#i had to put my cat down last night
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#i had to put my cat down last night#completely unexpectedly#im very numb#my body feels so weird#but if anyone wants to help please dm me i made a meal train
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seb wants to be pet, too 😤💕 ((TYSM to @angel-fr0m-venus for asking how seb would react to clora petting all the cats around the school/hogsmeade BAHAHA. like a neglected puppy, thats how🐶))
#and thank you for the kind words as well!! im glad you like my content so much your ask was so sweet🥹💖and ty for the inspo!!#i like how yesterday i was all OH ART WILL BE SLOWER and then i immediately finish this and post it LOL.. this was supposed to be a doodle#i was getting my ass handed to me in elden ring last night and needed a break.......my spirit can only take so much#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x mc#sebastian sallow x oc#clora clemons#hogwarts legacy sebastian#choccyart#my family had to put our 18 year old black cat down this month so thats why i made clora petting a black cat🥲 MAY have teared up#also clora has a pet cat named winnie that seb knows about so i assume when he watches her pet all the cats hes like aw u miss him#but that only goes so far until he gets jelly and then HE wants rubs LOL#no not those kind of rubs#but also yes those kind of rubs🍆
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i’m so sorry if i seem a bit off or post less in the next week or so — i just found out my beloved 17 years old soulmate cat got diagnosed with bone cancer and he doesn’t have much time left. he lives in my family home with my parents still whilst i’m abroad so it’s double tough because i can’t be with him. i just need some time to calm down and make my peace with everything
#vic.txt#i’m just so damn sad he’s my most beloved boy i got him when i was fucking 7#we grew up together i cried with him i laughed with him he’s been my companion my number one boy for my entire life#i know it’s silly like yeah it’s a cat not a human being but we formed such a strong bond#when i had c0vid last year he lied with me all day all night#i love him i love him i’m so fucking mad at the universe he does not deserve this fate#and he’s so old the treatment isn’t really an option#he’s fine now he isn’t in pain but as soon as his cancer progresses he will have to be put down so he doesn’t suffer for nothing#i just want to be with him when that happens i want him to know he’s not alone and that i love him very much#txt#tw: animal death#tw: animal sickness
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people with outdoor cats be like: yes my cat came back home half dead, caught hiv, is full of parasites and sometimes has gone missing for weeks but i don't care bc at least the cat is free and not locked inside like selfish people do!!!
#i cannot fucking stress this enough PLEASE do not let your cats roam outside freely if you care about them#if they're used to going outside leash them!!!!#the amount of cats we get at the clinic who come almost dead/with horrible wounds bc they're allowed to be outside is insane#not to mention how many run over cats i see where i live#they could get attacked by other animals too#like its just not worth it#we had to put down a cat today after the owners found her almost dead with an INSANE infection bc she had ruptured her intestines#her hip was shattered too#looked like probably some asshole kicked her#and the owners were like oh we had just buried one of our other cats the other day after she got attacked by another animal#and im just standing there like ?????? and that's normal to you??????#oh but at least the cats can climb trees though 🤪#remember the dude i talked about a while ago who brought his cat in honestly the worst condition I've ever seen?#covered in poop vomit piss and fuck knows what else?#that had a colony of cats all infected with FelV bc he refuses to vax them?#yeah this woman was a family member btw#thank FUCK he didn't come today because that would've been a shitshow#all things considered at least this woman seems to be... not absolutely fucking insane? i guess?#but anyway she kept saying how it was sudden! and how the cat was perfectly fine last night!#oh my gOD that cat had maggots eating her from the inside that doesn't happen overnight#cats are tough and will hide a lot of pain but can't you just tell the truth???#you either didn't care enough to bring this poor baby earlier or you just noticed now what had happened to her
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lazy day with nibbles
#i had to put down my childhood cat last night so i took some katari and nibbles pics to cheer myself up#nibbles the littlest guy to ever#cyberpunk 2077#cp2077#nibbles the cat#screenshots#*katari
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#(( ooc. ))#negativity tw#venting tw#sorry for bad vibes on the dash today again#will delete this in a sec just lemme vent#so. i bought all the food for thanksgiving....#i cooked it all. his only contribution was rinsing half of the potatoes. peeling 2 carrots. and opening a couple cans for me#even the turkey that was supposed to be his to handle i ended up doing#bc he severely undercooked it so i had to step in to fix that and make sure it cooked properly#and then he said 'okay. you did all the cooking. i'll clean up.'#................... nope. guess who handled that too#while he was just sitting at the table after he was done#i'm the one that put all the food away. wiped down everything. filled the dishwasher#and got it going. gathered up all the other dishes and put them by the sink to wash#so to recap. i bought all the food. made all the food. and cleaned up after the entire meal#if i sound bitter its because i am#when i pointed out that i was having to clean up everything when he said he would his response was just 'sorry i'm such a useless hubby'#i mean yeah kinda#couple all this with the fact that i'm also the one who was up until midnight last night. on my bday. and on my period and exhausted#doing a ton of housework that he was supposed to handle. including cat litter which flares up my asthma when i do it#but i didn't have a choice. just masked up and did it myself bc its not fair to the fluffy bbys if i just let it slide and wait#for him to do it. bc that might be a few days.#sorry to bitch on the dash like this but just. the last couple days especially have been disappointing#between him flubbing my big 30 bday yesterday and now this today......... i'm really over it#gonna be lurking here and pretending i'm not pissed off
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Cold and tired and hungry and the world is hateful and I do not wish to do anything but. Babygirl is draped across my shoulders like a scarf purring aggressively in my ear and I love her very much
#she RAN to me when I got up earlier#sometimes I think there is no point to me being alive at all. but my cats miss me when I work too much and I love them dearly and maybe that#is the point.#ash.txt#you don't get it she hates bare skin. HATES it. she will not sit on my lap if I am not wearing trousers. but there was ZERO hesitation she#ran straight over to me and jumped up onto my bare thighs and didn't even wait for me to put a blanket down for her to stand on#she loves me so much. she loves me SO much. she was so sad every night I had to go to work last week.
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Well today is awful
#we had to put our cat down last night.#we were there til 1:30am#i have never felt worse in my life#and i cannot imagine what my roommate is going thru#i didn't sleep til after 3am and woke up a little after 6 because my body hates me#and on top of that im now stressing and panicking about being a bother to my friend#and i know i should just worry about me today probably but i cant hlep it#and something seems off and im just going to keep panicking about it til i figure out why idk
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there is something inherently tragic yet freeing about knowing that, even though you didn't get what you needed when you were younger, it's still possible to build that life for yourself as an adult.
you're not trapped or destined for loneliness. you can always build. again and again and again, as many times as you need to. the love and the freedom and the kindness and the connection, it's all waiting for you. you'll get there.
