#i fucking love being in the lgbtq+ community!!! we're so cool!!!

[lgbtqtext]

[jerzwriter]

You are so fucking disgusting Elsa. Using your bland ass straight white bitch MC to be the MC of the Month for Pride Month.

You’ve gone really low

Good morning, Nonny.

I'd like to say hope you're having a good day, but clearly, you're not.

I was 50/50 on putting this in my "delete because Nonny is a bitter troll who doesn't deserve the attention/exposure they desperately crave" file. But this anon goes beyond the usual "I'm a pathetic human who hates someone on the internet who has zero impact on my life so much because of (insert stupid/insane reason here), so I'm going to be a vile bully and send them anonymous hate because - IDK - I can't find a good therapist? I'm off my meds? I'm just a vile piece of shit?" See, I no longer waste my time or energy on those.

But I decided to answer this because a) you're wrong, and b) you're engaging in bi-erasure - something that happens in the fandom and in real life every day, and I'm not going to pass up a chance to educate your ignorance and address your bigotry.

Casey was picked at random - the same way all MCOTMs and WOTMs are. I grappled with the decision to highlight her bisexuality... because of people like you. In the end, I decided to be true to the character. I've been dealing with people like you my entire life - in my personal life - never mind fandom. So let's educate.

Bisexuality is real - people.

Your ignorance in understanding it doesn't make it any less real. I am proudly bi, but trust me, it feels like a pretty shitty thing to be at times. You're never queer enough for many in the queer community, but you're too queer for those who aren't. There is no real safe space outside of a precious few who get it. And I mean few.

Your straight friends talk shit about you "doing this" to be "cool/get attention" or whatever... and they're "relieved" when you're in a hetero-presenting relationship. Your queer friends are happiest when you're with a same-sex partner, and if you're not, they accuse you of lying about who you are or "hiding." It's awesome. You know, instead of just having friends that are fucking happy if you're happy. People CAN BE and ARE attracted to more than one gender and the feelings/love we have toward both are real, valid and do not have to be explained to anyone.

Anyone who follows my MC (and I don't believe Nonny has) knows that Casey has been presented as bisexual from the day I entered this fandom. If some choose to ignore that, that's on them, not me. The fact that she is half of a pairing that is hetero-presenting does not make her any less bisexual. How ignorant are you?

Her profile clearly states she's bi. I've written about her being an activist for LGBTQ rights and about her reluctance about coming out to her parents (because she doesn't believe she should have to "come out," why is straight the default?). I've introduced her ex-girlfriend, Jessica, in fics and text fics, and discussed Casey's identity at length in numerous asks over the years.

So, yes, her current partner is a man, and he ends up being the love of her life. GUESS WHAT! THAT HAPPENS TO BI PEOPLE! And, TRUST, we know the privilege that comes with being in a hetero-presenting relationship. I've never once had someone throw something at me or hurl slurs when I've held a male partner's hand in public, but I've had it happen when my partner is a woman. But no one bi is "suddenly straight" because of it! And asking us to parade as hetero just because we're with an opposite-sex partner is pushing us into a closet - and I'm sorry, but fuck you - because no one belongs there.

Last June, I deliberately avoided all pride-related events in the fandom (NOT in real life). I did so because I was coping with the guilt that is tantamount to being bisexual. The "Should I put it out there. I mean, there are others who are more queer, right? I have no right to do this? Their characters are more important than mine, right?" And yeah, I've felt that way in real life, too. THIS is what it's like being bi. I'm out for decades, I'm comfortable and proud of who I am, I counsel younger people in the community that they are valid - and I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes right now because with all of that, THIS SHIT STILL CREEPS IN - largely because of s-bags like this Nonny.

So you know what, I'm not grappling with it anymore. It's pride month, and in real life, I'm celebrating to the fucking max. And you know what - I'm doing it in the fandom too. Casey is going to be as out and fucking proud as I want her to be, and if it makes your ass uncomfortable, well, that's not my fucking problem.

Re-read your ask, Nonny. The only disgusting person in this exchange is you. Do fucking better.

[deathspeaker]

My Queer Thoughts

It's completely valid to hate the word queer, to consider it a slur (especially if you grew up in an era when it WAS a violent slur.) or not like it.

