#i got myself into a small thing
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there is always tomorrow
#lovecore#hopecore#webweaving#the presence of love is beautiful in itself#you got this#self care#self love#recovery#healing#hopepunk#recovery is not linear it is okay to have bad days you have the entirety of your life to have a better day#i wish anyone reading this a good life#i love you#you are loved#and i hope you will find happiness in the small things#i’ve been struggling a lot recently but i always remind myself the good set in store for me and look up places in the city i’ll move to#and it motivates me a bunch so i hope u all find things to strive towards mwah
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wing stuff!
experimenting with a more cartoon style, idk what i'm doing loll
tagging: @goodomensafterdark <3
#ymight say i'm *winging* it!!#then again you might not#my art#good omens#fanart#crowley#aziraphale#wings#digital art#digital painting#aziracrow#ineffable husbands#wasn't completely without references here esp for the wings#but i got further away than usual#and didn't use screenshots of michael sheen or david tennant's faces to do the characters' faces#i'm all right with how everything turned out except crowley's face#i have a hard time simplifying and leaving things out for drawing small or more cartoony#i end up trying to clumsily cram more detail in than the size or style wants and it looks weird#oh well it is practice it is valuable!!#i did most of this yesterday which was my bday lol present to myself#my days of short captions and a journal in the tags have come to a middle
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I started drawing this next day after I finished Act 6
13 or so days and it's finished!
Main things are traditional and Loop's body was edited digitally after
Unedited it looks like this
I've been torn on how to do Loop's body for the entirety of lining, also
A bit sad the main lines are visible only as a wip, most of this thing is literally just a ton of sharp lines
I think it's also my first day of drawing, Loop is just a sketch here (feat. my leg)
I even finished the beans before it so they were a moral support, because if you let me things like this take a year
#fanart#my art#isat#isat fanart#in stars and time#isat loop#loop#traditional art#artists on tumblr#Phew#So anyway this was my way of figuring out my thoughts after finishing the game#I didn't even actually finish it with credits playing at that moment#This type of art is my therapy#And in a way literally how my personality works from big figures to small details of thinking about anything#It's really calming!#I won't tag paper figures but they're here#Like special guests#In any case the funniest thing was showing this to my English teacher and she was like 'wow this looks stressed' or something#Like she immediately looked at the lines and after I showed her my old Flowey drawing like this she was like#'oh it makes sense! This one looks calm but this one is clearly you not feeling good'#Because I was kinda#Like sitting there in the semi-park and feeling sick since morning before I started drawing this and slowly I got better#I already talked about this on my first 'big' isat thing - I needed to think a bit#And not think at the same time just literally letting myself sort stuff out#Like. I fell asleep at 6 am that day and woke up at 10 4 hours of sleep after playing full Act 5 and two hats stuff IS STRESSFUL#SUPER STRESSFUL! Like I felt like I was playing for 4 hours while sleeping#Anyway by the time I finished it aka today I'm feeling way better and I'm literally talking a walk right now#Touching grass as we speak#Anyway phew!#Now to that animatic that's plaguing my mind to draw it nowww
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Yandere Chrollo Kissing Thought
A/n: Proof read enough to get sick of 3 paragraphs, grammatical errors(?) tbh just sentence structure dw, and teeth. A paragraph about teeth. Thank u and good night.
Chrollo is waiting for the right moment to kiss you. He wants it to be magical, other worldly, just as enchanting as he fantasizes it to be; the plush flesh of your lips and tease of your tongue already invading his mind. Are you the type to be shy and only caress your tongue against his time and time again, or are you bold and willing to give every fiber of yourself to him? Swirling, interlocking, and roping around each other sloppily-- it's the thing of every man's dream.
He wants to feel the structure of your teeth through your warm lips, the outward curve of your lower face clashing against his. Would it be weird if he let his tongue slip across your teeth and to your gums? Occasionally, of course. Chrollo finds the idea of feeling the texture and shape of each individual tooth slotted in the wet, firm insides of your jaw alluring. He longs to study your body, to worship it like it was meant to be. Treasure and read it over repeatedly like the many books he's stowed away in his personal collection of stolen items.
But how to do that without you trying to scratch his face off like an ungrateful house cat? Seems like only time will tell. For now, he'll just stick to kissing your cheeks while you're dead asleep, or ghosting his lips over your shoulders if your guard is down on a good day. Chrollo wants you to at least tolerate him-- which also already seems light years away-- but woe is him for trying to give you a semblance of his affection for you. He's already got you in his unyielding hold, now he just has to play the long game. And it's not like he's worried about rushing things. You two are going to stay together for a very long time, so you'll give in sooner or later. He knows you, and you'll have to.
