#i do like that the new studio whose name i have already forgotten has kept with the hidden faces theme

[smolsix]

so more LN III thoughts (not as many at least, read more is just for users who are avoiding altogether)

I keep thinking abt how the single player you'll be playing with an AI like LN II, and I think the game would offer a lot of replay ability if you can choose which kid you play as as they both do different things (the wrench kid has the wrench for puzzles and breaking things, and the masked kid has the slingshot). in multiplayer it makes enough sense you can pick which one to play as, but if you can choose in single I think it'd make the game have a lot more play value and that's super cool.

the fact it has online co-op can mean so much for cool additional things, and i do hope character customisation is still there (LN with Six's masks/hats and LN II with Monos also) even if you have to unlock it which would also still offer replay ability.

[getitinbusan]

10 years with Jungkook

California

You met Jeon Jeongguk in the summer of 2012. Two kids brought together by a calling to California and a chance at making it big. Best friends from the start, what happens when only one of you becomes successful? Do you ever forget your first love? 

Childhood friends to lovers, angst and smut.

Words:  4600

Warnings: 18 plus smut. Oral F, Sex MF, Swearing. Pretty Mild for me. This is a previously posted fic that has been updated and reworked.

It was a rare rainy August day in California. The heavy drops created a sad melody on the window as you put the dishes away. Tired and lonely, the feeling in your gut kept nagging at you, maybe it was time to give up. 

The savings account was drained, there were no jobs to be found and  this was the second month of falling short on rent. Surely it would only be a matter of time before your roommates would stop exchanging house cleaning for money. 

Hanging the threadbare towel over its hook you stood in the kitchen, your mood mirroring the dim light of the afternoon. Feeling frusterated and stupid, it had taken you way longer than it should have to realize that in LA, you were nothing. Not pretty enough, rich enough, skinny enough or talented enough to ever make it big. So this is how the great Califonia chapter of your life would end, not by choice but necessity. 

Gathering up the mail that was strewn across the countertop, you shuffled through it sorting its priority. Junk mail, bills, personal…one in particular standing out. Your heart began pounding as you took in the details.

The penmanship was nice, black ink on an unassuming envelope. But it was the stamp that caught your attention. It was sent from Korea.

Flipping it in your hand you examined the torn top. The letter, having been read, was cradled back safely inside. Addressed to your roommate a frown crept onto your face. Why wouldn’t he write to you?

It was a ridiculously hopeful notion but you widened the envelope and inhaled trying to find a trace of his fragrance, something, anything to trigger a happy memory. Cool California nights were the best excuse. How many times had you borrowed his sweaters just to have his smell on you?

You missed him. It had been a year and a half and you couldn't help but once again ponder the nagging question that always crept back. If you hadn't forced him to break the rules would he still be a part of your life? 

It was too tempting to resist, your fingers pinched the paper inside of the envelope and pulled it free. 

I’m feeling low, I don’t know who I am, only who I’m supposed to be.

What would life be like if I had stayed in California? We could all be roommates, hanging out and having fun, going to the beach on weekends.

Does she even think about me?

It sounds greedy that with how much I have right now, it’s not enough. I would give anything to wake up in bed beside her everyday. I want more than anything to be able to talk to her about these things but I can’t. I’ve made the mistake of trading her for fame and now I’m destined to keep her at an arm’s length so she’ll never know the price I paid.

How does she even see me? As an Idol? As the boy who abandoned her? Has she forgotten the good days we spent together?

I’ve been wrestling with myself, whoever that is. I wish I could be the teenage boy from that long ago summer again. I wrote this song thinking about it…

~When I see you smile in the screen

You’re good at everything

You’re just perfect

Feels like I've never been you

Do you even see me?

Do you know who I am?

Or how do I look now?

You don’t like me like that

I want to be your decalcomania~

I’m afraid I may not get back for a while, please write. Your friendship and thoughts of her are the only things that are keeping me tethered to some semblance of reality.

JK

Clutching the letter to your chest, your mind took you back to that day. 

"Decalcomania, the art or process of transferring pictures and designs. Making a copy of the original on a different medium"  

Reading the description on the wall you’d both stood laughing at the piece's strange name, Decalcomania. The gallery visit felt like lifetimes ago but you still remembered clearly. You remembered, not because the piece had struck you as particularly special but because that's where you had decided that Jeongguk's laugh was the best sound you'd ever heard.  

California had lured you into its promise when you turned 14. Having been accepted to an  intensive dance program at The Movement Lifestyle Studio you packed up and headed West for the summer. 

It was July and it was hot, the dancers stepping off the bus one at a time took their places in the studio.

Looking around there were so many older kids, you were probably one of the youngest. Calling out names they put you into groups, it appeared to be by age so you made your way across the unfamiliar wooden floor to the tiny gathering of teens in the darkened corner.

Shy introductions were made as one more member was ushered over to where you had congregated. “This is Jeongguk.” 

He had the cutest smile and barely spoke english but his eyes twinkled like the constellations. Immediately drawn to each other you became fast friends.

Absolutely exhausted by the end of the first few days he quietly knocked at your door.

He was homesick and lonely, used to being surrounded by his six members, he couldn’t sleep well without someone beside him. You let him crawl into bed with you, you were 14 and it was innocent. 

Inseparable, days and nights were spent side by side, the others began referring to you as the twins. It was the best summer of your life but like every boy meets girl summer story, it had to come to a close. Promising through tears to keep in touch and stay friends you went your separate ways. 

Jeongguk would send silly videos of his practice sessions, goofing around with the other members.  He’d facetime and text but he always loved to send handwritten letters.

They lived in a box under your bed and contained stories of how hard he was working to become an idol. He always signed off with, "I miss you,” and a few lines of lyrics he’d written.

You didn’t know then how important they would become, the only tangible piece of him you could still hold on to.  

Whenever he came back to America you did everything you could to see him. You always found a way to get to the small tour stops whenever they came through. 2015 was the first, then KCon in 2016, but 2017, it was different.

Facetiming you with the news that they were bringing the Wings tour to NY, Chicago and Anaheim, he asked if you’d be part of the dance crew. How could you turn down two weeks with Jungkook the hottest new K-pop Idol? They were getting bigger, more popular and their lives were changing rapidly.

He had strict rules, girls were completely off limits. No talking, no hugging, no smiling at one another, any little thing could be easily misconstrued by the fans. Everything had to be done in secret. Jungkook would sneak you into his hotel room where you would spend your nights together catching up. The boys would bring you in food and cover for him while you both stayed locked away out of sight.

While happy to be with him, you could tell there was an underlying sadness he was holding on to.

"I wish I could go and explore the city with you like we used to," his voice trailed off.

You were laying in each other’s arms cuddling on his bed.  Leaning over he kissed the top of your head.

"All I really want is to take you on a proper date."

You snuggled closer into his side as he exhaled deeply, releasing his secret. 

"I’ve been waiting so long to become someone, a man worthy of your affection. Now I’m stuck. I have everything I wanted and I’m not allowed to share it with you."

His arms gripped you tighter.

"I’m sorry, this is a terrible confession. I don’t expect you to love me back, not under these circumstances, I just need you to know, you’re the only girl I’ve ever loved and there won’t be anybody else, ever." 

Every bit of his confession, every moment of that last night in the hotel room had stuck with you to this day. The words of a 19 year old boy whose life had become bigger than the feelings of two people.

He'd left in the morning without knowing. You were a coward, too afraid to tell him you loved him too.  

LA became your home right after they left Anaheim. Focused on your dancing, if you became good enough, maybe you could join the tour with him. 

A letter with a big bouquet of flowers arrived a few weeks later. 

"Congratulations on your new house in LA!

I hope that all of you are getting along as roommates, it’s hard living with others sometimes.

Last night I dreamt that I was there with you and all of our friends. We were having a party on the beach and we sat together watching the sunset.

Do you remember after practice when we would skateboard as fast as we could to the ocean so we wouldn’t miss the colors?

Maybe one day my toes can feel the sand there again.

I miss you, I miss me… the me I am when I get to be with you.

We're coming back in October for a few days and I’m hoping I can see you, I’m lonely already.   

Jeongguk

~Won’t you please stay in dreams

I can hear the sea from far away

Across the dream, over the bush

Go there where it becomes clear

Take my hands now

You are the cause of my euphoria

When I’m with you, I’m in utopia~

By the time The AMAs came, the plan had been finalized. You would steal Jungkook away so that you could take him on your first real date.

Having enlisted Namjoon to help, he was your inside man. The boys, happy to help finally get you together, would cover for his whereabouts with management. The day before the awards they were only scheduled for styling, as long as he wasn’t late for the press rounds the next afternoon your plan could work.

It was Namjoon’s job to get him out of the building. Telling him to follow his lead, Joon convinced the managers that Jungkook must have eaten something bad for lunch. Claiming to not feel well, he was whisked away to meet you at the hotel’s back receiving door. 

Sitting in the shiny red rented convertible you tossed him a pair of sunglasses. What you wouldn’t give now to see that smile again.

Barely giving him time to get in you’d sped away heading straight for In And Out Burger.

"Kookie, I hope you’re ready for the best day of your life! We’re going to eat until we explode, drink and party at the beach and then, instead of returning you to your fancy 5 star hotel you’re staying the night in my crappy little house with a tiny uncomfortable bed!!"

He laughed, that perfect laugh. It was so pure and honest, thinking about it now made you sad. Was that the last moment he'd gotten to be his true self? Jeongguk the man not Jungkook the personna? 

Knowing you only had one day to give him everything, one day to show him you loved him, you tried to make the best of it.

Picking up the food Jungkook held onto the red and white bags in the passenger seat, sneaking his hand in to steal fries when he thought you weren’t looking. If you weren’t sure you were in love with him before you you certainly were now.

Pulling up beside the tree on the beach he was stunned, "Ahhh Jagi, I can’t believe you brought me here."

Happy that it meant as much to him as it did to you, you both sat on the branch and ate. Two blocks from the old studio this used to be your escape. Every break you’d make your way to the tree for some time alone, together. 

With the burgers done he turned to you and smiled. It felt like he wanted to say something, but stupidly, you'd cut him short leading him back towards the car.

Making your way through your checklist you brought him back to where you'd first met. The Movement studios students were starstruck when he walked in. After insisting that he teach some choreography, he reluctantly led the class.

Your eyes were glued to him as he moved in front of the mirrors, no longer that awkward teenager but a full grown man mesmerizing you with his every move.

Getting back to the car he stopped you before you reached for the handle. Putting his arms around you he pulled you in close. But again, you resisted him. 

"You stink Jungkook, our next stop is the ocean."

You remember pulling away. How stupid you were, you should have held on to him longer. Reaching into the back seat you revealed a pair of swim shorts and a towel. He looked disappointed that you kept interrupting his attempts at intimacy. It broke your heart but you had a plan and limited time to execute it. 

The Ocean was chilly but the wind was warm, he came out of the change room with the shorts on but still wearing his shirt.

"Kookie, this isn’t Korea, you don’t have to be so modest here. Plus, you should grab some sun, you may not believe it but when your skin is sunkissed," you grinned, "you look really sexy."

He raised his eyebrows and quickly removed the shirt at your request.

Running into the water you splashed and played and he took great pleasure in picking you up and throwing you as far as he could.

The sun was getting ready to set and you wanted to dry off before the cooler air set in.

Leading him back to the shore you both laid down on the towel. He put his arm around you and you cuddled into his side.

"My god Guk, look at your abs!"

He blushed like crazy as you traced the muscles on his stomach.

"Stop, it tickles," he giggled.

But you didn’t, you kept tickling him until he held you so tight you couldn’t move. He had you pinned, flipping you on your back he shook his wet hair flinging water droplets all over you. Pleased with himself he leaned in closer to you, his eyes asking for permission to kiss you. As the gap between you got narrower you could hear his name being shouted and footsteps running closer. He flopped onto his back and sighed as your roommates and friends piled on top of him.

Eating, drinking and catching up with everyone you watched each other from across the bonfire. Moving from person to person he slowly made his way back to your side.

"Welcome back." Running your hand through the back of his hair, it was now or never. 

Pulling him closer your lips finally met in the way they were destined, soft, slow and full of love. His hands instinctively moved to cup your face as the world stopped around you.

"I love you," you whispered.

Nose to nose he smiled at you and it was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen.

It didn’t last long, his phone started going off incessantly. The managers knew, you’d been careless, photos and videos of him from the studio had been posted online.

"I’m so sorry Jungkook, I didn’t mean for you to get in trouble."

His eyes turned hungry as he grabbed your hand.

"You promised I wouldn’t be going back to my hotel tonight, let’s get out of here."

If he was going to get in trouble anyway, why stop now?  

The drive back to your place was quiet, adrenaline and hormones flowing like electricity through you both. The time for smiling was over as the seriousness of the situation lingered in the air between you.

It wasn’t just being in trouble or being caught, but the fact that you both knew what was going to happen when you stepped into your bedroom. One act that would change everything between you, it held the power to change the dynamic of your relationship forever.

Leading him to your room you closed the door and stood staring at him as he sat on your bed. He raked his fingers through his hair before he spoke.

"I’ve never wanted anything more in my life than to be able to make love to you. BUT I also know that when I leave I’m not going to get to see you again for a very long time." His head hung low. "Management is going to do everything possible to keep us apart and that won’t be fair to you. I think that maybe we should just let our happy memories of today be enough, I don’t want you to regret anything. " 

Walking closer you stood between his legs and he wrapped his arms around your waist.

"The only thing I'll regret is never getting to experience all of you. I can’t live not knowing how it feels to be totally yours even if it's only for one night."

He rested his head against your chest, "You’ll always be mine."

His hands traveled to the hem of your shirt and his fingers ran over the soft skin of your stomach. Undoing the button of your jeans he slowly slid them down your legs and you stepped out of them. 

Standing up he lifted the thin fabric of your shirt over your head and you stood before him waiting as he took his off too. Unclasping your bra he sighed as he looked at you taking in your shape, his fingertips hovering over your hard nipples.

"I’ve never done this before," he confessed.

"Me either," you whispered. "I've only ever wanted it to be you."

More relaxed he let his mouth start exploring your body. You were goosebumps and shivers beneath him as his tongue found it’s home between your legs.

He was soft and careful, placing his lips over your clit sucking it in delicately until your moans couldn’t be contained any longer. You could feel his eyes burning into you as he watched in awe as his finger slid inside you.

"It feels good Kookie, please…"

You could feel his mouth stopping to smile before he picked up speed. Moving your hips to eagerly meet his mouth you were unravelling quickly.

"The way you taste is better than anything I had imagined."

Devouring you in sessions between his words of adoration you came hard on his tongue. 

"I'm really regretting running you all over town today when we could have just been here...doing that.. " You were out of breath. 

"I was worried that I wouldn't be any good." He grinned at you pleased with himself. 

Moving up to where your head lay on the pillow he pushed the dampened hair off your face, "Are you ok? Do you need anything?"

He placed his forehead against yours.

"I just want you. I need you to know I'm yours, forever. 

Rolling a condom on he moved slowly to line himself up with your entrance.

"Tell me if you need me to stop okay?"

He pushed carefully, slowly stretching you around him. Watching intently for discomfort he froze when he saw the tears welling in your eyes.

"Shit, I’m so sorry, let’s stop, I didn’t mean to hurt you." He was apologetic as he thumbed away the tears.

"No," you delicately kissed his lips. "I’m okay… I’m just so happy, so overwhelmed with how much I’m feeling right now."

He smiled down at you, pressing his body closer he gave another push until he was fully inside. Your bodies fell into a beautifully choreographed rhythm until Jungkook was so lost in pleasure he began to move at his own pace. Quicker and deeper he moved until he finally spilled into the condom. 

Laying together in euphoria you kissed, and kissed, and kissed until you finally found sleep while wrapped around one other.

Every few hours he’d wake you up. His hands running over your body checking to make sure you weren't just a dream. You’d made love each time, everytime better than the last.

It was 9 am when he caressed you awake once more.

"I have to leave soon. I don’t want to." He spoke in whispers nestled into your neck. "Please tell me to stay."

Your heart broke at his words. "If I ask you to stay, I’m selfish, you’ll always wonder if you made the right decision." The tears came, knowing you had to do what was right. "If I tell you to go, your dreams come true… ” your voice trailed off.

"And I’ll always wonder if I made the right decision,” he finished. 

Your phone started ringing and you knew time was up.

It was Joon, "I’m outside. Sorry, I held them off as long as I could. I told them that I’d come get him so you could at least have time to say goodbye."

Your tears fell out in heavy ugly sobs, "Okay, five minutes… and Joon… thanks, I know you’re probably in trouble too."

Hanging up you turned back, Jungkook was already out of bed with his clothes thrown on. He stood with open arms bravely waiting. 

"Thank you for yesterday I'll never forget it."

Laying your head against his chest you took a moment to listen to his heartbeat. You could hear him sniffle and knew he was crying too.

You flashed back remembering that night long ago when he came to you homesick, holding you so he could sleep while he tried to hide his tears. There was a knock at the door and Namjoon’s voice broke through the moment.

"We’ve got to go Jungkook."

Stepping away you’d left his shirt soaked in tears, handing him his sweater he pushed it back towards you. "You keep it."

He kissed you one last time before opening the door to reveal Namjoon's weary face. His Hyung put his arm around his shoulder and led him to the car.

Turning one last time he looked back, his eyes were filled with tears as he gave a small wave before getting in the back of the big black sedan. 

For months you pretended that management was the only thing keeping you apart.

You held on to that silly notion until May when they were coming for the Billboard awards. For weeks leading up you waited for a message, a secret meeting arrangement, but you got nothing. His image was all over the TV and his voice echoed through your empty heart. Then, just like that, it was over and he was gone again. 

Now, here you stood in your kitchen, his letter bringing him to the forefront of your mind and opening old wounds.

He was just as sad as you but what could you do? 

Picking up a pen you began writing… 

I shouldn’t have done it but I read it in your letter

You said to a friend that you wish you were doing better

I wanted to reach out but I never said a thing

You don’t ever have to be stronger than you really are

And honey, you don’t ever have to act cooler than you think you should

You’re brighter than the brightest stars

You’re scared to win, scared to lose

I’ve heard the war was over if you really choose

The one in and around you

You hate the heat, you got the blues

You’re changing like the weather, oh, that’s so like you

I’ll pick you up

I’ll catch you on the flipside

If you come back to California

We’ll do whatever you want, travel wherever, how far

We’ll hit up all the old places

We’ll have a party, we can dance till dawn… 

Y/N

October came again and a chill was in the air, the smell of the ocean hit your nose and you stopped to take it in.

Bundled in Jungkook’s hoodie you threw your bag over your shoulder and began your walk to work. You'd gotten lucky, Movement had hired you just as you were about to give up and leave California. Filled with hope and excitement a new intensive program was scheduled to start today and you were going to meet the future superstars of the dance world. 

Memories flooded your mind as you made your way through the familiar neighborhood. It still hurt, but things were beginning to feel happy again. Writing the letter had given you closure, he knew how you felt and beyond that there was nothing else you could do.

Opening the heavy door to the studio you caught a familiar reflection moving in the mirror.  Chalk marker in hand he was writing something, It couldn’t be?

Hearing the door click back into place he turned to face you.

"Hi."

He walked towards you slowly. Unsure of what your reaction would be, he approached with caution.

"Hi."

You were breathless, in the months of not seeing him he’d only grown more handsome.

"I can’t change what happened… and for the rest of my life I’ll be sorry for all of the time we missed."

He was getting closer.

"But I can’t take another day not knowing if I can fix this… somehow…"

He reached for your hand but you pulled it away. His head fell in disappointment.

"Jungkook, I can’t listen to this… look at me."

Reaching for his chin you pulled his head up until he was facing you again.

"I refuse to listen to you apologize for something that is out of your control. Your life was decided before you met me and I am nothing but grateful that I got to appear in some part of your story."

He tilted his head and pressed a small kiss into the hand that was still holding his chin.

"God I’ve missed you." He wrapped his arms tightly around your waist.

"How long are you here? I’ve got to teach class.. It’s the first day but I’d love it if we could catch up?"

He laughed at you and your knees buckled at the sound of his happiness.

Taking his chance he pressed his lips to yours and you could feel the smile forming on his face.

"I’m your private lesson Jagi, I’ve booked you for the next two weeks."

Taking a step back you had to ask, "How Jungkook? What will you be giving up?"

Pulling you back to his embrace he began to dance with you.

"There is no more giving up, on anything. Our contracts were over and I only had one thing I wouldn’t negotiate on, that’s you." 

He guided you to look at the mirror.

"I wrote you something."

~Please call my name one more time

I’m standing under the frozen light, 

but I’ll walk step by step towards you

Still with you ~

"I promise I’ll never let you go again."

[ladyreapermc]

Fic: Graham Norton (Keanu x F!Reader)

Summary:  based off Keanu’s first appearance in Graham Norton and the ‘I never’ bit.

Pairing: Keanu x F!Reader

Author’s Notes: So this has been sitting on my laptop for a while. I’m not all that happy with it and Keanu went so ooc in this, but that the hell! I’m gonna let you guys be the judge of it! Thank you @caryled​ for being my beta on this.

Wordcount: 2485

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, but otherwise pretty safe.

You’ve spent months saving money for this trip because it was your dream. You didn’t even remember when you started wishing you’d spend one of your birthdays in London, but it was finally happening now, on your twentieth-first. You thought it was fitting - such a momentous occasion marked by the trip of your life.

You and your best friend Sadie arrived a couple of days before New Year’s Eve of 2011 and would spend ten days in London, including your birthday. You planned to do so much on that trip that when you shared your ideas with Sadie, she nearly asked for a refund on her ticket.

The two of you began with all the regular tourist stuff, but there were also a few things that would be so special to you, like visiting some of the Doctor Who locations and doing the Jack the Ripper Walking Tour in Whitechapel, because you were a true-crime enthusiastic.

Along with all the sightseeing and other attractions, you and Sadie went barhopping every night, or better saying, pub hopping. Not only you because Sadie wanted to enjoy being able to legally drink since she wasn’t turning twenty-one until September, but you also wanted the best London experience you could get.

And to make sure that happened, the two of you made a pack in the airport of your hometown to assure neither of you would miss a unique opportunity by being embarrassed or afraid.

Whenever one of you said I dare you, the other had to do it or face the consequences, which would probably be an even more embarrassing or terrifying prank so the one being challenged might as well just suck it up and do the first dare already. So far, neither of you had backed down from a dare and you had all the pictures to prove it. As well as the hangovers.

On the morning of your birthday and Sadie woke you up at the crack of dawn, jumping on your bed and scaring the shit out of you. She had a higher alcohol tolerance than you, so even though both of you drank around the same amount, you had a pounding headache, while she looked fresh and wide awake.

“Rise and shine my dear! It’s your birthday! You’re officially legal! How does it feel?” She asked, bouncing on your bed.

“I hate you!” you groaned, feeling your stomach queasy. Your mouth tasted like something had crawled inside and died. “It’s six in the morning!”

“I know! I could barely sleep! I wanted to give you your present!” She announced, voice high-pitched with excitement as she shoved an envelope in your hands. “Open it!”

Grumbling in annoyance, you sat up and rubbed your eyes, trying to force yourself into consciousness. Fortunately, Sadie took pity on you and brought over some water and a bottle of aspirin.

You popped two pills before finally opening the envelope under Sadie's giddy gaze. You found two tickets to something called The Graham Norton Show that would happen that night.

“Thanks, Sadie,” you said, trying to force a happy smile. You could tell that she was obviously excited about this.

“Turn it around,” she asked, still smiling and unfazed by your less than enthusiastic response.

You obeyed and when your brain registered the name of one of the guests, your eyes went wide with shock.

“OH MY GOD!” You screamed looking at her. “Are you serious?”

“Yes!” She grinned. “Happy birthday, bitch!”

You looked back at the tickets, still in disbelief. Your favorite actor, Keanu Reeves would be a guest at the Graham Norton show tonight. You were going to share a room with Keanu, breathe the same air, maybe you’d get to ask a question? Was Graham Norton the kind of show with audience interaction?

To be honest, you didn’t really care. You were just happy to see him in person. That would be a dream come true. A photo and an autograph would be just a cherry on top, but not an actual need.

“You’re the best friend ever!” You told Sadie, pulling her into a bearhug, hungover completely forgotten.

You spent the rest of the day beaming with excitement, unable to focus on anything other than counting down the hours and minutes until you finally got to see Keanu. And maybe that was a little geeky of you, but you put on your The Matrix T-shirt for the night. Not only it was your favorite tee, but also such a special occasion deserved it.

You and Sadie arrived early at the studio, but there was still a line to get in. The two of you got good seats, middle section. Of course, you wanted to be closer, but you could only imagine how much those tickets would cost.

You could barely contain your excitement when he finally came on stage, dressed in an all-black suit, his long hair touching the collar of his shirt; beard a little unkempt, but it still suited him perfectly. As you watched him, your heart hammered against your ribs and your chest felt tight, like you were struggling to breathe. You just couldn’t sit still.

So, you took a moment to force yourself to relax and control your breathing. It wouldn’t do you any good having an anxiety attack right now. You’d miss the entire show and your chance of fangirling over Keanu.

It was a good interview and you couldn’t believe you’ve never heard of this talk show before. The host was pretty funny and had great chemistry with all the guests. He gave Keanu quite a lot of attention and the comedian, Marcus, was making a lot of comments on what was said.

You found it really sweet how Keanu tried to get Emilia involved in the conversation since she was quiet for a while, something that should’ve been the host’s job. You enjoyed the easy banter the four of them seemed to share and all the new tidbits of information about Keanu you were learning that day.

When it came time for the ‘I never’ section, something that Graham had explained before the show started and invited the audience to think on really common stuff that they had never done, but everyone else might have.

As Norton walked between the rolls of seats, talking to the audience, Sadie tugged your arm, catching your attention.

“I dare you to say I never kissed Keanu Reeves,” she whispered to you with a wicked grin and you stared at her wide-eyed.

“You’re crazy! I’m not doin’ it!” You hissed, feeling your cheeks hot at the mere thought of it.

