#i didnt grow up with dogs let alone show dogs

[bas-rouge]

I don't mean to sound bitter (I am, but I recognise that there is no one at fault and I cannot change the past), but it's a little frustrating to see people do everything they can for juniors at shows and kick young adults to the curb. I'm happy there are so many opportunities for juniors. I'm happy so many breeders are willing to gift juniors puppies. I'm happy for them, but I'm bitter that I never got to have those opportunities because my parents didn't support me and now I have to fight for that support. It's frustrating!

[mail-me-a-snail]

kicking my legs in the air. tell us more abt silvervance i am fascinated with whatever they've got going on

i mean. god where do i even begin.

so first off there's their main tag where i put all the posts that even vaguely remind me of them............like there are posts in there i would not show to my irls let alone god.

anyway. silvervance is the ship ever. they're both products of arasaka's influence, whether thru their own free will (in vance's case, or so he'd like to believe) or otherwise (in johnny's, vis-a-vis his eponymous prosthetic arm). they both manufactured their identities for an audience wider than themselves. they both recognize this similarity between them.

when vance came back 2 life with johnny in his head, he saw himself in johnny and he didnt like what he saw.

but as u know, in game canon, vance had no choice but to suck it up and bear the ghost's anti-corp, anti-capitalist, anti-night-city, rambling. oh woe! woe! is johnny silverhand, night city's last rockerboy turned co-pilot for arasaka's missing asset.

the thing is. the thing is. with everyone telling vance that the best course of action would be to excise johnny--with hellman telling him point blank that its not possible as well--he doesn't want johnny gone.

johnny becomes second nature to him, more than just a poltergeist who offers him snippy quips and lame one-liners. who likes annoying the hell out of him or who likes making him laugh by doing bits of physical comedy that johnny knows only vance will see.

he just grows to have so much. affection for this man. this man loser who he wishes he had known when things might've been simpler between them.

in the hypothetical good ending for silvervance where they get their own bodies, they're gonna move out to some colder state, somewhere that snows. they're gonna move as far away from local civilization as possible. but they're still gonna find merc work together because neither of them are quite suited to a domestic life.

they take each other's poisons when they finally separate; vance grows wolfish and snarky and johnny goes quiet and smiles a little too much like a dog, lips curled over his teeth. vance is brash and a risk-taker; johnny is loyal to someone other than himself for once.

they'll eat each other alive one of these days. they could not think of a better set of teeth to do it than one that so closely resembles their own.

in my heart n soul i know they find each other in every universe. not that they will happen upon each other; that they'll actively look for the other, not knowing who it is they're looking for at first, but just knowing that there is someone out there for them. i don't usually like throwing the term soulmate around but it's something a lot like that.

they'll find each other in the corpo rat au, they'll find each other in the father vance au, they'll even find each other in the ending where vance stayed with arasaka. there's no separating them and it drives me bonkers. insane, even. i wrote four fics in a haze for them bc of how much they drive me up a wall

anyway ty for the ask <3

[lvndrptchwrk]

Hiii, could I ask a baxter with a stylist/actor MC?

Cute dog for bribery

((the dog is like the cherry on top for this ask, reminds me of my own husky :3

also i have really good ideas for both a stylist and an actor so this is gonna be actor mc and ill make stylist mc its own post ! itll also be its own post cause this one became so long hgiasdfuseugw ))

step 3 baxter x actor!mc

-spoilers for baxter dlc !-

🔲 he first meets you when he goes to see the live performance at the bar

🔲 you were starring as the dramatic popstar, failing to hide their feelings for the bartender . your best friend is tired of the obvious pining between the two of you and incites the help of the audience to get them together

🔲 baxter is immediately entranced with your performance . the way you walked, talked, your outfit, your natural beauty . hes one of the few audience members that are interacted with, and took the chance to be the one to hand you the bouquet

🔲 he tamped down the rising feeling of jealousy as he had to say that it was from the bartender . it was merely a play, wasnt it?

