#i don't usually hc sexualities but this HAS to be canon

[xandersrailcrash]

Clark is definitely that guy everyone thought was gay until he got a girlfriend and you can't tell me otherwise

we all know a guy like this istg

[the-s1lly-corner]

Pet names (hazbin edition)

If you guys want me to do some of the other usual characters i write for when it comes to hazbin, let me know! i usually go on ahead and do 3 separate posts for "series" like this but given that these are such short posts with little substance... ill be leaving it up to you guys!

Characters: Charlie, Vaggie, Angel, Husk, Sir Pentious, Alastor

Notes: reader is mostly gn, make reader for angel, fem reader for vaggie, otherwise I will do my best to provide gn/alt variations for any gendered names/names that are traditionally gendered, very short post only really focuses on names rather than scenarios, Alastor is a late addition to the post but his part can be seen as either platonic or queer platonic, use of "they" in this but its not that a pronoun hc i just copy/pasted the thing and didnt feel like editing the pronouns LMAO

CWs: none

CHARLIE

What they call you: Will call you anything you want to be called but I feel she has a love for some of the less common nicknames: Sunshine, Pumpkin, and so on! More often than not she calls you a shortened version of your name

What they like to be called: Similarly she's fine with anything you want to call her as long as it's nothing too dirty or mean, funny enough Sunshine also fits her!

VAGGIE

What they call you: Given that Vaggie canonically calls Charlie "Babe", I don't think it would be too far of a stretch to assume that she would call you the same as a general pet name! Also tends to call you by your nam

What they like to be called: She likes being called by her name, but if you say it when shes in the right mood shes fine with a lot of things!

ANGEL DUST

What they call you: If I said any examples I wouldn't be able to say this blog isn't NSFW/lh but also... It wouldn't be a surprise that he calls you some more vulgar names.. but in a non sexual setting? Babe is his go to for you!

What they like to be called: To the shock of absolutely no one... Love bug is a pretty basic one that hes pretty receptive too, but if you somehow find one in the same vein thats more unique hes going to be all over it

HUSK

What they call you: Sugar, Hon, Babe are his main three asides from simply saying your name. I mentioned before that affection isnt really his thing, at least not being open or overly so... I can see this spreading to verbal stuff too.. he does love you, of course

What they like to be called: Stud, though he seems to try to fight himself to not roll his eyes... Handsome, Lover, just to name a few

SIR PENTIOUS

What they call you: Darling, Dear, Dearest, Love, things like that that kind of give an "older" feel since hes from the victorian era... actually I can see him dropping a few that were popular when he was alive! Also calls you by your name... simply saying someones name is nice, it feels personal and intimate you know, in the right setting

What they like to be called: Happy with whatever you call him, you can call him Handsome or Sweetheart or even a Cutie Patootie... it doesn't matter, hes going to wear it like a badge of honor!

ALASTOR

What they call you: He already calls people things like Dear/Darling, so this ones a given! Can see him calling you Lovely as well

What they like to be called: Prefers his name but under the correct circumstances he lets you call him Hon in return

[pinkgy]

Since Andrealphus just came out, could I request some nsfw headcanons for him and maybe also Raphael?

Hi!

Tysm for your request! I'm sorry for taking so long, when I got your request I was late with the event content, and I preferred to delay so I could read it well and make a decent post as accurate as possible. (I forgot to read the event story btw and I had writer's block related to Raphael so :)

𝗪𝗛𝗕 𝗔𝗡𝗗𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗟𝗣𝗛𝗨𝗦 𝗥𝗔𝗣𝗛𝗔𝗘𝗟 𝗡𝗦𝗙𝗪 𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗖𝗔𝗡𝗢𝗡𝗦

𝗣𝗧. 𝟭

GN! Reader + No mentions of Gender-Specific Anatomy.

I made a tiny headcanon with an M!Reader on Raphael's part, I don't know I just felt like it, I'm not used to this tho, it's probably going to be a last, I'm more comfortable writing for GN Reader and Fem Reader.

I'm sorry if I'm missing some canon hcs about Raphael, a certain someone (me) was unlucky with the seals and forgot to read the prologue of his Christmas card. If you could point out some of them I would be really grateful.

𝗖𝗪: Very brief mention of Andrealphus philia (Oculophilia), F!Reader, and M!Reader in Raphael's, but just one headcanon, Oral (M Receiving), Deepthroating, Squirting, a bit of blood play, fingering, nipple play, dirty talk, degradation.

𝗔𝗡𝗗𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗟𝗣𝗛𝗨𝗦

➜ He's dominant most of the time, he wouldn't complain if you want to take care of him, but still, he always likes to have some type of dominance over you.

➜ He is a very soft dom, the Andrealphus he shows to others and the one he shows to you are very different but don't be fooled, he can be a little bit of a bitch when he wants to, specially when you tease him

➜ He's not very vocal when he's with you, he might let out a few grunts, but that's as far as it goes. it's not that he holds back or anything, it's just that he likes to show how much he wants you in other ways.

➜But on the other hand, he doesn't shut his mouth when he talks dirty to you, Andrealphus loves to whisper in your ear everything he wants to do to you in detail while he is buried deep inside you, and in between sentences, he kisses and licks your neck.

➜ Andrealphus curses his blindness because he can't see the expressions you make when he's pleasuring you. He would die to have a glimpse of you when he makes you cum. But he settles for putting his fingers in your mouth and cupping your cheeks between his hands.

➜ I think it is perfectly clear that Andrealphus is very clingy with you, he can never stop touching you, for him it is directly impossible to cum if he is not touching you or is not close to you if you were to forbid him to do that by teasing him, he would get reeeeally needy, and if you were to prolong this "punishment", he might even be little more mean that usual with you.

➜ I see Andrealphus being into those positions where he gets to hold you, if he had to pick favorites, they would be full Nelson and Mating Press. He loves both of them for similar reasons, he gets to be very close to you, and his face is close to yours so he can clearly hear all your moans and tell you all kinds of dirty things.

➜ His go-to foreplay consists of sucking your nipples hard and biting them hard while he fingers you, especially in that position where you are sitting on his lap, with your legs wrapped around his torso, one hand holding your back and the other a mess about of your parts.

“Let me hear you pretty, every word you say and every sound you make, that just makes me want to fuck you harder”

𝗥𝗔𝗣𝗛𝗔𝗘𝗟

➜ He's versatile, he doesn't lean either way, he enjoys having you reclining on a table with a vibrator inside you playing (torturing) with your most sensitive parts as much as having him tied to a bed gagged, with his body full of bites and scratches, and you overstimulating him for hours.

➜ Any sexual practice that includes making a mess of you or him gets him rock-hard, but his personal favorite has to be you cuming in his face.

Cis!M: Deepthroat him, don't cum in his throat, cum all over his face and then spread your seed all over it. Do that and he might cum in his pants untouched.

Cis!F: Raphael would even be grateful if you squirted in his face, you don't even have to take control, just let him eat you out until he's pleased and he'll become the happiest angel out there.

➜ If you're comfortable with it, he might draw a little blood out of your neck or your chest, and if you're not comfortable, he'll do it anyways and will excuse himself that it was an accident.

➜ Raphael is into being degraded, but he has a limit, if he notices that you are going a little too far with your words he will start to give them back to you in a more abrupt way, and until you are completely silent and with nothing more to say, he will not stop, he may also use other ways to make you shut up, putting his dick deep in your throat is usually the most efficient way for him.

➜ He's that type of person who gets aroused by pleasuring you and only you, he's into that humiliation that comes when he cums untouched. And to no one's surprise, the more you think you have power over him, the more Raphael has dominance over you, and as humiliated as he may appear to be, you are the one who is really humiliated.

➜ He's great at fingering, but he's a little bit of a bitch with it. Raphael is into edging, he hates being edged, but he loves doing that to you. And his favorite way to do it is with his hands. He knows perfectly well how to use them and he's very skilled. One of his favorite things to do is to push his fingers deep into your hole while with his other hand, he pinches your nipples hard or rubs your most sensitive parts.

➜ According to some math I did just now, he’s smaller than Michael and about the same size as Gabriel, Gabriel looks a bit girthier I believe. I would say that his dick fully erect could be approx 20 cm (7.8 inches), curves a bit upright and has a very pink tip, and flushes a lot when he’s about to cum, # 4011 UP. His tip is also very prominent and it stretches you slightly painfully when he enters you.

➜ Among the seraphim, Raphael is the one who has more stamina, he's one of those who once he starts it is difficult for him to stop, and at the beginning, it will be difficult to know how to satisfy him completely to not to be practically all day giving pleasure (or not) to each other. (he's one of those who may have cum seconds before, and his dick will still be erect)

“Don’t be a little bitch and stay still, didn’t you say I was being too rough with you ? If you can’t take my cock like an obedient slut then take my fingers the way I want you to”

⋯⋯⋯

This is a part one ! I’ll be making some mini one shots based on this headcanons after I’m done with a rewuesy that I accidentally procrastinated.

The one shots are to compensate for taking so long with this :( I was supposed to post them today but I don’t know what happened to me while writing the Andrealphus one and I ended up making a one shot that was very fucked up, so I redoing it.

Hope you have an amazing day ♡♡♡

[midniiights-garden]

Modern!Mizu General Headcanons!!

I have so many many ideas for Modern!Mizu omg you don't understand (I wish she was real...)

Ok, so first of all I wanna start out with some HCs about her past and her mother.

I think she probably grew up in rural Japan, her relationship with her mother basically still the same as in the show.

Due to not being exposed to very many foreigners her relationship with her peers was strained because of her blue eyes (ofc. hate discrimination smHHH)

Anyways, although Mizu doesn't have to hide her gender, and I personally headcanon that Modern!Mizu wouldn't hide it, she still has some internalized mysogyny.

This is namely due to the huge issue with sexisim in Japan, sexual harassment and sexualisation of women and so on. Mizu grew up wishing she was a boy because she didn't want to feel like a piece of meat to be eyed up and down and sold.

