#i had this in my phone for a week or 2
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This is how the scene went right?
#tadeo jones#tad the lost explorer#sry for being slightly ded in the tad fanbase. im still in my tad hyperfixation trust me#tad textposts#memes#textposts#textpost#i had this in my phone for a week or 2#pls laugh
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🌟🌟🌟 Ladynoir in the nightsky!! 🌟🌟🌟 Happy Secret Santa @bravechamomile !! This was super fun to make, I hope you like it! And thank you @mlsecretsanta for organising this :)
#ladynoir#miraculous ladybug#ml#ml fanart#my art#secret santa#ml secret santa#ive actually had this as my phone background for 2 weeks now dkjfdnkjn i really like how this turned out!
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#one piece#sanji#black leg sanji#everysanji#ch594#summit war saga#jfc queuing from my phone temporarily bc i havent had internet for TWO WEEKS!!!!!#i still have 2 weeks in the queue but its making me nervous so here i am#goddddddd just so many things falling into the wrong place#like my entire router died. the guy who could have addressed the problem#didnt come the day i reported it but instead waited until after his 5 day vacation#and then it was put off for another day bc he had to catch up on other stuff#then we find out the issue is with the router itself so we had to order a new one#and then when they tried to install it today there were more issues#so now i have to wait until tomorrow and im so fucking mad#well anyway
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another snippet from the next chapter of ‘now i’m glad i get forever’ that I’m pretty sure is surviving the chopping block 🤞
#anyone who has commented about updates i hope this somehow finds you and i’m sorry 😭#i feel terrible#emotionally i’ve been very overchewed gum and life just keeps on chomping these past few weeks#but i am so so hopeful (read: praying) about getting chapter 2 posted this month#i’ve been going through a bit of a dark night of the soul writing wise#but these two and their purple son remain my emotional crutches through it all#aizawa shouta#yamada hizashi#erasermic#i had to proofread this on my phone in a moving car this morning so hopefully there are no glaring errors 🥲#fake dating real feelings#liza writes
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mentioned before I havent felt any tangible significant benefit from meds yet which is fine bc it takes a while to kick in but one small good thing i have noticed so far is even when I get little sleep I feel less tired when I wake up
I don't feel completely incapacitated and in need of being in bed all day, fighting off the urge to nap, to recharge.
I also 1. actually get "Sleepy" now... instead of just feeling very hollowly "Tired" and like i Should be going to bed to try to sleep even though I don't feel like it, because it's about time to be doing that I guess, leading to tossing and turning for 3 hrs before finally succumbing to sleep.
and 2. I actually doze off. Instead of forcing self to try and initiate sleep...this has only ever happened during my rare Naps where im so tired that sleep puts me down by force. Never in actual night time sleep setting... im like dropping my phone and struggling to stay awake sometimes now. At night!!!
