#i don't wanna do it because school restricts my time

[shiningstages]

Me lookin' at my lil content: d'aaaaaaaw it's so cute~

I wanted to do stuff before work, but I like blanked out since I'm sleepy (went to bed around 1? 2?? then woke up at 7:11; not terrible but not like Great) then did my required stretchies / looked up stuff for things~ Tomorrow I have my last PT session and follow-up, and then I plan on cleaning my room / generally just chilling out since it has been Forever, but now...I will try and schedule in time for OC thoughts today and tomorrow (still have to decide if Atlas would be primal or astral...and maybe compare some story stuff to make sure it's not stepping on any Canon toes...but maybe we also don't care about that second bit ghffjghfgvcccgkhf).

[deezneezz]

Leona & ADD

I got a few ppl (on twitter) wanting me to elaborate on Leona and ADD, so I figured I will share my thoughts here as well, please be nice it's just a personal hc. You don't have to agree at all!! Since it contains some personal experiences I ask of people to please be kind about it!

Anyway, Leona and ADD.

I think a lot of people usually agree on Floyd and Kalim having ADHD, but Leona actually shows a lot of lesser talked about traits of ADHD. Namely Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), sensitivity to clothing/textures (he doesn't like restrictive clothes).

He also has the more commonly talked about traits of course, executive dysfunction being a big one. And his depression definitely exacerbates these traits, when i was undiagnosed and depressed i used to sleep my entire days away. I wasn't getting anything done anyway.

Not to mention not sleeping properly, so I was desperate to find moments to sleep during the day. I've slept on floors, on toilets, in an abandoned corner in uni instead of going to class. I was just *so* tired all the time I didn't want to sit in class, I wanted to sleep.

I was lucky I passed classes without studying, cause i would've never gotten through uni otherwise. I still took longer than necessary. The moment my support system (Ruggie, anyone?) graduated and left I had no one taking care of my basic needs, and I certainly didn't.

I had a dorm mate who cooked for me, made sure I had even an ounce of self-care, and also looked at my room and said "hmm, Deniz, maybe it's time to clean up a little" and then I very reluctantly admitted that it may have gotten a little out of hand.

She would just sit in my room sometimes chilling around while I cleaned cuz that was one of the few ways I cleaned at all (this is a real thing for ADHD, called body doubling. It works). Ruggie arriving at NRC and Leona suddenly performing tons better in school is no coincidence.

Coming back to RSD.. I mean I don't really have to explain it do I.. book 2, Lilia's scathing remarks, the shame of disappointing his dorm, etc. I know a lot of ppl call book 2 an 'overreaction' but like, this is genuinely what it feels like internally when RSD triggers

book 6 too, Jamil's over-protectiveness is clearly (to the audience) smth that's mostly Jamil's own habits and trauma doing. But to Leona it's a rejection/insult to his ability to take care of himself, his skill, etc. This was genuinely smth that set me off too.

"How dare you try to explain to me smth I already know, do you think I'm stupid?" "You're not like me." The unwillingness to admit that someone may be relatable in any way because making any comparison to yourself makes you vulnerable to what you haven't achieved for yourself.

"I would ace these classes too if I wasted my time and life studying as much as they did, but I actually love myself." <- guy who was jealous and did not know he was coping and didn't study cause of executive dysfunction and concentration issues.

Leona clearly knows a lot about the things he genuinely cares about, Ancient spell language, chess, magishift, so its kind of funny to see him so low effort in classes. Though honestly i know the game also says that "Leona already knows all this stuff" so.. who knows really...

Now I'm more chill but I used to legitimately go off the handle a little cuz RSD doesn't really care about whether the shit u feel is proportional to the offence it physically hurts in your chest and you just wanna burn down the world at that exact time and... IS THAT NOT LEONA...

TLDR: give Leona therapy and meds, lol.

[datesinredink]

Ranking the yandere rottmnt boys by how likely they are to kidnap their darling

Just a little crumb to keep myself from losing my mind while staring at google docs this late at night. Sorry if this is super bad, it's way later at night than I'm used to staying up and election night stressed me the hell out.

Donnie.

I have absolutely no doubts that he's going to at least try very very hard to kidnap you. And honestly, I doubt it would be too hard. He's a highly trained, mystic wielding, tech inventing, mutant ninja turtle. And on top of that, he's very fond of planning absolutely everything. And to finish it all off, I think it would be once in a blue moon that he actually treats his darling as an equal. He already thinks he's better than almost everyone, and when he gets obsessed, he has to make himself feel better about it somehow, so he decides to cope by thinking you need him instead of it being the other way around. As a result, he treats you a bit like a very glorified songbird, and songbirds.. well, aren't they usually put in cages anyway? You won't even care after a week or two of adjustment! (He will get upset if you aren't content with being kidnapped by then, by the way.)

2. Raph

The only reason Raph is behind Donnie on this list is because I think he would take longer to justify it to himself. He thinks you're fragile, that you need to be protected from the harsh world! I mean, he barely trusts his youngest brother, who is also a highly trained ninja, to do a simple mission on his own. How do you think he'll treat you after the obsession sets in properly? Not really as an equal, I'll tell you that. He's much nicer to you than Donnie would be, but he still doesn't respect you enough to let you handle yourself, even if that's not how he sees his behavior. At the same time though... isn't he supposed to be a hero? Do heroes kidnap their darlings? Or would this make him the dragon... In the end though, he'll decide that he's fine with being the dragon so long as he knows that the rest of the world won't be able to run their metaphorical (or maybe literal, depending on how unpopular you are in the area) pitchforks right through your heart.

3. Mikey

Mikey wouldn't just.. outright kidnap his darling, I think. I think it would start with a fun sleepover at the lair! Then he insists you stay just one more day! You're having so much fun, after all! Don't you wanna hang out with your best friend for a while longer? You agree, of course- him and his brothers have been nothing but nice to you ever since you met them, and their company is always a delight, so it's worth a shot, isn't it? Then suddenly, the weekend is over, and school's ready to chew you up again, so you do leave. Then it's finally the weekend again! You've heard of a fun game from your school friends, so you plan on trying it when you get home this afternoon- it's friday, after all- when you get a text from Mikey in the group chat with his brothers. He wants you to come over again- and, of course, you say "sure". Not like you can't just play the game on sunday, or when you go home saturday. The sleepover flies by, but you're a bit weary by the time you're pretty sure you're supposed to go home- but here's Mikey, and he's so sure that you promised you'd stay at the lair until sunday again! So, you give in. There's always next weekend, right...? I think you get the pattern, but eventually, he'll be keeping you at the lair 24/7, and you'll be rubbing at your weary eyes wondering how you got into this mess. Sometimes you can even see his brothers shoot you worried looks.

4. Leo

Leo would only kidnap his darling as a last resort, and I think it's because of two reasons. One, he's the brother who sees you closest to being an equal (Donnie and Raph constantly go against your personal autonomy and Mikey puts you on an extremely restricting pedestal), though to be fair, that's not a high bar to pass- and two he much prefers to have some sort of interesting conflict to be present because he finds it entertaining. His life is a weird, morally incorrect soap opera at this point, and he's the number one viewer. Kidnapping would only really happen with him if he thought you were either seriously leaving him (moving or getting into a serious relationship with someone else) or if the circumstances around him got too stressful and he needed something to cling to for any semblance of support outside his brothers (who, at that point, would probably also be super stressed). Think post movie, when the city is still recovering. Man, he was probably freaking out thinking that you might've died to the kraang.

[mr-damian-s-power]

Why is Eda such a bad teacher?

How does it benefit the show for her to be bad at teaching? Well, I DO know why, because it desperately needed idiotic teen drama. But, for things that happen later on, I think Eda being a bad teacher is detrimental to the 'found family' aspect of the show.

Now, what makes her a bad mentor ? She's extremely lazy and often seems reluctant to teach Luz anything about magic. Most of the time, Luz either has to bribe Eda, blackmail her, or just go off and do something herself. Sure, the 'reluctant mentor' is a common trope, but they normally change in the story. I don't think Eda stops being a lazy teacher. I don't really blame Luz for wanting to go to Hexside considering Eda is gonna be so stubborn about teaching.

Here's the thing, I think that Eda eventually calling Luz and Co. her 'kids' feels unearned. Normally, I love these types of things! Someone calling a person they're not related to their family. But in Eda's case, she hasn't really earned that. Her unwillingness to teach Luz kinda drove her away, and now she's at the school Eda badmouths.