I HC that she meets the Swordfather when she attempted to run away from home. Probably due to another bullying incident or something.

In my head she actually moves to America or Europe to study something related to craftsmanship or to become a professional martial artist. It makes the most sense in my head at least.

She got into Uni on a scholarship lol. I mean, translated into a modern setting I do think her skill would be enough to warrant a large scholarship.

University was a rough time in the beginning for her due to the many changes that come with moving to a new country, as myself and most other third country kids will know.

Mizu had to juggle learning English, beating racist asshole and school all at the same time.

Due to her reluctance to socialize she also struggles to learn English in the verbal sense. She learned how to read and write in English much faster than to speak it because she had no one practice with. That, and she refused to talk to anyone.

As for how she met Mikio...

Modern!Mizu probably met him because he was a teacher at her Uni.

Long story short when he finds out how she was concieved and how strong he is, well, big strong man gets emasculated and throws a fit and Mizu leaves him (as she should)

And then she realises she's gay lol

I think it'd happen in a pretty similar fashion as to Canon!Mizu but you can look at my headcanons for those if you need them.

I think the main differences between Modern!Mizu and Canon!Mizu would primarily be in how she deals with her rage. Of course, Modern!Mizu isn't allowed the luxury of just stabbing people to get revenge so I believe she may resort to a lot of physical exertion in the gym or just a lot of lashing out towards people in general.

(A/N: Yayayayayya second post for the day!!! As usual, if anyone has any requests or anything feel free to ask!! Happy holidays everyone!!! <3)

[onesidedradiostatic]

If velvette is aroace and Val is demiromantic does this make vox the token allo

reference to this ask? I think it is? but um

I think you missed out part of my answer anon

I like the idea of alloro demisexual vox, mostly cause val and alastor are both people vox has known for AGES (longer than you or I have been alive) and well he made sexual comments in relation to alastor in episode 8 and makes out with and sleeps with val but was literally the only vee completely uninterested in lucifer's "NOW I am going to FUCK you" to adam (in the case of aroace velvette idk maybe velvette is aegosexual, I don't usually hold onto it though cause I don't have a solid velvette sexuality hc)

incredibly funny to me he just lost all interest after alastor fled, was screaming about how hard he was and how watching alastor get the shit beaten out of him was better than sex but the prospect of lucifer and adam going at it in bed? uninterested.

alloromantic is just cause the idea of vox love at first sight-ing alastor is funny to me (but I'm fine with that not being the case) and it's like the inverse of demiro allosexual val. I mean I'd just as easily buy him being double demi but idk, vox being alloromantic is just funny to me especially in the context of having interest in arospec people (alastor (canon) and val (hc))

[boom-butterflyeffect]

FUCK I accidentally fucked up my Chris post and the ask got deleted, but HERE'S THAT

Chris Hartley NSFW Alphabet

A - Aftercare

What. A. Sweetheart. Chris makes sure you're all comfortable and taken care of, double checks everything, and absolutely showers you with attention and affection.

B - Body Part (His favourite body part on himself and you)

Tbh, I think hands for both. He loves how big and strong his hands are, and how, in comparison, yours are smaller. He thinks it's adorable. He loves holding your hands.

C - Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Chris loves the expressions and sounds you make when you cum, makes him feel like he's doing a good job.

D - Dirty Secret

He would be embarrassed and secretive about the fact that he has dirty fantasies about you.

E - Experience (How experienced he is)

I don't imagine him having a LOT of experience considering he's canonically considered the "nerd" of the group, but I don't think he'd be a total virgin either. I'm not sure.

F - Favorite position

I feel like he'd enjoy missionary or having you in his lap, your chests pressed together and just giving each other sweet kisses.

G - Goofy (Is he more serious in the moment?)

He's so silly, and will try to keep the mood light. Being too serious makes him feel a bit nervous/tense, so it's nice to joke around and feel relaxed, just having a good time!

H - Hair

It's fairly cleaned up, maybe just a little blond happy trail.

I - Intimacy

He's very intimate and romantic, and would want every time to be special and meaningful. He wants it all to be perfect, and gets nervous about the idea of things going wrong.

J - Jack off

I feel like he would not do it himself as often, but would REALLY like it when YOU jack him off.

K - Kink

Size difference!!! Bro is TALL!!!

L - Location

I feel like Chris would be more private, and keep sexual activity in the bedroom, maybe on the couch when it's just the two of you.

M - Motivation

Same as Mike, seeing you in his clothes, especially because of how much taller he is.

N - No (Hard limits)

Anything that could at all hurt you. Again, same as Mike, I feel like he wouldn't be too interested in anything on the more extreme side of kink.

O - Oral

More of a giver than a receiver, very much a service top who loves to know that you're feeling good.

P - Pace

I think he'd be more slow and gentle, taking his time and making sure everything is comfortable and feeling good.

Q - Quickie

I can't imagine Chris being a fan of quickies, I feel like sex is a lot about the intimacy for him, and quickies don't have that emotional aspect that he craves from it.

R - Risk

Not a lot of risk, Chris likes to keep things sweet and intimate.

S - Stamina

I do like the idea of like- lazy cuddle sex, I can't see him being like super riled up and going for ages.

T - Toys

I couldn't imagine Chris owning or using toys, tbh.

U - Unfair

He's a sweetheart and I stand by that. He jokes around and will playfully tease, or suggest the idea of teasing, but at the end of the day, making you feel good and making sure you both enjoy yourselves is his top priority.

V - Volume

He tries to stay quiet, you can usually just hear him panting and the occasional curse or whine under his breath.

W - Wild card (Random NSFW HC of my choosing)

He LOVES when you're on top of him, controlling the pace. He kinda likes the idea of giving you control, because then he knows whatever you're doing is feeling good, and he trusts you to make him feel good too.

X - X-ray (Size)

Again, like 7.5/8 inches, I do not really know what is realistic here, tbh.

Y - Yearning

I think he would not be as pent up as the others, but some days would just really crave the intimacy and the romance of it all, just wanting you in his arms.

Z - Zzz

He'd stay up and take care of you until YOU fall asleep first, giving you little forehead kisses and just cuddling and making sure you're comfortable, and that everything he did was okay and felt good, and he'd just whisper to you how beautiful you are. Only once you're asleep and he knows you feel happy and content, will he fall asleep.

THATS IT THANKS

thank you @z0mb1epuzzy helping me w these because it's 2 in the morning and i've been sat here staring at my phone like a fucking lemon trying to come up with this stuff

THE PERSON WHO SENT THE ASK FOR MATT, YOURS WILL BE NEXT!

[aruanimess]

You should totally do HCs for AOT characters. I know you want to😎

🌟

The gender/sexuality HCs? Oh, anon, you shouldn't be enabling me like that... (pls continue)

Okay, so the reason I was hesitant to do this is that I'm usually a "bi until proven otherwise" type of person, but here we go-

Before I begin, disclaimer 1: I consider pan and bi to be very similar sexualities, being bi doesn't mean you're not attracted to nbs (at least imo). The difference lies in whether or not the gender of your partner factors in the attraction you're experiencing (again imo).

Disclaimer 2: This is all in good fun, not meant to be taken too seriously, and obviously if you disagree that's all right 💕

So without further ado:

Eren (he/him): Heteroflexible, but also demisexual. Boy needs a strong bond to penetrate the wall of tatakae and get him to feel attraction. His implied but not canonically explicit crushes on Annie and Historia, only confirm this for me bc he only became interested in them after he learned more about the way they think. Mikasa is obviously his best friend, and Armin, his other best friend, puts the flexible into the heteroflexible.

Mikasa (she/her): Pansexual, also demisexual. She doesn't care about her partner's gender, only about their heart. She has trouble getting attached, but once she does she's ride or die!

Armin (he/they): Bisexual. You know the meme that goes, "I'm probably nonbinary but I don't have time for that"? Yeah, that's Armin. He do be fighting demons, and the demons are his relationship to masculinity. They like macho dudes (the ones they envy/they eeeenvy 🎶) and people who intimidate them.

Annie (she/they): Bisexual. Unlike Armin her nonbinary inclinations are not over some angst with womanhood, she simply sometimes wishes not to be perceived in any particular way. She likes boys if they're nice, girls if they're cool and nbs... nbs are just hot.

Jean (he/him): Pansexual. I don't think gender matters to him, he judges people through their actions, though, and oh boy... he's a harsh judge!

Connie (he/hee): Pansexual aromantic. Sorry, this boy is all about friendship, the other thing he just doesn't get. His friends will be his family, not his future spouse. He still gets around though 👀

Sasha (she/her): Demisexual, demiromantic, straight. Niccolo. Need I explain more?

Bertolt (he/him): He thinks he's straight but he's actually bi.

Reiner (he/him): Homoflexible. Mainly gay, but an exceptional woman can make him change his mind.

Historia (she/her): GAY, GAY, HOMOSEXUAL, GAY. Les-be-honest this woman is a lesbian.

Ymir (she/they): c'mon, she's a giant lesbian!

Pieck (she/her): okay, I know it's a hot take, but I think she's straight. Like who in their right mind rejects Hange? Clearly straight. (And I don't want to hear about Yelena because, again, who in their right mind rejects Hange but wants Yelena?? NO) She's polyamorous though.

Hange (they/them): Pansexual. Canonical crushes involve Keith Shadis and Pieck. They clearly don't care about their partner's gender, only their levels of weirdness. Their gender is mad scientist.

Levi (he/him): another hot take, I think he's aroace.

[erynshouseofhorrors]

My Queer Marble Hornets Headcanons

This is mostly going to be Alex, Jay, Brian, and Tim since I'm not as familiar with the other characters. Jessica's at the end but there's not a lot, so I welcome people to add on!

Warning: Tim/Brian/Unnamed OC, Jay/Alex, Amy/Jessica, and mentioned Alex/Amy. Obviously very little of this is canon lol.

Jay Merrick

Jay is canonically gay and I think that just fits. He didn't find out he was gay until their junior year of high school, thanks to a guy whose name he has long forgotten.

