#i got so many blogs this one became the main and the main became a side blog lol
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sitp-recs · 1 year ago
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Can I ask what made you leave the fandom and what made you come back to it?
I have a love/hate relationship with it, in the sense that I love it soooo much that it can take over everything else. It’s addictive and I often find myself consuming an unhealthy amount of fics, and I can’t stop it. I feel it’s a blessing and a curse at the same time.
I feel you anon 🫂 hyperfixations are self-care but can also get unhealthy very quickly and it’s hard to manage our fandom engagement when we’re “in the zone”. I used to feel bad about it but now I indulge small breaks at the slightest sign of burnout, just to take a breather. I must have taken at least 3 breaks in the past 2 years (the blog was still active, I just wasn’t reading or reccing anything for a while). The reasons vary between feeling overwhelmed with too many new fics, feeling disconnected from fandom in general, or finding competing obsessions that take my fic time and energy away.
The longer breaks I mentioned before had other reasons: first one (2008-2011) due to an intense studying time between high school years and university entry, I barely did anything else and only came back to fandom because AO3 was launched and I found RurouniHime 🙌 then I got fully immersed in the MCU between 2013 and 2019, following the first Avengers movie.
Stony was a short-lived but very passionate ship phase for me, I was almost as obsessed as I am with Drarry and joined Tumblr to interact with the community, not a shy lurker anymore! But Civil War effectively killed the ship for me and I moved onto another OTP before losing interest in the MCU completely after Tony was killed off. Major kudos to @quicksilvermaid for dragging me back into Drarry by unknowingly posting the incredible Who we are in the shadows on my birthday, felt like a sign 💘
I used to come back because I loved the HP universe and was constantly revisiting the books and movies. Now JK has ruined that, so I come back for the sense of community, and to share this experience with the friends I’ve made here. Creating this blog and connecting with people changed my whole fandom experience - even if sometimes I still enjoy being a lurker and exploring smaller, less overwhelming fandoms! Take care of yourself, anon. Enjoy the ride but don’t let the addictive aspect take you away from enjoying life and your other hobbies! 💜
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juniperskye · 3 months ago
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Three’s Company
This is just a lil blurb about Aaron Hotchner, Derek Morgan and you being in love! Based on the following Request: @satans-bitch Hi! Idk if you would be comfortable writing it, but I love the idea of Aaron hotchner x reader x Derek Morgan just all being so in love with each other. Thank u Xx – I took some creative liberties…I hope you like it!
Hotch x BAU! Fem Reader x Morgan
Word count: 883
REQUESTS ARE OPEN - not edited - please be kind. Requests are open and feedback is welcome if it's constructive!
Warnings: My blog is 18+, minors DNI, Fem reader, pet names, poly-relationship (I’m not the most familiar with this lifestyle) canon typical violence, mantion of babies and pregnancy, Let me know if I missed any.
I do not consent to having my work translated or reposted to any other site. That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.
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So, neither Derek nor Aaron ever and I mean EVER thought they’d be in a polyamorous relationship. But let me tell you, when you arrived at the BAU, they both knew they had to have you. Aaron had gone to Dave time and time again seeking advice and Derek did the same with Penelope.
They’d both complain that there was no way you were interested, because clearly you like the other guy. Only, that wasn’t quite the issue.
You didn’t just like Aaron or Derek, you liked them both. They were so similar and yet so different and there was no way you could ever choose just one of them.
After many instances of the men fighting for your attention and affection, you pulled them both aside to have a serious conversation.
“I think I should leave the BAU.” You stated.
“What? No!” Derek blurted.
“Why would you think that?” Aaron inquired. “If our behavior has made you uncomfortable, I am so sorry. It was never my intention, and I would hate to see such a talented agent leave because of my idiocy.”
“It’s not your guy’s behavior that’s making me feel this way. It’s my feelings for you.” You said, gesturing to both men.
“Feelings for who?” Derek questioned.
“Both of you.” You blushed.
That evening you’d explained to the men that you had feelings for both of them and had the situation been different you’d have suggested a poly relationship, but you knew that it was too much to ask of two alpha males who’d never been in one before.
What you hadn’t expected to happen was for them to give you a quizzical look and then ask you to give them some time to think about it.
--
It had been nearly a year since then and the three of you had developed something truly beautiful. Aaron had been so stoic at work but at home he was soft, and he always did everything in his power to ensure you and Derek were both cared for.
And well Derek, he was clingy at home. Always wanting his hands on you and he’d come to really enjoy having physical contact with Aaron.
Like when you’d watch a movie, Aaron would have his arm slung over the back of the couch while you cuddled up into his side, and Derek would be sitting as close to you as possible, practically sitting you in his lap. This position would allow for Aaron’s hand to rest around Derek as well and that warmth became a comfort for him.
There had been another shift shortly after that, pet names…they’d been slipping out more frequently. And not just them men using them with you either.
“Sweetheart can you pass me my phone?” Aaron had asked, looking directly at Derek.
“Sure thing sugar.” Derek had replied.
You had been shocked initially, but it ultimately had warmed your heart to see them falling into this relationship more and more. Their comfort in this had been your main priority, you hadn’t cared about anything else.
--
Work had been the toughest part of this newfound dynamic. When any of you got hurt on a case, the other two couldn’t exactly hold it together. And with the team being out of the loop of your lifestyle, well they definitely suspected something.
The most recent had been Aaron, he had been shot while taking down an unsub. Thankfully it had been a flesh wound, but when you heard the shot and saw him go down, you couldn’t help the wail that tore through you. The paramedics had requested you step away, and Derek pulled you into his embrace to get you to comply.
“Baby he’s gonna be okay!” Derek said while holding you close.
“He was shot D! What if he’s not?” You cried.
“I know he’s gonna be okay baby. He has to be.” Derek mumbled the last part.
You looked up to see the tears falling from his misty eyes, and you held him tighter. The team sat by and watched the situation play out, fully convinced now that something was transpiring between the three of you. More than they had initially assumed.
--
The newest development had been the discussion of children. The guys had baby fever, they had seen you interacting with your sister’s newborn and you swear you saw them both drooling over the sight of you.
So…have you ever thought about having kids princess?” Derek posed.
Currently you were lying on the couch, your head in Derek’s lap and him pressed against Aaron. The movie playing, long forgotten as Derek combed his fingers through your hair and Aaron traced shapes on Derek’s bicep.
“Um, yes…I have thought about it. Why do you ask?” You sat up.
“Well, honey, we had a conversation about it the other day.” Aaron clarified.
“You two…had a conversation about me having a baby?” You questioned.
“About us…having a baby.” Derek said, gesturing to the three of you.
Your jaw dropped in shock. What had started as inappropriate flirting in the workplace had developed into a serious relationship between the three of you. One fueled by love, safety, and trust.
“I would love to have a baby with you guys.” You smiled. “I love you.”
“I love you.”
“I love you.”
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missnxthingg · 2 months ago
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Hiii, i saw that you wanted some requests with Lando:
Lando and Reader met through a mutual friend. They met only about 3-4 months ago and have been talking almost every day since then. Both have fallen for each other but are too scared to admit it, feeling like it would be too soon/ quick. One day or night, after another win for Lando where the reader was invited to the Grand Prix and staying at the same hotel, they spend some time alone, just talking. At some point, the conversation becomes quiet, and Lando suddenly says, "I think I'm in love with you, and that scares the shit out of me."
WE CAN'T BE (JUST) FRIENDS ✮ LN4
pairing: Lando Norris x Female!Reader (strangers to lovers) summary: After meeting each other through mutual friends, Lando Norris and Y/N L/N became strangely close in such little time words: 4.5K - warnings: lots of fluff, just a tiny bit of swearing and not proof read author's notes: I thought this one was already up for a loooong time. So that being said, I'm sorry for taking too long to get to your request. I just loved it so much, that I wanted to make sure everything was perfectly written for you. This one is to celebrate the WCC!
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The loud music and the lights of the club were making Lando’s head spin, but he enjoyed that feeling. Every summer break, he finds some time to escape from his routine and run away with his friends to enjoy his days and nights in Ibiza. Tonight it wasn’t different; he had been having the time of his life with his friends so far and, at that moment, he was being dragged around the club by Pietra, his best friend’s girlfriend, as she looked around for one of her friends.
“I swear to you, she’s the sweetest girl in the world”, she told him earlier that day, while they were lounging by the pool and enjoying the sun in Spain. “She’s this girl I met in uni, and it’s pathetic how much you’re alike. I’ve actually been dying to introduce her to our friend group”.
“P, I know what you’re doing”, Lando chuckled. “And I’m not looking forward into being in a relationship at the moment, despite yours and Max’s attempts”.
On the past few months, his best friend and his girlfriend have made it their personal commitment to find Lando a new girl. Even though he was living a dreamy life, with success, wealth and every girl he ever wanted, they both knew it got very lonely for his friend. They wanted him to find someone who would care and love him as he deserves, and couldn’t help but try helping him in this journey. But after getting his heart broken in his last relationship, he wasn’t really interested in dating at the moment.
“Fuck, no! I don’t want you to date her. Despite her being, literally, your clone, I really want Y/N to just be part of our friend group. Because she’s a really nice person that I think we would love to be around, and she doesn’t have many friends since she moved to London recently”, Pietra explained. “And I would actually be very happy if you don’t fuck things up by trying to sleep with her”.
Lando knew that Pietra was lying; deep down, it was just another one of her schemes to try playing cupid in his life. But he couldn’t help but feel intrigued by her story. If she thought this girl was so special to the point where she didn’t want him to hit on her, then there must be something really good in her. That’s why he was now looking for Y/N around the busy and hot club in Ibiza after an entire afternoon wondering what she would be like.
“Oh, there she is!”, Pietra pointed out to a girl looking a little bit lost at the club, right close to the entrance. She smiled once she spotted her friend, relieved to finally see a familiar face after an entire day alone. “You finally made it! I’m so glad you’re here”
“I know, right? It’s good to finally escape our rainy London and get a tan”, the girl giggled and suddenly her eyes caught Lando’s at mid-sentence. He was speechless at the sight of her, forgetting how to speak, breath or move, for that matter.
Y/N was clearly one of the most attractive girls he had ever seen in his life. That night, she was wearing a strapless light green, almost white, dress that perfectly highlighted her curves. Her hair was tied in a bun, and it helped to show off her tan bikini lines. She just exhales a sweet aura, and he was instantly fascinated by her. If she was half of the things Pietra said about her, then Lando was sure she was the most beautiful woman in the world.
“Lando, this is Y/N, my friend from uni that I was talking about earlier”, Pietra introduced. “And Y/N, this is Lando, Max’s best friend”.
“It’s very nice to finally meet you, Lando. P talks very highly of you”, Y/N extended her hand and Pietra had to pinch his arm in order to get him out of his trance, taking her hand into his.
“It’s nice to meet you too, Y/N”, he responded, opening the biggest smile. Contrary to his usual behaviour around girls, he decided to stick with his sympathetic smile, instead of his flirty one, just because something said that he should try being different with this girl. His sixth sense was right, and there was something very special about her. “And same here. She always goes on and on about how nice you are. I’m glad to finally put a face to the name”.
“Come on! We have a table near the DJ booth and everyone else is waiting for us”, Pietra entwined her arms with both of her friends, settling between them before she dragged them around the club.
Lando doesn’t remember the last time he felt butterflies in his stomach. It had been so long that he had forgotten what it was like. It hit him so hard that he had to take a few seconds before coming back to reality and used a shot of tequila to help him get his mind back together; or at least let loose for a second and forget about that feeling. While it was very good, it was still very scary to feel that way.
“Didn’t even wait for me to do shots”, Lando heard Y/N’s voice speak from behind him as he put the tiny cup back on the bar counter. She found a spot right next to him and waited for the bartender, who was now serving another group of friends right next to them.
“I didn’t know you wanted shots”, he admitted. “But I can join you, if you want”.
“I’m just joking”, she giggled. “I’m not doing shots, I’m sorry. I just wanted a drink, thought that maybe teasing would break the ice”.
“Oh, good, because I think I might puke if I down another shot of tequila”, he laughed along and gestured to the bartender to get her order. “This lady here wants a…”
“Mojito, please”, she asked and he quickly started doing her order. Lando, being the gentleman he is, kept her company while she waited for her drink. “Something refreshing, right? It’s so damn hot tonight”.
“Yeah, I’ve been here so many times and this might be my hottest summer in Ibiza”.
“Really? It's my first time in Spain, to be honest. I was very excited when Pietra invited me to join”.
“Oh, you're going to love it. If you're a party person like me, then you might've found your perfect holiday destination”.
And Y/N definitely was a party person like him. In fact, Lando was surprised to find how much alike they were. She loved golfing, since she grew on courts around the world following her dad, a professional golfer. She loved music, and especially creating music, and knew how to play various instruments and was very good at mixing songs, and gave a try at DJing a lot of times. She was also from England's countryside, and had recently just moved to London to study Public Relations. And she most definitely had the best sense of humour, with sassy comments that could make him laugh for days.
Lando was absolutely fascinated by her. And he found it very funny how easy it was to start and maintain conversation with her. It was like they had known each other for years; like they knew each other from other lives. He simply couldn’t ignore how much he felt alive again, like she had reignited the fire on his chest once again.
Maybe that's what love at first sight feels like.
“You should come stay with us at the villa”, Lando asked, as he dropped her off at her hotel. They had taken a walk all the way back, since the club wasn't so far away from where they were staying. “There's a spare room, you know? And I don’t want you to be left out of all the fun”.
“I really don't want to bother you”, she opened a shy smile and looked away to the ocean, where the sun had started to rise.
“Please, if the people that bother me were 10% of you, my life would've been so easy”, he admitted, making her laugh. as he did all night. “You're really cool, Y/N”.
“Thanks, I think you're really cool too”, she opened a shy smile at him before pointing back to her hotel entrance. “I think I might need to get going. But I'll think about your proposal”.
“If you want to, the doors to the villa are always opened”.
After that one night in Ibiza, there was not a single day that Lando and Y/N didn’t talk to each other. It was almost funny how this friendship bloomed out of nowhere, and that's all that it was: a friendship. Before anything, Lando was really happy with what they had created, where he could live carefree. He didn’t have to be the Lando Norris, F1 driver for McLaren, that everyone had a love and hate relationship. He was just a boy that loved having time with his friends, giggling until his belly hurt and playing video games until sunrise.
For Y/N, it was good too. Ever since she moved to London, she found it difficult to create real deep connections with people. Pietra was a close case, and she absolutely loved having her as a friend; but Lando was different. He understood her in some ways no one ever did, like an instant connection written in the stars. It was like they knew each other from other lives.
"Don't become a stranger", Lando told her as they were saying their goodbyes at the end of their trip. "I know I'm not around London often, but you can always text and call me, if you want”.
He got shy with his words, afraid she would take them the wrong way. Lando looked down to the ground and played with the car keys in his hands. He only looked up when she laughed and pulled him into a hug. It caught him by surprise, but he melted into her embrace a few seconds later. That's the type of person she is – one that likes to show people how much she likes them.
"You'll be tired of seeing my face, Norris. I can assure you that".
And she kept that promise, because the months that followed that summer break completely changed their lives. It started with small things like her joining their gaming sessions when he was in Monaco, and him always taking time to see her whenever he was in England for an MTC day. They would either grab some coffee or hang out with friends. Not to forget that, when he was away racing, he made sure to maintain contact through texting and calling. 
But things started to change once they got more intimate. It all started with golfing sessions with friends, and ended up with him being invited to play with her father on the countryside. Then he invited her for an early birthday celebration with his family at his parents’ house. Not to mention the countless times they spent alone at her house in London and his flat in Monaco; literally crossing the ocean just to see each other.
“Really, the benefit of having a rich F1 driver as a friend is this”, Y/N pointed to the view of his flat, where the ocean waves crashed on the rocks and the breeze brought the comforting smell of the salty water to her nose. It was sunny in Monte Carlo, and she had been wearing a pink crochet mini shorts, a bikini and one of his white tshirts, to keep her warm while they were inside.
“You can’t get this while it’s raining all the time in London, right?”, he chuckled, still sitting on his couch. She turned her head back at him and shrugged. “You stole my shirt”.
“You left it hanging around the house”, she teased. “Can we please go to the beach now?”
“What? Don’t you like spending time with me?”
“Not inside the house, when the sun is so shiny outside”.
