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thisblogisaboutabook · 9 months ago

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Rainy Season - Part 3

Storm Warning

Azriel Eris x Reader

We’ve got a time jump and are swapping points of view for this chapter y’all.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 4

3 months later

Eris Vanserra hated the Summer Court. The humidity anywhere outside of the temperature regulated zones of Adriata, the way his hair clung to his forehead and caused curls to form in his otherwise immaculate hair, but most of all it was just insulting to be so bothered by the heat itself when he quite literally had fire in his veins. He couldn’t get out of here fast enough.

Tarquin strode alongside Eris through the open air lower levels of his keep, three of his guards and two of Eris’ own flanking them several feet behind, one could almost forget they were there if not for the “click clack” of feet echoing through the halls. Eris would be lying if he said he didn’t have to try very hard to focus on the mundane talk of trade routes and port authorities instead of getting lost to the sounds of crashing waves and gulls outside.

Tarquin broached the riveting subject of tariffs on imports from the continent as the first rumble of thunder boomed in the distance. Now that - Eris enjoyed that aspect of the court. Autumn had no shortage of rain but the turbulence of storms often mirrored his own inner peril - made him feel less alone in the world. And truthfully, there was nothing like taking cover from the rain and listening to the rumble outside, watching the lightning dance across the skies as the loud cracks of thunder commanded the attention of anyone within earshot.

“Have your people felt the same effects, High Lord?” Tarquin broke Eris from yet another drift of his thoughts. He really should have brought a secretary or advisor along for this meeting.

Sparing Eris from the embarrassment of asking Tarquin to repeat his last three minutes of speech a cry broke through the hall. The battle cry of a…. Child?

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

Followed by a yelp of “ow!”

Eris’ head jerked as he found himself drifting toward the action.

Turning a corner he found a woman laying on the ground, curled into a ball - a child of no more than 10 with a large jagged stick standing over her with his chest puffed out, pure smug joy on his face.

Eris looked to Tarquin who only grinned with satisfaction. Eris gaped before Tarquin quietly whispered, “just watch.”

The woman didn’t move. The child’s look of satisfaction slowly turning to that of concern as she lay there. He bent over the woman placing a hand on her shoulder, his brows knit together. “Lady L/N?”

So focused on the woman on the ground before him, the boy didn’t notice her arm slowly sneak around him and “Oof!” The kid let out a startled breath as she grabbed his ankle, ripping it out from beneath him, effectively leaving the child on his behind.

The female lept up into a crouching position. Her tanned, muscled thighs pushing her up to stand effortlessly. “And that, little ones, is why you never let your guard down with an adversary.”

Eris turned, wondering how he could have missed the group of children sitting on the other end of the room watching the scene unfold.

The boy remained on his behind, hands resting on his forehead in defeat.

“Hey-“ She reached a hand out to help him up. “You did a great job. You quite literally swept me off my feet! Nobody has done that in quite some time.” She paused, sadness twisting her features as if her own words struck her before shifting back to that of a proud instructor. “In fact - I have something for you.”

She reached into the pocket of her calf-length, flowy pants and reaching handing him a shell. “Add this to your leather strap.” She tapped a leather bracelet on his wrist, one shell already strung on it. “You did great, kid.” The boy gave her a genuine smile as he returned to the rest of his classmates.

Eris shifted involuntarily. How much had he wished for someone to say those words to him when he was a child?

Tarquin chuckled “An excellent motivator. Shells. Who knew?”

Eris gave a small smile - brief but genuine before adjusting back into his usual mask. The instructor turned to face them and cauldron damn him if she wasn’t the most gorgeous thing he’d ever seen. Radiant skin that came from plenty of time in the sun, silky hair that practically begged to have fingers run through it, a soft and curvy yet toned build. A body that told him she indulged herself in what she enjoyed but was active enough to define her plush features, likely blessed with great genetics - lithe yet perfectly squeezable in all his favorite places.

“High Lord.” Her voice carried to him like an ocean breeze. She bowed her head in a respectful greeting, long lashes fluttering. “How may I be of service?”

“Lady L/N,” Tarquin beamed. “It’s a pleasure to introduce you to Eris Vanserra, High Lord of the Autumn Court.”

Her brow puzzled for a brief moment before bowing her head again. “It’s an honor to meet you, High Lord.”

“A pleasure to meet you as well, lady.” Eris replied sincerely, meeting her bright eyes. “I didn’t realize Tarquin was hoarding such beauty within his keep.”

“We have many treasures in our court, High Lord. She is one of our brightest.”

Rather than blushing, the female held her head high, giving a polite “Thank you, High Lord.”

“We must be getting to lunch now. Have a pleasant rest of your class, Lady L/N.” He turned to the children with a stern look “And children, behave for her.” following the reminder with a smile and cheeky wink.

—————

It was hours later that Eris was released from meetings for the day. Unfortunately, there was still more to be discussed that would have to wait for tomorrow. Making the way to his guest suite, Eris found himself wondering about the instructor from earlier. Something about her felt vaguely familiar but he couldn’t quite place it.

After changing out of his stuffy clothes into something more befitting of the climate, Eris paced his room. He’d forgotten how much longer daylight lasted here than in his own court, with several hours remaining before dusk. He supposed he could brave the heat and take a stroll through the palace grounds, preferably without his entourage of guards.

Relieving the pair from their duties, Eris wandered through the gardens and toward a small grove of trees on the other side of the palace grounds. He could hear running water from a garden tributary that likely connected into the river that emptied into Adriata’s harbor.

Sauntering through the grove, he was pleased to find reprieve from the heat, the cool air wafting off of the stream and shade from the trees turning the grove into a private oasis. It wasn’t particularly trekked through. “Finally.” he thought to himself. A moment of peace.

Situating himself on an iron bench, Eris looked up, only to find that through a thicket of cattails, Lady L/N was standing on a rock upstream, eyes closed and balancing on one leg. Given her steady, intentional breathing he supposed she was meditating. It was odd - seeing her like this - strangely intimate to see someone in such an isolated state of catharsis, unaware of his own presence before her. The sun rays shone through cracks in the leaves, shrouding her in tiny fragments of light that made her tanned skin near golden. Her hair was wind blown from the breeze winding through the grove off the ocean, and she’d changed into a thin cotton sundress. Gods, maybe the Summer Court wasn’t so bad after all. The way it effortlessly flowed over her body perfectly accentuating her ample curves, and those tanned, toned legs - yeah, he should probably leave.

After momentary internal warring he began to stand but before he could sneak off, she gasped. Clutching her arms to her rib cage. “MOTHER FUCKER!” she screamed. Vulgar words coming from such a pretty mouth.

What an interesting method of meditation.

She took several breaths before resuming her position. Another minute went by when she audibly growled. “Bastard!!” She clutched herself again, keeling over. Finally she sat down on the rock, the hem of her dress soaking in the stream’s rippling water, and pressed her head into her hands. Eris thought she was crying.

He really should leave but - memories of his mother crying over the years flashed into his mind. All the years that she only had he or Lucien to console her, kindered spirits brought together by Beron’s casual cruelty. His other brothers being the emotionally void carbon copies of their father they were, paid no mind to their mother’s plight.

Yet still, he didn’t know her. She didn’t know him. She likely didn’t want him bothering her.

Against his better judgement, he found himself drawn in by her familiarity and approached. As he drew closer, he realized her sobs were not sobs at all. She was muttering the raunchiest, most vile slew of curses that he’d ever heard. Lucien would enjoy this female.

As he approached, she jerked her head up. The lovely, collected face from earlier twisted into one of contempt. He wondered if she knew that, that face was, well, adorable like a fierce little kitten. Although, something told him to tread carefully. She may look adorable but he’d bet good coin that her bite matched that of a lions.

“What do you want?” She spat.

Eris only smirked. “And here I thought you were a lady.”

Baiting her. Genius idea, Eris.

“Only within the palace.”

“You’re still on palace grounds.” Shrugging with the statement, Eris put his hands in his pockets - damn these Summer Court linens really were comfortable.

“Well, I was alone until you intruded.” she murmured, not meeting his eyes.

“Did you win Tarquin’s good graces with such manners?”

Her expression filled with ire as she looked up at him. “Did you take your throne by being such a prick?”

Eris couldn’t help but laugh at her bravado. This female either REALLY didn’t like him or truly didn’t care about consequences. “Ah, so you do know who I am.”

“You’re a High Lord. Of course I know-“

Her words cut off as she clutched her ribs again, tighter this time. A shudder escaping her. This time the pain seemed to last longer. And this time he could have sworn her voice cracked as she swore.

“Hey” Eris stepped into the creek, not bothering to step out of his sandals. Before he could hesitate he crouched down before her, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Breathe.”

The thing was, he recognized that pain well. It has been centuries but damn he remembered it so clearly.

“Breathe through it. Think of something that makes you smile.”

She clutched herself harder, shaking her head. “Think of the look on your student’s face when you gave him that shell today.”

She breathed in deeply this time instead of letting out another curse.

“Good. Hold for three beats.”

“Now let the breath out.”

She breathed out. “In again.” He instructed. She followed suit. “Now out.”

As her breath steadied, she met his eyes - momentarily soft, a little broken, before ire crossed them again.

“For fucks sake, High Lord.” She spat. “I came here to meditate. I know how to breathe.”

She sure as shit seemed to have forgotten how to for a moment there, but he kept that to himself.

He only let out a soft laugh.

“There she is.”

She scowled in return.

“So, Lady L/N” he began, standing and extending a hand to help her up.

“Y/N.” She interjected, taking his hand. “Call me Y/N.”

Y/N. Fitting, he thought. The kind of name a tropical storm would be given.

Wait. Y/N L/N. Oh, he knew exactly why she was so familiar now. No wonder she’d given him that puzzled look in the palace. And, if Eris recalled correctly, his brother actually was rather fond of her - in a friendly and platonic sort of way. Though in his tales of the Night Court he’d certainly never mentioned the fact that she looked like a gods damned deity.

He led her out of the creek, not quite ready to drop her delicate hand. “So, Y/N, tell me about this idiot mate that let the Summer Court’s brightest treasure go.”

She gaped, jaw dropping into a look of genuine shock. “How-“

“I had one too. I believe you know her.”

—————

Eris and Y/N spent hours talking in the grove. He gave her all the details of his mate, Morrigan. How it killed him to leave her that fated day. Had he touched her, his mate, Beron would have claimed her as Autumn Court property requiring a Blood Duel for the Night Court to retrieve her. Though, Beron would have ensured she never left unharmed. That aside, Eris didn’t want that blood on her hands, the blood of a blood duel or any battles over her. He didn’t want it on his hands either. It killed him to feel her pain down the bond starting from their forced engagement and through the torture her father had inflicted upon her, and the trauma that lingered thereafter. The gut-wrenching, immobilizing pain that only a mate could feel shooting through to them.

He never wanted her to feel that pain. If it hurt him that badly to only feel it down the bond, he couldn’t imagine the strife she’d felt. He wanted to run to her, to comfort her, to tell her everything he couldn’t risk saying. He was too young to face the ramifications from his father and he had his mother and Lucien to protect in those days. So he protected her in the only way he knew how to at the time. Through cold, calculated indifference. He still regretted it.

As time went on, the mask he wore became heavier and heavier, burying that bond deeper within himself. It took him until after the war with Hybern to finally lay it all out to her. Y/N never knew any of that part of the story. She knew Mor and Eris had made amends but nothing of their bond, and she knew that Mor was happily committed to Emerie, an Illyrian female now. He was happy for his mate, as happy as a rejected mate could be.

Eris never claimed to have been in the right. In fact, what he did to Mor was wrong. The way he spoke to her as if she was no more than a common whore when facing her in front of his father at the High Lord’s meeting. Yes, it was an act but it was never okay. He’d live with that for the rest of his days. His apologies to her since never felt like enough.

Y/N empathized with Eris. He could see that she was torn but her gaze toward him softened although, never into that of pity. He liked that about her.

She shared the story of her mating bond with Azriel. And how the waves of anger and grief down the bond had increased in strength recently as she had continued healing. She laughed bitterly at the typical trajectory of females in her situation getting better over time while unfaithful males seemed to spiral as it went on. She didn’t say who he had cheated on her with but Eris had his suspicions. The Shadowsinger apparently had a thing for Vanserra mates. She laughed and cried over the hours they talked. They’d eventually ended up back in a palace seating area for a drink.

Eris hadn’t been so open with someone like this in so long that it felt foreign. Hell, opening up always felt unnatural for him. Perhaps he was stupid for sharing with her. After all, mating bonds could make people do crazy things. She could always take Azriel back and share the details of his little sob stories with the Night Court.

She’d occasionally let out a sharp breath as small jolts of emotion came rolling in. It was nearing dusk when she finally huffed, slapping her hands on her thighs saying, “Enough! This tea is weak. I need something stronger.” Pouring them each a glass of brandy, and another, and another.

As the conversation shifted from the heavier topics to lighter ones, Eris let it slip that he wasn’t fond of the summer court and found all of the sand and humidity to be unpleasant at best.

Her inhibitions were down and if Eris were being honest with himself, his were too. He hadn’t drank much since becoming a High Lord though he often felt the need for a stiff drink. No, there was too much work to be done and he was still getting his own inner circle acclimated. Trust was harder to give in the Autumn Court, especially after being under his father’s rule for so long. There were plenty of good people in the castle but just as many were corrupted under Beron’s rule. Weeding them out was consuming more of his time than anticipated.

Somehow, after their fourth drink, Y/N dragged him out onto the beach, determined to show him all the merits of the crusty, sand-infested shores.

Admittedly, her joy was contagious but he was going to make her work for any positive reaction.

“Okay!” She eagerly squealed. “First - sand castles! Have you ever built one?”

“I live in a castle.” Eris feigned boredom, inspecting his nails. “It seems unnecessary to build one out of… that.” his nose scrunched up, lip curling into a sneer as he gestured to the sand surrounding them.

“Ughhh.” Her eyes rolled back into her head as her little sun dress blew in the wind. And damn if he wouldn’t love to see her eyes going back into her head like that in other circumstances.

He was a gentlemale but a male nevertheless.

“Being High Lord doesn’t mean you have to be such a bore, but fine… No sand castles. Maybe next time!”

Next time. He liked the thought of that. My how far she’d come from practically snarling at him just this morning.

“Look!” She squealed, bringing her hands to her chest and clapping with excitement. “Dolphins! Now I know you don’t have those in the Autumn Court, Eris Vanserra.”

Fuck, his name sounded so good coming off of her lips.

He couldn’t resist smiling at her enthusiasm and then at the dolphins. They swam so peacefully in a pod through the harbor. One even let a young water wraith trail alongside it as a hand carefully gripped onto its dorsal fin as the creature pulled her along.

“The wraiths and dolphins coexist well together.” Y/N mused wistfully. “There’s a common misconception that they are territorial due to food supply but they have plenty in the harbor.”

She smiled softly. “The younger wraiths tend to bond with them and the dolphins have even been known to protect them from certain dangers.”

As the pair continued walking along the shore, the conversation occasionally faltered as Y/N would stare off distantly, as if looking for something that wasn’t there.

His heart ached for her. From what he’d gathered during their talk, she’d left the Shadowsinger, but the heart is slow to heal after losing a mate in any capacity.

Eris nudged her with his shoulder. “Hey little minx, where’d you go?”

Coming back to reality she halted. “Oh! Oh my gods. The sun is setting and you have to come with me! Hurry.”

She grabbed his wrist and he didn’t hesitate to follow along as she all but dragged him down the beach. “Hurry! We’ll miss them!”

They ran until reaching a secluded inlet of the bay. They climbed up a small rocky ledge where she sat, dangling her feet over the edge. “There’s an underwater cave-“ she breathed heavy, catching her breath. “here, beneath us and every night-“ another pause to breathe. “something magical happens as the sun sets.”

Eris, catching his own breath, waited patiently for more details but she only dropped a small pebble into the water and as she did, a rainbow of luminescent fish rippled to life below the surface. There had to be thousands of them, leisurely swimming out of the cave as if they were just waking up. Shades of bright pink, green, blue, orange, and purple lit up the small inlet. Eris was awestruck, so awestruck in fact that he didn’t hesitate planting his ass next to her on the crusty sand-coated ledge.

With a wave of her wrist she pulled a bottle of rum out from the pocket realm, tugging the cork out with her teeth and taking a swig, then handing it over to him.

They sat in silence as the remaining fish left the inlet and the remaining colors of the sunset disappeared into night. Clouds began rolling in as they drank and began chatting again. Much like that morning, thunder rolled in but this time he was disappointed to hear it. He didn’t want the evening to end, wasn’t ready to let her go quite yet.

He wished he’d had a warning before the ocean winds blew this wild, beautiful storm into his life that morning. Something to brace himself against the inevitable fallout of the precarious situation he found himself in. It was a storm he was prepared to ride out and he had a feeling it would be worth whatever debris she’d leave him with.

The base of the distant thunder rumbling, the cymbal-like crash of waves on the shore, and singing of the creatures of summer nights blended together into a beautiful melody that flowed through Eris. Quickly he stood, extending a hand to her. “Dance with me, Y/N?”

She froze, that distant look crossing her eyes again for a second. He braced himself for her decline but the life returned to her eyes as a smile graced her full lips. She accepted his hand and didn’t hesitate as he tucked her into his chest, her warmth and scent lulling him into a state of bliss.

No, Eris Vanserra did not hate the Summer Court at all.

————————

This was a long one and I know it wasn’t from our girls POV but I hope you all enjoyed it 🥹 Stay tuned for more! Her story is not done yet.

