#i don't think she gets enough credit for simply existing

[thebeigelunatics]

can we discuss how for so much of standish's life, she was (due to alcoholism) deemed unstable or destructive but somehow she's managed to create a life now where she's considered someone's safe place and people feel comfortable leaving their grandparents and cats with her. i'm so proud of her for surviving! i'm so happy she fought hard and became a person everyone could count on. 🥲

[blackbatcass]

how would you rank bat-children from bruce's least favorite to favorite? also i'd say do the same for ollie's kids but he would kill himself if you made him do that (mia still his fav though)

oh my god you guys do want me dead💀

I'll be honest, i don't think there's much value to be found in 'rank-the-favorites' discussions. like the honest answer is 'it depends' and i just don't think it's productive. I do think that in most cases wrt relationships with bruce, dick is always going to come out on top. as i've said those two are just on a whole other level. they Know Each Other in a way that no one else will even come close to. I don't think it's controversial to posit that actually raising dick from childhood adds a layer to the relationship bruce has with him that really can't be replicated with anyone else. like...jason was with him for 2-3ish years as a tweenager, cass and tim were adopted in their mid teens. meanwhile bruce was effectively dick's parent from age 8 onwards.

I also think the timing is something that would be almost impossible to replicate. dick entered the picture very early into bruce's years as batman. bruce was the one solid thing in dick's life after his parents died. they were literally each other's crutches through all that emotional turmoil and became, for better or for worse, extremely codependent. all that to say, dick and bruce's relationship is just so crazy insane that pretty much nothing compares. he just has the advantage. you can't recreate the mind bogglingly deep connection 25 yo bruce had with 8yo dick grayson it just can't be done.

on the other hand, cass also has something with bruce that can't be replicated by anyone else: she is Exactly Fucking Like Him. she is his carbon copy. they Get each other's rock-solid convictions & moral code sooo deeply. fandom tends to use this as evidence to point towards cass being the favorite child, but like as greta mysterycitrus has eloquently said in the past, she is exactly like him (derogatory). bruce obviously loves cass deeply, that is his daughter, but I don't think having that relationship with her is always easy for him. her existence points out some uncomfortable truths about himself that he doesn't always want to confront. I mean... if you were to meet yourself as a seventeen year old it would probably be weird as FUCK lol. I especially think the fact that cass has killed someone really fucks with his head and forces him to reevaluate his own morals/worldview.

and like...I don't think he always treats cass fairly. we see it over and over again in bg 2000. he thinks he knows what's best for her because he sees himself in her, but the things he thinks are best for himself are Not Healthy to say the least. he intentionally keeps himself at a distance because he initially did not want that close, father-daughter relationship with her: it was strictly batman and batgirl. and he thought that's what she wanted/needed. but being so singlemindedly driven to a cause with no boundaries or normal life is not exactly the best way to go for a teenager. so I think those two had a lot to figure out when the dust settled.

I have much fewer thoughts about jason, tim and damian simply because they are not my blorbos like dick and cass are lmfao. i do think tim deserves a whole lot of credit for stepping in to save bruce and helping when bruce was at his lowest. like. that was obviously NOT easy lol. bruce and tim are interesting because bruce held himself back from being a father to tim for so long, when jack was still in the picture. but when it comes to a head and tim gets adopted, it's just...natural? like there was nothing else that could have happened there? I am honest to god not the biggest tim fan and have not read enough of his comics to talk intelligently on him any more than that lol. but I do know bruce loves him very very much and would be lost without him<3

jason....jason. I mean what is there to say lmfao. if your dead teenager turned up and started mass murdering what would you do. I think it's pretty obvious to say that losing jason was soul-crushing for bruce and permanently changed him as a person; we see those aftereffects in his relationships to people like tim, steph, and cass. jason will never stop being his son, and bruce will never stop loving him. but things will never be the same again. I don't think jason's actions post-resurrection will ever be justifiable or forgivable to bruce. like even if jason woke up one day like 'suddenly i'm cured of being a villain' I don't think he would be welcomed back with open arms or anything. jason is a murderer. he has killed like a fuckton of people in cold blood. that is something that will never be okay with bruce. grappling with loving your son versus your son being a murderer which is antithetical to everything you have spent decades building...that's rough buddy. is that controversial? idk i spend as little time as possible thinking about jason todd

I think it hurts bruce to look at damian sometimes because he just can't stop seeing talia. I think he loves damian deeply but it isn't always easy. that whole timing of final crisis was just so messy that they didn't get off to a super smooth start and had to do a lot of work rebuilding that relationship. I think damian has to reconcile his childhood hero worship of bruce with the actual very flawed man which isn't easy. it has been a LONG ass time since i've read damian's comics so that's about all I got.

IN CONCLUSION! This is very long and I absolutely did not answer your question sorry. but these are kind of my cliffnotes thoughts on each of the wayne kids' relationships with bruce.

and yeah if you tried to get ollie to rank his kids he would knock himself out with a boxing glove arrow

[cfr749]

I love your 6x04 spec about Lucy's camera being broken and her being investigated! You should totally write a fic about that if you're inspired ✨️

hi anon - thanks for the ask!

So @literali1110 pointed out to me that there were footage from Lucy's camera after the fall, so doesn't look like this is the route they'll go 😂

I do keep circling back on how hesitant Angela and Nyla looked when Lucy made her suggestion, and it makes me wonder if they may end up questioning whether protocol was followed or something instead? Or maybe Lucy will simply struggle with her own feelings of guilt around ending up in that situation because she was trying to prove herself?

I am glad that there's not really any ambiguity about whether she had to take the shot and whether the guy was 100% guilty, because I think it would destroy Lucy if those things were in question.

I'm definitely feeling some angsty inspiration from Lucy's struggle this season; jury's still out on whether it ever becomes anything more than random sentences in my notes app.

Regardless, I'm gonna hijack this ask to ramble a little bit on why I'm actually okay with the choices they've made and the story they are telling for Lucy this season so far. Like a lot of people, I hate seeing Lucy going through a hard time and of course I want to see her be supported. Give me the scene with Tim in the hospital a million times over; I'll never get tired of seeing that she is valued and loved by the people in her life. We honestly haven't gotten enough of that for literal years.

We've seen Lucy go through so much. But in five+ seasons, we've barely seen Lucy be anything other than her sunshine-y self for more than a handful of scenes. Even more so in the last few seasons. It is beyond time the writers take the time to give her character more depth and emotional range. It is beyond time they turn her back into a character that is deeply empathetic and relatable to the audience.

It has sucked seeing more and more commentary on social media the last few seasons about Lucy being childish, silly, unprofessional, and even manipulative 😭. And I think that's a direct result of the lack of care and intention the writers have put into writing her character since she graduated the FTO program. She's been used as little more than comic relief and a plot device outside of the ship for way too long.

Gif Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

While other characters have progressed professionally, Lucy has remained mostly stagnant since she graduated the FTO program, beyond a few UC missions that all pretty much ended the same way without doing anything progressive for her character (why didn't we see her struggle with the ethics of UC work when it came to using Aaron's puppy? why haven't they helped us understand how she reconciles her love for UC work to her empathetic nature and the reason she became a cop?).

I think of Lucy's journey in comparison to Tim's -- we've seen him go through awful things. We've seen him suffer. We've seen him struggle. We've seen him evolve and grow.

With Lucy, we've mostly just seen her go through awful things and move on as if nothing has changed. We all have our head canons, I think, about grief and coping and what's going on under the surface, but we don't actually know what she's feeling 99% of the time.

Do I wish they would have taken the opportunity to explore the impact on her character in the aftermath of DOD or after Jackson died? Of course I do. I would have preferred that to having to see her struggle professionally in the shadow of Nolan getting handed success for simply existing. (And if I thought they intended the juxtaposition, I'd give them credit for telling a realistic story, but I seriously doubt it 😂).

But I'm still glad they are taking the time to tell a story for her now. And I'm glad they seem to be doing it with intention.

And this was not at all what you asked about, but here you go anyway, anon 😜🥰

Thanks for the ask!

[roykleinberg]

Oh now you have me curious about your spicy takes! 👀

hooooo boy okay, some of this is about the franchise and some of this is about the fandom (which I love with all my heart okay please no one throw rocks at me lol)

90% of program/user ships give me the ick

continuing on the shipping train of thought, I don't actually find the Encom trio (Alan/Lora/Flynn) all that compelling as an ot3. and a lot of it is a personal pet peeve I've come across in a number of fandoms, but honestly most m/m/f ot3s feel like they're just a way for people to focus on the m/m dynamic while patting themselves on the back for "including" the female character instead of sidelining her completely........ even though said female character is rarely if ever a major contributor to the dynamic or a focus of whatever fanwork. but on a less meta side eye note I just find the perceived sexual component of Alan and Flynn's relationship to be the least compelling thing they could've had going on

and I know she's barely brought up in canon outside of Betrayal but uhm Jordan exists??? and perhaps it is an unpopular opinion but I would like to see more of her in things instead of relying on Lora to be the only human woman in the Tron universe

once again I might not be so harsh on Uprising if there was more to it, but taking it for what it is and how much of it exists -- a lot of the episodes were boring filler to me. also I don't like how they drew Tron

actually I don't like how Tron has been drawn in any rendered/animated media with the exception of maybe Kingdom Hearts

I don't think of Rinzler as a standalone character, and he's not at all interesting to me when removed from the fact that he is Tron with the serial numbers filed off. I feel like I've increasingly seen people portraying Rinzler as his own thing and it simply does not work for me. I think the whole point of his character / existence is that he doesn't have thoughts or feelings or any real personality of his own. he's a backflipping blank slate whose only real character moments are when Tron's overwritten personality peeks through

to that end I can't conceive of an ending where Tron or anyone around him would allow him to remain as Rinzler, and I can't imagine that Rinzler's capable of forming an autonomous opinion to not want to be Tron again

the fandom collective spends too much time talking about how hot the live action and animated men are and not enough time talking about how hot the Sirens are. or how hot Yori is especially in the deleted love scene. or how hot Paige is. or

Daft Punk (rightfully) gets a lot of hype for the Legacy soundtrack, but Wendy Carlos's soundtrack for 82 is unfairly slept on. love that those funky robots got to cameo, but we should be giving Carlos just as much credit for her work

for as much as it pains me to say it, I don't think Tron ever would've been a tentpole franchise for Disney even if they had treated it better. and it's mostly because of the sad fact that the general public has never been that into Tron. I see it tossed around a lot that Disney ditched Tron in favor of focusing on Star Wars and Marvel. A New Hope -- an original sci fi movie that had absolutely no brand recognition, so to speak -- made over $400 million in 1977. the original Tron made $50 million in 82. the first Iron Man movie -- which sure had comic fan recognition but was still a very early comic blockbuster -- in 2008 made over $500 million. Legacy made just over $400 million in 2010. and Disney advertised the shit out of Legacy, they didn't set it up to fail. yes it sucks that things like Uprising were dealt a bad hand (a garbage release schedule that lead to poor viewership that definitely killed the show), yes it sucks that capitalism impacts what art gets made, but the fact of the matter is that Tron has always had niche appeal, and niche appeal does not a successful franchise make. and while it'd be nice to live in the universe where Tron blew up, I look at what's become of Star Wars and Marvel and maybe I don't lament it all that much

[kyriefae]

The Web Planet was an incredible story.

Long live The Light! 🔆 ...but not the evil one ofc; boo hiss!

As more of an aside before I get started, I fear the spark of magic that opened the door to stories like this one being performed the way they were in their time is gone. Not only because of graphics or budget...but can you just imagine how much of an uproar it would cause if we said let's go back to doing stage performance science fiction! Like full blown, all on a set, all choreographed as if for a live studio audience?

How "cheap" people would say it looks?

I appreciate the overtly campy stories we still get in the modern era even more watching older ones like this.

Makes me think of that teetering line between the harm of nostalgia & the joy it carries.