#yandere#x reader#yandere blog#male yandere#yandere x reader#yandere hxh#yandere hunter x hunter#yandere chrollo lucilfer#yandere chrollo#yandere chrollo x reader#yandere chrollo lucilfer x reader#yandere hxh x reader#yandere hunter x hunter x reader#wrote this bc i myself havent recieved any smooches in a while#and its been crossing my mind lately errruh#anyyyywaayyyyy#supes tired#dont ask (or plz ask) about the teeth thing#dont act like yall were never a little curious#like when u had a wiggly tooth and poked and prodded in ur bactieria infested mouth#and when u finally got that thing out#u slide ur tongue over the gap#oddly satisfying#right#like am i right#or am i right#hopefully not a tough crowd tonite folks#i used to just rip em out for this reason tbh#just the wiggly ones tho lol#small write for the nite whoo hoo
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since tumblr always has to suffer my personal vents and breakdowns and rants and annoyances you get the most wips and pics of unfinished stuff, im sure that makes up for it
the (unfinished) shiekah arm concepts that made me want to explode and i dont think im gonna work on again
#ganondoodles#art#zelda#ganondoodles rewrites totk#botw2#wip#calling it wip but i dont think i can go back to it#i tried to keep going on this for so long bc i have had the idea in mind for so long and it seemed fun#well ...... turns out that was a lie#thought to myself maybe i can do like one of those cool concept art things where they just go for interesting shapes first#and then refine it to actually work#but im not made for it#tbh im not sure what im made for#(i dont think posting wips im not posting elsewhere actually makes up for my annoying mental health spirals..)#i hope its not too small#was intending to go for version H but only got to do one variation#the outer casing can be customized with several designs#theres a guardian arm that extends and stretches to form the hookshot in the bulky part as well as the stored magic#there is always something on it to glow bc it also subtly shows how low your magic meter is#and if it runs out the blue parts turn orange like other shiekah tech in stand by mode#wanted to draw all that on here too#but .... ill need to start over when im doing better ....... WHEN im doing better and can draw again#speaking it into existence#(....man how all those “designs” look is so ... i feel even stupider for getting so extremely frustrated over it ...)
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it mattered because when my brother asked me what if this is the happiest you'll ever be? the best you'll ever get? the thing i felt was fear, not peace. everybody thought you were so perfect for me. even i thought you were "helping me grow". i had to challenge every internal clock. make myself more thoughtful, more kind, more beautiful.
i told my therapist it was good because i like the changes i made and there's something so strong about saying i did that. the problem is that i can like the difference all i want, but i changed for you. something akin to getting your name tattooed, all my progress is stamped with fuck you.
it was the happiest i'd ever been and also the best i'd ever gotten. i would still get in the car and think what the fuck just happened.
#warm up#writeblr#i spent a lot of time picturing our future#how funny to think: in each version of our future#i was never myself#i was someone smarter kinder braver#better adept.#who could navigate the way you shouted and got angry at small things and never fucking believed the best of me#i would never be needy and you'd never get tired of me#people usually talk about how we picture people as being “fixable”. but i assumed i was the problem. my idyllic picture wasn't of you.#it was a version of me that wasn't ill. that needed no extra help. that could be your wife and happy#the fact i wasn't happy was because there is something so wrong inside me. it's always been that way. i convinced myself:#if i stay i can change. if i stay i can make it worth it. i can apologize and fix this. and make us both okay.#for the last year i've been thinking about how you blamed our whole breakup on me. how it was my fault for whatever thing.#and i agreed with you. because of course i did. you'd trained me to believe everything was my fault . that you wanted to love me and i made#it far too hard. that i was always finding ways to ''set you off'.#a few days ago while i was doing something else#i realized that while i was in crisis you told me to fuck off and find someone else to get help. and you never fucking apologized .#you said i made you do that because i wasn't being sensible. i had been crying too hard to speak clearly.#you said: you're doing this to manipulate me.#you forgave yourself for that. i had to forgive you without apology. you said you were right to react that way. and then you were SO#SO annoyed. any time i said: i feel like you aren't nice to me. it is hard to trust that you love me.#i don't think about you that much anymore. but these days when i do: all i can think is that im not sure u ever really understood kindness#you were the cruelest to the people closest to you. and most of the time. that meant it fell to me.
