#i dont personally use it but some of my (nd) friends do. and it doesnt rlly bother me

[ghostdnfie]

.

[cconfusedkat]

Wips r slowly building up again even when i thought deleting all of them would spare me T___T ik i just need to finish my follower oc refs and a couple gifts but i also wanted to share these ,,

I like to combine my special interests together nd so i ended up with lamb and the ichor machine [au] which i actually might put some effort into and have actual refs for even if i dont plan to ever draw it again lmao-

The main difference is that lamb and goat are used as scapegoats for catholic cartoons for children around the 1930's, and its all an actual disguise for the Ichor "Demon" cult. Nari is the ichor demon in question (when rlly hes just a cat with sharp ears lol-)

Cultists fail their ritual to summon the ichor demon. Mystic selling studios shuts down ominously. Shamura (who was born from the ink and doesnt know theyre not a real person, just artifical. Cycle moment) heads back to the studio because mystic supposedly wrote them a letter to come back for Something.

Little did they know itd lead them down a rabbit hole of seeing a supposed little lamb twist into the same ichor demon narinder and making an attempt to escape from the studio, only coming to realize it was all just apart of the cycle and they're doomed to forever repeat it for the sins of abandoning the studio in the first place (which again they didnt actually do but ykwim)

Basically the ink demon and bendy are two separate entities, so instead of having narinder be bendy, its lamb as bendy and narinder as the ichor demon briefly. Lamb is more occurent in the dark revival , and then thats when they twist into the ichor demon in front of heket, revealing that in fact lamb and nari share a body of ichor

Umm yahh thats what ill share plot wise fur now , designs r already subject to change (lamb and goat) but yayayayayayayayaya! Autism!

Most of these ideas wouldnt exist without my friend helping me out when i randomly shared to them my ideas (jyoung( so as i add onto this au i want to emphasize more credit to her-

Ok more au posting eventually i need to stop procrastinating and finish up my undertakers/follower refs and art gifts for ppl KSJSJKSJD

[littlemissprettyprincess]

This is for everyone who seems to be "struggling" with states + what I can suggest + My success story.

-Have you ever been one of those people to reach "that moment" in manifestation where you wanted to be, even if you have never either it doesn't matter. You know how much of an outsider and annoyed/obsessive over loa when seeing other people succeed and couldnt really find what would work for me. Sounds like you, huh? You are not the only one, I'll tell you exactly how to get out of there + master your manifesting skills and a bit of self-concept.

The. answer. is. staring. right. at your face.............................................Yes.

"But anon, wdym by that??" What I mean is that notice how all of these people who post their success stories are in the state of easy/effortless manifestation. Like they mention how easy it is and how effective it is. Thats because of their state, they chose to occupy the state of someone who does the bare minimum in loa and still gets wtf they want. It doesnt matter how many times you repeat your affs, persist, mental diet, you wanna know why you waste energy doing that? Is because your occupying the state of "difficult manifesting", meaning you obsess over it, you try so hard but "nothing" comes, you feel you need to do the most to get it. Notice how all of these points I made fall under the state of "difficult manifestation"?? if you were in that state, those things I just mentioned would've been what you experience. Why?? BECAUSE YOU OCCUPIED THE STATE OF SOMEONE WHO ISNT SUCCESSFUL IN MANFESTING!!!

A thing I def reccomend when using states to manifest is to understand the 4D IS THE TRUE REALITY AND NOT THE 3D. Yes I know you're tired of hearing the same thing but now that you have a shifted paradigm on states, it should be easier. What I did was know that the 4d is the blueprint, kind of put it on the pedestal but not in the negative way. It was a way where I didn't ignore the 3d and affirm against it, but focused on my 4d and stuck with it. Because "ignoring the 3d and affirming agains it" simply implies that your 3d is filled with undesirable things and you affirm against it.

Cause trust me I've been there when I say living in my 4d was making me crazy, but you know why it did? Was because I looked at the 3d for validation/ didnt trust what my 4d is saying. It's kind of like y'know when you like a guy/girl and your friend warns you to stay away from that person but you get annoyed at them because you think what they're saying is bullshit?? Same thing applies. If you dont trust your 4d and realise it creates the 3d and is so much more powerful than what you experience, when will living in the end ever be a fullfilling thing to do? Get it? "Fullfilled" LMFAOO I'm so hilarious, but enough of my corny jokes. Heres a summary

-Be in the state of someone who is a master at manifesting/self concept etc.

-Know that your 4d creates everything, when its done in your 4d, its done in 3d, a simple way to put this is just live in your mind because when you realise that, you change your imagination, you change your reality and there is so much power in knowing that.

-ANNDDD THENNN you can apply everything else like persisting, repeating affs etc.

I got perfect self-concept doing this, like I got compliments today and I felt so confident, I love the way I'm so pretty, like why am I so perfect and gorgeous?

I manifested many straight niggas to like me at my school (im black and gay) let me tell you!!! a nigga stopped and walked back and stared at me to see "Damn who is that??" I was laughing so hard.

Overall my life has improved, I get things to go my way and yeah. thats about my successes. I might start a blog but because of how disrespectful anons are Idk if I should.

-tysm lovies, stay hot nd mysterious, and know how powerful you are!!!! stop wavering!!!!!

omg, thank you so much for sharing this ! i hope this helps some people ! ♡

[query-quadrant]

Wh⛤t should I we⛤r for my first p⛤le ⛤nnivers⛤ry?

It’s mine ⛤nd my moir⛤ils first p⛤le ⛤nnivers⛤ry this sweep. Obviously I’d LOVE to spoil them rotten, so I got us tickets to ⛤ highly renowned st⛤ge perform⛤nce, ⛤nd ⛤ reserv⛤tion ⛤t ⛤ rest⛤ur⛤nt ⛤fterw⛤rd. ⛤s you c⛤n obviously tell, I know wh⛤t I’m doing, ⛤nd h⛤ve ⛤ll of th⛤t covered. 

The only problem is th⛤t I h⛤ven’t the f⛤intest ide⛤ of wh⛤t to we⛤r. 

