#i don't use these enough i just pick one for each character tbh

[chaoortu]

listen i know i yap a lot about nick and neurodiversity in my fics but it's like. every time i reread heartstopper it really jumps out at me and i'll probably reblog this again with more thoughts as i continue my reread but like.

it strikes me as interesting that despite the fact that nick gets called a chav pretty early on by tao, we never actually see nick acting that way on page. i think the show does a good job at showing how nick has sort of chameleoned himself and stuffed his real personality down but the show is a topic for a different post. in the webcomic we see it once when charlie is teasing him about being laddish and nick decides to act that way for a laugh. on one hand, i chalk this up to most of the early webcomic/heartstopper in general being in Charlie's pov. he wouldn't have noticed these things about Nick because they didn't really notice each other until their meet cute, which is realistic. I think it also speaks well to Charlie's character that he takes who Nick is at face value and challenges Tao's opinion of him. but what jumps out at me is that in harry's birthday party we sort of see the first instance of nick's "meaner" side and it's in the context of defending Charlie. Still! The first instance of this really sunshiney character taking quite a big turn!

But notice how the dig isn't personal? These are all observations about Harry that can be deduced in the context of the material before it. That is to say, despite being friends with Harry since he was like 11, Nick keeps it simple. It reminds me a lot of how you correct a dog's behavior in the moment and I can go on for ages about Nick and dogs but again-- that'll be another post. What follows this really intense moment is another really intense moment when he and Charlie are alone and like yeah, they're teenagers, being teenaged is intense enough. But after their kiss, we have this panel and my God is it one of my favs:

I really love how Nick is framed with flowers in this scene because it really feels like it's him blossoming into himself in this moment where it's just him and Charlie. Charlie is shown over and over again to be Nick's safe person in comic and while they are obviously falling in love way before this, I still feel like this is the moment where Nick decides it's safe to love Charlie (I mean duh, they kiss a LOT in this episode), or rather, to hand Charlie his emotions and feel like they won't be fucked with or used against him. And that's huge! Nick wears all his feelings on his sleeves, he's not even slick about it either-- the fact that Christian, Sai, and Otis pick up on the fact that Nick has a thing for Charlie before he does speaks a lot to the fact that Nick doesn't seem very aware of how much of himself he gives away on the regular. Which again, in juxtaposition with the fact that he's perceived as a judgmental rugby lad by Tao (which, grain of salt here. I love Tao a lot but he's also quite judgmental in his own ways so this is a pot and kettle situation), and the fact that his own mother comments on the fact that he's much more himself since befriending Charlie? That's MASSIVE. I dunno. I could be projecting here but as an autistic teenager who did everything in my power to be like my peers and lowkey hated myself for it, I find this incredibly relatable. We see Nick starting to realize that a lot of his friends are dicks several times before he and Charlie kiss for the first time, and that's also relatable. It took me so long and still takes me so long to realize that people I thought were friends are actually quite shit. Again, I could be projecting but it reads very neurodivergent to me that it takes Nick being exposed to someone who is actually kind to him (Charlie) to realize that his friends aren't kind people. Insane tbh! Something else that got me is that we see Nick struggle with the fact that he really likes Charlie and wants to stay with him vs. the responsibility he feels to regroup with his friends. I don't actually think it's responsibility. I read it as Nick putting his mask back on and resuming the expectations he's been bearing since before he met Charlie and it's a visible struggle for him.

Nick, while pretty unaware of the fact that he can be read like a book, is also incredibly aware of the role he plays in his own friend group and the ways in which he has to perform. But he doesn't like it now. His early love for Charlie really puts things in perspective for him that he doesn't have to accept where he's at currently if he's unhappy and we get that moment of regret where we see that he knows he fucked up by leaving Charlie.

It looks like he's disassociating here. That, or his mind is still in that room with Charlie. It's a battle of expectations vs. what Nick wants. And Nick's wants are never Nick's first priority. He's a pathological people pleaser after all. And despite the fact that he just fully made out with another boy despite barely having figured out that he likes guys and the ethics on Charlie kissing him without asking (teenage stuff, I'm not arguing about it rn especially because this doesn't bother Nick in canon. idk why this discourse exists but maybe i was just making out too much as a teenager) The next day, Nick clears the air. Literally runs to Charlie's in the rain so they can talk it out and so he can be understood properly. He's desperate to make things right with him because 1) he's in love and 2) he cares a lot about Charlie's feelings to the point of putting them above his own later in the story. But the way he does it and the way he sort of overexplains his feelings almost constantly really strike me as neurodivergent. Nick goes above and beyond explaining how he feels to make sure nothing can be misconstrued and that really gives me the sense that Nick is... somewhat aware of the fact that people assume how he feels? Granted, this is coming off the heels of everyone saying he was in love with Tara, so maybe he felt the need to explain himself more since some people think one pre-teen kiss = fairytale love. (ignore the fact that Nick's fairytale kiss with the flowers totally equaled fairytale levels of love for him, lol.)

He literally explodes! Charlie is physically taken aback by his words. This happens right after Charlie has his big "I shouldn't have kissed you this was all my fault" etc. explosion. Which! The fact that Charlie explains how he feels down to feeling at fault and sharing that with Nick, who is very much like no.. no nO WAIT. I LIKED IT. (so much that he kisses Charlie to get him to understand that pre-explosion). And again, we sort of see Nick trying to bottle and be a bit more normal about it immediately before when Charlie tells him he's getting mixed-signals. Nick's response was to unmix the signal and then cry about it because THIS. IS. A . LOT.

For a cis-male character who is involved in a very masculine sport, surrounded by masculine people who are not nearly as emotional as he is(on page at least) the fact that Nick goes above and beyond in this moment where he's so vulnerable to ensure Charlie understands him is hugely neurodivergent to me. He's making sure Charlie gets that Nick loves him, he's making sure he gets that he's not mad about the kiss, and he makes sure Charlie knows he feels bad for leaving him behind. His bases are covered! There's no room to make assumptions about how he feels and I imagine for Charlie, a chronic overthinker, the fact that Nick is so blunt about his feelings all the time must be fucking incredible. He can actually take Nick at face value (at least at this point in the story ). But especially after Ben's gaslighting shit? Like fuck! I'd want to jump into a relationship too if the guy I've been crushing on for like two months ran to me house in the rain, kissed me, cleared the air, and then cried in my arms. I love emotional honesty! It's also interesting to me that it seems like his confusion towards his sexuality bothers him a LOT more than his feelings for Charlie do. He likes being in love with Charlie, that much obvious, but it's this conflict within himself that bugs him. And idk, I could be projecting again but I just can't see a neurotypical teenager reacting like that. To me, it really reads as Nick going. "Okay, I like kissing Charlie and being around Charlie. I'm in love, this is good. Check." but then his sexuality is a huge gray area until he does more research on bisexuality and decides that's the label he wants to use and I think the not knowing is what really bothers him. There's a lot of pressure in queer spaces especially nowadays to be labeled and for Nick, a character who buried his personality to be accepted by others, to specifically be upset at being confused about his identity reads as neurodivergent to me. Nick, by all accounts, doesn't seem to really care about his sexuality except for the way it challenges who he believed himself to be up until this point and what that means to the people around him who think he's just some straight laddish dude, you know? Largely, he also seems rather apathetic towards sexuality and gender in general except when he has to confront his sexuality and how other people will perceive him if they knew what his sexuality is-- hence keeping things between him and Charlie a secret despite the fact that he's never ever been shown to be ashamed of the fact that he loves Charlie.

Anyway, this post got way too long. Enjoy one of my favorite OCD/AUDHD moments between Nick and Charlie. THEY LITERALLY KISSED LIKE TEN MINUTES BEFORE THIS MOMENT... INSANE BEHAVIOR... I love them. The sillies.

[palmastrings]

Solomon and Levi play Beat saber

For @ificouldbringyouback

@obeymeholidayexchange

The song used for this is called "Crazzee Boi". Feel free to listen to that

-------------------------------------------

Solomon, for the first time in a while, had finally gotten a day off this weekend that wasn't saturated in RAD homework or cleaning up the messes of his demonic or angelic neighbors. Usually, on days like this, he'd resign himself to some cooking, maybe some magical research or experiments, challenging Thirteen to a ‘friendly’ game over his life candle, or simply enjoying the weather, perhaps in the human world. Solomon laid back in bed, musing over the potential activities he could schedule for the day. What did it matter? He had all day to think about it, no need to rush. Solomon fumbled with his DDD, reaching out for it in the darkness of his room. 

It was only 7 am.

 Solomon smiled and tucked himself under his covers, safe from the colder air of his room, and gently placed his DDD back on his nightstand humming a song of sleep to himself.

No sooner had he done that, his DDD rang incessantly.

Solomon reached back for his device to be met with Leviathan's name and his hilariously assigned profile picture of his stressed face while losing a game of chess to Solomon – a game that Leviathan had challenged him to. Picking up the phone, he answered.

“Hello?”

“Solomon, hey! I'm kinda impressed you answered, tbh. You never really seemed like the morning-type to me. Uh, anyways, glad you picked up. You aren't busy today, right?”

Solomon thought for a moment. “You've actually caught me on one of my off days, so yeah, I can make some time. What is it you need?”

“Can you head over here in a few hours? I'll tell you why once you get here.”

 And with that, Levi hung up. Solomon wasn't sure why Levi would withhold the reason for requesting his company unless Levi felt like Solomon would disapprove in any other situation. He’d humor him, though. 

Solomon rubbed the sleep from his eyes and stretched. His body made a plethora of back-breaking sounds that any person would find very squeamish to hear. Ah, the consequences of old age. He started his shower cold, brushed out his white hair with less care than Asmo would approve of, and dressed in more casual clothes than he would normally find himself wearing on a busy day. By the time he cooked and served himself his signature breakfast of his secret ingredient red pancakes and aged, burn-to-a-crisp mini griffin eggs, the time had come for him to head out and meet Levi.

Oddly enough, he found Levi waiting for him at the main entrance of the House of Lamentation. Levi wore uncharacteristically athletic clothing with an anime-themed headband around his forehead, his bangs hiding whatever character was featured on it. Solomon kinda hoped he wasn't going to run some recreational marathon with Levi. His poor old man bones cant take it. He'd been spending a lot of time at his desk rather than in the great outdoors. Maybe the impending dread of what this could be is a sign for him to get back into shape. Ah, well, at least he’d last longer than Levi in a run.

Levi waved Solomon over. As Solomon approached, Levi handed him a device in each hand.

“I can't believe you made it! I was beginning to doubt you would really make the time to meet me, of all people, here on your day off. You truly are a real one, Solomon.”

“Ahaha, you flatter me, Leviathan, I really don't mind at all. But what am I doing here exactly?”

“Well, I'm so glad you asked, Solomon. I invited you here because one of the games I've been playing recently got a new DLC update, and in order to get all of the achievements, I needed another player.”

“Super, but, out of curiosity, why me?” Solomon asked. “I'm sure your brothers would be just as available to play with you.”

“That's why you're different. I called upon you, The Wise King Solomon, for your magical prowess and efficiency!” Levi exclaimed.

“As per usual,” he sighed. “So, what are we playing?”

Levi held up his PC that he had also brought out with him, featuring the title screen ‘Beat Slayer’.