#was spiraling pretty bad this weekend#its been a year and a half since my brother died#my mom is going through another psychotic episode unfortunately and isnt really all there#my dad is trying but hes also not supportive of me being trans so theres some contention there#my car keeps breaking down#my cat got out of my apartment last night and scared me half to death; thankfully rescued her from the street before she got too far#a horse died really traumatically two weeks ago at the ranch (literally bled out all over me)#and all of these things put together meant that i felt so fucking powerless and hopeless.#i felt like life had given me a bad hand#and i was just suffering for no reason#BUT#i realized at some point that there *are* things i have control over#like being kind to myself and others#being courageous despite the fears#feeding and washing myself and tending to my plants#playing games and completing pretty puzzles and reading good books#finding sea glass at the beach#a new favorite song#getting a big ol bear hug from my roommate#everything is hard but there is good. there is still good and its worth finding and building#trying to remind myself of this every day#text
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i think in the new place im going to get a little night light that im going to wall-mount special on an outlet cause these night terrors are getting pretty fucking severe and constant
#i also need like an overhead calm-down kit for the bedroom. not quite sure what to put in there#i'd get sprays but a lot of those aren't cat friendly and i need to look into something thats like soothing for people for bedtime-#but not overwhelming or dangerous for animal#im going to have to take a large fucking hiatus from the logging my life events document because it turns out#when you log important life events in as much detail as you can possibly find you start remembering more#which causes the demons to appear in your room again. great.#had to call out of work today because of it. could not sleep for the life of me last night
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Going to the vet today :')👍 bc I'm going to be out of town tomorrow & I don't want to leave this problem hanging w/o supervision
#speculation nation#cassy is not feeling better. so to the animal hospital i go.#specifically it's smth last night that kinda freaked me out#passed stool lying down & made a noise of pain. Really freaked me out.#i dont. deal well. when a cat makes noises like that.#so yea the post i made last night is about this#i get that bone deep dread & panic from when my last cat suddenly got sick & had to be put down#bone deep Terror in a way. but at least Cassy's still able to walk around & eat a little bit#so it's not the same. it's Not the same.#still not pleasant to deal with though!#i ended up sleeping on the couch last night so i could hold him. then he left me after a few hours & i just kept sleeping there lol#not the most comfortable sleep. but im worried about him.#well. we'll see what the vet says i guess.#animal death ment/#animal illness ment/#negative/
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nightmare every night for three days in a row will we make it four for four and also what planet can I blame it on (aside from earth)
#first one. I normally have environmental disasters as stress dreams but it’s always bushfires cuz that’s the most real n relevant to me yea?#PLOT TWIST TJIS ONE WAS A CYCLONE#plus other things going on#second one my darling baby my absolute soul cat who had to be put down the day before my birthday and I miss her every single day?#yea she was dying again but it was way worser horrible way and I couldn’t do jack shit for her ! and it wasn’t quick and easy either !#third one last night involved a fucking car accident that killed two random ppl idek where my brain conjured them up from but it was !#horrifying ! one guy wasn’t even entirely dead either it was fucked up!#it’s now nearly 1am and I don’t wanna sleep again for obvious reasons dkfjfk#anyway I need a new phone case so if anyone has suggestions for a !!! CUTE!!!! protective case for an iphone se. pls lemme know#wish me luck lads#mercury.txt
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#we’ve had to put both our cat and one of the dogs down in the past two weeks.#they were both old but my heart hurts. especially because i couldn’t make it home to cuddle them one last time#the house is gonna feel so empty next time i’m home#and the puppy is gonna be upset :(#i just. god.#pet death /#i’m so used to having three pets to see when i go home and having the cat to cuddle with at night because he loved coming in my room to slee#and hanging out with the dog and now it will just be the puppy
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SIZE ~ (true form) sukuna x reader ౨ৎ .⋆。⊹ 18+
thinking about kuna with a size kink....... is not good for my mental health omg. sukuna has been stalking you for what seem like years. Watching you when you walk to class, going out with your friends, heading to work,,, and who you fuck yourself late at night. You've always had a feeling as if you were being watched for the last couple years. An unknown darkness that follows you around. It should have scared you away,,,, but you couldn't help but give into your sinful desires... especially on the night that this darkness comes to pay you a little visit.
word count: 7600 sukuna x reader smut. size kink,,, obviously. dumbification, fingering, slapping, overstimulation, heavy smut, corruption kink, stalking, voyeurism, breeding, monster fucking, heavy CNC. Double penetration. Perv! Monster! Stalker! Sukuna x Innocent! reader (I have a problem). True form sukuna smut (yes, we get a double dicker sandwich).
Sukuna always knew that he had a size kink, he just never acknowledged the fact until he met you. You were so small compared to him, it was like you were just a measly doll, a puppet. So pretty, so small, and so, so very innocent. He almost felt guilty for the things he fantasizes about doing to you. almost.
He additionally almost felt a little guilty for how many times he'd watched you masturbate through your window late into the night. The sounds you make while touching your pretty pussy were the only thing that calmed him after a long and stressful evening. He had been doing this for a while. Watching you, that is. He liked watching you get dressed for the day, guessing what makeup style you were planning on doing, the little pop you did with your lips right after you applied your lip gloss. It should be disgusting how many times he's rubbed one out to the sight of you popping those pretty pink, full glossy lips. but he didn't care nor did he feel a tinge of disgust towards himself.
He enjoyed all the times he's watched you walk to and from your little cafe job down the street. How your routine consisted of grabbing a coffee at a different spot despite being able to make yourself a free one at your place of work. How you would play with and feed your cats before heading out for the day.
He also enjoyed the days where you went out with your friends to the mall to shop, or to a restaurant for girls night. He especially liked it when you and your girls went out for dinner. All the cute and godawful tiny dresses you found yourself wearing always just about make him lose his cool. The only thing he hated about girls night out was the fact that you knew you were sexy, meaning men swarmed around you like vultures, eyeing you like a piece of meat. It made him want to bend you over the nearest table and fuck you right in front of everyone.
Sukuna owned you, he just hasn't put the collar on you yet.
Tonight was one of those nights where you went out with your girlfriends. Your hair was done up all pretty and your makeup took you hours to perfect, but it was all worth it for the evil, thigh clasping presence you felt in the dark corner of the club you were in. Your glossy lips were a tint of pink and your cheeks matched the deep red of the short dress you were wearing. The familiar dark energy seemed to be radiating all around you, more than normal.
He knew you couldn't see him, but sukuna stood at that corner of the room, hidden away from all the humans, his eyes locked onto one. Sweat glistened on the top of your breasts, and your lips seemed more plump than normal. But the thing that was driving him crazy was the fact that one man couldn't seem to leave you alone. he kept coming up to you in desprate search of starting a conversation, shamelessly eyeballing your prominent curves and licking his lips. sukuna wanted to explode his head right then and there for trying to seduce his woman. And what pissed him off even more was the fact that you were actually playing into it.