What bothers me is when people want to blanketly fight against it's use, especially when they're young and very online.

I grew up in the era of 'That's so gay' being the most common thing to fall out of teen and young men's mouths for anything bad or that they didn't like.

Any word we could use to describe ourselves can and will be turned into a slur. I love dyke, but I've also received threats with that word used in it.

Without the word 'queer' it would not only take a LOT of words I would then have to explain all those different terms. Sure someone in the community or in the know would get it right away, but to anyone on the outside it becomes this exhausting experience. I've watched as people's eyes glaze over and can feel the disrespect oozing off of them.

Also I kind of enjoy telling someone 'I'm queer' and watching as they try to figure out what that means and making up their idea of what it means. I rather be a source of confusion.

I also like 'queer' because it has a use outside of LGBTQ+ folks. Faggot is heavily censored, and a lot of people in the community view it as less hateful than queer, but one can be said openly on youtube, and the other can't (without risk of demonization or shadow banning the video).

We're a diverse community, largely interconnected purely because we are seen as 'different' and 'abnormal'. So of course a cis-lesbian is going to have different feelings around things than a trans-lesbian. Different lived experiences. And intersex people are often lumped in (that's a complicated issue and just shows how fucked up the binary can be)

I'm not cis. I'm not straight. My partner is in a queer relationship even if he is cis-straight (I'm his second trans partner, I love this man he's never questioned his sexuality or felt insecure about dating two different trans people!).

It's fine if you don't like the word queer, block it! That's cool! That's fine! Especially if you have trauma attached to it! Protect yourself from things that make you feel uncomfortable, unhappy, and especially traumatic shit.

But also respect that other people have a different lived experience. It is impossible for the great diversity of people to avoid saying, saying, or existing in a way that doesn't cause issues with others. Ranging from being annoying to being reminders of trauma. That's just a fucking fact of life.

[alexwatchesshows]

Grace & Frankie S1E9 review

Spoilers for up to and including S1E9.

Why can't these people fucking communicate??? I mean, we're getting there but it's baby steps. Frankie is finally taking control over her life, which is good to see, but the way Jacob is just existing in the background shows she has a lot of work to do. Guy is really just an NPC to me. He does very little other than help Grace's character development, but he's pretty good at that to be fair.

For me, the highlight of this episode is Barry. I unironically love Barry so much-- he's so sweet and genuine and even with all we've got so far the way his and Brianna's personalities compliment each other is really cool.

We also get our third queer character in this episode (Adam), which brings me onto a discussion that I want to have about this show: is this a queer show? Now, right out the gate, I do want to say that I love this show, it's one of my comfort shows, and not every piece of media has to do everything all the time. That being said, I don't see this as a queer show. The only queer characters we get throughout are cis gay men (with the exception of 2 lesbians much later). There's a real lack of diversity in anything other than age and it doesn't really do a great job of portraying the LGBTQ+ community in its entirety. Nevertheless, I think the portrayal of older queer characters is also very important, and this show does it pretty well, so there are pros and cons. I might come back to this theme/discussion later in the show, but I thought I'd lay out some ideas here and now.

[ultimate-marysue]

Oooh, we're airing our Campaign 1 and 2 Hot Takes™???? Because I have a few:

-Whenever Sam's character reveals to not be a two dimensional parody everyone acts like they never saw them as such...but their posts complaining about them being just jokes the week prior are still there. Same for Jester, you just have zero faith in the cast sometimes.

-The fandom baits itself with some queer couples. Like, sure, Shadowgast and Vaxmore had a base. In fact they're both canon (one as an epilogue the other as exs). But the way the fandom took Gilmore (and Essek) and obsessed over them week after week when they weren't even in the shower and then act surprised when Vax moved on is absurd. Sure, to you it was only this morning the last time you read a long meta on Essek's feelings for Caleb, but in game it's been months since they last talked. Stop building your expectations so much and then be mad that the canon differs.

