#i don't wanna blame any individuals

[emoclone]

i am having such a "i have to do everything my god damn self on this campus" moment rn

i have one person helping me and i appreciate them a lot, for real, but also we are only two people 😭

[politeparadox]

I for one am so over this whole trauma Olympics thing with the military. Shit's fucked everywhere, on different levels sure, but if it comes down to my partner and cats starving and your partner and cats starving, I'm sorry to say but you and your partner will be going hungry first. If I have the excess to share, I will, but I have to keep my life worth living before I can fix yours.

[farshootergotme]

Now that I have the confidence to send you asks, fully expect me to bug you periodically from here on out

Anyways- do you think Dick qualifies as a scapegoat? Cause I 100% think he's a scapegoat. People always try to shove the 'golden child' role onto Dick, and it always confused me cause like. He doesn't fit it at all if you actually look into what a golden child is.

Dick is definitely one of the scapegoats of the batfamily (Jason being the other) and it makes me sad that people always label him a golden child when he's the exact opposite. Seriously- he's hit, beaten, unfairly blamed, lashed out at, not told about important things (Jason or being replaced, Jason dying, Jason's funeral, probably other things, i wouldn't be surprised), etc. Definition of a scapegoat to me.

It's also why I hesitate to label him the 'favorite' even when the comics try to say otherwise. Mostly because... favorite children aren't really treated this way. Favorite weapon, maybe, as I've said in a post I've made before, but that's it. Bruce wouldn't kill for him or any of his kids. He's come close, yeah, but he's also come close to killing the Joker too after Jason's death and had to be threatened into not doing it. Every time, it's in a strong surge of emotion, and the second Bruce thinks rationally- well, he doesn't do it. Dick isn't at all unique, Bruce wouldn't kill for him either.

I think Bruce is the most proud of Dick, and has a unique relationship with him due to knowing him the longest and the parentification, but I don't think that makes him the favorite. Maybe to the other batkids, but probably not in reality.

I don't think Bruce really HAS a favorite- Dick is probably the closest to it, but still.

Though, if you wanna play around with angst and fanon ideas, maybe both Dick and Jason are the favorites and that's why Bruce treats them the worst? Dunno, it'd make a fun fic, even if it's not really grounded in canon (though I ignore RHATO and Comic UTRH).

Idk. Just,, gestures. Dick is a scapegoat to me.

Hope my 2 am rambling made sense lol

Okay, I see you, but I'll argue:

Dick Grayson is both the scapegoat and the golden child.

Now, you might not believe this since he doesn't tend to be both at the same time, and it isn't common for these roles to exist within the same individual. But Dick Grayson is praised and favored as much as he's blamed and pushed.

A golden child is the one who carries most of the expectations in the family. The parent expects them to be perfect, make no mistakes, take on roles they're pushed into with no issue (thus parentification can happen), and continue on and on to be good enough and meet the criteria so they don't make the parent disappointed.

The love is conditional hence they develop this unhealthy perfectionism and self-esteem and self-worth issues that will follow them till adulthood even when they're out of that environment and living their own lives.

The reason why a parent might choose a specific child (or children) to be the favored one is because they tend to see this child as an extension of themselves. And consequential to this, they will project their insecurities onto said child and force them to improve—be the best—where they fall short. All of their capabilities are overvalued, making the parent see them as special and much better than the rest, causing the unrealistic expectations a child must hold and fulfill so as not to “fail” their parent(s).

Although this child might seem like the favorite and who could do no wrong on the outside, the love they receive isn't something they can take for granted.

When a golden child underperforms or isn't as good as they're expected, the parent’s demeanor might change. They will feel the disappointment and fear this might cause the treatment they get to change. Sometimes the child might even fear abandonment or rejection from their parent as a result of their failures.

The mix of all this turns into a person who's over-competent, hard-working and someone that tends to take charge of things so they aren't at risk of failing, making them ‘natural’ leaders in any group they might be part of.

Sounding familiar yet?

Now, let's move on to the scapegoat:

A scapegoat child is the one that is blamed by all the things that go wrong in the family. They are constantly criticized and shamed by things they might've not even been part of, but somehow they're now involved and taking all the blame for the others so there are no consequences for anyone but them.

(All the blame also messes with their perception of certain events, making them prone to self-blame for the problems that occur in the family or their behaviors towards them.)

The scapegoating in the family may be due to subconscious projection from the parent when they're dealing with difficult emotions such as shame, guilt, rage, etc. They feel threatened by their own feelings and therefore they will try to escape from them by externalizing those feelings and making them their scapegoat’s problem.

Because of this treatment, the scapegoat might become an outsider in the family, feeling excluded and isolated from the rest. And for this, when push comes to shove and they're going through a rough patch, they will not have any reliable support they can go to inside the family as they'll be ignored or otherwise unfairly treated, having their feelings be invalidated.

Like the golden child, there's some aspects the scapegoat shares with the former:

Being treated differently by the parent/family.

Having unrealistic expectations placed upon them.

Being pushed into roles or responsibilities the child isn't meant to take.

Fear of expressing how they feel.

Self-worth issues and low self-esteem.

Although they're usually roles that are considered opposites, they aren't as incompatible as one might think. A child can alternate between being a scapegoat or the golden child, and this usually happens when the parent is very emotionally unstable, commonly due to a disorder such as narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) or borderline personality disorder (BPD).

(I have so many thoughts about the latter applying to Bruce, but I will refrain from elaborating to not make this longer than it needs to be)

Having all I've said until now in consideration, I'm sure you've noticed how Dick meets both criterias—dare I say the golden child more often than the scapegoat.

Bruce is always speaking about how Dick is “better than him” and “the thing he's ever done right”, but in both of these statements you can see he's taking who Dick is and making it as something that's part of him, comparing Dick's accomplishments to his and putting him in this pedestal, and because of this projection happens and Bruce starts seeing Dick as an extension of himself.

This is why, when he or Dick fail, Dick will suddenly become the scapegoat, contrasting with the former golden child position he was in.

Here you can see the high expectations, praise for his accomplishments, his siblings feeling like Dick is better than them (i.e. treated differently than the rest), and you can also see how when he doesn't meet the expectations, he's met with disappointment (see: Alfred disappointed he's not as bright as he usually is) or judgment (see: Bruce angry at him because he isn't committing to his cause as much as he expects him to).

And these are examples of Bruce being too harsh on Dick and expecting him to do better, blaming him for his brother's death, and in result Dick having a habit of blaming himself and accepting mistreatment, thinking it must be his fault.

More often than not, Dick is put on a pedestal by his family and even his friends sometimes. They praise and love him, but when there's occasions in which he's acting less than perfect, the treatment towards him can change.

Dick Grayson can be the golden child as much as he can be the scapegoat.