“Do you really wanna face the consequences?” she asked with an arched eyebrow and from the way she was smirking, you could tell she was planning a terrible prank if you kept saying no.

So, against your better judgment, you put your hand up, praying that Norton wouldn’t pick you. There were many other people whose hands were raised as well.

He walked right past you to talk to the girl who had never seen The Matrix and you gasped in shock. You could sort of forgive someone not having read or seen Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings, but The Matrix?

Then Norton teased the guy that never ironed a shirt and for a moment you almost sighed in relief thinking you’d be free from the embarrassment.

“How about you?” he asked, gesturing at you and you froze, nearly dropping the mic when he gave it to you. “Where are you from, dear?”

“I came here for my birthday,” you replied, voice trembling.

“Oh! Happy birthday,” Norton said with a smile. “So, what’s your I never?”

You glanced at Sadie, pleading with your eyes, but her smirk only grew, and she shook her head. So, taking a deep breath and avoiding looking over the stage, you said:

“I-uh never kissed Keanu Reeves.”

People around you were chuckling and clapping and you just wanted to hide and pretend you didn’t just say that aloud.

Against your better judgment, you glanced at the stage and your gaze briefly locked with Keanu’s warm brown eyes. You could tell he was a little flustered in embarrassment, but there was a soft, amused smile playing on his lips.

“Good try,” Norton declared, laughing. “But you never will.”

Keanu finally looked away from you when Norton returned to the stage and the show resumed with the interviews. You found it hard to keep your gaze on the guests, still too mortified and confused. You even ignored Sadie, because she was mean and you hated her a little, even if she was your best friend.

When the show was finally over, you couldn’t wait to get out, put as much distance between yourself and what happened tonight, but the isles between the seats were narrow so you had to wait for everyone else in front of you to move before you could step out.

“Excuse me, miss?” a male voice called, and you turned to see a man in all black and with a headset on standing behind you. He looked like he worked for production. “Can you come with me, please?”

You shared a quick look with Sadie, but she just shrugged, promising to wait for you outside, before you followed the production assistant.

He took you through a maze of hallways behind the main stage until he paused at a door and knocked once before opening it for you. When you stepped inside, you froze in shock at seeing Keanu Reeves up close.

“Hi there,” he smiled and offered you a hand.

You stared at it for a moment, your brain too overwhelmed to actually process what was going on. He actually giggled, ducking his head and that was what finally shook you from your stunned silence.

“Hi!” you managed to stutter your name and take his hand and you were shaking. “I’m so sorry about what I said. It was a stupid dare from a friend.”

“It’s fine, I thought it was funny,” Keanu actually patted your hand in a comforting manner, and you managed a small, relieved smile. “Cool shirt.”

You looked down at yourself and chuckled, feeling your cheeks hot.

“Thanks. It’s one of my favorite movies,” you started. “I love your movies.”

You forced yourself to stop there even if you wanted to say more. Even if you wanted to tell him how much you appreciated his work and how his movies meant to you, but you didn’t want to sound too eager and weird.

“Thank you,” he replied with a smile, looking a half pleased, half self-conscious. “Listen, I just want to make sure you were alright. You looked really embarrassed afterward and like I said, I really didn’t mind.”

That was really sweet of him to worry, especially when you embarrassed both of you in front of a huge audience and on live TV. And just remembering it made you cringe.

“Hey, come on. It’s your birthday,” Keanu said in a comforting tone, correctly deducing why you were making that face. “You should enjoy it. Happy birthday, by the way.”

“Thanks,” you managed a smile because he looked a little awkward himself as he tried to console you and that was cute. “Can I have a picture and an autograph?”

“Of course.”

You grabbed your phone from your pocket and positioned yourself next to him, snapping a couple of pictures. You checked them quickly, making sure they were good, before pocketing your phone again.

“Do you have a piece of paper?” Keanu asked, picking up a sharpie pen.

For a moment you hesitated. You did have your Graham Norton ticket with you, but there wasn’t where you wanted the autograph.

“Can you do it on my shirt?”

“Sure.”

Beaming, you shrugged off your jacket and turned his arm at him, and Keanu signed your sleeve. You glanced over and grinned when you realized that he also wrote Welcome to the desert of the real, a line from the movie.

“Thank you so much!”

He just chuckled, pocketing the sharpie. He opened the door for you, stepping out of the dressing room along with you and leading the way to a maze of hallways.

 “So, what do you do?”

“I’m a majoring in English,” you replied, hands in your pocket as you walked side by side. “I’ve got one term left so I should probably start figuring out what I’m gonna do with the rest of my life.”

You had no idea why you just said that to Keanu, a complete stranger. You weren’t one to blurt out your private dilemmas. Not even to your own friends.

“Well, what do you want to do?” he asked, sounding actually curious.

“Am I being realistic or a dreamer?”

“Realistic,” Keanu replied, glancing at you.

“I want to teach,” you said with a fair amount of confidence. You already had a few internships and you knew that was something you liked doing it.

“And what’s your dream?”

The two of you had stopped in front of an emergency back exit. Keanu probably didn’t want to be mobbed by fans by going through the main entrance of the studio. 

Keanu watched you as you thought about his question. It wasn’t as if you didn’t know the answer. It was just that you had never said aloud before. Not even to yourself, but you wanted to say it to him. He had been your inspiration after all. If it hadn’t been for his movies, you would have never realized how much you loved to create your own stories; how much you loved to write.

“I want to be a writer,” you confessed, and his smile shifted into something soft and understanding and it took your breath away.

“Can I offer some advice?” he said, and you nodded. “Life’s too short to get stuck doing something you don’t really love. Follow your dreams.”

You felt your heart swell with emotion at the simple encouragement because it was so full of meaning. You couldn’t even begin to tell him how much it meant to you.

You met his gaze again in the half-light of the hallway and there was something in them that you couldn’t quite name, but it held you still, rooted to your spot, heart thundering in your chest, a lump of emotion closing of your throat.

Keanu leaned forward, his lips brushing softly against yours, beard tickling your skin. It was a barely-there touch, but it felt branded on you.

“Now you can have some fun in your next I never game,” he said with a small smirk and you grinned. “It was very nice to meet you.”

He stepped back and held the door open for you.

“You too, Keanu.”

You stepped outside a huge grin on your lips. This had certainly been the best birthday ever.

xxx

Taglist (give me a shout if you want to added.)

@poisonedjoinery @ringa-starr @curly-minnie @i-cant-remember-my-old-login

@caryled @beyond-antares @kathorax @krazycags01 @meetmeinthematinee

@red-pill-blue-pill @baphometwolf666

[cheemerthelizard]

Crusader of Life 2: Chapter 14

After that encounter with Kira, Lily has to act like everything is completely fine, when she knows it’s definitely not. However, with her terrible lying skills and a manga who can look into her life, will she be able to keep the secret for long?

“Are you sure your neck is alright?” Kakyoin asked. The whole trip, Lily was rubbing it, as if something was there.

“I told you, I’m fine,” Lily answered. Right, if she was going to stay alive, she had to act inconspicuous. That meant no rubbing her neck. Because if she gave away the fact that she met him, then she would have no neck. Or any other body part. She’d be dead.

“If you say so,” Kakyoin sighed. Something had been off about Lily ever since she came back from her walk. He could tell that her saying the torn clothing was from falling into a bush was a lie, considering they were completely destroyed in some places and had been soaked in blood. Surely she would tell him after they got done with Rohan, though.

“Alright, here’s your stop,” the taxi man told them. “The Kishibe residence.”

“Thank you very much,” Lily said.

“My pleasure,” the taxi man smiled. “Oh, and if your neck is stiff, I find that massages always help loosen it up.”

How noticeable was she being? Even the man who kept his eyes on the road noticed her rubbing. “I’m sure that’ll help me, thank you again.”

“Of course,” he nodded, rolling up the window and driving off.

“Alright, let’s do this,” Lily said. If there was anything she could do to get her mind off of her encounter, it was the task she needed to do right now. As she and Kakyoin walked up to the doorbell, she noticed somebody walking out of the corner of her eye. Kira! Her entire body stiffened a little bit as they locked eyes, but nothing else happened, thankfully.

“Are you okay?” Kakyoin asked. “You suddenly got really tense.”

“I’m fine,” Lily lied. “Just a bit nervous about this guy.”

Kakyoin hummed in response. “Don’t be. If he tries to harm you, I’ll make him regret it.”

Lily smiled at Kakyoin’s words, almost blushing a little. There is one thing she was sure of: if she were to die, her death would certainly be avenged. She reached out to ring the doorbell, but just as she did, a hand came from the other side and grabbed her arm.

“Hey! Let go of her!” Kakyoin exclaimed.

“Who are you? What do you want?” the man behind the door, supposedly Rohan, asked. He let go of Lily and opened the door slightly more.

“We’re members of the Speedwagon Foundation!” Lily answered frantically. “We’ve come to your house because of something to do with an arrow!”

“An arrow?” Rohan questioned.

“Yes,” Kakyoin answered. It was amazing to Lily how he could keep his composure near a man like this. “We’ve received reports that you have been stabbed with a special arrow, and survived the attack. Have you been noticing a weird, ghost-like creature following you?”

Rohan tilted his head and furrowed his eyebrows. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I was never stabbed with an arrow, nor do I have any weird creatures following me. Perhaps you have the wrong guy.”

The two looked at each other, then back at Rohan.

“Of course,” Lily bowed. “We’re sorry for taking your time.”

“Wait, you’ve come all this way,” Rohan said. “Why not rest a bit at my house? I could show you a tour of my studio. Even if you don’t know who I am, wouldn’t it be nice to brag to others that you saw a famous person’s house?”

Lily looked over at Kakyoin. They weren’t exactly booked for the rest of the day, but she could tell Kakyoin wanted to talk to her in private. Probably about the neck thing.

“We’d love to!” Lily exclaimed. Anything to avoid accidentally spilling her secret. “Come on, Noriaki, won’t it be nice?”

Oh, something was DEFINITELY up with Lily. Kakyoin hadn’t seen her so excited about something she really didn’t care about up until then. It seemed like she was avoiding his conversation.

As Rohan led the two of them into his house, Kakyoin gave Lily’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

“I’ll go get some refreshments really quick,” Rohan told them. “You two stay here.”

As soon as Rohan left, Kakyoin spoke. “I know you’re hiding something from me.”

“Huh?” Lily asked. “Me?”

“Don’t play dumb,” Kakyoin said. “What happened when you were on your walk?”

“Now’s not the time to talk about that,” Lily whispered. “We’re at someone’s house, and I don’t want to ruin the mood.” Hopefully, if she acted normal the whole time while they were here, Noriaki will have forgotten that he even needed to talk. Luckily for her, Kakyoin took the bait, and they stayed quiet until Rohan came back with some food.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” he said. “I hope you like cookies, I didn’t have much time to prepare.”

“That’s more than alright,” Lily reassured him. “They look delicious!”

“So,” Rohan began, “Speedwagon Foundation, huh? Must be exciting dealing with the supernatural every day.”

“You would think,” Kakyoin chuckled, “but after a couple of years it just becomes clockwork.”

“I’m sure any normal job would bore you to death, then!” Rohan laughed. “What sort of things have you dealt with before?”

“That’s a secret we can’t tell,” Lily smiled.

After the three of them had conversed for a couple of minutes, Kakyoin looked down at his watch. “Oh, would you look at the time,” he said. “We should probably be going soon. It was nice to meet you, Mr. Kishibe.”

“Ah, wait! Before you go,” Rohan ran to his studio and grabbed a closed envelope before running back to Lily and Kakyoin, “I want you to have the honors of looking through my transcript. Not many people get to see this, you know.”

Lily looked at Kakyoin, and Kakyoin Lily, and they both shrugged.

“No harm in it, right?” Lily replied.

Rohan opened up the envelope, and a strange energy emerged from the pages, blinding the two for a short moment with a bright light. When the light went away, however, something felt different, like their skin had pulled away, but instead of revealing their muscles underneath, it was a second layer of skin. Looking down at her hand, Lily saw that her hand was peeled back, revealing words underneath, similar to a book. Reading some of the words, she realized these were things she’s experienced.

Her first thoughts when she figured out her life was now open like a book was not worried about her privacy, but rather, if he would figure out about Kira. After all, if he was found out, her life was as good as gone.

“You…” Kakyoin growled. “What did you do to us?!”

“I made your life into a book, of course,” Rohan smirked. “As a mangaka, I’m constantly looking for inspiration, and this new ability of mine has let me look into people’s lives, and find the perfect characteristics for my characters.”

“You were struck by the arrow, you liar!” Lily yelled.

“I was, I’ll admit,” Rohan sneered. “But I couldn’t let you know that. You probably have abilities of your own. Now then, whose life should I read through first? How about yours, Kakyoin?”

Although Kakyoin was being approached by Rohan, he didn’t lose his scowl. “You’ll regret this, you know,” he said.

“Oh, I will?” Rohan taunted. “Just try to attack me. Either one of you.”

“Hierophant Green!” Kakyoin cried. His Stand appeared right beside him. “I’ll make sure you know the true power of my Emerald Splash!”

As a hundred green gems shot towards Rohan, he just stood there, standing confidently. When the emeralds had all hit something and disappeared, not a scratch was on him.

“But that’s impossible!” Kakyoin exclaimed. “I understand a few missing you, but not a single one hitting?”

“I already wrote on both of you that you can’t hurt me,” Rohan chuckled. “Whatever I write in there will become true, but I don’t want to write too much or your lives will be fake. Now then, if you don’t mind… actually, even if you do mind, I’ll be looking into your life now.”

Lily was relieved she wasn’t the first target for Rohan. That meant she had time to make an escape, and hopefully alert Jotaro. For some reason, walking while she was a book was practically impossible, so she had to crawl her way out.

“Hm, yes, I see,” Rohan nodded as he looked at Kakyoin’s book. “So, even as a child, you had this ability. Although, not much really happens, in fact, you’re pretty distant from everyone, so nothing happens at all. That is, until this trip to Egypt you took with your family. That’s when you met a… man? A vampire? A vampire named… Dio. That’s when you were forced by a flesh bud, whatever that is, to swear loyalty to him. Oh, and the next fifty days after this Jotaro man saved you are filled to the brim with excitement! Enemies left and right, bonding with friends, oh, and a love story. This is very exciting! You were almost to the brink of death, but your girlfriend, Lily, oh, I guess future wife, then, saved you. Oh, and now we get more to the present day! You marry, of course, then there’s a child, Emily, who later gains a Stand ability, right before a… a trip to Morioh! Well, isn’t this something. You discover that a Stand arrow can give people abilities like your own, and that someone has been using it to… hold on, what’s this? ‘Lily Kakyoin has been acting very weird ever since she went on a walk today, and I can’t seem to find out why. I think she’s avoiding talking about it.’”

Lily stopped dead in her tracks. That comment confirmed everything.

“Now, then, why don’t we take a look at your life and uncover your little secret? Also, don’t bother running and calling for help, you’ll forget this even happened as soon as you leave this house.”

“Y-y-you st-stay away from me!” Lily shouted. “That secret is a secret for a reason, you know! I can’t tell anyone, or I die!”

“Aw, what pitiful excuses to keep me from reading you,” Rohan chuckled.

“No, I’m serious!” Lily said as her breathing quickened. “If anyone finds out my secret, I’ll die! I’m telling the truth, I swear!”

“Lily Kakyoin,” Rohan began. “Original name was Lily Sullivan. Another born Stand user. Grew up in America, went to a less than ideal public school, where there were either fights or beatdowns, constantly. You always wanted to help stop the fights, but you could never do much, so you healed the wounds of the person most injured. That is, if they weren’t immediately sent to the principal. Blah, blah, blah, moved to Japan high school year, ooh, met Jotaro Kujo and got yourself tangled up in the fight with Dio entirely by fate, almost died, twice, three times, four, we’re not counting all of that. There’s a few years of boredom, then you also arrive in Morioh with your Stand user child. Oh, and here’s the secret!”

“I’m begging you, please,” Lily whimpered. “You can read whatever else you want, but please don’t read that part.”

“One day, while taking a fine walk in Morioh, you ran across a man by the name of-”

“And what do you think you’re doing?” Jotaro asked. He had suddenly appeared right behind Rohan, who jumped a little.

“I sure hope you weren’t going to expose Lily there after she specifically said that she would die if anyone figured out what she was hiding,” Jotaro said. He grabbed Rohan’s shirt collar and lifted him up, summoning Star Platinum. “She’s terrible at lying, even with exaggerations, so saying that she’ll die is probably true. And I don’t want her to die.”

“You must be Jotaro Kujo,” Rohan said, trying to maintain the smug grin on his face despite Jotaro’s threats. “I’ve heard a lot about you in their stories. I also know that you can stop time, and Star Platinum can punch stronger and faster than any human ever could.”

Lily was suspicious of Rohan. Surely he had to be stalling for something.

“I’ll tell you what,” Jotaro scowled. “You erase the memories of Lily having a secret from us and let her and Kakyoin go, and I’ll only beat you senseless.”

Then, when looking in Rohan’s hands, Lily saw it. His transcript!

Jotaro, don’t look at the transcript! she tried to shout, but her mouth wouldn’t even move. Of course, not hurting Rohan also includes giving his enemy an advantage.

“I have a different proposition,” Rohan smirked. “How about you take a look at this!”

Then, in, quite literally, the blink of an eye, Rohan flew back into his desk, injured in several places. His transcript had been tossed aside, and Jotaro was in a slightly different position.

“Now, then, I’ll ask again.” Before Rohan could get up again, Jotaro placed a foot on his chest. “Since you’ve already been hurt pretty bad, I suggest you erase Kakyoin and I’s memory of Lily having a secret, and let them go, or you just might need urgent care, and I won’t be calling the ambulance.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll write it in!” Rohan held his hands up in defense. “But I need to open up your memories in order to do it for you!”

“Then get done with everything else first, and let me write it on myself,” Jotaro ordered. “I don’t trust you in the slightest.”

Rohan cursed under his breath, then went over to Kakyoin to write in “Lily Kakyoin’s actions are completely normal, and I see nothing wrong with them. She is not keeping a secret from me.”

“Now, let them go,” Jotaro told Rohan. “Break them free from your Stand’s spell, and don’t do anything to me until they’re gone.”

“Y-yes, sir.”

Lily could feel her skin slowly close back from its opened form, and before she knew it, she was completely back to normal. One look at Kakyoin, and she could tell that he was back to normal, too.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay by yourself, Jotaro?” Kakyoin asked. “I mean, who knows what he’ll do to you once we leave?”

“I’ll be fine,” Jotaro reassured his friend. “Plus, even if you were to stay, what would you do? Attack him?”

Kakyoin laughed. “Good point. Well, I’ll see you later!”

As Lily and Kakyoin slowly walked out of the house, Kakyoin said, “Hey, I’m sorry about accusing you of hiding something from me. I should have known that you wouldn’t keep any secrets between us, even if it was life threatening.”

“It’s okay,” Lily replied. “It happens sometimes. I’m just glad you didn’t keep bickering me about it while Rohan was going to ‘get refreshments’” Or I would have spilled it all out.

“ORA! ORA!”

“Get back here you manga artist!”

The two looked over at Rohan’s house, then at each other. They couldn’t help but burst out into laughter.

“Looks like he got what was coming to him,” Kakyoin chuckled. “Hey, what time is it?”

“About 12:30,” Lily answered. “Looks like we still have some time to kill.”

“Then let’s kill that time together, shall we?” Kakyoin asked.

[popculturebuffet]

Giant Days (Boom) #1 “Like A Sexy Moon”

In honor of Giant Days grand finale one-shot this week, we go all the way back to the beginning of it’s long and storied ongoing where three first year university students consisting of a flighty energetic goth, a hardboiled detective metaphorically in the body of a med student, and a cheerful and naive small town girl whose mostly hair try to make it through lunch without chaos ensuing. Spoilers: Chaos ensues. Class, and a heartfelt mega-paragraph about my love of the series, is under the cut. 

A few years ago, i’d say about 2016, my mom had her annual oscar party. This isn’t all that relevant to the story, and reveals that even at 27 (I kept forgetting to correct my age on my blog), soon to be 28, I still live at home, but it’s important because it’s where I first read giant days. Buying the first volume during a comixology sale that had it for all of three bucks, I lapped up the series almost immediately,  then when I got home got my hands on every issue that had been out at the time and caught up asap, following the series since then to it’s conclusion this week. , only missing the “Where women blow and men plunder” special. For the past few years, in an ever changing comic book landscape where titles come and go, start strong and peter out or are just plain great or foul from the start but leave all the same , i’ts been my rock. My mountain in a sea of ever changing titles... and Wednesday said mountain breaks off and floats off into the either, maybe to become a new campus for the university of north carolina in the sky I dunno. The point is the series means a lot to me and it’s sad to see it go, even if it’s writer John Allison probably won’t leave my life and knowing him our heroes probably will return, or at least one or two of them will, someday, it’s still a sad end to a heartfelt, ungodly hilarious, sometimes rediculous but always intresting journey. My intrest may of waxed and waned, as is expected when a book runs 4 years, but it never left  my heart. So join me won’t you as I go back to where it all began.. not with the whole volume, but with the first monthly issue of giant days. 

------------------------- Giant Day is the creation of John Allison, who before creating this and other print works By Night and Steeple, which having not read past issue 1 or read it yet respectively will certainly pop up here eventually, was the creator of a large number of web comics, all of which I discovered thanks to Giant Days, in part because Giant Days itself is a Spin-Off from Allison’s second comic strip, and his most famous work pre-Giant Days: Scary Go Round

Scary Go Round itself was a spinoff/sequel to Allison’s previous comic strip Bobbins, originally following two minor characters from that strip before they were slowly shoved out of the strip in favor of Shelley Winters... and yes the name i intentional, not the actress from Cheers but a bubbly red head with a skewed sense of reality and a can do spirit and her two best friends: local layabout with a heart of gold Ryan, one of shelly’s old friends and Amy, the daughter of Shelley’s ex-boss, a sharp tounged young woman with a healthy libidio who grows from a spoiled princess to a responsible buisness owner. The three deal with relationship issues, wacky shenanigans.. and the supernatural stuff that happens in their town of Tackleford because it’s a hub of spoopy shit Just in case you thought it was just his other print works that were kinda weird in comparison to the mostly grounded Giant Days, nope. While his stuff post the original bobbins is well grounded in character work, it’s all got a tinge of weird to it. If you have the time check it out. While some things may fly over your head unless you read the original bobbins, and I strongly suggest you don’t, it’s otherwise a very good read and very much the blue print for his stronger later stuff. 

And as noted it’s from this weird and wonderful early goop we get the protaganist of this book: Esther DeGroot, a perky goth girl who intitally showed up with her best friend Sarah and their muscle Big Lindsay to have LIndsay beat amy into the ground for chatting up a singer they liked. Thankfully she quickly grew out of having her friends beat up college drop outs and instead became a weird, snarky goth and rival to Shelley’s snarky buttoned up sister Erin for the heart of local shy awkard lab assitant Eustace “The Boy” Boyce, himself introduced as fumbling assitant to local inventor and longtime pal of Shelley’s Tim. And you can now see why I had to get into everyone else as SGR’s characters tend to intersect and that web only widens. 

Esther would eventually win, and Erin would eventually end up in hell then forgotten from everyone’s memories shortly after, with Esther and Eustace staying together for the duration of the strip and through many shenanigans and were actually a rather adorable couple. By this time Esther and Eustace were just as much leads as the main three and Esther was a close friend of Ryan’s to the point he and Sarah went out briefly in their Senior Year.. when Sarah was 18 thankfully. Though Ryan did get punched over it by a drunken awkard teenager so things sorted themself out. Big Lindsay quitely disappeared and was revealed to have gottten pregnant. Both would later show up in Giant Days. The strip ended, after a soft launch for the next strip which we’ll get to in a second, with Esther and freinds graduating, Ryan and Sarah breaking up, Shelley leaving town (She’d later return but story for another time), and Ryan and Amy, who had a whole will they or won’t they thing, getting together. 

Allison did this for a reason: He felt Scary Go Round was collapsing under it’s mound of Continuity and thus decided to switch to a fresh cast. Same continuity but with less ties to the old so new readers wouldn’t be turned off. Thus came Bad Machinery. Set up during the waning days of SGR, it followed Sarah’s weird sister Lottie, her sluthy best friend Shauna and a bunch of other bright young kids i’m only not getting into because i’ve introduced enough characters and most of the ones i’ve introduced are either vital to SGR or show up in Giant Days , but are all fantastic, focusing more on the mystery while also having some coming of age stuff of it’s own as by the series end years later, the characters all grew into their late teens. It’s an excellent read and again worth checking out if you haven’t and unlike SGR is in print with the print versions adding more pages to the story and revising bits. I haven’t read them but I intend to eventually because of the revisal, but if you can’t afford them the entire originals are online free. 

Bad Machinery would later be a hit in it’s own right, as the print collections show, but in it’s first years it was actually a shaky proposition to uproot everything, replace almost the entire cast (Though Ryan and Amy, now married, stayed around as supporting cast, with Ryan being the kids teacher and Amy eventually mentoring Shauna), and change the genre from 20 somethings and teens slice of life to a bunch of 11-12 year olds coming of age and solving mysteries. And at first things dipped a bit apparently and Allison panicked and started working on a backup plan. And that backup plan was where Giant Days comes in: A Spinoff following esther and two new characters as they navigate college. He did three self published issues of it, the first put online, before focusing back on bad machinery as it picked up, and many other projects we’ll cover some day. Esther as a result was kinda left in limbo while Erin and Eustace’s stories moved forward. It seemed Esther and her new pals Daisy and Susan were lost to time...

