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#i dont know how to phrase this in a way that's not mean but i don't really want my friends to just be friends bc they admire/look up to me?
cubedmango · 1 year
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「30歳の童貞に片想いすると魔法使いになれるらしい」 (from cherry magic volume 11 special edition) — english translation
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boy in silly sitting positions compilation
#cats#I especially like the last one where he just has one single paw poking out of that box for some reason lol#I still have costumes to post and like a billion other things.... grr... constantly failing at staying active on social media aughh#I think because currently my Main Focus is on trying to get my game done and stuff.. which basically just means sitting and writing all day#so there's not much to post about. Though I know the Good At Social Media thing to do would be to post about the#writing and share progress and talk about the game and characters or whatever to try to build interest or something but that is SOOO weird#to me.. I could maybe get it if it was like a tiny tiny discord groupchat of playtesters with like 5 people in#it.. But something about talking openly about things before they happen is weird to me?? Like presumptuous feeling or something#''oooo guess whats gonna happen LATER!!!'' like.. how do you know.. what if it doesnt. what if you dont finish it. what if its not the way#you think it's going to be. what if something changes. etc. Like I literally avoid movie trailers and game trailers for the same reason ghj#Even if it's not ME doing it it just feels... weird.. Maybe it has to do with my OCD and how I just don't like talking about ''future''#things in Certain Terms. Like if I was going to say ''Oh yeah sure. come over to my house in a few months''. I would have to follow it up#with like ''HOPEFULLY you can come over to my house in a few months'' or 'They'll come over in a few months MOST LIKELY''. Because just#stating that something will happen matter of factly takes for granted like.. what if somehting horrible happens and I DONT have a house#in a few months? or what if something bad happens to me. or to the person coming over? I can't ever DEFINITELY say with 100% certainty#that one could ACTUALLY come to my house in a few months. anything could change. So I have to allot for that in my phrasing. hbjjkn#There are a lot of situations where you're expected to just Assume Things but for some reason that bothers me. My brain literally does not#even Assume the most basic things.. like how do *I* know that just because it's someones birthday that they want to be wished a happy#birthday? what if they dont? everyone is different and has different preferences. I should check with them first. or wait until they public#ly announce that theyre accepting birthday wishes. I have to allot for all 5034859069 rare possibilities at any given time and never take#anything for certain. etc. ghjbjhbh.... ANYWAY.. I have been feeling a bit sick lately as usual.. but still slowly making progress on some#things. Moslty I need to edit costume photos. make sculptures. and work on the game. Going back reading some of the old writing from like#2018 and suprisingly I don't have to change that much of it? In fact I like it mostly. so that's good. I would be very interested if I were#playing the game myself. Though that doesnt mean much since my tastes are so niche lol..#Still really want to clear some of my million tumblr drafts as well... alas and aughh and ooughh and so on and so forth. Between all of my#evil appointments other such things...why cant I have one billion dollar to retire into relaxed hermit artist life of no stressors.. bleas
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puppyeared · 4 months
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who up seeing their disorder in a fictional character but feel like its not their place to put a name on it
#id have to be waterboarded before i can talk abt how i see a lot of my adhd and personality in mitsumi iwakura let alone post it#idk how to talk abt this without feeling like im talking over or invalidating ppls experiences relating with a character#someone was talking abt how ppl tie laios' autism to special interest and social difficulties but not much else which kinda flattens it#and then went into a respectful in depth analysis of other autistic behaviour that laios exhibits and it wasnt phrased meanly#its fascinating and important to me to hear someone explain a little bit abt traits that they recognized and often go overlooked#because it does help me learn more about it. but i think thats also where hesitancy kicks in when it comes to depicting it accurately#like i have adhd and some of my adhd symptoms overlap with autism (time blindness and pattern seeking behaviour) but that only means#it feels familiar to me even without having autism. on top of that traits arent always cleanly determined as being /caused/ by#a disorder. to understand my environment i compare it to something unrelated but similar to make it more familiar and for the longest time#i thought that was a personality thing and not an information processing thing since i loved playing pretend in my head as a kid#so if you make a character who experiences that hoping to reach people that also experience that and tell them its not weird or#smth youre making up like. thats the goal. ppl who dont get it arent expected to it just means it doesnt cater to them but it helps them#become familiar to it yk? since i dont have autism myself i dont feel confident i can depict it properly or explain it in my own words#but that doesnt mean im trying to dismiss it or try and cut it out completely.. ill just leave the floor open to someone who /can/#a lot of issues around fanon depictions are when smth is baselessly popularized or a characters personality and behavior is flattened#especially to fit them into a trending meme. its harmless and its supposed to be for fun but it gets tricky when