Tags:

@going-through-shit @kalulakunundrum @lisanna2000 @fxckmiup @sheblogs @emryb @one-big-fangirl @historygeekqueen @isa1b2h3 @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @theravenphoenix26 @sidthedollface2 @i-am-infinite @caraaaaugh @evergreenlark @darkbloodsly @piceous21 @anxious-study

#sarah j maas #acotar #a court of thorns and roses #azriel #a court of silver flames #a court of frost and starlight #a court of mist and fury #a court of wings and ruin #azriel shadowsinger #azriel x reader #eris x reader #summer court #tarquin #eris vanserra #eris x oc #eris vandaddy #inspired by Hunter Hayes #storm warning Hunter Hayes

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cornyforjk · 2 months ago

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Drive you crazy | Day 4 | jjk

⤷ SUMMARY In which you are stuck living with an arrogant rookie racer who thinks of you as an obstacle, ready to ruin your glory, but things get heated when he has a pervy smile hidden under that pretentious attitude. Emotions that are complicated. You could never fall for your enemy! He's sabotaging you.

Pairing: racer!jk × racer!oc

Genre: angst and pure filth smut

Warnings: trash language

taglist: @tatamicc @jwnghyuns @nono13bnd @hagridshaircare @tatzzz-25 @suashifts

A/ note: Hello hello hello,,,, ik it's been like,what? 10 days. More than 10 days infact. But I was kinda stuck somewhere 🥴 and I did post part 4 one day but idk why it's format wouldn't be the way I wanted it to be,,, like ykwim. Anyways, I'm trying again and I hope it works today 🤞🤞 hope you guys enjoy 💕 (Added links for the first time thank you so much @redcherrykook ily💕)

___________________♡____________________

"What's with all these boxes?" I heard a sigh coming from the living room. Walking out of my bed I look over the commotion with a smile.

"Chocolates," I answer.

"Why?" He seemed pained looking at the bundle of sweets all spread out on the table. "Can't you keep them in your room?"

"But it's for you."

"Me?" He points at himself, innocently with huge bubbly eyes of confusion.

"But I hate chocolates." He points with disgust, ignoring my judging eyes and internal screams at his horrible taste.

Not only has he got a bad attitude but also bad taste buds.

"Why would you hate chocolate?!" I screech, "it's chocolate for fuck's sake! The only saviour at sad times."

"I don't like it. Who even sent it anyway?"

"I did!" My voice was wavering with panic. "I thought you liked chocolate...so I bought it as an apology." Watching his curious face drop into a sulky one didn't help my beating heart which probably pumped out my anxiety rather than blood.

"Where did you even get this information?" He arches his eyebrow in question.

"I googled it." My honest answer has him parting his lips as he tries to form words. "You are a famous rookie. The website has your likes and dislikes listed."

Jungkook dismissively waves his hand, "you had one job..." his voice lowered. "I will always hate chocolate." Those last words were barely a whisper. My eyes shot up towards his face, the quick vulnerability flashing back into his cocky self.

I clear my throat.

"It also said that you wear your special iron man socks while racing and in bed."

Subconsciously Jungkook crosses a leg over another trying to hide his redand yellow socks that look like the character.

"Well, you wear mismatched socks." He bickers, hands on his hip.

I shut my mouth tight, holding in a laugh that burst out sounding like a chicken having asthma.

"Ha-ha, very funny," the tall guy rolls his eyes walking out of the place.

"I still hate chocolate as much as I hate you."

___________________♡____________________

With a beaten body and tired scowl, I walked into my room slamming the door shut, feeling his eyes on my back, the stare leaves me frozen still staring at the wooden door trying to burn it as an escape option.

He doesn't question me. Doesn't ask me where I have been.Shows that he doesn't care.

And a part of me feels empty without his bickering, like half of our conversations depended on our arguments.

I tightly fist my hand towering over Jungkook, boring holes in his face watching him keep his motorsports book aside. He reads, has a hidden tattoo covering his left arm, shows respect towards invasive paparazzi...what all am I yet to know about him? It's like every time I feel like I figured him out he pulls out an Uno reverse card.

"Why won't you just let it go? I know where I went wrong and I am sorry I didn't listen to you. Fairly I didn't know what Alex was like and all you said was 'don't race' so it didn't help." I confess, fiddling with my fingers. He shuffles, getting on his legs and fleeting into the kitchen without answering.

"You didn't even answer-"

He turns around tearing a piece of tissue and stuffing it in my mouth as I gag. The taste of dried woody papermixing in my mouth.

"What the hell?!" "If you don't want me to permanently shut your porthole, then you better walk out of this place."

Storming out of the room I walk straight into someone's chest, wobbling back with a dizzy head, my eyes trail to his face. His familiar smile with dimples in view with his shiny golden brown hair.

"Mr Joon!" I exaggerate his name, trying to smile back but a pressed thin line forms.

"Is it about him?" He raises his thick eyebrow, uncertain to meet my eye as he scans the door behind me trying to gaze through with the help of a mere peephole.

"How do you know?""It's a small controversy going on around here. No wonder the cheerleaders are jealous." He blurts out, batting his eye whilst taking a step back. "Plus...you could say I know him a little too well."

"Should've seen that coming, no wonder he threw you that funny look in the hallway on our first day and pretended to not know you."

Namjoon chuckles, "sounds like our Jungkook."

"Our gang can help you with his bratty attitude, we have been in your position too many times." He smiles with glinting eyes, pulling me across the hallways behind the inn where the pool resides.

Namjoon waves over a group of young-looking men huddling around the patio, my eyes feel blessed at that moment when we make our way towards them, gaze residing on their flawless faces.

"Y/n, meet our gang. The bangtan boys." Namjoon lightly shoves me forward as all the boys create circle around me, my eyes glinting with excitement as each of them start questioning me with the same excitement.

"Hi! I am Jimin, the 'wanted' one," his orange head wobbled as he smiled sideways, coming over for a side hug that I returned with gratitude. Jimin was a well-known racer in the industry with millions of fangirls behind him almost all the time.

I turn around squealing when I find a mint haired guy waving at me with his boxy smile, "KIM TAEHYUNG AND SUNSHINE HOBI!"

"Sunshine what-" He's startled by my sudden outburst, my face reddening as I second-hand embarrass myself.

"It's a name given by your fans..." I kick the floor, whispering in a faint voice.

Hoseok chuckles with Taehyung, removing the leather gloves covering their hand as they bring it forward to shake with mine.

"Call us Tae and Hobi, it's cute coming from your mouth," they gigglechildishly, warming my heart.

"Operation win Jungkook over is in the process!" Hoseok's fist pumps in the air as everyone starts discussing a perfect plan to make up for my foolish mistake.

"He likes sugar mallows." Suddenly behind me appears Min Yoongi and Seokjin, the oldest racers here. My heart suddenly jumps out as I stare at them holding a few boxes of cereal.

Taehyung scoots over, Jin and Yoongie sit over smiling at me as I return with a nod. "He likes those marshmallow cereals? Wow-" I am left speechless at his selection of food.

"Trust me, he will go head over heels for this." Jin squeals, winking towards Namjoon which leaves me questioning.

___________________♡____________________

I take a deep breath ready for war. It's about to strike midnight as I walk back to my shared room, glancing back and forth at the dark hallways waiting for some kind of jumpscare, breeze from open windows letting out a hollered noise that has my skin shivering. I quicken my pace, slamming the door behind me to see Jungkook standing in the balcony with the wind ruffling his hair as if praising him.

I stopped in my tracks when my eyes landed on his broad back with muscular shoulders that turned me on, my fingers wishing to grab onto them leaving a trail.

Peeking into the open box of cereal given by Jin I wholeheartedly pour in some milk, my heart leaping as I think of offering some to Jungkook.

With two bowls in my hand, I make my way to the open porch. Jungkook hangs his head between his shoulders, grasping the railing tight with visible veins running across his arm.

"Are you alright?" I whisper, mostly startling him as he lifts his head with an alarmed expression. "I bought vousome cereal?" With uncertainty I raise the bowl in thin air waiting for his eyes to pool with excitement, maybe he would be jumpy on his feet at the smell of sugary soggy cereal, but no. He didn't move an inch.

He just let out an exasperated sigh of defeat. "Go away," Jungkook mumbled slowly, looking away from my eyes.

"What's on your mind Jeon," I placed the bowl aside, trying to take a look at him from behind and for the first time I felt his huge bulky body standing tall beside me. He seemed so big and strong, the intimidating expression being a compliment to his looks. He looked even more beautiful at night.

"You don't have to share, just have this with me." I gesture over towards the milk-filled bowls with a pressed smile full of hopefulness.

"Fine." He harshly grabs a bowl scooting over to sit on the floor casually with his legs crossed. "But you can sit in the chair!" I exclaimed but he shook his head. "I like it here." He meekly said.I have no choice but to sit facing him, watching the beautiful view of California that left me breathless, it just seemed like a dream, but what felt even more surreal was the man sitting in front of me with his midnight black bangs covering his doe eyes, slurping the milky marshmallows with content.

"Feeling better?" I quietly ask. Earning a hum.

We sat there quietly with comforting silence, little squeals of pleasure and sugar kicking in our bodies. Raking our spoons in the milk scooping up the crunchies while playing with loops.

"How'd you know I like this?" He questioned.

"That will be my secret." I wryly smile, shoving the empty bowls at the back, making room for my feet to spread comfortably.

"You do know you just served me cereal in the middle of the night?" he whispered playfully.

"Think of it as a midnight snack." I wink."Jungkook...I am sorry." I breathe in, "I hurt people, that's what I am good at. Unfortunately." A bittersweet chuckle leaves my parted lips, guilt seeping in when I try forming words. "We didn't start on the right foot, why not try the left this time?"

Bringing my hand forward, I wait for Jungkook to shake it. Just give me a chance. We are just racers ready to come at each other's throats, But, Why not try to get along?

For once.

"I don't need a protector Jungkook, just a friend."

He brings his hand forward, hesitant when our warm skin grazes together, I feel him enveloping my hand in his, a wave of satisfaction gushing over me.

I never want to let his hand go. It feels safe and soft like a newborn. But they don't fit together perfectly.

We are two different people, with different views. Being friends witheach other is hard for us, hard to understand. No wonder they don't fit perfectly.

"Don't tell me you use baby lotion now," I smirk. He looks away, trying his best to hide the small curve rising atthe edge of his lips.

Maybe Jeon Jungkook knows how to smile after all.

He silently grabs the bowl behind me, stuffing his mouth with cereal and continuing to stare at me. Even in the dark, I could make out his droopy eyes, dark circles, that were carrying all the unexplainable tension he didn't share.

"Go to sleep, grinch, or would you like me cuddling you till you've fallen asleep," Nudging him with a teasing tone he smiles, a little toothy grin that fogged my brain.

He snorts, "You need therapy Y/n."

"Therapy is just paid gossip my boy."

I pat his head, going in for the ruffle when he swats it away, his facial features tensing with a line between his eyebrows."Tomorrow's the race. "

I stop in my tracks. Glancing back from my shoulder, This sudden unexplainable tension filled the air, my heavy breath visible.

What got me so nervous all of a sudden?

I start tapping my foot, fiddling with my nails, biting the inside of my cheek.

"And...?" I felt the back of my neck warm up, tiny beads of sweat sliding down my back.

He wouldn't do anything to hurt me tomorrow in the name of race? Would he?

Jungkook just sighed, standing tall, his dark silhouette walking towards me whilst I stood frozen. I feel his eyes staring into my soul, his hand slowly placed on my shoulder. I stiffen at the small strokes he skims on the sides of my neck.

Everywhere he touched my skin would burn with fire, hitching breath stuck atthe bottom of my throat. But my eyes clung to his illuminated skin under the moon.

He's beautiful...

Jungkook pulls me out of his trance with a throaty cough, pulling me closer as I squeak. "If they overtake your path then turn to the side and let them. Their desire to win is unquenched, and people do anything to satisfy their thirst."

"Don't come in their way, Y/n."

___________________♡____________________

Day3 | Day5

DM me or send an ask if you wanna be added to the taglist.

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vampzity · 10 months ago

Text

𝙈𝙮 𝙊𝙙𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙔𝙤𝙪..

Pairing: idol! hongjoong x f!reader

Genre: fluff, bit of angst, valentine’s day, one shot, valentines series, pet names (mama), mini idol au, rapper au, strong language, arguing

Synopsis: It’s Valentine’s Day, probably one of your favorite holidays to spend with Hongjoong who you’ve been with for almost 4 years now. You both planned to go out for dinner at a new 5-star restaurant that opened in Seoul, which critics and fellow idol friends raved about. Hongjoong told you days before that he’d meet you at the restaurant after he finished up with the boy’s studio time for their upcoming album and you were okay with that. However, when you arrive, he’s not present. What seems like minutes soon turns into an hour as his presence never shows. Did you get stood up,.. on Valentine’s Day?

Now Playing: Star 1117 - ATEEZ

Word Count: 3.1k

A/N: welcome to the first member involved in my Valentine’s Day series! I will be doing all Ateez members and will be uploading on different days, so please be patient :)) enjoy!

Masterlist Seonghwa's Pt.

“Ugh.. where is he??!!”

You sat in the corner of a restaurant growing impatient as time continued to pass. It was now 8 o’clock and your reservation time was for 6. Constantly checking your phone for notifications, even for calls from him hoping that he’d respond and he wasn’t actually blowing you off. Blow you off for what though? You guys have been together for almost 4 years now.. why now? Why would he all of a sudden abandon you without explanation?

You unlocked your phone, quickly clicking on your conversation to text him again.

You: Where are you??!!! It’s been 2 hours now! Hongjoong, we’ve planned this for weeks now.. there’s no way you’d just forget?!

You locked the phone and set it back on the table, looking around once more as you tried to fight back the tears ready to fall. Another message just ignored like the 5 messages and 10 calls you’ve sent.

“Miss, it’s getting to be 8 now. Would you like to take your order now? If not, I’m going to have to ask you to leave… I’m sorry.”

A young man dressed in a suit and tie stood before you, a worried look settled on his face as he held the menu in his hands. Anger took hold of you as you grabbed your phone and put your jacket on quickly. Apologizing to the waiter, you stormed out of the restaurant, feeling a rush of tears slide down your embarrassed cheeks. You grabbed your phone, anxious to even call the drivers that served under your boyfriend’s company. You looked up at the sky, feeling a small breeze hit your face as you sighed.

“I can’t fucking believe this.”

Your eyes met the horizon as you lowered your head, beginning to walk towards the home both you and Hongjoong shared. You didn’t need the drivers contacting Hongjoong about your sudden change of plans from the restaurant if they didn’t see him there with you. You didn’t want him to contact you at all. He ignored you for practically half of the day, and wouldn’t even respond to the texts and calls you repeatedly sent him. Now look, walking home alone, sad and hungry. How could you ever forgive him for this?

You sighed once more, unlocking your phone to call Hongjoong one last time before completely giving up. However, after a couple of rings, you were met with his voicemail once again.

“Hey! This is Hongjoong! Sorry I couldn’t pick up your call but I’ll be sure to get back to you soon! Leave a message! BEEP—”

You felt your body heat up as anger fueled you more and more, your face flushing with it as well. As much as you hated arguing, even yelling with him, you could no longer resist. He deserved to hear your pain, hear how upset he made you, how he abandoned you with no explanation on Valentine’s Day of all days.

“I can’t believe you! How could you do this to me?? On Valentine’s Day Jjoong? Are you kidding me?!” You felt waves of hot tears begin to fall down your cheeks again as your lips quivered. “You couldn’t even return my texts, couldn’t call me at least to let me know a change of plans?! You left me there for 2 hours, 2 whole fucking hours Jjoong!!! Why now?! Why do you want to suddenly ditch me like this now?!”

You paused to catch your breath as your tears began to feel choking. When was the last time you’ve cried like this? All you felt was sadness, betrayal, broken-heartedness, and embarrassment. How could this happen to you of all people?

“Don’t even think about returning a call. Whenever you decide to come the fuck home, maybe then we can talk. Goodbye. Hongjoong.” Forwarding the voicemail to him, you muted his texts and calls as you didn’t want to speak to him. Making it home, you unlocked the door, closing it aggressively behind you. You just wanted to take a shower and go to bed, not even wanting to think about what a horrendous Valentine’s this has been. You wish the day would be over, that you never would’ve had to experience it in the first place.

You replaced your shoes with your slippers at the door and made your way upstairs towards the bathroom, staring at yourself in the mirror. Your eyes were red and puffy from the countless breakdowns you had on your walk home. Dried-up mascara stained your cheeks, only making you frown at your bland expression. You signed and removed your coat, placing it on the counter. Walking to turn the shower faucet on, you daydreamed of what the date would’ve been like if he had just shown up as promised.

Buzz, buzz.

Your phone had interrupted your thoughts but quickly grabbed your attention as you hadn't received a notification in hours. You scurried over to it, seeing a phone call from an unsaved number, not even a recognizable one. Your gut told you to pick it up, you’re not sure why but that’s exactly what you did.

“Hello? Who’s this?”

There was silence on the other end for a moment making you question if it was a scammer. You rolled your eyes ready to hang up until a familiar voice responded softly.

“Hello..? Y/n? It’s me, San!”

Your eyes lit up a bit at hearing him. It gave you a slight sense of relief to hear someone after the day you’d been having. Even though it wasn’t the exact person you’ve been wanting to hear from, it was still better than nothing.

“San?! How did you get my number? And it’s almost 10 o’clock! What are you doing still up?”

“I’m surprised he even is up!”

You heard a faint yell in the back as a few snickers followed behind. San groaned as he began to bicker with the other body in the room.

“Wooyoung shut up! I can stay up past 9 just like you gu— yea yea I’m sure you can, sleeping beauty!”

More laughter began to be heard through the phone as Wooyoung cut San off mid-sentence to insult him. The young man groaned heavily as he excused himself from the call, everything going silent for a second. You were sure he muted himself just to scold his younger friend and others who laughed at him in the room. It made you wonder if Hongjoong too, was in that room with them. You heard a door slam as San began to take himself off of mute.

“Sorry about that, you know how much of a pain Woo is..”

You laughed a bit, feeling at ease while talking to San. San has always been the kindest out of all the members to you, all the others were nice but San always made sure you were okay. He went out of his way to help you out and talk to you whenever he could. You guys were practically best friends.

“Anyways, I’m just calling to check up on you.. are you alright?? Captain says he’s been trying to call you for the last 30 minutes and you weren’t answering..”