I’m ⛤n extremely high cl⛤ss violetblood, ⛤nd I refuse to we⛤r ⛤nything th⛤t isn’t floor-length, but my moir⛤il often comments th⛤t this m⛤kes me ⛤ppe⛤r more cold th⛤n I re⛤lly ⛤m. Unfortun⛤tely most of the ⛤dvice I h⛤ve seen online m⛤inly involves we⛤ring g⛤rish p⛤tterns or intention⛤lly messy clothing. 

Do you h⛤ve ⛤ny ide⛤ how I might m⛤ke myself ⛤ppe⛤r more “w⛤rm” or “⛤ppro⛤ch⛤ble” without h⛤ving to dumb down my f⛤shion sense to the likes of mini⛤ture-putters? 

oh finally something i can talk about yeah ok buckle in this shits gonna be long as hell im not even gonna bother with my gimmick here i just wanna talk about clothes for a second

most trolls are dumb as shit and dont give a fuck about fashion and its not even just everyday clothes i mean youve probably seen the shit some trolls wear to dates vitriol emoji

but if youre looking for actually good inspo i have a friend who put out some shit in eclectoskeleton but also theres been some surprisingly good shit in deadliest designs monthly recently

if youre looking for advice from me specifically though then heres a couple things to think about if you wanna wear fancy pale clothes

i dont normally wear this stuff but i do at least have a working thinkpan and know way more than most idiots plus i have super real degrees in quadrantology so some of its probably good advice

colors: obviously going lighter and softer is classic its called pale feelings the pale quadrant and the holidays pale moon night so why not pale colors obviously duh

most trolls stick to blacks and grays and darker shit at least as the base of their outfits most of the time because theyre boring pieces of garbage and also cause its practical i guess

so bringing out those pale pinks or just lighter violets or whites feels special and its something you can do to soften shit up

its pretty it stands out in a crowd and it sets a mood it says i give a fuck about you and i want people to know

but you dont have to stick with that ive seen trolls get a lot of mileage out of shit like wearing a little of each others colors or you can even try their favorite colors for cute personal shit

design:

obviously you already know about shit like diamond motifs but theres ways to do that without just throwing on an ugly little argyle sweater

diamond shapes in embroidery or beading or in lace can look really fucking cute if you do it right

if you can work in moons and stars thats something pretty and obviously pale but not that stupid looking and btw dont be afraid to throw in a little bit of sparkle too

you said you have to wear floor length shit but thats not a deal breaker i mean shit big clothes are classic for paledates and even though youre not gonna be wearing actual palewear you can take those sorts of ideas and fold them into your shit by going for something flowy

i mean yeah bigass sweaters and scarves are classic but so are things like capes maybe its not always "approachable" but it can still say "i pity you or at least probably give a shit about you"

accessories:

anyway speaking of classically pale shit obviously look into pearls the pink ones even kinda look like little pink moons you get it you know what i mean

diamond shaped jewelry is classic but also cabochon cuts are also good to look into especially if you can get your fronds on any pink or white rocks or anything with a little chatoyancy

other shit i forgot to mention or general shit:  if you want you can do matching shit

it doesnt need to be one of those matching half and half diamond necklaces for wigglers or anything just making sure theyre wearing something with the same metal and decorative rock as you are or at least some of the same colors so you look good together is good enough  i got a little into this by talking about stuff like sparkles and moons and all that but just think about pale nicknames when youre thinking about what to wear "moonlight" "starlight" "moonrise" "moonbeam" "stars" "twilight"

all those things are real and actually pretty things that you can take a lot of inspiration from

even shit like "sugar" or just fucking "diamond" or any of the millions of flowers and random pink or white or sparkly things people use

[hibiscussoupbowl]

Some characters in teen wolf are very 50 50 for me and some of those characters are malia, kira, allison, and derek. Most of them are females and that is bc the writers put all of their best into lydia.

Kira is one of the main characters that i dont like and that is bc how she was introduced was very weird. Eavesdropping on a convo and then just being like 'yeah those dreams mean ur gonna die :D' like sorry bro that is NOT the way to go if ur trying to make friends. I think the ppl who screwed her over the most was the writers bc i feel like if she was just a character on her own she wouldve been fine but it felt like she was there purely for scott. I get it, tv shows need romance most of the time but scott is never single ever. Like maybe s3a?? And even then its still sorta allison. Kiras scenes with malia were so good and i thought when they were dancing in the first ep of s4 i was like i think this would be a good dynamic. And in s5 when she has to capture the electricity or whatevrr malias there and shes giving her encouragement and i thought that was awesome. I feel like bc they made her there just bc of scott it made me iffy abt her character. Shes a kitsune who has lightning powers u couldnt give her some scenes were she wasnt with scott or doing stuff by herself??

Allison is another case like this. She has such good moments when its just her archery and doing stuff by herself or with lydia. S3a shes being herself and shes finding stuff out and still having to deal with ppl sorta dustrusting her bc she was an antagonist at the end of s2 and i think its annoying that they put isaac there as a love interest. Isaac and allison as separate characters or a dynamic?? Amazing. Awesome. But making them so sexual tension wasnt fun bc a. Allison was mainly using isaac as a rebound and b. when she was dying she was just all like scott its been you all along and that fine first love but to isaac??? That shit is painful af like imagine ur being kinda with a girl and then u think ok finally someone loves me finally someone is in the same boat of ppl being distrusting but then she dies and not even a glance? Idk just felt bad. Allison was so close bc when she was on her own she had such good scenes and i wish she had more archery scenes and ones with lydia. It was also like the parallel u couldve gotten with isaac and allison fighting together or smt???? Like with the end of s2 with allison shooting down all of the wherewolves and then s3b and shes fighting WITH them???? Like bro wasted potential.

Malia is just a character a 50 50 chaarcter cuz there is some questionable things she does but shes pretty cool with the whole 8 years coyote thing and with being blunt but idk i think i just am 50 50 on her lol

Lydia is the absolute best bc omfg she had some dating but overall she mostly figured stuff out herself and she had good sideplots with being a banshee and i thought her ajd parrish havibg that weird... smt was not needed but i did like the aspect of before she found out abt her sonar scream she needed to learn how to fight and i think it woldve been cool if they were not freaking tension filled. She was a strong character and they def put everything into her bc holy crap. Idk to me shes a big 10/10 character.