I digress from the 'what if' games to say what I came here to say about The Web Planet: it dives bravely into the world of absurdism and science fiction and I greatly appreciate the production team for choosing to make such an esoteric story! We don't get a history of Earth from the perspective of Britain or a future of Earth taken over by Daleks, instead we get a genuine attempt to play with the genre and be creative about what may exist out there in this wide and expansive universe.

I celebrate stories like this because they're inspired from a place of whimsy. No matter the quality of the costumes; astigmatism-like camera effect, or fumbled lines by the lead performer...were not in our own galaxy and we're encouraged to play along and go for a ride.

A full-on psychedelic ride.

Additionally so, it's clear Ian, Barbara, and Vicki can barely count on The Doctor to protect them at this stage in his travels...adding verisimilitude to their life-threatening moments.

As for the Doctor, he's a madman who lost his box. So he lies on impulse to trick a voice in the sky who communicates with him through a drop down 'hair-dryer' {in Hartnell's words}. Further placing everyone he knows in danger.

Love the dichotomy of this original iteration compared to our modern understanding of the character. The retcons that have followed regarding previous lives with less morally upstanding behavior and time lord society being malicious and manipulative, the First Doctor being so...careless of others is not so alien anymore.

The heart of it all, Hartnell chose to make this man alien in his demeanor and what The Web Planet highlights most are the lives of everyone else around the Doctor making exceptional choices in spite of the chaos. The Doctor simply receives all the credit in the end...that cheeky, maniacal bastard! 😅

Bonus silly points for Hartnell saying "explortation" instead of exploration as the captions would have you believe above.

Like, how many takes did they do before just saying whatever we need to get this episode out! 🤭

Final take on this episode: Barbara. I just love her so much!

She is so knowledgeable. So patient. So witty. When she's talking to Vicki and Vicki calls aspirin medieval? Her response was so teacher-like. So professionally backhanded while being compassionate enough to still offer this smug child aid. Like yes, I look up to your example Babs.

She is also a lot of fun to watch while the gold bracelet she'd received from the creepy arsonist Nero in the previous story was being used to control her movements. She hammed that silly stage direction right up.

And she was the hero of this particular story. Get it girl! 🎉🥰 History teacher for the win!

Classic Who is such a journey, y'all. I'll avoid delving into the cringe I experience on a relatively frequent basis when Hartnell speaks to young ladies (shuddering at all the excessive shoulder and face touching).

Erhem--I mean...

Huzzah for Vrestin & Friends!! The Light prevailed!

...all thanks to The Doctor. 🫠

[popculturebuffet]

Uncle Scrooge: The Secret Santa Spell Review (comission by WeirdKev27)

Happy Holidays all you Happy People. It's that time of year again, time to haul out the holly and the breadcrumbs because we're talking about ducks again. Yes while I haven't talked about ducks nearly enough on this blog as of late, finding a Ducktale for christmas has always been a priority.

This year though Kev took the reigns on this one after realizing this was a tradition, and found me TWO. We were originally going to do the darkwing duck christmas special, something I didn't know existed and still know little about on purpose and still plan to next year.. but then... he found this. See back in 2021 I reviewed the Carl Barks comic a letter to santa. You can find the review here.

But the main takeaway is it features THIS iconic scene

Look saying i'm a simple man would be a boldfaced lie, but sometimes it's the simple things like an absurdly rich duck and his nephew fighting to the death with heavy machinery so one of them can give their nephew's the remaining machine as a christmas present that bring me joy on this holiday season.

That said after years of basking in the warm glow of having randomly found a comic about Scrooge and Donald battling to the death with steam shovels, I found something just as holly jolly.. and just as gloriously, wonderfully nuts. My friends it's time I introduced you to the Secret Santa spell.

Again Kev, my producer of sorts, deserves the credit here: he found this in Disney Christmas Parade, IDW's christmas anthology they printed every year for a while, and god bless him for it as this story is gold. It's a genuinely good, well done Magica story that thanks to taking place on christmas and involving a claus somehow less thought out than the one where if you kill Santa you become Santa, figgy pudding, a murder tree, and a volcano finale, is also completely bonkers and I love every second of it. This is a geninely fantastic scrooge story and one worth taking a look for yourself if you can find it online since it's out of print. For those of you who can't or simply don't wanna, come with me under the cut as we explore the hap happiest christmas since bing crosby tap danced with danny fucking kaye while Donald and Scrooge tried to pummel each other with steam shovels.

This story comes to us from writers Fransico Artibani, Lello Arena and artest Silvio Cambolli. I hadn't heard of any of these people before this as i'm not really up on my itallian duck comics but they do an excellent job here and I certainly will be looking out for more of their stories.

For this story we open at the bin a few days before christmas as everything's winding down for the holiday and Donald's doing one of his last bits of slave labor for Scrooge when two Scottish obviously suspcious carollers show up. Scrooge apparently gets so many that both are and aren't villians in disguise he's worked up a bit of an extreme solution.. granted he wanted to just pour oil on them but then legal got involved.

So he has to go with the Virtuetron 3000, an elaborate setup he had gyro work up that puts MIND READING HELMETS

Yup i'ts magica.. I mean I can't blame Scrooge for being suspcious, turning her shadow into a teenager to sneak into the mansion only for said teenager to fall in love with scrooge's daughter, this ain't, but i'm less concered with Magica and Co's half baked scheme and more concered a man who underpays his employees, quite literally owns the town, and already has a fairly sketchy moral compass has MIND CONTROL technology.. and giant killer robots

You'd think this would be an out of character expendature... but he got it from a reliable presidental source

Scrooge did all this so he could have a restful christmas. Magica.. isn't having the same as she has some uninvited guests.

Okay so some introductions are in order as i'm sure some of you had the same reaction I did

Thankfully Inducks also indexed who they are. Starting with the one I DID recognize, the little tyke is Magica's niece Minima, the basis for Lena and Magica's exact oppisite: kind, selfless, cheery. The only thing she isn't inverted on is magical talent, as Minima has a knack for it.

The two strangers are Rosolio and Gramma DeSpell. Yes GRAMMA, that's magica's grandma. What's intresting is there's two distinct versions of the character that don't really contradict each other, with this one in the 90's becoming a bigger fixture, and there being nothing to say this isn't the same character given a Sabrina the Teenage Witch style makeover, just a few years BEFORE Zelda and Hilda's got there's in fact. Go figure. She's a bit of a hippie and tries to talk down Magica from her schemes.

Her sidekick here, and sexual harasser, is Rosolio, a mildly inepet magician who followed her from italy to hit on her.

So Magica's about ready to just abandon her magic shop and go.. fuck off or whatever when Minima innocently brings up something...

Yes folks, this is indeed our premise: Santa put in a clause in his magic that's somehow weirder than "If tim allen shoves you off a room tim allen become santa claus" or "If tim allen dosen't find a wife in time he ceases to be santa claus" or.. let's just say anything tim allen adjacent. If you wish for something seven times and happen to be some sort of spellcaster, you get it, regardless of morality, intent or what it actually is. Which DOES mean good news for one little boy man robot

But still raises a LOT of questions. It's not a bad concept, that asking for something enough means santa will take pity but why isn't their restraints? Why has Magica, someone Santa would objectively not liked asked 7 times? why have we only heard about a magic version of the junior woodchuck guidebook this once? why didn't we get a fourth season of ducktales so Frank could adapt this? These are the things that keep me up at night. This is also a thing that keeps me up at night.

Donald just admit you need glasses instead of taking it out on your children, for all our sakes!

So Magica goes to the north poll to deliver letter 7 personally while Gramma.. only stops Rogoilo from going with her then hopes she'll be okay.

Magicia isn't as an elf being pulled by a sleigh full of pengys and getting there late notices her. Honestly we wouldn't have this plot at all if the best boy pengy wasn't busy.

Magica is frozen solid and is revived by 30 cc's of hot chocolate. I don't know if Tom Hanks sang to her, he was also busy that christmas

Magcia repays this kindness by busting up the north poll, going on a rampage to find Santa since the elves handle letters. Keep in mind this ENTIRE act of the story, her getting frozen, her going on a rampage, her bringing an evil dead tree to life before fighting an army of teddy bears and snowman

YUP. You didn't think the insanity stopped at mind policing, killer robots, santa clauses and improperly placed penguins did you? Nope we get a full on offscreen lord of the rings battle complete with ents simply because Magicia wants to gloat in person. And despite this section being padding.. it works. of COURSE magicia would want to gloat to santa, of COURSE she coudln't wait for Christmas day. It's totlaly in character and her singing oh christmas tree or spitting out hot chocolate are just.. such nice character touches. Of course she's so dedicated to being evil she hates something sweet. OF COURSE.

It's something neat about this comic: i'ts bonkers, no question.. but it's also simply fantastic on it's own merit. The idea of Magica getting a santa wish is neat on it's own, but the story then uses Minima to anchor it: she's frustrated it seems her aunt will never be happy and always obess over the dime, and thus teleports to the bin to take it from her, not understanding WHY it's precious to scrooge or WHY her aunt wants it, simply wanting to make her aunt happy. No one even knows; the thought police helmet's don't scan ill intent.. because there isn't none. It's just an innocent child wanting to bring her Aunt christmas. This version of Minima reminds me a LOT of 87 webby, and it's in the best way: innocent , kind, selfless.. all the good things.

Anyways Santa finally goes to confront magica, wondering why she's doing this the answers no.. and forgetting his own stupid policy until it's too late, with her asking for the dime and him entering a trance to go get it.

It's christmas eve and Scrooge is bored as nothing's going on. Disturbingly he wants to know how litigatoins are going. Those orphans aren't going to be forced out into the snow themsleves, ghosts of past buisness partners be dammned!

Scrooge is interuptted from taling to Mrs. Quackfaster byt he arrival of santa. Thinking it's magica in a disguise , he sicks a robot guard dog on her he turns into a sheep.

But then we get the crowner, the weirdest, best, and most wonderful thing in this story.. I present...

I"ll level with you all, while holiday shopping was easy this year, i've still been dealing with a lot of seasonal depression and regular ole depression. It's been a long month with loved ones in the hosptial (nothing serious but also nothing you need to know about in full), work piling up and me not even taking the time to enjoy some of my gifts. I've had plenty of kind people, thoughtful gifts, and wonderful friends but sometimes the stress of this job, as much as I love it, and the world can get to you. So getting to just relax and review a comic where Santa turns Scrooge's bin into a giant figgy pudding while under hypnosis.. it helps> it warms the spirit and reminds me why I do this. For the joy of good stories.. and for the wonder of nonsense.

For those who like me wondered what Figgy Pudding actually even is, wonmder no more: it's a traditional british pudding made out of animal fat. You no doubt have more questions but we have more story

So Santa snaps out of it once he gives Magica the time and she teleports out. Scrooge asks santa to go get it.. but despite you know having TURNED SCROOGE'S BIN INTO PUDDING and stolen his prized possesion, he's .. less than helpful.

I just.. dude... man.. santa dude man claus... Christmas is important. It brigns joy to children and it's why youd o this. I get that. But how does "I need to return the dime I stole while BRAINWASHED due to a stupid bit of magic I never bothered to undo or work up a backup plan for", equate to "greed begats greed'.

For starters the Dime.. isn't just a dime.. and you should know this. Your santa. You know everything about a person, it's your deal. This dime was the first bit of honest money Scrooge ever earned, a reminder of what he started, something he dearly loves and treasures not because it's MONEY but because of what it means. And even not knowing that Scrooge didn't start any of this shit. Scrooge has to constantly ward off Magicia's crap, something you DO for a fact know as you rejected her wish till your dumbass magic kicked in. She's not trying to steal his hoarded gross amount of money, she's trying to take the dime and she's trying to do it for an evil plan. YOU KNOW BETTER SANTA.