Secondly, there's the weird decision to have Eda open a school in the epilogue. Why? Why would she do that? She could barely teach ONE kid! Once again, it feels unearned. This is added onto my issue with the fact that it feels like the only reason Eda is a Wild Witch is so she can be lazy and doesn't have to get a proper job. She doesn't show much interest in magic or what she could do with it since she's not tied down by Coven rules, at least as far as I could see.

Here's my solution to this, and a little something extra:

-

In this hypothetical rewrite, Eda is very passionate about learning multiple types of magic, and so becomes a Wild Witch because she refused to simply pick one. One day, Luz shows up and begs to be her apprentice. Eda is still her grumpy and snarky self, so says no at first. Luz shows that she's not going to take no for an answer and is adamant she wants to learn magic. Eda chooses to humour her, reasoning the Human will give up in a few day's time.

But, a few days pass, and Luz is no less enthusiastic about learning magic than she was on day one. She's not just a kid way in over her head, she's genuinely determined to learn magic. Here's where we see that Eda is a very good teacher. She's more than willing to teach an eager young mind about magic, even if that kid can't naturally do magic. She'll still pass all of her knowledge onto Luz and teach her in areas that she can learn, such as potions.

Here's where another idea comes in. Owl House loves to think that it's very clever with 'subverting fantasy tropes', so here's one they should have done; Hexside is boring! The magical school is basic, rudimentary, formulaic and by-the-numbers. Eda badmouthing it makes more sense this time around, as it has an environment that restricts free thinking and creativity. Luz, in her naivete, is ecstatic about the chance to go there.

"Hexside? Pfft! Why would you wanna go to stuffy old Hexside? They don't teach ya THIS at that gilded prison!"

"It's a magic school, Eda! Think of all the things I could learn! Maybe they'll have a way Humans can do real magic!"

"Kid, Hexside is where creativity goes to die!"

"Come on, it can't be THAT bad!"

"Hmph, you think? Alright then, go there for one day and come back to me to see how it was!"

The next day, Luz sneaks into Hexside to see what it's like. There, she is bored to tears! The whole day is just reading through old textbooks, with little to no actual magic performing. When she asks about more exciting methods, her ideas are laughed at. While there, she can meet friends in Willow and Gus, who are just as sad in being restricted in their magic abilities. They want to expand their knowledge, but the curriculum just won't allow it. Later that day, Luz walks back to the Owl House with her head low.

"So, how was Hexside?" Eda asks smugly, to which Luz just sighs and sits down beside her, resting her chin on her hands. Eda's smile slowly vanishes as she realises that the events of today have very clearly upset the Human. "Not everything it was cracked up to be?" She asks, taking on a more sympathetic tone.

Luz tells how it was so boring and uneventful. Nothing like what she'd read a magic school could be like. Eda's only response is to shrug and say, "That's Hexside! The joy graveyard! Just stick by me, kid, I'll get you through this!" In this story, Eda is the 'fun teacher', who's exciting lessons contrast with the mundanity of Hexside.

The next time she has a lesson, Luz invites her new friends. Once again, Eda isn't sure about them, until they too prove that they truly do wish to learn more. This should have been Eda's character! She takes learning magic very seriously and won't stand for people who aren't 100% onboard.

As they have more lessons and the kids bond with their teacher, Eda's heart is melted by her new students and their antics. They bring her out of her shell, to the point where she stops referring to them as simply 'kids' and starts calling them 'my kids'. Their found family is far more organic!

Then, since Eda is so invested in educating young minds to her best abilities, this makes it all the more satisfying and earned when she opens a school once Belos has been defeated. She showed an interest in teaching, and got her dream job!

-

Thoughts?

[seonghw4ffles]

daydream

" it's your world, and i'm just in it. "

playing boy in luv, after school, happy fools ...

hongjoong x fem!reader

au: highschool

genre: grumpy!reader x sunshine!hongjoong, pure fluff, bad test score comfort, hongjoongs cocky but not really, first kiss

w/c: 1.4k

summary: you don't understand what went wrong. you're known to be the winner of these competitive exams, as the top a-grade student of the entire school, and it seems like your reputation has now been crushed. as the scoreboard was displayed, your name didn't fit in second place. your eyes, widened, follows north to the victor, and you're now in greater shock at who it is. kim hongjoong? how is he there?? he's absent less than half the time, class clown, and a jerk. he is the last person you could ever guess who held the capability of defeating you.

tw: ice cream, especially mint chocolate if that tells you anything, drenching rain, skibidi toilet idk

note: yeah if u could guess yea i got an ass test score and its the WORST when ur a perfectionist yeah this is just pure comfort, its NOT proofread cuz i just rambled on and on w this, and its so rushed for A REASON chat oh and also i wanna get back at him for hating my favourite ice cream flavour.

"heyyyy…"

hongjoong stands as he listens through the bathroom door, hearing the sobs of his nightmares. his ears instinctively presses to the gap between the door and the wall.

"hongjoong, go away."

"that's not nice."

he is genuinely inexperienced in this type of situation. he never cared, because he had nobody to comfort anyway, but at this moment, he wishes he spent his whole life studying therapy. he lightly trembles on his feet only listening to you cry. he does not know what to say.

"do… do you want to talk about it..?" he asks gently.

"you already know."

"yeah, but…"

hongjoong's fists clench. he always thought it was easy to comfort someone, but he now realises how impossible it seems to be. he strikes the restrictive, annoying door with his fist out of irritation.

"stop crying."

"get lost."

hongjoong loudly groans, slumping against the bathroom door downwards to end up sitting on the dirty floor. despite the crowds walking around the corridors to leave the school like escaping from a torture chamber, he can hear your crying way too clearly. he knows he probably looks crazy to be sitting against the door of the women's bathroom, but it is quite literally the last thing he is concerned about. you cannot ruin your own reputation if you never had one at all.

"come onn, 82% is not bad at all," he whines, really trying his best to convince you.

"compared to my other test scores, it looks disgusting."

your voice cracks, and so does hongjoong.

he slowly turns to look at the door. "hey… if it makes you feel better, wooyoung got 59%," he says, gently and affectionately, in hopes that it would comfort you.

"i don't care about wooyoung."

hongjoong slams his fist against the door once again.

"you're being annoyinggggg!! just come ouuutttt!!!!!!"

"no."

he groans again, loudly, leaning his head back. the stubbornness is killing him, and hongjoong is not one for patience. he never understood why a boy would want to sit against a public womens bathroom all for a girl… until you. however, all that frustration suddenly dissolves after he hears you giggle.

his head snaps up, and his heart flutters.

"y/n, if you come out, we can go to the park and get ice cream. i'll pay. to make you feel better."

˖ ࣪⭑

"there were 15 choices, and out of every single flavour, you chose mint chocolate??" he mumbles, looking sickened by the strange green coloured ice cream you're grasping. he sounds as if he did not intend for you to hear, as if he was merely saying aloud of what's on his mind.

"you don't like mint chocolate??" your head snaps as you reply, more than surprised.

"i don't understand why people would like such a thing."

"i don't think i can continue talking to you anymore."

"why would you like something that tastes exactly like toothpaste?"

"toothpaste?!-" you repeat loudly, now leaning your head lower to investigate him as he mindlessly consumes his ice cream, rising in astonishment the longer this topic is being talked about. your friend, seonghwa, has the same view and oftenly uses the same point against you. you sometimes wonder why everyone that knows you is always against you in almost everything. 

"you're literally eating rainbow flavour. you can't be more shallow than that," you rebut.

"what?"

"mint adds personality. rainbow flavour... what are we? five??"

he is bewildered by what you said.

"EXCUSE ME?!?>>!?!>?!?!!??!>?!" hongjoong exclaims. "i got the highest of the whole school, thank you very much, little miss smarty girl or whatever."

being the competitive person you are, the topic brought up annoys you. you're still tremendously salty about the outcome of that event. you really expected to be first, like all those other times.

he is one great child of mischief. he listens to no one, and is involved in every physical fight. schoolwork is nothing to him, considering his awful reports of missing assigments. however, you are the complete opposite. sure you're straight a's but you also work hard, hence the term 'lazy genius' throws you off the most.

hongjoong seems visibly amused by your silence, as if nothing was funnier.

you huff. "how did you get FULL MARKS on that damn test??"

"oh," he laughs. "math is easy."

"go away from me," you immediately respond.