Derek is just freaking annoying man. Like sleeping with the enemy so many times? And he also never has smt besides a family problem or smt abt the person hes sleeping with. I was also kinda annoyed abt how isaac leaving after derek throws the glass never gets resolved. I feel like he also doesnt grow as a character much. Like two seasons hes like my sister died my uncle did it and family fire and my ex is the one who caused most of this and then s3 and its i slept with the enemy and my sisters back somehow after the family fire that my other ex caused and then s4 is braedens season and she was again so cool as a character on her OWN nd then the inly interesting thing was that he needed to learn how to use a gun. And then s5 he was barely there and s6 he was barely there so he didnt have growth i feel like. Not to say he wasnt hella funny at times

They all had good moments though like malias plot abt her mother was interesting (even if i couldnt really follow along) and kiras whole skinwalker thing which i was disapointed abt bc i wanted her to stay for s6.

They also make ALL the female characters be romantic with scott of least ONCE. Lydia kissed him, allison, kira, malia (which i thought was weird that they just, got rid of that in the movie and developed it in like 20 episodes and was rushed as hell) and then allison again. Please give me a character that isnt somehow drawn to scott i beg

[dearhaos]

storytime?!

the weekend morning class was like full of actual 40-smth adults n all nd then there was like 5 of us in the younger range i was in my first year of hs i think one of the girls was also in hs then one girl was a bit older than us ? i think ? n there were two guys majoring in compsci at uni we got closer bc we were the youngest ones so we wld all sit together nd do the talking exercises together n at some point we started hanging out like we went to ramen once n we went on this long ass walk all together one day too . we kinda quickly fell out tho bc most of them werent coming to class every saturday sometimes missed multiple classes in a row n all so it was mostly just me n this one guy nd it didnt seem all that weird at the time bc we were friends <3 but whenever i look back on it im like well um it was kinda odd tho

we were p touchy? like even in class? we wld lean on each other n stuff but like that doesnt Have to be weird However

we were all waiting at our bus stop after class one day in winter and i dont quite remember how this actually happened but he jokingly put his hands under my coat (on my back) to warm them up? it was rlly weird bc he didnt even do it from like a hugging position like from the sides but like . got them under there from the bottom up idk . like i was like haha silly at the time but ?

then our language school was holding like a fair or smth one afternoon where every language wld have a little booth w food from that culture n whatever so this guy n i decided to go to the faire thing together but like at some point that evening i once again dont even remember ?? how this came to be ?? but we were hugging behind this building ?? like there was nobody around there idk why we were outside idk why we were Behind the building ?? but ok

then i remember messaging w him a lot also but there was one time in particular where i said smth nice n he was all like . acting like im literally the only person acting nice to him ever like idk how to describe it n i dont have a quote but it was very . what would i do without you i wld have nothing to live for if u didnt reassure me . yknow

[apothecarywormcrud]

apples and coconuts? :D

apples ✦ how long have you been self-shipping, in general? when did you find out about the self-ship community?

i've been in this shit since middle school so like. 16 years? god that is a long time to be mackin on anime dudes. i've been doing it on tumblr for like. idk 4-5? i was introduced to the community via a friend and now you're all stuck in here with me. woe.

coconuts ✦ what's your "type" in terms of fictional characters? what character trait(s) are you most drawn to?

OHOHOHO this is a fun one bc only recently did i realize another consistent throughline in a lot of my favs which is, Guys Who Are Weapons, which includes:

kunikida aka mr paladin supreme nd all paladins suffer from this to some extent. if u are willing to use urself as a human shield nd die to protect th people around u its already too late im afraid.

kabuto who witnessed The Horrors nd decided to make himself into a useful tool so he'd never be discarded again

hazama was straight-up built to serve as a body and weapon to someone else and only became his own person via a fluke. this is more of an inversion but he can be in the club anyways.

viktor's shit is less Weapon but still very much like. become a living embodiment of ur ideals so you dont have to worry so much about the pain of being human. kinda thing.

law went from i wanna kill everyone now to i wanna kill this one specific guy and at no point does his own well-being actually enter into it bc if you are a sword then it doesnt matter what else happens to you as long as you successfully cut down the thing you are aiming at. i think abt this often when i feel like experiencing emotional distress.

but generally i like it when a guy* is a doctor and/or mad scientist and also a smug shithead or just otherwise kind of a weirdo. bonus point if they are sufferring from The Agonies.

[dojae-huh]

I want to share the thought I researched on haechan..he is a successful idol for his age nd he is good at singing and great at dancing...even their choreo master praised him as he is the first one to learn the dance fast nd his movement are very neat..he even included haechan in his team if he ever to make a 5 member team..ye ofcrs when 127 performs he does stand out to me..especially when his sexy moves dominates the stage..but what amazes me is that he doesnt attracts me when he is alone...dont take it badly..(I really hate to admit it as his fan tho) ..but the stage presence I got even from doyoung (he is way behind in dancing if we compare with haechan that's why I took him as an example) I dint get it from haechan...he nor dominate the stage nor give the spark.as his fan it really makes me wonder..how is to build up the stage presence....what I am saying is some ppl get the vibe only from standing in the centre..becoz of their aura..is it naturally getting or to make...I dont knw...he can entertain,be funny ,make contents everything.. .he is really good...but he stand out only when he is doing smthng with his grp..for me....just my opinion...nd that's really sad...

That's an interesting topic you came with. Thank you.

First of all, I think different people understand stage presence differently. Some pay more attention to the aura, others to facial expressions, yet another to movements and execution of a choreo.

Hwanwung from Oneus is an interesting case. Some really like his dancing and praise him for his stage presence, make an example of him, I like him as a person and a vocalist but find him very over the top, trying too hard to be liked, to show off, to be worthy of being called the main dancer (similar to Jungwoo). He is frankly on the cringy side.