“Isn't it supposed to be Beat Saber?” Solomon inquired.

“What?”

“Never mind.” It seems the Devildom has its own version of human games.

Levi spoke again, “Okay, so the rules are pretty simple. You're gonna hold two sabers in your hands. Music will play in the background while little demonic cubes with teeth fly at you following the rhythm of the music,”

“Wait, wha-”

“You also need to dodge the walls and avoid hitting the bombs. It's pretty self-explanatory. Oh, and you also gain bonus points if you imbue magic into your attacks when the beat drops. Got it? Great!” Levi then proceeded to hand Solomon some enchanted glasses, then ran over to his PC to set things up.

“Aren't there supposed to be VR headsets? What's with these glasses?”

Levi replied while still facing the laptop. “Uh, no? Those glasses are just for setting up the background. It's aesthetic. By the way, I'm putting this on extra hard mode so just be aware you might actually get hurt when doing this.”

“They're real?”

“On any other difficulty they would be illusions, but I need this achievement on the highest difficulty so the game actually summons creatures to fight, walls, etcetera.”

“That sounds like a liability concern.”

“It's Hell, nobody really does that here lol.”

With a shrug of his shoulders, Solomon slipped on the glasses as Levi prepared to start, equipped with his own sabers.

It was a magical sight to behold, which says a lot seeing how much Solomon had witnessed. The world glowed an ethereal purple hue, slowly beating to a non-rhythm. Beams of light danced aimlessly, without music to follow. Two yellow sabers illuminated in his hand like bars of gold. Mammon had probably used these before him. 

He knew he was still in the front yard of the House of Lamentation, but here, the world felt otherworldly, an open plane of soft light swimming across his field of vision.

“Ready?” Levi asked.

“Ready as I'll ever be for my first try.” Solomon smiled.

Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my love

The first cube came, and, as Levi foretold, came fast with a row of awaiting teeth. Solomon struck through it and followed a line of light so he could slash the second one and the few that came after it. Levi, beside him, moved in sync, their movements mimicking each other.

Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my heart So crazy boy

This didn't seem so terrible, Solomon noted. Not that the thought would last for long, as off in the distance, a barrage of attacks came hurling towards the both of them.

Mohm eh buhl tah oleui nun Guh ttam that fire Mah-eum jahkoo ttulyuh suh Geh sok olyuh higher Ee tah go boh yuh jool soo in nun b boi swag You think you got it but boy I got it like that

“Bonus points, Solomon, get ready!” Levi called. 

Solomon turned to face Levi. Levi stood there with his arms reeled back. His eyes under his glasses glowed orange, with an aura that Solomon could only recognize when Levi was feeling super intense. Looking back at Levi’s saber, Solomon noticed splashes of water appearing out of the air.

 ‘Right, Levi commands the sea, so it makes sense that most of his spells would be water-related’.

 Although that brought the drawback of Solomon's magic being slightly weaker near the presence of the ocean. He figured he’d be fine. Solomon readied himself, feeling the familiar spark of magic in the palms of his hands. He squeezed the handle of his sabers tightly. Finally, when the cubes came close enough, the two were in sync as they struck down. From his peripheral vision, Solomon could see a wave of water follow Levi’s swing, and it effortlessly carved the cube in twain. Solomon followed suit, a glimmer of silver light echoed in his slash. This was a lot more fun than he expected going into this. A side step to the left, and a wall sped by him. 

While most people would be content to brush Levi off for his deemed “childish” hobbies, there was real value in the games he played, whether that be the stories they tell, or the competitive fire that set ablaze in his bones. Something was always new when you visited Levi, it's a shame that Levi tended not to see these qualities in himself like others have.

Myuh ppun ee ruhn mahl hae yah dweh nun deh Turn it up, listen up (okay)

A bomb raced down the path, and the sorcerer only had a second to react and move out of the way. It just barely grazed his hair before it blew up a few feet behind him. The bombs were terribly sensitive. The flames of the explosion didn't touch him though. When he turned back, a wall of water created a barrier between the detonation and Solomon. While Solomon wasn't necessarily worried about the explosion to begin with – he always walks around with a protective spell on him for any and all occasions – he was grateful for Levi's quick reaction time. He turned to him, and they both gave each other a mutual nod of thanks. The music continued playing. Slash 1, 2, 3 cubes, sidestep the wall, avoid the 1, 2, 3 bombs. The lightshow around them beat brighter and faster with the music, and the aimless rays of light from earlier finally moved with purpose.

 Muhn chah boneh ji mah I'm sick and tired of you blowing up My jeonhwa cchok pal ee ji doh an hae Ee tah go boh yuh jool soo in nun play boi swag You think you got it no boy I got it like that

Solomon could feel the sweat gather around his neck. If Levi had told him he’d be so active, he wouldn't have worn a turtleneck. Levi, meanwhile, seemed great. As unathletic as he is, the desire to earn this achievement outclassed his need to stay confined to the comfort and safety of his room. He was actually quite elated to be able to do something like this with someone who seemed to match his own vigor at wanting to win this game. Levi called the dormant magic within him, it bubbled out and came crashing down in walls of water, decimating anything that came to him with a single, clean stroke. Likewise, Solomon put the strength of 1,000 years of sorcery into his own strikes.

As the song neared its end, they kept up the pressure; it became harder to keep up the pace. A cube almost bit a chunk out of Levi’s shoulder if Solomon had not stabbed it, and at this point, the explosions became a constant every few seconds as the music sped up faster. Until finally…

Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my love Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my heart So crazy boy Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my love Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my heart So crazy boy

Together, calling upon the final burst of magic they had, they struck the final cube right down the middle as it burst into sparks as it passed behind them. They both heaved for breath. Solomon wiped the sweat that had accumulated on his face, while Levi almost collapsed on the ground. Levi slipped off his glasses and made his way to his PC. He cheered gleefully at whatever was on his screen. Solomon could only assume it was his newest achievement. He found himself smiling with Levi too. For being a totally unplanned event, this day off ended up being an irreplaceable memory. The little things like this are what made Solomon's life truly worth living to its fullest. He wouldn't have it any other way.

[fategoflatass]

I used to be so against the slow burn trope. Not because I thought it was shit; it's just, I usually don't have the patience to wait whatever-amount-superior-to-three damn chapters for my dear ship to finally be able to look at each other without blushing and/or hold hands. Thus why you often times see me reading oneshots or fics with the "Established Relationship" tag on them.

So you can imagine just how surprised—or maybe not, maybe I just didn't think enough about it—I was when I realized my newest fixation's main pairing is—canonically—the embodiment of slow burn. Because holy shit they're taking their time.

Nothing against how Kusuriya develops its love story—quite the opposite, actually. The relationship between Jinshi and Maomao, two characters that are written as beautifully as their romance, is a rather realistic approach as to how the same or a similar dynamic would developed in real life. In such a complicated situation, with such complex feelings about emotions—both external and their own—and attachment, makes sense that it takes so long for the relationship to finally sail.

The problem is, I didn't know I was signing with the Devil the moment I decided to pick up the light novel. Ten volumes and nothing has happened. Nothing.

And you can say that technically things have happened, because they have. I mean, Jinshi is just so desperate for Maomao to give him the time of day, you know what I mean? And even that isn't enough anymore and thus he has committed some of the craziest shit I've seen in any romance. Which okay, I don't usually read these type of romances but still.

What I mean by "nothing" is just, their relationship hasn't changed status. I could also say that it seems to go nowhere, but that'd be lying. Since, you know, it has changed quite a lot—just not in the way my impatient ass wanted it to. Because he can be as honest with his feelings as he pleases, and those around them might be heavely conscious of the tension and thus constantly tease those lovebirds (as they should), but babygirl's not helping, you know?

And I get it, Maomao's not the best at expressing and understanding herself, and she's also way too busy worrying about going as unnoticed as possible (she should give up on that one already, tbh) while keeping her head where it should be. But like, I can't help feeling frustrated over it like ‼‼

GIRL, FUCK THE RULES. TAKE THAT PATHETIC EXCUSE OF A MAN AND RUNAWAY SOMEWHERE NO ONE WILL BE ABLE TO IDENTIFY YOU. YOU THEN CARRY THAT BITCH BRIDESTYLE TO THE CLOSEST CHURCH AND MAKE HIM YOUR WIFE. PROCEED TO FROG AROUND, EXPERIMENT WITH YOUR UTERUS AS MUCH AS YOU'D LIKE, AND THEN TEACH THE PRODUCTS OF YOUR PRACTICES AS YOUR OWN GUINEA PIG THE WAYS OF HERBAL MEDICINE. AS EASY AS THAT.

But she won't. She'll take her sweet ass time being in denial about both Jinshi's and her own feelings, then maybe she'll proceed to analize herself and find out that maybe, just maybe, that affection that she'd been feeling for that loser became something else. Did said affection also become something more complicated? Absolutely. Does she know how to deal with it? Hell no, but fuck it. If I learned something from school is that you always leave the hardest parts for later.

Now you see why I was so against reading slow burn?

And you wanna know the worst part? I loved it—I loved every second of it, every word, every page. Every scene that seemed to help the relationship advance, only for Maomao to say nope and leave like she owns the place, which at this point she fucking might.

It feels like I, as the reader, am in the middle of a heatwave and some sadistic bastard won't stop teasing me with ice cream—they put it in front of my face, close enough that I can smell the cold. Then take a spoon and eat little by little while staring directly to my eyes. At times they seem to show mercy and feed me a spoon, only for it to be a rather small quantity of serving—serving that tastes so damn good at first, only for it to have such a bitter aftertaste. But if I gotta have something in common with Jinshi is that I'll never be able to beat the masochist allegations, so I'll wait patiently for the next spoon and its corresponding and seemingly enless teasing from that faceless being.

So yeah, I'm still against it, only that now I understand the appeal—even if I have yet to find out about the whereabouts of my sanity while still mananing with the little I've left.

[caplanbuckybarnes]

Weekly Writing Challenge! #1

(February 19- March 2)

For a very long time i was debating on deleting this blog. Instead of deleting this blog and losing the friends/followers i have, i have decided ultimately to reserve this blog as a writing challenge prompt blog of sorts. I took a mini vote with a few followers and they were all in favor of this being a final decision.

With that being said! here's the first batch of weekly writing challenges that i wanna do!

I was thinking of hosting these every sunday (Haven't decided on a timeframe yet tbh.) Each writitng challemge will have5-10 prompts to chose. I was thinking of having themes for each week. This challgen isn't themed. but let me know what I should od in the comments?

Rules:

You don’t have to follow me!

ANY CHARACTER ANY FANDOM!

No underage smut (I shouldnt have to tell people this in today's world, but here we are lol)

Tag fics accordingly! 

If you decide to post your fics elsewhere, PLEASE inform me.

I will be putting these challenges (And others that i host) right here on this masterlist)

No due dates!

all of these prompts are up for grabs! they will not be crossed off if they are picked!

I don't need to be informed of what fandom or pairing. Just let me know when your fic is posted!!!

use the tags #caplansweeklywritingchallenge

Each challenge will have 5-10 prompts and they will all be completely randomized. (Some will be taken from previous writing challenges that i hosted prior to this, sue me)

And without further ado, the prompts are below the cut!

“I bought them for someone.”