Lando sat back in silence and admired her for a second. The sun made her skin and her hair glow, and she looked almost angelic under the light. She hadn’t done anything special or was making an effort to look good. She was simply… beautiful. And he felt his heart soften more and more while he looked at her.
“I like spending time with you anywhere”, he commented, making Y/N’s cheeks heat up. Lando got up from his seat and approached her, leaning against the railing to also look at the view. “I’m glad you came. I think I might’ve exploded if I had to leave for three weeks and not see you before I go”.
“Well, I would never deny the opportunity to come to Monaco”, she said, and after a few seconds, she completed. “Or to see you”.
Lando opened a big smile at her. At most times, she makes him feel like a teenage boy, with butterflies in his stomach and a vivid blush on his cheeks. But he didn’t mind it by now. Actually, he started to like how he feels whenever she’s around. Y/N became a reason for him to keep smiling every day.
“Come on, let’s go to the beach”, he broke the ice, getting up from his seat to finally leave the four walls of his flat.
Y/N considered that her best day in Monaco. Lando drove her to a beautiful private beach, where she got to have a few drinks, lounge by the ocean and renovate her tan. He stood right by her side, as they talked about nothing and everything. Just like the night they met, it was so easy to make conversation with her. They never die out of subjects to talk about; and if they did, it wasn’t uncomfortable.
After lunch, he surprised her with a jet ski ride through the crystal waters of Monte Carlo. He had done it many times, but it was so cool to hear her giggles in his ears, while she held onto him to keep her steady. They felt so happy to feel the warmth of each other’s skins touching as she hugged him from behind.
The day ended with them sitting at a deck restaurant, with a great view of the sundown in the ocean. They shared drinks and had a laugh while playing a card game as a duo. Y/N won twice, and was shuffling the cards to win her third round in a roll. And while she did it, Lando took it as an invitation to observe her; the few strays that weren’t tied in her bun falling over her face, the relaxed smile on her lips and the way her skin glowed with her trapless dress. She was breathtaking. And once he was gone for another triple header, he would miss her so much.
After three days of purely Y/N, he started to worry how much her absence would have an effect on him. In such short time, he got used to her humming while doing her morning eggs to go with her avocado toast, and how she was always up to joining him at his quick gym session before going out for the day. He loved the company for mundane things such as buying groceries, watching TV and driving. Then he got sad just by thinking this would be over in a day, when their weekend would’ve passed by, and he would have to fly to Austin.
“I’m gonna miss you so much when I’m gone”, he blurted out, making her look up from her cards, straight into his eyes. They softened at his words, and she stopped shuffling cards once she understood what he was saying.
“It’s not forever, you know that”, she tried comforting him. But deep down, her heart also ached just by thinking about going for three weeks without seeing him, just after having an overdose of Lando.
“Yeah, but I’ve grown so used to your company that it will be hard to go without you”.
Y/N didn’t want to agree with his words, but she understood every single one of them. Ever since they sat at that table, she was only thinking how much it would hurt once he was away, and she would have to go back to her routine.
“Let’s not think about it right now. We still have one more day to enjoy together”, she distributed the cards for one more round, and Lando thought that was her way out of the subject. Maybe she didn’t feel the same way about him leaving. Maybe he was stepping too far into this friendship. 
After all, who gets this attached to a person after only four months since you met?
“And… I win again!”, she declared, putting her last cards down at the table and making Lando groan in frustration.
“If this was a racing track, I surely wouldn’t be losing”, he complained, making her roll her eyes.
“Well, I’ve never seen it in real life”, she shrugged, shuffling the cards in her hands. “What guarantees that the TV isn’t manipulating us all into thinking you’re winning races?”
“Then come and watch one with your own eyes”, he suggested, and the table turned silent. 
Y/N and Lando had broken many barriers in this friendship, but she never went as far as stepping foot into his job. Of course, he invites a lot of his friends to join him on the paddock, even flying them across the world to have a crowd of his own in the garage. But so far, he had never asked her. And Y/N was burning her brain out, thinking that, if she accepted this invite, he would think she was stepping too much into his privacy.
“I don’t want to bother you”.
“That’s exactly what you said the night we met. And if you hadn’t bothered me back then, we wouldn’t be friends today”, he pointed out with a smile on his face. “Pietra and Max are coming to Abu Dhabi. Maybe my mom and dad as well, but you already know them. So, you’ll have company once I’m out on track if you want to join us”.
Lando was apprehensive with her response. His mind was telling him that she wasn’t interested in coming, but he had trapped her into this proposal. But he learned to trust Y/N over time, and the smile she gave him assured that she wasn’t lying about her response.
“I would love to join you, Lando”, she said. “And I will miss you too, muppet”.
Saying goodbye the next day was hard. He held onto her a little bit longer before letting her go at the airport, and made sure to slip one of his bracelets into her wrist, just so she could have a little piece of him while he was gone. Y/N, wanting to repeat the gesture, took off her teddy bear necklace and tied it around his neck.
“I know it’s a little bit feminine, but it’s something for you to carry with you”.
“My good luck charm”, he smiled as he held the bear between his fingers. “I love it”.
“Have a safe trip”, she kissed his cheek and hugged him again. “And remember to call me every night”.
“Always”, he winked, before waving her off to pass security on the airport. “I’ll see you soon”.
“In the blink of an eye”.
Both of them really wished it was as quick as the blink of an eye. Lando remembers having only her face on his mind on his way home, and again once he was flying to Texas. He held her teddy bear between his hands every time his chest got a little tighter and carried on with the routine of calling her every night. But it definitely wasn’t the same. Y/N was going through the same thing, except that she didn’t have racing to distract her from how much she missed him. And when it got rougher, she would turn into sports news programs just to see his face, and onto the race transmissions, to see him in action.
“Congratulations on P2”, she said when he called her later on that Sunday night, after he finished on the podium in Mexico. He was getting ready to go out for dinner, but never before hearing her voice. “You did very well today”.
“Not enough to win the championship”.
“But you did good. Don’t martyr yourself”.
“I'm not. It just…”, he sighed, not knowing how to finish the sentence. “Anyway, Carlos is dragging me to have dinner with his family, and then maybe go out partying. But I just wanted to talk to you before you pass out”.
“Look at you, keeping your promise of calling every day”, she pointed out. “I appreciate it”.
“Me too. Talking to you is always the best part of the day”, he admitted, and the air shifted between them. Y/N didn't reply, but she felt all of those words warm her chest. Even without a response, he knew she felt the same. “Just one more race and I'm home”.
“So enjoy every moment, and we'll see each other soon”.
“I miss you”, he added, making Y/N smile through the phone. It was the three words he always repeated at the end of every call.
That was everything Lando could think about lately. Why did he get so attached to a person he only knew for a couple of months? It scared him how much he likes her, because it has been a while since he last felt such strong feelings for someone. He didn’t even have the heart to tell her how he feels and potentially ruin everything. Loosing her would be an absolute nightmare scenario.
“I miss you too”, she replied. “Can’t wait to see your ugly face”.
“And I can’t wait to see your pretty one”, he flirted, which made her blush from the other side of the line. Luckily, he couldn’t see the effect he had on her. “I’ll be on my first flight home, I promise”.
“Go enjoy your night with Carlos, muppet”, she chuckled. “Good night, Lan”.
“Good night, Y/N. Sleep tight”.
Their reunion in London after the Brazilian Grand Prix was quick, but very warm. Lando turned 25 and got to spend an entire week next to the people he cherished the most, including Y/N, who prepared an entire day of pampering and golfing for the birthday boy. But he left to quick for the last triple header of the year.
While it was painful to leave again, they were both excited about the last race of the season, even without any real chances of him winning the driver's championship any more. It would be the first time she would step somewhere so important for him, and he was willing to do anything to at least finish on the podium to see her smile.
After another two weeks without each other, Lando opened the biggest smile to see her walking down the hotel lobby on Thursday before the race. He had gone through a long media day and wanted nothing more to just have dinner and relax. And he surely did relax once she pulled him into a comforting hug that made him let go of all the tension he had been carrying.
“Thank God you’re finally here”, he sighed, taking in her scent and enjoying the warmth of her body on his. It didn’t matter if it was burning hot outside, and that he was sweaty from the weather, he still wanted her as close as possible for as long as he could.
“Wouldn’t miss it for anything”, she assured. “You have a constructors' championship to celebrate, after all”.
“Don’t get ahead of yourself”, he pulled her to walk towards the lift with him, keeping her secured by his side with a hand on her waist. “I haven’t won anything yet”.
“I’m sure you’re gonna make something magical for me”.
“God, I hope so”, he chuckled. “Your first race! Better make it special”.
“You will. I trust you”.
And what he did on track was amazing. After a couple of terrible race finishes, Lando showed pure dominance at the last race of the season. Securing pole position and carrying it on until the very end, when he won the GP, and even getting the fastest lap for one last time at this round. The perfect race to bring the championship home to McLaren; and Y/N was there to witness it all.
“You stink of champagne”, she pointed out when they were back at his hotel room. Everyone had gone to get ready to party and he definitely needed a shower after getting soaked by his team’s celebration. After all, it’s not every day when you become a constructor champion in Formula 1.
“And I’m definitely a little bit drunk from the podium”, he giggled as he threw his tired body on bed. Lando didn’t care if he was dirty; he just needed a little bit of rest before going back to the outside world. Right at that moment, he was happy to be in the quiet and safeness of his room, in Y/N’s presence.
“But it’s all worthy, isn’t it?”, she asked, getting herself a tiny spot in bed right next to him. She couldn’t help but notice the content smile on his lips, the ‘mission accomplished’ aura. It was like this win had lifted an enormous weight from his shoulders.
“Yeah, it is”, he agreed. “All worth it to make you impressed”.
“I’m always impressed by you”, she shyly replied, keeping her voice low as she got herself distracted with the sequins of her bag, using her fingers to roll them around. 
“I’m glad this is the one you saw live”, he started playing with the sequins as well, but his green eyes quickly found hers as they played together. She could feel the flames on her chest and the heat on her cheeks as he looked into her eyes. It was like he could see past her soul. “Thank you for being here”.
“Thank you for asking me to come”, she shot back. They couldn’t tear their eyes away from each other, and the more they stared, the more confused about their feelings they got. It was already a big incognita in their heads, and surely this rush of emotions weren’t helping them at all. “Won’t you go get ready to celebrate?”
“I just need a minute of quietness”, he explained, now closing his eyes and breaking the contact with Y/N’s for once. She silently sighed in relief and went back to playing with her purse. “The calm after the storm”.
“And before”, she chuckled, making him agree with a grin. “It gets too loud sometimes, right? The media, the fans, the adrenaline…”
“Louder than I'd like to admit”, he chuckled, his eyes flickering towards her once again. “God knows how much they tried painting me as the villain this year. It pisses me off, but… the people that know me will always have my back. And it's good to share moments like this. It's what keeps me grounded. And in the end, it’s all about the people who are there for you when it’s quiet. Like you, right now”.
“You know I'll always have your back. If you ever need someone to hold your hand, I'll be right here”, Y/N stopped playing with her purse and rested her hand on top of his. 
A small moment of silence lingered in the air, but it wasn't awkward at all; it was comfortable. After a while, they learned how to appreciate each other's presence solely and enjoy the quiet. It was in moments like this they truly know what they got by their side.
“You know you're not at all what I thought you would be”, Y/N admitted. “When Pietra said you're an F1 driver, I thought you'd be more… full of yourself. A little bit arrogant. And from the first moment we met, you were humble and you were kind. Not to mention that the past few months have been nothing more than a Lando 101, learning how much of a good person you are. I'm glad I can be vulnerable with you”.
“I'm glad I didn’t meet your first expectations”, they chuckled together. “Honestly, not a lot of people see what you're saying. To everyone, I'm the bad driver that says a lot of shit to the media. But you've seen past all of that”.
A brief silence falls between them both. The atmosphere shifts slightly, the comfortable chatter fading away once again. Y/N zones out for a while, but when she comes back to her senses, Lando is looking at her. His lips are slightly parted, as if he was trying to come up with words to say. But his face is glowing a little bit more than before. The realization had just dawned on him, and after months of being insecure about his own feelings, he simply decided to be honest with her.
Lando swallowed the lump on his throat and his tone got more serious. He looked down to his hands, taking the courage to speak, before looking her in the eyes again.
“I think I’m in love with you. And that scares the shit out of me”.
The words hung in the air, and for a moment, it was like the world outside had gone quiet. Lando paid close attention to her reaction, and all Y/N got to do was gasp and slightly widen her eyes. She didn’t know how to react to this; and most definitely didn't know how to reply to such a confession.
“I know it's mental. I don’t like feeling like I'm rushing in and fucking things up. But it's just… it's just that I've never felt like this before. Like, the past year, I thought I could just have fun, enjoy my youth, focus on my career and so on. But then you came along, and... it’s different with you. You make everything feel… right. And it scares me. I’m not good with this stuff. Not with real feelings”.
Lando was nervous with her response, but the way she squeezed his hands while staying in silence assured him that he didn't fuck everything up.
“Lan, I don't know what to say”, she smiled nervously, flickering her fingers between his and trying to control her breath.
“You don’t have to say anything. I just needed to say it. I don’t think I could keep on pretending like it's nothing. Like being in love with you isn't consuming me”, he admitted. “Every time I leave you, my heart breaks a little bit more. And every time I don’t get to call you mine, it pains me. And I'm scared of how much I love you. Scared I'm not good enough for you. Scared this is rushed in”.
“You don’t have to be scared. You don’t have to have it all figured out right now. But I’m here. I’m listening”, she assured him, hands still firmly holding onto his.
“You're not freaking out?”, he frowned, making her laugh at his reaction before shaking her head no.
“Lando, sometimes I think you think too much into things. You worry too much about what people think of you, and that includes me”, she analyzed. “You think I'm freaking out because I still haven't come up with the right words to say I'm in love with you too”.
He opened that boyish and genuine smile once again, and tried biting it away when he got shy. It was nice to know she felt the same. And it was even nicer to know he found someone to be truly vulnerable with.
“I've never been good at letting someone in, and I most definitely have some problems with self doubt. But you, Y/N, somehow made it easier. You understand me. And I'm happy to have found someone that sees right through me. I hope I can be at least 10% of that for you someday”.
Y/N didn’t even notice that she was leaning into him, or that she was now playing with the collar of his shirt. Lando was so close, to the point that she could smell the champagne on his breath, and it was intoxicating. It felt amazing to be seen by him.
“Lan, you understand me more than you think. And you have more impact on me than you can imagine”, she chuckled shyly. “We don't need to have it all figured out right away. I just want to be here. With you”.
Her eyes flickered up to his once again, then rolled back to his lips, only to come up again. His gaze softened as he observed her from up close, and automatically, his hand moved up to brush over her cheek. Than, almost in a whisper, he said:
“You’re incredible, you know that? I’ve been waiting for the right moment to say this, but… I don’t want to wait anymore”.
And without another word, Lando leaned forward, his lips gently brushing against hers. He started as a soft kiss, testing the waters and making sure she's comfortable with it. But when Y/N didn’t pull away, he brought her closer and deepened the kiss. His movements became more certain, more desperate. The world around them disappeared, and the only thing that truly mattered was each other. A moment they have been waiting for so long, finally happening.
When he pulled away, Y/N chased his lips, making him smirk now knowing the control he has over her body. Then, as a reward, he pressed a few more pecks before completely stopping to admire her face. His thumbs rubbed circles on her cheek and he looked between her eyes with a huge smile on face.
“I should've done this sooner”, he admitted. “Would've been amazing to have kissed you all those months ago back in Ibiza”.
“To be totally honest, I was kind of disappointed you didn't kiss me that night”, she revealed, making him arch his brows. “I thought you were the cutest boy from the very beginning”.
“Everything happens for a reason, Y/N. If I had kissed you on that trip, maybe we wouldn't be here today”.
“I guess you're right”, she sighed and he gently kissed her again.
“I love you”, he mumbled against her lips.
“I love you too”, she says back, pulling him for another kiss. “But you still stink of champagne. I think you need a shower so we can properly celebrate your win tonight”.
“Alright, bossy”, he joked before pressing a kiss on top of her head.
And just before he closed the bathroom door, he leaned back and smiled again. Lando didn’t say anything, but just admired her one more time before going into the shower. Sometimes his life feels surreal; and tonight, having the girl of his dreams all to himself, it felt more like something designed straight out of his dream.