Jay is definitely transmasc. I don't think they're entirely male, but not exactly both male and female. He's somewhere in-between male and neutral. I purposefully left their AGAB up to interpretation, I think it could go either way. Transmasc just means identifying with a masc gender that you weren't assigned at birth.

Jay uses he/they pronouns.

The first person outside of Jay's family that they came out to was Alex during their sophomore year of university. Alex is also the only one of his friends aware of Jay's struggle with gender identity, making their bond extra special. Eventually Jessica would also be looped in on that secret.

He thinks about using makeup, but they're too scared to actually buy himself anything in fear of judgement... until Alex bought him an eyeshadow palette.

They actually got pretty good at applying and styling makeup, and he helped Alex out by being the makeup artist (and script supervisor) for Marble Hornets.

Alex Kralie

I can't picture him dating a girl and actually enjoying it. His relationship with labels is difficult, because he struggles to tell the difference between romantic attraction and platonic love, which is mostly why he got with Amy to begin with. They broke up because Alex wouldn't take their relationship past a kiss on the cheek and arm around the shoulder.

When he met Jay his freshman year of uni, that was the first time he felt physically attracted to someone. The weeks to follow were filled with "am I gay" quizzes and articles.

Alex only settled on the gay label for the sake of convenience. He doesn't mind going unlabeled or switching labels around as things change and his relationships grow.

He probably doesn't know this yet, but he's definitely on the asexual spectrum. He feels sexual attraction, but only sometimes. I hc him as either greyace or demiace.

Alex uses he/him pronouns.

Brian Thomas

Brian uses both pansexual and bisexual to describe his sexuality. "Ass is ass, man. I don't care."

His sexuality has never been something he hid, but it also wasn't obvious to his straight peers. He'll casually bring up an ex-boyfriend or first kiss and everyone has their jaw on the floor. Almost everyone. Tim's usually in the corner of the room, smirking at their obliviousness.

Brian uses he/him pronouns, but he won't flip his lid if someone calls him something else. He knows his identity isn't defined by how others choose to perceive him.

He's definitely that friend who's known they were gay since grade school, so he's well educated on queer history and terminology. He even helped Alex and Tim out while they were questioning.

He dated Tim in their early years at uni, but split up after Tim had a mental breakdown and ghosted him for a few months.

Brian is also ambiamorous, which means he's okay with being in a monogamous or polyamorous relationship. This is partly why he wasn't too upset when Tim moved on and started dating a girl from another town. Why try bagging your ex when you can bag him and his new girlfriend, am I right?

Tim Wright

Tim never bothered with sexuality labels until he was finally free of psychosis and constant hospital visits. He was too busy fighting for his life to think and fantasize about love interests.

He was completely convinced he was straight until he and Brian shared a drunken kiss the night after final exams. After that, he and Brian were hooking up in secret, and Tim was having an identity crisis behind the scenes.

Tim and Brian were together for at least a few months before Tim ghosted him. It wasn't his fault, or Brian's. Tim's psychosis had been coming back, causing him to self-isolate out of paranoia. Whenever Brian tried reaching out, Tim replied with radio silence.

After getting better (again) he was too scared to contact Brian, so he forced himself to move on. And he did! He started dating a girl he met while working, and things just kind of took off. And then Brian enters his life again.

His girlfriend, surprisingly, was amused by Brian's flirtatious remarks toward her and Tim, and even teased back. After a long conversation with Tim, they decided to ask Brian out.

Tim still doesn't care for labels, but when asked he'll say he's bisexual and ambiamorous. Also he uses he/him because I forgot to mention that.

Jessica Locke

I believe someone working with Troy on the comics believes Jessica is a lesbian and honestly I love that interpretation. Nothing about her screams "straight" to me.

I truly, truly believe Jessica is trans MTF. She does voice training every morning to get better at sounding feminine, mostly to avoid harassment from her peers.

She's incredibly skilled with makeup, since she's had lots of practice in middle school. She was the one Jay came to when he got his first eyeshadow palette from Alex.

Jessica was there for Amy when she and Alex split. They had a sleep over for three nights in a row, ignoring the fact that they were roommates and already slept in the same building. They switched back and forth between Jessica's room and Amy's, making pillow forts and watching cartoons until all thoughts of Alex were gone. A month later, Amy asked Jessica on a date.

Honestly I think she'd be okay with any variant of she/her, so get creative.

aaaaaaa I hope you enjoyed! I haven't posted any headcanons before so I am nervous lol also fyi I didn't proofread this so oh well

[kaurwreck]

If you want can you post your skk hcs? I was rereading you fanfic snippets of them and just wanted to know what you try to add in when writing them?

ty for asking about my skk headcanons! i'll share the ones that you can nearly always presume to be "canon" in the fics I write.

Chuuya has a vulva + internal reproductive organs, but with so few memories prior to the Sheep, he doesn't recall having an assigned gender divergent from his own and has always known himself to be a boychild. He's rarely been prompted to think anything of it: the Sheep didn't make a fuss when he started menstruating, although Shirase did defer to Yuan to teach him how to manage it once they realized; Mori educated him on his options once Mori became aware but was otherwise unfazed and had forged Chuuya's koseki anyway; etc., etc. Which isn't to say Chuuya doesn't pursue and receive gender affirming care, only that he's both self-assured in his own and rather naive regarding matters of gender and sexuality. (i.e., insofar as trans is a useful framework here, he's trans.)

Dazai is ashamed of his sexual attraction. Not in his sexuality (as in preferences), but he thinks his sexual attraction is, generally, an imposition and a vulgar burden he thrusts onto others. This doesn't stop him from feeling it and pursuing others. It's just one of the many contours of his self-loathing.

Dazai and Chuuya weren't completely no-contact for those four years, but they talk about it as if they were.

Chuuya has a Port Mafia-subsidized penthouse with an aboveground wine cellar. He still frequents the Agency dorms; he doesn't like Dazai snooping around and making messes in his penthouse. Or stealing his wine and wine paraphernalia for wine fraud, which happens sometimes and has, previously, fucked with the integrity of Chuuya's cache of Romanée Conti vintages.

Chuuya is a workaholic and very driven in his commitment to his organization. Dazai cherishes and serves at the leisure of the hand that feeds him but isn't. Quite as career oriented as Chuuya.

Both are polyamorous more or less. But exceedingly possessive of the other in hyperspecific, sometimes toxic ways.

Chuuya has extensive irezumi beneath his clothes, much of which memorializes his loved ones. (Including Dazai, but most everyone knows better than to acknowledge those pieces.) Dazai, meanwhile, doesn't have any tattoos; he can't tolerate the needles (whether hand or electric). Dazai will join Chuuya during his sessions, though, if only to bother him in ways Chuuya can't do anything about while being tattooed.

They don't negotiate anything, which is usually fine. They work it out one way or another when it's not.

They have several intricate rituals to navigate around each other's severe intimacy issues.

While they were both in the Port Mafia, there was a strict mandate against Dazai riding passenger on Chuuya's motorcycle. Enforceable by any member of the organization regardless of rank.

They're technically legally married under Dazai's birth identity (Shuuji Tsushima); that's also the identity with which Chuuya has a joint bank account and multiple tax fraud schemes (in which Akutagawa and Gin are also implicated as dependents), among other things. (Note: I've unilaterally decided Japan recognizes same sex marriage in bsd-verse, especially given the plethora of anachronistic, fictitious, and quirky policies, ministries, levers of governance, etc. canonical to bsd-verse that preclude the canonical existence of several of Japan's current irl legal institutions, including its constitution as amended.)

[chumpsalmon]

HC Ramblings for all the mercsxreader

Cw: nsfw content

Scout: He loves to swim!! He lives for the beach!! He wants to go to trampoline parks with you. This dude is just full of energy all the time. Super active guy who's also a beach volleyball WARRIOR!!!!!! Dont play w him! He also loves to end an active day with fucking the shit out of you. This day has been full of excitement and it's the cherry on top for him to please you. I believe this guys an anal FIEND, too, giving AND RECIEVING prob mweh heh heh

Demoman: Gets Crunk and gets horny!!! This may be strange but I would like to write something where he double teams you with soldier. I think this guy massages your feet, too. Nothing sexual just like a respect thing. Don't play w me foots rubs are soo nice..

Medic: evil af. probably neglectful or gay.. on the other hand period sex tho...

Engineer: Ugh this handsome man loves to ramble to you! He loves just talking to you about his smart stuff, and helping you try to understand it. If youre intrigued and ask to learn hes marrying you on the spot. I believe this guy also loves sex toys --- He's never gonna reject the opportunity to utilize toys to make you feel twice as good. He's comfortable and confident in his abilities. He's a soft lover, and loooves to give you some princess treatment when the opportunity arises- also has dirty finger nails that are perma-stained by oil.

Heavy: big.. whoa. super tender and loving! he loves to spoil you and i would like to think hes big on back massages. also hes a little more on the submissive side. I think he's an incredible listener and will neverrrr forget a thing.

Sniper: Stinky man. Mans man. 3-1 shampoo/conditioner/bodywash- man. Despite this his musk is still quite nice i think tbh i love stinky men. i like to think he also has like a slight tummy you know just a lil bit. it is canon he crochets so i believe he will make a little blanket for you. Not real big on pda but loves to tease you in public. i think he loves road head. i believe hes super dominate and loves to take out his frustrations in the bedroom. Loooooves prey/pred play.

Spy: Loves to shower with you - watch you shower (esp when you dont know hes watching). Big on spoiling you. Doesn't let you do a thing when you guys are relaxing with each other. He's a true gentleman. I think he likes to be tied up sometimes, too. Probably a fan of threesomes.

Pyro: lights you on fire. just kidding. I think they love wax play, temp play, stuff like that. on the other side of that really loving, cuddle bug when it comes to just chillin with each other.

Soldier: OORHAHHHH!!! Loves to throw you around. Dominate and a proud American patriot. Pretty vanilla sex besides tying you up because thats cool. unintentionally bullies you sometimes. very sweet though nonetheless, Usually i imagine he takes a nurturing role but sometimes i believe secretly alone when he's with you he wants to be little spoon and be cared for on the occasion.

