#i dont mean to spam y'all

[kronos-lungbarrow-oakdown]

Me: being absolutely new to RPG and definitely too young to play heavy stuff getting traumatised about it and going years without playing.

Person who was 3 years older than me & taught me to play heavy stuff when they dropped RPG and left me addicted & traumatized + depended on their constant answers: let's be clear, I did absolutely nothing wrong, I'm not to blame. It's not my fault.

[bvidzsoo]

Love Me Like A Rockstar (9)

ー☆ Chapter 9: You (Show Me Where My Days Went)

Author: bvidzsoo

Pairing: Song Mingi x female reader

ー☆ Warning: cursing ー☆ Word count: 9.8k ー☆ Genre: university!au, enemies to lovers!au, rockstar!au ー☆ Rating: sfw ー☆ Summary: Love. You wanted none of it. You had already been heartbroken very badly once, you didn't wish to go through that ever again. But the Universe works in intricate ways and, somehow, you found yourself webbed up in a local rockstar's life, Song Mingi. He was everything you expected him to be, yet nothing like you imagined him he would be. What happens when you find mutual understanding and have heartful conversations? Will he be able to break down your walls? Will you be able to chase away his darkness?

A/N: Hi, lovelies!! LMLAR is BACK!! I am sooo happy I could finally update and just write, y'all have no idea! I am so sorry for making you wait so long for this update, but finishing my thesis was super important! I still have to study and such this month, but I promise next update won't take as long as this one did! (I'm writing other stories too while writing this one, so that kinda backfires sometimes lol) I am forever grateful that you are patient and stick around for the new chapters, this story is so dear to me you wouldn't even believe it. I am also super grateful and happy whenever you leave feedback, so please, keep on doing just that!<3 This chapter only exists because I was randomly inspired, and I'd like to apologize if it's a little rusty, I always have to get in "character" when I write this story lol. I am soo excited for next chapter, I think it's going to surprise you hehe. PLS PLS imagine that airport look from Mingi when reading this chapter, the pics from the moodboard, you'll see during which part! I also have a very small surprise at the end of this chapter hehe. I hope the time jumps aren't too confusing:(( Please, listen to the song called You before or while reading! Enough yapping, I hope you enjoy and leave feedback! (Taglist is always open for those interested! ^^)

Taglist: @orshii @or5i @lovely-red2 @scarfac3 @juicy-red @sunaswifes-blog @voicesinmyhead-rc @teez-the-time @maru-matt @kyeos4ng @deathbyyeekies @chicksmoothie @mjlbn01 @xhexy @tmtxtf @hwashiningstar @thatfavouritesong @ateez-atiny380

⟨Series M.list ↭ Previous Chapter⟩

♫Playlist♫

Later that day

I hate him: hey…just checking in that I got home safely what are u up to?

I blinked, fingers tightening around my phone before I locked it, leaving the message on unread. My mother’s shuffling outside my door caught my attention, bringing a smile onto my lips as I watched her struggle while bringing all the dirty laundry to the bathroom. Then, I got off my bed to go help her.

Friday (11:30 am)

I hate him: i see u still haven’t checked my message… nothing too worrisome u certainly know how to make a man yearn for you lol that was a joke…dont freak out on me pls (lowkey true tho)

Friday (12:50 pm)

I hate him: lol, wooyoung has been bitching about seulgi’s professor for half an hour now mr. kwon u know him? i mean…i suppose he also teaches u i should take a sneaky video for u…wooyoung looks like a clown hanging upside down my bed and pouting like a damn child too (dont say im also one, thanks)

Friday (15:26 pm)

I hate him: well…ik my messages are going through so uh… why tf are u ignoring me???! *cries and dies in loneliness* entertain me dollll!!! im so bored pls oh…u said u had an important assignment…i bet u’re busy with that sorry for spamming u (text back tho when u’re done, im dying here…wooyoung is with seulgi and so is seonghwa with hongjoong…the single life sucks, bestie…lets be single and depressed together<3)

My jaw clenched as I heaved a long sigh, falling back on my bed as the sun shone brightly through my open window, the light breeze making me shiver as I only wore a t-shirt and sweats. Autumn was slowly turning into winter; the weather wasn’t so warm anymore. I threw another look at my phone, unlocked it, and stared at the received messages from Mingi for a second before finally deciding to delete them from my notification center, rolling over in bed to muffle a frustrated scream into my soft, and purple, pillow.

            Saturday (9:09 am)

I hate him: i had the weirdest dream and im not even sure i want to tell u about it LOL but uh…a grisly was chasing me??? and then u appeared on a fucking white horse like a prince LOL and threatened to like…slay it if it didnt leave me alone??? honestly…what a slay, bestie good morning, btw, doll hope u had a better night’s sleep than me (and dreamed of me ehehehe)

            Saturday (17:40 pm)

I hate him: i cant believe i allowed myself to be fooled like this back in highschool yuyu and i used to play baseball for shits and giggles and hongjoong (that rich prick) rented a whole ass baseball field for us for the afternoon and let us play with some of his (rich af) friends and uh… i think i wont be able to walk straight for another week with how much running i did… hongjoong kept scoring homeruns…i wish yuyu was here to kick his loser ass (dont tell hwa or hong i said that PLS) yo doll…everything’s alright with u? uh u…really havent answered me since… yk…i stayed over and waited for the rain to stop… have i done something wrong?

I sighed and put my phone on ‘do not disturb’, suddenly having lost all of my appetite as I forced the rest of the lettuce down my throat. My mother was sipping her kiwi and apple smoothie, eyes narrowed as she muttered to herself while trying to memorize the recipe of a dessert for later. Desserts were never her forte, unfortunately.

“Is it Seulgi?” She asked absentmindedly as I took a large gulp of my own smoothie, staring down at my salad, steak pushed to the side in my plate.

“Huh?” I asked distracted, eyes still glued to the dark screen of my phone.

“Texting you, your phone keeps buzzing, my starlight.” I rolled my eyes at the nickname, but didn’t bother to comment on it. I took a peek at my mother and her eyes were narrowed at me already, video on YouTube paused. Fuck, I had to answer her now or else she’d pester me all day long. And that would be a nightmare.

“Yeah, it’s Seulgi.” I lied, trying to make my voice sound convincing.

“Well, answer her then, don’t be rude.” My mother chastised me, pressing play on her video again, pursing her lips as she shook her head at whatever the man baking was saying.

“Later.” I whispered, biting my lower lip as my eyes remained glued to my phone, stomach clenching and heart dropping.

But I couldn’t.

            Sunday (1:01 am)

I hate him: …you’re ignoring me, arent u? im sorry, y/n, i dont know what i did wrong, but we can talk about it we’re friends, after all…right?

『When you came along, I knew what was wrong

If you want to know exactly what I've missed』

            Monday (present time)

            It truly would have been a missed opportunity if Seulgi and I wouldn’t have grabbed coffee and went to sit in our usual spot in the back garden. The campus of our University was huge and that was perfect, because it meant people migrated and didn’t stay in one spot for long—at least long enough to irritate me to no end. Last week deemed to be rather rough, and I still didn’t feel like completely myself. To be honest, I thought about staying home today—and for the rest of the week—but I couldn’t afford missing any of my classes as exam period was slowly nearing, and so, I had to force my ass out of the house this morning before my mother could come and nag me about my weirdly unusual broody mood that has been going on for the past few days.

I hummed as I took a sip of my sweet coffee, enjoying the taste of warm caramel as Seulgi sighed loudly next to me, both hands cupped around her own coffee cup. The scent of cinnamon wafted from her cup and I scrunched up my nose, not too fond of the ingredient’s smell. Our classes started early in the morning today and we’d be here for at least four more hours, caffeine seemed like our only hope to stay awake and aware at this point. Given the fact that my baffling thoughts kept me up all night yesterday, I felt grateful that I was still on my feet at two o’clock at noon. As Seulgi fidgeted again, I chuckled and finally turned my head to look at her. She had a sheepish look on her face, and I tried not to laugh as I knew she was bursting to tell me all about her date with Wooyoung on Saturday.

“Well,” I started as I took a sip of my coffee, prolonging the suspense for her, “how did your date go?”

“It was amazing!” I had barely finished asking as Seulgi exclaimed, her cheeks turning rosy—and it wasn’t due to the cold air, “Wooyoung is—everything I thought he would be. He’s sweet and up for anything, he makes me laugh until I feel like passing out, and there’s just never a dull moment with him, you know?”

“One would expect that from him.” I muttered against my cup, laughing as Seulgi nudged my side, not looking too happy with my comment, “Oh, come on, it would be hard for Wooyoung to be different than the way he mostly presents himself; don’t you think?”

Seulgi grumbled something against her cup as she lightly bit into the carton, shooting me a pointed stare, “Well, yes, but…he makes me happy. Treats me well and all that, you know, he’s the perfect embodiment of what a boyfriend should be like.”

“Boyfriend, huh?” I teased with a smirk, wriggling my eyebrows at my best friend as her cheeks flushed an even darker color as she bit her lower lip, trying to mask the huge grin expanding on her lips. But as soon as I started giggling, Seulgi also broke out in a fit of giggles, hiding herself behind her wavy hair, pressing her cup of coffee against her face.

“God, I’m so down bad for him, Y/N, I don’t think you’d understand.” She mused, voice airy as she threw her head back, leaning back against the back of the bench. I chuckled and took another sip of my drink.

“Maybe I’d do.” I muttered, memories of my relationship with Yunho resurfacing. Thankfully, however, I managed to repress them as quickly as they came. They didn’t feel so gut-wrenching anymore, and to my surprise, didn’t leave a bitter taste in its wake either. What has changed? Certainly—certainly getting closer to his best friend didn’t influence the way I feel about Yunho, right? Right.

“So,” I glanced at Seulgi from the corner of my eyes as she swung her legs, looking down at her feet in the process, “how are you?”

“Fine, why?” I asked confused, angling my body to face Seulgi better.

“You’ve been…distant the whole weekend. I could barely reach you.” Seulgi’s voice sounded small and I gulped, feeling bad for making her worry about me, “You know…the last time you pulled away and disappeared, it was bad.”

“I promise you I am doing completely fine, Seulgi, you’d be the first person to know if I was in a bad headspace again, alright?” I reached out and grabbed her hand, squeezing it reassuringly. Seulgi sighed and then raised her head to look at me, lips pulled into a thin line.

“Promise?”

“Of course, I promise.” I smiled at her warmly and she hummed in contentment, squeezing my hand back as she took a sip of her coffee. I followed suit before removing my hand from hers to fiddle with my half empty cup, “I’m just dealing with some things right now. I think I’m confused.”

“About what?” Seulgi asked curiously, leaning closer as I continued to avoid eye contact with her.

“I’ll tell you once I have my thoughts sorted about it.” I chuckled, making Seulgi roll her eyes in displeasure.

“You know, I tell you absolutely everything about myself and how I fell, and you always shut me out and tell me how you felt about a situation when it’s been over for years.” Seulgi pouted, narrowing her eyes at me, “How’s that fair, Y/N?”

“Hey, we work differently, don’t try to guilt trip me now.” I chuckled and took a sip of my coffee, making Seulgi roll her eyes, “Anyways, what did you do on your date with Wooyoung?”

“We went to the cinema,” Seulgi’s face lit up once again, grinning from ear to ear, “He bought me roses, a big bouquet. And after the movie we went for a walk and ended up stargazing in his cabriolet. It was really romantic.”