You kept making small touches to the mans arm whenever he said something "funny" and you bit your lip whenever he complimented you. But sukuna knew that your laugh wasn't genuine and your smile was a fake. He knew the real you. Of course he did. He'd been stalking you for months, if not years. he made his claim a while ago, and he wasn't gonna let some scrawny low life steal his property with a couple sad jokes.
Your smile faltered just a hair when you felt the dark presence leave the club. It was almost like a warm blanket had been ripped off of you. Your eyes seemed to glaze over, which led the random man to ask if you were okay.
"Yeah, I'm fine, I just feel sick for some reason" your response was an obvious lie, but apparently good enough for the man to believe.
"oh, are you alright, would you like a ride back to yours?" He asks, and to be completely honest, kinda made you cringe. Of course you didn't want a ride because the only reason you were talking to him was to make whatever was watching you jealous.
Sukuna found interest in you because of your innocence. But oh was he in for a surprise. You knew something had been following you, you knew it had been watching you whenever you touched yourself late at night. You've felt it since the very beginning.
its like you had your own curse.
You should have told somebody when the red flags started popping up out of nowhere; they started out small, ranging from your couch pillows being moved around, then progressed into things like your favorite pair of panties going missing, then to things that freaked you out, like waking up to your bedroom window being open in the morning even though you know for a fact that you had closed and locked it. You should have moved apartments. You should have done something when this started happening.
But you didn't. And it made you sick. Getting off on the fact that you knew you were being stalked by whatever was hunting you.
And the fact that you were upset that the mysterious darkness had left proves just how disgusting you actually are.
"guys, I think im gonna call a cab, I just got hit with a wave of sickness and I really just wanna go home and sleep" you told your friends after shooing off the man you had no interest in.
"omg girl are you okay? of course go home and rest im so sorry!" one of your friends said right after taking her 4th shot.
"yeah im fine, just not really feeling it"
"text me when you get home!"
Staring at the dark yet lively city lights flashing by you, you kept thinking about the little stalker you seem to have. You thought it was weird how turned on you got just from an energy, from a presence. You've never felt so.. needed. so, praised ?
No man, or woman. Has ever given you so much confidence, if that's the right word. And because of that, you've never felt another human beings intimate touch. You only want its touch. Whatever it is.
Sukuna knows what he does to you. He could basically see it radiating off of you. How much confidence you gained and how well you hold yourself. And he'd never been happier to be the one gifting you that grace. That's actually the main thing that peaked his interest about you. The way you held yourself throughout life. Nothing could stop you from getting what you want, and he admired that. It made him question himself at first, being so interested about a human being. It made him debate on keeping you alive. How dare a human make him question himself.
But that passed quickly the first time he'd seen your fingers fuck your pussy. it was delicious. he had to restrain himself from shattering your balcony door and fucking you stupid.
You felt it leaking through the cracks of your front door. It felt different than all the other times its followed you around and watched you throughout your life. It was stronger, and it turned you on so, so much more than normal.
You stood outside your apartment door debating on going inside. Your face was burning and your pussy was throbbing.
It felt like you were going absolutely insane, and it pissed you off not knowing what was making you into such a pathetic mess. With a deep breath, you opened your door only to be met with darkness aside from a few street lights illuminating your living room in a dull yellow.
You set your stuff on the couch before walking into your room, slinging your door open, you didn't even have to turn the light on to know that whatever it was, had decided to perch itself in your bed.
For the first time in years, you actually felt scared of whatever it was. Your whole demeanor changed in an instant, and it made sukuna chuckle.
That chuckle vibrated throughout your skull, straight down your core.
Wanting to fold in on yourself out of fear, but too turned on to do so; you walked in, closing the door behind you. Sukuna's eyes never leaving your much smaller frame.
Trying to hide the fact that almost your entire being is screaming at you to run away from the thing in front of you, you stand your ground.
"What are you?" You ask the figure you have yet to fully lay eyes on. All you're able to make out is a monster-like figure with four arms, two behind its head using them as a cushion against your headboard, and the other two resting on its thighs. Its legs are long and big, both of them spread apart, inviting you in, in the most almost taunting way imaginable. Its face is completely hidden in the dark, restricting you from seeing the cocky, shit eating grin plastered on its face.
"What a weird first question to ask, y/n."
Its voice sent chills down your spine, creating an even stronger pulse in your heart, and your clit. You involuntarily suck in a breath at the sound of its voice. Deep, husky and masculine. It's nothing like you've ever heard before, and it makes your skin crawl in excitement and fear.
He chuckles again at the gasp you let out. You stay in your spot, making sure to keep a safe distance away from him.
"Answer my question." The words left your throat as more of a command than anything else. Your eyes never leave his frame, even as he removes his arms behind his head and lean forward, crossing them across his chest. His eyes never leave your body either, drinking in the sight of your skimpy dress.
All he wants to do is burn it off of you and make you scream his name as you cream all over his cock, but that'll take a minute to happen, so he answers you instead.
"King of curses, my dear." His voice sending another wave of shivers coursing through your body. He stands, and your entire body starts screaming at you to run away. but despite that, you hold your ground, challenging the being in front of you.
He's at least over 7 feet tall, one set of arms still crossed over his chest, the other finds their way to rest on his hips.
"The name is Sukuna." You just about drop to your knees. not only is his voice is unbearable, but you've heard about him before. You never believed in ghosts, curses, spiritual beings, anything of the sort and you've never believed any of your friends or family members when they told you legends about the man standing before you, yet here you are. About to be torn apart by the king they've warned you about for so many years.
"Guess you've heard about me, hm?" You can't get your damn mouth to move or your throat to make any noise. Your eyes are as wide as planets and all you can do is take a shaky step back, mimicking his opposite step forward and towards you.
"Why- why are you here?" voice is shaking as you speak, your breathing is jagged, which is prominent in your stutter. Just as sukuna takes another step forward, his features are illuminated in the moonlight shining through your bedroom windows curtains. He's absolutely breathtaking, and not many people would say that.
I guess I really am fucked up huh
"oh y/n, don't play dumb now, doll." His grin never leaves his face and your eyes meet with his. He's scary in the best way possible, and it's making you want to wipe off that dumb grin by sitting on it.
"You're the one whose..." You take a moment to think, which is extremely hard when this monster starts stalking towards you ever so slowly, both sets of arms coming down to dangle by his sides. He tilts his head to the side and begins to hunch his back and bend over to get a closer look at you. The distance is closing in on the two of you, making you unintentionally walk backwards and into a wall.
The sudden feeling of the cold wall on your back makes you yelp in surprise, but you never look away. He hums at you, signaling you to finish your sentence.
"You're the one whose been watching me for so long.." You say under your breath. Chewing the skin on the bottom of your lip. Your hands clench into fists as he keeps getting closer and closer.