[rainesol]

TWST Main Cast Pride Headcanons!!!

Compiling all of my personal twst gender/sexuality headcanons into one post 💪

Disclaimer: I won’t bother with a DNI, however I won’t indulge any discourse or homo/trans/aphobia on this post. You will be blocked and promptly clowned on in the group chat. o7

Heartslabyul

Riddle Rosehearts:

Riddle is an interesting character to me. I don’t think he’s the type to put a label onto his sexuality, but I headcanon bi with a female preference. Gender identity wise, I think within the current storyline he is satisfied with he/him pronouns. Best way to put it into words is that I think he’s nonbinary and uses he/him, but doesn’t have a label for that either. After finding out the custom, he always introduces himself and gives his pronouns.

I choose to interpret his line about enjoying the way his heels click as gender euphoria that just went unrecognised. At the time that I’m writing this, the Lost In The Book event isn’t out on en, but through this translation, you can see that any problems he had with the outfit came from the amount of skin shown rather than the actual presentation. I wholeheartedly believe that if he had been magical-girled into a sundress he’d have been totally cool with it.

As an extra note, I’ve seen a couple of transfem Riddle headcanons that I love. I’d love to see more fics with that concept in the fandom. Or I could do it myself lol.

Ace Trappola:

We know that Ace has canonically had a girlfriend in the past, and found her boring. Not nice. He also says that he decided that dating was a pain and he prefers just hanging out with his friends. I get it. I’m aroace and I’ve confessed that I’m biased and projecting 😔 But like. Come on. I’m choosing to interpret him as aromantic/arospec. Let me cling on to the representation that I made up in my head. I don’t have any specific gender headcanons on this guy. I just view him as cis. He/him.

Deuce Spade:

Deuce is another guy I don’t have much for </3 I usually view him as a gay man in my head? He/him pronouns, cisgender. I think he’s surprisingly more open to gender non-conformity than people expect of him, though. (For instance, the ballet lessons.)

Cater Diamond:

It’s canon in the jp server that Cater has interest in dating both men and women. I’m with everyone else in viewing him as canon bisexual. I headcanon him as having a male preference, but sometimes that changes.

It’s obvious what I’ll say about his gender, but for sure under the nonbinary umbrella. We all saw the guitar strap. Maybe demiboy? He/they. Cater is very online, and considering that the nonbinary flag is ten years old, he or his elder sisters might remember its creation.

Anyways, here’s the nonbinary flag colour picked from his club groovy, and the bisexual flag picked from his Halloween groovy! :D

Trey Clover:

Trey is typically a cis dude in my head. (He/him) He's the supportive older brother type, so I imagine that he keeps the Heartslabyul public bathrooms stocked on pads. I don't know how helpful he would be with advice, but he'll hear you out or refer you to the guidance councillor if that's what you want o7 I don't think the NRC guidance councillors are much help though. Maybe just speak to your homeroom teacher.

I hc that Trey likes men and women with no preference, but just isn't very vocal about it. It'll come up in casual conversation, but I don't think he'd see the point in telling someone unless it was relevant. You'd be having a casual convo with him in the common room, and he might make a reference to a guy he had a crush on in secondary school. Cue SnapCube 'Woah, he's bisexual, I didn't know that!'

Savanaclaw

Leona Kingscholar:

I've seen so many 'token cishet' Leona headcanons that I cant help but to absorb it a little. I do have another headcanon that he experiences some same-sex attraction, but he's got such high standards that he rarely notices any attraction at all. He/him. Maybe poly cause lions?

Jack Howl:

MLM demisexual/romantic truther. (He/him or he/they) I don't have many headcanons for the Savanaclaw trio <//3 if you see/make any please feel free to tag me!! I love reading I love information I love headcanons‼️

Ruggie Bucchi:

Either transmasc or the personification of the 'I'm probably nonbinary but I have a job so idrc about that rn'. I usually picture him with He/him or he/they. Perhaps a rare they/them if you so desire.

Pansexual, his only preference is hard workers on their grind 💪 Between you both you could create an empire of part-time jobs. I've also seen one or two poly headcanons with him that I enjoy. Dividing the bills between the whole polycule lads come on. We're eating good this week.

Octavinelle

Azul Ashengrotto:

I cannot lie, I don't have anything on this guy. There's nothing to be said yk. Like, he's just there in my head and there's not much else I can add. I tend to agree with the MLM headcanons. I also picture him as demisexual/romantic sometimes. Not always. He's the best in the school at remembering pronouns. He updates his secret file on you right away.

Gender wise, I always just enjoy whatever the fanartist/fic writer shows me. I default to he/him. Ursula was based on a drag queen! I think that there should be post-canon/book 3 Azul drag personas. Now I'm picturing a drag design. She/her/he/him for that.

Floyd Leech:

Asexual and panromantic. I think Floyd uses any pronouns, depending on his mood. I headcanon genderfluid, but he typically keeps near the masc end of the spectrum. Not always. The basketball club made colour-coordinated bracelets so that they can easily tell whenever Floyd's preferences have changed. Blue for he/him, pink for she/her, yellow for they/them. Open for combinations of those three, and no bracelets for when he has no preference :D

Jade Leech:

Asexual and gay. I headcanon that he always introduces himself with he/him pronouns, but at the same time I picture him being cool with any pronouns. In classic Jade fashion, he will be generally unnerving about your choice. Like 'Oh? Is that your choice? ...Fascinating :)'

Scarabia

Kalim Al-Asim:

I don't have many headcanons on him specifically, but he'll totally pay for your HRT. Like Trey, he and Jamil keep Scarabia stocked with menstrual products. Kalim has a LOT of siblings, so he's seen a lot of different kinds of people :D He's got a ton of older brother advice. I see him with he/him pronouns, and MLM.

Kalim is a very supportive friend. Always excited to learn new things about his you. Also, those parades he throws? I bet he's (Jamil's) organised an NRC pride event. If I had the skills and patience, I'd draw that idea. If anybody does, tag me o7 I wanna see.

Jamil Viper:

Jamil is a very well prepared man. As I mentioned above, he's the one that puts Kalim's plans into action. He keeps Scarabia stocked on everything, he's technically still an older brother, but I don't see him as having that dynamic with anyone other than his sister. He's still a supportive friend, though :D

I headcanon Jamil as bi, usually with he/him pronouns.

I once had a transfem au Jamil idea way back when I was 17, but I haven't given it much thought since. Maybe I'll bring the au back someday?

Pomefiore

Vil Schoenheit:

Vil has A LOT of headcanons, theories and interpretations in the fandom. Vil is canonically a very gender nonconforming character, using typically gender neutral pronouns, being comfortable in his gender identity and presentation, and is very open to wider interpretations of gender outside of what is stereotypically considered 'masculine' or 'feminine'.

Surprisingly, I've got no proper headcanons on a set gender identity for him. There's already so much canon info within the series, that I just haven't given it much thought. I think he defaults to he/him pronouns, but is perfectly comfortable with anything. Keeps Pomefiore stocked and educated, and he's very well taught in makeup that can make you appear feminine OR masculine.

Similarly, I don't really have any label-specific headcanons for his sexuality. I normally interpret him as MLM. Vil is one of the characters that I'm always interested to see discussions about. His views on gender identity are pretty refreshing to see in modern media.

Epel Felmier:

Epel my friend! Another character that I like reading interpretations of. Again, I always give him he/him pronouns. He also had a lot of canon information on his views of gender norms. His character arc is honestly one of my favourites.

I typically picture that he’s attracted to multiple genders. I’ve seen a lot of interpretations where he mistakes his attraction for jealousy. A lot of “do I want to date him or be him?”

Another au/headcanon I’ve seen a lot of is transmasc Epel. I know a lot of transmasc people see themselves in him. That’s awesome.

Rook Hunt:

This guy! I see him as pansexual but also on the aromantic spectrum. Hear me out. In his suitor suit he has one (1) singular line about not being ready for marriage yet. Like obviously, he’s eighteen, but it just made the projecting side of my brain whir. I now see him as the type to like the idea of romance, just not for himself. Doesn’t mean that I don’t like seeing art/ships that go against this, but that is a hc I hold dear now.

He/him pronouns, but this guy loves to discuss peoples gender identity and interpretations of gender. Sit down with him and a cup of tea, and he’ll listen and talk for hours about how you both feel. Be warned that he may take notes. Mirror pronouns Rook? Oh wait. I like that. Mirror. Like Snow White.

Ignihyde

Idia Shroud:

I typically see Idia as aroace with either little or no attraction. I like the headcanon that he doesn’t date at all, but I’ve also seen enough Silver x Idia to have another set of headcanons. I like both :D I’ve never seen him as not aroace though.

I do kind of wish I had his Suitor Suit sometimes. Every other line is something I’ve definitely said before. Like, the only time he shows any interest in dating is through video games and manga with characters that aren’t him. That’s so me irl you guys don’t understand. I would die happy if twst had canon aro/ace rep.

I think Idia’s the type to only use different pronouns online. Maybe with Ortho, too. He/they online and with close family. Everyone else knows him as he/him. I said that Cater might remember the nonbinary flag’s creation. Idia does. He was on twst tumblr to witness the creation of many flags.

Here's the aroace flag picked from the Suitor Suit card! :D Very pretty.

Ortho Shroud:

Ortho is downright fascinating to pick apart. Pre book 6, I doubt Idia programmed a sexuality into him. Like it would even be possible. Then post book 6, after he gains a soul/sentience, I think he and Idia would have had a talk about him now having the choice to one day explore his gender identity and orientation (if he so desires). I think Ortho wouldn’t have any interest in dating, though.

Confessional time. Before wiring this I had the random thought of “In second year Ortho downloads she/they.zip and gets a new body made”. I never meant to pay much kind to it but now I can’t let it go. Like I’ve been accidentally referring to Ortho as she in front of friends. I have a future design in mind. I have additional headcanons about this design. It’s completely taken over. If I ever post that redesign is beyond me but it’s there in my head and it won’t leave. Fem!Ortho future au. Idk if anyone would hear me out there.

