#i hate being outside of my house
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#anyway shits getting worse#my utterly fascinating life#i cant believe them#we're actually doing this#we're actually going to fucking florida and then winnipeg over break.#pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease#i feel like im crumbling#physically#im so cold#and i feel awful#im not going to get any rest its just going to be go go go#i hate this so much#ive told them how much i hate it but he laughs it off and she doesnt do anything and doesnt help#to be fair the only way they could help is stopping us from going#this is a super great idea#launch me straight from my three week downwards spiral exam stress into two adjacent weeks outside of my house#i hate being outside of my house#i hate being outside of my room#i wish people would stop coming in#especially him#he said he wouldnt
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CW: I'm mean here about shows and stuff people like
syndrome from incredibles, Thanos in the comics, mad hatter from Batman, tighten from Megamind, frollo from Hunchback of Notre Dame, Red Hulk, parasite from superman and Ozai all of these villains are pathetic but they work for some reason I cannot place. A lot of stories try and write villains that are pathetic but also scary and it doesn't work- I love Starscream he can be an amazing character (he can be sympathetic or a straight up monster he can be lame but still threatening etc) and I like most versions but God can writers screw him up and he can fall flat (i love tfp i swear but god i hate their starscream! He just didn't work for me! Megatron and knockout are cool tho) Belos for some reason doesn't work for me at all- I know he should be scary while the fandom is wrong about him being a colonizer/cult leader/a dictator (he's not stop using words you dont understand the meaning of)and how insane it is that he's in a kids show (watch more cartoons there's villains darker than him) he's still trying to commit genocide and he's abusive and he's at his core got very little depth or complexity- he's really just an isekai character gone wrong- a pathetic guy with a hero complex and emotional baggage who becomes a villain- but he just didn't work for me. Neither does Jacob Hopkins- he's just Ronaldo from SU if he was written to be a straight up hate sink. I'm a lesbian latina with autism and was raised with a different sect of christan beliefs from him- I know historically this guy would have murdered me and i know he should work but something about him didn't stick the landing! The main thing I think about with belos isn't 'wow this guy is a great villain' it's 'can y'all stop being weirdly ableist toward this old man' or 'why do so many of y'all wanna fuck this man he's ugly' and dont get me started on mcu villains - their version of the mandarin, she-hulk's dumb men rights activists on reddit (seriously that's the scariest villain you can come up with? Like revenge porn is evil but really? I don't like the term man-baby- I have personal issues with how the term has been used in ableist ways- but yeah erm man babies on reddit are the best you can do for a villain? That's freaking stupid) and OMG Sutur in Ragnarok was terrible etc etc- these villains all suck!
How do you write villains that are pathetic but still work? How do write villains who are at their core whiny insecure losers but still work as detestable threatening villains? Like marvel made a character whose whole thing was that he's an incel work but so many other stories fail to write that stuff. Part of me thinks it's because these stories are desperate to make their villain into a hate sink joke but still make them scary and it fails but Tighten and Red Hulk are right there and there's no way the writers weren't purposely writing hate sinks with them! And they work! Why doesn't belos?
#red hulk#Syndrome#the incredibles#emperor belos#starscream tfp#she hulk attorney at law#jacob hopkins#thanos#Thor Ragnarok#claude frollo#mad hatter#toh critical#mcu critical#Tfp critical#I like tfp but God Starscream was just there and they dropped the ball with Miko#starscream#Based on everything I am I should hate belos#But I don't#The fandom I think has toned down their ableism toward him but it grosses me out still#This was a show were the MC was neurodivergent#Hunter has PTSD#And Eda has a magical chronic illness#And y'all were being ableist?#Then again hunter lost his physical disability coding and so did Eda#I also think Luz's neurodivergent coding reads as kind of ableist as does Willow's#I'm more fandom critical than I am show critical tbh I still like the owl house outside of season 3#Season 1 and 2 are still deeply flaws and that's part of the reason the finale episodes didn't work#But in a vacuum it's a lot more bearable#Call me media illiterate#Say all my complaints are in bad faith
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tis the season !
