. now, let me talk to you about what makes gordon so much fun to write. first things first: hes funny! a subjective evaluation, yeah, but both in- and out-of-character, hes aiming to be funny. and being the straight man to everybody else plays into that whole “helplessness” thing.

secondly: underneath it all, there is a good dude under there. gordon worries when his companions get hurt, he tries to clean them off and patch them up, and hes got his lil leftist heart in the right place. you could even read a lot of his bossy, bitchy demeanor as him wanting to make sure everyone gets out okay and doesnt hurt themselves. when it comes to animals and anti-imperialist sentiment, gordons a pretty good guy.

hes the kind of guy who would probably see a dog on the street and get excited and play with it, but would get really prickly about the correct way to put dishes in the dishwasher. control freak tendencies.

finally, subjecting such a miserable, tormented guy to even more psychological anguish is really, really fun. you feel a little bad for him, but he kind of deserves it. so many problems he goes through are purely of his own making, and if gordon would just relax and quit trying to hard to maintain control - of himself, of the people around him - and own up to having Problems and Issues, he would be a happier guy. but thats why its fun to bend him until he breaks. being a little control freak myself, putting gordon freeman thru psychosexual torment is cathartic.

when it comes to writing his thought processes, the fact that he is canonically some kind of psychotic (yes, i am boldly claiming this. suck me) and i am also canonically some kind of psychotic makes it easier to write what i think his thought processes are. i just give him my brain issues of “getting lost in thought” and “overthinking fucking everything”. a touch of paranoia helps. even if i dont explicitly label him as schizophrenic please know that i am writing him as a paranoid little nutcase at all times because, uh, you write what you know.

paranoid. anxious. of the mindset that everyones out to get him (which isnt helpful when everyone is out to get him). repressed and deeply Not Normal but trying so very fucking hard to be normal and well-adjusted. a control freak with sadistic tendencies who also really, really likes getting bullied by his best frenemy. a hapless little nerd who sounds really cute when his voice starts to break from nerves. and, most importantly, a dumb jock. do not ever forget this.

thats gordon freeman, babey. hope that helps

[justalitlecreacher]

I’m here to prove that Andrew Garfield’s portrayal of Spider-man/peter parker in The Amazing Spider-Man is objectively the best love action adaptation of the character. In this essay I will....(yes this is really happening)

Edit: 10/20/20- i want to indulge myself in spiderman content but finding non mcu spiderman content is exhausting so imma update this instead

TL;DR

Andrew Garfield is my favorite of the 3 Spider-Man actors. TAS’s Peter is more fun and dynamic than the cookie cutter “shy introverted nerd that has a crush on a girl who’s way out of his league” Peter in Tobey Maguire’s movies. I enjoy Tom Holland’s portrayal of the character, but hate the way Disney has written the movies.  I enjoy the characters, plot, and humor of The Amazing Spider-Man far more than the other 2, and i deeply wish we had gotten the third movie with the canon BIder-Man of Andrew’s (and my) dreams.

[DISCLAIMER: I HAVE NOT SEEN THE AMAZING SPIDERMAN 2 OR ANY MCU SPIDERMAN MOVIES OUTSIDE OF CLIPS AND REVIEWS ITS ALSO BEEN A VERY HOT MINUTE SINCE IVE SEEN A TOBEY MAGUIRE MOVIE]

Characterization

  Most arguments against Andrew Garfield’s Spidey( AG’s from now on) begin and ends with “he was a good Spider-Man but a bad Peter Parker”. This references an outdated post comparing all three Spidey actors.(Id attach the image here but i dont want the post to be too long(thats a lie this is so long what am i doing with my life)) The post also claims that Tobey played a good Peter and a poor Spidey; and that Tom is good at both “roles”.(Honestly I think it seems silly that this seems obey the “third time’s the charm” rule but thats just me).  Most people using this seem to be Tobey stans who have forgotten or ignored the rest of the post funnily enough, but the ones that go further into the WHY AG is a poor Peter are also incorrect. This argument also ignores the idea that there can be more than one version of Peter Parker which is blatantly incorrect.  Just look at Into the Spiderverse or the PS4 game; these provide 4(5 if you count the pig) versions of Peter themselves, and that doesnt even include the comics. 

 Arguments that go further in depth claim that the AS Peter is too cool or well liked by his peer to be a “true” Peter Parker. The evidence for this seems to be that Peter has a skateboard.(which what? didnt realize that having a skateboard would instantly make you cool brb guys). Adding to that i dont really see where people get the idea that Peter is popular or well liked. While looking for complaints i found this qutoe from reddit(theyve since deleted it looks like but i’ll add a link in the notes) “He's angsty, pretty socially awkward, has an aptitude for science, and is kind of an outsider. He gets bullied by Flash and he gets his ass kicked after trying to stand up to Flash. He isn't a "cool" person in any way (until the ending, in which he's best buds with Flash, so I'll give you that). While Maguire is more accurate to the 60s comics where Peter in high school is just a fucking loser with basically no friends, in the ultimate comics, Peter is more of the kid who has a small amount of friends, but isn't popular.”. Honesty i fully agree with this because once again, other versions of a character are allowed to exist. You can dislike one version, but its silly to dislike something for not being exactly like another thing.

Ive also heard that Peter isnt “nerdy enough” in this movie which really doesnt make any sense considering the entire plot happens because Peter was looking into some of his parents’ research. If he wasn't interested in looking further into his father’s work what reason would he have to go to Oscorp where he’s bitten by the spider? Why would he have become Dr. Conner’s assistant? If he wasn’t intelligent how did he develop the web shooters?(something that Tobey!Peter doesn't have to do out of plot convenience might i add).  

 Another complaint i see is that the quips he uses in the movie(the first one specifically it seems) makes him seem like an asshole. Honestly thats a fair complaint, but i think its a good bit of characterization; espcially if he does get better about it in the second movie like the internet suggests.The Peter in this movie is a rightfully angsty teen; of course he acts a bit of an ass to criminals(also i feel like its important to mention that he’s like that to criminals? its not like hes being a dick for no reason).

  Compare this with the Tobey Maguire(TM) movies. Like i said i haven’t seen these in awhile but as far as i’m aware TM’s Peter doesn't really do anything particularly nerdy in the film? I may have forgotten something( ok in the scene before he gets bitten he knows a cool spider fact) but he doesn’t have to invent the web-shooters because they came with his powers and he’s only at Oscorp in the first place because it’s a school field trip that he appears to be taking photos for. This Peter does fit the definition of outcast(friendless and bullied for it), but honestly i just dont like him. He’s weird and something about the character makes me feel like i should be a little grossed out every time he looks at MJ at the beginning of the movie.  

   I honestly don’t have any complaints for Tom Holland’s(TH’s)Spidey. Tom is a great actor and from what ive seen i enjoy his portrayal of the character.( He made me cry when i character i actively dislike died).  