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ladybyakuya · 7 months ago
Text
IS WHAT LOVE IS ? | GEN NARUMI.
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+cw.— omegaverse au ( alpha!male x beta!reader ) + roommates au + college / university au, gen narumi x f!reader, fast burn ( we don't appreciate it enough ), world building, angst & hurt, smut, mentions of alcohol, bullying, blood and physical injuries.
+syn.— When college got busy with upcoming internships, classes became hectic, sleep schedule got fucked up and exam stress piled on: gen narumi sought blissful comfort in your presence. However, the same can not be said about you.
+wc. —5k ( dw I think I'll often talk about this in my main.) 
+playlist. — affection by between friends \ no love in L.A by dutch melrose \ fire by jvke \ is this what love is by wasia project.
+notes. — one of my favourite things to get things done by challenging myself so please be kind to me if you feel my writing is little off or not fitting my general pattern. thank you, enjoy reading. | redirect to blog navigation.
+tags. — into the omegaverse collab by @goxjo + other tags : @sukirichi @to-eden @stunie @interstellar-inn
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[ one. ]
"We should fuck,"  Narumi announces walking into the dorm room half-clad in the towel and boxers freshly showered, clusters of hair falling onto his face, wet and aromatic opening the door with a bang. Still, it failed to startle you like it generally does. His arm is still holding the door open as you try immersing yourself more into the university website that is spread open on your laptop attracting a fair amount of attention. A barely visible deft amongst his eyebrows arises as his presence remains unbeknownst to you even after he clears his throat. Are beta's senses that dull? 
You take the bluetooth earphones off your ears. "Did you say something?" you pose the question as if you are aware of his presence just now. 
Letting his fingers skim through his wet hair he grumbles, "We should fuck," with pinnable irritation in his voice not that you would know why he is being cranky. 
It is your turn to be silent. Your eyes switch over to the calendar hanging on the wall right beside him. It is still two weeks for Gen before he starts to show the bare minimum signs of an approaching rut. Besides, he has never been this ridiculous. "Did the summer heat finally take your sanity?" you exclaim with a scoff returning the annoyance right back at him but respectable enough to look at him as you spoke. Your phone chimes followed by a vibration and Narumi is forced to cover one of his ears with the arm that has been holding the door all the while; his other ear suffers the damage.
"How many times did I tell you to tone it down a few notches?" He gets inside finally closing the door. All you could spare for response is nothing but a glance of unease. Who is he to tell you what to do and what not? You put your notebooks and a few things in your bag as his whistle finally blows off. "It's been two years already. when are you going to finally give in to my alpha charms, huh? I know that you are no strangers to the modern ideas of mating. I mean you are quite active so why don't we just celebrate the last year of graduation being fuck buddies rather than just roommates?"  You roll your eyes when you are still facing his back to him. You turn around to tuck your hair behind your ears making the bluetooth earphones visible. Holding up your fisted right wrist in his direction you tap on the watch two times and fist out your palm with all five fingers and Narumi just squits his eyes. Before he could make full sense of what you are conveying, you are already out of the door and Narumi knows better than anyone that you love listening to music at high volumes without interruption. Maybe you do so because you are a beta or you are sad or annoyed about something. It couldn't be him, could it? Sometimes when the surroundings get too quiet and you are listening to music he can hear what song it is. 
Not that he is a fan of your music taste but he has rather expressed in preposterous ways to exhibit his distaste for your tastes, likes, and dislikes, sometimes even unasked for one and you were fine with it. You were fine with his obnoxious, rude, and rough behavior. Even in his class, he has a hard time getting along with his batchmates. Every once in a while he would come up with bloody knuckles or a bleeding nose, scratches in his face sometimes and you would have no other choice but to tend to his wounds. You never bothered to ask how he got hurt or why he hurt others and he never decided to divulge. Being at the top of the university has prevented him from getting expelled. The professors are fed up with him but are willing to put up with him only because he is sincere in his studies. And, he is surprisingly good at it given his nature. Sharing a room for almost more than two years with an alpha like Gen Narumi is not a cakewalk, especially for a beta like you. Even before moving into the dorm room, you knew that you would either be paired with an omega or an alpha. You knew what you were getting into and with the advancement of medicinal chemistry cohabitation with other species of your kind has become easier than before yet the primal urges never really fade, do they? After all, what is more dangerous than an unmated alpha? 
You check the time. You are so early for someone who has an interview for the first time. You sit with the other candidates without a slice of panic in your body. Thanks to Gen for nuking your attention into something that you would never expect in nightmares or another universe. Like what the fuck was that? What kind of question was that? Was that even a question? As for a fact, an alpha's desire is too innate to ignore. And with the amount of patience stored in Gen Narumi's body if anything was possible it would have happened in the first few months of college year. Wait a minute! is he finally asking you out after trying to hide it for almost two years? If yes, that would certainly explain why one time he gave you cologne on your birthday which would complement his scent too. Not only that, it would surely explain how he snuggles to you during movie nights, or on liquid nights he would almost spoon you when his ruts were approaching he was too broke to buy video games. But at the same time, you can not completely claim those actions as an act of pursuit of seeking a potential mate in you since it was just an extremely rare occurrence. 
You remember the time when both of you just came from an exam semester party being too drunk, high, and happy to change or freshen up. Both of you just passed out on the nearest bed to the door of the room and you swear you felt a graze of something sharp upon the nook of your neck. But you swiped that thought at the back of your mind thinking it as a dream or some bad alcoholic effect. That night you woke up with Narumi in your bed sleeping like a log, a loud log to be specific. You have always given him space during his ruts since it works better that way; rather than arguing to come to a truce. That's how you have always been. That's how betas had to be. You would always find him buried under a futon with bloodshot with a game controller in his hand, and a lot of junk food packets all around the room yet you chose to give him space because that is how you avoid alphas like him; the more you indulge with him, the greater the chances to be under his target radar. 
"Y/N L/N is next. Be prepared." the mic announces breaking the pensive silence and your reverie of thoughts for a mere blinking moment.
On the first day when you moved in you clearly stated that you would file a complaint if he ever tried to scent you, mark you during his ruts. He just joked saying, "So, it's okay when I'm not in a rut?" but you would not budge or answer him so he mentioned in a sing-songy tone, "Oh don't worry. Betas are hard to influence. You should know that darling.  Plus, you are not exactly my type." with a smug so loud on his face that you wished you could throw something at his face but engaging with him would give him a crack to widen the gulf, explore and test waters. . .you know better than that. But since unlike other alphas, he listened to it, he abided by it, he sustained it—- well tried to or he was just poking the bear for fun. He often does that when he is out of video games. 
That is how you have always maintained a boundary between him and you. 
Gen Narumi finds it impenetrable. You think all the things he does, he does it out of respect which is not exactly true. There is respect but just a pinch. Sharing a room with a beta wouldn't be too bad. That's what he thought when he came to know about you. He did mention in his admission form that he would not like an omega as his roommate but he did not expect it to be beta. It could have been an alpha or a zeta, someone either loud or too mute. Mediocrity has always been a foreign concept to him. And what's up with "do not scent me or mark me." as if he would be interested in such things. He is not like other alphas. Some alphas spend their ruts giving in to their urges while some take suppressants. Gen Narumi belongs to neither of them. He spends his ruts eating junk and playing video games. works both ways actually. It has always been like that since he was expressed as alpha in society. What would he do to a beta? or that's what he thought. 
This morning when he said, well, suggested that you and him should fuck he was possessed perhaps. Why on earth would he say that? It does not make any sense because never in two years he has thought or even looked at you with a splotch of romance. Most of the alphas in his batch have already found a mate or maybe were forced to. He might be the only unmated alpha in this university which is why lesser potential omegas approach him. An unmated alpha is always seen under the lens of threat. And, if they came to know how he spends his ruts, they would not even acknowledge him as an alpha. At the start of the college year, he would often end up bullied by other alphas because of that. The last thing he wants to do is to use his pheromones on others. Why would he waste it on others? He doesn't exactly know for what or whom he is saving it. He would come to the room late whenever he got into a fight. One time he was so tired of all the bullying that he did not even try to defend himself or scare them away. By the time he reached the dorm room,  he was too hurt to breathe properly. That night Gen Narumi came to know that even a beta can calm an alpha, and nurse them into good health if needed. He was too hurt to protest or say anything, all he could do was to imbibe your scent while you were taking care of him. Even betas have a smell. Did you do that on purpose? release pheromonic signals to calm him? Would it be so hard to believe if he were to say that most alphas took their roommates as mates? He can certainly try, at the very least he will get a good laugh out of your reaction. If you did that on purpose he has a chance to show other alphas that he is actually an alpha not that he cares what they say but since you showed your interest in him in a puzzled way he would certainly try to match your level. wouldn't this be a win-win situation if he fucked you? For you, for him, and others as well; it certainly would. That's right. This morning you did not pay enough attention to him so he will say it again just so he can reject you. That's what an exceptional alpha would do. He is exceptionally good at gaming and studies though so he can not see why he should let this opportunity slip through his hands like sand.
You open the door with the help of keys while holding your bag in one hand and your cell phone in the other. Gen does not leave his seat to hold the door rather graces you a glance and goes back to whatever he is doing. 
“Yeah. I’ll definitely call you back, Hoshina-san.” you disconnect the call and Gen’s eyes are on you. He does not look away so you took it as a cue to explain something, anything. He just needs some info to be fed so that he does not start again. “Hoshina Soshiro is gonna be my supervisor if I get the job. The interview wasn’t so bad but I don’t wanna get my hopes up. He is one of the best and doing an internship under his guidance would be a great start. ”
“Stay away from that guy,” Gen grumbles looking back at his desk. It is unusually neat today. Not to mention his futon bed is folded and kept on his bed in a side enough that one can sleep peacefully without any problem. You would have said something to him if your attention did not keep faltering . . .Gen rolls his revolving chair in your direction, one of his legs is touching the wheels of the chair while the other is stretched creating a huge gap. His left-hand travels under his t-shirt and it hooks on his right shoulder.  "we should fuck," he declares, inept and inert.
"oh god! Not again" you let out a groan and sit on the bed near to you. Your head is in hands not because of what he said or what he did, not even because your patience is thinning with each tick of the clock enough to not to put up with this anymore but because of what is about to come out of his mouth the next.
"So, you heard me the first time ?" he barks while leaving his chair. You just wave your hand nonchalantly in a gesture to dismiss him but he locks his hands in his chest taking a stern stance in front of you.
You tilt up your head looking him in the eye, "You know Gen we shouldn't do this," your elbows rest on your thighs as you start to scratch your index finger with the other.
"don't you mean can't? you can't do this?" Is he serious? Isn’t he joking? Oh God. Why isn’t he joking like he generally does? Maybe a reaction would keep him quiet but what kind? A yes? A no? Or a laugh?
"you know better than others that I can fuck, literally too sometimes." You exclaim hoping to judge if this is really serious or just some sort of prank. If the latter, then it's not funny. If the former, then you might have to consider moving out. You get up from his bed to grab towels and bathroom needs."Why do you ask?"
"I don't know. Maybe I need to prove to someone that I'm an alpha." Gen regrets saying that. Your hands have stopped as you look at him which rarely happens. You never do one thing at a time. Fuck! You’re still looking at him. Gen unlocks one of his hands and scratches his jaw. 
"well, you chose a very wrong person to fuck, to prove then. I despise alphas. I would be much happier if you weren't one," That’s a little harsh, even from you. 
"as if a beta like you could get me hard." You keep the shampoo and conditioner bottle on the desk with much greater force than needed. Here it comes. . .Oh okay.
"Well, have you been with Beta before?" Gen tries to dodge the bullet because this is not the direction of conversation he wants to go. "that's exactly my point-" 
"an omega?" you pause and take a few steps towards him "An alpha?"  
“Wha—t? What’re — you talking — about?” Gen blabbers. He does not step away as you come closer but he has the urge to do so.
"god. Please find someone else to lose your virginity." You turn around the moment you finish deciphering his goal. Gen starts to growl underneath everything that comes out of his mouth now. "me being an alpha won't affect you being a beta if we were to fuck. and I don't wanna hurt an omega or alpha—His patience is thinning out too. This really isn’t the way he wanted this to go.
"But you'd hurt me?"
"That's not what I meant,"
"Are you a virgin, Gen Narumi?"
"Yes—I mean no." He glitches and now he can not look at you.
"Which is it?"
". . ." 
"I'm too tired to think about it now," you express with an exasperated sigh walking towards the bathroom.
"Is that a yes?"
"maybe be,"
"forget it." His tone is too sharp, demanding for someone who was begging you to fuck.
"What?" You stop before entering the bathroom and turn your head to him. "forget it" He repeats. You tilt your head, "But you just said. . ." you are starting to understand what this is really about. He does not want to fuck you neither want to lose his virginity or whatever he is trying to protect. It is his alpha ego acting up. He wants you to say yes so that he can reject you so that it strokes his alpha-nature. That’s it.
Your face distorts in disdain in his dense thought process.
Gen Narumi squints his eyes and then blinks. When he opens his eyes you are in front of him. You push him onto the nearest bed, your bed, and sit on his lap, legs folded and creating a dip on the mattress under the pressure of it, thighs grazing his pelvis.
"what're you doing?" Gen gasps as you let your palms touch his chest. He is gonna explode. His heart is beating so fast. You can feel it. Oh My God. You didn’t think this through.
"Well, let's see if a beta can get you hard or not." 
You undress your top. You are not an omega. There is no stench. But your scent is so muted that he has to either influence you to emit some or get closer to inhale. The first option is a no-no because he would not like to anger you while you are on his lap. So, he has to get closer. Wait, closer than this? The smell from that night threatens his senses and memory. Before the realization fully hits his brain, his hand moves in your direction but you stop him. Did you do something wrong? Both hands are now aligned with his. You notice how your hands are different from his. His fingers are rough and raw. Yours are at least, well-maintained. You slowly interlace his fingers with yours folding his hands at the back. He could easily swat you away but he is not doing that. You lean into his face and he does not move away so you take that as a yes to lick from his collarbones up to his chin and immediately pull away. 
Narumi’s eyes are closed, head still tilted. Without giving him a moment of reprieve you let your lips graze on his, just barely, and pull away just a little, wet yours and thereby skimming at his bottom lip in the process. He opens his eyes, slowly looks at you, and then your lips. He is breathing like a tired puppy. He inclines, perhaps for a kiss but you sway your head giving him access to the side of your neck. As you graze your cheek against his jaw, his hands that are still at the back are held by you but it is slowly getting lithe as you feel his lips on your shoulders, hot tongue on your skin, and then a sharp graze of his fang from your shoulder up to the back of your ear. You tip your head down for a moment feeling goosebumps arise on your skin barely allowing him any moments of reprieve, only permitting a rare moment to breathe. You watch Narumi intently, unafraid to make things awkward, but Narumi is too distracted by his inner crisis to notice the amused stare mere centimeters from his face; studying him.
The tip of your tongue curls slowly but forcefully, tracing the plump of your bottom lip before sliding across Gen’s own and trailing the roof of his mouth. Eyes watching intently. Controlled. Curious. Amused. But then you abruptly pull away, lips shiny and wet. Before Narumi can ask why, your lips curl in on themselves, hiding a smug smile. It looks like you can’t catch your breath — like if you do, you will erupt into laughter. But a lopsided grin finally breaks free, tugging at your lips, when your eyes flash down to Narumi’s torso and back up.
Narumi freezes, heart, hammering in his ribs.
He’s hard.
“That was fast,” You smirk — and you stand. “I’m going to shower now.” you release your grip from his hands and get off his lap.  Gen watches you go into the bathroom and looks down at his boner biting his bottom lip; a click of his tongue follows as he checks the time. It is too late to go out now.
when you come out of the shower he is not there. A part of you worries if he got into a fight or something or maybe he is with his big hot alpha friends bragging about how he turned you down. You hit the bed with a thud, exhaustion creeping up from your toe to head, slowly. You do not give a damn what he says about you to other alphas or anyone in general. A beta will always have to watch out for themselves. They can not rely upon anyone, not even their kind because most betas are dumb enough to mingle with alphas and get turned into omega with or without consent.
Look what fate landed upon your mother when she took an alpha as her mate. You let out a wry chuckle. Sleep seems like a foreign land somewhere in heaven.
