#i googled it and turns out its not genetic but if you have it its likely you have a parent or relative that did too

[jerzwriter]

Thank you to the brilliant anon who sent this ask from this list! Pairing one Trystan Thorne with one Tobias Carrick may be the most inspired idea in the history of ideas! Since this is before they met their perspective C's (as you put it! lol) I swear this should be my canon. I've wanted to do a Trystan x Carolina end up in Edenbrook's ER when Tobias x Casey are on duty forever - and this would make it even better! I am LOVING that idea!!!! Thanks so much for the ask!

Books: Crimes of Passion/Open Heart Crossover Pairing: Trystan Thorne x Tobias Carrick Rating: Teen Words: 1,032 Summary: It must have been a wild party... because when Trystan and Tobias woke up in the same bed... neither had any idea how they got there. Can they figure it out? A/N: This fic takes place approximately 2 years before the start of Open Heart Book 1. Participating in @choicesjunechallenge2024 - June (for Pride month) and "In or Out?" The original prompt was for scenario number 12 from this list by @creativepromptsforwriting

There’s something about the morning sun that commands respect. Its power is undeniable, rousing people from slumber, no matter how much the prior evening’s choices have them desiring a full day spent in bed.

That’s where Tobias Carrick found himself... cursing the morning sun that blazed through the floor-to-ceiling windows. His eyes had barely opened when he felt the pounding in his head. The throbbing pain would typically be unwelcome, but today, it brought a clarity he desperately needed.

He knew his head was pounding—of that was certain. But as for everything else—where he was, what he did—he had no recollection. When he felt someone stirring in the bed behind him, his eyes jolted open wide. Another mystery unsolved... who was he with?

An audible groan filled the air—one that didn’t belong to him - and Tobias’s eyes darted around the well-appointed bedroom, desperately seeking anything that might jog his memory. Something that would make the upcoming conversation a little less awkward, but there was nothing. Not a single memory was stirred and he wondered, just how much did he have to drink?

Conceding that discomfort was inevitable, Tobias decided to bite the bullet. Ignoring the queasiness rising within him, he sat up and turned to his side, finding an incredibly handsome—if somewhat worse for wear—man seated on the edge of the bed. Even with long locks obscuring most of his face, it was clear this specimen was genetically blessed. And his torso indicated countless trips to the gym made up for whatever genetics may have denied him, only adding to his allure.

“Hey,” Tobias said with a graveled voice, causing the stranger to jump. “Sorry... didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s all right,” the man replied with a foreign accent Tobias tried to place. “I was just hoping you’d stay asleep a little longer.”

“Really?” Tobias replied. “Why’s that?”

The man turned with a sheepish grin and a delicate blush creeping onto his cheeks as his hazel eyes met Tobias's aqua-blue ones. “I was hoping you’d stay asleep so I could try to remember who you were.... perhaps take a photo to do a Google search.”

Tobias erupted into his trademark raucous laughter, only to halt when he realized it was causing immense pain—not only to himself but to his handsome bedmate as well.

“Would it be disappointing if I told you I was glad to hear that?” He replied with a slight grimace.

“Really?” The stranger responded with a raised brow. “And why is that?”

“Because I'm still trying to figure out who you are,” Tobias chuckled. He extended his hand with a disarming grin. “Tobias, Tobias Carrick. And you are?”

“Trystan,” the man replied with relief. “Trystan Thorne. It’s lovely to... uh... meet you?”

“So, Trystan, do you know where we are? Because if you do, you’re already one up on me.”

Trystan squinted as he looked around. “We’re at my place,” he confirmed. “Although... this is the guestroom.”

Tobias appeared shocked, given the size and opulence of the quarters. “Damn! If this is the spare room, what does your bedroom look like?"

Trystan peeked out from under his bangs with a sly grin. “Do you expect an invitation?”

Tobias barked out a laugh. It was rare for him to meet anyone he considered a match in the art of flirtation, and he was impressed.

“Slow down there, big boy! First, I’d just like to figure out how I got into this bedroom... we can take the rest from there.”

“I don't quite recall," Trystan chuckled. "I think I'll need a heavy dose of caffeine before I figure that out... but the last thing I remember was being at the Pride parade...”

“New York!” Tobias snapped his fingers. “I'm visiting New York for the weekend.”

“Wow,” Trystan astounded, “You hadn’t even remembered that much?”

“Hey, I’m just waking up!” Tobias assured. “Pride parade... pride parade...” he mumbled. “I remember. After I went to Marie’s Crisis to get a drink...”

“Yes! I was there... and I told everyone I was hosting a post-Pride party at my place.”

“Ah!” Tobias realized. “That explains how I ended up here. Well, at your apartment, that is not necessarily how I would up in your guest bed with you.”

“I’m not sure either,” Trystan continued. “I’ve never slept in this room. The only reason I can think of would be...” he stopped with a gasp, his eyes filled with horror. “Oh, no!”

“What?” Tobias asked anxiously.

“I was absolutely done for the night... too much partying, too much drink... I told the butler to oversee things until all the guests had left. I needed to retire for the evening.”

“And?”

“I stumbled to my room and opened the door to find my sister, Astrid, and her latest girlfriend in flagrante delicto...in my bed!” Trystan winced. “I’m going to have to purchase a new mattress!”

“Or, you could just wash the sheets,” Tobias laughed.

“You, sir, have never met my sister, Astrid, or you’d understand. The sheets will be dissolved in acid, and a new mattress is a must.”

“Damn. I’m not sure if I should be impressed with or scared of your sister,” he smirked.

“Perhaps a little of both. Anyway, I was so intoxicated even that horror didn’t fully rouse me, so I stumbled to this room and found you snoring.”

Tobias was appalled. "Hey! I don’t snore!”

Trystan found that endearing and immediately decided to let him off the hook.

“To be honest, I was in no condition to be a reliable witness. You may well be right. I tried to wake you... but you were out cold... wouldn’t budge an inch. So I pushed you to the side, put a blanket over us, and passed out myself.”

“So... we didn’t...”

“Since our pants are still on, I’m pretty sure we didn’t.”

“There’s no pretty sure here,” Tobias said with a cocky grin. “If we had... you would have remembered. Trust me.”

Trystan shook his head with a smile. “I’m afraid we’re going to have to exit this room at once. Your ego appears to be at least as enormous as mine, and having them both in a room of this size must be a fire hazard, according to the NYPD."

Tobias threw his legs over the side of the bed, recovering his shirt from the floor as Trystan carefully surveyed the sculpted contours of his unexpected guest's back, chest, and arms. Would it be wrong to ask him to remove the shirt again?

"So," he cleared his throat. "I'd normally offer to make breakfast, but I have no idea what condition I'll find this place in. But there is a lovely cafe down the street, they do a lovely brunch on Sundays - would you care to join me?"

Tobias leaned over the bed with a playful smirk. "Trystan, are you asking me out on a date?"

The normally unflappable prince appeared flustered, words hard to come by. "I'm asking you to brunch," he finally grinned. "And perhaps to Macy's to mattress shop once I'm assured Astrid has vacated the premises. Are you in or out?"

"You had me at Brunch," Tobias chuckled. "But throw in mattress shopping, and how can I say no."

"Good," Trystan grinned. "I think we're at the start of a memorable day."

@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

Tagging others separately.

[vladr2566]

It's finally here well part one of the fic!! This is my first fiction so please go easy on me lol and ik this first part is short pleas bare with me my computer had bugged out and I lost all the parts so I'm starting back at square one

⚠️⚠️⚠️CW WARNING: SMUT GORE STRONG LANGUAGE AGE GAP Mention OF ABUSE AND ASSULT DEATH MENTION OF SA AND CANNIBALISM CULTS AND HEAVY TOPICS OF RELIGIOUS ABUSE! AND UNPROTECTED SEX (mostly in later parts) YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED Reader is 23 and slayer is at least 500 years old(basied on what i googled and the events of eternal)⚠️⚠️⚠️

Fem!reader x doom slayer

Hell's little rabbit part 1

Hell's little Rabbit

Part 1

You don't know how or when it happened but the cult of God had gotten their hands on you, they found you interesting, your rabbit ears, your rabbit tail, your rabbit feet. They never saw a human rabbit hybrid, well a hybrid in general. They kept you locked up in a dark damp cell in the abandoned jail they called home on this demon infested earth. They worshiped God who had abandoned them long ago, before the demons attacked.

Their leader, Peter, would take care of you. He would visit daily and give you food and water and in return you had to give yourself to him or he would beat you till you complied. He would preach on how yiu were special and was ment to dave them. You hated him, wanted him dead even but last time you tried to kill Peter he had broken your arm. His wives didn't like you because you were his favorite, they called you freak and whore, other times they would sneak in and beat you.

