#i feel like someone else wrote it
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tell me why im finally working on my wip that i haven't had time to work on since the summer so i completely forgot everything id written and im rereading random parts and im like this is adorable and so good wtf??!!
#i feel like someone else wrote it#its actually such a fun read im so happy with my past self rn#its at p much exactly the halfway point so im gonna try to work on it slowly over the next few months and have it done before i move#alternatively i will finish it over the summer after i move#i literally cant wait to finish it and send it to clara to read though#plus i think this one will be MUCH easier to find beta readers for that my last project lmao#yes sounds v v v braggy but im just happy and feeling happy is nice:)
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the way this website treats disabled people is actually horrendous
#yes even the ''progressive'' types always love to imply that literal symptoms of disability#means someone is lazy or that its a moral failing or that they should simply just stop#and the sheer NUMBER of autistic people shitting on other autistic people with higher support needs than them#or who ''act'' more autistic or just have more unpalatable inconvenient or annoying symptoms than them#that cannot be treated like just a quirky trait that makes them more interesting or cute or whatever#i think i wrote like. 2 posts on that where its more coherent than here idk#''this is the autism website'' no. i don't think i feel very welcome here.#mine#yomipost#ableism#actually autistic#i guess other people can add on if they want cause im not gonna be able to articulate much else than that
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Okay okay hold on.
You’re telling me that Derek Hale is living in Beacon Hills owning an auto shop and consulting for the sheriff and having a rebellious teenage son who loves the jeep and in the first twenty seconds of being on screen Derek says to the sheriff “Maybe you should call your son?” Like I literally paused it.
Seriously considering keeping it paused and just writing a fanfic to finish it out because this is a beautiful premise that right now is canon. I accept the first 20 minutes of this movie. The rest we can toss.
#teen wolf spoilers#yes I’m watching it#might take me a few days#to watch it in small increments#everything else is ridiculously laughably the dumbest#like I laughed#like they just subbed in someone for Kira???#and the ‘badass’ camera shots and characters and literally laughable#and they used ‘we call him the alpha’ line twice in five minutes like it was not good the first time#I feel like I’m watching a movie script a teenager wrote with things they thought would sound cool#also why is Derek investigating fires#not cool#derek hale#stiles stilinski#teen wolf#sterek#spoilers#teen wolf movie
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(ASOS, Sansa II)
(ASOS, Jon XII)
#jonsa#jon x sansa#sansa stark#jon snow#don’t tell me they mean nothing to each other when they have such glaring parallels#it’s the way no one else in the series has this exact dream to restore Winterfell and have a little starkling family#in the same book mind you !!#the way Robb is the missing piece to Sansa’s fantasy <33#and Jon and Sansa don’t mention each other because they’ll be parents#oh the feelings I have#sometimes there was even a girl who looked like arya#and arya is known to resemble Jon really closely#implying that Sansa wants to marry someone of the north with stark features#which makes so much sense for her character arc to BE with someone born and raised in the north#not another random lord to exploit her claim and power#see this is why I wrote a 40 paged meta analysis and compiled it into a PowerPoint#and then presented it to my mother thus converting her into a Jonsa truther#WITHOUT OBJECTION#on a side note I find it so interesting when you talk to someone who’s neutral on ships and is willing to listen to whatever theory#as objectively possible#because as soon as I pointed all the evidence out to my mum she was like woahhh you’re smart analysis and you’re so correct
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Buck + Bucky Timeline Info
For fic writers or just curious readers!
Referencing different archives and articles, I've done my best to compile John and Gale's Air Force timeline pre–England, because I feel like a lot of it gets muddied and sometimes we wanna write pre–MOTA canon events lol. Hope it comes in handy!
They meet (on or around) March 29, 1940 and become Flying Cadets at Randolph Field in Texas until August 30, 1940.
Still Flying Cadets, they move to Kelly Field in San Antonio, Texas from September 9, 1940 to November 14, 1940.
Both promoted to 2nd Lieutenant Air Corp Reserve on Nov 15, 1940. A bit unsure on the events before their next promotion, because Gale seems to have gone to Barksdale Army Air Field in LA in March of 1941 for advanced flying school, but haven't found anything on whether John went too; I'm assuming he did.
Both promoted to 1st Lieutenant, Air Corp on April 25, 1942. Not clear on whether this took place in LA or back in Texas or elsewhere.
Became instructors for the 29th Bombardment Group at McDill Air Force Field in Tampa, Florida on May 25, 1942.