[ two. ]
It has been two days since Narumi left. Some of his batchmates have started to ask you during recess and breaks between classes. You answered them the same thing every time. “I don’t know.” or “he didn’t tell me before going.” or “How should I know? I’m not his mate who can sense it. Go find his mate.” or “he didn’t take his phone. So I don’t know.” truly it had not bothered you until Professor Shinomiya showed up at your doorstep asking for his whereabouts. You politely and patiently answered him the same very thing that you have been telling anyone who asked about Narumi. For a hated unmated alpha he sure is popular.
On the third day, late at night, there is a knock on your door. You go and open without hesitation. Narumi enters wearing the same clothing he wore the last time you saw him, only a little fade. His hair is wet and it is not raining outside so he comes back after going missing for two days, freshly showered. Bloodshot eyes, hair messed up, and mayhem all over his body.
“Welcome back.” You say but Gen does not say anything but goes straight to his study desk. He has a test coming up. Professor Shinimiya said that so you would contact him if you had the means. Your day-to-day notebook is on his study table, under the stack of his books, and guess what? That is exactly what you need the most right now because without it you would not be able to work on your applications and resumes. It has all the details and info you. The moment you touch the stack of books, Narumi’s hands are over yours.
“Are you—-? Where were you ?” You ask and For the first time in your life, you feel that something inside you went missing. When did that happen?
Gen stands up but you do not scoot away as he closes the gap between him and you. That’s what he likes about you. You were never afraid of him. You never considered him as a threat like others. Now, that he is closer you can smell several mixes of strong musky aromas. It is odd. You have been close to him before, but never once knew his scent. Is he in a rut?  Or did something bad happen? Did he. . .? Was he attacked by a gang of omegas or alphas? It makes your stomach turn thinking about whatever the probable reason for such a state as his. 
“Oh? You can tell?” There is a few inches gap between his face and yours. His palm is still intact on yours. The grip is lithe yet you don’t move your hand away.
“Gen? What? OH. God.” You had to swallow since tears threatened your eyes. “Are you okay?” A trembling whisper is all it takes for him to finally say something.
“Leave.”
“What?”
“Just leave for a few days. Go to some friend’s house or something,” He is still sitting, his eyes are on the open book now but his hand is still over yours.
“Why? What did I do?” You ask trying to move away your hand but in a swift moment, he grabs your wrist and pulls you closer as he stands up. 
“I’m — in a rut. So, I need you to stay away from me.”
“But — I’m a beta. You don’t need to worry.”
That is funny. It is because of you that he is such a shipwreck now. It was your pheromones that fucked him up. It was you who calmed him with scents when he came home injured. It was you who had no control over pheromones when drunk. It was you all along and despite that, he can not bring himself to hate you. Why can’t he hate you when he wants to? He even took a whole bunch of suprresants before coming back here. Gen laughs at your naive sentiment so blaring that you take a few steps back but he yanks you back to himself, a little too forceful than he intended to be resulting in you on top of him sprawled on the cold floor.
“Ohh? Why do you think I rub my fangs against your neck? You don’t think I do that for fun, do you?” You are still trying to get away from his grip but he is strong. He is stronger than you have known all these two years. “Are you too dumb to know that if I bite and knot you enough times you will turn into an o—
Thwack!
Narumi’s head is tilted away from yours. The exposed side of his cheek is red, his ears are thrumming and he has to force himself to keep his eyes open. Fuck. You’re strong. That was one hell of a slap.
“I know that. I’ve known that all my life. You don’t need to tell me that,” you yell looking down at his t-shirt. A cry is at the brink when you see a few drops of water fall on his top.  You try your best not to fall apart in front of him but it is just too much. Hearing such a thing what your mother went through and then slowly becoming a victim of it is nothing but a slow poison. You refuse to live the life your mother led. You refuse to owe your existence to an alpha. 
Narumi’s lips form a crescent but it is quickly clouded when your body starts to shake. You cover your face as you start to crumble like Rome in front of him. 
Folding his legs he sits up. His hands rest on the floor to support himself as he whispers, “Hey, stop crying.”  His voice is calm, pupils back to normal, not red anymore. “Please” He insists. “I’d hate to use my pheromones on you, especially now” 
You slowly look up wiping off your tears with your hand.
“Tell me y/n have I ever used my pheromones on you?” 
“No. Never.” Your hands fall on his chest. “But I still hate you. Why would you say something like that?” You stifle a sob and continue. “I know. I’ve never opened up to you—-” Your voice turns up, anger laced underneath. “But never did you. You think I don’t know—- that alphas bully you? Oh please! I know better than anyone what an alpha’s beating looks like.” You inhale a long breath, “I mean I have known that my entire life. I’ve seen my mother all my life— and I can’t see someone else getting hurt because of me . . . your voice breaks into a cry again and you inhale so as not to cry anymore but what good that would do now that he has seen the core of vulnerability in you that was tucked inside carefully with layer upon layer.
“Well,” Narumi starts to speak. “Save me then. Save me from this torment.”
“What?”
“You heard me.” Narumi jocks down to meet your gaze. “Be my God and I will be your devotee.”
You try to get on your feet. Gen’s eyes follow you, each of your movements until you are standing on your own. He is still sitting on the floor in the same stance, laid back and amused.  He is sure you will say no. He has done this before. Back then you thought he was speaking out of delirium but that night when you saved his life he felt like he found a God to worship. He remembers saying, “I think I love you, Y/N L/N.” and you scoffed at him saying in no world an alpha like you would feel that about a beta like you when there is a bevy of omegas around him.
“Okay.” You murmur.
Gen’s mouth is parted. His eyes are big in surprise. “But just so you know, I’m hard to please,” you mumble with a sniff getting out of the room to make a call.
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tteokdoroki · 1 year ago
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⋆ 𝜗𝜚 ˚⟡. — KATSUKU BAKUGOU. homemade love.
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about. katsuki takes the pain of his middle-born daughter to heart, and does anything he can to fix it.
warnings. minors, blank and ageless blogs do not interact! sfw, fluff, characters aged up, bakugou is a girl dad of three, reader is referred to as ‘ma’, their daughter is quirkless like deku lol, he makes her pasta, pro hero!bakugou, fem!reader, … a draft from a long time ago!! enjoy please <3
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katsuki who cooks and makes his middle daughter her favourite pasta recipe whenever she’s down.
she comes home from middle school with scraped palms and knees, teary eyed and with the weight of the world on her shoulders.
“they don’t like me ‘cause ‘m quirkless.” she says as soon as she’s through the door — the authentic bakugou twang thick in her shaky voice. her face is pressed into your torso when you make eye contact with katsuki, who’s emerged from the kitchen down the hall and to your left.
you see it all flash before his eyes — his childhood, his high school career and the day he died. the way he treated the number one, uncle izuku, for so many years. it’s all reflected in the familiar red of his middle child’s eyes and it kills him.
“c’mere squirt,” katsuki calls to her, drying off his hands with the red riot tea towel slung lazily over his shoulder. he’d been washing dishes before she got home. “we’re makin’ dinner together.”
“but i—“
“i wasn’t askin’, i was tellin’.” the older blonde nudges his head towards the kitchen, reaching a hand out for his daughter which she tenderly takes. when she sniffles, bakugou tucks her into his side as if to protect her from the horrors of the world. you let them go without interrupting, knowing the importance of this moment for the two.
it’s not easy, being a bakugou when you’ve got dynamight’s reputation to live up to. he’s fearsome and fiery, confident and calculated. your husband and the father of your three beautiful daughters is one of the main reasons why japan is safe today. the burden and weight of his reputation that your children carry is unimaginable — only made worse by the fact that your middle is quirkless.
and yet, dynamight’s love for her doesn’t falter. since the moment he first held his baby girl she’s been his entire world, his moon along with his sun and now his stars. he’s adored her before she even became a twinkle in his eye — no amount of power or special ability would change that for him.
she’s katsuki’s girl, not just dynamight’s daughter. he’d tear the world apart to find anyone who ever hurt her.
“hold the knife properly. you cut your finger off ‘n yer ma will have my head.” his gruff voice, holding no malice, makes your sweet girl snort with laughter — a change from her earlier wobbly bottom lip and teary eyes. “we’re tryna mince garlic for the sauce, not yer little hands, squirt.”
she sticks her tongue out at him, bright blonde curls bouncing when she narrowly misses a playful swat from her father. “i’m trying,” your middle child wails with faux upset — her nose scrunches all too similarly to how yours and it sends an arrow of love straight through katsuki’s chest. for a moment, the kitchen falls to silence and the elder of the two turns his attention to the pasta dough in his large floured hands — focusing on shaping them into little bow ties just how his daughter likes, on occasion adding them to a boiling pot of water.
“i’m trying,” she says again, but quieter. “but daddy, everythin’s so hard.”
and like pot simmering away on the stove, her emotions start to boil over — tiny hiccups forming a sad symphony with the sounds of a working kitchen.
bakugou instantly springs into dad mode, dropping everything that he had been doing to take your daughter’s hand in his. despite how messy it may be. “hey now gorgeous, don’t cry…tell me what’s wrong, yeah?”
“i-i don’t want to disappoint you by not havin’ a quirk n not bein’ a hero…” she manages to get out through her blubbering — digging the heal of her palm into wet eyes. “i jus’ wanna make you proud!”
katsuki’s face softens, everything except for love for his daughter melting away. “‘nd i am proud. fiercely fuckin’ so…ah, shit, don’t tell yer ma i cursed, kay?” he stumbles over his words, he’s never been the best at comforting people but when bakugou’s child needs him, he’ll be damned if he leaves her in any pain. “from the moment y’first came into this shitty — i mean — crappy world, i’ve been proud of you. you’ve always pushed yourself beyond anythin’ i could achieve, you’re kind to people when they don’t deserve it, you smile whenever things get tough…”
taking a moment from his passionate rant, katsuki slows his breathing and composed himself — squeezing his little girl close. “yer the best thing that’s ever happened t’me ‘n yer ma. my proudest moment… i love ya so much. you’d never disappoint me.”
“really, daddy?” your baby sniffles, rubbing at her snotty nose.
bakugou nods with a gentle smile, cupping her face between his two floury hands before kissing her forehead z “really.” he affirms. “now get yer choppin’ skills together, this pasta sauce ain’t gonna make itself.”
the two blonde’s return to cooking, a comfortable silence settling in your family kitchen, also full of love. that night, your family of five sit together munching on homemade pasta bow ties in a sauce that your middle daughter had worked so hard to make. she grins brightly between her sisters, staring at her father with her shining red eyes thankfully.
in that moment, she knows that she is loved no matter what the status of her quirk is.
you link your fingers with bakugou’s under the table. “you did good, dad.” you whisper to him, stabbing through your pasta with your fork. “
“so did you, ma.” he whispers back gruffly, thumb running over your wedding band as he eats his pasta too.
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꒰ end. — all rights reserved © tteokdoroki 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
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potatomountain · 3 months ago
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Alien In My Living Room
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Pairing: Alien!Hongjoong x fem reader x neighbor Cowboy! San Summary: After inheriting your farm it's been a struggle- not as much as the alien that crashed there and has been a little menace for some time. A big enough menace your neighbor (and crush) come over at the wrong time- or maybe the right time. WC: 4k AU: cowboy vs alien! hentai Genre: pwp, scifi Warning(s): 18+ rating, eggpreg, breeding kink, tentacles, weird bodily anomalies. rainbowish cum, restraints, some slight predator/prey dynamics if you squint. threesome. double penetration, anal (male/female receiving) Betas: @bunnliix ~ @adelusionforyourthoughts ~ @yourfatherlucifer AN: Happy birthday to the LOML Kim Hongjoong! And also a happy birthday to one of my favorite fanfic writers @sanjoongie !! You can probably guess what bits were thrown in just for you! ps: I kinda got the idea from the song "Llama in my Living Room" by AronChupa! dividers and Banner by me! Ageless blogs that interact with this piece, even a like, will be blocked INSTANTLY, no exceptions.
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The worst part of being a city girl from a farm was when the farm became yours. Still a year into owning and living back on your family’s farm and you still had no idea what to do with all the land. Your neighbors handled the last harvest, and you debated selling more of the land to them and mostly keeping the ranch house. Of course you knew how to take care of the land, you grew up doing so, but you weren’t sure if you wanted to spend your adult life doing it either.
But that hadn’t been a problem for the last couple of months. Instead your biggest concern was what the fuck you were going to do about the Alien that had taken up residence on your land. He looked human enough, but not at first. His pretty face didn’t erase the being you knew was under there, more limbs than torso, the translucent pink his hair currently was. How he had molded into a man that looked like one of the idols on your posters was beyond you. Though you supposed it wasn’t a complete transformation, as you learned the one time you saw him shirtless. If you ignored that, he was pretty to look at.
But he was also annoying.
“Are you ever going to fix your stupid ship and get out of here?” You snapped out, swiveling in your desk chair to glare at the being who was currently harassing your cat, again. Why your cat stood for it and didn’t hiss was beyond you, weren’t they good predators? Salem managed to slip out of Hongjoong’s hands, running for one of the many hidey holes he had around your home. Hongjoong looked up from the floor with wide blue eyes, the stars themselves shining in his irises. “I thought you liked having me around here?” “You’re terrorizing my adorable kitten and you’re out there at ungodly hours banging and causing a ruckus! Why would I like that?” You huffed out again, crossing your arms over your chest. “And for a creature that doesn’t eat, you sure like to eat all my food!” “I’m sorry- I need energy and I can’t get it my usual ways.” He protested, crawling over to you in such a clumsy way you wondered how this could be a being capable of space travel.
You frowned, lifting your leg to press your heel into his shoulder and stop him from getting too close. “What do you mean- that sounds awfully sus.” “Sus?” “Suspicious. Jesus, you managed to learn how to blend in so well but you can’t manage the lingo?” You rolled your eyes, still unsure how he managed to adapt so effortlessly. He never gave you an explanation, just transformed fully into this and within a few days he was talking like he had lived on earth his whole life- minus missing many social cues. “Anyways, I thought you didn’t need to eat so why do you need the extra energy now?” Hongjoong was still pressing forward, something different in his eyes that made you apprehensive. Maybe you shouldn’t have asked the question. 
The sudden appearance of one of his nearly translucent tentacles sliding up your leg sent off warning bells in your head. It pushed up the fabric of your sweatpants, leaving behind a little bit of slick that darkened the light gray fabric. Was it supposed to be wet? “I need the extra energy to produce and lay my eggs… you’re really warm actually.” The words came out like a lustful purr, furthering your panic. Quickly you slapped the tentacle aside, watching him wince as you stood up and put distance between you. “Sorry for asking, this is super interesting stuff but I uh- gotta go catch my fridge.” You mentally slapped yourself for the stupid excuse, but hoped he would buy it as you rushed out of your office.
He hadn’t been flirting with you had he? Hadn’t implied to fuck his eggs into you… that’s what you told yourself. Yet the idea was now in your head, as was the question if he even had a dick or would he use-
The train of thought had your body reacting, which just concerned you even more. He was an alien! Why couldn’t you have dirty thoughts about your neighbor instead? The mental reminder of the cowboy next door just had your cheeks even more heated, slapping them in an attempt to control yourself. Why were you suddenly so damn horny? You really needed the fresh air, booking it towards your kitchen and back patio.
However, you didn’t make it through the living room before you were tackled to the couch, bent over the arm and face in the cushions. You hadn’t even heard him following you, but now you could feel him pressing down against your back, his heavy pants so obvious as he leaned over your body close enough you could feel his breath on the back of your neck. “Sorry Star, but you ran away smelling so good. Humans like consent, right?” He sounded quite worked up, touching you in several ways that was making your mind fuzzy with heat. His hands pushed up your shirt, but there were several tentacles touching your skin. They were warm and slick, slithering over your flesh.
You realized you enjoyed how they felt, skin feeling hotter where the slick remained, almost sensitive. “W-we do. Hongjoong, what do you normally do with your eggs?” “Incubator on ship…” He panted out, his hands now pinning your arms to the cushion above you. “It broke when I crashed, don’t have the parts to fix it. Keep them safe until I return home to gift… but I can't wait.”