None of this is in any of the results I've seen for the medication so i dont even care if its some weird placebo somehow 😭 im jst glad its happening
#talkys#a week before i started taking it i had one day where i just never felt ''sleepy'' despite taking 2 melatonin#and feeling very Tired so i just didnt fall asleep. and then when night came again I still went to bed at 5 am and struggled to fall asleep#now we get to 3 am and my body is like ok start wrapping it up im sleepy i want to go to bed i want to go to bed#last nite i didnt fall asleep until 6 am but that was because I forced self to stay awake for comms + got engrossed in phone#time and also the dogs kept howling outside. i woke up at 12pm and did I feel tired? yeah#does the tiredness feel like extreme pain behind my eyes and a hollow aching empty head that keeps me from moving? it does not...!#its like in the very back of my mind...its present but not demanding all my time#in college i would go thru a daydream to fall asleep and i wouldnt even make it to the end before i dozed off#that hasnt worked in years and now its working again
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people in the sims 4 modding community are fightinggggggg bc one of the build cc creators is paywalling their stuff for months before releasing it for free to the public when most cc creators range from like. 2 weeks to a month?? anyway it’s a fight to the death between people who say anyone having a problem with it should just make their own and is automatically entitled and get ur bag know ur worth etc and people who say yeah sure but don’t be so rude to people asking why you’re releasing holiday content to the public in february. anyway i see elements of both sides so im watching the arguing like a cat watching christmas tree ornaments
#i’m probably making this seem bigger it was only a few reddit threads but i was fascinated#i just checked and they have over 3000 paid members and the tiers are $2 and $4 so like. no wonder ur putting up long ads paywalls#ass** phone i meant ASS#anyway as a ~content creator~ myself who doesn’t get paid and instead has paid for like software and stuff. that creator needs to get over#themself aksjakdjflg . but like it comes with the territory when you toe the line between ‘i make this stuff bc im passionate and love the#response i get from others and the joy it brings ME’ and ‘hey i’m pretty good at this let me see if i can make a living off it’#like both are valid thoughts. but that’s where most cc creators’ ideal setup comes from. give a paid option for a bit early then release to#the public a few weeks later. anyway idk why i’m rambling i think it’s bc i slept so long and had a bad dream that my mom bought a second#dishwasher and REPLACED our stove and we got in a huge fight only for me to wake up and realize it was a dream and i shouldn’t actually be#mad at her akdhakshdkfl
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also picking raspberries turned out to be.. really fucking hard
#it's so physically demanding broo ToT#idk i feel like im just weak af because some people there seem to do it so easily and i can barely#do half a day#and they want me to do a full day tomorrow bro#like#I'm so tired after half a day..#i genuinely feel like i might just collapse or something#i do want that bit of money tho but it's sooo exhausting#i went there for half a day today and it killed me bro i was just lying in bed#and i didn't want to fall asleep cause it was like noon already but#i didn't even have the energy to look at a phone lmao#well it's gonna be over this week probably cause#the raspberries are going to stop growing in a few days apparently they're saying in 2 days#we're going to be done#I'd love to make more money but I don't think i can fucking do ittt#its so physically demanding whyyyyy#and why are there grandmas working with me in that field and they seem just fine BROOOO TOT#but yeah now that im thinking about it this also might be part of my problems cause#im soo much.ore irritable rn just cause im literally exhausted all the time ughhh#i came back home 3 days ago and i haven't even had the time to sit down at a desk and draw something#not even mentioning energy aughhh
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I'm back and Guys they played my favourite song they played where your eyes don't go and they played spy and last wave and the darlings of lumberland and let me tell you about my operation and