-Tary is underappreciated as fuck. He had a banger of an arc, great story and was super cool LGBTQ rep (a little bit basic, but still great). In fact people always forget him when talking about Critical role's LGBTQ+ characters

-Also, people misgdendering Molly and Kingsley...just why. This fandom likes to be all preachy but at the same time they do this kinda shit. And sure, I'm not going to cancel anyone for a honest mistake. But don't attack the cast for things of the same caliber while denying you've ever done something like that. We all screw up at some point, and if you refuse to admit it, I don't trust you.

-People give Fjord a lot of shit for sleeping with Avantika when he only did it to get some information. While we're at it, I don't like the treatment of that moment in general. Caleb pressuring Fjord into sex with someone his scared of could have been a very interesting conversation on consent, but since Fjord's a dude no one questions that he liked it and done.

-The guests are super lovely and I feel really bad whenever the fandom shits on them for not playing at the same level that the other profesional players at the table. Specially the way people treated Aimee in Exu was wild. She didn't knew the game but still managed to be an excellent roleplayer, not afraid of playing a deeply flawed character as her first (in front of such a massive audience). And people still get mad at her for mechanical details I-

-Fuck all of you being biphobic towards Vax. Not only was he attracted to various NPCs (most notably Gilmore) but he also joked about it in different occasions (most notably, the love potion bit). While we're at it, Scanlan being bi (while part of a joke) was collectively ignored by a big chunk of the fandom, and so was Vex's bisexuality too. Sure, they came out because of jokes, but like so did most of my irl friend group????

-Just, in general the way the fandom treats discourse in general. people act as if every character has to say "hi, I'm Molly, I'm nonbinary and bisexual" for it to be canon. I swear, I will see a post shitting on Vax's bisexuality with thousands of likes and the next one is someone telling a non binary critter to std for saying that it pronouns for J'mon Sa Ord were not the best option. Sometimes you manage to simultaneously speak over LGBTQ+ and POC critters so you can "defend them", while also shutting down their valid constructive criticism.

-While we're at it, criticism. I've seen really cool posts about race, sexuality, gender and feminism from the critter community. This are posts that point out micro aggressions or stereotypes so that the cast can be better. If no one points out something, how the he will you fix it?? They have sensitivity consultants (at least now), but things can always be better.

And then there's that part of the fandom that assumes bad faith from the cast in every single mistake (or perceived mistake). People telling them how they should roleplay their characters and play their game. Bitch, and I mean this disrespectfully, find your own game if you want to play it so bad.

-THE MISOGYNY. Just, wtf. Why do people treat the female cast and the female characters like that?????? The infantilization, the demonization, just the whole deal of judging them differently. I know it is hard to admit that we have this double standard imbedded deep inside us because *society*, but come on. It's just ridiculous and it makes me too upset to even speak about it. I want to make a long post on this someday but, just not today.

-People interpreting things their way (totally valid) and getting mad when the cast had different intentions all along (fuck off). Jesus Christ, just for the love of God and everything Holy, admit you want to play your own game and leave the rest of us alone. Some of you have not played D&D and it shows. It's a roleplaying game in which people do whatever the hell they want. The rest of the annoying crowd is D&D people I would rather die than play with. I don't want to be in a table were people are going to get mad at me when I have different ideas than what they intended.

-Critical Role getting big is not some sort of betrayal. We made them big, now they are big. Easy. If you want to support only the most indie games, go support them and leave us alone.

-Also, stop acting like "being big" means that you can just send hate to the cast. When they answer you always act like they are being super mean because your just a teeny tiny Twitter account and they are famous. Look, if thousands of you keep saying "Keyleth is shit" it's normal that one of you is getting QRT with a "stf" from the cast. They are still people, and you're the one's at Goulet for them not interacting as much ,(which apparently you hate)

-Having said all this, I don't get mad about this shit on a daily basis because I curate my TL to only have people I like and that don't engage on toxic fandom bullshit. If fandom is hindering your enjoyment of the show, use the block button.

[wistfulrat]

this week’s fics! feat. bakeries, bookshops, bisexual awakenings of the angsty and fluffy sort, wolfstar goddads being tender as hell, desi harry reconnecting with his culture, domestic drarry, a lap dance set to akon’s smack that, and more!