Granted this could be a christmastime grift as Santa gets Scrooge to promise a big dinner and bonuses for everyone in duckburg, so he could've simply been fleecing scooge.. and I prefer that interprtation as it fits santa better: Santa would WANT to make up for what he did with magica and WANT to stop her because Santa is a kind, caring person. And even if she hadn't used the santa spell against him, she still attacked his elves out of spite. I prefer to think he would've helped anyway but knew Scrooge deserved to be taught a lesson which, fair play to the big guy.. Scrooge ABSOLUTELY did.

So they go to stop him while Magica goes to show off her dime.. and minima realizes Magica didn't open her present and thus dosen'jt know and is about to make an oopsie.

So Scrooge and Santa go to stop her, but can't... luckily thanks to Minima giving Scrooge a chocolate coin instead of giving her the midas touch, the spell gives her...

It's an excellent brick joke on Magicia hating chocolate, and a great visual. it temproarily makes her the sweetst duck in the world.. which leads to some shipping bait

But a genuinely sweet ending for Minima who, if for one moment and only thanks to magic.. gets to enjoy her aunt. I mean Magica becoming sweet thanks to choclate magic is KINDA Messed up.. but it's hard to not enjoy a child who simply wanted her aunt to be happy.. getting that for one breif moment.

I still feel bad for her as this won't lass, Magicia will be back to her abuse hateful self.. but I can't begrudge a kind, innocent little witch her happy ending. I just don't have it in me. It's not forever, Magicia gets herself back.. but for one day.. she'll treat her family how they deserve. And Rogilo how he really dosen't but you can't have everything now can you?

So because we can't just end on the sweet moment, Santa assures Scrooge the figgy pudding bin will turn back after christmas.. but until then.. he has a promise to fufill.

Every christmas story should end with the whole town eating a rich man's property. Hell EVERY christmas should. Eat the rich's buildings kids!

This story is excellent. Really werid? yes. Having a pretty bonkers ending for no reason? Yes. Is said ending hilarious, the throughline of Minima heartfelt, and the zanier stuff also really funny? Entirely. It's a well done Scrooge story set around christmas with santa's indgiance at helping scrooge being the only thing I really don't like. Had he phrased it less as "you brought this on yourself" and more "you don't deserve it after how you've treated your employees" it'd make more sense. Still one little bump dosen't ruin the figgy pudding.. I think. I don't know how figgy pudding works. I do like this story though and highly recommend it. Thanks for reading.

[jjnonken]

Been a while since I've posted. I've decided I hate Facebook again and for now I'm letting off steam here.

I said before that I'd deleted my long rant and just stuck to a mini-rant. Well, today I'm posting a long rant. Fair warning: This is a rant.

As far as I can tell, there's no good news about the Borderlands movie. They've changed Commander Knoxx's character to be Atlas's daughter instead of General Knoxx, so I guess she'll be Commander Atlas now. That... doesn't matter. Of all the issues I have with this movie, whose daughter she is is probably the least important. Actually, it's not an issue. Her EXISTENCE is an issue, but not which NPC is her parent. Atlas isn't even an NPC, it's just a gun manufacturer, presumably named after its founder. We never see the founder(s) nor, as far as I can remember, hear any backstory. I'm not sure which problem they were trying to solve by the rename.

First problem: We do have to rescue Lilith, Athena, and one other who I won't mention due to spoilers. I can only think of those three. Lilith tells you to kill her if you can't save her... "Better dead than a damsel." Athena engineers her own rescue; you're just the muscle. So there's kind of a dearth of damsels in this franchise. The movie's premise is that Commander uh... Atlas?... needs to be rescued. So, right. Damsel in distress. Kind of immediately contradicts the lore of Borderlands, who has strong women who generally don't need rescuing.

Second is: why General Knoxx's er, I mean, Atlas's daughter? She's a new character. It's like BORDERLANDS ISN'T CHARACTER-RICH ENOUGH, we have to add more just to get the plot started.

Edit: She still shows credited as Commander Knoxx in my web search, including on IMDB. I saw Atlas in the last article I saw on the movie. It's possible it was simply mistaken. I note parenthetically that Knoxx works for Atlas Corporation, and the DLC he's in is Atlas-heavy. Could just be a mistake. Edit to the edit: The Wikipedia article premise mentions her as Atlas's daughter. But she's named Knoxx. I'm fucking confused; which is she?

Next: They have Kevin Hart playing Roland. Kevin Hart is a comedian. Roland is a serious, somber, straightforward guy who never jokes and never laughs, or even smiles. Any humor that happens in relation to him works because it plays off his sober sincerity.

Roland: Oh good, you're not dead. Lilith: That's his way of saying "Hi". Roland: Sorry. Hi.

Why do they need a stand-up comedian to play Roland? Either Hart is trying to branch out and do some serious acting, or... they're making a comedy.

OK, Cate Blanchett is doing Lilith. I don't know if she's the best choice, but I don't know who else I'd recommend. I guess I'm OK with that.

As for Tannis... I love Jamie Lee Curtis, but she's a scream queen that also does comedies. Tannis isn't FUNNY, she's TRAGIC. Again, there's humor, but it plays off her personality, which is informed by her severe social awkwardness. (She's pretty much coded autistic. I don't know if it's canon.) No doubt the trauma she's suffered has exacerbated any existing personality deficits. Or caused new ones. Can Curtis do a sober Tannis? I mean, play her seriously, not deadpan. I don't know. Again, I don't think she's meant to -- this movie is looking more like a comedy every day. Could be worse, but I'm not sure I'd pick her.

Next, we have Claptrap, who is introduced as "The wise-cracking robot" and played by... Jack Black, a comedic voice actor. Thing is, Claptrap does not crack wise. He's hilarious, but that's because, similarly to Roland and Tannis, the game plays off his naive sincerity. He's funny because he's so serious, but clueless. I haven't memorized every line in the entire franchise enough to instantly recall everything that every claptrap robot has said, but as far as I can remember, Claptrap has told MAYBE three jokes on purpose. One is self-referential, spoken by a claptrap who is supposed to be programming the game: "Borderlands? More like Memelands, am I right?" One is spoken right after a hatch is automatically locked, trapping you in the first map: "I hear that getting eaten by bullymongs isn't such a bad way to go." Was that one a deliberate joke? Don't know, so that's my "maybe." And the third is from a side mission called The Iceman Cometh. It's a moderately silly pun that any 10-year-old would be proud of. When you (as a character) don't react, he then EXPLAINS THE JOKE. When you still don't react, he LECTURES YOU on the nature of humor. TWICE. Naive sincerity, not cracking wise. So again, this suggests the movie being a comedy.

So, we have two of the four vault hunters from the first game, Lilith and Roland. The roles of Mordecai and Brick are interesting, in that THEY AREN'T THERE. Why?

Tiny Tina is. She's a psychotic young teen with a penchant for explosives. She's got a connection to Brick, who -- for some reason -- isn't in the movie. She's not the kind of person who needs a bodyguard -- she's the kind of person against whom YOU need a bodyguard. I only bring this up because... ... Krieg is her bodyguard in the movie. Why? I already mentioned her connection to Brick. Krieg doesn't have a connection to Tina, he has a connection to Maya. I don't know when this movie is supposed to take place in the Borderlands timeline, but if Lilith is retired, it'll be between the first and second. Possibly around the time of the Pre-Sequel. We don't see Krieg until BL2, where he's added as the last playable character after the original four plus Gaige. So the timeline doesn't make sense and Krieg's connection to Tina doesn't make sense and Krieg being Tina's bodyguard doesn't make sense. I don't know anything about the actors, I may look them up and try to watch some of their stuff.

Tina doesn't show in the game until BL2, but there's no reason to think she hasn't been around since Borderlands, we just haven't seen her. (But only after the events of BL:PS, since it's Jack's slag experiments on Tina's parents that kill them and drive her into being a vengeful little psychopath.) But Krieg doesn't show up until he becomes a vault hunter? OTOH until then he was living as a psycho... probably on Pandora. So I suppose the timeline might be OK, technically. I'll give them that one. But I still object to the Tina/Krieg connection.

Gina Gershon as Mad Moxxi: Gina is an attractive woman, doesn't have Moxxi's curves, and she's 61. She's pretty hot-looking but I'm not sure she really fits the character, physically. Can she do Moxxi's va-va-voom? Don't know.

Charles Babalola: I don't know him. I try not to get upset at race lifts; I'm used to Sir Hammerlock being the "great white hunter" stereotype, but I suppose it doesn't hurt anything if he's black. At least he's British. This is a weak protestation at most. EDIT: Several people have pointed out that he's canonically black, which I never noticed. Well, OK then, that one's on me.

Bobby Lee plays Larry. He's another stand-up comedian. There sure are a lot of those for a serious film, eh? Also, who the fuck is Larry?

Ryann Redmond as Ellie: nobody's going to match Ellie's unrealistic proportions, but Ryann seems like a reasonable choice physically; basically, you just need a plus-sized woman who can act. I don't know anything about her acting but I presume she's competent, at least. Ellie is a smartass, so wise-cracking from her is welcome. So how come they cast a stand-up comedian as Roland but a serious actress as Ellie? The cognitive dissonance is making my brain cramp.

And Eli Roth has left the project and declared that he does not want credit for his writing. THAT bodes well.

This is supposed to be canon. Canon my ass. This is a TRAVESTY. EDIT: Somebody said it's not supposed to be canon. I read that it is. I'll try to dig up the reference when I get a minute. EDIT 2: Sorry it took me so long, I was busy procrastinating. Now, in my memory, when the first announced the movie they claimed it would be "true to Borderlands", but of course that's changed. I must have skimmed over the more recent "canon" phrasing, sorry. Apparently it's changed to "canon for the Borderlands Cinematic Universe", which is not the same as canon to the games. To me that's seems a bit disingenuous, considering that as far as I can tell, the Borderlands Cinematic Universe consists of one unfinished movie. (And calling it a "Borderlands Cinematic Universe" also seems a bit conceited since their first -- and so far only -- entry has been in Production Hell for 9 years and hasn't even finished.) So my apologies for getting the "canon" claims wrong, but I'm still unhappy and I think they're making excuses. They've taken an Action Movie script, grabbed some names from the Borderlands franchise, and pretended that the result is a Borderlands movie. They did that with Sly Stallone and the first Judge Dredd movie, remember? (Maybe you don't, but I was a fan of the comics. Fortunately the second movie was much, much better.) This makes me think of Stallone's Judge Dredd. (Also the anime version of the Lensman, but that one's pretty obscure.)

Anyway, I have more, but I think I've said what I need to. I may watch the movie out of morbid curiosity. I'm not going to dislike it out of spite, I'm not that hateful. I'll try to give it a chance. I just don't like the odds.

[shebeafancyflapjack]

Trapped (Final Part)

Credit to @idiotwithanipad for her art and always amazing oc. 🥰

"Gone? As in..." the Georgian woman clenched her fists as they held the heavy folds of her dress.

The Captain nodded, somberly; "Moved on, Kitty. Just like Mary."

"And Annie." Added Humphrey, to his left.

Kitty immediately began to sob, one hand moving up over her face as the tears fell. Pat rushed to her side and put a kind arm around her shoulders, his other hand finding the one at her lap, giving it a paternal squeeze.

He hushed her with gentle words and patient reminders of what they had apparently talked about the last time this had occurred, long before the newest ghost had choked on her energy drink, long before Button House Hotel even existed.

Meanwhile, Amy sat beside Kitty at the foot of the king-size bed in Higham Suite, displaying the polar opposite reaction. There was no sobbing, no tears, not so much as the tremble of her bottom lip. Her eyes were fixed, hard, on Robin, her brow furrowed, as if she were trying to decipher some secret he was keeping from them.

Humphrey watched his adopted daughter, eager to keep his head attached to his body for what he knew to be a heavy moment. One where she would need him to be whole.

"Poppet. You okay?" He asked, softly.

His hand itched to reach out and touch her shoulder. But the past few years of bonding with the odd but sweet young woman had taught him enough to know when she wasn't in the mood to be coddled, as Pat was doing with Kitty.

Amy ignored him.

"You saw her go?" She asked Robin.