"don't act like you didn't enjoy my little haunting game, love. you do remember touching yourself just to the thought of me, right y/n?" His smug smile could be heard just by the tone of his voice. Your breathing deepens and he's stopped right in front of you, face to face with the thing that's been taking over your entire life for the past couple years. Your back would be disappearing into the wall if it weren't made out of sheetrock. He stands up fully and all you can do is stare straight ahead, looking directly in the center of his entire body. He's fucking huge. Letting out a shriveled breath, you close your eyes.
"Look at me, y/n."
You refuse to open your eyes, or even move in the slightest.
He gives you 15 seconds before one of his hands grips the base of your jaw and forces your face upwards to look at him, nails digging into the flesh of your rosy cheeks.
"I said, look at me." With a fearful yelp at the sudden contact, you force your eyes open and are met with the most sinful red eyes you could ever see in this lifetime.
"Good girl." He snickers at the petrified look that paints your face. Even though you look so scared, your eyes are clouded with so much lust. Sukuna can basically smell the arousal pooling in your panties and it's driving him up the wall. Without a word, he pins you in place, making no room for escape by pressing his one of his forearms against the wall above your head, another one finds its way trailing up your thigh.
You let out a desprate sigh at the contact of his fingers. He traces up the skin of your inner thigh, leaving goosebumps to trail behind until he's met with the flimsy fabric of your underwear and it takes him less than a fraction of a second to feel just how soaked you really are.
"You're disgusting." His voice somehow got an octave deeper, but who are you to complain? You whine at his words, following a louder whine as he starts to trace the slit of your pussy through your underwear. Sukuna's hand locks your head in place as you look up into his eyes as he pushes your underwear to the side and pinches your clit, his fingernails creating a painfully pleasurable feeling.
With a loud yelp, your hips buck forward. With his final free arm, he uses his hand to push your hips back against the wall, keeping you in one place.
"Stay still." He commands. His hand on your hip is locking you in place, so you have no option than to obey. His finger traces patterns on your clit and moans dance off your tongue as a result. His fingers pick up the pace and are now harshly massaging at your center.
"a-ah, slow ple-" Without stopping his brutal pace, sukuna lets go of your face and just before it can fall forward, he grips a handful of your hair and yanks it backwards roughly. your eyes to lock with his once more. A scream at the sudden pain erupts from the back of your throat.
"Don't tell me what to do, i'll use you how I please." Sukuna pulls his fingers away from your clit only to land a harsh slap on the bundle of nerves, making you yelp loudly and your body jolt in surprise. He slaps it a couple more times before forcing two of his fingers into your wet pussy.
Sukuna's fingers slide in with ease thanks to his assult on your clit. He was standing at such a close proximity to your body that when your back archesoff the wall, your stomach and chest meet his front. Just as your body meets his, he decides to let go of your hair, making your head fall forward and onto his center. Your hands instinctually reach up and wrap around his body, using him as leverage to keep yourself from falling. Your nails dig into his back as his fingers work wonders deep inside of you, all you can do is bury your head into him to suppress your noises.
His fingers pump in and out of your pussy, curling and twisting at all the right angles, fingering your core as if he's trying to tear you apart from the inside out. Wet sounds come from just below you, but neither of you seem to hear them because they're drowned out by your loud moans and whimpers of pleasure. Sukuna's eyes never leave your body as you come undone.
His now free hand that was once in your hair decides to hook under your thigh, picking it up and letting it dangle, helping get a better angle to fuck you with his fingers. Because of this newfound angle, your back and head hit the wall behind you once more, but your arms don't leave his body.
"Look at you, such a pretty girl. So fuckin' small I could break you so, so easily." Your nails scratch at his back like there is no tomorrow and all you can do as a response is whimper.
"su- kuna" Your hiccuped plea of his name is enough to know you're about to cum all over his fingers, but he wont let that happen just yet.
"say it, y/n" Sukuna says, his voice solid. You look up, tears welled in your eyes as you look into his and your voice breaks.
"Please can I cum, please k-una please please please" Your cheeks are a deep shade of red and your mouth is slightly ajar and oh does sukuna wanna fill up your pretty mouth and ruin that pretty pink lipgloss that stain your full lips.
Without another word, his smirk deepens and his chuckle vibrates inside your skull. He takes his fingers out of you, your juices now running down your thighs and you're pretty sure your panties are completely ruined thanks to the demon above you. Your eyes widen while you plea him to continue with a hushed whimper.
"Hush, little one" is all he says before one set of arms is gripping your thighs and hauling you into the air. Your legs wrap around his torso on instinct and your throat lets out a surprised squeal at his actions. Your hands come up and one of them grips his shoulder, the other rests in his hair. You're now face to face with sukuna and his eyes look deeply into yours. one of his other free hand's is tangled in your hair within a fraction of a second and is pulling you in to kiss him with so much force, it almost gives you whiplash.
Your tongue tangles with his and you let out another squeal of surprise right into his mouth when your back hits the cushioning of your bed. Sukuna is now on top of you, his torso flat against your heat. The hand that was once tangled in your hair is now trailing its way to your neck. Sukuna breaks the kiss and you go to lean forward in protest, but his huge hand wrapped around your neck stops you. Another hand rests on the headboard above you, and the two that were holding you up now rest at the top of your dress.
With brute force and in the blink of an eye, your once beautiful red dress and strapless braw are now being ripped off of you, tiny flames ignite from the freshly ripped seam for a just a fraction of a second. You gasp at the sudden action and Sukuna's glowing red eyes never falter to look at the reaction on your face. He laughs once more at just how jumpy you are. the cold air hits your skin, causing your nipples to grow hard and goosebumps form on your smooth skin. Sukuna grabs the dress and bra out from under you and throw the articles of clothing across the room to be forgotten, all while looking right at you. Once the dress is out of sight, you look up at him, your eyes half lidded with lust that are basically begging him to use you.
Sukuna smiles at how innocent, yet already fucked out you look and decides to lean down toward your breasts, taking one of your nipples and fondiling it inside of his warm mouth. His tongue laps at you and your hands fly to his hair, pulling it out of pleasure. His two free hands now rest at your thighs, slowly pulling them apart, to which you happily obliged. His mouth moves from your nipple and starts to suck at the skin of your breasts. His mouth trails from your chest, down to your stomach and abdomen, leaving deep purple marks and bites that will most likely be staying for days, if not weeks. Your whimpers are like music to Sukuna's ears which only make him want to make you scream his name.
The hand that rested on the headboard is now grabbing your hands from his hair and forcing them down onto the mattress above you and the set of hands that were on your thighs are on your hips. Your eyes dont leave his, even as he rips your panties and throws them in the same direction he did your other clothes, making you bare yourself completely to him.
His hands part your thighs once more and pins them down, holding you in place.
"So cute, so tiny. 'could just ruin you hm?" he speaks as he lowers his head down to your heat, his breath fanning your dripping pussy. Your breathing is even more uneven than before as it's mixed with your hushed moans. Without taking his eyes off yours, he sticks out his tongue and licks a stripe up your cunt, causing your jaw to slack open in the perfect "oh" shape as your whine rings inside sukuna's skull. He licks up your cunt a couple more times before it initially lands on your clit, then he buries his head into your thighs and nips at you like a dog in heat.