Promoted to Captain and transferred to Gowan Field, Boise Idaho, but possibly at different times? All I can find is that by October they were both for sure there, but Gale was promoted to Captain on July 28, 1942 and transferred then, and John was promoted to Captain in August of 1942, but it doesn't specify when he transferred.
At Gowan Field in October of 1942, Gale was promoted to Commanding Officer for the 350th Bomb Squadron/100th Bomb Group, and John was promoted to Operations Officer for the 100th Bomb Group.
Transferred to Walla Walla Army Air Field in Washington in November of 1942.
Transferred to Wendover Army Air Field in Utah in December of 1942.
Both promoted to Majors in Sioux City, Iowa in January of 1943.
Transferred to Kearny, Nebraska (assuming to Kearney Air Force Base) in February of 1943. Cue P1 of MOTA!
In May of 1943, John traveled with an advance party to Podington, England to prepare the base for the 100th Bomb Group. On May 27 1943, Gale (with the 100th) left for Bangor, Maine. From there, he flew out across the Atlantic and arrived at Thorpe Abbotts on June 9 1943. And we know what happens from then on. :-)
If any of this is incorrect or you have extra information to add to the timeline, please let me know!! I wouldn't be surprised if I've missed things, but this is how their flight school/pre–England timeline went to the best of my knowledge. Hopefully this is helpful for some other writers too! I can throw together a timeline for their missions/events during MOTA as well if that's something anyone's interested in; it's easy enough to find mission dates in comparison to finding these pre–100th dates, but it might be nice to have them all in one place. x
#did i realize while making this that i might be a little unhinged? yep! but hopefully this saves others from having to hunt this info down#i took my adhd meds and one minute i was writing the next i was knee deep in mission archives idek how it happened#masters of the air#buckbucky#jls refs#not sure how else to tag this but i just hope it's useful to someone other than myself bc ik i've dug for accurate timelines so much!#(which is funny bc i feel like most of us don't look for inaccuracies while reading yet we're all so picky about our own so)#i actually wrote this a few days ago and completely forgot to post it oops#FUCK i meant air force not army was typing this half asleep and only realized after this started getting reblogs xoxo forgive me
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at first getting diagnosed with cptsd was like, "yay my trauma has been validated (it always was valid)!" and i really thought that was going to be it, but then i started to do research as i do whenever i realize i have something and learned that!! the way i experience socialization is!! quite horrid actually!!
#i have had this stupid fucking rule for myself for years since i was little#''dont speak unless you're spoken to or else something bad will happen. nobody wants to hear what you have to say unless they ask''#I TELL MYSELF THAT ALL THE TIME????#AND I DIDNT REALIZE IT WASNT NORMAL#thats not something that healthy people think to themselves whenever they want to talk to people. they just talk to them#they dont tell themselves not to speak to people for fear of what may happen to them jesus christ spacie#i get so scared when i message anybody ANYTHING#bc everything and anything i wanna talk about feels so stupid why would anyone give a shit#staring at a funny joke i want to send someone for 30 fucking minutes before deleting it b/c my brain is like ''errmm who cares?''#''also they're going to yell at you for wasting their time!!!''#i sent my friend a meme once and had a panic attack (or maybe a flashback?? im still trying to figure out what they are) immediately after#this shit sucks dude. it sucks#at least im processing what happened to me. thats why it hurts so bad rn its been stockpiled for like.#2 decades#im not looking for any sympathy here im just putting it out there#so that anybody who feels the same way i do know they're not alone#ive been struggling everyday for like 2 months now (actually DEFINITELY longer)#it will get better. things just need to be taken one step at a time#i have gotten thru my worst days i have a 100% success rate#how many days have i been alive#7930#lightwork#lets keep it goin#vent#trauma tw#trauma mention#wrote this post thru a flashback btw!! dealing with them is getting easier#before i would be unable to function for days at a time!!!#with one of the most recent ones i had i was so in the thick of it i avoided everyone i knew for a week cuz i was convinced#i was an evil unlovable freak that only wanted to hurt people
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AU where Zane Ninjago is the previous master of ice. like when he transferred his elemental powers over he also transferred his soul and he low-key reincarnated into this robo-body. cool beans. this means there's the potential of Zane starting to glimpse bits and pieces of past and not knowing why he can see it. the things master Wu talks about--why can he see them as if he were there?--he feels like he has experienced personally. give Zane a whole other crisis on top of after he finds out he's a nindriod not a human. this also means Zane in old clothes and styles from Master Wu's time whenever he has flashbacks which is a neat visual. like heck you could have someone other than Wu have previous villains that show up! you could balance that out a bit! Master of Ice's previous nemesis shows up ready to throw down when they discover he's technically still alive but also not. Zane questioning if this is his life at all. if he's Zane or someone else. If he was Zane before or if he was nothing. If he's Zane now or if he never was to begin with
#knox rambles#Zane Julian#Zane Ninjago#LEGO Ninjago#this'll probably not become anything big <- has said that for every au#just in case tho what are we calling this uhhh#Master of Ice...? no that makes no sense he's already the master of ice uhhhh#ice is another form of water it can never really be destroyed it just becomes something else ohhh that's good if i wrote a fic that would b#like the summary or first line talking about the different forms of water#water holds memory or whatever this would be a heavily Nya and Zane thing i can feel it#Glaciated Memory AU#because i'm needlessly fancy lets go with that yeah#WELP THERE WE GO Glaciated Memory AU good morning y'all#i haven't looked at ninjago stuff for years so the chances that someone has already made this au is high WHEEZIGNSD;FLKM
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hey writeblr I'm curious: what do you think is the most distinctive trait of your main character/s that your readers will pickup on?