Diasomnia

Malleus Draconia:

Another character I enjoy multiple interpretations of. One interpretation I have of him is cupiosexual/romantic. The other is demisexual/panromantic. Either way, the concept of a qpr would make him so excited that it doesn’t rain for days on Sage’s Island. The grass withered.

Malleus is old. Not mentally, but chronologically. He’s seen language change a couple of times, and he grew up with people even older than him. He was born in the mid 1800s equivalent. Thon is one letter off of thorn. See where I’m headed? The use of thon/thons was first recorded in the 1850’s. Gender neutrality is not a new concept to him.

If you asked for his pronouns, I feel like he wouldn’t immediately understand. Like, he calls himself I. Me. Sometimes if he’s with someone we. Did you want all of those too? Oh, just the ones you call him./j

Anyways twisted wokeland au where Malleus allows Yuu to make up a name and set of pronouns for him because he refused to introduce himself/j

Silver:

Another guy I never considered. Mayybe also on the aroace spectrum? I think he’d be happy in a qpr. I think he’s not the type to question it. He just goes with whatever he feels. I’ve not got much lol.

Sebek Zigvolt:

Demisexual/romantic and he/him pronouns. Again, I’ve not thought much on him. I think it takes him a long, long journey of self-discovery though.

Lilia Vanrouge:

Again, Lilia was born a LONG time ago. He was born in the early to mid 1300s equivalent. He’s seen so much change since then, and he’s been through a lot of character arcs. I think I’m justified in headcanoning him as an unlabelled king. If he likes a girl, awesome. He likes a guy? Cool. I think it’s common to hear him refer to himself in a dead language. Baby girl, he has heard pronouns you could not comprehend.

If you ask his gender or sexuality, you’ll get some vague dad gestures, and a ‘you know what I mean�� nod. You don’t. You won’t.

Book 7 spoilers, but I hope that they keep the mlm implications in for the en translations. They’ll probably pull a Cater and write out the canon bi implications though. Heartbroken.

⋆｡𖦹°‧★

Thank you for reading to the end of my ramblings o7 If anyone else makes pride themed posts please feel free to tag me!! I would love to see them!

I really like the subtle ways these things are portrayed in the story. Especially within the world building. We know that is generally societally acceptable for men to wear makeup and dresses in TWST, and there’s canon development of language changing over time in a gender neutral way! (Witches and wizards -> mages. Suck on that, Rowling.)

⋆｡𖦹°‧★

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@tixdixl @cyanide-latte @the-trinket-witch @thehollowwriter @elenauaurs

@emiensr

[tearwolfe]

Can you ramble about your headcanons? I like headcanons :3

these are mostly going to be ruikasa because i'll be honest. they're the ones i think about the most. if you couldn't tell...

tsukasa: -transkasa real.. -he's bisexual. makes it 2x funnier when i draw him saying he's not gay (it's true to me). -he's really strong, but he doesn't build muscle very visibly, so he looks slim/limber. not really a headcanon as of whenever the mr showtime live was, but he's stupidly flexible. -he has a mullet to Me. (i am projecting) -sharp canines... -his eyes are more red than orange. -he actually has a really good poker face. -adhd -he has a hard time falling asleep, but once he's out, he is OUT.

rui: -doesn't really confine himself with gender labels. or sexuality labels. but he'll call himself gay because it's funny. -you guys know but. chubby rui real. -i always slap that blue gradient on his hair so he's less ugly (thank you to my friend kade for drawing him like that first). -he can sleep pretty much anywhere if you let him. -paints his nails (i usually draw them black). -his hair is long enough to put in a short ponytail. -autistic -he gets along with saki very well. -he smiles when nervous.

ruikasa (together..): -rui likes to poke fun at tsukasa's quirks, but if he knows it's something he's genuinely self-conscious about, he won't say anything. -tsukasa will steal rui's clothes but then complain about his fashion choices. -they're both annoyingly clingy (tsukasa denies this). -tsukasa's the type of guy to go "hey rui we should practice kissing. for shows. in case we need to kiss for a role. not related to anything else." -tsukasa fell first, rui fell harder. -tsukasa starts to put a lot more effort into his lunches when he realizes that rui is always mooching off of him (true love).

ok here's some other, misc prsk headcanons. i don't think about the other characters As Much as these guys, but they still plague my brain.

gender/sexuality hc: -genderqueer ichika (haven't decided What so i'll leave it at that) -butch shiho -all of ln is lesbian -genderqueer or bigender haruka (i don't have a reason for this it just makes sense) -lesbian minori (pretty much canon) -all of vbs is gay -trans kohane -transmasc mafuyu -transfemme mizuki (this is pretty much canon, but some people prefer nb mizuki so i'll specify my interpretation) -bigender nene other headcanons: -shizuku is taller than tsukasa. i cannot stand the fact that she is canonically shorter than him i will not allow it. -chubby emu, honami, kohane. there might be more that i am forgetting. but that's my propaganda <3

[slowdrippingnoise]

I cannot stop thinking about Fords dream. Plan sexual? Is this aroace confirmation??

"Attracted to planning" my ass. What happened to attracted to strange and the strange was always attracted to him?? You are a weirdo, except it

I an aroace and i was concerned that Ford will be straight in TBOB but now i am just confused???

I see you want to scream about the book of bill. Please scream at me i need someone else in this madness

OK!!!! so this is an extremely interesting question, and my perception of it is very heavily influenced by this interview being fresh in my mind (you've probably already read/watched but if not go do that it's great) towards the end you can find alex answering a question about ford being interpreted as queer- and basically talking about how ford is written as extremely romantically/interpersonally repressed in general- I won't try to summarize it i genuinely recommend just going and reading that, he describes it all better than I could (and again maybe you already have idk)

I feel like the tbob dream note could be taken a number of ways (and, while I wouldn't actually ask it cause i feel like leaving it up to imagination is actually more interesting in a creative engagement kind of way, i'm desperate to know what hypothetical answers are hiding behind that "usually" oh ford) but the thing that sticks out to me is. i mean it's very difficult to read it as straight isn't it. ford has recurring dreams about being quizzed on "what he's attracted to" and consistently dodges the question (doesn't even give a straightforward answer like "nothing", he misdirects back onto his logical smartguy persona) it's definitely a nod to fans too, sure, but in-character it's no-way-out firmly establishing that his sexuality specifically is on the Grand List of Stanford Pines Insecurities. we definitely got a nod to this way back in j3 of course- the ford&fidds campout conversation- but this i think this new tidbit betrays a much more internal fixation/anxiety than "it's confusing to me and I don't really want to think about it for more that a minute at a time" (<-the vibe his j3 stuff had more of to me) TL;DR whatever he is, i do not think you can call this man canonically straight at all lmao. W

(ok i'm losing track of my own thoughts a bit here. i should've outlined this like an essay lmao. back on track-)

In terms of what I personally believe/headcanon? honestly i'm in a funny in-between place right now- if you asked me last week i'd just say "he's gay probably" but this has me Thinking now in a more "ok, what cooperates best with canon and how I personally view him" way and the "ford aroace" people are making some interesting points. my most recent idea of him that i've been rolling around in my mindscape like a shiny rock goes basically like this:

(putting this under a cut)(also this goes wildly off-topic for a while because i love talking about ford. i promise it is tangentially related and relevant to my argument)

ford is repressed in how he deals with people because people are confusing and often scary (history of bullying and ostracization, we all hc him as some kind of autistic, etc.), and this extends to how he views romance/sex- if you don't see yourself as safe/belonging among other humans it can be extremely difficult to imagine yourself in such intimate dynamics with them (accepted, loved) and ford is very well established to close himself off to keep himself safe. the prospect of "romance" is by default more unsettling than it could ever really be comforting to him (within his ability to imagine it, at least) outside of the rarer "what if i was just normal and nobody bothered me for existing" fantasy, which is its own can of worms,,

another part of this is my (more arbitrary/i know because im right forever/because i lived it) hc that the elder pines twins' parents didn't really love each other by the time they were raising stan and ford, it was more of a "we both pay the rent/keep the family going, we may not strictly like each other and yeah there's a screaming fight or two every few years, but divorce is off the table because it would leave us both financially up the creek, so you do what you gotta do" situation. which has the potential to do. things. to how you think about Traditional Ideas of Couples and Suchlike. take my word for it.

another important part, though i find myself getting technically off-topic for a ways here, my apologies- i've been thinking about ford's Patterns with his attachments, in that he generally has one Main Person to focus on and trust at a time, and for a most of his life these attachments end Badly- throughout his entire adolescence he has stanley as that person, they exist in constant contrast to each other, their own self-perceptions are defined by their existence as a duo, covering for each other's weaknesses (to the extent that they can ignore traits in themselves that "double up", so to speak- stanley is the dumb muscle and ford is the booksmart genius with potential- no way out of that)(their dad affects this too)(oof) he and stan have a really awful falling-out that leaves ford with the belief that his One Person was willing to sabotage his future, completely disregarding ford's own feelings or sense of security and agency, just to get his way. (strike 1.5? against ford's ability to trust people) --- in college he attached to his roommate, fiddleford- and they genuinely get along and compliment each other really well! they're besties for life! yippee! so ford has a Person again, to exist next to, to prop himself up. but their lives go in different directions- they both move on with their studies/careers, and ford winds up in gravity falls, alone, where he has trouble again interacting with the locals and spends all his time wandering the woods, with endless hours for introspection. --- enter- Bill! :) bill becomes ford's 3rd Person, and he flatters ford and manipulates him and validates him and offers him everything he could ever shallowly imagine would solve all his problems and patch up the gaping hole in his self-worth forever definitely (while reminding him of what he remembers/imagines of his brother most likely, ow) bill is also more "safe" than other people, he's an anomaly, a supernatural phenomenon, even, and he lives exclusively inside ford's head. he's a perfect, safe, obsession target. (billford situationship essay for another day)

until he's not, of course.