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I met the me who made different choices
#idk what this means so dont ask#got the words stuck in my head and this is what I wanted to draw for it immediately#me at my desk. so.#I dont look exactly like this obviously. doesnt matter. anyways#hard time recently in a lot of different ways#lots of work to do!#given up on getting everything done I kind of failed at that. it was too much#so now I'm just trying to get anything done that will make the next 6 months not kill me again#ideally. 3 episodes. or the book#or like at least close enough to that that its basically that#I'm feeling really screwed LOL#I dont know how I've been working every day for so long and still havent done enough...#(its because the work load is way too much)#every time I take 1 hour for myself. to cook. or clean. or draw something else. or play a game. I feel so guilty auauau#I hate webtoon I hate this damn green app...#DOESNT MATTER!!!#what DOES matter is my art is good as hell... look at this shit...#the light. the colors. I love you red I love you green#I need to get more red pants I only have the one pair.#I saw this guy with red pants that had skeleton legs on them and I was like FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!! I need them!!!!#I need to start sewing again. I dont have a sewing machine cause my apartment is too small so I havent sewn in years but I really want to..#I want to make clothes again... I need some vests I need some dresses..#I will not make pants or sleeved shirts because I dont hate myself#sketch#art#vent art I guess LMFAO its not#its just this fun little thing we like to call self expression#also this isnt how my desk setup actually is I scooted things around cause I didnt wanna draw anything twice. fuck it we ball#ok back to work
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AND I MET THE CHANGE GOD TOO. OKAY. COOL OKAY
#I WASNT EVEN MEANING TO SO I ACCIDENTALLY SKIPPED THE DIALOGUE BEFORE I KNEW WHAT WAS HAPPENING FUCK#ill go and find it later if only to give myself peace of mind. BUT WOW. WHAT THE FUCK#my original plan was to 1) work my way to the king and talk to him 2) doom myself and take everyone down with me 3) loop back to floor 3#so i can visit the observatory and scrounge for any lore. although since i got killed that run siffrin asked the king to kill him first#which was intereresting. but i decided to have all doors unlocked that time around so i can just get the starcrest and go#but for some reason it wasnt working so i went to get the keyknife since i was already there and completely forgot i already had it#from the previous loop and THATS what triggered it. IT WAS FUNNY BUT ALSO SCARY BUT ALSO I THINK I GET WHAT THEY MEAN#about siffrin going back without actually changing. going along with a script even if his feelings on things change#the same way he has his own small rituals like the carving thing and does it for constancy. reassurance or safety even#and the times when he breaks script and ends horribly like the sadness attacking thing and bonnie yelling at him cause him to loop#to avoid it. although i cant really say anything bc id probably do the same thing. maybe not for the same reasons since im cruel#and make him do the worst to see what will happen since i put curiosity over rejection sensitivity as an observer and player but well.#i feel wrongfooted bringing it up since i dont have it myself but i have to wonder if this kind of leans into ocd tendencies.. i remember#reading something about how ocd is fuelled by fear. and things like counting and rituals are kind of used to cope with that?#if anyone knows anything more or talked abt it already id be really interested in hearing it bc im almost sure im not#the first to come to this conclusion. but i simply dont know enough nor have the confidence to broach the topic rn esp with how often#misconceptions around ocd get casually passed around so its hard for me to know what is and isnt a baseless assumption#puppy plays isat#in stars and time#isat#playthru#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#isat act 3 spoilers#change god#WHAT WAS THAT WITH WEARING LOOPS FACE THOUGH WHAT THE FUCKKK
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Another good reason to play around with the whole “Miko is a glitch” Theory/Headcanon/whatever you’d call it, even ignoring canon’s “evidence” or the fact that if any of the techs were a glitch, Miko would be the most likely candidate, is the fact that out of all of the Techs, Miko is the person that would take learning that information THE WORST out of all of them.
Even ignoring that moment in Going Going Gauntlet where she has a brief existential crisis over if Ally is technically alive or not, think about Miko for a minute.
Practically her entire life she’s been an outsider in some way. Most other kids her age either know her as “that one kid who kicked Ralphie Bear’s head off at someone’s birthday party” or “that weird girl in the arcade with the high score in Rock ‘Em Sockers”. (And it’s slightly implied the series of events went Rock ‘Em Sockers -> Birthday Incident with Miko (having just moved to Bailey) originally getting herself noticed through Rock ‘Em Sockers only for everything to come crashing down when she was invited to that birthday party.) She’s had basically no real friends besides a few people she plays online games with until very recently when she met Five and even in her own family she’s a bit of a black sheep. And Miko is fully aware of all of this.