Until 2015 when Allison agreed to do a mini-series for Boom! Studios that picked up where the original series left off, eventually getting picked up as an ongoing that lasted all the way to last month, with 2 winter specials, a one shot trip to Australia, and a final one shot finishing the series Wednesday.  As for said series I do own it, Boom has since republished it, and we will get to it.. but I felt given this is where I and probably most other fans of the series came in, it was the best place to start and issue #1 of the boom series recaps what’s come so far and re-introduces the cast well. Kinda like the second episode of a series after the pilot: some things have changed, including the series now having Artist Lisa Tremain on board to draw instead of Allison himself, some new characters have been added, but it’s still the same show and still a good point to start. And with ALLL that exposition out of the way, including exposition to set up characters for ISSUES down the line, and a little more to go, let’s dig in.  As seen at the top, the first cover is great. The yellow and red works well, as does the simple image of a morose Esther fiddling with her phone, boxing gloves on the back for reasons we’ll see shortly. A good genre setter and an excellent cover, something the series always delivers with. 

We open on our three Heroines, on their third week of college,  with a helpful narration that does a good job summing each up, so I don’t have to and you know how I like to jabber, the giant barrage of paragraphs before should be proof: Naive cheerful Daisy, dramatic and funloving esther, and serious and sardonic Susan. There will be, and already is, more to each as they grow and we learn more, and Esther of course has a few years of comics behind her to start, Giant Days even being named after a Esther and Eustace centric arc from Scary Go Round, but not something I could fit into the exposition wall. 

As you can see the ladies are having a nice talk about if they would be friends without living in the same hall, with Susan bursting Daisy and Esther’s bubble.. but it fits her personality. Susan is a realist, she sees the world how it is. Daisy is an optimist seeing the world how it SHOULD be and Esther navigates the space between, as she can be realistic once in a while but mostly tries to avoid reality like the plauge in this series. She had a tad of this in Scary Go Round but it’s really dialed up here, but there’s a good reason for why i’ll get to after Susan helpfully outlines the indie issues for me and new readers.

See this is why I went here first: while I will cover these issues, themselves covering their first three weeks of college, eventually, it covers most of what happened pretty well and makes it easy to fill in the blanks that it glossed over. The first issue did indeed turn into a scott pilgrim style brawl where Esther boxed her way to victory, Susan set someone on fire and Daisy tried to use meditation to fight but Paul Mcartney’s ghost said no. It’s not a bad issue but tone wise the series would be something much more diffrent. 

Issue 2 is where I need to go into more detail: Esther cheated on Eustace with the douchebag you rightfully see in a heap above, who then spread their night around and got his commupance. Esther told Eustace.. who dumped her over it and drove her into a depressive state, a weird heavy metal society, and booze, which she can drink because you can drink at 18 in England. She was saved from it by her new galpals.. and Erin, who was supposed to likely be a recurring character, possibly on the same level as two we’ll get to soon, and definitely figured into a major plot with Daisy, as Allison admitted. But with the gap between issues and having other plans for Erin, he decided to write her out.  Susan pegs Esther as a drama queen soon after, a “sodding drama magnet”, attracting attention like I attract X-Men comics and Kirk Cameron attracts terrible Christian movies designed to stroke his own ego. She proves this by handing her a piece of paper and well....

Well look on the bright side Esther, you have a good career as the bride of dr.doom with those skills. I mean he’s single, has a spooky castle, does magic.. he’s basically a goth’s wet dream he just needs to black up his uniform a bit. Or put on that awful leather made out of a human armor he had. Yes that was a thing. Comics are weird. 

The rest of the group chase after an angry Esther who after this immortal line, challenges Susan to a bet: if Susan wins she gets a nice massage, if Esther wins she gets to dress Susan up however she likes to torment her.

 And somehow DAISY is the one who has a coming out story in a few issues. Jokes aside I do like the friendship here: They’ll razz each other, give Daisy time, and poke at their flaws gently, or be brutally honest, but their truly and honestly friends and it shows. It feels real and it’s one of the series big draws.  The girls run into Esther’s friend Ed. Ed has a huge crush on Esther, even when she had a boyfriend something to the series credit he was called out on, but not the nerves or charisma to actually try and ask her out. Shockingly, I liked, and still liked, Ed a lot as he reminded me of well.. myself in college. Pining after girls or starring without actually going anywhere and the series will deconstruct this as we go. He’s also basically the fourth main character, getting issues focusing entirely on him and arcs of his own, but the girls are still the main focus. Susan freezes however upon seeing his friend...

This is our fifth lead, McGraw. Basically a more emotive and british Ron Swanson who as you can see clearly has a history with Susan and Susan splits before they can say more. While McGraw falls back on the old men streotype of “We don’t have to talk about it”, though unlike say Tim Taylor it’s less “I genuinely believe this nonsense, as well as that men are  incapable of commuincating unless my neighbor tells me otherwise and all loves sports. I unsuprsingly got divorced once the kids all left the house, aug aug aug”  and more “I don’t want to talk about this nor do I want to force my new friend to talk about a touchy subject yet. “ Susan is likewise closed off but in her own special Susan way and Esther reveling in Susan having drama after accusing her of being a drama queen. This ends about as well as you’d expect. 

Daisy has had best friends for all of three weeks and she’s already figured out lies are a key part of friendship. Good for her. Esther heads off for the Gym, and while Daisy declines due to, and i’m not making this up this is a genuinely good joke of john’s, worrying she’ll become a killing machine. Esther however needs it to work out her feelings over Eustace because punching shit is better than wallowing in her misery over loosing the love of her, at this point, short life. 

That panel on the right... that’s a blessed image. And really this image showcases the true heart of the series: as I said the girls are there for each other but it dosen’t feels schmaltzy or forced, it feels real and has plenty of great lines to add to that. Daisy goes back to try talking to Susan, but Susan takes a bit and when she finally works up the energy to visit daisy. 

I I understand that feeling. It’s like the realization Mr. Rogers had sex at least once. You don’t WANT to know something that pure and innocent is capable of fucking, but you do now and it will haunt you like that ghost that won’t stop stealing my soap. BUY YOUR OWN SOAP JEREMY I’M BROKE SON. Of course this wasn’t actually sex stuff as Susan soon relays to Esther as she fears she upset the poor humanoid afro lesbian. 

Side note I love the phrase having a fiddle and will save it for future use. But yeah with Susan somehow spooked, she suggests Esther change the subject as soon as they get in there. 

Susan.. ya brought this on yourself. Naturally she tries to avoid getting into the subject until eventually this happens. 

I’ll be saving this for future reference of course. And Susan gives us a LITTLE to go on... about two panels worth of ominus foreshadowing to the eventual reveal without any actual info about what in the bloody hell actually happened. 

Of course Susan calls for dinner time and says they’ll have to earn the rest later. Naturaly McGraw is also going in for dinner and Susan once again tries to deflect as her friends bascially call him a snack. I mean he is ron swanson crossbred with berkely brethead. who wouldn’t?

I love the line above.. especially since really the comic DOES pass. While there is boy drama, and girl drama for Daisy, this issue has plenty else going on besides wanting to bang someone, though given Esther won’t shut up about McGraw while talking to the human equilveant of an active volcano.. 

She’s lucky she didn’t instead bash her face in with a tray, but she’s a friend after all. Susan saves the savage beatings for her enemies and McGraw is wise enough to not let his tray anywhere near her and to duck if she tried her own. Natrually given her Drama Magnet powers Esther somehow finds the one cowboy in all of England. 

His chivlary, genuine or dudebro wise unfortunately causes a chain reaction. 

Naturally Susan was hoping for something like this, loudly gloating at activating the drama field and at having won the bet and tries to use the high that being right gives a person to run McGraw out of town. 

Unfortunatley for her, while her speech is awesome i’ll admit, it’s also entirely unfair: She expects him to change schools, and given his focus on architecture and general no nonsense nature he choose this one for a reason. Just because you two have a history dosen’t mean you can just make him leave and McGraw, as seen above, isn’t taking it. And he responds just as badassly. 

Gross? A little. But worth it to basically win the argument without even invoking the fact you have the moral highground. Yeah he had to know she was going here too, but again he came her for a reason and has no reason to leave. She can be an adult about this and work past it or just avoid him, also like an adult. Esther, not wanting to deal with Susan’s smug or her rage both of which are probably ping ponging back and forth, sits with Ed and talks about her dramatic nature. She really dosen’t intend to call it on herself, but does like not knowing what will happen every day. 

This really sums up Esther’s character to start: She enjoys life, loves the hell out of it, but often fails to see the consequences of her actions. The drama field sometimes is just shit happening to her because she happens to be young, attractive and entergetic, but other times it happens, like with the blow up of her relationship, because she does something impulsive and it blows up in her face. Speaking of character insight we get a character defening inner monologue from ed. 

And that’s Ed’s pain:  To Esther she sees it genuinely as him just being her friend. And I do think even with his massive crush he genuinely cares about her more than just wanting to be with her, but worried she’ll reject him, as I can again relate. And even worse is the worry of not wanting to make their friendship weird. And i’ve had crushes on female friends that have gone both ways: it’s made things toow eird to continue, but i’ve also had plenty where I was gently turned down and we’re still on good terms to this day. One of my best friends was a result of this. What makes it work, when we’ve seen this plot a thousand times before, is that both the narrative and Ed don’t think he’s ENTITLED to Esther. Yes the above has him asking god to make her love him.. but it’s not in a forceful sense.. it comes off more as a desperate want for them to end up together or for him to be able to move on. It’s what seperates ed from a “nice guy”: Sure he’s into Esther, but he dosen’t think he deserves her, or that because their friends he’s earned her or any such nonsensical bullshit. He’s just hopelesly infatuated with the first girl he met in college and wants to either see where it goes, or have the feelings end so he can move on with someone he does have a future with. I”ve been there. Shit sucks and Allison handles it well without falling into entitlement territory, and given just HOW many geek gets the girl storylines have been written, having it treated realistically with it being treated with him having to get over her instead of her just being oblvious is refreshing and I wish i’d had a narrative like this when I was Ed’s age to smack me in the face and tell me “No it dosen’t work that way, say something or move on man. “ With that monster of a pargraph done let’s check back with the girls. 

Again, I love the character interactions and how that’s the focus here over anything else, even my word sandwitch up there. But speaking of things, Esther just up and asks Daisy what she was watching. Turns out...

Yup, Daisy just likes ASMR, which I now know just what it is, just a static reflex people get. Susan tests it to prove Daisy is normal and it’s just good clean fun. Esther tries to put nosepicking under the same, Elbow’s susan over it and we get this to close out our main trio for the issue. 

I am glad he showed off more lady friendships, but they would’ve been a hell of a couple had Allison went that way. Could be an intresting AU, especailly if you keep Daisy gay and have their being bi or pan, dealers choice, affect things. HOw would that effect their relationshpis, how long would it last, would the McGraw thing impact stuff.. it’s some food for thought is all i[’m saying. We close however on Ed and McGraw as Ron Jr. unpacks his stuff and helps ed with his key sticking by rubbing a pencil on it because Graphite is a lubricant. Huh. Neat. And then we end on this. 

And on that note, we end issue 1. No write in contests though i’m damn sure given he’s mentioned he’d want a ROM/Giant Days crossover for the absurdity John Allison would love that. 

Final Thoughts;  An excellent start to the BOOM! series and a good second pilot. It’s clear stuff happened but the series helps you get the gist well enough to not have to buy the collection of the first three issues, and the characters are all dynamic with plenty of laughs as well as genuine moments. Susan and Esther’s banter is hilarious and both Esther and Susan are given plenty of layers: Esther’s grappling with her sorrow over her nuking her first romance and Susan being sharp witted, quick to be smug with Esther, but still gentle with Daisy and trying to careful with her given her sheltered life before College. Daisy isn’t given much layers in this issue, but is sitll shown to be incredibly sweet and realstically naive. McGraw is a welcome addition, his past with susan providing an intresting mystery for what was intended to be just 6 issues and solved by the end, while also having some intresting swagger to him enough to not make him JUST her love intrest or Ed’s best friend. Tremain’s art is also great, diffrent than what most of the series would end up being, a bit sketchier with more dot eye, but still nice and stylish. I’ll also confess the cafeteria scene is what let me know the book existed as I read it in the back of another boom title, I can’t remember which honestly, wher eit was featured as a preview and was intstantly intrigued. Overall a strong start. There’s a reason the series both caught on and lasted as long as it did and i’ll miss it terribly. I won’t be reviewing as time goes by this week, though I may post some quick thoughts on it, but I intend to review the full series, including the 3 indie issues and specials, so i’ll probably get to it at some point. An excellent series that I can’t recommend enough. 

If you liked this review, feel free to reblog it, follow me for more, or comisson one for a comic of your choice for just 5 bucks. Until then, have some giant days of your own. 

[taexual]

EXO / Adopting a dog together

REQUESTS: Buying a dog with Exo?🐶

could you please do something with exo ot9 about raising a big dog together?

BTS version of this request is HERE

Xiumin

The most difficult decision you and Minseok ever had to make in your relationship was choosing if you wanted to adopt a cat or a dog. After a long and thorough consideration, during which, both of you presented your points, you went ahead and got a puppy while Minseok was in the studio. Perhaps it was playing dirty but you were certain he would fall in love with the fluffy little creature when he met it.

“Y/n?” Minseok called out after he came home from work and didn’t find you in the bedroom. “I can hear weird noises, is everything okay?”

The weird noises he mentioned had to be the sound of the newest addition to your family, who would not stop barking as you tried to get him into the tub so you could wash him.

Finally, after wandering around your apartment in search of you, Minseok opened the bathroom to see you struggling to keep the hyperactive puppy inside of the tub as you attempted to wash the dirt off its fur.

“Y/n, w-what?” Minseok asked, causing you to turn around with wide eyes.

“I didn’t hear you come home,” you said, not having planned to introduce the puppy to him like that.

The one moment that you looked away from the puppy, however, was enough for him to jump out of the tub and run straight to Minseok, resting his wet upper paws on his knees, immediately expecting belly rubs from this stranger. Minseok, a little – okay, a lot – taken aback, squatted slightly, to scratch the ears of the furry animal in front of him.

“We have a dog, huh?” Minseok said, giving you a small smile to show you that he wasn’t angry about this.

“Yeah,” you said awkwardly. “He’s our child now. We can’t give him back anymore.”

Minseok laughed, enjoying the way the puppy kept licking his hands whenever he allowed him to.

“Our son,” Minseok repeated, stopping the scratching and immediately having the puppy jump on him. He laughed again, almost losing his balance, and then winked at you. “He seems like a little troublemaker. Must have gotten that from you.”

Suho

Junmyeon wanted to get a dog as much as you did and the only thing that stopped him from doing so right away was the issue of looking after it. He didn’t want you to have to take care of the dog all on your own.

“Y/n, I don’t want you to have full responsibility,” he said to you, in a voice so serious, you thought he was going to break up with you. “The dog is both of ours. We should care for it equally. And yet, I feel as if I’d neglect it.”

You almost laughed in relief as the topic turned to the dog you were supposed to get. “Junmyeon, I think we should look at the dog as our companion, not our child.”

“Our—oh,” he considered this. “Oh, okay. That actually sounds better. We’d still have to walk it though, and I’m away a lot.”

“That’s okay,” you shrugged your shoulders, not seeing the problem. “I can walk him when you’re not here. He can be my little supportive friend – or, big supportive friend – while you’re not here.”

“I like the sound of that,” he nodded. “As long as I don’t become second to the dog. I know I’m asking for a lot here, I know how much dogs mean to you, but really. I need some cuddles, too.”

You laughed at this. “You know I love you. You can get a belly rub anytime you want.”

Junmyeon burst out laughing at this and it took him about two minutes to calm down and brush the tears away.

“Okay,” he finally said. “That sounds fair. We’re getting a dog as long as you promise to love us both equally.”

“I promise,” you said, almost laughing, too. “Have you thought about what kind of dog you’d like?”

“Honestly, I’m good with anything,” Junmyeon replied. “Let’s let the dog choose us instead.”

Lay

It took you about three whole months to convince Yixing to get a dog. He wanted a pet with you, he really did, but he wasn’t sure if adopting one was a good idea since he had to travel a lot, and you were busy, too. Finally, you managed to talk him into at least visiting the shelter, claiming you didn’t have to adopt yet, you could just look around.

Yeah, right.

“Oh, Y/n! Look! That little puppy was eyeing me ever since I entered the store,” Yixing exclaimed cheerfully, pointing at a cage with chocolate labrador puppies. “It must like me. Hey, little guy!”

You smiled involuntarily at the sight of your boyfriend – who was hesitant about getting a dog – attempting to pet the puppy by sticking his hand into the cage. All four of the puppies inside of the cage swarmed to Yixing immediately, making him laugh in delight.

“Looks like they all like you,” you said. “Which is, of course, not shocking at all, since you’re you.”

“They are too cute,” Yixing said. “Do you think it’s possible for us to take all four of them home with us?”

You raised your eyebrows in surprise. “Like, at once? To keep them? All four of them?”

“I’m sensing you’re about to say no.”

“I would never do that,” you disagreed. “It’d be cruel to separate them from each other. And, anyway, how could we even choose one? Possible or not, we have to take all four.”

Yixing was smiling as he listened to you talk while watching the four puppies compete for his touch inside of the cage. He had completely forgotten he only came here to look around.

“Do you see that one, who won’t stop wagging his tail?” he asked you, suddenly.

“Yeah, why?”

“He has a small golden patch on his ear. He’s so precious. I already have a name for him.”

“We need to discuss this,” you warned, knowing what “name” he was going to choose. “You can’t just choose a name for him on your own.”

“Sheep,” Yixing said, completely ignoring everything you’ve said. “His name is Sheep. Let’s get those adoption papers ready so we can take him and his brothers home.”

Baekhyun

Baekhyun fit right in with the dogs at the animal shelter that the two of you have stopped at on your way home from your date night. It was a purely spontaneous decision and yet, despite only dating for eight months, Baekhyun was already trying to adopt a dog with you.

“Look at that one!” he pointed at a yet another dog, having a breakdown about this one, too. “Look at his little floppy ears!”

You laughed, his enthusiasm brushing off on you. “Or that one! Look how big his eyes are!”

“Ah, Y/n, you’re killing me. We have to adopt one.”

“How would that work?” you asked. “I mean, I love dogs, really, but--”

“We could share it. I’d take the dog every second day of the week and you could keep it for the rest of it,” Baekhyun suggested. “We spend the weekends together anyway, so it won’t be a problem.

“Won’t that put the dog in a lot of anxiety?” you mentioned. “It probably won’t like being separated from either one of us once it gets attached.”

Baekhyun thought about this. “You’re right. We should just move in together.”

This took you off guard and you pulled away from one of the dogs whose ears you’ve been scratching, focusing your attention on your boyfriend. “What?”

“Yeah,” he shrugged his shoulders. “Why not? We’d save the poor dog from separation anxiety and we’d get to spend more time together. If anything, I’d say it’s a win-win kind of situation.”

Your heart was basically beating out of your chest now.

“I-I don’t know,” you stammered, struggling to find the words to say. This was definitely not a decision you could just make on the spot. “Shouldn’t we think about it first?”

“What is there to think about?” Baekhyun said, carefully picking one of the nearest puppies up and putting its face next to his. “Come on, Y/n. Can you really say no to this face?”

He smiled widely as he said this, and suddenly, you weren’t sure which face he meant - his or the dog’s he was holding. You found it difficult to say no to either one of them, though.

“This is blackmail,” you said, sighing. “And I can’t believe it’s working.”

Chen

Jongdae loved it when you sent him random pictures of dogs you found cute - he also adored the way you captured every one of those pictures with, “this one looks like you” - so he didn’t think twice when one of his friends told him that his dog just had puppies and he didn’t know what to do with them. Jongdae suggested adopting the puppies and he returned home with three new friends that same night.

“Dae?” you called out from your bedroom, alarmed to hear odd yelping follow the sound of someone closing the front door. “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, absolutely!” Jongdae answered. “Actually, Y/n, could you come here for a bit? I could use some help.”

“Help with wh--” words got caught in your throat as you exited the bedroom to see Jongdae struggle to balance the three Dalmatian puppies in his arms. “Wh-what? Are those..? Where did you..?”

“They’re ours!” Jongdae answered you, even though you haven’t managed to finish any of your questions due to the shock. “Can you take that one from me though? She’s about to fall onto the floor and I’m not sure how good dogs are at landing on their feet.”

Still confused, you moved closer to him and grabbed the poor puppy from him before it could hurt itself. “How’d they get here? And what do you mean they’re ours?”

“It’s a long story, I’ll explain everything later,” he said. “In the meantime, do you think you can look after them while I run to the store to get them something to eat? They’re probably starving.”

“Jongdae, you can’t leave me with three random dogs and just run off without explaining anything.”

“Right. But they’re not random dogs, they’re ours. I got them for us.”

You watched him, unblinking. “You literally went ahead and got us dogs without telling me anything?”

The enthusiasm faltered from Jongdae’s voice a little, “Yeah…”

“Well,” you took a deep breath, brushing your hand against the black and white fur of the puppy in your arms. “This might be the best decision you’ve ever made.”

“Yes!” Jongdae exclaimed, his previous wide smile returning to his face again. “But I do think the best decision I’ve ever made was starting to date you. Getting us dogs is definitely the second best, though.”

Chanyeol

Chanyeol listened to you talk his ear off about how your friend had adopted a dog but he would not take the hint until you outright told him that you wanted a dog, too. And even then, he assumed you were joking. When he left on tour and you sent him pictures of you, cradling a puppy in your arms, however, he realized you were serious.

“Y/n,” he said over the phone to you, having called you immediately after he saw the photographs. “Where did you get that dog?”

“My friend knows some people,” you said simply. “Isn’t it cute? His name is Steve Rogers, apparently - yes, I know - and his previous owners just dropped him on the street. The pure creature wandered aimlessly for days it seems, until those people found him. They were looking for a home for him and, well, we have a home.”

“Uh, yeah. We do have a home,” Chanyeol said, sounding a bit distraught. “S-so, he’s ours now?”

“Yeah. We have a four-legged roommate,” you said, biting your lip. “Is that okay?”

“The fact that you basically saved a dog? Yeah, of course. It’s great,” he said. “But the fact that you got a dog without me? No, not really. I’m kind of upset.”

“Oh,” you hesitated for a moment. “I’m sorry. Steve was too cute to resist.”

“Ste--oh, the dog. Right,” Chanyeol said. “Can we rename him? Because I swear, it’s going to give me a heart attack whenever I’ll hear you mention someone named Steve.”

You laughed. “What would you want to call him, then?”

“Well, Tony is a nice name.”

“Oh, so Steve is bad, but Tony works?” you asked skeptically. “Your hatred for Captain America couldn’t be more obvious.”

“I don’t hate him but he’s no Iron Man,” Chanyeol said, sighing. “But okay, fine. He can be Steve Rogers. Do you think we should get more dogs, so we could have our own Avengers?”

D.O.

“Soo!” you called out to him after having gotten back home to your shared apartment but not fully walking inside yet. “Could you come out here?”

“Yeah, Y/n?” Kyungsoo answered, entering the hallway and noticing the way you stood still halfway out the door, your hands behind you. “Is… everything okay?”

“Yeah, no, everything’s perfect!” you said quickly, glancing behind your shoulder momentarily until your eyes met the terrified ones of the puppy on the leash behind you. You turned back to look at Kyungsoo with a wide, hopeful smile on your face. “So, listen. I have some news.”

“Do you, uh, have to give them to me with one foot out the door?” he asked you, crossing his arms over his chest.

“No. But that’s how I’m keeping you in suspense and--”

Your words got interrupted when a yelp - caused very obviously by the big dog of your neighbors’ that just stuck his snout out of the apartment next-door - sounded from behind you, and, next thing you know, the puppy ran inside of the apartment, pulling you with him by the leash. The poor thing only stopped running once he reached Kyungsoo. Clearly, the spot next to him must have meant safety.

“Well, ta-da! I guess,” you said, biting your lip. “That’s the news.”

Kyungsoo turned around, squatting in front of the shaking body of the puppy.

“Wow,” he breathed, carefully extending his hand and letting the dog sniff him. Once the puppy licked his palm in approval, Kyungsoo slowly brought his hand through its fur. “You got a dog?”

“I got us a dog,” you said, smiling softly as you watched the two of them get acquainted. “My friend is volunteering at a shelter and I stopped by to visit her today. She told me one of the dogs had puppies but no one wanted them because they weren’t purebred. Now, my friend took two of them but she already had two dogs before, so she asked me if I’d like this one and, well…”

“You just took him,” Kyungsoo said, as the puppy flopped on its back, clearly asking for a belly rub. “Sorry, you took her. Does she have a name?”

“No, but she really reminded me of you,” you said. “When I tried to take her home, she scared three cats away just by looking at them.”

Kyungsoo glared at you - proving your point - and then shook his head. “Well, if she’s that much like me, then she has to stay. Birds of feather flock together.”

Kai

Obviously, Jongin’s life wouldn’t have been the same if he didn’t have dogs. You shared exactly the same attitude and that had to be what drew you to each other. The two of you had a tradition of having doggy play dates every Saturday and that tradition has been strong for all of the two years that the two of you were together.

“You know what I think,” Jongin said one sunny Saturday as you strolled down the park, your dogs tugging on your leashes. “I think we should get a dog together.”

You glanced at him, somewhat surprised. “Really? You don’t think the two dogs you have, and the other two I have, are enough?”

He smiled, shaking his head. “There can never be enough dogs.”

“There can be a limited amount of space, though,” you said. “I don’t want the dogs to feel crowded. And, besides, how would we split the new dog?”

“We wouldn’t,” Jongin said. “We’d find a place to live with the dogs. With a big yard. Oh, and a pool!”

As of right now, both of you often stayed at each other’s places, not yet having thought of really moving in together but now that Jongin brought it up, you realized it might have been the sensible thing to do.

“Okay,” you said. “Maybe we’ve reached that point in our relationship where we have to get a dog together.”

“Oh, I have an idea!” Jongin said, jumping up in excitement suddenly. “What if we got a dog for every anniversary? It could be another one of our traditions.”

“Uh…” you did some calculations in your head. “That would mean that by our tenth anniversary, we’d have eight new dogs.”

He shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t see how that’s a bad thing. We’re great people. The dogs love us and we love them back.”

“I can’t argue with that logic.”

“Great,” Jongin said, placing an arm on your shoulders and pulling your body closer to his as the two of you continued your walk, dogs all around you. “We’re the absolute best couple in the world.”