[sergle]

yall are about to piss me off by not having any PASSING basic knowledge of the way the u.s. military manipulates its recruits into joining by typing up one of your uninformed, unresearched, unempathetic, individualistic, unbelievably annoying posts about how 100% of the people in the military ended up there because they just Love America So Damn Much! they're extremely mature and informed at time of recruitment, they can totally leave anytime they want, they totally had tons of other avenues in life they could've taken, there was no rush at all to get income as fast as possible, and everyone in the military also totally is part of the combat divisions and personally enjoys being IN the military very much, big believers of violence. everyone in the military is shooting guns all day, that's how that works. they LOVE BLOODSHED. also I love the "amewicans haha" twang to this type of shit because you're actually TOTALLY stealing our Thing, which is turning systemic issues into Individual Issues. Instead of talking about the powers that be, it's so Personal Choice up in here. It's, "well you shouldn't have done it then. I totally wouldn't because I know better." you don't wanna talk about the military industrial complex as a whole, and you don't want to talk about recruiters, you just want to pin the blame on Specific Individual People one-by-one, as if they're responsible for the system that they're being ground up in. someone was in the military? bad person, no matter what. it's easier to believe that, I guess, than to acknowledge that Normal People (with high school educations) are manipulated and incentivized into joining a system that is Bad. at like age 18. but yeah no that 18 year old should have just been smarter lol haha anyway here are some screenshots for no particular reason

side note this reply of someone going "umm just get loans and go into a high paying field it's easy XD" as a direct response to someone trying to explain how most americans joining the military are being funneled in that direction out of a need for money.

and another person who Decided that americans join the military just CLENCHING their teeth thinking of other people, and not thinking completely selfishly about their own selves and their own income/housing/healthcare.

[double--blind]

(SPOILERS) Andrew and plausible deniability, OR: mfer doesn't wanna be held accountable for his actions

This has been churning in my head for a while (I am mentally ill 🥴), but a large part of the driving force behind Andy and his actions is his aversion to blame. He sorta shares this w/Ashley (she's got quite a few rants abt how things aren't her fault), but I believe Andrew takes it just a step further.

I've seen many say this before, but from the start of the game, you'll notice that even beyond normal moral quandaries, Andrew's first objection to any horrific action Ashley proposes is usually a variance of "what if we get caught?". He objects not bc her ideas are ethically repugnant, but bc they could be found out as having done them, and he knows rationally that others know they're bad. This goes as far back as childhood with the Nina incident. He fears punishment and the threat of prison more than he apparently worries about what his crimes might mean for him as a person or what they might mean for the people that might be affected by them (save him and Ashley). This doesn't mean he doesn't feel guilt or have nightmares abt them, but they're not his first priority. Trouble's a pain to deal with, and the dude's low-energy.

In fact, most of his guilt seems largely self-centered. Like, no exaggeration: if it isn't about either him or Ashley (which is, in a way, lowkey also about him), then he couldn't really care less. Do you recall him ever expressing worry or remorse on Nina's behalf? Mourning her? We think Ashley's the one w/empathy issues, but Andrew's in the same boat imo. Self-preservation and self-interest is all that's keeping him seemingly amiable enough for polite society, bc for the most part, he really couldn't be bothered.

In his dreams, the victims of their murders are just bodies: interchangeable, holding no more meaning beyond the fact that they're dead. Any corpse's limb will do to replace the one Ashley cooked—never mind that they may be from different people—bc they're all the same to him. Even Julia, sitting in her dorm room surrounded by evidence of Ashley's harassment, gets no sympathy from Andrew. For the most part, he elects to ignore it all, and regards Julia herself with a detached sorta nostalgia tinged in no small part with apathy.

img txt: You'll never see her again. And the fact that it doesn't really bother you, bothers you.

(The only things of notable worth from her were the colored pencils on her desk, which he promptly takes from her to give to Leyley instead, and isn't that just some crazy symbolism right there?)

His fear of punishment goes hand-in-hand with his desperate pursuit of plausible deniability. Everything he does, he does under certain self-imposed conditions. If it's Ashley's idea and he argues back, it doesn't matter in the end if he goes along with it, bc it was Ashley's idea in the first place. He's just there to make sure she doesn't get them in trouble, bc she needs him, bc he's gotta take care of her. Even if it's not her idea at all (e.g., killing the closet warden, killing the lady in room 302), it's still her fault, bc he did it for her, bc everything he does, he does for her.

Ashley's a manipulative, evil lil possessive gremlin w/a soul as black as tar, and Andy's a doormat, but don't think for a second that part of him doesn't use that dynamic a little to keep from reflecting on what he is. He suffocates under it, but he also relies on it. If there's any sort of plausible deniability available, he'll take it and run with it.

The truth of the matter is that they're both deeply toxic, warped individuals. The difference is that Ashley's owned up to it and quite frankly doesn't care. Andrew hasn't. He's the "normal" one.

Now, for the funky incest part (what we're all here for babyyyyy)—

We've all seen the flavor text abt the bed-sharing by now, right?

img txt: Oh yeah, you tooootally have nightmares as often as you claim.

We know for a fact that aside from some light teasing, maybe, Ashley would have no problem whatsoever with sharing a bed w/Andrew. Heck, she'll coax him into bed (demo) or climb onto the couch with him (ep 2) w/o any prompting from him whatsoever, just bc she feels like it. Andrew, apparently, can't do the same. He doesn't allow himself this intimacy of his own choosing, so he has to lie and pretend to get it if he wants it. He's greedy for her, too, but he can't let himself show it.

If something is sufficiently too intimate in his eyes, beyond anything he can excuse away for some reason or another, then he'll stop himself from doing it. Just like how he wouldn't let himself succumb to the urge of pulling Ashley into his arms to make her smile, but is willing to give her a hug when she asks for it in front of their parents.

He insists on the extra expense of two beds, and then cites his nightmares and panic attacks as the driving force behind crawling into bed w/her, bc then it isn't really his fault now, is it? He tried to stay away, after all. He did! He just didn't have a choice!

Lol

Andrew can't admit to wanting this—buries those feelings and thoughts as deep as he can so they fester and bleed, the repressed idiot—so he gives Ashley all the power to decide how close they get. It's in Ashley's hands. He's free of that hassle.

Which is why the post-sex vision, and Ashley's reaction to it, is so dangerous. @csg-iii made a good point about it in my last post:

img txt: I think the biggest point about "11" is that Andrew asks/begs Ashley for reassurance that it will never happen ("never say never"). It's a subtle admission that if she really wants it to happen, he knows he won't be able to resist his own urges. His only ""hope"" of avoiding going there is if Ashley doesn't want it.

Andrew, in absolving himself of this choice and putting it in Ashley's hands, shoots himself in the foot, bc what if Ashley goes the whole mile? Then the only real thing keeping his desires unrealized was the fact that they had never been voiced as an option before.

He doesn't want to think of himself as someone who'd bone his own sister. Forget being a cannibal, demon summoner, or a murderer; those titles were foisted upon him. This is too close to something real that he carries inside him; this isn't anything Ashley's buried in him, but rather something of his own invention. Something he'll definitely have to take responsibility for.