Miko desperately wants friends and she’s terrified of the possibility of losing the few friends she does have. She’s scared of being seen as “the weird kid” or “not normal” or anything that could potentially push people away from her. Just look at The Glitch Modder for one of the best examples. Mitch’s comments about Miko being weird, everyone else being unnerved by her reset immunity and ESPECIALLY Miko finding out that Five also sees her immunity as something strange sets her off for the whole day because of exactly what I’ve said before.
Miko desperately wants to be viewed as normal (most likely because she’s been othered before for being “weird”) and seeing everyone else’s immediate reactions to her immunity and especially the reaction of Five, her literal best friend, has to be pretty soul crushing to her. That’s also why Mitch’s comments get under Miko’s skin so easily here. It’s a massive pressure point for her.
Even as a much smaller point, we have Miko’s reaction to Five calling her Meeks. She hates it, but lies and goes along with it anyways because she’s afraid of doing anything that could even risk pushing Five away from her. It’s a tiny point, but still worth bringing up because it’s a tiny example of Miko just being desperate have friends.
So take all of that into account, and then look me in the eyes and tell me with a straight face that Miko would take learning that she’s not human but in fact one of the literal MONSTERS that she and her friends regularly hunt down even REMOTELY well. It is maybe one of the worst possible things that could ever happen to her.
#glitch techs#miko kubota#analysis#And that’s before even focusing on some of the really specific things#like Miko getting briefly hung up on if Ally counts as being alive or not#because that’s definitely going to be the first thing that enters her mind the next time she tries to sleep#Or the much much worse realization:#Oh what’s that Miko? You’ve always wondered why you kind of felt like an outsider in your own family?#Bad news: Here’s the answer.#on another note I think Miko may be one of my favourite characters because I can relate to her a lot#viewed as the weird kid throughout all of my time in school#had no real friends for basically all of my childhood#once I got a small group of friends I was desperate to not lose them because I didn’t want to go back to being alone#horrible undiagnosed ADHD#I see a lot of myself in Miko and relate to her heavily
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I lost it for some time but I'm finding back all the reasons I loved RWBY so much in the first place, and I think I can feel it as I redraw Penny, Ruby and many other things ♥ I have this Vacuo comic idea in mind for like a year now, and I think I can finally draw it
#rwby#art#comic#that's hard to explain but with time I really got myself mixed up with the series and the fandom#I'm trying to relearn enjoying the show without the fandom in mind like it used to be#So the fandom (a small part of it at least) can be this place I enjoy talking with people about the show and not the reversed thing#I want to redo stuff for myself and my love for the series first and not for the fandom#anyway I might think way too much about this but it actually depressed me so much after the Twitter events and the loss of my cats this yea#that was a big tag rambling lol#thank you for being there ♥
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peppino studies...hes got such a cute face and i feel like im straying away from it
#pizza tower#peppino#arts#mine#i have a thing where i make something curved and draw it very fast#and that makes me draw his nose so small compared to his sprite bc im trying to make the nose in one stroke#so i revisited some old concept art n sprites on the wiki#the one where hes in a fancy suit and he looks kinda confused??? i love it so much it lives in my head rent free#i want to capture that in my art for him#i should do some sprite redraws then to help#hes got like#not necessarily a square jaw but hes got a big jaw and chin; lots of space between his mouth and the bottom of his chin#and that just does not mesh well w the way my brain WANTS to draw him#so i think. bigger eyes and nose and more space than i usually allow between his chin and mouth#i SHOULD just sketch in my book to help w making my lines more natural again but weughh#anyway peppino is cute and i wanna go back to the way i drew him back in my pepperman comic bc i can feel myself slackin
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A few turtley doods from my sketchbook.
Those last disaster twins were inspired by @tangledinink's Gemini Twins AU's because I think about them like, at least thrice a week. They live rentfree in my head. Running and giggling.