#my back hourts ough. and i totally froze my ass of standing in that queue in the rain for 2 and a half hours#but well it was worth it for the spot right by the stage!!!!!!#and oh my gosh. oh mmy god. this was so!!!!!!!#well first of all it was so damn fun i was bouncing and singing along the whole time#and there were so many great moments even besides the fact that the setlist was AHHHFHG SO FUCKING GOOD?????#and it actually got even more crazy during the second sent it was all just one 'no way' moment after another#and my pal got the setlist i'm so happy for them..... but uyeah i have so much to talk about#i'm totally making that proper concert review later and going into detail on all the stuff#and i actually got many more videos than i planned because as i said there were so many 'NO WAY i gotta record this' moments#like i actually don't know if i should just put them on youtube and link them here or what#because i have the entirety of spy recorded among other things#well first i'll need to make sure that the videos came out ok but i probably shouldn't have to worry about that much#thankfully my brother's phone is pretty well suited for this kind of stuff unlike mine#anyway will get into all that later like later next week even maybe so when i'm back home#in the meantime i'll have to reflect on all this anazingness. oh my god this was so awesome.#as my pal said it's so easy to undestand now why there are people who go to hunderds of their concerts and never get bored of it all#so worth the wait i love you tmbg i had so much fun aaaaahhhhh ok going to bed now i'm so tired but very happy#goosepost
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what is going on w my brain
#huge tag rant coming but dw about it#basically. if anyone here has known me on the internet for long enough yous will have gathered that i badly struggle w motivation and#fulfilling goals that i set for myself even if it's for smth i enjoy eg languages#it happens so often but especially over summer where my brain just goes Nope#“i have all this free time to do the thing I've been planning for weeks and i've been so excited about planning but now we have the time i#will be numb and sad and scroll“#i also have huge problems focusing unless every factor is perfectly balanced and even then it's still 50/50#i do have a bad attention span from being chronically online but even if you put me in a blank room w my task i'd be distracted by thoughts#external deadlines are some of the only things that can kick me into gear and i've been fine at uni so far#but i'm scared i'll have another a levels situation where my mental health was so awful i missed every essay deadline for french for 2 years#sometimes by up to a month#the only reason i got away w it is because i had a breakdown in front of my teacher and he was like “yeah take care of yourself the essays#are not that deep just get them in first thing after half term ig“#like that was v kind of him but if i ever have a situation that bad again i will genuinely fail uni cus you can't get away w that#where was i going w this (<- is aware of the irony)#right yeah this week i've experienced the epic highs and lows#highs of really enjoying my downtime and putting active effort into my hobbies instead of my downtime being “scrolling but i don't hate it”#but lows of realising how much time i 'wasted' in my teen years feeling sad and scrolling when i could have been developing skills and#having fun#and yeah i'm having a high rn and genuinely enjoying life but it's making me realise that my default state of being is just 😐#like even when i'm at uni where my mental health is so much better than at home when it's just me home alone or in my room i'm just 😐#not really having fun just existing v passively mindlessly scrolling waiting for the day to be over so i can see my friends in the morning#like not every day has to be amazing but surely there's more to life than just 😐 in 99% of your downtime#like i've struggled for years on how to answer “what do you do in your free time” cus i had to search for answers#i read and go on walks. which is true. but they were always things i did as phone breaks during weekends and not something i actively did#because i liked them#and because of past mental health issues reading and sports based hobbies have become tainted for me#i'm working on it but yeah#huge tldr. i'm finally starting to accept that i probably have a combo of undiagnosed mental illness and neurodivergence#because if it's taken me this long to realise how much it truly impacts my enjoyment of life then surely that's smth
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i love it when im like whyyyy am i so anxious and sad… am i just a loser…. whats wrong with me… and then i have to sit and think for a minute like hm have you perhaps considered the like 4-5 ongoing extremely stressful situations youve been experiencing lately. like oh shit dude good point
#at work constantly at my super stressful job its 100 degrees every day i come home to the ppl couchsurfing one of whom i do not like#who were supposed to be out 2 months ago#to the messy as fuck dirty apartment covered in roaches#and once a week i get to see my only friends and now their new roommate is super fucking annoying and throwing the vibes off#ntm everything setting off my chronic pain rn#aaaaaaaaaaaa#also there was a like 2 week stretch where i got a wisdom tooth pulled and my phone broke and there was a hurricane. and i STILL had work