[the-moon-files]

YESSSSS I BEG GET INTO THE CULTURAL DIDFERENCES BETWEEN HYLIANS AND HUMANS 🙏🙏

...now ur just sweet talking me 🥰 /lh

Not years, well maybe 1 year-

but i have wanted to ramble desperately to smone, even the tumblr void if i had to, abt humans vs. hylians so much, esp with a guide reader or male reader bc whatdya know im into niche stuff that only u and like 2 other ppl like lmao ¯\(ツ)/¯

Anyway im so shocked, since ur like the third person to be interested in this and wanna hear abt it 🥺 🤲💌 here u go!! Hope u like it <333 👉👈

Sun: Masc!Reader (he/him)

Orbit: Humans are Not Hylians/Humans are Space Orcs AU, Headcanons-ish, long overall but each section is kinda short

Stars: Mostly worldbuilding! you've been warned, don't get mad me for not talking abt the boys too much✌️

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: mild cursing, mentions of private area/joke in the clothing headcanons, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

☆

just some quick headcanons bc tbh i haven't given it too much thought, and i feel like I've been able to somewhat get into it in other posts? or maybe im thinking of stuff i have in my drafts idk-

Imma make another list, so buckle up for the short ride lol

Courting periods/dating/marriage

individual/small groups society-based hylians v. large personal groups/large community society-based humans

simpler foods hylians v. complex food humans

clothing modesty/style/relationships with fashion

fighting styles/strategies

entertainment complexity/differences

and language

☆

1st one, not much yet, im also making a separate post bc someone else asked me to talk abt that more 🥺

(tysm for all the enthusiastic asks guys <33)

anyway, basically hylian courting is a lot shorter, think “lesbians with the uhaul” type of energy, like sort of the classical medieval “does thee wish to pursue marriage with this one?” ← how hylians ask u out for the first time lmao

if it helps, they do tend to get to know one another well, talking about morals/kids/life goals/preferred lifestyle/house/etc. pretty clearly and quickly, then using the in between time to sort of stew on that information

id say the total time is sort of something like 6 months? maybe 3/4 if they're really compatible

(so bc i love interpreting video game logic for real world building, I actually blame this on how fast Zelda/link get together in games despite having sometimes never met before that moment lol)

like i said, ill be posting about this later

2nd one!!

pretty basic, just saying we don't really see hylians in big groups, despite the organizations they form, like kingdoms/knights or on a more personal level, towns/families/etc.

(once again, in-game appearances/video game logic translated to real life to draw these conclusions)

like not only are family units pretty small, like nuclear family setup, with like 2 parents and 2 kids, or single parent 1 kid type of situation, but the towns or collections of these families arent very big either

hylians kind of use their government the way it was intended lmao?

like the villages and towns matter more for everyday decisions than the kingdom/royalty, like Zelda would esstientally just be the mayor of Castle Town for those constant decisions,

while occasionally is called on to make decisions like for several towns or like is a natural disaster happens

meanwhile humans are, in comparison, in Way Bigger groups, both on an organization scale, and a personal scale

like u have all these specific branches of government, whereas im sure the population difference doesn't help,

and on a personal level, humans can easily have like multiple parents, lots of siblings, and once u combine that with each parent having family too, and those families like to meet up? All together??

yeah, itd look insane to any hylians (who’s smaller extended family may just make up their own village and that's it)

3. I've touched on this

like the use of spices, syrups, seasonings, etc

but also the complexity of dishes too, like chilling cream and mixing it for awhile to make ice cream, or even just getting ordering a pizza,

that's a lot of processing, like making the dough from flour and other ingredients, to letting it rise, to making the tomato paste, making cheese, then combining those things with any other toppings, all into one dish??

i like to think that hylians have only just started to touch on actual complicated cooking processes (as in BOTW, where they sell flour and salt, so people besides Link/Wild must know what to do with it)

this has the advantage of impressing any hylian with what a “creative genius” you are lol

4. look im just a fan of medieval time periods Links

so i think its funny if the hylians are used to like 4/3 layers and ur over here like, “wym, if i take off my shirt there's nothing underneath?”

one of them gets bold enough to ask, “d-do you not. do you not have undergarments??”

you “just my boxers? like just to cover my di-”

also this makes its easy to seduce people here? LMAO

clothes are def higher quality, after all there's not as many artificial processes or materials interfering,

plus u usually get some sick embroidery on it too!!

5. so like i get it, Link is the main fighter in games

but like, the few times there is a war/army in loz games, there's rlly not a lot of strategy, beyond just finding the enemy and fighting

tho im partial to that hylians/most inhabitants of Hyrule abide by the “lets meet up either literally by inviting each other or just between our territories to fight”

with occasional guerilla warfare (by any means necessary/stealth/ambush attacks/strategy) that's only rlly used either by Demise/Ganon, or by the wilder individuals/races in games

or maybe even the more civilized fighters in an emergency

and so that means by this logic that all of the Chain use kind of wild techniques compared to their race/kingdom lmao

id imagine its not too surprising to also see “every fight is a bar fight if its for my life” from individual travelers, so im sure they're not viewed too crazy (esp when ppl know their the hero that constantly has to deal with guerilla warfare from Ganon)

but its be hilarious to watch the reactions of both the Links realizing they’re in a bigger group that should be using “proper” fighting strategies and seeing the general publics reaction to this absolutely feral, armed to the teeth, trained hylians with their equally wild human lol

LMAO everyone thinks ur the reason they started using the more brutal fighting methods bc ur human, ur a bad influence lol

(humans would use it primarily, esp after we converted to use that method in warfare a couple hundred years ago i think?)

changing course a bit, hylians tend to use weapons (to compensate for difference in strength compared to humans, and since they don't experience/get a lesser version of adrenaline)

while humans tend to equally rely on weapons and our body as a weapon (marital arts/basic self-defense)

6. this is mostly bc the hylians only rlly seem to have the basics of music, books/stories, theater, and art

i have, surprise surprise, another post abt how i think this came to be,

mostly based on how human curiosity is indomitable and insatiable and the endless force that has not yet met its immovable object.

or at least an immovable object they haven't at least poked a little, out of curiosity lol

like we went to space for that reason, we reach the most dangerous corners of our planet (deep underwater/volcanoes) out of sheer curiousity/for the sake of simple knowledge of the thing

so needless to say, curiosity can absolutely drive any field to its limits, including the arts, which is why we can have stained glass, or movies/tv shows, hell, the marvel that is Hatsune Miku lmao

(fully for entertainment, a projection of light and sound, what is essentially magical illusions but u did it hte hard way, to the hylians)

on a different entertainment related note, i don't know if the hylians would be super into sports, or not really at all? mostly bc they have to use their fighting/training against real threats, not the sort of “fake” threats that sports are

but on the other hand i could see people like knights wanting to use their abilities for something other than violence and fighting bc their life or their villages lives depended on it

bet the Links would enjoy it for those reasons especially, what with at least sumo wrestling being a sport or activity for them at some point in history, and practically beg u for any new games to play, or to ref their games, bc whewwww

im sure they could get pretty competitive lol

7. obviously, their mostly influenced by the Japanese language

id almost like to imagine a sort of, if not outright Japanese (like with earlier heroes like Sky) then a sort of English-Japanese hybrid further along the line

sort of like how English has German/Greek/Latin roots and therefore u can see what words or structure comes from where, or even how u can understand a fair amount of basic words when other languages share the same roots (english, pants = spanish, pantalones)

would make for some funny miscommunications

or even better, most hylians liking ur unique accent or the Links love to hear u talk bc of it lol

☆

well the fever has broken, i am now free of the sickness that made me hack this up geez

i hope u got some enjoyment out of these my beloved anon!! esp since u were so nice as to ask abt it <33

hope u guys have a great weekend, look out for some more posts, bc its been great to get some more asks in lately and very motivating,

not to mention i actually have time to write now that my siblings graduated/we’ve moved several states over 💀

so i have reliable internet now too! sheesh :’)