Very few people in NCT have stage presence (enough to stand alone on the stage, of course almost all of them are much more expressive and experienced than average idols). I think in part because there are so many introverts in the group, in part because they didn't need to master it being a part of a group. Like take Taeyong, he is a timid guy, he even skipped school because he didn't have friends in high school, didn't blend in. He is still awkward. However, he was first made to evolve into a prospective trainee (learn dancing and rapping) and later pushed into the leader position. Taeyong had to learn how to be the liason between the management and the group, how to be a spokeperson, how to be a hyung to all the younger neos (he really liked being in Super M because, for a change, he was taken care of by 3 older artists he looked up to).

Haechan wants to be a singer-songwriter, maybe he will choose an image that doesn't need a lot of dancing. Or maybe he will work on it. Plus, solo artists perform with a group of backdancers.

As for the aura. Haechan slouches and he doesn't work with his face. Some idols can get away with it if their faces look fierce with make up (like Jae) or very pretty, Haechan's resting face is a bit sour.

Haechan is a show stealer in the group in my eyes, but thanks to his movements.

We, people, are hierarchial animals. We look up to those who are higher than us, they are important. The verbal language evolved late. We still rely a lot on non-verbal signals. The gaze, the posture, the attitude, the way others react to the person in question (their approval, popularity points), the marking of the rank (a crown, bodyguard, expensive clothes), the confidence. All of it makes "the aura".

Doyoung knows it, he works on it. Everyone noticed his upgrade with acting facial expressions after the musical. He worked for DJJ, mastered poses and gestures for the choreos. I guess Haechan is focused more on the dancing (everyone knows he watches his fancams all the time). It is hard to notice something about yourself as you are biased or too focused on certain details.

You can say Doyoung has had the experience which Haechan lacks. He was a vocalist of a school band, he was MC of many big shows, he had duets and solos in big arenas, he acted in tv-series and a musical outside of the circle of his bandmates. Doyoung also doesn't believe in his looks or dancing, he feels the need to compensate with something to be liked, to stand out.

So let's not give up on Haechan just yet. I believe he just needs to be left to stand alone on the stage to learn how to dominate without the help of a group.

Taeyong, Taemin - both switch off their childish personal self and "become possessed" on the stage. Donghyuk is still with Haechan on the stage.

[ackee-fried-mofongo]

someone in these comments (@mocrlbmutwwwptth specifically) stated that “high functioning is a term used to describe how easy it is for nt people do deal with you ndness, NOT how easy it is to deal with your life” and UGGGHHHH YESSSS let me now ramble

(by opening the more tab you will be hit with 7 short-ish paragraphs about psychology being ass)

i have a lot of narcissistic tendencies, when i figured that out it was very depressing and made me deeply insecure basically overnight. for me, i am a very performative person who loves attention but i have a hard time processing affection, low empathy (quotient ≈ 20, if not all neurodivergence questionarres arent complete bullshit), a very shallow relationships with a large amount of people, and i fantasize a lot about people liking me and being the best at things. i am also functionally— and actually— aromantic, mostly because i never been interested in being so strongly connected to someone for a long time.

most literature and media of narcissicistic people portrays us as naturally evil and unfixable people. google, youtube, social media, and many reputable psychology/psychiatric resources are filled with images and articles about how to identify, deal with, escape from, get rid of, and disarm narcissists. even the media which is for narcissicists, who are just trying to healthily confront their bad habits, offer long prefaces framing them as people who’ve done irreparable damage to society and others around them. that media can be so scarring for people who just want help developing empathy, cause theyre bad at consoling a sad friend or they want help being less lonely.

the funniest part is, considering how dangerous the dsm considers these people to be, you’d think they would have promoted access to genuine strategies for combatting their problems suited to those with personality disorder/neurodivergent behaviors they wish to change right? at least so nt people could be comfortable more comfortable? HELL NO! its always just therapy. which… dont get me started.

therapy can be great. but with regards to psychology its literally like jail, conceptually and scientifically. reading “therapy” as a treatment for personality disorders in the dsm has the same connotation of reading “jailtime” as a punishment for a crime in federal law. the word, let alone the process, is a filler “solution” in psychiatry for all the niche, rare, misunderstood or hated mental disorders. looking for self improvement as a narcissistic person looking to be *less* narcissistic made me realize that some disorders go understudied (and thereby managed by therapy) for a variety of reasons. in my case, nobody trusts a narcissicist to seek help, so theres no reason to care… unless someone gets paid. did i mention therapy can cost money and be hard to access? oh yeah.

all of this is because psychology doesnt really even “study” neurodivergence/personality disorders compared to neurotypicality. it largely studies the reaction of neurotypical people to neurodivergent people, to the point where sometimes it can almost just be shitty sociology. if nt people hate flashy or attention-seeking people, think an nd person acts childish, or simply does not care about the intricacies of a persons behavior, it reflects in their research. they will list symptoms, the effects behaviors might have on life and environment, and the treatments they suggest FAR more often than any research about how that person feels, how their behavior affects their lives in accordance to how they want to live, or make any suggestion for specific improvement strategies with even hypothetical accuracy. its sad because, in theory, it should be a psychologists job.

quick queer/political intersectionality addition: you know how trans rights gained support and recognition largely as a medical topic, all the way until its designation as a mental disorder was weaponized against the movement, damaging the communitys abilty to focus on seeking serious progress for the medical wellbeing of trans ppl? doesnt that look a little bit like the nt study dynamic, where in this case nt cultural responses can completely halt or hijack a field of study because they want to?

ableism like this spills into the mainstream in all the worst ways. sure, understanding someone should be like making a friend. you wouldnt compare them to someone you like and show them how you did it. youd ask and empathize. i hope that more psychologists start asking and empathizing with their studies.

——————

nowadays im learning, at the very least, how to connect and empathize with people better, treating them as they want to be treated and considering them with the same depth and effort as i wish to be thought of. based on how my friends and family speak of me, narcissicists are 10x as caring and empathetic as psychology and psychiatry have been to us. if i/we arent, then at the very least we are capable, and prejudiced scientific neglect is part of why we are still like this. maybe ive inserted myself into this characterization of narcissicsts too much, but i really doubt if the intricacies of narcissism were publicized better, that many would refuse the opportunity to grow from it.