Story

  I cant really say much for TAS story. It’s interesting but nothing special really. However, there is one scene that i don’t think i’ve seen anything like since( the closest would probably be the train scene in the original trilogy). 

 The crane scene. Early in the film Peter saves a boy from a car that has fallen off of a bridge, and at the end of the movie this becomes relevant again when it is uncertain that Peter will be able to get to the lizard to stop him in time.(as Peter is already injured and pretty far from the lizard’s location). The boy’s father is then revealed to be a construction worker who recognizes that Spider-man is going to need help to get to the lizard; he remembers how Spider-Man saved his son and organizes the rest of the construction workers to build a path out of crane arms for SM to swing from. All of them are putting themselves in danger by not evacuating, but SM’s actions in the first act of the film motivate them to do what’s right. 

  I love this scene primarily because it highlights something that i think is a really important part of Spider-Man’s character; his connection to the people he saves. SM is often shown interacting with and chatting with the people he has saved after the fact. One comic shows Peter accidentally scaring some bullies and then taking the time to ride the bus to school with them to continue their conversation and educate the students on bullying.( There’s definitely more but this is off the top of my head).

  Another scene in TAS that i love is shortly before the crane scene when Peter is originally attempting to make his way across the city to stop the lizard, and he is shot down by the police. They manage to unmask him before Peter comes to his senses( he had just been shot and fallen pretty far out of the sky in his defense). From there Peter is able to deal with the police while keeping any of them from getting a good look at his face. The one cop he cant take out happens to be Gwen Stacey’s father who had previously had an argument with Peter about Spider-Man(Peter obviously on SM’s side and Mr. Stacey against SM). Peter turns and allows Captain(?) Stacey to see his face. I believe that this is an example of an unwilling identity reveal done right. i really enjoyed this moment because Peter had just shown that he likely could have gotten out of this encounter with his identity in tact as he had just taken down however many men. This implies that it was an active choice on Peter’s end to trust that Captain Stacey would ultimately do the right thing and allow Peter to go fight the Lizard, rather than a final desperate attempt to get away unscathed. Whether or not this interpretation of the scene is correct or not it still gives the character a bit more agency than some versions have done with their identity reveals.

  In Spider-Man 2 Peter starts to lose his powers because he’s having internal conflict about wether or not he should be Spider-Man. Honestly thats kinda neat and i might want to give that a rewatch. As for the one i have seen i don’t have any complaints. I do however prefer the way that Peter was bitten in TAS because it was a result of him poking around where he shouldn’t’ve been rather than him just happening to be standing in the right place for a spider to land on him. 

  Onto TH’s movies; the way Disney has treated Spidey in the MCU is why TH’s is my least favorite version of the character. I feel like too much of the story revolves around Iron Man; Iron Man made Peter’s suit and equipment, Iron Man introduces Peter to the MCU(via blackmail but thats another rant for another annoyingly long post), its Iron Man that “makes” Spidey in this universe rather than Spidey being self-made. In Homecoming(which remember i havent seen outside of clips so bear with me) most of the conflict is cause directly or indirectly by Tony’s refusal or inabilty to communicate with the teenager he’s meant to be mentoring

 For one the entire incident with the ferry could have very easily been avoided had Tony bothered to communicate with Peter enough to tell him that the situation was being taken care of. On top of that at the moive’s climax Peter is shown trying to get in contact with Happy(from what ive picked up isnt he a chauffeur? like idk his deal i just know he’s someone Peter got pawned off onto after Civil War). Peter even goes as far as to somehow hack into Happy’s phone(i think thats what happened it was a weird tech thing that shouldve been a red flag that the call was important though) but instead of listening; Peter is ignored. If this was a different kind of movie Peter literally could have died and itd be the fault of Happy and Tony like..... A large portion of conflict comes from characters being incompetent and not communicating and thats just poor storytelling.

Before this turns too much into an anti mcu rant id also like to say that the way they did Civil War was really dumb considering that Peter defects to Cap’s side in the comics, but whatever.

 Also i loathe the way they handled the identity reveal at the end of Far From Home. With MCU movies most people know to expect an end credits scene by now, but typically that scene is not important to understand what’s happening in the films; they just aren’t important. Putting an identity reveal here makes it seem significantly less important than it is. On top of that i dislike their use of J Jonah Jameson for this scene.

  JJJ is a character who has been repeatedly shown to have a genuinely good heart. All of his anger comes from a place of love for his city(he even says this hemself in the ps4 game when May writes in to tell him that he needs help). He hates Spider-Man because SM reminds him of the masked man who killed his wife; JJJ has never been able to get past that( and Peter’s antagonism of him definitely doesnt help) However, JJJ has been shown to care for people; he has a son who he often brags about, and one comic shows that JJJ is paying Peter for “amateur” quality photos because he knows that Peter is having a hard time and “just need some help”. JJJ has even learned Peter’s identity before and kept his secret for him(seriously though i cant remember the name of the comic but its defiantly worth the read), and in the original trilogy when Goblin threatens JJJ he claims that he doesn’t know who sends in the photos of Spidey because he does it via email( this is a lie). The MCU will have a very difficult time convincing me that JJJ would ever out a teenager’s identity and put him in danger like that. It goes too far against his character.(this could be hypocritical of me to say considering how i just insisted that multiple versions of a character can exist but whatever ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) 

This is accidentally turning into an MCU rant but id also like to say that i hate the lack of a TH!Spidey origin movie because it gives you no motivaion for Peter becoming SM or explanation of his powers; most people will know these things but if youre unfamiliar with the character its bound to be confusing(and im a sucker for origin movies)

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

“So Happy Together” Analysis

i don’t sleep

tl;dr: tbh not much to go off on about. i think we see a new skin for Iron Bear, one with some stripes. amara smiles, i do talk a little bit about little sisters in bioshock but tbh i think this was all just a stylistic choice lol. oh and handsome jack’s masks- probably Mount Jackmore. i don’t want to get to freaked out over jack returning, but damn gearbox lol u had me there for a second. im pretty sure it’s just a reused cut quest from bl2 that they never got to implement. 