Peace out,

🌙

[vivisviolets]

The intentions of this person💗✨🌚🌝 Positive v. Negative energy (ANY PERSON/SITUATION)

↳1, 2, 3, ↳4, 5, 6

♡★helloo, guess whattt- this was supposed to be 9 ponies but i chickened out 🐓, bc its better to let the egg crack then to just sit on it forever (explanation: its better to post instead of trying to be perfect✨💖)- also this was released early on my Patreon for a whole week! so if you wanna get messages like these sooner then come join all my other little peppermint-patty-patreon members<3 kk enjoy~*

♡ - Pile 1

♡ - Cards: Ace of Swords, The Devil (reversed), The Hanged Man

♡ - Oooh ok, Hi Pile 1s! Energy check first- this person is very sweet, or appears that way outwardly- I'm getting this taste of some sweet hard candy flavor (grape/fruit punch), honestly I think this person's sweetness or how they appear in your own energy is hitting some "hard" spot in you, I'm hearing "hard shell", but this could also be this person, as I'm picking up that while they are just as sweet if not sweeter on the inside as they are on the outside (I'm hearing ooey gooey nooo why is it always that phrase 😭), there is some possible facade that they have, that I think you are suspish of- but I feel that this type of facade they have is similar to that of a nurse/care-worker…? In fact they be in one of those roles, maybe even customer service? Either way, this goes back to that "hard spot" that was being hit/triggered, possibly in you. Hm…

Their intention: Positive ♡ - This person's energy can be a little saccharine- in terms of their sweetness, and while I think that is triggering something personal that is within you- you aren't wrong. I get the sense that this person relies too heavily on their femininity- and I say "relies" because this isn't really a healthy connection to femininity, they use the energy they can gain so as to put up a sweet/peppy front. But it's not a false front, nor is it a bad thing- it's more so they need some more grounding within themselves so they can return being more authentically them. And I definitely think if you two become closer, you could help them feel comfortable enough to do that! And they could be very beneficial to you too, so good luck pile 1! I see this as being a blossoming friendship.

-

⚡️ - Pile 2

⚡️ - Cards: Page of Pentacles (reversed), The Sun (reversed), The World

⚡️ - Ok this is interesting- Hello Pile 2 nearly said pile 3 so that might be for you as well! This is a masculine energy, and I was expecting to get a knight when drawing cards, this person is so masculine I'm tempted to use he/him- but of course this is gender neutral, only energetically this person is masculine,- I'm getting that someone here might even have a son… This person is also quite impulsive, and their ego has a strong outward presence, they may be a Leo or have a lot of 5th house placements. It's giving "fast", they may be the type to rush through life, maybe out of an avoidant attachment,-they could be more anxious-avoidant when vulnerable/more emotional. They have a very cool style though I'm not gonna lieee (even if they dress basic, they carry themselves like a model and everyone has a camera-😳😭 bruh)- if this is romantic/sexual I don't blame you for being attracted to them because they know how to make themselves the center of the room, center of the stage if you will.

Their intention: Negative ⚡️ - Deep in a- deep in a- deep in a dark club🎶- I don't know WHY that was the song that bass-boosted into my head- but yea, while my energy reading of them was neutral, their intention towards you (and everything else in their life) is not, it's not ok- it's kinda shady ngl- it's giving f-boy I'm afraid to say. Because I'm picking for the collective you guys are very sweet, soft people- IM HEARING THEY SEE YOU AS COTTON CANDY AND THEY WANNA MUNCH- AND "RUIN" YOU😭😱⁉️ oh no-no-no-nooo get out… Um- get out. Sorry anyways- for real tho, the energy you have is pure. And Jesus Christ- next to this individual, their energy level is bottom of the well- not even bottom of the barrel- it's slimy. Even though they make themselves out to be so bright and eye catching, it's all fake- it's like they're a fluorescent light, while you are sunlight… Yea just don't, ok? Literally best remedy is to ignore them, it may feel like they're taking away your spotlight, but it's actually the other way around. Out of sight out of mind. Something better is coming. Fucking trust me

- 🐌 - Pile 3

🐌 - Cards: Queen of Cups, 10 of Pentacles, 10 of Cups (Reversed)

🐌 - Awe ok they're cute, Hi Pile 3~ welcome-welcome, it's giving demure, it's giving mindful- it's giving shy- awww, this person is quiet. They are tapped into their emotions- and everything makes them anxious BHAHA that is what I am picking up, for some of you this is a new person on your radar- that came in after you let go of someone, good for you! Because this situation is actually going to offer a bit of healing, I'm seeing butterflies- very soft, simple, distracting- but good distracting! Honestly I keep hearing "delicate", even if this person is perceived as masc, they have a sensitivity to them- but what's unique about them is that sensitivity extends outward, outside of themselves. They may work with animals, pet shop, pet care- and they may have more (perceived as) "delicate" hobbies- I'm hearing book reading/bookworm, crochet, journaling, and being in nature! Their intention: Positive 🐌 - While I write positive- for most of you here I don't see this working out -working out as in long term, I mean. (This could even represent a job position- and it'll be a temporary one)-- because the point of gaining this connection was to offer you a breath of fresh air as you stepped into this new phase in your life. If this is a relationship/friendship, they were there to show you- you have options, that you have good options- if this is only a crush or admirer, it's to show you that you are attractive, and to give you a healthy ego boost. And finally if this is a job position, it's to teach you positive lessons and for you to gain information- before you are sent off to somewhere better- or someone, who's a better match (even if that's just yourself 💗). - 🦅 - Pile 4

🦅 - Cards: 8 of Pentacles, Page of Pentacles (reversed), Ace of Swords 🦅 - Sup' Pile 4! Welcome-welcome, I sense this maybe a shorter pile as most of you here are asking about a recent acquaintance- and or your energy is just that peaceful currently- idk. The person on your mind you may have met online or in a group setting of some kind, and even though you have not interacted much, this person is quite cheerful when they talk to you, maybe you have talked enough within the group that they have sought you out one-on-one (if that has not happened it will, they are eager to speak to you further)- and you guys have either connected with each other based on art/creative projects, or a shared tv series/fandom!

Their intention: Positive 🦅 - I see this being a very light hearted connection, the kind where you know of each other and are able to-- finish a potato sack race together, you know? Your personalities go together well like pb&j,- it's just not a relationship that can get much deeper then that, just FYI and there is nothing wrong with that! You two share some cute inside jokes and may remember certain details about each other and that's enough!- and a reminder to always share kindness, but especially to focus on giving your energy to those closest to you~! - ⚝ - Pile 5

⚝ - Cards: 2 of cups, nine of Pentacles, Queen of cups, 3 of Pentacles (bonus) ⚝ - Someone here is very nurturing- maybe it's them, or you could be reading through this reading because you are nurturing- but maybe it's both of you! Maybe it's this relationship, the pair of you together that creates nurturance💛. How lovely- you may have just found your match! You might not realize it at first, sometimes we get so used to searching that we don't realized we already got what we've been looking for just under our nose~ awe pile 5, this is truly so wonderful… But this is the energy check in so let me continue picking up this person's aura/energy- honestly this could even be a mother figure in your life, and them and your inner child are healing together💛🌟- but this also could be someone you have met and have become friends with!- however they identify, they have a very divine feminine/divine mother energy to them, and honestly this may show up in their appearance (I'm seeing a heavier/plumper body type, rounded hips, round face, round lips, rounded/soft/fluffy hair- again regardless of gender!!), they may have prominent/strong cancer placements (maybe Leo as well), they're the type that artists would have used back then to model for paintings/sculptures, they're majestic even if they dress/appear super ordinary, and you may have met them via work as there's something about this connection that still feels a little reserved. They know how to get along well with people, as they appear very kind and non-threatening!