His mouth sucks, bites and laps at your clit, and you try with all your strength to buck your hips up, but to no avail, the hands on your thighs pin you in place as your arms are basically unuseful. All you can do is throw your head back in pleasure as this creature devoures you. His grip on your throat tightens a little more and suddenly it's more difficult to breathe, but you dont even care.
Sukuna's saliva mixes in with your fluids that run down your thighs and asscheeks, wetting the bed under you. His long tongue fucks itself inside your pussy and against your walls as his teeth drag across your clit. Sukuna doesn't look away from you, not for a second. He wants to see every twist on your face and flex of your abs as he eats you out, he's desperately and intensively observing you, as if you were the most beautiful, treasurable piece of art he's ever layed eyes on. His tongue is rough as he creates a rhythm of fucking your insides, and sucking your bundle of nerves.
Your arms tug at the restraint of his hands holding your wrists. He's so much stronger than you, yet that fact alone turns you on so much more. Your moans and hushed screams fill the room as small beads of sweat gather on your hairline. Your body twitches under sukuna's control and your clit is throbbing for release as he toys with you.
You're so close to finishing and sukuna can tell so easily. Your moans grow into louder screams and your back arches off the bed. His grip on your throat tightens, cutting off all supply of air and your eyes are thrown open as you choke and cough, trying to get any oxygen possible.
Sukuna laughs into your pussy, which vibrates through your whole body. Your eyes look down into his, desperately trying to tell him to let you cum, or breathe. Whichever one he will let you do. Your silent plea only turns him on even more and your vision is starting to blacken and your head begins to feel light.
"Fuck, you're so adorable when you're beggin' for your life" He says as he sits up and hovers over you, refusing to let you finish. The hand on your throat disappears and you cough and gasp for air, but just as you suck in a deep breath, its knocked out of you by a harsh slap to your face and all you can do is gasp in pain at the sudden stinging on your cheek. He grips your face directly after with the hand he had previously slapped you with and forces you to look down at your pussy.
One of the hands on your thighs moves up to your cunt and plunges inside you. Two of Sukuna's fingers thrust inside your cunt at lightning speed and curl up into your center, hitting that spot you need him most. You choke out a scream and your hips grind into his palm.
"Look at the mess you're making y/n. Such a nasty little girl you are." He says as he looks at your pretty face contorting from the overstimulation he brings upon you.
Sukuna's fingers are relentless as they move fast inside of you. Not even a couple seconds later, you're cumming all over his hand and arm, squirting your fluids all over him as well as your bed sheets. You come undone with a scream.
"K-kuna oh my god!" You're being so loud, you could almost bet the neighbors across the street could hear. Neither of you cared though, all you cared about was how you were about to be torn in half.
Your eyes are watery again and you're still desperately trying to gather air in your lungs. Sukuna's hands let go of your wrists and face, but right after, you hear an article of clothing rip. You sit up slightly in wonder, but your mouth instantly hangs open at the sight of two handsomely large cocks sprung up, hitting just above Sukuna's belly button. Your mouth instantly dried at the sight.
Speaking of sights, Sukuna thought you were a beautiful one. Your hair was a shriveled mess and your face was the most gorgeous shade of red. You looked so fucked out, yet so ready to take anything he gives you like the obedient whore you are. You had a look of fear and interest plastered on your face. Sukuna was never one for love or anything of the sort, but the moment he layed his eyes on you those couple years ago, he knew he was fucked. You were just so different than most of the humans he had ever made contact with. You didn't care about the difference between "good and bad" and you always took what you wanted without second thought, even if it took you a while to grasp. You were always ready for whatever was thrown at you and were always in control of everything around you.
That's why he decided to stick around. Since the beginning, he's wanted to corrupt your world and fuck up your flow of control. He was arrogant and cocky. You just needed someone, or something, to step in and take control over you. And sukuna was never going to let anybody else besides him take control over his woman.
Though he would never admit it out loud, you were breathtaking. You're also the only reason he hasn't burned this world to the ground,,,, completely.
"Think you can take em'?" Sukuna's voice never fails to make a shiver run up your spine. You don't answer him, all you do is stare into his eyes, a silent plea to just have him use you however he pleases. He takes your lack of an answer and laughs quietly under his breath. He brings one of his hands to his face, and smiles into his palm.
"you're gonna be the death of me."
His body slowly stalks towards you, crawling onto the bed, trapping your body between his and the headboard. Your thighs rub together in desprate search of friction. You can't take it any longer, you need him inside you. You need every part of this being in any way you can have him.
"I don't care if you think you can take my cocks' or not, I'll force you to take em' how bout that, yeah?" His head tilts as he speaks and one of his hands grips your leg and pulls your body down farther onto the bed, causing you to lay down underneath his much larger body.
"You're so- so big kuna.." Your voice is uncontrolled and small. Unlike earlier where your screams and moans were ear piercing and just so delicious. Your eyes look up into his, your hands sneak up to wrap around one set of his arms, squeezing his biceps as you chew on the skin of the inside of your cheek.
Sukuna groans at your words. He really was huge, trapping your body underneath his. One of his hands grips the headboard, another comes down to grip the side of your face. His thumb traces your bottom lip, smearing your lipgloss.
Just as you open your mouth, his thumb presses down on your tongue as you suck in his finger. One of your hands makes its way down his body, gripping one of his huge cocks in your small hand. Despite the size difference, Sukuna still hisses in response. You pump his hard dick a couple times, looking directly into his eyes as you suck on his thumb. With painful force, sukuna grips your wrists and suddenly, both your hands above your head once more.
With one hand gripping the headboard, one holding your wrists in place, another moves from your mouth to grip one of his dicks while the final hand holds himself up, hovering right above you. You whine at the lack of control you have, grinding your hips upwards as a sign to let you go, but all sukuna does is laugh at your attempts of escape.
"Stop moving, slut." He pushes one of his dicks at your pussys entrance, but you don't listen to him, you grind your hips upwards once more and Sukuna doesn't seem to like that very much.
"Told you to stop movin' brat" and without warning, or any lube (as if you needed any) he pushes one of his cocks into your pussy with full force. It has you automatically screaming at the stretch. It's painful and you're pretty sure you're bleeding.
Sukuna bottoms out inside of you and stills, the outline of his dick prominant through your stomach, it drives him insane.
Sukuna uses his now free hand and pushes down on the outline of his cock through your tummy and chuckles.
"Fuck you're so small y/n, look at your tummy baby" You obey him and look down, seeing the outline of his huge dick bulging in your abdomen. A scared moan leaves your lips as you take in the sight. It literally looks like he could split you in half at any given moment. Sukuna pulls his dick out, a painful sensation radiates through your vagina as he does. The bulge in your tummy disappears and sukuna's face falters into one of disappointment.
