#i dont feel trapped | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

himero-love · 2 years ago

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1/7

woke up with another nightmare about A & had an extremely hard time breathing, even while writing this. they really fucked up my sense of life being disabled. it’s been going over & over in my head about how disabled they called me ever since they said that a month ago. told my therapist awhile back & it hasn’t helped. feel broken :(

trying to remind myself of good things- yesterday i got praised in front of everyone by the higher ups by how i handled the er situation. they kept looking over at me & talking & smiling abt how well PM staff adapted, communicated & took the right measures. i cringed away from the praise & looked down when everyone clapped at me. i had a really hard time at work yesterday even though ik people value me & respect me more and more. i feel like a horrible person even though last night the new client took me aside to say how empathetic & supportive i am, even though the clients literally made me a shirt. i typically feel horrible in the mornings before meds & i also woke up at 6 after getting home pretty late, so it’s likely that but… :( work + reminder of how betrayed i was by A & all the friends around them. my therapist & friends agree abt how poorly they handled things & even how angry she was on my behalf. i like my therapist a lot- she even helped me through the canada & engagement thing & made me feel like i’m not crazy.

i’d like to get to know my fiancé more & send letters to canada. she’s so sweet & kind. i think that’d be nice :,)

drove home from work & a coyote just stared at me for awhile, without fear 😭 yall

also sobbin, finally brought this shirt home 🥹💗

had to work things out with someone today, but i think i resolved it best i could. proud of myself for being brave. happy that others aren’t surprised by my bravery & knowing that’s now an integral part of my character :)

#not anymore but #kill bill by sza hits different with intrusive thoughts #she’s so real for that song #but my love & i listened to death with dignity on repeat #my love is an exaggeration but we’ve always used pet names #i wonder how this all feels like for her #for someone aroace #she’s been more excited than me #i dont feel trapped #but definitely still have a lot of inner reflection to do rn #gotta learn french :/#had the lucky circle of incense but i really need to clean my room #the tarot spread literally spans the entire floor #got entranced & did so much #it really drained my energy #need to be better about channeling energy from other sources than myself #was annoyed at my coworker bc she took credit for my work & also asked me if i was med pass trained when we literally got it together #at the same time #& i’ve been passing meds for months now #also wrote her whole ir report & just like 😐#i think she’s annoyed at me & being more distant intentionally #which i think is okay #as long as we’re professional #found another richard siken lover! and essay lover! joan didion!#getting along well with individuals in their 30s these days #i like them

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emilyjunk · 2 months ago

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"Kevin isn't that bad it's not like he beats her, why does she need to kill him or fake her death, just get divorced" you are the point of the show, you are missing the crucial reveal. Allison sees Kevin in every single scene as she does their last scene together, but we as the audience aren't privy to that and we only see sitcom Kevin which is Kevin's self perception. He is not suddenly becoming scary and threatening to her. He was like that the whole time. We only see Allison's feelings about Kevin and the aftermath of her interactions with Kevin -- this is the ONLY time we see Kevin from her POV except for the brief initial breaking of the sitcom cam. Every other time we see Kevin on screen it's from Kevin's POV. Even after she cuts her hand we only see the bandage in her singular pov when she is away from kevin, but when it shifts back to sitcom Kevin it's gone.... We do not see the reality of her interactions with Kevin, that's the point of the show!!! Because when Kevin is on screen, it's Kevin's world! We only see Kevin from anyone else's lens in ONE scene at the end, which is when Allison decides to leave, so yes the sitcom cam "softens his abuse" but it also just fully acts as an unreliable narration because we never literally see Kevin from anyone else's POV until the series finale so every time Kevin is on screen it isn't even an accurate portrayal of what's happening, it's Kevin's perception of what's happening. Allison has viewed him like that the entire show, we as the audience just did not get to witness that POV until the end

#personal #this is exactly how it feels to have someone like that in your life!#everyone is like 'hes not that bad' bc they are in the sitcom cam!!!! you dont see it from the other pov #i like. didn't relate much until the sitcom cam dropped and then suddenly it was like being slapped in the face #bc that is how Allison ALWAYS sees kevin...... we just didn't get to witness it until then. and then that felt extremely relatable #screeching....#ik im years late bc i only now just watched but honestly???? masterpiece of television holy shit #kevin can fuck himself #kevin can f**k himself #Allison is not just 'trapped in a marriage she hates' we are just not privy to her terror bc we dont see kevin from her pov at all #we only see kevin from kevins pov #we see her talking about kevin a lot but we dont actually get to see how trapped and scared she feels until that last moment #hhhh