EDIT: here’s all the cut content in bl2 (plus all the non-cut content as well for funsies). you can go to the cut quests and see the audio files for claptrap’s jackmore quest

holy shit can i just vomit all my emotions rn, they’re all good so imma do that so im rational when i start analyzing stuff okay? okay! 

holy shit that was fucking great and im really glad i tempered my expectations to something smaller than i thought because i feel bad for people expecting something huge, i was under the assumption we’d be getting a new mechanic that was like ‘choose ur +1 and they’ll be able to play the game with you if you’re both online even if they don’t have the game’ which was what someone said on reddit. altho im sure the poor company is gonna get spammed now with hate like ‘WTF YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE BUILT THIS UP AAAA’. not to lie, i was slightly disappointed it wasn’t a longer stream, but i mean if they’ve got nothing to announce, they’ve got nothing to announce and HEY! new trailer!!! gonna be combing thru on the assumption this has some easter eggs like the MoM trailer did, just in case. i thought it was a cute trailer, gearbox never explicitly said what it was gonna be, a lot people all just assumed what was gonna happen was a demo/beta which sucks so i hope this doesn’t negatively impact people’s perspective of the game. im staying off reddit for now bc when i first checked it people were pretty pissed and i dun need that negativity lmao

okay! emotions are LOCKED behind closed doors. i am shifting into study mode. here we go boys/girls/those of us who know better. haven’t done one of these in a while, let’s see if im rusty at all.

claptrap! and the skull on the chair which reminds me of tyreen’s “favorite skull”. 

tv says “we are under attack, please stand by”

and afaik claptrap is near the beginning of the game, you can see part of the recruitment center behind him when the camera pans.

im thinking there might be something in the roses, specifically the hand-drawn roses later on in the trailer. will be keeping an eye open for that.

this is specifically a jakobs brand chest. i really like the see-through aesthetic of it

intro area of the game again. possible hint to the opening cutscene? tbh i was worried that’s what we were about to get because i haven’t finished the roughs of my mock up lol

so what i didn’t notice my first time through is that you can then see claptrap, also being shown in the chest

waving up at the camera. that’s not trippy at all or anything lol

this car in the foreground (with no one driving it, mind you)

randomly combusts, looking quite like elpis in that one shot of the claptrap presents pandora trailer. wonder if that means it’s gonna ‘splode.

ohhh it spins. please no spin imma get motion sick blech

shot of some cultists. one appears to have a jetpack near the bottom right there

another explosion to the beat

the shock wave!!!! that’s awesome

shock nomads cultists are back. f in chat for our shields

another cultist seconds before he gets blown to bits

it cuts to black for a secco as it moves thru said explosion

another cultist, i assume a psycho

finally some good fucking angles

heh.

idk what i expected from someone who’s first action skill line i ever heard was them shouting MAGIC WALL!!! TAAAADAAAAAAAAH

as a side note

who is shooting those lasers

we see them coming from behind the VHs, but

there’s nothing there

SPOOKY~

they’re coming from... the wall???

tfw u shot urself in the foot on accident

amara is not amused

`is this some human custom i don’t understand yet`

also i hate that i’ve done this exact dance before when i took dance classes as a kid

with less style of course, i was like 7

moze is into it, hell yeah

this reminds me a lot of Kingsman. where all the blood is like fireworks and stuff. i wonder if that has anything to do with the psycho brainwashing. like little sisters in bioshock. they see roses instead of blood, right? maybe there’s something like that going on with the psychos

i’d certainly hope our vault hunters aren’t brainwashed, anyway.

this dude looking SHOCKED to see that tho, lmfao

i relate to this man on a spiritual level i stg

man he looks pissed

omfg lol

“um”

“i guess this is okay”

the body language in this is gold i am just having the time of my life

adsfdgfhgjhgfk

this is so cute

also in retrospect, i think this is one of the turrets we see on promethea. i wonder what it’s doing here!

moze u ok?

oh nvm she’s into it, look at her! she’s dancing! She’s Dancin’!

oooo one of the robots from the we are mayhem trailer! okay you can totally see why i think they’re jakobs, RIGHT???

iirc this is a maliwan soldier

man this is a crossover event, isn’t it?

i get it now. togetherness. i gotchu gearbox.

some maliwan ships in the sky. possibly sanc-iii on the right? or a ship of the same model as sanc-iii!

this is a magitek dropship, change my mind

eh, they both start with M, fuck it.

no idea what fl4k is doing here

mayyyybe shielding themselves from the ‘firework’/confetti shower

i like that the confetti explosions are backed up by purple, you know like eridium/slag/siren powers. seriously, maybe this is just how to cultists see us Vault Hunters and the mass murder.

at the very least, the psychos.

fl4k’s into it. i wish we knew the name of their skag, if it has one. i hope it does.

well now the lasers are coming from the other side! what the hell

moving on

i think this is the HBC from the speakers, plus im pretty sure that skull and the stained glass are the entrance to mouthpiece’s arena

we also get a different colored explosion. im paranoid jack is somehow making a return (please god no), so i’ll just note it’s the same color as his eyes.

AND the chests are vomiting out gold guns, which i think, gold-plated gear, is the cult’s way of signifying standing. which im sure is a tongue-in-cheek commentary as gearbox gives out a gold weapon pack as a pre-order bonus. no, like, it even shows up as an ad on the video

smh gearbox lmao

oh, also, the cultists are doing fuckin flying impressions

im not saying its a reference to the cultist with rakk wings on the cover, buuuut

bitch it might be lol

it’s an upside-down vault symbol! ive been trying to figure out what that is in those screens for the longest time!

back on promethea and we get to see fl4k’s spiderant in action

their skag, too, of course

the jabbermon in the back there, too! i wonder if they’re going to be shock or cryo. i would imagine shock given how they’re glowing

also i love the way the flowers look in contrast to the character models

moze is so happy aw

i love the way fl4k’s skag comes flying in and slides to a stop. such a good doggo ;-;

this is beautiful, i want it as a wallpaper

moze skipping? holy shit

100% verified the best thing i’ve ever seen

i lied. this is.

is this the fast travel station effect?

also! IB is looking a bit different

i wonder if this is a redesign or if IB is wearing a new skin moze picked out

pan over to zane who clearly doesn’t notice the being of darkness and horror in the doorway

oh also, we’re on eden-6 now. which would explain the fast travel effect

psychos dancing on the rooftops lol

oh god my eyes

nothing to really say here, i just like this screenshot

pink shields booyah

this is so fucking cute

we also get a better look at that one facility on eden-6

is that... red i see? >w> i won’t say it i won’t i won’t say it i swear i just- ATLAS

fuck

i like that zane’s clone spawns with his melee attachment

not AS excited as the real life version though

GB pls let this be a zane emote

is that a varkid? on eden-6?

wtf is a varkid doing on eden-6???

more shots of the facility btw. reminds me a lot of sanc-iii so maybe this actually is the supamax mfg construction facility like i originally thought. hmmmmmmm

ah yes, of course

holy shit what is this a reference to?

im told it’s the sex pistols

the back of the bullet turns into Athenas

pans in

amara!

enemy with a top hat on. some variation of/upgraded gravedigger? it’s like a psycho but recolored with blue pants and a top hat. you can see it fall off when amara shoots him

y’know, these guys

some rakk in the background

i am hoping bc this is a celebration of togetherness we’re seeing all enemies everywhere, not that the planets don’t have their own unique fauna.

she’s so happy omfg

oh, you want some?