"fuck, you're bleedin' y/n! " sukuna says to you, and just as you're about to look for yourself, he thrusts his dick back inside you, filling you back up again. He bottoms out inside you and a strangled moan that sounds more like a cough forces its way out of your throat.
"full- im so full, too full please-" Sukuna's face turns into one of disappointment again at your words as he says
"that's too bad, I wasn't even close to being finished with stuffin' you doll." He mocks you, and just as he finishes talking, you feel his second cock at the entrance of your ass, which causes you to shoot your head up.
"No, no please dont" you beg him, despite your words not being how you really feel, you beg him not to anyways. sukuna's face is still one that mocks you, pretending as if he feels bad for splitting you open. He pushes his tip into your ass so slowly it almost makes this situation better. The stretch is unbearable, especially with how tight you are with another cock spreading you open and filling you already.
Sukuna's entire tip is stuffed inside, waiting for you to adjust to his length.
"Look at you, taking me so well. Such a good little girl aren't you?" His voice is taunting you. Your arms feel weak from how much you've been struggling to break free, so all you can do I lay there and adjust to his cocks with hushed moans.
Sukuna starts moving his cock deeper inside you slowly, but not slow enough.
"Kuna please no, it's too much I can't take it" Your head shakes from side to side as painful tears fall from your eyes and down your cheeks. Sukuna pouts at this and leans down and uses his tongue to lick the tears away.
"you can take it, you're already doing such a good job for me." This reassurance helps you a little more, and with every inch growing deeper inside you, you find it hard to breathe, and sukuna notices.
He leans down and whispers deeply into your ear
"breathe my dear."
you listen to him and take deep breaths. In one particular deep breath, sukuna takes it upon himself to completely push the other half of his cock into you, getting it done in one swift motion just as you breathe out.
His actions cause you to scream in pain,,, and in pleasure. More tears fall from your eyes. Sukuna doesn't even give you time to adjust this go around, he just can't wait any longer.
"fuck, takin' my cocks' so well, you're so fuckin' tight, couldn't help myself" Sukuna says into your ear.
Your ass feels so tight as he thrusts in and out of both your stretched holes. the pain subsides into pleasure after a couple strokes and your painful hisses turn into sickening moans.
The sound of skin slapping echos off the walls of your dark room, the only light source being the moonlight shining through your window. Your pussy feels like it's going to burst every time sukuna's dicks thrust back inside you.
Sukuna's grip on your bed frame is so tight, the wood crumbles in his hand
"fuck" He curses under his breath
He needs to grip onto something, anything, so he decided to harshly grip the sheets that lay right next to your head. He looks from your face, down to your pussy where he sees his cocks move in and out of you, stretching you so beautifully.
When he looks back up at you, your teary, half lidded eyes lock onto his. You dont break eye contact, even as you moan out his name like a chant that dances off your tongue straight into his ears. And he loves it.
Your walls squeeze his dick's like you're trying to milk him dry. He's even surprised both of them fit inside you.... as if he didn't literally force them to fit.
"Please please let me touch you, just wan' touch please kuna' please" you moan out, begging him to let go of your arms. Much to his objection, he lets you go.
Your arms instantly wrap around his back, nails digging into his skin as you pull your bodies closer together. Your boobs press up against his broad chest as your sweat rubs into his skin.
Two of his arms hold his body up on his forearms above your head now, the other is pinning your stomach to the bed, the feeling of his dick entering and exiting your pussy being felt through your tummy.
his last free hand finds its way to the small of your back, his arm wrapping around your body and pressing you somehow closer against his. Your face is directly into his chest as you moan and scream out his name as his thrusts become wicked and fast, his hips snapping against yours. Your legs spread out for him to take advantage of you.
Sukuna looks down at you buried into his chest, his body hot and sweaty. Your nails scratching daggers into his back, you're pretty sure you can feel blood under your fingernails.
With each thrust inside you, your moans are choked and jagged and it's hard to breathe. The coil in your tummy is about to burst and you feel like you could explode from just how full you really were. Everything was too much, yet so perfect. Sukuna felt as if he was going to burst too, everything was so hot and wet, it was only driving him even more insane.
Your screams grew louder with each stroke of his cocks, signaling to sukuna that you were close.
"want me to come inside you? full you up and breed you like a dumb fuckin whore, turn you into a mommy?" He asks you, and all you can do is shake your head.
"you're gonna take my cum weather you want to or not, understand? Fill you up so nice nd' warm" He bares his teeth as you scream his name..
"no, no please dont I can't handle it, too full please k-una!" He doesn't like this answer, and it causes him to groan through his teeth. With a set of his arms, he grips your waist harshly, and with the other, he's stabilizing himself on the bed above you and sits up slightly.
"I dont care what you want, you're gonna take whatever I give you." he says before pulling his cocks out and flipping you onto your tummy. Your yelp of surprise is cut short as your hands grip at the sheets above you, trying to pull your body up and away from the monster.
"ah ah ah, dont run away from me, im nowhere close to being done with you." Sukuna stands up at the edge of the bed, his feet on the floor. He grabs your ankles and pulls you to the edge where he stands. He lets go of your ankles and roughly grips your hips, pulling you up and slightly into the air. He forces your knees down into the mattress, your ass up and your face in your sheets. His hands remain on your hips as another one of his hands finds a handful of your hair, gripping and pulling your head upwards and next to his chest, forcing you into a painful arch.
Sukuna bends over so his face is next to your ear. His long tongue licks your neck, and up to the lobe of your ear just before he bites it, your moan in exchange.
"now shut up and let me ruin you" is all he says before forcing your face down into your sheets, one of his hands pressing your head down into the mattress.
Sukuna thrusts his cocks into your holes once more, resulting in a muffled scream coming out of your mouth, but he doesn't move. his hips flush against your ass. Sukuna lifts one hand from your hips and lands a harsh smack on your ass, leaving your skin red. Your walls tighten around his cocks.
so he does it again
and again
and again
over and over and over until you're creaming all over his cock and squirting all over your bed once more with more muffled screams.
"pathetic. squirting all over my cock with just a few slaps to your ass. how disgusting could you possibly get?" He mocks you again, landing one more painful slap to your ass as your liquids drip down your thighs and onto the mattress below you. He grabs the flesh of your ass with both of his hands and slowly pulls his dicks out of you, the empty felling in your tummy has you begging for him to fill you back up.
sukuna's face twists into one of interest as he hears your whines of protest.
"oh? what a little slut I have on my hands. and here I thought you truly didn't want me to tear you apart" he says as he thrusts his cocks deep back inside you, hitting your sweet spot that has you squealing ever so loudly. Your hands above your head painfully grip the sheets, your nails digging into your palms drawing blood. His thrusts are endless and with each one, he grows deeper inside of you. He uses one of his hands and rakes his nails down your back, scratching at your skin. It was a painfully blissful feeling that had your walls squeezing his cocks so tight, it causes sukuna to curse under his breath.