#lets!! not! forget! box turtles shells close off completely!!#mikey is so SMALL. this turtie tot.... i want to shove it inside my mouth and eat it like a Tortuguita TM (Arcor)#i'm sorry one of my favorite things on Earth is to project my childhood nonverbalness into Donnie#i also think pretty often about that time someone twitted projecting their menstrual cramps into Raph 'n the post got 1k+ likes and#nobody questioned it at all#i myself just thought it was so natural of Raph like sure that's canon 100%#he's just#so he/she if you know what i mean#mikey rottmnt#donnie rottmnt#leo rottmnt#raph rottmnt#tmnt fanart#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#turtle tots#traditional art#masterpiece
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So it turns out there's a big craft guild organization thing only a few hours from where I live (I saw an ad for their craft fair), and I got like half my holiday shopping done on their website, and the box arrived today! The thing I was most excited to see in person is fragile, though, and it's really well wrapped in bubble wrap and I don't want it to break when I mail it to the friend it's for, so I am not unwrapping it, but oh man the temptation is there lol I also got myself a little metal bug made of a bottle cap and some wire. It lives on my little corkboard where I put postcards and thank you cards now
#the person behind the yarn#I have gotten a little sewing done today during my lunch break#but not much! not much#these unprecedented times sure are not good for my stress levels lol#but the indoor wasp is outdoor wasp again#and I managed to successfully request prescription refills from two of my doctors this week#(for different medications) so that was good! I'm allergic to an inactive ingredient used by most pharmacies in one med#so I have to get just that one medication from a different pharmacy chain and it throws doctors for a loop every time#other good things: I had the answers ready for a question my boss unexpectedly asked during a meeting today#when my dad last went shopping he got more kleenex and the boxes have flamingoes on them so that's cool!#uhhh my dad is volunteering more which means I get to help out more with some prep things for volunteering#which is great I miss volunteering but I can't do what I used to anymore#for the record I did make this post almost entirely to convince myself not to unwrap the super cool thing for my friend#the other small percentage is because I really like the metal bug#I want to make some metal bugs#I don't think I have any of whatever the artist used for filling the bottle cap but I have hot glue that'll probably work#...I think I'm going to make some metal bugs
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Yearningly looking at the Warframe D&D Document bc Man I Wanna Play That
Which is really not as grave as ppl who go "I wish I had friends to play this with but alas :(" about TTRPG stuff in general bc 1) I have a group I play with! It's just Pathfinder 2e instead and 2) said group came together from the playtesters of the Warframe D&D Project. I Playtested For That Project. I Got To Play It Already
Unfortunately that also means that I have firsthand experience with how much it fucks and thus know exactly what I'm yearning for
#the amount of creativity and work that went into that thing goddamn#chatter tag#warframe#apparently theres talk about it elsewhere but ive not seen it on here yet#which is fair this community is comperatively small but Still#im taking this duty upon myself as your resident paladin who got fuckin eaten by grendel#the group i was in was all newbies to dnd 5e and i still find it hilarious#that we got taught a Really hard lesson of Do Not Clump#bc like. most monsters do not in fact have devastating cone abilities!#but a lot of warframes sure do!#we started out our dnd/ttrpg journey fighting nothing but bosses#shadow of the colossus but the sorcerer is setting everything on fire
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I can't remember if you've done any drawings for this before, sorry, but I have a requestober prompt! Vargas ladyverse snake charmer au? Or ladyverse dryder au Scri, I feel like the potential for pretty spiderweb clothes is high there. I would request both, but I want to respect the rules ^^ Thank you!!
Day 27 - Skillfully spun sheer shawl
#My art#Requestober#Vargas#Scriabin#Spider#So fun fact: I did do a couple Ladyverse!Snake Charmer!Scriabin doodles but they were just concept sketches so I never posted them#I still have at least one Ladyverse!SC idea written down but I haven't done anything with it lol#I never made it as far as Ladyverse!SC as a drider but then you said ''fashion'' and that's one of my sleeper words I Can't Not lol#I may have gone a little extra on this one but I was excited! I got sidetracked with those stones in the BG lol#Rock textures are still very fun ahh I can't help myself#The whole thing is extra! The web-cloth needed to contrast against her skin so I needed the directional lighting so I needed the background#Every step needed the next! It was decently fun tho#Not in small part of getting to look at some Acanthoscurria Geniculata <3#Funny actually haha; my step-sister went to the zoo recently and there was That Specific Species of tarantula there!#She took a picture for me :) Cute#Pretty spider <3 And pretty drider!#I'm still very normal about Lady!Scriabin >.> And backs lol they're fun to draw!#You'll notice under the webbing she's wearing a similar top to what I drew Classic!Drider Scriabin in that one time#This one's a halter-top tho :) Leather halter top haha#I think it breaks up the shapes nicely :D#And her little urticating hairs poking through the webbing hehe ♪ She's very cute! Very pretty :)
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No because what do I want for christmas?
#my mom keeps asking and literally I have no clue#I don’t want or need anything I’m perfectly content#I wouldn’t mind like a little hades keychain or something else small and fandom related#but it’s small and probably hard to wrap lol#also for some reason my mom thinks etsy is the devil so I have no hope of getting those lol#(I will likely get one for myself)#anyways#I’ve got a couple things like cds and whatever#idk I don’t really wish for much
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