#i dont know what went wrong with the upload but everything got FUCKED

[onlyjaeyun]

i’ve been following ur writing for some time now and i do have to agree with that anon who said you did CH dirty. you are a very talented writer so it’s just hard to watch.

you started off CH so strong with the lore and little chapters here and there but as it progressed you kind of just got lazy and it shows. when important events happened in the story, they weren’t conveyed through writing but through the texts (ie the riki and yn fight, that was definitely worth a written chapter) and it was honestly disappointing.

the ending isn’t much to say about either. yn and hoon barely go through development after the letter incident and all of a sudden they’re dating and married with a kid like two chapters later?

idk, if it was a mental health issue then i get that but even then you should’ve just gave it a break and thought everything out more. you could do so much better.

thank you for the feedback!

i wanna put you through the progess of a piece of writing from the POV of a writer okay? now keep in mind: i work two jobs, am a fulltime uni student and the daughter of an immigrant household with two parents who still work most of the day just so you know what else i have to deal with, besides my mental health okay?

now, i started off CH strong right? yes. i uploaded on the daily, fine i chose that. a chapter usually takes me around one hour if i actually sit down and focus on nothing but the chapter itself, which includes IG stories, editing, formatting etc. alright

on top of the daily chapters, i constantly replied to 40+ asks a day, a blessing in disguise because no matter how much i enjoy talking to you guys, the pressure does get worse the bigger that number of my inbox becomes, i hope this makes sense

now, i started CH back in october, right when my semester started, thats why i started off strong but as time went on, my assignments and private life got too busy and i guess i felt entitled enough as a writer to skip a few certain chaps and make life a little easier for me by making them regular chapters instead of written ones.

and this is gonna be my main point: i'm not a machine. i wrote a minimum of 5 THOUSAND words per written chapter, MINIMUM. we're talking about a 5-9 THOUSANDED worded chapter EACH WEEK. which usually took me about 6-7 hours, even allnighters.

yes, i chose to do that and maybe my time management wasn't the best but i had to create a compromise where i wouldnt have let you guys wait for over two months which would have resulted in me losing my motivation completely, and yet still focusing on EXAMS. because you know, i'm a fulltime uni student with TWO jobs 😮‍💨

if YOU think i did CH dirty go write an alternative ending yourself but it should be a minimum of 15 chapters including 5 written ones, with at LEAST 9k words each yeah? i wanna see you manage it all, pls prove me wrong snd show me you're better than me i'm genuinely begging bc it might inspire me to do "better" next time.

as a writer/artist/creator, and i can tell you probably arent one yourself or havent been one for long, the longer smth takes to come to an end the worse the pressure becomes which results in a blockage i dont wish upon my worst enemy i'm being deadass. i dealt with some of the worst writer's block ive had since i started writing literally 12 years ago and you're telling me i should have just "taken a break" and do "better"

i never, ever expected anything from anyone but some of you are so entitled to a writer's time and skill it's giving me a headache. maybe you didn't like the timing and writing of the last few chapters of CH and i guess that's unfortunate but this was so unnecessary because you completely dismissed everything else that could have been going on in my life and even belittled my mental health issues like im some fucking AI writing machine

do better, be nicer, write it yourself if you don't like it i'm so fucking over this

if i had gotten out of my own comfort and wellbeing and have actually written another set of written chapters i would have burned myself completely out. ive been in this fandom for not even a year and have already finished FOUR smaus with 50 chapters each, you do NOT get to tell me what i should or could have done better because you dont even give a fuck about me as a person this is just about receiving what YOU think YOURE entitled to but this is MY art and I will do what I see fit even if it's not what was expected of it because i'm a fucking human being with a life before i'm a writer on tumblr

oh, also: i do this for free ㅤ:) just a reminder :) this is my HOBBY :)

and don't you EVER call me lazy again when it comes to writing because i'm not gonna pour my heart and soul into a fic just for you to call me lazy when i literally wrote 50 THOUSAND words for this fucking fic just for the written chapters

goodbye

[bittertarot]

you are so cool and non judgemental to chat with, so thanks very much once again! yeah I think the whole hysteria abojt idols fs in away its intruiging from a non obsessive point of view but for those who do obsess about idols fs are going to be in for a shock whenber idols are revealed to be dating and shock horror, its not themselves.

honestly I regret not really going for it and learning a genuine skill that I could then use later on but sometimes its just matter of having opportunities or being in the right situations to actually gain those skills, for example you could go to a really shitty school and learn something amazing or you can go to a better school but have shitty classmates or teachers that are of no real use to you or courses that arent available and so on and so forth, whilst idols have to go through a lot I do think what they get to do is super cool cause when they pass on they have a legacy to be proud of. Sadly I think it just comes down to them being in the right areas or theyre from the right families who can invest so much into idols gaining their skills and talents. I have yet to really see someone from my country denut in kpop group sooooo it kind of says a lot of where kpop is heading and that they were going to smerica come what may. its just sometimes our situations are very limiting and we cant always win at everything in life either or say you might want to do something but realistically you know its slim to none chances and i think at some point it has an age limit of when you can succeed at it. So even if i wanted to do what i originslly wanted it would take many more years just to get to a good skill and even then you might not be the best at it

I also think sometimes social media makes things neither great nor bad cause people can upload their skills and really empahsis on what they want nowadahs whereas when I was a kid we were doing fuck all with our free time yaknow? kids nowadays shouldnt waste their younger years is what im saying. sometimes i think that i dont fit in with my generation cause of how screen obsessed we all have become and then i dont fit in with newer generations cause they have so many more ways of making success for themselves, im just like what can i offer? honestly not much.

thats also why i lowkey wouldnt mind passing on early just to get out of this screen world that we are in and yet older generations were never bothered with taking selfies then they wouldnt habe been able to get social validation via online, so they were probs happier and things were at least affordable back then. i kinda envy the older generations in that respect, we only got to experience a small handful of years without the pressures of social media and ever since idfk 00s or earlier it kinda went to shit really.

everyone was expected to be online and idk how i really feel about it anymore im sort of over it and modern society generally sucks. so many idols get backlash for no good reason, youtubers who dont do anything wrong get gossiped about and snark pages are endless so even if someone wants to do something amazing with their lives they cant avoid scrutiny of any sorts. its just got way out of hand and its past the point of saying well just dont use it then cause we technically need these devices constantly so ergo its not hard to not be delulu about celebs and the likes either cause its literally everywhere.

Sorry for the late response, been caught up in some important stuff recently (it's not bad stuff LMAO)!! Anyways, thank you so much! I try my best to remain open-minded of any/all perspectives before forming an opinion of my own and even so, I'm very open to hearing others opinions on these matters. Debating issues is something I genuinely enjoy, as long as it is a polite and healthy debate ofc. It is quite interesting, I'd say it has something to do with the "loneliness epidemic" (as I like to call it) of these times. We're in a time where technology is increasing rapidly and human interaction isn't as common, we're more attached to our screens than actual people and that becomes an issue when it places you out of touch with reality! The obsessions over being an FS and whatnot is genuinely awful, like fans hating on idols and their relationships have led to some couples even splitting; look at Lee Jae Wook and Karina from Aespa as our most recent example. It's never too late to try, really. You can learn any skill no matter your age as long as you can put enough effort in, remain disciplined and dedicate time to it! I think your point there is quite valid, but since technology has advanced so rapidly, you can realistically learn most skills online now by a few quick google searches, taking notes, learning and applying them practically. I think it is quite cool how idols have a legacy that'll be remembered for a while. It's something I'd want to achieve before passing on, as even though making an impact, being remembered, etc isn't a neccessity it does in a way lessen the anxiety about passing on? It makes you feel like there is a chance that people will still mention you, bring you up, that what you did could be studied or researched by other people, that your story could motivate others into getting their shit together, etc. A lot of idols aren't in the right areas or families, though. I'll use BTS as an example here; some members had extremely poor families and were from a run-down agency that could never compete with the big 3. Look at where they are now? They single-handedly built up their label, going from Bighit to HYBE. Practice makes perfect, the more you practice, the more work you put in, the better you will get at that skill! Obviously, blind optimism isn't helpful but if you take the realistic steps in place to where you want to be in the next few years now; it will happen and you will succeed. I completely agree that we, as a society, have all become too screen obsessed and I'm also guilty of this, but it is an issue. It's caused a lot of parents to just let the screen teach their kids, too. I'm sure you have a lot to offer to the world, even if you might not think so. You can do it, though! I believe in you and I'm proud of what you have done so far :] !! I had a discussion with a friend about a similar topic to this, but a lot of trends now are fueled by "nostalgia" where things looked happier and less daunting to live in. I think after 2015 is when things started to spiral, but that's my personal take. You're more than free to disagree with anything I've said!! I don't think you should force yourself to be online, stick to the trends, etc. Do what makes you happy and you'll see yourself shine brilliantly! And yeah, a lot of delusional ideals are fueled by big companies nowadays, too, since fans will obviously put more money into those celebs if they feel like they might get "noticed" - which could also be why concert tickets are getting higher and higher even for newly debuted groups. That's my take on all this, though, feel free to respond and add on, agree, disagree, etc! <33

[bluciusmacaw]

Will Wood’s Slouching Toward Bethlehem/Branson Tour - Tucson, Arizona, Rialto Theatre

sorry i have a lot i need to say about this, it was great! It was great! First of all, it was great!

THE EXPERIENCE

Such a whirlwind!!! I wish I had a perfect memory it feels like such a waste to not be able to recall everything perfectly in its entirety!!! I really hope this show gets like the recordings uploaded somewhere, (not Tucson specifically, the man was very sick, so probably not firing on all cylinders, (but he could’ve fooled me!!)) I really need to know that I can hold on to that night just a little bit longer because it was so beautiful genuinely but my mind is flawed and it lets things slip away far too quickly. And it’s not like I was just NOT paying attention I WAS. I WAS. It was just such a barrage of AMAZING stuff that I genuinely could not keep up, I wanted every moment to last forever, but time kept marching on (as it does) and by the end of the show it felt like there was a little world that existed in that theatre and nowhere else, and when it had ended and I was horribly sad to see it go, but at least I was wearing some pants. Seriously, I’m so glad I could be there that night, I think the best word to describe the experience would just be ��WOW!”

Point and Laugh

He preformed …Well, Better than the Alternative during this show and i actually quite liked the part where he slipped up and sang, “everybody’s in on my goddamn business, this isn’t my first krissss it’s………… fuck. BABY COULD YOU PLAY-“ i quite liked that part like yeah. sure maybe he messed up the lyrics but he handled it like a champ and also (i just learned this) his gf’s name is Christina (Kristina?) so perhaps he was just thinking about her u ever consider that huh? oh what u hate love??? u hate ppl who r in love??? give me a fucking break…..

How i shat the bed (unimportant)

I showed up at 5:00 p.m. because I was a little VIP, and I was freaking the FREAK OUT. I was freaking out man I don’t think I’ve ever been that scared to watch someone ELSE preform before but I was like a MESS. Will Wood was very sick (physically this time) (hahahah mental illness is funny!) so I couldn’t ask him to sign what I wanted him to sign but i got a FREE tote and The New Normal CD SIGNED so whatevah whatevah!!! But, listen, I went up to Will Wood, I was right there, in the perfect position to say all the things i had rehearsed in the time leading up to the show. and i fucking i forgot to say literally anything. i dont think i even said “hi,” i had two months to prepare just ONE statement for him and i totally shat the bed BUT HE WAS EXTREMELY KIND DESPITE THIS!! HE LIKE STILL SAID “THANK YOU” IN A MANNER THAT I WOULD CONSIDER TO BE EXTREMELY GENUINE!!! AND FUCKING. I ASKED HIM ABOUT REVELATOR (cringe?) AND I FORGOT TO TELL HIM TO TELL CHRIS DUNNE THAT THE WRITING WAS GREAT BUT THATS FINE IM SURE CHRIS ALREADY KNOWS DUE TO THE EPISODE DISCUSSIONS OR THE FEEDBACK CHANNEL ON DISCORD. BUT HE WAS VERY NICE AND VERY FUNNY and in a natural way too, like, if he was forcing it then he is better at improv acting than i thought! (JOKE) no but seriously obviously a lot of stuff had gone wrong leading up to that show but at the end of the day, Will and everyone else involved did a fantastic fucking job and i really commend their ability to do such good work despite the disease. And I’m so glad I got to be in the crowd of such an awesome show!

[x-galactic-star-x]

i just imagine a small idea with Cayde

this is gonna be a little messy but bear with me

also this is gonna be sad so just saying

mention of dying

Stuck together

lets say, you are dying. you followed Cayde wven tho you dont have a light as he had to got to the one place where exos are born and broken.

he went with Banshee to discover sometging and you sneaked after them.

they got surprise Vex attacked and cause they didnt tought that you were there they didnt planned to hwar someone beinf shot at and injured badly.

you are no guardian, you dont have any other chance, or resurect. you have one life.

he hated this. he was actually mad at you but the worry was stronfer as he held you.

Banshee evwn as he was forgetful he kbow what he doing most of the time, as he told them there is a chance to save you.

you might not like it but there is no time to loose.

as they ran around the place Banshee found the machine that could help.. but the problem is, there isnt any functional shall nearby and the closes to them might be way too far and it would be too late to get.

while you are slowly loosing sight and concousness Cayde lied you down on the table..

then everything went dark with the voice of Cayde and Banshee yelling..

suddenly you wake up.. gasping. . where are you? what happene? why is it so cold? is it cold? warm? you dont know and as you looked around you saw a guy with spikes on his head.. it feels like you know him.. he's talking to you.

he telling you to breath.. breath? ok ok breath.. but then you looked down.

wait

this isnt your legs.. you slowly turn around and saw.. you.. on the table.. with weird helmet with a lot of vires on your head.

but.. what? you look down and you slowly realize..

"CAYDE?? WHAT? What happened to me??!?" you shouted in a panic as Banshee tried to calm you down.

"kiddo i need you to listen to me-"

he tried but cling to your gear.. Cayde's gear.. fuck how did this happened??

"Hey hey hey. listen to me sweetheart-" you gasped as you backes away into the corner of the room and curled up in a ball. you can hear Cayde..

"Listen... its all right ok? Banshee have everything under control. we managed to save you, ok?" he spoke in your head as you tried to catch your breath.. even tho you dont exactly need it anymore but its a comfort..

"listen.. we will fix this we will help you but for now you suck.. with me.. and in my body." you want ro cry.. but you cant ahed tears.. not anymore.. you want him near.. but he is near he's literally with you.. but you want his arms around you... like it was used to be..

"Cayde.. im.. this is wrong.."

"i had to save you somehow.."

"i want you here.."

"im right here."

"you know what i mean."

".. i know sweetheart.. i know.."

you felt your body goes numb as all you can do is watch.. as he took control.

"we'll fix this.. i swear."

______________________

i would say it would be the same as uploading an exo mint to another, and honestly i just imagined that as a human you would be 100% be rly panicky if you are suddenly in the same body as your lover/best friend..

and the lonely feeling about wanting to bw in their arms but you cant.. cause you are in the same body.. but its just not the same.

he wont be able to play with your hair or mess it up like he used to and he cant rly cuddle up with you until you get your own body..

my brain just kept imagining someone else panicing in Cayde body as they freaking out being in his body and controlling it.. like it felt wrong. that its not them.

but anyway, enjoy this idea, i dunno if i should take credit of it cuz im sure someone else tought about this idea already

tootles❤️♠️

[morgana-ren]

i need. More repressed shigaraki

Oh babe you asked for it and so yougot it 

Part I and II here

At this point, it’s been a few weeks, and Shigaraki is as close to coming to terms with his feelings for youas he’s going to get. That’s not saying much, since now that he realizes the trouble he’s in, that means he’s going to have to actually do something about it, right? Now, our boy is a man of action, but this? This is uncharted territory for him, and he doesn’t like that one bit. 

He’d rather go toe to toe with All Might than act on what he feels for you. Battles are a matter of strength, calculation, and strategy. Worst comes to worst, he could retreat and try again another day. But this? Too many variables, too many questions. Feelings are irrational and random, and there’s no way to calculate that.

Plus, if you reject him, it’s gameover, and there’s no continue. He’s not sure he could handle that. 

It drives him insane whenever he thinks about it, which is far more often than he’s comfortable with. What if you said no? What if you said yes? Then what? What could he possibly offer you?Ask you back to his room to play video games together? Then you would definitely notice the slowly accumulating pile of your ‘missing’ undergarments he’s been hoarding. 

He’s too notorious to take you out somewhere nice, and even if he wasn’t, he wouldn’t know where to begin. Brush his ratty hair? Cologne? Pull out your chair and kiss your hand after he gives you flowers? Pleh. 

Make you dinner at the hideout? Hope you like ramen and soda in a Dixie cup. This man is barely learning how to do laundry for himself, let alone cook. Not to mention, he’d never hear the end of it from the rest of the League. The infamous Shigaraki smitten? What a joke. 