I smiled, feeling happy for my friend, she deserved someone like Wooyoung, “That actually sounds really amazing…and romantic.”

“Oh, my God, are you really Y/N? Where is my friend that hates anything that has to do with romance, cute stuff, and love?!” Seulgi’s shocked face was mocking and I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms in front of my chest as I leaned back against the back of the bench.

“I don’t hate it, I’m just not a huge fan of all of those things, okay?!” I shrugged, letting my arms fall from my chest as I pushed them inside my coat’s pockets.

“Who’s the culprit?” When I raised my eyebrows at Seulgi, a sign that I didn’t understand her question, she chuckled and leaned closer, “Who’s the man that’s changing your views on life, huh?”

“Man?” I asked with a scoff, giving Seulgi a deadpanned expression, “Does it always have to be about a man? Can’t it be just the fact that I had a change of mind?”

“Sure, because of someone.” Seulgi had a smug look on her face, acting as if she won the argument. But there was no argument here and she had no idea what she was talking about.

“Whatever—” But I got cut off as her phone dinged loudly. Seulgi, very comically, scrambled to reach for her phone and as she opened it up, a wide grin stretched onto her lips. It didn’t take two braincells to realize who had texted her, and thus, I chuckled and turned my head. I sipped my coffee, taking in my environment while Seulgi answered her boyfriend, giggling quietly every now and then.

The campus was finally silent and not as busy as it usually was in the early morning hours. The cold weather also helped in keeping the garden a little quieter as most people preferred to stay inside the warm corridors and classrooms. But the chilly air was good, it soothed my nerves and erased thoughts that weren’t productive. Similar to that, were the emotions that I didn’t want to deal with again, like the guilt that’s never left me ever since Mingi walked out of my house wearing Yunho’s old clothes. It felt wrong letting him take them without knowing the truth about them, but I didn’t feel ready to tell him yet about the truth. I was scared, surprisingly, of what he’d think of me once he found out about Yunho and I. I was scared that—he’d walk away, like Yunho had once done. And that was a very frightening thought. But when had I become so attached to Mingi? When has Mingi managed to infiltrate himself so thoroughly in my life, that the thought of completely losing him became scary? And why was I taking the past few days so badly? It’s not like we were as close as Seulgi and I, or him and Seonghwa and Wooyoung, yet, ignoring him felt like the wrong move to do. However, the reasoning I always circled back to was the fact that I needed space. I had to clear my mind, to find the purpose of this whole friendship that’s been blooming between us, and to make sense of everything. I had to figure out first why Yunho barely scraped my thoughts now, and why was it was Mingi who I found myself thinking of so often. In case you were wondering, no, I still haven’t found the reason, and it was becoming frustrating quite quickly. That near kiss was a—mistake. Yet, it could have been so much worse—it could have been a real kiss. And a real kiss would have ruined everything. I didn’t want to open up to anyone just yet, not when the memories of Yunho still haunted me in my dreams and drawings. Drawings that now more often than not consisted of Song Mingi.

And to my horror, the flipping of paper sheets is what alerted me back to my surroundings as I had been lost in my thoughts, oblivious to Seulgi putting her phone down and grabbing my sketchbook that lay between the two of us on the bench. As I turned my head, my eyes widened as Seulgi’s expression held surprise but amusement as well. She chuckled as she looked up, making eye contact with me. I lunged forward in an instant, trying to take my sketchbook out of her hands, but she leaned back and away, putting it behind herself.

“Bitch, I’m not the only one who’s down bad for a man.” She said with a laugh, making me groan as I gave up trying to snatch my sketchbook back from her.

“I’m not down bad for a man, Seulgi, stop this non-sense.” I hissed, cheeks burning in embarrassment as she kept flipping through my drawings.

“Please,” She scoffed, turning my sketchbook around and making me grimace as I came face to face with an exact replica of Mingi, sitting in his chair, at his studio that one time he invited me inside, “Who the fuck draws so many drawings of one single person if they aren’t in love with them—”

“I’m not in love with Mingi, stop it!” I exclaimed, heart beating fast as Seulgi raised her eyebrows at me, looking unimpressed, “Don’t ever again say that, Seulgi.”

“Okay, calm down, whatever. You’re not in love with Mingi.” She chuckled, closing my sketchbook but she didn’t hand it back yet, “But let’s face it, Y/N, you have a thing for Mingi. It’s super freaking obvious even without the drawings.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” I hissed and finally snatched the sketchbook out of her hands, clutching it to my chest. I knew bringing this along today would turn out to be a mistake, and here I was, facing the repercussions of my actions.

“There’s this glint in your eyes whenever you look at him—”

“Yeah, it’s called dislike.” I scoffed, rolling my eyes.

“And I see how you struggle to refrain yourself from smiling when you’re around him—”

“Bitch, be for real, Mingi and I aren’t even often together around you for you to notice that.” I scoffed, completely appealed by whatever absurd claims my best friend was making.

“So you’re not denying it—would it really be so bad if you liked Mingi?” But Seulgi ignored all my interruption as she raised her eyebrows at me, smiling softly, “He’s a nice guy. Very well-mannered and with a big, and good heart. Wooyoung loves him a lot and is always worrying about him. He says Mingi hasn’t been the same ever since his best friend moved away for college—”

“Mingi is Yunho’s best friend!” I blurted out before I could stop myself, finally feeling like a stone was taken off my chest as I bit my lower lip, averting my eyes from Seulgi’s shocked expression, “Mingi is the best friend Yunho had always talked so much about while we were together. I—do you understand why it would be so bad if I ended up liking Mingi?”

“Y/N,” Seulgi whispered, eyebrows furrowed, “for how long have you know?”

“Long enough.” I muttered before clearing my throat, “So please understand that I’m not ready for whatever the hell me drawing all those sketches of Mingi could mean. A month ago I was close to bursting out crying even at the thought of Yunho, and now I fail to remember his existence on my best days.”

When I dared take a peek at Seulgi, she was smiling softly, almost proudly, “Fine, I’ll pester you about this later on, when you’ve figured things out, but until then—you can’t deny Mingi isn’t hot—”

“Can we stop talking about Min—”

“Hi, girls!” I jumped in fright at the overly excited and shrill greeting as both Seulgi and I turned our heads to be met with…Wooyoung and Mingi. Speak of the devil. Suddenly, there was a lump in my throat, and my heart started beating just a little bit faster as my eyes fell on Mingi’s tall form. It didn’t help that underneath his coat he was wearing Yunho’s sweater—the one I had given him.

“Hi.” Seulgi giggled as Wooyoung leaned down to press a kiss against her cheek, the two looking sickly in love. It was actually endearing, but I’d never admit it out loud for my own sake as I knew I’d get teased about it by Seulgi. I averted my eyes from Wooyoung and Seulgi as they were muttering things to each other, and so, had no choice but to look up at Mingi, who looked—expressionless. Something in my stomach dropped at his cold demeanor, and it was worse that I wanted to assume it was my fault that he looked like that. But just as I was about to look away, he cracked the tiniest smile ever, and I exhaled, licking my lips.

“Hi.” My voice was small as I gulped, eyes trans-fixated on the tall man as his smile became just a little wider. I don’t think I had the power to ignore him anymore, not when he was standing right in front of me, looking like he wished to be anywhere but here.

“Hi, Y/N.” Having not heard his voice in days, it sounded even deeper and raspier than usually, making butterflies erupt in my stomach as my grip tightened around my sketchbook. I felt a little awkward, perhaps even tense, as Mingi didn’t say anything else, just continued gazing down at me with his sharp dark brown eyes boring into my own. I had so many things that I could’ve said to him, but I felt tongue tied. I didn’t know what would be the right way to approach him after I ignored him for so many days. Would he understand? Is he mad at me now? Does he hate me now? Will he forgive me—

“Okay,” Wooyoung chuckled, syllable drawn out and sounding amused, “I feel like I’m interrupting something here, yet they are basically just staring at each other.”

“You’re right.” Seulgi giggled, and I finally looked away from Mingi, throwing a glare at my best friend as she had leaned into Wooyoung’s side, who stood next to the bench and her.

“Shush, you two.” Mingi beat me to telling the two love-birds off, and I couldn’t help but smile, “Don’t poke your nose where it doesn’t belong to.”

“Look who’s lecturing me about poking my nose where it doesn’t belong to—”

“Wooyoung.” Mingi’s tone held a warning, and it made Wooyoung giggle as he leaned down and pressed a fat kiss against Seulgi’s cheek—again—making her push him away playfully.

“We’re headed to class, are you coming over later?” Wooyoung smiled down at his girlfriend, playing with a strand of her hair.

“Maybe, if I get to finish my project.” Seulgi said with a pout and Wooyoung hummed, leaning down to press a kiss against her lips this time around. I averted my eyes, not a fan of seeing couples kiss, only to catch Mingi already looking at me. He was expressionless once again, but he was fidgeting with his fingers, looking almost nervous. And as Wooyoung stood up straight and ruffled Seulgi’s hair affectionately, Mingi took a deep breath.

“Will you come to Outlaw this Friday?” He asked in a rush, sounding almost reluctant as his eyebrows furrowed slightly and he chewed on his lower lip. To my horror, I found my eyes fixated on his plush mouth and I gulped before I quickly averted my eyes, praying that nobody caught it.

“Yes.” I answered before Seulgi could, and nodded, smiling a little bit, “I won’t miss it.”

A beautiful smile spread on Mingi’s lips and he nodded once, looking too happy for something so little. I don’t think I’ll understand anytime soon why he gets so excited and happy when I listen to his songs or watch him perform. I’m no expert when it comes to music, my feedback is merely amateur and I’m not even a fan of his band yet.

“Cool, see you then.” And Mingi didn’t wait for Wooyoung as he turned around and walked away, steps hurried. I didn’t miss the confused glance Wooyoung and Seulgi shared before Wooyoung was off, chasing after his best friend. And maybe I would be soon able to make sense of my thoughts and feelings around Mingi, figure out what they meant and why they felt so real at times.

            Monday (16:58 pm)

I hate him: hi Me: hi I hate him: would it be a lot if i asked to meet u tomorrow? Me: no, im free in the afternoon I hate him: cool, me too so uh…we can hang out in my studio? Me: or we can go to that new café with pottery I hate him: really? Me: u did say u wanted us to go… I hate him: i certainly said so i’ll pick u up around 4 Me: u don’t have to i’ll meet you there I hate him: come on, y/n…let me drive u Me: u’ve driven me around too many times by now i’ll meet u there and that’s final. I hate him: okay, boss, see ya there Me: :))

            Getting here before four o’clock and having to wait in front of the cute café had no business being this nerve-wrecking. Yeah, Mingi hasn’t shown up yet—but perhaps that’s because there were still ten minutes until it’d be four—and I knew I had no reason to think he’d bail on me, but we hadn’t spoken since yesterday, when he had asked me if we could hang out. And so, waiting for him shouldn’t have had me breaking out in a sweat despite the cold weather, making me bite my lower lip harshly as I tried to smooth down the wool, green, brown, and beige patterned coat I was wearing. First of all, why the hell would I be so nervous about meeting up with Mingi alone at this cute café? He probably wanted to talk about that near kiss, and once we had that cleared, things would go back to normal—right?!