Biting down on your lip as the tips of his tentacles rubbed at your nipples under your bra- which you don’t remember getting pushed up - you tried to turn your head to look at him, just to have your breath catching in your throat at his needy expression. You could really see the stars in the blue of his eyes, no white in sight. His tongue lulled out, the same translucent pastels as the tentacles roaming your body. He was losing his human visage, but in the slightest ways, even the pale pink of his hair seemed almost otherworldly with how it fell in his face.
You should tell him off, knowing that the pleading look he gave you was your consent. As annoying as the creature was, he was not unbearable or disrespectful, changing any errors he made to suit your tastes. It was that knowledge that had you caving in. Within seconds of your nod your clothes were gone, bra and panties in particular ripped off you as you were put in such a lewd position but you couldn’t find the time to feel ashamed. Not when the warm slick of one of his appendages was rubbing between your slick folds, teasing you, while the rest sought out sensitive bits and toyed with them. They sucked on your nipples, rubbing around your throat and adding pleasure that made your head spin. Hongjoong let out a particularly pornagraphic moan just behind you that just added to the haze you were beginning to drown in. “Oh you like that?” He chuckled before moaning louder, moaning your name, which had your body reacting. The shiver that coursed through you had your back arching in response, pushing your behinds back against him. You wanted more.
He happily gave you more, pushing the tentacle into you with an inhuman cry of his own. It almost sounded eerie, probably did, but you lust-addled mind didn’t register at such. It did register another male calling your name in a panic, and your kitchen door slamming open. 
You looked up in time to see your friendly neighbor, once childhood friend, standing in the archway of your living room, beautiful sun kissed skin almost pale from the shock that the visage of Hongjoong probably presented. There were at least four tentacles on your body at the moment, and you couldn’t see how many more he had out, but enough to really shock the muscle man as he passed out, falling to the ground.
“San?” You attempted to pull away from Hongjoong, concerned for the man that laid on your wooden floor. His cowboy hat had fallen off, a thin layer of sweat coating his forehead and skin exposed under the vest. You were a lot less concerned than you should be, instead finding him quite delectable, almost like you wanted to jump onto his cock. The harsh way Hongjoong shoved his tentacle deeper into your cunt distracted you from those thoughts. “Pay attention to me Star, I’m the one fucking you.” He growled out, his hold on you tightening all over possessively. Gone was the needy being from a moment ago, Hongjoong was now completely in charge with the way you were lifted up off the couch and displayed in the air. He turned you to watch him, his own clothes coming off. He still had the shape of a human, even a cock you noticed, but the colors of his tentacles now moved over his skin like a work of art.
It was hypnotizing. “Hongjoong~” You whined out, glancing down as best you could to take in the sight of just how he was fucking you. Like straight out of a hentail, the sensations were almost too much.
It was his thumb on your clit that drove you over the edge, rubbing it in perfect stimulating circles that you cried out, creaming all over the slimy tendril. Hongjoong’s head rolled back, his body practically vibrating and you wondered how good it must feel to him for him to look so blissed out.
You didn’t get a chance to ask, falling to the couch the next second as Hongjoong was tackled to the floor by your neighbor. In the struggle he had let go of you completely, the wind knocked out of you from your fall, but some sense knocked into you as well. Still catching your breath you scrambled up, unsure just where to insert yourself in the mess of limbs flying about. “San! Hongjoong! Stop it!” You couldn’t really blame San for freaking out, since Hongjoong was an alien just casually in your living room. Casually fucking you, but making sounds that could be misconstrued.
San halted his fist, sitting on top of the being that had most of his other limbs restrained with his own. “But Miss he-” “He’s a friend San, alien or not.” You huffed out, bending down next to them and fixing Hongjoong with a stare. “And you won’t harm him either.” “But you were thinking about him fucking you! While I was inside you, it’s not fair!” He actually pouted, which was almost funny.
You were too embarrassed to laugh, San turning his attention to you. How could you not want to fuck him though? Toned cowboy, a real gentleman that had been helping you with the farm- even now in dusty jeans and a leather vest, hair tossled from when his hat fell off, he was fine as fuck. “Have you really not been noticing the way I eye fuck you when I ask your help for any manual labor?” “I… didn’t want to get my hopes up-” San mumbled out, just to get flipped over suddenly, Hongjoong holding him down. “Hey!!” “She’s mine human- back off!” “Like hell I will. You don’t have a claim on her.” “I was in the middle of that when you so rudely interrupted.” As if to show off, he moved one tentacle over to you, wrapping around your bare thigh and then the tip shoved itself back into your cunt. Instantly you moaned out, head falling back as it pushed deep. “Think you can fuck her like this?” San was pouty as he watched, but the lust there was unmistakable. “You have a lot to fuck her with. That doesn’t mean shit- is that a fucking egg.” San screeched out, both of you watching a small round object move through the tube-like appendage. You could feel it as it moved along your thigh, heart racing with panic. You tried to grab at it, stop him, but he had your arms pinned at your sides. The stars in his eyes swirled with chaos, striking you with a bit of fear.
Fear that melted away as you were stretched out more than you thought possible, the egg shooting up into you and pushed into your womb. It was intense, head falling back as you cried out, shaking from the sensation.
“Oh my God-” San was in awe at your sight, which drew your attention even through the haze. You wanted to slump forward, instead you couldn’t tear your eyes away as cum shot out of Hongjoong’s pink cock onto San, covering him in what looked like melted pearls. “Fuck-” San winced as a splatter got on his cheek, but Hongjoong wasn’t paying attention to either of you.
For what seemed like an eternity, both you and San couldn’t tear your eyes away from the alien. His tendrils trembled from the aftershocks of his climax, his hands moving up his body and twisting his own pink nipples while there was a soft glow behind his closed eyes.
You did notice that Hongjoong was no longer holding San down, just sitting on his thighs and tilted back in pure bliss. San could’ve easily pushed him off, in fact you had no idea why he didn’t. Was he just as enamored with the alien as you were?
The shifting between your legs reminded you that you were still impaled on the alien tentacle, though now he was pulling out. In a moment of panic you tried to grab at it, whining because you didn’t want to be left empty.
But even as it was pulled out, you didn’t feel empty though, the egg inside a weighted reminder that you were being bred. Collapsing forward on your palms not that you were let go, you panted out. “J-Joongie~ Please give me more.” You whined, needing more, and that was all you could think about in your hazy state. Hongjoong murmured something in a language you didn’t understand- what you recognized as his own language- as he slipped off of San and practically ignored you. So you whined again, reaching out for him.
“Are you just going to ignore her?” San scoffed, pushing himself up onto his elbows now that he was mostly free.
Hongjoong shook his head, most of his extra limbs retracting. “Your turn.”
“My turn?” San screeched out just as you let out a loud noise of confusion. You were getting really hot now.
In a flash, San's clothes were just gone, exposing his own thick and throbbing cock standing at attention. Your eyes zeroed in, spit building up in your mouth as the need for Hongjoong shifted to San and his throbbing member. Hongjoong giggled breathlessly, motioning with his fingers to the two of you. “Fuck. Fertilize. Next egg is prepping.” He rubbed his lower stomach now, a tiny bulge there that you noticed finally.
The eagerness to be filled with another egg had you crawling over to San and straddling his lap.
“Hey hey wait- sweetheart just think- fuck~!” San’s protests were cut off as you impaled yourself down on his cock, all fight leaving him as he grabbed your sides. “Fuck I think I can feel it. It’s hot. You’re throbbing… sweetheart I-” “Shut up and just fuck me San. Don’t tell me you didn’t think about it before.” Sliding a hand up through his hair, you tugged at it to get his full attention. “Or did you wear such a slutty outfit just for the hell of it and not to get me staring?” He swallowed hard, heat darkening his features and a bashful pout on his features. “But not like this.” He didn’t deny, and for you that was enough reason to roll your hips and feel him move inside you. He was harder than the tentacles, but just as deep that he probably could feel that large egg sitting in your womb. “Sweetheart please.” 
“Would you prefer to carry my eggs?” Hongjoong moved to sit beside you both, staring at the spot of cum that had dried on San’s sharp cheek. “Because I can arrange that.” Neither of you answered, both instead groaning at the thought, picturing San’s taunt stomach bulged out with the tentacles or eggs or both. Hongjoong laughed at your thoughts, at least it seemed so with the knowing smirk on his lips. “I could just fuck you both that way.”
You were on your back the next second, legs pushed up by San’s thighs and both of your behinds exposed to the warm air of your home. He seemed just as surprised as you were, only for his confusion to melt away, brows furrowed as he looked down between you. Your slightly swollen stomach was a sight to see pressed against his lower abdomen- hell he was a sight to behold just hunched over you and trapping you in with your legs and his wide shoulders. There was a slap, San lurching forward with a yelp that quickly turned into a groan, leading to control snapping and he was finally giving you what you wanted. “Sorry Sweetheart~” He drawled out, rough hands from years of farm work holding your hips still as he slammed his cock into you at an even rougher pace.
You didn’t care one bit, head falling back and just taking what he was giving you. It felt like a heavy haze of lust was encompassing you again, moans spilling from your lips as all you could do was lay there and get bred. Not that you minded at all.
Greedily you grabbed onto San’s shoulders, nails digging in as he bent forward more to rest his forehead on your shoulder. The soft grunts and whispers of your name and the dozens of different names of endearment he had for you falling from your lips. His breath felt hot on your skin, but nothing beat the pulsating heat from your womb.
Not even the slick intrusion in your rear, which by San’s reaction, he had a similar intrusion. “Fucking hell- my ass!” He twisted enough to growl at the alien that refused to be forgotten, just to let out a higher pitched moan than he was moments ago. It almost matched yours, the double penetration of his cock and now one of Hongjoong’s slimy tentacles pushing up inside, made everything almost impossibly tight.
For you and San. “What, don’t like it?” Hongjoong mused, thrusting the tendrils in and pushing you both across the floor a bit. “Do I need to do the fucking as well.” With an annoyed hiss, San turned back to you, a challenge in his eyes that ended up matched by his dimpled smirk. “Seems like he got lonely, doesn’t it sweetheart?” You nodded, eyes rolling back at how deep both your holes were currently filled. “D-don’t mind. Come on Sannie baby, fill me up. He wants it so bad~ give it to me please.” With how tightly you two were pressed together you managed to grab his firm butt cheeks, loving how they tensed as your nails dug in deep. 
He hissed again, then picked up pace that put his earlier one to shame. Now cries and screams fell from your lips, the wood beneath your back a harsh reminder of where you were but with both of them fucking you at such an animalistic pace you couldn’t even think.
Even when you came you could hardly tell when it started or passed, just trembling beneath them and holding on for your dear life. 
Hongjoong was just in sight to the side of you both, stroking his pink cock in sync with the tendrils he was fucking you both with. You were well aware when San started spilling his seed into you, his cry matched by an almost overwhelming heat between your legs as he filled you up deep. The egg pulsated in your womb, just absorbing what San was giving you, satisfying you in ways you didn’t know you needed.
The alien stilled himself inside you both, no eggs pushed in but his pretty pearlescent cum splattered on the side of both San and yours faces. The second it seemed to touch your skin the haze in your mind seemed to thicken. It would have you suspicious if you didn’t feel so damned content and peaceful.
In fact, so content and peaceful that the next time you were actively aware of your body and mind you were sitting on the couch, cleaned up and curled against San’s side. The man was once more wearing pants, a blanket was wrapped around you, and Hongjoong was sitting on the coffee table passing for a regular human almost.
The two were chatting, and you couldn’t really make out what was said until Hongjoong caught your attention with the phrase “I thought I’d never get you two to breed.” You sat up, frowning a bit. “What the fuck do you mean by that?” By the sudden panic on his face, you guessed he hadn’t realized he said it. “Well- uh- I mean you’ve been thinking about sleeping with him since I got here!” While it wasn’t a lie, you shifted to get up and interrogate him more. 
Both Hongjoong and San stopped you, hands on your swollen and heated stomach. Right, they had literally just bred you…. Convenient that San had stopped over when he did. “Sannie, why did you stop over today?” “The last few weeks there were usually weird sounds coming from your field around this time so I thought I could come over and ask you about it.” The sweet man was staring at your stomach, much more calm about this situation than he had been earlier.
Even you felt more calm, which was alarming by itself. You don’t remember any sounds around this time, but it was also the time of day that Hongjoong would be in the barn working on fixing his ship. Today he insisted on bothering your cat Salem though… it clicked. Slowly you turned to the inhuman being who looked to be perspiring oil down his neck. “Hongjoong… did you plan this from the beginning?”
San joined you in staring the nervous alien down, which considering what had just transpire was an ironic turn of events. “Now that you mention it… it is odd. When he was touching me I just got so damned horny too.”
“Same actually… think it’s some alien trick?”
“Maybe the slime?”
“Hmm maybe… fucking hell we’re talking about this like it’s the weather. What the hell did you do Hongjoong?” You snapped out, hissing at the creature.
He couldn’t meet your eyes, but his explanation came out like word-vomit. How his ship was technically fixed weeks ago, his incubator was fine, but he couldn’t leave like that. It took both you and San to pull it out of him. “Because I maybe, accidentally, imprinted on you both… now I’ll get sick if I’m away from you two for too long… Might have made sure it’s the same for you both now…” He pointed to your stomach, really solidifying what you had done.
San and you both scoffed, then shared a nonchalant look. Despite the daunting situation, there was a big part of you that you didn’t think would have minded even without the added imprint or whatever Alien thing Hongjoong had going on. It seemed the same for him. Still, you both grinned, then laughed. “Ha. Aliens.”
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| @intowxnderland | @lover-ofallthingspretty | @fanficsruinedmylife | @mooniicore | @shadow-assassin-blix |
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markrosewater · 28 days ago
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hi Mark! i noticed in "#1202: Psychology" you didn't make any mention of the two aesthetic profiles Vorthos and Mel, and i was wondering whether any of the decisions being made specifically take them into consideration. like i ask this because one of the biggest changes to Magic this year (UB coming to standard) is something Vorthos care the most about but it seems like nothing has been done to directly address them as an audience
The aesthetic profiles aren't rooted in psychology like the psychographics, so that's why I didn't touch upon them in the psychology podcast. I'll probably do another aesthetics podcast one day (I did one as part of my "20 Lessons" series) and I'll talk about them there.
The concept of Vorthos, at its core, is about appreciating the creative elements of card design above all else. Many Vorthos adore Universes Beyond because we've done a very good job at capturing the various properties in Magic card design form.
But yes, there's a subgroup of Vorthoses that care specifically about Magic's creative world building, characters, and story. We're spending a lot of time and energy to make sure the products set in the Magic multiverse are doing a good job of representing it. 2024 had many successes (Bloomburrow, Duskmourn, and Foundations) in this area, but also some failures (Murders at Karlov Manor and Outlaws of Thunder Junction). The creative team is trying to learn from them and lean more towards the type of creative execution that make this group of Vorthoses happy.
As I've been saying a lot, Magic excels at being additive, but has issues with being subtractive. If you want cool Magic settings and characters and stories, we can and will continue to do that. If you want us to stop doing non-Magic settings, characters, and stories, I can't help you there. There's a big audience that enjoys that and so we're making it for them.
I do hear that there are players that are sad that non-Magic elements will mix in gameplay with Magic elements. There will be many limited formats, and a few constructed formats (like Cube or Premodern) where you can avoid that if it's important to you, but the number of players who will only play with in-Multiverse components is low enough that it's not something we're focusing on in the main sanctioned formats.
It's not that I'm not sympathetic. Go back ten years and I was one of you. I fought hard against non-Magic elements for many years. What finally swayed me was seeing how much I enjoyed it when a license that I truly loved got brought to Magic. There's something so exciting, so glee producing about combining two loves, that I became a convert. I want to make people as happy as I was made.
I know this isn't the answer you want to hear. I try to use this blog to be as honest with all of you as I can. Magic keeps changing and evolving because we try to do things that players will love, and there are a lot of players that truly love Universes Beyond.
That said, we're not abandoning in-Multiverse Magic. We're still making three sets a year (the standard for the majority of Magic's life), and we're truly taking to heart the lessons of 2024 (more worlds that are our carefully crafted take on the tropes and less just a place to show them off). Making the Magic multiverse the most compelling and exciting thing possible is still our goal, and there are a lot of people working really hard to continue to do that.
I think the future is bright for the Vorthoses, but I truly understand why some of you are sad with Universes Beyond coming to Standard.