Sehun

“I just don’t think I’m ready for that kind of commitment,” Sehun said to you as you dragged him to the animal shelter you’ve accidentally stumbled upon a few days ago. You really wanted to show your boyfriend the dog you saw there but he was resisting.

“We don’t have to get it, you just have to look at it,” you insisted, opening the door of the shelter and pushing him inside before he could run away.

Sehun didn’t hate animals, he was just convinced that he didn’t have time to get a pet, let alone take care of it, especially without the help of his family who could look after the animal if he wasn’t able to. You, however, were a firm believer that a person could do anything as long as he wanted it enough. And Sehun needed a little push to understand just how much he wanted a new dog.

“Look, there it is,” you pointed at a black poodle crossbreed. “The owner of the shelter told me that she’s only two years old, but she’s been deaf since she was a puppy, and that’s why her owners gave her away. Oh, look how excited she is to see you!”

Your encouragement was no longer necessary because as soon as Sehun noticed the way the dog’s eyes lit up at the sight of him, he was already sold. A small smile spread across his face as he slowly extended a hand to touch the soft fur of the animal, and you could see Sehun melt once the dog approached him, gratefully licking his hand.

“How could anyone give her away?” he asked in disbelief. “She’s so sweet.”

“People are cruel,” you replied. “But, anyway, she’s been in this shelter for over a year. No other animal has been here that long. The owner said he’s convinced no one will ever take her, and I’m not just saying that to convince you that we need to take her, I’m just… I’m just saying. This poor dog doesn’t deserve this.”

“You’re right, she doesn’t,” Sehun said decidedly. “We have to take her. And I’m not just saying that because I can’t get my hand out of her cage because she’s so soft.”

“Really?” you asked, your eyes lighting up as you chose to ignore the way he played with your words, having obviously suspected that you only told him this story in order to convince him to get the dog.

“Really,” he confirmed. “You probably wouldn’t have had to tell me anything. Just by looking at her I could tell she belongs with us. Our very first child. Oh, this is a heart-wrenching moment.”

“Well, then stop saying it in this voice or I’ll cry,” you hit him on the shoulder. “Come on, let’s find the owner so we can tell him she’s finally going home.”

i don’t own any of the gifs posted. credits go to the original owners of the gifs.

masterlist / ask (requests are closed)

[pinkletterday]

Notorious

Pairing: Barry Allen/ Iris West.

Rating: Teen

Warnings: drug use, addiction

Status: WiP

Summary: Iris West reluctantly faces the challenge of her career as a publicist - saving up and coming alt-rock sensation Barry Allen's career from himself.

"People like notoriety. Studios don't like uninsurable flight risks. The money is in the sweet spot between the two."

Prompt taken from this post and altered.

"Hi, I'm gonna kill you."

Iris's boss, Leonard Snart, swivelled in his chair to face her as she stormed into his office, heedless of the transparency of its walls.

"Good morning to you too, Iris," he said wryly. "I wouldn't mind if you do kill me, I have meeting with Accounting in ten minutes. But why am I to be executed?"

"Why would you put me on the Allen account?" Iris demanded, eyes flashing angrily under wide-rimmed glasses. "More importantly, why am I being taken off the Queen one? I brought in that client, Len! And now you want me to baby-sit ANOTHER self-aggrandizing man-child AFTER I helped QC Records pull off a complete image revamp?"

"We're a entertainment PR firm, West, they're all self-aggrandizing man-children. We'd be out of business if they weren't," Len waved her away and went back to collecting his papers. "And I put you on the Allen account because Oliver Queen likes you."

"What?" Iris stopped, non-plussed.

"When you pull off the impossible, people reward you by giving you something more impossible," said Len in his usual air of imparting some grand wisdom upon the newbies. It did nothing to assuage Iris's bad humour. "You got the public to see young Ollie Queen, heedless playboy in the club scene, as a savvy charismatic businessman able to lead his father's empire without running it to the ground. Now he wants you to do the same for his good buddy Barry Allen."

"Why didn't he just ask me?" said Iris, only slightly mollified.

"Probably didn't want to be around for the kicking and screaming," said Len, leaning his head sardonically at her. Iris flushed. Snart was such an asshole. "And don't worry, Queen's paying the retainer fee."

"Why is Oliver paying for Allen?" she determinedly strode behind him as he headed out to the elevator. "Barry Allen's already got two singles in the Billboard Top 40 and a contract with QC. Can't he afford to pay us himself?"

"Ah, there's the rub, darling," Len smirked at her. "Part of the deal is that you convince young Mr. Allen that he needs you. And judging by the recent tabloid coverage - boy, he really does need you."

Iris stared at him. "You can't be serious. He doesn't even want a - Len, he needs rehab not a publicist!"

"No reason why he shouldn't have both," said Len stepping into the elevator as she stood outside, stupefied in disbelief. "Don't worry, Iris. I have every faith in you." The elevator doors closed on her boss's infuriating Chesire cat grin.

"I don't even know anything about alt-rock!" she yelled fruitlessly at the closed steel doors.

"So, I guess this is a bad time to tell you I got the QC account," Sara approached waving a folder at her, her expression not much less disgruntled than hers. "Any tips on how to handle Queen?"

"Yeah," said Iris, pivoting angrily on her heel and marching away. "Kick his fucking ass."

***

For someone with a talent for both music and being splashed across the tabloids, Barry Allen had a rather unconventional arrangement. He was not represented by any major talent agency, even Snart Associates was more entertainment-corporate oriented than talent. He had been "managed" this far by a personal friend in the music industry, a Cisco Ramon, whose own success had made it impossible to focus on Allen's. Iris figured that some well-meaning yet complicated friend negotiations had taken place behind the artist's back for this clusterfuck to land on her desk. She fumed. She was a professional. Even when she had had to contend with Oliver Queen at his worst (the fact that much of the worst had been a ruse was small consolation) it had been saving of the company she had been tasked with. She hadn't gotten an MBA on her own money by twenty-four while working her way up from a mailroom to end up playing nurse maid to entitled white boys.

It was her ire that made her square her shoulders, wipe the sneer off her face and beard the proverbial lion in his den alone. Ramon had asked her to wait for him outside the unimpressive square brick building in a bad part of town ("probably to fit his boho aesthetic," Iris thought uncharitably) but he was now ten minutes late, so screw him.

There was no security or buzzer at the entrance so Iris was able to simply walk into the alarmingly large and clanky elevator that took her upto where Allen lived on the top floor. She stepped into a hall of bare brick with thick wooden sliding door staring at her. There was no buzzer to be seen here either. Iris was about to bang on the door when it opened by itself.

"- all right, fine, I'll let myself out, you jerk. Thanks for the sex and the coffee, I guess!" an irate blonde in dishevelled clothing appeared in front of her, coat and one heel still in hand, facing away to yell at the occupant. She turned around, came face to face with Iris and stepped back in surprise. "Who're you?"

Iris stared awkwardly at her. "Um."

She snorted. "Yeah okay, whatever, good luck." With which ominous benediction she pulled on her shoe and clattered down the stairs, apparently unwilling to wait for the elevator.

"Hey Kathy - Katya - whoever - could you close the door please? Thanks!" called a male voice.

Iris stepped in and complied.

The studio was kind of a bachelor cliché, bare brick, high ceilings, stainless steel counters and leather sofas. A vague smell of weed hung stale in the air. Dull grey sunlight flooded in from the large square windows overlooking the brick and mortar part of the warehouse district, on which gentrification had not encroached. A sad little pocket of impersonal luxury in a sadder, almost forgotten place.

A tall, lanky white man in a tattered tee shirt sat in profile at the far end, eschewing the sprawling sofa behind him in favour of sitting on the floor rug in a tangle of long legs, intermitently strumming on a guitar and scribbling on a note pad on a coffee table strewn with mugs, cans and paper.

"Mr. Allen?" she said tentatively.

His head whipped up, startled. "Huh? Who're you?"

"My name is Iris West. Oliver Queen sent me," said Iris, brisk and no-nonsense, adjusting her glasses.

He blinked slowly at her. Then a lazy grin came over his face. "And here I thought Ollie wasn't gonna send me strippers anymore," he said, eyeing her appreciatively, "he still definitely knows my type."

Iris gaped at him. "I am not a stripper!"

"Oh," he looked befuddled. "I'm sorry, but he really has sent me strippers before and one of them was actually dressed all school-teacherish like you - um. Although come to think of it, he hasn't done that in a few years. Sorry, um. Did uh, the other lady leave?"

"Yeah, she left just as I came in," Iris felt even more nonplussed, no idea which end of that ramble she was supposed to start with. He rubbed the back of his neck and looked around blinking as though not sure of his own surroundings. Or what time it was. Possibly which year.

"Are you high?" It was only ten in the morning, Jesus Christ.

"Um. Only on coffee. And Redbull. Lots of Redbull," he said, going back to work as though her presence in his apartment was not really of much concern to him. "Sex really gives me an endorphin rush and I had this idea - couldn't really go back to sleep after that. I think I made Katya -uh, the girl - mad. I just really need to focus, y'know? Like, if I don't it get done while I'm in the zone I can't ever get it back again?" He never tooked up, talking as though mostly to himself.

Iris approached him cautiously. "Huh. Well, coffee and Rebull I can work with. As long as it's not coke or something."

"Out of Coke. Might have some Pepsi," said Allen absently.

"I meant cocaine."

"Yeah, out of that too."

Iris breathed out slowly.

"Uh, so if Ollie didn't send you, why are you here?" Allen looked up at her, finally seeming to register that this vital question had gone unanswered.

"I said Mr. Queen did send me," she said patiently. "I'm your new publicist.

"Oh." Allen absorbed this. Then closed his eyes, hummed and began strumming his guitar.

Iris felt a headache building behind her eyeballs. "Mr. Allen? Did you not hear what I said?"

"I did, thank you," said Allen, "but I don't need a publicist. I'm sorry you wasted your time."

"I'm sorry about that too," said Iris, temper flaring out her nostrils, "but I am used to being treated with respect, client or not. Something apparently neither you, Oliver Queen or even Mr. Ramon seems capable of."

To her surprise, Allen's eyes flew open and he seemed genuinely dismayed. "Oh. You're right. I called you a - and then. Oh my God I'm sorry," he scrambled up, coltish legs unfolding almost comically to reveal himself a full head taller than her, pale and almost gangly but for an unconscious grace. "Um, please take a seat. Can I get you a drink? I can make more coffee. What do you mean Ollie and Cisco were rude to you?"

She stared after him as he bustled over to the kitchen island at the other end of the studio. Her past experience with Queen's associates and the tabloids had prepared her for a womanizing druggie manchild. It wasn't that Barry Allen had unchecked any of those boxes, exactly. Just kept checking them slightly to the left of where she expected.

"Well for one, Mr. Queen didn't notify me of my change in clients himself, and Mr. Ramon is now fifteen minutes late to our meeting," Iris slung her coat over a barstool and firmly sat herself on another, emanating a stern "will not be dislodged" aura, "I haven't had a briefing and also been told that I have to convince you to let me be your publicist. This is beyond professional discourtesy."

"Agreed on all counts," said Allen, smiling ruefully at her over the sink where he was rinsing the coffee pot. Unbecoming scruff aside, it was a very cute and disarming smile. "I'm sure Cisco has a good explanation, but I'm afraid Oliver is just an asshole like that."

"Believe me, I know," Iris snorted.

Allen's amusement deepened. "You aren't worried about calling your client an asshole in front of his friend?"

"I've called him worse things over the last year," she rolled her eyes, "and I can promise you I am going to call him many things as soon as his plane lands and he turns his phone on. I worked my ass off to save his company. I thought that meant something to him." The hurt she had been trying to ignore twinged despite herself. She had thought, after everything, that she and Oliver were at least friends.

Allen snapped his fingers in realization. "Oh, hey! I know who you are! Oliver talked about you all last year!"

"He did?"

"Yeah! Mostly complaining," (Iris snorted) "but in an impressed, complimentary way, you know?" Allen leaned his elbows on the counter and bent toward her with earnest blue eyes.

"I can imagine," she smiled wryly. "And he signed on with me willingly."

"Well, he got his money's worth. People finally get to see him like I've always seen him - not just a selfish party animal. You've done good work, Miss...?" he trailed off uncertainly again.

"West," she reasserted. "But you don't feel in need of my services?"

A distant door shut behind Allen's open, friendly eyes. "No, Miss West, I don't. It's not a reflection on you, it's just personal reasons."

Iris shrugged. "All right."

This seemed to surprise him. "Really? You aren't going to try to persuade me?"

"Do you want to be persuaded?"

"Well, no. I just thought -"

"Mr. Allen," Iris rubbed the headache away from her eyes, "a publicist is an integral, almost invasive presence in a company or someone's life. I need to know who you are, I need you to trust me so that you will come to me with everything and anything so that I can head off any media shitstorms or rumour mills, I need you ready and willing to take my advice on important life choices. I can't force my way into that position. Either you really want to rework your image or you don't."

"Why do I need to rework my image?" said Allen, blue eyes growing stormy. "I'm a musician. It would be weird if I weren't into sex and drugs."

"Sex and drugs, yes. Not making a fool of yourself by turning up high for your Jimmy Fallon interview, being arrested for solicitation and making it plain to the world that you are one drunken orgy away from an OD."

Allen was quiet as he poured the coffee into mugs. They were gaudy novelty ones with silly puns, incongrous with the sobriety of his interior decor. He slid one over without looking at her. She wondered whether he had deliberately chosen the bright-eyed unicorn saying "Go To Hell" in rainbow colors for her, but then he had his (long, graceful) hands wrapped around a mug where a slice of cheese announced "We'd be gouda together!" so she let it slide. "It doesn't matter," he said quietly.

"Oliver's been bailing you out of your worst jams, but now he's under extra scrutiny by the board. He can't keep you signed on for another album, even with two hit singles, if you look like you're going to be more trouble than you're worth."

Iris regretted saying it so baldly when she saw Allen flinch.

"I'm making trouble for Ollie?" He said it in a small, lost sort of way that made Iris feel like she'd kicked a puppy.

"I'm saying you're probably making life pretty difficult for him at the moment, yeah," she ploughed on, determined. "And that's probably why he hired me. Besides the fact that he obviously cares about you."

Allen peered quizzically at her over the rim of his mug. "Oliver talked to you about me?"

She snorted. "Yeah no. Cagey as hell, that guy. That's kind of how I know. The closer he is to someone, the less he talks about them. The opposite of the rest of the world."

"So you know he cares about me because he never talked to you about me?" Allen grinned as she drank her coffee. Her amazing, rich, life-giving coffee.

"That, and another thing."

"What's that?"

Weak silver sunshine cast half Barry Allen's lean, stupidly tall frame in shadow. It turned one of his eyes a light hazel and one side of his stubbly, hollowed cheek marble pale as he smiled down at her, both beautiful and uncanny.

I saw the financials for the out-of-court settlements he'd made to keep you off the news, for what good it did. If even one of them had been for sexual harrassment I wouldn't have touched either Queen's account or yours. I told him to void your contract last year and he shut me down. You have no idea how hard he's working to save you.

Iris grinned back. "He gave you the best damn publicist he had ever met."

***

[im-fairly-whitty]

The Way You Keep Me Guessing: Coco Teacher!AU

@slusheeduck and I are co-authoring this Coco teacher!AU story together, alternating every chapter or so. (AU started by @scribblrhob) 

[Part 1: Unexpected Responsibility] [Part 2: La Directora] [Part 3: Skipping Class] [Part 4: An Unannounced Visitor]

Part 5: The Roommate

“Alright Cruzcitos, hopefully you enjoyed that new song! Be sure to like and subscribe to-”

Miguel paused the youtube video on his phone, swiped back the progress bar to the beginning of the video, then propping the small screen back on the bookshelf in front of him.

He picked up his old practice guitar again and scooted forward on the floor as Cruz, the coolest guitar player on the whole internet, began playing Duet Through Time for what was probably the fifty or sixtieth time that afternoon.

Miguel squinted, biting his lip as he watched Cruz’s finger positioning, mimicking it on the neck of his own guitar. He followed the first few measures fine enough, but when Cruz effortlessly trilled through a cascade of notes Miguel’s fingers fumbled, bumping clumsily into the strings.

Miguel huffed in annoyance as Cruz played on. He reached over and swiped back to the beginning of the song, adjusting an earbud with his other hand. He’d been working to get that trill right for nearly half an hour already and was determined to get it right even if it killed him.

He’d discovered Cruz’s channel a few months ago and had combed through the entire playlist, skipping over all the boring talking videos to find and save the guitar playing ones. Sometimes Tio Hector was too busy doing teacher stuff to practice with Miguel in the evenings, so trying to imitate his new musical idol was Miguel’s backup. At least Cruz didn’t make Miguel play dumb scales a million times every time he practiced.

“-room?”

“What?” Miguel said, pulling out his earbuds and looking up to see Imelda putting a book onto a higher shelf.

“I asked if you’d already gotten all of your things out of Ernesto’s room?” She repeated, picking up several magazines near Miguel and setting them neatly on the coffee table.

“Yeah, I got it all out.” Miguel said, it had taken him forever to gather up all his legos from the second bedroom Tio Hector had been letting him play in. “Do you need any other help cleaning?”

Imelda and Hector had been straightening things all afternoon, preparing for the return of Hector’s roommate, someone named Ernesto, who apparently was kinda a clean freak. Hopefully Ernesto wouldn’t be mad that the extra room “Ernesto’s studio,” as Hector called it, was now being used as Miguel’s bedroom.

“No, I think we’re about done,” Imelda said, putting her hands on her hips and surveying the freshly picked up apartment. “I think this is as good as it’s going to get. I’m going to make myself a quesadilla, would you like one?”

“Si, por favor!” Miguel said, smiling up at her.

“I’ll take one too!” Tio Hector called from the back room.

“I wasn’t asking you,” Imelda called back as she walked to the small kitchen, “you can make your own snack.”

Miguel giggled as he turned back to his phone. It had been a little weird when Imelda had started visiting their apartment, but now Miguel looked forward to it. Besides getting to eat food that wasn’t burnt, having her over also meant Hector sang and joked all evening instead of doing boring stuff, like falling asleep on the couch while grading papers.

“But you made me one the other day?” Hector said, walking down the hall to lean in the kitchen doorway, an exaggerated pout on his face.

“Exactly, I need to stop before you think you can depend on me for all your quesadilla needs.” Imelda said, swatting at Hector with a hand towel as she walked past him to the fridge.

Miguel rolled his eyes as hard as he could as he put his earbuds back in. Tio Hector and Imelda kept saying that they were “only friends,” that Imelda kept coming over more and more frequently because she wanted to check on him, but Miguel knew they were both liars. He knew what flirting was. After all, he’d seen it whenever Mamá and Papá had been gross and kissed and stuff.

Miguel bit his lip, hard. He hadn’t meant to think about his parents.

He pulling his guitar closer to his chest, squeezing his eyes shut and waiting for the empty pain inside to go away. He wasn’t going to cry. The school counselor said crying was normal, that he should cry if he wanted to, but he knew that crying was for babies.

Besides, if he cried then Hector would get sad too, which would make it even worse.

“-come in.”

“What?” Miguel said, quickly wiping at his nose as he pulled out his earbuds, trying to seem as normal as possible as he looked around at Hector.

“I was just saying Ernesto’s about to come in,” Hector repeated. He was staring at his phone with a slightly long-suffering expression, “and he says that he’s going to be filming, so he wants all of us to “act natural” for his end-of-tour video.”

“His what?” Miguel asked.

“You still let his videos hijack your life like that?” Imelda said, turning on the stove and looking disapprovingly at Hector over her shoulder. “Please tell me he’s going on tour again soon?”

“Oh be nice.” Hector said, smiling wryly, “it’s really not that bad once you get used to it.”

Miguel looked towards the front door as the doorknob rattled with the sound of someone fumbling to get a key in the lock.

“That’s because you’ve been desensitized from overexposure to ego.” Imelda said dryly.

“But why is he filming?” Miguel asked, but before anyone could answer, the front door swung open, revealing a casually dashing man with a duffle bag in one hand, a video camera in the other, a guitar case slung across his back.

“And here we are!” The man said enthusiastically to his camera, shouldering his way into the apartment with all of his luggage.

He swung the camera around to see the inside of the apartment before turning it back on his own face. “Home sweet home! Thanks so much for the great tour, amigos, it really was a blast to get to play for you all. As always, be sure to like and subscribe, and hit that little bell in the corner to get a heads up whenever I upload a new video. Alright Cruzcitos, until next time, never forget to seize your moment!”

Miguel stared open-mouthed. His forgotten guitar tipped forward off his lap, hitting the floor with a hollow bang.

Ernesto looked around at the noise, eyebrows furrowed and bright smile gone as he snapped the side screen of his video camera closed against his leg. “What was that?”

“Welcome back!” Hector called from the kitchen, leaning across the bar counter to see Ernesto. “Good tour?”

“So good.” Ernesto said, his smile back, but far more relaxed than the one he’d used for the camera. “Would have been even better if you’d come, amigo.”

Ernesto stepped forward to the bar and did a double-take when he spotted Imelda, who kind of grimaced as she acknowledged him with a lackluster wave.

“Whoa,” Ernesto said, taking a step back in shock, “Imelda, long time no see! I really should have guessed you two were back together when I walked in to such a clean apartment.”

“I’m just visiting, Hector and I are not back together.” Imelda said firmly, turning back to the stove.

Behind her back Hector silently shrugged his shoulders at Ernesto, tipping his hand back and forth as if saying we’re kinda back together?

Ernesto nodded, a knowing smile on his face. “Aha.” He turned to look at Miguel, whose brain was still reeling in shock. “And hey, you must be Miguel.”

“You, you know about me?” Miguel managed to stutter, getting to his feet.

“Well sure, you’re all Hector’s been talking about.” Ernesto said, looking away as he set his duffle bag on the floor.

“You’re Cruz!” Miguel burst out, his excitement finally breaking through his shock, “You’re actually him! I’ve watched all you guitar videos a million times! Are you really Tio Hector’s roommate?”

Ernesto raised an eyebrow, some of the energy of his camera smile coming back. “Hector, you didn’t tell me your kid was a fan.”

“What? Miguel, I thought you knew.” Hector said, looking surprised, “I mean you’ve been practicing Duet Through Time all afternoon, I swear I’ve mentioned it before.” 

“I can’t believe it!” Miguel felt like he was going to burst with excitement, starting to bounce up and down. He was going to live in the same apartment as Cruz, his music hero and the best guitar player on the whole internet, maybe even the whole world! “Can I watch you play guitar? Hector’s been teaching me, but I always try to play like you do!” 

“Ha, and here I thought I could relax.” Ernesto joked, shooting Hector a look before smiling at Miguel and pulling a white bedazzled iphone from his pocket. “Sure kid, I can’t say no to a fan. In fact, come over here so I can get a picture of you.”

Miguel practically flew to Cruz’s side and smiled widely as Ernesto took a selfie of them both.

“We’ll see what Instagram thinks of my new roommate.” Cruz said, typing something on the phone and winking down at Miguel.

“Just make sure that-” Hector started to say, but the buzzing of his own phone cut him off. He pulled it out and answered it. “Ayyyyy, Chich!”

Hector’s voice was overly bright as he turned away from the others, “How are you- no, yeah…No, it’s fine, it’s fine, just the- no, yeah I get it… Haha, you’re such a kidder Chich. No, I just need the van for next weekend, but it needs the back left tire replaced… Well I would, but I’m taking my godson to Santa Cecila for the holiday… Well I could could probably pay you back next week…”

“Hold on,” Ernesto said, looking up from typing on his iphone, “Hector, next weekend is Dia de los Muertos.”

“I know,” Hector said, putting his phone to his chest as he looked over, “that’s why we’re visiting Miguel’s family, for the holiday, he hasn’t seen them for a couple months.”

“But we have a performance that Saturday night,” Ernesto said, frowning and stuffing his phone back in his pocket. “you promised you would come. We booked it six months ago.”

Miguel looked at Hector, an uncomfortable panic in his stomach. He’d really, really been looking forward to seeing his familia again for the holiday.

“Aye, no, I forgot!” Hector said, grimacing, “I’m really sorry Ernesto, I apologize for that, I completely forgot with everything that’s been going on. Sorry, Chich, just one second.” He said, turning back to the phone briefly before looking back up, “Ernesto, I can’t make it, I already promised his abuelita we’d come.”

“Well then you go and tell his abuelita that you double-booked yourself,” Ernesto insisted, putting his hands on the counter, “they can come pick up the kid if it’s that important to them. We had this booked way in advance Hector, we’re going to lose ticket sales if you back out. Besides, it sounds like you don’t even have a working car anyway.”

“I’ll drive them.” Imelda said from the stove.

All eyes turned to look at Imelda, who casually flipped a quesadilla, then looked up at Ernesto, a clear challenge in her expression.

“Imelda, that’s a three hour drive.” Hector said, eyes wide, “I can’t ask you to do that for us.”

“I know, which is why I’m offering.” Imelda said, pulling a plate out a cupboard.“Miguel needs to see his family, your car situation is obviously a mess, and I can visit my friend Ceci while we’re in town. It’s a win-win situation.”

“Imelda…” Ernesto groaned, leaning on the counter, “Please don’t do this, this has nothing to do with you, you’re just enabling his bad planning.”

“No, I’m making sure that my student’s emotional needs are taken care of.” Imelda had the same voice Miguel had heard her use on kids who were running in the halls at school. “I’m not going to let you keep a little boy away from visiting the graves of his recently deceased parents because you want good ticket sales.”

“You know that’s not what I was saying.” Ernesto said sourly, but he looked away from her and picked up his duffle bag instead. “Fine, whatever, skip town together. I’m going to go unpack, I have video editing to do.”

Miguel shifted uncomfortably as Ernesto walked to the back room, closing the door behind him a little more loudly than was needed.

“You didn’t tell me you were a performer too,” Miguel said hesitantly to Hector. “you can go to your concert if you want.”

“What? No way, I’d take you over a crowded performance any day, chamaco.” Hector smiled, coming around the bar counter to ruffle Miguel’s hair. “Ernesto thinks I’m more important to his audience than I really am. I just write the songs, he’s the face they see on their screens. Don’t let him get to you, he just gets a little worked up sometimes.”