"Freedom is just a concept, isn't it?"

"Why can't you remember me?" "What did I do?"

“I made a batch of cookies, but I made too many for just one person.”

"You're enough for me."

“when we were together, I had a book of all the pictures we’d taken. remember how we used to take at least one photograph on each date?”

"... What else am I supposed to do?"

"Holding you like this is where i'm happiest."

"I have loved you since we were kids."

“You don’t get to leave and then come back after all this time and expect me to welcome you with open arms.”

[shmowder]

Your blog is making me want to replay Patho 2 again... I did play once on the intended difficulty, and then I replayed it afterwards on the easiest settings, doing everything and saving everyone and I'm ngl, that was some of the most fun I've ever had even though it wasn't quite in the spirit of the game haha

The so-called spirit of the game is this senior citizen wirh an overgrown 2000s anime boy haircut who shakes his cane at you sassily when you choose to only swallow a handful of razors as opposed to the razor muckbang the game offers.

I finished the game on the hardest difficulty

This was my first time playing the game ever. I straight up went to the intended difficulty, saved everyone, did everything, and never starved for a single day. I had 20+ Shmowders by the end. I was fully stocked on meat, I was fully stocked on homemade antibiotics and maxed the hospital shift each day.

All of that with only 3 Deaths

WHERE IS MY FUCKING CELEBRATION HUH? WHERE IS MY MEDAL? NO ONE THEW ME A PARTY, NO ONE INVITED BELLA HADID >:( MARK WASN'T IMPRESSED.

Fuck you Mark! ONE OF THOSE DEATHS WAS BULLSHIT YOU DUMB SLUT. YOU SPAWNED A GUY ON TOP OF ME WHILE I WAS PICKING UP HERBS, HOW THE FUCK DID HE ONE SHOT ME WITH FULL HEALTH HUH? YOU WHORE.

What I'm saying is. Look, we both finished the game on complete opposite extremes, yet we're both here. In a pathologic x reader blog on tumblr. We both had fun and shared a good understanding of the plot and characters. That's what matters. Everything else is just people patting themselves on the shoulder. You're the only one who will be impressed with the fact you beat the game flawlessly, and you're the only one who will be bothered by the fact you picked an easier difficulty

Because it's really not that different. To me, I have the kind of autism that makes games like pathologic smoother than water for me, I thrived on the ruthlessness of dark soul and did a no death run in darkest dungeon. But also. I absolutely suck at casual games, I can't play Stardew Valley unless I'm fully cheating, I can't for the life of me beat a single platforming game because I have a slow reaction speed.

Play Pathologic however you want! Ice-pick Joe isn't gonna pop from under your bed at 3am to beat you up with hammers. This is coming from the most tryhard difficulty elitism person there is in games.

Buttttt. I do recommend giving Pathologic classic HD a try. I promise anyone who beat Pathologic 2 on ANY difficultly will cuck tf out of the first game. There is no thirst! The vendors have unlimited money, and you can sell all of your trash to them! THE ECONOMY IS THRIVING I BOUGHT FOOD ON THE DAYS THE PRICES WERE SKYROCKETING BC I COULD AFFORD IT. I would've never financially recovered from buying food in P2 on any day that's not the first one. In P1, I rarely slept because I was deepthroating lemons and snorting coffee beans day and night since I could easily afford the health/hunger penalty.

Meanwhile, in P2, I'd save coffee beans to sell to get enough money to save up for army clothes.

The combat is so forgiving, the houses with good loot aren't the infected ones like in P2 but the burned ones! The AI in that game is so stupid you can trick plague clouds into disappearing if you stand still! You can glitch and jump over fences to take shortcuts through the town! YOU CAN SCAM THAT CUNT ANDREY STAMATIN FOR ENDLESS SHOTGUNS.

Lastly don't forget that 90% of the Pathologic fandom haven't even played any of the games at all. 70% probably never watched a single playthrough either and just video essays instead.

In the steam version of Pathologic 2, Only 10% of players who bought the game have ever reached the end.

10% !!! That's us there! Me and You! It doesn't matter how what matters is that we both did it while 90% of people gave up.

And the situation in the classic game is even more dire tbh-

Only 6% ever opened the game and made it through the first day. Only 3% ever made it to the last day.

So, really good on you for finishing the game! Good on me for finishing the game! WE DID IT! YAY! Someone really should give Bella Hadid a call.

Also, please do yourself a favour and ignore whatever the video essayist says about the difficulty of the games. They're good storytellers for building an interesting narrative to watch, but they're not good at videogames assessment. Each of their reasons is very personalised by their own experience and doesn't necessarily mean other people will struggle with the same issues. Don't listen to anyone who tells you picking an easy difficulty ruins the game either, Pathologic doesn't relay on its brutal gameplay to shine, it can more stand on its own as a narrative story walking game. If anything, it would probably shine better on easier difficulties when you have time to dig for context clues and plot without starvation breathing down your neck. I missed some flavour text quests because I was too stressed about balancing different objectives to do them or pay attention when something important was said.

[anotherobeymeblog]

Which of the characters are the loudest in bed? 👀

I had to rewrite some of these parts three times because tumblr kept not saving the draft when I clicked "save draft" so forgive me if some of them sound a little clipped, I'm pretty annoyed about it lol

Loud

Mammon: Yeah, Mammon has absolutely no concept of volume control. Naturally, he's wildly embarrassed by this and will try to deny how loud he is even in between moans. It's pretty fun to tease him about this. It almost makes it worth all the times someone will bang on the door demanding you keep it down. Almost.

Diavolo: Idk what you expected. He sees no reason to try to hide what you're doing, so he doesn't bother keeping his voice down. And, tbh, I'm not convinced he could be quiet if he tried. This man has a big, booming voice and even his dirty talk sounds more like shouting. Barbatos isn't paid enough for this shit.

Solomon: Whore 💖 He's absolutely shameless, so you better hope no one else is in the same building as you when you fuck. Of course, if you ask him to try to be quiet, he'll happily make even more obnoxiously obscene noises just to annoy you.

Moderate

Leviathan: Levi will bite his lip raw to try to stifle his noises if you don't stop him. He's actually pretty quiet as far as like... decibels go, but his tone is so shrill, his voice carries much farther than it would otherwise. He sounds absolutely pathetic, and if you call him out for this, he will cry, but he will also cum on the spot.

Asmodeus: Okay, I know this is a hot take, but considering his vast uh. Experience, there's no way Asmo doesn't know how to adjust his volume for the situation. Much like everything else related to sex with Asmo, YMMV because he will try to shape himself into your ideal partner. However, if you do manage to get him to loosen up and stop trying to impress you, he naturally makes these clipped, high-pitched whines that are super cute, but not that loud.

Belphegor: So sex with Belphie can really be divided into two categories. Sometimes, it's slow, lazy sex where he's still half asleep and adorably clingy. In these cases, he's almost silent, with the only noises he's making being little sighs and incoherent mumbling that you think might be your name. But on the other hand, when he's in a particularly bratty mood and wants you to wreck his shit, it's a totally different story, and he will be spitting taunts at you even as the words keep getting cut off by choked moans.

Simeon: Simeon is prone to crying during sex and everyone else can fight me. He tries to maintain some semblance of dignity at first, but it never takes long before he falls apart and starts crying out freely.

Quiet

Lucifer: Yeah, the most you're getting from him is the occasional tremor in his voice. He's bad at showing vulnerability at the best of times, so you just have to get used to picking up on the way his mouth twists or his brow furrows, because you won't be getting any more obvious reactions than that. (Unless he's drunk, but that's another story altogether.)

Satan: Depending on his mood, the sounds he makes range from low growls to soft, breathy moans. Either way, it's gonna be pretty quiet, and you'd need to be within a couple feet of him to be able to hear them at all.

Beelzebub: If you're doing something particularly intense, you may be treated to some choked grunts, but otherwise, the only noises he really makes are his breath getting heavier and whispered praises that grow increasingly incoherent as he approaches his orgasm, at which point he seems to stop breathing altogether.

Barbatos: Barbatos makes these drawn-out, airy noises that are very cute, but almost inaudible if your faces aren't right up against each other. If you make it known that you want to hear him better, he won't get any louder, but instead will lean towards you to moan right in your ear.

[jjs-brainrot]

Are there any yuri manga/anime that you would recommend to a new fan of the genre? Everyone swears by Utena but I don't think I have the mental fortitude for a show like that yet.

Sure thing!

Bloom Into You by Nio Nakatani

(manga and anime)

It's the classic newcomer entry point but there's a reason it's still as highly lauded as it is: It is just that good. It's got excellent drama, the main two characters have a really great and intriguing dynamic between them and it much more openly acknowledge the queerness of it's characters then a lot of yuri before it did. A lot of the more recent yuri mangakas regard it as a major inspiration, and the anime getting as big as it did tends to be seen as one of the major factors in the yuri boom we've been experiencing the last 4 years or so.

Both the anime and manga for it are excellent, though the anime only covers the first couple of volumes (which unfortunately is something I can say about about most stuff on this list as yuri anime tend to not get more then a single cour...)

Whisper Me a Love Song by Eku Takeshima

(manga and anime (not recommended))

Had to get at least one band yuri on the list. Unfortunately, the recent anime for Whisper Me a Love Song kind of turned into a trash fire. Which sucks as the manga itself is quite excellent. Early chapters are very cute and sweet and the later chapters have some very spicy drama.

I really can't recommend the anime for this one so it's a manga only recommendation outside of maybe checking out a playlist of the songs from the anime when they appear in the manga.

How Do We Relationship? by Tamifull

(manga only atm)

Hands down one of the best examinations/dissection of what it means to be in a relationship from any romance series I've ever read. Every character feels like they're written as people with their own likes/dislikes and feelings towards romance and sex instead of romance character archetypes. it genuinely feels like you're watching people navigate their differences to make a relationship work rather than a "these two were made for each other" style romance series.

That being said, this is probably the hardest to read series on this list as it can absolutely get way too real at times and also does not shy away from talking about heavier subject such as homophobia, trauma, etc.

School Zone Girls by Ningiyau

(manga only atm)

This is basically a Nichijou/Daily Lives of High School Boys style slapstick comedy but full blown yuri. If you're a fan of stupid x stupid, this is the series for you as there are so many morons (affectionate) in love with each other here.

Unfortunately, the manga is currently on indefinite hiatus while the mangaka works on other projects which is the main downside of this one but it's still def worth checking out.

I'm in Love with the Villainess by Inori

(light novel(audiobook version also available), manga and anime)

Otome game villainess isekai romcom that is very gay while also being extremely frank when it comes to discussing queerness, bigotry and uneven wealth/power distribution. It's a series that that ardently refuses to use subtext at every turn which is quite respectable given how many yuri tend to dance around discussing queerness outside of "they're in love". It's not perfect and does have its flaws (enough to get labelled as "problematic" by the usual ingrates) but its strengths easily elevate it to one best yuri series from last couple of years.

The anime and manga are both excellent (with both the JP and EN dubs of the anime being fantastic) but they are pretty behind compared to the light novels (anime only goes up to the first chapter of the second book and the manga is roughly 70% through the second book). The light novels are genuinely excellent reads so if you get caught up on the other two, I'd def recommend picking up the LNs.