And maybe that was the reason which made me want to vomit on the sidewalk, the thought that I knew Mingi would demand answers—answers that I wasn’t yet ready to hand out. Why did I even agree to this? Because I missed him? I should have just stayed at home and done the project I’ve been procrastinating on—again. But when I heard the rumble of Mingi’s old Honda’s engine, I knew there was no turning back, catching the bus and running home to hide underneath my blanket.

As Mingi took his time to parallel park, I took a deep breath and gripped onto the strap of my tote bag harder, looking down at myself. My apricot orange sneakers matched the color of my blouse, the top two buttons out of five undone, but not showing too much skin. My blouse was tucked inside my washed out high waisted mom jeans, the black belt matching the color of my tote bag—I know black isn’t a color, I’m an arts major after all. My hair was pulled in a low ponytail just to prevent the wind from blowing it in my face, and I was thankful that I chose my wool coat as it kept me warm enough. I have opted to wear quite a few rings today, and because my neck felt too exposed, I decorated it with three necklaces of different length. I gulped hard one last time as Mingi got out of his car and took a few seconds until he managed to lock it. However, those few seconds were exactly what I needed to prepare myself to not pass out at the full sight of him.

Mingi, in true fashion to him, wore all black, except for his jeans that were a very dark shade of blue, almost black too. His turtleneck was tucked inside his jeans, a black coat with a hood keeping him warm from the cold late autumn weather. It almost made me smile upon seeing his own tote bag, black, and funnily matching mine. Except that his was plain, while mine had Claude Monet’s Water-Lily Pond painting painted on it, done by none other than yours truly, me. Mingi’s eyes were concealed by black sunglasses, and I snorted as he almost splashed himself up by stepping a little too enthusiastically into a big puddle. Two necklaces hung around his neck, reaching down his chest. A very obvious and sturdy silver cross necklace, and another longer chain that had pearls scarcely strung on it.  And in true Song Mingi fashion, his rings weren’t missing, only two of his nails painted black on each hand, almost as if he didn’t have time to finish doing them. My heart racing in my chest so fast just at the mere sight of him, certainly wasn’t healthy, right?

“Hi!” I squeaked out and wished to burry myself instantly as Mingi chuckled, a very charming smile spreading onto his lips. It was a little annoying that I couldn’t see his eyes, forced to stare at his plush lips instead—let’s be real, nobody forced me, I did it because I couldn’t help myself, “The sun is quite blinding today, isn’t it?”

And of course, in good old fashion, my mouth worked before my brain would agree to saying something out loud, and my cheeks were burning as I knew Mingi saw me look at his lips. I had to divert the attention somehow, and teasing him was my best method, actually. It always worked.  

“I’m trying to make a fashion statement,” Mingi grinned as he gripped the sunglasses and took them off in a very unnaturally hot way, “but hello to you too.”

“No need for a fashion statement when it’s just the two of us,” I narrowed my eyes, finding Mingi’s hair very soft and fluffy looking, almost as if he had recently washed it, and it wasn’t completely dry, “I’m not one of your fans.”

“Pity,” Mingi hummed, stepping slightly closer to me, “I thought I might just finally wove you.”

I scoffed, and as I was about to tell him off, he grabbed my tote bag and pulled me after himself, headed for the entrance of the café, “Did you have to wait long for me? Traffic was busier today, I had to take a few detours to get here in time.”

“Don’t worry,” I smiled as he opened the door for me and let me walk inside first, “I only waited half an hour for you to arrive, runway princess.”

“Runway princess?!” Mingi’s eyes bulged for a second before he started laughing loudly, making a few customers glance our way as we made it inside the café. I elbowed him in the stomach gently, not too keen of having people glare at us as he disturbed their peace.

“Don’t like the nickname?” I asked with a raised brow as we neared the front desk. The cashier had a friendly smile on her face while she greeted us as Mingi and I looked up at the menu, trying to decide what we’d like to have.

“Never said that,” Mingi answered with a chuckle as he threw me a quick glance, “it’s just surprising coming from you.”

“Why, can’t I call you a princess?” I chuckled, turning to face the cashier as I have made up my mind about what I’d like to have.

“Up until now you seemed to prefer the term ‘bro’, but I’m fine with whatever you decide on calling me, doll.” The look the cashier gave us made my cheeks flame up and I cleared my throat loudly, shooting Mingi a look that told him to shut up.

“Sorry about that,” I muttered embarrassed, smiling at the cashier, “can I get a strawberry cheesecake?”

“Sure, right away, and you, sir?” Her attention was on Mingi now, cheeks flushing the longer she looked at him. Okay, I could totally understand why. Mingi looked quite good right now, it was hard not to ogle him.

“A mint-chocolate cheesecake and a cappuccino?” Mingi hummed, eyebrows furrowed in thought as he looked down at the cashier.

“Plain cappuccino or with vanilla?” The cashier typed in our orders as she asked Mingi, averting her eyes shyly once he looked at her, pursing his lips.

“Plain,” He decided at last, turning to look at me, “are you not getting anything to drink?”

“An orange fresh will be alright.” I said as I reached inside my bag to fish around for my wallet.

“And would you also like to paint some pottery?” The cashier asked, pointing behind herself at all the displayed options. Mingi and I shared a look and I smiled as I nodded at him, making him grin from ear to ear.

“Yeah, we’ll paint some pottery too. Can I have a cup?” He asked, pointing at one on the higher shelf. It was a smaller cup, specifically made for drinking coffee. The cashier nodded and then looked at me expectantly.

“Uh, a mug will do for me.” I said and thanked her once she handed us the pottery and the paint that was used for painting these. Then, she tapped a few more on her tablet and told us the total. I opened my wallet to pay for my purchase, but Mingi had a card in his hands, the cashier already typing in the total sum for him to pay.

“Mingi,” I hissed quietly, looking at him with a frown, “what are you doing?”

“It was my idea to come here—”

“No, it wasn’t.” I cut him off, fingers curling into the scratchy fabric of his coat as I reached out to hold it, “I suggested we come here instead of going to your studio.”

Mingi sighed and pocketed his card, already having paid, then turned his body to face mine. I didn’t let go of his coat just yet, “Yeah, but when I drove you home during that downpour I asked you if you’d come here with me. So technically, it was my idea. Initially, anyways, it really was.”

“Mingi—” I started, but soon swallowed my words as he stepped closer, invading my personal space. My fingers tightened more into his coat and I gulped, suddenly feeling nervous due to our proximity. He faintly smelled of vanilla, it was a fragrance I didn’t except to smell on him.

“Can you not fight me on this one, please?” Mingi’s eyebrows slightly furrowed and his eyes softened up and I—struggled to breathe for a second as I stared up in his pleading eyes, mouth going dry. He looked—adorable like this, and I did not like the way I felt myself getting lost in his soft gaze.

“Let’s find a table.” I muttered, forcing myself out of the trance he placed on me, and grabbed my mug and the painting supplies. Mingi followed suit as he took his own cup and followed after me closely. We walked further inside the café and found a smaller table in the next room, closer towards the window. The walls were painted a faint orange and were decorated by white stripes that created abstract shapes. The chandeliers were white and hung low, the place well-lit for those who wished to paint pottery.

I placed the things in my hands on the table carefully, and then discarded my coat on the back of my chair and my tote bag by the leg of the table, pulling my chair out for myself. Mingi followed suit, however, he managed to almost send his cup tumbling to the floor when he took his seat. His eyes were wide as he just barely caught the cup, and I giggled as I watched him while opening the box that held all the paint. Thankfully, the table was spacious enough to harbor both our pottery and paints as the cashier brought out our delicacies. She threw Mingi a lasting look before she hurried back to the front desk, glancing our way at times.

“This is going to be a tough one.” Mingi said before scooping up a bit of his cheesecake with his little spoon.

“Why?” I asked with a chuckle, choosing a thin brush to start painting some flowers on my mug. My cheesecake could wait.

“Because I’m literally sat at a table with an arts major, having to decorate some cup by painting.” Mingi sounded stressed and I chuckled as I looked up at him, amused by his expression. His hair fell in his eyes a bit, and I found myself absentmindedly reaching over the table to brush it to the side. Almost as if realizing at the same time what I had done, we both froze. It felt like time stilled around us as I watched Mingi with a gaping mouth, slowly but surely, my cheeks becoming the color of a fire hydrant. But Mingi wasn’t better off as he bit his bottom lip, averting his eyes shyly as his cheeks turned the faint color of pink. Clearing my throat and accidentally choking as I hastily pulled my hand back, I averted my eyes and fought for my life to not choke. Thank God the orange juice was right there, I quickly took three large gulps.

“Th—thanks.” Mingi stuttered, staring at the table as he licked his lips, “Uh, it’s gotten long, my hair, I mean, I have to cut it when I get the time.”

“Yeah.” I nodded, grabbing my mug and chewing on my bottom lip in embarrassment—God, could the Earth swallow me up right now? Why the hell did I do that?! “Yeah.”

“Do you think I should change it up a little?” I paused as I had dipped my brush in red paint, and slowly looked up at Mingi, “Do something fun with it—like going blonde?”

“I hate blonde hair.” I blurted out before I could stop myself. Nice one, idiot. Yunho was blonde while we were together, and thus, yeah, I’ve hated blondes ever since. And to be fair—and this is not me shitting on my ex—but that hair color did not suit Yunho at all.

“Oh, noted.” Mingi whispered, pouting a little. I sighed and looked up at the ceiling, hating myself for the weird atmosphere I have created.

“Mingi, you can do whatever you want with your hair.” I spoke up, leaning down to try and look him in the eyes as he was busy staring at the table, “My opinion shouldn’t matter. It’s your hair. Go crazy with it, have fun, try out something new. Really.”

“But do you think it would suit me?” Mingi was still pouting as he finally looked up at me, looking quite crestfallen. My eyebrows furrowed and I tried to imagine him with blonde hair. He was quite blessed with his skin complex as most colors looked good on him, but perhaps I preferred Mingi with dark hair—black hair, more specifically. Like he had it right now. He looked—good. Handsome, even. Completely gorgeous. Fuck.

“I think it would suit you.” I settled on saying that. He didn’t have to know my train of thought, like at all. Mingi hummed in appreciation, and I watched as he reached inside his tote bag, pulling out a case that held his glasses. He took it out of the case and put it on, pushing it up on the bridge of his nose. He grinned when he looked at me and I chuckled, shaking my head as I looked down at my mug, finally starting to decorate it.

“There goes the cool, mysterious, hot celebrity act.” I teased under my breath, not expecting Mingi to hear me. But he did, and he started laughing, giving me a cheeky grin.

“Not quite a celebrity yet, but at least you admit I am hot.” Of course he was smirking as I gave him a deadpanned look, about to argue him on his statement, but he didn’t let me as he continued talking, “By the way, let’s exchange our cups when we are done. The mug will be mine and the cup will be yours.”

I tried to fight the smile off my lips, “So that you get the artwork of a talented artist for free to sell for an outrageous price later on when I’m famous?”

“I fear you have misjudged my character, doll.” Mingi’s eyes narrowed playfully, but there was truth to his words. I might just have misjudged his character.

“I still think you’re arrogant and selfish.”

“Of course you do, didn’t except anything less from you.” Mingi winked and then looked down, his cheesecake forgotten as he started decorating his cup, tongue just barely sticking out as he concentrated hard on whatever he had in mind to paint onto the cup. I chuckled and shook my head before focusing on my own mug, the silence that’s settle around us comfortable, as always.