"heehee~~"

but despite that, you never felt so easily reassured after such a plight like that until now. sure, you're disappointed, but the stroll with hongjoong strangely makes everything okay.

the conversations turned into silence, enjoying the outside, appreciating the beauty of the city. and maybe, just subtly, each other as well.

nothing felt more fulfilling.

you walk across the city, greatly dazzled by a few paintings displayed on the exterior of a building. "you like art?" you ask hongjoong, witnessing the way he immerses in them. he never appeared to be one with a passion for such things. "yeah. i can't create art, though, which is a shame."

unlike him, you liked creating art a lot. you were known to be a good artist by many. in fact, there was a temporary art exhibition held at your school not long ago, involving pieces developed by countless students, including yours. you remember him being the last one there as a guest after everyone left satisfied, although couldn't recall a piece with his name.

"you spent a lot of time at the school's exhibition."

"it's really cool that i'm within a community of many great artists."

it's indeed very odd for a clown like him to appreciate something so much, especially one that involves the most patience, such as art.

"hongjoong, which painting was your favourite?" you ask, your eyes gazing at the public creations drifting past as you walk.

"truthfully? yours," he says with no hesitation.

you slowly turn towards him, quite unexpected of that answer. "huh?"

"yours. whenever i observe them, i feel like i'm somewhere else. a dream, perhaps, rather than mere paint on a canvas."

he catches you surprised, and he smiles.

you never really felt this flattered. nobody complimented your art with such sincerity. maybe this hongjoong guy in your class isn't as bad as you depicted him to be.

the walk continued, and it was wonderful.

˖ ࣪⭑

"it's OKAY that you're upset! it's a GOOD thing!!"

he laughs, breaking free from under the umbrella to spin around in the soaking rain. hongjoong turns to you with an invincible, illuminant smile.

all you could do was dread school, everything, after that test score.

but despite the desperately falling rain, the cold breeze and the faded sunshine, he remains happy. it seems as if there is truly nothing he fears. he stands out in the darkness. he has the glamorous ability to make an environment so suffocating into a moment so beautiful. before hongjoong, you never noticed the refreshing smell of dew that blooms in wet weather, or the raindrops creating beautiful rings on the puddles of the ground. yet, you still cannot decide if hongjoong's mysterious enthusiasm was rather impressive or just infuriating.

"can you just… stop being so… you, right now?"

you stop walking, tightening your grip on the umbrella while staring right at him, watching him pause and turn around.

you both stare in silence at one another, your surroundings of the threatening winds and rain now feeling louder than before. in merely a few words, the adrenaline mood that hongjoong has constructed has now vanished within the harsh winds. the sudden tension causes you to instantly drown into deep regret.

"hongjoong… i just-"

you are cut off by his large, sudden step towards you. he holds out his hand, and you flinch at the sudden touch from your cheeks to your soaked hair. he hides a stream carefully behind your ear as he gazes. his fingers felt so soft and gentle, despite that it is the hands of your greatest academic rival. he smiles, and you feel as though he has reached through you and mended your stone-cold heart.

he brings his face closer, now inches away.

"i know," he mutters. it is the only few words you needed to recover.

"as much as i like you, y/n, i'm going to kindly decline that offer."

he was quiet, but was close enough for you to listen to every word he says and every detail of his voice. his voice sounds treasuring, his words felt soothing, and the way your name leaves his mouth makes you a little happier.

and he kisses you.

he kisses you like there was nothing else in the world. like the rain wasn't pouring, like the cars weren't tumultuous. you felt warm.

you were unable to fully comprehend this entire situation before he already stepped backwards. his smile remains wide, despite his completely soaked frame, continuing to be a target for the clouds to rain on.

"now, if you continue to waste time, i'm dragging you home before you catch a cold."

[charliesangel67]

reader in which tom and reader have been friends since first year but over the time tom has grown rather fascinated with her. Tom has had wet dreams about reader for some time so when he and the reader ends up sharing a bed he is nervous about having one when he's in the same bed with her. If you're comfortable I would really like it if he has a wet dreams and whispers in his sleep saying reader's name. Then reader hears it, tom wakes up embarrassed but reader teases him a little then make his dream come true (oral sex female receives then regular sex) and please make tom a little bit submissive.

Thank you in advance, sorry it's a big request!!<3

More than just friends

Tom Riddle x Fem!reader

Authors note: hii guys, so this was a request from @cedricswife - lmk if yall want a pt 2. Ahhh, omg I really hope yall enjoy this, and if you do, don't forget to like and reblog. Also guys, please request fics if you want, I'm more than happy to write them. I will also be making a tag list soon, so just comment your name/@ and what kind of fics you wanna be tagged it eg. Tom riddle, Bucky barnes....

This story is set in the same time as when the Golden Trio were at Hogwarts.

Warnings: Soft!Tom, SMUTT, oral fem!receiving, unprotected p in v sex. Fluff.

Word count- 2620

I met Tom in first year, in the great hall at the Slytherin table. At first he was staring daggers at me, then he took a seat next to mine and started a conversation. I was shocked to say the least. Tom terrified me, but he seemed truly fascinated with me. Since that day on, we were inseparable. We always sat together in class and we hung out so often that most boys were even scared to ask me out because they knew Tom’s reputation and that he would hurt them if they tried something with me. “Tom, this is actually pissing me off.” I complained as I walked into my dorm room, knowing that Tom would be sitting at my desk doing his homework. “Mmh, what is it love?” He asked in his brisky British accent that made me feel butterflies in my stomach. “Not a single guy will ask me out because they’re all either scared of you, or assume we’re dating because we hang out so much.” I whined. “And? At least I don’t have to worry about you running to me every month because you got dumped or because your man was being an ass.” He responded calmly. “Oh my lord Tom. Whatever.” I countered, annoyed at him.

Over the Christmas holidays, Tom and I would stay at the Castle, playing chess and talking until midnight. We talked about starting fifth-year and about our chosen classes. Then of course the Yule Ball and the school trip to London. “Okay, how would you feel about a second floor room, with a balcony and a view of the city?” I asked Tom over a cup of hot chocolate and a game of cards. “I’m not sure Love, are we even allowed to choose our room mate?” Tom asked with a chuckle. “I don't care, I’m gonna find a way so that we can be in the same room, because I do not want to share a room with any other smelly boys or bitchy girls.” “You are kidding right? The other week you were complaining to me that I was restricting your chance of getting a boyfriend. And you called me smelly?! Who do you think you are?” “Well clearly your favourite because I’m the only person you hang out with other than Draco.” I countered, “And yeah, I’ve changed my mind about wanting a boyfriend, Cormac tried to hit on me the other day and it was a disgusting experience.” I laughed off. What I didn’t notice however was the glint in Tom’s eyes as he watched me laugh, he found my smile so attractive, and he found me so fascinating. 

It had been a week since Tom and I hung out in the common room that December night. Students were returning from their Christmas holidays even though classes didn’t start for another 5 days. This did give me more time to talk to Professor McGonagall about the room situations for our upcoming London trip. However, I didn’t see Tom all night, not in the common room, in any of the classes or even in the Great Hall. But I knew Tom well enough to know that if he does not want to be found then he won’t let himse;f be found. That night however, against my knowledge, Tom was dreaming about me. Nothing sweet of course, in fact it was all dirty. Tom dreamt of fucking his best friend, of giving her head, of playing with her tits and hearign her moan his name. It was what he had longed for ever since fourth-year when she complained to him about not being able to get a boyfriend because of him. That made Tom proud that people thought he was y/n’s boyfriend and that she was safe from all these disgusting boys that only want to use her for her body, like Cormac. Tom wasn’t sure what Cormac did or said to y/n but he was sure it wasn’t something very nice if she didn’t feel comfortable sharing it, even with him.

These dreams went on and on for the next couple of days. Tom couldn’t control it, he just dreamt if fuckign his best friend over and over again. Then came the day, it was mid April of fifth-year and the students were getting ready to leave for London. That included Tom and y/n. “C’mon Y/n, have you got your stuff packed for the trip?” Tom asked as he sat outside my dorm with his one duffle bag, “Yeah, I think so. Can I get a bit of help please.” I asked as I struggled to carry my bags out of my room. “We are going away for 5 days y/n. Why do you need so many bags?” Tom asked as he grabbed my suitcase and duffle bag. “Because I just do.” I replied.  Tom then helped me carry my 3 bags out to the Great Hall where everyone was meeting so that we could get the Thestral-Carriages to take us to Hogsmead station. Naturally, Tom and I sat in the same compartment on our entire 10 hour train trip to London. We talked, and I sat in silence when Tom read but otherwise, it was a pretty boring trip. So boring in fact that we even started playing smash or pass whenever someone walked by our train compartment. “Okay, her?” I asked as Cho Chang, a Ravenclaw girl we only know from the D.A organisation walked past our compartment, “Hard pass, you know I have a type y/n.” Tom opposed, “Yeah, okay. Sorry.” I responded, putting my hands up in defeat. “What about him?” Tom asked, “Ooh, I don’t know. I’d probably say smash for him.” I shrugged, “What? You’d smash Blaise?” Questioned Tom, clearly jealous at my response. “Yeah, he’s hot. What’s your problem? Are you jealous?” I teased. Tom, not one to express his feelings, just shrugged and ignored my remark because he knew I was right but he just didn’t want to admit it. 