#writing question#writing community#writeblr#i'm so curious#it could be physical or something else#something in the narrative like a habit or way of talking#an alternative way of asking: if someone wrote fanfic of your characters#what would they use to define those characters distinctly in text?#i'm revising hbabl and i feel like nemesis is distinctly clocked for his jackal laugh (a phrase i use exclusively for him)#and his hyena shrieks#judge is almost always lounging against something until he's not#and physically he'll always be distinguished by the fact that his neck tears open into a gaping maw#idk if this will gain any interest or not to answer#but i'm just really intrigued by the idea of it
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Y’know I think all of Char’s divorces could be explained by him being aroallo and trying his best to be alloallo because he doesn’t realize he’s aroallo. But also I’m not sure the world is ready for rep like that
#because like. it’s an extension of his he tries to conform to people’s beliefs thoughts on who he should be#so at military school everyone thinks he and Garma should be a power couple. so he does his best to be that kind of boyfriend with Garma#and then the aristocracy thinks he should have an awkwardly younger bride that he marries for political power. so he seduces Haman#and then Reccoa thinks he should be a domineering presence in her life but at this point it’s been YEARS and he can’t keep up the act any#longer because he DOESN’T feel that way!#and nobody really expects him and Amuro to have a relationship so what they have both isn’t romantic and is more genuine than any other#relationship Char had! but he’s already burnt himself out so horribly trying to be who everybody wants him to be. so he goes and he makes#his own faction so that he’ll be able to have death by Amuro#but like. it’s too easy to read that as “oh aroallo people are evil and manipulative about their relationships’’ instead of “Char Aznable#is always trying to play the part someone else wrote for him and that causes massive tragedy when he reaches spots where he CAN’T play that#part because he doesn’t have those feelings and a lot of pain would’ve been solved if he hadn’t had to act like he did have them’’#this I say#mobile suit gundam#char aznable#meta#<- I guess?#oh damn I made a typo in that first tag. how he not his he
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Jay would not be opposed to murder i think he dreams about killing people and has to remind himself that thats not ok and normal actually
#jay tag#hes like yea id kill a bitch if it.#came down to it#and he would not be a hater or a voice of reason if someone else on the team#was like ‘id kill someone if necessary’#hed be like yea me too man kets do it#had to change remember to remind like idk man why this got corrected#i feel so st7pid and ugly (wrote a typo)
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Loki, the Prince
Loki Moodboard trilogy: 1 | 2 | 3
#loki#marvel#thor 1#thor 1 loki#I like to think he wrote a lot#u know?#have somewhere to put down his thoughs since no one else would listen#also hey yes I *am* making it a Thing of Mine to make diff moodboards for a character's diff stages thank you for asking#also taking pages out of friends books: feel shitty? make fixation stuff#moodboard#my moodboard#my moodboards#moodboards#I just realize my other tag said moodBOARS#skdhfkjshdkfhs#someone needs to make that a thing. moodboars#also yes I love giving people fancy titles why u ask
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if you as a fic reader ever become possessed by the urge to do a popularity bracket with the fics other people wrote and shared for fun and for free, consider:
don't ❤️
#just!!!! make a rec list!!!!!!!!!#popularity contests do nothing but drive writers out of fandoms by pitting people against their friends#and invariably result in people being assholes in the comments as if the people who wrote the fic can't see it#like ''oh clearly fic x is better than fic y''#or ''why is fic c even in this poll?''#nobody gains anything by you doing a bracket to see which fic is the ''most popular''#a stat which could be found more easily & less cruelly by simply hitting the sort by bookmarks/kudos button on ao3#anyway ugh. i saw that one of my fics was being pitted against one of my friend's fics in this bracket that's going around#and i have no idea who is ''winning'' because i refuse to look. but either way it's gonna feel bad!!!#because i want my friend to get his flowers so i want him to win!!! but i also would like to know that people like my fic!!!!