But That’s History by @ebbet - 54k - T Harry Potter starts his first year as Muggle Studies Professor only to find that Draco Malfoy has been hired to teach History of Magic.

listen to me. this is one of the funniest drarry fics i've ever read. i was cackling in my bed at 2am because harry’s internal monologues throughout this fic are unhinged. insanely quotable. “what was he, a lothario” and “you were crushing me with your muscular thighs!” are lines that live rent free in my empty head. harry has never played anything cool a day in his life. there’s a faculty meeting where the teachers are planning the yule ball and debating the merits of a DJ when harry decides he must defend his muggle-music-loving honor by dancing seductively to akon’s smack that while a blushing draco loses his mind. i fucking screamed. and the best part is that in between the comedic scenes threading the overall story, you have extremely tender moments of like, padma patil helping harry become a more rooted desi by sharing their cultural traditions, harry proudly donning his sherwani. draco wrestling with his past, going to harry’s lgbtq+ club for students, being sheepish with ron and hermione. ugh, comedic writers with emotional depth are clever and talented as hell!!

Realities, Unfurling by @ebbet - 45k - M Draco Malfoy is released from Azkaban into a changed world.

incredible collage-fic told from multiple povs. 8yrs post-war and everything’s changed. the current state of the magical world unfolds via slice-of-life snapshots from a truly stunning cast. non-binary harry whom is running a non-prof org dedicated to building tolerance and establishing equality for marginalized identities. post-prison-release draco whose life will be changed by the internet. neville’s tender relationship with blaise. andromeda’s fiercely protective mothering. remus and sirius being alive and very hot and just, the tender goddads harry deserved. cho chang being brilliant. baker pansy’s softened edges. found families abound. harry being flustered by their crush on draco and making personalized playlists on an iPod nano.

that all might sound narratively cluttered but the author more than pulls this off. glorious, start to finish.

Knead by @jovialobservationanchor (an @hd-erised​ fic) - 83k - E This is not a story about Harry renovating Grimmauld Place. This is a story about coffee shops and brewpubs, about Ginny and Luna on a farm with creatures, about magical Oregon, coastal road trips, flying, friendship, and Draco Malfoy's lean arms.

cinematic. a love letter to oregon’s expansive landscapes and lively cities. it’s harry finding home in unexpected places and people. in the vast silence of rolling fields, endless coasts, and starry night skies big enough to feel like you’re adrift in space. and it’s also the lingering, intimate quiet of early mornings in a bakery, sitting on a park bench overlooking the city as you eat ice cream next to your crush. it’s harry watching ginny and luna dance and work around each other like bees. it’s the slow unfolding of harry and draco’s relationship as they fill each other’s quiet. finishing this fic is like waking from a good dream. transporting, immersive, lovely. 

Harry Potter and the Bisexual Awakening by @writcraft - 20k - E Harry is perfectly content being single, heterosexual and living in Godric's Hollow with his very clingy rescue dog, Snitch. When Draco Malfoy turns up on Harry's doorstep demanding that Harry teach him how to drive, things quickly become a lot more complicated.

first of all, i feel very seen by draco being a gay-who-can’t-drive. it’s called representation. but mostly i love the ease of harry and draco’s banter, a flustered harry discovering his sexuality, and the way this fic addresses biphobia. also very emo over this exchange: “I think I might be scared of you, but probably not for the reasons you think.” “Yes.” Draco stares at Harry. “I think I might be scared of you too.”

Forged through flowing water by @tedahfromtayla (an @hd-erised​ fic) - 40k - E When Hermione sets up a diplomatic mission to begin repairing the damage British colonisation did to Indian magical communities Harry isn’t going to pass on the opportunity to visit and help his family’s home country. Maybe he should have asked a few more questions about the personnel she had recruited for it before signing on because Malfoy surely has an ulterior motive to be there.

so much to love about this fic. the beautiful settings, from kolkata to mumbai, to the holi festival and colorful lively streets, to remote cave settlements and old intricate temples. it’s harry in the homeland, reconnecting to his family’s heritage and confronting the weight of imperialism in his history. it’s nipping the white savior complex in the bud. this part: That is what England left behind. That is what it still stands for, despite whatever mask of respectability and honour it presents. . .You don't get to step aside and let someone else deal with the mess. You have to listen and learn and then act, Malfoy, you need to learn how to fix your own mess. This is why we're here. my indigenous ass cheered. HP certainly sells the british fantasy but HP fanfic?? fuck jkr, fuck the crown. i love that this fic doesn’t romanticize england’s history. i love that we get to see the vast resilience and beauty of post-colonial india.