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yoonia · 1 month ago
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— Dia’s tumblr wrapped 2024 
I know it’s super late for me to share this, but just as many would say, it’s better late than never. Thank you so much for the lovely people who tagged me to do this: @beomcoups, @shadowkoo, @kingofbodyrolls ♡
2024 started off smoothly…until it didn’t. The final quarter of the year has always been a hard time for me and it wasn’t that much different this year. As you can probably notice that I’ve been mostly absent ever since the end of October and I deeply apologise for that. I also regret not planning things properly and for not keeping up with my goals this year but that only means that I'll be dragging my WIP list towards the next year.
Thank you so much for everyone who has been there for me this year, and those of you who have stuck by me despite my inconsistencies. I really appreciate your presence on my blog, whether it’s through your likes and kudos, your reblogs, your comments and replies on my contents, and the kind words you sent me through my ask box. You guys have made it worthwhile for me to be here even after all these years, and I don’t think I can thank you enough for that. Here’s to mark the end of our wild journey through 2024 and enter the new year of 2025. 
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OVERALL FIC STATS 2024
Number of fics posted: 4 (four) one-shots, 2 (two) ongoing series, 3 (three) ficlets
Number of fics revamped: 2 (two) completed fics, 2 (two) ongoing series
Number of words written: 448,057 words (dang, no wonder I felt so burned out lol)
Number of fics in progress: 32 (oh, boy…) 
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FIRST FIC OF 2024
❥ A Christmas Fix 01 & 02 —  posted Jan 31st & Feb 1st | 1,926 & 1,226 notes
My thoughts: This was…quite a journey. It’s been a while since I wrote a rom-com story and I was pleased to have been given the chance to write this idea through a collab. The final outcome wasn’t too disappointing either, since I enjoyed writing it and reading it afterwards. I’m glad everyone loved this story as well.
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MOST POPULAR FIC OF 2024
❥ The Stand-In (Revamped version) — posted Aug 13th | 4,267 notes
My thoughts: Okay, yeah…I cheated a little. But to be fair, this fic did get a lot of notes this year before and after the revamping process. I loved this story so much that I felt like it deserved a major makeover and I’m glad I managed to do it this year.
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LONGEST FIC OF 2024
❥ The Bedroom Hymns — series, ongoing, last updated Sept 9th | 50k++ words | I’m too lazy to open each chapter to count the notes I’m so sorry lol
My thoughts: I know…I know, I need to update this one again. I had to take a break from this series because this fic literally became my main focus this year that a lot of my WIPs kept getting pushed back just so I could finish more of this. I had to stop at some point to finally set free my WIPs. I have to admit that I also lost my motivation to write this due to the lack of notes and responses that I got with each update no matter how much time I spent working on it (tacky, I know…but it is what it is). I still love and enjoy writing this, so more chapters are coming. I can see this fic becoming my main focus again in 2025 until I’m done with it.
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LAST FIC OF 2024
❥ The Forsaken II: Tears of the Sea — posted Oct 24th | 712 notes
My thoughts: Holy hell…this fic. Who would’ve thought that I’d be revisiting siren!Taehyung this year after…3 years?? Thank you, whoever it was that sent this during my birthday event. I never expected to write a full fic for this to continue the original story and to answer a lot of your questions, but I’m glad I did! 
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Honorable mention: 
❥ Our Imperfections — posted Oct 30th | 92 notes
My thoughts: This was the last thing I actually released before I dipped into the void but I couldn’t count this as a fic as this was considered a ficlet or, in a more common term, a drabble.
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PERSONAL FAVOURITE FIC OF 2024
❥ Blooming Wallflowers — posted Sept 25th | 927 notes
My thoughts: I had one of those rare moments where I found myself enjoying the writing process of a story so much that things simply kept flowing until it became a full story. This one went twice the size planned (and commissioned) but I have no regrets. At all.
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Honorable mention: 
❥ Maps (revamped version) — series, completed, posted Sept 6th, 7th, & 11th | 1,4k++ notes (again, I’m too lazy to open each chapter lol)
My thoughts: I initially planned to release something else for DPR Ian’s birthday this year. But then I started revamping the graphics for his old fics instead and decided to revamp the whole series while I had the chance. This one has always been my fave work that I wrote for Christian, so diving back into this to do a makeover and give it a major upgrade felt absolutely fulfilling. 
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2024 SPECIAL EVENT
❥ 𝖙𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙 𝖋𝖆𝖑𝖑 𝖘𝖊𝖗𝖊𝖓𝖆𝖉𝖊: yoonia’s 2024 birthday bash
My thoughts: Once again, I can’t thank you guys enough for joining this small event of mine. I promise that I’ll have another event in 2025 so please stay tuned! (see you in March!) 
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Fave reads of 2024
I have to admit that I haven’t been doing a lot of fic reading this year. But I’m happy that I got to dive back into reading some fanfics during my birthday event and found some lovely gems that I truly enjoyed
The Taste of Sin by @shadowkoo
Vignette: Duty by @cybrsan
The Athlete by @beomcoups
A Lover's Redemption by @writtenwhalien
Dandelion by @shina913
The Wood by @sailoryooons
Minted by @kithtaehyung
Mr. & Mrs. Yoon by @monamipencil
On The Ropes by @raplinesmoon
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Top Ten Tracks of 2024
Loved — B.I
People — Agust D
Make You Mine — Black Violet
Gemini — Cheyenne 
Close To Me — Mamie, Eloy, Trippy Bass
HUH?! — Agust D feat. J-hope
Love — Lana Del Rey 
Reasons — COTIS 
Watch Me Burn — Michelle Morrone 
Die First — Nessa Barrett  
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GOALS FOR 2025
Write more. Tackle more WIPs each month. 
Finally finish my old abandoned WIPs (About Time, Blood Moon Rising and the Shifters Series, Chance Encounter) 
Finish writing and officially release my original stories/novel as a web-series
Try to do better with planning and scheduling and keeping up with them
Finish revamping Carousel and release the novel version on Ream
Read more. Both published books and released fics
Focus more on my personal health, mental and physical 
Start job hunting again
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I know I’m late for this, so I’m passing this over to the writers who are tagged on the list above (if you haven’t done this yet) and also tagging a few who come across my mind right now (only if you want to!): @ressjeon @lo1k-diamonds @pars-ley @minisugakoobies @inkedtae
And also tagging randomly anyone who feels inspired to create their own tumblr wrapped! 
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acewritesfics · 1 year ago
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I Protect Those I Love | Tommy Shelby
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⚠️ THIS IS A REPOST FROM MY MAIN BLOG @/DLMLUFICS. UNFORTUNATELY, I HAVE TO DO IT THIS WAY. MORE INFO IN MY PINNED POST.
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Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader
Request: No
Fic Type: Imagine.
Warnings: Mention of readers father being a scumbag, mentions of assault. Protective Tommy. Short and sweet. 
Word Count: 917
TOMMY SHELBY MASTERLIST || MAIN MASTERLIST
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Y/N's wiping down the bar of The Garrison when the doors slam open and shut, causing her to jump and reach for the gun she keeps hidden under the bar. It is past closing time, so she isn't expecting anyone. She's about to pull the gun out when she sees the intruder, which is none other than Thomas Shelby. 
"Damn you, Tommy. You almost gave me a fucking heart attack," she scolds the Peaky Blinder and her lover. Her attitude toward him changes when she takes in his appearance. A bruise is already forming around the cut on his cheek. Her whole body is filled with worry for the handsome, blue-eyed man. "What happened?" 
"A man came looking for you at the betting shop," Tommy informs her. "He said he was your father." 
Her body freezes as she feels the blood drain from her face, her skin going a shade or two lighter as she thinks about the man who has caused her nothing but pain. She told Tommy all about him when their relationship became more than just a friendship. She'd hoped he wouldn't be able to find her, assuming that Small Heath would be the last place he'd think to look if he bothered at all. 
"Tommy, I..." she hesitates. "I didn't know he would come looking for me." 
"I know," he assures her, moving closer to the bar. 
On instinct, she grabs a glass, fills it with Tommy's usual order, an Irish whiskey, and slides it in front of him as he takes a seat across from her. She goes to pull her hand back when Tommy takes it in his larger hand, his thumb stroking the back of it. "I promised I wouldn't let him hurt you anymore, and I'll do anything to keep that promise." 
"What did you do, Tommy?" She asks, her stomach churning at the thought of the length he'd go to for her protection. 
She picks up a clean cloth and an opened bottle of alcohol and moves around from behind the bar. Tommy shifts on the stool he's sitting on, so he's facing her as she dampens the cloth with some alcohol. She stands between his legs, taking his chin between her fingers to tilt his head and hold it steady. He barely flinches as she dabs the cloth against the cut in his cheek, wiping the blood away along with anything that could cause infection. 
"Your father got himself into some trouble, and you were the price he had to pay to get out of it." His tone is tense and angry, his eyes filled with rage at her father. 
She stops dabbing at his cut as she takes in the furious look on his face. She's never seen Tommy so angry before, and she's never felt so scared about what he's done. She knows her father is a scumbag. It's one of the many things she and Tommy bonded over—their good-for-nothing fathers. But she never thought he would go so low as to use her as a bargaining chip for his debt. It makes her feel sick, especially with where her mind is going. 
"Was he going to trade me for his debt?" She asks. 
Tommy nods. "Like I said, I won't let anything happen to you. I took care of the men to whom he owed his debts too." 
"And my father?" She asks, knowing exactly what he meant by "taking care of those men." 
"He's fine," Tommy sighs, picking up his glass of whisky and downing it all at once. "I told him he owes me, and for payment he has to leave you alone and never return to Birmingham." 
"I don't know what to say," she says, unsure of what to think of the situation. She despises her father's lifestyle and dirty scheming ways, but he's her father, and she hopes that one day he will change his ways. But a part of her knows that he never will, and there are some things he's done that are unforgivable. She reminds herself of those times, and any sympathy she has for the old drunk vanishes. 
"I love you," he admits, cupping her cheek with his less injured hand. It was the first time he spoke those words out loud. He'd been thinking about saying them for weeks, but when he tried, they never came out. "And I protect those that I love." 
Her eyes soften as she looks lovingly at the man who's become her home. "You're a good man, Thomas Shelby." 
"But I do a lot of bad things," he whispers just loud enough for her to hear him. For the first time since the war, he's felt ashamed of himself. He knows Y/N deserves more than him. She doesn't deserve everything he pulls her into. But he's a selfish and greedy man. He takes what he wants, and he wants her. He needs her. 
"Everyone does bad things, Tommy, even the godliest people do." She reminds him. "It doesn't mean you're a bad person, not if you have the right intentions." 
Without saying another word, Tommy brings her in close, placing a soft kiss on her lips as her arms make their way around his shoulders. 
She breaks the kiss, keeping their faces close. The scents of whiskey, cigarettes, and mint mix together. 
"And I love you too," she whispers against his lips, pressing her own against his as she kisses him passionately, showing just how much, she loves him. 
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TAGGED: @chapter-in-my-old-diary - @hanawrites404 - @goblinjnr - @halsteadbrasil - @rainydayteacups - @alexxavicry
To join my tag list, fill out this form: TAG LIST SIGN-UP
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hollywoodroses · 5 months ago
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Life of a glam metal groupie | a guns n’ roses headcanon fic
a/n: this is my very first guns n’ roses fan fiction written as a headcanon. I am a bit nervous as I am new to this band.
a/n #2: since I am new to this band, here are some blogs I visit to get inspiration: @their80smichelle @unknownperson246 @misseptember2001 @duffslut
You are duff’s best friend from high school and agree to tour with guns n’ roses as the boys official groupie. This is what life is really like on the road.
Warnings: smut, fem!slash, smoking & alcohol - I went a little crazy with this one, sorry in advanced 🥺 I hope you like it
You have been friends with duff since freshman year of high school
You were a bit odd, you wore glasses and got teased many times from school mates.
When you both met axl a year later, he convinced you get a make-over
To your surprise, there was a talent scout at the hair salon and she gave you an offer to pose for playboy magazine
You agreed as you felt it would give you a confidence boost (with parents permission, you were shocked they both said yes)
You were officially crowned the guns n’ roses groupie in the summer of 1985, three months after the band was formed
Once you graduated high school, guns n’ roses had their debut in 1987 and got a chance to be the opening act for bon jovi
Duff begged you to join the tour for company 😌😉
You developed a smoking habit due to stress of touring and dealing with teenage girls who wanted a piece of the boys
Nights were spent hooking up with duff, he would eat you out to help you get rid of tension
While he just liked to cuddle with you as you felt so far away during the commotion of preparing for concerts 🥺
You invited a young school girl from alabama to join you on tour. You were lonely being the only girl on tour with two rock bands
You started sharing a bed with your new girl friend. (she’s a girl and your friend)
During a scary movie, she kissed you and you forgot about the film
The tour ended in 1988 and you decided to move in with the band as they continued to record music
You married slash in 1991 and a daughter the following year
You became a stay-at-home mom and lived on the road with slash as he performed with guns n’ roses and worked on this solo career
Your best friends are pamela anderson and bobbie brown
You write a successful blog about your life of a glam metal groupie and playboy bunny on tumblr. It’s a main blog so you follow fans of guns n’ roses, mötley crüe and bon jovi.
Your blog has 123,785 followers 🥹
end
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tubborucho · 8 months ago
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A LOVE LETTER TO QSMPBLR
I saw my mutuals write those and decided that I also want to say a few words.
My whole life I loved being part of the communities. I’ve been heavily into fandoms since I was 10, and now 12 years later I can firmly state that QSMPblr community is definitely in my personal top 3 of all the fandoms I have been in.
It’s been such a fun and emotional and thrilling journey with so many ups and downs and I would never refuse to repeat it all over again. I met so many wonderful and incredible people because of this server that I can’t thank the universe enough.
All of my mutuals and followers made most of my 2023 so happy, and continue to do so in 2024, and I really need this joy with everything that happens outside the community itself.
(I am sorry this text is all over the place, I am struggling with concentration atm)
And I am so elated and a bit surprised for how many of you I became one of the favorites blogs here. I mean, I jumped from barely 150 followers to around 820 since september, and it’s all thanks to having so much fun liveblogging and theorizing with all of you.
Despite everything, I think Purgatory 1 was my favorite ever time period here. Yes, there was a lot of frustration and negativity but I don’t think I’ve ever felt such a comradery as back then, with my fellow Soulfire mains. I was in the post limit jail every single day, because I just could not stop chatting with all of you and reblogging incredible posts.
I also hold very dearly the moment, where Bad showed Tubbo the Soulfire Base Recreation. But the main reason is not even that this happened, but the fact that so many people on tumblr, in dms and even in Bad’s chat were LOOKING FOR ME, because they knew how much I’ve waited for that to happen. It was just so heartwarming to wake up to dozens of messages and mentions. I struggle with ‘nobody really cares if i am here or not’ syndrome a lot, so it made my day to see that people do.
I also want to say special thanks to some of you (even though each and single one of you deserve a separate paragraph). Under the cut:
@qtubbo and @mikaikaika. I love both of you so much, our 247 crew maybe on a kinda hiatus, but every moment we spent together is so special to me. We had so much fun, and I couldn’t ask for the batter gang to gash about the lore and cool posts together.
@lionheartedmusings. I am pretty sure you do not open tumblr these days, but if or when you see this: I am so glad that I got a chance to be your friend. We held so many incredible discussions together, and I am so proud to see your success and happy to be at least a small part of it.
@ultra-raging-ghost @dappersautismcreature @born-in-hell @comradeboyhalo @bigboobyhalo @mangofanarts @haloberry @halo-chainsaw @kadextra @skullhalo @aesthetic-gem and all the other ghosties here. Man, ghosties and tubblings alliance is honestly the best thing that ever happened to this community, and I loved all of your posts and liveblogging of Bad’s lore even when I didn’t have a clue what’s happening. You are all so smart and so great, ghosties never deserved all the hate them and the streamer got, I will fight for you always.
@terezicaptor you always match my freak. and that’s everything anyone in the fandom can ever ask for.