“You really shouldn’t let him push you around like that.” Imelda said, her voice stern but no longer cutting as she flipped the finished quesadilla onto a plate, sliced it, then slid it across the counter to Miguel.

“Will he still let me watch him play guitar?” Miguel asked, climbing up onto the bar stool to pick at a slice of his quesadilla.

“Of course he will,” Hector smiled, taking a slice for himself. “just give him time to cool off, he can never resist an audience. And really, Imelda, thank you so much for the ride, you’re a real joya.”

“It’ll be good to visit Santa Cecilia, I haven’t been in so long.” Imelda said, smiling as she turned back to the stove to make another quesadilla. “And you’ve still got Chich on the phone.”

Hector yelped, grabbing his phone off the counter. “Chich? Hey! I’m so sorry, so about the van, it looks like I won’t be needing it after all…”

Miguel looked back over his shoulder towards Cruz’s room. Hopefully Tio Hector was right and Miguel hadn’t messed up things too badly. Maybe if he was careful to be really nice, he and Cruz could still be friends after all.

[Part 6: Dia de los Muertos]

——-

So part 6: “Di de los Muertos” will be coming out in a week or so after @slusheeduck gets back from DISNEY WORLD (which I’m totally not low-key jealous about) but I promise it’ll definitely be worth the wait. :)

Thank you to all you lovely people for your reblogs and comments, we love reading them!

- Wit

[chendersonfic]

Inhospitable Place, Chapter 1

“I’m looking at you. But you don’t see me. That’s okay.

By the time you notice me watching you, it will be too late.”

The October rain gently tapping on the window and the roof was finally slowing to a drizzle. The rain in Connecticut was different than Pennsylvania rain—it was colder…harsher somehow. That was one of many things on my list of grievances against Hartford, and by default against Hunter, who came up with the idea to move here. It’s not that it was his fault. He thought he was doing the right thing by getting me away from everything that was familiar. He probably imagined he was giving me—us—a brand new start. But no matter how hard I tried, the bile of resentment would creep up my throat, willing me to remind him every now and then that the road to hell was paved with good intentions.  

I didn’t have a personal vendetta against the city. Had I come here under different circumstances, I probably would have appreciated the historic buildings, and bored my family and friends to death with anecdotes about Bushnell park being the oldest park in the country, and how I visited Mark Twain’s House. Instead, I came to Hartford numbed by Xanax, Prozac, and a bottle of wine. Nothing could have impressed me. Everything was a cruel reminder that the world didn’t come to a grinding halt when my mother died. It just kept going. And now I was supposed to keep going with it. 

A part of me felt sorry for Hunter. He met me two months before my mother suddenly passed away from a massive brain aneurysm. The person he met, the person he fell in love with, that person no longer existed. I was a professional ballroom dancer and a choreographer for a popular TV show. I had a life, I had friends, and a bustling career. I had a body that was sculpted by long hours of dancing and a fridge that contained celery juice and oat milk. I was full of energy and couldn't wait to see what every day had to bring. That all changed overnight. A career doesn't wait for you; there's an appropriate grieving window and then it's back to business as usual. But I couldn't bear it. As hard as I would try, I just couldn't find my footing without her. 

After a while I had no job, and my friends had given up on me. All I had left was my sister, Francesca, my dad, Randy, and my boyfriend, Hunter, who somehow stuck around through it all. When he first suggested the move to Hartford, I was opposed to it. After all, why would I move away from the only close family I had left? But everything at home was a constant reminder of what I no longer had. Her books, her comforter, her perfume—it was unbearable. So after a week of debating, I said yes and—despite the protests from my sister and father—we packed up our stuff and left for Connecticut.

The drive to our new home took 7 1/2 hours from Pittsburgh. Since I no longer had a job it was down to Hunter to find us a place to live on his loan officer salary. We moved into a 2-bedroom loft—exposed brick industrial design. One bedroom was ours, the other was my designated new studio where I was supposed to recapture my love for dancing. I told Hunter I was practicing daily. That was a lie. Nothing changed for me; nothing except my surroundings. 

I stood in the empty studio looking out of the window and watching the rain. I turned my head back when I heard Bruno waddling over. My only source of joy these days. He was a fluffy overweight Corgi whose owners had given him up to the local high kill animal shelter when they moved. One day, while I was struggling to stay sober and fighting dark thoughts of ending it once and for all, I decided to go on a walk. It was another rainy day, just like today. I almost passed by the shelter, but the howling from the inside made me suddenly stop. Something had beckoned me to go inside that day. A gut feeling. I walked from cage to cage, shivering under my wet jacket. The sad looking furry faces staring back at me shivered as well. The place was freezing, and the smell of ammonia and fear wafted through the air.

“Can I help you?” a middle age curly haired woman asked, popping her head out from behind an office door. Her name tag read Tatiana. 

“I’m just looking around,” I replied. She sighed, obviously displeased at my window-shopping approach to animals in need. I felt embarrassed. 

“I’m not supposed to tell you, but the three at the end are getting euthanized this Friday. In case you feel like saving a life,” she said in a harsh, condescending tone, then disappeared behind the door once again.

“Well no wonder you have to euthanize dogs, who’d want to get one from you,” I muttered to myself. I thought about leaving, but it felt disrespectful to not even take a look at the three death row mutts. They deserved my attention, at least. I walked down the dim lit hallway to the end of the chain link fence enclosures. The first one was a Pitbull that launched at the fence with the speed of light, making me stagger back. “I’m DANGEROUS, do not put hands near the fence!” the description tag on his door read. 

“Sorry buddy,” I said in the midst of his barking, “Hope it's better in the next life for you.” I moved to the next cage, where a big Husky mix snarled upon seeing me. His name was “Diamond”. 

“Don't worry, you'll be someone's gem in dog heaven,” I told him, then slowly moved onto the last cage. “Bruno,” the name tag read, along with, “I’m feisty, don’t put hands near the fence!” 

Bruno was the fattest Corgi I've ever seen. He laid there on the concrete slab, behind the chain link fence, looking completely devoid of life. He didn't even bother to bark at me. 

“Bruno,” I said, trying to find the right last words. His eyes slowly moved to meet mine, then he looked back down and gently put his head on his paws. He had given up. Like he knew what was coming next. For a brief moment I wondered if that's what I looked like to people as well. A man who had given up on life. 

After I left the shelter, I cried all the way home. Life seemed so cruel and unfair. A healthy woman with two children drops dead in the middle of the day, out of nowhere and without any warning. A dog who loves snacks gets left at a strange place and locked in a small wet cage where he now awaits his death.  

Hunter was waiting for me at home.

“Where have you been?” he asked. It must have been curious to him, since I almost never left our place anymore. 

“I went on a walk,” I replied, grabbing a towel from the bathroom. I was soaked. 

“Do we not have an umbrella?” he asked, turning the heater on. 

“We do, I just wasn’t thinking,” I replied. Poor Hunter, he had to constantly worry about me.

“Did you see anything good on your walk?” I sighed, then told him my shelter story. 

“Do you think they give them like…a last meal? Like maybe his favorite snack?” I asked concerned, and he raised his eyebrow.

“Uhh, they’re dogs, not death row inmates. I doubt they get a steak for their last meal,” he replied truthfully. “But I’m sure it’s quick and painless. Better than spending the rest of their lives in a small cage. Imagine the horror of that,” he added, his face suddenly stone serious. 

“What day is it today?” I asked.

“Wednesday,” he replied, shaking himself out of his dark thoughts. “Don’t even think about it. Our building has a no-pet policy,” he said, then added, “I’ll probably be home late tomorrow, just so you know. I’m behind on a few things.”

“No worries. And I wasn’t thinking about it,” I lied, thinking of the big Corgi and how he only had one more day to live. I wondered how he’d spend it. Probably cooped up in that cold, wet cage. The thought made me sick to my stomach. 

The next morning I woke up with the sun, which was rare for me. Sleeping until the afternoon was more the norm nowadays. Hunter had already left, and I was feeling restless. I cleaned the kitchen, scrubbed the bathroom, washed the dishes. Finally, I grabbed a load of dirty clothes and went downstairs to the building’s laundry room. 

“Hello,” the warm voice from behind me said as I was pouring my detergent into the washer. I looked back and recognized my next-door neighbor. “I’m Derek,” he said, as if we never met. I suppose he had forgotten me, I rarely ever went out. 

“I know, I remember you. I’m Louis,” I replied. He was wearing grey sweatpants and a fitting blue tee. If I wasn’t in a relationship, and on the brink of suicide, I probably would have felt quite giddy to be speaking to him. 

“That’s right,” he said, putting his laundry basket down. “You guys are from out of state, right?”

“Right, Pennsylvania.”

“How are you liking Hartford?” he asked, taking over the other machine. 

“Well, it’s nice. Lots of rain,” I replied, not knowing what to say. I haven’t really stepped foot out of the apartment since we moved. I didn't have much to say about Hartford. 

“Right, right. I don't mean to sound strange, but your face is so familiar…” he trailed off.

“I was a choreographer for a TV show,” I explained, and everything clicked into place for him.

“Yes, that’s it!” he said snapping his fingers excitedly. And I laughed for the first time in months. “What happened man? You were so great at that.”

“My mother passed away,” I replied bluntly. His brown eyes looked at me with sad warmth. 

“That is tough. How are you doing?” he asked.

“Doing alright,” I lied. “Or I was. But then I saw these dogs at the shelter yesterday, and now I’m all messed up about it. It’s dumb but, there was a Corgi and they’re putting him down tomorrow. And it’s just sad,” I rambled on, then stopped, embarrassed. He raised an eyebrow. 

“The local shelter?” I nodded my head. “What's preventing you from getting him?” he asked, starting his load while I was still putting my clothes in.

“Well for one, this place doesn't allow pets,” I said.

“You know what my mother always says?” he asked.

“What’s that?”

“Rules are meant to be broken,” he replied. He grabbed his bin and gave me a smile, then disappeared just as fast as he came.

Strange. I thought about our encounter for the rest of the day. But how could I take care of a dog, when I couldn’t even look after myself anymore. It was months since I ate a vegetable. I went for days without showering. Dogs needed consistency, routine, rules. Plus, Hunter wouldn’t be happy, even if we could somehow convince the landlord to let us have a dog in the first place.

At 10:00 o'clock I popped a Xanax, followed it up with some wine, and went to sleep. I dreamt of Bruno, alone in his kennel. Cold and hungry. 

When I woke up, Hunter was already gone. I looked at the clock. 11:45. Today was his last day. What would they feed him? Would he be scared? Would he yelp in pain when the needle pierced his skin? I felt anger rise up in me. He was a perfectly healthy dog, why should he have to die in that place? Just because someone deemed him “feisty”. Why should he be nice to people when this is what they’ve done to him? The expectation was ridiculous. He had every right to be angry. Disenchanted. “Feisty”. I put on a hoodie, grabbed a bag of leftover rotisserie chicken and ran out the door. Maybe I could at least be there for him. Maybe he liked rotisserie chicken. 

I finally made it to the shelter and almost ran Tatiana into the ground.

“What in the hell!” she grimaced, pushing me back with her bony hands. I tried to catch my breath and realized I was completely out of shape.

“Have the…have the dogs been… been euthanized yet?” I asked. She stared at me in confusion. “The three dogs,” I tried to make her understand.

“Oh, yes, at 11:00 this morning,” she replied, raising an eyebrow at the bag of chicken in my hand.

“How…how did it happen?” I asked. She sighed.

“Well, first we took them out of the kennel on a leash. They thought they were going for a walk. They started wagging their tails. But as soon as we got close to the euthanasia room, they knew something was up. They must have sensed the smell of death in the air. So, they put up a fight,” she said, matter-of-factly, then continued. “They had to be restrained until the vet injected a lethal dose that put them out. Then, they were put into black plastic bags, and placed in the freezer, where they now wait to be picked up, like trash.” I imagined Bruno through every step of that journey, and the tears started involuntarily pouring down.

“Can I…can I maybe take him with me and bury him?” I asked. It’s not like I even had a yard to bury him in, but the thought of leaving him behind destroyed me. She sighed again. 

“You’re talking about Bruno, right, the chunky Corgi?” she asked. I nodded my head and wiped my tears. She pointed to the office door. “He said you’d come, but I didn’t believe it,” she said more to herself than to me. “Guess I owe him that $50.”

“What?” I asked, confused. She pointed to the door again, more impatiently this time. As if I was supposed to understand what she was talking about. 

         “Go, he wants to talk to you,” she said, then walked off towards the kennels, leaving me behind. I approached the door with the name plate that read, “Dr. Derek Robinson, Veterinarian.” I knocked, then opened it before getting a reply. I needed to find out what was going on.

         He was on the phone, but flashed me a bright smile upon seeing me, then raised a finger to indicate he’d be with me in a minute. I waited by the door, confused by whatever was going on. 

         “Hello neighbor,” he said, finally getting off the phone. He looked different in his work clothes, and I was pretty speechless. He checked out the bag of chicken I was holding with a confused face.

         “Lunch?”

          “I uhh, I thought I could give it to Bruno before…you know, but I’m too late. Wait, you work here?” I asked, trying to make sense of it all. He laughed from behind his desk. 

“Yes. And that’s sweet, but dogs don’t eat before euthanasia. Makes them nauseous,” he explained.

“Oh,” I said, feeling stupid. “So, did you have to do it?” I asked.

“Yes, an unfortunate part of my job,” he stated, and got up. He walked past me and opened the door. “Thankfully, only two dogs had to be put down today.” He started walking towards the kennels, and I followed him.

“Really? That’s…that’s great! How did that happen?” I tried to keep up with his long and quick strides.

“Well, I can’t in good conscience put down a dog that has a home waiting for him,” he replied as we got to the end of the kennels. He smiled at me. I looked at him, then at the chain-link fence, and realized we were standing in front of Bruno’s kennel. My heartbeat picked up and I quickly looked inside. He was laying on the concrete slab, miserable as ever, but still very much alive. I felt relief spread through me as I looked back at Derek.

“But…me?” I asked.

“Who else came in here to give an overweight death row Corgi a bag of chicken?” he asked, and I could sense a note of amusement in his tone.

“But I can’t, you know our building has a no-pet policy,” I replied.

“Good thing my brother is the owner. I already spoke to him. I’m paying a monthly pet fee on your behalf. Now say hi to your new friend,” he said. “Give him some of that through the fence first,” he pointed to my chicken bag, “he’s less snappy when he isn’t hungry.” 

         An hour later, I was frantically searching for a pet store to get Bruno a bed, food dishes, and snacks. Back home, he was wary of me at first. Only coming by when he wanted to eat. But over three months he acclimated. And with Derek’s help and guidance, we got him on a healthier diet and he was starting to look trimmer already. And while he still wasn’t a lap dog, and wanted absolutely nothing to do with Hunter, he now slept in his dog bed next to my side of the bed and woke me up by bumping his wet nose into my hand to take him on a morning walk. Bruno had become the biggest reason for my continued existence. 

         I looked at him now, as his eyes impatiently darted from my face to the door and back—a signal that it was time for an evening treat.

“We can’t keep eating like this,” I said, smacking my ever-growing belly. I walked over to the kitchen and he followed me. I reached for the dog treats, and he perked up. I slowly handed over the fragrant pepperoni stick. “Don’t tell Derek,” I said, and he grabbed it with precision, then made his way to the bedroom to enjoy it. I didn’t blame him, it’s not like I wanted to be in my own company either. 

         I poured myself a disproportionately large glass of wine and checked my phone. Three missed voicemails from my sister, Francesca. I'd have to get back to her eventually. She was the persistent type. 

         I made my way to the living room and turned on the TV. I glanced at the morning’s copy of the Hartford Times, splayed open on our living room table. It announced that the body of yet another young man had been found. That would make it 6 in total. One for every two months that we've lived here. It was now very clear: there was a serial killer on the loose.

[cheemers-writing-archive]

Crusader of Life 2: Chapter 14

“Are you sure your neck is alright?” Kakyoin asked. The whole trip, Lily was rubbing it, as if something was there.

“I told you, I’m fine,” Lily answered. Right, if she was going to stay alive, she had to act inconspicuous. That meant no rubbing her neck. Because if she gave away the fact that she met him, then she would have no neck. Or any other body part. She’d be dead.

“If you say so,” Kakyoin sighed. Something had been off about Lily ever since she came back from her walk. He could tell that her saying the torn clothing was from falling into a bush was a lie, considering they were completely destroyed in some places and had been soaked in blood. Surely she would tell him after they got done with Rohan, though.

“Alright, here’s your stop,” the taxi man told them. “The Kishibe residence.”

“Thank you very much,” Lily said.

“My pleasure,” the taxi man smiled. “Oh, and if your neck is stiff, I find that massages always help loosen it up.”

How noticeable was she being? Even the man who kept his eyes on the road noticed her rubbing. “I’m sure that’ll help me, thank you again.”

“Of course,” he nodded, rolling up the window and driving off.

“Alright, let’s do this,” Lily said. If there was anything she could do to get her mind off of her encounter, it was the task she needed to do right now. As she and Kakyoin walked up to the doorbell, she noticed somebody walking out of the corner of her eye. Kira! Her entire body stiffened a little bit as they locked eyes, but nothing else happened, thankfully.

“Are you okay?” Kakyoin asked. “You suddenly got really tense.”

“I’m fine,” Lily lied. “Just a bit nervous about this guy.”

Kakyoin hummed in response. “Don’t be. If he tries to harm you, I’ll make him regret it.”

Lily smiled at Kakyoin’s words, almost blushing a little. There is one thing she was sure of: if she were to die, her death would certainly be avenged. She reached out to ring the doorbell, but just as she did, a hand came from the other side and grabbed her arm.

“Hey! Let go of her!” Kakyoin exclaimed.

“Who are you? What do you want?” the man behind the door, supposedly Rohan, asked. He let go of Lily and opened the door slightly more.

“We’re members of the Speedwagon Foundation!” Lily answered frantically. “We’ve come to your house because of something to do with an arrow!”

“An arrow?” Rohan questioned.

“Yes,” Kakyoin answered. It was amazing to Lily how he could keep his composure near a man like this. “We’ve received reports that you have been stabbed with a special arrow, and survived the attack. Have you been noticing a weird, ghost-like creature following you?”

Rohan tilted his head and furrowed his eyebrows. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I was never stabbed with an arrow, nor do I have any weird creatures following me. Perhaps you have the wrong guy.”

The two looked at each other, then back at Rohan.

“Of course,” Lily bowed. “We’re sorry for taking your time.”

“Wait, you’ve come all this way,” Rohan said. “Why not rest a bit at my house? I could show you a tour of my studio. Even if you don’t know who I am, wouldn’t it be nice to brag to others that you saw a famous person’s house?”

Lily looked over at Kakyoin. They weren’t exactly booked for the rest of the day, but she could tell Kakyoin wanted to talk to her in private. Probably about the neck thing.

“We’d love to!” Lily exclaimed. Anything to avoid accidentally spilling her secret. “Come on, Noriaki, won’t it be nice?”

Oh, something was DEFINITELY up with Lily. Kakyoin hadn’t seen her so excited about something she really didn’t care about up until then. It seemed like she was avoiding his conversation.

As Rohan led the two of them into his house, Kakyoin gave Lily’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

“I’ll go get some refreshments really quick,” Rohan told them. “You two stay here.”

As soon as Rohan left, Kakyoin spoke. “I know you’re hiding something from me.”

“Huh?” Lily asked. “Me?”

“Don’t play dumb,” Kakyoin said. “What happened when you were on your walk?”

“Now’s not the time to talk about that,” Lily whispered. “We’re at someone’s house, and I don’t want to ruin the mood.” Hopefully, if she acted normal the whole time while they were here, Noriaki will have forgotten that he even needed to talk. Luckily for her, Kakyoin took the bait, and they stayed quiet until Rohan came back with some food.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” he said. “I hope you like cookies, I didn’t have much time to prepare.”

“That’s more than alright,” Lily reassured him. “They look delicious!”

“So,” Rohan began, “Speedwagon Foundation, huh? Must be exciting dealing with the supernatural every day.”

“You would think,” Kakyoin chuckled, “but after a couple of years it just becomes clockwork.”

“I’m sure any normal job would bore you to death, then!” Rohan laughed. “What sort of things have you dealt with before?”

“That’s a secret we can’t tell,” Lily smiled.

After the three of them had conversed for a couple of minutes, Kakyoin looked down at his watch. “Oh, would you look at the time,” he said. “We should probably be going soon. It was nice to meet you, Mr. Kishibe.”

“Ah, wait! Before you go,” Rohan ran to his studio and grabbed a closed envelope before running back to Lily and Kakyoin, “I want you to have the honors of looking through my transcript. Not many people get to see this, you know.”

Lily looked at Kakyoin, and Kakyoin Lily, and they both shrugged.

“No harm in it, right?” Lily replied.

Rohan opened up the envelope, and a strange energy emerged from the pages, blinding the two for a short moment with a bright light. When the light went away, however, something felt different, like their skin had pulled away, but instead of revealing their muscles underneath, it was a second layer of skin. Looking down at her hand, Lily saw that her hand was peeled back, revealing words underneath, similar to a book. Reading some of the words, she realized these were things she’s experienced.

Her first thoughts when she figured out her life was now open like a book was not worried about her privacy, but rather, if he would figure out about Kira. After all, if he was found out, her life was as good as gone.

“You…” Kakyoin growled. “What did you do to us?!”

“I made your life into a book, of course,” Rohan smirked. “As a mangaka, I’m constantly looking for inspiration, and this new ability of mine has let me look into people’s lives, and find the perfect characteristics for my characters.”

“You were struck by the arrow, you liar!” Lily yelled.

“I was, I’ll admit,” Rohan sneered. “But I couldn’t let you know that. You probably have abilities of your own. Now then, whose life should I read through first? How about yours, Kakyoin?”

Although Kakyoin was being approached by Rohan, he didn’t lose his scowl. “You’ll regret this, you know,” he said.

“Oh, I will?” Rohan taunted. “Just try to attack me. Either one of you.”

“Hierophant Green!” Kakyoin cried. His Stand appeared right beside him. “I’ll make sure you know the true power of my Emerald Splash!”

As a hundred green gems shot towards Rohan, he just stood there, standing confidently. When the emeralds had all hit something and disappeared, not a scratch was on him.

“But that’s impossible!” Kakyoin exclaimed. “I understand a few missing you, but not a single one hitting?”

“I already wrote on both of you that you can’t hurt me,” Rohan chuckled. “Whatever I write in there will become true, but I don’t want to write too much or your lives will be fake. Now then, if you don’t mind… actually, even if you do mind, I’ll be looking into your life now.”

Lily was relieved she wasn’t the first target for Rohan. That meant she had time to make an escape, and hopefully alert Jotaro. For some reason, walking while she was a book was practically impossible, so she had to crawl her way out.

“Hm, yes, I see,” Rohan nodded as he looked at Kakyoin’s book. “So, even as a child, you had this ability. Although, not much really happens, in fact, you’re pretty distant from everyone, so nothing happens at all. That is, until this trip to Egypt you took with your family. That’s when you met a… man? A vampire? A vampire named… Dio. That’s when you were forced by a flesh bud, whatever that is, to swear loyalty to him. Oh, and the next fifty days after this Jotaro man saved you are filled to the brim with excitement! Enemies left and right, bonding with friends, oh, and a love story. This is very exciting! You were almost to the brink of death, but your girlfriend, Lily, oh, I guess future wife, then, saved you. Oh, and now we get more to the present day! You marry, of course, then there’s a child, Emily, who later gains a Stand ability, right before a… a trip to Morioh! Well, isn’t this something. You discover that a Stand arrow can give people abilities like your own, and that someone has been using it to… hold on, what’s this? ‘Lily Kakyoin has been acting very weird ever since she went on a walk today, and I can’t seem to find out why. I think she’s avoiding talking about it.’”

Lily stopped dead in her tracks. That comment confirmed everything.

“Now, then, why don’t we take a look at your life and uncover your little secret? Also, don’t bother running and calling for help, you’ll forget this even happened as soon as you leave this house.”

“Y-y-you st-stay away from me!” Lily shouted. “That secret is a secret for a reason, you know! I can’t tell anyone, or I die!”

“Aw, what pitiful excuses to keep me from reading you,” Rohan chuckled.

“No, I’m serious!” Lily said as her breathing quickened. “If anyone finds out my secret, I’ll die! I’m telling the truth, I swear!”

“Lily Kakyoin,” Rohan began. “Original name was Lily Sullivan. Another born Stand user. Grew up in America, went to a less than ideal public school, where there were either fights or beatdowns, constantly. You always wanted to help stop the fights, but you could never do much, so you healed the wounds of the person most injured. That is, if they weren’t immediately sent to the principal. Blah, blah, blah, moved to Japan high school year, ooh, met Jotaro Kujo and got yourself tangled up in the fight with Dio entirely by fate, almost died, twice, three times, four, we’re not counting all of that. There’s a few years of boredom, then you also arrive in Morioh with your Stand user child. Oh, and here’s the secret!”

“I’m begging you, please,” Lily whimpered. “You can read whatever else you want, but please don’t read that part.”

“One day, while taking a fine walk in Morioh, you ran across a man by the name of-”

“And what do you think you’re doing?” Jotaro asked. He had suddenly appeared right behind Rohan, who jumped a little.

“I sure hope you weren’t going to expose Lily there after she specifically said that she would die if anyone figured out what she was hiding,” Jotaro said. He grabbed Rohan’s shirt collar and lifted him up, summoning Star Platinum. “She’s terrible at lying, even with exaggerations, so saying that she’ll die is probably true. And I don’t want her to die.”

“You must be Jotaro Kujo,” Rohan said, trying to maintain the smug grin on his face despite Jotaro’s threats. “I’ve heard a lot about you in their stories. I also know that you can stop time, and Star Platinum can punch stronger and faster than any human ever could.”

Lily was suspicious of Rohan. Surely he had to be stalling for something.