Superwomen in Love! Honey Trap and Rapid Rabbit by sometime

(manga only atm)

What if Kamen Rider but yuri?... That's basically it on my sale tbh. It's an extremely gay yuri tokusatsu. It's genuinely a crime that it has not gotten an anime or an actual live action tokusatsu...

[the-s1lly-corner]

Proxies with a fem reader going to a pumpkin patch so she can pick out her pumpkin? :>

Proxies and Fem!Reader going to a pumpkin patch!

obligatory toby is platonic but tbh i dont think romance ties too much into these specific hcs also i havent been to a pumpkin patch in years so im really scraping my brain trying to remeber what people do asides pick pumpkins...and google... a lot of google... i admit i had to fight myself not to make this a group thing where it's all together but im 80% sure you wanted these separate no unique gifs for each character, too eepy (its 6am rn and i couldnt sleep for the life of me SOBS)

Masky:

I feel like out of the three he's probably going to give the most resistance, he just doesn't like being around where loads of people may be; too much noise you know? But with enough coaxing and reassurance I do believe you can convince him to tag along

Most straight forward about it, wants it to be in and out, so he kinda beelines and tries to find a pair of pumpkins that'll do

"Babe... those ones are too small to carve..." "They're. Average."

Sorry I had to make that joke

Anyways

Out of all the activities there you might get him to sit down for a hayride if it's not too too packed!

Overall it's an okay experience, but really this guy would prefer the pumpkin carving at home after the fact; out on a porch sitting next to one another, alone in comfortable silence! He saves the seeds to make into snacks later

Hoodie:

A little more willing to go out! I feel like he's the easiest in terms of talking into stuff! As long as it's not anything dangerous he's more than willing to spend time with you.... all the better to keep his eye on you.. both in a cute aww he wants to protect you way and a creepy way but hey that's creepypasta for you

If they're offering shitty quickly constructed rides count him in, he's going to be the one dragging you!

While I'm not sure what rides would be there I'm sure there'd be but you're gonna be there for way longer than originally planned

Saving this for another day but Ferris Wheel trope where it gets stuck, one of y'all totally shouldn't send in a character for me to do that for wink wink nudge nudge

Probably the most emotive you see Hoodie, ever, it's actually a little jarring at first but it's cute in it's own way that he's getting all hyped up over some rides

overall? y'all forget to actually. pick pumpkins so you guys have to almost immediately return to go browse at the pumpkins that remain. Does the thing where you knock on produce to make sure it sounds right. Does he know what he's going or what he's looking for? No clue but hey there's that mental image, Hoodie kneeling down on the ground, head pressed against a pumpkin and tapping it

Ticci Toby:

Pretends to not wanna go but really he's totally fucking stoked that you wanna go somewhere with him, him? like him him? Toby? Well if you insist-

That bit sounded mean but I believe Toby feels.... I don't know how to put it but like I think it's because he used to be bullied and left out that he still gets a little surprised when you willingly invite him to hang out; not that he's complaining though

Haunted corn maze. This fucker beelines for the corn maze. You have lost your silly friend with an affinity for collecting empty snail shells (hc)

Good luck trying to find him, if it's one of those mazes with scare actors he's not going to flinch or scream so there goes your audio cue

Eventually you do find him though! So it's not totally disastrous! It just takes you upwards of fifteen minutes because you yourself got lost before looping back to the entrance, only to find this little shit sitting right by the entrance

Seriously how the fuck did he do that?

No clue

You know how sometimes pumpkins are bumpy or a lil... off looking? Leave it to this fucker to make several jokes about how they look, primarily ragging on the bumpier ones

"Hey look, it looks like you" "shut the fuck up"/j

Generally a very good time as long as you ignore the small heart attack you got when Toby disappeared! Good luck cleaning the mess after carving up your pumpkins

He probably tries to see what the guts taste like

idk what raw pumpkin guts taste like

not sure if its any good because ive only tried pre canned pumpkin puree and used it for baking so idk if it tastes good straight from the source

[moonlightcanyon]

sits down. I love analyzing and dissecting media and characters I like and this is a post for just that. it's several rambles in one

(spoilers for inanimate insanity / ii18. mostly talking about knife and suitcase)

'I can't protect you anymore' 'I never needed your protection' but she did. there was a time suitcase couldn't stand up for herself, where she didn't know how to defend herself, and knife showed her how. or at the very least, he gave her tips on how to do it, and was there for her in a way nobody else was. (really, what knife calls 'protection' is more like 'guidance' in a lot of cases. but that's a tangent for another time because I could genuinely spend hours talking about knife)

the first moment that comes to mind is suitcase immediately folding when trophy yells at her, but it comes up in most of her interactions with nickel and baseball prior to the conversation on the dock between her and knife. if you only know how to be one thing (the 'pushover' thing in this case), you do need someone to show you how to be something else sometimes. and knife was the guy, because he very much knows how to handle himself and, ultimately, doesn't want others to deal with the same stuff he's used to

I think about the scene where lightbulb stuck the invisibow on suitcase very often, and how it was knife who took it off her and broke it. he didn't know about the hallucinations yet, but he's seen the way she's gotten upset, knows how she sounds when she is, and fast, deep breaths usually aren't a good thing in general. while it was triggered by something, it's still one of the worst moments suitcase has in relation to hallucinations/seeing things that aren't there. despite her being more than capable of handling herself, in the moment I sincerely doubt her ability to have gotten out of that one without outside help

on top of that knife's seen the 'floating bowties' before and so it checks out that he has a good idea of why it's unsettling, plus the fact that in the exact same scene, knife also reacts to the thing- first with shock, then glancing off, and finally glancing around a bit. his realizing 'oh. it's not just me who saw.' is pretty huge and is one of the few times we see knife displaying some semblance of guilt. tbh I think he was genuinely considering admitting to seeing taco before the invisibow was put on suitcase and the energy in the group shifted; his 'no more distractions' after breaking it is also partially to himself. don't focus on what's in the past, it's already done. moving forward is all you can do.

there's definitely some element of protecting/guiding when it isn't needed, sure, but suitcase did need it before she grew into her own. and on knife's end, that's how he shows he cares. he protects because it ensures safety and consistency, two things which are very important to him

knife guides suitcase and helps her become able to stand up for herself and still remain the kind-hearted, empathetic person that she is. suitcase, in turn, teaches knife that it's okay for him to not have his walls up 24/7 and that he can afford to be genuine with others and still retain his "kill or be killed" worldview

seeing knife and suitcase talk to each other is so. raugh.

knife can cut deep into others verbally but I don't think he ever does with suitcase unless the circumstances are dire, and even then he holds back; he could go for the throat but he never does with her (primarily thinking of ep7, where he tells her to mind her own business but says nothing else, then has an interaction with balloon shortly after where he gives a comment so scathing balloon literally deflates over it). suitcase responds well to his blunt way of speaking because it's very 'this is what's up', but it still allows her room to add input and she knows he'll listen. she also knows him well enough to pick out what he's really saying, not what others think he's saying.

suitcase on the other hand grows to be able to not only take what knife dishes out but throw it right back at him without any fear of losing him/the bond they have for doing so, and she's also not afraid of him attempting to hurt her either. she says a lot of words and knife listens to every single one she says, because he recognizes that each word she says is important to her and thus it's important to him; suitcase knows this in turn despite it never being stated aloud. she's the only one who doesn't lie once in ep15, and she sticks to what she wants to say regardless of how it might affect others

I think the only time they both REALLY fling hard-hitting insults at each other/have a serious argument is at the end of ep17… which is something they're doing to stall for time, and to make it seem genuine they literally have to, otherwise the whole plan falls apart. they both know it's an act, though, and thus they know that neither of them would say those things to the other normally. ironically that probably was really healthy for them both to do bc they're getting it out to the intended recipient in a way that won't come back to bite either of them, and I don't know where to even BEGIN with regard to just how much trust you'd have to have with someone to AGREE to hit each other where it hurts

[punching the wall] the extent to which suitcase just shatters the lines of what she was made to be. multiple times over.

the first thing is suitcase's voice starting to drop in pitch. the second is her standing up for herself and what she believes in. what matters. and it goes on from there- she starts speaking her mind, making her own choices, taking control of her life. she sticks to her guns even after finding out everything's fake because it's real to her no matter what anyone else says.

her not leaving any time for questions and taking charge for everyone else's lives? coming up with the plan to kill cobs and mouthing 'don't move' at the others who go to get the egg back? telling everyone that they're not helpless? it's in the name of kindness, and doing what's right, and facing the core issue, and a bunch of other things

this one was meant to be typed out to a friend first but eh, I can stick it here. another scene I think about is the very end, where suitcase starts hallucinating and knife reaches out to comfort/help her

and his hand goes right through her

and yet that's enough to pull her out of it.

I've seen it described elsewhere as knife waving at her to calm her down and like, okay, but I really don't think that's what it is. this is partially due to the whole possession thing the ghosts can do and the fact that they, like- still have a presence? in ep11 I think, bow goes to hug marshmallow and while part of her body phases through marshmallow, her arms/hands don't. this is probably due to the limitations at the time, or it might've just looked confusing to viewers if the arms looked randomly cut off. point is that bow's arms don't go through marshmallow

knife is very new to being a ghost. he figures out throwing stuff pretty easily, but he doesn't seem to have 'holding' things down yet, meanwhile bow and dough are both seen with a cell phone and a tape recorder respectively. they may just be 'holding' those items in the correct spot but they still Do It. and I mean- you'd have to have enough of a presence in order to do that, right

the show is FULL of micro-expressions. you can go back to just about any scene and replay it several times, and you'll likely catch a new micro-expression on someone's face that you missed before. if knife was unable to do anything to help suitcase, I'm pretty sure the directors and writers would've made the decision to cut back to him and show knife's horror upon realizing that this part of suitcase's life is also her own too. that he's helpless to do anything but watch as she struggles to and eventually pulls herself out of it

but he isn't. he occupies enough presence that even his hand phasing through her briefly can help her. her resulting smile is a sad one, I think, but one that's still full of gratitude

knife is, in fact, still here. suitcase is, too. it's different than what it was, but it's okay.

[violetsiren90]

All I Haven't Said | Namjoon/Reader

Table of Contents: Chapter 1; Chapter 2; Chapter 3 (part 1), Chapter 3 (part 2)

Pairing: idol!Namjoon/f!Reader

Genre: Soulmate AU; idol AU; chapter fic; strangers to lovers; a bit of idiots to lovers, tbh; slow burn; eventual romance; eventual smut; angst (life is messy & hearts are complex); OT7 featured

Summary: You found your soulmate - or rather, he found you. Turns out he's an idol of much acclaim who needs you for very real and unglamorous reasons. What could become of two hearts so used to giving of themselves when they are confronted with needing each other?