Their intention: Positive ⚝ - Please get to know them more!!! This is your sign that they are safe to get to know/get closer to. Just be gentle and don't be nervous, this is a connection to enjoy, remember that peacefulness kindness is something that relationships should have, even if that feels unfimilar to you❤️❤️. They can give to you like how you give to others, balance is key and they are more then capable of being a part of said balance!! Now go out to brunch with them goddamn it!!!! - Pile 6

★ - Cards: The Star (reversed), Justice (reversed), Two of Pentacles ★ - Okkk, cards I pulled were interesting- chille- Hi Pile 6. some of yall are thinking about multiple people (a friend group?), and some are thinking of just one person. They have some sense of style that caught your eye, this could be their aesthetic, appearance, behavior, charisma, etc. They may be someone who stands out in a group, and they may have “player” energy but it’s turned attractive by their personality. I’m seeing a lot of smiling and laughing, their jokes can make people feel cared for, they may have an accent, or they may be loud- their voice is recognizable in some way. I’m hearing “they know how to be funny, and then walk out the door 🚪), oh nooo- for some of you this person may come across passive aggressive at very random times, and for other’s this person tends to randomly ”shut down”/disengage, they always have something to say, until they don’t, and they’re always “locked in” until they’re not. They’re touch and go, willing to put in the effort to have a good time. I’m seeing this is something they learned to do out of a place of insecurity, and they tend to see people for what they can do for them, and if the person is not doing that, then they refocus on something else/another person.

Their intention: Negative ★ - I don’t know if this person’s energy is positive, or negative to be honest,- because I’m seeing they have desires for you, just like how you have desires for them and there’s chemistry. I think the only thing that made me define it as negative is that this person is aiming for a “friends w/ benefits” situation, and I don’t believe you truly want that pile 6. because I’m seeing that this person won’t even be a “friend” to you, very hot and cold, talkative and complimentary one moment then fully apathtic the next- because they do not like you- so much as they enjoy the chemistry when it’s good. I’m seeing moments where you are trying to talk about your day, and they remain on their phone, and you almost feel like you’re annoying them, even tho they were fine with talking 3 minutes ago and laughing. spirit’s harsh advice is that this is a waste of your energy and the benefits aren’t worth it/aren’t for you, and even though you act chill/fine with it, you know you want something more and you’re deserving of having that, and to not take it safe anymore with these nowhere relationships.. but to be fair to you, if you want those types of casual relationships with only “fun” then go off then- but still, weed out the ones who are less worth your time, because you have several. and this won’t be an energy you can stay in forever.

. . . why do i feel like playing roblox i don't even have roblox

love, vi~♡

[rayroseu]

"you are just as guilty" ⚔️🥀

last cough of art before the update ahkdhkshsksh AAAAAAAAAAA i dont wanna leave Briar Valley yet 😩😩😩😩 Lilia don't gatekeep all the lore,,, dang it,,,💔💔💔💔

sometimes i really do wonder what Meleanor or Dawn's last thoughts before dying..... ESPECIALLY Dawn... Bro rarely has the chances to express his individuality, he's so tragic to be with the Silver Owls sm.. 😭who suppresses all opinions as seen with their soldier garments (all of them basically have the same motifs and design) in contrast,.. Meleanor's army has differently designed mask to highlight the unique faes they are--

I have this thought that like Silver, he cries about the sins of his nation as well... 😭I think he has regrets that he made Meleanor overblot and blames himself for it 😭 (Like how Silver was the last straw to make Malleus overblot-)

I think its a common interpretation that Dawn is heroic, but I don't think of him that way KSJSKS, not because he's not a hero, but because he's a failed one. In the story, it felt like he was "just a person". He's not perfect, he's flawed.

And, I think the existence of "failed heroes" like Dawn is really intriguing in TWST,,,, because the heroic characters here are depicted as "never failing at anything". Like how RSA characters are. They never lose at anything, but ironically the character most inspired by this school (RSA) failed at "being a good hero."

I'm interpreting he failed because he couldn't make his mission come true; peace between fae and humans, in fact he might have worsened it with the passing of Meleanor 😭😭💔💔

The most tragic thing of all his life, was probably the part where he died, not because of the faes, but of his own fellow countrymen... I imagine in this image, what did he even kill Meleanor for? He couldn't make any peace between faes and humans, he couldn't save his country, we're not even sure if he did use Meleanor's magical stone to save the Human King and if he was successful with it, so if he has failed at everything he aspired to achieve, then what else is the point to all the bloodshed he has faced and committed?

In a way, his "punishment" is similar to Rollo's, celebrated by the achievement he didn't want to commit (except its the good guy this time adskjs)

(Thats why I'm sold at the idea of Dawn just giving up fighting at his death bcs theres no way if he did actually had the motivation to fight, he'd lose against fellow humans when he fought Meleanor on solo akhdkhs... unless they reveal how he died as well next update---🙏🏻✨😳/copium)

In a way, its similar to Silver's disappointment too, that he worked all his life to make Lilia proud, to make sure that faes like his Father can be understood better, only for Lilia to leave him all alone yk... 🥹

But on the other side, I don't think he failed too much... because of his losses, Silver was brought to Lilia 🥹🥹

I feel like Lilia will relate to Dawn as well,,, He said in the story that he sympathized with Dawn because he spared tamago Malleus, but I beg to differ.

I think its actually because like Dawn, Lilia is also a knight who failed at everything he aspired to commit to (he took so long to hatch the egg and he failed to protect Meleanor and keep his promise with Levan that he'll take care of his wife and son-) so at that realization, Lilia probably sees that there's no reason to hate him, they had the same fate, so why would he hate his child as well?

He's not living anymore but I think Lilia could see that Dawn probably awaited for centuries to wake his son up from sleep,,, like how Lilia desperately waited and wished that something would hatch Malleus already 😭😭💔💔

JUST... KNIGHT OF DAWN I'LL REMEMBER YOU FOREVER SKDJSK 😭😭😭😭🫂🫂🫂

[infiniteglitterfall]

Please note, for the purposes of this poll:

Don't post judgments in the notes. (Of people who vote a particular way, of autistics, of whomstever.)

Allistic means non-autistic.

If you're not sure which you are (e.g. you're sure you're allistic, but autistic people keep insisting you're not): I personally think watching this video and seeing whether you tend to be guided by your beliefs, or by new information, is a good quick test.

Nobody can see how you responded. Even I can't see individual responses.

(Unless you say something in a reply/reblog. Everyone can see replies/reblogs, just like on any other post.)