“Welcome to London Tom. The city of money and horrible weather. How do you feel about being here?” I asked him. “I want to kill myself.” He replied dryly, but somehow managed to sneak a little smile when he saw my smile at his snide remark. The smile didn’t go unnoticed by me. The professors led the fifth-year students to the exit of the station and to a pick up area. I saw taxi drivers holding signs that read surnames and I giggled at a few of them, elbowing Tom a couple times so that we could giggle at some of the names together. It was already past 7pm when we got off the train, so waiting for the bus took us up to about 7:20. Then I spotted a purple night bus arriving at the exit where the Hogwarts crowd was assembled. “Okay students, can we please be respectful as we board the bus.” Professor McGonagall yelled over the chatter as the fifth-years started boarding the night bus. A man named Stan Shunpike greeted us at the entrance of the bus. It didn’t take anymore than 10 minutes to arrive at the hotel that the school had booked for us to stay at in London. 

Upon entering the hotel lobby, the professors went to the main reception to get the keys for the rooms. “Alrighty students, please listen up for your names.” announced Professor Lupin, one of my favourite teachers. “Harry, Ron, Hermione and Parvati are all in room 214. Susan, Padma, Justin and Vincent are all in room 215……..”  At one point I completely zoned out from what Professor Lupin was talking about until I felt Tom pull on my sleeve, “C’mon y/n.” “What?” I asked him, completely distracted, “We are in a room together, room 236.” Tom responded. “Just us two?” I questioned. “Please try and listen next time y/n. Yes, just us two in one room, in one bed, unfortunately, due to us being the only Slytherin boy and girl that get along so well that even the teachers think we are dating, so they put us in a room together.” Tom continued, clearly not phased by us sharing a bed. I was struggling to catch up with his speed as he was basically running up the stairs with all my luggage. I came to an abrupt stop when Tom stopped to open our room door. It was a nice, crisp bedroom, 1 large king sized bed, a walk in closet and a large bathroom. “Gee, I think we won the jackpot with this room.” I announced as I threw myself onto the bed. I was quite sure I saw Tom smirk as he locked the door, I then felt his strong hands grip my legs and pull me off the bed, laughing as I protested and kicked him lightly. “Put me down Tommy.” I yelled, Instead of putting me down, he threw me back onto the bed. “Just so you know, You’re the only person that can call me Tommy.” he smirked and pointed at me, a single strand of hair falling out, in front of his face, inviting me to brush it away, Tom looking way too sexy for me to only want him as a friend. 

That night as we both got ready for bed, I panicked, releasing I only brought my sexy pj’s incase I got lucky one night, and not my comfy ones. Tom, noticing me in distress, asked what was wrong. “What’s wrong Love?” “I brought the wrong pj’s.'' I groaned. “Why? What’s the problem with these?” Tom asked, I held them up for him to see and I heard him whistle. “What?” I laughed, “Well I think you bought the wrong pair, where did you buy them anyway? Sexyland?” He asked. I let out a chuckle, leaning forward as I laughed, unknowingly giving Tom a clear view of my cleavage and the top of my breasts. I heard him take a strong breath and I noticed him adjusting his pants a little as I got up to have a shower, brushing off the reactions from Tom as nothing. After my shower, when I walked out in my pj’s I knew Tom would have some kind of reaction, like any average teenage boy when they see more boobs than expected. It was already awkward sleeping in the same bed as my boy bestfriend who I have known since we were 11, but then me sleeping in pj’s that showed half my boobs and him sleeping in nothing but a pair of boxers made it just a little bit more awkward.

I seemed almost like our roles were reversed. Instead of me falling asleep first and Tom staying up until past midnight reading, It was him who fell asleep first. It couldn’t have been much past 10 o’clock when I heard my name being said. It was muffled so it could’ve most likely come from another room, but as I leaned over to the bedside table to put my book in the drawer and turn the small night light off, I realised that it was Tom who was calling my name. Not even calling it, he was moaning my name. I started shaking his body, trying to wake him up. “Tom, wake up.” I whispered. “What is it y/n?” He groaned. “Why the fuck are you moaning my name in your sleep?” I asked him as he rolled over to face me. “What do you mean?” He asked, “I mean, why the fuck are you moaning my name? Are you having wet dreams or some shit?” I questioned. I saw Tom blush and that was how I knew I was right. “Oh my gosh” I teased, “My best friend since first year has secretly had a crush on me.” I giggled. “How do you feel about that?” Tom asked. “Well, I am glad that you feel the same way.” I announced, clearly surprising Tom because he thought only he felt that way.

“Well, why don't we reenact what you dreamt of Tommy” I told him, noticing a smile creep upon his lips. “I would love that.” He responded. “So, tell me. How did your dream start?” I asked as I let Tom take control of my actions. “Well, first,” Tom didn’t even finish his sentence before he pulled my pj shorts down and dived straight into my pussy. I moaned and pulled at his hair as he licked through my folds and his lips attached to my clit. “Oh fuck Tommy, I didn’t know you had such a mouth on you.” I moaned. I heard Tom chuckle and look up into my eyes smirking, “Do I make you feel good doll?” “Fuck yes.” I moaned, “‘Should’ve just fucked me in third-year when I complained to you about not getting a boyfriend.” I laughed, quickly replaced by a moan as Tom sucked on my clit. “Oh shit, I’m close Tommy, please.” “You gonna come sweet girl?” He asked, returning his attention to my clit. “Mmh, yes please Tommy, please.” I shrieked, as I came undone on Tom's tongue. “Fuck, you taste so good sweet girl.” he moaned as he continued eating my pussy, and licking up my juices. 

“Oh fuck Tom, stop teasing just stick it in already.” I moaned when Tom finally thrusted his thick cock inside my wet pussy. “Oh shit, you feel so good doll.” Tom moaned, thrusting in and out of my soaking cunt, earning moans and mumbled words from me. “Mmh” I hummed, feeling the tip of his cock hitting that perfect spot every single time. “Fuck, angel you feel so good, so tight around my cock,” he kept thrusting harder in and out of my pussy. Harder, Faster, Stronger. “Oh fuck… fuck…fuck.” all I could utter were moans and swears of pleasure. “Oh, you make me feel so fucking good Tommy,”  this made Tom go even harder, hitting my g-spot and every right spot in my cunt. Tom placed his thumb on my clit, massaging it in circles and whispering in my ear, “You gonna come all over my cock sweet girl?” “Yes please Tommy, Please.” Tom increased his speed on my clit and thrusted harder into my pussy. I felt his cock twitch inside me, knowing that he was close, then he pulled out. I groaned in annoyance at his actions, “I want you to ride me, I want you to control me and make yourself come.” Tom said. I cradled his thighs, sinking down on his cock once again. “Oh fuck,” I moaned “I’m gonna ride you until I pass out.” I announced, causing Tom to look at me surprised. “Are you really?” he asked, smirking as I started bouncing on his cock. I bounced and rode his cock, meanwhile massaging my clit, moaning Tom's name as he started thrusting up into my cunt. “You gonna come inside me Tommy?” I asked, his cock twitching inside me. “Fuck yes.” He groaned in pleasure, securing his hands on my hips, guiding me on his cock. Finally, I breathed in deeply, giving myself one more push on my clit, arching my back as I came undone again. Tom’s cock twitching rapidly before he came inside my pussy. “Oh fuck,” we both moaned as I rode out our high. 

“Shit Tom, why have you been keeping that from me all this time?” I asked, laughing a little while I lay, cuddling with Tom. “Well, you never showed any interest in me, so I never asked you to be my girlfriend.” “Will you be my boyfriend Tommy?” “Sure doll.” he responded with a smile. 

[astranne]

— HALFBLOOD

a greek/roman mythology x blue lock series

— synopsis ;

„blessed we are, they all say, the ones who don‘t understand“, you whisper and trace the shape of his lips with your finger.