The thought makes him want to wretch. 

Truthfully, he wants you to want him for who he is. He wants you to be content with your head in his lap while he plays his game, stroking your hair between rounds. He wants to hear your gentle sighs as you sleep curled up next to him like a cat while he just watches you nap peacefully in his room. He wants you to not shy away when he brings his lips to yours, for you not to care about the broken, scratchy texture of his mouth as he kisses you. 

In his mind, he might as well ask for his family back. He figured it had been made plenty clear over the course of his years that he was nothing special to look at. He spent most of his time isolated, so he never garnered the skills to be charming. The only girls he’s ever really talked to were the ones he taunted on online matches or subordinates when he gave orders, and those two things were genderless in his head. 

He had never bothered to figure outthe complex formalities of dating, since it was usually so far from his mind. Even when he had a surge of hormones, he could usually handle it with his hand and a few hours alone. He could forget whatever it was that had triggered his arousal. But you were always around, always near by. It was driving him to the limits of madness, and his libido was redlining and on the brink of explosion. 

Even from across the base, he could swear he could smell you. His heart would begin pounding in his ears whenever he heard your voice. He couldn’t even look at you anymore since his pasty skin would certainly flush if your eyes lingered on him for too long, and that would be a dead giveaway. 

He had begun becoming protective of you, positioning you near the back during an attack where he could protect you because he couldn’t stand the thought of you getting harmed. When you were in the thick of battle, he was always there, always watching. He knew you weren’t harmless. Not with the skillful way your feet could dance around your enemies,but he watched regardless. Completely enthralled with the gentle sway of your hair as you evaded a hit, the curve of your leg as you brought the heel of your foot into a heroes chest. 

Not to mention the way your body moved, a brutal clash of ferocity and femininity that made his knees weak. 

It had almost gotten him wiped more than once. 

You were becoming a distraction. One he didn’t quite know how to deal with. He was never one to beat around the bush, but this was something so far outside of his expertise. He had spent grueling nights trying to find something, anything  he could do to woo you, but it always ended up with him feeling foolish as he replayed your rejection over and over in his mind. 

He did have one strength though. One tiny little advantage. 

You admired him. He knew that much. 

Ever since the first night, he had been acting different around you, and you had definitely taken notice. He had been distant, cold even, and he knew you weren’t taking it well. Whenever you tried to talk to him, he would turn away and ignore you. He had pulled you back from the front of battle and you figured it was because he thought you were stupid and inept. He wouldn’t even look at you anymore, and he knew it was hurting you in one way or another. 

Your cute little head had rationalized his behavior as him hating you. Like he was shoving you off and even annoyed by you. You didn’t understand what you had done wrong, and you were trying so hard to get back into his good graces, desperately trying to appeal to him one way or another. 

It was adorable. You wanted so badly for him to like you. If only you knew how much. 

Even now, you sat curled up on the sofa in the main room, watching him as he played his game. Everyone else had long gone to bed, but ever since his switch in disposition, you had been staying up later and later, trying to understand why he was so dismissive of you lately. You figured if you were the only one he could talk to, eventually he’d relent, and damned if you weren’t persistent. He admired your tenacity. 

His four fingered grip on the controller was shaky and slippery, palms sweaty and overheated. He could feel your gaze switching between the back of his head and the game, occasionally asking him questions about what he was playing and the story line, which he would answer in short, one word answers. Every molecule in his arms ached topull you into his lap and explain every single thing in express detail, teach you how to play, quiz you and “reward or punish” you based on how attentive youwere.

The minuscule amount of self control he had kept him from doing it. 

Instead he maintained his facade of aloofness, like he was simply tolerating your presence. He could tell it was disheartening you, and it yanked on his heartstrings, but he refused to let himself act on it. It would be too slippery of a slope. It wasn’t time yet. 

Yet, it didn’t matter how far the moon traveled across the sky or how curt his answers were, you stayed put. You only left once to put pajamas on (thankfully not the ones that drove him into a frenzy, but just a pair of sleepy pants and a tank top) and had been glued to the spot ever since. A little past midnight and he could hear you yawning. Few hours beyond that and you were nodding off. He even told you to go to bed once or twice, and you’d only respond with “I’m okay.” 

Truthfully, it made him feel a little fuzzy inside that you were so determined to be his friend. Tomura was used to sleepless nights and insomnia. He wasn’t entirely sure that you were,and he knew you had a busy day that day. The fact that you were so adamant about staying by his side despite that filled him with warmth and only served to increase his ever-growing neediness for you. 

However, around two thirty, he heard you jostle behind him. His heart sank, figuring that you were leaving despite the fact that he knew it was an inevitability. I mean you had to go to bed sometime, right? His eyes couldn’t help but follow you through to the door, lingering unprofessionally long on a certain rear curve beneath your pants, having to physically restrain himself from touching you. However, instead of turning toward the bedroom area, you headed to the facilities. 

You weren’t leaving, you were going to the bathroom. 

His suspicion was confirmed when he turned around and your cell phone and drink were still strewn about the table behind him. Your drink. That you were drinking. Your drink? Your drink...

He reaches his hand in his pocket and pulls out a bottle of prescription pills. Sleeping pills Kurogiri had gotten for him when his insomnia had reached an all time high and was making him sick. He kept them on him in case he ever needed them, but he still had plenty left... 

He eyes the liquid, and then the pills. Back and forth. Back and forth. He knows exactly what he’s thinking, but refuses to admit it. He wasn’t seriously thinking of drugging you. Was he? 

You were so cute, so trusting. Leaving your drink out in a villain hideout where anyone could tamper with it. You looked so tired. You weren’t taking care of yourself. Taxing your own body Just to keep close to him. But you could do both. You could take care of yourself and stay close to him. 

He was going to help you. 

Pushing up from his chair, he pops the bottle open and shakes a pill out into his hand. Wait, better make it two. Just in case. You needed your rest. 

He makes sure to keep an ear out forthe bathroom door as he creeps toward your beverage. When he’s certain he has time, he plops the pills into your drink, quickly stirring it with his lengthy fingers so that it’s dissolved by the time you come back. When he’s satisfied,he holds up the drink to the light, just to make sure there’s no stray pill dust lingering around that could catch your attention. 

He’s not doing anything wrong. He’s helping you! You really should be sleeping you know, and it’s his job as leaderto take care of you if you won’t take care of yourself. 

He hears the door open at the farend of the hall and he scurries to his seat, nearly stumbling over the giant bulk of cords that lead to the tv. Regardless, when you enter the room again, he’s sitting in his same spot, game unpaused and face impassive. You’re none the wiser to his little trick. 

You shuffle back to your little cove on the sofa and settle in, pulling your blanket up over your hips before turning and watching him play again. His lip can’t help but curl in a devious smile as he hears the familiar clink of the glass as you lift your drink to your lips, taking several deep gulps. Mission completed. 

Over the next hour, your movements become sloppier and eventually fewer and farther between. By four am, he can hear you breathing even out completely and you’ve stopped moving entirely. He’s fairly certain you’ve fallen asleep, but he needs to be sure.

“Hey.” 

No response from you. 

He says it again, a little louder and more harsh this time. 

Still no response. You never ignore him, so you must really be out. 

He pauses his game, slowly lifting himself up from his sitting position and turns towards you. Much like he expected, you are dead asleep on the sofa, your drink completely empty. It’s now or never. 

He practically crawls toward you until he’s standing at the foot of the sofa, leering down at your sleeping face. You look so peaceful, so tender, so cute. He can’t help but to lean down and gently press the tips of three of his fingers to your cheek. Your skin is warm and welcoming, the complete opposite of his bony digits. So he lets his hand relax a bit, keeping his pinky and his thumb held outward as he lets his palm rest on you as well. 

He traces over the gentle curve of your face, cradling your cheeks and feeling up around your forehead, making apoint to brush the stray hair out of the way. He watches you as you sleep, trying to engrave your features into his memory intimately since it’s something he can’t do when you’re awake. Before long, he realizes he’s sitting on his knees, leaning in so close to you that he can feel the gentle breeze of your breath against his skin. He’s aching now, wants to be able to grab you so hard it hurts but he knows he can’t, so he’ll settle for exploring. 

One of his fingertip makes its way downward, tracing the outline of your slightly agape lips. The texture is sucha stark contrast to his own that he almost pulls away in insecurity. You’re so soft, so plush. It’s nothing like the cracks and crevasses that mar his own flesh. He can’t help but move his hand slightly downward, poking innocently at the plump jut of your lower lip. 

He does this for a moment before he realizes he’s trying to fool himself. He don’t want to poke you. He wants something else. 

It takes him several minutes to workup the courage, and several minutes more to get close enough, but eventually he’s so close to you that his mouth is barely brushing against yours. He wantsto do this when you’re awake, wants you to want it too, but it seems like nothing but a distant fantasy. This seems like this the best he’s ever going toget. 

Gingerly, he pushes down, pressinghis lips to yours. 

It’s innocent at first, at least until the taste of you makes its way inside his mouth. Like an animal feasting on its first taste of human blood, this sparks a dark, carnal need in him that twists his resolve into dust. It doesn’t take long before his hand is clutching the side of your neck, pulling you closer to him as he slips his tongue betweenyour pliant lips. His other hand is resting on your exposed collarbone, dangerously close to the curve of your breasts. 

He lets his instincts take over, sighing into your mouth and rapidly spiraling into total mental failure. He’s biting on your lower lip and sucking, tongue exploring every last centimeter he can reach. He wants more. He needs more. He doesn’t know much right now but he knows if he can’t have you, he will fucking die. 

It isn’t until he hears you moanthat he practically short circuits. Your arms are covered in goosebumps, andyou’re wiggling slightly in your sleep. Both of your lips are gratuitously coated in his slippery saliva, mingling your fluids into one intoxicating taste. His mind is going blank and his vision is practically tunneling. He can feel his hand on the strap of your tank top, practically ripping it down.

He’s losing control and he knows it. So he does the only thing he can do. 

He shoves himself away from you like you were on fire. 

He kicks away from the sofa so fast it practically rips his pants off, tearing the hood of his hoodie off his head as the bottom gets caught beneath in the friction. 

The noises emitting from yourthroat, however innocent, are positively sinful in his mind. Your unseen gravitational force is trying to lure him back in, hands moving of their own accord as they reach for you again. It’s too much, it’s too fucking much and if he doesn’t stop now, he knows he’s going to do something that both of you will regret. 

The whine he produces is akin to a kicked puppy dog. He wants it, he wants it so badly and he could take it if he wanted. But he can’t. He can’t do that to you. Preferably when the time comes, he wants you to be just as willing as he is, maybe even more so. He has to lock his desires away for another night, despite the screaming and reeling in his mind. 

He yanks the console cord out without saving, chucking the controller into the corner and shutting down the tv. He cements it in his mind that he’s going to leave you be, however badly every bone in his body is protesting it. As he goes to leave though, he spares you one last glance.

Your body is still goosebumped, and you’re shivering slightly. Your blanket had fallen halfway down your thighs during his craze, and now you were probably cold. Guilt chides him into returning to you one last time, if only to pull your blanket over your shoulders. 

He contemplates carrying you to yourroom, but ultimately decides against it. It would raise too many questions. You’ll be safe here, no one would hurt you. You might wake up with a slight muscle cramp, but it’s nothing compared to the bumps and bruises you get on thedaily. You’d sleep like the dead too, catch up on all that rest you’d been sacrificing for him. 

He flips off the light and stalksdown the hallway to his room, leaving you to your slumber. He’s acutely awareof the straining beneath his jeans, kicking his legs awkwardly to avoidchafing. He concedes to himself one thing though. He’ll make a detour to yourroom. It’s laundry day tomorrow, and things tend to get lost. You wouldn’t miss a thing or two. 

[sleepy-dreamers-inc]

ok but like wilbur as a dad? like him taking care of you while you pregnant and making sure you feel amazing and confident and just supporting you.. fuck man

Wilbur as a Dad!|| 🌼

irl / in-game

Genre| fluff

h e a d-c a n n o n s||

Sypnosis|

WILBUR AS A DAD POG

Artist| yanteruu on twitter!

warnings: pregnancy!!

(also pronouns are still gender neutral bc pog)

a/n: THIS ANON KNOWS WHO I SIMP FOR THIS HAS FED ME-

- he was with you in the bathroom as you took the test, leaning against the wall as you did your thing, he simply stared at you much to you wondering why he was.

- It didn’t matter though once beeping bounced off the bathroom walls, as you got up and walked over to him, only looking at it with him.

positive.

- Wilbur never picked you up so fast, he was laughing and giggling as he burried his face into your chest, he was so happy.

“Y/N!! Im- Im gonna be a dad!” He cried out, putting you down but grasping your shoulders. Y/N simply looked up at him, teary eyed and smiling. “Yeah, Wilbur, and you’ll be a great one.” Y/N said, standing on they’re tippy-toes and wrapping they’re arms around his neck, trying to give him a kiss. He simply smiled, snaking his hands to your torso, pulling both of you closer to his body. All he did was press his lips against yours, so softly yet passionate. As both of you separated, all Wilbur had to say was,

“I love you, both of you.”

- Although he was protective of you before, he definitely was now. Well... more of clingy. He was always by your side and catered to all of yours and your babies needs.

- Morning cuddles where your both laying in bed, his head beneath your chest, but above your stomach. He loved the intimacy, being able to be close to the 2 most dearest people in his life.

- Telling Philza and Tommy when you were about 3 weeks in, Tommy screaming while Phil was the definition of [surprised pikachu face]

“W-wait? Y/N’s pregnant?” Phil asked, all 3 of them met up at a small cafe since he wanted to spend some time with his other family. “Yeah!! Dad, im gonna be a dad!” Wilbur jumped in his seat, he was so giddy about everything, not that anyone was complaining.

“Wait... this doesn’t mean you’re going to be spending less time with m- i mean us right?” Tommy said, his face toward his drink, yet looking up at his older brother.

“Awwwww Tommy-!!” Wilbur cooed, looking at the teenager with adoration. “I wont be online much in the later months, but for now my schedule will be relatively the same.” Wilbur stated, sipping his drink, looking at Tommy. “But hey, wanna go back to my place and see Y/N? They didn’t want to come since ‘they didn’t want to ruin the surprise.’” Wilbur asked, both boys nodded as they headed out.

- The ENTIRE SMP traveling to the UK to see you, they already loved you before, but my god they practically stole you from Wilbur for a few.

- Techno was,, surprisingly protective of you. Whenever you were out in public and Wilbur wasn’t there, he was right by your side. He liked you before, you were incredibly nice to talk with, and never minded his tangents.

- Wilbur asking Techno if he has anything to confess, only for Techno to punch him in the shoulder as you giggled

- Setting up a baby room would be both adorable and a disaster. Wilbur would have no clue what he’d be doing most of the time, but seeing him laughing and giggling as he smiled at his mistakes... your heart simply melted

- Him kissing your stomach. This is very important. Every chance he gets, he kisses your stomach. Without hesitation. Even if your not showing, he’ll still do it.

- Both of you going out on little shopping trips, picking out baby stuff.

“Y/N!! Look at this onesie! We have to get it, the baby will look even more adorable.” Wilbur giggled, as he put the article of clothing into the trolly. “Wilbur, sweetie, dont you think we already bought enough?” Y/N asked, smiling a contagious smile as they looked at they’re lover.

- Telling his fanbase was a tad bit interesting, it was during a Geoguesser stream, where you walked into the room, you were in your second trimester by now, so it was very obvious you were, indeed, pregnant.

- So when you walked in to get some laundry, obviously pregnant, and in view, his chat went CRAZY

‘WILBUR?? WILBUR???!!???’

‘Wilbur got something to fess up?’

‘The fangirls are quaking’

‘Hes got someone in his bed AND in his twitch chat pog’

‘POG?????’

‘Wilbur says hes a soft boy on the streets but a freak in the sheets-‘

- Wilbur just say there wide eyed, as he turned around and looked over at you. You were bending down to grab some clothes, unaware of the situation. He quickly sprung up though, grabbing the clothes out of your hands, quickly throwing them off the bed.

“Love!! I thought you said you were going to rest...” Wilbur mumbled, pulling you close, rocking both of your forms back and forth. “I did, Wilby, but work around the house needs to be done, for the baby-“ “No, you need to rest for the baby. The baby will not be happy if they’re beautiful parent is not getting the proper rest they need and deserve.” He said, looking at you with a pouty face. Y/N simply sighed then giggled, finally giving in.

“Oh also... wanna introduce the little one to chat..? They saw you two.” Wilbur asked, scratching the back of his neck, looking at his partner.