Today was a special day, the day of sacrifice, and you were the chosen one. You were kept alive for 13 years just for this, to be sacrifice to the demons so the cult could be blessed by the God they believed in. It was rainy today the first rain in years. Peter ties your arms on a cross and kissed you on last time, you grimace and spat in his face which earned yiu a harsh slap across the face.

He turns to his people and spoke, "Childern of God! Today we gather here today to feed the beast that plague us, and our way of living! Let us bow our heads in prayer and let us pray to our lord and savor Jesus Christian , and the one almighty God!"

They lowered their head as Peter leads them in prayer, "OH heavenly father who art tho in heaven! Please let this sacrifice keep the demon at bay for another 13 years, thank you for letting us find this girl when we did! She was 10 years old and lost, she was just a child when we took her in and now she is a woman! Still pure because she served me, her husband, very well! May her sacrifice keep us safe and my her soul join you in heaven! I know she is different from the others but may her rabbit genetics satisfy the demons! Amen!"

"Amen!" The others said in unison. The days passed as Peter and the other higher ups for the cult watch and waited for the demons. You were weak and exhausted, barely hanging on. The heat and the weather doing its toll on your body.

It's now been a week and nothing, it was scary quite. Then there was screams, you couldn't care you was ready to die. After an hour or so the screaming stops, you heard heavy footsteps approach but was too weak to lift your head. You felt a strong hand lift your head and you see a man or thing in green armor. He cut your hands free and you fell into his arms, that's all you remembered before passing out.

You woke up in a bed, how long has it been? Hours? Days? Weeks? You weren't sure but you sure knew you were hungry, you looked around the room you were now in. It confused and scared you, you had no clue where you was but something caught your eye. You get up and hobbled over to the small table in the corner and grabbed the sandwich that was left, your hunger overpowered your thoughts and you scarfed down the small meal.

You then looked at yourself in the mirror and saw you were bandaged up and somewhat clean. Your ears perked up as you heard footsteps and walked in a robot? You grabbed the plate from the table and get ready to throw it.

"Who are you and where am i?!" You demanded

"Hello, I am Vega the on board AI. The slayer brought you in after he had found you on earth. How are you feeling miss, need anything?" He asked

You shake your head no and slightly relaxed.

"No thank you..."

"If you need anything let me know miss, this room has a bathroom so if you want you can shower." And with that Vega left. You made your way to the bathroom and saw some clean clothes, fresh bandages, and some soaps as well as shampoo and conditioner.

You smiled and took the first shower you had in years, you washed off the dirt and old blood and then spent a lot of time on washing your matted hair. One your done you get out and then cut your hair short so it's easier to manage.

You could hear the same heavy footsteps out In the hall so you got dressed and left the room. You peaked out and saw the large man in green armor your savoir. You quietly followed him but he disappeared into his room. You wanted to thank him but how?

[raidante]

As soon as I finished my ask I saw you went to the hospital, Idk what happened but sincerely hope you're doing better now

I am!! Honestly if anyone wants to know it was honestly a really weird out of pocket thing. I'm a disabled person, who suffers from scoliosis and arthiritis and other physical defencicies because genetics and idk, I'm just the unlucky one of my family (immune disorders and bone issues also run in my family).

I already had a struggle at the beginning of August where my muscles became extremely inflammed for no apparent reason (at the time my doctor hypothosized it was perhaps the beginning of an immune disorder forming as a reaction to me getting sick the week prior to it) and it rendered me more or less paralyzed. My limbs were weak, my legs were weak, my entire back was too weak to support my body. I couldn't walk, I could barely stand, and I could not get up if I sat down. I couldn't even open a ziplock back because my hamstrings were just Not responding (I could not bend my arms and grip things). But after 2 days of rest it slowly loosened up and I was like okay. weird. scary. lets hope this doesn't happen again? (also it made me take a week off work and I was paid in pennies for that, so financially it was even a worse issue LOL).

but a month later (2 weeks ago from now), it happened AGAIN. My original choice of action was like ok. I guess Ill try sleeping this off again too. But i ended up falling really hard on my side the next day getting up so I couldn't do anything; even crawling was extremely painful. Called my dad, whos like in his 60s and im over 200 pounds so he couldn't lift me and it ended with me calling the paramedics and getting lifted to the hospital and I was wheelchair bound as they took my vitals and it turns out I was lethally low on potassium which meant my body was paralyzed and if I tried sleeping it off I would have passed away in my sleep bc my heart would have slowed down until it stopped!!! so... a good thing I ended up falling? Otherwise I would have died later that night.

They kept me overnight on ivs to get my potassium back up to par and it hasnt really dipped since then. The weird thing is it was spontaneous; nothing in my diet and in my habits besides like...mental stress (work cut the budget so I literally havent had a shift in a month since today and have been living off my life savings and friends' donations to help me stay afloat w rent.,..its Bad. Ive been trying to get disability stuff filled but they make it REALLY TOUGH even when you are disabled like I am) but that isn't even enough of a factor for such a lethal drop. They said it appeared to be a slow gradual drop in potassium too instead of like a quick sudden one, which was why I was slowly going paralyzed over the course of a few days rather than just it happening suddenly (and if it dropped suddenly I'd have had a heart attack and died, so). Went to my PCP, he has no idea. Got so much blood drawn these past few weeks I now have a permanent needle and discoloration scar from where the IV drip was, lol, and I JUST scheduled with a kidney doctor since potassium is processed through kidneys, so...maybe Ill get an answer. Desperately searching google and the only real thing that comes up is this very rare like 1% disease that just is your body slowly begins to struggle processing potassium on its own and usually medications fix that... but idk how I'd even have that since nothing like that runs in my family.

Needless to say it was very weird, very frightening, and most of all financially FRUSTRATING. My insurance covered everything bc im extremely broke, but not working at all for like a month straight on top of it has absolutely devastated me and sapped out all my creativity</3 THAT SAID! I am trying to stir myself to draw again!!!!! I have ideas!!!!! i wanna DRAW! WRITE! Its just a matter of..getting myself to do it. And also there's a league of legends event so Ive been grinding out the battlepass since Ive been on standby for work shifts for a fucking month, lol.

also as for the cat!! Kitty i kept for 2 weeks and my sister and her husband took the kitty from me saturday because theyre gonna try adopting her! and if it doesnt work out theyre gonna help find a suitable home for her. She was very cute and I fed her everyday played with her gave her baths and slept with her and she definitely helped me feel a bit more Normal during such an abnormal time in my life. Here's a pic I took of her while she was hanging out w me!

she had very big sad eyes and a very squeaky meow

[jumpywhumpywriter]

Hey! Hope you're doing well! This may be off topic (hell if I know), but I have a bit of an oddly specific inquiry about the race Shadow is (Falkry? That was the name right?), specifically the biology (I think that's what it would be)

Specifically-specifically, the wings... okay I know that probably doesn't make much sense, but the context is that I learned that wing shape heavily influence how a creature (race? human? person?) flys through the environment. I can't explain it much more, but, in short, what are the wing shapes? Are they one type of wing throughout all or do they differ based on what each culture would have been (since they're, uh, extinct kinda? In your world anyways)? Shape? Size? Any other features? Just for some more reference, this is what I mean (and also sparked my curiosity/thoughts) https://preview.redd.it/yh9fkr515i321.png?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=221c8cac62659ee3e87f58c00a7cc76e2112aebc Not sure if you can access reddit even, but otherwise, just Google search "wing types real life reference for world building" and go to images. Feel free to answer in as much or as little detail as you want (or just straight infodump with unstructured word vomit, that's cool too! My personal favorite too! The content, not the, er, vomit) Anyways, hope you're having a good day/night, are taking care of yourself, staying hydrated, eating your favorite snack and all that jazz :) -idk

Wow, this a VERY interesting question! And I have a spectacularly long answer for you! (I also included a few pictures at the bottom of this post of the very specific anatomy a Falkry has -- the art is not mine, but it perfectly shows the skeletal and muscular structure of Falkry wings, also showing how the muscles and bone structure move and shift during flight which I thought might be helpful. You might have to zoom in though to read all the descriptive writing explaining each muscle and its purpose)

Now on to the explanation: You are absolutely correct in that wing shape heavily influences how creatures fly. And yes, there are different wing types among Falkry. BUT, they do not differ too greatly -- the differences are more subtle. For example, no Falkry has short-flight-type wings (shorter and stubbier meant for short bursts of flight in real-life birds rather than gliding/soaring - like chickens and turkeys). They always have larger, broader wings like eagles to be able to stay airborne, especially since they are human-sized (which means big wings to get them in the air).