“I’ll tell you what,” Jotaro scowled. “You erase the memories of Lily having a secret from us and let her and Kakyoin go, and I’ll only beat you senseless.”

Then, when looking in Rohan’s hands, Lily saw it. His transcript!

Jotaro, don’t look at the transcript! she tried to shout, but her mouth wouldn’t even move. Of course, not hurting Rohan also includes giving his enemy an advantage.

“I have a different proposition,” Rohan smirked. “How about you take a look at this!”

Then, in, quite literally, the blink of an eye, Rohan flew back into his desk, injured in several places. His transcript had been tossed aside, and Jotaro was in a slightly different position.

“Now, then, I’ll ask again.” Before Rohan could get up again, Jotaro placed a foot on his chest. “Since you’ve already been hurt pretty bad, I suggest you erase Kakyoin and I’s memory of Lily having a secret, and let them go, or you just might need urgent care, and I won’t be calling the ambulance.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll write it in!” Rohan held his hands up in defense. “But I need to open up your memories in order to do it for you!”

“Then get done with everything else first, and let me write it on myself,” Jotaro ordered. “I don’t trust you in the slightest.”

Rohan cursed under his breath, then went over to Kakyoin to write in “Lily Kakyoin’s actions are completely normal, and I see nothing wrong with them. She is not keeping a secret from me.”

“Now, let them go,” Jotaro told Rohan. “Break them free from your Stand’s spell, and don’t do anything to me until they’re gone.”

“Y-yes, sir.”

Lily could feel her skin slowly close back from its opened form, and before she knew it, she was completely back to normal. One look at Kakyoin, and she could tell that he was back to normal, too.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay by yourself, Jotaro?” Kakyoin asked. “I mean, who knows what he’ll do to you once we leave?”

“I’ll be fine,” Jotaro reassured his friend. “Plus, even if you were to stay, what would you do? Attack him?”

Kakyoin laughed. “Good point. Well, I’ll see you later!”

As Lily and Kakyoin slowly walked out of the house, Kakyoin said, “Hey, I’m sorry about accusing you of hiding something from me. I should have known that you wouldn’t keep any secrets between us, even if it was life threatening.”

“It’s okay,” Lily replied. “It happens sometimes. I’m just glad you didn’t keep bickering me about it while Rohan was going to ‘get refreshments’” Or I would have spilled it all out.

“ORA! ORA!”

“Get back here you manga artist!”

The two looked over at Rohan’s house, then at each other. They couldn’t help but burst out into laughter.

“Looks like he got what was coming to him,” Kakyoin chuckled. “Hey, what time is it?”

“About 12:30,” Lily answered. “Looks like we still have some time to kill.”

“Then let’s kill that time together, shall we?” Kakyoin asked.

[gregoryjdillerblr]

Ranking all 9 Led Zeppelin albums, from worst to best

Led Zeppelin is without a doubt my second favorite band, following Pink Floyd. There is no doubt that these two bands really defined the 70s, with Pink Floyd pushing progressive rock into mainstream, influencing bands like Rush, Yes, Genesis, while Led Zeppelin was pushing harder rock, influencing bands like AC/DC, Rush (whose first album was pretty much a Zeppelin ripoff until they began exploring their more creative, progressive rock side), Van Halen, and even Black Sabbath. Led Zeppelin helped pioneered the 70s. They are one of the very few popular bands that didn’t won a single Grammy award. 

Led Zeppelin is also one of the very few rock bands that not only helped push rock and roll as it is today, but they are one of the very few bands that explored all subgenres of rock: from blues to folk, to metal to progressive rock, Led Zeppelin became one of the most popular artists of all time, often competing in the third spot with Michael Jackson and The Beatles. 

The Who’s original drummer, Keith Moon, heard the band (at the time was the New Yardbirds and with different band members) and jokingly said, “you guys are going to fall like a lead balloon.” Jimmy Page changed the name from The New Yardbirds to Led Zeppelin, dropping the A out to of lead to make it cooler. Pete Townshend, however, would quickly grow hatred for Led Zeppelin, while mocking his own band just the same. Black Sabbath often went to their gigs, and two members of Zeppelin, Bonham and Plant, often visited Black Sabbath, with Bonham asking Bill Ward to play his drum set, of which Ward would decline, fearing Bonham would damage his set. 

Many would argue who started the metal movement: Led Zeppelin or Black Sabbath. While Led did come out a year before Sabbath, there’s no question that Sabbath’s descent into more darker, harder rock in their later years really defined the metal movement, while Zeppelin moved from blues to folk and progressive rock in their later albums. Nevertheless, Led Zeppelin helped shape hard rock and rock and roll in general, and their influence can be heard decades to come. With just only 8 studio albums and a rarities album, Led Zeppelin is still a popular, influential band. Here’s my list of their albums, ranked from what I think is their worst to best albums. This my personal ranking, and I know I may piss a few people off, but this is a matter of my taste. 

9. Coda, 1982. With the shocking death of John Bonham, Page, Plant, and Jones quickly departed, ending Led Zeppelin. The band was on the edge of splitting up, with their previous and last studio album was recorded on separate occasions because two members couldn’t deal seeing each other, but more on that within a couple of minutes. Coda was released as a tribute to the late Bonham, with the band releasing tracks from their previous albums. What we get with Coda is a forgotten mess of songs that were clearly cut for obvious reasons. Not to say Coda is a bad album, it’s just mediocre at its best. “Wearing and Tearing,” the album’s closer, is the one that often stands out for me, while I feel that the other tracks really don’t highlight Zeppelin’s greater works. 

8. Presence, 1976. The only Led Zeppelin album without a keyboard, Presence sees Led Zeppelin turning to their roots in favor of more blues driven rock of the first two albums. While I think Presence is a good album, I find that without the lack of keyboards from Jones really drags this album down. While many think the ten minute opener “Achilles Last Stand” is an epic, underrated Zeppelin track, I do find the song drags by the midway point as the band doesn’t offer much interchangeability in the track, often repeating itself for ten long minutes. “Tea For One” is the album’s nine minute closer, which is a boring mock off to the great track from Led Zeppelin III, “Since I’ve Been Loving You,” without Jones’ great keyboard works. However, I do enjoy “For Your Life,” “Nobody’s Fault but Mine” and “Candy Store Rock”  the most off this album. 

7. In Through the Out Door, 1979. Their last studio album, and perhaps their most controversial, In Through the Out Door sees the band bringing back the keyboards that were lacking from Presence, but more in the forefront than their previous albums combined. On the verge of breaking up, Plant and Jones went into the studio together and began recording, leaving Page and Bonham to come in much later when the other two weren’t present, and began working on what Plant and Jones recorded. Though this album may be a tad messier than Presence, the band nevertheless took a much great risk, one I think is a better result. I do like the ten minute track “Carouselambra.” It show cases Jones’ keyboards while Page does a beautifully haunting guitar riffs in the middle of the song, before ending the song on a much funky tune. “In the Evening” is a great opener, one of the very few Zeppelin tracks that was played with a Stratocaster, a guitar Page was rare to see playing with. While “Fool in the Rain” and “All My Love” receive more radio play, my favorite track on the album, the closer “I’m Gonna Crawl.” Plant pays tribute to his dead son with “All My Love,” which is an okay song but one I find often overplayed in Zeppelin’s catalogue. At this time, Page and Bonham were struggling addicts, with alcohol eventually leading to Bonham’s death the following year, ending the classic rock band’s incredible career. 

6. Led Zeppelin II, 1969. Zeppelin’s sophomore effort, coming out just months after their first album, Led Zeppelin II further explores their blues driven rock. The most well known song on the album, which the album opens with, “Whole Lotta Love” showcases that Page was began to explore a bit further, providing some soundscapes in the song’s middle, with scraping guitar techniques and even a Theremin. “What Is and What Should Never Be,” “Thank You,” “Ramble On,” and “Bring It On Home” are the highlights for me. Led Zeppelin II is a good classic album on its own right, no doubt about it, but I do feel this album is a bit more jejune compared to what’s to come the following few years. 

5. Led Zeppelin, 1969. Their epic debut, Led Zeppelin quickly exploded. This debut album is surely one of the best debuts ever to put out in rock’s history, defining the band what they were and the sound they were after. Led Zeppelin push hard rock and blues rock into mainstream, while other bands around them were exploring progressive and psychedelic rock. What makes this album stand out for me compared to II is the underrated tracks that don’t often get much airplay. Most of these tracks seem to be forgotten about, ones that the radio don’t play compared to other more well known Zeppelin tracks. My favorite track is “How Many More Times,” an eight minute closer epic with a killer, catchy guitar riff that the song begins and ends with, while the middle is an exploration to different territories within the song. “Babe I’m Gonna Leave You” is another standout, with Page providing haunting acoustic before kicking it into high gear during the chorus. “You Shook Me” is another one that showcases Page’s talent with guitar shrieks and Plant delivering blues with a harmonica.  “Black Mountain Side” is another great track showcasing Page’s skills on an acoustic guitar. While some Zeppelin fans may find this album a bit dull compared to the their other classic albums, this album for me still stands out as among on of their best efforts, and an underrated one at that.

4. Led Zeppelin III, 1970. A bit more of an uneven album, Led Zeppelin III really showcases the greatness to come. It is here where the band began to explore other than blues driven rock. While the album does have the kickass opener” Immigrant Song,” the albums also provides some harder classics like “Celebration Day” and “Out on the Tiles.” “Since I’ve Been Loving You” is one of my personal favorite Zeppelin tracks, with Jones providing a haunting organ soundscape as Page plays the blues on his guitar, while Plant delivers emotion on vocals.  The second half of the album shows the band playing with more folk rock, with the song “Gallows Pole” showcasing the start of this trend (Jimmy even plays a banjo in this track). “Tangerine” and “That’s the Way” are slower songs with a beautiful and haunting lap steel guitar work by Page. 

3. Houses of the Holy, 1973. Houses of the Holy really shows the band to explore in much more progressive rock territory all the while without losing their sound. While “D’yer Mak’er” is the weakest track for me (I’m not really a reggae  kind of guy, sorry, though I think that genre is very good at live gigs and concerts), the other ones no doubt make up on this classic album. “The Song Remains the Same” is an underrated, kickass opener, with the combination of six and twelve string electric guitars. “The Rain Song” is another classic, a bit more Pink Floydish song with beautiful and haunting acoustic and electric guitar works by Page. If there is one song the band ever came close to sounding a little bit like Pink Floyd, “No Quarter” sees Jones playing a haunting keyboard while Page’s guitar is tuned half step, with piano overdubs playing in the middle when Page is delivering a solo.  While I do think “The Ocean” is a bit overplayed, it’s nevertheless a classic closer to an amazing and still somehow underrated album.

2. Physical Graffiti, 1975. Their double album and one that provided their second biggest track, “Kashmir,” Physical Graffiti is the Zeppelin album that really covers their catalogue, from folk to blues to progressive rock, it no doubt this album is simply a classic, and one that perhaps made them bigger than they already were. The album started five years before, with Jimmy Page producing songs and kept them in a vault where when they were working on new material, Page has unleased these tracks that never found their way to their previous three albums. “The Rover” is one of my all time favorite tracks so Page uses the Phaser effect and delivers a catchy and killer guitar riff. “In my Time of Dying” is Led Zeppelin’s best long song, with a lot of guitar overdubs, from heavy blues to distorted slide, and Plant blasting on vocals about a man being on his death bed, while Bonham hammers with catchy drum fills when the band kicks it up a notch. “In the Light” is another progressive rock track that’s very underrated, often overshadowed by its famous sister, “Kashmir.” “Ten Years Gone” seems to be forgotten with some of the most poetic lyrics written by Plant as he reflects on life. “Down by the Seaside” is their take on a surf song but it becomes heavy in the middle. “Black Country Woman” is another take on folk rock, with the band actually recording outside and a plane can be overheard in the very beginning, with the members asking Jimmy to cut it out before Robert joining in, “nah, leave it, yeah.” “The Wanton Song” is a catchy bluesy, hard rock that seems to be forgotten. “Trampled Under Foot” is a bluesy and funky tune that’s also very underrated and obscured by other tracks on the album.

1. Led Zeppelin IV, 1971. There is no doubt Led Zeppelin exploded with their fourth album. It’s an amazing feat that only with eight songs, this album became an instant classic, and majority of the album, to this very day, still gets played. Though I would argue that these songs do often get overplayed, there’s something about them that somehow they never get too annoying to listen to, and that’s quite rare for songs that are repeated on radio stations. The kickass opener, “Black Dog” is catchy, blues song that was untitled until a black dog came in and bit Bonham during a recording, or so they say. “Rock and Roll” is another well known track, with catchy guitar overdubs and Plant hammering on the vocals, with Bonham ending the song with one of the best drum solos in rock history. “The Battle of Evermore” is a return to the folk rock the band experimented with their previous album. Here, Robert sings with Sandy Denny, as Page plays a mandolin. This track is simply underrated as Plant really delivers near the end with a delay effect. “Stairway to Heaven” is of course a classic progressive rock tune that mixes both folk and blues rock, with Plant sings poetic lyrics that many, to this day (and Plant himself) still don’t quite know the song’s true meaning. “Misty Mountain Hop” is another catchy, near funk tune that gets a slight overlook compared to other tracks, with Plant questing for better society. “Four Sticks” was another untitled track, with Bonham playing his drums with four drumsticks instead of the standard two. The song is in an odd timing, giving the track a bit more progressive rock feel. “Going to California” is another folk tune about one’s quest looking for love and settlement. “When the Levee Breaks” is simply one of the best Zeppelin tunes, and perhaps their best closer on an album they’ve ever done. It’s a bluesy, hard rock song with slides and overdriven guitar while Plants blows it out of water with harmonicas. The lyrics about going to Chico before the local dam breaks and floods the area. Without this album, Led Zeppelin probably wouldn’t have become a staple in all of rock and roll.

[rohan018]

Crystal Olry

Crystal is a solid material whose constituents are arranged in a highly ordered microscopic structure, forming a crystal lattice that extends in all directions. I think this definition by Google/Wikipedia suits the person I’m talking about. Crystal, makes a strong foundation with relationships and spreads her love in all directions, like a flower that doesn’t hold back its smell, she doesn’t hold back on her warm and friendly nature.

She would call me her Guru but in a true sense, it’s me who learnt a great deal from her and most importantly how to keep smiling even when you feel like a zombie. I often wonder what can I call my relationship with her, teacher-student, buddies, sister-brother, but then I thought what is the need to name something which is original. We feel happy when we are together and that’s all that matters.

Last year after trying to settle in Bloomington, Indiana with Stuti who was already there since sometime, I sent out a few emails to the Yoga studios around looking for volunteering jobs. There were some positive replies but they weren’t working out for me because of the distance and we didn’t have a vehicle too. It is difficult to commute without your own vehicle in small towns in the USA and being a university town, the bus services would start post 7.30 am during holidays for the route to the studio. In the meantime, Stuti and I got an opportunity of attending the first class for free at Ekah studio through MINDBODY app where we met a pretty looking Yogi with a heart of gold, Sarah, who was conducting a hot yoga class which was our first experience and I could perform Titibhasana for the first time, however, I’m not inclined towards artificially heated environment. After the class while talking to Sarah about my experience into Yoga and that I was looking to volunteer, she mentioned the name Crystal, who owns the studio and Sarah said that Crystal is looking for volunteers. I also realised that I had sent an email to her already. Crystal, at that time was on a vacation with family and was expected back in a week’s time. Crystal and her partner Steve, love traveling and they would explore new places every month. That’s one thing about her which I found to be so wonderful because for me traveling is what gives us so many ideas, we get to explore things we have never imagined, meet different kinds of people and experiencing different cultures.

After about 6-8 days, Crystal Olry called me saying she got back from her holiday. She read my email and also Sarah told her about me. We fixed up our meeting for early morning at a place called Blooming Foods, which I really enjoyed because of the coffee & organic stuff they serve. Stuti & I often went there. Crystal called out to me in a soft tone. It was easier for her to spot me as compared to me who was looking for her in a place where most of the people appeared fit, having healthy breakfast and also because of the skin colour, as I was the only brown skinned person in that place. Just like her name her eyes are crystal clear and shine bright like a diamond displaying every emotion in them. Crystal asked if I would like to eat or drink something but I wasn’t sure how it goes in an informal meeting in the west, so I refused. She took a look at my certificates and instantly said I wish I could go for these courses too (and I understand being a mother is such a big responsibility.) I’d like to introduce you to Ella who is the cutest girl I know and is the apple of everyone’s eye. I had never seen a baby who can smile all the time, even after waking up and before dozing off. Again, the reason for Ella to be happy all the time is because Crystal is always joyful, dancing, entertaining and never tired to play with her. Whenever I see both of them meeting after a couple of hours, gives so much pleasure for the way they both greet each other. It is a sight a third person would want to capture.

Crystal has been a guardian angel, I can say. She would bring banana cake for me to the early morning class, she would offer rides whenever she would have time, leave thoughtful cards in the class with my name on them and so many things that are impossible to describe her compassion towards everyone. Couple of times my bicycle broke down and she gave me her bike until I would like to keep it. When you don’t hold on to attachments, you get only love in return which is the biggest asset one could earn and take along. She would treat me and Stuti often at cafes. Just a little info here that I love coffee and trying different ones; and I have a sweet tooth too. I can have both everyday in every meal and still not gain significant weight. I have been struggling to gain some weight in last one year.

I had invited few friends for Stuti’s birthday and was trying to get a similar cake that I had gotten for her the previous year from Rainbow bakery which is a vegan store and we loved the Lavender cake but unfortunately, the management had changed and they stopped selling cakes and had only cup cakes and cookies. To my rescue was Crystal, who offered to help me out by baking a cake. I had forgotten to tell her that Stuti doesn’t even like eggs in the cake so it was a tad challenging for her to make, I guess. She took up the task bravely and it was the best cake I have ever had and I mean it. So much so, that I requested her to make one more as a parting gift and juggling between her job, studio, Ella and self practice, she could make one for me. I can never forget this sweet gesture because it meant so much to me. I also felt bad because I knew Crystal’s schedule.

Stuti’s birthday was a fun day and few friends made it very special. Everyone who came loved one thing the most and that was the cake. I didn’t know until a week back that Crystal has started writing the recipes on her website and mentioned our names. Love reciprocates. Our energies are in constant touch with the universe and when we know that a friend thousands of miles apart is thinking about us, it can’t be more gratifying. Becoming a Yogi makes us sensitive towards everything and in return, there is so much love which once we craved for, is unlimited.

Crystal also started coming home twice or thrice a week to practice Asanas with me and it is always a learning experience as a teacher because a teacher can see different bodies responding differently during practice so a sense of understanding is created. Crystal complains of severe back ache which is on and off in her case but she understands her body and never pushes too hard which is an important thing to keep in mind while practicing any form of exercise. She is a quick learner and started chanting starting & ending prayers and Surya Namaskara Bija Mantras in Sanskrit which is commendable. She has also kept my style of teaching incorporated with her style at her studio at the same times in the morning. Crystal is like the Himalaya who is steady, grounded

and ever flowing with love. She is a believer and doesn’t stop half way. She once took up a task of converting a spot outside the studio into a Mandala, literally meaning circle. It is a spiritual symbol in Hinduism and Buddhism. Specifically, what we helped her in achieving is to make a garden by planting herbs and designing it like a mandala. I had no knowledge about gardening and because of Crystal, I could learn a few basic things which I have been trying to do in my apartment society but it is highly difficult to convince people to do that in India. We chose to die a slow death of pollution everyday and spending huge amounts on a doctors fee in installments but spending a fixed sum becomes an issue, mainly because it is an unexplored area of no significance. I, sometimes wonder, Yoga being born in India teaches us to be compassionate, however, I hardly meet or see people with a kind heart here as compared to the people in a lot of other countries. I understand that a huge population can be quite competitive but people like Crystal remind us that goodness cannot be replaced with any other emotion. She once asked me if I can help packing for her friend who was moving to another town and it was a paid job. Steve and Crystal worked so hard that day and were extremely generous in paying an unexpected amount. On top of it, they took me and Stuti out for dinner. She has always been very generous in her actions and though I always felt very awkward to accept whatever she did for me, her parting words would make the situation comfortable.

Crystal has a patient ear and even if she knows what the other person is talking about, she wouldn’t care to interrupt. I would always feel that I am giving her a piece of information, where she would talk about the point in more detail once I’m finished talking. I regret not attending more of her classes which were truly invigorating but she made it a point to attend as many of my classes as possible. Her presence in the class brought more energy and confidence in me. There are so many Crystals in the world doing quiet and peaceful work. They all need an ovation for not being a part of the ever changing society of competition. There are many more things about her which I would like to mention here but apologetically, I cannot, due to space. Things which I will always remember are when we met for the last three times. One was my last class at Ekah where at the end Crystal reminded me of a time when both of us choked by the idea of me leaving the town and she had said that the time to have a tear drop will come but not today and the time had come.

Second, she invited Sarah, Quinn, Stuti and me for the last dinner at her place and asked each one to share something on the table which could be a prayer or anything we would like to talk about. I still remember what Steve said and he was the first one to speak. This couple is so loving and welcoming that it was getting more and more difficult for us to depart. Everything was prepared by them and Crystal is undoubtedly the best cook.

Lastly, on the next day, we went to say goodbyes and the moment we met, Crystal gifted me a bracelet which was exactly what I was looking for and had exchanged emails with a store owner in Bloomington for the same. I was surprised because it was not long ago that I was looking for Om or Ganesh on the bracelet. We couldn’t stop our emotions and burst in tears. We didn’t say much but we knew that we are losing a precious feeling of being together. Of course, this friendship has only blossomed beautifully and we will remain great friends forever but knowing that you will not meet a special person again in your life for an indefinite period makes it hard to bear the pain. There is not a single morning that I don’t remember Crystal, Steve and Ella. Six months of togetherness was pure ecstasy and the time apart will only fill the ocean of love with droplets of longing to meet. I bow down to the supreme in her and wish to see the beautiful family making a difference with their undifferentiated and childlike love.

[getitinbusan]

Jungkook's first love. Angst and smut, inspired by the song California.

It was a rare rainy August day in California. The heavy drops created a sad melody on the window as you put the dishes away. Tired and lonely, the feeling in your gut kept nagging at you, maybe it was time to give up. 

It was the second month of not making rent and it was only a matter of time before your roommates would stop exchanging house cleaning duties for money. 

Standing in the kitchen feeling stupid, It had taken you way longer than it should have to realize in LA you were nothing. Not pretty enough, rich enough, skinny enough or talented enough.

Gathering up the mail that was strewn across the countertop, you shuffled through to sort priority. Junk mail, bills, personal… one standing out in particular. The penmanship was nice, black ink, unassuming envelope, but it was the stamp that caught your attention, it was sent from Korea.

The top had already been torn, the letter having been read, was cradled back safely inside. Addressed to your roommate a frown crept onto your face, why wouldn’t he write to you?

It was a ridiculously  hopeful notion but you widened the envelope and inhaled trying to find his fragrance, something, anything to trigger a happy memory. How many times had you borrowed his sweater just to have his smell on your skin? Cool California nights were the best excuse to wrap yourself in his scent.

You missed him, it had been a year and a half since he’d last come around.

It was too tempting to resist, your fingers pinched the paper inside of the envelope and pulled it free. 

I’m feeling low, I don’t know who I am, only who I’m supposed to be.

What would life be like if I had stayed in California? We could all be roommates, hanging out and having fun, going to the beach on weekends.

Does she even think about me?

It sounds greedy that with how much I have right now, it’s not enough. I would give anything to wake up in bed beside her everyday. I want more than anything to be able to talk to her about these things but I can’t. I've made the mistake of trading her for fame and now I’m destined to keep her at an arm’s length so she’ll never know the price I paid.

How does she even see me now?  Just an Idol? Has she forgotten the days we spent together?

I’ve been wrestling with myself, whoever that is. I wish I could be the teenage boy from that long ago summer again. I wrote this song thinking about it…

~When I see you smile in the screen

You’re good at everything

You’re just perfect

Feels like I've never been you

Do you even see me?

Do you know who I am?

Or how do I look now?

You don’t like me like that

I want to be your decalcomania~

I’m afraid I may not get back for a while, please write. Your friendship and thoughts of Y/N are the only things that are keeping me tethered to some semblance of reality.

JK

Clutching the letter to your chest, your mind took you back to that day. 

“Decalcomania, the art or process of transferring pictures and designs. Making a copy of the original on a different medium"  

You’d both laughed at the strange name, reading the description of the art on the museum wall during your visit so long ago.  

California had lured you into its promise when you turned 14. Having been accepted to an  intensive dance program at The Movement Lifestyle Studio you packed up and headed West for the summer. 

It was July and it was hot, the dancers stepping off the bus one at a time took their places in the studio.

Looking around there were so many older kids, you were probably one of the youngest. Calling out names they put you into groups, it appeared to be by age so you made your way to the tiny gathering of four.

Shy introductions were made as one more member was ushered over to where you had congregated. "This is Jungkook.” 

He had the cutest smile and barely spoke english but his eyes twinkled like the constellations. Immediately drawn to each other you became fast friends.

Absolutely exhausted at the end of the first few days he’d knocked at your door.

He was homesick and lonely, used to being surrounded by his six members, he couldn’t sleep well without someone beside him. You let him crawl into bed with you, you were 14 and it was innocent. 

Inseparable, days and nights were spent side by side, the others began referring to you as the twins. It was the best summer of your life but like every boy meets girl summer story, it had to come to a close. Promising through tears to keep in touch and stay friends you went your separate ways. 

Jungkook would send silly videos of his practice sessions, goofing around with the other members.  He’d facetime and text but he always loved to send handwritten letters.

They lived in a box under your bed and contained stories of how hard he was working to become an idol. He always signed off with, "I miss you" and a few lines of lyrics he’d written.

You didn’t know then how important they would become, the only tangible piece of him you could still hold on to.  

Whenever he came back to America you did everything you could to see him. You went to the small tour stops when they came through in 2015, KCon in 2016, but 2017 was different.

Facetiming you with the news that they were bringing the Wings tour to NY, Chicago and Anaheim, he asked if you’d be part of the dance crew. How could you turn down two weeks with Jungkook? They were getting bigger, more popular and their lives were changing rapidly.