@itsbebebrainrotting @cheese-water @soulfireblue @galatoma @phatcatphergus @angelpaperclip @an0nfr0mth3d3n @flojouno @dozyrogue @charliecuntcicle @sweetmoons @kqluckity @h3xt0r @wackytheorist thank you for everything, i see you in my notes very often and most of you posted a lot about soulfire (which are always bonus points from me ahaha), and i am very glad you are here💛
@sweetie-peaches @routeriver @snopiah @thepenguisalive7 @piecanl @shumistar @diornies @flowerquib YOUR ART MY GOD YOUR ART OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD OH MYGOD SO GOOD SO INCREDIBLE OH MY GOD
@etoilesbienne and @pommunist i think both of you have the most based takes, and i almost feel smarter when i read your serious posts.
I definitely missed some people I would love to thank, but honestly, as I said, all of you deserve a special thank you. So if you read this, you are awesome and I love you.
I am not leaving the fandom. But it’s always nice to appreciate people around you.
💛💛💛
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gotranting · 6 months ago
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The push - Remus Lupin x female reader
I want to keep my stories on one blog. This is the same story as from my main tumblr, in case you come across it again.
The idea is...imagine Remus witnessing that your patronus has changed its form.
I'm missing older Remus stories, and I need to scroll way down to find them. Tumblr refreshes every so often and brings me to the first post. So I had enough and wrote a few things. Once again, maybe someone will like it...enjoy if you do <3. I plan on making a part two (one day...), and we'll see how that goes.
There are no warnings, except a larger age gap.
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Imagine Remus seeing that your patronus has changed its shape. You were surprised as well. Whatever has been going on between you two was never given a name other than friendship. A denial of feelings is what I would call it.
For Remus it was also a feeling of not being enough for you. Of being too old for you. What could he possibly give you, he thought. Living from one paycheck to another? Never knowing where you will live next month? Having to suffer all sorts of slurs and insults once people found out he was the creature you chose as your partner? You had a life in front of you. He would not let you waste it.
And yourself? Apparently you were both presuming how the other would react without even asking for the other's opinion. There was a different pattern of thought in your mind, Of course you would not allow him to settle for you. Remus could do better than that. What could you possibly offer him? See, you believed that all your conversations were on surface level (they were not). You thought that once he would try to get to know you on a deeper level...he would find nothing there (Sirius teased him over how enamoured he looked every time you spoke). You did not see much worth in yourself at all. Oh, yes you hid that well. But, if you saw no worth in yourself, how could you possibly believe anyone else would find any. Remus would have spent hours proving you wrong if he knew. Just as you would spend hours proving him wrong.
There was another problem. To be with him would require of you to open up. And that thought alone frightened you. Yes, you two might have spent hours talking about everything. Or nothing sometimes. So, it is strange that it suddenly became something to fear. But perhaps for many it is not strange at all. Anyhow. If you suffered with such thoughts, why would you put Remus through all of that as well? He deserved someone better for himself.
Strange how similar you both were in that regard.
Well, apparently denial of feelings is how it would be between the two. Without a push, nothing would happen except longing gazes, and too long embraces when one came back safe from a mission. Or throwing oneself in front of the other to defend them against a dozen of dementors. It was the strongest patronus you ever casted. A bear that tore down every dementor which tried to get to Remus. Some got to you. Not many. But at least, Remus was safe.
As for that push - Well it just so happened, there was no need for long waiting. It's strange how fate works yes? I wish Umbridge had nothing to do to contribute to this, but sadly she did in a way. After coming to Hogwarts, she did a marvelous job at teaching the students absolutely nothing. With Voldemort returning, the students were vulnerable if there was no one to teach them how to properly defend themselves. Harry, Ron and Hermione had a brilliant idea. Dumbledore's army. Not everyone believed the Ministry's lies. Soon there was quite a few students joining the initiative.
All in all they planned it quite well. But it was always good to get a second opinion. So, when Harry came to the Grimmauld place, it only felt right to ask the three residents of the house for assistance. Sirius was there constantly. He didn't need any convincing. Spending time with Harry, breaking some school rules, aiding in fighting Voldemort...and getting to call Umbridge a cunt as much as he liked. ...He would have done so regardless. But still.
Remus was there at the insistence of Sirius. The last few months have been difficult after his previous colleagues found out what he was. He defended himself when a hex came his way before he left that shop. See, even with witnessing that, he still thought of himself as a monster. After Sirius found out, he would have it no other way than Remus staying with him. And if the previous coworker somehow got too ill from eating one of Fred and George's experiments well...the twins left their things around constantly. It was an honest accident.
The girl? Well, she had a home of her own. Small place. Hidden. Cozy and simple. Sirius insisted here as well. She didn't know why exactly. And she couldn't be at Grimmauld all the time. But she did stop by as often as she could. After finding out about the hexing, it was more than other members of the Order. Good thing that Sirius handled it (it was an accident I swear), or she would have used something far more darker.
With Harry's arrival it was the four of them in the house. Planning which spells would be the most useful ones to teach. Considering they had cleaned the attic, it was as good a place as any to let Harry practice those spells with their supervision. That way he could get a better feeling on what should he pay attention to.
Spell by spell. Expelliarmus. Reducto. Stupefy. Expecto patronum. The push.
„I think that is a break for me. Anyone wants some tea?“ Sirius asked after an hour of dueling. James would be so proud of Harry. Remus was leaning back on one of the tables observing it all. Your dog was begging for food so you kept to the sidelines as well.
„I'm going back in three days. There is no time for breaks. I cannot let them down.“ Harry on the other hand was not backing down. He would not let anyone be unprepared. He would not let anyone lose a friend in front of their eyes. He needed to practice more.
„Harry, you will not be able to teach them anything if you fall unconscious from exhaustion.“
„Then I need to practice more, to endure as much as I can. The death eaters won't stop because I am tired. Voldemort will kill someone else while I am catching my breath!“
The others could only look at each other. One way or another, he would continue. With or without them. So it was decided, that while Sirius went to get tea, they'd practice something other than dueling. It was your time to step to the centre of the room. You agreed that you would cast the patronus. You would make random mistakes, which Harry would have to notice and correct properly. Remus would give him advice in case he missed something.
Considering she did well when casting a full bodied patronus, she didn't think there would be anything unexpected. First try, she moved her hand in a slightly different direction, which Harry noticed quickly. Second time, she didn't cast a powerful enough memory. Harry gave her some ideas. He would do well, they knew it. Third time, she decided to allow for some wisps to flow from the wand. Still not strong enough. Even here, Harry would give words of encouragement. She thought she saw Remus softly smiling in the corner of her eyes. She thought of that. The last time she saw him like that. It was after the Full Moon. Despite Wolfsbane, she found him pale in bed, wrapped up in blankets. With tea on his bedside table, she put a vinyl on. He mentioned he was fond of Cohen. He was a favourite of his mum's. A muggle store had that vinyl. She didn't have to think twice.
He mentioned that vinyl around six months ago.
If he had more strength in him, he'd get up and carry her with him to his bed in that moment. Nothing sexual. Just to hug her closer. To kiss her on the forehead. To nudge his nose to hers, until she gazed at him with that look. A look which left him thinking that it did not matter at all to her that he was a werewolf. Or 17 years older than her. Poor. Broken. At that moment he would know there was more to him. He'd nudge her nose once again until she blushed. Then he would press his lips to hers. And she would brush the hair away from his forehead. No, they would not let each other go. If only he had more strength. And courage.
She thought of him at that moment. At how she still managed to make him laugh to tears, even after that Full Moon. At how they both hummed to the songs. At what could be. The wisps got stronger this time. She saw the outlines of paws, only they were smaller this time. Strange. The whole bear seemed to be a bit smaller than it usually was. Remus's smile faltered, as he noticed what creature was forming in the room. The realisation was slowly dawning on her as well. It was not the bear she has come to expect, it was a wolf. She could lie to herself only so many times, but here was the proof. Right in front of him. A wolf making a circle around Harry. Coming to greet her dog. Harry was busy looking at the beautiful creature to notice two figures standing frozen in the room.
And sure, he hoped that it was him this wolf represented. She would not stop lying to herself, but she still hoped he understood now. What did each of them see though? He saw her carefree look fading. He saw her standing rigid in the centre. Was she ashamed? Angry? What if the wolf was not connected to him at all? He didn't want to meddle in her love life. If only to hide the jealousy of which he had no right to feel. What if there was someone with whom she felt as comfortable as she had with him the night that vinyl played. He had no right to wish it was him alone who would get to see her like that.
She saw him straightening up. She saw his smile fade. The clenched jaw. He was angry. A girl, barely out of Hogwarts fell in love with him. Just what he needed.
Sirius came up with tea. She was quick to apologize, saying all the practice made her a bit dizzy. Remus still stood next to the table. After a moment he excused himself as well. One could sense something went wrong.
„I suppose no one is in the mood for tea anymore. What happened here?“
„I'm not sure. The patronus appeared and right after they both left.“
A push needed to happen. However, that push can move events in any direction. Sirius had no idea what had transpired in that room. But he would do his best to find out.
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Yandere Sabo Alphabet
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Author's Note: I've deadass been off the rig for like, half a year. I'm lowkey sorry, at some point I forgot about this blog. My creepypasta blog kind of became my main and I wasn't watching anime fr, but I got back into One Piece and Sabo has stolen my heart-
Warnings: Emotional Abuse, Mental Abuse, Manipulation, Physical Assault, Guilt Tripping, Rape Mentioned, S/A implied, Deception, Mind Games, Sadism Mentioned, Burning, Injuries, Death, Two Faced Behavior, Jealousy, Amnesia Mentioned, and Being Held Captive.
Links: {Masterlist} {Alphabet Used}
Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?
He is very cuddly, I can say that the ASL brothers in general are very touchy people (especially Luffy.)
Since Sabo is often on missions, he doesn't get to see you as much as he'd like to, so when he does see you, he's hugging and kissing you at any chance he can get.
He also loves seeing you in his hat, it's the cutest thing to him.
Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?
The thing is, Sabo is willing to kill for his darling, but I wouldn't say it's messy. I can definitely see Sabo killing a few people while on missions, so I'd say he's pretty clean with it.
Sabo isn't cruel, so he wouldn't kill them infront of you, but he'll definitely make you know that they're dead, and that it was by his hands.
Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?
Sabo is scary. He's charming, kind, and chivalrous to the max. He's pretty much every girls dream guy, and when you met him you probably fell for him hard.
Sabo is deranged and unhinged however, but he can hide it extremely well. Once you two started dating and you already went with him to the revolutionary army, that's when his strange behavior starts to slowly surface.
He'd never hit you on purpose, but sometimes his sadism get in the way. He never makes you aware of his true intentions, sometimes he's completely in love with you and your own little golden retriever, doing everything you say with no question, but sometimes when you two fight, he becomes a completely different person. I can see him sharing Ace's temper (despite him being the calmest and nicest brother)
Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?
He is so manipulative its not even funny. Sabo loved playing mind games with you, he often tells you that you knew that he was like this, but you went with him anyway, so technically it's your fault your in this situation, which couldn't be further from the truth.
Sometimes he hates seeing you cry, but when you cry wuth rage in your eyes, yelling at him about how much he fucks with your head and how you can't even remember what really happened and instead you remember the false memories he told placed in your head, he can't help but chuckle.
Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?
I don’t see Sabo being vulnerable with you at first. Most of the time he's vulnerable, it's often with Koala because he trustes that woman with his life, and they're pretty much best friends.
But I'd say the first time you saw him vulnerable was when Ace died. He had so many break downs in front of you and all you could do was try and comfort him the best way you could. Times like those really fuck with your head because Sabo is kind of holding you against your will, mentally and emotionally abusing you, and kind of an manipulative asshole, but the times he's genuinely a sweet guy who just wants to make you happy just pop into your mind and you can't help but hug him and tell him it'll be ok and that it wasn't his fault.
Sabo genuinely wants you to be happy, just his method of doing so is fucked up.
Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?
It only adds fuel to the fire. Sabo is pretty patient for the most part and often wants your arguments to be as quick as possible. But, if you keep arguing and yelling at him, his patience runs thin, and that's when you see his Ace like temper.
You two could go at for hours, and he'll eventually just erupt into Flames (literally) and end up hurting you. He'd end up feeling terrible because Sabo never wants to hurt you (Physically of course), so he'd just stare at his arm, surrounded in Flames, before looking at your curled up position in the corner of the room, holding your arm as you cried in pain.
So yeah, try not to fight with him.
Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?
If you escape, he's panicked. Losing Ace really fucked him up, so you leaving him is his biggest nightmare. If the world government knows about your existence, either as his S/O, or you were part of the revolutionary army before hand, or you were a pirate or something, that only makes his paranoia worse because you most likely have a bounty on your head.
He'd look for you everywhere, that man wouldn't sleep until he found you.
I feel like Sabo has developed a fear of forgetting, so he probably writes down everything that happens to him or other people in a diary of some sorts. So he'd write about each day he looked for you, doing anything he could if there was a rare chance that he would forget you.
Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?
The two of you got into a really bad fight. Like, the worst one you two had ever had.
You were sick and tired of Sabo's lies, his manipulative behavior, and just all the bullshit he pulled on you. At first he was dismissing you, telling you that you were making a big deal out of such a small issue, but you kept pressing him and telling him to stop down playing his actions.
Eventually he started arguing back and things got even more heated, and when he got too close, you punched him right in the face. When you realize what you did, you slowly started to back up as Sabo placed his hand on his face in shock. You've never hit him before, ever.
He started at you in silence before slowly making his way towards you.
"I-I’m sorry, I didn't mean to..." You say over as over again as you backed yourself into a corner, your hmeyes tearing up as he got closer.
He'd grab both you wrist in one hand, causing you to yelp in pain as you cried further. He only started at you with cold eyes.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry... please..." You mumbled, you legs almost giving out as you shoot.
He'd then grab your chin roughly, ans then kiss you. But it wasn't a rough kiss, but a gentle and genuine one. It wasn't like the ones he'd give after not seeing you for weeks on end, but it was different, it was kind. It caught you off guard, why was he so gentle?
But eventually you leaned into it, closing your eyes in the process. He eventually loosened his grip on your wrist, but you didn't feel his hand slowly make it's way to your neck.
"I'm sorry, love..."
Then, his grip tightened as you felt burning sensation on your neck. Before you could scream, Sabo smashed his lips against yours, grabbing the back of your head so you couldn't break away.
Your legs gave out in that moment, and Sabo went down with you. You were practically screaming into his lips, it hurt so fucking bad. So, he shoved his tongue in your mouth as a way to muffle your screams. His hands weren't on fire, but he heated them up so they would burn your neck.
When he pulled his lips back, a long trail of saliva connecting your lips, he quickly covered your mouth as he stared to your pained face.
"I'm sorry," He'd say, wiping the spit away before kissing your tears as you slowly passed out from the pain.
When you wake up in the morning, you don't remember a thing. But when you touch your neck and feel bandages, memories start to flood back to you as you cry into the pillow. Sabo was sent on a mission the same day you woke up, so he was long gone before you woke up. But, he felt fucking awful for what he did.
Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?
World government taken down, his book published, and you two living happily together.
Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?
Sabo gets jealous a lot easier than he would like to admit.
When he's jealous, he gets a lot more touchy and often makes back handed remarks about said person.
Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?
When Sabo isn't manipulating you or the two of you a arguing, he's a fucking golden retriever boyfriend. Follows you around, is at your beck and call and will do pretty much anything you want, crazy affectionate, and loves to tease you. If it wasn't for his manipulative and abusive behavior, he pretty much acts like a normal boyfriend.
This also plays a key part on why Sabo is so good at manipulating you. The way he treats you the majority of the time, this kind loving boyfriend, makes you fucking think you're crazy. Like, didn't he guilt trip you into sleeping with him last night? But hey, he gave you the best aftercare of you life, and he got you that jacket you kept looking at when the two of you went shopping. So it wasn't that bad, right?
Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?
Sabo would pretty much go up to you and just start being his charming self. Sabo is extremelylikeable, and he'll get you to blush and laugh a few times. Eventually, he'll start sending love letter to you if you're a pirate or a normal citizen, but even if your part of the revolutionary army, he'll still send you little love letters.
He'll get you gifts and even offer to pay for your drinks if you two ever went out for a drink.
I'm telling you, if you're his darling, you fell in love with him before he started to abuse you.
Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?
When he's upset, yes. Sabo can be pretty unhinged when fighting, but that's about it. When the two of you are just living normally, no fighting or anything, he goes back to the Sabo you fell in love with.
Naughty: How would they punish their darling?
Sabo doesn't actively punish his darling. He actually let's you get away with escaping. But, he does get physical when you piss him off, so that's your punishment.
Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?
You can do everything besides escaping, and telling anyone about his abusive behavior. He'd be so fucking pissed if he found out that you told someone.
Patience: How patient are they with their darling?
Very patient. He had to deal with Luffy and Ace growing up. Luffy's energetic, dumb behavior, and Ace's short tempered, rude behavior made him gain a lot of patience, even if he forgot them for many years.
Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?
If you die, its like Ace all over again. He's blaming himself, even if it wasn't his fault.
If you leave and or, escape, he's looking for you. He's not resting until he does.
Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?
He didn't technically abduct you. If you weren't part of the revolutionary army and a civilian, you moved in with him, and when you tried to leave, that's when you realized you were pretty much a hostage.
If you're a pirate, that's when things get complex because if you're not a captain, that's something he'll have to deal with, but if you are a captain, I can't see you just leaving your crew for your boyfriend. So he'll figure something out.
Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?
I feel like a mixture of trauma and the death of Ace.
Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?
If you scream/cry, he'll try to comfort you the best he can. He wants to see that smile he loves so much.
If you isolate yourself after he was on a mission for weeks on end, he'll be pretty upset. He'll keep asking you what's wrong, and he won't stop bothering you until you tell him.
Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?
He's a controlling, manipulative yandere, but the amount of freedom and how you can pretty much get him to do whatever you want is kind of crazy. But he isn't stupid or blind, he'll know when you're taking advantage of him immediately, and that's when he shuts things down.
He's revolutionary afterall, he enjoys freedom, and even though he can't give you 100% freedom, or at least just yet, he'll give you the most he can, but not too much to where you'll leave him.
Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?
His overprotectiveness. He's not only overprotective you, but his friends as well, especially Luffy.
It'd be hard to manipulate this, but if you play your cards right, you might be able to get him wrapped around your finger.
Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?
Yes, but not purposefully.
Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?
He kind of worships you, but also kind of doesn't. It's complicated. But he's willing to go hell and back to keep you safe.
Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?
As long as it takes. Sabo is willing to wait a long time for you to love him blindly once again, even if it takes years.
Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?
Yes. It wouldn't be on purpose. It could be a punishment taken too far, or just the mental abuse.
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haveyouplayedthisttrpg · 2 months ago
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A 2024 retrospective
It's the 15th of december and I don't think there will be a lot happening in the last weeks of the year. I will schedule polls until the 22nd and then it's a break till it's 2025. In the mean time, let's do a little retrospective of my year
Running a Poll Blog
In February I started this blog. As of writing, we've had 529 games and i'm sure there's some "big names" that haven't been polled yet. And we haven't got the big D game either. Don't worry, there will be a special day for it.
Anyway thank you all for voting, rebloging and submitting. I am glad to be part of the tumblr ttrpg community.
Playing TTRPG
I like stats. I like having sheets for thing like sessions played, whole collection and my bed.
This year I have played 51 sessions total. It's actually a 50/50 of online and in-person (26-25). Being in a ttrpg club really helps (21 sessions). I also played a lot on @anim-ttrpgs discord book club, great place ( and it's no wonder that Eureka is one of my most played this year).
I mostly played One shot ( 25 sessions)
I was a GM only 19 times, that was a vacation.
My busiest month was July with 10 sessions, that was.... a month.
My most played game this year are :
1 Knight an avalon RPG
2 Eureka
3 Triangle Agency
4 City of mist, The Dark Eye and Vaesen
In total I played 24 official games plus 4 different home systems
Game Design
I had a long pause of writing games. This year, I went out of my funk, created and published again. It felt good. I wanna thank the Nagademon and the Anim TTRPG communities for this.
I published Cooking in Dungeon : a solo larp game for those who have no idea what to cook for their meals
The TCG Oracle : a game that uses any trading card game cards for gmless adventures.
Chaos at Cosplay Con : Everyone at the con became their cosplays. Some lost their mind to the characters, but you didn't and now your group needs to get out before the costume consumes you.
A TTRPG addict
I love ttrpg, I wouldn't run this blog otherwise.
This is seen by my ever growing collection, both books and pdf. I bought games that I discovered thanks to this blog. The blog also made me think about where my games come from, and I tend to consume locally a lot, either with original creations or translations.
I am also impatient (the main reason i learned english is because the english manga scans were further ahead than the french ones) and a good target for FOMO so i often pledge for crowdfunding projects. I am waiting on a lot of them still, mostly pdf, I have my own trello to keep track of them.
Good thing with pdf : they don't take place on the shelves and you don't pay an import tax on them. Bad thing : you can't use them to build a house out of books cause your addiction went awry.
Here's to 2025
Here's to a new year that I hope will be better than the last, and so forth for any future year. May I not lose myself between too many projects and ideas and not finish any of them. I have already started a new one this december, somewhat anonymously and already I hate the white page in front of me.
And here's to staying on tumblr cause it's my trashcan thank you very much, and I will only leave by the force of the bayonets.
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behidethetrees · 1 year ago
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YOU COULD BE MY BABY, LET ME MAKE YOU MY LADY.
IN WHICH…Rafe Cameron cant get enough of you.
Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Fem! Pogue!Reader
Contents: NON CANON!Rafe, Reader fixes cars, Kinda mean and flirty!Rafe, Your main friends are the pogues, This is set in the 2000s!
A/N!!: This is a prequel to this fic per @sublimepenguinpeach-blog request! Rafe is sooo boyfriend i need him idc. Enjoy!
Prequel Part 1
MARCH 2006. 
You were 16 years old when you met 17-year-old Rafe Cameron. You knew Rafe because Everyone on the island knows the Kook prince. Little did you know Rafe knew you too, Kinda. He heard rumors about a new girl moving to the outer banks, But when he found out you were a Pogue he quickly became uninterested.  At first, he thought you were Trash, You felt the same about him. You had heard so many stories about him from JJ and John B that you just believed he was as stuck up and entitled as they made him seem. 
One day at work you went outside to greet your 11 AM client when you realized It was Rafe Cameron. He stood In front of his black Truck, arms crossed and annoyed when he noticed you. Something about you just captivated Rafe's attention. Your face was angel-like with Soft features and big curious eyes that stared right back at Rafe's threatening ones. 
As you fixed His engine you never saw him carefully watching your hands or occasionally glance at your determined eyes, That was his favorite thing about you. Rafe didn't speak to you in the hour he was in your presence, He was afraid if he did, He wouldn't stop. Your voice was so sweet that Rafe knew he would get addicted to it sooner or later. 
You and the pogues attended midsummer and Rafe hated that he couldn't stop looking at you, From afar Your white flowy dress and your flower crown that he was sure Sarah made for you since yours matched hers. Rafe just couldn't help but ask about you. 
“Yo Top who's that chick next to Sarah? Never seen her.” Rafe lied while staring dead at you, Not bothering to move when you noticed. 
“Y/N Y/L/N I think.” Topper glances at Rafe's blank face, picking up on why he was asking.
“ Dude are you trying to bag that? She’s a Pogue, And out of your league.” Topper jokes while hitting Rafe's shoulder, Rafe took a quick look at Topper. 
“She's pretty hot for a pogue.” Rafe took a swig of his drink. 
“Good luck man, Heard she's hard to get.” Topper warns Him. Rafe only rolls his eyes. What Rafe didn't know was that you were talking about him too. 
“Oh my god he is staring at you, Ew!” JJ says as the rest of the group tries to hide their looks at Rafe and laughter.
“Think he likes you?” Kie suggests, You fake gag. 
“That's gross you would even say that.” You hit her on the arm, “I'm gonna go over here, you guys coming?” Your friends follow you to a different area that was out of Rafe's sight, Rafe was disappointed but he knew you two were bound to see each other again. 
And he was right, You two did see each other again. Only at another party one of your mutual friends was throwing. You were left alone on the couch When the only person you knew left to talk to some guy, You saw a blonde-headed boy with a white button-up sitting next to you, You didn't need to look twice to know it was rafe, You rolled your eyes. 
“Damn I just got here princess what's with the attitude?”  Rafe asks amused, Your “I hate you’ attitude didn't work on Rafe, If anything, It made him want you more. 
“Nothing.” You take a slip of your cup, He stares at your facial expression, Noticing your nose scrunching up in disgust as you drink out your cup.
“Can I get you another drink? I'm about to go get myself one.” Rafe offered, You were a bit confused as to why he was even talking to you but you accepted. When Rafe got back he handed you your drink and sat back down next to you. You never expected by the end of the night You would be lying next to a sleeping Rafe. He claimed he was “so drunk” he couldn't go home. 
His shirtless body in the pale moonlight and his messy Long hair in his face made your insides all mushy and your cheeks heat up. Were you feeling a certain way for Rafe Cameron? 
Rafe's unpredictability is what drew you to him, he was hard to read, intimidating, You liked that.
For the next months, you began to see Rafe more often. He knew how to crack you open and reveal everything he wanted to know about you, Within the second week of seeing Rafe he already knew your address and would sneak into the window of your small home at night where no one would catch him. You two didn’t just do malicious things together, Sometimes you two would stare at the stars on the beach and talk about what you two wanted in the future.
One day Rafe surprised you with a gold necklace, ‘R’ shaped, You had a feeling you knew why Rafe was giving this to you but couldn’t help but want to ask, But before you could speak, Rafe beat you to it. 
“ I know you're confused so I want to tell you that I love you Y/N and I want to be yours, as well as I want you to be mine.” He bluntly stated, wasting no time telling you how he feels. 
“You're the only person in the world I dont hate, You're the only person that knows me inside and out and I dont want that to change.” Rafe leg bounces up with anxiety, Waiting for you to respond. 
“Rafe…I love you too.” Rafe eyes visibly widened and he started to slightly smile. 
“But I dont want to be a secret, You’re gonna have to tell people you’re dating a pogue and I know you dont like that.” You looked at him, His jaw unclenched and his face softened.
“I will do whatever you want me to do Y/N, I'm not ashamed of you.” Rafe looked at you, searching for agreement in your eyes, “I dont care what people will say about us. I have loved you for so long nobody could change how I feel about you.” He wasnt lying. Rafe never let anyone dictate how he felt about things, He certainly wouldn't let someone try to tell him he shouldn't love you.  
“Yeah?” You smile at Rafe, He smiles back. 
“Yeah. Now let's put this necklace on and go out to eat Baby.” Rafe Smirks at you as he walked behind you to put on your necklace. You had mixed emotions. You loved Rafe and you were Glad you two finally made it official but you couldn't help the anxiety that pooled in your stomach.
As soon as you got the courage to tell the pogues, The very judgemental pogues, They were shocked to say the least. 
“Rafe Cameron?” “What the fuck?” “Definitely did not expect that one.” Spilled out of their mouths, You started to regret saying anything. But you couldn't keep a secret from the pogues. 
“Guys please listen, I know you guys dont like him and that's okay but you’re are my best friends and I want you to be happy for me, Even if it's fake I want you to respect me and Rafe.” The pogues all look at each other conflicted. 
 On one hand, in their eyes, Rafe was a rich cocky asshole that always excluded the pogues from events just because he could, But on the other hand, You talked about Rafe like he was the sun. You smiled like you would never stop and talked about how good he was to you. The pogues did notice Rafe hadn't bothered them in a while and has been okay when them showing up to his parties, He even congratulated John B and Sarah when they started dating which caught everyone off guard, They started to think that maybe Rafe was changing and you were the reason.
“Does He treat you right?” JJ asks. Out of all the pogues, JJ was the most protective of you. He cared about you like you were his family, You were the little sister he always wanted and he would never let anyone hurt you, especially a man. JJ and Rafe never liked each other but If he made you happy, JJ would be willing to tolerate him, Same as for Rafe. 
“Yes I promise JJ, He respects me, You dont need to worry about that.” You clarified. You knew JJ had a tenacity to interrogate every guy you talked to. JJ thought he knew everything there was to Know about Rafe Cameron, But now he wasnt so sure. 
“Y/N this is insane, But we love you and want you to be happy.” John B steps into the conversation. They all agreed. You smiled at them and jumped to hug the pogues, ‘Thank you thank you!’s Fell out of your mouth as you bounced up and down. 
“I'm serious though, If he ever does anything you let us know and we’ll deal with him.” JJ put his hand on your shoulder carefully not to touch your new glitter tattoo (That you and Rafe both secretly matched). He stared at you, expression serious and stern, You could only hug him. 
“You know he really does love you.” You heard Sarahs voice whisper in your ear. you turn to see her smiling at you, You just knew from then on , everything was okay.
A/N!: hiii sorry this took sooo long to post ive been getting writers block but im back now, Thanks for reading!
Requests
Taglist: @nowitsmissing
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eeveecraft · 7 months ago
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The Fracturing and Decline of the Tulpamancy Community
Why am I back? Well, I've been thinking about this for a while and a friend of mine just discovered the Tulpamancy stuff. If you're reading this, you know who you are. Still not happy that you found out, but it got me thinking about some stuff I want to write down.
So, some of you may know, #RedditTulpas, the official r/Tulpas Discord server shut down like, a few months ago. The Tulpa.info server got shut down back in 2023, and there's also the debacle that happened with Tulpa Chat several years ago. Basically, all of the largest Tulpamancy Discord servers get shut down for whatever reason once they hit a certain point. The main reason why tends to be drama driving the staff to their wits end, which eventually leads to the server being shut down for the well-being of the staff's mental health.
I mean, I guess there's Tulpa Central with its 1,300+ members, but even though Kopase (eugh) isn't the owner anymore, it's still a server that deliberately excludes other forms of Plurality, and I don't think communities like that should be encouraged to exist. Because let's be honest, that's just thinly-veiled ableism and ignores how Tulpamancy techniques can help disordered systems function better. Oh, that and the fact that other plurals can have tulpas, too.
I also want to bring up how r/Tulpas has drastically declined in quality; we are especially cognizant of it because we moderate that subreddit. There's a lot of low-effort, redundant, and sometimes low-key unhinged posts on the Subreddit, and there is very little actual productive discussion. Most posts there nowadays are just questions, many of which have to be removed because they're already questions that are answered in the FAQ or so basic that they should be asked in the pinned post.
With Reddit specifically, I think a factor in this decline is the direction Reddit has been going with trying to become a publicly traded company, especially with their API changes essentially killing third-party apps. That, and Reddit gleefully giving away all of its user posts to OpenAI with no ability to opt out. We ourselves only check Reddit to moderate the subreddit nowadays because of these changes, and we wouldn't be surprised if others followed suit.
However, this doesn't discredit the general trend we've seen with the larger Tulpamancy communities just declining or outright dying.
The Tulpamancy side of Tumblr has been pretty quiet for several years now with the only major Tulpamancy-specific blog besides ourselves really being Sophie's and maybe Caflec's, and we're hardly active in terms of making posts (we just don't have much to talk about anymore).
There was also the Tulpa.info Mastodon instance, Tulpas.social, but that died pretty damn fast. Plural Café closed invites the moment we tried recommending it to others and has been gradually falling apart, too.
My point is: there's hardly any actual large gatherings of Tulpamancy systems anymore. I remember in one of my Tulpamancy Help videos, I explained how the community became fractured, but I think it's gotten even worse. Like, don't get me wrong, I don't think the community should be a monolith; niches exist for a reason. However, there's something just... disheartening about seeing gatherings of 1,000+ Tulpamancy systems just getting dissolved; thousands of people conversing, exchanging ideas, and helping each other just... separated.
You're probably wondering, "Well, if you're complaining about it, you surely have some kind of solution, right?" Well, not really. it seems to be a cycle tied with the general makeup of the community; enough people in the community just seem to be drawn to petty arguments and drama that takes a toll on the people who manage these communities. So for larger gathering to exist, the people need to be palatable. Otherwise, as new communities form and people flock to them, the same people that caused the downfall of the others before will follow suit. And to be frank, I don't quite have a solution in regards to getting people to stop gravitating towards and starting mentally-taxing drama. That's up for the individuals inside the community to figure out, let alone want to change.
So, what's the conclusion? I guess it's just that I believe the community is heading towards some kind of recession, a dark age of some kind. And that makes me sad to extent because the more Tulpamancy spreads, the more its techniques can be used to help people. There's a reason anthropologists and psychologists are studying Tulpamancy, especially with the interest in its possible therapeutic applications. Despite that, I want to be optimistic and hope that eventually, the community finds its stride again instead of fading into further obscurity.
7-15-2024
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