To perhaps word it better, the differences I mentioned are more like hawk vs falcon-type wings (hawks have broad wings, falcons have thin and narrow ones for better maneuverability, but there are a ton of closer similarities between those two types than for hawk-shaped wings vs chicken-shaped wings. Make sense?)

A Falkry's genetics determine a lot about wing shape & structure. Shadow, for example, has wings that are powerful but slightly slimmer/more tapered and narrow than most other Falkry (genetic anomaly that works to her advantage). Her wing shape is a cross between hawk & falcon-types. She is a super fast flier because of this, and can out-fly anyone she races. She also has elite aerial maneuverability because of her falcon-like wings and can make sharp twists, turns, and abrupt changes of direction in the air that most other Falkry would have a hard time doing.

It means she's good at dodging & weaving through tight spaces and has a significant evasive advantage in aerial training combat against Falkry with broader wings who can't make those sharp twists she can and are slower to make turns.

But Falkry with bigger, wider wings than Shadow, on the other hand, would have an advantage in long-distance flight & journeys because they would have an easier time soaring and gliding on air currents, conserving energy by avoiding unnecessary flapping. Each wing-type helps in different ways, and each has its advantages & disadvantages.

Physical fitness has a lot to do with things too. For example, a Falkry with broad wings (designed for soaring) might still be able to beat someone with shorter and narrower ones (designed for speed) in a race if their muscles are stronger. But Shadow in particular is very physically active, even when's she's not punching people's noses in (LOL), and so she has a lot of built up endurance and raw power, along with loads of flight experience and skill on her side which is part of what makes her so dangerous.

Thanks for your ask! I hope I was able to answer it good enough (and if not, you can always send a 2nd ask too for more information -- I won't take offense)

Here's the pictures of all the anatomy a Falkry has!

[prozac]

what mods do you recc for the sims 2 btw :0!

STEP ONE: DOWNLOAD SIMPE.

Step two: Rest of this post <3

https://pleasantsims.com/sims-2-mods/ + Her current defaults

This is a really good place to start!!! I would download her "anti-corruption" mods and her essential mods (except maybe ACR, I have ACR but I super have it edited so its less ridiculous). However, I download a lot of these!!! (Not any of the miscarriage ones tho they make me too sad to play with ahahaha). Also, she has tutorials on her YouTube for downloading mods and such if youre having trouble.

"Creaturefixes" is also REALLY REALLY GOOOOD, You NEED that if you want to play with occultism in any way (ESPECIALLY ALIENS!!) I think (If I remember correctly) this is the version I use. Also, I use an equal genetics mod to make it more likely to have alien genetics passed down (There are multiple versions of these, Im sure a bit of googling can find you what you need.)

On the topic of occults, you totally need a Multi-PT mod. Theres a bunch out there, but I believe PleasantSims has one listed that I do think is really fantastic.

Another place I often get mods and cc

DOWNLOAD CLEAN TEMPLATES OF THE NEIGHBORHOODS! It fixes a bunch of issues with the game especially if you plan on playing multiple generations.

Some good sims 2 simblrs on here that have a lot of info & CC on their blogs are @/lazyduchess, @/poppet-sims, @/midgethetree, @/deedee-sims, @/pooklet (these default face templates are great!!! (These Blogs are the ones off the top of my head)

TOTALLY SEEMS OVERWHELMING I KNOW But Its so worth it bc (IMO) The Sims 2 is really fun and chaotic if you love playing rotational and managing a little world! It can be outdated, it is turning 20 years old this year, but theres a reason it is so iconic as a game (its just really really fun.)

Explore and find what you like! The Sims 2 Simblr community is pretty organized and theyre always discovering new things in the code of the game.

Oh, and watch this YouTube video. Seriously

[choiceswithmika]

Intro!

Never done a intro about myself so lets do that :))

Hi to new people checking my account out, My names Mikaylyn!! I've been on choices since 2021 but it's been a year since I got active on it, My favorite choices book is the Freshman and favorite lover is Zig Ortega :)).

Zig is my life and its been a year since that happen :). Recently I got into RC and Hodge as my favorite RC lover.

Let's do some irl facts then shall we?

I am an autistic individual who taking a major Psychology, I like editing and writing fanfics in my free time, I also love going on choices and rc in my free time along side watching YouTube. I also like talking to close friends also in my free time. My birthday is June 23rd, I am lowkey a k-pop Stan ;,)). I am obsessed with Sanrio and Fictional life always makes me happy :). I'll take any irl personal questions from my inbox if wanting to know more. But I'll answer some obvious ones so no one doesnt have to ask.

How old are you? = I am 18 currently but turning 19 this year!

What are your goals? = Have a certain degree to help individuals with disabilities as I have

What kind of apps do you use? = I use pics art for all edits, in shots for fanfics length , pure writer for fanfics on insta, wattpad, google docs and AO3 are for fanfics use for series

Favorite type of food and drink? = I like water the most and eating noodles :)))

What is autism? = Autism is a developmental disorder that affects communication and learning with handling social interactions, repeated behavior, etc. I have genetic autism and diagnosed when I was 5-6 of age.

I think thats all I have :)) thanks for reading and hope it helps get to know me better :))

[potroasttheghostdog]

Being on the spectrum, and having weird interests is actually crazy sometimes. Just scratching an itch leads you down an hours long rabbit hole of discovery and wikipedia pages. For me, one of my more mundane interests is fruits, plants, and botany.

I was eating an orange. Just chilling, while feeding my dog. I wondered what my favorite orange (cara cara) was a crossbreed from (it's *gotta* be blood and navel right it's so tasty but distinct from other oranges, can't be a valencia the color's not right!)

So I looked it up. Turns out, there's like 600 of these bastards. Well let's fucking read about all of them.

Oh Ermelo's orange. That sounds weird. What's that.

Oh it's just called that because takes its name from 'Ermelo', a parish in Arcos de Valdevez Municipality, Portugal. It was introduced to the region by Cistercian monks in the 12th century, but it is sweeter than the average orange. Oh, but it's on The Ark of Taste.

What the fuck is that.

Well, turns out it's kinda like the Endagered Wildlife registry, but for sustainably sourced heritage foods and local cuisines. They see local foods as tantamount to cultural landmarks that should be preserved and foods go on the list if they are either impotant orbrelevant to a specific culture or ethnoregion, or are in danger of dying out whether from extinction or a fading cultural relevancy. They urge the perpetuation of their existence by encouraging their continued consumption. This includes foodstuffs like fruit from extremely specific regions, breads, cheeses, and even certain breeds of livestock that meat comes from.

Here's some fun ones: classic mortadella of all things (because it originates in Italy and has been a staple of their cuisine for centuries) cuccalar (a specific type of italian bread) casu marzu (a gross kind of cheese, do not google if you have a weak stomach) carosello (an italian melon), Lake Michigan Whitefish, Gravenstein Apples, Mayhaw jelly, bogong moths, and bunya nuts. They have things on the list from all over the world and it's actually really gratifying knowing that someone somewhere can see whatever random little thing you have and see everywhere, is valued, because it represemts a culture that not everyone has. I've had Lake Michigan whitefish. I consider it just a fish. But it's on a list of important culture for the US that should be conserved for the sake of culture, and that's kind of eye opening.

The Ark of Taste is run by Slow Food.

Ok. What the fuck is that.

Turns out it's an international org dedicated to preserving cultural foodstuffs that also emphasizes sustainability by supporting eating, growing, and traditional cooking local foods. Think Audobon but for cheese.

What was I reading about? Oh right, oranges. Oh the chocolate orange has a 12 Brix.

Ok.

What the fuck is a Brix.

Turns out Degrees Brix (°Bx) is the measure of dissolved solids in liquids and aqueous solutions, but is used to measure sugar content in foods and juices in common. So like Scoville scale but for sugar. Honey, soda, wine, sugar, fruit juice, fruits, and maple syrup use it to measure their sugar content. There's also some other scales that are used for sugar measuring. The Plato Scale (°P) is used in brewing, The Oechsle Scale used on german and swiss wine, and the Balling Scale, which is the oldest and not commonly used anymore.

What was I reading about? Oh yeah oranges.

Oh Smith Red Valencia. Sounds sultry.

It's a pigmented bud sport of the valencia orange tree.

K.

What's a bud sport.

Turns out a bud sport is any kind of sudden morphological difference growing from a plant caused by genetic mutation. Like when a dwarf pine starts growing foliage branches that are morpholigically identical to a regular pine. You ever notice how sometimes your christmas tree, if you get a live one, has irregular branches where they grow out longer than normal, and the needles are a bit different than the rest of the tree? Bud sport. Neat. Oh it's night time.