Purity Control by yrfrndfrnkly - 28k - T In which Harry tries to ignore his trauma with fantasy Quidditch but Malfoy's Thereness™ is distracting and all his classmates want to talk about are unicorns, virginity, and Muggle music.

tender 8th year fics where they go from bristly as fuck to understanding and soft 100% guaranteed to make me emo as hell. all the teens have traumas and no one wants to talk about it but eventually Things are Talked About. it’s good of the adults to finally notice. everyone just wants someone to hold their hand. and this part: “You’re the only person around here who’s a bigger mess than I am.” “I thought maybe we could be a mess together,” pls don’t look at me as i weep over their gentle empathy.

Advent, a comic by dustmouth - WIP - T It's Harry and Draco's first Christmas together and Draco is determined to live his full yuletide fantasy, come hell or high water.

dustmouth, patron saint of whimsical drarry. whose illustrations singlehandedly reinvented wizarding fashion. whose cheeky and tender comics are like a soothing balm to the utter depravity of this carnal world. harry and draco being domestic, draco’s xmas spirit brand being “traditional unhinged”!! extremely my shit. we’ll absolutely be reading this all december.

Little Spaces by @dracoladon and @lazywonderlvnd​ - WIP - E Draco's back from France and working on the spell damage ward at St Mungo's with Hermione, who invites him over for dinner. Without telling Harry. This is a roleplay, which means Harry is written by one author (lazywonderland) and Draco by another (dracoladon).

the switch in distinct character voices works so well for this fic!! tonally i feel like i'm watching an episode of the office. i personally love harry and draco being Pissed Off at how much they want to bone each other. the battle of the tapenade was the most riveting dinner scene i've read in a minute. clever, hilarious, emotionally tense. can’t wait until that inevitable moment post hate-sex when they’re gonna be like “oh noooo it’s a Heart Boner as well!! >:((” hell ya we’re subscribing for chapter updates.

Dragons Don’t Know Paradise by @teacup-tai​ - WIP - E In 2004, when Remus spends two scary weeks in the ITU due to complications of pneumonia and his HIV condition, Sirius walks around the house like a ghost and Harry finds comfort and strength in Draco through a chat in an online LGBT forum. Harry falls for him, but Draco has a lot of secrets and, before long, will need to come clean—even if he believes that no one is able to understand a dragon.

non-magical bookshop AU. remus and sirius’ relationship is a marvel. the ease of their affection with harry makes me so emo. draco’s friends being insistently present even as he tries to isolate himself. this is a story about acceptance, found families, and falling in love at a distance. the intimacy, the longing, the tenderness. what a fic!! i keep coming back to this part:...he looks at ease, inside his body, a body he needed to fight for. He’d made peace with his struggles and his scars. And Draco realises he wants that. He wants to be at ease inside his body, the body that now carries a virus. He wants to be at peace with his own existence. you hurt for draco so deeply but you get moments like these where he affords himself a kindness that feels foreign and it’s just!! the boys navigating grief and learning to be vulnerable. so good.

[thetiredstuff]

Speaking of old rumors that people read as J2 but could have very easily I found a while back. We're going underground for this, 'cause sensitive stuff, if true. C'mon downstairs with me...

So a while back, I found this blind item: https://href.li/?https://crasstalk.com/2012/04/blind-items-11/

These two costars from a hit network television [show] are both closeted, but very much in love. They have not acted on their feelings, but spend all of their time together. Last week, one star told the other he was willing to risk everything to come out together as a couple. As a result of this confession, the other star has broken off the relationship and refuses to acknowledge or spend any more time with the man he is in love with. Both men are heartbroken.

hi! the way this starts is so hahahahaha creepy hahahaha i can't hahahaha

as for the actual content: well first off i don't know what that blog is but posting shit about someone's life that they'd rather stay quiet whether they're a celebrity or not is just mean and invasive. i'm not just talking about what your text involves but those other two "revelations" in that post.

second: this is especially really fucking shitty when it comes to someone being part of the lgbtq+ community and not being out. this post doesn't name any names but just giving vague details about someone who is queer but isn't out is just really fucking shitty.

third: that post is from apparently 2012. spn literally ran until 2020. i doubt that if that post was about j2 either one of them would have kept signing on because they very clearly still were talking and still were friends until a few years ago when it seemed to cool down

all in all: just don't gossip, or vaguely reference supposedly queer celebs that aren't out yet cuz it's just shitty.

