#i go wild for analysis thank you

[destiel-wings]

watching Angel (the series), I feel like is really interesting, specifically in s3 cause I think in some ways it was good but they did Cordelia SO dirty. I feel like there were some aspects where I was like yeah that was totally written by a man e.g. when Angel gives her a necklace after being away cause of Buffy’s death and she’s like it brings out my boobs 🙄.

I feel like there are some scenes that are kinda ironic considering how Joss treated Charisma like when Cordelia was doing that commercial? Like was that a dig at Joss? But also that’s 90s early 2000s writing as well.

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

I don't know if you're watching the show for the first time or not, so I won't give you direct spoilers, but what they did to Cordelia gets so much worse in season 4.

There is one storyline specifically that happens that season that we as a fandom collectively pretend never happened.

And I actually like season 4 (i love the way that it's built, the plot twists, the epic tones of the main villain coming, the way that some characters develop and the main theme/metaphor that relates to the big bad of the season), but what they did to Cordelia will always be one of the greatest faults of the show. And now that all the rumors about Joss are out, we know why that happened too. 😔 That's when Charisma was pregnant and Joss threatened to fire her. And he did.

I mean, I can see the casual misogyny you're mentioning in the first three seasons as partly being due to the 90s/early 2000s writing (definitely a factor), and partly as a sad realistic depiction of what real actresses in the business like Cordelia (or generally women everywhere) had to endure at the time, when they couldn't even speak up. And i think there's a distinction to be made here, because there's two types of misogyny (or any other problematic behavior) that can be shown in media.

The scene where Cordelia is posing in a bikini and the photographer is a complete jerk for example is a harsh depiction of what society used to be (and still is), and so, in my opinion deserves to be in the show, because stuff like that is a slap in the face that should outrage us. Shows nowadays are excessively tiptoeing around real life issues. And i don't think it's helping anyone. I think we should be able to see stuff like that in fiction so we can say "this is horrible. It shouldn't happen in real life," and hopefully we can learn from it and get better as a society. In this sense, it's useful misogyny, because it exists to outrage the viewer and sensitize them to the issue. And there's tons of other examples of this in the show (I'm thinking about Lilah's storyline for example).

And then there's the pointless misogyny. Lines like "it brings out my boobs!" or other examples that i can't think of right now that won't really teach you anything if not make you cringe thinking "a woman would never say something like that", or "this is a disservice to the character for no valid reason" (like what they did to Cordy in season 4). That type of misogyny outrages us, but for different reasons, because it's gratuitous and completely unnecessary, and should be rightfully cut out.

Unfortunately the show does both. It is the product of its time, and that needs to be taken into consideration. In the end, I think the good it did outweighs the bad, and it managed to tell stories that are still strong and powerful today because it never shied away from speaking about human weakness and visceral struggles in a way that's raw. And people can relate to that (generally speaking).

And you're right, it is ironic, Joss became a feminist icon for creating Buffy, a show where strong (and yet human, flawed, imperfect) characters always stole the scene (with a few male characters exceptions)-- and then he created Angel. A different show, more adult, darker, with some noir touches, and a male lead. And I think, the vibe being so different and more focused on a male lead like Angel (who represents an anti-hero version of the knight in shining armor, which is, per se, an anti-feminist trope) the slope was slippery and so some misogyny slipped through. I'm not saying that misogyny was inherent to the basis of this show but... it kinda was. One could even say that Angel is the anti-Buffy (literally, one show being about a frisky young female lead who is a hero pledged to rid the world from evil vampires, and the other one being about a brooding 200+ year old male lead that is a former(?) evil vampire always ready to save a damsel in distress). The cool thing though, is the show itself is aware of that, and brings it out at text level (for example with Spike mocking Angel for it, in one of the very first episodes of season 1). So what I'm saying is... it's complicated. It's a show that uses its female characters to cater to its male characters' arcs sometimes. But it's also a show that gives us great female characters. Strong, powerful, intelligent, human, unapologetic. There's the good and the bad.

Back to Joss Whedon, personally, I can see him putting a lot of his own personal struggles into the show. Like, the theme of Angel season 5 is literally about the heroes trying not to get corrupted by the power, and that's kind of what Joss did. Guess he wasn't as good and righteous as most of his characters in the end.

[magpiesbones]

Oh so about that previous ask, (sorry it sounds so clipped I should have provided more context) it's about Mal's behaviour in siege and storm which...a lot of people take an issue with apparently? I think the part where you said they're fictional and used to explore themes of war & innocence makes a lot more sense (I think of the three love interests, Mal is similar to Peeta from Hunger Games in the sense that he represents innocence but not in the same way Peeta does- though that's a diff conversation)

It comes as a surprise to *me* because I read Mal being jealous of Nikolai, forgetting to keep watch for Alina as a guard after their fight and in general hostility as signs of him chafing under the weight of what was being asked of him (staying in the palace amongst the Grisha to the detriment of his own treatment, forced to give up his tracker duties to be a guard, et cetera, all this after nearly dying at the hands of the Darkling and seeing his own two friends killed) and in general him and Alina had a long, long way to go in terms of healthy communication (Alina not telling him about visions of the Darkling though tbh I wouldn't know how to approach such a thing either).

Also I don't. Think. Him kissing Zoya (she did kiss him first to which he only kissed back) was all that...serious? At that point he believed Alina no longer cared about him so I fail to see how it's a sign that he hated that Alina was more powerful than him and how that makes him one of those abusive men who hate to see women succeed more than them or some of the other frankly insane takes I've seen. Its not really cheating either 😭 Plus I don't think a lot of people take it with a grain of salt of and consider that Alina is a semi (or very) unreliable narrator and we need to read between the lines

IDK like was he flawed? Yeah. Was he annoying at times? Yeah. Does he need more substance outside of being in love with Alina and being a tracker? True. But the people who say he's toxic/sexist/abusive/bigoted have me very very baffled, even going as far as to say Malina is just as bad as Darklina, and it's making me question my own analysis because am I just naive and young and don't know an awful person when I see it?

look. I read this series once and not recently. I also didn’t pay any attention to the romance. This is the Alina’s Martyrdom Issues trilogy to me. In light of this, I paid attention to the boys only as much as they played into Alina’s issues.

How the fuck would leaving Alina (more powerful than Mal) for Zoya (Also more powerful than Mal, with the bonus of being willing to kick his ass) be indicative of misogyny. Mal is effectively Just There because he’s Alina’s friend. He’s the least impressive in literally all counts. He’s the emotional support.

hes. A fictional character experiencing an emotional arc, which is one of those things that comes with Conflict.

I find it makes me less Mad On The Internet to stay out of the darkl*na tag.

[i-love-zelda-16]

DISASTER DUOOOOOOOOOOOO

LESGOOOO

okay LU analysis time!!!

skjdfkgksdlfjgsdjfghjdk JOJO THIS MAN. THIS MAN. WHY IS HE SO AMAZING.

so firstly, Warriors asks if Twilight has trained Wild with a sword. he asks this because i think Wild has probably told him that Twilight was with him during his adventure. or he hasn’t told him and Wars just knows that Twilight and Wild are close, so it would be plausible that Twilight had trained him with a sword.

none of this matters though, because Wild responds with that only his training to be a knight trained him with a sword.

he then talks about the blade that Four made for him. Four is a smith, it makes sense why the blade is made well. he probably learned from Melari or someone. or his grandfather, right?

AND JOJO EVEN SNUCK IN THE BEST LIL JOKE

so Warriors asks where Wild thinks he’ll be in five years. totk. and Wild responds with “hopefully not dead, i’ll be surprised if i have all my limbs!”

wild buddy. i have some bad news for you…

yeah ummmmmmmmm poor wild ig

Wars then asks where he wants to be in 5 years and Wild has a small existential crisis.

also can i just say that i love this duooo they’re so underrated.

the enemy we see here is called a Spark. i’ve matched it to the one from the ART of the Link’s Awakening remake. not the actual game. interesting…. (the ones in the actual game are much more yellow than green.)

sparks are, again, a downfall timeline enemy, which basically confirms that we are in fact in the downfall timeline. again, like the moblin from the last update, these are from Link’s Awakening which was a dream. sooooo our boys are in a dream?? i think it’s possible but unlikely.

something i found interesting about their placement is that they’re on the ceiling. why would they be on the ceiling if the disaster duo isn’t going up there? i feel like maybee there could be an item that allows them to walk on walls or gravity flip or something like that. the pathblades and water on the floor support this idea. although, if this was technically a 2D dungeon, that idea wouldn’t really work… hmm… interesting thought tho

pathblade. Wild almost gets his toes cut off. pretty typical i’d say. i’ve matched the pathblade to the one from A Link Between Worlds. not a perfect match, but it’ll do. it’s also kinda similar to the one from Phantom Hourglass, but based on what we already know about our boys’ surroundings, and that Phantom Hourglass is in the Adult Timeline, this doesn’t seem likely. so, albw it is.

and finally, Wild pulls out the sheikah slate. there’s two options for runes he could be considering using.

1. stasis to freeze the pathblade while they cross the water. there are multiple pathblades tho and Wild can use stasis on only 1 thing at a time so… idk

2. cryonis to make an ice bridge across the water. if this was the “intended solution” to the puzzle (like i feel like this is a thing that the devs would do to us in a loz game) then it would make A WHOLE LOT more sense why the sparks are on the ceiling; cryonis makes raised ice cubes so then while Wars and Wild cross, they’d have to dodge the sparks. hmm that makes sense lolll

we received a lot with this update!! very fun!! yet still, questions are being posed!! i’m excited to see what comes next; thank you JoJo!!

[izelthewashbear]

Life series theory / analysis

// SPOILERS for Wild Life finale!

Okay so I have a theory about the winners and their character development throught the series:

Is it just me, or is Joel the only winner who had a positive character development through the series?

Just so that we're on the same page: Character development refers to cultivating certain traits in individuals that help guide their behavior. That means positive character development cultivates positive traits in a person, and negative character development (yes it's a thing) cultivates the negative traits. I was thinking about the finale of Wild Life and all of the winners and honestly? Joel seems to be the only one with positive character development. Also, I'm only talking about the characters, not the content creators, just so that there are no weird insinuations.

Let's go over the winners first, shall we?

Grian - the creator of Life and the one establishing the rules - immediately goes on to break them with an unprovoked green-on-green kill on Scar. Not to mention the toxic codependent yaoi these two developed on the desert and still can't leave behind.

Scott - the guy who was seen as one of the most loyal, ended up winning while avenging all of his fallen allies - learning that even alliances are fleeting and he can't keep himself too tied to anyone. The moment the next game starts, he almost immediately bounces from his goverment assigned soulmate and isn't really keen on making things even between them. Even at the end, the decision to sacrifice himself for Pearl is his and his only.

Pearl - do I even have to say it? Being rejected by the one person who was supposed to have her back, she turned on everyone and seemed better for it. Her trauma was not her fault, and neither was the negative character development - but it did occur.

Martyn - I could write a whole essay on LimL!Martyn and one day I shall do that. The guy that lost his therapy dog for 24h and proceeded to make enemies all across server, gain one (1) ally and backstab him at the final moment. Like cmon.

Scar - the somewhat oblivious, but kindhearted social butterfly (U think I can call him that?) decided he's better on his own and withdrew from the others, slowly turning into the villain of the server. Every time he had allies, he ended up worse for it - but this one time, even he couldn't believe "How did the guy with no friends win?"

Cleo - okay this one is a bit murky, since Real life was so short (and some people even consider it non canon but I digress). I'd just say that it was so short, they didn't really have any time for character development - but if you saw something interesting, lemme know.

And then there's Joel. The guy who struggles with keeping alliances and the moment he turns red, he only sees red. But the one time he starts depending on his family, the one time when he tries to keep himself out of red for as long as possible and doesn't fully give in to the bloodlust after turning red - he wins.

Anyways thank you for coming to my TED talk, if you noticed anything interesting lemme know Also this is like not very serious, I haven't watched all winners POVs so sorry if I accidentally mixed something up

[artful-ang3l]

North East Basement 1 Analysis!!

Well I was wrong in my preditction last time! We got the Problematic Group! I can almost hear the Warriors fans playing their fanfare, more power to y'all!!

Update is here if you hadn't read it yet! North East Basement 1

My thoughts are under the cut!

I find it so incredibly funny that we see the difference between BotW and HW here. Wild taking out 3 Boarblins while Wars takes out at least 6.

Wild can fight a lot of enemies in his game but Warriors can take out hordes!

Boarblins are also from Link's Awakening and the Oracle Games so... another enemy from LA

I feel like Warriors is trying to push the talk about what happened with the Iron Knuckle very carefully, bringing up Twilight and Wild possibly training together. He knew that Wild was trained as a knight and the phrasing seems like he's leading Wild into a conversation here, which is a good strategy.

Wild being excited about his sword is sooo cute!! Look at that little goober!

Sidenote: I would love to know more about Four's "trade secret". But maybe that's just my bais towards Smithy. He has great craftsmanship and the boys all know that!

Was Warriors even paying attention when Wild said the dungeon was similar to shrines? My boy said "These are LIKE shrines."

Entrance pt. 2

I mean yeah, dungeons are kinda similar to shrines. Puzzles, enemies, and the like. But like Wild said, they were made to train the hero, not try to stop him.

Cue TotK Wild slapping his younger self for that comment. I did infact laugh when I read that.

Wild's pretty young and has a very different life than Warriors has. Once again, this shows how similar Wild and Hyrule are. Plus that is pretty dark humor, something someone who's been through a war and seen people be amputated might not appreciate. Especially since Wars is trying to be serious here.

What does Wild WANT to be? That's a very good question. Wild's had the Master Sword from a very young age, around 12 as he told Twilight.

Memories pt. 2

His father was a knight so he was expected to be one. He was Flora's appointed knight so he was expected to be in her shadow protecting her for the rest of their lives. What does HE want? He may not know based on his face.

Sparks! Yet another enemy from Legend's era but also Wind and Four. These ones are defeated the same way as the Anti-Fairy from earlier. Boomerangs or magic powder. Which I'm not sure if Warriors or Wild have. But electric monsters next to a big pool of water is probably not a good sign.

Blade traps! They seem to be similar in design to either the Oracle games or Ocarina of Time. I'm gonna say Oracles because of the Downfall theming of the whole dungeon though.

Also Wild! What did Legend say! Watch your toes! Thank you Warriors for saving my boy!

Cryonis time!! Although it is worth noting that when Time looked at the Shiekah Slate with the Mask of Truth in Masks pt. 2, it said that the Cryonis Rune was unavailable. I don't remember exactly which line says that but I did spend a good chunk of time translating all of it a while ago and it said it was unavailable. Is that because he wasn't near water at the time or because the rune isn't working at all? I guess we'll have to see!

But that is all for now!

Predictions for next update! Wild is either going to use Cryonis and Wars is gonna be impressed! Or Cyronis isn't going to work and they'll have to find another way. Either way, I'm excited to see what's next!

All art belongs to @/linkeduniverse !!

[ashipiko]

—NIKO CIMARRON

All information on Niko Cimarron ATM! Will most likely be updated ☆

—MORE UNDER CUT

BASIC INFORMATION:

Class: 2-A

Birthday: October 24

Height: 176cm

Dominant Hand: Right

From: Land of Pyroxene / Shaftlands

Club: Film Studies (visits on occasion, inactive member)

Favorite Subject: Magic Analysis

Best Subject: Animal Languages

Likes: Making a profit

Dislikes: Getting outsmarted

Favorite Food: Berries / Berry flavored things

Least Favorite Food: Anything too hot

Specialty: Balancing on the line of lie and truth

GALLERY:

VOICE CLAIM:

YUU’S INTERVIEW:

— Scarabia Dorms - Niko’s Room —

for easier reading, all yuu dialogue will be in italics and all niko dialogue will be in a normal black font instead of green.

There you are. Surprised you came to visit me, Carrots.

> You know what I’m here for, Niko.

> Why are you surprised?

No need to act like that. Interview, right? Or should I say an interrogation? If you wanted to hang out with me, you didn’t need to hide around the bush, you know…

It’s cute seeing you all dodgy, but still. ♡

> I think it matches your vibe.

> You’re one to talk.

Yeah, yeah. How many questions do we have planned for today? Don’t take too long, now. I’ve gotta start pumping out those treats for my profit.

…Oh. No need to worry about a pen and paper, I’ve got one for you.

> I didn’t expect for you to be so prepared.

> (…They’re cuter than expected.)

Something something about matching the vibes… They’re modeled after an old movie about cops and so, interrogating. Figured you’d like them. A carrot for Carrots. It’s cute.

It’s about time to start though, huh?

> Yeah.

> No more wasting time.

INTERVIEW: START!

1. Can we get some basic info about you from… you?

A second year Scarabia student who’s a fox beastman. I guess I’m what you’d call a charmer, thief of the heart, man of your dreams… I’ve heard it all. But the real name’s Niko. Niko Cimarron. My surname means “Wild”, so you could call me Mr. Wild if you like that too. Heh, actually, it’s a business thing, so I guess you’d only call me that if you bought my products… Say, Carrots, you feeling like you need a snack? I have some lefties if you’d like.

> No thanks.

> Why not?

They’re tasty, I prommie~.

2. Speaking of which, what are your “pawpsicles” made from? How do you make them?

Those little things? Why, I’ll let you know I put my blood, sweat, and tears in those treats. Makes me happy to see other people happy, like the faces on a thaumark. To make ‘em, it’s just some tasty berries from the school grounds that get mushed up to get juice, where they go into a mold and freeze up. It’s hard work! I’ve gotta walk so many steps around the school and all across campus… You’re lucky you never saw me in my first year. Took me a while to get used to the schedule… Though, I’m a well-organized man now, I’ll have you know. It’s good for the public image.

3. You’re from the Shaftlands, aren’t you? Do you have any connections to Vil, Cater, or Jack?

Connections? I have them with everyone, really… though I don’t think those three are really aware I came from the same place as them. To be fair, the Shaftlands is a pretty big area. People even go as far to call it a utopia.

If anything, I’ve talked to Diamond more at NRC than anywhere in the Shaftlands. Is that because I never even saw him once? Maybe. So I can’t say about back then, but I can enjoy a good conversation with him now. He’s a good customer and a good influencer. Back then, he got me a good chunk of costumers off of a Magicam post, so I’ve got to give it to him. Who knew people could just follow trendy things at the drop of a hat? Crazy, right?

Vil is a major celebrity, and Jack, I didn’t even know existed ‘till this year. I’ve got nothing to say about Mr. Hardhead, but I’ve had my fair share of talks with Vil. When we were kids, I got a wave from him once… It was great bragging rights. Heh, he kinda freaks me out now though. The reason why I don’t actually participate in club activities. He’s probably too high of a standard for a lowlife like me, so it’s not something that bothers me anyway.

4. You don’t seem to have a Unique Magic. Any reason why?

Ah. Magic? A little bit of a sour topic for me, Carrots, ow… I’m just a late bloomer, is all. I’ve got magic in me, but I never played around with it when I was younger, so I’m way more rusty than all of the other guys here. It doesn’t mean I don’t know the brain stuff, though. Just inexperienced.

If I’m being dead honest, it’s kind of a miracle how I got into NRC. I guess they wanted the fox vote, huh? Heh.

5. Not sure if I’ve seen you around a lot with one particular person. Is there a secret someone?

Secret someone? Getting jealous, are you? Haha, I would’ve never taken you to be the type!

> Not the focus of the question.

> That’s not…!

It’s your fault for wording it like that. You’ve got to watch your words, Carrots. Well, the business life is a cold one, isn’t it? Being around a bunch of highschool guys isn’t really the “ideal” grounds for making business partners either, so it is what it is. At least this way, I get all the profits, so I don’t mind. If you want, I can save a spot for you by my side. ♡

> Again, no thanks.

> Maybe after I get a break from all the things this school brings.

Keep me in mind~.

6. Our last question. You say a lot of random stuff. People get annoyed with it pretty often. How do you feel about that?

…? Oh, you picked up on it, huh? Heh, I mean… I guess I could come clean. I think it’s interesting you haven’t walked away from me yet, y’know. Usually people aren’t into this stuff.

> You are annoying, but…

> (Would it be mean to say something?)

I appreciate you, Carrots. A little too much than I’d like.

Usually people don’t really like the stereotypical foxiness I bring to the table. They run away because I’m either something they don’t wanna get mixed up with, or just something they don’t like. I think you’re a weirdo who’s looking for entertainment when you come into my room and talk to me like this.

…But I guess that just means that you like the way I talk to you, right? You can’t get enough? Is that what’s happening here? ♡

> For a second, I thought you were going to need some comfort, but I guess not.

> Really, it’s fine, Niko…

Don’t pretend like your cheeks aren’t a little red. I like the reactions I get out of you. ♡

Is that all you wanted? Yeah? Alright, we’re done here, then. Hand me the pen, would ya?

> It was nice being able to talk to you like this.

> (That was a quick turnaround.)

…Yeah. Hurry on up, shouldn’t you be studying up on actual things worth studying? Live up to that Smarty McSmart Pants title. Bye-bye now~.

INTERVIEW: END!

> (I feel like Niko’s more than meets the eye.)

> (I feel like Niko’s… hiding something.)

.

.

.

TRIVIA:

Niko is twisted off of Nick Wilde from Zootopia!

Niko is actually magicless. Not entirely, as he does have some running in his blood, so he didn’t lie, but it’s not enough where he can successfully conjure spells. Because of this, at NRC, he often has to get by with con-artist type excuses and acts. It works most of the time, as he has Crowley’s support. For now, he’s getting by with the excuse of being a late bloomer, but I’m sure suspicions are beginning to rise… Perhaps, if it were to be found out that he’s unable to conjure spells, he would be kicked out of NRC.

He made it to NRC after being dared to attempt to con his way in by his magicless best friend. His name is not noted, but he’s a very angry and violent French fennec fox. Niko is often bullied by him.

He can be considered a fan of Vil.

Niko enjoys the pop genre a lot, but is embarrassed to admit it.

Despite being a playboy, Niko is easily flustered at the thought of someone seriously making moves on him.

Niko can also count as a bit of a heartbreaker. For the romantics around the school, everyone knows Niko as that kid who’ll charm you for a week and leave you heartbroken when he inevitability rejects you. It’s not anything against anybody, really, but more so the fact that Niko can’t ever imagine dating someone before he tells them his secret. It feels unfair to him. But people take offense to it nonetheless, the heartbroken people usually cutting Niko off as soon as they figure out that there won’t be anything working between them.

Because of the way some people leave him as soon as they sense no romance, Niko finds the concept of love to be sort of flaky. It takes a while for him to develop a crush, despite his flighty, flirty attitude.

Due to being a class 2-A student, Niko often ends up selling his treats most often there. Kalim and Silver are his number one customers, as Kalim buys bundles of them to give to Scarabia members, and Silver buys them for Lilia to enjoy.

Niko attends the Playful Land event and ends up staying in contact with Fellow Honest afterwards. This relationship ends up contributing a lot to Niko’s development.

Even though he doesn’t want to, he feels obligated to play into the deceitful foxiness of himself, because that’s what people naturally expect of him. It stops them from getting curious about him, as it seems like they’ve already got him figured out.

He says things that are considered shallow, like flirting or bargaining because he wants to get a reaction out of people. Niko does small things like this for small reactions — enough of these small reactions will fulfill the same satisfaction of seeing someone he loves flustered or happy, he thinks. In truth, he knows it won’t amount to much. Niko tries to satisfy himself enough so that he won’t need the real thing.

Niko feels very guilty for deceiving everyone at NRC, especially the prefect. Even still, he doesn’t have the heart to tell them that he truly doesn’t belong here, taking up a spot possibly for somebody who deserves it much more.

Niko’s way of thinking suggests that if he acts distasteful enough, it will cause people to stray far away from him. He believes that he really is just a lowlife fox, but the truth of his actions is something he think people would hate him for most; living in a lie. Because of this, he acts like a playboy and an annoyance in attempts to get people to stay away, preventing them from finding out the even uglier truth of him.