What was I reading about? Oh yeah. Oranges.

Yeah turns out I was right, cara caras are the hybrid of blood and navels. Knew it. Also, apparently oranges aren't even the original thing. They started out as a hybrid between pomelos and mandarins. Also, also, apparently fruit genomes have "moms and dads", i.e. the chloroplast genome is considered the "maternal line" of a fruit's ancestry. The orange's chloroplast genome comes from pomelos, meaning pomelos are the orange's "mother".

Also---

[purplesimmer455]

People you'd like to get to know better tag. ✨️

Thanks so much for the tag @theosconfessions. 😊💛

Last song: I had to check YouTube because I listened to 8 billion this morning, and its Say Anything's In your eyes. 😄

Favorite color: Oh man, it's still purple although I also love yellow, blue, pink, and green. 🌈

Currently watching: The Summer I turned pretty and And Just Like That.

Last movie: Red, White, and Royal Blue. It's amazing as hell and I want to read the book too. 😍 I kept gasping out loud at the cuteness.

Last book: One Last Stop by Casey McQuiston. (😱😍😄 I love it so much). Random not-so-mini backstory: I based my sim Cameron Kang on Jane Su from the book. Jane is this 24 year old punk rock leather jacket wearing lesbian from the 70s stuck in a time loop thing on the Brooklyn Q train, and is helped by our main character August Landry who's cynical in love but starts to fall for Jane.

Originally I was going to have Piper date a guy sim I made, but I went into the Kang household and made a sister from Cecilia Kang's genetics based sort of on Jane's style and liked the name Cameron for her. Then I was like oh dang what if Piper meets Cam at a party and they hit it off and start dating, and thus their relationship began and it's still going strong. 😊 sorry for the rambling I'm just so obsessed with this book, as you can tell. 😅

Sweet/savory/spicy: Spicy.

Last thing Googled: 😳 Well, okay. This is embarrassing because I just raved about it for 8 million paragraphs, but One Last Stop. 😅

Current obsession: Oh man, at this point it's going from a get to know me to a get to know my love for this one book. 🥴 But yeah, the same as what I Googled: One Last Stop

Currently working on: Well, I'd have to say my random as heck sims posts. Right now I'm focusing on Piper and Cam because they're really cute together and I like writing cheesy but sweet dialogue for them.

Okay, I feel like I'd better stop writing before I ramble for 8 paragraphs more about One Last Stop or my sims because dang once I start writing about that I end up rambling. 😅

I want to tag @pink-chevalier @justkeeponsimming @coliemoongaming @izayoichan @gingerbeardmansim @ophswhim @hypanova @silwermoon-sims @silverspringsimmer @nightlifeseries @thereesespiece @weisskralle and anyone else who wants to do the tag. 😊

[dearfuturehusbandblog]

Let's Add to the Crap Pile

Dear Future Husband,

I'm broke. Have we ever discussed that? I don't remember for sure, though I think I may have mentioned it...

Anywho, the pain is still here.

It could be an ovarian issue, it could be a kidney issue, it could be dehydration, it could be a random pain that will go away on its own. But you know what, I'll never know! Because I can't afford health care. Because my ObamaDoesntCare has been pending for three years, despite my being reassured by the ObamaDoesntCare people that there's nothing that should be holding it up and of course it'll go through this time.

Wouldn't it be funny if this "looking for my beshert" blog turned into a "watch me die a slow death" blog?

On top of that, my bank account overdrew yesterday because I had a couple of bills that were paid automatically and I hadn't checked my account before to make sure there were enough funds there.

Now here's the kicker - I work for a small business and I've been gifted the wonderful role of paying myself for the work I do, which I zelle from my boss's account.

But, you see, I grew up in a dysfunctional and poor family with parents who did not instill in me a healthy relationship with money. And paying myself feels super weird, because I have to keep track of my own hours and when I track my time, even two minutes at work that aren't spent on work things feels like I'm stealing. I used to track my time by literal minutes, but when I first started working there, my boss would round up to the hour for pay. So now I round up to the hours. And that means if I'm paying myself for an hour, but part of that hour was spent on something non-work related, I feel like I'm stealing from my boss.

So I get weird about paying myself and I forget to do it. And it feels weird to do it at the beginning or in the middle of the week, so if I forget before Shabbos, I push it off to the next erev Shabbos. And at some point it's been like a month since I've been paid and my account gets overdrawn. Like a smart person.

But here's why I'm writing about all this now:

My boss apparently got a new phone and since it's not a recognized device, she had issues logging into her banking app and it completely locked her out.

So I can't even pay myself this week until she resolves that issue.

So the TL;DR is: my account is overdrawn and I can't pay my bills because I'm the one who pays myself and I'm so weird about money that I can't even pay myself like a normal person and pushed it off so long that I need the money this week because I live paycheck to paycheck and I can't even get a paycheck this week because of stupid tech issues.

My god, I'm a mess.

It's one thing to know it, but it's another thing to say these things "out loud" and see it from a normal person's perspective."

Either way, I can't afford medical care, so whatever this back pain issue is, it better go away on its own because I can't afford any other option.

-LivelyHeart

I googled it and there's something called Chronic Kidney Disease, which is apparently not reversible, and comes along with things like obesity (check) and high blood pressure (check).

My obesity is most likely tied in with two things - (1) stress and (2) food sensitivities.

My high blood pressure is most likely tied in with three things - (1) stress, (2) obesity, and (3) there's actually a genetic component for it on MotherLivelyHeart's side.

It's so funny how stress can cause obesity and obesity can cause stress. And my whole life is stress, so even when I try to get healthy, the stress is always there.

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

By: Charles Love

Published: May 3, 2023

When my family and I were planning our move to New York City, we had a list of criteria that was important to us in choosing a home. The list included things like commute time, nearby amenities, and neighborhood feel, but the quality of the neighborhood school for our son topped the list. We did Google searches, read reviews, and asked friends and associates for suggestions. We finally settled on the school he now attends. In the fall of 2020, my son started kindergarten.

But he had only been in school a few weeks when I noticed something odd in the lesson plan. They announced that, for the first time, they would be teaching STEM in kindergarten, and the first lesson was, "Women in STEM," by which they meant, women and minorities had been marginalized in STEM. This was apparently very important. My son was four.

I requested a meeting with the teacher and questioned the appropriateness of the lesson. But the teacher and principal couldn't see my point, because women have been marginalized in STEM, as they took turns patiently explaining to me. It's real, was the point they made over and over.

"So is murder and rape but you wouldn't teach that to kindergarteners!" I shot back, to little effect.

But while the lesson wasn't age-appropriate, this wasn't even my biggest concern. Lessons like these are part of the DEI program—the diversity, equity, and inclusion agenda that's been infecting institutions across the U.S. of late. This agenda is designed to eliminate racism (though racism is viewed as "structural" and thus, paradoxically, incurable), and in the school setting, it's ostensibly designed to close achievement gaps. But more often than not, these efforts don't involve raising up those impacted by real racism and real academic gaps between the wealthy and everyone else; they instead drag everyone else down, canceling achievement benchmarks or eliminating standards altogether.

Many of the concerns about DEI challenge its morality, claiming it is racist against whites or trying to force equity of outcomes, and they aren't wrong. But again, that's not the real danger. The greater risk is that this approach can be harmful to the very students it is designed to help.

And my son, the only black kid in his class, is one of them.

Teaching him STEM at an early age would of course have my blessing. It might indeed help close the race gap in these coveted positions. But instead of teaching him STEM, the school decided to teach him to see himself and the girls in his class as marginalized. How does that help him? Creating engagement and making the subject fun is far more effective than telling children that people who looked like them were excluded in the past.

And this was far from the only time I experienced the unintended consequences of DEI. After a lesson on Martin Luther King Jr., my son came home and told me he could be a slave. While in first grade, he told me that all the women and girls in Saudi Arabia get shot by the police. On a Zoom call discussing plans to roll out even more DEI initiatives, the principal told me that blacks—today, not in the past—are oppressed and are "genetically different from whites."

You can imagine what impact this can have on my son's education, being the only black student in his class, with leadership like this.

Things did improve. My son's principal retired, and the new principal had a much different approach. When the DEI agenda rears its ugly head these days, it's because it's being pushed by the Department of Education, not the teachers, and my complaints are at least heard out. I've had several meetings with the principal and teachers, and they have been positive, engaging, and effective.

But what about the rest of the district and the city at-large?