Uhhh then there’s THIS sequence

they’re doing the flying thing again lmao

there’s also whatever that black blob is on the left. a spaceship maybe?

car wheel

all their eyes started glowing red. uh oh gamers

also another fast travel effect

hmmmm... zarpedon is that you??

back on pandora.

“super 87 racetrack”, maybe this is near that motorcade fast travel we saw?

huzzah! rainbows!

i do believe that’s sanctuary-iii

another ship. drop ship?

elpis is looking nice this time of year. definitely not explode-y. yet.

pret-ty sure that’s iron bear. moze is standing atop the tower lmao

also! back to it’s old paint scheme. looks like moze was using a skin or smth

we also have this. are my eyes failing me or is that a big cross on the left? could be where jack was buried. 

also i know there was cut content in bl2 about Mount Jackmore! and this looks like a Mount Jackmore to me. it’s a cut quest where claptrap asks you to basically ruin the thing. but since the quest was cut, it’s still here in bl3. maybe they’ll reintegrate the quest lol

i can’t imagine it being roland’s gravesite. because it looks like the below.

i do know we’re going to roland’s grave in bl3, but the statues don’t really match up. maybe it is and the statues were broken, or ruined or something and replaced by a cross. could be then that the gravesite was defaced with, well, the guy that killed him. 

im really hoping jack doesn’t make a return. im fine with dealing with what he set in motion, and his influence, and probably even some ECHO logs and movie trailers, but please, for the love of god, don’t actually bring him back, AI or otherwise. im really excited for the calypso twins, i’d really hate to see the focus shift back to that guy. he’s had his fingers in every borderlands game. it’s time to let him go.

idk what this is exactly. it looks like maybe that weird eye bot troy stands next to in the intro for the behind closed doors panel?

goodbye mr magical jakobs chest, it’s been real

the RC now has red drapes going down it. have those always been there? i don’t remember those

hmmmmmmmmm maybe we’re looking at it from the back 🤔

anyway, that’s all she wrote. i haven’t see any hidden morse code messages or anything yet, but if something surfaces, i’ll be sure to add it here.

[fipindustries]

my experience with my gender and my sexuality

because i think it is about fucking time i talk about this somewhere. this is a cheerful post, intimate sure, way too oversharing, certainly, but i like to think of it as joyous sharing because i feel like i can finally talk about this stuff freely and gosh ive been keeping so many things on the inside and now i just want to shout them to the world, consequences be damned

for years i have fantasized about becoming a woman. i will say it here now: i want to be a woman, i want to try it, i want to know what is like to look like one, to dress like one, to be called one, to be treated as one. if after a while i get bored of it, or tired or figure out its not my true self, or it just doesnt fit me for whatever reason then i reserve the right to back off and try something else. but for now this is my state of being and im going to share the story of how i got here.

my earliest memories of dealing with this confusion are about me reading a magazine talking about trans issues and me watching the movie “ma vie en rose” and “boys dont cry”. i was too young perhaps to be exposed to these ideas in such a candid and direct way. perhaps not mature enough to fully process or understand what i had seen, to the point that for most of my childhood i had this irrational fear that i would become a woman when i hit puberty. that my dick would just shrink into a vagina, that i would start growing tits, that i would get pregnant, etc.

i was a very unmasculine child, i didnt like sports, in fact i didnt like most typically boyish stuff. i thought muscles where gross, i thought violence and fighting was scary. i thought most boys played too rough for my taste. i was meek, shy, and a huge nerd. but i also had a strange rejection for most girly stuff. it was too soft and frilly and silly and pink and yucky. on top of all that, my understanding of trans people was mostly shaped then by drag queens and outrageous transvestites whose aesthetic, to this day, i find garish, over the top and unpleasant to look at. sorry, is just not something i identify with.

during this time i started to engage in all sorts of strange games as a child. i would start trying on my sister’s panties or my mom’s panties in the shower. i would created these elaborate scenarios where i would have all the stuffed toys in my room “kidnap” me, force me to give birth to them and then breast feed them.

cartoon shows that dealt with themes of gender bending held a powerful fascination to me, i particularly remember the fairly odd parents episode “the boy who would be queen”. i had this strange sense of love-hate relationship with it and anything on that topic where i just couldnt help to be obssessed with it but at the same time feel like it was illicit or transgressive for me to watch it.

then i hit puberty and a light switch went off. where instead of being scared or unnerved by those ideas i just kept obssessing more and more over them. i started googling everything i could about gender bending, about gynecomastia, about how to grow breasts with certain herbs or supplements. it was specifically on the breasts that i was fixated, i kept promissing myself that i would get them no matter what.

at the same time on the outside i was more than comfortable presenting myself as a boy, a geeky boy sure, but a boy all the same. i liked wearing high waisted pants, tucked in shirt and tie. i liked having short hair. i fantasized about growing a mustache. what’s more i definetly identified as a boy. i went to an all boy’s high school where we were taught stereotipicaly male things like working with heavy machinery, welding, general workshop engeneering stuff and i enjoyed all of it. i was still a huge outcast and not the manliest person but back then i figured it was because i was just a huge nerd.

i had no rejection of my body or the changes it was going through, i grew hair, limbs, genitals, etc and didnt thought much of it that i can recall, beyond a vague sense of not wanting to look too adult because it made me look too much like my dad, with whom i never had the best of relationships. beyond that socially i was a boy and had no issues fitting there.

i masturbated a lot, and a lot of those fantasies involved gender bending. usually boys growing breasts, boys being subjected to forced feminization, etc. there were other fantasies but those dont have a lot of bearing on the subject at hand. one of the things that excited me the most back then was to call myself a woman. to insist over and over that i was a girl. like the feeling that i was brainwashing myself into femminity was a huge turn on (this is why for the longest time i was convinced i was an autogynephile, and honestly, jury’s still out on that account). then, as soon as i finished i would quickly tell myself “im not a woman” as a strange way of “no homo” myself from my fantasies. i was still doing ocassional crossdressing whenever i was alone at home with my mom’s clothes, again, usually for the purposes of masturbation

i have been attracted to girls for the large majority of my life, it wouldnt be until college that i would experiment with boys too and found that i could enjoy that as well, but my main interest has always been consistently girls. yet a lot of the time my attraction towards girls would come from a place of envy. of apreciating how pretty they looked and wishing i could look that pretty myself. once i started college most of these fantasies came with me, i kept researching about gender bending and about ways i could try to gender bend myself. some times it was because of fetishistic reasons but a lot of the time was because i just found the subject inherently fascinating. it was like this that i came across a lot of information about trans people, back in like 2011 and when i first started to really understand them as a community and grapple with concepts such a gender dysphoria and such. back then i reached the conclussion that while i understood and sympathized with trans women, i was just a crossdresser because i didnt experience gender dysphoria and because i had never experienced anything even close to the feeling of “being a woman on the inside”.