Warnings: 18+ (minors, dni), realistic depictions of cancer and cancer treatment; mention of unfeatured character death (previous to plot); emotional health growth and development; eventual smut; feelings and dealing with feelings (no, but seriously, so many feelings)

Author's Note: First and foremost - Blame Me chapter 1 will still be tentatively dropping by the end of the week. However, this just literally wrote itself last night after a couple of drinks and several streams of Lonely 💔. It was the thing that just poured out of me and could not be stopped. It's been simmering in the back of my brain for a while, and so, now that it's out here, I'm going to be posting it in tandem with Blame Me, probably on alternate weeks (if I can manage it, 😅). I want to give credit to those whose works I have read which have come to set the stage for my concept of the soulmate au, and who are far my betters in creative artistry: Matchy, author of balls-to-the-walls masterpiece Trip No Further, Fallencairns, author of lovely work of art Turbulence, and @teenagebountyhunter , to whom I dedicate this work 💜 the author of the ineffably beautiful Namjoon soulmate fic Bloom (RUN to read this immediately) - the inspiration for what is to humbly follow below. If you're checking this out, thanks a million for reading, and please don't be shy in offering feedback should you be so inclined! (Baby fic writer here, constructive criticism always welcome!)

Without further ado, chapter one is under the cut.

P.S. Tag list is open. If you want in, let me know. 😊

P.P.S. In case no one has told you today, you're loved and worthy of love. 🧜💜

“When your hands leap towards mine, love, what do they bring me in flight? Why did they stop at my lips, so suddenly, why do I know them, as if once before, I have touched them, as if, before being, they traveled my forehead, my waist?”

~ Pablo Neruda

Chapter 1: The Cure

Diana dipped another three fries in ketchup and popped them into her mouth.

"So, what do you need to talk about that has you desperate enough to buy me lunch?" She smiled smugly and sipped and her milkshake.

You hadn't touched the burger in front of you, even if you probably should be absolutely relishing in it, considering your future prospects. You picked up a sweet potato fry and stared at it absently.

"I found my soulmate," you stated flatly.

Diana's jaw dropped mid-chew, unpleasantly framing the masticated remains of a mouthful of turkey club.

"Wait, are you serious?" she pressed, round hazel eyes wide and unblinking.

You dipped the fry down into the little cup of ranch and swirled it around slowly.

"Actually, he found me. Well, his people found me," you continued. 

"Huh? So is he some kind of a big deal - wait...they found you? What does that even mean? Wait, no - you have a soulmate?!"

You smiled ruefully. It was kind of nice to see someone else freaking out about it for a change. You had known your little sister would react strongly, which is why you had waited until now give her the news.

"Y/n, ANSWERS," Diana demanded leaning forward to flick your forehead. 

"Ow!" you protested, rubbing the throbbing spot on your brow. "Keep your pants on, geez!"

You sighed. After having relayed this story to your mom, your doctor, a specialist, legal advisory, your best friend, your brother and his wife, and your very disappointed boss, you had gotten pretty good telling it. Yet, somehow, each time the burden of it's truth felt a little heavier. You ate the fry. It was pretty good. You wished it had sucked so it wouldn't be one more edible thing you missed the prospect of.

"So apparently, a couple of years ago a university in Switzerland found a way to match soulmates using DNA testing. Don't ask me about the exact science of it - I do not understand it. What I do know is that it's illegal to use this technology to locate your soulmate in the US."

"Why?" Diana had abandoned her food and was listening with rapt attention.

"Something about privacy rights. Though they've dealt with that issue in Switzerland - people interested in finding their soulmates join a biological registry. I'm sure our government is just waiting to find a way that big pharma can exploit it before they facilitate the process. Anyway, somehow, I ended up in a foreign registry. I guess there is a black market for soulmate data..."

"Oh my god, could I be on the black market?" Diana gasped, slapping her hands over her mouth.

"I guess anyone could, provided they've ever been treated at a hospital, or given blood, or anything of the sort...but calm down! It doesn't even matter unless you have a match, which is rare."

"So he found you on the black market?! That's so fucking sketchy, Y/n."

"It was his company, actually. I got a visit from representatives of an organization called Hybe. They are some kind of South Korean entertainment conglomerate. One of their employees, a musician, is dying of cancer. Seeing if he had a soulmate was a last-ditch effort to save his life. Now everything is banking on me and my cooperation."

You flicked your eyes up to your sister. Her expression had morphed into something far more somber.

"Heavy..." she whispered.

You nodded.

"What are you gonna do?"

You took a bite of your burger. She wasn't going to like your answer. Diana's face changed again, this time registering alarm and indignation.

"No," she murmured, "No, Y/n. You're just gonna do it, aren't you? You're gonna go be the fucking hero! You're going to traipse off to Korea and save his sketchy, ungrateful ass!"

She stood up, her chair screeching back over the concrete and drawing the attention of other diners on the patio. You glanced around apologetically.

"Diana, sit down! And how do you know if he's grateful or not?!" you hissed.

"No!" she countered defiantly, yanking her hand away from where you had reached for it. "You always do this! You never, ever think of yourself. And now you'll be gone forever...is this even safe?"

Tears had started to well up in her eyes, and the glances around you had turned into stares and whispers. You stood up and pulled her into a hug.

"Hey, hey, it's okay! Lets get out of here and I can answer all of your questions, alright?"

She sniffled.

"Okay. But you're not leaving me."

You smiled and huffed out a laugh pulling her toward the parking lot.

You had anticipated that Diana would disapprove of your decision, and it being as difficult a situation as it was, you had decided to make all the arrangements and choices necessary before telling her. She loved you so fiercely, she would have watched the world burn before letting you break a nail, if she could help it.

After your father's death nearly twenty years ago, you had become protector and provider to Diana and your younger brother Henry, three years her senior, in ways your sensitive and unworldly mother seemed unequipped to shoulder. If they had both not been so established and secure in the trajectory of their adult lives, you would have made it clear to Hybe that you regrettably had nonnegotiable responsibilities right where you were. But Henry was settled into a suburb with a lovely wife and year-old daughter, Diana was set to finish undergrad and head off to nursing school, and the deal with Hybe had actually allowed you to leverage for your Mom's retirement, so you were boarding a flight to Korea next week to take on a new set of cares and concerns.

You tossed your keys on the table on your way into your apartment and collapsed onto your comfy red couch. While Diana rooted around your fridge and loudly complained about the lack of hard seltzer, you sorted through the mail and made a mental note to add a forwarding address on a few of your accounts and subscriptions, including the one supplying you with Nightwing comics. You set the mail aside and took a moment to look around you.

You loved your little apartment. The kitchen was small, but the big window with the spider plant hanging in it made it one of your favorite rooms - the herb garden on the counter and the fully stocked bar above the fridge did nothing to make you like it any less. The earthy brown walls of the living space were littered with shelves full of candles and living plants and quirky curios, and in and amongst them hung framed watercolors of flowers and herbs that you had painted yourself. The record player sat at the ready in the corner by the wall dedicated almost exclusively to books and vinyl. There was a small tv over the stone-lined fireplace. Over your shoulder your soft, queen sized bed with sheer canopy cozily called your named from the single bedroom. 

The whole place smelled like citrus and cinnamon. In every corner, there was you. It was going to be hard to leave the hobbit hole you had so lovingly curated for yourself over the last half-a-decade...especially since you wouldn't be going "there and back again", but just...there.

Diana plopped down next to you,  breaking your reverie.

"So, you're NOT going, but tell me about the huge mistake you ALMOST made," Diana prompted as she side-eyed you, taking a sip of the wine she had poured herself.

You set the comic book you had been thumbing through aside and drew your knees up to your chest as you swiveled to face her impatient stare.

"Last week, these three people showed up at my door, two men and a woman, and they said they were from a company called Hybe based in South Korea. One of their employees, a singer named Kim Namjoon, has stage 4 liver cancer. I guess they caught it pretty late in the game, so even the most aggressive treatments aren't doing much good. Back in April the doctor gave him two months to live."

"Damn," Diana interjected softly.

"Yeah, that's why all of this is happening so fast. He needs me as soon as I can get there."

"We need you, too," she whispered, reaching out to loop her finger into the top of your sock. You smiled affectionately.

"I know, Di, but you're a grown woman now and you can take care of yourself. You're going to have to and I know you can. Life really won't be that different - you'll be off to school in San Diego anyway! Most of our hangouts were going to be over Facetime...now you'll just have an excuse for a little international travel."

She heaved a stuttering sigh.

"Speaking of travel...Johnny broke up with me," she mumbled.

Your mouth hung open in shock.

"Oh my god, Di, I'm so sorry! Why didn't you tell me?"

She downed her remaining wine and stared into the empty glass, twirling it between her fingers.

"I was gonna, but when I told mom last week she said to wait to talk to you about it because you were dealing with something stressful. Now I know what she meant."

You shook your head.

"Ugh, Mom..."

Your sweet, nonconfrontational mother, while you loved her deeply, was a horrible communicator. Whenever she got involved things like this always ended up worse. You looked at your sister twiddling with her wine glass. She looked so small. And Diana, while she exuded many things, very rarely seemed diminutive. You grabbed her and pulled her to you, and she instantly snuggled into your chest.

"I'm sorry you've had to hold that in all this time," You said softly, stroking her hair, "You really could have told me. How are you doing? Was it bad?"

She shook her head against you.

"Nah, it wasn't so bad. He's going to travel before starting grad school and wants to 'sow some wild oats'," she answered, flashing air quotes.

You couldn't see her face, but the acerbic nature of her tone told you just exactly what she thought of that concept. You snickered. Atta' girl. You'd never liked that guy much, anyway.

"What an asshole," you remarked.

"Yeah, he better not hit me up in a couple of months when he's done fucking his way through Europe."

"Fuuuuuck that," you commiserated. 

"Yeah, so I thought this summer would be our last hurrah. You know, no guys, just you and me...like old times" Diana mumbled in a voice that was all sulking and bottom lip. 

"Ahhh," you said with a smile, "So that's why you are so disappointed. Well, we still have a few days - we can make the most of them!"

Diana lifted her head from your chest and glared up at you.

"Boys ruin everything!" She whined.

You smirked softly.

"Usually I would agree with you, but the one I'm leaving for seems kind of decent, actually."

Diana frowned.

"How do you know? Did he call you or something? Wait, you never finished telling me your story!"

You hummed in assent.

"I mean, there's not much more to tell. I agreed to move out there to bond with him and begin treatment. I signed a really basic contract that will be revised when he is well enough to think about the future - or in a year, whichever comes first. They were pretty quick to meet my terms, I guess they didn't really have much choice since I was the one holding the all the cards."

"What does any of that have to do with him being a good guy?"

"Oh," you blinked, "It doesn't. You see, when they met with me they talked a lot about him. It was almost like a job interview or something. They talked about his accomplishments, his net worth, the importance of his work, and his worthiness as a person. One of the guys was actually one of his bandmates, and he had come specifically as a character reference. They had initially wanted me to sign the contract right there and then - and let me tell you, that kid they brought with them almost convinced me with his giant puppy eyes alone - but in the end I had asked for forty-eight hours to consult legal advisory and think it over. The first thing I did when they left was look him up. You actually probably already know who he is - I think I might have been the only person in the world who didn't. Have you ever heard of BTS?"

Diana jumped back like she'd been stung, clutching her chest.

"Are you about to tell me that your soulmate is a member of the biggest band in the world?" she whispered, her eyes impossibly wide.

You smirked. 

"Not just a member, Di...their leader." Diana shrieked, leaping up off the couch.

"RM??? Your soulmate is RM???" 

Your sister stared at you, agape, while you threw your hands up in indignation.

"I was the only person!"