#so it's just a lose/lose situation even though i generally don't give a shit about numbers#but this turns it into a schoolyard popularity thing#and the emotional response to having people *vote* on if your work is *better or worse* than other fic is hard to ignore#cannot reiterate enough JUST MAKE A REC LIST#or if you absolutely must do a bracket like this do it in a private chat server or something#don't create a public forum for people to pass value judgements where the authors can see it#and feel bad if they get told their fic is ''worse'' than someone elses#but also feel bad if they get told theirs is ''better'' because it came at the cost of telling another author they weren't good enough#ANYWAY i still feel sick with a super sore throat and a headache & am probably extra cranky because of it#(still testing negative thankfully so it's probably just weather/allergen related)#gonna go make some tea and prep the fic updates i want to post today#cass says things#fandom problems#wank adjacent
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i'm noticing that when people request things and i write it for them, sometimes the people i write for dont reblog or give me any feedback. ^^ its starting to get a bit irritating when i take the time to write something and i just get a like from the person. the twst fandom has been talking about this since forever but literally the least you can do is reblog. seriously.
#im thinking about not taking requests ever anymore honestly#like i have ideas floating around in my brain#why should i write something for someone else when they dont even appreciate it#i wanted to finish the 1.8k event but i dont even think i'll be able to do that#its a shame the twst community turned out this way#and even just writing in general gahhh#like i love writing but its becoming such a chore#anyways my mutuals can request stuff but im getting fed up#its also been hurting my feelings a bit.#i actually had this happen DURING the 1.8k event too#i wrote stuff for moots and couldnt wait to see their reactions and then they just liked#it felt like a slap in the face#idk man i just want to enjoy things again that would be nice#ikepri and ikevamp fandom here i come i hope ygys are more receptive!!#🐙! auburn's rambles <3
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this was one of the first snippets i posted back on patreon in 2021, with Lea and Merry. i've edited it a bit (a lot) before reposting it since it was a few years old, and it was fun to see how much more confident i am now with writing intimate scenes than i was back then.
i imagine this would take place sometime while the gang is in Highfell, maybe the first few nights or right before they're setting out to leave again. enjoy~
Lea glances back as Merry quietly steps out onto the balcony, a sudden wave of heat washing over them from inside before the door closes and the cold night air chases it back out. They shiver a bit, eyeing the bottle in Merry's hand as she walks over to where they sit balanced on the railing, their back towards the inn, their feet dangling over the long drop down to the beach below. They take a deep inhale from their pipe, tasting it for a long moment before exhaling slowly.
Merry leans against the railing beside them, her arms crossed over the cold, damp wood, clutching the bottle still in her hand, tapping it lightly with her nails.
"You going to stay out here all night?" Merry asks, peering up at Lea, who just shrugs. "You're wasting that expensive bed in there," Merry scoffs, turning out towards the water and taking a quick drink before setting the bottle aside precariously atop the railing.
"I can't sleep," Lea says simply, staring out at the dark water, fidgeting with their pipe in their hand.
"There are plenty of other things you can do in a bed like that than just sleep," Merry smirks.
Lea huffs, rolling their eyes as they raise their pipe to their lips again.
The waves roll gently out across the beach, the black water shimmering as the full moon reflects its light across the choppy surface, with a soft green glow on the distant horizon from the northern lights. Merry and Lea sit in comfortable silence for a few minutes, and Lea finds themself glancing sideways, staring at the woman beside them, the soft light of the inn filtering through the balcony windows and igniting her auburn hair in a dreamy glow, clashing with the dark shadows and white, pale light coming off the water.
"What?" Merry says, giving Lea a coy look out of the corner of her eye.