what was more, it was around this time that identity politics really started to get traction, things like “die cis scum”, “yes all men”, “white men tears” etc started to be thrown around and, as someone who had been identifying as male for his entire life, i felt personally attacked by most of it. an immature reaction on hindsight, but a reaction that cemented in my mind the idea that i was a man and there were no buts or ifs about it.

i kept crossdressing, i kept fantasizing, i kept fetishizing. i even experiemented with auto hypnosis because i was realizing more and more that i was never going to be able to truly make my fantasy about becoming a woman real so was was willing to try anything that would get me even close to it. i cross dressed because i liked the way i looked, i liked the way the clothes felt against my skin, i liked the feeling of trying on a different role, one that was forbidden to me. as time went on i stated doing it less and less because of the sexual gratification and more for its own sake.

then the crisis came.

i wrote about this before, i saw a bunch of people i knew coming out of the closet at an advanced age, people like jacob chapman, the wachowsky sisters, even reading about the story of how allison bechdel. the idea of someone figuring out their identity way into their adulthood shattered my world view and it introduced me the possibility that i might be in the same situation, which led me to panic. all the crossdressing, the fascination with gender bending and with trans issues were strongly suggestive if nothing else, but back then i was just not ready at all to confront those possibilities so i supressed like a mad man.

three years later, here i am. during those three years i slowly and gradually came to grips the possibility, slowly losing my fear of what i might lose if i came out of the closet, slowly examining my self and comparing my story with the story of others in the community. finding differences but also finding a lot of similarities. for the longest time my trans ex girlfriend would insist that i was very much not trans because a lot of my experiences were very different from hers, such as the fact that i never had issues inhabiting the rol of a boy whereas her dysphoria had been strong enough to the point of suicidal tendencies for most of her life.

one of my biggest concerns had always been the fact that i had heard from many trans people that their dysphoria hadnt really kicked in until after they started transitioning. as in, once they started trying to look like women then they realized how far away they were from truly being one, making what until then had been a vague feeling of discomfort into a true rejection of their own body. but then on the other hand there was also the real possibility that i would end up having a mental breakdown once i hit my fifties after years of repression and by that point i would look like just an old man in a wig

i think what finally made me tip over the edge were the contra points videos and the reddit community egg_irl. i just identified too much with what i saw there, and breaking up with my gf had left me free to explore those feelings without fear of ruining my relationship. so where does that leave me?

still confused, but no longer scared of the answers. willing to give this and honest go and see where it takes me. im still not ready to call myself a trans girl with all the letters. i understand that gender is complicated but i would really appreciate a unified theory of gender to help me make heads or tails of what i am and what i am feeling beyond vague notions about “the spectrum” and “social roles”. i guess i could be considered gender fluid as of right now but honestly that label doesnt mean that much to me on a practical sense considering i am still presenting my self as a boy in my every day life with one or two exceptions

i have a lot of work ahead of me and for once i am excited about doing it right.

[lydiahopemoore]

Initial research

To understand my target market and what user’s I'll be focussing on I wanted to first search around Reddit. Reddit is a popular social sharing website that collects current news, stories, pics, memes and videos through specific communities (subreddits) that the user decides on what they want to see. Every post and comment that is made, people get to upvote or downvote it so the best content rises to the top. Every user creates an obscure username to make Reddit an anonymous platform. Therefore I wanted to use Reddit to find subreddits and posts that relate to my topic to get a general understanding of how people feel. I have collected a bunch of comments from posts which I will not mention their username nor I will use this information for presentations or the final video. ^ = upvotes. This is an effective way to know how many people agree/relate to a comment.

Female gamers! How do you handle sexual harassment?

“I don't reveal my gender when I'm playing online games and I only tend to play with a group of known friends.” 101 ^

“I mostly don't let people know I'm female until I know they aren't assholes.” 38 ^

“Two ways.

mute, report then block.

I don't play with the general public. Only with people I know and with people they know.” 17 ^

“I don't play with the general public. Only with people I know and with people they know.” 29 ^

“Honestly, in my personal experience so take it with a grain of salt, its not so much a gendered thing as it is an asshole thing.” 51 ^

“I don’t play games where I interact with people I don’t know anymore. Before that I’d usually ignore it and remind myself that my existence will never be as pathetic as theirs is in that moment.” 9 ^

“My voice is super girly so I cant hide the fact that I'm a girl. I normally record the audio or mute the offender. It happens a lot on Counter Strike and Rainbow Six” 14 ^

“The female gaming population there is pretty high, and the number of idiots is relatively low. Mostly I just tell people to fuck off if there’s an issue beyond specific skill and block/report them. 7 ^

That being said, my guild leader for one game mode is a massive misogynist and I just call him out constantly.” 7 ^

 “Mostly by not playing online games anymore” 4 ^

“mute/block them , i dont need to argue with sad lonely losers” 5 ^

“Iv never come across anything like it at all. In any game I’ve played” 8 ^

Gamers of Reddit, How do you feel about women who play video games and is the gaming community in all games really that toxic against female gamers?

“Female gamer here. It can be pretty toxic, but most times it's just amusing. As long as you know how to handle yourself in various situations it's fine.” 11 ^

 “I don't care who plays games. What pisses me off is how oblivious people are to leaving an OPEN MIC on with a tv going and your family shouting in the background.” 9 ^

 “I've been gaming for years but with games like Overwatch, PUBG, and Fortnite now including public voice chat, I've become shy and somewhat intimidated by the voice chat feature because I know as soon as I use it with a team, I'll either get mocked because I sound like a 12 year old kid or because I'm a girl. Though when I have used it, my team just assumes I'm a kid.” 6 ^

 “You know what? The opinion of "gamers" on women playing games doesn't fucking matter. Not to mention the fact that you have juxtaposed "gamers" and women, suggesting women cannot be gamers. Women play games. Women are gamers. Get the hell over it.” 4 ^

 “Not toxic at all, for me. Most people don't seem to care that I'm female, and it's never really affected my gaming experience. That being said, I hear a lot from other female gamers and it seems to be an issue for some.” 4 ^

 “The community is just as toxic to females as it is to males.” 3 ^

 “I don't think the gaming community is toxic toward female players. Not as a whole. There are lots if individuals who are toxic, though.” 2 ^

Female Gamers, what do you hate the most when people find out your gender in a game?

“No a female gamer but I hate how as soon as a female speaks in-game it turns into sexist trash talk that goes way over the top or pandering, both make me cringe hard. I feel bad for squeakers too cause not all of them are toxic or even bad at the game but they get hammered so hard.” 9 ^

 “When people randomly add me because I was pretty good or got a little aggressive on coms and they find it sexy. I do really enjoy getting free stuff in certain games though.” 9 ^

GirlGamers let’s talk about sexual harassment and abuse and what we can do to help improve our community. 