"Oh my god..." Diana staggered back, demeanor having deviated sharply from disapproval to elation, "My roommate is obsessed with them! She has all these posters - but her favorite, I'm sorry, her bias, is Suga...holy shit, I can't WAIT to tell her she's gonna-"

"Diana," you interrupted her firmly, and her eyes shot up to you.

"Yeah?"

"You can't tell anyone."

Her face fell as she leaned back against the wall beside the fireplace. Clearly this was going to be even more of an emotional roller-coaster for her than it was for you, you thought in amusement. Typical.

"Everyone who I tell has to sign a gag order. You included."

Diana slid down the wall into a slump and knocked her head back.

"This situation keeps harshing my vibes, dude," she whined.

"Well, I'm exceedingly sorry about your vibes, but I'm sure they'll recover," you rejoined sardonically.

"But woah, Y/n, your boyfriend is hot. And rich. And super famous. Your wedding is going to be fucking LIT..." 

"Woah, Nellie!" You cut her off, waving your hands as if you usher her train of thought into the landing strip of sanity.  "Slow. Down. Wedding?? What happened to 'sketchy, ungrateful ass'?! He is NOT my boyfriend. He's supposedly my soulmate. According to some Swiss pseudoscience. We haven't even bonded yet. And if we do in fact bond, that doesn't mean we're a couple."

Diana popped her head up and fixed you with the most incredulous of stares.

"Um, excuse me...soulmates have to touch each other to survive. And I heard that the soulmate connection is better than sex. You're telling me you have the opportunity, nay, the duty, to be up in the business of one of the sexiest men alive, and you're just gonna platonically kick it for the next seventy years?"

You rolled your eyes.

"I mean, if that's what he wants - if that's what I want. Soulmates doesn't automatically equate lovers. I've been reading about people's experiences and there are some soulmates who bond platonically. Some people are already with romantic partners when they meet. Some don't share a sexual orientation that makes them compatible as lovers..."

"Oh my god, Y/n, could you please not kill the sexy by going all nerd on this?" She asked you in exasperation as her finger swiped at her phone screen.

Suddenly she shoved the phone out toward you, while tapping frantically with a neon yellow acrylic nail on the image she had summoned. She was saying something humorous and complaintive but you weren't listening. You were looking at the man in the photo.

You hadn't seen this one in your superficial search-engine dives. It was a headshot. His hair was a light brown, full at the top and styled away from his face. His skin was darker than in many of the other images you had seen, emanating a beautiful golden glow. He was smiling just enough for his right dimple to softly grace his cheek. His features were strong, masculine, and incredibly handsome. All of that was already striking, but his eyes, oh, his eyes - they were staring directly at the camera, irises only half visible under his lidded gaze, warm and sincere, so incredibly intense.

The hair stood up on the back of your neck and your breath caught in your chest in spite of you. You closed your eyes and sucked in a breath. You needed to calm down. He was just a person. Good looking? Yes. Charismatic? Obviously. But you had a job to do, and no time to screw around with schoolgirl daydreams. He probably had a girlfriend. No, definitely, he definitely had one. And hey, he was just a person, like you. No need to be star struck.

Diana had been continuing her rant, completely unaware of being ignored, when she had let out a high pitched squeal of laughter.

"Oh my god...oh my god!" She shrieked.

"What?" You snapped, your hormone-wrestling train of thought cut off abruptly.

She stared at you, lips pressed together as if she was trying to contain more loud giggles.

"What??" You demanded impatiently, your limit for her antics very swiftly approaching.

"RM. K-pop superstar, probably one of the coolest people ever born, gets YOUR dorky ass as a soulmate, HAH!"

"Hey!" you deflated, unimpressed with what she considered to be so vastly comical.

"Oh that poor man!" she pushed dramatically, "That poor, poor man. You're the least graceful, geekiest person in the western hemisphere. What will you even talk about? Good thing you don't speak Korean, you'd probably bore him to death! Shit, at least you're pretty..."

You folded your arms over your chest defensively.

"Hilarious. But actually, he's fluent in English. And I read somewhere that he likes art..."

"Y/n, he's rich," she interrupted condescendingly, "All rich people like art. It's a huge flex to own an original. If I was a billionaire I'd 'like art' too. Oh my god, I just can't believe this is happening. Like he's crazy famous..."

"And very, very sick," you reminded her softly.

Her expression fell into something contrite.

"Oh, shit, I forgot," she murmured.

"I'm glad you're excited for me, Di. It really made me feel a lot better about the whole situation seeing you get some kind of joy out of it. But I can't stress enough that this isn't a fairytale. Who knows how he feels about resorting to this. I guarantee you this is as hard for him as it is for me."

Diana crossed over to the couch and skooched in next to you.

"All jokes aside, he's lucky to have you, Y/n. You love at a thousand percent. Even if you guys just end up being soul-buddies, or whatever, he hit the jackpot," she smiled at you, that sweet smile that made you rethink everything for one split second.

Now it was your turn to try to hold back tears.

"I'm gonna miss you," she murmured, "But I respect what you're doing."

"Now that he's famous?" You prodded with a teasing smile.

"Yeah, now that he's famous," she conceded. 

You pulled her into a hug. The silence that hung around you was pregnant but comfortable. Diana finally broke it with a soft question.

"So you're really going to give your whole life away for a total stranger next week?" she whispered.

"Mmhm," you hummed somberly into her hair.

"Why you always gotta be like Dad?"

A familiar lump began to form in your throat, but you swallowed it back. You always did. And Diana fell asleep in your lap one last time. You stroked her hair as you thought back, rather emotionally exhausted, over your conversation. It seemed like people thought of the soulmate connection as some kind of miracle. You didn't believe in those. People made choices, and those choices governed reality. You had just made the biggest choice of your life, and if it was like any of the other roads you had taken, it would require much of you. 

The following day was your last at work. Your coworkers had greeted you with pizza, cake, flowers, and hugs. It was touching to realize how much you would be missed. Your boss, Shauna, hovered as you gathered you belongings from your desk. 

"Damn it to hell, I'm gonna miss you!" She mourned for the umpteenth time.

You smiled as you tucked your little philodendron into the box, placing it next to the canvas speckled with daisies that read "You Matter" in curly green letters. 

"You have an amazing team here, you guys will do great," you insisted, patting her hand where she leaned on your desk.

"Um, a great team of people you trained!" she said, consoling herself with a swipe of frosting from what had once been a beautiful red velvet cake with white buttercream.

You leaned beside her on the desk, joining her in sadly picking at the dessert remains.

After you had graduated with your degree in social work, you had landed an internship in a program which Shauna was running. The two of you quickly discovered you had similar passions and community goals, and the following year had left the program to start Magnolia Village, a one-stop shop for women's services sadly unprecedented in your area. While the startup had been rough, your passionate duo had believed in the need and refused to say die, and from your mutual blood, sweat, and tears had blossomed a cornerstone of the local community. Over the years it had grown and extended its reach to thousands in need of support. Many of the staff were women who had first come through the door seeking services, and were now your partners in providing the aid they had found empowering in their hour of need.

You were immensely proud of what the two of you had built, but leaving the Village was bittersweet, as you were more confident than ever that it had grown into a well-oiled machine powered by lovely, capable people who could keep it going at full tilt without you.

"This place basically built itself, we just propped up the scaffolding," you remarked, glancing around the building fondly - what had once been a residential fixer-upper was now a cozy space of offices, a nurse's station, six emergency beds, sanitation services, and a food pantry

"Bitch, you know very well that I am the bulldozer and you are the heart and soul of this place. We are going to feel it when you leave. You better come back and visit us. Mirabell is going to do a good job filling your shoes, though. Watching her step up to the plate has been something else." 

"It has," you nodded, "She's going to kick ass. You might just forget I was ever here by the end of next week."

Shauna turned uncharacteristically tearful eyes toward you.

"I will never forget you," she choked.

Then suddenly you were being crushed in a bear hug. You returned her embrace until you thought you might actually pass out from lack of oxygen.

"Okay, I love you, but I'm about to asphyxiate!" you wheezed, slapping her on the shoulder.

She let you go, but grabbed your arm and looked at you seriously.

"I want you to promise me one thing," she said, holding your gaze.

You cocked your head to the side. Shauna released your arm to clasp both your hands in hers.

"I want you to promise me that when you get to Korea, you find something that you're gonna do for yourself."

You started to respond but she stopped you.

"Something for yourself. It doesn't matter what it is, but it can't be for your soulmate, or your family, or anyone else however deserving...just you, okay?"

You looked at her quizzically.

"I do stuff for me..." 

"Don't get swallowed up, baby girl. Find someone to ground you, to remind you that you're worth more than what you have to offer."

You scoffed.

"I'd like to see someone try and swallow me..."

"Y/n,"

"What?"

"Promise me."

"Okay," you nodded, "I promise."

Shauna squeezed your hands, then went back to chipping away at the mass of red crumbs and buttercream.

A little twinge of worry twisted in the pit of your stomach. You were strong. Resilient. No one could bounce back like you, could survive like you. People knew this - they had been telling you so since you were ten years old. So why was everyone acting like you were being cast out to sea without a life preserver? 

You had spent the weekend with your family. Henry and Mercedes had even driven down, Elena in tow, to have one last Sunday dinner and see you off to the airport. Hugs and tears and small parting gifts had made leaving even harder than you had imagined.

When you finally boarded the plane your eyes were red and your head was throbbing. After the plane had gained enough altitude to allow you to unfasten your seat-belt, you had slipped into the restroom to rinse your face. You returned, plopping down next to the man who would accompany you during your first few days of transition.

"I'm getting booze when they wheel it by, Matt, so don't try to stop me," you huffed, gesticulating in mild threat with the book you had extracted from your carry-on at the suited figure sitting in the window seat.

The handsome older gentleman smiled, not lifting his eyes from the copy of the Korean Herald in his hands.

"Wouldn't dream of it," he responded, flipping a large, thin page.

Matt Anders had been many things to you in life. Before you were born, he had been your father's best friend. He had been the best man at your parent's wedding. He and his wife, Rebecca, had cared for you and your siblings during your mother's sanitarium stay. He had tutored you for the SAT score that had earned you a full ride to the university that had saddled you with a BS in social work and minor in English literature. Today, he was your attorney. Matt, who had an IQ of 146, had learned basic Korean so that he could translate for you and make sure that your interests were looked after as you settled in. Having him there made you feel one hundred percent more secure about the process. He, for instance, had been the one in negotiations to ask for the very cush business-class fight accommodations you were new settling into.

"Whatever you would do for him, you'll do for her. I want an equality of treatment clause added with no addendums."

You smiled to yourself as you remembered his exchange with the Hybe's representation. He had asked for things you would have never asked for yourself, and you felt better having access to them knowing that he felt you were deserving.

The flight attendant sweetly asked if you would require any refreshments. You asked for two whiskey and cokes, and handed one over to the man beside you. You took a long, refreshing sip.

"Damn it, I wish I had appreciated food more," you sighed, looking ruefully at your glass.

"What are you going to miss the most?" Matt asked before sampling his own beverage.

"Cheese. I can't believe I'm saying that, but in the end I just love cheese. And there are so many kinds I haven't tried. Do you know there's this Italian cheese that comes in the shape of a pear? It's super expensive because of the breed of cow the milk is sourced from. It's supposedly suuuuper creamy. But, hey, now I'll never know if it's as rich and complex as they say..."