With a chuckle, he says
"you're so fukin' tight, im gonna fill you up so full, so swollen with my baby, you'll forever be marked as mine, you'd like that huh?" of course sukuna was lying, he would never ever want to reproduce, but the way you're milking his cocks is making him reconsider his entire opinion on that subject.
His thrusts grow faster and stronger, your pussy and ass flutter around his dicks so prettily, he can see it whenever he looks at your holes. You moan his name over and over again, like it's the only thing you know how to say.
The knot in your abdomen kept getting tighter and tighter every time he hit your sweet spot, you were so close to finishing and all you could do is yearn for sukuna to carry you to the finish line. So that's exactly what he did.
The hand holding your head down into the mattress disappeared, so you turned your head to the side, resting your cheek against the mattress, your eyes find his and oh fuck
oh good god
sukuna lost it
he threw his head back with a loud moan and tightened his grip on your hips so intensely he felt your skin break from under him, his nails digging into your flesh as blood ran down your legs, pooling on the sheets, staining his fingertips.
You had a puddle of drool where your face lays. your lips were bleeding from biting down on them so roughly, and your eyes. oh fuck your eyes were so perfect. it was as if sukuna could read a whole book just by looking into your eyes.
Just as he was about to finish, you came all over him once more, wetting the bed, soaking it really. Your walls fluttered all around him like the butterflies in your stomach. as you came, sukuna shot warm ropes of cum straight into your ass and tummy, so full it was leaking out of both your holes. but it wasn't enough.
It wasn't enough for sukuna.
In the middle of both your orgasms, he resumed his thrusts, but your body gave out and you collapsed on the mattress, your stomach hitting the wet bedding.
your body couldn't move, you became putty in his hands and you had no complaints.
sukuna cursed as he crawled over you, his dicks never leaving your walls. one of his arms snaked its way under your arm to grip your throat, another one held your tummy, another spread your legs enough for him to continue fucking you, and the last one held him up.
His hips met your asscheeks in a monsteristic rhythm, a burning sensation beginning to form on your flesh. your eyes rolled into the back of your head as your jaw layed slack open, drool running down your chin.
he was fucking his cum into you, making your soul intertwine with his in more ways than one. He fucked you through your next and final orgasm, your legs shook involuntarily as your guys' mixed cum got everywhere. it dripped down sukuna's cock, onto the mattress, between your thighs, onto his abdomen, all over your asscheeks, it was everywhere.
Your eyes closed, even as his thrusts continued, your mind faded away from your body and before you fully lost consciousness, you could hear sukuna's words ring through your ears.
"Ill see you soon, y/n."
#sukuna x reader#jjk#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#sukuna ryomen x reader#sukuna ryomen smut#jjk x reader smut#sukuna true form#sukuna smut#ryomen sukuna smut#ryomen x reader#sukuna jjk#sukuna jujutsu kaisen
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Gonna be real yall I think the vets office is a tad traumatizing for me 👍
#had one of the most emotionally taxing and exhausting days in a while#im petsitting for my neighbor and i ended up having to take his dog to the emergency vet and was there for 8 hours#during which many Many people came to pick up ashes and that coupled with the fact that the last time we went to the emergency vet. you know#made it genuinely so hard to be there like on top of the fact that i knew it wasnt going to be great news#and then having to be the one to take the news that the dog has cancer which is obviously not a great prognosis... really rough day#and like having to see a lot of people coming in to put down their pets it was really really rough#and i feel really guilty even tho i know its not my fault the dog is sick and i couldnt have done anything#but like their cat went into kidney failure like right after they got back from their last trip when i was watching them#so it feels like im a harbinger of doom atp 🥴#and i am and have been really frustrated that theyve been going on so many trips exactly because#i was afraid of something like this happening like you have a senior dog and you KNOW goldens are prone to health issues#their last dog literally died bc of undetected cancer while they were on a trip#and this guy has been generally really healthy and was acting perfectly fine until last night#but still hes old and its just so unfair to him that theyve been traveling so much#i think total over this year ive watched him for roughly 3 months and like. i personally think that if you have a dog#you dont just get to do whatever like you have a duty to your dog but especially to older dogs
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state of grace ❀ s. reid x reader
in which your cat has taken liking to your friend with benefits, and you begin to battle with the consequential feelings.
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader genre: fluff (18+ for suggestive content) tags: established friends with benefits. reader has a cat. your cat likes him more than you :( avoidant!reader for like a teensie second. it's okay happy ending. the happiest possible ending actually. fade to black. word count: 1.9k a/n: sometimes the most beautiful poetry can be about simple things. like a cat. :) im a dog person. idk why i wrote this.
Seventeen times.
That is how many times Spencer Reid had found residence at your apartment in the past month alone, taking up the space on the other side of your bed. Thirteen of those times he had stayed the night. Six of those times, he had come for sex. The other eleven? He had come because you needed a friend.
Or, rather, your cat did.
You had discovered you weren't any more complex than your average man, at the end of the day. Human beings are at their core created to love and be loved, and by extension, to want and be wanted. You wanted Spencer, and you were wanted by Spencer. For both your friendship, and the intimacy your relationship provided.
But you did not love him, and he did not love you.
Cat's are anything but fickle creatures. A lot of your best friendships were centred around whether or not your cat developed a liking to the person or not. Oftentimes, your fleeting relationships came down to the odd sixth sense the animal had for disliking the worst people. That, and your one night stands were never a crowd favourite within the walls of your apartment. And yet; Spencer Reid.
He was nothing short of charming. In a sort of dorky way, yes. But whatever socially romantic skills he lacked, he most certainly made up for by giving you the best of just about everything in bed. A small part of you wants to claim it's human instinct to know how to worship the person meant for you, but the logical reason is probably his eidetic memory knowing exactly what he's doing after a singular trial run. Entertaining the thought of being his soulmate was not a wise choice.
He most certainly was your cat's, though. The Ragdoll always jumping down to greet him the second he stepped foot in your apartment, usually resulting in the break of a kiss and a five minute intermission before the two of you could do anything.
At first, it was an inconvenience. Your cat had never taken such a liking to a person you'd brought home before, and it was jarring to watch a man you were partially trying to undress, stop everything to pet your cat. Now, it is simply endearing. You've stopped trying to steal Spencer's attention before the cat does, and you've come to the conclusion that Spencer's priority list will always be the feline, then you.
Today was, seemingly, no different. Despite the dull ache between your legs and the fact that this visit had started as something as obscene as Spencer calling from his work bathroom to ask if he could come over after for he was, and you quote, in dire need to touch you (among many other things), whatever those needs were, were put on hold.
You smile regardless, leaning against the edge of your couch as he crouches down to meet Po — yes, like the panda — his hand immediately reaching out for the cat to run his head along.