Additionally, he’s afraid to have the truth leak out because he doesn’t want to leave NRC. Though he doesn’t have much, he doesn’t want to lose the little bit he does have, and the little bits he keeps on gaining.

Even still, Niko craves for someone who will take time to understand him. Which is why he’s so attached to the prefect.

More to be added!

^ the pawpsicle icons in this relationship chart represent whether if the character is an avid pawpsicle enjoyer (has the icon), has experienced it once but never had it again (once!), and if they have never had it.

[writingfics-passingtime]

hi, can you please write about the reader overthinking decorating a pumpkin and loki threatens to tickle them if they don't start it 🤗🤗

I can still post pumpkin content cause it's still November, right?

Here's a sassy, stoic reader, an absolute teasing menace Loki, and a tender, emotional ending (because I can't help myself).

Exactly Like That

word count: ~4300

pairing: Loki x female reader

content / warnings: sexual tension, suggestive banter, flirting and touching, tickling, swearing

minors dni: this work does not contain smut, but does contain a suggestive relationship between the reader and an adult-aged character. I am not comfortable with engagement from anyone under the age of 18. Thank you for your understanding and respect.

note: thank you anon ~ I wasn't going to respond yet because my prompts aren't open, but I've seen a few other writers receive and fulfil this ask, and I've liked seeing what other have done with it. My imagination went a little wild. Thanks for your message x

The room was alive with voices, clinking bottles, and the occasional scrape of a knife against pumpkin flesh. The compound’s main dining hall had been transformed into an unlikely tableau of domesticity. Avengers, gods, and spies bent over their assigned gourds with varying levels of skill and enthusiasm. Stark’s pumpkin already looked like a disaster of glitter and questionable wiring, while Natasha’s had been carved into a clean, menacing grin, a masterpiece of precision.

And then there was you.

Your pumpkin sat pristine and untouched in front of you, its smooth surface mocking your indecision. Brushes, carving tools, and paints were scattered around your space, all conspicuously unused. You held a small knife in your hand, twirling it absently as you stared at the blank canvas.

“Do mortals often find themselves defeated by vegetables, or is this particular weakness unique to you?”

Loki's voice slid over you like velvet, dark and rich, tinged with mockery.

You didn’t look up. “It’s a fruit, actually.”

“Ah,” he drawled, moving closer. “Semantics. How very like you.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw him lean against the edge of the table, his long, lean frame clothed in casual, dark fabrics that clung just enough to remind you that he wasn’t of your world. His sharp blue eyes sparkled with amusement as he surveyed your untouched pumpkin.

“You’ve been staring at it for nearly an hour,” he said, his voice low and teasing. “Surely even you can’t find this much to overthink.”

You exhaled sharply, finally meeting his gaze. “Maybe I’m waiting for inspiration.”

“Or perhaps you’re simply afraid to begin.” His lips curved into a slow, knowing smirk, the kind that made your pulse stumble. “One wrong cut, one poorly chosen stroke, and the whole thing could be ruined. What a tragic metaphor for your careful, overthought life.”

“Thanks for the analysis, Freud,” you said dryly, turning your attention back to the pumpkin. “Now, if you’re done, I have work to do.”

“Work?” His laugh was quiet, mocking. He moved closer, the faint rustle of his clothing brushing against your senses like a whisper. “Sitting frozen with indecision isn’t work, darling. It’s fear.”

You bristled but kept your voice calm. “If you’re so invested in this pumpkin, why don’t you decorate it yourself?”

“Because I find your quandary far more entertaining.”

He stepped around behind you then, his tall frame casting a shadow over your seat. His presence loomed, a magnetic pull you both resented and couldn’t entirely resist.

“I’ll give you a choice,” he said softly, his voice close now, the faintest trace of his breath against your ear. “Either you begin decorating this ridiculous fruit, or I’ll take matters into my own hands.”

You turned slightly, meeting his eyes over your shoulder. They gleamed with dark amusement, his smirk widening as he caught the way your lips parted involuntarily. “Oh? And how exactly would you do that?”

Loki’s smirk deepened, his gaze dropping briefly to your lips before returning to your eyes. “I could start with this.”

Before you could react, his fingers brushed against your sides, featherlight but enough to send a jolt through you. You stiffened, gripping the edge of the table as his touch lingered, just shy of maddening.

You twisted in your chair to glare at him. “That’s your plan? Tickle me into submission? How original.”

His chuckle was low, dark, a sound that sent a shiver up your spine. “Oh, I think it would be quite effective. And besides,” he murmured, leaning closer, “I suspect you’d secretly enjoy it.”

Your breath caught at the sheer audacity of him, the way his voice dipped into something so sultry, so intimate, that your stomach twisted. “Sounds like you're desperate for an excuse to touch me,” you shot back, your tone sharp despite the heat rising in your cheeks.

He tilted his head, his smirk softening into something more dangerous, more deliberate. “Desperate? No, darling. Just curious.”

His gaze swept over you, slow and deliberate, as if he could see straight through you to the rapid beat of your heart.

The air between you seemed to thicken, the tension coiling taut as his words hung there, daring you to respond.

Your grip on the table tightened as you forced yourself to meet his eyes, even as heat coiled low in your stomach.

It felt like gripping the steering wheel of a car spinning out, but you snapped the moment.

“You’re not as intimidating as you think you are."

Loki laughed, soft and wicked. “Of course not. And you're the picture of composure, as always."

His hand brushed against yours then, the faintest graze of his fingertips, and you swore the room tilted.

“Go on,” he urged, his voice a low murmur, his eyes locked on yours. “Prove me wrong. Pick up the brush. Start decorating. Show me you're not afraid of a little fun.”

You hesitated, your heart pounding so loudly you were certain he could hear it. The weight of his gaze, the dark amusement in his smirk, the sheer magnetic pull of him it was... intoxicating.

Finally, with a sharp exhale, you grabbed the brush. “Fine,” you said, your voice tight as you dipped it into the paint.

Loki straightened, his smirk triumphant but his eyes still glinting with wicked intent. “There’s a good girl,” he said softly, the words like a caress against your ear.

It left you burning long after he’d stepped away.

As you focused on the paint in front of you, doing your best to ignore the heat coursing through your veins, you felt the thrill of his words linger.

The brush hovered over the pumpkin, the orange, unsullied skin glaring up at you like a taunt. Loki had retreated to the far end of the room, his fingers tracing idle patterns on the edge of the table as he spoke with Thor. You knew it was only a matter of time before his attention flickered back to you, the heat of a flame too close for comfort.

You had no intention of giving him the satisfaction of seeing you squirm under his gaze any longer.

Sliding the brush down as quietly as possible, you rose from your seat. The soft scrape of your chair legs across the floor was muffled beneath the ambient chatter of the room, and Loki didn’t so much as glance your way. Your pulse quickened as you edged toward the door, heart hammering with every step.

He didn’t follow.

Once you’d slipped into the quiet of the hall, the tension in your chest eased, and you let out a breath you were very aware you'd been holding.

You made your way toward the compound’s library, the solitude of it a welcome balm. The others would still be occupied for at least another hour - enough time for you to lose yourself in the pages of your book and avoid whatever game Loki had been playing that almost made you crack.

The library greeted you with its familiar quiet, the scent of leather sofas and paper a comforting presence. You found your usual spot tucked away in a far corner, a large bay window cushioned with soft pillows overlooking the courtyard. Settling in with a contented sigh, you pulled your book from where you'd wedged it between the seat cushion and the wooden frame.

The story drew you in almost immediately, the tension of moments ago dissolving into the words on the page. The sunlight filtering through the window began softening into twilight, painting the room in hues of amber and shadow.

The quiet here was sacred, untouched by the chaos of the compound. As you turned the last few pages, your chest loosened, the illusion of safety creeping in.

Surely, he hadn’t followed you. Surely, Loki had other things to occupy himself-

Surely not.

“I expected better from you.”

The voice slithered into your ears, so low and sudden that your breath caught in your throat. With all your years of training, you managed to stay frozen. Futile, though. You knew he could see right through it.

You looked up, and there he stood, shadowed and immaculate, his silhouette framed by the dim glow of a single, golden lamp. His icy blue eyes glinted with cruel amusement, his lips curling into a smirk that made your stomach twist.

“How... predictable,” he continued, taking a slow, deliberate step forward. “You flee like a rabbit, thinking you can burrow away from the wolf.”

Your heart hammered against your ribs, but you forced yourself turn back your book. “I don’t recall fleeing,” you started, turning a page. “I walked out, actually. Perhaps you’ve forgotten the difference in your old age.”

He chuckled, the sound low and dangerous, like distant thunder rolling over jagged peaks. “Ah, there it is. That fire you wear like armour. Does it soothe you to pretend you’re unshakeable?”

You scoffed, even as your pulse betrayed you. “You’re awfully sure of yourself for someone whose only hobby seems to be tormenting me.”

“Torment?” he echoed, his voice silken as he closed more distance between you. “My dear, if I were tormenting you, you’d know it. Shall I demonstrate?”

You didn’t dignify that with a response, instead turning another page of your book. The words blurred before your eyes, but you kept your expression neutral. “If you think I’m going to feed your ego by reacting, you’re going to be sorely disappointed.”

"Why did you refuse to take part?" There was something unnervingly earnest in his voice that pulled at your heart. "Why did you leave?"

You looked up, wearing a mask of indifference and sarcasm. “I didn’t realise decorating pumpkins was a matter of state importance.”

The smirk tugging at his lips was slow and predatory, dark amusement glinting in his eyes. “Such sharp words, little rabbit. Always so quick with your tongue when your heart’s trying to claw its way out of your chest.”

Your pulse spiked, but you refused to let him see it. Instead, you tilted your head, letting a slow, sardonic smirk curve your lips. “You said you weren't desperate, Loki. But you seem to have taken to taunting me for sport."

The laugh that slipped from him was low and sinuous, curling like smoke through the still air. “Oh, I don’t need sport to occupy me. But you…” He leaned forward, the space between you vanishing in an instant. “You’re far too entertaining to resist. Especially when you’re trembling behind that mask of yours.”

“I’m not trembling.”

“No?” His voice was a purr now, his breath brushing your ear as he lowered himself just enough to meet you at eye level. “I suppose you weren’t squirming earlier, either. Like prey in my hands.”

Your cheeks flared with heat, but you kept your expression neutral. “You sound obsessed.”

“And you sound very ticklish.”

The way he said it - smooth, dark, laced with that damned smirk -sent a ripple of mortification through you. It was all the confirmation you needed of his intentions to follow through on his earlier threat.

It was inevitable.

So you leaned back, lifting your book as if to shield yourself from the weight of his gaze. If you were going down, you were going down swinging. Well, verbally, at least.

“You’re overplaying your hand.”

“Oh, am I?” He stood to his full height, towering over you now, his shadow eclipsing the faint light. “Because the ones who act so tough, so stoic, so unbothered... they’re always the most fun. It’s so very delicious to watch them fall apart.”

“Is that what you tell yourself at night?” You forced your tone into something light, dismissive, though your grip on the book tightened. “That you’ve got me figured out?”

His smirk deepened, his head tilting as he studied you like a puzzle he already knew how to solve. “I don’t need to tell myself anything. You do all the work for me.”

Your lips parted for a retort, but his eyes flickered down to the slight tremor in your fingers, the way your knees shifted restlessly against the cushions.

And you saw how his smile widened, satisfied and predatory, when he saw all the hallmarks of someone about to flee.

“Go ahead,” he murmured, voice dropping to a velvet whisper. “Run. It’ll be more fun for me.”

For a split second, you froze, torn between logic and instinct. Then you bolted, your book tumbling to the seat as you darted for the nearest gap.

But Loki was faster.

You didn't make it two full steps before he caught you with a preternatural ease, his ensnaring hands dragging you back against him in one smooth motion. His low chuckle brushed your ear as he manoeuvred you down onto the window seat, half-pinning you on your side with his arms wrapped firmly around your waist.

“Pitiful,” he drawled, his tone rich with mockery. “And here I thought you’d make it a challenge.”

You shoved at him, scowling. “Let me go, you overgrown-”

Whatever venom you’d prepared was shattered as his fingers pressed into your ribs, curling with precision against the fabric of your sweater. Laughter burst from you, loud and uncontrollable, and you immediately clamped your lips shut, mortified by the sound.

“Ah,” Loki purred, his grin widening. “There it is. That lovely sound you try so hard to keep from the world. Go on, darling. Let me hear it again.”

“Loki, wait- no!” you gasped, but his hands had already found the curve of your waist, his fingers pinching with precision that felt criminal.

“No?” he echoed, mockingly incredulous. “You were so calm a moment ago. What happened?”

He didn’t give you a chance to answer. His hands slipped beneath the hem of your sweater, squeezing tighter, his nails grazing the bare skin of your sides. You quaked at the contact, laughter spilling out uncontrollably as he found every sensitive spot with uncanny accuracy. Your hands clutched at his forearms, his chuckle hot and tempting against your neck as your head fell back in mirth.

“Tell me the truth,” he said, his voice low and commanding, the words a dark melody against your ear. “Why did you run?”

“I- I...” you wheezed, twisting in his hold, going nowhere. With a ferocious, defiant growl, you yelled, "I... walked!"

Loki paused, his lips curling in that knowing smirk, and then he tickled harder, digging in with precision. You crumpled back against him, laughing helplessly, unable to catch your breath. Every sound that left your mouth was a mix of laughter and helpless gasps, each one a surrender to him, to the unrelenting tickling.

“Let's try again,” Loki commanded, his voice low, his breath warm against your ear. “Tell me why you fled.”

You struggled to pull yourself together, trying to come up with another witty retort, but before you could speak, Loki found an especially sensitive spot, just under your ribs, and his fingers locked in with a brutal efficiency. You shrieked, squirming beneath him, but he held you there with the effortless force of a god, his smile widening against the shell of your ear.

You thrashed harder, your laughter raw and breaking, tears welling in your eyes. “I’ll- kill you-”

“You’ll what?” He laughed, low and dark, his fingers picking up speed again, pressing and kneading with wicked precision. Every stroke of his hands felt like it was designed to unravel you, to push you past your limits and then some.

The realisation hit like a blow: he could read you. Every shudder, every hitch in your breath, every twitch of your body. And worse, he was enjoying it, adjusting his touch with the kind of skill that only centuries of mischief could hone. His hands didn’t just tickle; they teased, tormented, mastered you.

"You- oh my g-" you gasped, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. "You absolute fucking-"

“Such language,” he chided, his tone a tease of disapproval. “And after I’ve been so gentle.”

His fingers danced lower, teasing the curve of your hips, and the laugh that escaped you was so deep, so raw, it left your chest aching. Loki stilled for half a heartbeat, his grin sharp as he took in the sound, before redoubling his efforts. He pressed his thumbs into the tender space just above your hipbones, his fingers curling to squeeze in a way that had you screaming, your body writhing in his iron grip.

“Okay! Okay!” you gasped, tears of mirth welling in your eyes.

“Speak, then,” he commanded in low and silken voice, his fingers unrelenting. “And don’t lie to me. You won’t like the consequences.”

“I—” You hesitated, your breath hitching, but he gave you no mercy. His nails dragged lightly over your ribs, and the sound that tore from you was half a laugh, half a desperate gasp.

“Speak."

“I didn’t want to embarrass myself!” you finally choked out, your body trembling beneath his. “I didn’t want to make something stupid and have everyone see how bad it is!”

Immediately, his hands stilled, and you gulped in a shuddering breath. He unwrapped his arms from around you and leaned back, his smirk softening into something almost... fond. You shoved at him weakly, as if not quite believing he was retreating.

“Well,” he said, standing and staring down at you, admiring his handiwork, “you’ve certainly made a spectacle of yourself now.”

You glared at him, flushed and breathless. “You... are insufferable.”

“And you,” he countered, his grin returning, “are utterly fascinating. Shall we?”

Before you could protest, he hooked his arms under your knees and around your back, sweeping you up effortlessly, carrying you toward the door. You squirmed in his grasp.

“What the hell are you doing now?”

“Delivering you back to the battlefield,” he said, his smirk a knife’s edge. “You’re not escaping that easily. You’ve still got a pumpkin to ruin, and I, for one, am thoroughly invested in the spectacle.”

You groaned, your head falling back in defeat. "I hate you."

The smirk in his voice was undeniable. "No, you don't."

The dining hall was no longer the lively scene it had been earlier.

Now, it was deserted, shadows stretching long and dark across the room, flickering with the faint light of a few dying candles. The scent of melted wax and pumpkin guts permeated in the air, and the silence was nearly oppressive.

Loki carried you inside, his grip firm but not unkind, and though you didn’t resist, you couldn’t help but feel a smouldering irritation at the way he seemed to enjoy this small victory. When he set you down, his hands lingered at your waist, steadying you, as though daring you to bolt again.

You stepped forward, stopping just shy of your untouched pumpkin. Its smooth, orange surface gleamed in the low light, mocking you. The tools remained where you’d left them, and the weight of your earlier frustration pressed at the edges of your mind.

“I... don’t know what to do with it,” you said finally, turning back to Loki. You hated how the admission sounded - small, almost defeated - but there was no taking it back now.

Loki’s sharp gaze softened imperceptibly. His lips twitched, but the smirk didn’t fully form. “Then I shall help you,” he said, his voice low and smooth, offering no room for argument.

Before you could respond, he sat in your chair with that infuriating ease, his presence commanding even in the simplest of movements. His eyes met yours, glittering with a mixture of challenge and amusement, and he reached out a hand, curling his fingers in a silent demand.

“What are you-” The words barely left your mouth before you realised he was beckoning you to sit on his lap. Heat flushed through you, unbidden, and you scoffed, trying to mask it. “You do realise chairs are meant for one person, don’t you?”

Yet, unwilling to have him see how he was sliding under your skin, you turned and settled yourself against him. His muscled chest brushed against your back, his legs firm and solid as your seat.

“And yet, here we are,” he murmured, his lips brushing your ear as he spoke. His hand settled at your waist - an anchor, not a cage. “Now, let’s see if we can salvage your poor, neglected pumpkin.”

You scoffed, grabbing the carving tool. “Fine. Show me your masterful technique, Your Highness.”

The title came out sharper than intended, but Loki only chuckled, low and indulgent. He leaned closer, his shadow engulfing yours, and reached around your shoulder to guide your hand. His fingers slid over yours, his grip firm but not harsh. “Relax,” he murmured. His voice sent a delicious shiver down your spine. “You grip it like a weapon. This is art, not war.”

You bit back a retort and let him guide you. His body was close enough that his every movement brushed against yours, his breath warm against your cheek. Together, you began to carve into the pumpkin, slow and deliberate. His free hand flexed against your waist, your free hand steadying the canvas.

As the shapes emerged, you realised they weren’t ordinary designs. They were runes.

Norse runes. Delicate, intricate, and entirely unreadable to you.

Loki worked with a confidence that bordered on arrogance, his hand steady as he traced the lines with your hand.

“What does it say?” you asked eventually, breaking the silence.

He didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he leaned closer, his breath warm against your neck as he murmured, “You’ll see. Keep holding it steady."

The tension between you grew with every passing second. His touch lingered long, his presence close. Every shift of his body beneath yours was impossible to ignore, every brush of his breath against your skin a reminder of just how thin the line between teasing and something real had become.

When the carving was done, you slipped off his lap, feeling the need for a the brief moment of distance for your sanity, and retrieved a candle from the sideboard.

But the room felt colder without him holding you.

You lit the wick and placed the candle inside the pumpkin, watching as the light filled the carved runes, casting jagged shadows across the table.

You turned back to Loki. His expression was unreadable, his gaze fixed on you as though he could see straight through to your very thoughts.

Carefully, you sat back down on his lap, unable to ignore the magnetic pull he seemed to have on you. This time, you sat side-on. His hands settled instinctively, one on your back, one on your knee, holding you steady. With his height, your faces were almost level, but you still had to look ever so slightly up.

“What does it say?” you asked again, your voice quieter now, as if speaking too loudly might shatter whatever fragile thing had formed between you.

“The name of a great warrior,” he said, his tone mockingly reverent. “Renowned for wit, skill, and unmatched beauty.”

You arched a brow, your lips twitching. “Let me guess. Your name?”

His grin widened, and the silence was answer enough for you.

You rolled your eyes, but a genuine smile tugged at your lips despite yourself. “You’re unbelievable.”

“Yet undeniably fascinating,” he countered, his voice a low purr. His gaze dropped to your lips, and his smirk faltered, replaced with something quieter, more tender. Relieved. "There it is." His words were almost a sigh.

You tilted your head, raising a brow in question.

“I was beginning to fear you didn’t know how to smile.”

The intimacy of his words rendered you speechless for several, long seconds. Your mind faltered, your fingers fidgeting in your lap.

“What? You don't remember what happened like... twenty minutes ago? I recall laughing to the point of tears, thanks to you.”

“That was different,” he said simply, his tone quieter, earnest.

The air between you thickened, heavy with unspoken things. His hand moved in slow, deliberate patterns against your back. “It must be exhausting,” he said after a moment, his voice gentle and laced with something that sounded dangerously close to sympathy. “Always bracing for the next crisis.”

His sudden sincerity caught you off-guard. You fidgeted with your hands, stained with pumpkin pulp, your gaze dropping to your lap. “It’s not like that,” you muttered, though the words felt hollow.

“Isn’t it?” His hand stilled on your back for a moment before continuing its slow, soothing movements. “You are allowed moments of meaningless joy. To partake in frivolity. It doesn’t make you weak.”

A bitter laugh escaped you, soft and humourless. “I take it you didn’t buy that I was embarrassed about the pumpkin?”

He tilted his head, his lips curving into a faint smirk. “Not for a second.”

You looked up, straight into him. "But you let me go."

His gaze fell to your lips, as if he were already missing your smile. Mourning it. Plotting a witty remark or flirtatious comment that might see its return.

He then looked back to your eyes, swallowing harder than usual, his voice now gentle. “I thought you were due for some mercy. You... seem to have very little for yourself.”

The words settled over you like a weight, heavy and undeniable.

And for a moment, you couldn’t breathe.

"It feels wrong," you admitted in little over a whisper. "To... do things like this when so many people-" The breath caught in your throat and you had to look back at your hands, sniffing to buy some time. "It's selfish. Carving pumpkins. Decorating. Laughing at stupid things. People are out there suffering, and I’m here playing holiday games. Safe.”

Loki was quiet for a long moment, his hand resuming its slow, deliberate movements along your back. It brought you far more comfort than you'd ever admit out loud. Not yet, at least.

When he finally spoke, his voice was soft, the usual sharp edges dulled. “You cannot bear the weight of your world every hour of every day. Even the strongest flame falters if it is not tended.”

The rawness of his words cut through your defences. You couldn’t meet his eyes, but your lips twitched as you tried to deflect. “You know,” you muttered, half-laughing as your head dipped, “getting tickled to death felt a lot less exposing than this conversation.”

His chest vibrated with a low chuckle, and when you glanced up, his smirk had returned, a glimmer of mischief in his eyes. “I’m happy to oblige,” he drawled, his fingers curling against you as if preparing to pounce.

You shot him a warning look, though you couldn’t quite keep the corner of your mouth from twitching. “You wouldn't.”

“Oh, wouldn't I?” he teased, his hands still hovering ominously close.

"No," you shook your head, that twitch turning into a smirk. "I sat with you of my own free will. Trusting you. You won't jeopardise that."

The playful glint in his gaze softened slightly as he settled back, studying you with a quiet intensity. "The little rabbit may just be a fox after all," he mused, ceding his advantage.

He studied you for a good, long while, you both sitting in a comfortable silence as he traced idle patterns against your back, his thumb brushing your knee.

Finally, you swallowed your nerves, and broke the silence. "Thank you. For your help.”

You looked back to the table, eyes roaming over what he'd carved with your hand;

The name of a great warrior. He'd said. Renowned for wit, skill, and unmatched beauty.