Jungkook would sneak you into his hotel room so you could spend your nights catching up. He had strict rules. Girls were not allowed and even though it was just friendship, it could be easily misconstrued by the fans. Everything had to be done in secret. The boys would bring in food and cover for him while you both stayed locked away out of sight.

While happy to be with him, you could tell there was an underlying sadness he was holding on to.

“I wish I could go and explore the city with you like we used to,” his voice trailed off.

You were laying in each other’s arms cuddling on his bed.  Leaning over he kissed the top of your head.

“All I really want is  to take you on a proper date."

Your head moved on his chest as he inhaled deeply.

"I’ve been waiting so long to become someone, to become a man worthy of your affection. Now I’m stuck, I have everything and I’m not allowed to share it with you.”

His arms gripped you tighter, “I’m sorry, this is a terrible confession. I don’t expect you to love me back, not under these circumstances, I just need you to know, you’re the only girl I’ve ever loved and there won’t be anybody else, ever." 

You remembered every word of his confession, every moment of that last night in the hotel room. The words of a 19 year old boy whose life had become bigger than the feelings of two people.

He left in the morning without knowing. You were too afraid to tell him, you loved him too.  

LA became home right after the they left Anaheim. Focused on dancing, if you became good enough maybe you could join the tour with him. 

A letter with a big bouquet of flowers arrived a few weeks later. 

"Congratulations on your new house in LA!

I hope that all of you are getting along as roommates, it’s hard living with others sometimes.

Last night I dreamt that I was there with you and all our friends, we were having a party on the beach and we sat together and watched the sunset.

Remember after practice we would skateboard as fast as we could to the ocean so we wouldn’t miss the colors?

Maybe one day my toes can feel the sand there again.

I miss you, I miss me… the me I am when I get to be with you.

We are coming back in November for a few days and I’m hoping I can see you, I’m lonely already.   

Jeongguk

~Won’t you please stay in dreams

I can hear the sea from far away

Across the dream, over the bush

Go there where it becomes clear

Take my hands now

You are the cause of my euphoria

When I’m with you, I’m in utopia~

When The AMAs came, all of your friends in LA were involved with the production. Your roommates helped organize the coup to steal Jungkook away so you could take him on a real date.

Having enlisted Namjoon to help, the boys would cover for his whereabouts. The day before the awards they were only scheduled for styling, as long as he wasn’t late for the press rounds the next afternoon your plan could work.

It was Namjoon’s job to get him out of the building. Telling him to follow his lead, Joon convinced the managers that Jungkook must have eaten something bad for lunch. Claiming to not feel well, he was whisked away to meet you at the hotel's back receiving door. 

Sitting in the shiny red rented convertible you tossed him a pair of sunglasses. What you wouldn’t give now to see that smile again.

Barely giving him time to get in you’d sped away heading straight for In And Out Burger.

"Kookie, I hope you're ready for the best day of your life! We’re going to eat until we explode, drink and party at the beach and then, instead of returning you to your fancy 5 star hotel you’re staying the night in my crappy little house with a tiny uncomfortable bed!!” 

He laughed, so pure and happy, thinking about it now made you sad. Was that the last time he got to be his true self, Jeongguk the man not Jungkook the personna? 

Knowing you only had one day to give him everything, one day to show him you loved him, you tried to make the best of it.

Picking up the food Jungkook held onto the red and white bags in the passenger seat, sneaking his hand in to steal fries when he thought you weren’t looking. If you weren’t sure you were in love with him before you you certainly were now.

Pulling up beside the tree on the beach he was stunned, “Ahhh Jagi, I can’t believe you brought me here.”

Happy that it meant as much to him as it did to you, you both sat on the branch and ate. Two blocks from the old studio this used to be your escape. Every break you’d make your way to the tree for time alone, together. 

With the burgers done he turned to you and smiled. It felt like he wanted to say something, cutting him short you pulled him up and back towards the car.

Making your way to the Movement studio the students were starstruck when he walked in. After insisting that he teach some choreography, he reluctantly led the class.

Your eyes were glued to him as he moved in front of the mirrors, no longer that awkward teenager but a full grown man mesmerizing you with every move.

Getting back to the car he stopped you before you reached for the handle. Putting his arms around you he pulled you in close, “You stink Jungkook, I think our next stop is the ocean.”

You remember pulling away, how stupid you were, you should have held on to him longer. Reaching into the back seat you revealed a pair of swim shorts and a towel. He looked disappointed that you kept interrupting his attempts at intimacy, but you had a plan and limited time to execute it. 

The Ocean was cold but the wind was warm, he came out of the change room with the shorts on but was still wearing his shirt.

“Kookie, this isn’t Korea, you don’t have to be so modest here. Plus, you should grab some sun, you may not believe it but when your skin is sunkissed… you look really good.” 

He raised his eyebrows and quickly removed the shirt at your request.

Running into the water you splashed and played and he took great pleasure in picking you up and throwing you as far as he could.

The sun was getting ready to set and you wanted to dry off before the cooler air set in.

Leading him out of the water you both laid down on the towel. He put his arm around you under your neck and you cuddled into his side.

“My god Guk, look at your abs!”

He blushed like crazy as you traced the muscles on his stomach.

“Stop, it tickles,” he giggled.

But you didn’t, you kept tickling him until he held you so tight you couldn’t move. He had you pinned, flipping you on your back he shook his wet hair flinging water droplets all over you. Pleased with himself he leaned in closer to you, his eyes asking for permission to kiss you. As the gap between you got narrower you could hear his name being shouted and footsteps running closer. He flopped onto his back and sighed as your roommates and friends piled on top of him.

Eating, drinking and catching up with everyone you watched each other from across the bonfire. Moving from person to person he slowly made his way back to your side.

“Welcome back,” running your hand through the back of his hair, it was now or never. 

Pulling him closer your lips finally met in the way they were destined, soft, slow and full of love. His hands instinctively moved to cup your face as the world stopped around you.

“I love you,” you whispered.

Nose to nose he smiled at you and it was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen.

It didn’t last long, his phone started going off incessantly. The managers knew, you'd been careless, photos and videos of him from the studio had been posted online.

“I’m so sorry Jungkook, I didn’t mean for you to get in trouble.”

His eyes turned hungry as he grabbed your hand.

“Let’s get out of here, you promised I wouldn’t be going back to my hotel tonight.”

If he was going to get in trouble anyway, why stop now?  

The drive back to your place was quiet,  adrenaline and hormones flowing like electricity through you both. The time for smiling was over as the seriousness of the situation hung in the air.

It wasn’t just being in trouble or being caught, but the fact that you both knew what was going to happen when you stepped into your bedroom. One act that would change everything between you, holding the power to change the dynamic of your relationship forever.

Leading him to your room you closed the door and stood staring at him as he sat on your bed. He raked his fingers through his hair before he spoke, “I’ve never wanted anything more in my life than to be able to make love to you. BUT I also know that when I leave I’m not going to get to see you again for a very long time. Management is going to do everything to keep us apart and that won’t be fair to you. I think that maybe we should just let our happy memories of today be enough, I don’t want you to get hurt." 

Walking closer you stood between his legs and he wrapped his arms around your waist.

"The only way I can be hurt is if I never get to experience all of you. I can’t live not knowing how it feels to be totally yours if only for the night.”

He rested his head against your chest, “You’ll always be mine.”

His hands traveled to the hem of your shirt and his fingers ran over the soft skin of your stomach. Undoing the button of your jeans he slowly slid them down your legs and you stepped out of them. 

Standing up he lifted the thin fabric of your shirt over your head and you stood before him waiting as he took his off too. Unclasping your bra he sighed as he looked at you taking in your shape, his fingertips hovering over your hard nipples.

“I’ve never done this before,” he confessed.

“Me either,” you whispered, “So, I guess the bar's pretty low.”

His giggles cut the tension before he pulled you on top of him onto the bed. More relaxed he let his mouth start exploring your body. You were goosebumps and shivers beneath him as his tongue found it’s home between your legs.

He was soft and careful, placing his lips over your clit sucking it in delicately until your moans couldn’t be contained any longer. You could feel his eyes burning into you as he watched in awe as his finger slid inside you.

“It feels good Kookie, please…”

He sighed as his mouth picked up speed and another finger slid in. Moving your hips to meet his mouth you were unravelling quickly.

“The way you taste is better than anything I had imagined.”

Devouring your clit in sessions  between his words you came hard on his tongue.

“I made you so wet,” he said, impressed with himself.

Moving up to where your head lay on the pillow he pushed the dampened hair off your face, “Are you ok? Do you need anything?”

He placed his forehead against yours.

“Just you Kookie, I love you so much… I want you so badly.”

Moving slowly he lined himself up with your wet entrance.

“Tell me if you need me to stop okay?”

He pushed slowly and you could feel yourself stretching around him. He watched your face and froze when he saw the tear roll out of the corner of your eye.

“I’m so sorry, let’s stop, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

He thumbed away the tear.

“No, baby… I’m okay… I’m just so happy, so overwhelmed with how much I’m feeling right now.”

He smiled down at you, pressing his body closer as he gave another push until he was fully inside. Your bodies fell into a beautifully choreographed rhythm until Jungkook was so lost in pleasure he began to move at his own pace. Quicker and deeper he moved until he finally spilled into the condom. 

You kissed, and kissed, and kissed until you fell asleep wrapped around each other.

Every few hours he’d wake you up, checking to make sure it wasn’t a dream, you'd made love each time, everytime better than the last.

It was 9 am when he caressed you awake once more.

“I have to leave soon. I don’t want to,” he spoke nestled into your neck just under your ear, “Please tell me to stay.”

Your heart broke at his words, “If I ask you to stay, I’m selfish, you’ll always wonder if you made the right decision. If I tell you to go, your dreams come true… ” your voice trailed off...

“And I’ll always wonder if I made the right decision,” he finished. 

Your phone started ringing and you knew time was up.

It was Joon, “I’m outside, sorry, I held them off as long as I could. I told them I’d come get him so you could at least have time to say goodbye.”

Your tears fell out in heavy ugly sobs, “Okay, five minutes… and Joon… thanks, I know you’re probably in trouble too.”

Hanging up you turned back, Jungkook was already out of bed with his clothes thrown on. He stood with open arms waiting, 

"Thank you for yesterday.“

Laying your head against his chest you took a moment to listen to his heartbeat. You could hear him sniffle, and knew he was crying.

You flashed back remembering that night long ago when he came to you homesick, holding you so he could sleep while he tried to hide his tears. There was a knock at the door and Namjoon’s voice broke through the moment.

"We’ve got to go Jungkook.”

Stepping away you’d left his shirt soaked in tears, handing him his sweater he pushed it back towards you, “You keep it.”

He kissed you one last time and turned the handle opening it to reveal Namjoon. His Hyung put his arm around his shoulder and led him to the car.

Turning one more time his eyes were filled with tears and he gave a small wave before getting in the back of the big black sedan. 

For months you pretended that management was the only thing keeping you apart.

You held onto your silly notions until May when they were coming for the Billboard awards. For weeks leading up you waited for a message, a secret meeting arrangement, but you got nothing. His image was all over the TV and his voice echoed through you empty heart and then he was gone again. 

Now, here you stood in your kitchen, his letter bringing him to the forefront of your mind,  opening old wounds.

He was just as sad as you but what could you do? Picking up a pen you began writing… 

I shouldn’t have done it but I read it in your letter

You said to a friend that you wish you were doing better

I wanted to reach out but I never said a thing

You don’t ever have to be stronger than you really are

And honey, you don’t ever have to act cooler than you think you should

You’re brighter than the brightest stars

You’re scared to win, scared to lose

I’ve heard the war was over if you really choose

The one in and around you

You hate the heat, you got the blues

You’re changing like the weather, oh, that’s so like you

I’ll pick you up

I’ll catch you on the flipside

If you come back to California

We’ll do whatever you want, travel wherever, how far

We’ll hit up all the old places

We’ll have a party, we can dance till dawn… 

Y/N

October came and a chill was in the air, the smell of winter hit your nose and you stopped to take it in.

Bundled in Jungkook’s hoodie you threw your bag over your shoulder and began your walk to work. Movement had hired you on for a new intensive program and today you were going to meet your students.

So many memories flooded your mind as you made your way through the familiar neighborhood. It still hurt but things were beginning to feel happy again. Writing the letter had given you closure, he knew how you felt and beyond that there was nothing else you could do.

Opening the heavy door to the studio you caught a familiar reflection moving in the mirror writing something on the glass, It couldn’t be?

Hearing the door click back into place he turned to face you,

“Hi.”

He walked towards you slowly, unsure of what your reaction would be, he approached with caution.

“Hi.”

You were breathless, in the months of not seeing him he’d grown more handsome.

“I can’t change what happened… and for the rest of my life I’ll be sorry for all of the time we missed.”

He was getting closer.

“But I can’t take another day not knowing if I can fix this… somehow…”

He reached for your hand but you pulled it away. His head fell in disappointment.

“Jungkook, I can’t listen to this… look at me.”

Reaching for his chin you pulled his head up until he was facing you again.

“I refuse to listen to you apologize for something that was out of your control. Your life was decided before you met me and I can only be grateful that I got to appear in some part of your story.”

He tilted his head and pressed a small kiss into the hand that was still holding his chin.

“God I’ve missed you” he said as he wrapped his arms tightly around your waist.

“How long are you here? I’ve got to teach class.. It’s my first day but I’d love it if we could catch up?”

He laughed at you and your knees buckled at the sound of his happiness.

Taking his chance he pressed his lips to yours and you could feel the smile forming on his face.

“I’m your private lesson Jagi, I’ve booked you for the next two weeks”

Taking a step back you had to ask, “How Jungkook? What will you be giving up?”

Pulling you back to his embrace he began to dance with you.

“There is no more giving up… on anything. Our contracts were over and I only had one thing I wouldn’t negotiate on…that’s you." 

Holding you tightly he moved you to look at the mirror.

"I wrote you something”

Please call my name one more time

I’m standing under the frozen light, 

but I’ll walk step by step towards you

Still with you

“Y/N, I promise I’ll never let you go again"

[idolizerp]

LOADING INFORMATION ON HEAVEN’S MAIN DANCE RYU EUNBI...

IDOL DETAILS

STAGENAME: Evie CURRENT AGE:  26 DEBUT AGE: 18 TRAINEE SINCE AGE: 15 COMPANY: 99 SECONDARY SKILL: Fashion design

IDOL PROFILE

NICKNAME(S): lemonie (due to her alleged lemon obsession), eve (due to the close proximity of her stage and group name with religious themes), peitho (in english, name of the goddess that personified persuasion and seduction, much like herown image). INSPIRATION: claims to be inspired by company seniors, as well as her parents’ work ethic. SPECIAL TALENTS:

speed dancing: has good choreographic memory, can accurately perform a variety of routines in different styles and at increased levels of speed.

physical flexibility: resulting from dedicated practice (especially in acro dance), she likes to impress with gymnastic manoeuvres such as front/side splits, and backbends.

NOTABLE FACTS:

has a reported IQ of 145

sang in a youth choir at a local church before joining 99 entertainment

has an eye for fashion, designed much of her own streetwear during heaven’s debut era

avid lemonade lover; fans often bring her lemonade beverages and lemon-themed accessories.

IDOL GOALS

SHORT-TERM GOALS:

within the next six to twelve months, while continuing to solidify her place in the fashion industry through various program and brand appearances, eunbi would like to focus on branding herself as a serious and well-seasoned dancer, despite being from a group whose choreography routines aren’t the most complex. if possible, and in attempt to generate additional buzz, she’d like to assist with heaven’s choreography, revert the public’s attention from the fact that her solo did poorly. she’s especially interested in having people see multiple sides of her through dance, rather than just 99′s fabricated version of her. in this way, not only would she continue to hone her dancing skills, but she’d effectively prove that such capabilities make her something more than just the member of heaven who flopped.

LONG-TERM GOALS:

in the long run, eunbi wishes to revel in levels of fame only graced by some of the legendary seniors before her. despite previous setbacks, she still wishes to have a successful solo career somehow, and avoid being forgotten during the eventual fall of third generation girl groups. however, bearing in mind the reality of the situation, eunbi also hopes to achieve a prominent position in the fashion world. well into the future, she’d like to manage her own multi-national luxury fashion conglomerate and have it see success in both domestic and international territory. the ability to showcase and model her own designs would be ideal, as to not resort to faceless background work. in addition, due to eunbi’s unwavering passion for dance, she’d like to continue honing and utilizing her skills. this could potentially be as a choreographer for the company, but as with other aspects of her career, eunbi wishes for her work to be highly publicized. she enjoys recognition.

IDOL IMAGE

following heaven’s formation, eunbi was presented to the public as the rosy-cheeked babe of heaven, the timid girl next door. evie, they’d called her. and evie was a riveting combination, a sultry mix of soft and sexy, and a poster girl when it came to tried-and-true summer styles. as a result, 99 marketed her in a manner meant to be appealing, but never to the extremes. she was to be balanced instead– innocence and cuteness, desire and allure.

as the years progressed and evie blossomed further into womanhood, however, she became the owner of a figure well-praised. her long legs and slender frame steadily rose to attention on forums, and netizens commented over again and again about the silhouette of her curves beneath loose clothing, her suggestive acts and how she was teasingly aware of them.

with more exposure and attention came more confidence and pride, more insight towards the power of her sexuality. evie eventually developed a tempting gaze,  a perpetual desire to test the waters and perform brazen movements for the stage. she made it a point to leave people wanting more, more, more. she was the girl next door, after all, forever and always ideal and desirable. but older now. wiser, too. more sure of herself. she’d transformed into the summer IT girl, a coquettish beach doll that could fascinate a room with even the most banal of activities. 

the general public loved to ogle at evie, loved to watch as she took a sip of water or climbed immaculately out of a pool. something about her was classically beautiful, captivating.

and she was theirs for the viewing, entirely; their sensual and soft toy; their gratifying object, available for consumption at the press of the button. she belonged to them, and for the sake of her career, eunbi adhered to the position. she yielded without complaint to the image her company had crafted for her, surrendered bits and pieces of herself until she was nothing but a shell of her former self.

the new version of her was perfect and polished, eyes dull, but spirit keen. she worked like a robot, making each decision through a strictly calculative mindset. she was always thinking, planning, plotting. life was about maintaining connections, to her. seeking opportunities.

if i move like this, will it encourage views? if i smile a little wider, would merch sales improve? if i was honest about my thoughts, how would people react?

as far as eunbi knew, there were always systematically correct choices to make, always the smartest decisions to propel her forward in the industry.

she’d thought it to be a curse, disguised as a blessing, but 99 continued to eat it up anyway. they regarded her ambition, her desirability, as something to generate profit from. and though she sometimes hated it, she allowed it, because the truth was like this: somewhere within the mental chaos and the management of her porcelain perfection, she’d achieved something.

she’d mastered the art of being ryu eunbi, and she held onto that dearly.

IDOL HISTORY

from a young age, her parents had demonstrated their strong drives, their unwavering ability to work hard. she watched, day by day, as they lost themselves to untouchable dreams, she listened and learned as they prioritized work over family. and it was okay, then. “you work so hard!,” friends and family would comment to her mother. strong work ethic, everyone thought. their behavior was inspiring, they were chasing their dreams. and perhaps that really was the case. her parents had been passionate about their respective careers, and through frequent absences, they’d instilled their daughter with the same excessive values. by five, she already knew work to be the number one focus in her life. her mother kept busy as a neurosurgeon, her father slept nights in his recording studio. as a result, eunbi was usually tossed off to the hands of a church, their choir program becoming an integral part of her after-school routine.

✦✦✦

eunbi was fourteen when her parents announced their divorce.

her response came in the form of a wayward tongue, bouts of rebellious behavior with a cold glare to match. though she insisted that she didn’t care, that she’d seen it coming, the school counselor suggested otherwise. “it’s not uncommon for children to display behavioral issues after divorce,” he’d said in a meeting with her mother once. her father, as usual, hadn’t been able to make it. he’d made up some lie, concocted a story about the recording studio and an unfinished track. as it’d been revealed later, however, in the later years, it wasn’t music that so often distracted him from the family he had at home. his interest gradually faded with the dawning realization that his career could never be helped, and instead, he sought comfort in other places. other women, other homes, as if the original hadn’t been sufficient enough for him. and eunbi’s backwards response to the truth of it left her mother with no choice but to give her an ultimatum.

focus on her studies (read: keep out of trouble), or face being exiled to a school abroad.

exasperated, but never allowing anger to cloud her logic, eunbi easily chose the former. in a questionable amount of time, she’d left behind the underage parties and drinking, switched it out for after-school study rooms and dance studios instead. when her head wasn’t dipped far into a book, brain crammed with formulas and facts, eunbi would dance; it’d become her way to distress, and she was a natural, indeed; her body a mere instrument in its ability to project movement so clearly and efficiently.

after a year of discovering her new hobby, it’d been announced through fliers on walls that 99 entertainment was in search of new trainees. more than fear of missing out, eunbi’s desire to participate was born out of a love, a thirst, for competition. of course, she enjoyed the idea of celebrity life too, the riches and fame and attention and gifts. but competition, it motivated her even more, always fueling her drive to be the best. and when the time arrived, when rumors of an upcoming girl group began swirling around company buildings, eunbi knew she needed to prove herself. she knew just how to do it, too; set herself apart from the remaining group of aspirants; excel in the areas that they simply could not. for her? that was dance. she focused consistently on perfecting her technique, working herself to exhaustion, day and night, on far too frequent of a basis. but it all paid off in the long run, those arduous routines, immoderate perseverance.

upper officials thought her to be a perfect addition to the group they had envisioned, and just like that, she was added to the lineup of their new girlgroup: HEAVEN.

✦✦✦

when heaven made their official debut in 2010, eunbi was far too young then to know better. eighteen, naive as possible, idol life never seemed like something that could constitute as a problem. instead all she saw was the cameras, the flashing lights, the television screens that were responsible for the pretentious display of her group. and it’d been fascinating, initially. distracting, a breath of fresh air from her toxic home life, her mother’s growing alcohol habit. it was a rush to film the music videos, a rush to perform on stages and be pampered with the likes of stylists or makeup artists. as time went on though, eunbi’s happiness slowly diminished. she grew unhappy with heaven as a group, the image 99 had curated for them. she’d never been a fan in the first place, but now she was tired, disturbed even, by the recycled concepts and corny songs that failed to represent her. she wanted more, felt desire burning in the pit of her stomach, this need to demonstrate that she was more than just a background member in the group. she had the potential to be a grand soloist; the ambitious drive and creative mind; the sharp singing skills, even sharper dancing skills.

when the company allowed her to try her hand at solo music, eunbi thought, genuinely, that it would all work out in her favor. she’d taken advice from company executives, went with what they considered “safely sexy” but public friendly. it didn’t matter that, as usual, the sound and style didn’t align with her personal tastes. she cared about having the song be well-received, having a catchy hit to blow up the airwaves. what she’d gotten though, turned out to be quite the opposite. 99 had failed in its venture to properly promote her, and the public had been no better either, failing her as well when they refused to react the way she had hoped for. rather than praising or hyping her up, the song became the subject of minor controversy, with many people criticizing it for its provocative choreography and “cheap, lazy” feel. in turn, it suffered from mediocre sales and lowly-placed positions on music charts.

evie the soloist simply wasn’t profitable enough.

✦✦✦

there were many intolerable aspects about working as an entertainer; taxing work schedules, outré speculation. the strict image constraints and lackluster concepts that’d been played out one, two, three times too many. despite everything though, heaven remained at the center of eunbi’s universe, forever and always her treasure. the fact that her solo career hadn’t worked out only solidified the idea – she was nothing without the group, nothing if she couldn’t stand tall and proud as heaven’s evie. since the release of the debut track, and all of its glorious aftermath, longevity became one of her main goals and continues to be so in present day. aside from personal endeavors in both fashion and dance, eunbi found it necessary to maintain the group’s relevancy, often working with her parent’s zeal to ensure their good standing. she feared the impending waves of new groups, the threat they posed to her position, to her group’s. and it was true, perhaps, that she needed to let go. heaven was going to disband eventually, she couldn’t cling onto them forever. but she wasn’t ready yet. heaven had become too big of a thing in her life, the life vest that’d kept her from drowning. until she successfully found an alternative, a path as equally as fulfilling, she refused to stop.

[theworstbob]

yellin’ at songs, week thirty-nine

Opinions on the songs which debuted on the billboard charts 4 october 1997, 6 october 2007, and 7 october 2017

10.4.1997

24) "The One I Gave My Heart To," by Aaliyah

I agree, '90s R&B. It IS sad when people you love hurt you. I used to think it was good when people you loved made you feel sad, but I've been listening to your arguments for the last few months, and you know what? You're right. People you love should make you feel good! Took a while, but I'm finally coming around to your side.

28) "Criminal," by Fiona Apple

So I'm on vacation from work, and I've been taking this time off to not think about anything and just sorta stare blankly at whatever the screen has to offer, so this is not a song for my current mental state. There's so much to unpack with this song, and I'm just not yet acclimated to thinking about what this song has to offer. I need to get back on that critical thinking horse, but I've been lazy the last couple days, aand like you know how difficult it is to concentrate on anything? Y'all givin' me shit like "I've got to make a play to make my lover stay, so what would an angel say? The devil wants to know," and I gotta try to frame it in some context or another, and meanwhile the Link to the Past rando tournament is right there. I can just turn that back on at any moment. Shit, dude. I'm sorry, Fiona Apple. I'm trying. You caught me at a bad time, but this is still probably the best song I've heard in a hot minute, so you've got that going for ya!

84) "Last Night's Letter," by K-Ci & JoJo

THANK YOU, 1997. This is how the list should've been ordered. Groove these '90s R&B slo jamz up the middle so I can make jokewords and get some practice thinking, THEN throw something with lyrical depth and whatnot at me. This song says "I'll love you always" before we even hit the first chorus. Follow Aaliyah up with this, then give me the country song that's gonna follow, THEN I'll be ready to say something substantive about Fiona Apple. Fiona Apple was a thing, right? Like, she would've pretty much been '97 Lena Dunham? Or would she have been a Woke Twitter Hero? I don't know, and it's too late to ever find out because the list has moved on to a song where two men with nice voices sing about passion and devotion. "I wrote this letter last night." Do you think they wrote "I wrote this letter" in the actual letter? Do you think they repeated the chorus in the actual letter? I hope so!