The caveman was standing, rather uncertain, his shoulders slightly hunched and his right hand stroking across his furs with his knuckles. Humphrey also knew his friend after many centuries to know when he was feeling guilty.

Robin shook his head.

"I go to her last night. Hear her cry, me think from bad dream." He recounted, "By time me got to bed, Moonah girl no longer scream...Moonah girl no longer on bed. She go..."

He gestured his paws up to the ceiling.

Amy blinked; "How do you know that?"

Each word was enunciated with the most bitter cynicism.

"I...Where else she go?" Robin shrugged; "Me search all around land, Stompy, and every corner of house. She no here. Me can't smell mushrooms or funny herb."

"You're sure? A thousand per cent?!" Amy persisted, "You can't smell her at all?!"

"No. Well...except on bed, but-"

Amy pushed herself up and began walking briskly towards the door, her stern expression that of a girl on a mission.

"Amy, love, hold on a sec." Humphrey dared to try to take her hand.

Predictably, she pulled away.

Before reaching the door, she paused.

"When did this happen?" She asked, not turning around.

The others all looked to Robin.

"...Last night. Eleven dongs on big clock."

"And when did you tell the rest of them, except me and Kitty?"

"...I..."

Cap stepped forward; "Robin informed us at around three a.m."

Amy pointed a finger at the digital clock on the bedside table that read six thirty.

"And you waited another three and a half fucking hours to tell us?!"

"Poppet-"

"Don't 'poppet' me! Our best friend disappeared and you thought that was news that could wait until morning?!"

Kitty was too upset to be angry, by the looks of things, assuming she even felt such emotion. Heartbroken sobs continued to leave her as Pat kept his arm around her back.

The men all seemed to retreat an inch at the sharp rise in Amy's tone. Fanny, Thomas and Julian were absent from the room. Were they grieving in their own way or simply didn't care? It wasn't Amy's top concern right now.

"It didn't seem right to wake you so early for you to get upset-"

"We're not children, for fucks sake!" Amy protested; "Doesn't matter how all you wise old dads - that you seem think you are - look at us like we're silly little girls-."

"That's not-." Humphrey tried to protest but Amy shot him with a look so piercing that it came close to decapitating him a second time. He dipped his head; "...It was wrong of us. I'm sorry. It just seemed like the kindest thing at the time. That's all I can say."

There was more that Amy could say to chastise them for that. Temptation tried to convince her to launch into an anti-patriarchal rant on her pagan friend's behalf.

But the sight of all four men hanging their heads in shame softened her anger, just enough. Especially the sincere exhaustion on Humphrey's face. She'd awoken to find him sat in a chair beside her as she awoke, waiting for her to rise, gazing down at her with a mix of paternal affection and sadness.

There was no way she could stay mad at him.

The other one though...

"I knew something was wrong when you didn't wake me up by shouting 'mornies' in my ear like a fucking bullhorn." Amy snapped towards Robin.

He continued to stare at his boots.

"M'sorry."

For the lack of her usual alarm clock or the awful news he delivered? Or something else?

"I need to go to her bed." She explained, "I have to...see it for myself, y'know, before I can...You can come with me or not, I don't care-."

"Of course we'll come." Said Humphrey.

And this time, when he attempted to link his hand with hers, she allowed it.

Frank and Jeff, the groundskeepers, were just starting to prep the golf course before it could be opened up for use. They went about their daily work, watering the grass and picking up lost balls and discarded rubbish without any awareness of the dead girl in headphones and heavy black boots moving across the lawn, hand in hand with a Tudor Knight in a billowing red cloak.

Robin, Kitty and Cap followed close behind, Pat having gone to speak to the others about trying to get in contact with Alison. Most likely to arrange a memorial.

A memorial? Really? It seemed too soon. Barely eight hours. If no one saw her go then surely it was jumping the fucking gun, no scratch that, jumping a whole arse tank, to just assume she had moved on!

The hand around hers gave a squeeze.

"Listen. It's okay to feel angry, or in shock, or anything you're going through-." Humphrey tried to console.

"I'll go through all that shit and more when I know she's gone. Trust me."

He gave a nod, lips tightening beneath his beard. Christ, did he just think she was in denial? Maybe she was. Maybe it all seemed to happen to quick, and it was only two weeks ago Silver had wished them all a cheerful good night before Robin escorted her to the woods. There had been no sign, no big revelation or change upon her, nothing to hint that...

A niggle of accepting the possibility that her friend is gone begins to poke it's way in and she suddenly feels ready to puke. Fuck, what she would do for a cigarette right now.

All she has instead is Humphrey's hand, which took her long enough to realise she was almost crushing with frustration.

"Sorry!" She bit her lip, loosening her grip.

Humphrey smiled and winced; "S'what I'm here for, Poppet."

She's not prepared for the emotions that hit her like a ton of bricks when her eyes gaze upon the empty bed. Just as Robin had said. Her balance went off kilter, just for a second, causing her to sway on her feet.

Humphrey's hands on her arms steadied her.

"It's all right. I've got you." He reassured her.

Amy sniffed. No tears, not yet. But the threat was rising ever slowly upward from her chest.

"I'm okay." She let go of his hand and took a step forward.

Just an empty bed. It didn't mean anything. She'd looked at it hundreds of times like this when Silver was awake and chattering away at her side.

But everything about how it appeared this morning felt so grim. All the flowers and statuettes and fake candles, along with her plaque, but no sleeping girl in the centre, made it seem all the more like a gravesite.

"See? She gone." said Robin.

"I just can't believe it...We should have all been here." Kitty wept into the back of her hand, "Oh Silver, sweetheart, I'm so sorry you went alone..."

"I'm sure it was peaceful, Katherine." Cap soothed, patting her arm.

"Robin said she was screaming." Amy pointed out, bluntly.

"Amy-." warned Humphrey, lightly.

"Well, he did!"

"Uh, I say she was screaming, then she stop!" Robin clarified, "We no know if she happy or sad before going up."

"Given that everyone you've seen has looked at peace when they left, I think it's safe to assume the same can be said for Silver." Cap pointed out.

"Assuming she's even gone." Amy mumbled, intentionally loud enough for them all to hear.

The rest of them shared weary looks between them while the ebony haired girl continued to stare at the bed.

"Stompy. You smell like me able to." Robin approached her, carefully; "I smell her upon bed but no where else. There no vapor trail she leave if she move somewhere else."

"Maybe you're just losing your hunting skills in your old age." She quipped back.

Robin appeared knocked for six at that remark. Humphrey couldn't help but snort, as technically the ancient furball was only a few years older than his charge.

Amy began to inch towards the bed, nostrils flaring as she inhaled the scent lingering around the bed. Robin was right, Silver's distinct aroma of sage and boiled mushrooms lingered like an invisible fog over the bed. It always reminded her of the New Age shop in her town where she'd sometimes pop her head in. She might not have had an interest in the occult like her friend, but there was often some cool alternate clothes and junk to be oggled.

Another sniff. There was something else, not a smell her friend usually carried with all her witchy scents.

"What you got, love?" Asked Humphrey.

"...Salt? I think?"

"That sweat." Said the caveman, "Not Captain mornies joggy sweat-"

"Hey!"

"Nightmare sweat. Fear." Robin clarified, ignoring the disgruntled soldier.

Amy sat on the bed, glancing at the old lavender pillow decorated with stars that Alison had placed there for Silver's head years ago. Her callous mind conjured the image of her friend writhing and shrieking in unseen torment, all alone in the dark, while they'd all been cosying up in Higham Suite for the evening. While Robin, Fanny and Julian had gone down to watch the comedian, she and Kitty and Humphrey and Thomas had remained in the room. It had been the poet's turn to pick what to watch and, with no Julian to change the channel once he'd set it up, they all had to endure watching the latest season of Bridgerton.

Even Kitty, who lapped up romance like a cat to a saucer of milk, had grown tired of the show as her 'ships' never seemed to get together. Kitty and Amy had both quietly sniggered while watching Thomas and Humphrey get far too invested, before they both fell asleep.

"You should've been with us, dude." Amy spoke to the unused pillow. Never mind if she'd been asleep and unable to join in. No one should die...or move on alone.

Feeling the weight of acceptance begin to grow ever heavier, Amy moved to rest her head face down on the pillow. The scent of her friend, and the emotional torture that had plagued her in those last moments, was thickest there.

The hand that rested on her shoulder blades was soft and slender. Kitty sat with her on the bed, the two friends silently mourning their third musketeer.

I'm here, her mind screamed. I'm right here.

They're barely two metres from where she stands, trapped inside the thick, old trunk of the tree.

One word. One sound. That's all she would need to alert them of her presence.

But the hand of the creature has pressed itself so firmly over her mouth that it's elongated fingers have begun to fuse with the skin on her cheeks. The clamp of its fist around her arm, pinning it to her side, had almost melded into a shared limb.

"Mine. Mine."

Any longer and they'll be nothing of her left.

It has taken a few hours but she's figured out the demon's intentions. The desire is not to own her, but to become her. To make her body its own, perhaps to replace the skeletal, pale and blind one it currently inhabits. Had that once been a person as well, healthy and whole, only to have its spirit drained to the point its physical form resembled the stuff of folklore horror?

Was that her fate? If the creature succeeded in stealing her ghostly body, would she go on to stalk those inside the hotel who suffered the same night terrors?

Fuck...What if it was currently eyeing its next victim?

"Mine. Mine."

Tears continue to fall down her cheeks. It's the only action her body is permitted to do. Cry and be silent. Be still.

Hope, the cruellest jewel of Pandora's box, had blossomed inside of her at the presence of Amy. Amy, her best mate, who wasn't immediately weeping and looking sad like she was gone. Amy, whose brow was furrowed in scepticism and uncertainty. Twenty-first century kids don't buy so easily into bullshit as people think.

But even Amy, now, was kneeling on her bed as if visiting a grave. Her and Kitty were consoling each other, while the men hung back, not making a sound. Silver looked to Robin, whose expression she'd never seen so vacant and lost. While Captain and Humphrey's focus was on their respective surrogate daughters, Robin didn't seem to know where to look, swaying a little as if there was nothing left to ground him to the earth.

Oh it would be the most painful fucking irony if he was taken up at this moment. She'd curse Hermes, Thanatos and Hades for the rest of her miserable existence.

Silver knew he was waiting for them all to leave before he could allow himself to break down. He'd already visited the site again, after having done a sweep of the grounds for her scent, letting out the most pitiful of howls before leaving to inform the others.

Professional hunter. Trained to track and stalk since he was four. And yet he couldn't see what was right in front of him.

What other hope could she have? If the two ghosts who had the ability to smell couldn't detect her then what...

"Fight."

It's not the creature who speaks. It only knows one word, the same one it's been repeating possessively in her ear for the past eight hours.

That voice. It can't be.

"Darling girl, you have to fight."

Silver blinked, and there she was. Translucent, image flickering like a candle ready to be blown out by the wind. But it's her.

"Mary?"

Her own voice echoes out from her mind, her lips still sealed by the demon.

"How...How can you be here?" It wasn't possible. Robin said that no one ever came back after they moved on.

The older woman smiled, reaching out to cup her cheek, past the firm claws of the monster. Her calloused but warm and tender touch contrasted with the cold moisture of the hands imprisoning her within the tree.

"I's promised you, didn't Is? I dids say I woulds not leave you alone. Don't you recalls?"

Of course she did. Every night, whenever she looked up at the stars, to her star. She remembered that promise.

"But you did. You left me." And here she was, alone and trapped.

"No, little'en. Just because you cans no longer sees me, don't mean I be not with you, always. You should know that." That cheeky twinkle lifted the corners of her ashen lips; "Just look at yourself. The livings can no longer look upon yous, yet you doth walk beside them, making me proud by cursing the menfolk."

Silver wished she had the ability to nod. The creature didn't seem to acknowledge Mary's visitation, if it saw her at all. But it still held on tight, constricting her slim body like a hungry Boa.

"And do you doubt the presence of your heathen gods because they be invisibles?"