you drag things that#need to be carefully explained beforehand or else it gets lost in translation. like that tweet abt 'hyperfixating' on cooking pasta#once it becomes popular language usually the original meaning is left out for the sake of simplifying it for everyone that when it#circles back theres a sort of hesitancy like. am i using it the way it was intended or am i unknowingly using the popularized version of it#actually thats probably why i felt wrongfooted during diagnosis bc it felt like i was misusing the words i heard to describe what i felt#i /know/ i see a lot of myself in mitsumi because our minds are always somewhere else and we tend to put good faith first and for me#that personal connection is enough. but idk it feels like its always gonna have to be 'palatable' first before i can talk abt it openly#mad respect to writers and creators who stick to their story even if theres the looming fear of ppl misinterpreting it and letting them#have it.. its been almost 2 weeks and i am so close to deleting that m3 dunmeshi drawing bc ppl keep saying chilchuck wouldnt have 200 HP#IT LITERALLY SAYS I MADE IT WHILE WATCHING EP 1. I USED EARTHBOUND LOGIC AND I WASNT EVEN TAKING IT SERIOUSLY CHILL#yapping
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thegreatyin · 3 months
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honestly looking back at all the irem futures. the funniest takeaway from all of them is that fires is 2000% doomed by the narrative. no matter what, This Specific Evil Capitalist Bat, out of All The Other Evil Capitalist Bats, is apparently The Most Dead Guy Coded member of the bazaar's fucked up goofy horrible workplace sitcom. how does (will?) this even happen
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timetravellingkitty · 2 months
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I could elaborate on said negative feelings but that would require not having a runny nose
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mantisgodsdomain · 3 months
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We ought to write more Pokemon fic some time. We want to recreate the Pokemon Manners/Human Manners cheat sheet that we made a few years ago we think that this site would like the Sliding Scale Of Politeness When Greeting A New Pokemon You've Never Met Before.
#we speak#writing#we grew up with pmd games and we feel like the way that pmd pokemon's dialogue tends to be excessively... direct?#should be a feature and not a bug when any pokemon that you meet might be totally unfamiliar with your species and biology#it's probably very polite to start up front with some basic facts about yourself so they know how to act going forward#the very upfront feel to dialogue also very much helps with keeping the dialogue feel more... pokemon#people mock the series for weird npc dialogue a lot but we think that taking these things literally makes for more fun society building#it doesn't all have to fit with socially acceptable for our world we think. polite in our world isn't even consistent by household.#sometimes a polite interaction sounds like “hello! i'm poochyena! i like to chase people and bite!”#name and immediately socially useful information. now you know about the chasing people and biting so you don't assume it's rude#of course poochyena bites and chases people. it likes to do that. you can say you don't like that and it might stop doing that to You#but it will not stop biting and chasing people because that's what it likes to do and it will probably only befriend people okay with that#it makes a very specific dialogue feel that's very fun to do. we like how the pokemon world tends to treat any sort of like#disability or “weird” things as something that you just say out the gate and everyones like “oh okay”#and then treat that as Part Of Interactions going forwards. there are a surprising amount of parts of the pokemon manga#that are dedicated to working around a character's disability after one or all of their means of dealing with it get taken out#admittedly we aren't that caught up on newer content but we find the way that it tends to be just Accepted as very refreshing#making the dialogue this direct does also tend to make it read as more “childish” in english and particular because a lot of Maturity's jus#learning how to dance around what you're saying or phrase it in different ways to get your idea across differently#whereas here everything is just as direct as possible. “i don't like charmander”. “i like roasting berries”. “i want to dig things up”.#all pokemon dialogue tends to go towards being exceedingly simple and it makes for some very distinct writing#especially when you have to tackle complex situations with characters who probably dont employ that sort of vocabulary#though we personally enjoy doing this sort of stuff your mileage may vary ofc#we are biased towards this sort of thins because we find it MUCH more fun to build up what we're talking about from blocks#than to like. try and use more indirect wording that may lose things in translation#unfortunately this is not fun in irl conversation. everyone has to be on the same page and you need to use the same playbook to communicate#we REALLY wish people said what they meant though. we're really tired of being asked shit like “is this accessible”#when what they mean is “can you climb these stairs” a question which depends on the day our energy level and how things have been going#there are a lot of things we could say that would make us feel like some sort of anti sjw type guy and a lot of em boil down to just#"for the love of god dont dance around a Sensitive Topic just get to the point and ask us about it this just makes things harder for everyo
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dangerous-advantage · 10 months
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tgcf writing request(s)
eyo i am in a bit of a slump writing-wise so. if you see this and are interested, i would be very down for you to send me in any tgcf/hualian writing prompts!