until his college bestie Person is back too, and he's more Real than bill in a way that's very comforting, but fidds is another strong influence, one for the better, and bill can't have that around, he has to go. after that his relationship with bill also turns sour extremely quickly in a terrifying way, which leaves ford shaken and unmoored and desperate, which leaves... stan.

which also falls apart. (strikes 2, 3 and 1.5-the-sequal in rapid succession)

the 30 years spent multiverse-hopping are interesting to me too in how they affected ford- i think being around so much "abnormality"/being disconnected from his own world's ideas of normal did a lot to mellow him out- but he still couldn't really stick around anywhere to form deeper bonds with anybody, he's a wanderer until bill is dead, which may well end up killing ford in the process, so...

then! he's back home! which is bad! (from his perspective) but gives him the opportunity to try to Attach to a 4th Person- dipper! this was a secret essay on why i think he's Like That about dipper all along not about romance at all haha trick'd'ya! (i'm joking)

anyway you get the idea- fortunately he has a slightly wider support net by the end of the show between stan, fiddleford, and the kids- but to me it's relevant in that ford has a very limited network of people who he is close to at all, considering that his view on romantic relationships seems to orbit around "don't wanna think about that/that's scary, I don't know/etc.", and that for a long time the relationships(platonic or otherwise) that he did have were defined by their ending in trauma, guilt, and shame. it makes sense to me for him to not really be able to figure himself out, how do you dissect all the layers of the bonds you do manage to form, tease out one strong emotion from another, especially when you're always afraid of ruining something because this is all you have?

I guess, given all that rambling, to me he lands within some combination of demi-aroace(attraction of any kind is rare and difficult to distinguish from other emotions, needs a strong base first) and too repressed and deeply, deeply traumatized to really say what comes naturally and what's his brain trying to protect him from being hurt. he knows that something is, by the standards of humanity, "wrong" with him, but it's just another note on a long list of "reasons normal people don't like him". and he's gay.

-----

ok i probably forgot some stuff but i think thats my thoughts on that lmao. anyway BOOK OF BILL this makes me. so crazy. hasnt left my brain for days. i will never be the same i called these shots i CALLED them. but i couldn't imagine. anyway-

while i'm still talking about ford, i love that this book let him be more emotionally vulnerable than j3 did, i feel like there was a harsher impression of ford among fans for a long time (at least, with people who weren't already Obsessed with him) because he has limited time in the actual show for his character to be established, and a lot of j3 either had him on the defensive, or still stuck in "everything ever is my fault" mode. getting a better view both of how bill manipulated him, and how he's still affected by it "postcanon" puts him way more in line with. how i've seen him all along basically!! augh. he's lonely and insecure and afraid and wants so, so badly to connect to people,, "the ego of a king. the insecurity of a circus freak." compare to "my immense self hatred vs my delusional god complex" we were so right.

his last section of the book is. so so perfect i'm so glad we have that- it wraps up what felt like a loose end with other pieces of canon leaving him on "i'm the biggest idiot in the world" which felt. bad. all things considered. but tbob lets him air out that soul-crushing shame in such a beautiful way- both in letting us the audience actually See how it was with him and bill before, and his family reassuring him that they love him and don't carry some massive sense of Blame for him being manipulated... it hurts good man. perfect place to end on. he's gonna be ok it'll be ok.

related- possession pages go crazy. like that is some "i've read fanfiction less fucked up than this" shit and I [the rest of this sentence redacted for my dignity] what was i saying. the dream scene was so viscerally upsetting. the "light switch". the stretching. (alex drop a link to your ao3 account. urgh) bill is so so so scary for that brief moment which is an amaaazing essential addition to the book that actually made me feel horrifically personally sorry for the little bastard for the first time maybe ever. i mean this so genuinely he's the worst he's been he's the saddest he's been it's a beautiful tapestry drawing me in. it's gonna occupy my brain for weeks. maybe months. he's desperate to hold on to ford he's desperate for his plans to work for once and he's pissed as hell but also now he has an excuse to cut loose- he doesn't have to hide his angry, shitty, abusive side from this little human that he's grown so attached to(who he sees himself in)- he can see ford and ford can see him (or, what he's willing to think of as "himself")(where did you all go-) and ford is just living a nightmare that he couldn't have possibly imagined. incredible

i'm practiced at being emo about ford i've been emo about ford since 2015 but the bill thing is new to me (not strictly the lore, i was around for the reddit AMAs/the axolotl poem, but the elaboration-) and it's killing me. he's so fucked. he's hopeless. he's fucked himself up so bad and refuses to get any better because just looking at it inside his head is too much. there's a loud buzzing in his ears and he blacks out for 30 seconds. everyone loved him he was the best baby ever. sixer, it would eat you alive. the doctor says three sips a day will make the visions go away. where did you all go. he's fine, he's fine, he's fine. it's all hitting me fresh like it's brand new, funy nightmare triangle abandonment issues go brrrr-

he wants ford to want him so bad he wants to not be alone so bad. hes awful he ruins every chance he gets and it's all genuinely his own fault. fuck (im not gonna talk about "pain is hilarious" im not gonna be cringe im not gonna do it) blacked-out list of exes love and fear are the same love cage you're my property if lost return to bill cipher covered in blood all alone in the universe-

I was gonna elaborate on those last scraps but. i am running out of brain. big week for ford enjoyers. big week for me being so so sad (/pos) ☀️

[twiixr4kidz]

I am probably the only person in the world to ask of this pair, but can I request some hc stuff of Todd Ingram and Young Neil? :D

absolutely!! i LOVE rare pairs so much

todd ingram x young neil hcs!!

they met on the set of the scott pilgrim movie, of course

neil cast todd as scott because he thought he was hot

he didn't really care that todd didn't notice him at first, but he was a little jealous when he found out wallace was spending a lot of time with him "running lines in his trailer"

and that was weird for neil because he usually didn't care about things like that

todd, on the other hand, had been very preoccupied when he FINALLY realized neil had been totally gawking at him

todd eventually decided to give it a rest with wallace because he clearly didn't want anything to do with him, so he set his sights on neil

since a certain vegan rockstar was still trying to "come to terms" with his sexuality, he'd ask neil about what he should do when he dates a dude

and neil just kinda looked at him with a perplexed expression that screamed "you literally do nothing different from when you date a chick"

most of their dates consist of going to the movies

neil's super used to listening to people practice music, seeing as how sex bob-omb used his and stephen's apartment for practice half the time, so neil doesn't mind going to clash at demonhead practices

he usually just sits there and plays zelda anyways

(establishing autistic!neil as canon in my universe) he rants to todd for hours at a time about his special interests, especially video games because they're like, neil's favorite thing ever

todd likes playing the video games neil recommends but he isn't that good at them so he has to ask how to find and how to do certain things (neil doesn't mind helping him at all)

they're both very spacey and they don't think through making decisions, which has led to some pretty interesting conclusions

"we don't have any food" "all the fast food places are closed" "what if we went scavenging like our ancestors" - a real conversation they had

they neglected to realize there were grocery stores and convenience stores that were still open right aroud the corner

[grrrasya]

My take on Andrew Kreiss

my take on Andrew!

disclaimer: everything stated here is not canon nor do i claim it to be. it's just my interpretation, so if you hate it or don't agree please just keep scrolling, thanks!

When Andrew arrives to the manor he is in his late 20s, around 28-29. He's also a German (maybe mixed) man.

Timeline: Andrew lost his mother at around 16-17, he survived by doing odd jobs, until he heard about Laz cemetery. There, he became obsessed with the idea of afterlife & heaven. He was ready to sacrifice everything to get there, until he crossed the line and had to leave. He moved to the manor, becoming one of the manor's staff.

Appearance + body: He is around 6'1". He's, obviously, albino. His hair is completely white, his skin is kind of a reddish-pink due to occasional exposure to sun, very rough on his hands, face, neck and other parts of his body that received repeated sunburns. He is covered in scars. He also has stretch marks, because of a sudden and intense grow spurt he went through as a teen, mainly on his back. His nose was hooked naturally, but due to lots of beating he received from being bullied, it's also kind of crooked. He has trouble breathing and usually breathes through mouth. Since he moved to the manor and had access to more food, he doesn't appear skinny, although still slim. He is physically strong due to extreme amounts of labor, but that also messed his health quite a bit. He struggles with neck, shoulder and back pains. He tries to take as little space as possible with his frame, so he hunches a lot. He covers his eye due to hypertrophy. His eyesight is terrible. I also hc him as autistic! Not sure if it is canon, tho.

Character: My most controversial take - Andrew is not religious. At least, not in a mainstream way. He has his own distorted view of religion, where he can lie, rob graves, and still go to heaven just because he had enough money to have his grave at the right place. All Andrew knows about faith is superstitious. He just wants a nice, normal life, normal conditions, not to survive but to live. That's what Heaven is to him, and that's why he craves it. Not because he is a God-fearing man.

He is careful around other people, he is a people pleaser for anyone who takes interest in him, although it's enough to say or do 1 wrong thing for Andrew to abandon the relationship completely. He hates when people try to ask something personal, when they try to bond with him in a meaningful way because it feels like a carefully laid trap. The saddest thing is - he is sentimental to his core. He wants to have intimacy with people (I'm not talking about sexual intimacy here), he wants to be close, but he can't. He is very quick to judge other people, and he kinda hates himself for it, because he is constantly judged too. But judging people only by superficial traits helped him survive as an orphaned teen, so he can't just abandon this habit. He is foul-mouthed, he doesn't seem to control it and is deep down embarrassed about the way he talks, when he talks at all. He thinks of science as something dirty, only crazy people participate in, because his only exposure to it was through grave robbery. He is greedy (at least that's what he thinks). When he got to manor, a place of abundance of food, free space (a room of his own!) and comfort, he felt guilty for constantly taking. He takes a lot, he takes too much, he needs to repay everything tenfold to be forgiven, to be permitted to stay a bit longer. He cleans in community rooms like library, he overworks himself, he tries so hard to be useful. He doesn't want to leave manor. Ever.