No. She doubted them when they failed to hear her prayers and left her to endure shit like this.

Unless...this was them answering her.

"If you're really here...then help me. Please." If it was really Mary, her Mary, then there would be no power on heaven or earth or beyond that would stop her from trying.

"I can't get you out, lovely." She said, apologetic.

Silver whimpered internally. She knew it. She knew it wasn't real.

The creature snarls, chilled air wafting against her ear.

"Mine. Mine."

"The only one who can get yous out...is you." Mary told her. "Yous has to fight."

Fight? How the fuck can she fight?!

She can't even move her pinky finger. She can't even utter the smallest squeak. She's fucking useless!

"Now you listens to me, Silver Ravenstar." Mary's tone hardened, as if she'd heard every bit of Silver's self-loathing rant without a word being spoken; "You wills not think of yourself as useless, be that understood?! You is free to choose whatever name you wish to carry, but to me you is as my own child. You is Silver Guppy. And I will nots have you giving up and letting some slimey toe rag of a demon keep you in the dark!"

Silver Guppy. The very name struck a match deep within her. It sounded ridiculous and adorable. A pretty fish.

But that's all she may as well be now, speared on the hook of this creature.

"But how can I fight him?! Tell me!"

"Tosh and flaps, little'en. I thought you be a witch!"

She is. Or was. But it's not as if she has the ability to cast a spell by decorating a candle or drawing a sygil or burning incense. Fuck, she should have asked Alison to pour salt around her bed, at the least.

"You once told me that magic be nought but prayer 'cept 'cooler'. You don't need any wands or cauldrons or idols." Mary pressed her fingers to the pentacle on her neck; "All that ye need is inside you, darlin'. We might nots share blood, but that fire that burned within me is in you too. Pray, believe, whatever you needs. But you find that power and you weild it with all your strength."

As Mary's image began to fade all the more, Silver felt another tear fall.

"Are you...just in my head?" She wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer.

Mary smiled; "If that be the truth, then so is he. Do with that what ye will, daughter o' mine."

Mary dissolved before her. Through the tiny hollow of tree, her friends remained sitting in silence, oblivious to her struggle for her afterlife. Her freedom.

One finger slipped between her lips and met her teeth.

"Mine..." It whispered again.

Silver bit down on its slimey digit. No fucking way. It released a shriek of pain, inaudible to her friends. All in her head. Just a dream.

She was still asleep.

"Leave me the fuck ALONE!" She visualised that magic, that energy granted to all women by the Goddess, as a beacon within her chest. Its heavenly light threw the creature off of her, its fragile skin far too sensitive to bear the holy brightness.

Free from its hold, Silver inhaled a deep breath.

Artemis, Eos, Athena, Hera, Hecate, Demeter, Hestia, Persephone, Nyx, Circe, Aphrodite, Eris, Gaia...

She chanted the names within her without rhyme or pattern, calling upon each or their gifts and strengths, petitioning them to look down upon her and lend their powers to her. Just for a second. Just for one tiny moment.

That's all she would need.

Fight, Mary's voice repeated in her head, fight. Free yourself, before he comes back. Don't give him a chance. Don't let him win.

Already, in the corner of her mind, she can feel the hairs on her neck rise up. The creature is skuttling back towards her, ready to pounce. Ready to trap her once more. This time forever.

Fight. Fight, Silver Guppy, fight!

Amy thought the sound to be another of Kitty's sobs at first. A tiny, high-pitched squeak.

But when she looked up at her friend, her sobs seemed to have subsided, her devastated face rather still as she rubbed Amy's back. And then it came again. Behind her.

"What is that? Did you hear it?" She frowned, looking up at the tree.

"Probably a mouse or a squirrel." Kitty answered.

Not even the suggestion of a squirrel to chase piqued Robin's interest.

It hadn't sounded like an animal to Amy. She sniffed again, moving closer to the tree.

The scent was stronger there than the pillow.

Salt hung in the air around the trunk as thick as the ocean breeze.

"...She's in the tree."

"What?" Captain asked, all of them frowning at her. Even Robin looked up.

Were they deaf?

"She's in the fucking tree!" Amy repeated.

"No...No, tree living thing. Ghost can't be inside, it be too painful, like when human walk through-." Robin tried to explain, because there's no way he would have missed something so blatantly obvious.

"Painful but not impossible?! Like, if someone wanted to be a complete masochist, they could try hiding inside the body of a living thing? Man or animal or plant?!" Amy asked, rounding on the caveman.

Everyone turned their heads on him for an answer.

"Well...guess so, but...how would Moonah girl get inside tree when she no wake?"

"Maybe someone fucking moved her, it doesn't matter!"

She slid off the bed and stood before the tree. It would be uncomfortable, just to test this theory out. But a few moments of intense nausea would be worth it, a thousand times over, if she happened to be right.

"Silver? Dude, are you in there?"

Silence.

And then, again, the smallest of cries. A single note cut through the air.

Peering into the tiny hollow, barely larger than a single eye, she caught the glimmer of an unnatural sapphire iris, shining with tears.

"Shit." She threw her hands forward, into the tree bark.

"Amy!" Humphrey called out.

They all darted forward, either to stop or to help, she didn't care. Gagging, stomach churning painfully, she resisted the urge to pull back as her hands felt the thin fabric of a familiar overshirt.

"There you are." She sighed, discomfort conquered by relief, "She's here! Guys, she's here!"

A suddenly reanimated Robin all but shoved her aside and into Humphrey's arms as he practically dove into the tree, wrapping his arms around the body of the girl within and hauling her out.

He knelt to the ground with her immobile form cradled in his arms. The emotions he'd been keeping a tight lid on before seemed to erupt with this twist of fate as he beheld her, paws caressing her face. Amy and Kitty moved down on the floor with him, gazing over the friend they thought they'd lost.

Those blue eyes stared up at them without blinking. Skin paler than normal. Were it not for the tremble of her bottom lip and the tiny cries she was uttering, tears still leaking from eyes, she would resemble a corpse.

"Oh, sweetheart! You're here! You're all right!" Kitty beamed, reaching to touch her hair, to check she wasn't a figment of their imagination. "Wait...she's not all right. Why isn't she moving?"

Amy leaned in a little, studying her unfocused gaze. Her short, shallow breaths.

"Silver. Mate, if you can hear me, blink once for me, yeah? Can you do that?"

Those pupils darted towards her.

With great effort, her friend just about managed to shut her eyelids, only for a brief moment before they snapped open again.

"I think it’s sleep paralysis." She said.

They all stared at her as if they'd never heard such a thing. To be fair, Amy was only aware because of a classmate who suffered from them experienced one while they were on a school trip. It had freaked out the whole form group as they thought she'd died in her sleep.

"It's kinda like sleepwalking except the opposite. You're kinda half awake, half asleep, but instead of moving around, you just...can't move, I guess." She wasn't exactly an expert; "Girl I knew said she also saw a lot of freaky shit when it happened. Like waking nightmares."

"That's why she was screaming before Robin found her." Kitty concluded, "Do you think she's still seeing them now?"

"I dunno. Maybe." She knew it wasn't wise under normal circumstances to touch someone when sleep walking or having some kind of night terror.

But these were hardly normal circumstances, as she sat in the woods with a Georgian, a WWII soldier, her adopted Tudor dad and a Neo-Pagan from the early naughties.

She squeezed Silver's hand tight.

"We're here, dude. We've got you, okay?" Amy reassured her. "You're not alone."

Another squeak, tears leaking as Silver's eyes focused on Amy. There was a tiny strain in the corners of her lips. Was she trying to smile?

Kitty stroked her hair back; "Just relax, poppet. Nothing can hurt you now. We'll look after you."

"When we're not assuming you've left us, that is." Amy muttered, apologetic, giving Robin a side eye.

The caveman seemed too overwhelmed with guilt to respond. He was still gazing at the girl in his arms as if struggling to believe she was really there.

"Has this ever happened before, Robin?" Captain asked.

The caveman shook his mane; "...She only have nightmare on new moonah. Never go on walkeys. Never wake up, not even little bit..." His voice broke with sorrow.

"New moon? You mean this happens every month?!" Amy frowned.

Robin then explained the rhythmic nature of the moon's connection to Silver as she slept and how the lack of its reflected glow stopped the comfort of her usually pleasant lucid dreams.

Amy punched him in the shoulder.

"AND YOU DIDN'T THINK TO TELL ME THIS BEFORE?!"

"It my respons-a-billy, Stompy! My promise to her, to Mary!" He defended, "One night, just one, I be an hour late-."

"Well maybe if you ditched the fucking savior complex and stopped treating me and Kitty like dumb kids, we'd have been able to help and be there for her!"

"Everyone, please, hush! Let's not do this now, look at her." Kitty reasoned, nodding to Silver's pained expression.

Amy felt Humphrey's hand squeeze her shoulder as he stood behind her. She looked to Robin and the two nodded in a truce.

"Sorry, mate. It's not exactly helping you to chill out, is it?" She smiled, giving her hand another squeeze.

Silver could only hum slightly.

Robin leaned in to press his forehead to hers; "Me so sorry, my Moonah girl. Robin big sorry."

Amy could feel the tension in Silver's fingers against hers start to loosen, her ramrod body beginning to go limp in Robin's arms.

"That's it, sweetheart." Kitty soothed, noticing the change; "Go back to sleep. Let this all just be a bad dream."

Silver's head rolled into Robin's furs as he held her close to his chest, her eyelids falling naturally, the muscles starting to slacken in her cheeks as the panic melted away. With any luck, she wouldn't remember any of this, just as she always claimed her dreams became a jumbled mess of emotions upon waking.

They waited a few moments, the three of them sitting in silence, cradling her, an obscure recreation of Michaelangelo's Pieta, while Cap and Humphrey watched on. A beam from the early morning sun bathed them in a soft glow while the birds sang above them. Silver's face softened into its familiar look of slumbering contentment.

Despite the tranquility of the current scene, Amy came to a decision.

"How long does a new moon last?" She asked.

"Few nights. It usually only middle one she get really bad, but sometimes more." Robin explained, quietly.

"Then she's sleeping in the room with us." Amy stated, cutting Robin off before he could object; "If the moon isn't around to protect her, then she needs to be with her friends, where we can check on her and make sure she's safe and be close if she needs us."

She turned to the others, throwing her hands up.

"That make sense to the rest of you?"

They all nodded. Had they needed her there to state the obvious? They really were hopeless. No wonder Alison described her life with them as a teacher trying to control a class of idiots.

"Good. Bring her inside then, Robin. We can take her back when the moon is waxing again."

"And she never have to know?" He asked.

"Oh no, she'll know. I'm telling her once she wakes up and if she's pissed off, she can have a go at me all she wants. But we're not doing this secrecy bullshit anymore."

She'd come close to losing her best friend tonight because of one dumb caveman wanting to keep some sacred duty all to himself.

Robin nodded, humbled, and rose to his feet with Silver fast asleep in his arms.

As they returned to the house, Humphrey nudged Amy's side.

"That's my girl. You proper saved the day, didn't you."

"Helps to have more than one braincell than the rest of you."

"Cheeky." Humphrey smiled, putting his arm around her.

She threw a glance back at Silver, that niggle of worry poisoning her relief. Had she gone into the tree on her own? Or had something taken her there? Whichever the case, no fucking way was she going to leave her friend alone in the dark.

[eriexplosion]

TIME TO MEET UP WITH LIZARD WIFE.

The fact that Crosshair's wrist is apparently even remotely near a small girls wrist size is hilarious to me. Eat more you skinny creature your limbs are only slightly bigger than a child's. He does say it's not an exact fit but. Close enough to work.

Wrecker doing Gonky lifts in the background is wholesome.

"The Jedi who are all dead?" is still the most 0-100 response, good job on your immediate escalation Tech. He's correct but damn.

LIZARD WIFE LIZARD WIFE

Anyway in case it wasn't clear I am extremely Pro-Cid. I love her even though she has committed crimes and betrayals. She looked really sad while doing it you see.