- Singing lullabies to the baby, even if its not born yet. He’ll lighty strum his guitar, humming a tune as you lay next to him, enjoying both’s presence

- Wilbur constantly holding onto you, ESPECIALLY in public. Someone will look at you the wrong way and all the sudden Wilbur is practically suffocating you, eyeing the person who dare look at you the wrong the way

- Making special lullabies for the baby once they’re born, he’ll sing them to both of you before bed, and it always lulls you to sleep

- Orca plushie, Orca plushie

- You know that man bought little beanies and sweaters. Sorry its canon.

- When the baby started to kick he legitimately cried. He was so happy, all he wanted was to hold his baby.

- A absolute mess when Y/N is delivering the baby, he’s just pacing around the waiting room as Phil is trying to calm him down.

- Him being a total man baby with Phil, just constantly like ‘daaaAAAAAAD’ ‘phiiiiil i miss Y/N’ ‘i want my babies where are my babies’

- once he gets into the dilivery he is literally just:

- i will make a part 2 of this if requested because i have IDEAS, HEAD FULL MANY THOUGHTS

a/n: i skipped my math class to finish this, so kinda pog. Anyways soft dad wilbur makes me soft, i have writers block atm and have no clue what im even doing half the time but i hope you enjoyed this nonetheless :)

Also finally I uploaded I’ve been stressing for days ; - ;

[technowoah]

Taunt

It only takes one time to realize you fucked up.

- ANON REQUESTED!

- WILBUR X FEM! READER BLURB

PROMPTS!

50) "Fuck off... I mean it"

24) "Get in the car" "..." "please get in the car"

⚠︎ angst to fluff, swearing, based on the song Taunt by Lovejoy ❤🐈 its short btw yall

[Updated 3 hours after upload I messed up the prompts sorry yall now it fixed]

She was always asking if he was alright. He always lied to her just to get her off his back for the night, but it was his fault that he wanted her to move in. He has to deal with that all of the time, it was her fault anyways. She made him upset, she made him not alright. She didn't know that. She constantly complained about things that didn't even concern her, she dodged their relationship making it more about her than them.

It was tiring to him. Constantly providing, trying to tie a broken knot, but he didnt let that get in the way of his career, or his friends. There's another issue, he never talked to his friends about her. She accused him of not being proud of their relationship and that became a problem that never got resolved.

Did anyone ever say "no" to her? Well if no one did, he would be the first one to do so. Fuck that.

He listened, and listened, but nothing kept this relationship together.

Wilbur talked to the three people chatting on his discord through his headphones as a soft LED lights flowed through the room. These nights were simple because she didnt have to see him when he decides to stream, he basically has his time set out for himself without trouble. He wasn't ecstatic, he felt horrible, but the facadè was there.

Her on the other hand wasnt happy either. She never got attention from him, and of course she could get moody from time to time like every other human being, but she always took it out on him. Who else was gonna be there for her? He acted like her cared, she knew he was lying. His "caring" consisted of humming and him responding like a default character in a video game. He didn't care, he acted like he never did. She needed that attention and he knew damn well she did.

She wasnt asking for much, at least to her it did feel like it. She knew when she was wrong, but she didn't want to admit it when they were both in the wrong too. They dont get each other, she didnt know why he asked her to move in when he didn't want anything to do with her. Ever since he moved her in he kept her in check like a child, she hated and loved that at the same time. Its true that she wanted her own way, she did what she wanted and gave her attention to whoever she wanted her attention to be. She thought that was fine, but apparently she dosent give any effort to the relationship.

Rolling her eyes at the thought she decided to leave the dishes in the sink dirty. She thought about leaving and finding someone who will get her, yes Wilbur listened to her, but there was no effort. When he's drunk and tries to "figure out what makes her brain tick" ends up in more distaster.

Lying in the couch her mind began to wonder, he always said that she could get away with anything. She always took it as a taunt. Everytime it was brought up. He called it "pretty privilege" and he always taunts her saying she abuses that power.

Her jaw clenched as she recalled those memories. Summoning the courage she brought herself up onto her feet and rushed to their shared bedroom. Taking a deep breath she opened their closet and started pulling her things off of hangers, not caring if she made a mess. She tossed her clothes onto the messy bed that they didn't bother to make this morning.

Bringing a small backpack out from underneath the bed she tried shoving most of her clothes into a bag for a night. In total frustration she emptied the bag and only backed necessities that she would need for the night.

She was tired of him and he was tired of her so she was doing both of them a favor. She made her way out of the door grabbing a coat and sliding on some simple shoes. Shooting a quick text to a close friend letting them know she's coming over. Her friend wasn't that close, but she decided to walk. As she locked the door to their shared apartment she debated texting Wilbur. She didnt want to, but she didnt want him to freak the fuck out because she wasnt home.

( Wilbur )

Me: Ill be back for the rest of my stuff tmrw.

[Read]

She closed her phone and started on her night time journey down the street trying to let everything from the past few weeks go with the cool wind.

Him on the other hand stayed silent. He had just finished his stream and had gotten a text saying that she'll be back for the rest of her things. This was inevitable, one of them had to leave, but to him it didnt seem right. He didn't want her to leave. Something in his heart was making him chase her back, the same thing in his heart that moved her into his apartment in the first place. Maybe it was love, maybe he wanted to persevere and have someone in his life. Something in his mind was telling him that he let go of something special.

Wilbue thought about it as he shut everything off and went to go grab his belongings, before rushing out the door to try and find her. Sadly to his discovery, she turned off her location. He finally made it to his car and started driving towards his house to see if she was around there.

He couldn't call a friend because she never introduced her friends to him. She did that on purpose because of him not doing the same. As he drove down the not so busy streets of Brighton he thought if he could get to know her, pull emotions and feelings out of her and see the real her. And if he cant do that? Who knows what will happen.

He remembers this face she always pulled when he always said "Im alright." She scrunched up her nose in annoyance and he always took it as a taunt because he couldn't figure out the real meaning. They were both going at this the wrong way, he dosent know anything about her and maybe thats the problem, but she needs to calm down as well. She needs to start paying attention to both of them instead of herself.

He was seated at a stoplight until he saw a figure on the sidewalk walking past him. The person looked shocked then kept walking, but even faster this time. He rolled down the window to see it was Y/n walking. Wilbur ran the red light and found a place to turn the car around to follow her. He drove a couple of feet in front of her before putting his hazard lights on and stepping out of the car to confront her.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" Wilbur said while getting our of his car.

"Im getting away from you. And what are you doing here?" She said.

"Well I could ask you the same thing. Its not safe out here alone." He calmed down a little. Wilbur's main goal was to get her back home so they can have a civilized talk. He didn't want to be out here.

"Oh? Ive been fine for the past fifteen minutes." She sasser back.

"That dosent mean its not safe!" He exclaimed.

She stayed quiet so that gave Wilbur an opportunity to speak.

"See, I want us to go home so we can have a civilized talk without feeling defensive. I want to get to know you, I know you're my girlfriend and yes, it was my mistake rushing things. Im not putting the blame all on myself either." He finished and she stayed quiet with her arms crossed infront of her chest.

"Are you cold-?"

"Fuck off...I mean it." She said while trying to pass hin on the street.

He stood in her way and he kept doing that every time she tried to get around him. Wilbur saw that she was getting annoyed at his actions. Wilbur held her by both of her biceps trying to hold her still so he could talk.

"You're being childish!"

"Fucking listen to me! You cant just keep walking away from us! From me! This is not healthy!" Wilbur yelled. He let go if her and surprisingly she stayed there.

"Get in the car." He ordered but she stayed silent. "Please get in the car."

She turns around gets in the passenger seat if Wilbur's car. He sighed a sigh if relief and followed her lead. They both got settled into the car and he didn't move. He wasn't going to drive unless she talked to him. After a minute if silence she spoke up.

"I know its- its both of our faults. And i have some things I need to work on. I cant just run away. Also your thoughts of me need to be rearranged, but I need to give you all of me. At leat 50 percent so we can start somewhere. But Im sorry." She said while she looked down at her lap maybe in embarrassment.

In the end they both wanted to fix themselves. In the end they wanted eachother. And they can both see that.

He leaned over the armrest and gave her a kiss on her cheek. She turned to him with a surprise look on her face, like this was the most affection he gave her, because it was true. She grabbed his hand that rested on the armrest too as he started to drive towards their home together.

As the nightly drive continues on and now shes drifting off in the passenger seat as In Love With An E-girl plays softly. She's left too tired to talk with Wilbur and be in touch with her emotions right now, but she'll do it for the both of them this time.

[freak60000]

Whats Revenants story?

ohhhh buckle up. buckle uppp. this ended up being like several lengthy paragraphs long im so sorry

OH MY GOD. okay. so basically

this regular 45 year old human guy presumably named kaleb cross was a renowned assassin that worked for the syndicate right. he was one of the best assassins ever. we dont know how exsctly this happened but one day he DIED (he told a story as to how he died, but that was later confirmed to be a fib) and that was very bad because the syndicate needed him to kill people (the syndicate’s intentions are Very questionable btw idk a whole lot about those guys). sooo they took his corpse and began experimenting to preserve his life, and “resurrect” him so they could keep using him. this took a LONG TIME like i think a few decades. until eventually the solution was the ”simulacrum” which is a human mind and conscience uploaded into a robot body. they stored and preserved his brain somewhere so he could continue to thinka nd function and all that. but theres a CATCH to this: he doesnt Know that hes a robot. he thinks hes just some regular guy doing his job and all. some programming makes it so his reflection appears as kaleb cross, in flesh and blood and all that rather than the freaky 7ft tall robot thing he was. and he thought this way for TWO HUNDRED YEARS (estimated 268? i cant remember). he went on to assassinatr people for TWO HUNDRED YEARS all while thinking he was still human. idk i think something in the programming made it seem normal to live that long or whatever. if not then im sure he was really comfused. and they replicated these bodies EXPONENTIALLY. theres like millions of these robot bodies and every time he gets killed he just gets uploaded to a new one, while STILL RETAINING the memory, pain and trauma suffered from the last one, including whatever way he had died. FUCKED UP RIGHT and he lived like this for more than 200 years. until ONE DAYY this guy took up a hit to kill this guy named Marcos Andrade. heavily guarded blah nlah blah he didnt care he KILLED that guy and his wife, but his 9 year old daughter escaped (she is VERY IMPORTANT. she would later grow up to be Loba Andrade who is a character in the roster set for revenge on revenant ^_^). but while he was killing and all that he got a piece of glass stuck through his neck. he saw it in his human reflection and pulled it out and LO AND BEHOLD his reflection glitched and he saw what he Actually was for all those years. overwhelmed with rage this mf set out to kill every last hammond robotics (the people who made him) employee and more, turning on them because thats what they had been using him for. and yeah hes been doing that ever since. he joined the games to get himself closer to the syndicate and hammond and to just “satiate his endless bloodlust” apparently. ok girl!

this part is explaining what has happened since joining the games and whats currently happened to the best of my ability. so loba right. he immediateky recognized her when she joined. she unsuccessfully tried to kill him for good, by locating his brain (the only way to Truly Kill Him besides the source code which i think are the same thing? i think???) but triggered a security protocol that made everything crumble. they ”teamed up” to find the source code again because tbh, revenant wanted OUTTT. at this point hes been living for 314 (correct me if im wrong) years in a body he HATES so tbh he wanted TO DIEEEEE. REALLY BAD. and this conflicted loba because she wanted him to pay and suffer for what he did. so she decided she was gonna send his source code away and Force him to live a forever life he didnt want to (IM SO PROUD OF HER). so he sought to kill everything Else she loved and make Her suffer which is what hes doing now. loba had a crush on bangalore but after rejection is rebounding to valkyrie, both of which revenant is toying with to make loba suffer. revenant says love LOSES. he also has beef with every single woman on the roster i think thats really funny

also theres ash who is another, newer simulacrum (who has vastly different programming that im not getting into), and after she ”woke up” and realized what she was, revenant tried to like. kill her? i think? to save her from that fate he suffered? but it didnt work LOL. and now they are like bickering siblings theyre so funny. they hate eachother so bad. he hates all the legends but takes interest in the ones he can toy with. example pathfinder, who is really really nice to him despite revenant being really really mean to him but pathfinder Insists on including and being his friend to the point revenant just finds it annoying and mildly entertaining. hes threatened to kill him but hasnt because it ”wouldnt be any fun”. love wins

he also has cool dark evil powers for some reason but we dont know where he got them (a writer said it would be explained via a future legend, but that hasnt happened and its been almost three years). also in another dimension he is king of the world. sooo

if you read this far i owe you money. i lovr you so much

[ringmyheart]

Can I request Vin Jin boyfriend headcanons and some fluff? (You don't have to force yourself)

(This and the other vin jin rq were merged!)

Honestly the way I see it, it doesn’t matter if you’re a very calm person or outgoing person. No matter what this relationship is gonna end up being considerably chaotic

He ropes you into everything he does. Doesn’t matter if u r a design student or an architecture student or if ur on the opposite side of the school from him, u r practically in his class. Dating him is like signing a contract sealing away ur own life bc he makes it a point to be ALWAYS w u

In class he doesn’t gaf if the teacher has ur seat on the other end of class, he is somehow finding a way to sit next to u against ur will or not. And when the teacher moves u two away from eachother INTENTIONALLY bc of this, he is threatening whoever happened to sit next to u to trade seats w him. He will go as far as to dress up as them to make it look like they’re them to be next to u and he’s so dramatic ab it.... being away from u felt like u were star crossed lovers whom the world was fiercely against

And if UR against this cuz ur tired of getting in trouble in class, or if you reject any of his advances, he’s gonna be really, really, really offended. He will at first sputter and be kinda shy and embarrassed about it, before he goes “fine! Have fun on your own without me, the greatest thing in your fucking life!”

He move seats back and will glare at you periodically every five minutes to pavlov dog you so that every five minutes every day, even when he’s not there, you feel the burning stare of vin jin

If you’re his s/o, he’ll buy you a matching pair of sunglasses so ur the freshest looking couple around Seoul (they’re hideous and thick but he thinks u look fly)

The glasses don’t have nearly as many layers as his does for himself so u can see, and u wonder how he managed to make them just as bulky and if he did it on purpose to sabotage u. Like “did u make my glasses purposefully ugly so no one else will want me?”

U have to dodge a punch after saying anything like that ab his fashion decisions LMAOAO

He’s rlly proud of u two matching. With the glasses and anything in general. He’ll make you wear a jacket matching his, or the same shoes and he will stop people in the hall and be like “wait. Notice anything cool ab us today?? Cooler than normal??”

And when they don’t respond he boasts “that’s right!! Me and my other half r matching. Look at us and weep, losers.” He thinks u two look so good....... if ur enthusiastic ab wearing matching things too he is elated u have to pray that tomorrow he won’t show up w another “if lost return to Vin Jin” “I’m Vin Jin” pair of jackets or anything of the like bc it happens SO OFTEN

And on the topic of sharing when it’s cold he likes to share jackets and blankets w u. Ur desks r moved by eachother by vin jin himself and u two share one blanket over u and shiver bc he just likes it, sharing w u plus he’s slightly warmer. And yes if you guys had indivizual blankets you would be warmer, but u guys have to struggle together he doesn’t care what anyone says (yes even ur protests ur sharing that one blanket wether he has to wrap it around u himself and tear up the one u brought on ur own or what”

He is so blind in love that he cannot tell when u guys suck at stuff. Like if ur in the wrong he doesnt care ur RIGHT and he’s taking that to the grave. He can belittle u and call u out but if someone else says ur in the wrong it’s on sight

Will die protecting ur name even when ur the one who was genuinely wrong

He forces u to make a beat for him to rap to. He loves rapping and wants to enjoy it w u, so ur forcefed YouTube videos of how to beatbox so u can be his bgm and eventually u probably just start to enjoy it to

And u always start a beat and he starts busting out rhymes and it’s SO BAD. It doesn’t matter if ur good at beatboxing if vin Jin is on the track w u it’s gonna sound terrible he brings the quality down immensely but u two just cannot tell

Like after a two session ur like “omg... that was so good. We should go pro?” “Fuck yea we should we’re better than those posers” “we could rlly make it in the industry fr” no u absolutely could not

During the school festival, u sang with him and it was SO bad. Half the crowd is gonna have 2 be hospitalized but u two had FUN up on the stage

Like I said, he has absolute faith in u. All u do is right. If ur driving a car for the first time, he is going to be ur little hype man doesn’t matter if u suck. U hit a curb and he went “YES babe!! Ur killing it cant wait till u hit the road bby” Ur not allowed to touch a car for the next two years now bc he kept cheering u on when u we’re doing CLEARLY wrong things

On a plane u r looking for the bathroom like pensively and u see a handle and look back and r like “is this it???” And vin jin thinking u r all righteous will go “yea babe go for it” and u open it and u depressurizate the cabin immediately

Now both on like 5 no fly lists

He loves to do things with u, like I mentioned earlier, and things he wouldn’t do alone he’ll do w u. Like drawing alone?? Boring. Drawing w Y/N??!!! Who knows what could happen..... so much fun could ensue. Maybe he will draw u cutely. Maybe he will draw u so ugly u will be forced to engage in a fight.