"Runes are... actually quite beautiful."

He hummed softly in agreement.

You turned your head slightly, eyes still on the sharp lines. "What would my name look like?"

Then, you looked up at his face, and your breath caught.

His eyes were alight, faintly glittering from the flickering candle inside the artwork. Something between a smile and something far more satisfied curled onto his lips as he nodded at the runes.

"Exactly like that."

[amyoffline]

It's done! The outline for—

—is below the cut. The goal of this project is to explore the following phenomena with as much context and nuance as I can manage, tracing our history over the past 15 years:

What about us, and what about Dan and Phil, drew in and continues to draw in a very specific audience. If they are a ranch metaphor, we are a pizza metaphor 🥗🍕🫶🏻

Why we were Like That™, by which I mean so parasocially invested in them that we became, at times, the most annoying people on the internet. Much of that reputation is undeserved, and the videos on the phandom to date have been strongly negative. So, uh, I guess I'm going to put my face on camera and (mostly) defend us.

Reblog, share in your Discord servers, reply, or send me messages/anon asks with feedback or resources if you have any! Especially if your experience being in this fandom community has been dramatically different from mine. There are TIT spoilers near the end of the outline, but I'm not tagging because certain individuals seem to be lurking over there. Thank you!

Chapters:

Full outline:

introduction

cold open

felt personally attacked by jonathan haidt's last press tour

showed up to the phrenaissance 11 months late

had an unexpectedly strong response to their new content, needed to find out why

what the hell are we doing here?

- phenomenology (academics are professionally insufferable) - research question 1: what drew the audience in? - research question 2: why were we Like That™?

what we're NOT doing here

- a strict content analysis or "wow we sucked" video - providing sources for things best left uncirculated, thank you

reflexivity (personal biases)

- american zillennial in public health - in the youtube audience by spring 2010 - lurking in the phandom on tumblr 2013-2015, back* since 2019 - fan behavior i did and did not engage in

(----): truly necessary background information, i swear

(pop) cultural trends, tech, and their intersection

- nerd/geek identity and the first online weirdos - broadcast tv & the music industry vs the internet - defining "emo" - blogging & vlogging - early internet comedy

broader social/economic trends

- so the U.S. economy collapsed in 2007 - a decade that sucked except for rom-coms and square enix games - the flip/slide phone + digital camera + mp3 player loadout

(05-8): early youtube and early phil

youtube: a great video uploader without a clear purpose

the content on the website

- crossposts, corporations, and creative/social outlets - omg guys it's amazing phil - contemporary youtube-to-legacy success: justin bieber

the audience of "early adopters"

contemporary social media sites and forums

(2009): origin story

a wild dan appears… in the comments

the global constant that is teenagers being messy online

daring my old school district to sue me

- "one town's war on gay teens" (literal rolling stone headline!) - epidemiology 101: rates of… ugh… "unaliving" oneself - ways kids cope when it seems no adults will help them

the earliest days of dan & phil

- hello internet + pinof - a chronically overexamined timeline - file deleted ---* so how big WAS the audience at the time? ---* acceptable funny/edgy language was just different

contemporary youtube-to-legacy success: lucas cruikshank

omg it's meeeeeee

- how amy & friends were using youtube - ways i was just destined to end up here - being in social environments with peers 3-6 years older

(2010): is it "twenty-ten" or "two thousand ten?"

youtube is a platform about to explode in popularity

- the algorithm before it was The Algorithm™, lost site features - let's take a trip through the wayback machine :3c - actual dan & phil content in 2010 - the green brothers found vidcon - contemporary youtube-to-legacy success: darren criss

social media: also about to explode in popularity

- facebook was cool at the time, believe it or not - law of equivalent exchange: 2010 amy cringe compilation - the birth of instagram and pinterest - youtube slash livejournal (the first phanfics… sort of) - shockfic and its place in the overton window

the beginning of "the great rewiring" as haidt calls it

- ways social media is about to dramatically change - third spaces become online spaces - confounding variable: changing expectations of teens

(2011): the end of an era, the start of an age

a very long tangent on fandom and pop culture

cultural exchange

counterculture and teenagers as concepts

the first british invasion: the 1960s

- beatlemania and its descendents - moral panic about the virtue of tween/teen girls - tv/film/fashion trends being imported from the uk - in parallel, star trek births the modern fandom

the second british invasion: the 1980s

- synth/new pop that came out of the punk movement (hi, emo?) - confined mainly to music and fashion - cool britannia

it's harry freakin' potter

- absolute titan of pop culture influence - the rise of online fandom: examining the horrors ---* what is "wank" ---* flaming, sockpuppeting, and general cyberbullying ---* censorship: ffnet purges, boldthrough, & strikethrough ---* other fandom shenanigans of the time (yaoi paddles, anyone?)

harry potter's over. now what?

- for those who needed coming-of-age hero's journeys ---* twilight and YA dystopia waiting in the wings ---* some pretty iconic tv shows start or hit their stride ---* the mcu's phase one ---* takeaway: the rise of "geek culture" generally - for those who just wanted to go to hogwarts ---* doctor who & the wider world of bbc programming ---* british vloggers, you say? where? on youtube? brb--

end tangent, back to your regularly scheduled programming

dan & phil in the first half of 2011

- a continuation of 2010… for now - the videos - british pancakes as a case study of bad fan behavior

streaming and social media

- the birth of snapchat, twitch, and younow - netflix starts developing original programming - multi-channel networks (mcns) - digitour

dan & phil in the second half of 2011

- and they were roommates (omg they were roommates) - fantastic foursome - youtube glitches out - the super amazing project - the first proper baking video + wait, is that the bbc?

~ baking interlude 1: christmas cookies ~

the family sugar cookie (sorry, delia)

amy's 2011

(2012): why is anyone nostalgic for this

the transition from desktop to mobile

- massive growth in smartphone ownership 2011-2015 - things one might do on mobile one might not do on desktop - non-online ways smartphones changed being a youth™

what is tumblr and why is my child using it

- how the site is meant to work - fandom, memes, aesthetics, and SOME public figures - want to be anxious and depressed in peace? come to tumblr - this site seems a little……… gay ---* tumblr's very queer, very neurodiverse userbase ---* legacy media representation in 2012: bad! ---* actual academic research on tumblr users (yes, it exists) - the tumblr experience for non-native english speakers

amy becomes a vibrating mass of panic and paranoia

- in context of the above - additional rant about the american public school system

the growing dan & phil audience

- investigating the origin of the term "phannie" - more collaborations = more viewers - more video uploads = more /invested/ viewers - younow and interacting with fans - watch time replaces clicks in the algorithm

online etiquette, or lack thereof

- mid-transition from the 2000s to the 2010s - "professional internet celebrity" is still basically brand-new - lack of boundaries - various ways to be an asshole online - unsupervised kids simply do not engage in best practices

the end of 2012

- dan and phil move to london - wikipedia vandalism - tiptoeing around a top contender for the phandom's greatest sin - super amazing project DONE, now it's BBC RADIO TIME

(2013): arguably the most important year

- wait. what's that six-second video platform over there--

[amy's curated vine compilation]

- a new wave of internet comedians (read: future youtubers) - the zillennial lexicon - other platforms start emphasizing short-form video content - magcon

emo is BACK - well, sort of

- fob hiatus ends, mcr breaks up. my god. you had to be there - more open ties to nerd/geek culture than in the 2000s - these things once again intersect at dan and phil

dan and phil in the first half of 2013

- siri, what's a "sex symbol?" why are you booing me i'm right-- - d&p are everywhere - radio shows, interviewing, hosting - youtube uploads on their individual channels

rapidly changing cultural attitudes towards queerness

- gay marriage will be legal in places other than canada soon - a lot of assimilationist rhetoric though tbh - parallels to the pop feminism of the decade

hey kids, let's talk about compulsory heterosexuality!!

- what is it and why do people do it - academic, tumblr-level, and anecdotal research - the dannies, the phillies, and the phannies

amy

- the closet™ - mental health stigma - 2013 dnp posts from my main blog

dan and phil in the second half of 2013

- subscriber milestones, vidcon - joint content before the gaming channel - phandom starts having a major presence outside tumblr

(2014): achievement unlocked!

it's time to talk about rpf

- definitions (a chance to be annoyingly pedantic) - academic perspectives and fan discourse on the ethics - when the subjects clearly aren't fine with it - so… we can acknowledge "shipping phan" was different, right? ---* sometimes the subjects are fine* with it, actually ---* how dan and phil started to handle the shipping ---* obvious differences between phan and other rpf ships ---* sharing my favorite passages as a first-time phanfic reader

dan and phil in 2014

- wikipedia vandalism 2: electric boogaloo - bbc request show → internet takeover - the 7 second challenge - youtube content, subscriber milestones, rewind - cons and award shows

tumblr reaches the peak of its influence

- yahoo's attempts to monetize the userbase - buzzfeed and aggregators steal our jokes and bait our clicks - legacy media dangles carrots and uses us for free marketing - the legend of korra breaks TV precedent, almost out of nowhere - the tumblr user experience ---* on mobile, without xkit ---* on desktop, with xkit ---* 2014 dnp posts from my main blog

gamergate and its long shadow

- trolling, renewed and revamped - algorithms push increasingly extreme content - the broad conservative backlash conglomerate - increased normalization of conspiracism in general

my greatest sin [not clickbait] [very funny]

- so, circling back to comphet… - the actual story

anyway, let's talk about danandphilgames

- a star is born: dil howlter - different types of gaming content on youtube at the time - why did 17yo amy not subscribe? well…

~ baking interlude 2: chocolate cupcakes ~

make your own frosting. it freezes well

roasting myself further

(2015): it's not queerbaiting when it's real people

facebook "pivots to video"

- mark zuckerberg lied. water is wet - causes other platforms to REALLY double down on video - the birth of musical.ly - corporate-branded creators (read: future youtubers)

queerbaiting enters mainstream public consciousness

- academic origins - early fannish and acafan writing - johnlock, destiel, and sterek - statistics 101: type i error, type ii error, and queerbait

dan, phil, and the phandom

- bbc, cons, & the brits - danandphilcrafts - phan conspiracies ---* japhan ---* body language experts ---* timeline truthers ---* floor plan investigators ---* no but seriously imagine it - regular youtube uploads ---* solo content ---* joint content ---* subscriber milestones, rewind - tatinof uk and tabinof ---* on "selling out" ---* revisiting the statistics 101 lesson: now with real people! ---* never meet your heroes (unless they're dan and phil)

amy's (temporary) exit from the phandom

- it's legal adulthood with a steel chair!! - growing discomfort with some fans' behavior - 2015 dnp posts from my main blog - the closer: final fantasy vii

(2016): season finale

vine's imminent demise

- content platforms behaving badly - content creators behaving badly

youtube after "the great rewiring" (as haidt calls it)

- version 1.0 of the modern youtube algorithm ---* deep neural networks for dummies ---* what's holding creators accountable, or not - advertising and sponsorships ---* basically every child and youth™ is watching now ---* the battle for our attention ---* regulators start to crack down on undisclosed ads - the rise of drama/tea content (and later, channels) ---* youtubers are now seen as regular celebrities ---* dan and phil as the butt of other youtubers' jokes ---* baiting the phandom for engagement

tatinof us and aus

- a proven new model for live show tours - show & documentary released to youtube red (now premium) - [sigh] the tour bus

sea change in online fandom

- the newer, sometimes queerer media in korra's wake ---* better and more representation in live-action tv shows ---* voltron (i'm sorry!!!) ---* the mystic messenger craze ---* alice oseman & heartstopper - the new dynamics of #discourse ---* proship is to anti as phannie is to phanti ---* the bad behaviors of the 00s get a new coat of paint ---* new, though: fans harassing creators ---* a personal note on ace discourse

dan and phil presence off-tour

- the internet takeover ends - regular content, subscriber milestones

so. uh. current events.

- brexit - sorry the united states is a font of chaos - ripple effects

closing out the year

- amy finally gets an anxiety diagnosis and treatment! hurray! - dapgo, rewind - bbc radio awards & the boncas - gamingmas

(2017): time for a rebrand

tangent - sit down!!! buckle up!!! today's lecture is on PSIs & PSRs!!!

"parasocial" as defined by the current zeitgeist

- summing up youtubers' and laypeople's opinions (not dan's) - an unfairly negative stance overall, imo

older academic literature

- the 1956 paper (yes, 1956) - with traditional celebrities - with fictional characters

current academic literature

- with youtubers and other content creators - positive effects on the audience - negative effects on the audience - broader societal implications

fandom spaces as a parasocial experience

- parasocial and truly social interactions with each other - phandom as a supportive, welcoming space for oddballs - what research i can find about neurospicy folks, + anecdotes - me and everyone else on planet earth move to discord

inherent transactionality

- the nature of celebrity - positive effects on creators - negative effects on creators

reexamining early phandom through a parasocial lens

- the good, the bad, and the ugly - the role audience demographics played in all of this - entering, exiting, and remaining in the phandom

end tangent, back to your regularly scheduled programming

vine is well and truly dead

- some had prepared to become primarily youtubers (smart) - some move to musical.ly, insta, facebook, or snap (less so)

the sun sets on danisnotonfire

- i am very normal about dan's hobbit hair, i swear. - the last dnp content before the rebrand - new apartment, new floor plan investigations

adpocalypse now

- youtube has become the village elder of platforms ---* increased scrutiny, increased responsibility ---* some youtubers had been getting away with !#$!#@% - the scandals ---* pewdiepie + logan paul ---* elsagate and being "family- friendly" (read: ad-friendly) - censorship and monetization ---* adsense revenue goes down as advertisers pull out ---* the glory days of posting whatever and making bank are over

amazingphil and ~daniel howell~

- youtube & younow content - that week in march - vacations and conventions - conjoined baking and the concept of a "soft launch" - daniel & depression → dan as a mental health advocate - truth bombs, ii announcement, rewind

(2018): the phandom vs the hiatus they told us not to worry about

interactive introverts

- "giving the people what they want" - in hindsight… - let's talk about dnp fans from the global south

youtuber burnout

- it wasn't just dan: (more examples than header fits) - the old model was simply not sustainable - newer contributing factors - research on burnout, plus personal anecdotal experience

other dan and phil content

- younow/rize lives - dan's last videos before… you know… - phil's solo content in 2018 (quiff!!) - pinof → wdapteo - the gaming channel

other stuff happening online and in the world

- youtube raises the barriers to monetization - many "pivot to video" creators are now independent - the modern youtuber's multiple streams of income - continuations of societal trends in 2016 - musical.ly becomes tiktok - notable: she-ra and the princesses of power

the hiatus™: part myth, part reality

- how long dan was actually offline - major confounder: tumblr implodes almost overnight - major confounder: perception of content density from '13-'16 - major confounder: rapidly maturing audience - major confounder: our temporal awareness is about to go way ↓↓

~ baking interlude 3: scotcheroos ~

minnesotans and their obsession with "bars"

amy has one last existential crisis (you know, to date)

(2019): demolishing the closet with a nail bat

phil videos in the first 5 months of this very important year

basically i'm gay

- my thoughts - its legacy in the canon of "coming out" stories - multiple things can be true at once

coming out to you

- my thoughts - its legacy in the canon of "coming out" stories - why phil waited (actual explanations, speculation)

amy's 2019

- return to the audience, not really to the phandom (rip tumblr) - strange coincidence that i also had a major life transition

dan and phil: still here, freshly queer

- twitter becomes the main nexus of phandom, by default - regular phil uploads + brief return to younow - vidcon

(2020): go home and stay there

so it's a goddamn global public health crisis

- infectious disease perspective - effects on overall well-being of adults - effects on kids and teenagers (sorry to all of you) - political and economic impacts

hitherto unforeseen levels of online content consumption

- tiktok replaces basically all short-form video content - yet another wave of new (otherwise unemployed) youtubers - you're watching a video essay. these got really popular now. - being young and isolated: thoughts from younger phannies

the Content™ bc that's the one word we use for this now

- phil's videos - when dan is around - that attitude magazine interview - pour one out for the phil solo project(s) the panini wrecked

further political disaster… avoided?

- checking in on the state of social issues previously discussed - unfortunately,

(2021): welcome to the 2020s, we have lingering trauma

THE PHOUSE?!?!?

- social media posts - the stereo shows

other dan and phil videos

- phil's solo videos - gay and not proud - hometown showdown - other joint videos - phil's #shorts (sounds normal in american english)

panini updates

- vaccines soon, uwu??? + entrenched misinformation - pros and cons of remote work - pros and cons of remote school - pros and cons of remote socializing

you will get through this night

- younger me really could have used this book too, dan - thoughts as a professional in a related field - reflecting on some of my more unique circumstances

daring my old school district to sue me (again!!)

- updates: racism and transphobia - updates: right-wing freaks take over the school board again - residents vote against improving mental health resources

(2022): dan returns (still not on fire)

hey so politics are um getting worse

- americans lose the right to reproductive freedom ---* the quickest of histories on where these freaks came from ---* this shit kills people. - trans kids become the punching bag of culture war discourse ---* fuck off! (gently) ---* fuck off! (i have a knife) ---* checking in on terf island

we're all doooooooooooooooomed

- dystopia daily my beloved - the style, the substance, the metatextual analysis-- - not everyone loved it, though. why? - the promo - dan on tour + sister daniel

amy's 2022

- i got covid - then i got long covid: brain fog, pots-like symptoms

some more news (i will work on my warmbo impression)

- dan joins tiktok + danisnotinteresting uploads - phil: uploading less, busy doing remote crisis management - twitter is acquired by an idiot jackass - heartstopper on netflix! ---* the show and what it means to people ---* drama (revisiting "real people can't queerbait") ---* why this has anything to do with the phandom

~ baking interlude 4: cinnamon rolls ~

- lovingly, recipe changes and corrections :) - if i have an opinion about anything, it's sweet yeasted breads

(2023): the phrenaissance

phil

- joins tiktok! - youtube uploads through september - what even is phannie tiktok. i've never used this app. help.

dystopia daily b-sides

- dan memes of 2022 - the 2023 dystopia daily episodes

amy: the doctoral candidacy process

- purgatory, privilege, poverty, and free pizza - checking in on what this is like outside the united states

pretending the panini is over

- complaining about post-adpocalypse censorship standards - honest take about "giving up" on covid - who gets the short end of the stick

the youtube algorithm is BAD and UNINTELLIGENT, actually,

- unhinged rant about not hearing about the gaming rephrival - because i was offline from other platforms. like, @amyoffline.

pov: you are a phannie (not me) on october 15th

- what i was doing on october 15th - saying goodbye forever, spooky week, and november - gamingmas - phil uploads through december

(2024): fifteen years of terrible, terrible influence

hey what the fuck is going on

- dan and phil ---* joint and phil videos ---* jokes they never would've made ten years ago ---* a collection of emotional posts about how far they've come ---* people want fun and silly content again. we'll get to why ---* nostalgia, hope, and other warm and fuzzy feelings - the phandom ---* ancient parasocial attachments, reactivated instantly ---* people are way more normal now. let's discuss why ---* tumblr vs twitter vs tiktok phandom

we're all doomed, youtube version

- my thoughts - thoughts on "dan should/shouldn't" do video essays - i can't objectively evaluate anything he makes bc [gunshots]

terrible influence tour

- legally phlonde - the concept: healing one's inner child / taking it back - we gotta talk about phannies in the global south again - no but seriously imagine it? ---*ogres are like onions, they have LAYERS ---* [placeholder for whatever does(n't) happen]

anglosphere current events once again

- the likely us tiktok ban - the tories get fired - [placeholder for whichever hell americans manifest] - witnessing genocide and feeling powerless

ffx full-circle moment to the intro of this video essay

- the night i found out they came back - why i am doing this, now with context - reflections on a nearly 15-year (parasocial) relationship

whatever youtube uploads we get during fall/december

AMY SEES TIT (nov 14)

- the vibes at the phamily reunion - buying merch to apologize for eternal ublock origin use - how much should i document?? (not during the show) - phanspiracies confirmed - atlanta confessions - favorite bits - the alternate universe where i went to tatinof and/or ii

(2025): the horrors persist, but so do we

whatever 2025 content is out while i'm still working on this

our parasocial social club

- let me be philosophytube for a second ---* every interaction has a parasocial element ---* what are we obligated to do as a phandom, actually? ---* as people who parasocially care about these two dorks? ---* what else should we be doing socially to be at our happiest? - "they're my gay uncles" vs "i'm a little in love, even now" ---* riffing about the boundary/overlap between these camps ---* sibling reads me for filth in a single text (sister daniel...) ---* at least we're all in this together

what's going to continue to draw people in

- grown adults drawing our cat whiskers back on - updates on queer/nd kids - updates on anxiety/depression rates - updates on tech and the broader environment of content - world still feels doomed

tangent - the "hard launch" and why people want it

what are people referring to, exactly

- general definition and other examples - when it comes to dan and phil - maybe they hard launched already and we just missed the memo

the ludonarrative of phandom

- if you got here early on - if you got here in the mid-2010s - if you got here after they came out - if you got here post-hiatus - final fantasy comparison: ffvii's chokehold over first-timers

a rom-com for the ages

- the tropes in play - brief tangent on the evolution of the genre - queer romantic comedies - final fantasy comparison: ffviii's plot and squall/rinoa

phriends… or…

- wholesome influence, slice-of-life - projection - final fantasy comparison: ffxv's gameplay loop, the chocobros

humans don't like ambiguity

- from a media perspective (narrative tension) - research from the hard sciences - final fantasy comparison: fanille ---* the first gay final fantasy characters, actually ---* ffxiii's character development process ---* fang and vanille in the text. brb, clawing at the walls ---* so, if anyone is looking for a phyuri au prompt…

tl;dr: reality is not fiction. make peace with not "knowing"

end tangent, back to your regularly scheduled programming

the phuture

- phil's big solo project when??? - dapg is just the joint channel now - youtube has changed since when dan last "regularly" uploaded - nothing lasts forever, and that's okay

~ baking interlude 5: ranch + pizza ~

- ranch propaganda and ranch metaphors - showing off my dough and sauce skills

conclusions

- a lot has happened in 15 years - [placeholders: don't write your conclusions before you do your research]

Proof this project can only be done in consultation with Tumblr: no other platform we're on could accommodate a post of this length and formatting detail lol

[papyriasks]

Heya, wanted to send in an ask about UF,US,SF and FS Papyruses (Papyri?) about how they show affection? Maybe how they pine after their crush? Whatever you wanna include just go wild with it! ☕🙏

The Papyri when they have a crush

(Underfell, underswap,swapfell, fellswap & fellswap Gold edition)

(Thank you for the ask too, I hope I answered it correctly :] )

UF (Boss): You will know this man likes you when you can start to get away with little things you couldn't before, instead of threats of violence when you sneakily "taste test" dinner he'll shoot you a side eye with a tap of his heel, or a pinch of the bridge bone when you've done something dumb. He has absolutely zero clue on how to initiate affection, but will subtly position himself in ways in which require you to brush past him or interact with him in some manner, craving your touch. When he gets bashful it often manifests as silent glaring, but you know him well enough that he isn't really angry. He is very cat like when pining over someone, in the sense that he pretends not to care for your presence at all but conveniently always ends up in the same room as you, and oh, he brought you food but not because he thought of you but just because it would go to waste otherwise definitely not any other reason..

US (Slim): Slim is a bit of a romantic, which surprises a lot of people as he isn't often very open about it, but he's the type to rock up to your work with a coffee and a baked good just to chill with you on your lunch break. He'll find out your star sign so he can read your zodiac love compatibility analysis online and looks for your initials on those "your initials your cats" tiktok slides. That being said he's still a bit of a hard one to get to know, sometimes you may catch him staring but if you go to say anything about it he'll just a quickly go to give you a quick ruffle on the head, call you pal and make a quick escape almost like he's shutting down any attempts to return affection. Secretly he's nervous to fuck things up, everyone expects him to be the laid back, no worries guy but letting someone in is letting them know he's got some baggage to him, and feels as though it will drive them away.