Spencer's head lifts to look at you. "Morgan thinks Po isn't a real cat, and we've just got a name for your—um—" his brain catches up to his mouth mid sentence, and he's stammering his way to silence.
"Please tell me you defended my cat's honour," you retort.
"I did! I even showed him the photo I took of him while you were in the shower last week. He thinks it's a different person's cat."
You shake your head in disapproval. "Unbelievable. Your coworker thinks we've named my pussy."
"That's just Morgan."
"I wish Po could speak English. Then he could hear this nonsense, and stop loving you more than me," you grumble, and Spencer's lips twitch up into a smile, as he situates himself on the floor, the cat climbing into his lap.
"Actually, he technically can. Cat's can understand up to thirty-five words in whatever language you train them in. Also, when they meow, they begin trying to mimic the sound of certain human words. It's their vocal tract that prevents them from literally speaking English," he explains.
But, you're too invested in the way his long fingers are delicately running through the cat's hair, to both respond, and really pay any attention at all.
You had had fleeting thoughts about real feelings for Spencer two months ago. Brushing them off as loneliness and your need to satiate the hopeless romantic within you, you'd forgotten about it up until this recent week.
He'd been over every single day, sometimes for sex, oftentimes for a movie and dinner (which was usually a bowl of pasta you had overestimated while cooking). And every single time, you'd developed an overwhelming anxious pit in your stomach when watching him interact with Po, your heart fluttering the entire time, mind running rampant on domestic thoughts you should be squashing.
Should be, but weren't.
You'd tried to put it down to the motherly instinct you had over the animal. Seeing somebody else treat him with as much love and care as you did was endearing — it wasn't a Spencer Reid specific trait. Yet, here you were.
"I feel like the benefits of this relationship have changed," you say, seating yourself in front of Spencer on the floor, Po lifting his head to look at the person behind the sudden movement, before he let it rest back on Spencer's thigh.
"To what?"
"My cat," you huff, and Spencer laughs.
"He is my favourite benefit thus far," he muses.
"The feeling is definitely mutual," you nod your head to Po, whose eyes were now shut, seemingly quite comfortable disregarding all your personal plans and taking Spencer's attention.
"Animals don't usually like me," he comments. "I don't know why Po is different."
Oh, you had a few ideas why.
"Maybe he's exercising the keep your enemies closer life motto," you offer, and Spencer's eyebrows shoot up in faux offence.
"This is unadulterated love," he protests. "He does not think of me as an enemy."
"That's what he wants you to believe," you hum, pushing yourself up on your legs. "Well, since plans have been rudely interrupted, do you want some dinner?"
"Sure," he answers, though his attention is back on Po. Clearly so, for he says, "I'll get to our original plans after we eat, don't worry," almost absentmindedly.
It's the kind of thing that makes you forget you're in the room with the dictionary definition of a nerd. You know it's only because sometimes he says what he is thinking without thinking. It doesn't do anything to help the ongoing internal battle about your feelings for him.
Or maybe he does know exactly what he's doing.
"You should get a cat," you say, heading into your kitchen to find something for the two of you to eat. "You seem to like them enough."
"Why? I have yours."
"I'm not going to be around forever," you reply, unthinking. "I mean, one day we're gonna have to end this because the other has found someone they want to be with. Properly. It wouldn't be fair to keep a friendship."
He falls silent, and when you lift your head, you see he's staring at you with an almost confused frown on his face, which triggers your own confusion to appear. His scratching of Po's head has been interrupted, and you're starting to question what was wrong about what you had said.
Sure, you're pretty sure you have feelings for him, but as far as you knew, they were one sided. Right?
"I didn't—I thought—" he cuts himself off, takes a deep breath, then continues. "I thought that had changed this past month."
"What do you mean?"
"I just—I've been here for things other than sex a lot. I thought you knew I liked you, and you were subtly trying to tell me you liked me too. I'm starting to sense I misread that."
For a profiler, he was incredibly awful at reading you.
"Yeah..." You slowly nod your head, but it's the deepening of his frown that has you rushing to add, "I mean, I—I do. Like you. I'm kind of embarrassed that was obvious. But I didn't think you liked me outside of having sex with me. I wasn't trying to communicate my feelings. I was trying to hide them."
"Oh," he falls silent again. "So the times I’ve been here in the past month weren’t makeshift dates?"
"They weren't intended that way..." you trail off. "Did you see them as dates?"
"Kind of, I guess," he's back to running his fingers through Po's fur, just to keep his anxious hands busy. "They don't have to be, if you don't want them to. I just thought this feeling was mutual and we were... I guess, dating."
"The feeling is mutual," you quickly correct him. "I know that now. I didn't think we were dating because I didn't think you liked me back. Changing our relationship kind of needs to be a conversation."
"Right," he breathes out, an awkward smile painting his lips. "Is this the conversation, then?"
"I guess?"
"So now we're dating."
"If that's what you want," you nod, head feeling a little fuzzy.
"Is it what you want?" he presses. Always the gentleman.
"Maybe," you muse, leaning forwards against the kitchen countertop.
He's watching you, and for a second you let the silence fall over you, fearful that you've just discouraged him enough to ruin things between you. He carefully takes Po off his lap, the cat running into your room the second his paws hit the hardwood floor, and he's standing up to move over to you.
"I don't like maybe," he frowns. "Yes or no?"
You blink, realising he was evidently too anxious of your genuine response to have any recognition to your poor attempt of a joke.
"Yes, Spencer. That's what I want," you're breathless as you speak, and you're thankful for the relieved smile that stretches across his lips.
"That's what I want too," he answers.
"Yeah, I figured." Your second attempt at a tease lands, and he huffs a small laugh, which warms your heart. "Do you still want dinner?"
He had somehow gotten closer to you throughout the awkward enough conversation, and he was sliding his arms around your waist. Something he had done many times before, yes, and yet this time it was feeling much more intimate, and your heart was thrumming against your chest a little harder than usual.
"Maybe it can wait?" he offers, ducking his head down, lips ghosting over your own. "I don't have a bothersome cat keeping me preoccupied from you, now."
Despite yourself, you poke a finger into his chest and say, "Don't insult Po."
"I'm not. Just merely stating an obvious fact."
"I'll call him back in here to preoccupy me."
"He has selective hearing. And he likes me more than you."
Your lips drop into a frown, lower lip jutting out, and Spencer is quick to try and kiss it off within seconds of noticing it.
"I'm sorry. That was mean. I promise he doesn't like me more than you," he says, though his voice is too amused to be entirely sincere.
"That was mean," you agree with a firm nod. "You're very mean to me, Spencer Reid."
"I know, I'm awful. Can I make it up to you, sweet girl?"
Well, when he asks you like that.
"Mm..." you hesitate, but he's already guiding you around, walking you backwards, through your apartment and towards your bedroom. "Yeah, I guess so."
Hands that were around your waist hike your shirt up, his lips still kissing against your skin despite the intense multitasking he was forcing upon the two of you.
"Thank you."
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