You took another sip of your drink.

"Caciocavallo Podolico," Matt remarked casually, returning to his newspaper.

"Excuse me?"

"The cheese you described, it's called Caciocavallo Podolico," he reiterated.

"You know, I should be used to it now, but I'm not. Don't think I'll ever be. How on earth do you know this stuff?" you insisted incredulously.

"Read it once," he shrugged, "And it's actually pretty famous as far as cheeses go."

"Catch-a-vayo Picadillo..." you murmured.

"No," Matt interjected succinctly. "Anything you want to go over again? We have the time, Lord knows."

You sighed.

"Can't think of anything right now. What did you think of the list of questions I sent you?" 

"Very good," he nodded, "I'll be adding a few of my own, that I think should come from me, if you don't mind."

You swirled the ice in your plastic cup.

"Of course not. Thanks again for coming with me, I'd be pretty lost without you."

Matt smiled at you again, reaching over to squeeze your arm.

"You'd do just fine. But you would be flying coach."

You smirked and cracked open your book. As you flipped to your marked page, a colorful, sturdy rectangle of paper fluttered to the ground at Matt's feet. He reached down and picked it up, regarding it with a curious eye before you could snatch it quickly away and tuck it back between the pages of My Antonia.

"New bookmark?" he queried.

"Something like that," you murmured.

You thought he might press you further about the Hangul characters he had surely noted on the back, but just then the captain's voice crackled over the intercom reiterating the weather conditions in Seoul and you took the opportunity to bury your nose back between the pages. You glanced clandestinely over at Matt, who had settled back into the Korean Herald, before pulling the little watercolor card from between the pages where it had been hurriedly concealed. Your eyes traced over the purple clematis trailing elegantly across the illustration as you wondered if 12 hours was, in fact, a millisecond or an eternity.

-End Ch. 1-

[yandereunsolved]

If the yans hate me touching my co-stars casually they are going to hate the end of most of our plays- because the professor is a hopeless romantic and he keeps either picking plays with romantic endings or changing them to have romantic endings, which is really funny when I think about it because it means most of the usual cast has kissed on stage with the rest of the usual cast, and also done the whole "method act relationships" which means there are like 3 different "couples" every time we start a new play and I have been asked if we're cheating on each other or poly by girls who realize we either start "dating" someone else a or just stop dating few weeks later, and I've also been asked if the entire theatre department is in a polycule because someone will have a fake partner and then kiss their real partner right infront of them and it's great, the yans would hate it because nobody could ever give a coherent answer about whos dating who, which means that even if they tried to spread the rumor that like, I was dating them and cheating or something (I can't imagine what they'd do other then just kill my co-star so, cheating rumor it is) people would just be like "huh, I wonder who thought they were dating, oh well" It's great, also if they killed my co-star I think I'd force them into the play but specifically as prop holders or background characters (we have enough of a group to have understudies, which tbh makes the relationship rumors even weirder because the understudies need to make chemistry with each other and the main actors because we don't know if we'll need to replace someone until the day of the play) anyway, the Targaryen's would be sitting there seething because the ending of a play is a kiss and there is literally nothing to hide the fact it's a kiss (unless the actor specifically asks for it because they aren't comfortable kissing, but I don't usually do that because I don't have a partner and don't mind most physical intimacy with people as long as everyone involved knows it's platonic- which the yans would also probably hate) but I'm also imagining the batfam with this because I think it'd be really funny if they can't info gather about my relationships past or present simply because everyone has a different answer- the school news paper has a section dedicate to break ups and get togethers for some reason, and that section has another section dedicated to theatre students specifically because the more dramatic theatre students- a rare breed for us, I know- will publicly and very over emotionally break up with eachother at the end of plays when they no longer need to make chemistry, and as such the batfam would be left trying to ask around because this couple broke up a few days ago?? why have they both gotten with someone else already??

-☀️ (sorry my response took so long- I've already got a project due for organic chemistry and have been focusing on that for a bit, so I didn't see your response until just now)

Don't feel bad for taking a second to respond! I take long to respond too. We've both got lives outside of Tumblr. You come first in your own life. You responding back to my responses can come somewhere below that.

The Targaryens would be having a day. A week. An existence. Like it isn't as if they can just kill everyone. ... Can they?

You are going to have to tell them no like cats. Probs get a spray bottle. It's mostly for Aegon. Aegon wants to date everyone you have 'dated' to learn more about you.

It also makes me think if they'll wonder if you are in some sort of brothel-theater mashup.

"Oh. But you kiss everyone. It's only a problem when I try to do it!?" (Aemond & Daemon, probably)

Helaena would just love to see the props and watch the rehearsals.

Alicent would like sowing costumes for you.

Rhaenyra is oddly protective in a way (besides the whole yandere thing) like "If one of them hurts you I will break all the bones in their body and have them strung from the ceiling. Love you, sweetheart. Have a great rehearsal."

[desertfangs]

I feel for people just getting into the books lol. But I agree and I think it's fair to ignore Merrick since Anne also ended up disregarding it herself. I remember during the book tour for The Wolf Gift, Anne did an Q&A talk, she said she didn't consider Merrick, Blackwood Farm, or Blood Canticle canon by the time she began writing Prince Lestat.

Which I found confusing because she mentioned Quinn in Prince Lestat, but she felt that just because the character exists doesn't mean the events that unfolded are canon. Which I found more confusing. I also recall Anne saying (maybe in the same interview maybe in a different one?) she tried to merge her witches and vampires together, but she never felt like she managed to reach the right tone. Which I do agree with.

Oh anon!! I also feel for people just getting into the books! In some ways, it's probably nice to just binge the books back to back and not wait years wondering (like after MtD came out and it was like... Is Armand really dead?????? Where is Daniel???) but also a lot gets shifted or retconned and it must be jarring to go from one to the other with the discrepancies and changes so apparent.

For me, I feel like canon has always been sort of nebulous. Like you can just pick the things you like, you maybe explain away the things you don't (Armand was TOTES lying when he said he sold most of Night Island! 😒), and you can also just sort of ignore stuff if it doesn't really work for you. But that said, I also totally get the desire to be as true to canon as possible and trying to reconcile all of it the best you can, which is a total valid approach as well! I do think canon has a lot of little unexplored nuggets and things to unpack and try to figure out. It's like the crossword puzzle of book series which is part of why I think it has so much staying power for me personally. There's a lot left off the page to explore or explain or try to work out.

It's so interesting to hear she didn't consider Merrick or Blackwood Farm canon anymore!! I don't think I'd heard that, although I am not surprised about Blood Canticle, that book feels like a failed experiment and I agree it did not succeed as a VC/Mayfairs crossover. I think the Talamasca's existence and maybe Quinn was enough of a crossover, tbh, I don't know anything more was needed. (Granted, what I remember about BC is Lestat being in the midst of a manic episode and Rowan being involved, and that's pretty much it.) I do recall she was trying to build up to some war with the Talamasca and I guess that never really came together.

Prince Lestat definitely felt like more of a return to form and trying to get all of the vampires in one place and even wrap up some loose ends from previous books and tell us where everyone ended up. Well almost everyone. I agree it's funny Quinn gets a mention.

As for Merrick, I'm sure there's some interesting stuff in there, at least about Louis, but I've never been able to convince myself to reread it. I do like the implication that he and Armand came together after the events of that book and he moved in Trinity Gate because of shared trauma over suicide attempts, and that they found some healing with each other. But overall, it wasn't a book I enjoyed.

Thank you for sharing, anon!! This is really good stuff! Also LMAO thank you for reminding me The Wolf Gift exists. That book was a wild ride for sure! 💖

[frida--y]

blessed by the shugods!!

god I love kingoh, such an ambitious sentai... I think it really won me over in the end though!! The way it started with Jeramie's narration and the way it ended with it <3 I will say I loved the first half so much, the interpersonal royal drama of all- loved it. I also loved how it started to seed the story of redemption for the Bugnark with the introduction of Jeramie. I think it''s important to write a story of oppression and relationships. I do think it was overly ambitious in the end!! The bugs just got SO sidelined after the introduction of Duggy. But still, we got such a happy ending of not really homogenizing into one country, but to allow cultures to expand, to interact and grow from those interactions. Maybe love will bloom from it!!! I hope Jeramie tries to attend every wedding.. he would cry so much.

SO hard to say more from the story, it's such a packed one! Some things happen with such weight and then "it's actually fine no worries :)" next episode. I would of loved to see all the plot points fully expanded in a manga or a multi-season series.

THE CAST!!! THE RETAINERS!!!!!

You can really feel Taka's love for this series, he's really the show's biggest fan. Everyone feels fleshed out enough, and it's hard to pick a fav (it's jimmy). MAAN. What a show.. great passionate show tbh.

GOD is Kagu the best... BEAUTIFUL MAN. I loved all his focus episodes. It was also fun guessing how much he was playing Racles or helping him, and now knowing that he's been believing in Racles since the wedding just makes me want to rewatch.

Who else is the best.. Jeramie.. I LOVED it when he stopped talking between the lines and blurted out what he feels. It's so cute.

Even Himeno! I love how passionate she was on the kingoh legends, it's a difference from Yanma who vaules tech more and learns to have faith in the legends. Yanma's so full of charm, really love him too. Rita is the best, what else can I say..

Impossible to pick a hard fav from the main kings.. easy tie with Rita and Kagu though for the top.... and Jeramie. They each have their strengths and I'm glad we got to see the odd dynamics near the end too.

For Gira, I really liked him ever since the first episode. His acting was great! Although I loved the doomed and fated sibling relationship, I think the show should of showed us more of Gra's thoughts when he thought he killed Racles. It's not really implied he knew he didn't die (unlike according to bts), I think Gira should of been more fucked up he killed his only family... Yano did a good job displaying on his face how their first duel really messed him up.

Number one cunt in my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seeing through Racles lies/act was so satisfying, all the way back to his first fight with Gira, I knew something was up with him. I loved his seemingly emotionless behavior in the first half, when he had the all the chances to kill his brother and didn't take it, episode 20 was fantastic in this regard, and we got SUCH a treat with 42 telling us all of the truth. especially knowing all the context. And maaaaaaan, I knew his reaction to "killing" Yanma was special.. god if anything Kingoh gave us an amazing character arc with Racles. He had great dynamics with the other kings (Yanma n Jeramie in the second half), BUT I kinda wanted him to have more scenes with Rita though, considering he basically wrecked their country by trying to reveal the traitor. Him trusting Suzume with his life and wanting to reach out to Kagu <33333 one of my fav dynamics <33 tormented by the bees <;3 GOD kagrac was SOO real...

I love how his actions were never excused, both by the character and everyone. Just getting my thoughts about him during his worst validated was satisfying. His interactions with Jeramie and Yanma post reveal were my favorites.