<3

tip: if you want REALLY want advice on improvement with regards to a nd/pd trait, you can usually get better results by searching up the qualities needed for the trait itself. always exclude the condition its associated with, never bring up treatment. thats helped me come across less weird shit and dead ends with therapy. (example: how to be less self centered npd —> humble traits/qualities/habits)

fuck it. shout out to "high functioning" neurodivergents

the ones who can mask easily, the ones who can get social cues, the ones who have managed to go most of their life not even knowing they were ND because they didn't present as the stereotypical ND person.

the ones who can pay attention in class, understand social etiquette, who understand societial expectations

the ones who don't feel neurodivergent enough bc they don't struggle in the same ways/areas a lot of NDs do, or they can't relate to other NDs' experiences because they always understood these things easily

the ones with high empathy, the ones who DO get the joke, the ones who are constantly told that they can't possibly be neurodivergent because they don't act like what you'd expect a neurodivergent person to act like.

you are neurodivergent enough. you are valid, and so are your experiences. not struggling as much as others do in some places doesn't mean you dont struggle at all. your condition and diagnosis is valid. your symptoms are valid. YOU ARE VALID. not checking all the supposed boxes doesn't mean you aren't neurodivergent. you are enough. you are valid. you are loved. you are valued. you matter. you belong in neurodivergent spaces, you deserve to use whatever resources are available to you, you are allowed to take up space in these communities. and i am so, so proud of you.

feel free to, and actually, i encourage you to reblog this with your experiences. we belong in this community as much as anyone else. please also tag this w/ any neurodivergent conditions i may have forgotten 💙

since this is getting lots of notes I'd like to add, even if you're undiagnosed or maybe self diagnosed, for whatever reason, (i.e. can't get access to a diagnosis, not being taken seriously, or just not wanting an official diagnosis, etc.) this still applies to you. actually especially to you folks. don't think for a second you're not valid just bc you don't have the paperwork or whatever to say it

[b1mbodoll]

gabi oh my god im so sorry about these rude anons 🥺 ur literally the sweetest and most precious person on this app and for people to call you "childish" and "weird" is crazy knowing how much you care about your anons and for some of them to take advantage of talking shit on anon is crazy.

they're points are trash, they dont have one valid reason to hate on you. they're just miserable and they shouldnt be on your profile in the first place if all they're going to do is spread negativity!!! all you do is spread positivity on your account. you literally are one of the most appreciative, kind, and heartwarming people on this app. you create a safe place for everyone who follows you and others too!!!

im so glad we're mooties n im so sorry that people are being so bitter to you baby :( you are literally so nice and not to mention such a good writer?? you make everything so detailed n interesting, you're amazing at what you do. if they dont like what you write, they literally dont have to read it..? its not that hard to not be a fucking bitch, honestly. some people are just cunts n need to realize the whole world doesnt revolve around them n they're big ass head </3

you dont deserve the hate you're receiving and i hope people will realize that just because they're miserable doesnt mean they need to be such bitch and talk shit on anon. like are you that much of a pussy you cant even send a message off anon on an APP? a PHONE. they act as if you can jump through the screen and attack them or some shit like people as such pussies its so funny to me 😭

you're literally just a silly little girl gabi, im so sorry. i promise you can always talk to me if you want or need to!! yk my dms are always open my love, take care :( <3

— lei 🫐 (sorry for the long msg bb!!)

lei my baby <3 i held onto this for a lil bc im so overwhelmed by how sweet you are :( my little ray of sunshine <3 i wish i could explain how much u and ur kind words mean to me :( but pls know i will forever hold this and every other message u have sent me, near and dear to my heart!!!!

ur so right !!!! i find it so dumb that people come onto my blog to spread negativity and hateful messages 😠 like how awful do you have to be to go around bothering people with a reason >:(

thank you so so so much for all the sweet compliments T_T im so emotional ur srsly too lovely <3 and i’m extremely happy you ‘nd others view my blog as a safe place !!! i always want people to feel welcome and cared for so i do my best to offer that ♡

i’m also glad we are not only mutuals but friends as well! we havent spoken for long but u already mean so much to me n i hope we are friends for a long time, baby <3 n thank u for the compliments abt my writing T_T its hard not to doubt myself and my writing but it gets a lil easier to stop when sweeties like u send such heartwarming messages like this 💌💌 mwah

it really isnt hard to be nice!!!!! or jusy block someone you dont like!!! i dont understand why its hard for them to get that through their thick skulls -_-

the use of anon when sending hate rllllly gets under my skin -_- like why are you afraid to own up to your mean and awful messages!!!!! why are you afraid to show me ur blog??? bc i can finally blog you if you do??? agh i will nvr understand meanies -_-

i am just a silly lil girl ur so right, my baby!!!!! i will keep this in mind ‘nd i hope u know ‘m always here for u as well! im here for whatever u need or to listen to whatever u wna talk abt, i promise <3 and pls dont apologize for sendin long msgs 😠😠 i truly appreciate it so much n it means the world to me that ur takin time out of ur day to be such a sweetheart to lil ol me ☹️ mwah mwah mwah i adore u

[adetheenby]

i watched the first three episodes of ofmd of s2 and i have a lot of thoughts that i dont really see anyone talkin bout so far, okay before you read this this is my OPINION i know duh it is but some people need to hear that, but if you do disagree with some of the stuff im saying id love to have a normal discussion bout it bc after all its fiction not that serious

might be a bit of a ramble but im making it your problem now

okay so i binged s1 like yesterday and i LOVED it its so funny and good and lucius and the whole crew being very found family was awsome

ending wasnt as bad as i had seen people say, but now overal i really liked season one for just being silly and being a comedy and not taking itself SUPER serious

season two so far i really dont like the direction they are going , let me just put some of my more specific thoughts here

1 im tellinging you NO reason to introduce us to new love interests for the one will they wont they couple, i really hope they stay just friends now since otherwise it has just complicated it so much

2 Zheng, just her whole deal i feel like it again just over complicates it so much now they have either A. an antaganist whos really powerfull and smart and is now personally connected to one of the crew so its gonna be messy if they meet again and they really wouldnt beable to just easily fight her off and while in season one yeah the brits were a threat it was never THAT serious they always had a backup plan and the brits were just fuckin stupid and not being treated as really competent and while yes they did have a more serious scene when they had to get the acts of grace n stuff it wasnt full episodes B. shes a one off and would just feel very mediocre and veryjust made to be a conflicting love interest