Your heart sunk a bit at hearing San mention Hongjoong. So he was still with them?! This entire time?! You stood silent for a bit as your thoughts of what to say ate away at you.

“I’m okay.” You responded coldly, feeling a welt of sadness beginning to wash over you once again. You weren’t sure how to relieve your pain to San and as much as you wanted to speak to Hongjoong, you knew you needed the space to prevent lashing out on him.

“Y/n? It’s okay, I already know what’s going on.”

You froze a bit, not sure of how to proceed as you heard a small sigh come from the other side of the phone. You swallowed the lump in your throat as nervousness washed over you, your hands becoming clammy. San cleared his throat before proceeding to speak to you.

“I know you may not wanna speak to Hyung right now, but you should come to the studio. He has something for you here.”

You groaned as you rolled your eyes, knowing you just wanted to be left alone for the rest of the night. The last thing you needed was to be reminded of what a beautiful Valentine’s this was.

“I don’t know Sannie. I kind of just want to be alone right now.”

“Please?? I promise you won’t regret it, and you won’t believe how incredibly sorry Hyung is right now... I’ve never seen him this sad..”

San’s words felt like a stab to your heart. He’s never been this sad? Anger left your body slowly, not only feeling drained from the day but yearning for Hongjoong. Maybe you went a bit overboard, maybe it was all a harmless mistake but at this time, it was too late to take anything you said back. You’ve never yelled or lashed out at Hongjoong as you did in the voicemail, and to know all 7 of his members heard it? You felt embarrassed for him.

“Sannie, I’m sorry. I just want to be alone. Tell Hongjoong I’ll be home. Goodnight.”

“I understand, goodnight y/n.”

The phone hung up and you felt your body ache. The amount of hurt you felt in your heart was too much to bear. You turned off the bathroom light and made your way downstairs to the couch, lying down on the cushions. You placed your phone on the table by the couch and closed your eyes. Tears slowly escaped them as you sniffed and sooner or later, your drained body took over, drifting you into a deep slumber.

Hongjoong got out of the car, thanking the driver for a safe ride home. He made eye contact with the members who traveled in this van with him, their eyes worrying about what awaited him at home. The silence remained for a moment when Seonghwa spoke up.

“Be gentle with her. Remember this has never happened in your relationship, let alone to her. She’s probably feeling little at the moment.”

Seonghwa gave a soft reassuring smile to Hongjoong, an agreeing nod being returned by the two other members in the vehicle. Hongjoong sighed as he smiled softly. “Thank you, Hyung. I appreciate the advice.” He waved goodbye to Seonghwa and the others as the driver closed the door, making his way back to the driver’s seat.

The car sped off and he began to open the door, closing it behind him as he placed his jacket on the coat hanger. The house was dark as if you were never home in the first place. He changed into his house slippers, quickly seeing you sleeping soundly on the couch with a small frown on your face.

Hongjoong’s heart sank as he witnessed the sight of you. How you didn’t even bother to change out of the clothes you wore for him today, how your dried-up mascara stained your cheeks. You were genuinely so hurt over his disappearance, especially when it never happened before. He admired what you picked out for him. It was a silky spaghetti-strapped black dress, with a small slit on the left side. He noticed your favorite pair of sparkly black heels by the door, about 4 inches high. All things he had gotten you the last few weeks, to wear for today.

Hongjoong walked over to you quietly, wrapping his arms under you he picked you up bridal style, beginning to carry you up the stairs to your shared bedroom. You hummed softly, still half asleep as you couldn’t register what was going on. He opened the door, softly placing you on your side of the bed and pulling the blanket over you. He left the room for a moment before returning with a warm wet rag and some of your makeup wipes. Kneeling beside your face, he softly wiped off any makeup you had left remaining being sure not to wake you up.

As he began to leave the room again, you opened your eyes, confused as to how you ended up in your bedroom. You turned your head towards the bathroom door, hearing the sound of a running faucet on. Sitting up, you began to wipe your eyes as Hongjoong re-entered the room, pausing when you too met eyes. He wore a pair of black slacks and a white button-down with the sleeves rolled up, followed by a dark blue tie hanging from the collar of his neck. He stood there frozen, not sure if the next few words he spoke would upset you once again.

“Mama, please I’m sorry. I swear I can explain,” he spoke softly, his hands beginning to fiddle with each other. He looked down at the ground, expecting only the worst from you after your voicemail. Your heart skipped a beat, not expecting him to reference your nickname even during the heart of an argument.

You sat silent for a second, unsure of what to say. As much as you wanted to be angry, you knew it wasn’t the answer. You could tell how heartbroken he was to hear how you reacted, to see you asleep on the couch still in your clothing. The last thing you wanted to do was put up a fight.

“Where have you been all this time??? We had planned this for weeks Jjoong, do you know how embarrassed I was??”

No words were shared between you two. Hongjoong made his way over to his desk, sitting in the roller chair. You glared at him for a moment, before slowly looking away. “I know, I seriously fucked up. Please just let me explain.” He looked at you with worried eyes, not sure of where to start his story but all he could feel was a sense of guilt dawning on him as he pleaded for your attention. You nodded softly, eyes reaching back to meet his, giving him your full attention.

“Yes, I was at the studio. My phone died while I was there and no one had a charger. I told Wooyoung to remind me when it hit 5:30 so that I could meet you at the restaurant.” He looked down at his business attire and sighed as he put his head in his hands.

“I was already changed by 3:30 in case, but time went by... Wooyoung forgot to tell me, which led me being caught up in our work for today. By the time San arrived, by the time I got a charger, I knew it was too late. I was wrong... it was an asshole move. You didn’t deserve to be blown off like that and I’m so sorry, Mama. You don’t even need to forgive me. Shit, I wouldn’t. I understand completely how wrong I was to do this to you. To even plan anything at all for today when it should’ve been about us.. about you..”

Silence began to engulf you both as you were left speechless by his confession and apology. He sighed softly as he went onto his computer, clicking away through apps and files until he stopped, facing you again.

“You don’t have to say anything, Mama. It’s okay,” He smiled at you softly, brushing his black hair back out of his eyes. “This is what we worked on today. This is why I got so caught up in the studio..” He pats the bedside next to him, gesturing for you to come sit by him. You furrowed your eyebrows at him, rolling your eyes.

“Jjoong, what does this have to do with what we’re talking about right now??”

He shook his head and continued to pat the bed. “Please... it’s for you.” You sighed and scooted by him as he began to hit play on the track. It was a slower song, something you normally weren’t used to when it came to his writing. As the lyrics began to play, you noticed familiar writing within the song. You looked up at him, his eyes remaining closed as he began to feel like one with the song.

That’s when it hit you. Notes from your letters. They were small lines taken from letters that you had sent Hongjoong when you were abroad for college. Lines expressing your love for him, how much you had missed him and wished to hold him in your arms. How the stars in the sky reminded you of him, twinkling so brightly on the clearest days.

You felt tears began to swell in your eyes as every lyric began to hit sentimentally. Hongjoong looked up as he began to hear your sniffles and pulled your arm to sit in his lap. He held you tightly as you cried into his shoulder, apologizing repeatedly for lashing out at him earlier. He rubbed your back slowly, reassuring you over and over that it was okay and he deserved to know how upset you were with him.

The song hit you in a way that you’d never think of. To know Hongjoong had spent his entire afternoon composing and recording this song for you? Making sure the members sang every part exactly how he wanted to please you. How could you continue to be angry with him after this?

“Jjoong—”

He shushed you and held you tighter, resting his head against yours. He planted a soft kiss on your forehead, apologizing once more. “Don’t say anything Mama, you did nothing wrong. I hope you liked the song... I spent weeks working on this for your gift, even if the day went wrong.”

You looked up at him, your eyes meeting as you smiled softly. You nodded, nuzzling your nose against his own. You placed a small kiss on his cheek, bringing your thumb up to caress it slowly. “Words can’t explain how much I loved it. Thank you.”

Hongjoong returned a smile to you, placing his hand on top of your own on his face. He gazed into your eyes for a second, taking in this precious moment he had with you. One he wouldn’t trade for the world, not even a stupid Valentine’s dinner.

“What’s the song called?” You mumbled softly, hand still placed on his cheek as your cocked your head to him. He closed his eyes, his smiling widening.

“Star 1117.”

Your eyes lit up at this, realizing the small reference in the title. 11/17, the day you guys officially started dating. Star simply for the meaning of guidance, as sailors used it to guide their way through the oceans. To you personally, it was also what you had nicknamed Hongjoong. You saw him as your star, always shining even through the cloudiest of days in the sky. He was your guidance in this game called life and you couldn’t be any less grateful for him.

“Want to know my favorite lyric? Something you wrote for me?” You nodded at his words, eager whenever he talked about his lyrical logic.

“I will protect you forever, and forever you are my star..”

divider creds: @cafekitsune

A/N: i thought the meaning for Star 1117 was so cute, I had to incorporate it into this somehow. :’) *updated Seonghwa's part is now out!*

Tag list:@skzline @evidive @kittykat-25 @amuromio @xoxkii @losrpark @classyrbf @sundaybossanova @owmoiralover @vrtualsins @sanslovesblog

*comment to be part of future taglists!*

#—♡vampzity #—♡︎vamp’s soft hours #ateez #ateez fanfic #kpop #atiny #ateez x reader #ateez atiny #hongjoong #hongjoong x reader #oneshot #ateez oneshot #valentines day #angst with a happy ending #light angst #fluff

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just-aake · 1 year ago

Text

Boundless Devotion - Part III

Pairing: princess!Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

Summary: MedievalAU. Natasha is the eldest princess of the Romanov Kingdom. As the time of her coronation approaches, she is suddenly forced to make a decision – either find herself a partner or her parents will choose one for her.

Warnings: slight angst, slight fluff

Words: 4537

A picnic basket rests atop a carefully spread blanket on the ground in the shade of a large lakeside tree.

In the distance, two dogs chase and play with each other, darting through the grass.

A noblewoman sits comfortably on the blanket while watching as the two princesses of the kingdom engage in a friendly competition by the water's edge.

At one point, the eldest princess casually provides some new information, causing the seated individual to shoot up in surprise.

“You said what?!” Kate’s voice echoes in the clearing.

Unfazed by her outburst, Natasha calmly picks up a smooth stone and hurls it into the lake. The stone skips across the water's surface several times before coming to a stop with a satisfying plop.

“I had to do something,” she explains.

A look of confusion and concern crosses Kate's face as she tries to make sense of the situation.

"But now your mother thinks you're in a relationship,” Kate says before panically stressing, “A relationship that doesn't exist."

With a smug tone, Yelena points her finger at Natasha and comments, “I told you — your plan sucks.”

She effortlessly catches the stone that Natasha throws at her, playfully sticking out her tongue at her sister, and then tosses it into the lake. The stone skips across the water, falling just one skip short of Natasha’s score.

Groaning at her loss, Yelena returns to the blanket and flops down beside Kate with a disappointed huff.

In consolation for her defeat, Kate hands a sandwich to the younger princess before asking about the other significant flaw in her plan.

“So when are you going to tell Y/n?”

At her question, Natasha stares out at the water, lost in thought, as she contemplates her answer.

Considering the lengths you go through to avoid her, just getting you to meet her will be difficult, much less telling you about her plan.

Natasha never imagined there would be a point in her life where one of her biggest problems would be just getting you to talk to her.

She lets out a sad sigh at the reminder, absently kicking the rocks on the ground into the water as she tries to come up with an idea to see you.

“Natasha Alianovna Romanov!”

At the sound of your voice, Natasha snaps her head up and turns around. She spots you in the distance stomping towards her, your face frowning in anger.

Confused and surprised at your sudden appearance, Natasha tilts her head curiously as she watches you approach.

"Y/n?" she whispers under her breath in disbelief.

Yelena chuckles amusedly behind her, teasing, “I think she’s already heard the news.”

When you finally stop in front of Natasha, you poke her in the shoulder with an accusatory tone.

“You! Why am I hearing that you’re saying we’re—��

You stop, noticing the other two on the blanket behind Natasha watching the interaction with rapt attention.

Lowering your voice, you finish your question in a whispered hiss, “—you’re saying that we’re together, romantically?”

Despite your anger directed at her, a small smile breaks through Natasha's face at the sight of you and at the fact that you're speaking to her casually, just like you used to do.

Before Natasha can answer, Yelena calls out to you in reassurance.

“Don’t worry, Y/n, we already know about your fake relationship with my sister.”

Hearing this, you place your hands on your hips and turn to her with a glare, redirecting your anger to the younger princess.

“And you just went along with it?”

Unfazed, Yelena just shrugs her shoulders in response as she takes another bite of her sandwich.

When your gaze shifts over accusingly to Kate, she raises her hands in a defensive gesture.

“I only found out about it recently.”

You throw your hands up in disbelief.

“Great! Who else knows?”

Natasha is about to respond when she catches a glimpse of bandages peeking out from under your arm sleeve.

Frowning, she reaches out and takes your hand gently to bring it closer to her in examination.

“What happened to your wrist?” she asks in concern.

When you realize what she was referring to, you pull your hand back quickly, tugging down your sleeve to conceal the bandages.

“It’s nothing,” you reply, shifting your eyes away from her.

“That doesn’t look like nothing,” Natasha remarks as she tries to take another look.

You hide your arms behind your back, dodging Natasha’s hand.

“It’s fine," you insist stubbornly. "There was just a small accident at the stables yesterday.”

Kate gives you a confused look before commenting, “I thought you said you were going to rest yesterday.”

Natasha raises her eyebrows at the information and turns back to you accusingly, having caught you in a lie.

You respond with a resolute shake of your head, giving her a firm glare.

“No, you owe me an explanation for what’s going on first.”

Yelena interrupts the conversation with a sharp clap, brushing away the remaining crumbs on her hands, and stands up, pulling the unsuspecting Kate with her.

“Come on, Kate, let’s leave these two to resolve their little lover’s quarrel.”

“But–!” Kate cries out in disappointment. She is pulled away before she can protest anymore, leaving Natasha and you alone.

Rolling your eyes at Yelena’s choice of words, you cross your arms and look at Natasha expectantly.

Natasha lets out a resigned sigh, rubbing her head exhaustedly at the memory of her mother’s proposition.

“I need to be in a relationship by the time of my coronation or else my parents will choose someone for me.”

You scoff in disbelief at her explanation.

“Natasha, you can easily get anyone in this kingdom to fall for you,” you say pointedly. “Why did you need to involve me?”

Natasha gestures to you in an obvious manner.

“Because you were the first person that I thought of who would go along with my plan.”

That was partially true.

Honestly, when Natasha was told she needed to have someone by her side, the only person that came to mind whom she trusted enough was you.

You frown at her in confusion as you ask.

"What plan?"

Natasha places her hands on your shoulders, giving you a serious look as she explains.

“We just need to pretend until after my coronation. Once it’s over, we can just tell them that it didn’t work out and that we’re better off as friends.”

“And if they still decide to choose someone else for you then?” you point out.

Natasha shrugs nonchalantly, replying confidently, “Then at least I’ll have some power to reject their choice after I become queen.”

She gives you a pleading look.

“I just need your help until then.”

Rubbing your forehead uneasily, you contemplate the choices in your mind.

If you don’t help Natasha, she will be forced into a relationship that she doesn’t want. However, if you do accept, it means you'll have to spend most of your time with her, which is something you've been avoiding all year, to maintain the charade of the two of you as a couple.

Noticing the conflicting emotions on your face and sensing your hesitation, Natasha tilts her head to meet your gaze and calls your name to capture your attention.

“Hey, you don’t have to decide right now,” her voice is gentle and understanding, as she tries to relieve the pressure that she realized she had put on you.

“Look, there is going to be a ball tonight to appease the other noble families for the canceled meetings and—”

“I’m not in the mood for socializing, Natasha,” you interject with a frustrated exhale.

“Just…take some time to think it over,” she continues.

Her voice is calm and soothing to the conflicted thoughts in your head.

“Come to the ball tonight, and let me know your decision then,” she offers.

You lower your head as you consider her words, still conflicted about the matter.

Natasha's hand gently lifts your face, directing your gaze back to her.

“I’m not going to force you, Y/n,” Natasha asserts sincerely. “If you decide you don’t want to do it, I’ll tell my mother the truth. But having you there may help.”

She nods at you confidently, commenting, “Maybe you can change her mind or something. She has always liked you.”

With a resigned sigh, you give in, feeling the tension in your shoulders ease slightly.

“Fine, I’ll think about it,” you concede, your tone carrying a hint of resignation.

However, you follow your agreement by poking her shoulder again, this time with a warning tone.

“But there better not be any more surprises.”

When Natasha acknowledges your words with a nod and a promise evident in her eyes, you turn around to leave, walking toward where you left your horse earlier.

Natasha follows quickly after you when she sees where you’re going, calling out to you.

“Hold on, Y/n! You can’t ride back with that injury.”

You glance at the princess who is now walking beside you, raising your brow at her.

“I came here, didn’t I?”

Natasha rolls her eyes at your words.

“Recklessly, you could have fallen off,” she chastises.

As you reach your horse, you untie the reins from its tether and shoot her an exasperated look.

“I’ll be fine, Natasha,” you reassure her.

Natasha takes hold of the reins in your hand and moves to block your path, giving you a knowing look.

"Don't be stubborn," she says, her tone carrying a teasing challenge.

The two of you lock in an intense stare as you both wait for the other to back down. Natasha’s gaze is steady and unwavering as she looks at you.

You recognize that determined expression. Whenever Natasha has that look, she is never backing down from whatever challenge is in front of her.

After a moment passes without any change, you sigh in defeat, releasing the reins to Natasha. Her lips curve into a small smile at your pout.

“Come on, let me help you up, and we can go together. Does that work?” she compromises.

You relent with a nod in agreement.

She helps you get up onto the saddle without too much strain on your arm and makes sure that you are safely secured on top of the horse.

As Natasha prepares to pull herself up, a frown creases her brow when she notices the family crest on the horse.