Lea scowls, shaking their head and turning away, lifting their pipe only for Merry to pluck it from their hand, tilting her head and leaning in close as she takes a deep breath, holding the pipe between her lips. Lea doesn't move away, even as Merry exhales, the smoke curling in the small space between them.
"Smoking is bad for you, you know," she says.
"So is drinking," Lea shoots back, and Merry just smiles, holding the pipe in her mouth, her lips curling around the mouthpiece as her teeth flash white in the dark.
Merry slides closer along the railing, her eye roaming over Lea's face, flicking to their lips, and she can’t suppress the thrill she feels when Lea doesn't move away, a sudden nervous energy pulsing in the air. Slowly, Lea reaches out, gently taking the pipe from Merry's mouth, and she lets them, holding their dark eyes in her gaze as they do it, her lips parting just enough for the mouthpiece to slide free. Lea is the one that looks away first, a slight blush creeping over their face, glancing down and fumbling with the pipe in their lap.
Merry is feeling bold, either from the alcohol or the tobacco or both, and she closes the remaining space between them, her hand gently brushing over Lea's thigh - but they go rigid at the contact, grabbing her by the wrist and pulling her hand away.
Merry quickly steps back, recoiling, and Lea releases her, their eyes widening.
"What are you doing?" Lea asks, their words coming out too fast, clumsily swinging their legs back over the railing and dropping down onto the balcony. They clutch their pipe to their chest, blinking slowly at the captain, their eyes still wide and wary.
"Sorry, I clearly misread the… situation," Merry says, raising her hands, giving Lea an apologetic look. "I thought you were interested."
Lea hesitates, glancing out at the water, before forcing themself to look back at Merry.
"I - I am," they say quickly, grimacing before dropping their hands and setting their pipe down beside Merry's bottle on the railing. They struggle for a moment, scowling at the pipe and wringing their hands, anxiously twisting a thumb ring that Merry has never noticed before.
"I'm sorry. I just… are you sure?" they finally say, and they can't look at her, their face burning, wishing the floor would just swallow them up. Lea just finds it hard to believe that a woman like the captain would be interested in them - after everything. Of course, there's been flirting and teasing between them, but Merry seems to be like that with just about everyone. And even Lea wasn't sure sometimes if they really meant it - but right now, just the two of them, it feels more real. More tangible.
"I'm sure, Lea."
Merry tilts her head at them, studying their face for a moment. Lea is handsome, and their features look even more severe than usual in the unforgiving moonlight, their eyes flashing as they return her stare. Lea takes a step forward then, but stops short, opening their hands, palms-up - waiting for her.
Merry approaches them as if they were a skittish animal - she doesn't want to spook them again. But Lea gives her a little nod, and soon enough they're so close that she can smell nothing but that tobacco on their breath.
Merry takes their hands, guides them to her waist.
"I'm sure," she says again. "I like you, Lea Chen," she whispers, and Lea bows their head, their jaw set. Merry raises a hand and gently presses her palm to Lea's cheek, and they let out a long sigh, melting into the touch, closing their eyes for a moment before turning their head - just enough to brush their lips against Merry's inner wrist, feel her warmth and taste her pulse.
The gesture seems to ignite them both simultaneously, Merry's other hand tangling in their thick hair, cradling the back of their neck and urging them forward while Lea roughly grabs at her hips pulls her close. Their bodies lock together as their lips meet, teeth clicking against each other and lips splitting painfully in their haste.
It's a messy first kiss, both of them hungry for it, enthusiastic, clumsy, and a little bloody - metallic with the sweet spice of tobacco and alcohol making Lea's head spin as they taste Merry's tongue in their mouth. Merry rolls her hips against their thigh, pulling at their hair and sucking on their bottom lip, ignoring the ache in her teeth as they kiss and kiss and kiss.
Eventually they have to break apart, both of them breathing hard, Merry still gripping a handful of Lea's hair, their bun hanging loose with long strands falling across their face and tickling Merry's lips as they pant together over the sound of the waves.
"The bed," Lea says, breathless, and Merry nods, pulling them back towards the door, and they reach around her for the doorknob, throwing it open hard enough that it slams into the wall and makes both of them wince. But Merry just laughs.
"Sorry," Lea says sheepishly, ducking their head as they gently push it close. It's scorching in the room, from the woodstove, or just from the two of them together, hot and heavy hands roaming and groping as the two kiss again, slowly backpedaling towards the bed.