Tech's COMPLETE distaste for this place is hilarious. MAYBE he was ARRESTED for VIOLATING COUNTLESS HEALTH CODE REGULATIONS. It doesn't look that bad but he is Offended.

Love Omega just instantly tuning into the fact that Cid is engaged in the ancient art of 'straight up lying' while in the background everyone else discusses what their next move is if this isn't Cid's place like they didn't just walk under a big glowing sign that says "Cid's"

God bless them all

Deadly looking Crossbow: Exists

Omega: This is? for me to touch?

Nice foreshadowing to her actually getting a hold of a bow though.

I just love Cid's office full of concerning objects like said Crossbow, a mounted clone trooper helmet, and what looks distressingly like a wookiee pelt on the back of the chair. If Cid can do one thing it's design an office.

Echo is so deeply horrified by the concept of becoming a mercenary. They really were setting up the split early, it was obvious from the start that Echo wasn't going to run with this forever. It goes against everything they ARE.

Wrecker and Omega when Cid calls her the brains of the operation LOL. I love them.

Cid I love u but don't be mean to Wrecker in particular he's an angel and we're glad he's here.

The 'what's a slave trader' conversation is minorly annoying still because 'people can be sold' Omega let me tell you a story about THE ENTIRE BASIS OF THE KAMINOAN ECONOMY. Through Echo's whole explanation I'm sitting here going YOU. THAT IS YOU. YOU ARE THE PROPERTY THAT WAS BOUGHT AND SOLD AND NO ONE IS MENTIONING IT. There are points where it feels like they're just straight up not allowed to imply that while the Empire was WORSE for clones, the Republic was also very bad.

Another great moment though that shows how much Echo already doesn't fit this is when Tech helpfully fills in AS WELL AS EARN A DECENT AMOUNT OF CREDITS ONCE THE JOB IS COMPLETE and Echo sounds so damn downtrodden saying 'yeah, that too' they want to be doing good things for the sake of it not worrying about if it's going to get them paid. Tech meanwhile seems more like. You do a good thing (rescue a child) AND you get a good thing in return (the ability to eat regularly) what's there to be upset about?

Old Ord Mantell is goregoussssss

Hunter like 'I'm going to do a good job of parenting and make Omega stay with the ship' and then NOTHING HAPPENS AS PLANNED.

Truly insane that Echo was assigned to be the eyes in the sky, Echo you have one arm go climb that building right now, do it. I know they're used to having Crosshair to do this but surely secondary duty should fall on ANYONE BUT THE ONE WHO DOESN'T HAVE TWO HANDS.

Echo should by all accounts be severely injured from that fall, almost like people in Star Wars don't take fall damage.

Yes I'm going to be thinking about Tech through every one of these so SUE ME. IF THEY DIDN'T WANT ME THINKING ABOUT IT THEY SHOULD STOP SHOWING ME HIM FALLING.

Anyway after the fiasco in Cut & Run and this it is clear that losing Crosshair dramatically decreased the batch's fighting ability, almost like the family needs to be complete to truly thrive.

"I have my BEST PEOPLE (some guys and a child I met five minutes ago) ON IT"

Every food in TBB is simply some form of cylinder.

Something so sweetly domestic about Omega and Gonky on the ship she's just chilling with the family doggo who is actually a half charged brick of a droid.

Also to be fair to Omega. This time she TRIED to just stay on the ship like she was told.

I love when my faves are endangered so the entire batch being captured by slave traders is like catnip to me. Would watch a whole arc about this, I want them constantly getting hurt to protect each other please. My favorite narrative.

Once again Tech is the one to spot Omega clearly he should have been sent up the tower to be the eye in the sky.

Hunter trying to convince her NOT TO COME RESCUE THEM by insistingly shaking his head. You should already know that won't do ANYTHING Hunter.

This guys design and menacing demeanor go so hard for NO reason he's in it for like two and a half minutes tops.

Also regarding this scene, Echo going with 'the Republic outlawed slavery' is some real 'what do you mean you're being murdered that's illegal they can't do that' energy.

Leading Omega along where she needs to go via loud boasting is a great idea though.

"If you do not comply, the person next to you will pay the price" is a TERRIFYING LINE and it is happening ENTIRELY offscreen and I only know he says it because of the subtitles. More peril please.

MUCHI. GREAT HOW NOTHING BAD HAPPENS TO HER IN THE ORIGINAL TRILOGY RIGHT :'D

Still one of the more attractive things Hunter's ever done and I wish we could see his face for it, you know the stare is INTENSE.

Love Wrecker's tiny thumbs up

The moment of sending Muchi off is cute, GREAT HOW NOTHING BAD HAPPENS TO MUCHI R I G H T

The last bit with Cid <3 my girl I just love a crime grandma okay, I love her. She had no reason to make life that difficult for them she just did it Because. Something is wrong with her <3

[askaniritual]

I don't know anything about the locked tomb, but if you feel up to giving enough context I would love to hear about how palamedes is Sollux.

tumblr should implement some kind of feature that cuts off my access to the app after ive had 2 drinks but! its the next morning and i still want to talk about this so let's go:

tamsyn muir, author of the locked tomb series, was what the kids call a BNF (or big name fan) in the homestuck fandom in the early 2010s, publishing fic under the ao3 username "urbanAnchorite (t_ZM)"

people with more historical knowledge of the fandom than myself have written extensively about the many similarities between the world presented in the locked tomb and muir's fic, particularly her novel length story The Serendipity Gospels, the plot and premise of which clearly inspired the second novel in the locked tomb series, Harrow the Ninth*

some other (noncomprehensive) similarities between the world of the locked tomb and homestuck include

the two main characters each have six letters in their first names, much like the trolls in homestuck

one of the main characters is a part of a cult that constantly wears black and white face paint (in the books it's a skull design instead of clown paint)

the all-powerful godking of the universe is named John

much of the plot of the second novel revolves around the existence of mysterious lovecraftian monsters with the power to destroy the universe

so. we have established that a) tamsyn muir was active in the homestuck fandom and that b) she brought elements of her homestuck fic into the locked tomb series. now, i understand that simply being inspired by lore does not mean that every character in the locked tomb series has a 1:1 homestuck character equivalent and that is true! ianthe for example bears some similarities to the way that gamzee is characterized in the serendipity gospels, but i wouldn't say that ianthe is supposed to be a gamzee equivalent.

however, now we will introduce paraTactician. paraTactician was another BNF in the homestuck fandom. we know that ms muir and paraTactician wrote fic together, and that paraTactician was especially focused on Sollux as a character. In the author's notes of The Last Hearing of Gamzee Makara, ms. muir says: "Due gratefulness to paraTactician, who is like Cheat Mode for what Sollux is thinking or doing at any given time". ms. muir also credits paraTactician in the dedication of gideon the ninth, the first book in the series.

palamedes sextus in the locked tomb is introduced as a nerdy, bookish guy who is an extremely smart, powerful necromancer who wears glasses and is said to have striking eyes. also, he's in love with a princess**. based on all this, i posit that his character in the locked tomb is based on the character of sollux captor.

the easiest argument to make against this is that palamedes' characterization in the locked tomb is fairly different from what i would call the popular sollux characterization in homestuck fic from that era. palamedes is kinder, less crude, less emotional overall, and more of an academic than a gamer. so this is the part where maybe i will start losing people because it definitely relies on a subjective reading of the text and trying to provide "evidence" for this would require doing a close reading of palamedes' characterization in the books as well as sollux's characterization in muir and paraTactician's total body of work.

however, i maintain that if you read their fic, you notice a characterization of sollux that trends in exactly that direction: more focus on intelligence, on absolute dedication to intellectual pursuits over physical being, on a kind of razor-edged wit that creates a sharp distinction between people who are smart enough to speak to him and people who aren't, and a kind of iron-clad belief in doing what's right. if this post wasn't already way way way too long i would talk about the pale solrezi of it all but we don't have time to get into all that.

so to conclude, palamedes is sollux in that he was inspired by the character of sollux captor from homestuck, however palamedes is also not sollux because he doesn't actually bear that many similarities to the character from the comic itself, but is instead heavily inspired by the version of sollux that ms muir and paraTactician wrote in the homestuck fanfiction they were publishing at the time.

also. read the vienna game it's very good.

-----

*this is not a criticism or a critique of either the book or the fic, its just like. an obvious fact and also im not implying that the locked tomb is Literally homestuck fanfiction, there is a significant amount of original worldbuilding in the serendipity gospels that in no way makes HtN a derivative work

**i guess princess-coded would be a more accurate description? she’s important within her house but not exactly royalty i guess

[rolotouto]

A video with most (not all, yet) of Rolo's lines in Lost Stories. Translation below.

The first two lines are heard during the log-in screens, of which there are two variations (EDIT: 3rd one in the next post!). For the 1st day log-in (which only happens once and I couldn't record as clearly, I'm sorry!!):

・Brother and everyone from the Student Council are really happy that you have returned to the Academy… and me too, of course…

The slower way in which he says ‘mochiron, boku mo’… Thank you Daichuu ♥ And the next log-in line is repeated every day for 7 more days: ・It seems that you haven’t been coming to the Academy much. Is there anything troubling you? If that’s the case, would you like me to listen to you? Somewhere where nobody will bother us, calmly…

An alternative translation of this line would be: "Ever heard about Rai? Of course not, I made sure nobody will ever hear about him. I say this for no particular reason *smiles*."

After that, I've recorded two lines which aren't included in the character archive, for some reason. They are the ones you get when you haven't collected your presents in the Present Box or in the Mission screen, respectively: ・It seems that something has arrived in the present box. Will you check it?

・If you have completed a request, you should report it. And next comes the character archive, which lets you listen to the rest of his Home lines in order (and some Battle ones as well): ・(If you log in from 4 to 6:59 [Japan time]) Eh? You're so early! I just happened to wake up early by chance. I came outside because I wanted to take a breath of fresh air. ・(From 7 to 10:59) Good morning. You still look sleepy. Did you stay up late last night? ・(From 11 to 15:59) Have you seen Brother? Since Rivalz-san isn't here either, I wonder if it's chess gambling again... ・(From 16 to 18:59) I always have dinner with Brother. Therefore, I will excuse myself. ・(From 19 to 23:59) Eh? Is there something wrong for you to be here so late? I'm taking a post-dinner walk. I wanted to do some thinking. ・(From 00 to 3:59) So you are still awake. If you don't mind sharing, could you tell me what you're doing staying up this late?

The following lines can appear anytime, regardless of the hour: ・After the Black Rebellion, you were absent from school for quite a long time. Is there a specific reason for your sudden return?

・Ah... Judging from her face, President Milly has come up with something again. This school has many unpredictable events, so the Student Council work is really tough.

・Rivalz-san and the Student Council president sometimes tease me about Shirley-san. Saying "she's your big sis" and such... I don't understand.

The way he adds "ne" at the end implies that he assumes Mario/Maya agrees with him in that Rivalz and Milly aren't making any sense. I love how unable he is to not react to jokes with a "this is so pointless" face. ♥ ・Brother... The other day he skipped class again, and the teacher got angry with him. I'm worried about his credits, but it seems that he has already done all the calculations needed in that regard.

・The student council members are so attentive to just anyone, aren't they...? They are kind even to me... I wonder why.

That's probably my favorite line, which requires you to have gained his full Trust (up to level 5) in order to be unlocked. Rolo's confusion over why people would treat him nicely for no reason is exactly how I interpret his perception of others outside of his relationship with Lelouch: he can recognize their kindness, but finds it so bewildering that he can't appreciate it for what it is. In Turn 19.02, he displayed fascination at the idea of family members showing kindness to each other without any ulterior motives, and I've always believed that Rolo simply didn't live long enough to have the opportunity to grasp that "family" isn't the only place where giving and receiving kindness exists. I see him voicing the question "I wonder why" with that sad face as another sign that he really wanted to understand human bonding and that, with a little more time and less gaslighting from Lelouch, he had all the potential to become as grateful and indebted to others' good treatment as he was to the love he received from Lelouch.