SF(Cash): If Cash has caught feelings for you, the first sign will be the fact you will be his new favourite person to annoy the fuck out of. Oh? You thought you were going to be able to quietly wash those dishes with nothing but your thoughts? Think again cause he's already leaning his full body weight against your shoulder pestering you. Cash hates sharing things but for you? You want it, it's yours now. Oh, you really like the bracelet he's got on? No sooner has he pulled you by the hand and transferred it from his wrist to yours. He always has an excuse to drag you along to some shenanigan or midnight adventure, but really he just loves having you around. He's a teaser, will tease you to no end, play the right card and tease him back and you might actually be able to fluster him. He's already a bit of a 'no idea what personal space is' kind of guy but if he's caught feelings he's always looking for opportunities to touch you, whether that's throwing his arm over your shoulder as you're walking or outright sitting right on top of you.

FS (Mutt): very protective, prefers to walk slightly behind you, always watching for any kind of threat and will challenge any stare with a twice as chilling one in return. is the kind of guy to silently notice that you're cold walking at night and without even asking he's draped his coat right over you. He's a little bit more bold in terms of how he behaves when he likes you, if you go to tease him he'll pull you in by the collar until you're a breath away and tease you right back. he's not the type to fall for someone easily , or even actively search in the first place, so if he ends up catching feelings know that he's set on you. The patient type, you don't need to return his feelings or like him back right away, but he'll wait, until it's the right time to have you. If you smoke he's always inviting you outside to share a late night smoke where the two of you will chat all night. Reliable and immensely loyal, will drop everything at any time of day or night to come help you with whatever you need if you so much as shoot him a text asking, though often times you won't even have to ask as he's often already lingering around uninvited.

FS Gold (Coffee): a nervous mess, and the definition of handsy. He is naturally very touchy with his friends so you might not pick up on his little crush immediately and you best believe he will fully well take advantage of that to constantly be all over you. He loves art and you will quickly become a big subject of his works, little squiggles in his notepad to full pieces of digital art. Can become a little jealous if he feels like you don't dedicate enough time to him despite not even being in a relationship with him. He will try to hide his crush from his brother as long as possible but once it comes out you better hope you're in his brothers good books.. that being said he won't stop gushing about you to Wine, you're always on his thoughts, and you're always his favourite thing to talk about. He's a lot more mischievous when he feels comfortable with someone and uses his more innocent and unseeming persona to drop subtle little compliments or semi-flirtatious lines to rile you up and then pretend like he had no idea what he said could be conveyed any other way.. if you do the same back he will 100% blush until his skull is another colour and will probably need 10-15mins to do a full reboot though.

[king-crawler]

HEY HI HELLO

Sorry for the random message here In the asks, it's ok if you don't see this or answer it since you probably got a lot already and I understand if you don't see this!/gen

But first of all, I just wanna say

I CANT BELIEVE I HAVENT WATCHED YOUR ANALYSIS VIDEO SOONER IM SO FUCKING LATE MAN

It's so well done and so fucking funny, I was literally smiling and cackling through the whole thing, it's shocking how similar our humor is

NOT TO MENTION THE END SCENE AREE YOU KIDDING HOW DID YOU MATCH THE LYRICS SO PERFECTLY TO THE FUCKING LORE ITS INCREDIBLE 😭💜/GEN, POS

It's insane how much dedication is put into it, let alone singlehandedly feeding turbo fans as myself

Genuinely thought it's so nice seeing more content for a hyperfixation I've had since 2012, and the fandom coming back along with this video Genuinely brings me so much joy as someone who's loved this movie since I was a kid

Sorry for the ramble but genuinely thank you for making that video, I can't wait to see what other stuff you do, wreck it ralph or not I WILL be tuning in/gen, pos

Okay second of all

The main reason why I'm sending this is because of sometning I noticed while rewatching a scene in the movie

Now, this might be me over analyzing as I usually do but it feels TOO. OBVIOUS.

SO

IN the kart bakery scene where vanellope and ralph go to bake a kart, they obviously make their way into the building and into the main room

You see all the Karts of course, and It pans to the one vanellope chooses

Which, at first glance you wouldn't really pay too much attention, especially when watching it for the first time, she's just picking the model she likes

..but looking back at the scene

Vanellope's kart model, how it was supposed to look, looks very

Familiar

Because the kart she chose..

...is a red and white kart

With stripes down the middle, with a very similar shape to a..certain persons kart. Now this might just be nothing, it's probably just like I said, and over analysis on my part

But the kart the chose looks WAY too similar to turbo's, not to mention the stripe is down the middle, just like turbo's car on the cabinet art of him

And vanellope could've chosen ANY kart

But it was that specific kart she chose, out of any of the karts

Not to mention in some of vanellope's concept art...

(Art made by Lorelay Bove)

..Vanellope's concept design and turbos designs strike SCARILY uncanny resemblances to each others designs

From the helmet and colors

All the way down to her GOGGLES having the SAME. YELLOW. TINT. that candy's have in the movie, which have the same effect here. There's no way that this didn't have the intent to mirror turbo purposefully

So with that in mind, the kart vanellope chose in the kart bakery scene being turbo foreshadowing, wouldn't be too out of place, nor would it be too far off

Turbo's foreshadowing was always prominent, even in the smallest details you wouldn't focus on, just like he's infecting this world as a virus, little by little, everywhere. You. Turn.

Aaaand that's basically all I have to really say

Sorry for the long ramble, I've been thinking of submitting this for awhile now, especially after I told a friend about this and they mentioned that this should be submitted to you

So I decided to go ahead and just do it, no matter how wild my comparisons might sound-

Anyways, I hope you have a good day, night, or what time it may be, and keep being awesome! I can't wait to hear back if you see this! Bye-bye! ❤️🏎🏆

P.s

I've been quoting these since I watched the video and haven't stopped

Thanks for destroying my humor even more-/pos

Okay bye bye now-

-skitters away-

NO YOU'RE SO FUCKING RIGHT OH MY GOD VANELLOPE WAS ALWAYS A TURBO PARALLEL??? CHAT IS THIS TRUE. IVE NEVER SEEN THAT CONCEPT ART OF HER TEEHEE THANKS FOR SHARING

also God. This is 99% just a coincidence with zero merit because its such a common gesture- but Ralph and Vanellope doing their thumbs up.. maybe Turbo parallels ?? and like the EXACT same poses too:

Vanellope having one hand on the steering wheel and the other doing a thumbs up while facing the camera.

Ralph hunched over doing the double thumbs up with the visor tinting his face yellow. EXCUSE ME HMMM?? WHAT THE FUCK??

NOW COULD I BE CHERRY PICKING? PERHAPS. but when Turbo has barely a minute of screentime, there's not a lot i can pick from, and things SURE ARE LINING UP... (I'm cherry picking)

SO SHHHHHH... ❤️❤️❤️❤️ LET ME HAVE MY LITTLE CONSPIRASCY

[group-dynamic]

i really enjoy your thoughts on the pitt and i’m sooooo happy to see someone that also ships mohan and abbott, my wild theory is they’re actually together but keep it a secret.

i’d like to hear more of your thoughts on them if you’d like to share.

thank you!

Oh thank you!! And abso-LUTE-ly!!

I don't even know if I have analysis for them, yet, I just can't stop staring at them, haha. For me it's how the entire perceived dynamic exists in the decisions between the actors and with the editors.

I think it would be hard not to ship them after witnessing that little smile-into-a-double take that Abbot does when Samira engages with him after he saves her patient. She is impressed and smiles so brightly and compliments him and then does that amazingly flirtatious line read of "What else you got in your go bag?" and almost automatically and distractedly he does, "Oh, just wait and see" and then, subconsciously, like he can feel her smiling behind him, his mouth pulls into a smile, and he can't help but do a double take after her. Oooohh my goddd??

They just. . . notice each other. My beautiful, subtle ship. The editors are helping to create this relationship through sheer force of will with how they linger on Samira's concern after she notices that Abbott is donating blood. How she is both impressed and seems worried and does her own double take to see if he's alright or if she should say something. I love your theory that they're secretly together, especially with the "I can feel you smiling" moment, like they're on the same wave length the same way they are when performing the risky operation in ep. 14.

I can also see an interpretation where this is the first time they're really "seeing" each other due to the novel, stressful circumstances they're under. That they're falling a bit because of what they each bring to the table: what the other lacks. Mohan's double take when she sees he's donating while actively saving lives felt so new--like she's unsure if she has a right to say anything if he doesn't register that what he's doing is painfully selfless and self sacrificial. It's par for the course to him, but she clocks that his behavior is also a lack of concern for his own well being. I love the idea of Mohan who carries love and care and patience for everyone being the person who our "ongoing existential crisis with suicidal tendencies" finds a reason to smile for. I love the idea of "nervous slo-Mo" Mohan being given the confidence to trust herself and be bold and charge forward by his faith and confidence in her.

It's also how he returns the favor of setting her up to feel good about herself the way she helped him. He guides her through an impossibly difficult procedure, hyping her up and being steady and certain and a shield against the voice of doubt (personified in Walsh in that moment). Oh man, it's how brightly Mohan smiles when she says, "Thanks" to him after he tells her to take the win. How he teases her ("It was too risky for me") in a way that simultaneously communicates: (1) I can be lighthearted / humorous, too, (2) I was also scared, tbh, even if I look confident, (3) I have more faith in you than myself. BIG heart eyes.

Finally, I'm still reeling over the knowing, sweet smile that Abbott gives toward Walsh after Mohan's "Am I the only one who missed that day in medical school?" comment. Like, I want to believe that Abbott was already smiling, then Walsh looked over and saw his reaction and went. . . Oooohhhh :) You think that was cute. I agree, it was, and he's all yeah, yeah. :)))) Biggest smile we've ever seen on him.

[blushblushbear]

Your opinions on the boys fashion sense? (I just really like your analysis and wanted to see more) :3

OH BOY, HERE WE GO *cracks knuckles*

so I like character design and also fashion so homie-- I'M ABOUT TO GO IN!!

read more cause I'm gonna do each of their outfits! (not doing the underwear and kigurumi cause those are just like--- undies and a onesie)

Also looking at their wikis for their sprites!

Ranking blank/10 with the final score at the bottom for each boy

GOD ALMIGHTY THIS TOOK FOREVER

Let's go!!

Nimh;

-base outfit: pretty good, very fitting for him, he's just a lil comfy guy-- lil comfy guy in some slacks and a sweater, a lil tie cause he's a lil gentlemen, lil professional, soft boy comfycore aho! 9/10

-halloween costume: meh-- a bit lazy but I guess it fits his comfycore vibes. Don't know why he's not wearing a shirt underneath his hoodie though-- isn't it cold??? also that candycorn choker SUCKS and low key I keep thinking it's a collar and it makes me question what parties he's going to 2/10

-butler: gonna be honest, the butler outfits are some of my favorite in the game. Love a man in a good suit and this tends to put the boys in better suits then their fucking masquerade suits half the time. he looks very dapper, I like the colors and the frills on the sleeves, 9/10

-masquerade: Ehhh-- I don't HATE it, but the date image is hard to make out and the sprites make it looks like it doesn't fit him right AT ALL. but I like the colors, again the frills on his sleeves are nice, it's not awful as fancy suits go--- eh 7/10

-summer: whaaaat the fuck is he wearing. This look does NOT suit him at all. this looks like the outfit of a dude whose going out fishing with the boys the majority of the summer, drinking beers and getting sun burnt low key the whole time. The outfit itself isn't the best but the fact that it fits him SO poorly-- I just can't move past it-- -3/10, ew no

-rpg: I know this is an element that's gonna come up again and again throughout this, but something about the way it's draw makes it look like it's not falling on him quiet right. That being said-- this is actually a pretty solid cleric design! it's a little generic but I'm not against that (especially here where half the game is broad archetypes), the colors are good, the design is solid, it fits him well over all 9/10

-kimono: again it sort of looks like it's drawn to not fit him properly, but over all it's not bad-- I'm not in love with it like I know I will be for some of the guys, but I don't hate it either--- over all he makes out better than most here I think 7/10

-pirate: okay full disclosure he wins A LOT of points for that hat-- that hat fucking slaps and in perfect for a bunny pirate. HOWEVER-- he also immediately looses points for that stupid fucking belt-- like legitimately wtf is that??? there's a lot of elements here I like, but none of them are coming together coherently and it just kinda makes it look like a bit of a mess. if you squint your eyes and blur your vision you can def see what they were going for, but I do think ultimately they failed-- 5/10 (and most of that 5 is coming from the hat)

45/80

Volks;

-base outfit: fairly solid! it makes him look like a pretty boy and also implies that when he's not actively in the woods he actually takes decent care of himself! Still like to headcanon that--- like--- his mom doesn't buy his clothes ANYMORE, but whatever sense of fashion or put togetherness he has is all thanks to his mom-- fully would've been a mess without her guidance. Also I would like to take this time to point out that canonically Volks is not wearing shoes in his main sprite, and therefore implies he doesn't wear shoes the majority of the time. Homie is dead ass free dawgin' it and that's so buck wild to me. 9/10, you'll get that final point when you put on some damn shoes

-halloween costume: so I'm actually quite the lover of 'skeleton but make it fancy/wild' for halloween-- the last time I dressed up for halloween (which was more recent than you think) I went as the grim reaper and fully painted my face but also had this glittery bottom half of a skull mask--- wild! but that's besides the point-- I think this is actually a pretty solid costume! could've used a touch more skeletal-ness somewhere else in here (maybe on the hands???) but over all I dig it! Also Volks in eyeliner! 8/10

-butler: so again it looks like it's not on him properly, but that aside-- punk butler, he's here to serve but not to follow your rules lol! I like that he's not in a jacket, could've used the sleeves rolled up I think, also that collar feels WAY too high-- I feel like they should've let that be a little unbuttoned and had the tie a bit looser. The thing is-- when you're a butler, if you don't have your jacket on, you're already out of uniform, so if he's dressed the part but not all the way like--- go all into that. Roll up the sleeves, untie the tie, unbutton those buttons-- make it look more like he's here to do the job and do it well, but he's not conforming to the rules cause he doesn't care about them. I THINK that's what they're going for here. Not half bad but it could've used another pass with a bit more mindfulness 7/10

-masquerade: again this is one of like-- they wanted him to be different, but didn't actually follow through with what that entails. First off-- he seems to be wearing his jeans. They're basically the same color as his jeans so if they're not his jeans, they sure fucking look like they are. And okay, if they're not, fix that so it looks less like he's wearing his jeans to a fancy party, but if they ARE his jeans, then you need to be careful what you put on top. For the record, I think they are meant to be his jeans and also low key high key I think that really fits his character-- but if that is the case then we needed to pull back a bit on how much is happening in his top half. Cause it just makes it look like his torso is at a party his legs weren't invited to. And for the record, I like the colors, I like the jacket (though it's WEIRD that he's wearing a vest and jacket with so many extra pieces but NOT a shirt????????) Idk-- there's a pretty good idea here, I just think it ultimately falls flat. this is another 'if you squint and don't look too closely it actually works really well' entry--- 8/10

-summer: HELL YEAH-- SUMMER IS FOR THE BOYS! FOR THE LADS LADS LADS! I like everything about this except the pattern on his shorts. Not that I'm against him having a goofy or loud pattern on his shorts, I just don't think it's the RIGHT goofy loud pattern??? Like I actually fully could believe that Volks would wear just the most--- aggressive shorts to the beach. Either that or the most plain boring shorts. Either way, another one that's so close but just not there for me--- 7/10

-rpg: Okay, Volks in general, has one of the BEST rpg designs. I like the colors, I like how the details are broken up, I like the over all design, I LOVE the touches of blue running through out-- I think the bigness of the costume and the bigness of a barbarian character like he's clearly going for here really just points out how much of a twink Volks really is, but it's fine. Just don't bring it up or he'll fly into a rage! 9/10

-kimono: oh man, I actually REALLY love this design. It's some good colors, they fit him well, the pattern is really solid and HOLY FUCK they made it actually look like it fits him well! Holy shit gang, we did it! 10/10

-pirate: Hm. So, I keep going back and forth on this one. For starters let's put the obligatory 'doesn't look like it fits him right' at the front of this. (that shirt--- it looks like it wants to be loose, but it's not???) The thing about it is, over all I really dig this design, but nothing about this really screams PIRATE to me other than the eye patch-- BUT ON THE OTHER HAND, if I picture him in a crew design-- like looking at the members of the ship as a whole, I wouldn't hate it! Like, it'd add a really nice sense of diversity in the designs of the crew! I'm not in love with this over all, but I also can't say it's not decently solid-- 7/10

65/80

Kelby;

-base outfit: Eh-- it's a pretty solid design. something about it looks like it's not fitting him right, but I don't know basket ball uniforms that well and cha boy looks pretty tall in his sprite so the fuck do I know. It's still a pretty solid design, and it definitely looks like a proper Basketball Uniform-- also that chicken logo is a hell of a lot better than it has any right to be--- 8/10

-halloween costume: ....homie you just wanna streak again. (I can't remember if Kelby streaking through a neighborhood is something that's canon Lads Shenanigans or just one of the headcanons I made all the way back at the start of this blog and thus convinced myself long ago that it's a legit thing he's done, but you can't convince me he wouldn't) -2/10

-butler: OH, I actually REALLY like this design! He looks a bit more like a steampunk extra than a proper butler, but that's not a bad thing honestly. I like the colors, I like those stripes on his vest and the way it goes with the striped texture on his shirt-- I LOVE that yellow for him and I LOVE that little tie-- don't know why that chains so big but I digress 9/10

-masquerade: god I just... I just don't know. There's a lot going on-- and I don't hate all of it, but I can't pretend any of this makes sense. We have a lot of colors that go well together right next to more colors that go well together, but those two pairs don't really fit at all--- it's honestly just kind of a mess.... 4/10 yeah... yikes....

-summer: again I don't really know if that pattern fits Kelby (and also another case of the clothes looking like they don't fit), but those colors are good on him and he's another person who would wear loud shit to the beach so--- eh 6/10

-rpg: I was about to say WOW KELBY BE GETTING DUST cause at first glance all I can think is how this shit fits him like he's wearing a dopey costume, but at further inspection--- YEAH. Actually! I really like it! It suffers a bit from The Belts Everywhere disease, and that waist belt is in the wrong place, but over all I think I like this. You got some nice colors, you have a leather pauldron on his bow arm, he's not wearing any kind of braces but he IS wearing leather gloves that go up his forearm a bit and would offer a bit of protection-- yeah! Yeah! I think this one's alright! That fucking hat is stupid though. Get him a new hat and we might just have something halfway decent for the ol' boy. for now though, 7/10 but a high 7

-kimono: again stuff feeling like it doesn't fit him properly... I'm not in love with the pattern but I do like that green. Also more in canon -proof that Kelby just wants to be naked. 6/10

-pirate: On the one hand, he looks like a parrot, and I can't really begrudge him for that or say that it makes it all look bad--- ON THE OTHER HAND.... holy shit this thing is such a mess.... it's just... it's so BAD.... there is a concept here, but lord this thing is just such a mess it can't help but lose the plot--- ugh 4/10 RIP my boy

42/80

Eli;

-base outfit: Okay, Eli's base outfit is weird in that it works but it also doesn't--- collared shirt and tie with pink sweater vest, but then grey capris with slip on sneakloafers and no socks???? or hopefully no show socks???? I just--- it's a mess but I don't full hate it and I won't lie, I do have friends who dress like that so---- 6/10??

-halloween costume: oh come ON babes-- you can do a devil better than that! Wears the sparkly red booty shorts from spirit halloween?? where's the smokey out eye shadow??? and a VEST??? Eli! Clearly this calls for a shirtless moment! You need to look one head bob horn loss away from stripper! Still, it's not WHOLLY terrible, but your def not gonna be getting the most numbers at the Abby in that--- 6/10 you're a heart breaker here and not how you wanna be

-butler: I'm going back and forth on whether or not I like the gingham-- I think ultimately I like it. It's a put together suit with a little flare of Eli and he wears it well! 8/10!

-masquerade: honestly, I really do think he fairs better than most here! The patterns work nicely, there's nice little touches here and there with the tassels, frills and bows, and I really like the color scheme for him! looks like a chocolate covered strawberry! very nice, sweet little candy coated prince charming-- 9/10!

-summer: okay I LOVE this outfit-- very fun, very summer, and I'm maybe a bit biased here cause BITCH that's how I dress when going to the beach too lmao-- 10/10 honestly

-rpg: Okay, I LOVE the concept of Eli being the tavern keeper! I also really like the outfit, though I will say it feels a bit plain for him?? where's my little pop of color?! And that little rag doesn't count! it's too muted. I feel like he could've used like--- a brightly colored jeweled earring dangling off one ear or a few rings-- maybe even a bangle or a flower or just like--- a pocket square of his own personal hankercheif and not what he uses to wipe the counters with. (The earring is my biggest bet) That all being said, he does look really dashing and frankly--- I would def try to seduce-- if only to get a free drink and a kiss-- maybe even a free room for the night??? maybe his??? wink! 9/10-- put on that earring and we'll talk about that last point

-kimono: I actually really like the patterns here! It's a bit too much for ME personally, but honestly it's perfect for Eli! He looks a liiiiittle bit like he's borderline swimming in it, but it's not as egregious as some of the other dudes-- 8/10!

-pirate: So the general consensus as far as my understanding is that Eli's pirate outfit is the best so far-- and honestly, aside from the fact that it looks a little too big and goofy on him, I ultimately agree! The colors are nice, I like the horse head on the end of his sword handle (that feels VERY Eli), and I like the dumb little addition of his hook hand doughnuts--- make it fit him better and look less like a mascot costume and I think we're really cooking here-- 9/10

65/80

Anon; (oh boy here we go-- the character I should find attractive by default but I don't...)

-base outfit: So over all I really like the general concept and colors of his base design but--- I dunno, just something doesn't land for me. Maybe it's that his hoodie is too tight??? Yeah idk, 7/10, I should like this more

-halloween costume: So I will say he gets some points for the 'fear the reaper' reference he makes in his dialogue-- but low key he kinda loses them again cause this is just a really weird reaper costume-- I don't fully know why he's showing skin??? like--- I feel like if you wanna go reaper you should be covered in all black-- AND SPEAKING OF ALL BLACK-- sir, why are your pants brown???? The chains are a nice touch I will admit but--- yeah, no, this just kinda lands with a thud for me-- 5/10 and I'm being generous, reaper to reaper

-butler: So I actually really like his butler design! The tartan belt is toeing the line of being a bit too much and again we have the problem of things not 100% fitting quite right (that sash shouldn't be as low as it is), but over all I actually really like this! Also I'd trust this man to clean my house--- eh, 8/10 but like a strong 8

-masquerade: so for the most part I like it, except I think is SO WEIRD how his formal suit jacket seems to just--- randomly have a hoodie hood??? like it looks like it's terrycloth??? why???? eh-- take that away though and I think this might be one of my favorites-- 8.5/10

-summer: Eh-- I don't hate it but I don't love it either.... I'm not finding too too much to say on it either so uhhhh-- 7/10

-rpg: OOOO I REAAALY like this one! I like the general layout of the design, I like his belt of vials and his cloak and vest and how he's fully covered cause he's handling chemicals but it also doesn't make him look boring--- I think if I HAD to give a criticism I would've liked to see a version of this where the green pulled more blue in order to more match his eyes-- but honestly that would take away from the toxic vibes were going for--- and those gloves fucking slap so hard--- 10/10, what can I say-- the lad's got me on this one

-kimono: I think I would've preferred it without the over coat robe. like-- I get the concept, and I don't hate the idea, especially cause it adds some variety in the kimono designs-- but man, I really hate that like---- weird techno pattern on the robe. Like I get what they were going for, but 1) it looks clunky and 2) it MAJORLY clashes with the fact that the main kimono is still rocking a more traditional kimono pattern, aka, nature themed. Maybe this could've been salvaged by either making the kimono match the theming of the robe or the robe match the theming of the kimono, but I dunno---- I see what they were trying at, but I do think it kinda fails--- 6/10

-pirate: Hmmm-- there's some elements here that work and some that just-- really really don't??? like--- I HATE the neon green on his jacket and hat. Like I get it, that kind of green looks very techno cyberpunk-- but like---- 1) you already have a more tealy blue color going in his jacket which doesn't match that kinda green and 2) he's a pirate??? like--- he's not supposed to look futuristic. If anything, it makes it all the worse that he has that fucking computer for like--- no reason. Take away the computer, the neon green and actually those weird random fur sleeve things while you're at it and I think we might actually have a half way decent design going--- for now though, 5/10

68.5/80

Garret;

-base outfit: I wish he was a bit beefer, but over all this is a really solid design for a guy like him-- 9/10 (needs some boots though-- those sneakers ain't gonna do shit for you out in the woods)

-halloween costume: See I'm torn--- on the one hand I think this goth-a-billy style frankenstein's monster look doesn't really suit the kind of guy Garret is-- but on the other hand.... I am so weak for this shit you have NO idea... 9/10 just cause my horny brain is winning out here

-butler: I actually really like this! I like the pattern on the uniform and they way it flows into the shape of it all-- I like the colors, I think they suit him well-- I also really like that his sleeves are up, that feels really correct for him-- yeah, I like it, 10/10 for this dapper man

-masquerade: So I actually really like this-- again the bits and bobbles fall in such a way that it guides your eye with the shape of the piece-- the shapes they chose really fit Garret and the clothes help add an extra level to his shape-- fuckin hell man, I guess they really know how to dress Garret-- 9/10

-summer: Eh--- it looks a little goofy but I can't say it looks wrong for Garret-- also take away those water wings and towel and we're basically perfect sooooo 8/10??