Merry shrugs out of her jacket, letting it drop to the floor before reaching for Lea's belt buckle. She pulls at their shirt, untucking it from their trousers, and Lea watches as Merry pulls their belt free in one quick motion, tossing it over her shoulder with a smirk. Her hands are surprisingly cold now, slipping beneath their shirt, Lea grunting from the touch as she trails her fingers across their stomach.
"Okay?" Merry prompts, looking up to search Lea's face, and they nod quickly, leaning forward to pepper kisses along Merry's jaw, down her neck, all while her hands explore beneath their shirt, tracing the plane of muscle over their ribs before slowly drawing her nails down their back.
Merry tilts her head back, Lea's lips brushing against her pulse, sucking gently, teeth grazing over her flushed skin, their hands reaching around to slide down the curve of her ass, squeezing roughly until she gasps. Merry pushes their shirt up then, fumbling a bit as she tries to unbutton Lea's trousers, and they laugh, the sound reverberating through Merry's chest before they relent, pulling back so Merry can actually see what she's doing. The buttons are no match for her now, and she gives Lea a coy look through her lashes.
"Take off your shirt," Merry says, her fingers curling around the front of Lea's trousers, partly pulling them open, admiring the glimpse of their lower stomach as they raise their arms to tug at their shirt. They jerk it off over their head, tossing it aside with their belt, and Merry drinks in the sight of them, rolling her bottom lip between her teeth as she looks over their exposed torso, their chest and their scars, and all the beauty marks adorning their skin. She releases their trousers to run her hands over their chest, their shoulders, squeezing the swell of muscle in their arms before pulling them back in for more kisses, open-mouthed and still hungry. Lea makes a sound in the back of their throat that sends a spike of want lancing hot up Merry's spine, and she grinds herself against them, her hands tightening around their arms hard enough to bruise. She breaks their kiss then to desperately press her lips to the hollow of their throat, breathing them in and dragging her tongue across their collarbone before blowing cool air over their pulse and making them shiver.
Lea pushes Merry farther into the room, tangled together and nearly tripping over each other until the back of Merry's knees hit the bed.
She drops down, pulling Lea down with her, though they catch themself, a hand on either side of her, palms pressed to the bedspread. They lower themself slowly, sliding their thigh between her legs and flexing it a few times and dragging it up along the length of her until she’s squirming, her fingernails leaving little half-crescents indented in their shoulders.
Lea pushes her shirt up, exposing her stomach, caressing her with a gentle hand before sliding low to kiss her just above her navel. They follow the scattered trail of freckles, their tongue snaking out and leaving its own glistening trail as they slowly make their way down to the waistband of her trousers. Their hands follow close behind, teasing her breasts before sliding down her stomach to her thighs, pushing them apart and opening her legs wide as they take their place on their knees. They pause for a moment, kicking their own shoes off before pulling at Merry's, followed by her trousers, with Merry laughing and wiggling on the bed all the while.
The laughing stops, though, when Lea presses their mouth against her, her breath catching in her throat as they kiss slowly at her inner thighs, sucking on the soft skin and carefully testing her with their teeth. Merry reaches down, fingers twisting through Lea's hair, her body arching back against the bed as Lea drags their tongue over her cock, hot and wet and attentive.
But they stop, pulling back to kiss her some more, on her stomach, her hips, biting at her thighs, all while her hand tightens around their hair until she can't take it anymore. Her thighs clench around Lea's head, breathless and giddy, her long hair starting to stick to the sudden sweat along the back of her neck.
"Lea," she whines, and then she inhales sharply as they finally wrap a hand around her base and press a wet kiss to the tip of her cock, staring up at her as they do, their other hand gripping one of her thighs. They open their mouth, taking a little at a time, bobbing their head as Merry gasps and pulls at their hair. Lea eventually grabs her hips, pressing her back into the bed when she starts to buck reflexively, their movements slow and agonizing as they keep stopping and starting again, kissing her stomach and thighs, reaching up and teasing her nipples through her shirt.
When they wrap their lips around her again, they let her hit the back of their throat, Merry loudly moaning their name, both hands tangled desperately in their hair now as they move up and down a few times and then slowly draw back, their tongue flexing deliciously against her before they let her fall from their mouth with a gasp. Strands of spit and fluid drip from their open mouth, and Merry tugs impatiently at their hair, sitting up then to meet them with a kiss.
Lea holds her face in their hands, their thumb stroking her cheekbone, tentatively touching the fabric of her bandana, still wrapped around her head and hiding her eye from them.