He likes to play just dance w u and compete for the “greats/all star!” Little titles above, and it becomes like a Friday night ritual for u two to turn just dance on and just go at it. But sometimes he’ll get too intense and suddenly he’s actually fighting for the chance to beat u. Will trip u so u lose on purpose

He makes u listen to him sing and rap to u. And u try to leave and he hugs tightly and is like LISTEN IFS FOR U, DONT BE UNGRATEFUL and now u have to listen

He makes u a mixtape of songs he made himself and they are all considerably worse than “remember the times we had”. It’s uploaded on SoundCloud and all the comments r hate and u listen to it a lot bc u know he loves u sm he made u a mixtape ya ur gonna play that but everyone else hates it w a passion

Like the comments r like:

Daniel: well.... it’s definitely a song 😅 I’m glad you love (y/n) so much!

Duke: he’s not making it out the hood 😐

Zach: never let this man in a studio AGAIN

Mary: this should’ve stayed in the CD

(Y/N): love it! 😍

Zoe: kill your producer 💀

Mira: ...

He’s overprotective too

If someone looks at u for more than a second he’ll go “what?? U think she is hot, huh? I’ll kick ur ass fucking perv.... cmon babe let’s go”

Will throw his arm around u and streer u the opposite way of any potentially good looking ppl to keep ur eyes on him

Oh Daniel is coming?? What a coincidence u and vin Jin suddenly have to turn the corner to the other way of ur classroom for some reason

Eli is near?!!! Oh no u just got milk spilt in ur eye!! Oh no now he has to wipe ur eyes and u two have to leave the cafeteria whatever will he do

It’s not that he doesn’t have faith in u, he doesn’t have faith in other men. Like he thinks they r all competition, and doesn’t doubt ur loyalty rather doubts how good he can b for u

WILL beat someone up for u. If someone smokes while ur around suddenly his fists r swinging at them cuz even if u smoke or vape urself no one else can get that stuff in ur lungs but YOU or HIM!!

If ur crossing the street and a car almost hits u, it’s the cars fault and he’s kicking the license plate and cursing it out for almost touching u “stupid fucking piece of metal”

Is the type of boyfriend to call u when he knows ur in an Uber and be like “babe u got ur gun w u right?? Oh don’t forget ur BOMB and ur MACHETE!! Yeah just left the house I killed some ppl nbd haha anyways HRU what’s ur Uber driver like” so the driver of ur car won’t even think ab kidnapping u. He has got ur back even when u do not want it

He doesn’t want u to see his eyes, so he’ll tell you to look away so he can take his glasses off and look at u in full color in all ur glory but he never tells u WHY he’s telling u to look away u think it’s a weird thing of his, or he’s insecure ab his face which is partially true but really he’s taking his glasses off and just looking at u. Adoringly.....

He hates PDA. He loves PDA. Do u see his dilemma

Like he loves PDA but doesn’t want anyone seeing him vulnerable even u.... so he’ll hold ur hand and be like “EWWW WHAT R U DOING GET YR HAND OFF MINE”

If u take the lead THATS best bc he can blame it on u and it’s ur fault he HAS to lock fingers w u cuz u did it to him first and he has an excuse to touch u and v like u started this im just sending u ur own energy back 😤

The type to be just like blind, overwhelmed in love. Always thinks ab u, always wants to be w u, worries ab u a lot and frets over u without showing it.... he hates it and loves it to death. Despises it but wouldn’t give it up for anything in the world

Eats lunch w u in the cafeteria and if u sit w someone else u r the ultimate traitor and he will trash talk u to hide his hurt to Mary the entire lunchtime. Kinda possessive.... wants u to also only think about him

WOULDNT EVER fight u for real. Play fights occur VERY often, like pillow fights, tripping ur foot when u say a joke insulting him, grabbing ur collar but he would sooner die than lay a finger on u

Verbal fights happen a lot and if he ever like LOSES it he may lash out and almost hit u and follow thru. I don’t think he’d be able to catch himself that quickly, and if he ever did he’d regret it for the rest of his life. Literally until the day dies he will take it to his grave

He may not sputter out apologieswill just look at u incredulously and then at his hands because what had he done? What did he just do? To you???????? (Y/n))))?????? His (y/n)??? Light of his life?

Will apologize probably over text or through a note or call, and if u don’t respond he is consumed by regret and tries to find u instantly like runs back to ur place

If u forgive him he feels bad still, because does he deserve it? And he might just isolate himself for a bit bc he can’t face u and if it left a scar he is dead inside. It kills him, literally

I could go on w this but I’ll probably save it for another separate pair of hcs later 😭

If u guys ever break up he will fight for u again and won’t stop till ur back together like flowers in ur locker every day, chocolate give during lunch, etc. He wont ever give up hope that he can win u over again and be w u again. He would keep trying, when he wakes up his first thought is ur name in a cold panic bc he can’t rest easy till ur his again and he will try and show off and poorly serenade u and trash his price and be corny and cheesy to get u back

Will set up a performance w the school to let him rap w a mic during lunch for u and he’s saying bars like “(read in bad rapping voice w inconsistent beat) (y/n), love of my life, uh, without you I’d die, uh. Please won’t you take me back? Yuh, without you ima have a heart attack. (Wha!). (Y/n), love of my life, yeah, without you I’m in strife, yup! Please be mine again, (babe), I can never rest till then.”

If the embarrassment doesn’t make u take him back so he’ll pls stop, and when he stands up on the lunch tables to do a little performance doesn’t do it either, then the odd sincerity of his voice and pain in his look (even tho while rapping he sticks out his lower lip in a weird pout) definitely, hopefully will

U make everything worth it !! Truly the light of his life

I hope these were what u wanted, I just had fun w them and wrote stuff that came off the top of my head when I thought of VJ!! ❤️

[ressyfaerie]

Dark Tyson fic; during G-Rev, Tyson snaps from stress and feelings of abandonment and joins Team BEGA. (Bonus points for Brooklyn getting close to Tyson to make Kai jealous. Black Dragoon optional, or maybe Boris gives him Black Dranzer...?!)

I saved the best for last. 

I am a big fan of dark Tyson- love it. I’ve been thinking of this prompt for DAYS. I’m very excited to write this- as you know I am the angst queen. For the sake of this fic, g-rev timelines are going to be confusingly switched around, just because it makes more sense for the fic, and also- I’ve forgotten some important plot points and dont have the time to rewatch g-rev LMAO. Anything in * can be Tyson’s or Kai’s private thoughts! 

So I finished writing this, and it's LONG. so I’ve actually uploaded it to archive first, because reading it on tumblr seems like a chore and a half, so here’s the archive link: 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30739397/chapters/75866906

It came out to 50 pages, and it’s 5 chapters on archive. 

And here’s the first ‘chapter’ of the fic: 

So here we go:

It was odd to see Kenny angry. 

He tossed his laptop to the side, picking up spare bey parts in his hand. 

“Kenny! I’m just saying- What are our chances? Without everyone else, we’re useless as a team-”

“I’ve been working so hard Tyson…” Kenny shook in anger, beside him. Hilary tried to place her hand on his shoulder to comfort him, but he shook her off. 

“How could you say we’re useless?! When we’ve been trying so hard!?” 

“It’s not enough! You know me and Diachi can’t work together-” 

From the corner of the room, Diachi screeched, “Hey loser! I’m right here!” 

“I know, you shitty little cherry tomato!” 

Hilary tried to be the mediator, “Tyson, are you sure that’s how you really feel?” 

Tyson nodded, “Our team has no hope. Now with BEGA taking over everything we can’t even get any parts, it’s useless-” 

“How could you say that Tyson!” Kenny yelled louder than he ever had in his life, “You’re the one who’s supposed to be uplifting us! You’re the leader-” 

“I don’t want to be a leader! We had a leader remember? And a coach?” 

“You can’t give up!” Kenny begged and shook with anger, Tyson felt horrible, he knew Kenny had been working so hard, but they had lost too much, he felt there was no hope of recovery. 

“Throw out your research Kenny, we’re done.” Tyson stared at the wooden floorboards of the dojo, completely defeated. 

“AaaaH!” Kenny had launched himself forward- landing a strong right hook on Tyson’s cheek. 

Tyson fell backwards, landing on his side and quickly sitting up to rub his cheek, “What the hell Kenny!?” 

Kenny was furious, “you can throw away everything we’ve worked for if you want! Telling me to throw away *my* research?! You need to get yourself together Tyson!” 

Tyson was left speechless, Hilary nodded, agreeing with Kenny, “if we’re going to defeat BEGA we need a Tyson who can hold himself together.” 

“You’re heads messed up dude,” Diachi remarked, “We can’t work with you until you fix yourself.” 

Tyson could feel the anger radiate through his body, “if you guys think I’m so messed up then maybe I should just leave!?” 

“Then go.” Kenny hissed through clenched teeth. 

“Fine! Good luck with hopper-” Tyson slammed his hands on the floor throwing himself to his feet, “Your beyblade that fucking hops- Beyblades aren’t supposed to hop Kenny!” 

He slid open the shoji doors fast, and threw them closed, rattling the old dojo like an earthquake. Outside in the gardens, he cursed. 

“Tyson?” 

Hearing his grandpa’s voice behind him, he aggressively swung his body in his direction, “What is it Gramps? I’m not in the mood-” 

“What’s going on with you and your friends?” 

“Friends!?” Tyson spat. 

“Oh no... Tyson-” Ryu shook his head. 

“What? What is it? Is it something wrong with me?” Tyson’s whole body was stationary, emanating white anger.

“Your friends didn’t leave you to hurt you.” 

“Not my friends- Friends don’t betray each other to go to different teams.” 

“You *know* they didn’t betray you.” 

“Then tell me why Kai went to BEGA.” 

Grandpa stayed silent, he didn’t have a good reason why Kai went to BEGA, and no one knew why. 

“I’m sure like Max and Ray, he just wanted to fight you again.” 

“And Hiro?” 

“He wanted to train stronger opponents for you-” 

Tyson suddenly laughed, “he could have trained *me*.” 

Ryu placed his hands in front of him, trying to calm his grandson down from a distance. 

His Grandpa was more serious than he had been in years. 

“He could have- I know it wasn’t the best thing for Hiro to do, but- he did it because he loves you.” 

“Okay Grandpa, you have an answer for everything huh? Then answer me this- where’s my dad?” 

The garden turned ice cold. 

“I’m sure he’s around Tyson-”

“Does he not have a TV? Or a post office? How can he sit in some country, and not see what is happening to his own son!?” Tyson’s voice bellowed through the courtyard. 

“I don’t know Tyson- he loves you.” 

“No he doesn’t- It seems no one does-” Tyson was holding back angry sobs. 

Ryu took a step forward, “Tyson I-” 

“No!” Tyson screamed and threw his hand in front of him to keep him back, “stay away from me!” 

The doors to the dojo opened, no doubt his make-shift team coming to see the commotion. 

“You guys stay away from me too!” Tyson grasped his head and scratched his nails into his scalp, “Everyone just- stay away from me.” 

No one could say anything, Tyson glanced around at the quiet group, “what? Are you guys afraid of me now or something?” 

“Tyson, you need to calm down-” Ryu tried. 

“No? Don’t tell me to calm down!-” Tyson took a step backwards, trying desperately to flee the situation, then it occurred to him- he could. 

Tyson stared down the gravel beneath his feet, the world felt blurry, and in that moment his vision flashed red, he turned away running at full pace through the yard, and out the gates, flying down the street as he heard his only paternal figure and teammates calling for him. 

Down the road, over a bridge, along the ocean, towards the river. 

The sun was setting now, twilight was blanketing the world. 

At the top of the riverbank he began to head towards the river, not knowing why. He slipped on the smooth grass landing on his back and groaning in pain. 

He placed his hands over his face and cried. 

He sobbed for everything- everything he lost, his friend’s, his reputation, his spirit. 

He pulled himself off the grass and shoved his head in between his knees, still crying. Anger, sadness, regret, he felt it all at once. It was eating him from the inside out.

He let out a frustrated scream while jabbing his fingertips into his biceps, trying desperately to turn to dust, to become one with the earth. 

He didn’t hear the footsteps approach him. 

“I would ask if you’re okay- but I know the answer.” 

“Whoever you are- Just leave me alone- please.” Tyson buried his head further into his knees. 

He felt someone sit beside him, the grass crunched under their weight.

“Everyone’s left you.” 

“I know that-” Tyson could barely make out the words. 

“They left you for better teams, brighter pastures… You must think you’re not good enough for them.”

Tyson shook his head. 

“You are. You’re better than all of them, probably better than all of them combined.” 

 Those words made Tyson perk his head up, wondering who his savior tonight could possibly be. 

The purple hair stood out first, he wore a compassionate smile. 

Tyson locked eyes with his arch-enemy but made no effort to change his expression.

 “You’re allowed to be sad- and angry.” 

Tyson became more frustrated, *why is it out of everyone I know, the evilest person tells me what I need to hear?*

Boris had an interesting voice. Tyson tried to dissect the tone, but he could only detect… Affection. 

“What are you going to do now… World champion?”

Tyson felt his body go numb at the comment, so much was expected of him, but he had no way of accomplishing any of it. 

Tyson tried to inhale before answering, a cough got stuck in his throat, and he answered in a hoarse voice, “I’m not sure.” 

Boris continued smiling, he stared at the orange sun, just about to disappear under the horizon, “Do you want to show your friends how capable you are?” 

Tyon managed to hold his head up for a moment, he slowly nodded. 

“Good for you.” 

His words seemed to calm him down against his will. 

Tyson mumbled, “I won’t join BEGA.”  

“I’m not asking you to. But I do have everything you need to arm yourself. Parts, training rooms, places to sleep, all the food you could ask for” 

Tyson shook his head. 

“No strings attached. Come see my training facilities tonight, if you don’t want to be there, you can leave.”  

Tyson felt cold, the shadow of the setting sun crept over them, an ominous darkness crawled over his face, then Boris’. 

“Or would you rather go back to your home tonight?” 

Boris made a point. Tyson had no intention of going home tonight, but he had nowhere to stay. 

His eyes darted back and forth, deep in thought. 

Boris pushed himself off the ground and stepped to the top of the hill. 

On the road next to them, a fancy car.  

The purple-haired man opened the passenger door and gestured with his hand. Tyson gave him a blank stare. 

“Come on, world champ.” He emphasized the last words just right- reminding Tyson how much was on his back, “what’ll it be?” 

Tyson’s brain wasn’t working, logical thought was too much to process. What he did know was- he didn’t want to sit on this riverbank crying the rest of the night. 

Boris waited, for minutes, holding the door open. 

Tyson sniffed, he rubbed his nose with his forearm, crawled to his knees, and pushed himself off the ground. 

“Good job, champion.” Boris grinned, giving him the unnecessary compliment. 

Tyon was beside him now, he rested his fingertips on the top of the car door, feeling the cold black metal under his nails. 

“It’ll be warmer inside when I turn on the heat,” Boris reassured Tyson, inspecting his skin, covered in goosebumps from the cold.

“O...kay…” 

Tyson crawled into the passenger seat weakly.

He did turn on the heat. The heated seats warmed Tyson’s whole body. He watched the street lamps roll past as he hunched into the leather. 

Boris drove like an old man- but also a maniac. Driving the speed limit, but taking turns at the same speed. 

The BEGA building towered over the whole city. They pulled into a parking garage, the gates rose with Boris’ presence. 

After parking in a special stall, Boris turned off the car and climbed out, he walked to Tyson’s side opening the door for him. Tyson didn’t have the energy to complain that he could have done it himself, and instead, followed the older man to a specific elevator. 

They rode the elevator in silence.

When the door opened, Boris walked ahead, Tyson followed cautiously. 

Inside another heavy metal door was darkness, Boris flicked a switch and the lights invaded the room. 

The room was filled with dirt and boulders, in the center, a beydish carved into the earth. 

 “This room was made to be destroyed,” Boris explained. 

Tyson pushed his hands into his pocket, caressing Dragoon with his hand. 

“You’re welcome to destroy it- if you’d like.” 

Tyson still felt emotion linger in his chest, the frustration was killing him, it was a tempting offer, but he knew if he wrecked his blade in the process, he had no way of fixing it. 

“I’m not recording, I’m not analyzing you, I’ll just step back. You do what you need to do.” 

Tyson pulled out his launcher and loaded Dragoon, he directed his launch to a rock.

“AAAUUGH!” Tyson roared as he put all his anger into letting go. 

Dragoon split the rock clean through with ease, the two halves crashing to the ground. 

Tyson continued to scream and throw his hands giving Dragoons orders at a lighting pace. The room was soon covered in dust from the obliterated rocks, while sand rolled over the floor. 