#the charcuterie board was devoured and ppl rly loved the cookies and the dates r usually popular#and the baked brie too!!!#and then ppl brought their own assortment of treats and drinks as well#i rly enjoyed my blackberry orange drink personally#my gf’s friend does really beautiful pottery and all the food she brought was in her gorgeous homemade pieces#was so fun i love feeding ppl and making things look pretty and festive#my gf did the insane lettering on the drink menu#and decorated so cutely#and then we all went to the halloween event at the amusement park afterwards and it was fun and cold and misty#and i mostly sat outside of haunted houses while they walked thru them haha#i struggle rly rly bad to recover from being startled and sometimes it just. turns into a panic attack even if im not like Scared?? idk#it’s stupid my body just can’t distinguish real danger from fun danger very well#but they had these “’no boo”’ necklaces i could wear so actors would then just interact w me nicely and creepily instead of jumping at me#which was still fun :-)#bummer tho i hate being mentally illlllllll#and rly embarassing bc the necklaces lit up rly bright so it was like i was wearing an im-a-weenie beacon#lolll#also shoutout to my mutual who recognized me while i was waiting for my friends and stopped to say hi LMAO that was crazy#won’t name names so i don’t dox u#but i’ve never been recognized from tumblr before was a very i like your shoelaces moment😭😭😭#top 10 most embarassing things to happen to me ever but thanks for saying hi !!!#personal
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Tragic how much effort the daily task of Being A Person takes
#neurotypical people i talk do don't understand what the fuck i talk about with this sentiment#but i feel like the tumblr user base will understand#Being A Person includes#but is not limited to#small tasks around the house accumulating. i do dishes again. i do laundry again.#when i don't have a routine: choosing something to do. making myself do it. managing to do it without being distracted#being disappointed in myself because i inevitably got distracted#when i have a routine: keep up keep UP KEEP UP#going outside. i know it's good for my mental health#but then i need to act like a Human Being Person#it's not really all that horrible. i manage#but it adds up to such an exhausting pile of all the mundane shit that everyone takes fir granted#and i hate how it weighs down on me#adhd#autism#neurodivergent
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˙ . ꒷ 🍰 . 𖦹˙—
#im currently at my sister's place. she wanted me to take care of our dog while she and my mom goes home to sort through their stuff#i have a very unpleasant headache after waking up early after no sleep. walking to the psychiatric for an appt. then having minor issues to#get here bc the train tracks were... smth?? and the train was late and idk. it ended up being painless to get here#then i went to buy groceries and then took the bus here. since i've been here once it is easier for me to navigate skskks#now im here and im happy to be with my dog :3 i havent seen him for an entire month :(((((#but it feels weird to be all alone.... i dont like it actually :// i mean if i didnt have my dog here it would be AWFUL#i dreaded a bit to take my dog outside bc she lives on the third floor and he cant walk down the narrow stairs. so i have touse the elevator#but that went fine!! its still not as easy as just opening the door and then go straight outside tho T-T!!!!#idk. i realize that im just.. a person who dont like change. i have lived in the same place my ENTIRE life. i havent moved once.#and even if it isnt as nice anymore bc um literally thousands of ppl have moved in the past couple of years... it isnt as calm at all anymor#BUT. i fkn love the environment and scenery. there are so many beautiful and pleasant places to walk. and sit. i just love and need to walk#i know every road and walkaway there.. i know which trails are calmer and nicer etc. we have parks and forests and all that#here is like just housing areas. like apartments and houses and stores and schools. and roads. roads everywhere... cant find a path without#a road next to it ://// it isnt calm at all bc there are always cars :( and um idk how im supposed to go for walks when there arent anywhere#to go. so yeah what im saying is that even if the place i live has gotten worse.. i still feel. like thats my home.#idk how to live anywhere else. and to think this might be the year i HAVE to move. i .. dont know how to adapt and settle into another place#i LOVE where i live. i love how its built and the neighborhoods and everything. i feel so so attached to that place. i know this is life etc#but since i have lived there my entire life and just now being away from it in a place that has 10% of what my home has im like.#idk it feels really bad and im just not into life at all rn. i wanna live in a place i like and just rot into it. never leave.#i dont like change... im realllyyyy homesick rn T-T esp being alone without my family sucksssss i hate it
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house + the main character by will wood..
#house md#hate crimes md#will wood#i can so imagine him saying “im the main character and you have to like me :3”#also “so god forbid im seen just as an average human being! i mean! imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene!”#“im the gap between a tragedy and comedy don’t come at me!”#get this song outside of my head pls 🫶#gregory house
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why did i get accused of sneaking out last night . i was at home sleeping and never left the house. i wasnt even doing anything weird. i was literally asleep in my bed. in my house. where i live.