„blessed we are, say the stories of old, say our legacies, the mortals who only hear the glory and fame of the tales“, you continue, while he takes a shuddering breath. your words hit hard but they are the truth.

„i say we‘re cursed. cursed to be born painfully, cursed to life painfully and cursed to die, not only in pain but also alone.“ you lean closer, and it shouldn’t be allowed, when you utter so paining words, whisper the following so softly, as if you confessed him your love.

„and if we ever fall in love… then we shall love with all our heart and mind, until one of us dies. nothing else can destroy the bond we have, because i have given you my soul.“ and you pledge your words with a kiss.

— summary ;

in which you, a halfblood and bastard child of [REDACTED], have a mortal lover who‘s heart only beats for football and you.

— genre ;

may vary from each work, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, suggestive

— warnings ;

each work will have it’s own warnings, will contain spoilers (for non-manga readers), may go really into mythology stories, may be suggestive, may contain curse words, may have different genders than gn!reader in some works

— characters ;

isagi yoichi, bachira meguru, kunigami rensuke, mikage reo, nagi seishiro, itoshi rin, itoshi sae, michael kaiser, noel noa, oliver aiku, julian loki, + more to be added!

— author notes ;

blue lock really has me in a chokehold. so here i am. once again 😭 starting to write this when i should be doing important school stuff... this series has my current obsessions put together, blue lock AND my returning pjo/mythology phase. please note that it will take some time for each piece to be written, as i want them to bit longer than my usual works (more than like 200 words lmao) and i'm in a rather studious phase in school rn. i should definitely not start another series, when i already have an event going on but spare with me. because i think this will just continue to grow and be definitely a longer series, spanning over several weeks. maybe i'll never close it.... requests are closed for this series (for now) until i put a notice on it. i don't wanna kill my currently insane motivation to write with restricting myself. other than that, i think everything has been said. enjoy!

— greek pantheon masterlist ;

aphrodite; divine beauty.

ares; fire in our blood.

itoshi sae x fem!reader

— roman pantheon masterlist ;

…

— taglist ;

@stellumi , @keqism , @wanderersbell , @venexus , @lilikags , @kuminarim , @mael-0 , @dervaaas , @aly4a, @yanfei-kisser , @isentsworld , @tsukishiro-yue2402 , @him3ru , @horologiumwise , @aoi-turtle + more to be added!

-> if you wish to be part of the taglist, which includes every new posted work, please comment below this post or send me a quick ask!

-> if your name is bold, this means i can’t tag you!

ASTRANNE 2023

[ebonysplendor]

Infatuation 💰🏞️

TL;DR: What's worse than running away from one psychopath? Running away from six psychopaths. Even worse than that? They're rich psychopaths, with shmonies. Also, can we make a damn plan and stick to it please?!

Game Link: https://aspenglen.itch.io/infatuation

Notable Features: Self-Insert, Customizable (somewhat), Multiple Endings, Multiple LIs, Yandere LIs, 4+ hours of gameplay Spiciness: 2/5 -- It can get a little flirty and a little spicy here and there, but the main "spice" is when there's an unwanted advance from some of the LIs LI(s) Red Flags: 3.8/5 -- Kidnapping, drugging, nonconsensual sexual advances, tied up, branded, verbal abuse, emotional abuse, physical force

Wanna know more? Meh...I say not unless you're at least 16. There's not an age restriction, buuuuuuuuuut I don't feel like anyone's 12-year-old sibling should be playing this. That being said, I can't do much from behind a screen, so let's get into it!

Just a heads up, the game was long as shit, so this review is going to be long as shit;;

Oh hey. Didn't see ya there. Oh this? This is just my first post in about a month. Thought I'd just...sliiiiide on in here, get thangs swangin' again. Lol but no seriously. It has been a pretty crazy month, but I've finally got enough time and rest at the same time to finally make this review, and aha...

Respectfully...I understand that all good things must come to an end, but damn, I really miss that phase where I was running into all the really good visual novels...

That being said, I know what I said, but hear me out! The game isn't...awful...but I didn't really vibe with it. Like, I know why I didn't vibe with it, but I'd rather wait and get into all of that during the review portion. Hopefully, based on the summary I give you, the review and criticism I have will make sense.

Anyways, this game, interestingly enough, is actually a rendition -- am I using that word right? I believe I am...? -- of a story that was written on Wattpad, and don't act all brand new like you don't know what Wattpad is! You know damn well what Wattpad is because here you are playing and reading visual novels and reviews of visual novels about toxic ass men being a (forced) love interest. Don't try to play me. I'm getting distracted though!

So the name of the story on Wattpad, like the game, is Infatuation, and it's about...well actually, I'm gonna give you a summary of what it's about because this visual novel is based off of it! I was going to give the actual story a read after I finished the visual novel but, uh...

Almost a 24 hour read???? Yeah, no thanks, and you'll hopefully understand why I didn't have much motivation to give it a read after my review.

I'm pretty over yapping in the intro, though, so let's head into the actual game, yeah? As per the usual, I'm going to tell you as much about the game as possible without ruining the game itself. Without a better transition sentence, let's get into it!

So boom.

We're on our way to school, and we meet up with our -- quite frankly -- thirsty ass friends. They're pretty much raving about this new group of boys that had just transferred to our school, because, not only are they super rich, they are, apparently, extremely attractive.

We pretty much brush this off, though, because we're not looking for anything romantic. Honestly, we're barely looking for anything platonic; however, we agreed to be their wingman since we're essentially God-tier at picking up men that we don't want.

That being said, by some weird stroke of luck -- or misfortune, considering we know that this is all going to go very left as the story progresses -- we proceed to run into every single one of them. And I mean

every.

single.

frickin.

one.

of.

them.

Well, kinda? The blond one had a class with the blue-haired guy, us, and the bestie. The purple haired one -- even though it's more of a burgundy? -- was in the vicinity after we had pretty much asked the other boys about him because this was the one that the besties were simping over the most. But the rest? Pretty much had a one-on-one moment with all of them, even if one was extremely douchey.

Anyways, we're kind've going about our days and the besties are still thirstin', and, admittedly, we're getting closer to these guys -- too close. One of our other friends -- his name is Hiroko -- pretty much warns us about them because something just seems real sketchy to him about these guys. That being said, we just kind've brush him off, because it's, like, sir? Who are you to talk about someone being sketchy? Like, lmao mans is a full on delinquent with a whole ass gang and a criminal history with the police, and they can't stand his ass.

He's a good sport about it, though, because even though he's like "You're a full blown dumbass for that", he's like "True, true..." and just warns us to be careful around them. Now mind you, his concern is totally fair, because it's discovered later on that they pretty much fucked up this one kid's world -- you'll have to discover how during your own playthrough, though. I ain't tellin' you all that lmao.

Now, fast forwarding a lot here, shit lowkey starts hitting the fan because the bae comes back in town -- not official bae, but still bae -- and conveniently enough, he is the brother of our two besties

Everyone. This is Kenzen; the man that we're pretty sure is gonna be our husband and baby daddy one day, maybe not even in that order, but those things exactly.

Now, the reason why shit starts hitting the fan is because all of a sudden, the school boys are starting to realize that we already have our future husband picked out. Shit proceeds to get super tense once this knowledge it learned, and the boys are start to slowly but slowly lose their shit. Allow me to show you

Exhibit A: A most vicious side-eye competition

Exhibit B: The OG death grip and growl

and Exhibit C: The comply or choose death, but drunken

Oh, and let's just throw this one in for some added flair.

And definitely this one.

And why would we not add this one?

Yep, the fan was pretty much hit with shit so...yeah lmao. Go ahead and give it a go so you can see how we ended up with the most romantic gift of a necklace and a finger.

Lmao I wasn't joking about the finger by the way.

And now to air all of my grievances...

Lol nah, I'm joking, but also...there's a lot to unpack here.

First off, let's talk about the good!

So...our psychopathic LIs. Can we just acknowledge the diversity? Like, you had your pale guy, your dark guy, your tan guy, your fair skin guy, like...? I seriously appreciate that time was taken out to actually make all the LIs look different from each other and not some copy-paste, change the eye color and hair thing. I absolutely LOVED the diversity of the LIs.

Not to mention, the MC is diverse a well! Granted, like typical, we can't really SEE it except in the occasional CG, but it was just dope that there was even an option, ya know?