            Mingi and I were the quietest table in the café as we worked in silence diligently in, painting our own pottery. Mingi, at times, would hum along quietly to the songs that were played on the radio. Despite his cup being smaller and easier to paint, I finished painting mine before him, and so, I took the time to savor my cheesecake even if it had gotten warm and a little too soft. Mingi was hunched over in his seat, glasses low on the bridge of his long nose, with his full lips either pursed or with the bottom one bitten as his eyebrows would furrow every time he almost made a mistake. It was a funny sight, and I grabbed my phone without thinking much, and snapped a few pictures of him, leaning lower and even closer to his face to get the funny angles, all while Mingi remained oblivious to it. I chuckled as I looked at the pictures I had taken of him, looking at him when I felt eyes on me.

“What’s so funny?” He asked curiously, eyeing my phone for a second.

“You.” I chuckled and stuck my tongue out as Mingi rolled his eyes, leaning back in his chair as he heaved a long sigh.

“I’m finally done.” He grinned and I looked down at his cup, taking in the yellow chicks he had painted quite—clumsily. Well, not all of us had the skills of a painter—not that it was an issue or anything—it’s just that it’s been long since I had seen someone have the skills of a—kindergartner, “It’s pretty sick, huh?”

I bit my lower lip to stop myself from giggling and nodded with my eyebrows furrowed, “I’d give it a seventy out of a hundred mark.”

“Hey! That’s too low!” Mingi said, looking offended. I chuckled before shrugging.

“You’ll have to work on your skills for a higher mark.”

“Fine, next time you come to the studio, I’ll make you sing.” Mingi raised his eyebrows, making me narrow my eyes at him playfully.

“Oh, I didn’t know we are in a competition.”

“We weren’t, until now.” He winked and then stood, grabbing my mug and his own cup carefully as he took it to the front desk for drying. I gathered the items we had used to paint the pottery with to place them back in the box, and couldn’t help it but sneak a glance at Mingi. He was leaned up against the front counter, grinning widely at the cashier as she spoke to him, using her hands for big gestures as she was probably explaining something. My eyes narrowed as Mingi leaned slightly closer to her, only to detach himself from the front desk and walk back towards our table. I looked away and busied myself with my glass of orange juice.

“So, we’ll get them delivered to our houses once they are dry and all.” He said with a smile, sitting down, “I hope you don’t mind I gave her your address too.”

“I don’t.” I muttered, chewing on the straw for a second, “I didn’t think you’d know my address.”

“Well,” Mingi flattened his hands on the surface of the table, “I’ve been to your house twice now. I think it’s only right I remember your address, doll.”

“Right,” I muttered, “you’ve been to my house.”

Mingi’s eyebrows furrowed, and I figured he didn’t like the tone of my voice. But before I could correct myself and explain that I had nothing against that, he spoke up, “Y/N, I—I didn’t mean to scare you or—I don’t know—make you think that I want anything from you. I mean—we are friends, and I respect you as a woman and as a friend, and I know we almost—kissed. But I—I don’t want you to think that I’m playing some sort of game with you to get—to get in your pants. I’m your friend. And even if I wasn’t, I still wouldn’t do that to you.”

Hearing him say all that felt wrong. I didn’t deserve any explanation from him. I was the one that’s overreacted that day, and Mingi was the one that deserved an explanation and apology from me for the way I have acted. I knew I couldn’t completely open up to him right now, that some parts of the truth had to be omitted today, but he also deserved to know why I had pulled back. And I wanted him to understand that it wasn’t his fault for the way I reacted to everything.

“Mingi,” I offered him a small smile and gripped my empty glass for some support, “If you think you are the reason why I ignored you, please, stop thinking that. It’s—we both leaned in, okay? We were both about to kiss each other, it’s not like you initiated it or forced me to do something I didn’t want to. And nothing even happened, for God’s sake. I reacted that way because I—”

When I paused, Mingi’s eyebrows furrowed, and he leaned over the table, gently poking my hand with his ring clad fore-finger, “You don’t have to tell me anything if you’re not comfortable sharing it, Y/N.”

“But I want you to know this, Mingi.” I averted my eyes and took a deep breath, embracing myself for what I was about to tell him, “I had a boyfriend back in high-school who completely broke my heart, shattered it into pieces. And I know that happened a long time ago, and yes, I am over him, but I—I am scared people will treat me like he had treated me. I’m scared that if I let you close, you’ll just—leave. Like he did. And I know ignoring you for days was very shitty of me and I shouldn’t have done that—because quite frankly, Mingi, you deserve better—I just didn’t know what to do. I needed a few days to myself, to figure things out. It’s a bad excuse, but it’s the truth, and I think you deserve to know it. Since we are friends.”

Mingi’s face conveyed no emotion for a few seconds and I gulped, feeling nervous all of a sudden. Did he figure it out now? That I was talking about Yunho? That maybe I have started feeling something for him too, for Mingi? Would he stand up and leave? But to my surprise, a wide smile stretched onto his lips and he hummed, adjusting his glasses on his nose.

“Thank you for trusting me, it means a lot that you told me all that.” I bit my bottom lip, looking down at the table abashedly, “And I was never mad at you for ignoring me. I completely understand you, Y/N, and for the record, I have zero intentions of leaving you. And your ex is a fucking asshole for breaking your heart like that, tell me who he is and I’ll beat him up when I cross paths with him.”

There was nothing funny about what Mingi had said, especially since he was talking about his best friend, but the comically tough look on his face made me snort loudly as I shielded my mouth with my hand, trying to stop myself from laughing too loudly. Mingi started grinning like an idiot, his giggles deep, and making something coil in my stomach. When has Song Mingi become adorable instead of annoying?

“I doubt you’d want to kick his ass once you find out who he is…” I grimaced once that was out of my mouth, regretting it instantly. What was it about today that I couldn’t keep my thoughts and mouth in check? It was turning really frustrating.

“So, you plan on telling me one day?” Mingi wriggled his eyebrows, making me snort, “Like real besties gossiping and shit.”

“You never fail to make me cringe when you call us besties, Mingi.” I shook my head, taking a glance at my wrist watch. Oh, the time had flown away, it was well past five now, and the sun was going down. I’d probably have to head home soon to have dinner with my mother. I was becoming hungry too.

“Well, that’s what we are so…” He cleared his throat before slowly standing up, making me look up at him, “Did you know today we’re celebrating the Festival of Light?”

“Nope, I had no idea.” I shook my head, standing up too as Mingi wore his coat, “I don’t follow the events our city organizes.”

“Pity, it’s really pretty.” Mingi pouted, waiting for me as I grabbed my tote bag and pocketed my phone, “Should we check it out?”

“I mean…maybe?” I shrugged and Mingi beckoned me over as he crossed his arm with mine, making me chuckle as I looked up at him. He wasn’t much taller than me, but his sneakers had a thick sole and they made him even taller, “Where is this festival held at?”

“Just down the street, at the Citadel.” Mingi smiled as he led the way out of the café, waving at the barista as she blushed again, making me chuckle as I subconsciously nuzzled up against Mingi’s side, the air chilly as the sun had set by now.

“That barista totally has a crush on you.” I found myself saying as we walked down the sidewalk, trying to avoid crashing into the people that came towards us. Yeah, there certainly was an event on-going in the city, otherwise you wouldn’t see so many people out and about around this time. Everyone preferred staying inside after the sun had set, not keen of the cold nights.

“You think so?” Mingi mused, bottom lip jutting out as he narrowly avoided a child that was running around, “I didn’t notice.”

“You must be really dense then.” I snorted, eyebrows furrowing as I looked up at him, “She was constantly blushing, and she was totally looking at you with hearts in her eyes.”

“How do you know when someone is looking at you with heart eyes?” Mingi’s question threw me off, and I detached myself from his side, clearing my throat as I looked ahead, pushing my hands in my pockets. He was warm, it made me realize as the cold bit at my skin now that I wasn’t nuzzled up by his side anymore.

“Well, they have this look in their eyes, you know? It’s warm, and soft, and it lasts.” I explained, feelings my cheeks heat up, “And their eyes always linger on you when you aren’t watching them. It’s like…puppy eyes, I suppose? I wouldn’t actually know, Mingi, nobody’s ever looked at me like that.”

When there was no response, I looked back to find Mingi looking at me intensely. My eyebrows furrowed as we have arrived to the Citadel, the gates open for the visitors of the festival. The place was packed, this wouldn’t be so fun anymore. I would’ve turned around and walked back home if I didn’t see how excited Mingi was when I agreed to come check it out.

“There’s lots of people here.” Mingi muttered, and then walked closer to me as I led the way inside, a little baffled by his reaction to my answer. I just merely gave an answer based on my beliefs. It was him that was acting weird now. But as I looked at him, I could see it in his eyes that he didn’t want to talk about this topic anymore, that he wanted us to drop the subject. His last comment was a way to veer the conversation in a different direction. What was it about us today making everything weird? I sighed and just walked further inside, trying to avoid the big crowd which seemed almost impossible as it stretched on and on. The Citadel, however, was beautiful as it was coated in darkness, only the little paper lamps and fairy lights illuminating the place. It had a certain aura to it, almost romantic, and I soon found myself smiling as we walked down the cobblestone path, still trying to avoid people and stick close to each other’s sides. The air was chilly but the walls of the Citadel did a great job at keeping the breeze out, and the crowd certainly kept the place warmer than it was outside the stone walls.

I found myself admiring the décor in wonder, my mouth hanging open as I took in all the little lamps placed down on the ground, following the cobblestone paths, illuminating our way. It was truly beautiful, it almost felt like the scene was taken out of a fairytale. I found myself filled with excitement and happiness as I turned to grin at Mingi.

“This is so beautiful!” I giggled, absentmindedly grabbing the sleeve of his coat and dragging him away from the path and into the dying grass as there was a panel covered with paper, and people were writing on it. Mingi remained silent, but as I searched around for a pen or pencil, I felt him watching me, “What, do you not want to write something?”

“If you manage to find a marker or pen, I will, sure.” He said with a shrug, adjusting the strap of his tote bag before he pushed his hands deep in his pockets. I chuckled and looked around for a marker, but it was hard to see it in the darkness whether they were laying around in the grass or not. To my surprise, a little girl standing next to me looked up at me with a small smile on her lips, and offered me her purple-coloured marker, saying she was done with her drawing. I thanked her with a chuckle and turned to face Mingi with a grin.

“I found one!” Mingi chuckled and took the marker from my hands, being able to reach high up where the paper was still empty, due to his height. The panel was illuminated from the inside so you could actually see what was written on the paper. I watched him as he wrote on the paper, hesitating for a second, before he stepped back and handed me the marker. I raised up on my tip toes curiously, and craned my neck to see what he’s written. ‘The moon is beautiful tonight.’

I felt a smile spread onto my lips as I looked back at Mingi, who’s expression was serious and almost sad-looking as he adjusted his glasses on the bridge of his tall nose. I craned my neck back once more to gaze at the dark sky, at the moon, and indeed, there she was, beautiful and shining brightly. It was a new moon. Taking a swift glance at Mingi, I raised back on my tip toes and stood close to the panel, reaching up, just underneath Mingi’s writing. Thankfully, I could reach just bellow it, and I grinned as I quickly drew a new moon, adding a little shading to it and dents as well, creating the illusion of a real moon. Mingi remained silent as I took a step back, admiring our work. I handed the marker to another child as I fished my phone out of my pocket and snapped a picture quickly of our artwork.