Merry pulls back, Lea's hands still cradling her face, and she reaches up, touching their wrist before taking their hand in her own, guiding their fingers to slide beneath the cloth, giving them a nod when they hesitate, their brow furrowed with concern.
"Take it off," Merry says, though her voice is soft, not a command like earlier - but a request. She nods at Lea again, sliding her hand down their arm and giving it a squeeze. The first time with someone, Merry usually keeps the bandana on - she's protective of it. It's not like it's some big secret - anyone can see the scars beneath the bandana, the way she hides behind it. Maybe they can even tell that she's hiding more than just her damaged eye. But she wants Lea to see. She doesn't know why, but she wants them to see her tonight.
Lea carefully lifts the bandana off, untangling some of Merry's hair twisted through it, setting it atop the blankets. Merry casts her gaze sideways, avoiding Lea as they take in her fully exposed face, her drooping eyelid and her milky white eye. They don't say anything, instead just reaching up again and tracing the scars there, the ghost of a touch along her cheek.
Merry closes her eyes, bowing her head for a moment. When she opens them again, she can't quite meet Lea's stare, so she looks down at their chest, at their own scars, and she mirrors their touch, her thumb caressing the raised skin that runs horizontal just beneath the muscle. Lea takes her in their arms then, pulling her close, humming softly as she touches them there.
"Merry," they breathe, their lips against her neck, and for a moment she just lets them hold her, kissing her throat and cradling her face while she strokes their chest.
Eventually, she slowly pulls back, slipping out of their arms and pressing her hands to their chest, pushing them back onto the mattress, her long hair falling over her shoulders and tickling their face. Sitting between their legs, she touches them with her hands first, caressing their face, the curve of their neck, then feeling the strong muscle of their shoulders, down to the swell of their chest and those long scars. The muscle over their ribs, the soft skin of their stomach, their hips, squeezing their thighs. She stands from the bed and takes off their trousers, dropping back down and starting again, her hands first, slow and deliberate, and then she follows with her mouth, kissing their jaw, the hollow of their throat, trailing along their collarbone before sucking on their chest, massaging and kissing along their scars, drawing a low moan from them before taking one of their nipples in her mouth and teasing them with her teeth. She sucks gently while Lea strokes her hair, pushing it back out of her face, gathering it in one hand and pulling it over her shoulder while their breath quickens with pleasure.
Merry kisses their scars a few more times before sitting back up, licking her lips and running her hands down their stomach and over their thighs again. She slowly draws her hand between their legs, and Lea's hips twitch, longing for her touch, pressing themself against her while they watch her through half-lidded eyes. She pulls back, getting an indignant huff from Lea, licking her fingers before she reaches down to touch them again. She drags her thumb over their growth, moving her hand in a slow circle, Lea's head rolling back against the pillows as she does.
"Fuck," they grunt, gritting their teeth and grabbing at the blankets. Merry stares down at them, pressing a palm to their lower stomach as she strokes their opening, playing with their growth until she's satisfied by their panting and moaning. Lea tries to stay quiet - it embarrasses them, it makes them feel too vulnerable, even more than someone touching them like this - but she doesn't let them. Lea bites their lip, swallowing loudly, sweating and twisting in the sheets until they can't resist it anymore. Her hand works faster and harder, until they finally moan her name, and then she slips a few fingers inside.
Merry pays attention to the spots that make them moan even louder, their body trembling from her touch, her fingers curling slowly inside with delightfully obscene sounds as she thrusts her hand faster and faster, hot and wet. By the time Merry moves her hand away and eases herself inside of them, they're both begging for it, Lea's legs shaking as they lift their hips to accommodate her.
They finish quickly together like that. Skin on skin, grunting together as Lea hooks their legs around her and touches her stomach, lifting her shirt up to grab at her breasts, holding her tight until she has to pull out to come on their stomach. It takes her a moment to recover, Lea pushing her hair back out of her face again, and then she returns her attention to them, working her hand against their growth just like before until they finally come undone completely beneath her. She strokes them gently a few more times before she untangles herself from their legs, standing from the bed and fetching a towel from the washbasin in the corner. She cleans them up, and then collapses on top of them, both of them hot and sweaty and clinging to each other. Lea takes a deep breath, wrapping their arms around her and holding her tightly against their chest.
"Hmm," Merry presses her lips to their flushed skin, giving them a few lazy kisses before tucking her head beneath their chin. "I told you I liked you, Lea Chen."