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rkelspn · 6 months ago

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cas dying in a glue trap

#castiel #spn fanart #well #the concept reminds me of damaged wings #which i (used to)often see on butterflies caught in glue traps #then i feel i have to draw this #of course angels dont die in glue traps #but isnt this kinda cute

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thethespacecoyote · 21 days ago

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contemplating what exactly it was about ford that made bill feel important now

#text #gravity falls #billford #because hes had countless worshippers over the centuries #I wonder what made ford special and what made his 'betrayal' more painful #I have no answers its just interesting to think about #and I love hearing peoples feelings on the complexities of mortal/immortal relationships esp with these freaks #whatever it is I do think if we take some of bills feelings as genuine #despite his proclamations that ford was a pawn and a pet #I think there are enough hints that maybe for the first time he viewed a mortal being on a somewhat equal footing #and maybe thats the distinction #he couldve killed ford easily in the first weirdmaggedon ep especially since in the moment he didnt know he was trapped by the barrier #and yet he doesnt #and when he does unfreeze ford he offers him power and a place at his side #which was primarily a manipulation tactic but man...I dont know #of course its hard to tell with a character like bill what was a lie and what is genuine #thats the whole point #I do think there are real feelings he has but theyre so hidden under irony and self loathing that I dont even know if hes aware of them

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mamawasatesttube · 6 months ago

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welcome, dc fans. planning to post something in the kon-el tag? i have a challenge for you: you must state three facts about kon-el, without mentioning either tim drake or lex luthor. (for bonus points, you can't mention young justice in general, either.) if you can't, the saw trap goes off, so choose wisely. your time starts... now.

#rimi talks #i dont remember the exact format of the saw trap meme because ive never seen a saw movie #(i havent saw them you could even say.) (i know that's grammatically incorrect but it's for the bit you see.) (you saw. right?)#but in spirit the whole ''putting people in a saw trap'' thing is how i feel every time i look at tags #it gets worse the more superman i read liksdjlfksd #which is like. i am having so much fun reading superman comics! ... i am having so much less fun looking at dc ao3 lmao #What If People Would Read The Source Material Before Trying To Create Transformative Derivatives Of It...

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katabay · 9 months ago

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original thief series basso & garrett :)

ngl, it's about quality over quantity for me. an npc can have a total of three minutes of screen time, but if they have a cool name, they can live rent free in my head and I'll spend several hours trying to decipher drawable features from a blurry screenshot of pixels

there is a vague hint of a story here, and that's because every time I try to play thi4f, I get incredibly frustrated with how Not Fun the game play is. like, is the story good? well. but it has a PLAGUE. that should've given it instant 'I'll replay this once a year' status in my heart, but the game play sucks so bad that I've never finished it. I can't believe Not Fun gameplay beat out my obsession with narrative plagues.

anyway, the idea is basically if the original era had a game with a plague centric narrative and some other stuff I liked out of thi4f thrown into a narrative blender, with a heavy dash of horror thrown in because some parts of the thief games were scarier to me than entire dedicated horror genre games.

⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app

#if i had a laptop and the skillset i would attempt a story mod because the thief modders who create whole mission stories #are GENIUS and also somewhat terrifying. love them! xoxox #anyway im actually kind of obsessed with parts of thi4f but its also like. not at that sweet spot of almost good enough to be fun #to talk about. which. for the record. has not stopped me from talking about it at length to people #the city itself actually fucking fascinates me. its almost alive and im SO mad that not a single part of that game is actually terrifying #it should be gnarlier and instead it feels a bit like it doesn't quite want to be trapped in the story it has to tell?#but between the level that has the bodies on the meathooks #and the scene with the bodies hanging from the rafters or whatever that was and garrett living in a clock tower #because the game is very much ALMOST about changing times and authoritarian violence and capitalism #(like. by virtue of how the story sort of spins out i think it misses it's mark on a lot of stuff here #in the sense that i dont feel like it actually wants to tell that story. it wants to. go in a different direction. or at least walk on top #of those themes instead of through it)#ANYWAY between all of those things. it does kind of live in my head rent free. they did create a compelling setting #SHAME THEY DIDNT WANT TO ACTUALLY EAT ANY OF IT #unrelated but i would've given thi4f a 10/10 if they kept garrett's fucking nail polish from the concept art. cowards. unforgivable #thief the dark project #i still have no idea how to tag the game series as a whole RIP #sorry for the dedicated dark project fans. if you know what the general series tag is. please let me know #garrett thief #basso thief

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deus-and-the-machina · 9 months ago

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hythlodaeus be like "teehee I hope I can be of some use" *clean headshot* 😊

bitch they wanted you for the aether-centric governmental position I know you think your curmudgeony cunt husband is amazing but stop selling yourself short its a slippery slope to sacrificing yourself to make god smh