-rpg: So I'm a little torn on Garret being a monk, but I guess over all it's fine. I don't love the stuff going on at the top, but over all it's a pretty good design-- 7/10

-kimono: Oh man, I'm really torn here--- I know the vibe of dress they're going for here but the fact that the straps at his shoulders are leather--- aren't they supposed to be cloth or something??? idk-- it looks weird to me.... 7/10 but like-- a solid 7 this time

-pirate: Oh god, talk about big and cartoony in a bad way... this just looks really ridiculous... I don't understand their need to make this look like wacky cheap halloween costumes instead of like--- actual pirate fantasy.... but oof, Garret's might legit be the worse of all-- 3/10 and that's a LOW 3....

62/80

Dmitri; (OH SHIT IT'S OUR BOY DMITRI, what a meme this man has become)

-base outfit: So I never understood why his base design has random fucking numbers on his hip??? like-- it doesn't make him look like a romantic or artistic, it makes him look like he's a dude bro who doesn't know how to dress. Get rid of that and I feel like we actually have something to work with-- 8/10

-halloween costume: Oh no--- oh-- just--- NO.... 2/10

-butler: I actually really like this one! I like the cut of the jacket, the shape of the outfit, the colors, the little details on the sleeves-- not half bad! 8/10

-masquerade: Yet another dude where the texture on his pants makes it look like they're jeans-- that mixed with how busy and top heavy his coat is-- the colors are nice and I like the ideas behind it-- but woof that execution is ROUGH-- 4/10

-summer: WHOA WAIT WAIT A MINUTE WAIT--- WHEN DID HE GET THIS?! THIS LOOK SOOOOO FUCKING GOOD! The patterns, the colors, the nice like 'I'm on a vacation but a kind of nicer ritzy one' vibe-- very classy, BRUH he actually looks so good!! Ya know, for the outfit in general and how well it matches his vibe-- 10/10, when they know how to dress this fuck they REALLY know how to dress him!

-rpg: I actually really like this one too! I do sort of wish they went for a more purple blue with his main blue-- so like that darker blue and then a more indigo color-- cause I think that'd match him more/look better on him/would sync up more with his eyes-- but aside from that this is actually a really solid design! It's a little derivative but low key this whole game is based on being derivative and he's defiantly the type of character whose not afraid to be cliche! 9/10! low key wish he had a flower somewhere idk why

-kimono: Eh-- another one that kinda looks like it doesn't quite fit him right, but I like the colors, I like the design of the pattern, there's actually a lot of boars in japan and the roses fit him well-- 7/10 cause it's not bad but I'm just not excited about it

-pirate: this looks like an Aladdin oc in a bad way... I like the color palette on him but past that it has all the maladies of the rest of the pirate line-- too big, too messy, too outrageous, just--- not mcloving these in general... 4/10

42/80

Ichiban;

-base out: Oh boy, here's Definitely Not Markipler-- so I'm not huge on the whole 'quirk loud streamer' type-- and I'm not saying Mark is that (in fact I think he's legitmately not the majority of the time), but this is Mark if he WAS that. An uwu, bright colors, pixels cause Oh Wow I'm Such A Gamer, scream talking into his kitty head set in his gamelabs chair with his light up led multi-screen set up-- basically I'm saying on a good day, I don't like this shit, and this is kind of a boring version of that sooo... 3/10-- hair looks alright though (what are those random leather wristband things????)

-halloween costume: LMAO-- okay, so I hadn't SEEN his costume before, and me and a friend who does not play blush blush have a running joke where he INSISTS one of the boys from Phone Fling (he will not specif which) is CLEARLY Jackspecticeye ('Jokspoopyeye') and it's all that comes up when we talk about blush blush the barely amount of times that we do-- I need to show him this cause THIS is some jockpoppyewes vibes XD uhhh-- it's lame but in a way that I'm p sure it's what he's going for so--- 7.5/10 for irony?? (for the record we both like Jack, we just also like being annoying lmao)

-butler: I actually really like this! I like the colors, I like the shapes, I like those stripes and that big poof tie-- yeah, okay, I can dig on this one-- 8/10

-masquerade: Ah. Hm. AH. WELL. So here's the thing--- I am, an avid lover of checker patterns-- I literally have 4 things in my sight currently patterned with checkers (two different blankets in two different colors, my backpack/purse, my wallet and I would have a fifth if I could actively see my hair clip inside) and I mention so that y'all are aware that it speaks VOLUMES to how wild it is that they made me not like checkered pants. They're giving jeans vibes again, also they don't go with a top that busy. I like the colors, I like the fading pixels on his scarf-- HELL, I'd probably even like the pants, but not like this... not like this... 4/10 (I do like the shape of the coat though-- there's a lot of good bits that just---- don't work together)

-summer: This is another time a guy has a set color/aesthetic identity and they just--- for go it for no reason-- it's a really clunky design, it looks like shit, and it doesn't fit him-- both style wise and also like--- on his body-- 3/10 only cause those shorts are nice I guess

-rpg: Hmmmm-- not sure why he's a barbarian but I do like this design alright-- I think I would make the flare cape a little shorter in order to convey that it's just there as an accent and doesn't look like it just disappears across his shoulders but all in all this is alright--- maybe something on his hands that look like claws to really add to the theming of being a tiger themed barbarian, but it's not too bad 6/10

-kimono: Oh man, this is a thing me and Ren have actually talked about before where some of the guy's posing really makes it so you can't fully see their outfits, and this ones a big offender of that-- which sucks cause I like the ideas I can see-- the kinda simple flowers, I don't LOVE the pixel/checkered pattern on his sleeves (that pattern already exists in kimonos and yukatas, it's called Itchimatsu and it's honestly best when it takes up the whole of the kimono imho) but I don't HATE it-- the greens are also nice and what little I can see of the tiger looks alright-- don't love those little paw prints though, that's one thing too many here--- if I were to actually offer a fix-- full checkered pattern, either with that green and pink or a muted version of that since the tiger and flowers would still be there, and then maybe if you want paw prints, have them either on the front or on the back visually leading TO the tiger-- like it's prowling across him! All of this is a moot point since you can't even see it though cause of the posing of the character---- 4/10 big rip

-pirate: (this ones not on the wiki for some reason, had to have my friend send it to me) He actually fairs pretty well compared to some of the other guys! The outfits nice and it makes sense for him-- the random tattoo legit had me double checking if it's exclusive to this outfit lol-- but yeah, pretty good over all-- 8/10

43.5/80

William;

-base outfit: So I think William in general is actually pretty basic, so I'm not super taken aback that his base outfit is pretty much just Doctor. It's definitely very professional, sort of wish the shirt pulled a little more of a green blue to bring out his eyes more, but it's still really nice. THAT FUCKING TIE THOUGH-- the tie's not bad, I just can't imagine EVER wanting a thing around my neck that can be grabbed on to and tightened in a job working with animals-- that seems like a good way to accidentally get choked out by an angry cat or a dog that just saw a blue thing and tried to take it. Get rid of the tie, fully for safety reasons, but besides that-- 7/10

-halloween costume: basic bitch dude in a basic bitch costume-- but honestly it's a pretty solid costume so I can't fault him for that. Wish the vest fit him better, LOVE the little beenie baby on his shoulder-- I am a spooky bitch that loves a prop! And a cute little dinky one at that-- for that you sir get an 8/10

-butler: first off before we get into anything, I think if there were two dudes I would actually fully trust to clean the shit out of my house, it'd be William and Anon-- also with that said, I actually really like his butler design! It looks like it fits him weird in some places and I need this man to dress more stream lined cause I feel like that'd fit his character better (so less frills and the like-- nothing that could get in the way, just straight sexy business all day till sunday) but for what we got it's not half bad-- 8/10

-masquerade: so this is the one place I will fully accept frills from this man-- and this is actually a pretty good suit! They need to fix that vest (if THAT MUCH shirt is showing, then you drew it wrong, low key looks like a mid drift) but past that, it actually all works really well for him. Also more of him rocking his blue-- 9/10

-summer: It's giving dorky dad on vacation-- it's giving William at his truest self. The design doesn't look good but in that gaudy vacation kinda not looking good way-- 8/10, I could see him doing that thing from Us where the dad wakes up his sleeping kids in the back seat by screaming 'WE MADE IT!!!!' at the top of his lungs as a prank lol

-rpg: Oooooo I REALLY don't like this. It's not making clear what's actually going on with the outfit, it's not clear where things lay on other another, or what material it's made of, everything is on him just a little bit weird--- just... no... I... no-- 0/10 genuinely don't get what this design is going for (like I DO, but they did not stick the landing AT ALL)

-kimono: Like the blue, like the colors, don't like the design of the details on it, LOTUS PODS HATE THOSE, 5/10

-pirate: (another that is not on the wiki) Oh he's got a little guy!!! Love that lil guy! Also I'm liking this outfit-- it's suffering from the same shit the rest of them are where they look too big and goofy and cartoony to really be taken seriously as a romantic fantasy (I'm down for SOME looking big and goofy, but not everyone), but he actually comes out rather nice in this one-- I like the colors and the implied leather shoulders of his shirt cause-- ya know-- bird (or birdS) yeah, ya know, this ones alright-- 7/10

52/80

Myx;

-base outfit: ya know what this base design is actually pretty good-- it gives the vibe that he's like a chill music guy pretty well! 8/10

-halloween costume: Oof-- I'm sure this is like a monster prom reference or something, but I think it looks really dumb-- eh, 6/10

-butler: Finally a guy with his sleeves pushed up-- uhhh, it falls on him weird but other than that it's a pretty solid design-- I like the green he has and the little pattern at the collar-- 7/10

-masquerade: I feel like they're trying to go for a rock star thing, but all the bits and pieces are just a weird amalgamation of 'this is a rock star look' without any of it being properly cohesive-- also the fact that the pants don't match his top--- it's just kind of a big mess, 3/10

-summer: Eh-- it looks pretty boring and unfitting-- like they didn't know what to put him in so they just put him in Clothes with some music notes and went 'that's good enough!'-- 6/10 cause it's not bad, but it's not really good either

-rpg: I actually kinda like this-- the outfit is decent, it flows together alright, it fits his character pretty well--- yeah, okay 7/10

-kimono: This is mostly good and could've been better, but the addition of just some random instruments on his pattern are really clunky-- 5/10

42/70

Stirling;

-base outfit: OKAY-- his design is so weird, but he's such a weird fucking character, I'm willing to give it a pass-- 9/10 I have no idea what this fuck would look like otherwise lol

-halloween costume: Meh-- pretty boring witch design-- he's trying to be Howl or something I guess but legit feels too basic for a flamboyant bitch like him. Also why the sunglasses??? just-- nah-- 4/10 he can do better

-butler: Oh he has a very classic butler design! And it actually works really well on him! Some of the stuff is not falling where it's supposed to be (why does his jacket stop but his vest keeps going?? they're both too short AND too long) but otherwise I really like it, and I really like it for him! 9/10

-masquerade: Homie-- you should SLAY this outfit, but it's just an elevated version of your base outfit. It's both too much and too boring-- 4/10 I'm shaking my head here bud

-summer: Noooo... I get what they were going for but they REALLY failed-- also this is where we finally get into the problem that like-- he wears a lot of sequins, but they don't know how to texture sequins properly, and it's ignorable in his other outfits but here it's just front and center... not only does it look like ass design-wise, but it's REALLY failing to look like--- clothing-- that's like-- on him, and laying down, with movement and weight-- just.... Nah man.... mhm.... -2/10 (nice shades tho I guess)

-rpg: Eh-- I mostly like this. The design is decent and the colors are nice-- I'm down for him dming though I worried the game will suffer the moment he gets bored lmao (he seems like that kind of dm)-- I also wish they made more clear what the golden snake is supposed to be-- I think it's just a floating bit of accessory like say, Karma in league, has-- but over all I like it okay-- 7/10

-kimono: OOOOOO I actually REALLY like the design on this one! It's so nice! It's really good for him! 9/10

40/70

Scale;

-base outfit: Oh boy-- Scale's how deal is just-- pretty messy. I get what they're going for but man oh man is it clunky as fuck. I will say, it's a VERY distinct design-- just... not in a good way. I still seem to have a soft spot for this animu mess though soooo-- 7/10??

-halloween costume: No. Just.... no... OOF... uhhh.... him being barely legal makes me SO COMFORTABLE here I'm not gonna lie... also it doesn't even look good... YIKES. -3/10 OOF

-butler: ANOTHER GUY WITH HIS SLEEVES ROLLED UP! /AND/ HE DITCHED THE SUIT JACKET! THIS MAN MEANS CLEANING /BUSINESS!!/ Also just in generally I think it fits him REALLY well. He looks young and determined and like he's not playing around on this. I could legit seeing him being on some kinda butler anime like this-- it's pretty nice. 9.5/10!

-masquerade: Oof... like--- it's not a bad design, it's actually a really GOOD design, but OOF.... white boy... why you dressed like that.... like I'm sure there's an in canon lore reason that the writer's just--- NEVER SPELL OUT-- but legit like-- a white dude wearing Asian style clothes to a masquerade that is a) western style, b) seems to take place somewhere in North America (I always assumed Canada since that's where the studio's based) and c) has mostly other people dressed in western style clothing--- yeah it's a yikes a for me. At BEST, it seems like he actually grew up in east asia and at WORST it seems like he's about to run up to me and tell me how his week in japan changed his life or something... Like, it's a good design, don't get it twisted but... yeah.... ALSO WHY ARE YOU SMOKING?! PUT THAT DOWN! idk-- 6/10, would be higher if it didn't make me worry how much I'm about to cringe...

-summer: Oh, NO-- no, uh--- nah-- this looks a little too young for me, dead ass looks like the bug catcher kid in pokemon-- I know he's young, but this feels like toeing the line of infantilization-- nah I'm good 4/10

-rpg: I'd like this more if it weren't for the weird cut outs at the chest and sides??? Ugh, and the weird b/d/s/m style random straps-- I'm legit starting to notice a pattern of them either aggressively sexualizing or infantilizing Scale... I don't like where this review is going now... uhhh--- 7/10 take out the weird cut outs, him of all people seems like he'd NOT put up with useless armor bullshitery

-kimono: I really like this design, but following the other two designs, i don't know how to feel about him stuffing snacks in his kimono like a kid... the design of the kimono is pretty good though-- uh, 9/10

Oh man... I did-- NOT like where that Scale one took me... yuck-- just-- yucky feeling in my me... blugh... (also I'm learning today that tumblr did not like some of the words that I used to describe Scale cause two of them it diiiiid not even acknowledge existed-- I'll let you guess which two...)

46.5/70

Sven;

-base outfit: Uhh-- it's pretty good! I can't fully articulate the vibe that I'm reading off of this, but I do see the vision. Fairly solid, 8/10

-halloween costume: Oh, no, no no--...no. I'm a dingus scarecrow lover, but this design is just.... awkward-- bad awkward... why is he shirtless?? I just--- nah--- 2/10

-butler: Uhm-- so-- this doesn't look butlery enough XD full on, looks like a kid going to church BUT with a fancy fluffy tie thing! Nah, this doesn't work like how they want it to-- uh-- 3/10

-masquerade: Okay now this, this I like! It's a pretty solid design, I like the coat, I like the colors, I like the details-- alright, let's go Sven nation we got a good one-- 8/10

-summer: ANNND RIGHT BACK TO NO! I like how even clicking to see it I was like 'I am so scared' and I was right to be. It's pretty awful, but it's also pretty Sven so.... 4/10 I guess?? big oof man

-rpg: AH! GET IT! CAUSE HE'S A FUCKING JOKE! /getsshot but nah, UHHHH-- it's alright-- I kinda don't under the mid drift but I also kinda do cause I could see Sven rocking that--- ehhhh 7/10 jingle jingle you fool

-kimono: OH HEY-- I actually really like this one! I like the colors, I like the patterns, it works really well on him! It's actually really nice! Look at that, Sven got a good one! Ya know what-- 9.5/10! Good job Sven

41.5/70

Cole; (ah shit, here we go) (low key part of me doesn't even need to look at these, I already know what they look like LMAO)

-base outfit: Very good, Very fitting, Love how he looks just a liiiiiittle bit messy-- honestly I really like this design both in general and for this character-- 10/10 (also homie is SHRIMPIN' IT!)

-halloween costume: UGH-- this one-- It's not bad, it just feels really dumb. I know it's here cause of Yandere Simulator but eh--- also that's so clearly blood and they went so nuts with it--- I will say I recently thought about the idea of painter Cole cause a lot of pigments are toxic-- but eh, for this though.... 7/10??? it's kind lame honestly...

-butler: I LOVE his butler design-- the fact that he's wearing black leather gloves is very Clue to me, which I think is what they were going for--- idk I just really like this design both in general and for Cole-- 9/10

-masquerade: OOF the mask... but that aside--- I actually really really like this suit-- I LOVE the colors, the little detailing on the vest, the spikes might be a bit too much (giving too much away there Cole), but over all I think this is just a really good suit and it suits him well! 9.5/10

-summer: And here we see Cole in full goober mode! I don't LOVE the pattern on the shorts, I might've liked this design more if they were just straight red, but that little shark towel hoodie is just so perfect-- what a dork! 9/10

-rpg: I actually REALLY like this design for Cole-- I don't really think how open his shirt is suits him, BUT THE REST OF IT-- I love how plain most of this is-- it's a very basic set of clothes, but then as we keep traveling up the body, we get those SPIKES and that GLOVE-- that plus how nice that fucking scythe looks--- honestly 9/10, it's really nice!

-kimono: Honestly I think this is one of my favorite Kimono designs-- Cole's usual black and red works really nice here, BUT THEN THE ADDITION OF THOSE GHOSTLY LILIES! And the fucking red string is SUCH an amazing touch! I don't love the zig zag pattern on the collar, but other than that, this is AMAZING-- 9.5/10

63/70

Poe;

-base outfit: Oh man, Poe-- GOD I love Poe. I REALLY love this base design! It's just such a good goth kid design! It has the right amount of Extra but is not SO CRAZY OUT THERE-- like a lot of goth really do roll like this with just touches of extra over something really base-- also I kinda love that his hair and his eyes just ALLLL most match--- I feel like that is also really true to life with goth kids XD--- man, Poe is just such a good design! I love Poe! 10/10, legitimately one of my favorite designs in the whole damn game

-halloween costume: I'm kinda torn between I wish he'd gone more with something like white with black, almost like a stark bleached mime, but also knowing that this classic vaudeville style mime is -exactly the kinda reference a dude like Poe would make--- eh, 6/10

-butler: God, this one edges on being A Bit Too Much-- but I can't fully hate it?? It's giving Black Parade mixed with Black Rock Shooter and just generally early 2000's emo--- meh, fuck it uhhhh--- 7/10??

-masquerade: Again, legitimately one of my favorite designs in the game! It doesn't really fall on him just right, but I fucking LOVE the design! The mask, the touches of green, the pattern of his coat--- the small touches of red in his scarf and hat--- MWAH! 10/10!

-summer: I actually really like this! I've legit seen people roll around like this in the summer-- feels a little 2000's but fuck it-- 7/10 (homie is gonna have the weirdest tan lines lmao)

-rpg: I don't love it but I don't hate it-- a lot of really cool elements but most of them are not coming together cohesively enough for me--- he gets points for the bird, but not many-- 6/10

-kimono: I LOVE this design-- I like the colors and the patterns and his outer robe and HIS LITTLE EARRINGS-- I will say the skulls look kinda weird to me-- they're both a) not drawn that well and b) drawn in different styles almost??????? idk, it's still pretty good hmmmm-- 7/10!

53/70

Cashew;

- base outfit: I actually really dig this design-- he looks like Just Some Guy, but he is Just Some Guy-- just a little college boy, going to coleg! Little cutie patoot! (who would've not been able to get rid of me if he was in college when I was just sayin') 8.5/10 (side note, I LOVE how he canonically comes to your dinner date in a full suit with his dorky little tie! GOD what a goob)

-halloween costume: It's dumb, but it's exactly the kinda dumb a broke ass college kid would do-- 8/10 for accuracy alone

-butler: Aww, he's adorable! Just a little guy with a little bow tie! 8/10, what a cutie

-masquerade: I actually really like this, he looks like a reject from the theater department! I actually think it suits him and who he is as a character and WEIRDLY the fact that he was a squirrel really well-- his is one of my other favorites! 8/10

-summer: I love this actually! Another goob on vacation look! I also love how his shirt isn't buttoned, he just closed it by buckling his fanny pack-- what a dork, 8/10

-rpg: Again I just love this one! He's just a dorky lil guy! And this squirrel knight design SLAPS-- 9/10

-kimono: I like the pattern A LOT but I don't get the leaves in his hair??? LIKE, I get why they're there I just--- don't think it was necessary or really adds anything??? eh-- 8/10 we're ignoring the leaves

57.5/70

Seth;

- base outfit: oh man, I really just hate Seth's design... like I guess for what they're going for it's alright, I just-- /REALLY/ creatively disagree with the route they chose for his character... THAT HELL HOUND DESIGN SLAPS THOUGH! for this--- eh, 6/10??

-halloween costume: Ehh-- the design is alright actually--- hmmm 7/10

-butler: I don't like how unclear that white/blue vest is-- Also I might've liked it more if his pants matched-- like he was just in a white suit?? I also don't hate the bow tie, but it feels really unfitting for him???? idk-- 7/10

-masquerade: So for the most part I like this design except for the spikes-- 1) too big, 2) too bone-like, it should've matches his horns instead, and 3) well fuck me if I wanted to dance closer to you, why do you have spikes on your front for a romantic evening??? No cuddling allowed I guess-- Also I do kinda wish they had done SOMETHING with fire, given how much it's a key element of his hell hound design--- but past all that-- eh, 7/10

-summer: hmm, no, this just--- two busy patterns together do not a good design make--- and the fact that that shirt REALLY does not look like it fits him for shit--- 2/10, just nah

-rpg: Okay, we're bringing in GREEN out of nowhere--- I'm actually a big fan of green, especially a teal, with a red-- but lord this design is just a mess-- also it doesn't use the one element I like hardly at all----- jeez, uh... 4/10

-kimono: Uh, I actually really like this-- it pulls from Onis and I think it does it pretty well-- 8/10

41/70

Reece;

-base outfit: Ah yes, my favorite british pop culture rip off-- I actually really like this base design! It's simple but it works, I like the colors, he looks nice! 9/10

-halloween costume: I am just now realizing I never saw his halloween design-- uh-- no?? Just, no??? It looks really weird and clunky and too much like Real Space Suit and not enough like Fun Space Suit Costume-- 2/10

-butler: I really like this design aside from the tie-- either you should've kept him in green or only used the yellow from the scarf--- Or just awkwardly have him in a scarf, I think that would've been a more in character solution! For now though-- 7/10 (but I REALLY wanted to give it an 8 just cause of how much I liked the rest of it, the blue, the watch, IT'S SO CLOSE TO PERFECT!)