i cannot promise anything concrete will come of it, but i am desperate <3 also uninspired
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bonnieisaway · 8 months
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i need i need someone to write a fic or SOMETHING about the ten minutes between in season 3 when thirteen held the medicine out to seven and said "take them off," and then in the next scene he's in his casual clothes. and i don't mean anything smutty or anything. i don't think that'd fit there. i just mean if i don't even get to mildly grasp the raw romantic tension fuck it the raw tension PERIOD during that i am going to fucking DIE. i'm going to explode okay? you can't tell me that these two gaylords, already sufficently down the fuck bad enough for eachother, okay, didn't either have the most tender and/or raw tension filled moment while thirteen bandaged
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THIS PART OF HIS FUCKING BODY
THIS SCENE STARTS ONLY WHEN HE'S PUTTING HIS CLOTHES BACK ON BECAUSE THE DIRECTORS HATE ME PERSONALLY.
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py6oto · 11 months
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this has nothing to do with anything ive ever posted but i need an answer.
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gibbearish · 7 months
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its been fun watching the hbomb subreddit try very very hard to stick to the "if anyone harasses james on my behalf they wont see the light of heaven" by imo overcorrecting to "any time anyone mentions somerton ever it's because you're obsessed with him and want to pick on him because he's the villain of the week" bc its like. yknow actually i dont think people keeping an eye on his various attempts to weasel back into the spotlight and keep doing his same old shit over the last /two months/ is the same as harassing him because it's hip and fun. i think maybe those are not the same thing
#and like obv yes its possible to do both but idk#im just kinda like. 'dont harass him' and 'ignore him completely even if hes continuing to do shitty things' are um#different. those are different#origibberish#i will say though that subreddit is very good for gauging if im getting weirdly parasocial at him#like i still have yet to do that at a celebrity i like afaik because i just. Dont Like Celebrities usually#so now that i have one (1) that autism brain has finally decided to look up to im like Uh Oh Is It Finally Time#and then i see posts on there sometimes and im like. ohhh ok no i get it now#and i mean i can see why they feel that way‚ its the hbomb subreddit and Thats The Most Recent Hbomb Video#and it had yknow. immediate and impressive results#so of course people are going to a) talk about it a lot and b) talk about the aftermath as it happens#and if youre in the 'only talking about this one guy' group and that one guy has only talked about one other guy in the last Year#like. yeah . youre mostly gonna be hearing about that guy#oh parasocial abt hbomb not abt somerton i just realized how the phrasing there was weird jwhfksbfk#that being said i literally made a post like two weeks ago abt how i didnt actually know his first name so like i think im probably good#my scope of knowledge about him extends Exclusively to whats In His Videos#or well and i guess to like. patreon posts too but i tend to just dismiss patreon notifs without reading them a lot KENFKSNFMDB#like yeah yeah this show i follow posted their podcast i dont follow early for patreon subs i dont care get out of my way
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plutosoda · 3 months
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hello, you are cool person and I wanna talk to you more, but I am NERVOUS to DM you
i also get nervous about responding 👍so
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iftari · 20 days
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i think. that ppl in north gaza are some of the most incredible humans that have ever existed. for staying. for experiencing the worst of the worst. for being the bravest possible. and it is because the unarmed palestinians are still there that hamas and any other resistance fighters are able to continue to fight and hold onto the landscape. that is how each palestinian is an automatic resistance fighter. that i show existance is resistance in this moment for palestinians in gaza. there is so much bravery i think people will spent centuries just trying to articulate it. i think the journalists and story tellers in north gaza, they are so brave. i think the beings are so brave. i think the beings there are so revolutionary. every being. the earth being in existance, the plants that continue to grow in the face of bombs and weapons i cannot imagine. the other animals like cats and birds and every being i cannot name still surviving, still finding refuge, still breathing and not just giving up si so incredible. i am in beyond awe. i am so irrevocably changed by genocide. i am so fundementally different.
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caffeinatedopossum · 2 years
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I don't understand why it's generally not socially acceptable to recognize your good qualities. Like I don't understand why it's bad to be a show-off or a know-it-all or to brag. Like I think most people know "those things = bad" but not why.
It also seems like people are always either waaaaay into one end of the scale where they are just so unbearably full of themselves and have preposterously high self esteem (and most people act like this is fine too? Like a lot of celebrities and white men specifically seem to be like this) and I don't understand why so many people respect them then. Or they're the complete opposite with self esteem way too low despite the fact that they have redeeming qualities.