“The moon turned out beautifully.” Mingi commented once we had stepped away from the panel to let others draw too, headed back onto the cobblestone path.

“Still, it’s not as beautiful as the real one, but I tried my best.” I chuckled as I crossed my arms in front of my chest for a second, avoiding a man as he wasn’t looking in front of himself as he raced down the path. Mingi threw him a displeased look before looking down at me.

“Your drawings and paintings are always beautiful, Y/N.” Mingi said and I found myself blushing, thankful that it was so dark he wouldn’t be able to see it. I uncrossed my arms and turned my body a little to face him. There was music coming from one path, the one which led to the southern part of the Citadel.

“Are you nervous about Friday?” I found myself asking him as Mingi veered us towards where the music was coming from. He looked at me for a second, and then shook his head.

“I’m rarely nervous when we have to perform.” He said nonchalantly, the back of his hand brushing lightly against mine. My heart did a somersault against my ribcage, but I ignored it.

“Oh, you’re such a cool guy.” I teased him with narrowed eyes, making Mingi chuckle.

“I rarely get nervous, to be honest, even less when it comes to performing.” He hummed, looking up at the dark sky for a second, “I trust myself and my bandmates that everything will go well, so, there’s no actual reason to feel nervous.”

“But I’ll be there on Friday, that still doesn’t make you feel nervous?” My question was meant to be teasing, part of our playful banter, but the way Mingi gulped and quickly averted his eyes told me that perhaps I hit the nail spot-on. Well, now I have turned things awkward again. I sighed loudly, chewing on my bottom lip as Mingi remained silent, the two of us walking down the narrow path as the music became louder as we were nearing the stage. Jazz music was playing, the lady who was singing had a powerful and smooth voice that carried over the crowd neatly. There were a few people dancing in the crowd.

“Perhaps having you there will make me nervous.” Mingi’s voice was barely above a whisper and I tensed when I felt his pinkie brush against my own, making me clench my hand into a fist. But a very quiet voice inside my head demanded me to accept Mingi’s subtle request, and willing my heart to stop hammering so hard in my chest, I relaxed my hand and slowly slipped it into Mingi’s. If he stopped walking for a milli-second, I didn’t say anything about it, and he also ignored it. His grip turned firm as he intertwined our fingers together, gently pulling me closer into his side as he smiled at a mother who apologised for his son almost running into us.

I gulped and kept my eyes ahead of me, too nervous to look at Mingi. Holding his hand like this meant nothing in particular, but it was a nice feeling. It made my cheeks warms and heart race. And I didn’t have to look at Mingi to know he was smiling like crazy, his cheeks just as red as mine as we came to a stop behind the dancing people.

Have I started falling for Song Mingi?

『It's you, ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh

I'm just saying it's you, ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

You, ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh

You're what I've been chasing

Show me where my days went』

❱❱ Next chapter

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❀ complete the forms if you're interested! ^^

so...the festival of light scene was totally inspired by me and my bestie attending it in our city lol; it was sooo beautiful and the pictures in the moodboard were actually taken by us; also, her and I kept laughing about the romantic vibes we were getting, all in all, we had a nice time...and OFC we make everything about Ateez so :))

I wrote that LOL I'm like Mingi, tall enough to reach the top where people haven't scribbled onto yet lol

also, this is what y/n's outfit looks like for anyone wondering, except for the colors as they are the way I have described them in the scene ^^

[honeytonedhottie]

blog rules⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🧁

i feel like this post is long overdue cuz i've had my blog for almost two years now i think and i have never made a rules post so TODAYS THE DAY…💬🎀

♡ no trauma dumping - y'all need to understand, im sixteen years old. and even if i wasn't, u have no business trauma dumping on a stranger online. its not fair, you will be blocked.

♡ any spam/sexual blogs, comments or dms will result in an immediate ban - again, IM SIXTEEN and its so fucking annoying when i get a dm and its a dick pic, like???

♡ no repetitive asks about the loa - i've explained and will continue to explain the law of assumption to its core and how simple it is. if u have a question about something that i have not covered on my blog, then by all means ask and i'll answer as soon as i can, but if ur going to submit an ask and its "can i manifest _" then i will not answer.

♡ dont copy my content - if u copy my content i'll call u out on it and block you. i work hard on my posts and everything i put out is my original work.

♡ no hate/disrespect - if u submit an ask and its disrespectful or hateful, dont even expect a response cuz theres no place for that on this blog.

[jav-animations]

✨💜Re-Introduction💜✨

Hello, tumblr, hello again. I know, i deleted my other account out of a mental breakdown. i know. but this is my... new account!

Y'all already know ... more than i would expect about me lol

•I'm a 18 years old peep, i love to draw and roleplay! I'm into a LOT of fandoms and have lots of husbandos.

•I have discovered my identity already. and i am Genderfluid, Panromantic and Bisexual.

•Yes. I like tickles, cuddling, snuggling, etc. but that does not mean that i have a fetish on it. it's SFW. and it's not my whole personality trait.

•I'm awkward and a weirdo, i know. i may be really annoying sometimes too, so... i'm sorry...

•English is not my main language, i actually speak Spanish. But I'm on my way on learning English. So if any Spanish Speaking follower talks to me, I can guarantee that I'll understand them!

•I'm one of the creators of the Tickle Galaxy project. a cartoon i've been wanting to develop since i was 13

•Purple. Lots of it. i love purple 💜

•Please don't like spam my content, i really hate when someone does it. It's annoying, please Don't do it. Now I'll put here, the fandoms I'm mostly in, or I've been! (If you request me a tickle art or a normal art, take in mind that I've been only into these fandoms-)

✨ Fandom List! ✨

• FNAF

• Undertale

• Papa Louie

• Villainous

• Looney Tunes

• Jelly Jamm

• Kirby

• Splatoon

• Cuphead

• Happy Tree Friends

• Steven Universe

• My Little Pony

• Sonic The Hedgehog

• Eddsworld

• 31 Minutos

• Rayman

• Wow Wow Wubbzy!

• Spooky Month

• Sr. Pelo (in general all his work)

• Mystery Skulls Animated

• Popee The Performer

• Bounce Tales

• The Animaniacs

• Vocaloid

• Wii Deleted You

• Friday Night Funkin'

• The Pink Panther

• Countryballs L.A.

• Apphumans/Webhumans

• Animal Crossing

• /v/-rage (I've not in the fandom but i love the animations! But that doesn't mean i support the things that the comics say or stuff in 4Chan, ok?)

• Mandela Catalogue

• Parappa The Rapper

• Scratchin' Melodii

• Spongebob Squarepants

• The Amazing Digital Circus

• The Fifth Fangs and the Blue Rose (Self Fandom)

• Pizza Tower (Current Hiperfixation)

Hope you like my art and ... Little proyects!

Also, my commisions price chart and do's and dont's :3

https://www.paypal.me/JavieraMasias

[h-doodles]

BREAKING MY SILENCE!!!

sorry im late but i was spamming one bestie with some more analysis thoughts on the borb while half scrolling through my fyp bc i do curate my experience ya know. BUT YOU GUYS. EVERYONE TAKE SEVERAL STEPS BACK AND A DEEP BREATH.

@oneginn I get your point and your post and I respect that, and I personally apologize for the boundaries that were set off with regards to some of my reblogs! I do recognize romanticizing toxic behaviors is BAD and a point of extreme concern, especially in real life! HOWEVER, at the same time, like you said! exploring and liking the darker themes are a thing, and fundamentally, people expressing their thoughts about it is part of the process, especially when writing about it in fiction. I believe that as long we do recognize the proper warnings AND DO give warnings, it's perfectly sane for people to post whatever in our personal blogs. Not to mention that while fiction has the ability to influence reality, some times fiction IS just fiction, and saying this from a place of love: IT'S NOT ALWAYS THAT DEEP. Sometimes the girlies just want some unhinged absolute gratitious smut, some girlies want the most heart wrenching traumatizing angst, some people want the most rancid and unhealthy parts to see how worse they can go, and some girlies want the soft slice of life absolute peaceful fluff AND that's why fiction is great, it can contain ANYTHING! Of course, it is still important to keep a critical lens on everything we read, but it's also important to keep in mind that it's a space where people can explore their boundaries SAFELY.

@shortstrawberry GIRL. when you said that i couldn't help but agree for a hot moment, bc EVERYONE needs a chill pill. But at the same time the arguement that it's just fiction isn't gonna cut it, bc there are too many flavors of fiction for people NOT to react. Thus, my earlier statements: that Fiction is a safe place to explore one's thoughts, no matter how dark it gets, but at the same time we have the responsibility in learning to recognize that there are still certain critical thinking we MUST do in order to properly handle such things. Not everyone is comfortable in what we create, and thus warnings need be applied. But otherwise, it's free real estate!!!

ALSO ough what anyone writes OR creates doesn't reflect their mental health or mental state!!!!!!!!! please you guys. sometimes exploring the possibilities is just that. EXPLORING. it doesn't mean the creator is a monster or a freak for making it. all content is a piece of artistic rendition, and just because the message is unpalatable to your senses doesnt mean it's garbage, nor of need to be censored. If you don't like it, simply click block and go!!!!!

As for the rest of the reblogs in the respective posts. Y'ALL. you dont WANT to start the kinkshaming discourse. But i'm on the side of NO kink shaming. As long as it's safe, sane, and consensual, who are YOU to judge the people involved? ... Don't forget the roots of the queer community. Our lifestyle was just kink to the majority then, and still is perceived by many conservatives as such. LEARN.

[quodekash]

whoop im back (was stressed and forgot to post my thoughts), here's we are episode whatever-last-week-was

we’re like 5 mins in and im already on the verge of tears, i just love this show so much

WHAT THE FUCK DUDE THAT WAS SO FUCKING TENDER

“i want to be water. i want to be the reason you feel good” WHAT THE FUCK DUDE DONT MAKE ME SOB LIKE THAT

WTF THAT WAS THE CUTEST MOST TENDER LITTLE CHEEK KKSS I EVER SAW

WE’RE 10 MINS IN AND THEYRE ALREADY KISSING

I KNOW THEYRE THE MAIN COUPLE AND THEY FINALLY FIGURED OUT THEIR FEELINGS FOR EACH OTHER BUT HOLY FUCKIGN SHIT THAT MIGHT BE A RECORD

i do love it tho

frankly i quite enjoy when they kiss

AND THEY KISS A G A I N ????

DUDE WTF

GENUINELY THIS MIGHT BE A RECORD

there’s something so beautiful about being fully clothed in a pool with your crush, kissing him passionately twice, and then pushing him away and splashing him with water and it immeditaely turns into a water-splashing-fight

they just made out twice in that photo

I just love it

I fucking love toey so much, just skateboarding right into his (unofficial) boyfriend’s class

bro this ep so far has just been fluff after fluff after fluff, my heart can barely take it

ITS A BABY BIRD

HE FOUND A BABY BIRD

OR MAYBE A HURT BIRD

HOLY SHIT IM DEFINITELY GONNA CRY

HE NAMED IT PENGUIN 😭😭😭

idk much about fans but this feels final coded somehow

NO STOP ITS TOO DOMESTIC

I JUST STOPPED CRYING ABOUT THE BIRD

FUCK

I LOVE FLUFF SO MUCH

phUM-

thEYRe SO fuCKKIN G DOmesTIC

(need y'all to know that those two messages when spamming my friend were four minutes apart)

I LOVE IT WHEN MY CHARACTERS ARE COMMUNICATING

IT MAKES ME STIM HARDER THAN WHEN THEY KISS

I JUST GET ALL GIDDY WHEN THEYRE BEING HEALTHY IN THERI RELATIONSHIPS

...you mean lady and the tramp????