🔲 the rest of the show went off without a hitch, and you and your costars bowed at the end

🔲 after the performance and a couple more drinks (merely fake drinks of course), he noticed that you were slumped over at the bar, the man you acted as your friend chatting amicably at the bartender

🔲 curious, he made his way over to you, asking if you were alright . the pretend bartender merely laughed at his concern, saying "ah dont worry about ol mc! theyre always wiped out after the performance but they are quite alright"

🔲 you took that time to lift your head up, glaring at the bartender before looking at baxter with a curious smile .

🔲 "ah, youre the one who handed me the bouquet. you did well, i like your hair"

🔲 baxter had mental whiplash with how relaxed and seemingly tired you were, despite your character having so much emotion

🔲 despite that, the two of you talked more, with occasional quips from the other two actors

🔲 he learned you were merely a year younger than him and had a part time acting gig here , but youve acted in school plays and musicals since you were in elementary school. the two of you hit it off, talking until he had to leave so they could close up for the nifht

🔲 he left the bar that night with your number and the promise to visit again

🔲 he stuck to that promise, and visited many more times, going to see you perform and talking to you when he can

🔲 he also texted you plenty , despite not being big on texting . he always wished you well before all your shows

🔲 the two of you even began to hang out outside of you performing, sightseeing the city and sunset bird, going to a lodge for a mini vacation and even introducing him to cove, terry and miranda . it was the funniest coincidence that he rented the condo in your neighborhood, and you two just missed out on seeing each other until now

🔲 he was excited to be included in your life, even if you two met on a whim . he knew however that his time in sunset bird would end soon and this would be behind him soon .

🔲 the end of summer was... hard . for baxter especially, he knew that he would leave eventually and all this would be is a slew of memories to be forgotten when he returns to virginia .

🔲 why bother to maintain the friendship when he knew it would have to end soon? forget about his growing affection for you, he couldnt bring himself to maintain a friendship, let alone tell you how he feels about you

🔲 he knew it would only hurt you in the end, so he kept quiet.

🔲 you were nothing but caring and kind towards him though . helping him pack, ensuring he didnt forget anything and keeping him company one last time

🔲 "well i suppose this is it. i hope you had a wonderful time in sunset bird baxter" you say as you give him a hug goodbye

🔲 this confused him . didnt you know he'd never talk to you again, that this was the last youd ever see of him ? he figured youd be distraught but you were simply acting like he would come back after a couple of days . he voiced this to you

🔲 "ive acted almost my entire life . people will come and go and ive learned that i cant control the people that stay in my life ." he saw the tears in your eyes now. despite what you were saying, its clear you were hurting . he didnt know how to feel about that

🔲 "be safe and break a leg out there baxter . "

🔲 that was the last time he heard from you, and it hurt him deeply . you never tried reaching out, but neither did he . he couldnt bear to see what you were up to on social media, the thought of seeing you again confused and hurt him

🔲 5 years past, and he slowly let that feeling go . he followed you on social media, saw how your talent was finally noticed and you began

🔲 he did his absolute best to keep track of everything you starred in, from movies to musicals and plays

🔲 if you were in a musical: he would buy or download the entire soundtrack and listen to it constantly

🔲 if you starred in a tv show or movie: he would binge it constantly, and it would automatically be his favorite

🔲 of course, hed watch as you went to premieres and red carpet events, dressed to the nines and blowing everyone away

🔲 his apartment would be littered in merchandise of you, along with characters youve played . anyone who sees his collection would think hes really into the character but its just because you played the character

🔲 his office is much more subtle, having a cup with a quote from your first ever major role on it, used to hold pens

🔲 seeing you again was purely coincidence . his work mates invited baxter out to see a local comedy show

🔲 had he not been so occupied with planning a big wedding, he wouldve known that you were in the area performing with friends in a small comedy show

🔲 seeing you walk on stage to perform had baxters world stopping . he felt like the only people in the world were you and him

🔲 you made eye contact with him, and for a moment he thought you didnt see him until he noticed that your smile became brighter and you suddenly looked more relaxed yet excited to see him

🔲 his heart was pounding throughout the entire performance . he had seen you act before, but it was always a different experience when seeing it in person and seeing you act here and now was no different

🔲 after the performance, baxter downright abandoned his coworkers as he made his way backstage towards you

🔲 you made eye contact with him and rushed over to him, hugging him like he would disappear the moment you let go