[pengu-hours]

i failed uni my first two semesters because i had really severe depression and anxiety and problems with my medication and couldn't cope with online classes because of my adhd. sigh. i wanted to take a gap year so that didn't happen but my mom kinda tricked me into doing it fresh out of highschool, which is fine and i understand now why she did it (still a little mad, but this makes me the third person in our family to go to college and students who take a gap year tend not to go to college), but i've always known i belong in college and getting a higher education. i know it's what i need and want to do and there's literally nothing else i want to do. i love to learn, i loved my biology class every week, i loved my history class, i just stopped showing up because i got so depressed and anxious. i have a lot of trauma from being class of 2020 and getting my senior year of high school stripped from me, and i definitely was not ready for college. i wanted to come back to classes this spring, but i finally decided i'm gonna take the gap year i need and try to get everything together first. i lost scholarships and stuff because of my gpa drop since i failed quite literally every single class. so, i have to work for the extra money now, which my family can definitely not afford, we're very very broke and can barely keep a roof over our heads. i always kinda knew when i became an adult it would be really rough, but i never expected it to be quite this bad. i am grateful for the connections i did make and the friends i now have from my first two semesters, so it's not like all hope is lost, but it really is difficult. i just suck at classes that i have to do online. i'll probably have to use the printers a lot this time. since i do have adhd though, i get student disability benefits. so, hopefully, with everything, and the fact i'm trying to get autism tests and stuff as well will also be good.

sorry for the really long rant, but here's the good parts i came to love about college:

doing extracurriculars gets you friends, and it's not hard to make those friends. even if you're anxious.

there aren't really as many "cliques" because a lot of us don't really know each other, heh. i have all sorts of friends.

the foreign programs!! there's so many students on campus that are asian or european and it's so fucking cool to meet them and talk to them. one of my best friends i made is korean, and from busan :)

the professors are usually really chill. even the really strict ones tend to soften up. several of mine i kinda attached to immediately because they were in subjects i like and because i was ahead of my level in a lot of those classes since i didn't transfer my high school credits.

the disability services, a lot of them are so so sweet. you can get a lot of benefits and they really do work with you.

lgbtq community! my campus is a safe space and there's so much freedom to just be yourself on campus.

jobs!!! our campus is really good about letting students get jobs and stuff. a lot of the jobs on campus also have basic benefits, like if you're an RA for a dorm, you get your own dorm room (normally for 2 people) all to yourself.

it's overall one of the best places i've ever been. i wasn't bullied for the first time in my life, all my quirks just made me myself and nobody ever got mad at me for them. people would just talk to me regardless of knowing me and then i would recognize them in class and it just made me feel so much safer. my professors loved me, despite all i was going through. i really was a hard worker, but i just couldn't keep up. they never ever held it against me or discriminated against me. being in college felt like... freedom. it really did. walking across campus with kids with all the same goals as you, seeing so many different people. it's so amazing. it gets stressful, yes, but i'll never forget the pure wonder i felt when i stepped into campus for the first time with my student id and went to classes and just felt like "hey, i belong here" and wasn't afraid of getting shoved into things or bullied or made fun of. people were so nice and kind and i just enjoyed every single experience every time. i loved to get coffee and people watch. i studied in the same spot every day and met so many people just from simple things. it's not to say i never had bad days on campus or had bad experiences, because i did, but i really, wholeheartedly, love my college, and i'm so glad that i picked the school i did.

i also dropped out of college but i never said why. instead, i told them i wanted a career change and the lecturers going on strike was a nice cover up for my actual reason; i was failing uni for a second year

uni scares me ngl, i've had so many of my friends drop out bc of the stress and i'm easily stressed :(((( i'd give up easily...