3its a bit to serious and lacks the charm it had and has taken away aspects of characters that made them likeable to begin with, blackbeard an unserious pirate whos bored with his life and doesnt directly kill, now so far we see him fucking over his crew and being horrible to them like we are glossing over the fact he was cutting off a guys foot for evertime he spoke up against him and murdering an entire wedding for shits and giggles and not even caring when someone on his crew dies and sure its fiction but i dont know how he can be truly redeemed because i dont think they are gonna let him be bad and are already setting up stuff for him to be redeemed

theres probably more but yk

ON TO STUFF I DO LIKE

1 lucius being back oh my godddd i love him hes my fav character for sure and stedes and his talk about opening up a bit was while kinda ehh a bit sweet even though i feel like it was kinda bs because we dont really see stede bottling up big things like that at all sure he thinks he cant be more then a scared rich boy but yk thats really not that bad back to lucius again i love him i hope as the season goes on we see him heal a bit and get back more of how he was in season 1 nd before anyone says it I KNOW big trauma and how it fucks you up and changes you , been there done that but i still dont completely change and as i healed more which im still doing i was becoming more like my old self again and lucius is such a comedic character i hope they use him well this season:)

2i liked the little story line of them just living with spanish jackie and saving up it was sweet even though it was short, because they arent technically a crew they could all just go their seperate ways yk??? but they dont they CHOOSE to stay, i loved in season one when he had to prove to be a real pirate everyone desperately backing him up incontrast to the first episode where they were planning mutiny

3LUCIUS AND PETE REUNITING i love them and i hope they get to be a happy couple and dont break up bc if they do i will RIOT

4jims haircut, thats it just love the haircut

5 love the crew found family way its very sweet to see both the crews go with that like bonnets whole crew sticking together though they dont really have to and even though blackbeard was being fuckin horrible his crew still had eachother and tried to help and cheer eachother up its way more gloomy then the other crew but i still loved it

EDIT: just realized i love how sstupid the mermaid scene is i REALLY hope this means they will return to the normal humour they had now they they have established the more important stuf like the characters being all together again

love to know what yall think

[whoviandoodler]

Thanks for not being negative on my post, it was a 2am rant that i didnt intend to be read by anyone but those who themselves werent too happy w the book, so im glad that you heeded the warning (also, dont ever apologize for ur language skills when its not ur first lang, if someone picks at it they're being an asshole (it seems great, but im an english major who has a lot of Opinions abt the hegemony of english and the assumption that knowing english perfectly is some kind of bare minimum, so it saddens me when i see other non-native english speakers apologize unnecessarily- own the fact you know more than one language and never apologize for how well or badly you know your 2nd, 3rd, whatever; the people who matter will be glad you know at least some of their language and have put in an effort to communicate with them, and entitled assholes dont deserve attention))

That aside, I have a pretty bad case of post-exams woozy brain, so i hope my reply will be coherent, and i hope it doesnt sound rude, i dont mean it that way, im just giving my perspective. I mainly want to explain that while yes, calling someone queer solely for being flamboyant is stereotyping (dandies are, i suppose, the main argument that comes to mind lol, lots of them were straight and a lot of ppl in history acting in ways we would consider flamboyant now werent seen as queer then), a lot of queer culture is using stereotypes and assumptions to be visible- think if u see someone with blue hair and large earrings; yes, they might well be cishet, but i will assume they are one of ours, and ill give them a compliment that they, if they are indeed queer, will read as recognition.

Especially considering a history of queerness needing to be hidden and only being expressed through signals that other queer people will understand- languages like polari in britain, the handkerchiefs you'd put in your back pockets, saying someone does or doesnt speak latin in some english schools. And some signals are more well-known and have been a more visible signal throughout ages- men with higher voices, who were 'vain', who dressed a certain way-, and were used to queer code characters when they weren't allowed to be canonically queer. Think ryan from hsm- hes flamboyant, and he loves theater, and ashton cucher or whatever that guy's name is; yes, these are stereotypical traits of a queer man, but its those traits that helped 'those who know know' see themselves on screen, and they were purposefully implemented by the writers for that sspecific purpose.

My point is, yes, howl is flamboyant, and yes, flamboyancy is a part of why i read him as queer. He's the definition of a poor little meow meow, he has a college degree, he loves his earring and his hair and his suits and spends exorbitant amounts of money to make things beautiful. He also has ADHD, and the link between neurodivergency and queerness is another thing added to the list (and you could say much the same thing for him being nd- am i allowed to say he's nd bcs his house is a mess and he knows exactly where he put what and if u move it he wont be able to find it? and bcs hes an overthinker and anxious and has to lie to himself in order to get things done? none of these things mean he's nd, but i see my experiences and the experiences of my nd friends in him, and i hence identify him as such bcs he as a character cannot be consulted on his opinions- he exists not as a person, but a mix of traits that can be interpreted in dif ways) . He doesn't want to be a part of the mainstream, he doesnt want to do things other expect him to do. I see part of queer culture in him, and i compile them all unconsciously and read him as queer- a flamboyant university graduate with no real wish in life but to be free of capitalism and pursue his dreams? i'm going to filter that thru my experiences and knowledge, and im going to read him as queer.

I had certain expectations of the narrative, and I didnt get them from it, and i'm so jaded to the stories that end in marriage as the happy ending and have aspects of the kind of romance depicted in the book that i honestly dont believe that ill read it again, or that id have a dif experience if i did. I did come into it expecting a dif thing to the movie, and it wasn't the lack of kisses that discouraged me from getting engaged with their relationship, or that it was different and more real (as i said, they had teeth in the book, which id hoped coming into it since char flaws are what adds depth to a story and more interestingly moves it forward), it was the fact that a relationship made of arguing and snippets of attraction and peace ending in marriage and procreation has never appealed to me either irl or in stories, and tho not exclusive to cishet relationships, it is something that's seen as worth striving towards in some parts of that culture.