"This is Lady Maria's horse," she observes, looking up at you curiously. "Why do you have it?"

“I was meeting with her this afternoon for tea,” you reply.

Natasha's eyebrows furrow even more as she recalls Steve mentioning in passing how Maria had recently started looking for a partner.

“You mean like a date?” she asks.

You shrug, not noticing Natasha’s change of expression.

“I guess,” you answer honestly. “We just agreed to meet and talk with each other at the moment.”

Natasha hums in response, absently patting the horse to distract herself from the slight tightness that suddenly appeared in her chest.

“And how did it go?” she asks in a casual tone, appearing nonchalant.

“It was going well, up until the part where I found out I was already in a relationship,” you remind her with a pointed look.

The tightness in her chest disappears at your words, and an unexpected wave of relief sweeps over her.

She dismisses the feeling, assuming that she's simply glad that you were speaking to her again in the familiar way that you used to.

With a chuckle, Natasha finally pulls herself up and positions herself behind you. Her hands move around you to hold the reins, enclosing you in her arms.

Moving the reins, Natasha signals the horse to start walking in the direction of your manor.

Your body instinctively relaxes against her front as her familiar comforting warmth envelops you instantly.

The two of you share a comfortable silence, accompanied by the rhythmic sound of the horse’s galloping as you head home.

After a few moments, you feel Natasha resting her chin on your shoulder before she asks softly, “Are you finally going to tell me what really happened to your wrist now?”

Instinctively, you touch your injured arm, caressing it gently. It was still sore from yesterday.

Given Natasha's protective nature, you knew she wasn't going to let it go now that she had already seen it.

Thankfully, it was easier to lie when you were not looking directly at her face.

“I was trying to cook something, and I ended up with a small burn,” you say under your breath.

Natasha lets out an amused huff at your words.

“I thought we agreed that you’re not allowed to cook again after you almost burned down the castle’s kitchen.”

You gasp in disbelief and outrage, turning your face to the side to look at her.

“That was your fault! You were supposed to watch the fire.”

Natasha chuckles softly in relief at the familiar banter. It really did feel good to have you talk with her like this again. She had missed this friendly closeness between you and her.

If you notice her slowing down the pace of the horse, you don’t say anything.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

Arriving at the entrance of your manor with Natasha, Pietro's eyes widen in surprise at the sight of the two of you together.

When you see he is about to comment about it, you give him a pointed look.

He closes his mouth shut at your expression and instead, focuses on helping you down from the horse.

Your feet have barely touched the ground before you are pulled to the side.

Wanda turns you in multiple directions as she examines you.

“I can’t believe you just left like that!” she reprimands. “And you didn’t even tell Lady Maria about your injury before borrowing her horse.”

Pietro joins in with his sister when he hears of your actions, exclaiming, “What are you thinking, riding a horse with your hand like that?”

You try to calm them down, insisting you are okay.

Natasha chuckles at the interactions between the three of you, glad to see that you have others close by who also care about your well-being.

Wanda’s chastising pause in surprise at the sight of the princess, whom she hadn’t noticed initially due to her intense focus on you. She offers a curtsy in greeting before firmly nudging her brother’s side to make him bow.

Natasha acknowledges them with a nod and gestures towards you.

“Please look after her and make sure she doesn’t do anything else reckless,” she requests.

At her words, you gasp in indignation.

Natasha smiles at your expression before adding softly, “I’ll see you tonight, Y/n.”

You give her a begrudging nod in acknowledgment, replying with a sincere tone.

“Thank you, Natasha, for bringing me home.”

She gives you a satisfied smile in response before nudging the horse to turn and go.

After Natasha leaves, Wanda turns to you in shock, exclaiming, “So, is it true? You and the princess? I’d understand if you didn’t want to tell us.”

Pietro huffs in disbelief, remarking, “Speak for yourself, Wanda. I, for one, would be very offended if you hid this from us.”

You roll your eyes fondly at the two of them before reminding them, “Not the place to talk about this, you two,” with your eyes glancing at the shadows where your father’s guards may be lurking.

The three of you reach your room without interruption this time. The moment you close the door, Wanda begins questioning you.

“So, are you and the princess together?”

Before you can respond, Pietro interjects with an excited clap, “It’s about time, honestly. I wagered a lot of coin over the years on the two of you ending up together.”

You blink at his words in surprise, too shocked and confused to speak.

Why would he think you and Natasha would ever get together?

Wanda slaps Pietro on the shoulder in reprimand, “I thought I told you to stop gambling away your money!”

In response, Pietro quickly moves away from his sister and hides behind you like a shield. He points at his twin accusingly.

“Like you weren’t hoping for them to happen too! At least this way I’ll also get something from the good news.”

You decide to clear up the misunderstanding and interrupt their sibling bickering, raising your hands in a stopping gesture before declaring, “There is no news! Natasha and I are not together.”

The twins stare at you in silence, waiting for further explanation.

You rub your head tiredly as you explain vaguely, “The situation is just complicated right now."

Pietro curses under his breath in response to your words, while Wanda’s shoulders slump in disappointment.

Deciding to change the subject, Wanda asks sadly, “So, what’s happening tonight?” referring to the last statement from the princess.

“A ball at the castle,” you tell her.

Wanda’s mood lifts immediately at your words, and she dashes to your closet excitedly, pulling out different dresses and laying them out on your bed.

With Wanda occupied, you turn to Pietro who is still hiding behind you. There is a stench that you didn’t notice before coming from the other twin.

“Why do you…,” you trail off, covering your nose slightly as you try to find a polite way to phrase your words.

Pietro sighs angrily, moving away and wiping at his clothes as if to brush off the disgusting smell.

“Your father tasked me with cleaning out the stables before he left this morning,” he explains.

You give him a confused look.

“Where was Cedric?” you ask, referring to the manor’s stable master who, along with his wife, has been a part of the staff since you were a child.

Wanda and Pietro exchange uncertain glances before Wanda decides to explain.

“Your father has been firing some of the older staff, replacing most of the guards with his soldiers, and assigning more duties to those remaining.”

Your eyes widen in horror at the news.

Since your mother died when you were a baby and with your father frequently away, it was mostly the staff members who essentially raised you since you were young.

They weren’t just workers.

They were your family.

And now you hear that your father is dismissing them from your home.

A sense of powerlessness washes over you as you realize your inability to do anything to protect them from your father's actions.

Seeing your expression, Wanda takes your hand gently and offers a comforting smile. She gives you a dress and changes the subject in an attempt to distract you from your distressing thoughts.

“Let’s get you ready for tonight.”

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

Fidgeting with your dress, you stand by yourself in the grand ballroom of the castle. You can feel the stares from the other nobles as they point and whisper to each other.

The rumor of your supposed relationship with Natasha has already traveled across the kingdom by the time of the ball.

However, with the additional news of your father's actions against the staff, you were too distracted to think about Natasha’s proposal.

Even now, you are unsure of your decision.

Awkwardly shuffling around under their stares, you find no friendly faces to distract yourself. It seems that Yelena has not shown up yet, and if the younger princess isn’t here, chances are Kate is with her at the moment too.

Meanwhile, you assume the large crowd at the front of the ballroom is where Natasha is currently located, being mobbed by other nobles trying to gain favor.

Among the crowd of people, you can vaguely make out her dark red hair.

Almost as if sensing your gaze on her, she turns her body in your direction.

Your eyes are about to meet hers when, suddenly, a golden cup is shoved in front of your face, blocking your view of her.

You recoil back in surprise.

When you see the person at the end of the extended arm, you internally groan in annoyance.

Though you manage to force out a polite smile, your facial expression can barely hold back from grimacing a little.

Pushing away the cup with the back of your hand and rejecting the offered drink, you greet the other noble in front of you.

“Good evening, Lord Rumlow,” you manage to muster out, sounding somewhat neutral.

Lord Brock Rumlow is the only son of another distinguished noble family in the kingdom. His house is renowned for its affiliations with mercenaries and the weapons trade.

The noble himself, however, is known for his arrogant, ruthless, and relentless personality in all that he does.

Unfortunately, you have found yourself as a part of one of his many pursuits.

Despite years of rejecting his advances and rebuffing his flirtations, his interest in you remains steadfast and annoyingly persistent.

Ignorant of your discomfort at his presence, Rumlow takes a leisurely sip from the cup you refused as his eyes roam over you with unwarranted confidence.

“My dear Y/n, I was hoping for a chance to speak with you.”

Your face involuntarily twitches in disgust at his words, and you quickly raise your hand, stopping him.

“I have to regretfully decline, Lord Rumlow. There are matters elsewhere that require my attention.”

With a forced smile, you pivot to make a swift exit.

His voice calls out to you, halting your movements.

"I sincerely hope the whispers concerning you and the princess are false,” he says before continuing ominously. “It would be a shame if we lost the opportunity that your father was hoping for us.”

Your brows furrow at his words, and you turn around slowly to face him again.

“What do you mean?” you ask hesitantly.

A satisfied smirk tugs at the corner of his lips as he calmly spins the cup in his hand, swirling the liquid inside.

“Your father seemed intrigued at the possibility of a union between our two families when I presented the idea to him yesterday at our meeting.”

He can’t be serious.

You can’t believe his audacity to suggest such a thing to your father.

Anger bristles in you at the thought of being forced into a marriage with him through your father.

Just as you are about to reprimand him, you freeze at the terrifying realization.

Your father has always valued power above everything. If marrying you to Rumlow gives him any advantage, he would take the chance immediately without any consideration to you.

And if he does arrange a marriage for you, would you even be able to do anything to stop it? You can't even protect the staff members from his decisions.

As the thoughts run through your mind, Lord Rumlow extends his hand toward your face, as if he were about to pet one of his possessions.

You want to move away, but you can’t, your body frozen at the scary realization of how powerless you are against your father.

Suddenly, a familiar and warm presence appears from behind you as a hand rests against your arm, gently pulling you back against her side.

Looking back, you find Natasha now standing next to you, her eyes glaring at the man in front of you.

“I hope I’m not interrupting,” she says calmly, but you can hear the hint of warning and anger underneath her tone.

Rumlow's hand curls into a fist and returns to his side as his smile twitches downward slightly at the arrival of the princess.

“Not at all, your Highness,” he responds, his tone dripping with fake politeness. He gestures to you.

“I was just telling Lady Y/n how excited I am for her future.”

Shifting his attention back to you, his polite grin morphs into a more sinister expression.

“I do hope we get a chance to speak again, Lady Y/n.”

With a curt half-bow directed at Natasha, he turns away from the two of you and disappears into the crowd.

Natasha's face twists in disgust as he leaves before commenting, “You’d think he would leave you alone after how many times you’ve rejected him.”

When you don’t answer, she turns to look at you and finds your face drained of color.

Immediately, Natasha moves to stand in front of you, her hands gently cradling your face as she examines you worriedly.

“Hey, what’s wrong? You look like you’re about to be sick.”

Your hands instinctively grab hers, stopping her examination and guiding her hands back down to hang between your bodies. Her familiar touch helps to clear your mind a little from the paralyzing fear as traces of energy return to you.

Letting out a shaky breath, you reassure her, “I’m fine. Just a little exhausted from being blindsided by all the different news today.”

Natasha tilts her head at you curiously as she waits for you to explain further.

That’s when you notice the sudden crowd subtly gathering around the two of you, their bodies leaning closer as if to eavesdrop on your conversation.

Rolling your eyes at the intrusiveness of the other nobles, you firmly grasp Natasha’s hand and guide her to a relatively vacant area on the dance floor.

Natasha’s other hand naturally falls to your waist as she takes the lead, bringing both of you into a slow dance.

“You were saying?” she asks.

“My father might consider arranging a marriage between me and Lord Rumlow.”

Natasha stops in her tracks, exclaiming, “What?! He can’t do that!”

You give her a deadpan look, raising an eyebrow at her, before pointing out, “Natasha, your parents are also pushing you to have a relationship. I think the answer of whether or not our parents can meddle in our romantic lives is pretty obvious.”

You continue sadly, “The difference is — at least you have more of a choice.”

Natasha lets out a frustrated curse at the unfairness of your situation.

Tired of all the new revelations, you rest your head against her shoulder with a sigh.

The two of you resume the dance, swaying slowly as the atmosphere around you two grows somber.

Suddenly, your head shoots up at a thought, and you give her a meaningful look.

“Natasha, your plan — the one where we pretend to be a couple.”

She tilts her head curiously in question.

“How does that help you?”

“If it’s you, my father can’t argue that Lord Rumlow would be the better option for me to be with,” you reason.

There’s no question which is the more advantageous arrangement between a lord versus the princess and heir to the kingdom.

Her eyes search yours to see how serious you are before asking sincerely, “Are you certain about this?”

You nod decisively, replying, “I’m sure, Natasha.”

Seeing your resolve, Natasha returns your nod with one of her own, saying, "Okay, I guess we're together then."

Afterward, you furrow your brows in contemplation as you consider the next step.

“So, how do we go about officially announcing our new relationship?”

Natasha glances around, observing the obvious stares from other nobles toward the two of you, and suddenly, a teasing expression forms on her face.

“I have an idea,” she says with a smirk.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

Series Masterlist : Boundless Devotion

a/n: Thank you for reading!

Taglist: @lightwhoranoutoflight, @taliiiaasteria, @romanoffprentiss, @canvascoloredin, @silentwolfsstuff, @blacklightsposts, @arcturusseer, @presser24, @dvrkhcld, @jujuu23, @screechcat, @vivs46

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff fanfic #black widow x reader #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff

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sbdskate · 1 year ago

Text

Laws Of Attraction (Part 8) - DR x lawyer!fem!reader

Summary: McLaren is in breach of contract, dr3 hires a lawyer to deal with the aftermath. Tropes ensue. Slow burn. Enemies (kind of)-> Friends/colleagues -> Lovers

Pairing: lawyer!fem!reader x Daniel Ricciardo

Warnings: fluff, fluff, fluff, language, slight angst, alcohol consumption, McLaren, bad jokes

Word Count: 4,277

A/N: I tried out some different writing styles this chapter and candidly, I’m not sure it’s my best work. There are more scenes from DR’s perspective and I found out that writing race dialogue is very difficult. I tried to stay true to the actual Abu Dhabi 2022. Please bear with me through this chapter, feedback of any kind is always appreciated. Please, thank you, and enjoy!

When you arrived at the paddock, Daniel was still distracting himself by taking pictures of literally everything, including the ground. You let him be though, no matter how silly it seemed. The last thing he needed was to psych himself out before the race. As you approached, the McLaren PR crew was already waiting with cameras to get content for the last Unboxed video of the season which was your cue to peel off.

“How are you feeling?” you asked hesitantly, making sure to keep an appropriate distance from your client.

“Honestly, I’m fine. Maybe I’ll feel different once the suit’s on, but right now I’m good.”

“You’ll let me know if you need anything, right?” He caught the seriousness in your tone and found it endearing you were being so protective of him. It seemed you were more nervous than he was.

“Actually, hold on,” he stopped walking.

“What? Is everything alright? Oh-” *click* “Daniel!” He laughed at your disgruntled expression as he lowered the camera.

“I’m fine, promise. I’ll see you after the race.” He gave you a polite pat on the shoulder as he began to walk away, but you grabbed his arm before he was out of reach and pulled him in for a big hug before you could second guess yourself. He didn’t think twice as he wrapped his arms around you. You quickly released him, reinstating the arm’s length between you.

“Good luck today, you’re going to do great,” you said as you composed yourself. He walked backwards continuing your extended goodbye, unable to look away from you.

“I know,” he said, with a cocky smile plastered on his face. *click*

You snorted, your stoicism overpowered by his charm. You waved one last time as a sendoff before he disappeared into McLaren hospitality.

As usual with race day, it was a lot of hurry up and wait. Daniel exchanged helmets with Lando and Zhou, sat for photos with the team, sat for photos with the grid. He tried to take in every detail. He laughed when he walked in the garage and saw his mechanics donning cowboy hats embroidered with “yee-haw thanks DR” and the outline of him doing a shoey.

Everyone seemed to think he would be walking around as though he were attending his own funeral, but for the moment he felt he didn’t have much to be sad about. He needed a break – from the spotlight, from McLaren, from training, from racing in general, and there was no shame in that. In twelve hours that break would become a reality, and that was something to be very happy about.

When it came time to change into his race suit, he waited with baited breath for the garment to exert some kind of magical force over him. He stood in his drivers room waiting for the tears, or nerves, or something. Everyone told him it would hit him when he put the suit on. But he examined himself in the mirror, widened his stance and put his hands on his hips. Power pose. No, he was still the same Daniel Ricciardo, despite what people tried to tell him. And this was just another race.

It was less than ideal starting P13 due to a three-place grid penalty carried over from the Brazilian Grand Prix after his run-in with Yuki, but Daniel pushed aside all the growing frustrations as he waited eagerly for the lights to change, feeling his pulse sync with the idled roar of the engine. The few seconds before the race played out in slow motion, as they always did. The rest of the pressures of the moment faded away as he focused on what was in front of him, ready to react. He was at peace, and allowed himself to feel the overwhelming therapeutic emptiness. Five. Four. Three. Two. One.

And it’s lights out and away we go!

He survived the first lap shuffle and chaos, but lost a position to Lance. There was still plenty of race left though, and his goal first and foremost was a clean race without a DNF. Making it through the first few clustered laps unscathed was step one. Once the pack started to disperse, he began his grueling climb back to the points.

Here comes Daniel Ricciardo on the inside of Schumacker, gaining a place back.

It was lonely for a while. He extended his lead from Mick, but couldn’t seem to fully catch up to Lance. Lance pitted on lap 14, as expected with mediums if going for a two-stop strategy, allowing Daniel to gain a position. It subsequently opened up the floodgates, others shortly following suit bringing Daniel up to P8. He knew he would have to pit eventually, but if he could just nurse this set a bit longer and maintain this position as long as possible, he had a shot to finish in the points.

Lap 18, Daniel Ricciardo still hasn’t pitted yet.