There is nothing wrong with trying to ensure that every student gets a quality education; indeed, this is an admirable goal. There is nothing wrong with focusing on students who need additional help. But it's wrong to assume all students have the same needs based on their race or gender. And it's harmful to be so focused on effecting change that you don't measure the results.

Good intentions mean nothing if the results are bad.

But though things are slightly better at my son's school these days and I have to worry less about him being taught to see himself as a disempowered victim, I worry deeply about the rest of New York City's public school kids, especially given what I see in the curriculum.

So I've decided to run for a seat on our local Community Education Council, the education policy advisory body responsible for reviewing and evaluating the district's educational programs, approving zoning lines, and holding public hearings.

I want to bring nuance to these difficult conversations. I don't want to ban anything—books, CRT, DEI, or anything else—but I also don't want any parent's concerns to be ignored. Everyone should have a voice, and things aren't as black or white as they seem.

Last week, a woman stopped me in front of my son's school. She wanted to know if I liked the school. She was considering pulling her son out of his current school because she didn't like the administration's approach to race.

I told her if that is why she's doing it, there's no use, because every school has the same directive, but if she addressed her concerns with the school and they did not listen, that was a reason to consider leaving.

She said she had and was ignored.

I want to be a voice for parents like her, who feel the school, or the DOE, isn't listening to their concerns.

In case you're wondering, like me, the mother was black.

Charles Love is the executive director of Seeking Educational Excellence, co-host of The Cut the Bull Podcast, and the author of "Race Crazy: BLM, 1619, and the Progressive Racism Movement."

==

the principal told me that blacks—today, not in the past—are oppressed and are "genetically different from whites."

Notwithstanding a 92-year old grandmother, and actual members of the KKK, most racist people are self-aware enough to try to hide their racism.

"Antiracists" don't just feel no shame, they actually feel proud and virtuous about sharing their racist views.

[thats-amnesty-babe]

Please note that many antipsychotics are known to actually CAUSE type two diabetes in people who take them long-term. It doesn’t have to just be genetic. Diabetes can be medication-induced. It is still just as permanent and lifelong.

I had normal A1C and fasting glucose levels in my yearly blood tests for my entire life before starting Vraylar (a second-generation antipsychotic, which my psychiatrist recommended to me because it had “milder” side effects than many other antipsychotics). Taking 3 mg of Vraylar each day for perhaps a year and a half landed me a full-blown diabetes diagnosis. I actually started tapering off of it (with my psychiatrist’s permission… not that I trust psychiatrists much anymore, anyway) very quickly after I was told about my diabetes diagnosis and then did some cursory googling. Turns out this shit is kind of COMMON KNOWLEDGE. And nobody told me.

Source: https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/drugs-vraylar-side-effects

This condition will never go away and will affect my health negatively for the rest of my life — in addition to the mental health effects of being unable to consume sugar without health anxiety.

At NO point did a psychiatrist or my general practitioner doctor I see for regular wellness visits EVER mention that this was a possibility to me. That a long-term health condition could come from taking a medication they prescribed to me. I actually saw two psychiatrists in the time period that I was taking this antipsychotic: the initial prescriber and then a different psychiatrist after I moved to another state. Talk about informed consent…

(Content warning for saneism, which is discrimination against people who are perceived as anything deviating from the average societal standards of being sane of mind… such as experiencing any form of psychosis.)

The wildest thing about this is that I do not technically even have a disabling long-term psychotic disorder! As in, nothing that has psychosis as its primary symptom. The frequency and severity of my psychosis symptoms are extremely correlated with my overall stress levels. I am actually in the best mental health state in my entire life now, and I have not experienced any psychotic symptoms at all for months.

It’s been maybe 9 months since I stopped taking Vraylar, and I’ve had only two days where I experienced ANY psychotic symptoms. I have complex PTSD (among other mental health conditions, which feel a little too personal for me to comfortably share publicly). C-PTSD commonly has mild psychosis as a symptom. With adequate treatment and significant progress toward recovery, the psychosis symptoms can actually go away. For me, they have.

I regularly experienced hallucinations and delusions for the majority of my life, since about the age of eight. With the help of a couple of damn good therapists and a whole lot of personal mental health work, I have learned how to navigate the world in a functional and successful manner, even while tolerating and coping with my psychotic symptoms. Which means… I probably never needed to be on Vraylar to begin with. The psychosis was never disabling, just unpleasant and something I could even ignore most of the time.

But, unfortunately, my psychiatrist was terrified to hear I experienced any amount of psychosis at all. It didn’t matter how much it affected my daily functioning or quality of life, nor how well I was able to emotionally cope with it after years of having those symptoms. She put me on a VERY risky and damaging medication because of saneism. And that cost me so fucking much.

You should always be honest with your doctors, right? Give them the full details and context of your symptoms so they are fully informed before making any healthcare decisions for you. But if you don’t want to take antipsychotics, just DO NOT tell them you have psychosis. I am so serious. I believe that every single person with any amount of psychosis reading this post needs to fully internalize this message. You are in control of what information you give your doctor. Be cautious and intentional about what you share. Decide before the appointment starts whether you will disclose your psychotic symptoms.

Do RESEARCH about antipsychotics and their potential long-term health effects before ever mentioning psychosis to any kind of medical professional. There is a good chance that a doctor (psychiatrist or not!) will prescribe you antipsychotics if they catch even a whiff of psychosis.

If you’re okay with that, then that’s fine — do what is best for your overall health, even if that means prioritizing mental health over physical health. Genuinely, take care of yourself in the way that makes sense for your personal goals of long-term wellness. Some people can learn to live with their psychosis. Some people are too distressed by their psychosis to have a personally acceptable quality of life. Whether or not antipsychotics are the right choice should be entirely up to the individual patient whenever possible. Of course, I do know that there are extreme situations where medical intervention is required, but I do think that most antipsychotic prescriptions would not fall under that category.

If you do spend the time to look up what there is to know about various antipsychotics, weigh the pros and cons, and believe that taking one is genuinely the best choice for you — and of course for some people it is; the drugs were developed for a reason, after all — then at least look at various options and pick out the one that seems the safest.

I desperately wish I could send a message to my younger self to PLEASE thoroughly research ANY new medication I am prescribed BEFORE letting it enter my body AT ALL. I am now so anxious about any new prescription I am given and read all about it immediately after the appointment ends. This was so avoidable, and now I’m stuck with it permanently.

Having psychosis means we have to be careful about who we tell. That is, if it’s a possible choice. I understand that many psychotic people cannot hide it, and there is no shame in that. But if you can hide it, that’s really helpful, because you can decide if it’s worth sharing before actually sharing that information — like to a doctor. When a symptom or diagnosis goes on your medical chart, everyone else who sees that chart (like any other doctors within the same medical system) will know you have that symptom. Having medically documented psychosis can severely affect how seriously doctors will take your future health concerns. Be careful, guys. Be safe.

I saw a comment on your blog that says 'the way you eat does not cause diabetes'...are you able to expand on that or provide a source I could read? I've been told by doctors that my pre-diabetes was due to weight gain because I get more hungry on my anti psychotics and I'd like to fact check what they've told me! Thank you so much!

Pre-diabetes was rejected as a diagnosis by the World Health Organization (although it is used by the US and UK) - the correct term for the condition is impaired glucose tolerance. Approximately 2% of people with "pre-diabetes" go on to develop diabetes per year. You heard that right - TWO PERCENT. Most diabetics actually skip the pre-diabetic phase.

There are currently no treatments for pre-diabetes besides intentional weight loss. (Hmm, that's convenient, right?) There has yet to be evidence that losing weight prevents progression from pre-diabetes to T2DM beyond a year. Interestingly, drug companies are trying to persuade the medical world to start treating patients earlier and earlier. They are using the term “pre-diabetes” to sell their drugs (including Wegovy, a weight-loss drug). Surgeons are using it to sell weight loss surgery. Everyone’s a winner, right? Not patients. Especially fat patients.

Check out these articles:

Prediabetes: The epidemic that never was, and shouldn’t be

The war on ‘prediabetes' could be a boon for pharma—but is it good medicine?

Also - I love what Dr. Asher Larmie @fatdoctorUK has to say about T2DM and insulin resistance, so here's one of their threads I pulled from Twitter:

1️⃣ You can't prevent insulin resistance. It's coded in your DNA. It may be impacted by your environment. Studies have shown it has nothing to do with your BMI.

2️⃣ The term "pre-diabetes" is a PR stunt. The correct term is impaired glucose tolerance (or impaired fasting glucose) which is sometimes referred to as intermittent hyperglycemia. It does not predict T2DM. It is best ignored and tested for every 3-5yrs.