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#hyperspecific poll#had to edit this on desktop bc my phone no longer lets me edit drafts smh#1- it was for my little pony versions of my friends/acquaintances#2- her name is two letters off from mine. and her middle name is our sister's middle name.#3- learned it in pre-algebra and it fuckin rocks. highly recommend#4- texture :(#5- thaaaaats beetlejuice! speaking of which im a couple weeks away from my 1 year anniversary#6- vermont. my parents got busy after i was born + didnt take me. my older sister got to see it though#7- all of my biological grandparents + my stepmom's mom#8- his name's tom and he's doing great! hes totally blind so we had to force-feed him but now he eats if you touch a mealworm to his lips.#9- thanks keith. i still love virtual riot and pegboard nerds and grant and WRLD and#10- THEYRE SO PRETTY!!! to be fair i think i prefer piano and organ for being able to play chords and stuff but in a group french horn is A
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wtpr really needs to focus on what i personally want to watch, which is the everything abt episodes 1 and 2 and not the borderline unwatchable romcom moments shoehorned into a story that is primarily about inter-marital blackmail and copious threats of kidnapping. why is there cringe in my thriller
#upsetting!#when the phone rings#still watching tho. ep 6 had its ups (the cliff/the reveal/the creepy kid drowning thing) and downs (WHAT was that retreat ?????)#but overall it's still hitting i'm just disappointed in the general lack of manipulation and mind games in these 2 episodes#acc i probs would've been fine with them if we hadn't had to wait another week thus enabling me to have expectations#however. kdrama writers PLEASE let the 'accidental-kiss-due-to-falling-over' trope die. it's begging to be put down#why r u nuking my man. why is he on the floor :/#i've come to the realisation that i enjoy it more when they're arguing. hm. things to ponder
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#im about to FREAK OUT bcs of my boss#like yes i'm so thankful and happy to be employed. really.#but my boss is so#it feels like he's never doing anything.... he's only in the office max 2 days per week and idk#hes just very strange#but the worst thing is that he just takes his own work and dumps it on me#which is fine in some ways! like i sometimes just sit around with no work to do#so then it's good to have something to do#but today... not only did i already have a shit ton of work to do but#he tells me to book a hotel for a conference they're having ?? and that's not even near what's in my work description??????#(i basically just do numbers rn. i sit with spreadsheets and move numbers around and stuff like that)#and the worst part is that he told me i cant email them... i must call........#and i get that this sounds super silly to those who don't have a fear of speaking on the phone but#it makes me freak the f out#i cant even talk on the phone with my parents. or my brother. or a friend. like genuinely just no i cant#it brings out so so much anxiety in me#i get dizzy just thinking about it#and again this is really really not even similar to anything in my job description ???? i wouldn't have signed up if i knew i had to do thi#and when i have things that i need to do but i physically cant then my brain just goes into pause mode and i don't do anything at all#instead of doing one of the many things i *could* do (like write an email anyway)#there's just no way im gonna be able to call but idk what my boss is gonna think if i mail.... because he specifically said that i must cal#rrGGG im just so frustrated!!!!!#and i needed to get this out.... soz for the rant#i just think i would cry (genuinely) if i were to make that call#alSO BECAUSE THE INSTRUCTION IS SO UNCLEAR LIKE ALWAYS WITH THIS GUY#I DONT EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT IM SUPPOSED TO DO#gonna go drink a lot of water so i dont cry now 👍 sorry bye
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At the bank with my mom while she makes car payments
Oh my LORD people are not exaggerating when people say literally everything is harder for disabled people
#rambles#they only added an auto pay system like 6 weeks ago#they don't let her pay online or over phone because she mostly uses a different bank#and the lady on the phone that she had to talk to because she was 2 months late I guess#LITERALLY said “You need to spend your lunch breaks better we all have responsibilities”#disabilities#disabled#chronic illness#nothing makes me more angry than when people disrespect my momma#if this were a year ago she wouldn't have been ABLE to go to the bank and pay#why the hell does she need to be actively in a hospital to gain your fucking respect
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here we go 🫡
#da4#dragon age#da: veilguard#i've had this queued for 2 months lol#will i temporarily delete this app from my phone so i don't get spoiled? remains to be seen#anyway see yall in a week
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ive felt so cringe and insecure about my simblr lately but i think im finally getting over that so standstill update tmrw !
#idk why but sometimes i get in these bouts where im like How can i even call myself a storyteller………. I’m A Fraud#then i remember this is simblr and it isnt that serious and now im a little normal now only a little though#i have had this update ready for 2 weeks i just had to get over my cringe first#we cannot let the fear of cringe win my friends the ppl in my phone 🧘
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