・Brother is my only family. If you ask the members of the Student Council, I'm sure they will tell you all sorts of stories about me and Brother.

"Tada hitori no" means that his family consists of a single person, so what's up with the parents Lelouch referred to in Turn 19.02? Has that being retconned as well and now Lelouch's altered memories don't include any parents? Then again, even in Turn 19.02 Lelouch claimed that Rolo and him were always "like a family of just the two of us", so... I guess nothing has been retconned and these brothers were always meant to be parent-ignoring-brocons even in the canon created by Charles.

・You and Brother do get along well... Who approached whom first? Was there any particular event that brought you close?

・It's only natural to want to know what kind of people your brother interacts with and what kind of relationships he has, isn't it? I mean, he's family.

I guess this can be read as Rolo already showing possessive signs, or maybe not necessarily that, and he just wants to know as much as possible about Mario/Maya because he suspects him/her.

・Could it be that you are nervous because it's been a while since you came to school? You looking at me with such probing eyes… What's going on?・On the days you don't come to school, you are actually carrying out some mission under a prominent figure from Britannia... Just kidding. Do I watch too much TV?

Even though this sounds like Rolo just carelessly revealed his own identity, I'm sure he said that to test Mario/Maya and analyze his/her reaction on purpose. Even when you get his Trust to max level, he doesn't actually trust you at all (unlike the Dearness levels in GeaGene), as you will see when I post his Trust leveling up lines... By the way, everything was in polite Japanese so far, since Rolo uses polite speech with pretty much everyone other than Lelouch. After that, there's a bunch of short lines which were already translated in this previous post. You will notice I'm missing one, which is unlocked when you get his Awaken stats to level 15, but that will probably take me some time...

Next, some of his lines during battles: ・(Launch into battle) Come on, let's go. ・(Battle start 1) You are getting in the way of my mission. ・(Battle start 2) I will have you removed. ・(Deployment 1) Leave it to me. ・(Deployment 2) I won't let you get away. ・(Retreat 1) I will retreat temporarily! ・(Retreat 2) I let my guard down... ・(KMF skill 1) You can't defeat me. ・(KMF skill 2) I will have you die! ・(KMF skill: finishing blow) Goodbye. And lastly, his lines when you finish the battle, which change depending on the score you obtained: ・(Result S) Our goal was achieved with ease. Well, it's only natural. After all, failure is not allowed. He so learned that at the Order... ・(Result A) It went well. There were minor irregularities, but we managed to handle somehow. ・(Result B) It was a close call. It doesn't change the fact that we won, so that's fine, but next time let's have a bigger margin of victory. He, like the rest of the characters, has some month-exclusive home voice lines as well, but I will wait until I get more of those before I post them (they are not available in the archive, meaning you can't hear them until the month changes in real life). And those are the translations for this post. I'm not done with everything, but ahh, I love this! This Rolo feels so 2008ish to me. It reminds me of playing Banjou no Geass Gekijou and being excited to get all the Rolo dialogue over 15 years ago... Man, GeaGene just couldn't compete.

[bettsfic]

craft essay a day #10

i can't believe my highlighter ran out of ink. anyway, back to the sweet safety of a beginner essay.

“Research in Fiction” by Angela Barrett, The Writer’s Notebook II: Craft Essays from Tin House

beginner | intermediate | advanced | masterclass 

filed under: process, research, meaning making

summary

Barrett begins the essay by recounting a situation she seems to think is widely experienced but has never once happened to me: falling so far down a well of research for a story that you lose sight of the project and/or fill the story with all the research you learned, neglecting the characters.

but i do know there are plenty of writers out there who basically live in research wells so i definitely get what she's saying.

"I hate how dangerous research can be for our work. It's always easier, and often more fun, to dive into books and photos and the shark-filled depths of the online world than to write."

again, i do not find research easier than writing. i would always rather be writing than researching. so, this essay is probably not for me, although i would love to read an essay whose point is "maybe at least read the wikipedia article? you fool?"

the very big point she is making (and a great point it is) is that when you research for fiction, you're not invoking the facts of a time or place or trade, but translating those facts into a lived experience that will shape and affect your characters.

"What is the research for? Think about it like this: research is simply a way of understanding what our characters understand."

she goes on to point out that Tolstoy started writing War and Peace when he was thirty-five. today, many of us assume he was writing about his own time, but actually he was writing from several decades later. Barrett points out that for those of us around his age, it would be like writing about World War II.

she concludes with an amendment to writing what you know:

"A more generous, more useful interpretation of the phrase ['write what you know'] is that we should write about what we know, however we come to know it, whether by vision or sensual experience or reading or conversation or passionate imagining."

why did the editor bother keeping the Johnston essay, when Barrett more or less said what he was trying to say in a single paragraph, and more cogently?

my thoughts

when it comes to research for fiction, the most helpful thing i can suggest is developing the skill to name what you don't yet know, but know could be known.

let's take banking, for example. because i worked at a bank for ten years, i know a lot about finance and therefore i know what kinds of conflicts can develop for characters in that setting, and how it might inform their perspectives or identities or choices. i know things that can't be researched because trade secret agreements keep anyone from writing nonfiction on the inner workings of a financial institution.

because i know banking so well, i can apply the framework of my knowledge to other topics and use that framework to begin my research.

for example:

at the bank, every morning i had to run the daily insufficient funds report. the NSF report exists to decide whether or not the bank will pay or bounce checks for funds that aren't available in someone's account. hence, insufficient funds report. when you write a check and you don't have enough money in your account to pay it, a real human person decides what to do about it.

twenty bucks? not a problem. you pay it, you move on. but i was in business and that meant i was paying sometimes thousands of payroll checks for a company that didn't have the funds to pay them. paying insufficient funds means giving the customer a line of credit that has no promissory note or collateral to secure it, which means there's no guarantee the bank will get back its funds.

and yet, if i don't pay it, thousands of people won't get their paycheck.

that's an external conflict that can only happen in this setting, with internal repercussions and potentially personal consequences for your character. (in reality, i had to obtain a lot of approvals, but that's less of an interesting conflict; fictionalizing means fudging things sometimes for the sake of being interesting.)

this has other implications, too. when you make a debit card transaction, for example, the process of the bank choosing to pay or not pay must happen automatically, without a real human person making that decision. before 2013ish, most banks had a policy that debit card transactions would always be paid, regardless of how much money was in the account.

this was a perfect storm: customers could either overdraw their account and accumulate a massive number of fees ($38 at the time for a single overdraw, even one penny over), or they could open an overdraft line of credit. most people don't have good enough credit to open an overdraft line of credit, which meant people had to overdraft. a few banks had the courtesy of allowing you to dip into your savings for overdrafting. but not many.

and banks could say this was a good thing: you'll never get your card declined! we'll pay any purchase! (evil laughter)

then during the Obama administration, somebody finally decided that was super shitty and developed Reg E which forced banks to allow customers to opt in or out of overdrafting on debit card transactions. so finally you could go into a bank and say, "i want to opt out of overdraft," which means that on one hand, if you don't have the funds in your account, your card will get declined, potentially leaving you in a bad situation with whatever you're trying to purchase; but you'll never have to pay $38 for overdrawing your account by a nickel.

whew. okay. so here, as myself, i have an annoying daily situation which has greater historical and social context. and as a researcher writing about, say, a mechanic, i can begin my research by asking, what's a mechanic's equivalent NSF report? what's the annoying thing they have to do every morning when they clock in? and maybe also, what's something they have to do that has greater personal, social, and maybe political consequences? a mechanic works on your car, and that means your safety as a driver is in their hands. that means there are regulations to consider, the history of the safety of motor vehicles and the ways cars have changed. how do all those much bigger things influence the work of your character? are they the type of mechanic who keeps that in mind, or maybe they used to but they're only going through the motions, allowing for the potential for error and therefore danger? or do they just not give a shit about that kind of thing?

i once gave a writer feedback on their story about a clown. and my question was, but what about the clown's clown friends? the writer didn't know what to say to that. i said, well i know clowns are very much about community. clowns are generally pretty proud of being clowns. so this clown would likely be affected by his status in the community of clowns in his area. he would either be in his community, and that would create a certain conflict; or he'd be an outsider of his community, and that would create a different conflict. but the point is, you the writer acknowledge an understanding of the greater life of clowns.

Barrett assumes an approach: a writer does research and then applies that research to the experience of their characters. i'm suggesting an alternative: a writer begins with the consideration of their characters and tailors their research to that experience.

good research begins with the understanding that the foundation of the human experience is that we are inwardly affected by our outward reality, and by acknowledging that, you can develop a framework in which to fill in the gaps of your knowledge by targeting what you know you don't know.

or, to put it more simply, you can always begin research with one question: what's the most annoying part of your character's day?

craft essay a day tag | cross-posted on AO3 | ask me something

[astriiformes]

16 for the writing meme?

16 - How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

If this is ideas + existing WIPs I haven't published yet, then I can come up with a solid 11 or 12 easily, because I just live like this.

One of the ones I've been thinking about again after getting to see a friend perform Shakespeare a few weeks ago is the Locked Tomb community theater AU, aka Gideon and Harrow both independently get roped into the most chaotic local production of Hamlet ever, with plenty of modern and college AU-type woes and side-plots for the characters to tackle at the same time. I still really want to write this one -- a fun opportunity to mess around with a big ensemble cast of characters I'd love to try my hand at writing, a love letter to Shakespeare's work, and a great opportunity to toy with weaving together themes from two different works of fiction in interesting ways, all bundled into one.

I will grace you all with a very short excerpt from the draft I have for that one, since I actually don't think I've posted any Locked Tomb fic snippets before:

“Pal,” Gideoen said, shoving her recently-returned exam in the TA’s face and shaking it around a little for good measure.“Friend, buddy, pa-- my guy. I’m gonna fucking fail.” Palamedes sighed – with far more world-weariness than he should have been allowed, as both someone barely older than she was and the person whose grade wasn’t on the fucking line at the moment -- and pushed his glasses up his nose, looking a little out of sorts from all the yanking. “I did try to persuade him to at least give you partial credit on question nine,” he said. “While it isn’t strictly accurate to say Galileo ‘gave the middle finger’ to the Roman Inquisition, it’s got something approximating the right spirit, and on account of having seen it, I’ll admit thought it was rather funn--” “—Hang on, back up. Seen what?” “His middle finger,” Palamedes replied – simply, as if that wasn’t a totally insane thing to say. “They’ve got it on display in the Museo Galileo, in, ironically enough, something a bit like a reliquary.” “That is fucked-up,” Gideon said, momentarily distracted from her own agonies by something much better – someone else’s agonies. “Is it just like bones now? Dead scientist bones?” “You know, if you care so much about scientist bones you could have treated mine a little kinder. I think I’ve got a bruise forming.”

[andtheyweresiblings]

Hii! hope you are doing well!

I was just casually stopping by your blog because usually notifications come to me when I'm in the office and then I miss them, so I'm happy to see that you're still responding asks and reblogging art. Very nice art by the way!

My heart soared when I saw that you had reblogged the minicomic of one of my favorite writers who I didn't even know they had a blog on tumblr. Just fantastic!

I'm writing to you now taking advantage of mentioning the ship brumira and the few forces to concretize projects about them despite all the ideas that may exist in one's head. Totally understandable.

So I came here to contribute a little bit with an idea that had been on my mind since I first saw this pair on the screen. It may not be an inherently romantic act, and while that's not really the ultimate goal of this action, I consider it a great display of affection, trust and interest that one can feel towards someone, romantic partner or not.

The idea came spontaneously in me when I saw the infamous post-credits scene where Mirabel and Bruno are contemplating the stars, with nothing but each other's company (and rats). As simple, as tender and as intimate as that.

I find it so easy to believe that even though the Madrigals welcomed Bruno with open arms, recognized Mirabel as a talented person capable of doing what she set out to do, and the ending of the film turned out as hopeful as only a di$ney ending can be, I have no doubt that there is still a long way to go for healing.