🔲 "you're here, it's really you . " you whispered, tears in your eyes

🔲 the last 5 years have been busy for you . shortly after baxter left sunset bird a talent agent had scouted you and your acting career took off

🔲 you would constantly travel or be busy acting and when you werent doing either, you were with your family or hiding from the paparazzi

🔲 but you never forgot him, and now he was right here in front of you . your feelings from him came flooding back in waves . you never had the courage to tell him how you felt before, but now you have the chance and you weren't gonna let him get away so easily

🔲 so you kissed him

🔲 he was initially surprised by the action, but couldnt help but return the gesture as well . it felt like the kiss raised several questions and answered everything

🔲 of course, baxter had to return to his coworkers, but he returned with you . they joked about him running off and congratulated you two on the newfound relationship

🔲 your fans would obviously have mixed reactions . the majority of your fans were extremely happy for you two, but there were always going to be haters

🔲 not that you minded, thats how it always was . baxter was there for you and thats what mattered

🔲you do your best to stay around and help him with weddings if needed . if you couldnt then he'd call and ask for your opinions or send pictures of his ideas

🔲 you would try to stay with him as much as possible, taking more local roles in the city or any neighboring cities but you'd have to take bigger roles once in a while

🔲 he'd support you endlessly, sending you encouraging texts and reminders to take breaks when necessary

🔲 you two attending premieres and red carpet events would blow everyone away . you occasionally got him to break out of his black and white scheme for these events and wear elegant outfits to stun everyone

🔲 whenever he wants to take you out on dates or out through the town, he totally understands having to disguise himself a bit along with you just so the time wouldn't be ruined by fans or paparazzi

🔲 most dates would end up being spent with home cooked meals or take out and a movie, but that was fine by him . any time with you was good time and worth waiting for

[happy-tori-friends]

mascot notes (i used precure mascots and jewelpets [sanrio supports genocide which i shouldnt have 2 explain Why That's Bad, but im simply using them references for if/when i draw or design them] for references. maybe i'll add pokemon like fennekin or buneary later)

lifty and shifty share a mascot and are a duo at the start because theyre together when they meet the mascot - maybe other characters will also share a mascot and be a team at the start but i've only really thought about the mains. i also didn't want to use the same animal as their htf counterpart so i kinda started winging it

so far...

lifty and shifty's mascot will be a fox, bc foxes are often associated with slyness and cunningness. au where they're tom nook and redd's adoptive sons and after their dad's divorced- i'm joking i'm joking. i've contemplated naming him lucky, but who knows if i'll stick with that. dont have any real personality notes though, but obviously he's willing to bribe them.

splendid's mascot will be a dog. specifically a dig with longer floppy ears. i dont know why, but him with a puppy resonated with me i also really miss my beloved hershey, and just having a pet in general. while they dont have a name or a gender yet, i'm imaging them to be a very loyal type who cheers everyone on and, when there's no fighting evil to be done, loves to play. if i go the high school route (or maybe even college route...) they are vety bad about accidentally causing disruptions and everything thinks that the stress of being a model student is making splendid lose his mind.

with splendont and flippy, i just chose animals i liked and are popular for cute magical animal characters. splendont is getting a kitty. personality-wise i'm not sure what i'll go for. maybe a stubborn and impulsive type that tends to push his buttons. or a graceful and calculated cat that is stoic and cold at first but shows a true warm heart as they grow close to others. the forner would have a lot of arguing, the latter would let them both bond over being similar, as well as let splendont show a slightly less confident kitty that they are worthy and kind despite taking time to warm up to others, that they aren't alone.

for flippy i chose a bunny bc i like bnunies. hippity hoppity. this bunny i think would be the most gentle, caring sweetheart ever - but if you hurt their fruends, they'll stop at nothing to get revenge. maybe a sad backstory with a friend dying due to the big bad, and wanting to help to stop the villains as an act of revenge, despite knowing it wont bring back their friend. thus would strengthen flippy's resolve as a hero - fliqpy was the one that wanted to do it for the most part, and flippy was nervous about it (canonically he Did join the army [though he probably wouldn't have in this au] but i think weird magical shenanigans are a lil more concerning bc a talking rabbit comes out of nowhere and tells you to magically transform and fight monsters, and while you do want to help and save people and fight for whats right, this weird magical business is weird and comcerning) especially because bunny seems so sweet and kind. fliqpy thinks revenge seeking is cool and as long as he gets to keep beating up monsters, he'll help bunny avenge their friend.