#kris.txt#i hate this houseee I HATE THIS HOUSE#ik this seems like nothing . and in the grand scheme of things it is#but it's like someone walking up and putting another dish in the sink when you already have so many dishes to clean#ykwim#crazy thing is i snuck out many times before as a teenager to do awful shit and never was suspected of a thing#but a strange car pulls up outside the house in the morning and then leaves after like 10 minutes??????? ohhh kris must be up to some shit#despite the fact that they left without me and never came up to the house to ask for me or anything . yeah must be some shit im up to#like????#idk im just so frustrated and on edge constantly#i literally cant even exist doing nothing wrong w/o being accused of some shit for no reason#also how stupid do you think i am. if i was gonna ask a stranger to pick me up i wouldnt have them pick me up right outside the house#during a day when i know ppl get up early#idk idk. literally one of the more mild delusions my mom has had. but i just Hate being falsely accused of shit and treated like im lying
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#yippee look at that its wander:33#i do not draw my boy enough#anyways ive been thinking a lot about how i wish there was someplace nearby to watch the sunset#specifically that also doesnt have a bunch of people because the entire point is to not do that#cause i like being outside but theres just nowhere to go where im not constantly surrounded by other people#and the entire point of going outside for me is to not worry about people for a little while#it is shockingly hard to be alone ever#because “other people” live in this house because “theyre my family”#and the odds of everybody going someplace but me are so very low#ugh god i hate that the only two things i want are to move out and move on and also to never have to leave#why does everything have to be some stupid fucking moral dilemma man i just wanna worry about dumb shit for once#ugh anyways yay drawing#i havent decided if i hate the background yet so we'll see#and enjoy my epic musical selection that i doubt anyone ever actually listens to but theyre still fun to add#art#drawing#digital art#furry#sfw furry#sfw furry art#furry art#digital drawing#oc#oc art#oc artwork#oc drawing#Spotify#my art
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I think mokey is sick :(
#she's got another bald patch. the first one was in a spot I thought she just rubbed bald from sticking her paw under the door all the time#she's got plenty of energy and is eating fine but she's been shedding a lot for a while#its probably stress induced on account of well. being stuck in a little room with me#she's been allowed to roam more of the house lately though#but I have very little control over anything outside my room. and she cant be out when my brothers home bc of the neighbor kids#theyre careless and dont listen. theyd let her out :(#I hate this. I need my own space back.#sigh. well I guess we're both going to the doctor tmrw#she needed a check up anyhow#it speaks
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Me wondering why my cat and i have spent pretty much all day in my winter bed blanket and pillow nest and kinda shivering when I’m outside of it, checks my weather app

Oh. That would do it
#emma posts#listen. I love Minnesota but damn#some days I’m like ‘do we HAVE to have a competition with Antarctica?’#I know it’s global warming fucking with weather patterns#we didn’t use to get this this often#we also didn’t get as many summer droughts and temperatures in the 100s often#one of those things can give me seizures and it’s actually not the cold#lakes my beloved is fucking die without you#what good is enough snow to do outdoor activities if you would freeze too quickly#last winter it was too warm and dry and when we did get precipitation it was freezing rain#global warming fuckery#still. I at least don’t have to worry about seizures from stepping outside 👍#and it’s actually pretty when we have snow#the other night it was warm enough to snow and we got these huge flakes that looked all sparkly like big glitter chunks#and full moons on the snow are gorgeous#I don’t hate winter tbh. I just get cranky about extreme weather happening so often#for a variety of reasons from climate activism history to it just sucking ass#we used to only get days like this once every couple of years#now it seems like it’s either this cold or too warm for real winter#my family signed up for a certain kinda weather when they immigrated here a century ago#and this wasn’t exactly it. at least not this frequently#I’m just glad buildings have better insulation and weather proofing now#the farm house was bad enough before my parents remodeled over the years#you can still feel cold when it gets like this though#but I’m actually at my apartment right now and it’s usually a bit warmer because of everyone’s body heat and it being brick#my window here does have a break in the seal somewhere though#I’ve got six pillows. one of those chair back type pillows. and three blankets plus my cat right now#i would turn up the heat more but my cat and I don’t want to leave my bed#I should put socks on#thanks grandma for making me a pair of really thick pajama pants for winter
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also as a society plagued by wealth inequality and rising cost of living we really need to address how we show love through money. like I offered to come over to help them decorate their new house so many times and they kept refusing me 😞 I wanted to help them paint! but noooooooo
#like I get it she's a control freak and she just wanted her husband to do the painting#but I dunno it's like. that is something i would have enjoyed doing and I'd rather do twenty different odd jobs around your new house#than scroll an amazon registry#and I get that I should just shut up and fork over the cash and just accept it gracefully ...#and to be very clear that is what I am doing. that is what I did. I already ordered an item off their registry.#but I dunno I just wish there was a way to show a sense of community outside of money#can't bring them food because she has gestationaldiabetes and has to watch her diet and idk what she can eat#can't help them set uo their house because she was being a control freak about it#can't watch the baby once theyre born for her because I don't know how to do that (lol)#can't come over and clean for her once the baby is here because she already told me she doesnt want ppl doing that#so instead I just have to stare at my budget knowing that the money is almost inconsequential to them but precious to me#and just have to decide how cheap I can stretch my grocery budget to compensate#I just hate how this is the only venue I am given to like. support my friend through pregnancy. anyways.#it's not about me whatever yeah yeah but if I'm so goddamn gracious and understanding and compassionate and caring IRL I need somewhere to#come vent my dark bitter underbelly thoughts. and that is tumblr dot com.