3️⃣ there is no evidence that losing weight prevents diabetes. That's because you can't reverse insulin resistance. You can possibly postpone it by 2yrs? Furthermore there is evidence that those who are fat at the time of diagnosis fair much better than those who are thin.

4️⃣ Weight loss does not reverse diabetes in the VAST majority of people. Those that do reverse it are usually thinner with recent onset T2DM and a low A1c. Only a tiny minority can sustain that over 2yrs. Weight loss does not improve A1c levels beyond 2 yrs either.

5️⃣ Weight loss in T2DM does not improve macrovascular or microvascular health outcomes beyond 2 years. In fact, weight loss in diabetics is associated with increased mortality and morbidity (although it is not clear why). Weight cycling is known to impacts A1c levels.

6️⃣ Weight GAIN does NOT increase the risk of cardiovascular OR all causes mortality in diabetics. In fact, one might even go so far as to say that it's better to be fat and diabetic than to be thin and diabetic.

Dr. Larmie cites 18 peer reviewed journal articles (most from the last decade) that are included in their webinar on the subject, linked below.

[roguetiger-ao3]

Morning angsty thoughts

Sometimes, mostly when I am trying to work out something story related, I wonder about that strange, nebulous thing that is time in Wynonna Earp. It helps the show in a way that there are so little specific time markers to age up but goddamn, it makes it pretty frustrating when trying to write something.

I, and I feel a lot of people, mark time in the show by what years the season came out… “season 3, okay, Wynonna is 29 now” that kind of thing. In reality, we just don’t know as episodes that set the time of year are few.

There could be more but…

1x01 – It’s Sept 12th, we know this because Wynonna turns 27.

2x12 – Alice is born but there is (as far as I can remember) no mention of a date.

3x06 – It’s Christmas… what year, we don’t know.

3x12 – Waverly and Doc get snatched and taken to the garden and they don’t return until 4x02 over 18 months later.

4x08 – Halloween.

Then there is Vengeance where we learn that there has been somewhere over 5 years since 2x12 as Alice is 5. Proving that time isn’t passing to our time as 2x12 aired in 2017.

What does this all mean? Bugger all. I just woke up and got depressed thinking about poor Nicole having to spend Christmas alone. It made me think about those 18, nearly 19 months without her baby and how many holidays and special events she was alone.

18 months without her friends and family. Waverly, Wynonna and Doc were lost and she was left clinging to hope that Wynonna would be able to bring them all home. Nedley was, as far as she knew, dead. Jeremy had abandoned her. The people she had sworn to protect turned their backs on her. Her parents were long out of the picture and the town had been closed off so who knows if she could have called them even if she had wanted to.

That is all bad enough but then there are the markers of time that we didn’t get to see… how many of her own and Waverly’s birthdays did she mark off on the calendar. And you know damn well that someone like Nicole would probably breeze past their own but celebrate Waverly’s in some way because everyone else seemed to forget it.

Did she decorate the homestead for Christmas because Rachel was there and find the tampon angel tucked away in a box?

Vengeance ended with Waverly going off, assumingly before Christmas? Who can tell what time of year it was with the wonderful weather of Canada… from what I, a Brit can make out, snow can happen almost year round there o.O

Randy and Mercedes were ice fishing though and he ended by saying that fishing season was over which, after a quick google, that can end any time around March so is Waverly going to be gone over a year!?

Can their marriage survive that amount of time, hell yeah, that I don’t doubt. Like Wynonna said to Waverly, Nicole isn’t selfish. What I do worry about, even with Wynonna and Nedley there to help (and possibly Rachel wherever she is) is Nicole’s mental health. Anyone watching the show for the first time with Vengeance doesn’t know any of what happened before. They don’t know about that time apart or that Nicole can’t leave Purgatory because she swore to be its shield. If Waverly gets in trouble while she’s helping Jeremy, Nicole can’t do anything other than sit and wait again.

Okay, after that little dip into my angst filled waking thoughts, I am going to leave my rambling here and go think about how much action those stairs are going to see when Waverly gets home… maybe then they can possibly talk about the K word.

And as a fandom are we thinking Waverly’s reluctance is just that she’s not feeling as maternal (I can relate to that)… childhood trauma… or that she worries about Dark Angel coming out if the kid is being naughty… or what angel genetics could mean for a child if it was part hers?

[fireangelsstuff-inactive-2024]

Well the best place to start is with the basics

Like all other languages the words are made up of smaller pieces

In a way Te Reo is in a very small way similar to Japanese in its construction If you are familiar with the hiragana and katakana writing systems it may help your understanding somewhat

I use Japanese as an example purely because it is a more widely known example than its pacific neighbours

An interesting point to make while mentioning this is that it is thought that the pacific migration started out of far eastern Asian from a particular part of Japan and a link has been made using genetic studies, though any language family links are yet to be fully determined it may well turn out to be a descendant of a very old form of Japanese (Pre Han chinese influence) if able to be traced further than the current studies of migration throughout the pacific

Much like the writing systems mentioned above Te Reo is made up of a particular sounds and has an alphabet of a similar nature

Rather than attempt to explain "ng" I have instead put in a link below to a video of the Te Reo alphabet song I learned at school as a child

You can imagine the cringe way Te Reo sounds being pronounced by an american accented GPS system (Google needs to fix that, hire me I'll do an "Alexa", just fix it...)

Onehunga (oh-ne-huhng-ah) gets turned into One hunger 🤮

While Te Reo nearly came close to being lost its lasting influence on my own native tongue is not to be missed

New Zealand English is the reason for the Kiwi accent

While many may not realise it New Zealanders do speak English differently to nearly every other english speaking country and this is due to the inclusion of what is considered a native vowel sounds being used in place of the regular enunciation of typical english vowel sounds

This is the reason behind the kiwi accent being so distinct

We pronounce vowels differently due to Te Reo influence

[paranoir-antares]

https://www.tumblr.com/paranoir-antares/744206544089088000/scientists-are-now-working-on-developing

Yea yes we have heard of the unethical experiments torturing lab animals in various ways for this very classically conservative goal of making babies to inherit some stupid lineage, by putting female sex organs in males and male sex organs in female people

So stunning how specific and detailed the science gets on what sex organ does what when it’s time to figure out how to get the man who thinks he’s a woman what he wants. But then it all goes Poof when it’s time to talk about actual women, or homosexuality or anything useful to someone who isn’t him.

And what are they doing about extremely common debilitating conditions affecting primarily or only female people? Very little.

while i mostly agree with you, anon, i have to add in my thoughts

so let's say that these experiments somehow turn out 100% successful and we create perfectly functional artificial female reproductive systems (press 'X' for doubt)

and then what? they implant it in a transwoman, whose male brain doesn't plot for the existence of a uterus and ovaries in its body plan, who doesn't have any sort of genetic, cellular, or otherwise physiological mechanism¹ for the formation of ova. so now there's a whole uterus that the body cannot recognize as a part if itself nor functionally utilize in any way.

to what use? is this not absolute 100% frivolity? the hypothetical installation of an entire organ system that has ZERO function in the host body?

meanwhile, rough estimates² say that about 5–10% of women develop endometriosis and 5–20% of women develop polycystic ovarian syndrome. the general consensus for causes, diagnosis, and management of these potentially debilitating female-specific disorders is "well, they sure do exist. have you considered that you're making it up, though?"

so, on one side, you have between a tenth and a fifth of all the world's women, for whom research into uterine and ovarian physiology could save lives from illness; on the other side, you have a few men who really really want to have a uterus that does nothing but internally validate their belief system. priorities?

--------

¹ maybe there's a conceivable way to deactivate all Y-chromosome/SRY/other sex specification and somehow convert male somatic cells into something that could become a germinate cell line? i don't know

² quick googling, didn't go too deep into the numbers, but the first few results gave these numbers when i skimmed through

[typhin-hoofbun]

This is pretty similar to my path in life, except I knew I wasn't truly human inside before I knew I wasn't a guy. They were both pretty early, but I felt the species dysphoria well before I felt the gender dysphoria.

Hoo boy, this turned out to be a LONG one. Soooo, gonna try to use one of those "Keep Reading" breaks and hope it works. (I'm still pretty new to Tumblr. Sorry if this is a giant block of horribleness.) Copy/paste into Google Docs says this is 2648 words after the break.

When I was a little kid, and grown-ups asked "what I wanted to be when I grew up", I answered things like "A mother", "A teacher", and "A programmer". Like, "If I can't be a programmer, I'd want to be a teacher". (Worth noting, I don't think I'd had a single male teacher at that point.) Sure, I was aware I should be a girl, but I wasn't really feeling the pain of it yet.