#final fantasy xiv #ffxiv #im glad ee3 confirmed hes downplaying his own abilities bc soooooo many people just take characters at their word in this game #im always curious as to how his esteem issues developed I dont think its as simple as 'society' bc hes pretty accomplished in the context o #said society they wanted him on the convocation! hes in charge of a whole bureau and that doesnt mean no one ever made him feel bad and we #know erichthonious got mocked though his situation is more actively extreme but the main example of something hyth cant do is transformatio #which is considered preposterous to do in front of others most of the time so it seems like it wouldn't matter too much. maybe its moreso #that he sees others as better and more deserving and is constantly comparing himself and seeing others be better at him in certain areas #started to develop those esteem issues #siren says #funny post which is a trap for my character musings anyways #hythlodaeus

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arachred · 3 months ago

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can i be so honest for a second and talk about how the danganronpa fandom had (has) one of the worst cases of devastating mischaracterization in fanwork that ive ever come across or is this a hyperfixation of mine that i should just stay silent about until i get over it again

#danganronpa #IN 2024??????#i say as if this account didnt start as a klance sideblog a few months ago #2024 is the year for resurgences #at least im not alone have you seen tiktok lately?#danganronpa is BACK and i dont know how to feel about it #but i am sufficiently trapped #danganronpa trigger happy havoc #danganronpa goodbye despair #sdr2 #danganronpa v3 #drv3 #dr #i wont even have to tag their names for you to know which characters im talking about #(its all of them but some... some definitely have it worse and you KNOW who)

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scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde · 5 months ago

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I've said it before, I'll say it again, and I'm sure it won't be the last time. I AM SICK AND BLOODY TIRED OF THESE MFS, HALF OF WHO DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT CURSED CHILD, BITCHING AND MOANING ABOUT AN ANGSTY TEEN DARING TO BE AN ANGSTY TEEN, I WILL FIGHT THE LOT OF YOU

(this is gonna be a bit long and probably incoherent so sit down and fucking listen to me 🔫 stick with me because I'm not just complaining about albus haters)

eVERYBODY wants cOoMmpllEeXx relatable HUMAN characters - and then SHIT themselves when the flaws a CHILD has isn't just 🥺 uwu im socially awkward and traumatised 🥺. that's why scorpius doesn't get this fuckass treatment, because his terrible human flaw is that he's a bit shit at conversation and gets sad about his dead mum (generalised understatement, but this post isnt about him. dont come for me i love him 🫶🏻)

god forbid albus, who feels unloved and unwanted (with valid evidence for a teenager), albus who feels completely out of place and outcast from his entire famously-close-knit family, ablus who is well known by the world by default via Harry and hates the attention and high expectations, albus who then gets targeted and bullied by his peers because he's not as perfect and brilliant as his father, albus who is then isolated from his one friend because Harry is making irrational ptsd fueled decisions, albus who tells Harry completely sincerely that he knows he's unlikeable but he'll try and change himself and be more like his siblings because he genuinely believes that's what Harry and everyone else whos had the misfortune of meeting him wants, albus who spends the entire play trying to prove himself and fix things via idiotic childish decisions BECAUSE HES A WHOLE UNSTABLE CHILD

god forbid that CHILD doesn't react like a patient, supported, well adjusted, level headed adult. god forbid he reacts outwardly. god forbid he reacts at all, my bad. clearly he should just sniffle a bit as if he doesn't feel suffocated and helpless by everything in his life, because obviously hes just a spoiled brat who doesn't know what real suffering is. god forbid he complains or feels anything negatively, or doesn't quite grasp that other people are struggling too because he is too busy trying so hard to deal with himself and his declining mental health the best he can with basically no support or understanding. god forbid he isn't completely perfect.

you all sound like some fucking boomer telling teenagers they don't know what real struggling is, they aren't mentally ill, they dont have any problems because they have a roof over their head, they should all go to war kids are too soft these days 😫😖😱 fUCKING‼️SHUT UP‼️

he does things wrong but he knows he does and he does everything he can to fix it! and he is fourteen!!! do none of you remember what being fourteen is like 😭😭 I swear half of you have got to be basically fourteen yourselves cmon man

cause I'm seeing this fucking pattern a lot recently. not just for albus, not just in this fandom, everywhere. ‼️ no one can fucking handle flawed characters anymore ‼️ the only thing any character is allowed to have wrong with them is trauma apparently, otherwise they have to be perfect, and I'm getting sick of it. characters and stories are meant to reflect real life, they're meant to help shape our world view, why are you expecting everyone to be fucking perfect??? what happened to nuance? what happened to understanding character development? you are all acting like characters and people are so black and white. either they're perfect or they're insufferable and evil. I won't lie, the most common victims i've noticed of this are women. but the flawed women are typically demonised, whereas the men are typically turned into uwu baby boys who actually aren't capable of doing anything wrong and then fanon goes nuts making them into ittle wittle victims. and I'm so fucking sick of all of it, I hate this. (obviously this is not a strict rule. Albus Potter, and also Albus Dumbledore now I mention it, are demonised beyond belief)