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we are all trying to reach home and belonging because we were made for something beyond this earth but why does it feel like some people have more access to that feeling right now
#in other words: i am once again asking why i am standing on the other side of the glass#the dorm people have been visiting each other?? people have been inviting each other over to their houses over the summer????#people are extending invitations to their friends freely too????? i did not know this#i mean. why am i surprised WHY am i surprised#i HATE to be like. okay well why haven't you invited me. why have i never been invited by anyone before. it sounds like whining to my ears#i mean. i AM whining. i have been sitting in this space for the past 2 hours in the same room with these people#and i am STILL on the outside. there's only FOUR OF US IN THE ROOM#praying for strength bc i have no energy to cry again. like yes i know the lonely little girl is still alive and weeping in my heart#but i am too tired to beg for love i am too tired to perform for it i am too tired to hold my hands out and say:#may i please receive this too. I AM TOO TIRED.#tired of feeling like i'm injecting myself into conversations! of being HERE but not totally belonging! of being the odd one out!#i know they like me but do they love me! why does it always have to feel like i'm CONSTANTLY ASKING for love!#the waiting room chapter
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uhm. i got. a ✨job✨.
i apologize in advance for my inactivity in the future, but i have work monday and wednesday afternoon and all day friday. so.
sorry…
#i hate it but i need the money#its in real estate/ airbnb. the owner uses chatgpt. i have to mark beautiful old homes as “needs work” bc they dont look modern enough.#but. it is still a source of income and they give me $10 an hour and free snacks. and i can listen to music/podcasts the whole time. so.#i’ll just have to grin and bear it ig.#technically i am not so much working real estate as i am the owner’s personal assistant#so like. do computer stuff. now furnish this house. now dust the ceiling. now take inventory. now take my dog outside to use the restroom.#(she has a husky that comes to the office with her. i sure hope she takes athena [the dog] on regular walks bc i cant imagine being [1/2]#cooped up in that office all the time is too good for a husky. by the way her collar has prongs is that bad for a dog?)
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i feel like the original series was red guy centered, the first season was for yellow guy, and i am BEGGING AND PRAYING that season 2 will be more about duck!! i will probably cry if anything happens to him though lol 💀 everytime writers break a comic relief character i just OUGSHGS.. it gets me.
h well I don't think you're wrong about that! Webseries being Red Guys time to shine, S1 of the TV show being for Yellow (esp the last two episodes I think? Even thought outside of that, he does get a lot of focus/he IS the one who talks to the audience the most directly). From what I remember hearing, the pilot was pretty Duck-centered.
But I think even if he GETS his big moment in the sun, so to speak, it's NOT going to be as emotional as the other twos. On top of him just not being a very um… let's say sentimental character, he's just not the make-you-cry type! It's just not him imo!
IDK, I operate under the opinion that… in his weird little head, the most important thing that he values over everything is keeping the three of them together. Both because he thinks of them as a weird little family AND because he really doesn't have anyone else outside of the trio. We also know from the interview, and you could maybe argue from the Family episode ( Who do you love?/Anyone who loves me back., I asked every member of my family who they loved the most, and they all said me ) that being loved is something that he actually values QUITE a bit! More than you would assume on first glance! He's weirdly upfront about it haha!
In that way, I imagine that if they were to TRY to pull something to put him in the spotlight in the way you're imagining (i.e. something emotional and focusing on his issues like they did with Yellow & Red) it would either focus on his desire to be loved OR his dedication to keeping the three of them together. But I would argue they both already did that in the Family episode AND put him through the worst case-scenario in regards to those more emotional aspects of his character ( here I think the worst case scenario to him is the other two rejecting him, harshly, unambiguously and to his face, multiple times and the three of them separating ). AND THE THING IS… THAT ALREADY HAPPENED! THAT DIDN'T BREAK HIM!