But at the same time, I was going through every book in the school library I could find on Greek mythology, because of all the transformation stuff in it. I was grabbing any book with a non-human main character, or just prominent ones. I was glued to the TV any time a cartoon was having its "transformation episode", where the main characters get turned into something and have to deal with it. I was daydreaming about getting my hands on Mutagen from "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" and what I'd do if I was spending life in a form like that. I was reading through Dragonriders of Pern and hoping someone had a way to use that genetic engineering that created the dragons to turn me into one.

The trouble was, I couldn't always be able to tell WHAT species I'm "supposed" to be. I still can't, really. I end up changing every 5-10 years, it seems. There's aspects of several species, contradictory aspects, that seem to "fit" better at different times. Currently, I flip between a few forms on a regular basis, the three I write my stories about. Princess the non-anthro dragoness, Flopsy the Hoofbun, and Vayryn the Yinglet. (While those are the names of the main characters, when it comes to me, they're more like nicknames/pet names. I'm always Typhin, my personality is always me, but the forms tend to highlight different aspects of them, in addition to the physical sensations that they would have.)

At the time, though, I didn't have words for what I wanted. I didn't have "anthro" or "furry" in my vocabulary. I remember around the age of 11, I was seeing a therapist (because the school demanded I be allowed to see one before being allowed to attend 6th grade, because THAT'S such a GREAT thing to boost a kid's self-esteem!) I remember trying to get across the idea of "I want to be a rabbit, I want paws and long ears and fur." And she had no idea what I was talking about, and thought I was looking for a way to not have to do chores. "Oh, you want paws so they can't make you do the dishes." "No, I still want, I dunno, paws that can do things? But they're paws."

"Otherkin", though... That's a loaded term. When I was first finding online communities, when I was first finding out who I was and that I was not alone? I still didn't know what a good "term" for me was. I still don't, really. Back in the early 2000s, "Otherkin" was "People who think they have the reincarnated soul of a faerie/other thing", and, well, I don't really feel like I can confidently profess a belief in "souls". "Therians" were the were-creatures, exceedingly pretentious and loved nothing more than to rehash the same few "philosophical" discussions about why they're the real deal and everyone else is just posing. "You never see ugly species, that's how you know they're just picking things like tigers and wolves and stuff because they're cool instead of because they have a real spiritual connection to their animal. Not like US, we're tigers and wolves and stuff because that's really who we are!" They sneered at the concept of Otherkin, because "They're claiming they're something that's not even real!" (Conspicuously silent on the dragon-wolf who helps run their IRC server.) Just about the only group they were more vocal about in their hatred, however, were "furries".

Now, I had been part of this community of therians for a while, mostly by random chance. But I had not felt comfortable with claiming spiritual beliefs of any kind, of supernatural connections, of any kind of soul. I was still getting a grip on being transgender, I was just breaking through my denial (brought on by the pressure to "be normal" during teenage years, and especially "don't be gay") about that at the time. So I wore the label "Furry" proudly.

(Interlude: At the time, I was a fox. I had recently switched because before, I'd been an anthro dragon, but when I was joining a graphical chat thing and picking my species, I thought "Well, everyone's gonna be a dragon. I'm gonna pick something unique, something nobody else is gonna be: a FOX." I was naive and new to the furry fandom. But fox stuck a lot more than dragon did, possibly because it was smaller, cuter, the graphical chat's version was on all fours, and didn't have the "power fantasy" aspect of a dragon that never fit with me.)

There wasn't any requirement to "Furry", nothing about it made me feel leery about adopting it. So the therians I was with would be "accepting", saying things like "You're one of the good ones." But they'd still get riled up and start bashing on furries every few days. "They're all just sex-obsessed perverts!" With sometimes a hasty "Oh, but not YOU, Typhin" thrown in, but usually not until after my attempts to remind them about how that's an unfair generalization fell on deaf ears, and I ended up leaving the room in protest.

Ah, but there's another side to this story... Now, I'm told the term "Therian" has loosened a lot in the last 20 years. Maybe it has, maybe it hasn't, I don't know. I haven't looked into it. But at the time, or at least in the group I was with, there were a few "key parts" of being a Therian. Specifically, there was Shifting. Can't really be a were-creature without shifting, right? Now, clearly, none of them were going to try to claim they literally, physically transformed into a non-human creature and went for a romp in the woods. But they would have "Phantom Shifts" (or "P-Shifts"), in which they would feel the phantom sensations of tails or paws or other stuff. And in these talks, I would nod along, because finally, THIS was something I understood! I wouldn't claim I "had a soul bonded to a fox due to being one in a past life/had a soul meant for a fox body that got put into a human one by mistake/some other similar reason for my feelings", so I still wasn't calling myself a "Therian" like them.

But the day came when I finally tried to join in on that conversation, and boy was that a mistake. Someone was talking about feeling their phantom tail, and I commented, "Yeah, I know what you mean, it's weird when you don't." What I didn't know was that, for this group, "Phantom Shift" was a rare treat, something they felt for a few minutes once a month. And that they took this as a major sign of the depth of their bond. See, I feel a tail pretty much 90% of the time, and have as far back as I can remember. My brain is utterly convinced there's supposed to be a tail there, and will send signals to move it (which, in the absence of a tail, often get delivered to my right foot/leg) based on all sorts of things, including mood. Well, without tone of voice, I couldn't tell that the room had essentially gone so quiet that one could hear a metaphorical pin drop, so I cheerfully answered the "What do you mean?" question with talking about how I feel the tail more often than not, I can often "bring it into focus" at will, and how if I'm stressed and can't feel the tail for more than a couple days, I start to freak out because it feels like part of me is gone.

And let me tell you, that was precisely the wrong thing to say to them.

They exploded in anger, accused me of mocking and belittling their beliefs, accused me of lying, accused me of, well, everything they could think of. And all those "Oh, we don't mean YOU'RE like that" reassurances were shown to be total lies, as they started accusing me of being "just like the rest of the furries" and saying how much they've always hated me.

...

So, as for labels, I have no idea. I'm "me", that's the best I can really know for sure. I'm a girl but I'm not "girly". I joke that "I'm female in the way a cat is female: it doesn't matter outside of the actual act of sex." In truth, well, I am a pet. It's who I am. Princess is the embodiment of the "pet" side of myself, she's non-anthro, the size of a large dog, she wears a collar and has a cute name, and she's fiercely devoted to her Master/Owner. She loves him, he loves her. Flopsy is the embodiment of my hangup of "I have to be useful to be liked/tolerated/allowed to exist", she was created to be "Like a golem, but better" and was considered property most of her life. She, like me, only really feels like she can "earn" acceptance and love through acts of service. Vayryn, well, the story version of her had to have that "pet" aspect removed, because it would simply be cruel to let her have that when she can never really indulge it. But when I'm "leaning towards yinglet", I'm very much in my boyfriend's lap, cuddly and affectionate, and practically (if not actually) wearing a collar.

I don't really identify "as a person". I can "fulfill the role of a person in public", since I have to, but it's just a mask I wear. My ideal life would be living with my boyfriend, collar on 24/7, giving that unrestrained affection and deep love and pure devotion a pet has for their Owner.

But if some genie or something popped up and said, "Okay, but which body do you want?" ...I couldn't answer. I would be 100% happy to be a scaly blue dragoness on all fours, trotting along at Owner's side, thick tail wagging and a purr rumbling in my chest and internal fire burning hot. I can FEEL all of that in a way that feels more "real" than the body I'm in now. But I would also be 100% happy to be Flopsy the hoofbun, with or without her super strength, walking and running and jumping on a pair of clopping hooves, with thick and soft rabbit fur, and ears that perk up and twist and lay back and put my emotions on display, eager to do any task that might make Owner's life even slightly better, even though I wouldn't have that thick, heavy tail or the wings on my back. And I would be 100% happy to be Vayryn the yinglet, hand-feet plapping along as my entire upper body bobs as I walk, looking up and around at a huge world, tail bouncing with a thick poof at the end to twitch and flick, long stick-arms that can't even touch my own chest and force me to use my feet to work any buttons or similar, clambering up my boyfriend's body to be held in his arms and kept safe from a world of giants that will kick me with no hesitation. All of those are me. And more. I might not be 100% happy, but if said genie said "This is the form I can give you, take it or leave it", there's a lot of forms I would gladly accept.