No blame attaches, as my friend @siriosa always says. Your response does not indicate any other opinions about anything. This is not a test. Nor is it secretly a larger question.

It is ESPECIALLY not a test to see which group is more moral, ethical, or politically aware.

I'm just curious about how the information we have access to, and the community discourse around it, plays out if you separate autistic and allistic people. Probably it doesn't, and this is not a scientific study, but I wanna ask.

[purpleguysimp]

UNIFORM HEADCANONS‼️‼️‼️

General stuff is that hair should be kept out the way and in neutral colors (best is not dyed at all but if you do want to dye it then neutral colors), uniform should be kept to the cleanest you can, hygiene must be kept up and no beards are allowed. Oh and also, wear your goggles at all times of course!

But there are two different uniforms, one for general work and the caretakers.

Under the cut are both uniforms individually!

General Work

Mostly everyone have these uniforms, the black is stuff that isn't physically in the pic.

But I got EVEN MORE THOUGHTS !!!!!!

The nametag is embroidered on and only shows the first name, and last names are not necessary unless someone has the same name as you. If you need someone's last name just ask and they'll probably be fine with giving it over!

Long nails aren't explicitly said to be bad but you cant wear your gloves with long nails. Though, short painted nails are okay for both genders!

Face piercings should be kept to a minimum and SMALL. You don't want any patients to get handsy and try to grab your septum piercing and rip your nose off.

Pants must MUST be tucked into your boots at all times, this is to prevent from any chemicals or bodily fluids getting on you and your socks (you do NOT wanna walk in socks that are soaked in blood and piss and shit for a 17 hour shift.)

All the clothes are lined with comfy fabric that soaks up sweat like a sponge, with the outer being a fabric that is durable and doesn't stain easily.

The caretakers

The caretakers have a completely different style, copying more of Lankmann's sense of style. I didn't color code the notes this time but its a lot of text and i was hiding at school in the restrooms while bleeding out my privates do you really blame me

On the tie there is a mentioned tag-ID, and this isn't just any nametag! This has your full legal name, your DOB, your AGAB, and a picture of you! These are used so that if you are injured or killed during Veldigun capture or care then your family can be properly compensated for your efforts and loss.

They are hidden but on these uniform there EVEN MORE POCKET SPACE!!! All in the coat are just pockets and pockets and pockets and even a gun holster!

Under the coat is a relatively breathable button up and vest with suit pants, all black.

Women are advised to wear sports bras and not anything with a wire, the best you can do is bras you'd wear while practicing hand to hand combat.

[not-goldy]

Notice how JJK aren't worried at all about Tae and TK. Notice how they aren't scared running around saying Tae is trying to turn JK gay, even with how much Tae won't stop talking about Jk and feeding tkk crumbs to divert his relationship with Jennie. They are completely unphased. All of Karmy are. They don't bat an eyelash to Tk. And Tkk wanna act like koreans know about TK. LMAO Honey don't kid yourselves, these homophobic karmy are out here listening and watching JIKOOK and losing their damn minds cause they understand what is happening, cause Jikook have a lack of filter when it comes to language used between couples, lack of honorifics and tone. Karmy know Tae and Jennie are together. They been known. They know TK are not together. They are not threatened by TK in the slightest. They are shitting in their homophobic pants over Jikook, because their worst nightmare is looking more and more like a reality everyday. That Jk is gay and in love with Jimin. They wanna blame Jimin for "being too girly and too gay, shaking his forbidden apples in front of Jk and daring him to take a bite" and destroying their dreams, that they will marry JK. They would rather Jimin be jailed then to have to deal with Jk being gay. PJM's would most likely support Jimin coming out. JK's fanbase however, will turn on him like rabid dogs and they are proving it right now. Jk deserves better fans. He needs to be freed from Taekookers and JK solos, cause neither respect him or his decisions. They think he's a braindead moron who is slow and not right in the head. An infant or child being manipulated by Jimin and can't think or do for himself, instead of realizing he's 26. Straight up insulting this man's intelligence in broad daylight.

Finally, I feel seen 🥺

No two relationships are the same. Ain't no way. And that should be the most basic minimum common sense any rational human must have. So its really baffling when I hear- dumb low mileage brain individuals packaging buffoonery as think pieces- talking bout look TKK and JKK are the same cos they do the same- like no bitch shut up. Stop talking. I so wanna pull their tongue out and strangle them with it

And the opposition Jikook faces out here is damn right telling. Homophobia isn't something you fake experience. Jikook would have to be true crime true pain lovers to put themselves in that cross fire.

[spitblaze]

Hello, Mr. Lev, sir! They added Octopath Traveler to GamePass, and I've been itching to play it after seeing how much it has enraptured you. Any advice or anything I should know going in?

Oh absolutely, lemme lay out some stuff:

Gameplay-wise, this game is very strategy-based and often grind-heavy. If you wanna slap some mods onto it to make the gameplay less tedious in terms of exp/jp gain, I would not blame you At All. If you're into that kinda stuff (like me) it's a LOT of fun utilizing strategy to take down beasts, but if you're not, I say there's no shame in watching a playthrough instead.

You will see people talking a lot of shit on this game. These are typically people who got their opinions from people who already do not like RPGs and went into a game mis-marketed by Square Enix, who is already well known for botching the marketing on everything they produce except Final Fantasy and Dragon Quest. The game is a pretty consistent 7-8 out of 10, it's not the best thing they've ever made but it is not even CLOSE to the worst thing theyve put out and people get wayyy too mad about it for some reason.

Don't, like...go in expecting super deep inter-party interactions. You get plenty of them, like 3-4 per chapter after everyone's chapter 1 (in order to get them you need to have the specific character they wanna talk to in your party. After a major plot beat the move is usually to go to the tavern and swap people out until you see the party banter icon in the corner, but if you don't wanna do that they're all available on the octopath wiki). It's annoying that there's not more of them but for me what really makes my brain like to gnaw on it is that the characters are all strongly written but there's a *lot* of space left in the air to be filled in, and if you mesh with the characters and the storytelling you'll find that it's so easy to fill in the blanks yourself.

If you don't vibe with one, that's fine. Two is generally considered the better of the two for the technical improvements and more inter-party interaction, but there's no right answer in terms of which one is narratively better. It's alllllll subjective

btw invest in Therion early. hes good as a dodge tank and a magic user but the OT1 Thief movelist is actually kinda nuts. He doesn't have to be the one you start with but if you do I apologize in advance for the funny purple thief brainrot

Same with Tressa, parts of the Merchant movelist may seem underwhelming at first but once you get to the point where money is easy to come by and you have A Certain Secret Job, it's VERY hard to justify leaving her at home for tough fights.

also you should play Live A Live. its not quite right to call it OT a spiritual successor but it takes some strong cues from it. also the remake on switch is really good

That's all I can think of in this moment. I'm sure other people have their own stuff to add, and I don't think I can add anything else myself without getting overly biased so. ye, don't be discouraged by individuals saying it sucks, play octopath, if you like strategy-oriented turn-based games then there is a good chance you will like it i think!