Some random hcs:

Although Andrew didn't finish even his basic school education, he is interested in learning and by staying in manor he learns a lot. Baking, gardening, reading and writing properly.

He enjoys literature, although he prefers when someone else reads to him, so he doesn't have to hurt his eyes.

Andrew enjoys being at the garden, and he enjoys spending time with Emma because she never asks him anything personal and always has interesting stories to tell.

[alj4890]

Your mission, if you choose to accept it! :)

I'm sending a GIF to everyone who has participated in Tobias Carrick Appreciation Week this year. Can you create a ficlet (or anything you desire) based on this by Sunday? If so, you'll get one extra chance at the prize to be selected on Monday! :)

Here is your GIF:

Okay. LOL! LOVE the above gif so much. Before I begin a whole new AU about this with my otp, here's a short background on my MC. Chris, is American born to Scottish parents and was raised mostly in Inverness. She has a temper, but usually just tells someone off. It would take a lot to get her this violent, like say someone not only manipulating her but also hooking up with a doctor she's fallen for. Going back to Book 2 and rewriting Canon and my own HC for this one.

Rated Mature for Sexual Content and Language. Chris's upbringing allowed me to find some unique Scottish insults that cried out to be used in this.

Masterlist

Game on

The Edenbrook/Mass Kenmore Softball Game

"Good luck out there, Chris." June said. "Remember to run Carrick's face in the dirt for taking that grant from us."

"Don't worry." Chris told her. "He won't be near as handsome when I'm done with him."

June slowly smiled in hearing that.

"Good. I can't wait to see him get knocked down a peg or two."

Taking a deep breath, Chris began to stretch. Shaking her arms out, she made her way to the pitcher's mound.

Of course, she thought, he would be first up to bat.

"You got this Chris!" Elijah shouted.

"Does she now?" Tobias taunted. "You sure you can do this, Valentine?"

Chris was tempted to stick her tongue out at him. The childish thought made her snicker. Tobias's stance eased when he saw her smile. His own lips curved at how cute she was in her uniform.

It was all the distraction Chris needed to throw the first strike. Shocked, Tobias tried to regroup. He narrowed his eyes at her as he tightened his grip on the bat. She winked at him, shaking his concentration, once more.

"Strike Two!" Elijah yelled out. "I don't know about you, Carrick, but I think she can do this."

Tobias rolled his eyes as he lifted his bat over his shoulder once more.

Chris eyed him, taking in how his uniform conformed to his body. A soft smile appeared on her lips as she thought how he might drive her crazy but he was very attractive.

He blinked at that secretive smile she had. After all the escalation between them with taking patients from one another, he never expected her to actually check him out.

"Strike three!" Elijah cackled. "Oh man. You didn't even bother to swing at that last pitch."

"Take it as a goodwill gesture." Tobias replied. "Next time, I won't go easy."

***************

Between innings...

Chris searched through the coolers of beer until she found a bottle of water.

"Keeping your head clear for the game, Valentine?"

She spun around at the sound of that teasing voice.

Tobias Carrick grinned at her as he reached past her for a bottle of water.

"Glad to see someone is taking this as serious as I do." He winked at her.

"You should wish I wasn't." She couldn't help but smile at him. "Then you might stand a chance to actually hit the ball."

He narrowed his eyes at her. Each time she pitched, he struck out. Though impressed, he wasn't about to admit defeat.

"I've still got a few points on that board." He reminded her. "And there will be even more before the night is over."

Chris stepped closer to him. "You wish that were true."

Tobias took another step closer. "You're going to eat those words."

"Doubtful." Her eyes flickered down his body. "I'm sure you win a lot of things, but tonight isn't going to be one of those nights."

"Want to bet?" He leaned down until his nose nearly touched hers.

His gaze settled on her mouth before locking eyes with hers.

"That all depends," she replied, "what's on the table?"

His lips quirked into a flirty smile. "I can think of one thing I'd like to see on the table."

Her eyebrows rose. The image of just what he'd do to her on that table made a flash of heat go through her body.

"I bet you do." She tilted her head. "I guess we'll just have to--"

"Get away from her!"

The startled pair turned towards a furious Ethan Ramsey.

He moved between them, glaring at Tobias.

"Leave her alone." Ethan bit out.

Tobias narrowed his eyes at him. "What's your deal, Ethan? We were only talking."

"Bullshit." Ethan hissed. "I know you. Chris is off limits."

"Excuse me?" Chris snapped.

"Doesn't sound like she is to me." Tobias winked at her over Ethan's shoulder.

Ethan grabbed hold of Tobias's jersey. "I mean it, Carrick. You've messed with me enough. Just because you poached our patient, doesn't mean you can also take her."

Before Tobias could snap back, Naveen forced them apart.

"Calm down." He ordered. "Take it out on the field."

Tobias snorted. Downing his water bottle, he made sure to knock his shoulder into Ethan's as he walked away.

Ethan grit his teeth, before turning to Chris.

"What did he say to you?" He demanded.

"Nothing but typical trash talk." She replied. "There was no need for you to get involved."

She straightened her shoulders. "I can handle myself. I don't need you jumping in to save me."

Ethan removed his ball cap and ran his hand through his hair. He knew he should have never agreed to play this asinine game.

"I know you can." He looked past her to where the Mass Kenmore team was sitting. "Seeing him try and get close to you, it made me..."

He cursed under his breath.

"So what if he tries to get close to me?" She looked away from Ethan. "It isn't like you want to be in that position."

"Damnit, Chris." Ethan whispered. "You know why I can't--"

"Save your breath." She muttered. "I've heard it all before."

"Wait." He grasped her arm when she tried to walk away. "Carrick isn't the type of man you can tease and not get burned."

Chris jerked her arm away.

"Don't worry." She glared at him. "I know all about being burned."

Ethan watched her storm off with a heavy heart.

******************

After the game, Chris was still full of restless energy. Their win over Mass Kenmore hadn't made her feel any better about the war they'd been having over patients.

When her friends invited her out to celebrate, she sent them on without her. The thought of another night spent in Donahue's with the same faces and conversations didn't appeal to her.

Trying to decide whether or not to just go back to her apartment, she heard her name called out.

She searched for the source and saw Tobias leaning against the side of his car.

"What?" She said once she made her way over.

"Congratulations." He said.

A reluctant smile peeped out at him.

"Thanks." She brushed a lock of hair that had escaped her ponytail behind her ear. "I didn't think you'd be up for saying that after I hit that last pitch of yours."

"It's just a game, Chris." He responded. "I wanted to win, but I still respect how you played it."

She folded her arms. "Something tells me you like to play a lot of games."

He smirked. "So many things in life are more fun when you make it a game. Why not enjoy it?"

"Is patient care a game to you?"

He rolled his eyes. "Come on, Chris. I'm not heartless. If I hadn't thought that Mass Kenmore could give Stephanie better care than Edenbrook, I wouldn't have offered it."

He leaned closer to her. "You would have done the same if the situation was reversed."

Chris hesitated. "You're right. I would have."

He smiled at her. "You and I are more alike than you think."

She laughed, shaking her head. "I wouldn't go that far."

"No?" He placed his hand upon his chin as if considering that. "I guess I'll have to work harder to prove it to you."

He pushed off from his car and opened the passenger door for her. "Want me to give you a ride home?"

Biting her lip, Chris shook her head. "I don't think I'm going home just yet."

"Where are you going?" He glanced around the nearly empty parking lot. "Looks like everyone else left to party without you."

She shrugged. "I'm not really in a celebratory mood."

"What kind of mood are you in?" He asked.

"Honestly, I'm not sure. I guess I'm more restless than anything else."

"Well, how about I drive you around until you decide what you want to do?" He offered.

"Okay."

She slid into his car. Her heart started picking up speed when she realized this would be the first time she was actually alone with him.

"Where were you going?" She asked once he buckled up.

"Home." He replied with a grin. "To drink my loss away."

She couldn't help but laugh. "I wouldn't mind a drink."

He turned towards her. "And just where would you like to have this drink?"

"I'm not really up for a bar." She admitted.

"My place or yours?" He asked.

"Who said anything about us drinking together?" She teased.

"Why waste this rare opportunity to do that very thing?" He countered.

"True." She relaxed back into the seat. "Let's go to your place."

Cutting her eyes towards him, she noticed his smug smile forming.

"Don't think anything other than a drink is going to happen." She warned.

"Whatever you say." He winked at her.

*****************

One drink and some flirting later, the two wound up in his shower. As the warm water fell upon them, they did all they could to heat the other's skin until they burned.

Chris ran her hands down his body as he kissed her neck. Her pent up frustrations with her life and work demanded she take advantage of her situation. She needed this release, almost as much as she wanted the man driving her on to give in to her every desire.

Ethan's words echoed in her mind, causing her to pause in her caresses.

The thing was, she wanted to burn. Even if it was just for this one night, she wanted to simply sate her passionate nature with no worries about what the morning would bring.

Tobias began to kiss down her body. He noticed her furrowed brow and lack of movement. He knew he needed to work on drawing her back into the night he was imagining.

He reached over and turned the water off, before urging her out.

"You're distracted." He said, handing her a towel. "Do you not want this?"

Chris paused in drying off. "No, I want you."

He stepped closer, all his usual cockiness nowhere in sight.

"Good. Because I've wanted you from the moment I first saw you."

"Right." Chris sarcastically replied. "I'm sure I really caught your eye at that diner."

He settled his arms around her waist.

"I noticed you immediately." He softly brushed his lips against hers. "Each time I saw you after that, I wanted you more and more."

His deep voice admitting to something like that, even though she doubted the sincerity, made her move right back into his embrace. Her lips sought his, and the two raced right back into the inferno they'd started.

Stumbling back into his bedroom, they fell upon the bed, limbs tangling as they continued to kiss.

Tobias moaned as Chris rolled on top of him. Deciding to relax and see what she'd do next, he urged her to take the reins.

His breath hitched the moment she kissed him. Her body moved over his, teasing and promising so much more. He cupped her face, looking into her eyes as she caressed him.