“It’s really hard to go into a game and even TALK, let alone mention I am a woman. I sound like an 11 year old boy so it masks it a bit, but when I mention i am a woman, damn. The language changes completely.” 143 ^

“I think one of the worst things about the gaming community is how guys refuse to acknowledge the sexism, and when they do it’s normally in a negative context. Or when a woman brings up sexism they’re told that they should just toughen up or ignore it. It’s not that simple, and a lot of the people who say that have never had to face people doubting their every move because of something they can’t control.” 102 ^

“I think we need to make more friendly spaces for women with an emphasis on lgbt women and women of color. There needs to be all women gaming conferences, classes, and discussion groups (much like this one).” 51 ^

“I think we would need to bring awareness to the issue with a viral movement. If we picked a day to stop hiding from voice chats and post any and all harassing situations that day with some trendy viral hashtag maybe it would get media attention and further shed light on the issue.”  23 ^

Why are there more male gamers than female gamers? Is this statistic even true?

“A: Oh! This is what I studied! I can finally contribute!

Q: Why are there more male gamers than female gamers? Is this statistic even true?

A: It's actually not true! The split between men and women in gaming is almost a perfect 50/50. If you include mobile gaming (which I do, but that's an entirely different debate) then women actually make up the majority of gamers!

Q: So what things in our societies push more men and fewer women to pick up video games?

A: There are a lot of compounding factors that come into play here. For starters, when video games were first becoming a thing, it was a primarily male interest. Only a small percentage of gamers in the 70s and 80s were women. As such, it was mostly marketed towards boys and men. When more people started taking an interest in gaming, many men felt that their hobby was being encroached upon by an "other". In this case, that other was women. So on top of being marketed mostly for men, the community itself was (and still very much is) incredibly hostile towards women. That's another factor that pushed women away.

When we look at the situation today, it still seems like more men are playing than women. This isn't because that's actually the case; it's because the anti-women toxicity present in the community never faded (and in some cases it's merely festered and grown more vile). As such, women that play video games are much less likely than men to make it known that they're active gamers.

So, to answer your second question, male gamers are the main societal factor that pushed more men and fewer women to publicize their gaming habits. In this regard, the gaming community is very similar to the tabletop gaming community and the comic book community.

Q: Are the numbers significantly different in various cultures across the world, where their society may be different?

A: Surprisingly, it's a similar situation pretty much everywhere: women play games, men treat them like garbage for doing so, and then women keep quiet about their gaming habits and rarely participate in official tournaments.

Overall, it's not that women are less likely to play games, it's that the community is so toxic towards women that very few are willing to out themselves, so to speak, as women while playing.

The entire history of women in gaming (both as gamers and as developers) is an incredibly interesting topic that's worth reading up on, but it can mostly be boiled down to "holy shit, calling the gaming community a hive of misogyny is probably a huge understatement.".”121 ^

I need to vent about female gamers in the gaming community for a second.

“I am a female gamer. No. I am a gamer who happens to be a female. I play everything from Animal Crossing, to Skyrim to LIMBO to CoD. I love gaming and it relieves stress and helps me relax. Gaming is a large part of my identity and I am not ashamed of it. Studies have shown that 48-52% of gamers are women, which is HALF. So why do we get so much shit for it? Women gamers, especially in communities like League of Legends and Magic the Gathering are shit upon. The view towards female gamers is ridiculous, and I am so sick of it. Women gamers are constantly underrepresented in both the games we play and when we are we are hyper sexualized. Even as a female gamer I am often sexualized. When people see a female gamer they accuse them of being illegitimate, and only doing it for attention. Even me, a female gamer, when I see a female gamer I think that "oh she doesn't look like a gamer" or "oh she isn't a real gamer, she's doing it for attention" and this is stupid. Why do I think this when I am a female gamer? Because I have been taught my whole life that games are for men, and if I am a woman I am doing it not because I enjoy it but because I am doing it for a man.” 69 ^

“I find myself often guilty of being quick to judge other people as a "gamer." I try not to label people, but it gets so shoved down our throats all the time that it just happens. For me, I'm half afraid its because I get called out as "not a gamer" or some other such nonesense and so in my defense I start to judge other people harshly. It takes a conscious effort to change the initial thought.” 3 ^ 

“I don't know if it's because the only "social" genre I play is mmos, but the majority of other female gamers I encounter fall into two categories; shy or attention-seeking.“ 2 ^

[not4eating]

Unfiltered and unedited. Rabid thought produced while thinking about an essay prompt.

should be something of interest to you and something that speaks to your values, ideas, and relationship with your larger social world.

Possible topics for writing project 3

What makes it debatable? What are various directions you could take this topic? Which one are you planning on choosing and why?

God damn, I don’t know. What are the things that are important to me? Fucking fuck this shit. I can’t think about this kind of stuff right now. I’m already stressed enough. My work life balance is so fucking off. As it stands I don’t like any of the stuff that I’m learning about. I’m stressed all the time. I’m working harder than I ever have and I have the worst grades that I have ever received. Wtf. I got a b in my last humanities class and I didn’t even do half of the assigned material. That balance  is incredibly skewed. Like what’s wrong with college. What the fuck is wrong with it. How does something like that happen. Where a student can put in literally no effort one semester and receive straight a’s and then the next semester they try even harder and then can barely pass their class. That actually reminds me. I need to cite socrates for my most recent assignment in Humanities 01. Her class is the one that I’m complaining about here. It’s too difficult. I feel like I’m cracking because of it. I mean. I can lie in that class. If I lied I would probably get a better grade. None of these teachers actually read what you write. They don’t actually care. So if I wanted to I could just bullshit everything. As a matter of fact I think all of school is bullshit. I also think that we should be paid to go to school so we don’t have to fucking work full time just to support ourselves while we have another full time career. Like, at least pay people up until their associates. Ive been going to school for seven years. That’s an insane amount of time to have suffered through academia. I wouldn’t mind if it was only academia that I had to deal with, but the fact of the matter is that academia is the part of my life that I actually enjoy. In order to support myself through college I have to work a job that is mentally draining and I have to do it for fifty hours a week and even then I barely make enough to survive. So what is the solution? Free housing for full time students and a free cafeteria for full time students that serves decent meals that you request the day before. If you don’t request a meal then they don’t make a meal for you. If you want to work while you go to school then you can. But all students must maintain at least a c average in order to remain in the program. If a student falls below a c average one semester then they are put on mandatory academic counseling in order to maintain their access to free housing and food. What happens to students when they lose their access? That’s a good question. Im not sure right now. Punishing them would be counter intuitive. The goal is to create an environment where everyone feels welcome and motivated to succeed.