[eulchu]

ok guys. let's have a real talk. let's ALL have a real talk and i don't mean just me and my anons . i hope this reaches all of our community even if you think i fucking suck.

fucking october didn't ruin us but i am so worried that this dumb tension just might. this is getting so ridiculous and out of hand -i barely understand what's going on myself. so im gonna need everyone to work together and do a collective reflection exercise.

i am gonna write out a series of points that i need u guys to think about before proceeding in this community:

- active blogs. you're burnt out. you're burnt out and you're so tired of trying to keep this community running that you're denying yourself a moment to feel your own frustrations as your own individual person. i get that . i get being under so much pressure that you can't catch yourself some slack, least you spiral out of control <- this is, however, really damn unhealthy 😭 it's ok to let yourself feel some disappointment!! some anger!! that's fine. it's up to you, however, what you do with it. this brings us to our next point.

- we NEED to acknowledge this if we wanna get better. ifl it's taboo and we're pushing the narrative so hard we're not giving ourselves enough space to breathe. it. is. okay. to. feel. disappointed. over. the. lack. of. dteam. content. i am the first person to shut down any self entilted prick who thinks they can expect something out of them. because they DON'T owe us anything. but truth is we are humans and, accordingly so, feel in consequence of our own expectations. i wanna break this part down in a few points:

it is OKAY to acknowledge that we are disappointed. denying one self's feelings never ended up ok for anyone. it is okay to acknowledge that we are not getting the content we were hoping for.

it is NOT okay to blame the dteam for it. this is where it gets tricky. the dteam are in charge of what type of content they put out. it will never be in our hands. at that point, if you don't like what they're doing. leave. i'm sorry. it's harsh. i'm not trying to be mean about it. i'd understand if you left! it's ok!

- before you leave, though, i want to ask you a question. why do dislike what they're doing so much? seriously, ask yourself that question. is the content that bad, in your eyes? if the answer is yes, i can't help you there. you've grown out of their content. there's no way around it.

- but is it actually bad, or is it just Not What You Expected? In which case, let's talk. Let's put things bluntly:

the dteam have waited years to be together. correct

upon living together, we have discovered that they are not very good at providing content because they put their friendship above content. i'm not sure if anyone had that in their bingo cards - but it's what happened. autumn was really rough on them & they've learnt to exist together off camera. me personally, i think it's sweet.

dteam and traveling: a fall out? :o . no. jesus christ 😭 the fact that this is the new narrative nauseates me. i don't think anyone in their right mind thinks that dteam are less close than they were when they were living apart.

Bringing back our initial point, the failure to meet our expectations can be mentally challenging. it will inevitably make us second guess a lot of associated ideas that we thought were true . if one of our expectations fails to be met, that's a fail in our mental plan. if we were wrong about this, who's to say we are right about anything else?

i'm not sure if there's some sort of denial of feelings here or if people are trying really hard not to think about this possibility because it makes them scared. i am inviting you to take a moment to really think about it and feel the initial dread of the question. it will pass fairly quickly.

the truth is that the dteam is FINE. they're fine, they share a house, they film videos together, and they go on these long ass hiatus when they're together because they would much rather spend uncesored time off-line.

my favorite point: for how parasocial we are, we don't give them nearly enough credit. the dteam are adult men. we have to put faith in their decisions. only they know what they're doing. they know what's best for them. we certainly don't.

- i wanna rescue this last point. their decisions are THEIRS. if we don't put trust in what they're doing, we're already failing the game. that means who they hang out with too. i get not liking someone ok? i get it. i don't like a lot of people either. no one is pointing a gun to any of their heads. if you think that any of them is doing something that you don't see fit you have problems and you need to grow up. it is not our place to dictate their lives and it will never be. that goes for the white-knighting too.

⚠️(this is a completely hypothetical scenario)⚠️

the truth is if tomorrow george decides to go back to the uk, for whatever reason. we would all have to fucking shut it. fan disappointment? yes. acting like george is an awful person for betraying his best friends? you're out of your fucking mind.

dream george and sapnap are grown up people with a strong friendship and communication skills. if you think that george would take the unilateral decision and not tell anyone until the day before you need to seek help. whatever decision the dteam take about their lives it's THEIRS and you need to put some fawking faith in what they're doing. they know what's up.

that goes for the fucking karl problem too okay? i don't like it either. whatever. it's not my place though?? dream isn't a baby who's been abandoned he's a grown ass man who knows what he's doing and if he still considers (if they ALL do) karl his friend that's his decision. if he thinks that karl's friendship management is fine that's his decision. we are not dream's friends nor his fucking therapist.

- the thing about dooming and content. the multishippers: is the dteam all there really is? i firmly believe that we all kove the dteam outside of each other. (mostly tackled in this post)

- dnf and the fandom. jesus christ i can't believe i have to make a point about this. i think it's important to remember that at the end of the day. it's just Not That Serious. it was never meant to be that serious. bringing back the "they're their own people" point, what the Fuck do some people think they're doing 🧍‍♂️

dnf know what they're doing they know the nature of their relationship better than we ever will. if they're just friends it's because they chose to if they . in the biggest plot of the century . come out of this with a s/o it doesn't mean they're cheating on each other, that dream/george was leading anyone on or that they're hurting each other???? are you CRAZY 😭 if they're dating they're dating if they're not they're fucking not but they're. not gonna be sad about it??? they're adult people in an adult relationship they know what tf they're doing. they hold each other's hearts impossibility close to themselves. there's nothing they would ever do that could hurt each other.

to wrap things up: after this reddit worthy post (congrats if you've made it to the end) i have something very important to ask of you guys.

i know it might be unfair but can we all compromise on detoxxing. completely. for like, a week. not posting neg at ALL. we can't enable doomers we can't enable bait anons. neg is only good for one thing: make anxious people paranoid as fuck.

so can we. for like a week. just not post anything /neg at all. can we block the worst of it. the unnecessary dooming. and not acknowledge at ALL. i get it's a huge mental toll on the active blogs - reading so much negativity SUCKS but i do believe that it's a better option than responding and enabling more people to send similar asks.

me personally, i am already saying it here: any dooming will get blocked in my askbox. i won't hate you for it. but this IS a warning that you need to get your shit together if you ever wanna have a chance at speaking in my askbox ever again.

um congrats if you read everything?😭 PLEAAAASE let's all make this place a better place again i know we can do it

U CAN ADD TO THIS POST IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY BTW !!!

[sadistic-softie]

I hate being confrontational or preachy and I've never done it before, and frankly, it scares the shit out of me because I don't want people to think I'm mad at them, but I just need to get this off my chest.