I think about how even though Bruno and Mirabel have regained their place in the family and I don't doubt that they feel safe and loved at Casita, they both still seek each other out (consciously or not) because they find refuge in each other's company or presence when the world starts to feel too much and they just want to be by the side of someone who doesn't judge them and understands them. Maybe in the beginning they were just looking for a little sympathy from the other.

They don't know how it started, it just happened. One day they were the last ones to get up from the table after dinner because they were so immersed in each other's conversation that they lost track of time. Or maybe the next time, when it was their turn to do the market shopping and they chatted so pleasantly the whole way there that by the time they realized it, they were already at the doors of Casita with a pile of shopping bags. Or the time after that, when Bruno wanted to present a play from the rat theater to the family and stayed up late at night making the costumes for the actors and designing the scenery with Mirabel by his side. Or surely it was the time when Bruno had a panic attack because he again had a bad vision of some villager and Mirabel was there. At that moment words were unnecessary and her mere presence was enough to comfort him.

By the time they figured it out, they had these daytime or nighttime outings where they would spend time catching up on what the other had been up to or simply enjoying the silence while reveling in the wonderful view that only Encanto could offer.

But there were also darker times.

Nights when it was impossible to fall asleep, either because of something that had happened to them that day and they could not stop thinking about it or some nightmare in which, despite their best efforts to tell themselves that none of that was real, that cruel scene of their dreams kept repeating itself every time they closed their eyes.

So, as a last resort, they wandered around Casita until they found some place where they could find some consolation. And either by coincidence, a curious way of helping on the part of Casita, or because the restless soul of one called to the other, both ended up coinciding.

So many times it happened that both offered their respective rooms as a sort of safe house for such situations. It didn't matter what time it was or if they had had a misunderstanding with each other, either had permission to enter the other's room and find a place in their bed.

This was different for both of them of course.

While Mirabel would knock on the door and if she received no answer, either because Bruno was asleep or didn't hear her, she would enter with a blanket under her arm and lie down on the place on the bed that Bruno usually left free. When he noticed her presence in his bed, he would put a pillow between them, kiss her forehead and say a soft "good night", if she was just looking for a place to rest. But, if she wanted to talk to him about what was bothering her then he'd prepare a couple of cups of tea, herbs or coffee and stay with her until exhaustion overcame them both and they would end up in each other's arms until dawn.

On the other hand, Bruno didn't even dare to knock on Mirabel's door the first times. He was just a crestfallen figure, standing in the middle of the hallway with his fist slightly raised. Too worried about interrupting his niece's sleep just because he couldn't get his own, so he retraced his steps back to his room, sadder than before.

That is, until one day, Casita decided it'd had enough.

It threw open the bedroom door, moved the tiles under his feet until he almost fell on Mirabel's bed and closed the door again. Bruno never quite understood Casita when he was younger but that last slam of the door felt almost like a scolding.

"Now you stay here and go to sleep."

When he turned toward the bed, the smile of a sleepy, amused and understanding Mirabel greeted him. Although she lifted the sheets for him to cover himself with them, he refused, covered her again, and lay down on top of the sheets. That night, he got as far away from her as he could without falling out of bed and stared at the ceiling. This didn't matter much to Mirabel but she understood so she moved close enough to him to rest her forehead on his shoulder and the soft scent of the shampoo in her curls and the smell of the Encanto flowers wafting through the open window was enough to lull him to sleep.

Those nights, they did nothing but sleep or talk until they fell asleep in each other's bed, but those nights were a secret they had with the rest of the family.

Of course they weren't doing anything "wrong" but still, they weren't sure if the rest of the family would take it well if they knew.

OK, so much for that. I went on longer than I wanted to, but I hope you were entertained, if only a little.

A very friendly fist bump from a distance!

PS: Is there a nickname we can refer to you by? I'm not sure if you've mentioned it before, but if you did I hope you don't mind commenting on it again :D

Thank you! It's always nice to hear from you! Genuinely, this ask made me smile so much 💚

And yes, a few months ago, I think we got some twitter mirabruno artists migrating over here and I'm still elated about it! I had to experience twitter brumira vicariously so it's very exciting to see some of the people whose art I adored from afar here.

I do disappear from time to time, but I have every intention to return to this blog and keep reblogging art into the foreseeable future.

Now onto the mirabruno portion. You're right! Even with that ending, the road of recovery is far from linear. It's more of a cycle or a feedback loop. Bruno, Mirabel, and the family are definitely in for a ride with lots of ups and downs and back and forth.

This is so sweet!!! Not inherently romantic but still intimate and affectionate has become my brumira sweet spot! I love the idea of these two developing a habit of sharing a bed. If they were to go about sharing a bed this way, I imagine each would soon need the other to sleep, which is another soft and sweet idea on its own.

I bet Casita would help them by creating a secret pathway in the walls between their rooms so they could continue their nightly escapades without the family's notice.

And regarding my nickname. Funny, you should ask (especially because of your URL). I've been in between names for awhile now. A few years ago, I was going by a name that some people may know me by, but I never really connected with it. Over these last few months, I have been trying to think of a name I like. Internally, I've been trying out the name Grey, and maybe it's time to test it out outside of myself. So, you can call my Grey :) Thanks for asking!

[blackfoxstudios]

My Danganronpa OC + Tickle Headcanons

For context, her name is Rebekah Dillon and she is the Ultimate Chess Expert

Lee Headcanons

Okay, so, her main personality is super timid (think Mikan for example), so I imagine she would be a pretty damn ticklish person

Homegirl was isolated almost her whole life due to being part of an upper class family, so she has ZERO resistance to physical touch (she may have a craving for it)

She would probably be sensitive all over her body, except for her hands since she's had to shake so many hands in her lifetime

Her death spots would probably be her ears and neck. While the rest of her body is incredibly sensitive, the moment you touch her ears and neck, her soul straight up leaves her body

She most definitely has a quiet giggly laugh, filled with a lot of "no"s and "please"s and "not there"s

She never really had a lot of physical touch as a child, so her first reaction to being tickled is to curl into a fetal position

She isn't a very violent lee, she'll just curl up and try to defend herself as much as possible, so if you really wanna torture her, you'll have to restrain her

Not a big fan of revenge (mostly cause she is so frail she can't even win a thumb-war), so if you do wreck her, don't expect to be wrecked back cause she most likely won't get vengeance. Also, she is terrified of confrontation

Ler Headcanons

Like I said, she isn't a big fan of confrontation, so she probably wouldn't tickle someone else unless they verbally asked her to, and even then, she would be as gentle as possible, constantly stopping to ask "red light?"

Her fingers are pretty soft, so expect feathery like touches

You'll also get a lot of breathing breaks, cause again, she constantly stops to make sure you're okay

Cheer-Up tickles are her specialty (and the only form of tickles she gives out.) It isn't her first resort though, you'll have to ask her to give you them if you want them

The QUEEN of aftercare, she really cares about those she is close to, so when she's done, she will pamper the everliving shit out of you for the rest of the day.

Summary

To put it simply, she is 90% Lee and 10% Ler

If she was to be tickled by any existing Danganronpa characters, her favorite lers would probably be Gundham or Gonta or Kiyotaka, since she views them as "oh, if you're in danger, run to them, they will protect"

Her favorite lee though? She doesn't tickle others enough to have a favorite lee, but I'd have to say maybe Kiyotaka? I think the two would be pretty similar in upbringing, so they would probably find some type of comfort with each other

Tickle Chart

Credits to @fluffomatic for their tickle chart!

[wardenred]

Sapphic September 6: Experiment

Flo and Jules again, a few more years back into the past from the previous snippet.

"Flo! Damn you, Florika, wait!"

Early in the evening, the crowd of people walking up and down the sidewalks resembled a river. A solid, relentless current that existed to get lost in. Jules squeezed between strangers, trying to keep her eyes on the back of Flo's black jacket with the red spray-painted Fuck Your Corps fading against the worn leather. More faded than Jules had realized, although she still felt uncomfortable about Flo wearing it about town. What if the police noticed? Or, worse, the heroes?

"Flo!"

She feared she would never catch up. But then there it was, a particularly busy intersection, and she just knew what Flo was going to do next: delve straight into the darkest, narrowest alleyway. So she took a gamble and did the same, and finally, finally.

"Stop running away from me," Jules demanded. To Flo's credit, she did stop walking when Jules grabbed her elbow. She didn't turn around, though, just stood there, staring straight ahead into the shadows. Jules let out an exasperated huff. "Seriously, what's your deal? You don't want to accept, fine, but you don't have to act like I attacked you or something!"

"Well, you as good as did," Flo snarled. Jules dropped her arm and staggered backward. She didn't expect this level of anger, but on second thought, she should have. She should have known this was the main reason Florika ever ran away: to protect those she loved from her own temper.

Jules wished she could make her understand she didn't need protecting.

"All right. Can you tell me how I did it?"

Flo drew in a noisy breath. "Isn't it obvious? Every time I try to make something out of myself, you decide it's too dangerous and look for new ways to wrap me up in cotton! You're just like Mel sometimes, always trying to tell me how to live."

"I don't think this is a fair comparison," Jules said. Moving carefully alongside a concrete wall, she squeezed deeper into the alley until she was standing in front of Florika. "I'm not trying to lure you into working for the Corps. I hate them as much as you do. All I'm offering is for you to move in with me, and yes, to consider taking a job with my father who is very much opposing the Corps too." She felt the opposite of safe talking about it out in the street, even with no one close enough to hear. Still safer than leaving these things unsaid. "But you don't have to. You can simply say no, and I'll still be here."

Flo snorted. "Yes, you will be, won't you? You'll keep worrying when I have to disappear because of my work. The work I chose for myself and love doing and it puts me in no one's debt, not that any of that matters. You'll keep trying to make me see how much easier things would be if I went along with what people expect. You'll keep bringing up powers—"

"I haven't brought up that subject in three months, Flo."

Florika stared resolutely past her. "And you'll keep rubbing it into my face, how I’m 'always picking the path of most resistance.' How there are better options that would make everyone worry less. Because obviously, I want to make you worry, right? I'm the bad guy here. There's no way I'm making my choices for me."

Jules shifted closer and grabbed Flo's hands in the dark. "This isn't anything I've ever said, is it? I'm sorry if that's what you hear. I'm not trying to take away your choices. I do worry, just like I know you worry for me when I do things you find dangerous. But that's not why I asked you to move in."

Flo still resisted meeting her eyes. "Yeah, sure. It has nothing to do with trying to control me. I—" Her voice cracked. "I love you, Jules. But I need a partner, not a babysitter."

"Well, that's good, because I need a partner, too, not a babysitting charge. I don't even know what to do around children." Jules squeezed Flo's fingers tighter. "Listen. Let's backtrack, all right? Let's forget about the job thing. You're right. You already have a career." 

She didn't know if running around with freelancing criminals could be called that, but if she really thought about it, there was little chance her father would offer Flo anything safer. At first, maybe, to appease Jules and lull them both into a false sense of security. Later, though... 

She shuddered.

"It was really a dumb idea," she said with feeling, "and I promise to never, ever bring it up again. But as for the other thing, the moving in together thing... Maybe that's something you could think about, after all. Not because I want to control you. Just because I want to have as much time with you as possible. So. Maybe you could... come around for the weekend and then stay around? While you're searching for a new apartment, anyway? And then if I turn out to be insufferable to live with, all right, you'll sign some new lease. But maybe it will work out. Call it an experiment."

Finally, their eyes met.

"An experiment," Flo repeated. The uncertainty in her voice was a vast improvement over vehement denial.

Jules nodded. "Yes. Or a chance to prove me wrong, if you will. Come on. Convince me we can't make it work. I dare you."

"You do really want me to be the bad guy, don't you?" There was no bite in Flo's voice anymore, and the hesitant smile lurking in the corners of her lips was the best sight ever.

"Well, love," Jules leaned in, "you're the one who wants to make it as a villain. I'm just playing along."