next i gotta think of transformation trinkets... probably a watch like the yes precure 5 bc im basic. (im not a yes 5 fan but. i read what happened at the end otona precure and 🫤 i. i uh dont like that. at least i didnt get invested, like the devil is a part timer... but i'll stop rambling about uncomfy endings. this a blog for the 'cute animals die gruesomely every episode' show)

[trashbinbackyard]

1-10, 20-30 for hibiscus and ipes

my god i should not estimate how long it takes to answer these adeagaqeh

A silly goose and very serious goose

1. What’s their full name? Why was that chosen? Does it mean anything? 

Hibiscus Nettle Baskerville, they were meant to be named Hyacinth bc purple but oopsy. They and their sister were named after plants

Nayla Hahn, her parents didn't put in the effort to give her a middle name. Doesn’t mean anything in particular. Her chosen name Ipes comes from the demon Ipos

2. Do they have any titles? How did they get them? 

Officially they’re “Lady Baskerville” bc noble and all that but they’d rather toss themselves into the ocean than have someone refer to them as that

She doesn’t have any official titles but she is known (at least underground) to be the drug kingpin of the outer rim

3. Did they have a good childhood? What are fond memories they have of it? What’s a bad memory? 

It was alright, didn’t think much of it as a kid but now later in life realized how bad it actually was. They had all their basic needs met, education and tutoring, some training with weapons as well, but no parental guidance, no real friends, all the attention was always on their sister. The happiest they were as a kid was with Hyacinth

Nope, both her moms were addicts, dropped out of school, received zero help or support, basically looked after her parents when they were supposed to look after her, got into lot of trouble very early on

4. What is their relationship with their parents? What’s a good and bad memory with them? Did they know both parents?

Wants nothing to do with their parents, and their parents only formally acknowledge them as their kid. Their parents used to take out their frustration on them or just leave them alone completely

She’s gone no contact with them, and believes they’re dead already. Very strained back when she was still living with them, and there were some good moments, like when they would get sober for her birthday, bring some gifts for her to try and make amends etc

5. Do they have any siblings? What’s their names? What is their relationship with them? Has their relationship changed since they were kids to adults? 

Has twin sister Hyacinth, she was their world when growing up, but later as the two of them went their separate ways she wasn’t as ready to defend them like she used to. Now they’re still writing each other but Hibiscus isn’t too eager to visit

Only child

6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate? 

Excellent at school, or the noble tutor scholar equivalent, very intelligent. And bc they didnt have friends and their parents didn’t let them outside the manor grounds often they had nothing else to do. Enjoyed history the most. Wasn’t a fan of math

Did pretty well all things considered, excelled at math, chemistry and physics, as well as languages. Wasn’t too keen on history, biology or other realities that required a lot of reading. Did end up dropping out of higher education before getting a bachelors degree in anything.

7. Did they have lots of friends as a child? Did they keep any of their childhood friends into adulthood? 

Basically considered Hyacinths friends their friends as well but the feeling wasn’t mutual

Just a couple of kids in equally bad situations, they just stuck together, spent all their free time away from home loitering and being delinquents

8. Did they have pets as a child? Do they have pets as an adult? Do they like animals? 

The Baskervilles had some fancy birds in the manor grounds, as a well as couple dogs for show and hunting. Hibiscus adored them. As an adult and due to their lifestyle getting a pet is a bit of a bad idea

Didn’t have pets as a kid. As a an adult she got into snakes, getting a more stable position in the gang allowed her to start keeping one, which is now the black mamba she adores and scares people with

9. Do animals like them? Do they get on well with animals? 

They’re ok with animals and animals get along with them

The animals can sense her rancid vibes from miles away. Snakes dont care luckily

10. Do they like children? Do children like them? Do they have or want any children? What would they be like as a parent? Or as a godparent/babysitter/ect?

They like kids and kids like them. Will get a kid with Pestle to commit to the bit fully. Will be the fun parent, the parent who straps the bebe on and starts doing insane parkour.