As a teenager, I went with "anthro dragon", because I absolutely could not stand the idea of being a mountain-sized monster that people feared. As I started doing stuff online, as I mentioned, I went fox. Later, when I started playing Second Life, someone gifted me a skunk avatar that they were working on, one of the first available, and the way it "clicked" was intense. I spent the next ten years being a skunk. In late 2015, with a friend, I ended up trying out various parts and things, and the combination of horse hooves on a rabbit "clicked" in a way that skunk simply hadn't been, and I went hoofbun. During 2021, I found myself gravitating back to dragon, but this time cute and small and non-anthro, and Princess solidified. I hadn't been "ready" to "publicly change my base form", but I was spending almost all my time with my boyfriend as Princess, and (for the first time) developing a character/setting/backstory for her. I started writing in January of 2022 because I wanted to get things down solidly, untangle the jumbled mess that things were becoming when it was all being held in my head. And since I was actually posting chapters online, I went ahead and started switching profile pictures over and stuff. ...And then hoofbun came back, that aspect of myself being neglected caused me to develop a story/character/abilities and such for her as well. (She didn't have any strength or anything before that. I actually was plotting things out as a Metroidvania I wanted to make "some day", but I knew I would never actually be able to get a team I'd need for it, so I ended up recycling it into a second story series for writing. Some of her abilities translated to the new form, such as her strength and her Nowhere - It was going to be her inventory originally. Some got discarded, like the idea that she'd defeat a gryphon boss and gain a feather she'd use to craft a "double-jump" upgrade, the feather she has in her Nowhere in the story is something of an homage to the idea. Her entire plot also got scrapped and remade from scratch, where she's now trapped on Earth and is a cryptid/superhero trying to move past the idea of "being property" and learn to "be a person", worthy of love for who she is instead of for what she can do.) And only a couple months after that, life events really slammed home the feeling of "Small helpless creature, kicked around by uncaring/hateful giants" at the same time I was re-reading the "Out of Placers" archive, and the yinglet form was born. It gets back the "small and cute" aspect that was missing, even with Princess, and it lets me be "silly" in a way even Flopsy (with her less serious "superhero comic book" story) can't provide, and it also lets me feel like... "I can be held and protected and loved even if I can't do the amazing things Princess and Flopsy can do". For who I am instead of what I can do.

...

What am I?

Good question. If I figure it out, I'll let you know. For now, Princess is fine, Flopsy is fine, Vayryn is fine. I am "Typhin", I am "me". I am all those forms, and more. Lazuli the rubber Vaporeon, Sapphire the chocobo, Paws the skunk, Bessie the cow, forms I don't even have names for that all have their uses because they allow certain aspects to shine forth.

Maybe one single form really can't embody the whole of what I am.

But I know one thing: I am not human.

Sure, physically, biologically, whatever, I occupy a human body. I'm not deluded, I don't claim to have anything other than skin. I don't claim to physically have a tail. (But I know it's supposed to be there.)

I am me, and that's all I can be.

I'm a trans woman and I'm otherkin. Both labels describe parts of me, but neither describes all of me. Yet at the same time, they're both closely intertwined, both key parts of my discovery of who I am - and both more alike than one might expect.

I knew I wasn't supposed to be a guy. Even from a young age, I was drawn to feminine things. I wanted to be a girl - I just didn't have the words to say it, didn't understand why I felt the way I did. And as I grew older, that feeling crystalized. I tried to deny it, to pretend it didn't matter. Besides, it was never the conventional picture of dysphoria - I could manage being a guy. It was tolerable. That was enough, right?

But it wasn't what I wanted. I knew I'd be happier as a woman - I knew it with a certainty and clarity I could never put to words. I knew, and the moment I realized there was a path forward, a way to be who I knew I wanted to be, I took it. I transitioned. It cost me a lot - my home, my years spent in college, my friends and stability - and it was all worth it. Having that weight off my chest, getting to live as who I always wanted to be... it made everything else so much easier. It's like a good night's sleep - sure, you can manage without for a while, but it saps your strength, makes everything else so much harder.

But as I transitioned, as I embraced my life as a woman, I realized... I wasn't quite where I wanted to be. I was closer - so much closer - but I wasn't there yet. There were a lot of little things I wanted to change about myself... and one big one.

I wanted to be something other than human.

At first I denied it, pretended it didn't matter. I had done so many things I'd never thought possible - I'd transitioned, I had a good job and was living on my own. I had good friends and the freedom to steer my own life. Wasn't that enough?

And those words were familiar. The feeling was familiar. It didn't take me long to put two and two together. And when, one day, an impulse art commission gave me my first ever picture of myself as a sphinx...

...I knew. I knew that this feeling was the exact same one that drove me to transition. I knew denying it would work about as well as denying that I'm a woman. So I decided not to. I decided to accept who I am.

I'm a woman, and I'm a sphinx. I'm transgender, and I'm otherkin.

Otherkin. Somehow, it's an even more loaded word than transgender. It implies so much, and that made it harder to accept. I don't believe in other realities or reincarnation. I don't believe I was a sphinx in a past life or other world - I'm really not spiritual at all. So how can I call myself a sphinx if, objectively, I know I've got the body of a plain old human?

The same way I knew I was a woman.

I'm not ignorant of my biology. I know what's coded into my DNA and what my body is shaped like. But why should any of that have any say on who I am? I'm more than my body, more than the chance outcome of genetics and evolution. I get to decide who I am - and I choose to be a woman, and I choose to be a sphinx. Why? Because it makes me happy. Because it feels right. Because it's my life to live and I get to live it how I want, so long as that doesn't hurt anyone else. Sure, I can't transition to be a sphinx in real life (not with modern technology, anyway), but when has an inability to transition ever made anyone's identity any less valid? I'll do what I can to make my body more comfortable and live with the rest, because the alternative - pretending what I feel doesn't matter - isn't living.

I'm a transgender woman.

I'm an otherkin sphinx.

And I'm happy.

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

396 of 2023

Unpopular health and wellbeing opinions

Chiropractic is (for the most part) a load of bullspunk. Lemon water’s supposed benefits are completely placebo effect and based on bad science. Motivational authors/speakers are frauds scammers and salesman. Packaged foods can be healthy. Some forms of religious ritual can be very beneficial to mental and emotional health (others are utterly toxic). Noise (especially vehicle noise) should get way more recognition and priority as a public health issue. To feel well is nearly impossible when your brain is very loud and destroy everything also the rare "good" moments. Way too much health and wellness media is literally fucking up people's wellness by fear-mongering about certain foods being horrible for you. It's fun to laugh at alternative medicine, but it's also important to recognise that a lot of people turn to it because the medical system has failed them. A person's weight is a poor measurement of their health. Public spaces should have areas that are friendlier to people with sensory issues. Sometimes an action or product that's physically not very healthy is still worth using if it has psychological and emotional benefits. Moral prohibitions against partial nudity are bad in general. Intentionally only sleeping 4-5 hours a night (as in for bragging rights, not because you don't really have a choice due to responsibilities, insomnia, etc.) isn't impressive, it's dangerous to others. Every dollar spent on seeing a naturopath would probably do you more good if you flushed it down the toilet. Citalopram is (edit: usually) just the 'we don't know what the fuck to do with you anymore' pill. Most of the evidence against diet soft drinks is flimsy. Everyone should be offered the option to communicate with their therapist via email/text/writing, partially because of anxiety but mostly because things can easily get twisted to make a person look 'unstable/incompetent' unless it's in writing When it comes to health and wellbeing misinformation google is probably a bigger offender than facebook. Being self-critical and thinking about all your own mistakes is a disease in itself that I will never be able to defeat. It's very bad to self criticise based on the expectations of people who don't know you and don't know your life. You're not obligated to do things you can't do because other people think you should do those things. Your wellbeing matters more than appeasing other people's ignorance, especially when their ignorance dehumanises you and serves power and privilege against you. The glycaemic index is a little overrated (unless you're diabetic). It is important to skip breakfast and give your metabolism an extra few hours of rest. Eating fruits is not as good for you as people think it is. Overeating is way too normalised in our society. Obesity has little to do with genetics. It is mostly a lifestyle problem with too much highly palatable ultra-processed food and no portion control. Starvation mode isn’t real and is used as buzzword. Therapy is not as useful for everyone as most people think, especially if you are already self aware about your problems and where they stem from. People like to tell people to just go to therapy when they have problems and ignore that its not accessible to everyone and that having access to therapy is a privilege. Healthy at every size is a logical fallacy. Therapists can be dangerous because they can make people believe things about themselves or their patients which are not necessarily true. Stereotypes are harmful and you shouldn't assume things about other people's health. Examples are assuming all east asians are naturally skinny or all quiet people are depressed. Just because someone is fat or even obese does not mean they have an ed. Doctors should find out what the cause of the problem is before prescribing medication. Children should not have to change in order to not be bullied. As of recently, having ADHD has become a 'quirky' personality trait for many and it's what makes people who actually experience these issues silent sufferers. Mental illnesses are not a trend.