-masquerade: Meowsquerade! God it's so much but I don't hate it! It's so much, it's SOOOO MUCH-- but damned if it don't work! Uhhhh--- 8/10!

-summer: GOD--- why did they make it lay against him like that--- I KINDA HATE IT????? Uh--- 6/10 moving ON

-rpg: So I kinda hate this??? I hate how pretty much everyone else feels like they're dressed in actual clothes and he looks like he's wearing a shitty costume??? There could've been something here, but it's just too awkward and clunky for me-- 6/10

-kimono: I actually really like this design! The colors are good, the pattern is good and I love how they made his scarf the--- fuck I forget the name-- obi???? THE THING WHAT GOES AROUND HIS WAIST--- but yeah, 8/10!

46/70

Logan;

- base outfit: He's just a fireman-- but I'll be damned, he's a fireman! -And a hot one! 9/10 let's see if he can bridal carry me ;3

-halloween costume: He's just a fireman again this time, but goofy and sexy and with a little plush dog and ya know your girl likes a prop! 9/10 (I'd go as a sprinkler, and I'd be COVERED in glitter!)

-butler: A little basic but I don't hate it-- 8/10

-masquerade: this design is almost there for me but-- I dunno, something about it is just not working for me--- like the cape that's pinned to a shawl??? but not on the shoulder, it's pinned to the front??? what??? There's an idea here, it's just not there yet--- 7/10

-summer: Just a dude in summer, but he is a got dude in summer sooooo--- 7/10

-rpg: I like the colors and that his little fireballs are otters-- but idk something about this just doesn't feel correct--- 6/10

-kimono: Oooo I REALLY like the pattern! And the colors! It looks like it doesn't fit him quite right, but aside from that-- 9/10!

55/70

Aki;

- base outfit: so all the base designs for the kistune are like--- 10/10 so good-- I really like the blue they picked for him, I like his dumb Sora Kingdom Hearts hair, I like all the little details on his robe-- this is just a really solid design, yeah 10/10 here

-halloween costume: I mean I get the costume, it's just kind of 'I'm a thing but I mostly have my shirt off' kind of boring that I hate seeing but this game keeps doing-- hmmm, 6/10

-butler: I really like this outfit! That shade of red is perfect for him and I love the little golden yellow accents-- kinda wish they'd done SOMETHING with his hair since it really doesn't fit with the rest of the outfit, but other than that it's pretty good-- 8/10

-masquerade: So in general I think all the kistune get it pretty rough in their masquerade outfits (they're all dressed similar but I could not for the life of me tell you want that aesthetic is) but honestly I think Aki gets it the best of them! The design of the outfit as a whole is decent and I LOVE the accents on the cape-- kinda wish he was dressed in something else but this isn't so bad-- 7/10

-summer: I get the archetype his outfit is pulling from but it just a little awkward on him-- but it doesn't look too bad and they do use the waves which I think suit Aki so well I used it in my own modern clothing design so--- 7/10

-rpg: boring, awkward fitting, not his color and it's weird to imply he's in a full body fishnet suit and if that's not just an implication then that's even weirder-- honestly one of the weakest rpg designs, kitsune or other wise-- 4/10

-kimono: so generally speaking the kitsune seem to not be wearing actual kimono's for most of their outfits under 'kimono' accept for Aki, who, for the record, LOOKS AMAZING! The leaves, the colors, the little Great And Powerful Aki: Fox Form Edition that's frolicking around his sleeves?? MWAH! 10/10!

52/70

Haru;

-base outfit: like I said at the top of the kistune order, all the kitsune designs are some of the best designs to appear in the game and Haru is no exception-- The hair, the patterns on his robes, the tattoos, the bracelets, the appropriate amount of tit-- and he's just so damn HANDSOME! I do think the one thing I thought back when he first came out, and I think a thought I saw at least one other person vocalize, is why the spring guy isn't in pink when japanese springtime is so pink naturally, and while I'm definitely used his colors now and do think it's better over all than pink would've been, I will spoil that my modern design for him does put him in pink-- that being said he is beauty, he is grace, and he's a 10/10

-halloween costume: and we went from a 10 to one of the worst costumes in the game and that's saying something--- it's just a mess and not even a hot mess (not even on Haru) 1/10 tsk tsk tsk

-butler: so he's another dude whose outfit doesn't look like it's fitting him correctly, but with that being said, I REALLY like this outfit on him! The colors ESPECIALLY! That black and maroon with a touch of that tealy green with the matching hair tie??? 9.5/10 only losing that half point cause it really does look like it doesn't fit him well for SHIT

-masquerade: Oh, these are the ones I'm dreading for the kitsune-- I just legit don't know what they're going for here. That plus it again doesn't look like it's on him right (Haru actually gets the short end of this particular stick and majority of the time)-- with that said, I like the THEORETICAL shape of his coat, I like the colors, I'm down for the vine patterns on his sleeves (every rose has it's thorns I guess)-- I could do without the weird netting that's hanging over his shoulders, but hmmm 7/10 I like the indigo

-summer: pulling from another japanese summer archetype and idk if it's cause I like Haru more or cause he's just more handsome, but I really feel like this fits him better than Aki's fits Aki--- maybe I'm just distracted, but 9/10

-rpg: OOF, more of the kitsune having it rough in the rpg stuff-- Haru's is passable only cause he's basically a different version of naked but with horns this time-- idk-- I think it was Cosmic who did an edit of this in pink instead of the yellow and honestly that might've been just the touch this outfit needs to elevate it--- as it stands though-- eh, 7/10

-kimono: So I'm so torn-- on the one hand I really think this suffers a lot from like--- it not being put on him properly--- in general the artists seem to forget which way his torso is facing and how the line of action flows through his pose-- and it's made even worst cause this is a bigger bit of clothing so it's easy to loose the character in the clothes (like-- look at his arms, they seem to forget how long his arms actually are and in comparison to the rest of him--- idk there's some proportions errors going on here, this one really needed tweaking)-- PAST THAT THOUGH-- idk, it's not REALLY a Kimono, but it is a ceremonial thing that we probably wouldn't otherwise see Haru in-- and I like the colors on him, I like those rich pinks and deep purples, I like how his face is just on there-- and the ribbon in his hair, they need more ribbons in his hair in the future when he dresses up! Also I could've maybe done with changing his bracelets-- maybe to match his ribbon-- I dunno... eh-- I'll give it 7/10--- wish it was just a cute little kimono like everyone else but oh well

50.5/70

Fuyu;

-base outfit: second (third) verse same as the first! All the kitsune have amazing base designs. Fuyu's touches of colors are really strong here-- also they span a wider range than at first glance, but it all feels really cohesive! I could've done with his face looking a bit older (Haru's face looks older than his due to having a line under his eyes), but yeah, no, this is a good character design 10/10

-halloween costume: meh-- it's kinda boring but it's on theme for the kitsune and isn't HALF as bad as the other two-- 7/10

-butler: honestly one of my favorite butler designs in the game-- I like the blue they put him in, I love the pattern on his jacket, I love the pocket watch-- 9/10

-masquerade: Oof, yeah-- I was looking forward to this one the LEAST-- it's just so much and none of it makes a damn bit of sense and he just kinda looks ridiculous--- yeah 6/10 and that's only cause I like Fuyu himself to go any lower

-summer: This is actually one of my fav outfits for him-- I love his yukata, I love his lil ponytail, I love his dumb fish--- 9/10, this is a fun one!

-rpg: a bit derivative but I think he fairs better than the other kistune-- also I think the coloring here is really solid! I like the snow flakes at the bottom of his robe--- not sure about one nipple out like that, but eh-- 6/10, it's okay

-kimono: Okay.... I know this is SOMETHING, this is a traditional garb of SOME KIND, but this is NOT a fucking Kimono. Like... just.... it's not even KIND OF a kimono! and while I like the little symbols/seals being of him, 1) why is it half buttoned??? that just makes him look sloppy and 2) I'M NO JAPANESE HISTORIAN, BUT ISN'T THIS LIKE--- COMMONER CLOTHES??? Bruh, I really don't know, but I can tell you what it's not-- a fucking kimono... 6/10

53/70

Ace;

-base outfit: he's mostly just-- Some Guy, but he's a very handsome version of that, and low key does look a bit basebally soo-- 9/10

-halloween costume: homie does not look like he's going to a party as anything but a stripper... still, a damn good stripper-- 8/10??

-butler: so again, doesn't really look like it fits him right, but over all I like it! Could do without that dracula tie pin, especially since you have another bat pin right next to it-- but eh, 7/10

-masquerade: Oo, I actually really like this one! It's different, it's bold, it's tasteful, it looks a bit like that one butterfly pokemon--- 9/10! I can dig it!

-summer: his jersey doesn't look like it fits him, but other than that the outfit is alright-- nothing crazy good-- 7/10

-rpg: Oh man, this looks kinda weird--- I don't hate it, but that helmet looks more fish like than bat like-- still some decent effort here-- 7/10

-kimono: again this isn't really a kimono but-- eh, it's a decent outfit-- and it fits him well-- 7/10

54/70

SPOILERS AHEAD FOR THE NEW GUY!!!!!!!!

Xianyun;

-base outfit: So generally speaking I REALLY like his design, HOWEVER--- idk what it is about this guy, but he looks like he's drawn in a completely different style from the rest of the boys, ESPECIALLY the last few, and it's really messing with me-- there's about two sprites/faces he makes that feel stylistically correct for the rest of the game but other than that... BUT THAT GRIEVANCE ASIDE-- I actually really like this design! The hair, the whites with the accents of red and black-- it's really solid, very elegant, really cohesive-- 10/10

-halloween costume: I mean, it's just a jumping ghost-- there's nothing bad about it, but there's nothing super remarkable either-- 7/10

-butler: Eh-- I kinda wish there was more to him-- it's not bad but it's a little boring in places-- also that wing pattern running up his leg-- I really wish they put that on the ends of his coat tails-- eh, 7/10

-masquerade: so this one I think I would like tweaks to the colors-- I would've liked it more if the vest where a deep red and the shirt underneath was either white or black to match his pants-- OR, white vest OR white and red vest-- then black shirt to match the pants-- I like this design I just think the colors are a little boring on him-- also I want more pop to that cape-- still pretty good though 7/10

-summer: Oh I LOVE the vibe here. The delicate little rich bookish indoor boy goes to the beach but doesn't know how to beach and he's having fun in his tight soaked day clothes-- he's 1000% the kind of priss diva that will wear a light breathable button down to the beach no matter what-- he has to protect his skin--- 10/10, I love this for him

-rpg: I think I would've liked this better if he had some kind of shirt-- he really doesn't seem the type to just go around shirtless for several reason-- that being said the colors and concept are nice sooo 7/10

-kimono: Okay now THIS is nice-- it's very ostentatious which feels appropriate for him-- I do think that black pulls a little bit too brown and I don't love that, but aside from that I like it-- falls a little awkward on him though, but that's not a design thing-- 8/10

56/70

[mystxmomo]

hi hiii

so. what if. iiii. enabled u to be autistic on the internet again :3c

i wanna hear your thoughts on eilistraee and vhaerauns relationship! the nitty gritty, the dynamics, how they think of each other vs how they act, and how thats changed over time+how its reflected in their church

im ADORING all your posts on it if i could id print them out and eat them 🫶

Okay. So this is officially the third part of my "I need to go crazy on some character analysis" Saga. My analysis on Vhaeraun is Here, and my analysis on Eilistraee is Here. I recommend, if you're stumbling across this post in the wild as tumblr tends to do, reading those two first so that you have an idea of how I see these two characters and where the basis of my argument for their characterization comes from. If I need to reference something from either post, I'll quote it here. But y'know. Need be said.

Okay so.

I believe this post is going to the most subjective of mine. I am going to try and pull up canon screenshots from War of the Spider Queen, The Lady Penitent, and Evermeet, but unlike how you kind of get told directly how the drow gods behave and hold themselves and a lot of things end up getting built on them, I would argue so many hands have touched DnD and so many interpretations of their relationship have sprung up over the books that it's hard to give a truly simplified "This is how they see one another."

Water is wet statement, relationships are complicated.

Anyway. Given what my thesis is, I am going to be talking a fair bit about abusive family dynamics in this one as well. My goal for this (and any character relationship I do, really) if to try and keep it very fair. I think a of people make the mistake when talking about Eilistraee and Vhaeraun's relationship of picking a side. Like this idea of one of them being right and one of them being wrong and needing to "Fix" the other. And I don't think that's true at all. I think to be able to understand why they feel the way they do about one another and why their relationship is the way it is, you need to respect both of their characters individually.

(Granted, I think this should be true of any relationship you're writing for in fiction. If I can preach for a second, I think even if you don't like a character, you have to be able to respect the character to properly portray them.)

Final note before I get into this. Everyone thank @abracadav-r again for being on screenshot duty. The posts wouldn't get done nearly as fast without them, they know exactly where to find these little moments.

So. That all said. Lets get into it.

I've made a smaller joke post about what I think their dynamic is like before here. But now that you're giving me the opportunity to do so, I will go indepth about it. Yes.

I'm kinda of the opinion that Eilistraee is more incorrect about Vhaeraun than Vhaeraun is incorrect about Eilistraee (But also that this is the result of DND Canon not being entirely fair to Vhaeraun.)

Let's get the discussion about my thesis about the Elven Pantheon being an analogy for an Abusive family on a divine scale out of the way first, because it's something I've mentioned a few time's, but only every really shorthanded. And I think here, in the discussion about relations, is a GREAT place to start and actually explore that.

Now. I should probably start by saying, I don't think this was intended by DnD. Like, I think when they were originally making this lore, it was the intention to just make a justifiable evil worth killing. DND came out of a time of the romantic fantasy, the very Tolkien and Fairytale esc ideas of good and evil and have this classic hero's journey power fantasy ideal to it. Other people have gone into depth about that origin with far better sourcing and dissection than I can ever hope to, but basically: DnD is absolutely (as all art is) a product of it's time and of the community it stemmed from.

However, I personally think those themes and ideas are a little outdated, and a modern audience (myself being the modern audience) tends to be more enthralled by very nuanced interpretations of good and evil, and find indepth character driven narratives more engaging. And I think that for what this mythos has become over the course of it's 60+ years of evolution, you can reinterpret the narrative to be a fascinating depiction of a mythos that echo's the abusive family structure.

Copying and Pasting from my Eilistraee Essay:

It is of my opinion that, when you look at the Eilistrae-Vhaeraun Dynamic and how they were treated by Lolth and Corellon, you're looking at a classic Golden Child/Scrape Goat dynamic. This is important to mention here because I do think that's important context within how Eilistraee (the person) see's and understands the world, and where her mind is at when it comes to the perception of her sense of self. To VASTLY oversimplify about how emotionally abusive family structures work by a lot, when you look at emotionally abusive families with siblings, you tend to find a pattern where one child ends up getting the bulk of the favoritism and affection (The golden child), while the other takes the bulk of the abuse and tends to take a of blame and is seen as being deserving of the abuse (The scrapegoat.) I'll get a little bit more into the specifics of what that means for their relationship in a later post.[*] Now. Calling her the Golden Child, but I don't think being the Golden Child is strictly a good thing. In a lot of ways, I think a lot of golden children end up very emotionally stilted, and I think you kind of see that in Eilistraee. She HAS to be the perfect one. And she's had this expectation to be The Good One placed on her shoulders since she was young. Golden Children are often blinded to the abuse their siblings face because they themselves are not subjected to the same kind of abuse.

[*] And well. It's that later post!

In emotionally abusive families, siblings tend to be pitted against eachother, either unintentionally as a result of the Golden Child being the subject of a parents time, attention, resources, and affection, or as a purposeful attempt on the part of a parent to put divides in a family. In the real life world, it is more often the first. I think a lot of people think Abusers are more like Lolth where there's an intentional "I looked at you and from the day you were born decided to make your life hell."

But I would argue the tricky thing about abusive family structures (Especially with parent-child situations), is that more often then not, the abusers love the idea of the person they're abusing. To them, what they're doing is love. It is very rare that an abuser is this knowing evil schemer that actively sits and thinks to themself that "That's my least favorite child, they don't deserve my attention."

(Though, as a small side tangent not immediately related to the fictional character, you might see this logic manifest more in the way finances are weaponized in abuse, especially see in America where college is more expensive and therefore often used as a control tactic. IE; My wonderful son wants to go into STEM, why would I waste money by giving it to my son who wants to do art college. Because people get comically evil about money.)

Instead, emotional abuse is often more insidious. It's... I'm going to put the blame on everything that goes wrong on my son (Who I left in the hands of his physically abusive mother to have his arm constantly bent behind his back by her) I can't bring myself to believe that my daughter would ever want to scheme against me. YOU could have been good once, but you're evil because you're not happy, you're too moody, you're too violent. I'm not even going to give you the chance or the environment to grow, because it's just in your nature to be evil, and because you are evil because you were born evil that all that goes wrong is your fault.

You know. That kind of logic.

So. Eilistraee was Corellon's Golden Child. She was the free spirited happy one. She was the one that loved to hunt and dance. She was the good one.

(But often, when a scrape goat leaves the family, the golden child becomes the new target.

Y'know. Like..

Corellon gave up on the idea of trying to turn his son Vhaeraun to abandon his ways. He vowed to kill Vhaeraun if he ever tried to hurt his sister. Nevertheless, the Masked Lord did threaten the Dark Maiden's life, without known action against him on Corellon's part.

Corellon's servant Solars claimed that, with this act, Eilistraee had exhausted her purpose, because the willing had been saved, and the unwilling cast down as a necessary sacrifice.

The in-story context for this being honestly worse and kind of containing bad racial implications:

“Her soul was destroyed,” Felarathael said solemnly. “But before she died, she saved many. She cleansed the taint from hundreds of drow who might otherwise have been condemned.” “But the rest!” Lashrael wailed. “Thousands! Hundreds of thousands! No hope of redemption for them, with Eilistraee gone. Condemned to darkness and despair, forevermore!” “Another necessary sacrifice,” Felarathael said without a trace of emotion. “Else the game would have been lost.”

This, to me, is the framework of Vhaeraun and Eilistraee's relationship.

Likewise, the Masked Lord nurtures an abiding hatred of Eilistraee. The Dark Maiden always held Corellon's favor more than her hateful brother, and she thwarted Vhaeraun's early efforts to bring all the Ilythiiri (southern, dark-skinned elves) under his sway, enabling Lolth and Ghaunadaur to make great inroads among those who would become the drow.

I'm under the impression that Eilistraee doesn't know Vhaeraun. She has this idea of who he is in her head seemingly both based on the what their father thought of him, and as a result of being an outsider looking at the things he did at the hand of his mother. (And again, let's be clear and establish in this post. That wasn't WHOLLY Lolth. Vhaeraun did play his part. But I don't think Eilistraee see's that, I think she strictly see's an eager climb for power) And then she makes a lot of assumptions about his motivations based on the idea of him she's made in her head that reaffirm that idea.

On the other hand, I think Vhaeraun understands exactly the kind of person his sister is, because it's really not that hard to understand who Eilistraee is. She really does just mean well. While I consider her to be a lot more guarded and lonely then people tend to give her credit for, I don't think she's being insincere with her wants and wishes and you don't have to doubt what her intentions are. Instead, the ways that I think Vhaeraun is often wrong about how well she can handle herself and how strong her allies are by 4e, and what that could mean for drow as a whole. Because he's so willing to discredit her as a threat, he doesn't pay attention to her, and because he doesn't pay attention to her I don't think he realized she'd gotten friendly to people like... Mysta the goddess of magic.

And being realistic, even if he had known, I don't think he understands the weight of her being friendly TO people like Mystra because he himself only ever makes allies, not friends amongst gods.

Now. The reason I capped that whole screenshot above is actually because it contains a very interesting bit of framework that I think proves this. Even back in the 2e source books, the phrasing of these things matters. If it was a matter of Vhaeraun thinking that something was the case, they would have mentioned it. However, the specific way that it's set up in that passage is: "It's not that Vhaeraun thinks Eilistraee's involvement in circumventing his climb to power allowed Lolth and Ghaunadaur to gain power. Her involvement DID allow Lolth and Ghaunadaur to gain power."

And I don't think she's aware of that. But Vhaeraun is.

To further this, we're to copy/paste a passage from Sacrifice of the Widow. Now. This is from the perspective of a Vhaeraun worshiper, and it holds as much bias as Eilistraee's priestesses have towards him. But. Because it correlates with metatextual information we have from all the way back in 1998, I'm inclined to say it's not a full dishonesty, just a biased truth.

The dance might have been beautiful, had it not been a violation of the sacred order. Had Eilistraee not interfered, Vhaeraun might have united all of the darkelves under a single deity millennia ago, but Eilistraee had proved as greedy as Lolth and had stolen the females away from the Masked Lord’s worship. She’d taught them to exclude males from her circle, to subjugate and revile them instead. Vhaeraun’s followers had learned a bitter lesson. Females could not be trusted.

Compare this to how Eilistraee speaks of Vhaeraun's influence in Evermeet: Island of the Elves.

Like... Eilistaee. There are bigger threats out there than your brother But. She's so blinded by her history with him that she can only ever see her brothers influence is a bloodstain on the land.

As I mentioned in my other post, I think Eilistraee is a biased narrator in this scene. I don't think Vhaeraun wants his sister to die for the crime of existing. I think his feelings on his sister are way more complicated than his feelings on either of his parents. And we know when Vhaeraun explicitly wants someone dead, because the text would have told us that.

...

So, to understand Vhaeraun and Eilistraee's relationship, I do think we need to talk about The Masked Lady.

Given how much of DnD is oral tradition and people building on concepts that the games give to us, I think people feel more comfortable engaging with some of these things through the wiki and building off of the idea of the ideas they get from the wiki without searching out the original source. And to be clear, this isn't like, judgement for doing that. Nevermind that the IP is older than I am twice over, that a lot of old blog posts are only acceptable through niche internet archive links, and that a lot the source books are neither applicable to 5e or still within print. I'M personally guilty of doing it all of the time.

Instead, the point I'm making is because of how the realms is set up and how people engage with DND, not a lot of people know when plot point comes from a source book, a blog post, a prose book, an official magazine, when something was fan-submitted and made canon, or Ed Greens personal twitter/discord. They all kind of merge together to create a collective canon. I think, as a result, a lot of people end up engaging with these concepts with the same amount of abstraction. But the thing about The Masked Lady is that they're like. A book character. This isn't just a concept that was placed out into world abstractly, they're a fully fleshed out character within The Lady Penitent.

This is important to us and our purposes of engaging with these characters on a more transformative level rather than at a dnd table. Being a character, we can look at how they behave and what the actual intent of their portrayal was. And I want to show you a few things, because I have an argument I would like to make given that portrayal.