Tyson was holding his chest, trying to get air into his lungs with fast painful breaths, he realized the amount of air he needed wasn’t arriving, so he continued to destroy the room. 

After all the rocks were annihilated, he fell to his knees. He was out of tears, his eyes were wide open. As he witnessed the destroyed room under his body, Boris began to clap. 

“Bravo! Amazing, spectacular! A performance only one person in the whole world could accomplish!” 

Dragoon obediently arrived at Tyson’s knees, he picked him up and inspected him. 

*Trashed. I’m sorry Dragoon.*

He shoved him safely back into his pocket. 

“Fantastic job, Tyson.” Boris was in front of him now, holding out his hand to help him up. 

Tyson wanted to refuse, but his legs were like jelly, he grasped his hand using it as his crutch. 

“You must be thirsty after a performance like that! Come- I have a room prepared.” 

Tyson found himself in an extremely fancy penthouse. Extravagant food was laid out on a table with every kind of drink next to it. 

Boris had gestured to a couch telling him to sit down, when he did, the soft plush absorbed him. The comfort felt amazing on his aching muscles. 

“What do you want to drink, champion?” Boris popped open a wine bottle and poured himself a glass. 

Tyson watched him cautiously, he had never seen an adult drink alcohol so casually in front of him- he was underage after all. 

“Do you want some of this?” Boris gestured to his crystal glass and grinned. 

“No- Just water, thanks.” 

“Any food?” Boris asked as he handed him a glass of cold water from the table. 

Tyson accepted it and began to drink, he stopped for a moment, “not hungry.” 

“You’ve been through a lot tonight, that’s understandable.”

Tyson took another worried sip, “Yeah.” Tyson’s eyes darted side to side.

“You must be wondering about the room?” 

“Is this your place?” Tyson took a good look at the penthouse this time. 

“Actually, it was supposed to be yours, when I finally convinced you to join BEGA, but-” Boris took a sip of his wine, “it seems like that just isn’t going to happen.” 

Tyson felt a wave of exhaustion fall over him. He felt like he had been hit by a truck. 

“Let me show you around,” Boris suggested. 

Tyson decided to follow, he needed to get off the couch before he fell asleep. 

He showed him the kitchen, balcony, hot tub, fireplace, and finally the bedroom. 

“King Size bed, very comfortable, you can lay down if you want.” 

Tyson could sense his eyes closing, it had been a long day, he had never felt this tired, even after training all night. 

Boris sat on the edge of the bed, patting the spot beside him. Without questioning, Tyson was sitting beside him too. 

“It’s okay to rest sometimes. Have you ever seen a champion win on fumes?” 

“I have.” Tyson tried to grin, but failed. 

“Go to sleep Tyson.” 

“No- not here.” 

Boris took his empty water glass out of his hand- he gently pushed his shoulder, Tyson collapsed backwards into the bed. 

“Sleep.”

[tobebugjewce]

THE WALTEN FILES: my jumbled notes on my blind run-in with this web series

first off this is gonna be long and unorganized, also this is my second time writing this as i had lost literally half of my progress and im This (imagine two fingers almost touching with a 0.0000000001mm distance between them) close to ripping all of the fucking hair out of my goddamn head. but now this will be extra long and yes, i will lose some accuracy to my first writing but thats okay ill probably edit this a kajillion times over

which brings me to my next tangent; im literally braindumping here. so to have a smidge of organization all afterthoughts, edits and corrections will be boldened, i forgot what im gonna do with italicized text but ill probably bolden it here yeah im pretty sure its for side tangents, separate from Corrections, which are in bold. also theyre for emphasis too.

so in general, this post right here is all of my notes i wrote down on my grid-patterned sticky notes (which i used WAYYYY too much of) about the first 3 uploaded walten files youtube videos transferred onto my handy dandy digital notebook, this b(l)og. yeppers peppers. you know im serious about this shit when i typed probably over like a thousand fucking words including boldened shit, italicized shit and motherfucking links, lost it ALL, and im sitting here re-typing it again.

i feel bad about this but im not gonna trigger warn right here, but this is technically a warning. if you want a list of triggers as to what this post (and the walten files in general) i will link a little list to that here

without further a doo doo, (mama mia) here the fucking fuck we go again.

THE WALTEN FILES - VIDEO #1

clarifying this now, im gonna put some useless shit which i thought was code onto this because even though it was useless it was part of my notes and im physically going to combust if i dont put down every single thing i wrote on my papers. so what i thought was code was in the closed captions, i started writing it down when i got to the second video but came back to my first videos notes to include them. i wrote down the first letter to every word that was capitalized in the closed captions, which i had on as a default because number one i knew going into this id need them because most web horror things like args and cryptic shit like that has some of the most crucial shits in the closed captions. number two i am autistic and have auditory processing issues and have most closed captioning on as a default if theyre available.

firstly jotted, i wrote down the closed captions “code” so im gonna put the rest here too: HYWITB(BSI)Y A(BSI)BJWFKWITW ILHHFSBBSBTLBWI USOISTBNBSFIRBCAWHSHCBWHTAIGRNB*C*BTWLTSFA(20)MCFP ILITIIACPH(1978, 1979)SA(4)YTSCH*C*OGSSU SFTGRPATDBBUTFBNLLCHMIHLBRALLCLAYTUKB*LC*WHATWASTHATTHING 

the numbers in parenthesis are there because i wasnt sure they should be included in the “code” or not. i also thought of this with the BSI - bunny smiles incorporated and also the years 1978 and 1979. the shits in asterisks are coughs and light coughs, which were capitalized in the closed captions so i included them too just in case

i then jotted, in parenthesis of course, the names of the animatronics when they were listed in the animation section of the video; bon aka the blue bunny, sha aka the sheep one, boozoo aka the clown<3 honk<33, and banny aka the purpled eyelashed up one who is also a bunny btw. also i got boozoo the clown and boozoo the mustache guy confused because apparently the clowns name is billy???? but they named “boozoo” in bons sleepover and showed the clown? idk maybe im an idiot and theyre the same or just an idiot and theyre different or a super mega (matt and ryan?!?!??) idiot in general which is probably the case

i started drawing little stars to write down things i thought would be super important or to 100% look at again. the first subject of this pointy torture was the part of the video where at 3:00, i marked it down to make sure to reverse the audio as it was most definitely a weird audio that has that signature warp-y effect that makes sure you KNOW its in reverse. i then listened back to it Very carefully (still got it wrong) and got this: “you finally start to remember. that old doll. they will look out for you soon” im also pretty sure i heard “sophie” at the end of that audio but im not entirely sure and dont remember and i dont wanna go back to check lmfao but anyways it didnt matter because i was wrong anyway. after i had finished all 3 walten files i watched the film theory video on the walten files (which didnt cover all 3 but was dece.) out of curiosity and to hear matpats signature silly little voice explain some stuff i already knew, and click some shit in my brain that i couldve thought up of if i was a bit more... i dont know honestly. anyways yeah so the actual audio is “you finally start to remember. that old day. they will look out for you soon.” so yeah. day, not doll.

i then wrote down “sarah evelyn”, the name on the bons sleepover animation (i dont remember if she created it or animated it or whatnot) and scribbled will she matter? under her name. turns out no, as i didnt see her name in the rest of the series, let alone the first video. this is also a great time to mention how matpat theory helped me realize that the walten files are collections of videos, uploaded onto youtube by anthony. (i already knew about anthony as he signed his name in the descriptions of the youtube videos, making me categorize this overall web series more into an arg type genre.) but yes, the tapes, recorded “irl” footage, animated clips, vhs tape recordings and other audio-visual content is all collected and labeled the walten files, as i had mistaken each video to be a tape. stupid me. alrighty, onward!

i starred this one, good for me; MISSING: Jack Walten LAST SEEN: 06/11/1974

i jotted down with an arrow that; sophie was a nightguard? she was wearing the uniform explained in tape 2 i dont know why but i went back into my video 1 notes after i had watched video 2. organization purposes. i guess.?? 

i then paused the video when the screen flickered a date, the beginning of video footage dated 10/10/1982 (Brian Stells?) god my little genius ass assuming the videographer was brian stells, based on the id card i saw earlier.

i then wrote down what text i saw on the dead, mangled, bloody body in the purple security suit; “i cant feel anything” “he thought i was her” then drew a little arrow pointing to; thought brian was sophie? or ashley? i also starred the name Brian Stells this is totally out of order LMFAOOOOOOOO also i wrote down ashley because, again, my little pea brain went back on my video 1 notes after watching video 2. but yep thats all i wrote for The Walten Files 1 - Company Introductory Tape

THE WALTEN FILES - VIDEO #2 

Tape #1 - created 07/02/1978

awesome how thats first and foremost in the captions. god. so sexy of you martin walls. /j /nsx

this pack of notes is chunkier because again, like i have mentioned before i am an absolute goober and thought the capitalized letters of the words would actually mean something. I MEAN MAYBE THEY DO AND IM JUST DOING IT WRONG but i stopped doing it after this video because holy shit it was exhausting and my stupid little fingers couldnt take the writing anymore becasue i am WEAK. 

so write off the bat (squeak) i wrote down 197[] the blacked out rectangle over the last digit of that year and everything im also now assuming its probably 1978 or 1974 because lore reasons but whos to say but yeah i also wrote down this;

Tape #2 - created 08/13/1978

then, straight up in the beginning of the video i caught it, the flash of text, as i had by now realized i gotta be SUPER stupid focused on the screen in case i miss anything, i wanted to be crazy precise on my theorizing and mental notes, among other things. but yes i saw it, the first half of a youtube link;  “https://youtu” 

claps hands together and rubs them evilly. oh yeah baby. thats the hot lunch. this shit right here? the cats pajamas. lets fucking go.

i wrote down this goofy shit i pasued to inspect when i saw bon sorting through a file cabinet and naturally scribbled down the labels and other written things i could see on the files; 

relocate X/X/75 felix

storage K-9 07/23/1975 felix k(ranken)

Bons Burgers 06/28/1974 Jack Walten

Shipping Service 1975

New Location -> 1982

i also wrote down more goofy shit, like when banny was created for some reason; in 1974

starred, i noted to go back and reverse the audio at 5:09, when played back, i didnt write it down so i dont remember. lmao.

i also marked to screenshot and brighten the darkened image i saw at 5:20, i was going to do it on my phone then realized i can just do it on my computer so i quickly took a screenshot, brightened it and wrote down what i saw; a missing person poster that read MISSING: SUSAN WOODINGS(?) Last seen: 1974 i was very unsure of the spelling of her last name because the image was so goddamn low quality and grainy but its what i saw. this is where tape #3 gets thrown in, which im gonna type again because i like how the formatting looks;

Tape #3 - created 07/09/1978 (BEFORE tape 2?!//1/1??? its more likely than you think)

i wrote down more dates, any dates i saw, i jotted down. i wrote; 

Technical Support 1978 

then, 

Brian Stells (for some reason i dont remember right now)

alrighty this is where the stupid capitalized letters come in, but before it looks like i vomit a keysmash time infinity on this, ill put down the little inbetween things i wrote in the midst of the caps lockalypse like timestamps and stuff, so here you go;

- Reverse at 8:16 which i did but of course didnt write down what i heard. i think it was too warbled to hear anything clear out of it, or it was just the good ol auditory processing issues fucking me over yet again. WAIT yep yes i did here it is: “rosemary would go to the restaurant every night hoping that [her] beloved husband would reappear after being missing for weeks but no response until one day [s]he heard a voice [saying] ‘i know where he is rosie’ coming from the back stage” the bracketed stuff is the corrections, i misheard the audio and thought the audio said “his”, “he” and “singing” like a nimrod

- Brighten at 10:14 which was another missing person poster, but i dont think it had any information on it because i didnt write it down, just;

- Sophie again (pic at 9:08?) (dismemberd and put in Sha) i was stupid and wrong haha idiot it was rosemary who was put in sha but anywho

i starred and underlined a huge thing i discovered which was;

- Walten had 3 kids which i dont remember how i found out but it doesnt matter, its good important info i uncovered.

- Tape #4 - Unkown Date

- recorded 07/12-07/14 1978 

- Hilary B, Ashley P & Kevin W i made sure to get these names down as soon as i saw them on screen but then realized shortly after i wouldnt really need to have it as the closed captions made sure i knew which person was talking by using their first initial (capitalized of course) before each line of text. this is the perfect time to announce the arrival of the clusterfuck of capital letters, which is going to include colons which will indicate that the letter before it is the initial of the person talking. without further aedue, here comes another chinese earthquake;

TCWTSTATO(K-9)TBSSFWFCNEHAWBSUBIUC(BSIIDC)OWHISF INBIJTILNSPL(K-9)LCSCKCCCWTTLTLITTTYROTFAJAMHPYYSTCSPMBBWSBIB H:NTPPCCK:DA:HH:YCPRPMWTCBCRAWK:JH:SYYTCPBACPSTBAWCA:TK(?):FMTTCMK:TCPNOA:DTOFK:ITNPPRA:YBUTIRRFH:HKIBESRAIA:TCK:WA:WPCCFTRRIDPEH:GGK:GPA:LKK:WA:HNCGTKMK:YH:IGKA:ESK:MFH:RK:HILRLBNTRPPUWHITRRTPEIFEPH:YWBEBPK:MAHPBTRPTRPEL(LN)HTACPKLIKHPFITSKLTKLB(LB?)ISIBSUBIPRW AEBATHSPUAICTPURTWBBRPHTRTIIIILTCITCUCCP S(bpe, be)WA”IDCPBPSIB

holy shit its finally over okay now onto some MORE of what i wrote down in between and also after that keysmash attack;

12 doors? (backrooms) 27? 26? i was unsure because ashley was unsure too lmfao

found cassette (6/11/78) <- says “discard”? yeah it did

Tape in clown audio, speaking voice; jack, susan, charles(?), rosemary, sophie, last word sounds like “walrus” it was walten lmfao

Ashley died? yeah she did lmfao OR AT LEAST I THINK SO??

starred this one, Reverse @ 17:06, then got this;

“they left the next day, they thought ashley left early, but she was in the backdoors, screaming as much as she could, but no one heard the screams, the following days the caretakers would complain about an awful smell coming from the backdoors, company decided to shut down facility until new advice, the relocate project was unsuccessful. ashley is still there, but she is not screaming anymore, she saw something she wasnt supposed to see and now shes beautiful” the phrase “shes beautiful” was repeating like a bajillion times in that wall of text. then, god motherfuckng bless: 

at 17:23 i found the other half of the youtube link, “.be/k07QqEDOfQ” i pieced that bad boy together as instant as i think any form of ramen could never be, but remained ever patient. because i made sure to jot down this before moving onto my next segment;

@ end of vid 2, “shadow man sees* me when lights go off” im an idiot *it was actually “feeds” not “sees”, which AGAIN, i only found out after watching the stupid little film theory video *begins snarling and foaming at the mouth*

okay im not proud to admit im editing this to post it and realized ive lost my notes. well. 

might as well post what ive got! if i find my shit ill add onto this, i suppose.

[rvb-is-gay]

ok so now that the final episode of rvb0 is out for everyone, lets get into some discussion about it! please note that post isnt a topic of debate but rather just my personal thoughts about everything, so dont go arguing in the replies

(fair warning ahead of time for any fans, this is mostly criticism and negative feelings about it, so keep scrolling if you dont wanna read it)

When RVB0 was first announced, I remember everyone was first upset that the Reds and Blues weren't in it, including me. But now that I've watched the whole thing, I can say with confidence that my only issue with RVB0 isn't the lack of the Reds and Blues, but rather everything. the dialogue, some of the animation, the characters, the delivery, the pacing, the ridiculous amount of clichés, etc. I don't dislike RVB0 just because there's no Reds and Blues. I dislike it because I just found the entirety of it bad.

When I first started watching it, I went in with an open mind that maybe this season could actually be really good. I’d also be lying if I said that there wasn't a single scene that I liked. There were actually a few, but they still didn't make up for just the overall badness of the season. But please note that I don't blame the voice actors for any of this or even just Torrian Crawford for the season coming out a giant mess. Many people worked for this season and always had the opportunity to improve or change things but didn't. But anyways, let’s get into some of the criticisms I have for this season.

1. Smaller and more opinion oriented criticisms

This isn’t really criticism or anything important, but rather just a few things I found a bit weird to me personally.

First, the term “ragtag team of misfits” was used to describe Shatter Squad (and was even actually said out loud by One in the last episode, which sounded just so cliché and dumb in my opinion). I don't think this describes them at all?? Everyone has, at the very least, decent relationships with each other (save for One and East who were competitive with each other (which I also fucking hate in RVB that all the girl characters are always competitive with each other)), but that still doesn't really fit the term ragtag) and they all fight very well. I think ragtag fits the Reds and Blues more than it does Shatter Squad; they're bad at fighting, they argue and fight all the time, they're idiots, and that's why we love them. If they had just stuck with “a team of misfits”, that would've made more sense, but again, this is more of a personal opinion than genuine criticism.