Even in the last race, it shouldn’t have surprised him that McLaren would try to short stick him one last time. Good riddance he would be done with this circus in an hour. George passed him, as he expected in better machinery and on fresher tires.

He finally pitted on lap 20, switching to hards. The team did a great job with a 2.3 second pit stop but he came out in P18. He had a job to do, it was time to get to work.

Daniel Ricciardo, down in 18th place. Making some overtakes and having a bit of fun. Makes a lovely move on Kevin Magnusson going into Turn 9.

In quick succession, he picked off Mick and Bottas, Seb pitted, and somehow Alonso DNF’d. Before he knew it, he was back to where he started in P13.

Fernando Alonso has not had the best of luck, our first retirement of this evening. Mechanical failure. That is a real shame for him, real shame. Meanwhile, here comes Sebastian Vettel! Haven’t said that in a while. Very nice move on Pierre Gasly.

News at Alpine that there’s some water leak, that was why they had to pull Fernando in. He feels the unreliability there has cost him nearly seventy points during the course of this season. Since he came back to Formula One, well, the reunion with Alpine then Renault has ended in retirement. Sad for all parties. And this means that Fernando Alonso has been beaten by his teammate, Esteban Ocon. But I’ll tell you a bit more about that later, as Daniel Ricciardo manages to get past the Alfa Romeo of Zhou Guanou.

He encroached on Alex, smelling blood in the water. Even though Alex nicked the wall, he maintained the position longer than he thought. He had to respect the work the kid was doing in that tractor trailer of a Williams. The track conditions were cooling as the sun set, making it difficult to regulate the temperature of the tires.

Daniel Ricciardo trying down the inside there on Alex Albon. Now you saw what happened in Mexico when he tried that on an unsuspecting Yuki Tsunoda and they came together, but this time around they managed to keep apart. But uh, for McLaren they need to start clearing a few cars here. Norris is seventh. Ricciardo out of the points. Albon now pits.

He wished he could have overtaken Alex properly, but he wasn’t complaining as he gained another position. The second stoppers continued, moving his way up to P9. He could breathe a bit now that he was officially in the points. But it was short lived as his friend, former teammate, and mentor had popped up in his rearview, more than two seconds behind, but quickly closing the gap. There were still fifteen laps requiring him to preserve the tires while defending his position.

Sebastian Vettel is gaining a bit on Daniel Ricciardo in tenth place. Ten laps to go.

He almost missed the second Aston Martin in his rearview as Lance passed both of them. He shared Seb’s frustration that they were the sacrificial lambs of their respective teams testing out the one-stop strategy. He was still in the points for now, but Seb was an admirable adversary and with only seven laps left in the race he would not take the position for granted. With officially one second between them, he had to push. They were both on very old tires, but Seb’s were younger.

The two leavees, Ricciardo and Vettel. Vettel’s closing in on Ricciardo, and he’s going to get him in the next lap or so if the current pace keeps up. Five laps to go in the Formula One season, 2022.

And oh my God, what’s this? Hydraulic problem for Hamilton, as you can see as Carlos Sainz passes Lewis who’s still stuck in seventh gear! This might be curtains for Lewis Hamilton this evening. He’s got it down into fifth gear – oh. Oh no, this is disappointing.

As was the nature of racing, he wasn’t going to question his adversary’s misfortune. With a mechanical failure taking Lewis out, he moved back into P9. He was so close to the finish line he could taste it, but Seb was still less than a second behind.

The final lap. He saw the fireworks go off for Max, but he couldn’t lose focus.

Daniel Ricciardo under immense pressure from Sebastian Vettel. This is going to go all the way to the wire.

There’s twelve million dollars on Sebastian Vettel trying to overtake Daniel Ricciardo here, twelve million dollars if they can get extra points at Aston Martin to see if they can get above Alfa Romeo in the Constructor’s Championship. Is it Ricciardo or Vettel? Nineth or tenth? Both drivers leaving as of the end of this season. Ricciardo potentially to go as a reserve driver at Red Bull. Sebastian Vettel waving goodbye to Formula One and giving us thrills and excitement right to the checkered flag! Is he going to get past Daniel Ricciardo? It’s going to be close!

Ricciardo takes that nineth place, Sebastian Vettel scores tenth in his final race! And well, what did he say? “Remember these times, they might not last forever.” Sebastian, thank you. The memories definitely will.

Daniel's jaw unclenched to let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in that moved his whole chest, shoulders relaxing. He barely had time to process what he had just accomplished when his engineers came on the radio.

“Yes mate, P9. Good job. Finished in the points. Good stuff, good stuff.”

“Cheers guys, that was, uh, that was fun at the end. Think we did well to hold him off, well done. That was good.”

“Great race buddy. Great overtaking, that was a proper Honey Badger show, that was good.”

He bit his tongue. He could only be so pleasant to the people who had diminished his confidence over the last two years. Having officially crossed the finish line of his last race, he would remain polite and cordial but didn’t feel the need to suck up to them more than he needed to.

“Daniel, could I have Purple Default 64X. And if you could go back to Purple C1.”

He did as he was told, unphased by the short radio congratulations. He was pleasantly surprised, however, when a picture of his win at Monza last year popped up with the rest of the team. The memory of that day came flooding back and the feelings that went along with it. The triumph he finally felt. The renewed sense of hope for what may come with the rest of his tenure with McLaren. The Daniel in the picture had no idea he would basically be kicked out of the sport he loved so much in less than a year. He had no idea he would fall out of love with it, even as he was just starting to get his groove back.

“That’s cool,” he chuckled. “That’s really nice, thank you guys.”

“Cheers buddy. It’s been an honor, Daniel. It’s been an honor, really great good two years.” He hated the lump he felt in his throat. “I know we haven’t always had the results we’ve wanted, but we’ve had some pretty good ones along the way. And uh, I think I speak for everyone on the team when I say how much we’ve all enjoyed working with you.” He swallowed thickly, praying no one had eyes on the front facing camera in the car.

“Yeah, appreciate your efforts. Thank you…Alright, it’s nice to finish in the points. Well done guys. Thank you.” He did his best to switch the conversation back to race at hand, taking away the focus of the gravity and finality of the situation. Looking at it in isolation, away from the totality of the last two years, it was a good race. He continued to drive and wave around the track, doing some donuts here and there, but the gestures felt empty.

“Ok, so into the pit lane, and when you turn the engine off then go to P0. Kill the car and switch everything off.” The back of his eyes began to sting. Switch everything off.

“Understood. Uh, alright guys.” There was so much he wanted to say but he was never good with words, especially not at this moment. “Thank you. I think you know…how much I appreciate your efforts over the last two years. So… thank you.” He tried to keep his tone steady, but felt his voice crack. “And thanks for this display, on Purple C64. Cheers.”

“Yeah, 03 we weren’t really able to use I’m afraid.” He knew the engineers were only talking about the mechanical configurations, but the words felt like a gut punch. They were done with him. There was nothing more that needed to be said.

The feelings he had waited for all day, the ones everyone expected, suddenly hit him like an avalanche. He wanted to get out of the car desperately, but couldn’t do so when he was a mess like this. It was probably the last time for the rest of the night that he would have any time to be by himself with just his thoughts. It was done – and he realized again after taking a few moments to compose himself, maybe for now that was a good thing. What was it Seb had said?

“There are a lot more important things than racing in circles.”

He jumped out of the car, feeling the impact of the gravel below his feet. He stretched his limbs, finally free from the confines of the cockpit and was hit by a wave of relief that washed over him. He was free from expectations, restrictive diets, constant jet lag. Free from McLaren. All he had to do was get into his ugly orange team kit one last time for post-race interviews. He knew he would be asked hard questions, about his past and his future, but he was ready. He had nothing to be ashamed of, and if anything, had many things to be proud of. You’re the only driver to have won in that brick of a car in the last ten years you constantly reminded him. He finished the season on a high, including a great race battle with Seb. He was done hiding, done minimizing.

So he went from interview to interview, unafraid to be honest with himself and the world. It’s ok to admit that he’s had a hard time the last two years, that he’s happy to be taking some time away from the sport and to take care of his mental health.

He slowly made his way back to the McLaren garage as he pushed through the crowd, dodging fans trying to get selfies and autographs, politely declining additional interviews and comments from strangers. In a sea of blurred faces, he spotted you. One of the mechanics had gifted you an extra celebratory cowboy hat and you appeared to be in deep conversation with one of them. Your hands moved around animatedly as you spoke, like they always did when you were passionate about something. The mechanic laughed, and he wondered what joke you had told or whether you had said something unintentionally funny. He found himself smiling, excited to get the answer.

The mechanic noticed him first and waved. He touched your shoulder and pointed in Daniel’s direction. You squinted as you searched the crowd with intense focus. Daniel’s heart nearly exploded when your eyes finally landed on him – you waved eagerly with the biggest, brightest smile on your face that put all the track lights and fireworks to shame.

The mechanic gave him a quick hug and pat on the back first, adding a subtle wink for good measure before walking away, seemingly aware of the need for the two of you to have your own space. For the second time that day, you engulfed each other in a warm, firm hug that perhaps lasted a beat too long. He liked how you perched on your tip toes to get your head as close to the crook of his neck as possible. He liked the feeling of your small, delicate hands on his back. He liked that he could smell your hair products, distinct from the scent of your perfume, sweet florals and jasmine contrasting accents of patchouli and bergamot. He liked you.

“Congratulations! I’m so happy for you, you were amazing today,” you gushed.

“Thanks,” he said, knowing that the flush he felt in his cheeks wasn’t from the race.

“How are you feeling now?” you asked sincerely. He took a moment to think on it before answering.

“I’m not sure. Good I think, but tired.”

“That’s valid.”

“How was your day?” It was an innocent question, so he was confused when you laughed. He was just trying to make conversation. “What?”

“You just had your last race of the season and you’re officially getting out of your contract with McLaren tomorrow, and you’re asking me how my day went?” He shrugged.

“I’ve already talked about myself more than enough today. I want to hear about you.” Your laugh lines softened.

“Well, let’s see. I didn’t have to work, I met Usher, and I got to watch my friend’s last F1 race and he kicked so much butt. So I’d say it was pretty great.” His heart skipped a beat. Friend.

“You met Usher?” He glossed over the other stuff, unable to trust himself if you delved any further into the topic.

“Yeah, he was hanging out in the McLaren garage. Did not have that on my 2022 bingo card. But uh…” a sheepish grin grew on your face. “I don’t think he appreciated I kept dropping his lyrics in casual conversation.”

“Oh no,” he laughed, and the smile on your face grew.

“Y’know… just when I thought I said all I could say, he was like…yeah. And he also said -”

“Hold on let me guess,” he said between giggles. “You remind him of a girl he once knew.”

“You know…you would not believe all the things she put him through,” you said, joining him in laughter. He observed you playing with your hands behind your back, your chest puffed slightly, clearly finding great joy in your own corny jokes.

“Maybe if we’re lucky he’ll perform at the McLaren afterparty.” The words rolled off his tongue before he had the chance to think about what he was asking of you. It was one thing to go out with some of the other drivers offsite, but a McLaren sponsored event when you had been their adversary only a short few months ago was less than appropriate.

“You’ll have to let me know.” His heart fell a little, not missing the polite decline of his subtle invitation. He didn’t want to admit how much he truly needed you there. But he was on a roll with this whole honesty thing, so he bore his soul to you.

“I don’t want to go,” he said in a low voice, running an anxious hand through his hair. “I’m tired and I don’t know how I’m supposed to spend the night celebrating with these people. I can barely look half of them in the eye.” He couldn’t remember the last time he had begged for anything. He hoped his plea would be convincing enough, but you only gave him a sympathetic smile.

“You’ll be ok. Lando will be there, and there are plenty of people in your garage that had nothing to do with the decisions Zak or Andrea made. You still have people in your corner. Lots of them. And they want to celebrate with you.” He closed his eyes as you encouragingly rubbed the side of his arm, but finished with a firm pat. “Chin up. You’re almost done.”

Right. The race was only half the battle he would face today. Until the end of the day, he was still an employee of McLaren.

“Will you come pick me up if the kids at school are mean to me?” He always used humor as a defense mechanism, but he hated how much truth there was in the metaphor. You leaned in close to whisper your reassurance, a calm pleasantness in your shadow of a smile. You spoke slowly and deliberately.

“I will commit a felony and make it look like an accident if anyone is mean to you.” He was left grinning from ear to ear when you pulled away, your quiet resolve contagious as he felt his anxiety melt away. “You got this, and I promise I will celebrate with you after everything is signed tomorrow.” You extended your pinky, and he gladly linked his with yours in a solemn vow.

“Fuck ‘em all, yeah?”

“Fuck ‘em all.”

You sat in bed freshly showered, full body shaved, and facemask on. You felt guilty as hell sending your client off to the lion’s den with no support, so you had gone straight back to the hotel once he was out of sight. There was no need to go to the Amber Lounge or anything, not that you would even be able to get in without Daniel. Besides, you had your own personal Super Bowl tomorrow that you needed to be prepared for. You had ordered room service and shot off a few emails when you heard a knock. You checked the time – it was nearly midnight. You wrapped yourself in the cozy hotel robe for modesty before checking the peephole. To your confusion, but not surprise, you saw Daniel standing by himself in the hallway.

“Hi?” He looked up, admiring your frame in the doorway. You were just as beautiful in a robe and slippers as you were in a LBD and Louboutins. He bit his lip for a moment, clearly holding back a smile.

“Hi. Uh, I think you got something-” he trailed off, lightly brushing the tip of his nose with his finger.

“What? Oh! Fuck. Right.” You turned around to quickly rip the nose strip off your face. You winced, feeling the sting of the adhesive. You did your best to hide your discomfort and embarrassment with a smile when you turned back around. “Sorry about that. You’re back earlier than I thought.”

“Yeah. I figure I showed enough face for the evening. Plus big day tomorrow, right?” You nodded, unsure where this exchange was going as he fidgeted in place. “Also…” he looked around cautiously. “I didn’t want to get caught stealing this.” He pulled a bottle of very expensive champagne from behind his back, proudly presenting it to you. Your jaw dropped and morphed into a giant grin in spite of the arguably illegal activities that had transpired.

“You didn’t…For me?” You grabbed the bottle from him, feelings goosebumps form when your fingers brushed. “Wait. If I accept this, does it make me an accomplice or accessory after the fact?” He chuckled.

“I don’t know, you’re the lawyer. You tell me.” He took a step forward.

“Well. I’m not going to say no to a free drink I suppose,” you said, examining the bottle in your hands. He cleared his throat.

“I figured we could enjoy it after tomorrow – or, I mean, you could enjoy it,” he took another step forward. For reasons unknown, he seemed to lose confidence as the gap between you narrowed.

You looked back up at him, inspecting his condition. Perhaps he was a little tipsy, but he was far from being wasted which you were pleasantly surprised about given his apprehensions going into the evening. It either meant he wasn’t leaning on alcohol to handle his emotions, or he was taking tomorrow’s signing very seriously, or both. Whichever one it was, it demonstrated restraint and growth and you were proud of him for it. Admittedly, you had also been nervous leaving him to his own devices for the evening. You had wanted to go with him, to be there for emotional support. You had relied on the rationale that it was a McLaren sponsored event, but at this point the two of you had a consistent track record of blurring the lines of professionalism and friendship whenever you went out together. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust him – you didn’t trust yourself.

But the man standing in front of you was composed and mature (relatively speaking, of course). Perhaps a little nervous, as you watched his Adam’s apple bob in his throat. But nevertheless, even after the emotional, mental, and physical turmoil of the day, he stood before you with respect and poise. Yes, you trusted yourself with him wholeheartedly.

You took a step back, opening the door wider.

“How about we enjoy it now?”

Tags: @ravenqueen27 @leslizzle @zendayabelova @eitak-t @chiliwhore @wewoo1233 @thatchickwiththecamera

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twst-hottest-takes · 4 months ago

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OKAY TRAUMA OLYMPICS TIME!

Ranking every Overblotter based on how sad their backstory makes me: THAT MEANS IT’S VERY BIASED AND SUBJECTIVE!

Waves hands in a manic gesture towards the disclaimer* (Now is your chance to turn around!)

7: Azul Ashengrotto-Got picked on for being different. The thing that takes me out about Azul’s backstory and its connection to his overblot is how basic it feels. I’m not here to invalidate his feelings, I understand those insecurities, but apparently the only thing stopping more people from overblotting is that they can’t accumulate blot at the same rate because of lower magic output. If you ask me, the real tragedy of his character is his inability to acknowledge his own achievements. He says, “I’ll show them!” and, yes, hon, you did. Calm down. You are 17, nothing is stopping you from becoming the person you say you are (unlike half the other people on this list). (0/10 He tried to take advantage of my compassion and took my home away. He can cry harder into his money for all I care. Also bottom tier Overblot design.)

(Slight edit: changed Azul's age to 17 because I put 15 before. That would have been his age before turning human to go to NRC, but that might have been confusing and seemed inaccurate. Thanks to the person who pointed that out! The rest of the statement remains the same.)

6: Vil Schoenheit—Hates being typecast and treated like number two. Bro’s real crime is checking his socials too much and letting it get to him. I feel nothing for Vil and he’s only above Azul because his situation is a little less common as a one in a million super celebrity which can come with outlandish amounts of stress I can't comprehend. Again, the tragedy is his inability to be satisfied with his current state of his career and acknowledge his success because someone’s always above him. YOU ARE 18! YOU HAVE YOUR WHOLE CAREER AHEAD OF YOU! Give yourself some space to breath. He’s the one character you’d think would know and see a therapist. He’s so perfectly managed about every other element of his life it seems almost out of character for him not to be considering his mental health. If you consider he's even taking time away from his career to go to school and have "normal teen experiences" I don't know why I should feel bad. (0/10 Attempted murder. Jealous biotch. Probably, less sympathetic than Azul actually.)