==

A voice called to them: a voice that was neither male nor female, but both. A moment later, it became a pool of utter silence. Then song, then silence. Opposites, twined together, yet somehow harmonious. Side by side, the awarenesses that were Kâras and Valdar drifted to the place where the song-silence was coming from. It caught them like leaves and swirled them up toward itself. They drifted in front of an enormous face. Moonlight bathed the face’s upper half in shining radiance; the lower half was shadowed in utter blackness. A glint of blue danced across eyes the color of moonstones. Masked Lord, Kâras asked. Is it you? A feminine laugh rustled the mask. Masked … Lady? he ventured. The chuckle deepened, became male. Hands moved to the blackness that was the deity’s mask. Fingers gripped its edges. Kâras tensed, and felt the eager anticipation of the awareness that was Valdar. The mask lifted. Kâras wept. So did Valdar—and as he did, Kâras saw into the other Nightshadow’s heart. The emotions that had prompted their tears were as different as moonlight from shadow.

==

“Masked Lord,” Kâras prayed. “Is it your will the breach be opened? Have you—” He hesitated, then forced himself to say it. “Have you allied yourself with the Ancient One?” This time, the god answered. Not in words, but in the distant peal of a hunting horn. That alone wouldn’t have convinced Kâras; it might have been one of the priestesses, signaling the others. But as the horn sounded, a rectangle of darkness with two eyeholes appeared in the air a short distance away, within the tunnel leading to the ruined temple. The bottom of this “mask” fluttered, as if the mouth behind it were lending its breath to the hunting horn’s peal. Dots of angry red blazed where the eyes would have been. That decided it. Kâras wouldn’t run. He’d fight.

==

===

My argument about The Masked Lady is this: Despite taking a lot of Eilistraee's visage and Churches Iconograpy, When you look at how The Masked Lady behaves in practice I would argue that this isn't actually strictly Eilistraee. The Masked Lady feels like a new character that is both Vhaeraun and Eilistraee..... but also Neither Vhaeraun and Eilistraee. In that strictly esoteric kind of way, by merging their aspects together they've created a new god made of their parts.

And on one hand, you can read some of this as Eilistraee Masquerading as her brother to try and get his church to work with hers, but on an authorial level? I don't know if that was the intent. For one, I don't actually think Eilistraee is good at being manipulative, she's too well intentioned. She'd have fallen apart under the weight of that lie.

Granted, I do think with both of them being in there Eilistraee is more "in control." Vhaeraun is absolutely ""Dead"" in at least some ways. The piece he puts down representing himself is destroyed in the Sava game, Eilistraee ends up with his mask, and Lolth is able to show off his corpse in the astral plane.

But even all of that aside, I'm tapping in both Ed Greenwood's thoughts for this and something from Faiths & Avatars.

(I'm going to copy this summary from the FR wiki page on dead powers because, as always, it's quite good at summarization. But as always, I've double checked Faiths & Avatars to be sure)

Sometimes, the memory and personality of a deity was separated from their power and true form at the moment of their death, typically by the interaction of the magical turbulence of their death with the magic of a powerful relic or artifact into the same area. In such cases, the deity remained awake but imprisoned, in a sense, though vastly uncomfortable with their much-reduced state.

As such, I think during The Masked Lady era, three things were true simultaneously.

There was a part of Vhaeraun that was dead. That's the part of him on the astral plane. And even that part of him seemed to hold mild consciousness. But I also think a part of him was trapped by Mystra in a dream, and another part of him existed simultaneously within his sister creating a new entity as The Masked Lady, in the same way that Eilistraee seemed to both exist as herself AND The Masked Lady separate from herself as she's playing the Sava game. Because these are gods. Their existence does not exist in singularity.

But. Why does this matter to Vhaeraun and Eilistraee's relationship. Why do I think this is an important talking point for them.

Because I think the fact that they exist together implies a level of respect and understanding towards one another. This is not how this would have happened if they truly hated one another. What happened with Vhaeraun and Eilistraee seems closer to what happened with Zandilar the Dancer and Bast (Absorbed and became Sharess) or (Sehanine Moonbow, Aerdrie Faenya, and Hanali Celanil) > (Came together to become Angharradh and notedly, can separate to spent time apart as times have changed.)

This feels like. Notedly different, compared to what happened with (for example) Ulutiu and Auril, where he got entirely subsumed by her.

For a moment, they were one god. And they could have only synergized as one if they understood eachothers intentions well enough to agree to be one.

==

It's worth noting before I get into this section. Both the idea that Vhaeraun didn't actually die and was put in ⋆ ˚｡⋆⊹❇Mystra's Dream Prison <3 ❇⊹⋆ ˚｡⋆ and that upon returning to life he started working with Eilistraee are not actually ""canon"" to 5e. They are, like many things, Ed Green-ism's that a lot of people (myself included, because I do actually think he's an incredibly creative person with good character building ideas) take as canon. Despite taking it as canon, I think it's worth mentioning that there is no official source material to pull from for these ideas, because unlike the masked lady, these two ideas exist as concepts to be built off of rather than media to be examined.

We can only logic and reason what happened between them and how it's changed their relationship using everything else we have.

Posted from the FR wiki:

"The Grand History of the Realms explicitly says that Vhaeraun's assassination attempt failed and Eilistraee killed him. However, Ed Greenwood suggests that Eilistraee didn't actually kill her brother. The Dark Maiden defeated Vhaeraun with the indirect help of her ally Mystra, as the Weave frustrated the Masked Lord's magic while enhancing Eilistraee's. The goddess temporarily took her brother's portfolio, and trapped his sentience in the Weave, where it was enfolded in a dream by Mystra. The Lady of Mysteries did this to ensure that the two drow siblings would survive the cataclysm that she knew was coming—the Spellplague—in which she would be "killed" to renew the Weave and magic would go wild. After Mystra and the Weave were completely restored in 1487 DR, the goddess of magic could finally give Eilistraee her own lost power and do the same with Vhaeraun, after having awakened him from his dream."

It was one of Ed Greenwood's ideas to have the two deities reach a reciprocal understanding, and to make the personal enmity between them was no more. More to read here

So here's my take on this situation.

I think a lot of people like to paint the "Mystra and Eilistraee put Vhaeraun in Dream Prison" Situation in a very limited light. In the same way Eilistraee tends to get romanticized as a wholly good and Vhaeraun demonized as a firm evil, it tends to get boiled down to the idea that Mystra and Eilistraee managed to convince him to be "Less Evil."

But, I don't know. To accept the Mystra/Eilistraee tag team as something wholly good, you have to also accept the sentiment of Vhaeraun as someone who is evil and needed "fixed," and I don't think that's ever been the case. As I think my multitude of arguments have implied, I have never been under the impression he's an actual evil.

As such, it's always felt little bitter-sweet to me. I think it's more impactful if they just managed to rub off on eachother due to their time spent together as one. I think it was especially a turning point for Eilistraee, given how many changes came to the structure of her church as a result of that merger. She understands why he uses the tactics he does, she understands that what he's doing is coming from a place of (what I would argue) is sincere love for the drow as a whole, and I think she got a little bit more of a nuanced understanding of the uhh Sexism. I also like to think she understood his experiences more, and that his love doesn't come through the same lens as hers.

Likewise, I think Vhaeraun came out of that understanding that he was stretching himself thin. I think that he learned that he NEEDS to be able to rely on others, he NEEDS to start trusting the outside world more. While he's more accepting of drow as they are now, I think his goal has always been to put them back in power to the extent that they were when he had worship from the Ilythiiri. But, thats not the world they live in anymore. Even if he did pull all the drow from the underdark, they could not and would not manage to be that. I think he comes out of The Masked Lady era understanding that to get the drow away from his mother and to coexist is stability in itself. They don't need to rule to be powerful, they just need to coexist.

You know. It's choosing to forgive. We can't change what we were, but we can start this relationship over and grow something new from it. And sometimes, that might be enough.

....

And ALSO I think they had to start getting along, because it really didn't take their churches THAT long to start meshing together when they fused as the masked lady.

At the word “died,” the priestess glanced down at the male. The cleric didn’t look good; his eyes had fully rolled back in his head and his skin was turning gray. Halisstra reached out and lifted the priestess’s chin, forcing her to look away. “It’s only a weak venom,” she lied. “You have plenty of time to heal him. Plenty of time, still.” “Yes,” the priestess repeated softly. “Plenty of time.” Her eyes reminded Halisstra of another priestess who’d succumbed to Halisstra’s bae’qeshel magic, years ago. Seyll had stared just as trustingly into Halisstra’s eyes a heartbeat before Halisstra plunged a sword into her. And yet Seyll had told Halisstra, as she lay dying, that no one was beyond redemption—not even Halisstra. She’d been wrong. This priestess had a wide mouth and creases at the sides of her eyes that could only have come from frequent laughter. The frown of confusion looked out of place on her forehead. The slight bulge of her stomach hinted she might be carrying a child. Halisstra hated her.

Come on guys, The Masked Lady hadn't even existed for half a decade and there was already pregnancies. We don't know what their churches are like 100+ years out. But, for as much as Ed emphasizes the infighting of the churches (And I have no doubt in my heart there ARE factions who refuse to mesh, that's canon to the text) we are inevitably met with 1-2 generations where the combined churches are all that they knew. Vhaeraun and Eilistraee had to work together, because I think as much as they're their own people with thoughts and opinions and experiences, they are also a reflection of their worshipers.

==

I think, to summarize what I think Vhaeraun and Eilistraee's relationship is like in a few paragraphs

With the way their relationships are described, I think Eilistraee was the golden child and Vhaeraun was the scrapegoat in the earlier parts of their childhood. They become reflections of the parent that favors them, because those were the parents that acted as their main influence. Eilistraee saw Vhaeraun as a reflection of her mothers evil, and Vhaeraun saw Eilistraee as undeserving of the favoritism their father gave her.

This view of eachother was cemented when she followed him to Toril. She saw him and his power as an evil and bloodstain, unhelped when he exiled her (probably out of spite and due to the grudge he had as a result of the earlier years). As such, she worked to undermine the influence he had. And when that allowed their mother and Ghaunadaur to take hold, it was the same kind of evil to her.

Her enabling them to take that power worsened the grudge Vhaeraun had of her, because he knows he isn't the same kind of evil as Lolth or Ghaunadaur, and them having that power worsened things for everyone.

This grudge between them kept itself in the legacy of their churches, all the way until The Masked Lady Era. The Masked Lady era was one where they actually managed to come together for a similar goal. It was the first time they were truly about to understand eachothers motivations, experiences, and perspectives, and the first time that divide between them and their communities truly lessened.

And when they finally came out...? I mean. That's going to change anyone. I think not only their relationship changed, but they sort of managed to change eachother a little.

I don't know. I think their relationship is complicated and messy and such a product of their parents influence on them. There is no forgiving Lolth, and there really shouldn't be forgiving Corellon (though, dnd might disagree with me on that.) But I think theirs one that could eventually heal. Out of all of the relationships in the Dark Seladrine, theirs feels the closest to being one that can be refounded on equal ground and with respect towards one another, especially as drow return to the surface and find more acceptance (even outside of their communities.) Because they are to me, two sides of the same coin.

[roryknightwrites]

Aventurine Is BPD Coded- Some Thoughts

Ahhh welcome back everybody to another installment of 'Rory writes a ridiculously long essay nobody asked for to shine light on characters who exhibit symptoms of borderline personality disorder so that we can learn to recognize symptoms portrayed in media that aren't just 'crazy manipulative abusive ex' and start to treat the disorder with a shred of compassion' !!

A good chunk of you follow me because of my essay I wrote on Reo Mikage from Blue Lock, my beautiful borderline princess, and I am PLEASED to announce that my essay is now the first result when you search 'Reo Mikage BPD' on Google, AND he has since been added to the BPD character database !! Saving the world one baddie at a time, no need to thank me B)

Today, I want to write something out that I've been dying to share. I think Aventurine can be read as a BPD coded character, and I think he would be able to cop a diagnosis should he go see a therapist (which we all know he CLEARLY has not done). I've been puttering around posting this because I've been spending so long on a full, all encompassing analysis of this sick blonde man, but I want to take a quick break and kick my feet over BPD Aventurine, so I invite you to come kick your feet with me!

Some context before I start:

1.) Borderline representation is extremely important to me. I've got the BPD / CPTSD combo meal, so I'm having TWICE the fun !! But seriously though, it's not easy being viewed as crazy and 'bad' all the time. Trauma disorders are rough enough as it is just to live with / overcome, but it's worse when there are books, forums, blogs, shows, ect. dedicated to hating you and talking about how evil you are. So, I get really excited when I spy BPD-coded characters (especially if they're likable people and not just ghoulish irredeemable villains or manic pixie dream girl characters). Fans, characters, and even Aventurine himself refer to him as 'crazy' 'insane' 'unstable' which only further rang my BPD bells because he's not crazy; he's just traumatized!

2.) I’m not a psych, so I obviously can’t diagnose real people, and don’t use any of this to diagnose yourself (I don't need the scandal!) I do, however, have a masters degree in English and structured the basis of my education and published my thesis on mental health, cluster B personality disorders specifically, so I read and research a LOT. I’m confident enough in my knowledge to diagnose anime characters (lol).

3.) If you're somebody who has a weird hangup about borderlines, feel free to either not read this, or do read it and soak up some useful information! Regardless, I know Aventurine fans can have some really wild takes (/neg) , so believe what you want at the end of the day! This is just my interpretation of what's festering in that sad brain of his. You can disagree all you want to, but what we're not going to do is spread hateful stereotypes or perpetuate negative stigmas about BPD! That's cornball behavior and I will call you out for it ^-^

CW for discussion of death, suicide, self injury, and identity disturbances

Anyways, if you ask me, Aventurine is BPD coded and I'd like to explain why <3 So, buckle up! This will be another long one.

First, let me define BPD: it's a personality disorder characterized by a long-standing pattern of instability in mood, interpersonal relationships, and self-image. Though it's coined as a 'personality disorder', I urge you to look at it as a trauma disorder. People most often develop it when they are repeatedly traumatized during their formative years. It actually overlaps a TON with complex post traumatic stress disorder, which is why a lot of us baddies end up with both! (On that note, you could definitely view Aventurine as CPTSD-coded as well! I'm a stinky kinnie so I'll just say he's both <3) I won't preach too much on why it's so necessary to treat borderline as a traumatic stress disorder (since hopefully I'll be focusing my own personal academic research on that and I could yap for HOURS about it lol).

But when we look at BPD properly, it's evident that the basis of this disorder is that these people didn't have the opportunity to learn and foster proper emotional reactions. Because of the recurring traumatic events, sections of borderline's brains are underdeveloped as a result. They have a smaller amygdala and they have reduced volume in the prefrontal cortex, as well as other differences in brain development. I've heard it described as 'you were forced to learn some behaviors that helped you survive at one point in your life (for example, maybe fervent efforts to avoid abandonment, unstable emotional reactions, self harming tendencies, lying, mirroring, etc.,) but now you need to unlearn them, because they’re no longer helping you.'  They're trauma responses.

Aventurine shows us a perfect example of the kind of shit that would make someone develop BPD: dude grew up in extreme poverty, was constantly told he was special and he was supposed to bring good luck, watched his entire family and race die in front of him when he was literally still just a kid, was kidnapped and sold into slavery, was forced to murder roughly 34 people while everybody watched him like it was a game, probably went through several other fucked up things while he was enslaved, and then killed his slave owner and was promptly sentenced to death for it. That's...a whole lot of ridiculous trauma that would severely impact somebody's ability to mentally grow and develop correctly. The bulk of his childhood/adolescence was spent with no safety, no security, overwhelming guilt, constant fight or flight reactions, learning how to take on other personas to avoid violence or mistreatment – you get the point. He did not have a normal life and it is absolutely probable that he would develop a trauma disorder from the shit he's been through.

So then, what behaviors/signs does somebody need to exhibit to receive a Borderline diagnosis? The 9 diagnostic criteria for BPD are as follows:

1. Fear of abandonment

2. Unstable or changing relationships

3. Unstable self-image; struggles with identity or sense of self

4. Impulsive or self-damaging behaviors

5. Suicidal behavior or self-injury

6. Varied or random mood swings

7. Constant feelings of worthlessness or sadness

8. Problems with anger, including frequent loss of temper or physical fights

9. Stress-related paranoia or loss of contact with reality

As with my last post, I'm going to organize this based on the 5 immediate traits I think Aventurine exhibits most (you only need 5 out of 9 to receive a diagnosis, so let me cut to the chase and stop wasting your time w my yapping).

Fear of Abandonment:

Aventurine has a habit of wanting relationships and then pushing them away once they get too close. He also clearly has trauma associated with losing people prematurely.

First of all, let's look at Aventurine's tendency to view relationships as transactional. With the expectation that a friendship, partnership – whatever –  is mutually beneficial, that generally implies both parties will leave satisfied once the 'transaction' is complete. That’s his parting line in the game, actually! “Satisfied with our transaction, I trust?” 

That being said, he's already prepared for people to leave when they're done getting what they want from him. In one trailer (and the game) he refers to himself as "another cog in the machine known as the strategic investment department" and then says, "Your humble servant aventurine at your disposal [...] I can also play the role of ‘friend’ – if needed; Go ahead, use me as you wish, even stab me in the back if you see fit."

This is a very strange thing to say upon first meeting someone LMAO. He's speaking of himself like he's an object, rather than a person. Before the other party even says anything, he's basically saying 'hey btw if you end up disappointing me in some way, i'm already prepared for it!' Establishing relationships with the assumption that the other person will betray you/abandon you/hurt you in some way? Borderline behavior. God forbid somebody does try to break down one of these walls, we'll see Aventurine's second habit to avoid abandonment: pushing people away.

Something people don't necessarily consider is that ‘efforts to avoid abandonment’ doesn't always mean the person is on their knees begging you to not to leave them. It can manifest as someone being very flighty and purposefully cutting ties randomly/pushing people away from them so that nobody is able to abandon them. If you leave first, they can’t leave you, right? This is a very common behavior for borderlines to avoid the pain that comes with being abandoned.

The most notable moment of this, in my opinion, is when Aventurine tries to gaslight himself into thinking that Ratio really did stab him in the back during their ploy against Sunday. As we know, their fighting, bickering, and Ratio's 'betrayal' were all part of Aventurine's plan. When they leave Sunday's office, Ratio immediately asks if he's okay and if he needs help, and Aventurine is very dismissive/a little rude in his response. Ratio is confused because Aventurine is talking as if he wasn't the one who MADE this plan and TOLD Ratio what to do:

Aventurine is basically saying, "Hey babe this is not in the script we talked about! Let's stay on track, remember? You hate me, you betrayed me, and now you're leaving me!" And Ratio is like "Yeah okay but are you good? Because you don't seem good,” but Aventurine's heels are so far in the dirt at this point that he is NOT budging at all. When he's in the Trauma Maze, Future Aventurine grills him on this moment:

I get why this part confused some people; why would Aventurine think this when the plan was his idea in the first place? Because, he subconsciously doesn't want to get too attached to the idea that Ratio might ACTUALLY care about him or want to help him. He's forcing himself to think "no, that's not what he was doing, he was planning on actually ratting me out all along, he was only asking about my wellbeing to get in my head."

However, I think it's evident that Aventurine wants relationships/attention just as much as everybody else does, he just won't let himself have it. To further this idea, I think the lyrics to White Night (the Penacony trailer theme song) are worth looking at (these specifically):

I don't wanna be alone tonightOh, lead me with your altered signThere's no one else left for me to loseHeadin' to the other side, other side

I don't wanna be alone tonightI'll bring you to my best disguise'Cause you don't need, don't need to know the truthLet me rave forever in your life

The song is obviously about Aventurine when you look at the lyrics, but these lines in particular just further my point that this man does NOT like the fact that he's alone. He wants relationships, he wants closeness, but he rejects it at the same time out of fear that he might lose somebody prematurely again and doesn't want to experience being abandoned or being rejected for his personality (his real one or his fake one), which leads me to...

Unstable Self-Image; Struggles With Identity or Sense of Self:

The shift from Kakavasha to Aventurine screwed this guy up REAL bad. A MASSIVE part of Aventurine's character, in my opinion, is his struggle with his identity/sense of self. I mean, he literally had to kill off who he used to be in order to live how he's living now, and he didn't have much of a choice in the matter. Jade sums it up pretty well when Aventurine is sat before her on trial: 

Aventurine joining the IPC comes with the price of...well, becoming 'Aventurine'. Since I'm clocking him with a BPD diagnosis, the identity disturbance would have probably happened before this moment, and I think it did. I'll bet it started festering after that first massive traumatic event where he watched his family die and tried to rationalize how that was possible with his 'good luck' (since that was really the only consistent idea he had about himself), and it probably only got worse when he became fixated on the fact that whoever tf he is, he's only worth 60 copper coins (did the math – that's about $3). That's gotta cause some massive identity issues. He's coined as this ‘good luck charm’, this ‘blessed child’, a ‘beacon of hope for the Avgins’, and somehow, he ended up in the absolute worst situation possible while simultaneously dooming all of the Avgins (obviously not his fault, but he thinks it's his fault).

When Jade tells him to pick a new identity, ironically he picks one that is everything he probably grew to hate after his childhood/adolescence.

Associating with the wealthy? The rich were the people who paid to brand him and enslave him. The IPC? Promised to help the Avgins but disappeared when the Katicans invaded, then came back and kidnapped him to sell him as a slave. Now he's both wealthy and a part of the IPC, and you have to wonder how he truly feels about it. We'll look into that more later. Regardless, he's not really 'free' now, even if he isn't technically owned by a master anymore. He's chained to the IPC because this is life now; this is his identity. Where else would he even go? What else would he do? (Die, perhaps?) It's not like he can go home, or go live a peaceful life out on the countryside somewhere. He made 'Aventurine' his entire life and his entire personality. On that note, I really like this quote from his third character story:

“The aventurine, that symbol of power and of the future, is about to be officially handed to him — Yet it would have no more allure or value in his eyes as soon he obtains it, even though he had sought it by putting his life on the line.

He returns to his office in a daze. The aventurine stone emits a peculiar glow on his desk, seemingly congratulating and mocking him at the same time."Was luck truly on your side when you wrestled with fate?"”

Did he really luck out with this one? Comparatively, of course, this is better than his life as a slave, but he essentially just traded his rusted chains for golden ones. Becoming Aventurine might wind up bringing him a lot more pain than it was worth. 

Also, the outfit he chose? Covered in gold, fur, and jewels, all materials that somebody who knows nothing about being rich would assume rich people wear in excess. It's evident in his tacky taste (sorry honey I love you so much but the hat is just crazy work you look like a pimp) that he doesn't know anything about how to dress himself. And I bully him for being tacky but it makes sense! He dresses exactly how you'd think an out-of-touch billionaire would dress. Back to his sense of identity: it's very important to establish that Aventurine feels guilty about taking on this persona! That's all 'Aventurine' is: a persona. If he were to die tomorrow, the IPC would dust off that stone and give it to another bozo who would end up being the next 'Aventurine'.

While he didn't initially develop this personality subconsciously and it was a 'choice' to start playing this role (not that he had a plethora of alternative options), the perpetuation is damaging him mentally. He does a good job of keeping up the act, obviously. This theme that his entire personality is just one big act is overarching through the entire Penacony quest, but there's one moment in particular I really liked: when Sparkle is being a jerk and he has this offhand comment about how he's so frivolous, vain, and flashy, and how he'd hate to live anywhere where it rained since his outfit is too expensive to get wet.

Then, we have this interaction in the maze: Future Aventurine brings up the memory of him and his big sister playing dead, floating in bloody water to avoid being killed by the Katicans when they attacked. He mentions that it was his father's shirt, the last one his father left behind before dying, and that it was ruined. Aventurine says it wasn't ruined, and he's always kept it. (I wonder if that's the shirt he wore during his time enslaved?) Future Aventurine grills him and asks ‘why keep it? This new person that you are would never wear something so dirty and old. 'Aventurine' wouldn't want that old rag, it's not worth any money. 'Aventurine' would never splash around in murky water like that; he wouldn't need to.’ Nobody is hunting him, now he's the hunter. Future Aventurine makes the snide comment that he bets Aventurine wouldn't even dare to go outside in the rain, let alone do any of the things Kakavasha had to do, since he's so much more elite now. Aventurine, clearly hurt by the implication, says that even after all this time, he's never changed.