Second, I don’t really like the aesthetics this season had. Everything felt a bit too neon and bright and then some stuff just felt like it came straight out of World of Warcraft or something. It didn’t really feel like RVB.

Third, my feelings about Carolina constantly calling Wash David can be summed up by what Michael said in the first episode of Halo 4 LASO: “Now we’re just gonna throw his name around all willy nilly. It used to be a secret.” When someone is called by their real name in RVB or just any story in general where everyone goes by code names, it’s usually a big deal and indicates something serious. Carolina wore out Wash’s name the first time she said it and it just got more and more irritating from then on out and lost its value.

Fourth, who was the blue and purple soldier in the first teaser we got? Was that One? Did they decide to change her armour colour? I don’t know, I just randomly remembered that and thought it was weird but I guess it must’ve just been a colour change.

Now, onto the more serious criticism.

2. Animation and dialogue

The second thing I wanna talk about is the animation. Don't get me wrong, the fighting animation is probably the best compared to everything else and it was pretty good to watch, but the talking and idle animations and gestures were..... kinda yikes. I know that it could be chalked up to “well we’re not used to seeing animated gestures since all of RVB usually has everyone just holding their gun and using the regular Halo models” but there were still some pretty bad parts.

Take the scene from Encounter at 3:26 as an example (I uploaded the scene to YT to put here, but obviously it was blocked for copyright):

This scene is probably one of the worst when it comes to not only the animations, but the dialogue, pacing, and delivery. When I first saw this, I honestly laughed. Here's a list of my problems with this scene and what made it so laughable:

The overexaggerated hand gestures. I get that because everyone's in armour and a helmet, it can be hard to show expression, but this feels like a bit much. Especially when One says “what? You’re pulling us off the mission? You cant do that!” I think that one scene in season 15 when Grif stays behind on Iris while everyone leaves and it slowly zooms in on Simmons’ visor somehow does a lot better at expressing feelings than this.

East immediately making the connection between Axel and Zero feels weird. I don't know if its just me who feels this way, but I think it should've been a little bit longer before she immediately is just like “you know Zero don't you”

Axel saying “I... I do... I did”  also sounds weird and like he was trying a bit too hard to sound dramatic. I don't really know how to describe it its just such a weird delivery of the line.

The way they all immediately start yelling at each other.

One saying “Axe, I trusted you” right after saying “tell us the truth”. Girl, you gave him no opportunity to explain and just immediately jumped to not trusting him anymore. Speaking of which, I don't think this was ever really mentioned again and had no meaning or importance to it.

The echoing of “I trusted you” also feels cliché to me, but this is more of a minor thing.

I think this one comment on one of the episodes on the RT site that says the dialogue “seemed acted rather than natural. It didn't really sound like how people normally talk, more how actors talk in plays” is how I feel about all of the dialogue in RVB0.

3. The villains

Zero and Diesel both felt like they didn't really have any motivation at all for being villains. Phase is probably the best when it comes to this. She was essentially abused by her father as a child and forced to undergo being experimented on. This is an actual good and understandable motivation.

Diesel we know basically nothing about, and then on the other hand, all Zero wants is power. But for what? Why? I can understand that power is a pretty common thing for people to want, but it still kind of felt like there wasn't really anything there.

Some previous good villains in RVB include:

Temple: Temple witnessed his best friend be brutally murdered right in front of him by 2 soldiers who didn't give a shit and just left him to die, especially right after he told him he was having a baby. Of course it’s understandable that he has a hatred of Freelancers after this. Any normal person would.

Felix: Felix was probably the best villain of all of RVB, to be honest (right beside the Director). He was just somehow so likeable and had so much personality, despite being an asshole. His ultimate motivation was money and being rich, which is another thing I can understand; the more money you have, the more you can essentially do whatever you want and live in luxury. I mean, even so many people in real life do horrible things just for money. I don't even have to give examples for this. Felix in general is also just a psychopath.

The Director: The whole reason the Director did what he did was because he lost the person he loved most in the world: his wife. He was willing to do literally anything to bring her back, leading to all of his actions in the Project Freelancer saga. You can find many examples of movie/TV/book/etc characters/villains seeking vengeance as a result of loss of a loved one and grief. Despite being a horrible person, the Director actually managed to be a villain you could even sympathize with, making him even better.

Sharkface: Although a bit of a more minor villain, similar to Temple, Sharkface is a villain because he wants revenge on the people that killed his team, the people he considered to be the only family he’s ever had.

4. Tucker & the swords

The fourth thing I wanna talk about is the whole thing with Tucker and the swords. I always found it kinda weird how both Tuckers sword and now Locus’ sword in the chorus trilogy were the same, but then in RVB0, Zero’s sword looks and acts completely different, but that might just be a little nitpick of mine.

As for Tucker, it was so good to see him. Although I don’t know if it was just me, but he seemed a little OOC. What I didn't like about seeing Tucker again was that he did literally nothing the entire episode. He was useless. He said “I can fight” at one point but then all he does during the battle is get held at knife point, run away, and then get stabbed and have his sword taken. Tucker isn't an amazing fighter, but he’s definitely a lot more capable than just this. We’ve seen him in action many times and I just feel like he could've done a bit more. It almost feels like he was purposefully nerfed and tossed aside just to advance the plot.

Another thing that I and probably a lot of people are upset about is the fact that Tucker might not even own his sword anymore?? When East stabbed him, he apparently died and the sword was rebound to Phase, but it wasn't very clear that this was the case. Although the beginning of the next episode starts with hospital beeps and a flatline, I don't think it was still really clear enough that Tucker actually died long enough for Phase to reclaim the sword because I saw a handful of people confused in the comments and, like me, even thought it was just bad writing at first and that the writers completely forgot about the rules of the sword established over several prior seasons.

When in the hospital, Wash tells Tucker that he almost died. Although I actually liked this scene because it was nice to see wash and tucker bantering again, I think it could've been made better and made the plot clearer if instead of saying he almost died, Wash said something along the lines of “Tucker, you died. Your heart stopped, but they were able to bring you back thanks to their advanced medical tech” and then in response Tucker freaks out because that means his sword will now work for Phase and now they know how urgent the situation is.

I really really hate that Phase just has Tucker’s sword now and nothing is even said about it. If Tucker was to give his sword away to someone, I think many people would prefer that it was at least someone close to him, like Junior for example, but instead it goes to a random girl he hardly knows.

5. Pacing

The fifth thing I wanna talk about is the pacing. This season was definitely a lot shorter than normal and I think that’s one of the things that really prevented it from being good. The entire story just feels rushed and while I understand that it can be really difficult to build a good story and characters in such a short time, I think there’s still ways you can do it without it feeling like there’s so much missing. I think the long intros and outros are also responsible for less time and maybe they should’ve considered cutting them to give more actual episode time. Here’s a few things that were poorly done as a result of bad pacing:

The final battle against Zero: The whole battle just somehow felt like a typical video game boss battle that ends super quickly to me. Shatter Squad didn’t even defeat Zero, he just up and got disintegrated or whatever from Black Lotus.

Shatter Squad giving up on their mission: After receiving the silly deep voice filtered message from Zero, everyone on Shatter Squad just immediately gives up on finding him.

One’s speech: One’s speech wasn’t awful or anything and I didn’t really have any problems with the speech itself, but rather just how quickly the team went from “we can’t do it.. it’s over..” to “you’re right! I’m in! Let’s go get them!” Compare this to Doc and Sarge’s speech to the Reds and Blues after Church and Carolina leave in season 10 episode 20. It just felt a lot more genuine (this is probably because the Reds and Blues had a lot more time to be developed, though) and was only given after some time passed rather than 2 seconds later. The scene and context also transitioned well into it and at first, nobody was on board with what Doc was saying, which is more realistic in my opinion. People’s minds won’t just instantly change, they’re still gonna think about it and maybe have a few doubts at first.

Phase and West: During their fight, West talked a lot about how he regrets giving Phase away to Starlight, that he won’t hurt her, and is even willing to die for her. Their scene together ends with Phase punching him in the head and then leaving to join the others and nothing else about them is mentioned. We don’t know if Phase forgave him or not, we don’t know how West feels, etc.

Tucker’s sword: Phase still has Tucker’s sword and like the scenario with West, nothing about it is mentioned. We don’t know what she’s going to do with it, if she’s going to keep it, if Tucker’s gonna do anything about it, etc.

6. Clichés

Clichés aren’t inherently bad and can be really impactful and good if done right. But when it comes to RVB0, it’s jampacked with clichés that aren’t good. Here are a few examples:

Everyone gives up until a speech is given: All of the points for this are the same as above, but I wanted to include this scene as a cliché as well.

Every female character is competitive with each other: RVB falls into this a lot, like I mentioned earlier. It happens again with East and One, although luckily they seem to resolve it, but not until literally the end of the season.

West’s fit about East: All of the lines and delivery in this scene were just atrocious and cheesy. I think West’s dialogue just could’ve been a bit more original, but instead we’re given this boring predictable “I won’t lay a hand on her. I promised her. I promised her mother. I promised she’d be safe” spiel that has no emotion to it in his voice.

The whole “I got this, you go ahead” thing: This isn’t like a super cliché thing, but I found it pretty interesting how it happens twice in the same episode.

I think this is pretty much all I can think of at the moment. If I think of anything else, I’ll add onto this. Overall, I think RVB0 would’ve done a lot better as just an RVB spinoff so that it could have more episodes and seasons dedicated to developing characters and a good plot. I’m really disappointed with this season and I hope whatever comes next is better than what RVB0 was. I hope the team that worked on it can learn a few things that come from the good and valid constructive criticism given to them. And if I had to pick, I think I’d say Raymond was my favourite out of all the new characters. He just felt the most relatable and realistic to me.

[bang-me-bangtan-style]

07 YOUR’E MINE P.2 JJK

Masterlist || 01 || 02 || 03 || 04 - finale

paring: JUNGKOOK x READER

genre: smut , short series, noona kink, noona stuff

word count: 1.5k

summary: being Yoongi’s younger sister means you've been around a lot. it didn't take long for the boys to fall for your charms. however the youngest member has taking a liking to you. except you dont date younger boys. or so you thought?

notes: this contains smut and use of bad language. you've been warned.

"Really?" Yoongi was in your ear as we traveled back to our hotel." Your not going to apologize?"

Taehyung was walking next to you and he pulled his lips back forming them into a rectangle- his eyes bugging out his head as yoongi started another fight with you.

He continued to walk beside you the other boys head of you three walking towards the van trying to stay out of sight from the LA fans.

"I will," you nonchalantly said.

"When," he growled.

"leave me the fuck alone Yoongi!"

Jin who was in front of you three turned around and looked back and then forward.

You signed and purposely went around the other side of Taehyung. But that didn't stop Yoongi he talked over Taehyung to get to you. Taehyung feeling awkward in the middle.

"No I won't leave you alone until you get your shit together and quit taking your anger out on everyone. He looked at Taehyung. " didn't you get mad at Taehyung last week for accidentally tripping you on the plane?"

You looked at Taehyung and he averted his gaze not saying a word trying to stay out of it not trying to anger you and not trying to anger his hyung by not being on his side. He was lost for words, he didn't want to imply-

"And i apologized, you said looking at Taehyung. Taehyung quickly nodded.

Finally the van came into view and you guys spilled in. Everyone got in and you had to go to the back and guess who was in the back?

Jungkook.

Fuck.

He was back there with Jimin and the seat next to Jungkook was empty. Yoongi who was at the door of the van and the next row in front of Jungkook's grabbed you before you got back there and gave you a warning look.

You furred your eyebrows together and snatched your hand and sat next to his "Golden Maknae" still not apologizing and sitting there annoyed not at him but at Yoongi.

Jungkook sat there in the middle of you and Jimin stiff as a board he held his breath as if he was afraid to breathe around you because anything seemed to a problem with you. You were hard to please, never satisfied.

You looked out the window and let the driver take you guys to the hotel. Yoongi had fallen asleep and the very front of the big van was in conversation with another. Trying to ease up the tension.

"Now would be a good time to apologize," you thought. " but nahhhhhhhh."

--------

It has been a few days since the whole blow up with you, Jungkook. and yoongi. Still jungkook wouldn't look at you and you could tell he was losing sleep over it. Plus today he did bad at the LA concert today he messed up a couple times and when his face showed on the big screen he had visible bags under his eyes.

Yoongi, seemed upset and it was because of you.

Everything was.

When the show ended and Yoongi stormed to the back of the stage first- the rest of Bangtan waving the fans goodbye. He was trying to get to the back as fast as he could to get to get to you he walked a whole five minutes down the stairs down the hallway to get to where you were in the tech room watching the whole show.

He busted through the tech room door. Everyone in there including you looking up.

"Thank you everyone had a great time, the vibe of bangtan was horrible! Everyone is in their feelings because Jungkook isn't doing well," he clapped ," well done sis," he screamed and some of the techs left leaving you two alone seeing as it was a brother sister feud going on they felt like it wasn't their place to listen even if it was about one the other members.

"He messed up five times tonight he has too much on his mind and you're at fault!"

You looked up from the couch and looked at the screen that no longer displayed the boys anymore and the ongoing concert- but instead the band logo instead.

"You know what I don't want you on our next tour! if I could I'd send your ass home right now!" he screamed in your face- you not reacting- and jhope came in at the right time to grab him from you.

Jhope knew he was upset that's why he came to check on him and you because he knew he'd blame you for jungkooks performance today. He knew that the show was bad and hoped the fans didn't notice that all of bangtan was kind of off. Even if they didn't- the seven boys could feel it within the group. Very off

You got up and Yoongi grabbed you "let me go!" he said yelling at Jhope."

You pulled away from him, him pulling away from jhope- and Namjoon rushed in, some of the others rushing in as well.

"Everyone stop!" Jhope, Namjoon, and Jin looked towards the door.

There Jungkook was: looking even more tired in person, the screen airbrushed him to make a believable happiness. But the frown on his face showed that wasn't the case. He was tired and he didn't want Yoongi and his Noona to fight anymore.

"I'm fine," he said looking straight at you and he left.

Everyone looked at the door as it slowly closed and everyone let go of each other.

Jhope going after Jungkook to see if he was okay. Yoongi glared at you. "you're my sister but fuck you," finally he gotten what he wanted a reaction from you and you looked taken aback not thinking he was going to say that to you.

this was the first time he cursed at you like that.

He left leaving you with Jin and Namjoon. Jin squeezed your shoulder and Namjoon looked at you not knowing what to say. Especially since tears were rimming your eyes.

All you did know was he was right, you wish you could change, you didn't mean to be this way you just didn't know how to handle your emotions you were an emotional wreck and your were so destructive you destroyed everything around you.

especially jungkook.

Finally the rest of the day no one said anything. Everyone didn't want to talk it had been a bad week enough and the concert that just past wasn't a good one everyone lost focus and jungkook wasn't there. He was physically, but mentally he wasn't.

You were all in the van again you were in the back next to Namjoon and Taehyung. Jungkook seemed to find it every way possible to stay away from you. He was now avoiding you. And you felt bad. You had cried in the bathroom about it when the car stopped at a rest stop. You guys were traveling 2 hours for the next concert that was in 3 days.

You cried because you let it go this far and you cried because of the text you had gotten from jiyong.

leave me the fuck alone will you?

he had finally replied to the thousand of texts you had sent him and this was all you got.

it was the right timing too. After all the problems you were having with the boys. But it was all your own fault. Hell maybe jiyong cheating on you was also your own fault as well. You seemed to destroy everything you touched.

well I hope your happy with her. you replied.

you didn't know why you said that but you did to bask in the pain some more showing that it didn't bother you that much but you knew it did. The girl jiyong cheated on you with was your best friend. And she was forever cut off. She even had the nerve to try and explain to you that she was sorry and a whole bunch of other shit but you didn't bother. It was betrayal and you didn't get betrayed. At least you denied it.

You were the bitch, Queen bitch nothing bothered you right? You were fine at all times never cracked  pressure never got played you played guys- right? A girl like you never batted an eyelash and just kept going so what the fuck was wrong with you?

You threw your phone down on the bathroom floor and cried until staff came and got you because it was time to move. You wiped your eyes and threw up your hard exterior. the " im Y/N , and im a bitch" exterior. That facade was beautiful. A beautiful disaster.

~

PART 03 ||

A/N: tell me why i had all these parts save and never uploaded them lmao my bad for everyone that wanted to read the rest of this smut lmaoooooooo

[nobody-knose--archive]

this is about the worst time for me to make a liveblog but. fuck it rickshaw stop concert liveblog

-coming in just at the end of wtth, red went too early with the operatic stuff and andrew just went ham on the keyboard. he did vocals once or twice too! hell yeah

-the bidding next? the bidding next. havent looked at the whole setlist yet but oh boy. someone fix their microphones they are too quiet

-hey damn dramatic lighting alright

-that’s a hella wonky synth sound youve got going on what’s up with that, liking the good work andrew

-zubin i beg of you. where have your eyes gone. now i want to see eldritch zubin. goddam it emo boi

-those are the most synthed trumpets ive ever heard hoo boy

-mics could really really be better zubin’s so quiet compared to the others. and andrew’s singing‽ i couldnt even hear him!