It was admittedly my fault that I hadn't checked the date of the book before id read it, and that i expected something of that book that it simply wasnt meant to be, pulled by the queer atmosphere of the movie (i cant fully describe to u how much that movie means to queer people in my circles, and how much we relate to it and see ourselves in it, either bcs howl is gender envy incarnate and has bisexuality vibes thru the roof (i have a bi trans friend who is, essentially, howl), or bcs the vague magical atmosphere of it is inviting).

With that all said, i want to add a disclaimer that ure free to read the book as u like, and to see the characters as you like. The beauty of stories is that we all experience them differently, and i'm not going to knock your interpretation of it any more than i will my own; i will, however, contest the idea that reading a character as queer bcs they embody certain stereotypes of queerness is incorrect and somehow harmful or shallow.

I have and will go on to read a number of books written in times and places where queer rep wasn't and isn't allowed, or is/was stigmatized enough to be avoided outright, and reading those kinds of books with the fear of seeing a character as queer bcs they embody queer stereotypes but havent outright said it is a disservice both to myself and the author's potential intentions.

It's important to remember that chars arent real, living people, and that labeling them as queer or not queer based on what they do and dont do does them no harm like it would to a real, living person (think what happened with kit connor, for example, or what happens to cishet ppl who cant wear what they like bcs someone might keep questioning their identity and not believe their words bcs of it).

(this is a ramble and isn't complimentary, so if you're in this tag purely for positive stuff, please swerve around this post; you have been warned, so pls don't add negativity to this post either, thanks)

Just finished hmc (book) and i have so many conflicting thoughts about it. Like it was obviously very well written in terms of the worldbuilding and the characters and the plot but then with the romance it felt,,, so odd to me.

Maybe it's the fact that it's decades old, but it has that feeling of vagueness that classics and stuff often do, where I don't feel at all invested because it all feels surface level. Like Sophie and Howl clearly have a connection, but I felt like it was never explored in a way that tugged at my heart strings, it was more like they had the grounds for friendship and then bippity boppity they held hands and were getting married.

Which gets me to another thing- this felt very much like someone had taken a very interesting queer character and put them in a very heteronormative romance plot??? Like howl has such major queer vibes, but then he interacts with sophie and vice versa like they're the protags of every heteronormative straight romance book (if there weren't even making out to keep your attention on SOMETHING), and it just feels like they were done dirty even tho they are as the author intended them to be and saw them as.

Idk just... They're such interesting characters and I would have loved to see their love story if it weren't trapped in a heteronormative cage.

The rest of the story is just so incredibly fun and engaging that whenever this stuff popped up and they were forced to play into these roles it felt jarring and left me at the end wondering if I'd just ruined the experience I knew from the ghibli movie and wasted hours just to end up feeling neutral about the story.

[butchviking]

dysphoria is a bastard. i hate it. coping tips?

ok first off. i am not coping

i mean theres all the usual. get strong, see your body as something useful to you and AS you, rather than something to look at. sometimes introspection helps, like ok WHY do i feel this way abt this part of my body and is there anything i can do to counteract that. but tbh sometimes u just hit a wall w that like. ok well i figured out WHY i feel like shit. doesnt do much 2 change it tho. idk everyone is different and everyone’s dysphoria is different and these are things ppl always say have helped them. but i will b totally honest they’ve never done more than placate mine for a short while until it rears its head from some other corner i wasn’t looking at.

the most helpful advice i ever heard is about letting dysphoria come & go. let it pulse in & pulse out. don't do that thing where you let it build up inside you bc its familiar or bc u want to dwell or bc u have smthn to prove or whatever. which i truly think is the best advice for any mental illness nd is the absolute best way i’ve learned 2 cope w my other issues too. life has ups & downs illness has ups & downs and sometimes u gotta just roll w that u cant fight it. some times will suck and other times will not suck so bad and maybe sometimes u even forget its there at all for a little moment! it’s nice to think ‘i know we can get well’ its nice to think someday u will magically overcome all ur issues but for myself at least i think it’s healthier to acknowledge that. some things dont just go away some things are with you for a long long time or even for your entire life. and there’s not much u can do about that except find a way to live with it.

i think personally i took a hard turn a few years go from being trans & embracing the dysphoria & letting it get so big & ugly bc i’d tied my identity into it, to like. finding gendercrit theory, questioning the reasons for my dysphoria, doing some work to alleviate it somewhat, feeling a bit better for a while and thinking oh! looks like i fixed it! i don’t even feel that bad anymore! self-undiagnosing im fine now!! :) which is. one of the dumbest things i couldve done bc then when it DID start 2 rear its head again i was just pushing it down nd being like ‘no we dont indulge that anymore :) im fine im normal now :)’ as though u can just make a mental illness go away if u try real hard and believe in urself. so u gotta not let it build up inside u into a big ugly thing, not indulge it & become friends w it but also acknowledge when it is there and don’t think u can just magic it away. let it ebb & flow let it pulse thru you and then let it go.

[loveless-aro-culture-is]

I hope youre okay with this kind of ask, this isn't about loveless aro culture. I dont quite understand what loveless aro means exactly. Love in that context means love for other people right? Or is it about romantic love specifically? I platonically love my friends, do loveless aros not want friends or family at all? Or do they have familial and platonic relationships but reject the word "love" itself? Even if they reject the word love or not want romantic relationships, everyone still enjoys or has positive feelings towards something, right (examples: pets, hobbies, clothes)? I hope this doesnt come off as rude, I'm trying to educate myself about the topic, and I am asking this as an aro person. I know every loveless aro will have a different personal definition, but I would just like a better understanding. Thank you😋

Sure, no problem!

So like you said it depends on the aro.

Some folks don’t experience any tertiary attraction at all (but, for example, being aplatonic doesn’t mean you don’t want friends, in the same way there are aromantic people who want romantic relationships and asexuals who want sexual ones).

Some of us just reject the word ‘love,’ while still feeling emotions others would call ‘love.’

Others (like me!) have non-normative experiences with ‘love’ (using myself as an example, I’m ND and the way I experience ‘love’ and affection ends up being pretty different than how NTs experience them).