87) "Valentine," by Martina McBride & Jim Brickman

Imagine going to a hoedown, turning on the local country radio station, and hearing this. I mean, maybe this was a solid play for adult contemporary radio, I dunno who Jim Brickman is but I dobut he goes hard too often, but Tay Tay's "Red" was a #2 country single. It would follow that country would listen to anything Martina McBride, but like just... Every single bro country dude was weaned on songs like this. This was what country music sounded like before "i respect the flag AND the party" bullshit. I've made this point before, but it's worth noting, pop/country? That's a genre with a bizarre evolutionary line!

91) "Please," by The Kinleys

you could tell me these white girls are either sisters or two girls named kinley that happened to meet one day, and i would believe it. this is a song that would've been good enough to make the top 20 back when i only had like ten weeks of '97 to sift through, i would've said "yeah this is basic but it's not 'my baby daddy,'" but it's october and we've listened to so many other things and i've already forgotten what this was. country? sure. country. good job, country girls who probably named their kids Carson and Mackenzie.

95) "Go Away," by Lorrie Morgan

If you are using tumblr, your opinion of Marilyn Monroe has gone through three stages: 1) Marilyn Monroe is the epitome of glamour 2) Marilyn Monroe was basically Paris Hilton, like what did she do even? 3) HELL YEAH, MARILYN MONROE WAS PARIS HILTON. SHE WAS HOT AS HELL AND FUCKED ALL THE TIME. GOALS. This is the hottest country girl jam 1997 has provided, but it opens with some Marilyn Monroe cosplay, and this song is a hot jam in a way where it's like "hell yeah, I'd listen to this again!" and not "let's start a music discussion club to delve into the deeper meanings of this song. When she asks, 'Go away and wait a minute,' what does she mean?" so let's just goof on the video!

10.6.2007

53) "Do it Well," Jennifer Lopez

I heard the annoying Timbalandy intro and thought for sure 2007 was hitting us with more of that Kara DioGuardi. Nope! Ryan Tedder! Still a shitty Timbaland ripoff, that Latin pop jam J. Lo released a few months (and ten years) ago was way more in her wheelhouse than this, but I misidentified the bad songwriter who'd been tasked with wasting these three minutes of my life. Ryan Tedder's been doing things for ten years. I am so glad I'm an unexceptional white man, because it means life will never stop presenting me with opportunities regardless of whether or not I deserve them.

73) "1973," James Blunt

The fact that this song actually debuted at #73 makes me so happy. You have no idea. Like, this song is what you would expect the follow-up to "You're Beautiful" to be, James Blunt is trying desperately to show he has some edge and is also a Deep Thinker who doesn't look at girls and think about whether or not he thinks they're hot, he now tries to figure out a year in which she could have been beautiful. "Girl, you're so hot, you remind me of the year before I was born." Swoon. Such a serious artist, this one. Also: did you guys know three people are credited songwriters on "You're Beautiful?" Also also: there's a song called "2005" which is pretty much about "You're Beautiful?" Oh, James Blunt. I am prepared to fall down this YouTube hole someday, but not today. I have to figure out who Playaz Circle is.

91) "Duffle Bag Boy," Playaz Circle ft./Lil Wayne

Oh, 2 Chainz! That's who this is! Well, here I am, forgetting 2 Chainz existed as an entity before he was 2 Chainz and omitting him from the Decade Dance Club! Anyway, this is a song that presages Lil Wayne's extremely good decision to rebrand as a rock god, and it's, y'know, it's fine. It's an acceptable 2007 rap song, much like "Good Drank" was an acceptable 2017 rap song about half a year ago. I accept that this was ever in my life, and I will move on once I feel this paragraph appears large enough that someone could conceivably mistake this for in-depth analysis. What a large paragraph I wrote with no actual content! We have done good work.

94) "Freaky Gurl," Gucci Mane

Gucci Mane is another of the 35-member Decade Dance Club, and with songs like this, there's no shortage of reasons we've kept him around for so long! The way he only uses one flow so you don't get confused and think you're listening to multiple rappers. Intricate rhymes like in the third verse, where he ends six consecutive lines with "girl." And the way each verse only has eight bars so he can go back to the chorus is so polite, it knows why we came to the song and doesn't wanna screw around or seem indulgent with all those fancy A A A A A A rhyme schemes! Gucci Mane: ten years of greatness. Truly, something whose endurance I understand.

95) "Famous in a Small Town," Miranda Lambert

Miranda Lambert is one of my favorite country artists. I also get squicked out when millionaires sing lines like "Who needs their faces in a magazine?" You are incredibly famous! You don't get to sing this song! You are famous in several big cities! Don't sing songs revelling in mediocrity when you, yourself, are special! Like, Gucci Mane is awful, but at least he doesn't fuck around about the fact he owns a Hummer. He's not like "Don't worry if you can't afford a Hummer, life's not all about glamour!" he's saying, "Hell yeah, I got a Hummer. I fuck inside this big ol' car. You should get a Hummer. They're rad." Gucci Mane is a truth-teller, and we should respect that.

99) "Can't Help but Wait," Trey Songz

so like did they record one person clapping their hands and use that for every single '07 r&b song, or did they record hand claps every time they banged one of these out. i hope they made new hand clap noises for every song, it would make each song feel a little more personal, but i think all the studios just like shared the same hand clapping noise. i wonder whose hands they were that made this noise. this song is boring. why did anyone listen to this. they made this song a thousand times in 1997. seems like a waste of the handclaps.

7 October 2017

2) "rockstar," by Post Malone ft./21 Savage

"i cannot contain lyrical abilities of going so hard." what. why. why. who is this... i'm listening to this and wishing i was listening to a nickelback song. this is how fucking dire this song is. like legitimately. this song bites from nickelback, then has the audacity, the muthafuckin AUDACITY to say, "i can tell you're a lazy-ass aritst." preacher, heal thyself.

66) "Too Much to Ask," by Niall Horan

Niall Horan is a nice boy making nice songs and this is going to be another week where 2017 gives me absolutely nothing to work with, isn't it. I mean, I guess it's fine that Niall Horan is a person making John Mayer songs in a world where garbage like Post Malone rules the day, but why does he have to be John Mayer? Can't we do better than John Mayer? Is this really all we have to look forward to on the weeks that divas are not accompanied by an army of brass instruments, is maybe we're cool with Lorde but mostly the hope someone will sound like John Mayer instead of Calvin Harris? 2017, what ya doin'.

67) "Curve," by Gucci Mane ft./The Weeknd

No, sir, Gucci Mane has not lost a step in the last ten years! He's actually improved: this song is two and a half minutes long. Like, we're minimizing time loss, here. I know nothing good will happen. On some level, Gucci Mane knows he's not creating great, lasting art. Just talk about your dick for two and a half minutes and let me go back about my day.

85) "DNA," by BTS

My favorite was the one with the silver hair with the haunted voice because I think The Goth One is unexplored territory for boy bands and I'm glad that BTS has decided to be pioneers. I'm into this! It's dumb, loud pop music, but after so many months of dumb quiet pop music, I think it's high time we just let some young men dance their hearts out and sing about whatever grand emotion they're singing about, probably love, I don't know, I'm actually not ready to let go of this being a Kendrick cover. This is fun! Pop music should sound like Coke tastes, not how Coke makes you feel. This is a sugary little treat, and I'm glad that I was able to listen to it.

92) "Homemade Dynamite," by Lorde ft./Khalid, Post Malone & SZA

I like the original. I liked Melodrama because it sounded like its own thing, and this just sounds like something I could've gotten from any of the EDM bros. Khalid and Post Malone add their usual nothing, and with SZA, it's the same thing, I'd much rather listen to her on her own thing than her on someone else's thing. I dunno. I think y'all should've listened to this song before they felt like they had to ruin it with Post Malone. Lorde's great! I wish I could figure out why the general public rejected her but embraced Khalid!

Who won the week?

1997 because it had the only song I liked.

Current standings: 1997: 14 2007: 12 2017: 13 Next week: Elton John remakes “Candle in the Wind” for some reason, we insist on summoning old Tay Tay to the phone, and oh goddamnit 2017′s gonna give us Macklemore come on 2017 get it together

[getitinbusan]

Jungkook friends to lovers, angst and smut. Inspired by Lana Del Rey's California. Please leave feedback if you'd like more.

It was a rare rainy August day in California, the heavy drops creating a melody on the window as you put the dishes away. You were tired, lonely and the feeling you had in your gut kept nagging at you, maybe it was time to give up. Well into the second month of not making rent, it was only a matter of time before your roommates would stop exchanging house cleaning duties for money. Standing in the kitchen feeling stupid, It had taken way longer than it should have to come to the realization that in LA you were nothing, not pretty enough, rich enough, skinny enough or talented enough. 

Gathering up the mail that was strewn across the countertop, you shuffled through to sort priority. Junk mail, bills, personal… one standing out in particular. The penmanship was nice, black ink, unassuming envelope, but it was the stamp that caught your attention, it was sent from Korea. The top had already been torn, the letter having been read, was cradled back safely inside. Addressed to your roommate a frown crept onto your face, why wouldn't he write you? It was a ridiculously  hopeful notion but you widened the envelope and inhaled trying to find his fragrance, something to trigger a happy memory. How many times had you borrowed his sweater just to have his smell on your skin? Cool California nights were the best excuse to wrap yourself in his scent. You missed him, it had been a year and a half since he'd last come around.

It was too tempting to resist, your fingers pinched the paper inside of the envelope and pulled it free. 

"I'm feeling low, I don't know who I am, only who I'm supposed to be. What would life be like if I had stayed in California? We could all be roomates, hanging out and having fun, going to the beach on weekends. Does she even think about me? It sounds greedy that with how much I have right now, it's not enough, I would give anything to wake up everyday in bed beside her. I want more than anything to be able to talk to her about these things but I can't, I made the mistake of trading her for fame and now I'm destined to keep her at an arm's length so she'll never know the price I paid. How does she even see me now?  Just an Idol? Has she forgotten the days we spent together? I've been wrestling with myself, whoever that is. I wish I could be the teenage boy from that long ago summer again. I wrote this song thinking about it…"

~When I see you smile in the screen

You're good at everything

You're just perfect

Feels like I've never been you

Do you even see me?

Do you know who I am?

Or how do I look now?

You don't like me like that

I want to be your decalcomania~

"I'm afraid I may not get back for a while,  please write. Your friendship and thoughts of Y/N are the only things that are keeping me tethered to some semblance of reality."

JK

Clutching the letter to your chest your mind took you back to that day. "Decalcomania, the art or process of transferring pictures and designs. Making a copy of the original on a different medium"  You'd both laughed at the strange name, reading the description of the art on the museum wall during your visit so long ago.  

California had lured you into its promise when you'd just turned 14. Having been accepted to The Movement Lifestyle Studios intensive dance program in LA you left all your friends for the summer. You were going to be discovered! It was July and it was hot, the dancers stepping off the bus one at a time to take their places in the studio. Looking around there were so many older kids, you were probably one of the youngest. They called out names and put you into groups, it appeared to be by age and you made your way to the tiny gathering of four. Shy introductions were made as one more member was ushered over to where you had congregated, "This is Jungkook." He had the cutest smile and barely spoke english but his eyes twinkled like the constellations.

Immediately drawn to each other you became fast friends. Absolutely exhausted at the end of the first few days he'd knocked at your door. He was homesick and lonely, used to being surrounded by his six members and he couldn't sleep well without someone beside him. You let him crawl into bed with you, you were 14 and it was innocent.  Inseparable, days were spent side by side and the others referred to you as the twins. It was the best summer of your life. Promising through tears to keep in touch and stay friends you went your separate ways. 

Jungkook would send silly videos of his practice sessions, goofing around with the other members.  He'd facetime and text but he always loved to send handwritten letters. They lived in a box under your bed and contained stories of how hard he was working to become an idol. He always signed off with an I miss you and a few lines of lyrics he'd written. You didn't know then how important they would become, the only tangible piece of him you could still hold on to.  

Whenever he came back to America you did everything you could to see him. You went to the small tour stops when they came through in 2015, KCon in 2016, but 2017 was different. Facetiming you with the news that they were bringing the Wings tour to NY, Chicago and Anaheim, he asked if you'd be part of the dance crew. How could you turn down two weeks with Jungkook? They were getting bigger, more popular and their lives were changing. 

Jungkook would sneak you into his hotel room so you could spend the nights catching up. He had rules, the fans came first and girls were 

not allowed. Even though it was just friendship it could be easily misconstrued, everything had to be done in secret. The boys would bring in food and cover for him while you both stayed locked away out of sight. While you were happy to be with him, you could tell there was an underlying sadness he was holding on to. "I wish I could go and explore the city with you, like we used to," his voice trailed off. You were laying in each other's arms cuddling on his bed.  Leaning over he kissed the top of your head, "All I wanted was to take you on a proper date. I've been waiting so long to become someone, to become a man worthy of your affection. Now I'm stuck, I have everything and I'm not allowed to share it with you." His arms gripped you tighter, "I'm sorry, this is a terrible confession. I don't expect you to love me back, not under these circumstances, I just need you to know, you're the only girl I've ever loved and there won't be anybody else, ever." 

You remembered every word of his confession,  every moment of that last night in the hotel room. The words of a 19 year old boy whose life had become bigger than the feelings of two people. He left in the morning without knowing, too afraid to tell him, you loved him too.  

LA became home right after the tour left Anaheim. Focused on dancing, if you became good enough maybe you could tour with him. A letter with a big bouquet of flowers arrived a few weeks later.  

"Congratulations on your new house in LA! I hope that all of you are getting along as roommates, it's hard living with others sometimes. Last night I dreamt that I was there with you and all our friends, we were having a party on the beach and we sat together and watched the sunset. Remember after practice we would skateboard as fast as we could to the ocean so we wouldn't miss the colors? Maybe one day my toes can feel the sand there again. I miss you, I miss me… the me I am when I get to be with you. We are coming back in November for a few days and I'm hoping I can see you, I'm lonely already.   

Jungkookie

~Won't you please stay in dreams

I can hear the sea from far away

Across the dream, over the bush

Go there where it becomes clear

Take my hands now

You are the cause of my euphoria

When I'm with you, I'm in utopia~

When The AMAs came, all of your friends in LA were involved with the awards production. Your roommates helped organize the coup to steal Jungkook away so you could take him on a real date. Having enlisted Namjoon to help, the boys would cover for his whereabouts. The day before the awards they were only scheduled for styling, as long as he wasn't late for the press rounds the next afternoon your plan could work. It was Namjoon's job to get Jungkook out of the building. Telling him to follow his lead, Joon convinced the managers that Kook must have eaten something bad for lunch and wasn't feeling well, he was whisked away to meet you at the hotels back receiving door. Sitting in the shiny red rented convertible you tossed him a pair of sunglasses, what you wouldn't give now to see that smile again. Barely giving him time to get in you'd sped away heading straight for In And Out Burger. "Jungkookie, I hope your ready for the best day of your life! We're going to eat until we explode, drink and party at the beach and then instead of returning you to your 5 star fancy hotel you're staying the night in my crappy little house with a tiny uncomfortable bed!!" He laughed, so pure and happy, thinking about it now made you sad. Was that the last time he got to be his true self, Jeong-guk the man not Jungkook the personna? 

Knowing you only had one day to give him everything, one day to show him you loved him, you tried to make the best of it. Picking up the food Jungkook held onto the red and white bags in the passenger seat, sneaking his hand in to steal fries when he thought you weren't looking. If you weren't sure you were in love with him before you you certainly were now.

Pulling up beside the tree on the beach he was stunned, "Ahhh Jagi, I can't believe you brought me here." Happy that it meant as much to him as it did to you, you both sat on the branch and ate. Two blocks from the old studio it used to be your escape, every break you'd make your way to the tree for a time alone, together. 

With the burgers done he turned to you and smiled,  it felt like he wanted to say something, cutting him short you pulled him up and back towards the car. Making your way to the Movement studio the students were starstruck when he walked in. After insisting that he teach some choreography, he reluctantly led the class. Your eyes were glued to him as he moved in front of the mirrors, no longer that awkward teenager but a full grown man mesmerizing you with every move. You were careless, It didn't take long for the photos to hit social media. Getting back to the car he stopped you before you reached for the handle. Putting his arms around you he pulled you in close, "You stink Jungkook, I think our next stop is the ocean" You remember pulling away, how stupid you were, you should have held on to him longer. Reaching into the back seat you revealed a pair of swim shorts and a towel. He looked disappointed that you kept interrupting his attempts at intimacy, but you had a plan and limited time to execute it. 

The Ocean was perfect, and the wind was warm, he came out of the change room with the shorts on but was still wearing his shirt. "Kookie, this isn't Korea, you don't have to be so modest here AND you may not believe it but when your skin is sunkissed… you look like a god." He raised his eyebrows and quickly removed the shirt at your request. Running into the water you splashed and played and he took great pleasure in picking you up and throwing you as far as he could. The sun was getting ready to set and you wanted to dry off before the cooler air set in. Leading him out of the water you both laid down on the towel. He put his arm around you under your neck and you cuddled into his side. "My god Jungkookie,  look at your abs!" He blushed like crazy as you traced the muscles on his stomach. "Stop, it tickles." he giggled. But you didn't, you kept tickling him until he held you so tight you couldn't move. He had you pinned and flipping you on your back he shook his wet hair flinging water droplets all over you. Pleased with himself he leaned in closer to you, his eyes asking for permission to kiss you. As the gap between you got narrower you could hear his name being shouted and footsteps running closer. He flopped onto his back and sighed as your roommates and friends piled on top of him. Eating, drinking and catching up with everyone you watched each other from across the bonfire. Moving from person to person he slowly made his way back to your side. "Welcome back, Kookie," running your hand through the back of his hair it was now or never.  Pulling him closer your lips finally met in the way they were destined, soft, slow and full of love. His hands instinctively moved to cup your face as the world stopped around you. "I love you," you whispered, nose to nose he smiled and it was the most beautiful thing you'd ever seen. It didn't last long, his phone started going off incessantly. The managers knew, the photos and videos from the studio had been discovered online. "I'm so sorry Kook, I didn't mean for you to get in trouble." His eyes turned hungry as he grabbed your hand. "Let's get out of here, you promised I wouldn't be going back to my hotel tonight." If he was going to get in trouble anyway, why stop now?  

The drive back to your place was quiet,  adrenaline and hormones flowing like electricity through you both. The time for smiling was over as the seriousness of the situation hung in the air. It wasn't just being in trouble or being caught, but the fact that you both knew what was going to happen when you stepped into your bedroom. One act that would change everything between you, holding the power to change the dynamic of your relationship forever. Leading him to your room you closed the door and stood staring at him as he sat on your bed. He raked his fingers through his hair before he spoke, "I've never wanted anything more in my life than to be able to make love to you. BUT I also know that when I leave I'm not going to get to see you again for a very long time. Management is going to do everything to keep us apart and that won't be fair to you. I think that maybe we should just let our happy memories of today be enough, I don't want you to get hurt." 

Walking closer you stood between his legs and he wrapped his arms around your waist. "The only way I can be hurt is if I never get to experience all of you. I can't live not knowing how it feels to be totally yours if only for the night." He rested his head against your chest, "You'll always be mine," his hands traveled to the hem of you shirt and his fingers ran over the soft skin of your stomach. Undoing the button of your jeans he slowly slid them down your legs and you stepped out of them.  Standing up he lifted the thin fabric of your shirt over your head and you stood before him waiting as he took his off too. Unclasping your bra he sighed as he looked at you taking in your shape, his fingertips hovering over your hard nipples. "I've never done this before," he confessed. "Me either," you whispered, "So, I guess the bars pretty low." His giggles cut the tension before he pulled you on top of him onto the bed. More relaxed he let his mouth start exploring your body. You were goosebumps and shivers beneath him as his tongue found it's home between your legs. He was soft and careful placing his lips over over your clit,  sucking it in delicately until your moans couldn't be contained any longer. You could feel his eyes burning into you as he watched in awe as his finger slide inside you. "It's good Kookie, please…i can take more." He sighed as his mouth picked up speed and another finger slid in slowly. Moving your hips to meet his mouth you were unravelling quickly, "The way you taste is better than anything I had imagined." Circling your clit between his words you came hard on his tongue. "I made you so wet," he said, impressed with himself. "I need to feel myself inside you." Moving up to where your head lay on the pillow he pushed your damp hair off you face, "are you ok? do you need anything?" he placed his forehead against yours. "Just you Kookie, I love you so much, please… I want you so badly." Moving slowly he lined himself up with your wet entrance. "Tell me if you need me to stop okay?" He pushed slowly and you could feel yourself stretching around him. He watched your face and froze when he saw the tear roll out of the corner of your eye. "I'm so sorry, let's stop, I didn't mean to hurt you." He thumbed away the tear, "No, baby… I'm okay… I'm just so happy, so overwhelmed with how much I'm feeling right now" he smiled down at you, pressing his body closer as he gave another push until he was fully inside you. Your bodies fell into a beautifully choreographed rhythm until Jungkook was so lost in pleasure he began to move at his own pace. Quicker and deeper he moved until he finally spilled into the condom. 

You kissed, and kissed, and kissed until you fell asleep wrapped around each other. Every few hours he'd wake you up, checking to make sure it wasn't a dream, making love each time,  harder and faster. It was 9 am when he caressed you awake once more. "I have to leave soon, I don't want to," he spoke nestled into your neck just under your ear, "Please tell me to stay." Your heart broke at his words, "If I ask you to stay, I'm selfish, you'll always wonder if you made the right decision. If I tell you to go, your dreams come true… " your voice trailed off,  "and I'll always wonder if I made the right decision," he finished. 

Your phone started ringing and you knew time was up. It was Joon, "I'm outside, sorry, I held them off as long as I could. I told them I'd come get him so you could at least have time to say goodbye." Your tears fell out in heavy ugly sobs, "Okay, five minutes… and Joon… thanks, I know you're probably in trouble too." Hanging up you turned back, Jungkook was already out of bed with his clothes thrown on. He stood with open arms waiting, 

 "Thank you for yesterday." Laying your head against his chest you took a moment to listen to his heartbeat. You could hear him sniffle, and knew he was crying. You flashed back remembering that night long ago when he came to you homesick, holding you so he could sleep while he tried to hide his tears. There was a knock at the door and

Namjoon's voice broke through the moment "We've got to go Jungkook." Stepping away you'd left his shirt soaked in tears, handing him his sweater he pushed it back towards you, "keep it." He kissed you one last time and turned the handle opening it to reveal Namjoon. His Hyung put his arm around his shoulder and led him to the car.

Turning one more time he eyes were filled with tears and he gave a small wave before getting in the back of the big black sedan. 

For months you pretended that management was the only thing keeping you apart. You held onto your silly notions until May, they were coming for the Billboard awards. For weeks leading up to them you waited for a message, a secret meeting arrangement, but you got nothing. His image was all over the TV and his voice echoed through you empty heart and then he was gone again. 

Now, here you stood in your kitchen, his letter bringing him to the forefront of your mind,  opening old wounds. He was just as sad as you but what could you do? Picking up a pen you began writing… 

I shouldn't have done it but I read it in your letter

You said to a friend that you wish you were doing better

I wanted to reach out but I never said a thing

You don't ever have to be stronger than you really are

And honey, you don't ever have to act cooler than you think you should

You're brighter than the brightest stars

You're scared to win, scared to lose

I've heard the war was over if you really choose

The one in and around you

You hate the heat, you got the blues

You're changing like the weather, oh, that's so like you

I'll pick you up

I'll catch you on the flipside

If you come back to California

We'll do whatever you want, travel wherever, how far

We'll hit up all the old places

We'll have a party, we can dance till dawn… 

October came and a chill was in the air, the smell of winter hit your nose and you stopped to take it in. Bundled in Jungkook's hoodie you threw your bag over your shoulder and began your walk to work. Movement had hired you on for a new intensive program and today you were going to meet your students. So many memories flooded your mind as you made your way through the familiar neighborhood. It still hurt but things were beginning to feel happy again. Writing the letter had given you closure, he knew how you felt and beyond that there was nothing else you could do. Opening the heavy door to the studio you caught a familiar reflection moving in the mirror writing something on the glass, It couldn't be? Hearing the door click back into place he turned to face you, "Hi." he walked towards you slowly, unsure of what your reaction would be, he approached with caution. "Hi," you were breathless, in the months of not seeing him he'd grown more handsome. "I can't change what happened… and for the rest of my life I'll be sorry for all of the time we missed." He was getting closer,  "But I can't take another day not knowing if I can fix this… somehow…" he reached for your hand. Pulling it back away his head fell in disappointment, "Jungkook, I can't listen to this… look at me," reaching for his chin you pulled his head up until he was facing you again. "I refuse to listen to you apologize for something that was out of your control. Your life was decided before you met me and I can only be grateful that I got to appear in some part of your story" he tilted his head and pressed a small kiss into the hand that was still holding his chin. "God I've missed you" he said as he wrapped his arms tightly around your waist. "How long are you here? I've got to teach class.. It's my first day but I'd love it if we could catch up?" He laughed at you and your knees buckled at the sound of his happiness. Taking his chance he pressed his lips to yours and you could feel the smile forming on his face. "I'm your private lesson Jagi, I've booked you for the next two weeks" Taking a step back you had to ask, "How Jungkook? What will you be giving up?" Pulling you back to his embrace he began to dance with you, "There is no more giving up… on anything. Our contracts were over and I only had one thing I wouldn't negotiate on…that's you." 

Holding you tightly he moved you to look at the mirror,  'I wrote you something"

The only thing I can do

In the garden

In this world

Is to bloom a pretty flower that resembles you

And to breathe as the me that you know

But I still want you

I still want you

"Y/N I promise I'll never let you go again"