He had his little pout over it in his dress and was like FINE! I DON'T NEED THEM ANYWAYS! So, I really don't think that big "character-breaking" moment is coming. If the Family ep didn't get him I honest to God don't think there's anything else the house could throw at him that could get under his skin.
#I REALLY TRULY DO THINK HES JUST GONNA KEEP BEING SILLY AND GOOFY UNTIL THE END OF TIME#just forever in the BG being funny and having the best lines#like. worst case scenario came and went and he is both so adaptable AND deranged that nothing is going to come from it ever#ALSO sorry! i think he likes being in the house lol#dude who loves repetition and stagnation and who is a complete social failure gets trapped in a time loop house with two other people?#of COURSE he loves the routine and delusionally convinces himself that the other two love him!! come ON now!!!#my dhmis postings#like im trying to think of what kind of drama can even come from his specific issues and#its like what if he figures out the other two dont think of him the same way?#HE ALREADY DID!!!#and he pushed on it and pushed on it and didnt relent until they were like PHYSICALLY seperated.#then he just convinced himself that HE made the decision to drop THEM actually.#and when that didnt work he got sad. then got over it.#again. i think he would TRY to find new friends but like. socially he is SO SO fucked lol.#hes annoying. hes loud. he NEVER stops talking. hes super upfront and DOGSHIT at communicating at the same time#hes mean. hes abrasive. he doesnt understand social cues at ALL. he has NO filter. and he refuses to work on any of that because to him#NONE of that is a problem.#like he wouldnt be able to get new friends if he TRIED. he is so completely entirely incompatible to anyone outside the group#it makes him REALLY easy to hate and i get why a lot of ppl do. HELL i get why a lot of IN UNIVERSE charas HATE him
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Theres been developments that make me think that I might not be able to keep Rascal after all but I'm going to keep trying with him.
#he umm keeps mounting Hope and him doing this makes everybody upset#They all get along until this event happens and it happens daily now#Olive comes over and beats him up about it and gets protective about Hope#And then Hope gets so upset about it that she hits Olive when she tries to console her about it and check her#And then everyone hates eachtoher and it's honestly so miserable for everyone#And THEN Rascal gets so upset that he can't just like go outside when Olive gets mad at him and he has to be separated instead#He's used to being outside and it's like. Well a cat has a problem with you and you can leave#He's in my house ... I can sure separate him but .... he's still in the house#And I just don't know what to do#I'm gonna buy strongest-formula Feliway for an outlet because the spray DOES help#I keep giving him stuff he CAN mount instead like. Stuffed animals and shit#And this kinda works#But it's kinda fucked because when he sees it's not working with Hope he tries mounting ME?!?!?!?!?#AND ITS LIKE WTF GO AWAAAAAAYYYY MAN .........
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the fact humans think its possible to have an entirely animalless/bugless zone is such hubris and such a dangerous thing to try to pursue in general. life would be so much easier if you learned to coexist with the nature around you instead of constantly try to shove it out, an ultimately fruitless endeavor.
#is destroying the environment ecosystems and habitats and killing endangered and soon-to-be-endangered-via-your-actions creatures#and plants really worth it. especially since you need those creatures and plants to survive since they're the only reason you#have any food to begin with....?#especially bugs since they pollinate the fruits and veggies you and the other animals eat and since you're probably someone who#eats some of those animals- yeah you're kinda gonna wanna prioritize the wellbeing of pollinators if you wanna keep eating meat too#to be clear: im not saying just let bugs exist in your house or something (though i do think its beneficial to keep spiders since#they kill other bugs- but i digress) what i am saying though is to act surprised or like they're out of place being inside is dumb.#they think its a cave or something. they dont know or care about the difference.#and also- ESPECIALLY dont act surprised or offended when theres a lot of bugs outside. thats kinda where they gotta be.#that's where they should be. thats a good sign if you're seeing and hearing a lot of bugs.#see it as the boon it is. it means the environment is healthy.#unless its like. mostly pest bugs. then the env probably isnt healthy.#oh also- get used to and fall in love with weird and creepy bugs bc theyre usually the ones that eat the pest bugs you hate.#but a bunch of cicadas? healthy. a bunch of bees and butterflies and weird stick bug type bugs and assassin bugs and jumping spiders#and LOTS of beetles and such? healthy.#a lot of gnats and mosquitoes and flies? unhealthy. flies aren't always a bad sign though if theres also a bunch of bees or w/e#bc flies are also a pollinator. i saw a bunch on my goldenrod when it was turning winter and it was cute imo
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