"You have no idea how often I've fantasized about this." He murmured, pulling her down for another kiss.

"Show me." She arched into his heated touch. "I want to do everything you thought about."

That was all he needed to hear.

*****************

As light began to filter through the slits of the bedroom blinds, Chris and Tobias collapsed exhausted on his bed.

Trying to catch her breath, Chris looked over at him. When he turned towards her, a breathless laugh popped out.

"You have some imagination there." She teased.

He chuckled, scooting closer to her. "That was only half of what I've fantasized."

"You're kidding?" Chris smiled at him. "I don't think I have the energy to see what else is in store."

She stretched, drawing his appreciative gaze towards her lithe body.

"There's always later." He reminded her. "Say like tonight?"

"Why Dr. Carrick," she snuggled closer within his arms. "Are you asking me out?"

"That depends." He pressed a lingering kiss to her lips.

"On?"

"If the answer is yes."

She laughed, shaking her head over how good she felt in this moment with him.

"That's a definite yes."

"Then I'm asking you out." He chuckled when she softly groaned.

"You're lucky you're cute." She teased.

"I know." He sighed. "It's both a curse and a blessing."

"You poor, poor man." She patted his cheek.

Tobias took her hand and pressed a kiss within her palm. His eyes found hers as she laced their fingers together.

"How about dinner first?"

"So, it's a real date?" She joked.

"Ummhmm." He rolled over on his back, tucking her in beside him. "Is that still a yes?"

"I will need energy to begin whatever round we're on." She replied.

"Yes, you will." He squeezed her close.

"Then, I guess I'll see you later."

She began to ease out of his bed, only to be dragged back within his arms.

"Where do you think you're going?" He murmured against her neck while dotting kisses along it.

"Home." She relaxed back within his arms.

"No need to rush off so soon." He urged her back under the covers.

"I'll stay if you let me sleep." She warned. "If I don't get a few hours, there's no way I'll be any fun later tonight."

"We can't have that." He laughed when she poked him in his ribs.

She curled up against his side. Her eyes closed and she felt her body relax completely. It'd been a while since she felt so blissfully carefree.

It was a feeling she didn't want to end.

******************

Weeks went by in blur. Chris seemed to find her stride in both her professional life and her personal life. That one night with Tobias had blossomed into a weekly date night, adding even more happiness.

She knew she was falling for him. It was difficult not to. He had the ability to get her mind off the possible shutdowns that loomed over their hospitals. His humor and unending charm kept her thoughts firmly in the moment instead of the fears of the future.

Plus the closeness that was developing between them made her care all the more.

She didn't know which she loved most, the amazing sex or the talks they would have afterwards. The nights spent with him ended up being the best part of her week.

Whatever it was, she wasn't going to question it.

The only problem was June Hirata.

Chris was still a bit uneasy around the diagnostician. Seeing how two-faced the woman could be made it hard to completely trust working with her.

Then one day June approached the team with an idea.

"Did you know Senator Ed Farruiga's at Mass Kenmore?"

"No." Chris replied.

"Apparently he has some illness that no one can figure out." She paused to make sure she had everyone's attention. "I think we should encourage him to come here."

Ethan leaned back in his chair in thought. Baz seemed a little uncertain about the idea.

"I would love to give it a go, but we can't just go take one of their patients." He argued.

"Why not? No one has to stay at a hospital where they aren't getting the best possible care. Can you imagine how much publicity we would get if we helped another famous face?" June glanced at Ethan. "It would help us be able to help more people who really need us."

"It would." He conceded. "And we are a better team than Carrick's."

"Are we really going to do what they did with Stephanie?" Chris asked.

"Don't you want some payback for that?" June countered. "We lost a huge grant! They don't need the Senator as much as we do."

Chris didn't like the idea of continuing the game they'd started with Leland Bloom, especially with how close she'd gotten to their opponent.

"Let's do it." Ethan decided, needing a chance to get back at Tobias.

As they worked out a plan of attack, June checked her messages.

"My contact says that Dr. Carrick and his team haven't diagnosed the cause yet. They have only begun the process of ordering lab work."

She looked at the clock. "Given how long it takes for Mass Kenmore's lab techs to come around for blood samples, I say we have an hour tops to poach him."

"Then let's get going." Ethan ordered.

******************

It took less than an hour to find the senator and to convince him to transfer to Edenbrook. As she followed Baz out of the hospital, Chris heard the one voice she wished to avoid.

"Chris?" Tobias called out. "What are you doing here?"

He noticed the senator further ahead of her, changed and in the process of signing discharge papers.

His eyes narrowed when he realized what was going on.

"Look, I--" Chris tried to apologize.

"Save it." He snapped. "I don't want to hear it."

Without giving her a chance, he stormed back the way he came.

***************

Later that night, Chris headed to a bar she knew Tobias liked to frequent. He'd already ignored her calls and texts. If she was ever going to have the chance to explain, she knew it'd have to be in person.

It didn't take long to find him in the crowd. What surprised her was who was sitting with him.

What is June doing here?

The way the two were laughing and talking, it was obvious they knew each other a little too well.

The more she observed, the angrier Chris became.

"Chris!" June greeted. "I didn't expect to see you here."

"Really?" Chris folded her arms. "I'm surprised. I thought you made certain to know where all your pawns are."

June laughed. "Only the most naive make the best pawns. You've been my favorite by far, Chris."

Tobias eyed her then glanced up at Chris.

June leaned closer to him, placing her hand on his thigh. "Our games are so much fun, aren't they?"

Chris was beyond livid. For months June had used her in every situation. Now to see that Tobias was in on whatever manipulative game they were playing caused her to snap.

She lunged forward almost punching June in her smug face. The table had stopped her momentum right before contact, giving Tobias a chance to grab her around the waist and pull her back.

Chris struggled against him. Her Scottish accent became thicker than usual as she unleashed a flurry of insults upon the pair.

"Let me go, you wee fuckbumper!" She shouted. "I'm going to show that dug licking pish aff a nettle just what happens when she messes with me!"

"Chris!" Tobias grunted when her elbows struck his ribs. "Calm the hell down!"

June began to laugh harder while watching the pair.

"This is the best you can do?" She taunted Chris. "Oh my god, I can't believe I actually thought you might be worthy competition."

"Bolt, ya mangled fud!" Chris yelled.

Still snickering, June gathered her things and headed towards the door.

"Call me Carrick when you're ready to be with a real woman again."

With a last burst of energy, Chris tried to break free of Tobias. She needed to knock June down just once. Her rage demanded to feel that woman's face under her fist.

Tobias yanked her back and half dragged her out the back door.

Once they were outside, he let her go.

They were both panting and glaring at one another.

"What the shit was that?!" He snapped. "If you'd actually touched June, she'd have had your ass in jail so fast it'd have made that hot head of yours spin."

"Do you know what that means?" He demanded when Chris remained defiant. "That means your career would be over!"

"Piss off." Chris hissed at him. "Ya lavvy-heided wankstain."

"Fuck this." Tobias rubbed his hands over his face. "I don't even know why I'm bothering to talk some sense into you."

"I don't either." Chris fought back tears.

"Why did you come here?" He asked when she fell silent. "Just to rub it in that you too can steal a patient?"

"Weren't you the man who said it was all a game?" She shot back. "And if I knew Edenbrook was the best for someone, then I should make it happen?"

"Damnit." He muttered. "Look, June told me you were determined to make me pay for my little stunt with Stephanie."

"That I was?" Chris released another profanity laden tirade.

The more descriptive she got, the more Tobias struggled with his laughter. He was still furious over everything, but he couldn't help but be impressed with her imaginative use of curse words.

After a particularly long sentence about June's reputation with men, all the fire seemed to go out in Chris.

She slumped back against the brick wall of the bar and lowered her head into her hands.

"I know you won't believe me." She began. "But this wasn't my idea."

Against his better judgement, Tobias moved a little closer and leaned next to her.

"What happened?" He asked.

The whole story poured out along with Chris's guilt.

"We never should have gotten close." She added at the end. "Not with all the animosity between the hospitals."

Tobias took a deep breath and slowly released it. "Do you regret it?"

"Stealing your patient?" She slowly nodded. "I don't think it was worth it."

"Not that." He turned towards her. "Us?"

She looked up at him. "No."

Her face scrunched as if she was about to cry. "I mean, I do since you and June had your own thing going at the same time. I know you and I weren't serious, but to have actually been with someone who could be with that two-faced bitch--"

"I wasn't seeing her while seeing you." Tobias interrupted.

She still looked doubtful.

"Come on, Chris." He rubbed the back of his neck. "You know. You have to have seen that what we have is..."

He cursed, kicking at some trash.

"What we have is what? She prodded.

He groaned then yanked her into a heady kiss.

She wrapped her arms around him, giving back as good as she got.

Tobias stumbled back from the passion in her kiss, hitting the wall with her locked in his arms.

When it came to an end, he lifted his head to look into her eyes.

"See?" He said softly.

She slowly nodded.

"Then don't say we shouldn't have gotten together." He cuddled her close.

"What about my part in the senator?" She looked up at him. "Can you let that go?"

"Yes." He tightened his arms around her. "Of course I can."

"Then why didn't you answer my calls?"

"Because June made it seem like you'd strung me along to keep me from suspecting anything when you did eventually steal a patient." He admitted. "Knowing that I'd fallen for you, it stung that you didn't feel the same way. That I was merely your pawn in all this."

"I hate her." Chris bit out.

Tobias snorted. "Yeah, she isn't the easiest person to be around."

Chris bit back the fact he'd found her easy enough to sleep with.

Tobias sighed. "Want me to take you home?"

"No." Chris mumbled. "I'm too keyed up to see my roommates."

A tender smile began to form as he recalled a similar conversation they'd once had.

"Want me to drive you around until you calm down?"

Chris looked up at him, recalling the night of the softball game. Seeing that he remembered it too made her melt against him.

"I'd love that."

Keeping one arm around her waist, Tobias led her to his car.