5: Leona Kingscholar—Also hates his life situation and being treated like second fiddle. Leona is above Vil because he DOESN’T have a way out of being “typecast.” Time and talent can't save him. He was born into a situation where he can’t be anything other than the second prince and when he finally got a chance to be number one at something (Spelldrive at NRC) Malleus shows up to put him back down to second place again. Life seems to have a karmic way of making Leona nothing more and I feel that. Honestly, Leona’s state makes me cry but I can’t rank him higher because the canon content for his character is sparse. Most of the elements about Leona are things you have to look into and read out of his actions and backstory and while that’s not bad, it’s frustrating that a lot of people overlook them because they aren’t as explicit as the other characters. Leona’s depression is very real, but because the symptoms manifest as less sad-boy and more tired jackass a lot of people overlook his failing mental health. He’s badly written and I feel like the first iteration of his backstory (Book 2 in game) does the worst job about making you feel anything for him considering his actions. (4/10 Smart character with lots of potential but written like an idiot where it counted. Also attempted murder.)

4: Malleus Draconia (TENTATIVE)—Doesn’t want to be alone. After all, what’s the point of being so powerful when it’s so lonely? Loneliness is a feeling that I think doesn’t get explored enough in the media I consume (maybe I need to look harder), so Malleus can be a little higher for what I currently perceive as his reasons for overblotting. He’s an immortal being constantly ostracized by the position he was born into and suffers from the classic conundrum of having to watch everyone he cares about go before him. For all intents and purposes he’s an orphan. He doesn’t have a lot of people he’s related to and can really consider close, so it hits him extra hard when they can’t be around anymore, and for all of his age, as a fae he’s really very young, immature, and inexperienced. The game is doing its darndest to make sure that he gets as thorough an explanation as possible and actively wants you to understand where he’s coming from and feel bad. So he gets the halfway point because as much as I love this kind of thing, favoritism and getting the longest time to explore his feelings only gets him so high. (6/10 I like that the MC has a personal stake in this one, and he's not actively trying to kill anyone.) (Since Book 8 isn’t over yet, his position is subject to change later.)

3: Riddle Rosehearts—Anal retentive to the extreme. Riddle’s mom is so hated by the fandom she is never getting a face reveal. Is now the time to express how bad I feel about Riddle being traumatized by strictness and rules to the point where he honestly believes that bending the most absurd rules will result in disastrous consequences? Maybe. I appreciate that we saw exactly the inciting incident that made Riddle the way he is now. So much of his character falls back on that one time he broke the rules as a kid, and it HAS SO MUCH IMPACT. He gets a lot of props for being one of the few overblotters to actually have character growth post-featured book. Riddle is a contender for second place, but his potential ability to grow beyond his circumstances makes him less tragic. (7/10 Riddle is a surprisingly strong first antagonist in the main story. Almost killed someone, but that was notably AFTER he broke down and turned into a rampaging monster.)

2: Jamil Viper—Can never be his true self. Jamil is another guy who was born into his lifestyle and has no feasible way out of what’s driving him up the wall. It’s not just about Kalim being naïve and sheltered, it’s about how Jamil himself can’t ever use the gifts he has or escape from that fate. He is better than Kalim at a lot of things, but has to act like an amateur so he doesn’t outshine the guy he’s been sworn to protect and serve. He has expectations set on him, and duties to fulfill, and his best route in life as presented to him is just to be as average and boring as possible despite his innate talent and potential. I don’t know if there’s supposed to be a way for Jamil to get out of his family’s servitude to the Al-Asims that causes him to be so bitter, so at this point I kind of assume he’s stuck and that makes it extra sad. The fact that he really just wants to go on vacation makes it hit harder that he’s not even that bad for a guy at a villains’ school. Book 5 giving him a chance to break out of that shadow is great, honestly. (8/10 I can't hate him. He just wants a break, man. He wasn't even trying to hurt anyone, but loses a point for dragging Yuu/MC into his scheme. [Don't y'all dare throw Kalim hate in here. That's not what this is about. I will fight you.])

1: Idia Shroud—Survivor’s Guilt. Book 6 really went there and we are going to talk about it. He did something he shouldn’t have as a kid and now he has to live with the fact that his kid brother is dead. He wanted so badly to undo what he did that he built a new version of him even though he knew deep down he could never replace Ortho. No. I’m sorry. You’re not beating that. That’s not event including the fact that he’s also stuck as a fracking guardian of the underworld in a family that is supposed to be incapable of overblotting in the first place. Idia has textbook depression, and that’s not a bad thing. He feels just as trapped as everyone else and doesn’t see a point to doing anything the conventional way if he doesn’t have to. Idia is NOT a perfect person or character, but as far as his writing for why he ends up doing what he does, I think he easily takes the cake. (10/10 Will weep again. Character writing, with a little dash of hope that he can find some bright spots in life. Extra points for Ortho telling him to keep living. Also, he has the coolest Overblot design. 100/10 for Technopunk Hades.)

This is a super abridged version of what I have to say regarding each of these characters, so I may have to write out actual essays and character analysis for them eventually. I tried to get out the gist of my rankings in as short a form as possible, but that might not be good enough for some people. Feel free to tell me how I misunderstand and mischaracterize your fave.

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jade-len · 1 year ago

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guys, guys.

be honest with me. would anybody be willing to read any SVSSS x reader stuff (or, just SVSSS with reader fanfics in general?) like please i'm being so deadass right now. i am very willing to write, it's just that i have no clue if anyone would want to read that???

i know that the people in this fandom don't necessarily have any x or & readers, but i'm sad and pathetic and have a weird emotional attachment to the characters. like hear me out guys.

i present to you all a few ideas i have:

1. reader transmigrates into SVSSS and decides, fuck it, let's become a counselor/therapist/emotional support service pal. half of the conflicts in the novel would've been prevented if therapy, communication, and simple observation existed! mu qingfan, give me a chance!! i promise this will lower the qi deviation rates by at least 50%.

liu qingge? alright, let's work on learning identifying your feelings better and not respond via violence to every situation. shen jiu? hey, hey, it's okay to be vulnerable! no- please don't go self projecting yourself onto an innocent 14 year old. luo binghe? *pulls out 5 different documents* heavens, where do we even start? like, gods forbid any of them have a proper support system, or at least be able to express their feelings and deal with them in a healthy manner!

2. liu qingge x reader where he gradually stops painfully pining and gets the love that he deserves. he gets his pretty face cupped gently and kisses all over it. that's it. that's the fic idea.

3. bingge, the original luo binghe, gets sent back in time.. all the way back to right when his mother died. he believes that he's been given a chance to re-enact his revenge, play it smart all the way from the start and have an upper hand now that he has to relive this! however, that quickly changes when this random fucking person (aka, reader) just wont stop bothering him?? what the hell do they want??? (for this one, i'm not sure if reader should be a transmigrator who believes they're in SVSSS instead of PIDW and is unaware of the whole bingge thing, or just some npc that proves him wrong about kindness).

4. SVSSS hater (or someone who just has a very complicated relationship with it!) reader transmigrates into it after tweeting "stupid author, stupid novels". they then proceed to accidentally collect two husbands they were so actively against before. ugh! now that i'm here, i guess i'll try to help out with their relationship and give my advice so that they won't have so much conflict, ones that were super frustrating to even hear about!! shen qingqiu, that dense ass guy and unhealthily codependent luo binghe! wait, what? what do you mean they both want me to be part of their marriage now??

sincerely, very much inspired by this tweet (reader most likely isn't going to be an anti, though);

low-key might combine the first and fourth fanfic idea? will make reader gender neutral (or even male!) though. but overall idk. idk if people will even wanna see that at all, man. ok please give thoughts. or not lol

(10-11-23 edit: i'm currently writing the bingge one rn!)

#pls guys jus think abt it..#can you guys believe that i created a tumblr account just to say this #excuse the shameless amount of tags yall #svsss #luo binghe #shen qingqiu #shen jiu #shen yuan #bingqiu #liu qingge #scumbag self saving system #the scum villain's self saving system #gender neutral reader #male reader

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gaymakima · 27 days ago

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rating different ozpins out of 10

There's a lot of them. Long post ahoy.

Volume 1: pale ass man. flings his students into Grimm-infested forests and does not give a FUCK. not actually listening to anyone half the time my autistic king. despite the limited animation, you look into this man's eyes and you can tell he's secretly a little shit (affectionate). 9/10

Volume 2: I was gonna put a screenshot of his face and talk about how much better the lighting is in this volume but I saw this on the wiki and this man has NO ASS. He has NO CAKE. the dilf caring mentor vibes this volume are off the charts yet i can't get over this shot. 4/10 the no ass really hurts him

Volume 3: Colourful lighting, soft gaze, blorbo burdened by the weight of his sins. Not so pale that it hurts to look at. His mischievous demeanour is gone in place of sad immortal old man vibes. A shame to see the silly go, but I love a man with flaws who tries his genuine best to do good. 8/10

Volume 5: This part of the OP was always so jarring to me. The silly has returned but they flattened him and it looks odd. Is he doing the :3 face? 2/10 for hiding it in profile.

Volume 6: The first Ozpin in Maya! Unfortunately, he has to contend with the original Ozma this episode, and sadly his one second of sad old man hours kind of gets outshined by fucking. everything his past incarnations go through. Nice to see him in model again though. 6/10 (Ozma is like. 10/10 btw)

Volume 9: this isn't even ozpin. -100000/10.

Chibi: This is peak. I don't even care anymore. I'll say it. RWBY chibi is the peak of rwby content and I'm tired of pretending it's not. this man is the embodiment of silly. he would :3 and he would have the decency to look at the camera when he does. if this oz ever met salem... okay he'd probably make things a lot worse but it would be really funny. 11/10

Ice Queendom: ∞/10 daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. da

This one render: what are you scheming about you shifty little fucker. this is the face of a man who has done something to mildly inconvenience you and he's waiting for you to realise it. gay ass smirk. i appreciate it for bringing back mischievous ozpin in the maya engine but there is something about this i do not trust. 6/10

(bonus) the exact same render but in this thumbnail with his ex wife: 9.5/10. Salem addition really brings out the best in this one. Ozlem in a romcom. He gets pegged and he's proud of it.

Volume 3 japanese poster: eh. it could be better. I don't sense the silly OR the sad old man OR the fuckable mentor in this one. 1/10.

Volume 6 poster: YEAARGHHH THATS WHAT I CALL ANGST, BABY!!!! 11/10!!!!

Viz manga: with this and ice queendom, the jp side of rwby understands how to make an ozpin that appeals to me, specifically. 20/10.

Playing card: the hand in his pocket. the other hand resting lazily on his cane like it's a fucking samurai sword. the slightly cocky smirk. this is Ozpin after spending a day with the Branwen Twins. a young raven and qrow saw this and thought he was the coolest fucking dude ever (he is not). was going to rank it a bit lower but due to my headcanon going straight to ozpin and bird twins I like it. 8/10

this shirt: i would comment more if i could see. 3/10?? he looks sad i think which is nice

DC Comics: PUT THAT FUCKING MOP HAIR BACK!!! -10/10!!! YOU GIVE QROW HIS HAIR GEL BACK RIGHT NOW MISTER

RWBY/JL: this is an imposter. his hair looks like fits on his head like lego figure hair. -2/10

conclusion: i want him to whimper.

#rwby #ozpin #professor ozpin #rwby ice queendom #rwby chibi #ozlem #my post #my thoughts have been plagued by him. he must pay.

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torialefay · 11 months ago

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☀️ Everyday Idol 🌙 (Chapter 4) ✨

✨ possible bangchan x reader (f), possible jungkook x reader (f)

✨ head on over to my masterlist if you haven’t checked out the previous chapters!

✨wc: ~4.5k

✨ friends to lovers? possible love triangle? future angst and smut??? definitely fluff.

✨ summary: JYP Entertainment launches a new show and y/n somehow gets recruited. Even though she doesn’t particularly care about the outcome of the show, she does particularly care about one of the artists she met: Chris from Stray Kids. Does Chris feel the same or will a potential relationship with one of his friends overcome what y/n feels for him?

✨ author’s notes: pls pls pls let me know if you’d prefer shorter, more frequent chapters like this one, OR longer chapters posted about once per week. i’m heavily debating lol

✨ warnings: cursing from time to time.

Previous Chapter Recap:

As wonderful as the daydream was, Chan suddenly snapped out of it. He froze, standing rigid, then almost tumbling back. There’s no way.

There you stood in front of him. With all the beauty that you were. But you were with someone. A man. Chan squinted to see what he could make out. Jungkook? Fuck, that was definitely Jungkook.

You smiled up at him and clung onto him for a long hug. He gave in, leaning his head down to plant a small kiss on the top of your forehead. With that, you giggled, waved, then ran inside the company building.

With that, Chan felt his heart shatter for the very first time.

Through the building’s glass walls, he watched as you made your way a little further, then stopped to bring your phone out. 10 seconds later, he felt a buzz from his phone.

From: y/n’s instagram

Hey, I’m here :) Should I head on up to you?

He wanted to cry.

Note: More characters are involved in this chapter! Just wanted to lay it out here to refer back to if needed.

Y/n- Changbin’s mentee

Anna- best friend, Felix’s mentee

Kara- Seungmin’s mentee

Sunnie- Han’s mentee

Mindi- Hyunjin’s mentee

Nisha- Lee Know’s mentee

Alyssa- Jeongin’s mentee

Jenna- Chan’s mentee

————————————————————————

Y/n’s POV:

You felt like you were floating. You felt like you were unstoppable. You wanted so badly to call Anna and tell her that you had just had the best date of your life. The conversation was so easy with Jungkook. You may not have had much in common, but he was FUNNY. He was charming too- such a gentleman. True, you didn’t know him extremely well yet, but the side he did show you was basically perfect.

The butterflies in your stomach just wouldn’t go away. You needed to step aside though and text Chan, letting him know you were here to see him. You were curious to know what he would say. Okay, curious may not be the right word. You were SHAKING waiting to find out what he would say. But either way, it was fine. You were unstoppable after all.

Hey, I’m here :) Should I head on up to you?

*SEND*

You stepped to the side of the building so that you were away from the middle of the foot traffic entering and exiting the building, waiting for Chan to respond. You didn’t want to show up to his studio unannounced, especially if he was in the middle of something.

Looking down at the bouquet still in your hands, you let your mind wander back to your last few seconds with Jungkook. How he was the perfect height for you to hug him and get your face just above his shoulder. How warm he felt while standing out in the cold. How completely natural it felt with him. How when you pulled away, he had the most endearing look in his eyes and a big smirk on his face. He spoke lowly, almost whispered, “Can I see you again?” lowering his head to land a gentle kiss to your forehead. All you could do was blush and give one quick nod, avoiding his eyes. You giggled and waved, as you took off to head toward the building. You pictured the way he looked while waving back to you, almost sad that he wasn’t going with you. The day could simply not get better.

Unless Chan confessed his love to you of course. In which case, you’re fucked. Because what in the hell were you supposed to do then? You needed the universe to decide for you. Maybe Chan just wanted to talk to you about Berry’s health, if Bella had any similar problems, and what you did for them. Maybe he was curious how all of the mentees were doing and if there was anything he could do to help. Or maybe even to give you some tips before filming began- maybe he cared about you and genuinely wanted you to do well on the show. Any of those were more likely than him to say he had feelings for you. Hell, you barely knew the man.

You stood and twiddled your thumbs. A few minutes had gone by since you sent Chan the message. You were hoping he didn’t forget about you. You couldn’t take putting off all this anxiety for another day or so. You decided to look around and mentally note the small things in the JYPE building you hadn’t noticed before. How the walls were fully glass… Like FULLY glass. The chic silver lamps posted around the floor. The one giant green plant resting by the wall on the other side of the room. Someone was definitely taking good care of it.

*DING*

From: gnabnahc

Hey, yeah sorry. I figured out the answer to what I was going to ask you about. All good! Sorry to leave you hanging. Have a good day.

You put your phone down and somewhat felt your heart drop down into your stomach. You had been nervous, yes, but it was going to kill you more not to know. ‘Well hell.’ You puffed a breath out and frowned, crossing your hands over your chest. Just looking around now not quite sure what to do. ‘I guess I’ll just go and try to find Anna.’

You turned your attention back to your phone, frowning harder when Chan’s message was still displayed on the screen. You quickly swiped out of it and went to Anna’s ‘favorited’ contact in your phone.

Chris bailed. Where are you?

You stepped back shyly, not sure which way to head. You figured she would be in the cafeteria, probably with Kara and Sunnie. You decided to stand and wait for another second until she responded.

As you stood waiting, you saw an all black figure out of the corner of your eye. There were a million people moving in and out of the building, but this one was basically speed walking through. You noticed their entire head was down, fixated on the floor… Was that Chan?… The fingernails covered in black and white polish gave you the confirmation.

You could tell he was storming toward the elevator. Normally, you wouldn’t be so forward, but the stars were aligning it seemed like. You mirrored his fast pace and headed after him, off to the large elevator.

“Chris, hey! Wait up!” your voice raised slightly from behind him. You could see hesitancy in the way he slowly started to decelerate, almost shuddering in the process. Slowly, slowly, slowly, he turned his body around towards you. His normal smiley and joking exterior seemed to have gone away.

You finally caught up. “Hey!” you said cheerfully. ‘Game plan: Act like you’re not bothered and/or confused as hell.’ You smiled up to lock it in. “How are you?”

He was pale, almost like you’d be able to see every vein in his body if you tried hard enough. The only color on his face was a pink spot on the tip of his nose, probably from being outside in the cold. With his gaze on you, he looked like he’d seen a ghost.

He didn’t speak for a moment, collecting his bearings once he had finally fully turned to face you, beanie low almost covering his eyes. “I’m okay, how are you?” he said with a tone you could only describe as hollow. Distanced. Apathetic.

“I’m doing okay. Was just sad I wasn’t gonna be able to see you today!” you beamed. You were determined to lay it on thick. “But I’m glad you got everything worked out. I hoped everything was okay?”

He looked down to the flowers still resting in your hands, quickly bringing his eyes back up and settling somewhere on your face, but definitely not your eyes. “Yeah, it’s fine,” he strained out behind semi-gritted teeth. “But I’ve gotta get going upstairs. I’ll see you around.”