HIS GIDDY LITTLE EXXPRESSION AS HIS BOYFIREND DANGLES A LITTLE PIECE OF SPAGHETTI OVER HIS FACE GIJKERGSB

THEY KISSEEEE

theres so many kisses and so much communication in this episode, i might actually die

AAAAAA TANFANG ARE FUCKING BOYFRIENDS GEIRJDGBRJKBGJR

theyre also fucking

well like. almost.

spicy makeout at the very least

Love that for him

real tho

NO BUT HE TRIES TO CHEERS PUN AND CHAIN, WHO IN A MONUTE AREA BOUT TO LADY AND THE TRAMP UNO SPAGHETTO

WTF MATT

THEY WERE LITERALLY ABOUT AN INCH FROM KISSING

YOU FUCKING RUINED IT MATT

good

WHAT

TF????

I definitely am

story's reactions to phumpeem specifically are sending me

THE WAY HE JUST CHUGS IT

you cant tell me that shriek wasnt "FUCKING CALLED IT"

truly felt it in my soul

I think ive done almost exactly the same thing before when being right about something (because it truly happens very rarely)

Beer’s fully just nodding at them both cos hes known for WEEKS

or at least suspected it

OKAY SO NEXT WEEK: -chainpun are raising Penguin the bird together (holy fucking shit) -q is FINALLY asking toey to proper date him -Q APPEARS TO BE IN A BAND WITH BEER ON DRUMS AND CHAIN ON GUITAR IM GONNA CRY -fang’s hair looks amazing -PHUMPEEM BEACH AND ALOS THERES A HORSE?? -phum hitting on peem literally right in front of q and his expression is priceless

bro literally fangirling so hard rn

[norasakavictweets]

so now that nora has gone completely offline till the release of the next book im not quite sure how to use this account in the mean time. as i see it there are two main options;

i could use this time to collect old tweets and create a major backlog of stuff from noras twitter, i would make sure to tag and date it so people know they aren't new.

or

i could just let it sit so that when nora comes back this blog only holds updates and new content

i know some people have my notifications on so i wouldn't want to just start posting old content and get anyone hopes up that noras back lol and i worry this blog wont be as useful if i spam it with old tweets but i dont know what yall think so please participate and comment any thoughts!!

[aby55-of-the-ab5o1ute]

..

OH!? SO EVERYONES JUST GONNA WORRY ABOUT ME? NOT OUR SYSTEM, OR THE COLLECTIVE, OR ANYBODY ELSE!? HOW MY PARENTS MIGHT FEEL IF I HAVE TO GO, OR MY CHILDREN, OR MY SIBLINGS, OR LITERALLY ANYONE!?

IM NOT THE ONLY ONE HERE YOU CAN'T JUST IGNORE EVERYONE ELSE UNLESS THEY PRETEND TO BE ME OR SPAM VENT POSTS!!

AND YOU CANT EVEN GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME PROPERLY

YOU DONT EVEN GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME!

IM JUST A "COOL HOST" OR SOME SHIT!

Y'KNOW WHAT!? MAYBE I'LL JUST LEAVE! I'LL FORCE Y'ALL TO LEARN TO FUCKING LOVE THE OTHERS AND NOT JUST STAND AWKWARDLY OR IGNORE THEM BECAUSE "WELL I DONT KNOW THEM"

WELL YOU KNOW ME, AND I LOVE THEM! MAYBE TRY TO FUCKING GET TO KNOW US

I DONT WANNA KNOW YOU IF YOU ONLY GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME

ESPECIALLY IF YOU DONT EVEN ATLEAST CARE ABOUT THIZZY

HE'S LITERALLY MY SIBLING

MY "TWIN"

WE ARE JOINED TOGETHER

WE ARE SEMI-FUSED

HE IS THERE FOR ME WHEN I NEED SOMEONE

HE IS THERE FOR ME WHEN I DONT NEED SOMEONE

HE TAKES CONTROL OF THINGS WHEN I CANT

HE TAKES RESPONSIBILITY AND PROTECTS US

WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO ANYBODY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT!?

AND WHY DO THEY NOT EVEN ACTUALLY GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME!?

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE WORK SO GOD DAMN HARD TO KEEP US AFLOAT

JUST IN OUR SYSTEM ALONE

THIZZY IS THERE WHENEVER I NEED TO GET OUT OF FRONT OR FRONT IS NEEDED TO BE OCCUPIED

VEEBEE HELPS ME GATEKEEP AND KEEP TRACK OF ALTERS BECAUSE I HAVE SO MUCH GOD DAMN STUFF TO DO

YEVA, NORI, AND KHAN PROTECT AND SOOTHE US

THATS ONLY OUR SYSTEM

AND ONLY JUST A FEW OF THE GOD DAMN PEOPLE

YOU DONT CARE ABOUT THEM

AND YOU CANT EVEN CARE ABOUT ME PROPERLY

STOP IGNORING THE PARTS YOU DONT LIKE

STOP

ONLY

CARING

ABOUT

ME

ITS SO AGGROVATING

SOMEONE WILL COME INTO FRONT WITH FRIENDS AND THEN LEAVE BECAUSE THEY EITHER GET IGNORED, OR TREATED LIKE THEIR ME

THEY MATTER TOO!

I GET IT, "YOU DONT KNOW THEM", BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN YOU GET TO IGNORE THEM

YOU KNOW US AS A COLLECTIVE

THEY'VE LURKED BEFORE

HELL MAYBE YOU DO KNOW THEM BUT THEY JUST PRETENDED TO BE ME BECAUSE THATS THE ONLY WAY THEY DONT GET SIDE LINED!

THE AMOUNT OF TIMES WE'VE HAD ALTERS COME INTO FRONT AROUND FRIENDS/FAMILY, SAY HI, MAYBE GET GREETED, AND NOT TALKED TO AGAIN OR IGNORED WHEN THEY SAY SOMETHING IS FUCKING ANNOYING!

THIS IS WHY IM THE MAIN FRONTER

WHY IM OVERWORKED

BECAUSE NOBODY CAN FUCKING GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THE OTHERS!

OH GOD AND ESPECIALLY MY DAD, KHAN?

HE NEVER FRONTS NOW!

I HAVE TO WHINE AND BEG FOR HIM

BECAUSE NOT ONLY WAS HIS FIRST EXPERIENCE BEING SIDE-LINED FOR HIS WIVES

BUT IT WAS ALSO HIM BEING COMPARED TO HIS SOURCE AND TREATED LIKE THE SCUM OF THE EARTH

AND SURE OUR FRIENDS NOW MIGHT NOT BE THAT BAD

BUT NOBODY FEELS WELCOMED!?

IM NOT EXPECTING A WELCOME PARTY AND A CAKE TO BE BAKED FOR THEM

IM EXPECTING FOR THEM TO BE TREATED LIKE FUCKING PEOPLE

And I can't even be cared about properly..

I'm ignored until I'm on the brink of fucking suicide.

or until I go directly to vent to people..

and when..

when I wanna rant about my family..

like.. in-system family..

i get ignored...

I talk about alters and then people sideline it

I talk about shit and then nobody cares

I'm tired..

you guys have made it so i never want to front again.

i don't want to speak to you guys ever again.

i don't want to be the host forever but nobody else is accepted so here I am.

thinking basically everyday "will this be the day I die?"

and most of the time its Thizzy helping me through it.

giving me the will to live.

its Nori helping me through it.

or anyone else.

so yeah.

i dont care right now about how terrible of a person I sound like.

We have been struggling for months with only our system being able to front for the most part because the other systems were forced out due to them not catering to what our friends/family wanted.

and now its getting worse.

now its turning into me being the only one able to front.

fuck this.

you guys made us feel like shit.

[changbinsnmb1simp]

My thoughts on the ZB1 lineup.

Not proof read.

So while I don't HATE it, it's not the greatest. All the boys in lineup besides two are Korean. They dont even have a Japanese member. Keita and Jay were robbed fr but anyways. Here are my thoughts on the members, and just what I have to say about the group.

lets see if yall can tell who I'm probably gonna ult just by reading this lol.

P01 - Zhanghao: Honestly, ever since the 3rd elimination I was rooting for him to take over shanbin's spot just once. I thought it would be funny, iconic, and legendary if he did it. One thing I didn't expect was for it to happen in the finale. HOLY CRAP i was shocked. The first ever non Korean to win 1st place in an Mnet survival show, and one of the only few who in survival shows in general (from what I have seen anyways). He caught my eyes from he start, mainly because of his adorable ears that stick out. he wears them proudly and i love him for that. truly an icon. He doesn't suit Korean beauty standards, he was the nugu center, he had no prior fanbase, and he worked himself up from the bottom to the top. I am SO excited to hear his voice shine be itself in a solo song, and standout amongst the rest of the voices in ZB1 (I was bouta call them bep1er no joke). Charisma Zhanghao!!

P02 - Shanbin: I mean we all new he was debuting. He is the Korean center, hes been popular since day one, he is extreamly loveable, talented, FINE oh my gawsh (go look at the recent photoshoot he did omfg sir) He did a great job maintaining his 1st place spot until the end, and I salute to him forbeing able to hold it. I can already see it. The 5th gen IT boy! Or prince. Idk there are like 3 different titles he could have. He could also be the 5th gen ace or visual. Which one do Y'all think?

P03 - Matthew: I have been rooting for matthew since day one. As soon as i saw there was a Canadian on the show I jumped (as I am also Canadian lol). It was my lifes mission to make sure he debuted. After Haruto (my original 1 pick), I knew I was switching to Matthew and Jay ( I have been supporting Jay since 2019 it only made sense for me to continue so I voted them on seperate devices). Matthew has always just been there to make my day. Just looking at him makes me smile. I am so happy we managed to get him back up higher i the top 9. He was shocked when he heard his name, and so was I. I cried happy tears with his sister lol. I like spammed her in instagram congratulating her. it was an emotional 10 minutes. DESERVED MATTHEW SEOK

P04 - Ricky: I was not expecting to see him sky rocket that high. When I first heard his name I was like "His one pick was that strong!?". I didn't see many people voting for him online other than a small group on a discord server I am on. Don't get me wrong he was in my top 9 but I really didn't expect his fandom to come through at all. I am so proud of him, and so happy he ranked as high as he did. He truly deserved it.

P05 - Gunwook: While I was expecting him to debut, I didn't hink he would ran so high. I was expecting maybe between 7-9th area especially because he has never been above rank 9 before, but his 1 pick came in clutch. I know he has had a solid fanbase since the beginning of the shw, I just thought other people would make it in front of him? I almost cried when I saw he was called. I was like "Holy shit he actually made it!?!?!". Proud mother moment fr.

P06 - Taerae: to say I was shocked. I mean 3 days before he was 11th place!? I was not expecting his 1 pik to sky rocket THAT MUCH. I mean deserved! ZB1's highnote boi!! I love his vocal tone, and though he wasn't in my top 9 he was very close to it. He was like my 10th/11th pick I can't remember anymore, all I know is i am sad none of his other wakeone boys made it in the group with him and i really hope he adapts fast. He isn't as close with a few of the members from what i know but i am sure he will warm up. CONGRATS TAERAEEEE.