Also! The concept of the story was actually pretty solid! Some of the things that happened were interesting, and I definitely had a "...Well, damn ._." moment here and there.

Now for the...not so good.

This flowed like a stereotypical Wattpad story. That's obviously no fault of the dev, but, for me, the point of renditions is to take something and make it a little better or give it some extra flair without ruining what the OG creator intended -- that didn't really happen, and that was honestly what bugged me the most out of everything.

I didn't really care that there'd be strings and strings and strings of dialogue before the next choice finally came up nor did I care that, while it appeared to be choice heavy, it was actually just an illusion on choice where it didn't really matter how you responded to certain things; it just was. But yeah, the pacing was...well, let me expose myself a little (don't come after me. I'm a tiny and cozy blog lol)

If you make posts on tumblr, then you know what this is. For those that don't know and/or can't guess what it is, this shows the interaction that my blog gets or my "activity" more accurately. The reason why I brought this out was because...this was how the story's pacing was.

First, it'd be on a steady progression, and then it'd drone on and on and on into a plateau, but then -- out of no where -- shit will randomly escalate and just take off into this fit of drama...but then it'd quickly drop. There was no real flow, and when there was, it'd be super inconsistent. Not to mention, the wishy-washiness of the MC and the unpredictability of the LIs (which duh, right?), the pacing would just take off and then would come to a dead stop. It's like there was no balance between the narration, the drama, and the transitions to the next scene. Like, yeah, you've gotta story tell, obvi, but don't drone on for-- actually I can show you that as well.

Did you notice how long that clip was? Imagine how long it took to read...

That was just straight up narration, and there was multiple times where this happened. Nothing really happening, no choices to make, just straight up narration. Well, no, I lied a little. Things did happen, but once again, it'd come out of no where. It, quite literally, will go from having a normal conversation, and then the yandere side just comes out totally unprovoked. Like? It's honestly more for shock factor than for story, and it got to a point where I was honestly just tired of the game itself and was wanting it to end...but it ended up being 3 hours longer, and I'm not even joking about that. Once again, I can show you.

This was the point I started getting ill with the game but felt that I was towards the end and pushed on to finish it out

This was when I realized that I was clearly wrong about that being "almost the end" and took pretty much another 3 hours to get through.

And yes, for the most part, I played it in one sitting with the exception of when I got me a little snacky snack and went to pee. Oh? You're curious about what time I started playing?

Around 5 hours beforehand...

Notice that that all says 19 June 2024. I have never been so glad to see the ending screen...

It wasn't even because it was bad! It was just. so. extremely. long. And for, what felt like, no reason to be that long. Granted, I could've stopped and saved and came back, but it always felt like I was either getting to the end or to a good part, and it just never came -- not that there wasn't any good parts, but...never mind, I feel like I make it worse the more I try to explain...

Anyways, the game wasn't awful by any means, but it definitely could use some improvement. The whole thing had good potential, the pacing of it really just killed it for me, and had that been better executed? This would've been a great game, but it's honestly just...decent. It had multiple endings, but outside of each of the yandere LIs' ending? I didn't bother trying to get the others.

Even still, while I don't recommend the game, I think it's still worth giving it a casual playthrough! There's plenty of material to read, and there are some interesting parts! Like I said, it's just a pacing issue. Not to mention the MC was pissing me off with that wishy-washy bullshit. Like, bro, survival is at the top of the list. Why are you making a plan and doing the exact opposite of what you were gonna do? Like, what the fuck is you doin'?!

You'll understand it when you play it yourself so...give it a fair try? Here, I'll even put the link here! Heck, and give the dev some encouraging words and, even though I didn't see it, some monetary support! The game itself was honestly fine! It was just the storytelling needed some work, which lowkey isn't even their fault because it was based off of a Wattpad story (I'll link that again here, by the by).

Okay, this review is about to be the same length as the game. I'm going to go ahead and head out of here. Just to reiterate, the game is free! Giving it a casual playthrough never hurts! I mean, what've you got to lose except about 4 - 6 hours?

Okay, really, I'm out of here now! Remember! Drink water, don't be dumb, and hope to see you around~!

Infatuation

[desifemininewoman]

To all the teenagers who follow my blog:

Please don't take my blog seriously. It's for women who are at completely different places in their lives than you. Right now, your main focus is school. And even if you don't plan to be an engineer or doctor, you would still benefit from having good grades. It would come in handy with whatever field you do decide to go to. I am a design student on 50% scholarship solely based on my performance in high school.

The point is that studying is your only responsibility towards yourself right now, other than making sure you are safe while doing whatever you wanna do.

You are allowed to have fun, date cute boys, do crazy things with your friends. Maybe even make reels on instagram. Be cringe. This is the time to discover yourself and what you like or don't like. The level up content can wait. You have your whole life to focus just on yourself, isolate from the world and think of your future because your are living it now.

If you restrict yourself now, you would regret it when you grow up. These years make you gain important experiences that shape you way more than you realize.

[mapplesand]

my ocs digital footprint is probably hell on earth so let's dive into that for fun lol

they're all pretty active on various social media (instagram, tik tok, twitter, tumblr, reddit ect)

Marco

most of the time it's instagram because everyone in their grade follow each others and Marco is an avid stalkers (mostly to girls)

his first account was banned and he keeps getting suspended or restricted on the one he's using since middle school, he mainly post memes or pictures where you barely see him (like guns he stole to his father and you just see his camo pants and combat boots so you know it's him), the memes are just well, edgy boy humor filled with the dumb horny posting about anime girls

don't go through who he follows, it's a mix of girls from his middle school, girls he knows are in his grade and popular model/onlyfan models (and there's also memes account and shit like that)

his twitter is a lot like that but he's just rambling about dumb shit and tweets about whatever he thinks is pissing him off at the moment, then there's the heavy rt of anime girls, his likes are even worse he's probably happy that no one can see them anymore and he probably likes even more fucked up shit there

Tristan is the only one who replies to what he posts and they often bicker about the dumb shit the other put in their timeline

then there's reddit, because of course Marco is a redditor, that's where he get his memes from, he's not really active per say but sometimes he complains about stuff

here's a list of the subreddit he follows and yes I did browse through reddit for 2 hours mindlessly to find all of them because i have too much free time

then he has tumblr because Tristan uses it and he wanted to test it for himself (he thinks tumblr is the gay equivalent of twitter) he probably just post on tcc even if Tristan tells him not to do that or he'll get banned but he thinks it's funny so he does it anyway

and finally again because of Tristan, he uses AO3 and read fucked up shit on there, probably stuff tagged with "dead dove, no not eat" you probably don't wanna know what he's up to

Tristan

he's less active and more of a lurker, on instagram at least, he's only there to follow artists and probably only post pictures of nature or dumb things like rocks or graffitis on walls idk

only rt drawings on twitter and replies to Marco to complain about the porn he sees on his tl because of him, thing is twitter is also his hideout for following more furry artist and well nsfw artists so Marco is gonna make fun of him for that lol

definitely more active on tumblr tho, he just reblogs a lot of stuff but still gains a pretty average following, he reblogs fanarts and stuff he thinks is funny or relatable, he sometimes lurks on the "evil side" of tumblr as he calls it because of morbid curiosity but stops when it feels too depressing

and then he's a big fanfic reader so of course AO3 is on his top 3 website that he uses a lot, he's embarrassed to admit that he read a lot of smut in there and will never let see anyone his bookmarks

he's just pretty normal with his relationship to social media honestly

Josh

he's just a normal guy who uses instagram and tik tok, he probably has snapchat, whatsapp and you know, stuff that normal people uses

he doesn't have any quirks he post on his stories about parties he's in and that's basically it

Tyler

doesn't post much apart from his drawings on instagram, he follows everyone because David just shows up in his dms and is like "hi tyler if you need to find anyone i follow everyone so i can give you anyone's contact if you need it for group projects !" (David is self proclaimed class representative) so Tyler just wanders on people's profile and well, it's a pretty bad look but he doesnt stalk people on purpose

he probably doesn't do anything on social media, you probably wouldn't know it's him if you dont know him

I do think he has reddit but again it's only about informational stuff (psychology and bombs mainly) or art

when he starts talking to Tristan i'm sure he's gonna both make a tumblr account AND an AO3 account, he knows about it because of Carmen but they probably both push him towards the fandom side of the internet even if he doesnt understand anything

[iamamikcals]

🎀INTRODUCTION🎀

Hey babes ! I am iamamikcals, 🔄51 years old, she/her, french 🥖🇨🇵.