BRING BACK FLAWS AND BRING BACK NOT COMPLETELY WRITING OFF A CHARACTER BECAUSE THEY DARE TO BE HUMAN

I AM FED UP, ALBUS POTTER GET BEHIND ME

#he did many things wrong BUT I PROMISE YOU HE IS MORE AWARE THAN YOU ARE #HE HATES HIMSELF MORE THAN YOU EVER COULD #this post has been building a lot because i just kEEP SEEING ALBUS HATERS AND ITS DRIVING ME INSANE #i am albus potters defence lawyer actually #also eloise bridgertons i am seeing far too many people jumping on that hate train #i know shes going through her im not like other girls i hate pink phase but OF COURSE SHE IS #SHE LIVES IN THE 1800S WOMEN ARENT ALLOWED TO DO SHIT SHE FEELS TRAPPED IN A BOX AND ALL SHE SEES IS OTHER PEOPLE PLAYING THEIR PARTS #i could talk about her a lot more but this isnt the time or place 😔✋🏻 eloise bridgerton they could never make me hate you #also sansa stark i havent even watched game of thrones but i would fight to the death to defend her #her only crime was being a naive child and yet people hate her mercilessly #these are the people coming to me off the top of my head but there are countless fucking others #we are witnessing the death of media literacy and the death of nuance and its killing me i cannot fucking do this #i sincerely hope anyone complaining about al dont ever have teenage children because they will be shit at supporting or understanding them #hpcc #harry potter #albus potter #scorpius malfoy #years spent on tumblr and i still dont know how to tag #albus severus potter #harry potter and the cursed child #scorbus #is it cheeky if i tag bridgerton or game of thrones?#it feels cheeky 😔#the marauders #tagging that too because that fandom are fucking perpetrators of this #(said as someone in it dont come for me)

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subaru-copilot · 1 month ago

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i'm sorry but daniel's partner being the same age as max and max's partner being the same age as daniel it's really funny like they are not beating the allegations, this does not help the rumours

#the fact that they both are f1 drivers daughters too please #and max too?#daniel is trapped in the nepo baby world #this feels so much like a joke #i just dont know the punchline #f1 rpf #maxiel

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thecultoflove · 2 months ago

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𝘪 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘷𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘦𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘮𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘲𝘶𝘰𝘳, 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘦

𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘪 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮 𝘪 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘪𝘵

#dhmis #dont hug me im scared #larry the lamp #shrignold the butterfly #cupid's art box #dhmis au #heaven by solya is the EXACT REASON this art turned into this. THIS IS WHY I CAN'T GET INSPIRED?? EVER?? BY MUSIC?? oh my god #between solya and baby bugs i feel so SICKKK. i can't draw anything with either of their songs playing...#you guys should look at my art (leans up against expensive toy barbie car because i dont drive #don't seek me i'm trapped #i have therapy tomorrow should i show her this /JOKE #bedbug dhmis #oh go #implying religious trauma honestly on shrignold's end and implying dissociation on luci's #they're so over

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storge · 1 year ago

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He gave me the lotus seeds and suggested we live.

Moon in the Day (2023)

#moon in the day #mitdedit #kdramaedit #userdramas #kdrama #asiandramanet #kdramadaily #asiancentral #dailyasiandramas #perioddramaedit #asiandramasource #pyo ye jin #kim young dae #mymymy #what is this.. I dont knowwww but i love them and I loved these shots lololol #i do llike that girliee is growing feeling for boiii but that the marriage was not a fun choicewilling matter #he tried to help her escape like woahhhh yeahhh he all in for you girlieeee you all trapped now #and that makes the whole final murder scene even more !!!!???

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datcravat · 1 year ago

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I see people hyping up Bridget being trans but I still don't fully get what being trans is about?? Is he trans because he wears "girly" clothes even tho everyone says clothes have no gender?? 😭 or because he looks cute? but being cute is not a girl only thing?

She is transgender, the creator of the game has expressed this and it's her story arc in Guilty Gear Strive. In previous games she still identified as male, but now she's a woman.

As with real life, her gender is not derived via how girly she is, it's derived via what that person says they are.

If you truly do not understand what being transgender means, please use google and other resources!

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