With that, he turned his body much quicker than before and paced the few yards away to reach the set of elevators, one of which was about to open.

You couldn’t believe he just brushed you off like that. Going to all the trouble to invite you to his studio, his one sacred space, and now the best he wants to do is “see you around?” Asshole. ‘This is the universe, y/n. This is just the universe giving you your answer. You asked for it and you got it. That’s a good thing isn’t it?’ you questioned yourself. ‘Of course it is. I have my answer. I can just focus on Jungkook from now on.’

Realizing you had just been standing in the middle of the floor, you stepped aside and checked your phone.

From: Anna

he bailed? wtf! on the rooftop with our friends, come find me rn please.

Thank God. You didn’t think you could deal with standing here alone for much longer. You started toward the elevator and waited patiently for it to arrive once you mashed the button.

The rooftop sounded like a cool place. And it was. It was basically additional space for people to hang out NOT inside of a practice room or shooting room. A lot of people would take food up there just to eat and chill with friends. It was fully encapsulated though, just like the first floor, with floor to ceiling windows- windows even comprising the entirety of the ceiling. It had a breathtaking view. You had selfishly hoped Anna would be alone. ‘God damn it,’ you thought as you stepped onto the elevator, pressing the uppermost button for the rooftop and then settling into the back corner. ‘If Anna doesn’t keep her big ass voice down, so help me god.’ You pictured having to cover her mouth with your hand to stop her from letting out expressions that could be heard on the other side of the room. That was one thing about your best friend- nothing was ever inconspicuous with her. You DID love that that meant there were no secrets between you two. What you DIDN’T love was that she inadvertently made both of your business everyone else’s business. AND your other friends were with her. So that’s gonna be awkward. As much as you were thankful for Kara and Sunnie’s friendship, they weren’t exactly known for hating drama. It was definitely best to leave them out of this. ‘God I hope they don’t get too curious. What am I supposed to say?’

You brainstormed different ideas, different lines you could pull to get her one-on-one without seeming like something was wrong. You thought and thought and thought until you arrived at your floor.

————————————————————————————

You narrowed your eyes as you scanned the rooftop for your friends. Long cafeteria-style benches lined the middle. As intently as you looked, you didn’t recognize the tops of any of their heads. ‘But is that? Ah fuck.’ It was the top of Felix’s head. Closer look. ‘Oh goody. Changbin, Seungmin, and Han too.’ Behind their slew of heads, you noticed the shorter frames of Anna, Kara, and Sunnie. ‘Cool. This should be cool,’ you sneered to yourself.

As you walked toward the group, you saw Anna’s head first, briskly turning in your direction. She snapped her head back toward the others, said a few words, let out a quick smile, and then unseemingly got up and walked toward you instead. Once she was out of their field of view, she picked up her pace and motioned for you to move backwards toward the elevator. There was a small foyer between the elevator and the rooftop room, so you decided to back track and wait there.

“Are you crazy?!” Anna scream-whispered once she arrived. “You were gonna bring that big ass bouquet in there and not expect people to ask questions?!” she pushed her hand down to motion to the flowers. “BEAUTIFUL big ass bouquet, oh my gosh,” she got side tracked, taking them in her hands and examining them.

“I’ve had more things on my mind than remembering some flowers in my hands. ALSO you told me it would be our friends up here, not an entire crew!”

“Hey, the guys are our friends too,” she frowned, handing the bouquet back.

“You know what I mean!” You pierced into her eyes. “BUT, holy shit Anna that was the best date I’ve ever been on!!!” you squealed. Your voice had raised at least 3 octaves. Your one free hand started flapping freely as you talked. “He was such a gentleman. He held my hand as I walked up the stairs. He made a reservation at this fancy restaurant for us. He helped me take my coat off AND put it back on. He paid for both of us and left a good tip. And, well obviously, he got me these flowers,” you blushed. “And it was just so easy with him! The conversation just kept flowing. The date was over before I knew it. I mean I am kinda relieved its over just because of nerves, but ugh, it was just- it couldn’t have gone any better.” The smile on your face and sparkle on your eyes told Anna that right away, but she let you ramble on. “OH OH and get this! When I went to leave, he KISSED. MY. FOREHEAD. Deadass his lips touched my forehead. And he asked if he could see me again! I- AHHHH!” You hush-screamed, waving your hands all around. Your eyes had closed tight from how much smiling you’d been doing.

“You said yes I’m presuming?” a smirky grin sprawled across her face, eyes looking into yours like she was teasing.

You rolled your eyes with a shit-faced grin. “Yes bitch, I said yes,” you laughed.

“That’s so amazing,” her eyes turned into puppy dog ones now, pout on her lips. “My little bestie is in loveeeee.”

“Okay, let’s not go that far. But yes, it was really reallllly good.” You couldn’t stop smiling.

“I’m just so happy for you… And like, not to ruin the moment, but what happened with Chris?”

You took a deep breath. ‘Not to ruin the moment my ass.’ You closed your eyes for a few seconds and shrugged your shoulders. You didn’t know much, just that he canceled on you and then left you hanging, yet again in the lobby. ‘Just a hot and cold asshole, I guess.’ Your respect for him had basically gone out the window… Buttt, maybe you were being a tad bit unreasonable. Maybe he just got busy. HONESTLY, you were probably reading too much into it. After all, he’d done nothing to make you think that he was interested in you in anyway. That was all just wishing thinking on your end. ‘And ACTUALLY, I should be thankful for him canceling. Now I can put to rest the stupid thought that he wanted to talk to me about anything more than a simple question he was curious about. There was no picking between them, because Chris was never in the equation to begin with. See, that’s good!’ you thought to youself. Still, you couldn’t deny that your heart ached a tiny bit, lost in the possibility of what could have been. But now you’d never know.

You expressed that to Anna as best as you could.

————————————————————————

Chan’s POV:

Chan could physically feel his heart fall into his ass. He set his phone down on the table and proceeded to punch both fists down on either side of his keyboard. Today, he was supposed to be nervous, yes- but not gutted. Not like how he felt now.

You were supposed to be in his studio with him now. He was supposed to be talking to you about how to do well on the show and how he would help you with anything you needed. How if you ever needed a shoulder to cry on, he would always be there for you. Just like last time. But only for you, he wanted you to know. The others were great. His mentee was great too. But none of them were you. None of them captivated him like you. None of them showed their raw emotions, nor got them out of him, like you None of them so effortlessly filled in the gaps that were missing inside of him like you. It had to be you, it just had to.

‘Way to go Chris. Not only did you ruin your shot by not taking it earlier, but now she probably feels like you blew her off… As if she would ever look at you anyways. She has Jungkook now. What more could she want? He’s way more successful, talented, and handsome than you could ever be… You know what? You can’t even be mad at her for going with him. Damn, you would too if you were her. Why would she want someone like you? Can’t do anything right. Couldn’t even get her here in the first place. You just didn’t deserve it. You don’t deserve her.’

With his head dropped low over his keyboard, fists still resting by the keyboard, he wanted to cry. He really really wanted to cry. But makeup was done, and there would only be a few moments for touch ups with so many people shooting today. So no, he couldn’t cry. But damn if he couldn’t get angry.

In a split second, any ounce of sense he had left his body. He started pounding his fists repeatedly into the table holding his keyboard. Hit after hit after hit. He didn’t care how it hurt, he just needed to let the inner pain out. Maybe by doing that, he could replace it. He bounced up out of his seat, darting hid head to look for anything he could get his hands on. A snarl spread wide across his face. A lone pillow sat on his couch, and he lunged down, throwing jabs into it left and right. In that moment, he was thankful for all the makeup to cover his face which had gone completely red with frustration. “GOD DAMN IT,” he screamed with a final punch to the pillow, now moving on to throw punches down into the couch. He felt his knuckles turn red from rubbing harshly against the fabric. Probably rubbed raw, he could tell. But he still didn’t care. He eyed down an empty plastic bottle on the table, rage still written in his face, and took a swift hold on it, using both hands to twist in opposite directions until it was completely deflated. With as much aggression as he could muster, he threw it to the ground and thrusted his heavy boot-covered foot down on top of it to squash it. Another stomp followed, then one after that, then one after that. He threw his entire heart, body, and soul into it with each violent step. “FUCK,” he screamed out, when he was finally satisfied. His teeth still snarled, he took a deep breath and huffed it out as quickly as he brought it in. He sprang toward the door, forcefully opening it before storming out. He didn’t know where he was going yet. He just knew he couldn’t be in that god damned room for one more second. Not without you.

———————————————————————————

Y/n’s POV:

You and Anna had made it to the filming rooms on level 10. You made sure to get there a bit early in order to find out which room to go to. There were around 50ish Everyday Idol contestants, not to mention their mentors who were also there to shoot intro materials. It was chaos trying to figure out where to go. You passed by Room #4, locating your name on the sign. Anna, Kara, and Sunnie were also filming in this room. You noted four other names on the sign, so you assumed that all the Stray Kids’ mentees would be here. So naturally, the members would be as well.

‘Fuck my life.’

You each squeezed your way through the crowd to make it past the doorway. You were happy when the first face you saw was Changbin. He was dressed in a fitted black top, dark jeans, black shoes, and a black leather jacket. A single small silver chain finished off the look. It was the first time you’d seen him out of the confines of a practice room, so seeing him all dressed up was a new experience.

They most likely matched your outfits up to give mentors and mentees a similar vibe. You looked down to your own outfit, giving it a final once-over. Tight black pants, a loose black button up that had been styled to hang off your shoulders, chunky boots, and plenty of silver rings, earrings, and bracelets. Your favorite of all was the dainty silver necklace wrapped around your neck with tiny stars and planets dangling off. It was too loose to be considered a choker, but too tight to be a plain necklace. Something about it fitting just right around your neck made you feel some type of new sexy vibe. Well that, plus the muted dark red lip choice was a dead giveaway of what they were going for. The final touchups before walking in had definitely been good to you.

Changbin walked your way, offering a small wave.

“Binnie!” you smiled and hugged him. His thick arms wrapped around you, making you feel safe. “What have you been up to today?”

“We had practice earlier, then a bunch of us ate together. You were invited obviously. Where were you?”

You panicked. The first thing to come to mind is what spilled out. “Oh, you know… just lady problems,” you brought your eye up into a dramatic wink.

“Well that’s something,” he made fun. “I hope you’re okay though?”

‘How sweet.’ “No, I’m totally fine! Just semi-nervous trying to figure out what we’re supposed to be doing today.” You looked around, making a mental note of the others in the room.

“They’ll walk us through it, and we can practice of course! They’ll probably put you in the frame and make you answer a bunch of prompts so other people can get to know you. Where you’re from, likes and dislikes, what you do in the ‘normal’ world, nlah blah blah. Then they’ll probably get some takes of us talking- that part I don’t know much about yet. I do know that you and I will take some photos together at the end. Same for the rest of the members and group photos as well. They will probably want some interaction between only you all. Nothing really to worry about.” He was right, it didn’t sound too bad. Apart from the fact that Chan would be here any minute and even if he didn’t feel it, the awkwardness you would feel is through the roof.

‘Calm and collected, y/n. Calm and collected. Literally what are you worried about? This is gonna be so easy.’

“Obviously I know you, Anna, Kara, and Sunnie, but I can’t quite remember the names of the other girls. I know we all met at drinks the other night, so I feel kinda bad,” he looked down, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Don’t feel bad. I really haven’t seen them since that night either.” You knew two of them fairly okay- Mindi and Nisha. They were super sweet, Hyunjin and Minho’s mentees. The other two, you weren’t quite sure about. Alyssa was Jeongin’s mentee and nothing was necessarily wrong with her, she just kept more to herself and didn’t seem very friendly to the rest of the group. Jenna, who had Chan as a mentor, was the same way. I mean surface level, they were fine, and you could all get along well enough. But do you ever get the feeling that someone just isn’t a “girl’s girl?” It’s like that. They aren’t girl’s girls. That’s probably why they clung onto each other.

And if you were honest, you weren’t quite sure how Jenna felt about you. You tried your best to talk with her, to make a connection in some way. Either she didn’t like you or her personality was comparable to a rock. ‘Either way, that is one dry bitch,’ you thought. You’d never say that out loud though. Ever since the night you’d all met up for drinks, something was off about her. An air of “I think I’m better than you” seemed to wear over her like a veil. You remembered how great the conversation was with Chan that night. The way that he looked at you, and how happy you both got when you kept finding things in common. It was like you had endless things to talk about. Even emotional things. You’d give up a lot to be able to go back to that night and experience it again. Maybe Jenna didn’t like you simply because you connected well with her mentor? ‘More than she did, I’m sure,’ you thought while rolling your eyes.

You walked with Changbin to the other side of the room where some of the Skz members and new cast members were all standing around talking. No Chris in sight though, thank god. They caught you up on everything you missed during lunch. Everyone compared outfits, went through what they’d probably have to talk about, all the usual stuff.

Felix pulled you to the side after a few minutes.

“Those flowers earlier were really pretty!” He teased, with a toothy smile spreading across his face.

‘Huh? Did he see me?’

“Aw, thank you! They were definitely some of the prettiest I’ve seen!” you played along, hoping he wouldn’t push further.

“Get them from anyone special?” he asked, again in the same sing-song tone. His cheeks were now stuck out from his smile, raising his eyebrows high on his face. He was definitely trying to wind you up.

‘Fuck, did he see me with Jungkook? I mean that’s fine I guess, but god please don’t make this weird. It was just a first date. Jesus Christ Felix why are you like this?’

“No,” you answered, trying to sound both playful and nonchalant. “It was just a friend. I’ll tell them you said that though! Thanks Felix.”

“No need, I already told him!” Felix winked down at you, nudging his elbow into your side. What the hell?

“Oh really? I didn’t know you two were close like that.” Literally not once had you seen any sign that they’d spoken to each other, let alone were good enough friends to keep in touch about girls they were taking to lunch.

“With Chan-hyung? We’re about as close as two people can get,” he laughed. “No way. I knew all along. And you’re welcome by the way. I may or may not have encouraged it hehe.” You watched as his eyes sparkled while they smiled. It would have been adorable if you had any clue what he was talking about.

All you could do was stare blankly at him. A confused expression must have been on your face long enough for Felix to notice.

“We are talking about Chan-hyung, right?”

“No… I got the flowers from Jungkook,” you said sheepishly.

You could see Felix’s eyes shoot open, going into panic mode. Fight or flight, I guess.

“Wait, are you talking about? OHHH those flowers! The ones from today. Ohhh okay, nevermind. Sorry, I was thinking about something completely different. Ohh okay, I see, I see now,” he rapidly mumbled out. He looked like he could start sweating at any minute, waiting to get your eye of approval before he switched topics.

‘Okay, so 2 possibilities. #1: Felix needs a lot more sleep. Or #2: Chan was going to give me flowers?!?!’

-----------------------------------------

✨Continue to ➡️ Chapter 5

✨if you enjoyed, please consider liking, commenting, or re-blogging <3

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thefrogman · 1 year ago

Text

On fucking up...

The house has been incredibly quiet since my dad passed. And that quiet turns into loneliness quite often for me. So last night I decided to use every spoon I had to go to the movies. I swallowed my social anxiety and went out into the world.

The theater had these recliners that sit on a raised step. But when you are actually sitting in the seat you can't see that step. Once the movie was over I forgot about the step. I got up to leave and my ankle caught it on the way down. I flew forward and crashed into the back of a row of seats.

A middle aged gentlemen saw this and said, "Gee buddy, this your first day walking?"

And the other 8 people in the theater gave a boisterous laugh.

I wanted to crawl in a hole and die.

Making a mistake feels bad.

Making a mistake in public is an embarrassing lesson in humility.

And making a mistake witnessed by 15,000 people is terrifying.

When you get something wrong and people call you out, your first instinct is to dig in. Everyone wants to dig in. Which is usually the worst possible reaction. You want to defend yourself. You don't want to believe you were wrong. And you start spewing out reasons why you can't be wrong. I think the current vernacular calls this "tweeting through it."

Over the years I have tried very hard to fight that instinct to dig in. To consider what people have said and recheck my facts to see if my original information could be inaccurate. And sometimes you find out you were right and strengthen your point of view.

But when you find out you were duped or misunderstood the information, there is nothing quite like that sinking feeling.

And when you are wrong in front of 15,000 people... that sinking feeling goes to the center of the earth.

You get sucked into a thought spiral...

"How do I fix this? Do I send a message to all 15,000 people? Do I just post a video of me repeatedly punching myself in the face? Do I delete the post? No, can't delete the post, people will think you are trying to hide your mistake. Plus all those reblogs."

You have to accept the fact that even if you publicly admit you were wrong, a lot of those people are never going to see it. They are going to believe the thing and possibly spread it to others.

You've created a runaway freight train and you just have to watch it crash into stuff.

The sad thing is I have learned this lesson a few times in my 10+ years of being a minor public figure. It has caused me to be so paranoid about passing along bad information that I will fact check things to death. Sometimes 5 or 6 sources. I'll look at reputable sources and disreputable sources. And I'll try to corroborate those disreputable sources just as an exercise to give me confidence I have the best information at that time.

But the other night I finished watching John Wick 4 and was high on action juice. I started watching every John Wick video on YouTube. My history shows about 40 videos. And at 2 or 3am I heard the director being hyperbolic in a podcast clip and thought a fun fact was too great not to share.

I thought, "I'm not telling people to eat horse paste for COVID. I'm not pretending I'm a submarine expert who knows exactly how to save people at the bottom of the ocean. It's just a flippy gun maneuver. I'm sure Chad knows what he is talking about."

So I posted the thing on my personal blog with sleep in my eyes and figured it was fine. And after 500 notes no one had really said anything, so I thought it was okay to share on my main blog.

And that was my biggest mistake. I deemed the subject matter to be trivial so I lowered my standards.

I forgot that damn step was there and flew into the seats.