I feel like maybe the reason it's considered bad to brag is because you might 'make' other people feel inadequate but see that seems like a stupid reason to me because the problem then is not that you stated an opinion of your own self worth but is actually that everyone else is conditioned to compare themselves to each other in a very unhealthy way. And I think instead of discouraging people from opening up about what they take pride in, what they like about themselves, what makes them feel happy or content or confident, maybe we could just be discouraging people from viewing those things as personal threats? Idk just trying to formulate some thoughts on this
#idk why but this feels like a very convoluted topic#like so many people are probably coming from different starting positions on this than i am and im afraid that might#make it be misinterpreted or something#like i feel like there definitely is a balance where some self esteem is too little and some is too much#it just feels like it is exceedingly rare to find anyone with ideal realistic self esteem and idk why#i also dont mean this in a way to say that every action is the responsibility of the people taking offense either#because obviously thats not how that works. its understandable to demand a certain amount of respect#and to accept that your words (even the ones you say about yourself) could negatively impact other people#and thats not necessarily on them for being defensive#idk social concepts are strange and foreign to me so im still figuring this stuff out and through an autistic lense to boot#so sometimes i feel a bit like im conducting a study or an experiment more than writing a blog post#im just trying to understand people because i need to#it seems like the overwhelming majority of allistics have absolutely no interest in why they do the things that they do#so i have to go around experimenting instead of asking direct questions about this stuff#because when i do ask direct questions they look at me like i just asked them if the sky is actually blue or if its just gasses up there#in case you are not the most common dimwit. the sky is both of those things. however when you ask someone a question#phrased like that about a topic they dont want to admit they dont know about. they will usually avoid the question or answer absurdly#its actually kinda funny you should try it sometime#now im distracted because i dont know enough about how the sky works and i need to know#anyways gonna go down a research rabbit hole methinks
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depresseddepot · 2 months
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I have dreams all the time where I'm sad when I wake up but last night I dreamt that I told a joke so funny that random strangers were just straight up sending me money. my best friend's mom sent me $1000 with the caption "haha!"
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femmeunicorn · 2 months
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not having a fun time
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ruthlesslistener · 11 months
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"I didn't mean to trigger! We BOTH hurt each other!" And the trigger in question is... (squints eyes) "Being called a Pedophile over different headcanons" . You sound like a huge asshole right now, just saying. I'm not even the person who sent that ask lol.
Dude. Its just you who was wrong. Why you gotta make things about yourself again...
I'm not saying that what I did wasn't wrong, but it also wasn't intentional, was the thing, and I never meant to call anon themselves a pedophile. I was talking about the ideology and the very specific 'its okay because even if they're physically a child they're mentally an adult' talking point, operating off of the assumption that that was what the conversation was about as well as the fact that I assumed everyone would realize that just because you're regurgitating a talking point from a specific group doesn't mean that you are part of said group or believe in their beliefs. As it turns out, that wasn't what it was about at all, I was unclear that I do not in any way think that what you like in fiction is a solid indicator of who you are as a person, and that's where my error lay.
I'm also not the only one in the wrong here, because I kept repeatedly saying that I fucked up, that I was done with the conversation and didn't want to talk about that topic because it made me very uncomfortable, yet people still kept sending me asks about it and blowing off my very real distress about it. THAT'S where I'm not in the wrong, and that's why I pointed it out. I'm not making this about myself, I'm specifically pointing out that it was a two-way fight where both people were in error. And yes, by 'both people' I'm very much including me. Because I very much charged into the a china-shop conversation with all the subtlety and thought of a moose in rut (that's where I'm at fault), but also because people kept ignoring my explanations about it and jumping to conclusions/saying I was saying things that I very explicitly stated that I did not mean and was regretful for letting the error come about in the first place. THAT'S where I'm not at fault.
No, anon is not a pedophile and was not talking about pedophilic talking points. I also very much never called them that specifically, or did it with the intent to drag anyone who thinks like that under the umbrella of 'very real dangerous sexual predator'. I have zero desire to redtag people or use my apparent fame to drag people through the muck, or make them stop having headcanons different than my own. I made a poorly-phrased quip about something I thought was a nonissue on a website where people DO jump to absolute conclusions about a person's character based on what they like in completely fictional content and then got severely fucking turned around, which prompted me say more bullshit about something that wasn't even close to the case of what I was angry about.
I was in the wrong there and I fully admit it, but you also have to believe that I'm genuine when I say that it was a mistake and that I'm just as turned around about it as everyone else, because that's really all that I can do here.
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