-piano’s good and audible though and that’s always swell

-hello to you t- oh we’re going straight into misery fell of all songs? sure as hell wasnt expecting that from a 2008 show without vests

-i suppose the banter mightve just been cut out there are some clear cuts in this upload

-wonderful shot of eldritch zubin here

-wasnt expecting the flute synth but go off andy

-interesting camera angles! twists and turns and closeups i like it, would prefer more than background ross in the zubin shots

-wonder why they clearly do a tralalalala instead of a lalala here but not in the album version. i understand cutting out the call-and-response but the tralala seems perfectly reasonable to me

-woo blurry ross shot kick it good man!

-red’s face is really interesting to look at the way he enunciates everything and bobs his head as he does it. idk maybe it’s just the focal part of the shot but it’s a real sight to behold

-whoo instrument change? haiku? wait there’s a tambourine... &? introductions are nice? oh wait “you’re hot” “i’m too much, or not enough”. huh

-dramatic fade-ins lovely just what we need. didnt really expect to get acoustic guitar on this song out of all of them. it hasnt got that for the studio version has it?

-wait a minute how long has red been sitting on the floor. this isnt praise you dude get up. are you just going to stay there? i mean i wont stop you

-kinda liking the spotlight on rob

-oh there’s red coming up for the chorus with his electric guitar. fucker

-in general are these cameras dirty? everything’s slightly smudged

-oooh hell yeah synth solo kick it andy didnt see that coming overpower that guitar wahoo

-exactly one second of zubin’s banana bass baddiggle jiggle, rewind another second, and then into banana man we go. hold on all the tags where i called zubin’s bass dance his badiggle jiggle havent come out yet. well you guys can get context in like 3 weeks dont worry

-you’ll get. a lot of stuff in 3 weeks. like multiple weeks of pure tally hall queue content. i’m so sorry

-i didnt know rob straight up would be playing a bongo in this one, a maraca of some kind’s normal but not a full on drum. still go Off man slap that drum hell yes

-i’m going to say the same about ross hit those gotdam drums you’re killing it bro

-quick lil leap for the mic for a “wheee” i like that

-red’s taking on a slightly different accent for this chunk. not sure how to feel about that

-oh now i cant hear his voice. lovelyyyy

-KICK IT ROSS

-& ANDY

-& ZUBIN & ROB HELL YEAH YOURE DOING AMAZING SWEETIES

-preemptive clapping? is this crowd new to tally hall? they did introduce themselves a bit earlier

-i wonder how it feels to be a tally and know you’ll never be as good a whistler as bora karaca

-seriously zubin’s more audible than red here

-oh they are doing praise you! time to put the emo hair on full exhibition. hang on zubin’s turned away from the audience and rob’s putting something in his ear is there something wrong darlings

-good lord i need to stop calling people darling i called my goddam older brother darling earlier today this is a disaster it’s getting too late for this shit

-wait a minute i can almost mostly see zubin’s eyes cool. anyway time for rob to ruin his wrists roughing up a tambourine

-wait red’s taking over? come on zubin youre better than this. actually he’s looking kinda sweaty you can sit this one out actually

-snapping too that one’s new. i think. havent seen too many recordings of this.

-and now it’s being handed off to rob! who’s next, andy? god i hope so

-boi pleaese your hands they must be hurting i beg of you robert give your wrists a break

-zub absolutely groovin it up over here. as he should. shame his eyes are gone though

-is that andy on the high harmonies? because not only are the others doing their vocalises but their mic is absolutely not picking them up well enough for it to be them. good for him, didnt know he had the range

-hell yeah kick it dude

-what is rob singing here? actually i dont care ignore that. i could listen to the original song or another recording or read the lyrics but i actually do not care at all

-is the room bathed in blue because it’s zubin’s color? that’d be rad

-GO HAM BOYSSSS. Hit that vibraslap, Smack that tambourine, Groove on that piano, Get Movin on those drums, Shake that whatever it is, let’s fucknig goooo

-epic catch of the tambourine i love these men

-seriously though ross does such a good job on this

-i cant say ive ever understood the lil crouch move they make at the end of this. assuming it’s a reference to something, like a performance of the original song, because otherwise i think someone else wouldve pointed it out by now

-there’s still 2 more songs, oh but considering the big change from that cut i’m assuming there mightve been a quick break in between, zubin drinking and red with an acoustic guitar & all

-this fukcer’s cheekbones will be the death of me. i know this makes me sound h*rny but from an aesthetic point of view theyre just so defined and make up so much of his facial structure i just cant. comprehend them idk they always catch my attention. i think i’m too tired for this

-ross’s performance in this song is terribly underrated he’s so damn good he needs more respect

-is it just the camera angle or is zubin way separated from the others?

-ive actually more or less figured out the major roaming bassline you know and love/the trickling harp part for the piano. the problem was the sheet music i used to figure it out was a whole band arrangement, so i had to mentally transpose some like clarinet & french horn parts into normal to know how to play them. and that’s why i think we’re not going to cover that one any time soon

-it had like 9 parts seriously we cant play it based on that sheet music and unless someone knows some quick easy and free transposition software i am not doing that whole song

-like please. can i get piano sheet music for the piano part of this song. i dont want to deal with flute and clarinet and trumpet and tuba please

-that’s andy on the mr moon isnt it? red’s voice is distincly separate and he’s done it before for live performances though i think it’s red’s voice for the studio recording. he sounds good

-hmm. a c# e d f# a e g# e d f# a a c# e d f# a b (no wait let me check something) g# e f d b a yeah that’s right

-please! if you’re going to show me andy vocals let me hear andy vocals i love his voice

-i love zubin too but he shouldnt be the loudest guy here. at least i can enjoy ross’s drum mastery

-wh theyre not going to do the lil acoustic outro? aw man. well on to the last song

-yeah these guys have got to be new. oh to be someone who’s never heard tally hall before and to come to a show and see 5 guys in colorful ties play a wide variety of rocklike songs and then hear them say theyve got a cd on april first and an internet show around the same time. oh to be even older than i am now the year my little brother was born

-it’s getting late i need to wrap this up

-shit who was the band from the boralogues that did tap dancing. i dont remember

-according to a commentor a ross drum flip from the boralogues is also in this but i didnt notice

-heyy different lyrics for turn the lights off. “turn the toners” is that what they said? i need to shut up and listen

-for the longest time i thought it was “and everybody wants to get eaten tonight” which i think makes about as much sense as wanting to get evil but it carries v*re connotations and we all know how tally hall feels about vore

-i have such a hard time differentiating zubin’s voice i didnt even notice he sings this verse goddam it

-man i really wish i could hear whatever the hell andy’s doing better

-there he is! i bet i could learn that riff if i tried hard enough

-i know rob’s not exactly meant to be heard well hear but hey i enjoy hearing whatever affirming actually positive major key stuff he has to say at these liveshows get up and close with that mic man

-couldnt care less what red’s saying though

-”nights pAST iN” best microphone quality of the whole night 10/10 yep it’s still 10/10 i can still make that joke hell yes

-this song does have strong red & blue vibes actually

-if andy isnt singing here i swear to god

-”sleepy child” haha that’s me

-love that effect at the end. i should do the same right now immediately. good night. thank you!

[yehetting]

Loco & Jay Park - Reaction

kanekilover23 requested: “Hello, can I request a reaction pf Loco and Jay Park when the reader is a youtuber and does the breakup prank on them. Thank you.”

omg haha sorry its so late, here ya go love!

Loco:

He would love having a s/o as a youtuber! Always making fun videos, going to new places recommended by your subscribers. The whole experience was something he never knew he would love so much. That’s until prank season trends came around, he didn’t know that was a thing so it kind of made it easier to get him so good and easily. unfortunately the main trend was fake breaking up with their s/o. You set up different cameras around the living room, to try and get different angles. You had a script ready and everything. Once he came home you pretended to be annoyed already and acted like you where editing another video. He came up and tried to rub your shoulders to help you relax but you shrugged him off telling him to leave you alone. He backed off and went to the room and put his stuff away. When he came back you had added fake tears and pretended like you where crying over “losing all your work”, he ran over to see what was wrong and you said what happened. He tried to hold you but you pushed him off, which made him a little upset. “its okay you can record it again or think of another topic.” he tried to reason. “I cant just ‘record it again’ it was one of my biggest projects I've been working on it for weeks!” You shot back trying not to really cry seeing his face. “Well, I'm sorry, I know how that feels, what can i do to help?” he asked genuinely trying to help. “Nothing, i cant do anything this is something I've been so passionate about and now its gone and all you said was i can record it over or think of a new topic, you knew how much this meant to me and your literally telling me right now that it can just be rerecorded? I cant believe this.” You tried to be as convincing as possible but it was starting to get hard seeing how upset he was actually getting. “I didn't mean it like that, I was just trying to make you fell better..” he said standing up this time and looking down at you. “Are you serious? You are aren't you. I cant do this.” you said standing and starting to walk to the door. “Do what? Where are you going?” he asked realizing you where walking to the front door. “I'm leaving, ill be back in a few days to get my things, you just told me you where trying to make me feel better by putting down all my hard work. I cant be with someone like that I'm sorry.” you put on your shoes and started to open the door when you heard a sniffle. You instantly regretted all of it and just stood there. You turned to see him crying staring at his feet. You felt like shit right then. You had no idea how to tell him it was prank, this was a bad idea. “I'm so sorry....” you whispered real tears coming out. “For what?” he asked so lost at this point. “This was supposed to be a break up prank but I let it get out of hand I'm so so fucking sorry...” You broke and started to cry harder. “What? are you serious?” he asked leaning back and looking at you hard. You just nodded. You pointed at the cameras around the living room. He looked at them all/ in shock. You explained the whole idea and how it got too far when you started to see him cry and how you feel like such an ass. “I really don't expect you to forgive me for this, I'm just really sorry. You said deleting all the footage off the cameras. “no yeah I'm really pissed off right now, ill get over it just please let me be for a little bit, ill come to you when I'm fine.” you nodded and he went into the home gym. He came out sweaty and red from being in there. “hey, so I thought about it and I'm okay with it now, it was a good prank but I wish this wasn't the trend right now. I forgive you.” he said and you smiled. “but to seal the deal you have to give me a hug right now.” he said smiling and holding his arms out for you. You made a gagging face because he was all sweaty but you manned up and gave him a hug. It felt nice despite the sweat. He kissed your cheek. “i love you but don't do that to me every again please. I hated the thought of you leaving me.” he said pain still in his voice. “I wont I promise.” you said kissing him. 

Jay:

He didn't care for the whole youtuber thing like loco did, He did however support anything you did and wanted to help anytime you asked. Needed a kick ass intro and outro song, he was on it and sold you the rights, for kisses, so whenever someone uses it they get copyright claimed. you liked being on the other side of that for a change. He helped with editing sometimes when you're too tired. Having him help you when you needed had its downsides though. He would opt out of the Boyfriend tags trends, because they would “tarnish his bad boy rep” *throws up dumb gang signs* You would laugh it off but that meant you had to do something else and endure the drop in views. You wanted to get back at him for some of it an guess what it was? Break Up prank trend time! Same as loco you set up cams all over his office when he went out to get you some snacks for the movie date you had planned. One was by his computer, his couch behind him and one was placed carefully in-between two of his sound systems. You sat in the living room trying to look pissed off. You seemed pretty convincing because once he stepped into the room he asked what was wrong. You lied and said you saw his emails while cleaning up and saw that he was expected to work tonight. He said that he didn't see it but that he could most likely get out of it. You threw your hands up and followed him to his office where he went to look at the fake email you got his manager to send for you. “I swear its like every time we’re supposed to have alone time you have to work.” you said behind him. He turned and looked at you. “Yeah but, i usually get out of it for us.” he replied still looking at you. “can you this time? you just got off tour! You cant possibly have work already?” you asked pretending to get more annoyed. “I shouldn't ill email him back.” he sat down and started typing away. You riped out your phone and texted his manager about what to do before he hit send on the email. You two sat in silence for a few minutes he tried to reach for your hand a couple times too but you brushed him off. The computer dinged signaling he had a new email. He read it and set his head fell and he sighed. You knew what it said because you basically wrote it. “Seriously?! You're joking right? You just got home!” you got louder. He turned his head to you looking sorry. “I cant help what they do, I'm sorry.” he said trying to reach for you. “I don't care, you just got home this isn't fair to you or me....I don't think I can do this... you work all the time, it feels like i hardly see you.” you said quieter not trying to sound as mean as it did, because you know damn well has always there for you. “I... no I can try to get out of it, Please.. I know its not fair, Its my body their messing with and our relationship.” he got up to move closer but you backed away. “I'm gonna go, ill be at my friends, ill get my stuff in a few days. If I knew this about your company I wouldn't even have said yes to that first date.” Your eyes closed because holy shit you shouldn't have said that. His arm dropped to his side. You backed out of the room and down the hall a little bit. Gaining the courage to go back in. He looked up at you when you came back in. “I.... this was supposed to be a harmless prank but i think I went too far... I'm so sorry jay...” you whispered and let your head hang. You felt warmth and looked up to see him holing you like you would disappear. “what the hell is wrong with you? Please don't ever do something like that again!” he got loud this time pulling away from you. You nodded tears forming. “I promise, Ill delete the footage too.” you said nodding at the cameras. He looked shook, he looked and saw them all. “This was recorded?” he asked. You nodded. “for you channel?” you nodded again. “Please post it! Dude that'll go viral!” Your eyes widened. “What?!” you asked. “I'm serious! If you do you might get scouted for an actress with that amazing acting you did.” he laughed waving at all the cameras. You uploaded it a week later and sure enough it went viral! You got an offer from his company as a commercial actress. 

( I DONT OWN THESE GIFS, CREDIT TO OWNERS )

[jazzman-19-blog]

Crazy Little Thing Called Life

*Got gif from Google, if this is yours, tell me and I’ll credit you!*

A/N: Ok so this one was alotttttttt. But it was also fun to write? i dont even know but yeah. I was suppose to upload this yesterday but I’m lazy so I didn’t. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter! BYEEEE :]

~with lots of love, Jazzman~

Summary: A road trip/ vacation between two old friends that turns into something more(basic plot but whateva)

Song(s): Boyfriend by Ariana Grande, Let You Down by NF, and You’re My Best Friend by Queen ;)

Pairing: Ben x reader

Word Count: 4385

Warnings: AnGsT, masturbation in the shower lmao, and some friendship fluff

If you would like to be added to the taglist, just ask!

*Reblogs/asks/opinions are always appreciated!*

Ch. 4: The Desk Girl

------------

     God, you were dreading the long drive from Yuma to San Diego. It was going to be a long three hours. You and Ben hadn’t talked about last night, even though there wasn’t much to talk about. But when you had woken up this morning, Ben wasn’t there. He wasn’t even in the hotel room for that matter. You just had decided to continue your morning routine and get packed and ready to leave. Ben came back but hadn’t talked to you, not even a simple hello. It was the first time in never that he never even said good morning or hello to you. He walked passed you like you were some stranger, a complete rando. It was a little scary and odd but you let him be because you had to worry about yourself and get your stuff situated. 

     When noon hit, you were already to go. Your stuff was loaded into the back of the SUV and so was Ben’s. You were all ready to hit the road and hurry and get to the house that your uncle had so kindly given you to use while he was away on a business trip. You’ve been to his house before and it was magnificent. You went inside the lobby to give back the keys to the room when you saw Ben talking to the lady at the front desk. The same girl who had given you your keys when you checked in. You could obviously tell she was smitten by Ben and was trying to flirt with him. And you could tell he was flirting back. It infuriated you because he could make time to talk to her, but didn’t have the time to even say hello to you? His best friend? Fine, two can play at this game. 

     You walked up to the front desk and placed your keys in between them. Ben turned to look at you and then turned back to the girl. Oh boy was he testing you today. If he didn’t have the keys to the car, you would have left him there. You pushed Ben aside and before the girl could say anything, you place your hand on the keys and pushed them forward.

     “We’re checking out.” You turned to look at Ben who was looking down and fumbling with the keys to the car. You could tell he was embarrassed. You looked back up at the girl and said goodbye as you grabbed Ben’s arm and dragged him to the car. 