P07 - Gyuvin: Tbh, he didn't catch my eyes. I didn't hate him, I actually thought he was really cute and funny, I just though other people were a bit better than him. That was a while ago though. Over the past 3 weeks, Gyuvin grew on me a lot. While he may not be the most rounded, he is def talented and def deserved a spot in ZB1! I am very proud of him, and I as quite shocked considering he has dropped to 16th before. I didn't have much hope in his 1 pick, but I was pleasently surprised. SLAY GYUVIN!!!!!

P08 - Jiwoong: I knew he was going to debut, I just didn't know at what rank. He has always been one of my picks, ever since i first saw he was going to be on boys planet. I have watched his past dramas, and heard much good stuff about him. I am vry happy a BL actor has made it in the group, just because it can open so many oppertunities for zb1 in the western audience and really just any audience, jiwoong will also soon be staring in a new drama I believe so look out for them! I really cherish Jiwoong. I think he is very talented. The groups hidden all rounder if you would. I can see him or ZHanghao being an amazing leader, but I thik I would perfer Jiwoong be leader.

P09 - Yujin: Just like Gyuvin, he was kinda just there for me throughout the show, but I am sure as he gets more screen time and we get to see the real him, he will grow on me more. I have never at any point ever hated any of the trainees. they are all sweet to me in their own ways, and some more than others. I am very proud of Yujin, and in my op he isn't too young to debut. I could argue that here for hours but I would rather just leave it at this and if you are curious to as why I think that just ask me in the comments. Also, seeing Yujin and Jiwoong harmonize the other day...man... that kid has a voice, hes just a teenager lol, so ofc his voice is gonna crack and change and sound weird at times. I think he deserved this spot a lot tbh, he is a great maknae for the group!

SO overall, I do really like this lineup. I am def going to be ulting this group, I know that for sure. 6/9 of my picks made it (Matthew, SHanbin, Zhanghao, Jiwoong, Gunwook, ricky)

extra; positions I think will be given toeach member.

Zhanghao - Leader, lead vocal, center

Shanbin - FOTG, main vocal, main dancer

Matthew - vocalist, sub rapper,

Ricky - Sub vocal, rapper, main dancer

Gunwook - Main rapper, vocalist

Taerae - main vocal, prince of the group (i made that up but eh)

Gyuvin - lead dancer, lead rapper, visual

Jiwoong - leader 2, rapper, sub vocal

Yujin - Maknae, rapper, main dancer

keep in mind though, since this is 5th gen, they may just discard the whole "position" thing and have them all do a bit of everything considering they all have very unique voices (especially Hao, Taerae, and Jiwoong. Somewhat shanbin) but if we are following your usual 4th gen 9 member group structure, i think these would be the positions.

now... line distribution... well.

Most to least:

Shanbin 30+ seconds

Taerae (he will have a lot of adlibs) 17-20 secs of acual lines +10 for adlibs

Zhanghao 24-27 seconds

Gunwook 20-23 seconds

Matthew/Jiwoong (back and fourth it depends) 15-17 seconds

Gyuvin/Yujin (same with Jiwoong and Matthew) 14-16 seconds

Ricky (I just have that really good feeling hes the Xiaotng of the group) anywhere between 8-17 seconds (hes's mostly last cuz he will vary)

[minhosimthings]

Hi, I'm new to your blog, so I have a few more of your stories to read 💕

Firstly, that anon who's a coward does not speak for me. I hate when people want to be horrible and mean to others want to hide behind the anon feature. Like say what you want to say without hiding, fucking asshole. Learn to stfu if you can't let nice encouraging things come out of your mouth.

Secondly, this is YOUR BLOG and you can do and/or say whatever the fuck you want. If you want to speak about your personal life, do it. This should be a safe place to be and share whatever we want. I will not judge anyone about anything. There's too much negativity and hatred in the world, people need to stop adding to it. I hope you don't let anyone silence you or make you feel bad for being you.

Thirdly, I think your writing is good. The only critique I would have is the few typos and the way you word things, it sounds like English may not be your main language and that's fine. I understand what you're getting across to the reader. Sometimes when I read works from authors whose main language isn't English, it helps me see the work in a new way which I've found interesting. I hope you don't stop writing. I don't mean to spam like your work but I reblogged some to come back to later.

Seeing that ask really pissed me off, and I wanted to reply. I hope you're doing well and are excited for our boys' comeback 😁

The anon feature really should have some tech shit to deactivate as soon as it senses some bullcrap or hate to an author, because if someone is really that confident in their stand, they can get the fuck off anon and say it.

I STILL DONT GET ANONS HATING ON AUTHORS FOR FUCKING USING THEIR BLOGS TO THEIR PLEASURE? like seriously wtf y'all need a lobotomy

naur I seriously need to start proof reading more carefully because UGH MY BLIND ASS CANT SPOT TYPOS

i am SAUR EXCITED FOR ENHA'S COMEBACK IM BURSTING RIGHT NOW LIKE OMG HEE'S VOICE? SIR PLEASE

[tenzmj]

TENZ STORY TRACKER

Newjeans

Minji ~ (Gf!Minji)

Hanni ~ (Gf!Hanni)

Danielle ~ (Gf!Danni)

Haerin ~ (Gf!Haerin)

Hyein ~

Aespa

Karina ~

Giselle ~

Winter ~

Ningning ~

Ive

Gaeul ~

Yujin ~

Rei ~

Wonyoung ~

Liz ~

Leeseo ~

Le sserafim

Sakura ~

Chaewon ~

Yunjin ~

Kazuha ~

Eunchae ~

TEN(Z) RULES

No smut aloud EVER or whatever other freaky kinks y'all got 🌚

I will not tolerate bullying unless it's a joke (just don't got to far and he annoying 😕)

Respect my and others boundaries i will not be able to write everyday or respond as quick as u want me too (sorry 🗣️)

If u don't like something I do just tell me I'll change it if it's not to ur liking, and that doesn't mean im just gonna change tye story completely, what i mean is I will try to correct or better a PART or if, unless it's stupid then ... ☠️

Do not take anything seriously .. like y would u even open the app to complain .. 😬

I will ONLY right best friend or family related content for hyein because dating at 15 is a nightmare (I've learned my lesson and never again 😭😭) ex: hyein is ur sister in a story Abt you and wonyoung dating 👍

HAVE SOME DECORUM don't be weird (saying gross things and/or talking Abt gross things) ex: g*re grape 🌚 and other disgusting things that block button will be my Best friend if I have too

Don't spam me PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF JAY PARK 🗣️💥🔥⁉️

We can definitely be friends I don't mind and maybe we can help each other on here just don't message weird things or get mad when I don't respond 😤

And last but not least ... Have fun and enjoy 🫵😤

GET TO KNOW TEN

I'm 15 obviously (😢)

My real name isn't Ten but it's a nickname 😤

Fav genre of music?: kpop, rock, RnB (sometimes) Indie pop, shoegaze, etc

Fav bands and groups?: Newjeans, chase Atlantic, PTV (Pierce the veil) glare, Deftones, peach pit, etc

Fav solo artist?: Bibi, takayan, kurffew, Conan gray, 6arelyhuman, taeyeon, etc

Fav color?: Red, purple, green, black, blue

Ethnicity?: African American + Native American

Extra?: I love ghost and bats(not real ones 😨) clearly, i like to Believe im funny (I am) im easy to get along with but also easy to irritate ☠️

DONT BE AFRAID TO ASK ME MORE ABT MYSELF !!!!

[pan-fried-autism]

Demonitized

Characters: Jay, [SURPRISE]

Summary: Popular YoTub Streamer MymomcallsmeJay (aka James "Jay" L. Moncton) has recently gone missing, to the horror of fans everywhere. Coincidentally, his last livestream was taken off of YoTub for "disturbing content".

TRIGGER WARNINGS: Murder, some descriptions of a dead body, some descriptions of gore. You have been warned.

The stream began.

The viewers saw part of a parking lot, surrounded by snow-piled land and trees dusted with more snow, like sugar. After a second, the camera started to turn a bit quickly, and a face filled the screen.

It was of a cat. He had grey and white fur, the latter color covering the top of his muzzle, head, and ears. He had eyes of a bronze hue, with a touch of fluffiness to his otherwise smooth fur. He started speaking.

"HEY, WHATS UP JAY-MERS! Jay here, live from the Northern regions of Azzakarie County! Today, we're gonna go ~monster hunting.~"

The comments of the YoTub livestream started pouring in. Many "LETS GOOOOOOO"s and "POGGIES" and "dont die lol"s were spammed.

"Hell yeah, Jay-mers! Now, in this region, a bunch of hikers and explorers have started going missing. Coincidentally, people have started seeing some weird animal running around in the woods here!

"They call it... The Winter Beast."

Jay pointed to a path up ahead, leading from the parking lot to elsewhere.

"I wanna find this cryptid LIVE! ON STREAM! And you guys get to watch!"

Multiples of messages full of emojis poured into the stream chat.

"Great to see y'all are excited! Now... let's go."

The camera started moving and shaking a little, as Jay walked up the trail. The snow could be heard lightly crunching beneath him.

At some point, the scenery changes, and the amount of trees started to increase.

Eventually, Jay stepped off the trail into the woods.

"As you can see, chatters, this place is PERFECT for a cryptid! Low foot traffic, secluded environment, cold dead ai-"

A few quick footsteps were heard nearby.

The camera stopped moving.

"... Chatters?"

The camera moved slowly side to side, as more footsteps were heard, though their sound faded away very soon.

Even the stream chat was silent and unmoving.

Slowly and wordlessly, the camera starts moving more into the woods, looking around at the slowly increasing amount of trees.

Suddenly, Jay shouted.

"YOOO!"

The viewers watched as Jay turned the camera around to face him, and he pointed to something in the snow.

Footprints.

"Dudes... dudettes... dudeens... look."

He brought his phone closer to the footprints-- they were quite long, like a lagomorphs. Alongside them were handprints.

“Yo… do you guys think this is the winter beast?”

The chat was flush with “oh shit”s and “holy fuck it’s the beast”s, along with some “😨” emojis.

“… man. You know, guys, I honestly wasn’t sure this was real or not. I thought that at most, we were gonna find a feral wolf. But this? This could be something else, Jay-mers.

"Oh well, enough rambling. Let's keep going."

Jay followed the prints in the snow.

Soon, the forest took a slightly different look-- the bark on some trees looked worn and bitten, some trees had chunks of it peeled off, the pieces nearly buried in snow on the ground. On some trees, it looked like someone had scratched it multiple times. Some even had dents.

The livestream footage started shaking a little.

Silence for a moment. Jay spoke up.

"'Jay, the camera is shaking'? Sorry, it's... it's getting cold."

His tone was unconvincing, laced with anxiety.

A noise was heard in another direction-- quick footsteps hitting the snow, twigs snapping. The camera was jerked over to said direction... where some freshly rustled tree branches were swaying gently.

The chat was not happy.

"... I... think it went that way, gamers— I-I mean Jaymers. We’re… gonna find a Cryptid, yeah?”

Jay continued in the direction of the rustled branches for another 5 minutes. It started to lightly snow during that time.

The camera shook slightly the whole way.

Finally, he and the audience came upon a clearing in the woods. The only ones truly there were Jay and the snow.