I would say that, yeah, most loveless aros still enjoy things. That being said there are probably going to be some who just… don’t. Like, I find enjoyment in stuff sometimes, but other times I’m just completely neutral about and/or bored of everything. I’m sure there are going to be some loveless aros who are like that all the time, or so much of the time that they don’t notice when they’re not.

Also, enjoyment ≠ love. Some loveless aros might enjoy things but not feel strongly enough about them to think it warrants the label ‘love.’

[1eos]

genuine question. is it weird to call a male idol a babygirl? and how is that misgendering him??? bc why would someone block me over that? i'm sorry but this person is not beating the chronically online bitchless allegations

on its own? no its not weird to me. imo as long as you 1. use the correct pronouns 2. don't call him that to his face and 3. stop if he ever makes it known he doesn't like it then its not a big deal considering babygirl for men too is a big joke online and you're not equating him to be a woman. i held the door open for my guy friend and called him babygirl and he laughed bc he saw all the jokes abt it. ofc if he didnt like it i wouldnt call him that nd that could def be considered misgendering.

and everyone has the right not to like tumblr jokes so they have every right to block you even if its trivial but that doesnt make u weird. tbh i wouldnt take much stock in it bc while its true we dont know if male idols like to be called babygirl you'd be hard pressed to find someone who DOESNT address idols in ways they dont know they like. calling them gay icons, himbos, bimbos, calling them animal names, thots, crackheads. i could go on so there's a 99% chance the person that blocked you does or endorses someone doing the same thing with a different word so you shouldnt be too worried about it 😭😭😭😭😭 cuz while some ppl absolutely do feminize kpop boys using babygirl a few times isn't even scratching the surface of weirdness imo

[creacherkeeper]

hey same anon from before!! and yeah i meant general headcanons/ aelwyn + the bad kids dynamics/ honestly whatever fh headcanons you have so lmao you’re good. if you have any more know i would LOVE to read them but no pressure of course!!

oh okay dope ^^ thank you for clarifying. but ...... while we’re here ...... MIGHT AS WELL TALK ABOUT SOME ND HEADCANONS EHH??

of course disclaimer that these are just my own reading and everyone is entitled to read it differently, but i’ll try to back up my takes as much as i can

-

adaine (autism & panic disorder) - detail-oriented problem solver, thrives under the structure of school but doesnt do well with overwhelm, organized, seems sensitive to noises (like if the bad kids are being loud or rowdy), extremely earnest and forward even in situations where its inappropriate and doesnt always understand when its actually hurting her goals (see: every time an npc has to go “whats your deal? can i help you?” to adaine), tends to fumble some spontaneous speech (come backs in fights or like. the WHOLE thing with the innkeeper), very knowledgeable and skilled in a specific area of interest (divination magic), thrives with an emotional support animal, possibly ace (for sure not all autistic people are but we tend to be in much higher numbers), vibes with ayda almost immediately (by like. just straight up asking if she wants to be friends), very direct when talking, strong sense of justice and morality and gets very frustrated when things dont work how she thinks they should

riz (autistic) - hyperfixates on cases (both in the ‘losing track of time’ and ‘has trouble thinking of other things while out and about’ way), odd sense of fashion, has trouble making friends and understanding relationship dynamics (him thinking he was friends with the popular kids in ep1, being obsessed with finding penny who was his babysitter but then they dont really hang out after, being very verbal about fabian being his best friend even though fabian is embarrassed), ace, detail-oriented problem solver, sleeping issues, CAN lie but tends to be very direct to the point of being rude and abrasive at times, very defined moral code and strong sense of justice, easily frustrated in certain situations, intimidated by social interactions (especially with people he doesnt know), struggles with self-care and self-maintenance, i dont know exactly how to categorize the hissing but im throwing that in here too, doesnt always have “average” emotional reactions (like being really excited about the video of his dad instead of upset), very mature interests for his age

gorgug (autistic) - trouble with communication (putting his thoughts into words, tends to speak very slowly with a lot of pauses, doesnt always know what to say or what the average person in his situation would say), has a hard time making friends, struggles with emotional regulation (you can read barbarian rage as this in general but im also thinking of him getting mad at the high elves and just having to run around to calm down), very emotionally intelligent but doesnt always come across that way because of communication struggles, understands the value of having things explained in a simple and accessible way and does so without judgement or embarrassment if others need him to, thinks in a different way and comes to conclusions others dont seem to (sometimes he’s completely correct and other times .... dad!?), uses sensory input to regulate emotions (mostly music/drumming), screams when overwhelmed, doesn’t always ‘get the point’, is a very good friend but is so with great intention and care

fabian (adhd + dyslexia) - doesnt enjoy school, has some Very Bad Rolls when it comes to books and reading, doesnt think he’s as smart as his friends, struggles with a disconnect of identity (how he sees himself and his family vs how other people see him), very physical and physically active, tends to default to loud and “rowdy” (as adaine put it), struggles with emotional regulation, very sensitive but would NOT admit that, doesn’t always understand social cues or when he’s being rude, struggles with impulse control

fig (adhd + autism) - sensory seeking (especially music & the physical element of playing music which can be read as stimming, as well as smoking cloves), disconnect between how she sees herself (mysterious closed book) and how others see her (incredibly open and earnest), feels like a social chameleon and slips into roles very easily but has trouble feeling like and understanding herself; very excitable, engaged, reactive, and verbal; runs away when she feels uncomfortable or overwhelmed, tends to wander from the group a lot, admits several times that she wasn’t paying attention or doesnt remember key info about the plot, builds an identity around deviation from societal norms, big emotions, lots of energy, cares very deeply but actively works on understanding boundaries, doesnt always pick up on social cues

kristen (cptsd) - discussed in this post but can be summed up as issues with affect and emotional regulation, cognitive/executive functioning issues, difficulty with boundaries, struggles with impulse control, goes from VERY self-restrictive to VERY loose with sexual activity, drugs, alcohol, tattoos, etc; struggles with self-concept, doubt, and trust issues; possibly has dissociative and/or depersonalization tendencies with her cleric abilities 

so 8))))) yeah. bad kids neurodivergence headcanons ahoy