     The girl just watched as Ben waved goodbye and headed with you towards the car. You let go of his arm and climbed into the passengers seat and slammed the door. You weren’t even mad at the girl, you were mad at Ben for ignoring you all day but decided to talk to some random girl from Yuma who neither of you would even see again. Even though the real reason was because you were jealous and you knew it. One of your many downfalls, you were jealous that Ben wasn’t flirting with you but with some girl. A girl that was beautiful unlike you. She was just as beautiful as a model, absolutely stunning. You huffed in frustration, why couldn’t you be like the other girls and be pretty for once and have guys fall for you every second? You weren’t able to finish that thought because Ben jumped in the car and slammed the door harder than you had. You stared straight ahead but you could feel his green eyes burn into the side of your face. 

     “WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT, Y/N?” Ben was mad and for what, he had nothing to be mad about. All you wanted to do was get out of there. 

     “What was what?” You turned your head to look at him. Realizing he was actually mad, you turned away not wanting to look him in the eyes. 

     “I was in the middle of a conversation, and you just rudely interrupted it to turn in some stupid keys!” He sat back against the seat and waited for you to speak still tense though.

     “Sorry if you were too busy flirting but I’m ready to go and I don’t have time for this flirting bullshit that you pull every time we go somewhere, whether it be a restaurant or a god damn hotel lobby, you always find some girl that is absolutely smitten over you and then you get pulled in and it goes no where and I’m stuck looking like a dumbass. I don’t even know why you flirt with these girls when you KNOW it’s not gonna go anywhere. The only time you actually got something from it, is when you got your cock sucked once and that was about it. I’m done, really, all I wanted was to go to San Diego without any distractions.” You sat back against your seat and huff while looking out the window. “And I’m not even mad about the flirting...”

     “Then what are you mad about? Because I didn’t see a problem” Ben turned to look at you but you continued to look in the other direction. “Why won’t you look at me?!” 

     You finally had turned to face him, staring into his eyes that were filled with anger. 

     “I’M MAD BECAUSE YOU HAD TIME TO TALK TO THIS RANDOM GIRL IN THE LOBBY BUT YOU DIDN’T HAVE TIME TO EVEN SAY GOOD MORNING OR HELLO TO ME! Your best friend…” Now tears were falling down your face and you tried so hard to keep them in but it didn’t work and you turned your head to face the window again. “I thought I was important but apparently not.” 

     Complete and utter silence filled the car. 

     “But you are important to me, love. I just wasn’t in the mood to talk this morning.”

     “But you were in the mood to talk to the desk girl, yes, because that makes total sense Ben.” You wiped your tears away with the sleeve of Ben’s jersey sweater, that you didn’t want anymore. So you decide to take it off and throw it in the back seats. Ben turned to look at the sweater in the back and then looked towards you. 

     “W-why’d you take the sweater off?” His voice was cracking at the end. You didn’t want to look him in the face and tell him because right now, I fucking hate you. You couldn’t tell him that. Because you didn’t mean it. 

     “Because I’m not cold anymore.” You turned to look at him, you hadn’t realize that one tear had manged to slip down his cheek. Usually you would wipe it away for him and make him feel better but not this time. You looked forward out of the windshield. “I’m ready to go, I don’t want to talk about this right now.”

     “So that’s it? You don’t even want to try and talk about it? Try and fix it? Don’t you want to talk about last night?” He turned the keys to start the car and was getting ready for the long haul. 

     “What’s there to even talk about at this point?” You didn’t even want to look at him because he would be able to see more tears falling down your cheeks. Your voice cracked at the end but Ben didn’t noticed. Instead of listening to him bitch, you plugged in your headphones and listened to music. You had rested your elbow on the window while your chin was in your palm. This was going to be a long drive. For you and Ben. 

                    Ben’s POV

     He had woke up before you and he thanked the god’s for that. He didn’t want to explain to you why he was rocking his hips into yours. He had a fucking wet dream about you and it was embarrassing to say the least. Luckily, your a heavy sleeper and didn’t wake up to him doing that. He felt gross for doing that to you, his best friend. He couldn’t help but to see how beautiful you were when you slept. But he knew he couldn’t stare at you forever. He slipped his hands from around your waist and shimmied off the bed. He opened his suit case and pulled out some clothes to put on after he took his shower. 

     Once he grabbed his clothes, he dashed to the bathroom and jumped right into the warm, hot shower. He was still hard since he didn’t get off while he was in his wet dream. He grabbed some of the shampoo and lathered it onto his member. He couldn’t help but imagine it as your hand that was rubbing his cock and making him feel good. He let out a small moan but not loud enough to wake you up. He knew he was getting close when his thrusting became sloppier. He was fucking his hand at this point but he needed some kind of release. He needed you. He could just imagine how good you would feel to have your mouth around his cock. He couldn’t finish that thought though because he had cummed right after, letting everything go. He was sweaty and hot and the steam from the shower didn’t help. 

     He cleaned himself up and finished taking a shower. He threw on his clothes and looked in the mirror for a while. He felt gross for doing that, just like the wet dream. He knew it was wrong but oh god he still did it. He looked away and dried his wet hair with the towel and walked out of the bathroom. You were still asleep on the bed of course. You hated waking up in the morning and Ben knew that. It always worked in his favor when he woke up earlier than you. He had looked at the time on his phone, it was 8:32. He still had enough time before your 9 o’clock alarm went off, but he didn’t want to be here when you did wake up. He didn’t want to talk about him cuddling up next to you and he hoped you didn’t notice him having a wet dream right against you. He didn’t even want to talk to you. 

     Instead, he decided to go get some coffee down the street. He got the car keys and left, he went down the hall towards the elevator and got in. Once he reached the lobby, he headed towards the front door but wasn’t paying attention and bumped into a lady in some kind of uniform. It was the hotel uniform. 

     “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to bump into you.” He quickly said before making eye contact with the girl. She was pretty, but not as pretty as you. 

     “It’s alright. I should have been paying attention to my surroundings and not my phone.” She looked up at Ben and made eye contact for a few seconds before Ben broke away. All he could do was nod, he wanted to get out of there as fast as possible. He’s seen the look in her eyes like all of the other girls he’s been with. She was helplessly falling for him and he knew it. He broke the silence before she could. 

    “Well, I should get going.” He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand while not making eye contact. 

     “O-okay, maybe I’ll talk to you later?” She asked with hope in her voice. 

     “Maybe…” and with that, Ben took off for the car. 

                30 minutes later

     He didn’t just go for coffee, Ben decided to go walk around for a bit in the park from last night and enjoy the morning breeze. He pulled out his phone to check the time, it was already 9:10. He needed to get back to pack up and put everything in the car to leave. He still didn’t want to talk to you, maybe if he could avoid contact until the car ride, maybe it would be fine. He threw away the empty coffee cup and headed to the car to go back to the hotel. 

     Once he arrived, the girl he ran into from earlier was sitting at the front desk looking at her phone. Maybe he could sneak by without her noticing. He succeed and headed for the elevator. He didn’t like the girl but she was nice. He didn’t want her though. He wanted you, you were the one playing through his head during the night. He couldn’t get you out. Once he reached the right floor, he headed for the room, hoping you were in the shower. When he opened the door, he saw that you weren’t in the room but instead in the bathroom, doing your morning routine. He walked by without saying anything, not even a simple hello. He felt bad but he couldn’t bring himself to talking to you. He walked over to his side of the room and started packing his clothes into his suitcase. 

     He finished packing and loading his stuff into the car around 11:34 and was waiting for you to finish. When you had came out of the bathroom earlier, you looked at him but didn’t say a thing. She knew he would be the first to say good morning or hello, it was like routine but he didn’t, not today. Now, he was waiting in the lobby with the car keys and messing around on social media. He got bored of that and wanted someone to talk to and he knew who. 

     He walked over to the front desk where the girl from earlier sat. She looked up as he walked over, her eyes beaming. 

     “Hey,” Ben said as he leaned up against the counter. “Just thought you would like some company instead of your phone.” 

     “I would love that,” She said as she put her phone down. “What’s your name? I never caught it when we bumped into each other earlier.”

     “That’s because I never threw it.” Ben saw that the girl had chuckled at his joke. But god, her laugh didn’t even compare to yours. “It’s Ben though. You?”

     “Rachel.”

     “What a beautiful name, love. I could say it all day and never get tired of it.” He knew how flirting worked, he was a pro at it. He also practiced with Y/n because she said he wasn’t a “lady’s man” yet and needed practice. 

     “Thank you! What brings you here to Yuma? Not many people like to come here.” 

     “Well, me and my friend actually are just stopping by to see family before heading out again.” Ben could see you coming though the front doors from the corner of his eye. 

     “Just friends?” Rachel was a bit curious about that. 

     “Yep.” Popping the p before Y/n slid the keys between the two of you. He looked over at her then back to Rachel. Ben knew what he was doing, he was trying to make Y/n jealous. Before he knew it, Y/n pushed him to the side and left him there to turn in the keys herself. He started to fumbled with the car keys and was a little embarrassed as of how easily she could control him. Y/n yanked his arm and dragged him to the car. Ben turned around and simply waved goodbye to Rachel. 

     Once they reached the car, Y/n let go of his arm and jumped into the passenger side and slammed the door. Ben wasn’t even supposed to be mad but her attitude was changing that. He climbed into the drivers side and slammed the door harder. He turned to look at her but she wouldn’t look at him and he didn’t know why. 

     “WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT, Y/N?” 

     “What was what?” She finally faced him and quickly turned back away. 

     “I was in the middle of a conversation, and you just rudely interrupted it to turn in some stupid keys!” Ben was right though, originally it was just a conversation but then he turned it into something to use against Y/n but she didn’t need to know that. He leaned back against his seat. 

     “Sorry if you were too busy flirting but I’m ready to go and I don’t have time for this flirting bullshit that you pull every time we go somewhere, whether it be a restaurant or a god damn hotel lobby, you always find some girl that is absolutely smitten over you and then you get pulled in and it goes no where and I’m stuck looking like a dumbass. I don’t even know why you flirt with these girls when you KNOW it’s not gonna go anywhere. The only time you actually got something from it, is when you got your cock sucked once and that was about it. I’m done, really, all I wanted was to go to San Diego without any distractions.” You said with full anger and some sadness mixed in. Ben was a little taken back, he didn’t expect that. Not at all. 

     “And I’m not even mad about the flirting...” You finally said after relaxing against the passenger's seat. 

     “Then what are you mad about? Because I didn’t see a problem” He decided to face you so you could make eye contact but you didn’t. He was getting frustrated. “Why won’t you look at me?!” 

     “I’M MAD BECAUSE YOU HAD TIME TO TALK TO THIS RANDOM GIRL IN THE LOBBY BUT YOU DIDN’T HAVE TIME TO EVEN SAY GOOD MORNING OR HELLO TO ME! Your best friend…” Now it was getting deep. Too deep. She started to cry. Fuck. He hated it when you cried. Y/n faced back to the window to try and hide her tears but he had already seen them fall. “I thought I was important but apparently not.” 

     Ben didn’t know what to say to make any of this better. He was breaking little by little. 

     “But you are important to me, love. I just wasn’t in the mood to talk this morning.” He finally says. He knew that didn’t sound right but it was the only thing that could come out of his mouth at this point. 

     “But you were in the mood to talk to the desk girl, yes, because that makes total sense Ben.” After you said that, you took off Ben’s sweater and threw it in the back. 

     “W-why’d you take the sweater off?” Ben’s voice was breaking and he was so close to crumbling. A single tear had managed to escape and run down his cheek. 

     “Because I’m not cold anymore.” When you said that you turned to face him but then towards the windshield. If you weren’t there right now, Ben would break down and start crying. “I’m ready to go, I don’t want to talk about this right now.”

     “So that’s it? You don’t even want to try and talk about it? Try and fix it? Don’t you want to talk about last night?” Ben said before starting the car and heading out of the parking lot of the hotel. 

     “What’s there to even talk about at this point?” You finally say before turning away from him and getting lost in your own world. Ben didn’t know what to do. But all he knew he could do was to drive to San Diego. He was going to fucking hate the next three hours. 

                       Y/N POV

     A hour already passed and you and Ben haven’t talked the whole time. It was really stressing you out. This is the longest time you both haven’t spoken to each other. You didn’t like it one bit so you decided to take matters into your own hands. You took your headphones out and flip your body so you were facing Ben. He didn’t look so good, his eyes were red and his cheeks were stained with dried tears. How did you not notice your best friend crying his eyes out next to you for the last hour? You really were a bad friend. Ben didn’t need you, you didn’t deserve him really. You were the one making him cry. You put your hand on his thigh and started to rub it with your thumb. He looked over to you but quickly back to the road. In that small glance you could see regret and sorrow in his sage eyes. 

     “Ben…” You started to dig your nails into your palm with the hand that wasn’t on Ben’s thigh. You did this when you got anxious, stressed, or scared but right now, you were all three. “Can we talk?”

     “You said there was nothing to talk about…” He softly whispered. His voice cracking, he was breaking, you were breaking him. 

     “But there is, Ben, we need to talk or we’re just gonna end up never talking again and wasting this time in anger when we could be jamming out and laughing like we always do.” 

     “Then where do we even start?”

     “Why not about how you didn’t want to talk to me this morning?” That’s where you wanted to start at least because it was the source of the problem. 

     “Because I just wasn’t in the mood, love, really.” Ben’s voice was slowly getting louder and more steady.

     “But why the desk girl and not me?” You didn’t understand and you decided to remove your hand from his thigh. 

     “Her name isn’t desk girl,” Ben chuckled which made you smile. “Her name was Rachel and I was just talking to her while I was waiting for you.” 

     “Well did you get her number? Did my flirting lessons teach you how to be a lady’s man?” You rested your head against your seat and stared ahead at the never ending road. 

     “No, I didn’t really want it,” Ben pulled your hand back to his lap. “But why were you so upset about me talking to her? I mean I understand from earlier when you sa-”

     “Benny, I really didn’t mean any of those things. I was just mad and wanted to get out of there and I was being a bitchhhhh.” Ben nodded and kept silent. “Ben?”

     “Yeah?”

     “Where were you this morning?”

     “I woke up early, got coffee, and went back to the park from last night. Why?”

     “Oh…” You were scared that Ben had woke up and got up because he didn’t want to be next to you and that he regret sleeping next to you or that it was wrong. “I just thought you were mad at me or that you regretted sleeping next to me last night.”

     “NO- I mean, no I don’t regret laying next to you, I kept you warm didn’t I?” Ben looked at you and wiggled his eyebrows. Which, in return, made you laugh.

     “You did. And I’m glad you did or I would have froze to death.” After you said that, you turned around and grabbed something from the back. It was Ben’s soccer sweater. The sweater all the players get from the school at the end of the season with his number on the back. His number was 18, which you called his “lucky number”. You quickly put it on and snuggled in it. You looked over at Ben, who was already looking at you up and down. You knew he loved seeing you in his sweaters. 

     “So NOW your cold?” Ben asked.

     “Yes, I am. Got a problem Jones?” You asked as you put the hoodie on and pulled on the strings to make the opening smaller.

     “No, but it does look better on you than it does me.” and that you could agree with him. You stole a lot of Ben’s clothes like his shorts and shirts and sometimes even his shoes, even though they don’t fit since they’re two sizes larger than your feet. 

     “Good because I’m keeping it.” God, just ten minutes ago, you and Ben were both tear stained messes but now you both were giggling and laughing. Maybe the drive wouldn’t be so bad after all. 

     “How about we put on some music?” Ben handed you the aux cord from the little compartment between the two seats. You plug the aux cord into the radio and your phone and picked a song. You loved this song and Ben did too. 

         You’re the best friend that I ever had

        I’ve been with you such a long time  

 You’re my sunshine and I want you to know

       That my feelings are true

         I really love you

     You and Ben sang along until the very end and you decided to just put on your spotify playlist. You saw that Ben’s face was still stained from his tears so you grabbed the sleeve of the sweater and wiped Ben’s cheek with it. At first Ben resisted but then gave in to your touch against his skin. You ruffled his hair and gave him a quick smile before using the scrunchie from your wrist and throwing your hair in a messy bun. You guys still had one hour and thirty minutes to go before arriving to the house so might as well get comfortable. You and Ben hadn’t really planned anything for the next two months in San Diego. It was more of just going with the flow. Or at least that what Ben said. 

     Ben wasn’t really organized and he didn’t plan ahead like you. You liked to plan weeks ahead and liked to stay organized with your many binders and folders. You both were total opposites but worked so well together. Even though Ben was the true gentlemen and didn’t like to get too dirty, he was the one who loved sports. You liked to get dirty, occasionally, you would play with him but most of the time you didn’t play any sports. Weird. 

     “Buddy, I know your thinking about something over there. Spill it.” Ben said as he kept looking towards the road.

     “I’m just thinking about how we don’t have anything planned for the next two months.”

     “Just go with the flow. It’ll be fine, we’ll be fine. I promise.” He grabbed your hand and rubbed your knuckles with his thumb reassuringly. 

     “Okay.” 

    It’ll be fine he said, We’ll be fine he said, he promised. But lied.

--------

@luvborhap