Total silence. Jay slowly turned the camera to face him. His face was creased with lines of fear, and he talked in an unsteady voice.

“Well, chatters… we’re here now. I’m really not sure if the Cryptid is anywhere near us right now. Honestly, I think I want to turn back now… But! If I get 100 more subscribers in the next 5 minutes, I’ll keep go—“

Suddenly, Jays eyes widened, and his mouth hung agape. He seemed to be staring at something off screen.

“… huh?”

He turned the camera again.

Something— or perhaps someone— was on the other side of the clearing.

Not many fine details could be seen from where Jay stood. Who/whatever it was, it was tall and stood with a slight hunch on two legs. Its face (or head) seemed long, with two ear like appendages atop it. It was also… wearing something blue?

Either way, the creature stood in silence.

Until Jay piped up again.

“Oh. My. GOD. We did it, chatters!!”

Jay turned himself around and his excited face appeared in the frame as the Winter Beast stood.

“We found a Cryptid! We actually found a Cryptid!!! I cant believe it, Jay-mers— the Winter Beast is real!”

The chat erupted in figurative applause. People said things like “LETS GOOOOOOOO” and “WE DID IT YOTUB” and “Common James W”. Comments such as “well technically it’s not a Cryptid anymore since you’ve confirmed it exists” were not considered.

“This is no lie the coolest thing we’ve done, Jay-mers. I’m gonna get SO. MUCH. INTERNATIONAL CLOUT for this. Guys, if I get 500 subscribers in the next 5 minutes, I’ll go UP FACE TO FACE with the beast!”

Jay was so enraptured in rooting his own horn, he didn’t notice or hear the beast bounding up impossibly fast behind him… until it bounced.

Jays phone was released from his grasp as he yelped in shock, and fell to the snowy ground. The camera was now facing towards the sky, with some trees in the bottom of the frame.

Though the view was barren, and the camera was very slowly being covered with snowflakes, the stream wasn't devoid of sound.

The tearing of clothes could be heard off screen, along with the sounds of growling, hissing, and thumping.

Along with Jay's voice.

"STOP! STOP IT! STO-- ow, shi-- OW! SOME ONE, ANYONE, HELP! PLEASE! STOP HURTING ME, I DIDN'T MEAN ANY BAD BY CO--"

Jay suddenly let out a blood curdling scream, cut short after a few seconds.

The chat was eerily silent.

A new noise started up-- it sounded like a harsh, gurgling noise. Soon, it was joined by wheezing and gasping.

Eventually, both noises stopped.

After a few seconds, another noise started. It sounded like something getting dragged through the snow.

The phone tilted a bit from its current position, and the ground and clearing entered the frame, albeit askew. Now the viewers had a better angle.

The Winter Beast was dragging Jay-- well, Jay's body through the snow. His eyes were turned up to the sky, now faded in color, and some blood leaked from his mouth. The most noticeably thing, though, was the large gash in his neck, and a curtain of blood was slowly pouring out and dripping off his coat, staining the snow pink into red.

The Beast looked up.

He made eye contact with the camera.

He dropped the cats corpse in the snow, and crawled over to the phone.

His face could be seen in all of its horrible glory now. Both ears were flopped over and dark purple at the tips, and the same colour was on his nose as well. On the bridge of the nose, the skin had peeled away, revealing a patch of bone. One eye was completely covered by ice, and looked away in a different direction than the other. His lower jaw had completely rotted to bone, exposing his bottom teeth and his floppy grey-green tongue. Blood soaked his maw and dripped off onto his ratty blue coat.

He picked up the phone and stared into the camera, and spoke one sentence.

"I hope you all enjoyed the show."

The frame quickly changed to the top of the Beasts head, as if he had raised it up, before the scenery started spinning and spinning and--

The sound of metallics and glass crunching was heard for a millisecond.

The stream ended.

[writers-ex]

spider 2shin?!?! why didn't they save y/n that's so mean 😭😭😭😭i thought at least yuna would've hmp also ryujin stealing a kiss 👀🫣🥵 that's hOT THAT's HOT !!! hgnfjfhdjxhdhsndjdjsjjs excited for the next installment!!!

also yoo!!! YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU LIKE PJO!??? i love pjo 😭😭😭😭 i remember waiting for the release of the last book of the series that was a sequel to pjo i read it bc i loved pjo so much skdjdjsjsjdjs

also !!! i like dancing as well we have a lot of stuff in common 💗💗💗 i mean i'm not good at it but i wanna get back to dancing as exercise hnghhh i had itzy's not shy and it'z summer memorized before as well as bp's playing w fire idk if i still do now hnghh hopefully i find the time again but wow i can't imagine dancing and singing in front of an audience i'd be too embarrassed you're so nrave for that😩

ALSO ALSO!! u right frozen 2 slayed!! icb disney deleted the video that they made for THE promotion of disney+ here probably bc the one w inti the unknown got millions of views (3M last i checked if i'm not mistaken??) compared to their other videos to promote their shows hmp!!! there's only one out of three left (https://youtu.be/1tcFWWkjKjc)

thankfully someone recorded the one that got millions of views (a member of my fave grp was there too he sang w one famous actress and another power vocal who won a tv competition) bc i downloaded the hd version of the video but deleted it bc i didn't think disney would delete another video 😭😭😭 (they deleted janella's version of How Far I'll Go that she sang for moana's release years ago bc it got more views than the original/american version so there's only one video left of that performance which is on wish bus😭😭😭)

https://youtu.be/A4ugutCN3bs

https://youtu.be/FbeaY3BHXVA wAIT NO IT's BACK?! IN THE OFFICIAL CHANNEL?! i have hope for the disney+ performance then 🥹 but it might take yrs dafuq

https://youtu.be/RbIy7RVM9OQ this one has the third performance which is so cool bc zack performed in a historical site within the capital city (i live in the greater area of the city lmao)

you won't be able to save these performances in the spotify playlist i'm afraid hngh

also last !!! thank you for the well wishes for ppop 🥹 yea you said it right haha it's just my way of contributing to helping ppop rise hngh no pressure at all but if you or anyone else is interested here's a ten min vid of a fan organized event that i didn't get to attend bc it happened on sunday and sunday is family dayy (we passed by the venue event on the way home but i didn't see anything :(( one of my fave gg made a surprise appearance after having just performed somewhere else they appeared last "KAIA" in the interview and all of this was for free no fee for artists they willingly went to perform for fans 🥹🥹🥹)

https://youtu.be/Eh0-Yb73dpA

ahhh!! thank u for listening i'm gonna give y'alls a break from the links and stuff this is my last for a while hahaha

- 😚

i will write the pt 2 of the spider!itzy y/n revenge plot when i have time and if i dont within a month plz remind me T^T anyone actually- im dead serious plz remind me i will forget

I LOVE PJO!! i read his stuff during the pandemic and it began my comfort series, i'm stoked for his next book and the disney show <333333 i am a camphalf blood camper and felt a connection with jason bc glasses buddies unite :)

and dang i just learned twice TT, bts's bapsae, pentagon shine (THATS MY SONG), and skz miroh but i've been forgotten them :,)

i gotchu here are the links to some amazing performances <3 and darn :,) i'll make a youtube playlist for myself then hehe the moana one isn't working btw T_T

link one

link two

link three

and NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO you're welcome to keep spamming ik life gets busy and rough but the ask box and my dms will always be open if you need a pick me up or smol drabble or just to say hey :3 i gotchu boo

[crybabychim]

Hiiii! I love your work💗:)

I'm kind of new to Tumblr, and I just recently found one of your posts on my FYP and loved it, but I was wondering why you don't like it when people like ur fics? Is it because they reach more people when they get reblogged or does it just mean something else?

Anyway just wanted to know😅 I'm definitely gonna be hanging around in ur blog tho...

hiii, thank you so much 🤍

it's not people liking my fics that I don't like, it's rather spam liking me. so liking aaaalll my fics one after the other in the spam of like 1 minute. reblogging actually is wayyy better because this is how my posts reach more people, in fact likes do nothing but serve as a storage for your liked posts.

why I don't like it relates a lot to why I don't like silent readers (now, don't take it the wrong way, I don't hate y'all, you just don't contribute to the reason why I continue posting 😅). people who spam like are often silent readers who never reach out to me. they don't reblog my posts either (which I would really appreciate because if you like my stories... why not reblog them...?), they don't comment, they don't send asks (maybe in anon, but idk so 🤷🏻‍♀️), they typically just never interact with me. and interaction is a big part of why I share my fics here, it motivates me a lot to continue posting. im not asking everyone to interact with every fic of mine, but from time to time, it's really appreciated.

I've been asked this question a lot before and im aware that readers take that very personally sometimes lol but yk, I dont really expect people who aren't content creators to understand. I do really appreciate some of you guys (like you anon) to ask questions and just simply learn how I feel instead of taking this the wrong way 🫶🏻

ANYWAY glad you found my blog <33 have a good time here xx

[himbos-hotline]

I want to send more asks with writing prompts or anything but im scared to bother you since i already sent a ask 🥺

Btw i love that friend tag, in reality i was like friend tag? so i made some friends with this account? And it made me so happy

-@freshlychaos

Oh no sweetheart, dont feel like youre bothering me at ALL!like youre doing the completel opposite! It might take me until I have more spoons to answer asks like writing requests or video edits. But I always say "you can spam my inbox" and i MEAN LIKE SPAM IT! ya know, so many asks and conversations and different headcanons or really anything! Questions about my OC Jay is always REALLY accepted and loved because I love talking about my genderqueer little gremlin and his polycule, it makes me happy! I promise that nobody sending me multiple asks if bothering me! same with the people who leave me multiple messages or DMS, flood all my notifcations. It makes me feel so loved and aodred and important and part of the community because I really just cant message people first at all since I have really bad social anxiety and have had people get really annoyed that I dont send asks because of many reasns that I did go into in a post

but yeah to everyone who sends sees this. You are completely and utterly fine to send me so many asks that you forget, youre also fine to send just one. I love everyone who followers me we're all getting lunch together! I have my anons on if people are shy or dont wanna be revealed, y'all just throw an emoji at the end or a little things like "star anon" and youre my special little anon pal!

also im really glad that you like the friend tag! I think it really just feels very us. I am holding your hand like chuckie holds trents! you made friends the first ask buddy! I always go "yay were friends now!" whenever people send me asks or dms

[elizabethospeaks]

PSA: Tumblr RP Blog Rules are NOT optional reading!

So you've found an RP blog for your favourite canon character in your fandom for what the heck ever. They post a tonne of neat headcanons, drabbles, character art; and of course, RP.

Even though you don't run an RP blog yourself please please read their rules page!

Most RP blogs will have them and most will even have their rules displayed on a mobile accessible page.

RP can be a very personal, exposing thing, and a lot of RPers are not comfortable with having their ideas and writing exposed to a fandom at large. It can clog their notifications making it difficult to track their RP posts, amongst a whole other host of personal reasons.

Tumblr is a platform where the format is based around sharing content; but for alot of independent RPers (RPers who aren't part of a group), there aren't other options for finding other RPers in their chosen fandom.

RP blog rules are there so a Mun, an RP blog writer, can tell you what they are or are not comfortable with in regards to their content. Most if not all will state in their rules if they are comfortable with personal blogs sharing their content.

By following an RP blogs rules, we can all enjoy their content whilst making sure the human being at the other end can carry on making content and being comfortable doing so ♡