I don't have NPD, but I'm so fucking tired of seeing bullshit CPTSD healing 'resources' that use 'narcissist' as a way to say 'abuser' or assume that all abusers are narcissistic and/or vice versa. Like...I wanna heal my trauma without seeing NPD people being thrown under the bus and stigmatized for something they have no part in. Like...wtf? Is that too much to ask for?? My CPTSD is not because of someones or anyones NPD. It never was and never will be. Apparently this is a hot take, but PTSD in general is not from anyones NPD. PTSD is from TRAUMA and or ABUSE. Apparently this is such a common misconception that even my father believes it. He said, "it's because she's a narcassist" after I talked to him about my mothers abusive behaviors to me. So, yeah...that's an awkward fucking conversation I might have to have eventually?? Narcissist is not another word for abuser. I'm saying this as a victim of abuse. Narcissist is not another word for abuser. Yes, it is possible that an abuser can just so happen to have NPD, but they could also have literally any other disorder and that would't be the cause of abusive behavior. NPD doesn't 'make' someone into an abuser. People with NPD are not all abusers. Not all abusers have NPD. These things are not synonymous. You can not blame abusive behavior on NPD. In my particular situation, my family has fallen into a cycle of abuse type situation, in which each mother was abusive to her daughters, causing the cycle to become seen as 'normal' in the family, thus perpetuating the cycle. An abusers actions are purposefully negative. Even if the intent is not explicitly to abuse or the abuser is not fully aware that they are being abusive. Each individual behavior is done with a certain intent. Manipulation tactics are meant to gain power over a person, constant invasion of privacy is done to control a person, constant belittlement and agression towards a particular person enforces an unhealthy dynamic, unwarrented and or cruel punishments, threats, pushings of boundaries are meant to train a victims actions and mindset, and I don't think I need to explain why physical violence is harmful. The list goes on. None of these abusive behaviors are symptoms of NPD nor fit the description of someone with NPD. These behaviors are abusive, end of sentence. It has nothing to do with NPD. The following are screenshots from a simple Google search (literally bare minimum research) defining Narcassistic Personality Disorder:

I'm sorry is this post overwhelms anyone. I don't want this to feel like a scolding and I really hope I don't sound like I'm trying to take a moral highground because I don't wanna make anyone feel like they're a bad person or anything like that. I know my wording and tone in this post is quite agressive compared to how I usually am, and I apoligize for that. I also wanna make it clear that this is not directed at anyone or any group of people in particular. Also, take this with a grain of salt too, as I'm not a professional in any field whatsoever and these are just my personal thoughts and frustrations. I hope you have a wonderful day if you're reading this and if you aren't. Thank you.

[antiproshipconfessions]

TW: Pedophilia mention (but it's in the form of misinformation getting spread about age regression), slavery mention, rape, ableism, gaslighting

So glad a blog like this exists.

I've gotten plenty of bad experiences with proshippers. One of them was identifying themselves as an anti-anti, but for some contrived reasons, they don't allow any proshippers to follow them, was even ok with one person who's a proshipper themselves to get taken down (due to the individual not tagging stuff properly, is a ban-evader, the rabbit hole for that person got deeper and deeper mostly because they admit to ban-evading all the time since they get mass reported. Their white knights fucking harassed the hell out of me by indirectly mocking my dni and even dragged my mutuals into it, most don't even know who tf this proshipper is. It's over making a doc on the person. I had to get my username changed due to this so they can't think of trying to falsely report me and potentially be why my account is banned on here.)

They say they're neutral about the discourse but then here's where I'm doubting their stance on that: they kept excusing people who are proshippers that it's ok to ship abusive ships just because they had an abusive childhood, even though they themselves don't condone toxic/abusive ships and minor x adult. (This part imo doesn't make sense, since they blocked people who use age regression as a coping mechanism and literally believes people who use it is the same as behaving like a pedophile along with it being a kink. I hate how they asked me in DMs to reassure them they aren't ableist for shaming people for using that as a coping mechanism.)

This person was a former mutual of mine because they genuinely believed that I'm acting like a rabid anti all because I answered their questions about what ships I hated to them (cuz one was a real historical figure getting shipped with their slave owner, the disgusting thing about it is that there's a au fic about it that had the guy get what he wanted and the author was 100% romanticizing rape and slavery. They also refused to add a warning and people legit saw it as a love story when it's not), I vent/rant on my blog frequently (I've been at least getting outside help for this, dw).

The anti proshipping stuff hadn't been a reason why they blocked me, it was over something they think is "controversial": I had stuff stating "narcissistic abuse believers dni" in my pinned post and "narcissistic abuse isn't real" in reblogs of people's posts. They think having that shit is "proof" someone's admitting to being a person with NPD. They made that callout post on me for being someone who thinks it's unfair to be ableist towards people with PDs for the majority of it besides claiming I'm a rabid anti (again, makes no sense cuz they linked an article that says shipping discourse is chronically online but doesn't check to read the whole thing through to realize the article isn't siding with an anti-anti like them. They are siding with antis the whole time.).

Really am surprised they still got a following (one thing that made me go yikes is how they got a mutual they recently made that thinks like them. These people got a callout for being blatantly ableist towards people with PDs, evidently obvious with how they think people aren't human beings if they got NPD) despite the shit they put me through, I had to be off of this site for a mental health break around in August-September because it really hurt that they accused me of having NPD, I genuinely trusted them and they in return stabbed me in the back.

Other proshippers I've got don't check my pinned post to realize I'm not on their side to then follow me and get me blocked (hell, even had one like my post then do the usual: blocking time).

With that being said, these are why I refuse to be a proshipper and could you blame me for not being one?

i wanna follow you, and if you need to you can vent/rant in my dms. I'm really, really sorry this happened to you

[nothorses]

As someone who doesn’t fall within the LGBT part of the acronym I’m still more uncomfortable with queer as the umbrella because it feels like the last progressively acceptable way to be exclusionary. Obvs plenty of folks still judge whether ppl are gay/trans enough. But doing that is at least explicitly not acceptable in the spaces I wanna be in. Whereas it’s accepted and sometimes encouraged to criticize or even exclude ppl for not being queer enough (in theory a political call, in practice a judgement on identity and presentation). I do still use queer to signal correctly, but it does not sit well for that reason. Wish there was a third option w/no political history, but I know we’d just do this to whatever new term we came up with too

I mean, I think "I know we’d just do this to whatever new term we came up with too" kind of hits the nail on the head here.

This isn't something that happens because of the word, it's something that happens because of the people. The word itself is not inherently exclusive; in fact, it's explicitly all-inclusive. It's for anyone who falls outside of the relevant societal expectations, by definition, and there is no list or any further defining or qualifying that needs to be done.

The issue with "LGBT", and any variation thereof, is that it's a list. It starts with the letters people consider most important to start with (hence, "GL" becoming "LG"). Even if it didn't, it requires that we name every single kind of person who's welcome, individually, which inevitably leaves people out- or tells them that they aren't welcome on the terms of their more "niche" identities, but rather only if they happen to have a more visible and accepted one alongside it. (See: "straight asexuals aren't LGBT")

People can still act exclusionary regardless of word choice, but if the words they're using do not themselves reinforce or encourage that way of thinking and behaving, it's kind of ridiculous to pin the blame for that on the words. People are going to do that with any word we use- at some point we have to decide whether the fight should be in finding a new word each time they do it, or in getting them to stop behaving that way in the first place.

Also... I'm sorry you've experienced this, and I think it needs to be addressed. But speaking personally, that experience isn't universal. When folks have gatekept who "counts", in my personal experience, they've overwhelmingly been using "LGBT" (or just "LGB"). If they use "queer" at all, it's interchangeable with that and other terms. Again, not to say that your experience doesn't matter- it does- but so do other people's.

You don't need to use "queer" for yourself if you don't want to. You also don't need to use "LGBT" or any variation. But we're not talking about personal identification, either; this is about which word is most practically useful and effective in achieving our goals of maximum inclusivity and clarity.