My whole point is that I don’t have enough time. I can’t find enough time to do all of the things that I need to do. I feel unproductive. But at the same time I need to sleep. I have only been getting about four hours of sleep a night on average. I finish work. I make dinner and clean up and then I get to work on my homework. My whole body shakes all of the time. I get light headed, sometimes I lose hours of my day to nothing. My mind literally blacks out. Would my day be better if slept? Do I still have those multi hour long unproductive spells? Yes I do, want when I sleep. I just lose focus every now and then. Have I tried Adderall? I absolutely have. It helps for certain things. However, at the end of the day, its far less effective than everyone says it is. I’ve worked my way up from 5mg to 40 mg and even then its like “yo, this stuff doesn’t really do what it says its supposed to. Even at sixty mg instant its about as effective as a cup of coffee. The only thing that seems to be able to get me out of my head long enough to be productive is alcohol, which is so bad. I spent all of last semester drunk. I got incredible grades. I had more than enough time on my hands to spend with my spouse, which I can’t say for this semester. The only issue with this is that I was fucking drunk all the time. I gained 40 pounds and spent my work day on the verge of vomiting. I got in a car accident because I was so tired that I could barely keep my eyes open. I am literally killing myself. I am literally killing myself. I am literally killing myself. The structured lifestyle is torture. Day in and day out, the same thing over and over again. I’m worried that when I start estimating its going to be the same thing. Ill be fine for a few months, and then at the eight month mark ill hate my job. I need to be free. I need to be able to write and talk and interact with he people of their world. I need to write, and I need to write about what I want. Is this form of writing any different than writing by hand, I don’t think so? Maybe? Ts fine and all writing on a keyboard. It’s been at least a decade since people have been writing this way almost exclusively. They question is have novels gotta better or have they gotten worse. I can only say that I am almost incapable of reading anything modern. Especially works that may or may not become literary classics. I also can’t read as fast as some people. I wonder how they read all of the books that they read. I think that after I get my bachelors I’m going to focus all of my free time reading new literature. A novel a day would be a good goal. Why should a three hundred page book be difficult to read in a few hours? I recently read a 200page book in a day and had a great time of it. I even took copies nots with is unusual for me. I was ony able to do that because it was a part of the curriculum. If it wasn’t a part of that I wouldn’t have read it and I wouldn’t have been able to even have the time to read it

What really gets me is the academic research paper. Why do we have to do research on random ass Tomic and write papers about it. They always say that you can write about whatever you want to talk about, but when I write about something truly world changing like I did about big data all the back in fucking 2007 when nobody even cared how the teacher tell me that it was in irrelevant topic that was too broad. I mean its not a broad topic alt all. Data collection and the issue that occurs when it is collected. Ie the stealing and unregulated sharing of data is complete bullshit. Nobody cared then, it was n issue that fucking mattered then and it fucking matters now. Big data is so important. What you search, what you read, what you are interested in is your own person. It is who you are. That is what makes it so incredibly valuable. When we live on the internet we think in the internet. Everyone that uses the internet shares there deepest thoughts to google and reddit. Even those that don’t are texting it or keeping it in their notes apps. Its like if someone had access to your diary, your personal conversations, and your alarm clocks, because even alarm clocks are digital now. They have access to this information, and they use it against you. They even know what you watch, and how much you pay attention to what you’re watching because they know when you’re on your phone scrolling through facebook. And this sounds crazy. It would have been crazy 50 years ago. But today it is not crazy. People are watching you all the time. They pay attention to the conversations that you have in front of smart speakers, they watch you on security cameral. They check your GPS data at all times. They read your emails, they look at your nots, they check your interests and disinterests. They know that you slow down when you see s=certain things and they know that you speed up after certain things. It sounds stupid. It sounds ridiculous, but all you have to do is look at the power at your fingertips as you read this very article. Look no further than your damn phone. You fool. If you think anything is private, just know that everything you do is being watched and recorded. Not by people of course. But by computers. Computers who are profiling you. Learning how to manipulate you specifically. What keywords turn you on. What keywords piss you off. All they have to do is out the right thing in front of you and you will either buy what you’re seeing or at the very least recognize it. That’s where this whole thing gets so fucked up. Advertisers, politicians, random Russians, random Chinese people, random anyone with enough resources to make you do a thing. All they have to do is know what catches your attention and then right before or after that they show you the thing that they want you to see because even if you’re only looking at the dog, nike is at the top of the page and even though you're not fucking looking at that shit, you like running, and you like dogs so all they have to do is put that shit in front of you enough times and suddenly the nike swoosh is one of your favorite things in the world. You have familiarized yourself with it. It is now safe says your lizard brain and suddenly it's only of a few dozen things that you like to see. I can guarantee you that if I showed you something that you didn’t understand. Just a random mark. You wouldn’t look twice at it. You might even associate it with something cheap in comparison to nike. This is regardless of the actual range in quality. You would still buy a thing form nike that was produced for half the price but sold to you for double the price than you would the other thing. No matter how smart or how critical you are there are basic human instincts and those instincts can’t be denied.

Can you even fucking change this thing. Is it established in childhood. I have a cat who is skittish as hell. I love cats, I would never hurt one but still she loves me but is afraid as hell of Perone else. I raised her, I adopted her when she was only thee months old and yet she behaves the way that she doe. Was this behavior bred into her or is she skittish because she had observed me being uneasy in front of strangers and therefore learned this behavior. I don’t fucking know man, but its the exact way that internet marketing, marketing in general really. Its how it works. You are more likely to eat at a McDonalds than you are a regional fast food chain when you’re driving through a town. Your more likely to stay at a marmot than you are a Hilton if you were raised in a town that had a marmot and didn’t have a Hilton. You’re more familiar to marmot because its what you’ve seen. Its what you know. It was the nicest hotel in your town  that has other hotels across the world. Even if you associate it with a shitty crowd, you know that its still a good enough place to sleep for a not unreasonable sum of money. Human instinct. If you know a place is safe you know you can sleep there without being completely uncomfortable. Its the same thing with internet marketing. If it doesn’t apply to you think about cable. Think about the groceries you buy from a person behind a counter. Think about the places you use your bank cars which goes through a computer and knows where you are and what you’re buying. You’re shits not private. It never will be as long as the internet exists and continues to improve. The rise of the machines isn’t brought about by a machine that kills you directly. rough about by a computer that divides us against perfectly fine people until we eventually kill each other via nuclear winter. The more we allow the world to be determined by the people that write algorithms that feed us content and places to go the more likely we are to fall prey to an algorithm built with malicious intent. This is because most people don’t know how to read code and the ones that do most of them can’t read or write code at the level of the one percent of the one percent that decide what happens on the internet. Or rather, that the algorithms that they people write that curate the web for them.