There are dishonest people on the internet. Tons of them. People who will post dangerous misinformation without a care. People who have a pattern of lying. Grifters who thrive on baiting people for clicks. And I think it has caused us to react to bad information with hostility by default. People forget that there are still honest people who just make a mistake or get duped. Yet they can still feel the need to make people feel stupid for believing something that seems so obvious to them.

I have been guilty of this myself. I have called people out forgetting they are a human being behind that social media avatar.

The first person to call me out just said, "This is not true, LMFAO."

That's not helpful.

People made me feel like I was a liar. And I am very sensitive to that. For years doctors, family, and friends were skeptical of my Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. And when someone accuses me of being dishonest, I get very anxious and see red.

But I tried very hard not to dig in. I asked for more information--for evidence. Just point me in a direction so I can figure out what's true. But I got angry when all they said was that I was wrong without elaboration. Which is another form of digging in.

I guess I'm asking people to start with compassion before hostility. Maybe if we don't know the person or they have been a mostly reliable source, we can give people a chance. If the person has a history of deception, that's a different story. Bad faith is usually pretty easy to spot.

I remember for a long time I used to love telling people their blood was blue until it was exposed to oxygen. It was just the funnest fun fact I had ever heard and I *needed* others to know the thing I knew. Giving people knowledge can be intoxicating. But then I told my good friend who just became a medical resident and he was like, "I don't remember that in medical school. I think that might be an urban legend."

I still got that sinking feeling and I still had flashbacks to every person I told... but I was grateful he was so kind when he corrected me.

You can correct someone with kindness.

I'd ask that you imagine yourself in their shoes. Think about how embarrassing it is when you get something wrong. And just be like, "Hey, I think you got some bad information. Here's why."

When someone faceplants into a row of seats, metaphorically or otherwise, maybe ask if they are okay before laughing at them.

#long post

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blackwolfstabs · 4 months ago

Text

FALL FOR THOSE EYES

No matter what their parents say, Sam can't ignore Tara. (or Tara has separation anxiety)

fandom: Scream characters: Sam Carpenter, Tara Carpenter, Christina Carpenter, Mr. Carpenter content: pre-movie (Scream V) // Tara (4), Sam (10) a/n: i wrote this MONTHS ago (like 10 months ago, back when i first started my account lol) didn't expect to post it, didn't plan to post it, but here we are because i can't be fucking consistent. having said this, if you don't like what i write about, i don't need to hear about it, just skip over it please :) side note: Mikey is Tara's cat plush.

Sam lay awake in the darkness of her room in the early hours of 1:00 AM, staring at the ceiling as she listened to her baby sister cry relentlessly. She was going back and forth from her bedroom to their parents’ room, where she’d just be taken back by one of them. Having gone through this for countless nights, the older sibling knew that Tara would spend her time targeting their mother first, and then, when she wasn’t getting her way, she’d start to ask for their father.

But it never worked.

She hated to hear Tara cry so much, but she couldn’t understand why it was so hard for her to just go to sleep. Their parents weren’t going anywhere. They were just in the other room. She’d see them in the morning. Why was it so hard for her?

This time, she heard her mother bring Tara back into her room.

“Tara, you need to go night-night.”

By the sounds of the youngest’s shaky moans and sniffles, Sam guessed she was clinging to her as she put her back into her bed.

“I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Noo-hoooo!” And her hysterics stirred up again. “I wa-hant you to sta-hay, Mama-haaa!”

Christina left the room, leaving her daughter’s cries echoing down the hallway.

“Mama, pleeee-hease! Mama!”

Tara’s hitching breath was sharp, which made her listening sister start to worry that she would work herself up into an asthma attack. She heard her crying be interrupted by a few coughs, before it continued, her voice getting closer as she made another attempt to leave her room.

“Mm- Mmm– Mm-hmm… Mo-hommy…” She struggled to get out words in full sentences from her accumulated mucus. “I– Ih-hi… want yo-hou… Mommy…”

Great, now she was talking to herself. Samantha covered her face with her hands and lay still, hating how sad her baby sister sounded. And she couldn’t do anything for her. She had been told by their parents to ignore her crying, because she needed to learn. But it was so hard. She just wanted to go lay with her, so they could both get some sleep. She heard Tara’s footsteps retreat into the living room. Again.

A couple more seconds and the cycle repeated, but this time, it was their father bringing her back. Judging from where her whimpers came from, he was carrying her.

“Daddy, nooo-ho-hoo…”

“Shh-shhh, Tara,” her parent soothed. “You’re okay.”

Even though she wasn’t there, Sam could see him putting her back into bed and actually making the effort to tuck her in around her resistant squirms and sobs.

“Goodnight.”

However, Tara started to cry again as she tried to make him stay, “B-but… my-hy tummy h-hurts, Daddy!” She was already trying to get out of her blankets to prepare to follow him out.

“That’s because you’re crying so much, sweetheart,” he reasoned. A few quiet seconds passed, before he concluded his stay. “Calm down, you’re okay. Hug Mikey and take some deep breaths. Your tummy will feel better soon. Goodnight.”

“I want one more hug!”

Sam bit her lower lip. She hated it when Tara said that.

He must’ve given it to her. “Goodnight, Tara.”

Even after her last hug, the youngest Carpenter was thrown into another fit. “No, Da-ha-ha-ddy! Noooo!” Her bedroom door shut. Uhh-huh-huuhhh!”

Her older sister felt her eyes go hot as she dropped her hands to continue the one-sided stare-off with the ceiling. How long was she going to have to sit here and listen to this before Tara wore herself out? Her cries didn’t leave her room anymore, but they stayed coming through the wall, leaving Sam guessing that she was just lying there sobbing by herself. Their parents were across the house, so they didn’t have to hear how heartbroken she sounded…

A few minutes passed before all went quiet, and she thought that she must’ve cried herself to sleep. But then what she was most afraid of happened…

“Saaaam! … Sa-ha-hammy!”

The owner of the name screwed her eyes shut, but her sister’s pleas grew louder.

“Mmm– Saaaammyyy!”

She covered her ears with her hands, doing what she could to keep herself from running to her rescue. Only it wasn’t a rescue. Tara simply didn’t want to be alone in her room, but she could be. She was being trained to be. She could do it. She remembered what her mother had told her after she and her father had found out that she was sneaking into Tara’s room to keep her quiet.

“She’s a big girl now, Sam. She has to learn how to self-soothe.”

But it was so hard to ignore her.

The shaky moans grew louder, until the door to her room opened and Tara padded in, sniffling and jumping her breaths while she clutched Mikey close. Now, it was of no use. Samantha lowered her hands from her ears and picked her head up to see her sister coming up to her bedside.

“Sammy…” she whined, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I–I… I wa-hant…”

Before she could finish her broken sentences, Sam pushed her covers down and sat up with a sigh. This made Tara start to whimper again, fearful that her last resort would shut her out too. She took her hand and began to guide her towards the door, but the younger just started to break down again.

“I wa-haanna sleep with yo-hou, Sammy!” The little girl was too tired to try and hold herself back, so she was pulled against her will.

“Shhh, I know, Tara. Come on,” Sam continued to hush her as she tugged her past the threshold. She could hear her start to wheeze when she sucked in breaths, her asthma catching up with her from the inability to calm herself down.

But the other hadn’t realized it yet. She was too focused on wanting her way. “I do-hon’t wanna be by myself!” she sobbed, wiping her tears away with Mikey’s marbled faux fur.

“You’re not,” her older sister assured her, “I’m gonna sleep with you.” This seemed to make her start to calm down, sniffling and giving quiet moans to stabilize her crying onslaught. Once they got to her bedside, the taller girl picked her up and put her on the bed. “Lay down. I’ll be right back, okay?”

Tara only gave a partial nod as Sam left the room to grab the tissue box from the bathroom. When she came back into the room, she shut the door and climbed up on the bed to settle next to the recovering occupier, who had willingly got under the covers and was facing her.

She blinked up through drying tears. “Sammy, m-my tummy… hurts,” she complained.

So she wasn’t just pulling strings after all. “I know. It’s because you cried for a long time,” she answered, then went to pull a tissue out from the box, “You know how you have a hard time breathing so you swallow all of the snot in your throat to breathe again?”

Tara nodded.

“All of that snot goes into your tummy and makes it hurt.”

“I… I feel full, too…”

Sam nodded, “Yeah, so don’t swallow it anymore.” She then held the tissue up to her sibling’s nose. “Blow.” She did, and then, she went on to wipe the excess snot draining from her runny nose. “Good girl.” As Tara took in a deep breath to get an adequate amount of air, the other tucked the used tissue into the space between the pillows. “Better?”

Another nod had her placing the tissue box aside and laying down next to her baby sister. She tugged the blankets up to her shoulder and watched Tara roll onto her back to breathe better, where she softly pawed her throat, a small whimper emitting from it. “Remember what Mama said to do,” she reminded, knowing she was scared of having an asthma attack, “Smell the roses, then blow out the birthday candles.”

And her little sister obeyed, taking a deep breath in through her nose, then letting it out of her mouth.

“Slower, Tara. You can breathe. You’re okay.”

She did so, finding it easier when Sam did it with her. She fiddled with Mikey’s fur while curling and relaxing her toes as she repeated the cycle, a tactic used to decompress her muscles as well.

Eventually, after many breathing cycles and a few tissues, she was able to exhibit a normal breath pattern, making her feel more at ease. But there was still one problem.

Samantha, on the same hand, had relaxed too, the tactical exercise having her nearly falling asleep. She stirred herself awake. “You getting sleepy yet?” she asked as she suppressed a yawn behind her hand.

But Tara turned her head to look at her with her still-wide-awake puppy eyes. “My tummy still hurts…” she confessed.

Her big sister moved closer to her with a gentle grunt. “It’ll stop hurting in a little bit.” She laid her head down and shut her eyes. Beneath the blanket, she reached her hand over to place it over the gist of the younger’s stomach, where she began to rub in a small circle. “Does it hurt here?”

“Mm-hmm,” was the reply. The little girl tugged her arms up to allow the caressing hand to do its work as she sank into her pillow while holding her stuffed cat close to her face. “Mama always gives me tummy rubs whenever it hurts,” she whispered.

Eyes still closed, Sam smiled with a short chuckle, “I know.” She knew that was true from seeing it many times. She knew Tara milked stomach aches from time-to-time, just so their mother would hold her. As weird as it might be, being petted like that made her baby sister feel secure. It calmed her down, kinda like a dog. “I don’t think I do it as good as Mom though,” she joked.

Tara giggled. “That’s okay. It still feels good.” She blinked at her sister’s closed eyes, happy that she wasn’t alone anymore.

“You better not be faking,” the other then opened one eye to glance at the smile on her face.

The younger’s face dropped. “I’m not!”

“You fake stomach aches to Mom all the time, I know you do.”

“Do not!”

“Do too!”

“Liar!”

“Faker!”

“Meanie!”

If she was going to name-call like that, Sam was sure she was feeling better, and she slipped the hand that was caressing her sibling’s abdomen beneath her shirt to tickle her bare, on the offense.

Tara squealed and drowned into laughter as she tried to shove her hand away. “No-ho-ho! Sa-hammy!” She twisted onto her side to curl into herself, then reached out to retaliate, snaking her little fingers into her attacker’s neck.

The new victim pulled her shoulders forward in an awkward block, beginning to snicker herself. But then that caused Tara to move one of her hands to her open underarm, which made her shriek. She then made use of her other hand, which she plunged into the side of the younger’s neck, the side between the pillow that would make it hard to block.

Tara squirmed against the mattress, outdone by aged-strength. She kicked out, inadvertently catching Sam off-guard and having her tickling cease. This made her defend harder, moving her hands from her sister’s neck and underarm to her ribs, sides, anywhere she could to prove her dominance.

Now, both sisters were in hysterics, trying to get the upper hand from each other, which was a losing game. So, Sam took the initiative to break it up. “Oka-hay, Ta-hara-ha! Stop! We-he need to slee-he-he-heep!” She pulled her hands away and pulled her arms close to her in order to prove her surrender.

Luckily, her sister took it, and backed off as well, her laughter fading to leave a sleepy smile. She may not have been ready to go back to sleep after crying so much, but after all of that, she was tired.

Samantha panted, readjusting her clothing that had been disheveled from the fight. Tara didn’t seem to care about hers, so when they reverted to lying on their sides, facing each other, she took it upon herself to tug her shirt down and her shorts up.

When they both recovered, the older sibling settled with a content sigh, while the younger one nestled into her pillow with a soft hum. At first, Sam had shut her eyes to welcome the recurrence of sleep, but something possessed her to open them again. And when she raised them to check on Tara, she had done the same.

Her baby sister blinked, the flood of tears that had once ruled her having left no trace on her precious face. “I love you, Sammy.”

The other smiled and tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her ear. “I love you too, Tara.”

Tara shuffled closer to her and nuzzled Mikey’s fur. She felt safe, happy, and sleepy now that she was with her sister. When her mother and father wouldn’t be there to give her that security, she knew Sam would always be there. “Promise you’ll stay with me all night?” she quizzed, knowing she’d usually leave in the early morning, before the sun came up, so their parents wouldn’t know.

Sam nodded, her tired blink not strong enough to pull her into darkness before she was able to promise, “Until the morning light.”

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#parkerwrites #scream #sam carpenter #tara carpenter #scream vi #carpenter sisters #scream v #scream movies #scream fanfiction #scream fanfic #pre-movie #christina carpenter #mr. carpenter #ben carpenter #AU: The Way I Am #blackwolfstabs

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readychilledwine · 9 months ago

Note

we want the juicy details on your sexual awakening

It's not that juicy. It's actually fairly sad, but someone else may be at this point and need to hear it.

Warning - questionable consent, technically a form of sex work, total power exchange, abusive relationships, mental health issues, learning to adapt, and becoming a survivor instead of a victim.

I was a really really good kid and teen. Like I addressed, I got my kicks from fanfiction. I dated once in high school, and it never went further than kissing (which caused my first break up and broken heart). My first "What is happening to my body," came from watching The Mummy, and it wasn't something I could discuss with anyone besides my older brother who did the best he could to try to talk to me about safe sex.

I moved away from my parents in 2014 and went to a college about 4 hours away. Aka- close enough to mom and dad to drive home once every couple months, not close enough for them to randomly show up. I was an art major focusing on art history and visual design, and that required me to take a life drawing class.

Tender 18 year old Liz, a starving college student working two jobs, ended up catching the eye of one of the male models, and we started talking a lot. I found out after a month of him taking me on dates, surprising me with gifts, and him staying up with me when I'd be lonely because I didn't live on campus have friends, that he was married and him and his wife were looking for a girlfriend for him since she had a boyfriend on the side. I don't regret this choice because it shaped who I am today, but I stupidly agreed to go into it without having set my own boundaries and limits.

He had rules for me. Rules I can recite clearly to this day: he dresses me, I do not make financial choices without him, I am to tell him where I was at all times and leave my tracker on, he decides what I eat and when, no drinking, no smoking, and no other partners. If I listened, he would pay my tuition, books, help with rent, etc. At the time, I did not realize that I was entering a total power exchange dynamic, and he knew that.

Those starter rules evolved into more... sex based rules, and after 3 months, I ended up losing my virginity to him after he told me refusing was breaking his rules, and if I broke his rules, my allowance was cut off, and I really needed help with rent, friends. I am not proud of that decision, but that decision was made.

I stayed in this relationship with him hanging financial security and my own naivety over my head for close to 10 months. My dad is a law enforcement officer, and he is the one who noticed the change in my personality and looks.

I had waist length dark brown hair. I came home blonde with my hair cut to my lower neck. I stopped wearing Converse and Vans and started wearing heels and sandles more. I would get really anxious and upset if I wasn't near my phone or could not find it to meet my required check-ins. I cried. Alot. Yelling made me actually panic. My dad made me sit down with a female investigator and answer questions about everything.

When she was done and confirmed to him what was happening, he then proceeded to get my brothers, a uHaul, and my apartment keys and move me back home. He had my phone bill at that point, so he blocked the couple, her boyfriend, and their friends that I had the displeasure of meeting and ensured I never heard from them again.

Cohearsed consent is not consent. The second I started therapy and realized that, I spiraled. The weight of everything set in, and I realized I had been a victim of sexual assault. I began to cope by being hypersexual. Within a year, I'd had sex with close to 30 people trying to reclaim my body and, in turn, endangering myself until I met my ex fiancé.

When I met him, things changed significantly. He was a stepping stone in my healing and helped me find religion and value in myself beyond my body. Ironically, my healing and finding the wrong religion (catholics don't seem to be a fan of spirituality) is what led to our engagement being called off. I was 21 when we stopped seeing each other.

I slowed down at that point signicantly and cut off all sex. I was done with it and decided never again. I could please me better than anyone else could anyways. Then, I met baby daddy, and we started as strictly friends with benefits. He is the safest dom I've ever had, the kindest man I've ever met, and from the bat, he understood me more than I understood me. He saw me for me and cared for me despite the damaged goods.

He triggered the true awakening. We took sex between us slow, exploring things gently, talking about what I wanted to try and keeping track of what I liked, what he liked, and meeting in a happy middle. He indulged my want to explore with other women and just sat and watched. Then, when we felt I was ready, he introduced me to the swinging/bdsm lifestyle, and it helped me process the remaining bits of trauma I had with him beside me every step of the way. He helped shape me sexually into who I needed to be to heal and then who I deserved to be sexually for me.

I don't know at what point FwB turned into us living together and telling each other how much the other means to us almost daily, but now we're here, cuddling on couch, exhausted from taking care of our daughter, and discussing which one of us gets the last chocolate peanut butter overnight oats packet and *whispers* marriage.

Him and Sophia are the happy ending 18 year old Liz thought she was losing when she was desperate to pay rent. He helped me heal, learn who I was in terms of sex, and gave me the safest place to land.

One might say I'm pretty attached to him forever now 🤣

Ps - let me tell ya, missionary isn't boring when it's with someone who thinks you're the most beautiful woman he's ever seen, pregnancy stretch marks, and all. 💕

#elizabeths.updates #send asks #send anons

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