My hobbies are listening to music, watching kdramas, watching my fav YouTubers, counting calories, restricting and working out 'till I pass out (kidding...or am I 🤨).

My "weightloss journey" story :

I remember that the first time I ever got into weight loss was back in middle school. I wanted to be skinny and sh!t and it worked pretty well because I reached 49kg REALLY quickly. Back then restricting was very easy because 1. I was always keeping myself distracted that sometimes I was forgetting that I had to eat (doing my homework, I was always at school, couldn't go and eat outside, ect...) And 2. I didn't know what those m0therfuck!ng calories were... That's why I wasn't stressing about how much I was eating and I was losing at least 1kg per day (I miss the old days 😩😞🙏🏾). Unfortunately my sister caught my quite unhealthy eating habits and forced me to eat and gain all the weight that I lost. Now I wanna get back on track and lose it 'till I see my f*cking bones, 'till I feel like I'm going to faint every time I stand up, 'till I fit in every clothes, 'till I hear those "you are too skinny", "you should eat more" or "you look sick" every time I step outside of my house. But now that I know what calories are and that I don't have anything to keep me distracted because I don't like anything anymore it is way harder than before...but I'll do it. I lost all my personality now that I'm back on my weight loss. I don't like studying anymore, now I only dance to burn the calories, going out with my friends is scary because I know d@mn well that we are gonna eat and the only thought of going to school is stressing me out like crazy, school is scaring me, it makes me wanna kms just by hearing any words related to it and I don't know why...I only go there because it makes starving easier (even tho I can't do a single week at school without skipping a day or two). I can't even talk to my friends because the only thing that I have in mind are calories, what am I gonna eat and why am I so fat. My personality is all about my weight loss now, I hate and love it at the same time. It makes me feel so sad but I only feel alive when I see the number go down the next morning. So i told myself "If I can't be smart then I will be skinny and pretty" because that's the only thing that I know will make me feel like I'm worth it.

Thanks for reading it 💓. I hope you will like this account I will update on my weight loss every day. If you wanna be friends tell me it will be a honour 🩷🎀

°~`iamamickals.

[moonturtlephilosophy]

I replied to a post yesterday about 'radfems' talking about that radical isn't just for transphobic and or man hating women, because it's a very brought descriptor.

And my enteire coment chain was deleted/restricted even tho I didn't day anything wild? I just asked a question and then stated some facts? I am not entierly sure how this site works yet but I feel like someone shut my mouth against my will. I don't like it.

Hell, feminism as a whole is radical, for fucks sake.

---

radical

adjective

1.

(especially of change or action) relating to or affecting the fundamental nature of something; far-reaching or thorough.

"a radical overhaul of the existing regulatory framework"

2.

advocating or based on thorough or complete political or social change; representing or supporting an extreme or progressive section of a political party.

---

Wanting to change and or abolish the partiarchy is, most of the time, radical. These 'gender criticals' are the opposite of radical since they pick and chose outdated features of the patriarchy like bioessentialism, genderessentialism, the binary myth, stuff like that and enforce them, aka try to stifle actual progress. Progress always starts as a radical idea.

For feminism that probably started with the then radical idea that women are, in fact, people. And should be treated as such. As women got more legal protections and rights, queer women entered the official conversation with the then radical idea, that they too, are people. And deserve rights. And so on.

The main radical idea now is probably that men need to be included in the conversation/ true intersectional feminism. Be it men/mascs in general or the conversations around trans men/mascs. And thats were the zeitgeist is at. Thats why those who focus on feminism but are stuck in their mindset/unable to evolve, tend to be terfs and stuff.

Intersectional feminism is oposed to bigotry and small mindedness, not being radical.

Now, some people don't stop at 'let it stay like it is' and actually want to revert backwards/against the direction of progress and if they go far enough, they could be right wing radical (yk, like fashists). To be fair, thats a lot of terfs. But that still doesnt mean they 'own' the term radical.

Aside from feminism, radical ideas are the cornerstone of all progress. ALL. I know public schools avoid the topic or tell you about "bad radicals" at best to scare you off, but that capitalist propaganda is something you should decode for yourself.

Yk, messages like "radical means so out there it's absurd" like.. bruh

Also, extremism and being radical are also two different things that many actors in out current climate wanna see muddled together. Learn the difference.

Moral of the story: men are and always have been included in real feminist conversations and feminism is inherently radical. Otherwise, what are you fighting for? What do you acomplish by NOT changing anything??

[nananarc]

EXCUSE ME WHILE I RANT FOR A BIT

So anyway I finally started with the graduation project and, lemme tell ya, it was annoying. I mean I expected this, but it's still annoying.

The school and the mentor wants things to be of a certain aesthetic and standard so it can fit with the general public's taste and eventually it can be picked up by a publisher. it has to be commercial and easy to digest, for a lack of better words. Which is like, the opposite of essentially what i am as a person and as an artist.

So anyway I'll be doing Truyện Kiều again, illustrating the full book with better art this time. Here are some sketches I did:

Below is the mentor's very quick sketch for demo:

Which is. Ok cool, it's very traditional, Vietnamese fine art design and aesthetic. The thing that you see everywhere in books and media. The thing that is taught in fine art school. And it's also very HIM because he's a very prominent artist since a long time ago. I'm not talking about the difference in the era clothing tho because he demoed in Nguyễn dynasty while mine is of the Trần dynasty.

My style was criticized (politely) that the face doesn't look pretty, the nose is too prominent and big, the lineart is too scratchy and loose, and that I have to restrict the freedom in my lineart more.

Which is. Like. Pretty much all the things that i like about my art the most. I don't really like drawing "pretty" people, I wanna draw distinct and unique people. I like the fact that the nose is prominent because that's a very Vietnamese facial feature. Our nose is big, flat and flared. And I like it. AND I DIDNT EVEN DRAW IT THAT BIG. it's already stylized and stuff. The lineart is scratchy and spontaneous because that's how my ADHD brain works! And I like the freedom, the raw unfinished feel to it. And my way of scrawing is kinda similar to sculpting in a way that I like to put in a block of line or shape (yang) and then erase it and putting in more nothing space (yin). And I like Maximalism and Kitsch and Neo-traditionalism so I love to do things a bit crazy and new and filled with emotions.

My mentor comes from a very different generation, and a different field than me. He's very commercial, leaning more into minimalism, fine-art conservative and traditional aesthetic. WHICH IS THE OPPOSITE OF ME. Sadly we don't get to choose mentor cos there's only one lmao.

And also I don't understand why I have to aim for publishing in Vietnam too, because that's not where my target customer is. I'm a niche artist with limited customer base and they are international clients (who mostly pay better, treat you better, and appreciate your art more than the general public in VN do). Luckily I have a bachelor in business admin so I know how to do brand and marketing myself, othewise id just keep on trying to please everyone (flexing a little bit, but i was graduating with excellence and on the top 10 of my intake lmeo). Not to mention the fact that why do I even have to publish in the first place, because this is a school, it is a place to experiment, make mistakes, and learn. It's not a place to conform to the industry to make a living. If I wanna do that I would not be here and start working for a company already!

I understand it when they said that it would be a huge advantage if you can get published, but then again, that route is not for everyone, and it's not the only way to be an illustrator like they said. I have my own path to walk on, and I don't think they are aware that we even have those paths, because they are from a different generation. I mean, that's why I was struggling so much before to find a footing, because virtually no one here knows there are other paths! I had to dig things up myself through sweat, blood and tear.

Anyway I rant but i will keep trying to fight and do it on my own terms. They can't make me anyway. There's gonna be sticks and stones, but I mean, I can't physically make myself do something I do not wanna do. There's another option which is to drop it because I don't need the certificate anyway, but I wanna finish a big project of my own too.

[sanchoyo]

Hiiiiii, it is I again!! I just finished Cold Love and gosh!