Compton could literally be anywhere. La is the creative capital of creative work because the degrees of separation between you and your friend base and the people who decide what’s produces are like two or three at tops. Compton isn’t special. Eve lived in the area. It’s not the hood, everywhere is the hood, Sacramento is the hood. People that live in fucking Ladera heights can claim that they live in the hood. People from Sacramento are just as cultured as anyone from la. people from Folsom are just as relevant as the millions of people from la. hip hop beats are just chill study beats. These people sit in traffic all day every day. That’s all I have to say about that. La is great, but so is Sacramento. So is every other city in the us. Most towns are just as special people just need the encouragement to create. One in 20 is a genius. When you get 20 people together even for a moment you have a guaranteed stroke of genius. People are genius by nature. There’s nothing special about plato, Picasso, or Okonma, they just found a small group of people to speak to who spread their message far and wide and now they are who they are. God I didn’t realize how much I needed to just yell these things to. The thoughts in my mind that sleep in my unconscious thought. I wish that I could just record all of my thoughts. Maybe I would think the same things less often. Venting in a permanent forum Is so nice.

[douchebagbrainwaves]

AND YET IT'S TRUE

This argument applies to every aspect of server administration: not just overt falsehoods, but also all the more reason for startups to write Web-based software will be written on this model. I won't try that again. Google, which prides itself on sending users on their way quickly that anything that takes up their time is competing with it. For us the test of whether a startup understood this was whether they had Aeron chairs. You could launch a Web-based software, you're practically forced to write the application in the same way the classic airline pilot manner is said to derive from Chuck Yeager. 0 mean anything? VisiCalc was such an advance, in its time, that people never seemed to grasp new ideas at first. Good VCs are smart money, but they're forty miles away. Once you've got a company set up, it may seem presumptuous to go knocking on the doors of rich people, it has few nerds.1 Or rather, any client, and if they take it, they'll take it on their list of things to do. Maybe it's a good idea.

There were interesting things about the way we lie to kids is how broad the conspiracy is. What we really do at Y Combinator is fundamentally a nexus of people, to make something customers want. With server-based software will make new languages fashionable again. But it turned out they didn't like us, because our software was so complex. When a company loses their data for them, they'll get a lot madder. Like the rest of this essay I'll talk about tricks for coming up with startup ideas, you might do better to get a check within a week based on a half-page agreement. It's not the kind of things most people use computers for, a tenth of a second for a click to get to the server and talk to you through a Web browser. If you can figure out the rest as you go. And a safe bet. I don't see why it ought to be very valuable, it's not a sufficient one. This is the Formula 1 racecar, not a sedan with giant rims and a fake spoiler bolted to the trunk.

So the most successful companies we've funded were started by undergrads. Does Web 2. If you do have to leave grad school, or to get a check within a week based on a cursory examination of a huge pile of depressingly similar applications submitted by seventeen year olds. People look at Reddit and think the founders were lucky. You'll remind them of themselves. The other reason the number of big hits. We invest when the company is just a couple guys and an idea. The only way I can imagine this happening is if those in charge of sales was so tenacious that I used to feel sorry for potential customers on the phone with them. That m. I've written about this before: if a good idea. And technology for targeting ads continues to improve. Suppose you approached investors with the following idea for a startup to launch them before raising their next round of funding at a reasonable valuation; the giant company that was paying for him to go to grad school.

I thought about the question at all. What they need to get good grades so they can get into a client war, the only thing sure to work on them, technology will evolve faster per company as well. That's an extreme example, of course; when parents do that sort of solution: you don't beat the incumbents; you redefine the problem to make them irrelevant. Few startups happen in Miami, for example—that's not an innovation, in the best position to conquer the rest of the race he has to stop and take a rest?2 Google about some nasty trick their corp dev people can do. Our existence depended on doing these things right.3 There's still a lot of money to convince big companies that the people selling them the crap they currently use spend a lot of experience themselves in the technology world are used to that sort of solution: you don't beat the incumbents; you redefine the problem to make them your own. Even people who hate you for it believe it. When technology makes something dramatically cheaper, standardization always follows. I can't measure whether my essays are successful, except in page views, less than 10,000 lines of code when we launched. Web 2.

One thing we'll need is support for the new way that server-based software is never going to succeed as a startup. Besides being cheaper and better to work in, apartments tend to be about technology and design. I wouldn't quite call it Bubble 2. He didn't say anything, but I think everyone would agree that democracy and Ajax are elements of Web 2. Companies are likely to get better at it. College was a bottleneck through which all your future prospects passed; everything would be stable enough that we could imagine know-it-alls on forums dismissing as toys. Originally the only way to deliver software, but not design it. When PR people and journalists recount the histories of startups after they've become big, they always underestimate how uncertain things were at first. And so we changed direction to focus on the wrong things for six months, and the number of big hits won't grow proportionately to the number of big hits. If an undergrad writes something all his friends start using, it's quite likely to represent a good startup idea.4

They've forgotten most of them, we either try to remove it, or shift the startup sideways. Y Combinator seemed inconsequential. If you want to set yourself apart from other people, it's always a specific group or type of user. In later stage startups the questions are about deals, or hiring, or organization. Even Bill Gates, who seems to be able to benefit from it, by making things that save money. People won't wait as long to act on new ideas, but nearly all good startup ideas are of the second type. I buy more books because Amazon exists. It works a lot better for a small, dark, noisy apartment. It would have been for two Google employees to focus on one to the exclusion of the rest. When it turns up you often know what's wrong before you even look at the source, because you couldn't reproduce it in most of the time, a way for readers to get information and to kill time, a way for writers to make money selling programming languages, a lot of valuable lessons about the software business. It's that way with most startups too.

And yet Y Combinator showed us we were still overestimating people who'd been to elite colleges. There are some obvious dangers: pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. No doubt there are great technical tricks within Google, but the truth turns out to generate more jobs. They buy a lot of potential energy built up, as the market has moved away from VCs's traditional business model. Finding startup ideas is not the hours but the responsibility. It would be better if you went to a better place, or that can incorporate live data feeds, or that we'd meet them again. After decades of running an IV drip right into their audience, people in the entertainment business had understandably come to think of the techniques we're developing for dealing with large numbers of startups as like software. There's something interesting happening right now. Among them were Gordon Moore and Robert Noyce, who went on to found Intel, and Eugene Kleiner, who founded the VC firm Kleiner Perkins.5 Ironically, Microsoft unintentionally helped create Ajax.

Notes

It's not a remark about the size of the leading scholars in the foot. I was a new airport. But their founders, like languages and safe combinations, and Fred Wilson to fund them.

Even as late as 1984. Everyone's taught about it.

In both cases you catch mail that's near spam, but at least accepted additions to the size of a cent per spam. Y Combinator makes founders move for 3 months also suggests one underestimates how hard they work. They don't make an effort to extract money from existing customers.

In this context, issues basically means things we're going to work on stuff you love, or Brian Chesky and Joe Gebbia needed Airbnb? Download programs to encourage startups, you have two choices, choose the harder.

Conjecture: The variation in wealth over time, serious writing meant theological discourses, not you. So where do we push founders to overhire is not to do it for you.