Just.. being right about how power hungry he really was (not as an act).... Racles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I usually don't get swayed by shipping art but.. Suzume and Racles fanart really sold me on them.. the show really helped too, but.. I think they're so cute lol. Re-falling in love after being married is so.. IT'S SO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If I had ONE major complaint... other than the Bugnark's plight getting sidelined HARD in the second half, I think Suzume's character really fell to the wayside. I liked the Morphina and Suzume episode, but it really highlighted Kagu more than Suzume. It really should of been more about her feelings on ruling Tuofu than her dream of marrying someone she loved, cause why would that stop her from ruling???

ride or die couple of the year <3 they should of ended ON TOUFU WHERE RACCY WAS ON A FARM!!!!!!!!!!

kingoh :)

man. what a show!! Going to miss it a lot... crazy good highs in my opinion. The world is just rich enough to play around with it in your head, which makes it fun!!

bonus: my many pics of Yano

I can post many more..I will restrain.. one of the most gorgeous men I've seen <3 his long hair when he got married though............................... many thoughts. They should of let him keep his facial hair. I have been seeking out his other works so far and I really do hope the film Wheel and Axle gets a release... it showed at a film festival so I assume it must have a subtitle track done.

love him so much I made him a birb friend n dressed up my plush!!

[eternitas]

Hi Lou!! Tbh, I'd love to ask you...all of the selfship questions, but I'll be nice and say 1-4 uwu for Gokudera! [Unless you're cool with answering them all 👀✨️]

Just for fun selfship ask meme

Thank you so so much for sending this in! ... 3... months ago orz I am so so sorry for answering so late, I hope waiting for my answer was worth it QwQ

1. does your f/o have any special nicknames for you? what are they? do you have a favorite?

Gokudera isn't exactly super openly affectionate or romantic. He is pragmatic and when he is romantic it is a rare, but genuine moment just between them. While he doesn't have a special nickname, he does sometimes call Rena "tesoro" (itl. treasure) and has refered to her as a sun or glowing star, though never to her face.

2. do you and your f/o share any hobbies? what are they? do you see one another as rivals, collaborators, something else?

Rena and Hayato are competitive spirits and often get into little competitions with each other that usually hold either no stakes but their pride, or chores and small gifts. It's never harsh enough that Dera becomes seriously upset over a loss (he actually really appreciates that she can give him a run for his money), but it's also never completely trivial. These competitions can range from who gets to a place first, to directly facing off in a video or card game (especially with poker and other games where you have to keep your reactions in check Rena usually has the upper hand due to her knowledge in acting and directing, being able to pick up on the subtlest of changes in Gokuderas demeanor, who still has a hard time keeping his emotions in check).

Interestingly enough when it comes to hobbies they diverge a bit. Rena loves to be creative, her work at the theater is incredibly fullfilling to her, so she spends a lot of time going to see different plays and reads new pieces. Hayato is also very creative, but his creativity leans more towards the engineering and constructing. In that they are supportive with and towards each other, but don't necesarily always partake in the others interest. However they both are interested in the supernatural, with Rena being a scaredy cat that is mostly into mythology and the occult while Hayato is more interested in cryptids and extraterestrials. Hayato likes going ghost hunting or cryptid hunting and once in a while he can persuade Rena to tag along though not without promising up and down that he won't scare her on purpose and that he'll protect her if anything does happen.

One hobby they do participate in together is movie nights. They switch up who picks the movie and each one of them has a chance to veto a pick. They both enjoy watching all kinds of movies and talk about them, dissecting story, special and practical effects, character writing and acting, directing- they can both contribute their own knowledge to these talks which are even more enjoyable to them than the movies themselves.

Small picrew I edited depicting them watching a scary movie.

Original

3. do you have any songs that remind you of your f/o? a playlist? what do they think of it, if you’ve shared it with them?

Okay so I USED to have a playlist but I deleted it orz, tho there are two songs I def remember associating with this ship which is

Cinderblock Garden by All Time Low and Perfect by Topic and Ally Brooke

4. where are your favorite places to go with your f/o? what’s your favorite part of that place, or the time you spend together there?

When it comes to favourite places to be at then there come only 3 to mind. First is Renas apartment. It's a small 2 room flat with an open kitchen, a big livingroom with a narrow balcony and a small bedroom. It's cozy but not claustrophobic and Hayato stays over a few times. After a very eventful day it's nice to flop onto the sofa and watch a movie together.

Then there is one of Renas favourite cafes. It's in a sidestreet of the city, rather small and has a bit of a maritime country-chic flair with exceptionally good coffee and cake. They don't usually house big groups or many people so it never feels cramped and or overwhealming when it comes to the surounding noise.

Last but definitely not least is the westpark. It's close to the Residence where the Neo Vongola stay in italy and is often place of performances by Renas theater group Mosaico. It's a nice small park with one half of the park being mostly greenspace for people to chill on and the other being a bit more groomed, layed out and romantic with benches and grenery tunnels.

(Thinking specifically about the passages I personally know, here, here, and here, plus a well kept flower garden park as depicted here)

In general: anywhere where it's not too full and too loud is a nice place for them to hang out.

[got-into-worm-by-mistake]

Arc 1, Reflections

Well, Arc 1 down, time to reflect.

First and foremost, I do like it. I mean, I'm not really happy in some ways that I'm committing myself to reading this whole thing, and a significant part of the reason I'm reading worm now is because I have fic ideas I developed after reading all the discussions I read and reading various fanfics, and I at least have enough self-respect as a fanfic writer to believe one needs to read the source material to write fanfic about it.

Also spite, tbh. Because while yes, one cannot have a completely informed opinion about things that happen in a story without consuming that story, one can still have a reasonably informed opinion under some circumstances, and I'm going to find out if my opinion on the thing is the same once I've read the whole thing. (I was going to read it eventually anyway, or so was the plan, but spite plays a role in why now. If my opinion doesn't change, I'll feel vindicated, if it does, I'll never mention the previous thing again and pretend it never happened).

Anyway:

As a first arc, there's not that much that happens apart from the Lung Fight (which is like saying not much happens in the first half of a New Hope that isn't Darth Vader killing Obi-Wan, I suppose), but there's some vital establishing character moments, key worldbuilding, and a ton of tantalizing questions left open - what caused Taylor to be hospitalized? Where did the powers come from? If you judge the timelines around, the two are linked, obviously.

Why do Emma, Sophia and Madison hate her? Why is the school system quite this fucking broken (Which, tbh, I don't really buy. Each part of the bullying feels realistic, but the whole picture *and* the sheer degree by which the system is just... doing nothing, really does strain credulity. There's a reason a lot of fanfics use various fanon explanations to try to make sense of it. As a whole, it all feels a bit gratuitous).

I believe I heard once that Wildbow tried out a lot of main characters for this story before settling on Taylor, and I wonder what it is about Taylor in particular that made him think it was such a good choice. She doesn't seem a bad choice, and obviously without Taylor Worm either doesn't exist or is unrecognizable, so obviously it worked out.

Danny wants to be a good dad, and just... can't. There's too much going on, crossing that distance is hard, and each day it gets harder.

Taylor desperately wants to be a hero, but stumbles right out of the gate.

Armsmaster is a hero, but he's also a bit of a prick, even if his prickishness in this scene has been overstated.

The powers and the way they work, such as we know of them, are fascinating to think about so far. How do they interact, what cancels what, etc? I can certainly see why this story would have hit Spacebattles's buttons so very hard - right at the start you get the seemingly weak power being overoptimized and used to nearly take down a guy like Lung, who is presented as a huge hitter. Sure, it take's Bitch's dogs to really take him down at the end, but even then, the dogs alone probably wouldn't have been enough either.

But when Taylor used her powers cleverly, along with a bit of luck, and then the fortuitous arrival of the Undersiders to help finish the job... well, in the end, it does rather work.

Overall, I can also see why people bitch about TINO so much - though I suspect a lot of that is people not understanding things like different interpretations or not thinking about how different experiences will change a person - but also, I can see why it would come up so much.

Taylor's voice is a little hard to pick out, because... well, it's all Taylor's voice except in the interludes. But the writing in the main chapters (of Arc 1 anyway)... it feels more like... narration that is detached, than by a character who's right there in it all, feeling the emotions.

Honestly, I felt more emotional depth from Danny in his 3rd person interlude than I did from Taylor in her 1st person main story, at least pound for pound.

Not that we don't get any hints of Taylor's emotional state at various places, we do, but it feels much more... tell, rather than show.

Which may be a function of the way Taylor acts and feels, especially after a year and a half of bullying, but I also think it's a limitation of the 1st person narration, tbh.

There's a reason why I don't really care for it. Not enough to make me not read it, but enough to be noticeable.

Anyway, all this aside, I do like it. Fic ideas or spite aside, if I didn't enjoy it, I wouldn't choke it down. I'm not that kind of masochist, nor do I have that kind of time.

[princess-of-the-corner]

the villain competency thing was something I was thinking about recently like. at least with Gabriel we have the whole kids vs adults, new generation vs old generation type thing and we didn't know much about him other than he was bad. additionally, since he was Adrien's dad, he had a control over him even without the sentinonsense. he posed a threat on both sides of the fight.

With Chloe and Lila, we were given them as civilians except they've made one so stupid that she's become an illiterate puppet scapegoat and the other can't even lie well without making other actually established smart people stupid enough to fall for it. And yeah they tossed in that bs with her fooling three separate adult women but like, idk i feel like that says more about them being incredibly negligent parents than it does about her cause is she just doing it for fun? what's that got to do with our heroes at this point in time? what's it show besides the fact that rather than making Lila actually great at manipulation you decide to show her manipulation by giving us scenes of something more "horrible" than her lying about knowing celebrities to a bunch of high school kids.

so if they decide to make this dumb blonde and plot armor liar our Big Villains from this point forward, they've got their work cut out for them. Like they're gonna keep retconning shit so it doesn't actually matter but if they cared at all about continuity then they can't make Lila the main lead villain without making her or the miraculous team look useless. If they're going with the callback to whatever scared her at the end of season 5 and have that help her be the main villain then damn she couldn't even do the evil shit herself huh? and if it's mainly just her and the akumas then high chance they'll toss in the heroes and have them be just as dumb as when they were around her at school. but then it'd be "why did Marinette give miraculouses to such pathetic heroes?" in the same vein of "wow the class was stupid enough to believe Lila's shitty lies" and it wouldn't even be their fault, it would be because they keep giving Lila plot armor. at the very least, the fact that Gabriel just kept doing the same thing over and over and kept losing was because that was established before they decided to be more story driven.

Chloe can't be smart. Austruc would absolutely refuse. so then you run into the same problem again except this villain is easy to beat and if you're all going against her at once then you're all the bullies at that point tbh. but also like, 18 vs 1?? gross. And she wouldn't even be a fun villain if she was stupid either. nowhere near Team Rocket levels of amusing cause at least they were their own characters. if they decide to make her a senti, it'll be bad either way cause they're def not gonna add any nuance to that. if they decide to make her good (highly highly highly doubt), it's going to be like those fics where Chloé has to go through so much shit as "punishment" that she's basically going deeper than the rock bottom of being literally abandoned by her dad and being abused by her mom that it's still a salt fic no matter how you spin what side she's on.

it's just like, the worst of characterizations of these characters and you picked every single bad story thread/end of each story arc of the past few seasons and it's a mess i don't have confidence in their writing to fix. but considering the writers' (specifically Austruc tbh) tendency to "we do what we want when we feel like we need to" attitudes to plot (side eyes that tweet about timeline) then highly doubt they'll even touch on old shit cause, as said by a different tweet, the Agreste Family Arc is over. they're def just gonna move on.

Yeah it's a mess