The ending was just so nice, mostly when I thought SHIGGY WAS DYING FOR A MOMENT- 😭 Then they were just being super sweet at the beach and I ngl cried a little, they all deserved that happiness <3 I also still wanna cry (In a good way tho) BECAUSE I FINISHED THE WHOLE THING I wanna write a little note to myself, next to my bed, erase my memories about these 2 fics, then wake up next morning, read the note and reread the whole thing with as much joy as the first time! I'm gonna reread them FOR SURE, but not now as they're still fresh in my brain :3

And you know, Cold Love has opened my mind more than it already was I mean I already love heroes and villains, but you've put a lot more details that made me go: "Shit, I didn't think it was THAT much"

The way you wrote how the hero commission treats heroes made me think of what my parents always tell me about Actors and Models. "Their lives/bodies don't belong to them, it belongs to the company they work for" That sentence hit me even more when the chapters were Hawks centered. Poor guy, he was a literal lab rat. The worst is that he ISN'T THE ONLY ONE GOING THROUGH THAT

Villains, I already sympathized with a lot, in other medias and MHA too But your fic made me realize that, when they do those crimes, it's for them but mostly for OTHERS as well!! They're like heroes, in a way, because they want to make society BETTER. They do this because they know how it feels to be rejected, hated and they want to change it so NO ONE ELSE has to go through this. Also, we often see them not caring about dying if they do achieve their goal, because they know next gens will have better lives than they ever had. WHICH I THINK IS HELLA SAD BUT SO NICE OF THEM???

Though I DON'T agree with them taking lives of course, but I don't hate them anyways because, when they've been rejected by everyone and everything, how else are they supposed to get attention? Very unfortunately, crimes is often their answer…

I think, if I was in MHA, I'd also opt for the Vigilante route. Fuck the hero commission lmao

I won't tell why, but let's just say that I'm more compassionate about villains now <3

ON A MUCH LIGHTER NOTE!! Fanart for Warm Healer is on the way!! So keep an eye open? :3

Fun fact for Cold Love: When Bret asked why Dabi was in the closet, I blurted out: "BECAUSE HE'S GAY!!" Lmao

So yeah, just wanted to say your fics are great! They've inspired me into improving my own fics <3 I even started making my own Shiggy x Reader AND a Dabi x Reader too! Because most of them are smut centered and I don't want just NSFW ya kno?

Anyways, I'm done rambling lol Thanks for writing WH and CL, thanks for inspiring me, thanks for bringing me joy and sorry for rambling that much lmao

Hope you're doing well, lots of love, take care and keep being awesome!!

thank you so much for such a long, sweet message 💗💗💗

I really enjoy bnha fics where the writers closely examine the society and its problems because its SO interesting (and im kind of sad the way it went in canon, I wanted a lot more and found the school setting kind of restricting for it in general, but we'll always have fics haha) i'm glad you enjoyed me doing that just a little bit! (maybe it was kind of weird to include in a romance SI series, but also it would've felt like a huge disservice in my opinion because ALL of the villains stories are influenced by the society they live in and how heroes are treated...)

aaah again, don't feel obligated to do the fanart but if you do, definitely tag me/send it my way, I'd love to see!! 🥺 (also you're writing your own shigaraki/reader and dabi/reader!!! omg!! I hope you have fun making your own!!! they're so fun to write <3 I agree on the wanting more SFW SI fics, sometimes I just wanna go on silly adventures with my favs y'know? :"))

no need to apologize for rambling!! I'm so happy to hear you enjoyed it so much!!! your message made my day ^_^ I hope you have a good day too and your writing/art projects go well!!

[calsmakemesick]

hii! hope you're having a lovely day 💗

could you tell me what to do? I starve myself dialy, but not completely because I have to eat two meals; lunch and dinner (because of my mom ykyk). So I don't know what to do because I don't wanna eat but the "I'm not hungry" excuse isn't working anymore

(ofc you don't have to reply to this, it's just a question but if you're not comfortable it's totally okay, have a good day 🩷🩷)

hiii, my love 💗 I’m soo happy that ur reaching out to me for advice!! i have been in a similar situation so maybe I can help you out a little :’)

Have you tried saying something like

“I just ate, I’ll eat later..”

“I’m so full from *insert food that you didn’t actually eat*”

Also I’m not sure if you go to school but if you do (or if you work) you can easily fast and even take fake pictures of food so that way your parents don’t get too suspicious.

This is something I LOVE to do which tricks my parents into thinking I’m actually eating but I’m not. sometimes i purposefully make loud noises in the kitchen (ex; plastic crunching, turning on the microwave, etc.), leave crumbs, throw out food or dirty up the dishes so that my parents have physical proof i ate when they get suspicious. Trust me this works ALL THE TIME.

I know this contradicts what you’re telling me but eating in front of your parents will help you in the long run. If you’re planning on doing an OMAD make sure they see your meal or just in general. Once they see you eat “constantly” in front of them they will just end up not caring anymore and you can fast and restrict freely.

I hope this helps, stay skinny & be safe 💕

-xoxo, A

[getmylifetogetherwme]

What Are My Goals? (+ a little backstory)

Hi again!

I figured my next post should definitely center around introducing what goals I want to achieve.

Well, as I said in my last post (which you should read if you want a bit more background on me), I am in my senior year of undergrad, but that definitely doesn't mean I'm done with school. Nope. In fact, the goal is to go straight into a master's program. Then after that, even more academia (yay!), but that's getting too far ahead of ourselves. Let's stick with the near future for now.

I know to get into a good master's program, I have to keep my grades up. That's among my goals for this year: keep those grades UP.

This semester is quite the mess. Not only do I have ochem 2, a subject I am practically allergic to fully understanding, but I'm also taking another god forsaken subject: physics. If you are one of those gifted individuals who just "get it," know that I envy you tremendously. They are the bane of my undergraduate existence. The only thing standing between me and my degree, I fear.

My goal is to get all A's this semester. An ambitious goal (when I consider my history with these subjects, ochem 1 resulted in a B) but one I think I can seriously achieve if I dedicate myself the way I know I can. So there's one goal: Study, study, study. And when I think I'm through studying? More studying.

Another goal I have for myself is working out. I do workout, but I am insanely inconsistent as of late. I want to work out consistently. Not only is it good for me, but I also feel really good when I do it. It just feels good to feel strong, you know. I've been going for a few weeks, and I've seen some improvement already, but I've just been really inconsistent diet wise, so I'm not seeing many results. Let's segway into that: I want to eat better.

And when I say I want to "eat better," I don't mean I want to restrict myself or anything like that. I'm uninterested in becoming this ultra health person who can't live a little. The deal is: chemotherapy affects a lot of things. To be honest, I try not to think about it much, but I do have to wonder how much it'll affect my health later on in life. I know I did what I had to do, but I really wanna lessen the blow of it as much as I possibly can. I think I can do that through diet and exercise, even if it's a fairly small difference. When it comes to my diet, I want to prioritize fiber and lean protein. Protein, of course, because I really would like to gain muscle. So far, I'm very inconsistent with my protein intake. Not only that, but I spend way too much money on eating fast food. I don't want to be too strict with myself, so of course I can get some chicken nuggets every once in a while, but fast food is not as cheap as I think it is in those moments! I swear, every meal is literally like 10 dollars. Am I the only one who remembers when a meal was like 7?? It is genuinely a problem, especially since I should be saving for a car right now. Yikes. So those are some of my diet goals: more protein, more fiber; less eating out.

Another goal: save money. Well, folks, it's time. I absolutely have to save money. I've missed out on so many opportunities because of my lack of reliable transportation. It seriously holds me back from internships, shadowing, etc.. I have a license, but it's hard to always have to borrow my mom's car, especially considering my uni is quite a bit away. So one of my goals is to save up a good chunk of money to buy something used that'll get me from point A to point B. I'm not really the type of person who needs a "fancy" car. I just need something reliable. Something that'll go the distance. I've heard good things about Hondas and Toyotas, but even used, those are a bit expensive. The goal is something in that realm though, so saving money really has to be prioritized.

Finally, I just really want to take care of myself. I've been at odds with myself for a while, my entire adolescence basically. I've just now in recent years (the last two or so) become a bit more "at peace" with who I am + who I've become. Before, I kinda saw my body as this enemy, and now, I'm learning to love it - learning to love me. To do things for myself, because I want to - because I think I deserve to give those things to myself. I don't want to be too harsh on myself about anything, but I want to nudge myself towards the goals I so very badly want to achieve.

These are just a few of the things I am currently wanting to strive towards and accomplish.

My future posts will be about these topics and perhaps other goals. I plan on doing weekly goals, weekly recaps, updates about specific goals, what I'm doing to achieve those goals, etc. etc.. All in the name of accountability. For example, I think it would be really cool if I do posts about how my fitness journey is going, like what sort of progress I'm making PR wise (I'm lifting weights now!). Then, I'll do weekly uploads going through just about everything I studied, read, etc. etc..

If you're interested in reading about all of this sort of stuff, you should give my blog a follow! I'd also recommend you read my first post if you're a bit confused or curious about the purpose of this blog and or myself.

Thank you for reading,

-C