Of course, he hasn't. Deep down, no matter how much he tries to trick himself and everybody around him, he's still the same scared, traumatized boy he always has been. His future self chastises him for having an inferiority complex and mentions that with every gamble he makes, he has his left hand shaking in fear behind his back.

But the constant pull to push Kakavasha down and keep up this act that 'Aventurine' is the real him obviously perpetuated the identity disturbance in him and made it a hundred times worse, to the point where (as Future Aventurine points out) the hole he's dug is basically impossible to climb out of.

Because of this, I interpret Aventurine to constantly be struggling with his identity, not knowing who really exists under all the masks he wears, not knowing if he or anybody around him will ever figure it out. I imagine he feels very empty and unfulfilled, since as I mentioned in the abandonment section, he doesn't want to be alone. But the higher he climbs on the social ladder, the further he can separate himself from other people. This is a classic issue borderlines face. We masquerade as something we think the people around us will like, someone WE might like, but it always ends up leaving us feeling more empty than before.

(This is just an added bonus to chew on, but I got stuck on this line when I played through Penacony:)

Do you think once he became Aventurine and got the money and the resources, he researched toys that normal kids play with? Fancy ones like building blocks, stuff that he would have never been exposed to as a kid? Obviously baby Kakavasha would not know wtf building toys looked like, and I'm sure teenage Kakavasha didn't have the opportunity to browse toy catalogs. But, he recognizes the toy even though he says he's never played with them before. Maybe he considered buying it but decided against it, since it doesn't fit his new persona. Kakavasha doesn't exist anymore, so there's no reason to nurture that part of him. Anyways, just wanted to hurt y'all a bit more. Speaking of hurting ourselves:

Impulsive or Self-Damaging Behaviors + Suicidal Behavior or Self Injury:

I'm combining these two because my points kept blending together, so bear with me lol.

Aventurine is known for being incredibly reckless and putting himself in the path of danger over and over again. When discussing how he tricked Sunday with the Cornerstones, Future Aventurine asks:

I want to exaggerate how crazy it is (i can say that i'm also a bpd baddie) that he smashed his Cornerstone. I don't think a Stoneheart has ever done that before. Their stone is what makes them a Stoneheart. Ratio mentions that without it, Aventurine would be back to being nobody. Remember: that's what makes him Aventurine. You know, the persona that required him to kill off his former identity? Their Cornerstones are more important than the Stonehearts’ lives, as stated multiple times. But that's just it: Aventurine doesn't GAF about his life. He doesn't mind putting his life on the line to pull off his plan because he has that deep-rooted desire to punish himself for everything he thinks was his fault. He gets called out for gambling with his life multiple times during Penacony, and while most of the time it's reduced to him just being crazy (cough, bpd) or just having a severe gambling problem. Extremely hot take, but I think he gambles literally as another way to hurt himself. I mean, look at what he says when you ask about his hobbies:

"There's no denying it, my fascination is with the game of chance... be it the exhilarating rush of triumph or the extensive emptiness that follows, both are worth savoring, time and time again."

Being impulsive and risky, betting his life over and over –  it makes him feel alive. He knows the end result will hurt, that he'll have to face that 'extensive emptiness' and the extreme guilt he feels regarding his continued good luck, but he does it anyway.

Speaking of betting, his bets are always 'all or nothing', seemingly every time. Future Aventurine calls him out on always risking everything with every gamble, asking:

"Do you truly believe the greater the risk, the greater the reward?"

Or...do you just not care what happens to you? He doesn't need to risk a lot; he's never lost. He could bet the lowest amount and still win every time, and make a lot of money depending on what everybody else bet. In fact, that would actually be a better strategy in gambling (poker/black jack specifically), because it would insinuate that he's not very confident with his hand and prompt the other players to bet higher, assuming that they'll beat him.

I imagine he gets a shred of dopamine betting everything he has knowing that he'll probably win, but hey, who knows? Then after winning and multiplying everything he has, I imagine that 'extensive emptiness' that he refers to is the feeling of 'oh good, more money. More status. More success. A reminder that no matter what I do, I'm stuck here in this role forever.'

For some reason, he also thinks that taking risks makes him appear more confident and secure. He makes a show of always keeping up the big bets and he boasts about how successful he is, while clutching his hand behind his back thinking 'oh god, is this it? will I finally lose this time?' He brings this up when he's speaking with himself and he says, 'How could a weak person take such daring risks?"

Oh, the delicious irony.

That raises the question, though: if he wants to die so badly, why hasn't he yet? It's not like he had an easy life. He fought very hard to stay alive, so why does he act so recklessly now?

I think at his core, he's scared. Dying is scary. His family is there in the afterlife; would they be disappointed in the person he’s become? At the same time, being alive is exhausting. The constant emotional pain this guy probably deals with every day? It's gotta be heavy.

His behaviors around suicide remind of a classic passively suicidal person with BPD: maybe they don't necessarily want to die, but they're tired. They don't have an active plan, but If something is going to kill them, they're not going to move out of the way.

So, carrying out his Penacony plan makes sense. Of course he’s not completely sure what will happen when Acheron kills him, but because he doesn’t have anything to live for, he’s fine gambling with his life. He makes a show of finally throwing out every last chip, too, no longer clutching them under the table in fear. He was fine with smashing the Aventurine stone because it's not like he was planning on using it after his final show; the little bit of power it had left in it was more than enough. (I also think it's worth mentioning how he did fight very hard to be alive, and after fighting SO hard, living through poverty and slavery and literally murdering people just to keep his own life, now he's finally at a point where he can 'relax' and carry out his life in peaceful luxury...but ironically, now he doesnt want to be alive)

That being said, we do have to address this little number:

Aventurine attempted several times in Penacony, he admits it flat out. The writers even went sofar as to bold this line specifically! I think this does also go hand-in-hand with him being passively suicidal, since he's pretty sure he'll live when he attempts in the dream, but he's gonna try it SEVERAL times just to be sure. Mentally healthy people wouldn't try it... once, Aventurine!

As if we needed more evidence that Aventurine constantly puts himself in danger, you know I HAVE to mention...the light cone:

n case you haven't read the description for this light cone, let me share it with you:

"You don't believe me?"He (Aventurine) provocatively looks at the man (Ratio) before him, then draws out a revolver, empties its cylinder, and leaves a single shot in the chamber.

"Seems like I'll need to get you up to speed on how I do things if our cooperation were to remain amicable."He pushes the gun into his opponent's hand, spins the cylinder, and points the barrel to his own chest.

He pulls the trigger repeatedly, and the smile on his face remains the same after three empty clicks."Life is a grand gamble, and I'll always be the final victor."

Now what the HELL is this? Mind you, this is the first time Ratio has met this man!!! Imagine you meet your new mission partner for the first time and he puts a revolver in your hand and fires it thrice, then leaves. WHO does that? (...a baddie, perhaps!)

I don't think it's a secret to anybody who has spent a reasonable amount of time around Aventurine that there's something off about him, and that there's a really deep sadness running through him. There's some instances where other characters mention his passive desire to die – A few quick examples I can think of:

The instance in Story IV with Opal:

"Maybe luck won't be on your side this time, and the bill for all your past good fortune will come due [...] But isn't that what you've been longing for?"

Opal implies Aventurine wants to fail on Penacony, which, as we've discussed, is an accurate assumption. Jade says something similar after Aventurine's stunt: when Topaz says the light in his stone went out, Jade replies by saying "he got what he wanted."

Also, I’d like to point out that Ratio must have been anticipating that Aventurine would do something rash, since he wrote that note (doctor's advice) long before he started grilling him after the meeting with Sunday.

It's also worth noting the nod to T.S Eliot's "The Waste Land" (a very long poem about life and death). You get the achievement Sibyl, What Do You Want? after playing through the past of Kakavasha's life, and once you defeat boss Aventurine, you get the achievement She Replied, I Want to Die. I don't think that one needs an explanation, but boy does it hurt! (There's other, smaller nods to him being suicidal, like the Waiting for Godot achievement – Google the story if you're unfamiliar. Not as relevant, but I must mention it bc it makes my english major brain go brrrrr)

Also, overspending/gambling/being loose with money is a very common vice for borderlines to indulge in and harm themselves with. It's also implied that he drinks a decent amount. I counted 6 bottles of SoulGlad in his hotel room just from the angles I could see, and he's shown to be passed out at the bar when Ratio goes to get him before they go on their little date-I mean, mission. Aventurine says 'he must have drank too much', and whether or not that was true is irrelevant since it was a believable enough claim that Ratio bought it.

Borderlines are (usually) self-destructive in some capacity, and while some very annoying people assume it's for attention, it's so much more common for it to be because our inner emotions are just so out of whack. Sometimes, matching the inner pain with outer pain is a way to cope. They might also do it to try and combat-

Constant Feelings of Worthlessness or Sadness:

Probably the most nagging, prevalent feeling Aventurine deals with is the constant feeling of worthlessness. One thing about this man? He hates himself. Like, really hates himself. Take a look at the missions during his maze in Penacony. This one is one of my favorites:

It doesn't get much more on-the-nose than him calling himself a selfish, useless loser. He gets stuck on that word, in particular. Loser.

Aventurine, at his core, views himself as a massive loser. Is that ironic because of how much he wins? Not really. Money and materials are just part of the Aventurine persona. He's 'rich' in stuff, but he's not rich in what he actually wants. I think it's obvious that if he had the option to quadruple his wealth or see his sister again just one more time, we all know what he'd be picking.

The only thing he wants is connection – connection with his mother, his father, his sister, anybody at this point – but he can't have it. His family has been dead for a long while, and as I discussed before, his fear of abandonment and his luck scare him away from forming any other relationships. 

This luck, this destiny to be blessed, leads him to reflect on his life a lot and wonder what the hell the point is. He treats himself like some sort of walking curse, because he's convinced that his luck is bound to hurt other people. Every time he wins, somebody else loses. The luck that keeps him safe destroys everybody else around him. As Future Aventurine puts it:

His luck is "built on the pain of someone" else. This perpetuates the constant feeling of guilt, which in turn, makes him feel worthless. Why is it him that's spared every time?

Then, right before you start his boss fight, Aventurine says,

"The architect's flawed stone, of no value at all."

Some people speculate he's talking to the MC when he says this, but I can't help but assume that he's referring to himself. Even if it was directed at the MC, so much of what Aventurine says in his bluffs and boasts are just digs at himself. He's sort of an expert at hating himself, and what do people who hate themselves do if not project? Especially when you consider the fact that aventurine is actually a really cheap, undesired stone. It's like $3 a caret and mostly only used to rip people off and pose as jade. I really don't think it's a coincidence that his character is based around a stone that is, essentially, worthless.

The way that Aventurine is also prone to giving people ridiculous amounts of money/gifts can be read as a frantic effort to keep relationships going and prevent people from leaving him (relating to my points on both his feelings of worthless and his fear of abandonment). He has a skewed view on relationships, since the only value that's ever been associated with him is monetary value and that of his 'luck', which in every context is spoken of as an asset to benefit people he cares about. His sister told him that his luck was 'the most precious wealth' of the Avgins and Jade sees him as an investment that can bring her more wealth because of his luck, but he views it as a massive burden that ends up wrecking everybody around him. So how does he prove to other people that someone as worthless as him should be allowed a seat at the table? Deep down, he thinks that he's still worth 60 red copper pieces, and he's desperate to show other people that he's worth more than that now – even though he doesn't believe it at his core. With all the money he wins now, he can throw it at people and say 'look, look how much money I'm worth now, you want me around because I can buy you anything you want, that's a useful quality in a friend!'

(I did use the 'seat at the table line' as a nod to what his slave master said to him when they were discussing his worth: "Don't forget your place, slave. You're not qualified to be at the table." Which is, painfully, what Aventurine says when you open up chests! He scoffs and says that "it's hardly enough for a seat at the table." :’) )

There is also, of course, Aventurine's overarching struggle with finding purpose in his life. We see a lot of his existentialism during his trauma maze, but at the end of his trauma maze, Future Aventurine finally stops ripping Aventurine a new one and is vulnerable for a second, saying he doesn't understand what he's ever done wrong to have suffered as much as he has.

Then, when he's in the Nihility and he's speaking to Acheron, making the decision on whether or not he even wants to keep going, he asks her:

As I said, he has this conversation with himself in the maze as well, but here he's actually being vulnerable and speaking to somebody else about it: what's the point in being alive if we're just born to suffer? If nothing else, this solidifies the emotional struggle that Aventurine is constantly having. I also think it furthers the idea that he has this nagging sort of emptiness inside of him which is another BPD trait: the feeling that you're empty at your core, and you're constantly trying to fill it with things (friends, money, substances, whatever) but nothing ever works. You worry if anything will ever make you feel 'whole' again, and pair with the the identity disturbance? You're left with a constant feeling of despair.

Other Points:

These are a few other random thoughts I have, inspired by in-game moments but I'm taking them for my own evil fiendish BPD narrative. Take them with a grain of salt.

I think the stigma he gets around 'being crazy' is really BPD-coded. Separate from the ridiculous discrimination he gets for being an Avgin where people assume he's a liar and wolf in sheep's clothing (which can this man catch a SINGLE break jfc), he also has this reputation of being crazy, insane, manipulative, cunning, and someone you want to avoid, which is more rooted in his reckless gambling habit and status with the IPC. Living with this reputation of being insane and unstable for...lowkey no reason at all? Very BPD coded. I think Aventurine leans into that stigma to keep people a certain distance away, but it also just ends up making him hate himself even more.

Also, his entire mantra is "all or nothing", which always rang my BPD bells as well. There's not a lot of gray area with him, which is a key trait in borderlines as we often display very black-and-white thought patterns.

In Conclusion:

I think Aventurine is a borderline baddie <3

No but actually though, Aventurine is extremely smart, witty, funny, generous, and very kind-hearted, and he also happens to have a lot of BPD symptoms :^) I don't think it does any harm to view him as BPD-coded; in fact, I think it's great to associate positive, fan-favorite characters like this with BPD because it helps to humanize us. Borderlines are not violent, crazy maniacs, they're people who have been severely traumatized and developed some unhealthy habits because of it. They deserve love, respect, understanding, and communication, just as everybody else does.

If you actually made it this far, thank you for reading! I hope I was able to shed some light on Aventurine and his Symptoms. And, as I do in all of my BPD posts, here’s your reminder to kiss the borderline baddies in your life and tell them they’re important to you :^) Living with BPD is exhausting and I know I speak for all of us when I say that. We try so hard every day to stay positive and regulated, and though rewarding, it's exhausting and very hard work. Nothing makes us smile more than some recognition that we're trying our best !!

Till next time xoxo (and shout out to @roxirinart for helping me edit this monstrosity mwahhh mwah)

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 116 (Volunteering As a Family)

After Ash's run-in with his cousin Michael, Heather and Conrad looked for a way to teach him some much-needed empathy. Heather made a plan with her good friend, Dylan Richards, which would bring them to San Myshuno to help at a shelter where Dylan had volunteered for years. But first, Conrad made breakfast while Lavender watched him intently with a bowl of cereal.

Heather found her sister doing laundry. "You sure you don't mind spending the day with Lavender while we're in the city?"

"Of course not! We're gonna play in the snow for a bit and then we're going over to the Goths to spend the afternoon. I really need to catch up with Lydia, and Lava can hang with little Jag."

"Just make sure to watch her around Obsidian. She gets so excited around animals, and a crow won't appreciate her squeeze hugs." The dryer beeped beside them. "Thanks for doing laundry, but I really don't want you feeling like a maid or a babysitter. How's the job search coming?"

"Great, actually! Conrad told Alexander I could help with research and analysis for his charity campaigns, so we're going to work out a schedule this afternoon. I'll probably start next week."

"That's great, Hazel, but Brindleton Bay doesn't even have a mayor. I already adopted him! Come to think of it, I don't even know who keeps the power on in this town."

She assumed the answer her own question as soon as she voiced it. George Brindleton, most likely.

"Alex thinks he could be the first real mayor Brindleton Bay's had in decades."

Heather smiled. She didn't like thinking of their friend Alex tangling with George Brindleton. If the town had no real mayor, he probably wanted it that way, but she didn't want to sound unsupportive. "Mayor Alex Goth has a nice ring to it!"

Heather, Ash, and Conrad left Lavender and Hazel playing in the snow with Gord. When they made it to the Spice District, they met up with Dylan and her daughter, Pearl, outside the graffiti-covered Soup Kitchen. As Henford-on-Bagley's grocery deliverer in her teens, Dylan had witnessed food insecurity firsthand, and she wanted to instill a passion for helping others in her own children.

The Soup Kitchen was a welcome place for unhoused sims and volunteers of all ages. A small cafe on the site served the public, with all proceeds going to the shelter. The industrial space was also a place where creativity could run wild - they encouraged their residents to create art to beautify the walls so the place felt less like a converted canning factory and more like a place they could feel at home.

Seven-year-old Ash walked around the main room in awe, where beautifully-painted murals decorated the walls and floors. This was a side of San Myshuno he'd never seen before, nothing like the stark glass and steel of his family's Uptown penthouse a thousand feet up across the bay.

Ash loved the art, but his eyes were drawn to the beds. The room was packed with them - some small enough for Lavender and Bridgette. He was surprised to think a toddler might be unhoused. It's way too cold for Lava and Bridgie to sleep outside, he thought.

Dylan showed them around the cafe, and Ash even helped the baristas deliver food to various patrons. Heather helped serve while Conrad prepared ingredients for the shelter's dinner that evening. "Are you sure you don't want help prepping the cottage pie?"

"I've got this. I thought you were keeping an eye on Ash?"

"He went upstairs with Pearl. I think he might be meeting some of the people who use the shelter. Dylan says there's a kids' room."

Upstairs, Pearl introduced Ash to Zacharius Beard and his mother, Anjali, who had been staying at the shelter since Anjali had left her husband. "Why did you leave?" Ash wondered innocently. "Was he not nice?"

Zacharius shook his head. "Daddy's mean," he insisted. Ash opened his mouth to ask more questions, but Pearl discreetly shook her head behind the Beards.

"Are you watching a movie, Zach?" she cut in.

"I was going to. Did you want to join me? Mom can stay for a bit, but then she has to finish a mural out back by the tents."

"People live in tents here?"

"Fewer sleep outside in the winter, but some don't want to stay inside with kids," explained Anjali. "But they can still come here to eat and shower whenever they need to."

"Do you watch a lot of movies?"

"The movies I like, I watch a lot," Zach said. "But I don't always have someone to watch them with me. There aren't a lot of other kids here right now. Last time Pearl was here she tried to teach me to plié, but I'm not very good at ballet."

"No one's better at ballet than Pearl," said Ash.

"I'm only good for my age. So far," Pearl insisted with a confident smile. "But one day I'll dance Swan Lake with the SanMy Ballet Company."

Anjali smiled. "I have no doubt you will, Miss Pearl. But I hope you'll all excuse me while I get painting."

"Did your mom do all the murals here?" Ash wondered.

"Most were already here, but she's an artist."

"I could do art on my craft table and bring it another time," Ash said thoughtfully. "Or can you do crafts here?"

"If we get enough donated art stuff, we can, but craft supplies get lost, toddlers eat the crayons, and most of the cafe money goes to food and stuff we need, not stuff we like," explained Zach. "We're not allowed to use the mural paint."

Downstairs, Conrad and Heather were chatting in the kitchen while a hearty cottage pie baked in the oven. "It smells incredible, Conrad. What ingredients did you use?"

"I could tell you that, but this recipe is a Gordon family secret. You've got to marry in to get it."

"There's still snow on the ground," she reminded him. "No coats, and no one freezing to death! That is the least I could hope for at our wedding."

He laughed. "Then the secret ingredients stay with me. For now."

"Would Ben know it? Maybe I'll try to ask him with Mrs. Goth's seance table," she teased, and with a sudden hiss, the power inside The Soup Kitchen went out. The lights in the large kitchen went dark, the electric stove stopped baking, and the movie upstairs shut off with a click.

"What happened?" asked Pearl, looking around fearfully and noting every light in the building was out.

"Power outages happen a lot," said Zach. "My mom says the building should have better wiring, but it's too expensive. But sometimes when the power goes out, we don't get warm dinner. Just snacks."

Listening to Zach, Ash stood with conviction. "We don't need the power on to make dinner. I have an idea!" ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 2.1 Summary

Gen 1 Start | Gen 1 Summary

ICYMI Cozy Winterfest Xtras: Winterfest With Bella Goth & Happy Holidays from the Nesbitt-Landgraab-Gordon Household

WCIF Soup Kitchen: This phenomenal lot by Fejuna in the Sims 4 Gallery. It's stunning and so detailed and the setting helped me write the story, so thank you a million times to Fejuna, and to every builder who makes my gameplay time so much more fun by sharing such incredible creations.

[ooooo-mcyt]

I love reading your character analysis, thanks for putting so much out there. Wanted to talk a bit more about life!Scott.

You said you see him going to kill Joel in the wild life finale as a moment where he acts on his own wishes rather than his usual self sacrifice pattern. Do you see that as character change/growth, or do you think its more based on the unusual circumstances? At that point Impulse is dead and no one left on his team wants to win. Does Scott go after Joel because he's free from the responsibility of helping a teammate? (Be it in a positive self fulfilment way or in a negative got nothing else left to do kinda way.) Or in your view would he have acted for himself even with Impulse alive?

I think it was still a kind of sacrifice anyway, committing his final life to trying to take down the biggest threat, even if he was running out of people to do it for. And that motive would come into it more if Impulse was still alive.

Are things only even different this time because Joel has changed how he behaves, not attacking Scott like every other time, so Scott has to go to him? How much of the impetus is coming from Scott himself?

- @mossy-cobble-slab

Unfortunately, I don't think Scott is anywhere near ready to start acting out of personal desire. In Wild Life, we see the culmination of a lot of Scott's most self destructive traits- the way he's so determined to keep the team together no matter what, the way he lets two teammates get away with independently plotting against him, the way he gave up a life willingly to his team, the way he gave in during team conflicts and let the others have their way with only the flimsy stipulation that they agree not to collude against him again. I don't see Wild Life as character growth for Scott, if anything, most of Wild Life reinforced his repressive and self sacrificing behavior.

Scott probably didn't attack Joel for his own sake. I'm sure his main intention was probably to weaken one of the strongest players for the sake of his team rather than to act on any grudge he may have against Joel. (although i wouldn't write off the idea that scott did also just want to fight joel, and that this subconsciously influenced him deciding that attacking him was the 'best' course of action.)

However, while Scott probably wasn't acting solely on personal desire when he attacked Joel, I still see the moment overall as a small win. Because while it was ostensibly probably about his team, I absolutely think Scott got caught up in the fight. He was absolutely more exhilarated in the Wild Life finale than he has been in any of his more traditional sacrifices, and notably, Scott didn't mention his team in his closing statement. No "I wouldn't have it any other way" or "Sometimes you gotta take one for the band". If he did attack Joel for his team's sake (which he probably did), that motivation got lost a little bit in the moment.

That's actually one of the big reasons I love Scott and Joel's "rivalry", while Scott still always needs a way to justify fighting Joel (because scott is extremely repressed and won't let himself act on desires that aren't "good"), when Scott does engage with Joel, Joel has a way of making Scott a little bit reckless and a little bit giddy, gives Scott an excuse to give in to the exhilaration of the game for a little bit in ways Scott doesn't normally do.

So- do I think Scott was really just acting out of personal desire when he attacked Joel? No. Do I think that was a result of character progression? No. But I do think it was a small win, a moment where Scott got to think about something other than being a good sacrifice for a little bit, the kind of moment Joel is good at pulling out of Scott by giving himself an excuse to let himself act that way. That's valuable even if Scott's still not ready to actually think about his own desires or act on them without an excuse to.