Lea smiles softly, reaching up to pet her hair, kissing the top of her head and feeling a sudden rush of affection that nearly makes their breath catch in their throat. They gently comb their fingers through her hair, neither of them quite knowing what else to say - until Merry is eventually lulled to sleep by Lea's gentle hands.
They take the chance to study the scars on her face, the slow rise and fall of her breathing, the way her body curls around them with her hands grasping at the blankets, grasping for them, even in her sleep. They notice a few grey hairs this close, and then they start to count her freckles when sleep alludes them.
Eventually they relax, leaning back into the pillows and staring up at the ceiling. They keep brushing their fingers through Merry's hair as they wonder how long it will be until they regret this. Only a few more days left here - only a few more days with her. It will be a clean break, at least.
They glance down at her again, clenching their jaw before turning their head to stare out the windows to the balcony, watching the distant northern lights dance across the water. At least right now, in this moment, they have this. Merry's steady heartbeat pressed against their own, the calming sound of the ocean outside, the heat of the woodstove making their eyes grow heavy - they feel warm and content as they finally pass into sleep, even when Merry slips out of their arms, and out the door.
#also i just realized highfell isnt on the water but theyre sitting by the ocean. oopsie#anyways. this was like the first sex scene i ever wrote LOL#it was very funny rereading it. i also avoided all 'bad' words back then#which i still tend to avoid using too many of them bc i do find them to be silly and a lot of them are like. ough#but you have to call it SOMETHING. you know#i honestly go back and forth about liking how i write these bc they do feel very.... hmm visceral isnt quite the right word#but i know they're not Fluffy or anything i tend to get straight to business lmfao#and then i'll read someone else's work who writes like the softest most beautiful sex scene ever. and im like :/ why does mine#read like a horror movie. LOL#snippets#lea chen#merry harlowe#nsft
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I was always told
never stare directly at the sun
for it will damage your eyes.
Even just for a moment
our sun is too bright
except for when
in the most total of eclipses
we can only look at our sun
when she is almost not here at all
only with Luna to shield us from her
can we see our own sun
How tragic that must be
to know we cant look at her
without harming ourselves.
my sun is different, though
my sun is warm, inviting
it doesn't hurt to look at my sun
my sun is brilliant,
his brilliance lights up everything
showering the world with light
careful to not overwhelm
careful not to burn
careful not to harm
my sun is the most dazzling star
in the entire universe
nothing could ever outshine him
no moon, or other star
could ever hope to match my sun
#poetry#titled My Sun#lit#writing#words#literature#virgils words#virgil writes#i wrote this about a friend#but after reading it again#it feels like its for someone else#strange#life is strange#writeblr#fragments#writing blog#poetry blog#creative writing#splattered-ink
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unsure how to word this but there is something about having ocs with unsavory events happening in their past where it's like. talking about it, even when asked, seems almost gratuitous and inappropriate. and i'd much rather describe it through the oc themself and/or draw Them saying it. which is like. fitting for the subject matter? like of course its weird to talk about somebody else's business...!
and falls back into humanizing em/exploratory writing and development where u consider the impact of words said/words unsaid/HOW those words are said etc etc
#because not all real persons would give u every detail of their trauma obviously#which makes sense but im an overexplainer but also it feels inappropriate to overexplain when it comes to dis#i hope that makes sense#talkys#i once described what went down with al as just directly as possible and it still felt weird. ykwim?? idk why.#well i do know why! i dont want it to seem gratuitous or like That Cheap Writing Element. fine line#same with talon so he'll just keep implying it thru text + dialogue which is how it should be !#the only difference is i think with al i wrote it like he would've said it bc he has more access to that side of himself#and is aware of how it affected him#whereas characterwise talon absolutely would just speak in riddles about and around it#i don't even think he's conscious about the direct effects of it#(but i wouldnt know bc he hasn't made that known to me in my brain)#people respond differently to different things and all that#also im so sorry if half the shit ive said recently is so like. Well Duh. i havent made a new oc in a decade gimme a break LOL#also i realize the. irony? of me even vaguely talking about it in the way i did but 1. i think that's also realistic when you#dont want to do a whole deep dive on someone else's business and 2. people are becoming#curious about my oc(s) and im just thinking about well; significant events and how to handle not speaking about em#FOR them. <- weirdly#idk. they're real to me.#its just so much more interesting to leave it up to them! people can lie people can downplay
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