Not a fan of kids, and kids are afraid of her. Got her uterus yoinked as soon as she had the funds to get it done

20. Do they like musicals? Music in general? What do they do when they’re favourite song comes? 

They enjoy theater a lot, musicals included, especially musicals. Isn’t too passionate about music in general but will enjoy a diddy played in a tavern 

Music in the background is fine, the club being so noisy kinda turns her off from listening to music on her free time, but when she does its lofi beats to run a criminal empire to

21. Do they have a temper? Are they patient? What are they like when they do lose their temper? 

Not really? They don’t really explode. Patience is not a thing Hibiscus is good at either, they want to do something they’ll do. When dealing with people (like this question probably assumes) they have a limit on how much bs they’re willing to put up

Ipes is more patient, analyzing where the situation is going and acting/talking accordingly. When she start spiraling she’ll begin to lose her temper and lash out and that ultimately will be her downfall

22. What are their favourite insults to use? What do they insult people for? Or do they prefer to bitch behind someone’s back? 

Dickhead, just straight to their face, and then bitch about them later behind their back

Doesn’t really insult people, she just berates them and makes them feel bad in other ways, will curse out people when talking about them behind their backs too

23. Do they have a good memory? Short term or long term? Are they good with names? Or faces? 

Decent, nothing special but not the worst either, very bad at remembering names though

She has a very good memory, her brain is like a file cabinet

24. What is their sleeping pattern like? Do they snore? What do they like to sleep on? A soft or hard mattress? 

They try to keep it regular, though often night sneaking is required in which case they just nap more to  compensate. A soft bed type of lad, likes to get super comfortable. Can sleep pretty much anywhere though

Sleeps through the day mostly and stays up all night. Has relatively firm mattress.

25. What do they find funny? Do they have a good sense of humour? Are they funny themselves? 

They’ll squeeze out humor out of anything whenever they can, just overall wants to be jolly and lighthearted and find humor in bad situations

Tbh she’s lost her sense of humor a long time ago, nothing to laugh about in this life

26. How do they act when they’re happy? Do they sing? Dance? Hum? Or do they hide their emotions? 

Their emotions are always on the show, no use hiding them, so when they’re happy their step is light and might do a little skip and hop too

When she’s happy she becomes more relaxed and mellow

27. What makes them sad? Do they cry regularly? Do they cry openly or hide it? What are they like they are sad? 

A lot of things make them sad, and once again they’re not hiding any of it, in childhood they had enough of hiding their emotions, they will hide themselves however, shut themselves into a room to cry it out

She’s just permanently neutral i think, can’t really squeeze any tears out of her. When she’s sad she just shuts down and locks herself in her room

28. What is their biggest fear? What in general scares them? How do they act when they’re scared? 

Not being enough, not being able to do anything. They’ve faced some Horrors on their journey but interpersonal situations are the worst

She fears a lot of things, loss of control being the main one, physical assault and getting injured a more concrete one

29. What do they do when they find out someone else’s fear? Do they tease them? Or get very over protective? 

Try to tease first to maybe get them to relax about it, but if the vibe is off they’ll take it seriously

She’ll use it against them. Unless its Kenzo, in which case she feels protective, for some unknown unholy reason

30. Do they exercise? Regularly? Or only when forced? What do they act like pre-work out and post-work out?

Pretty often, gotta keep in battle and sneaking shape when not on the road. When out and about they dont feel the need to take extra time to work out

She would do something like pilates and yoga, some low-impact exercise like 15 minutes a day

[ceasarslegion]

Oh boy, here we go!

So to summarize what im about to get into detail about... I don't think Matt Stone and Trey Parker are the wholly problematically evil creators that tumblr makes them out to be, simply because I actually grew up watching their work and the accusations I see, while they have truth to them, leave out some very important details.

Before I get a mob at my doorstep accusing me, a ginger bisexual trans ethnic jew who grew up in the middle east, of being bigoted towards every aspect of my identity that South Park parodies, let me explain my experience.

Growing up, I was a latchkey kid. My mom worked full time while my dad went to uni during the day and worked nights. My dad would drop me off at school in the mornings on his way to campus, I would take the bus home, and I'd be left to my own devices until mom came home around 6 or 7pm. There'd be snacks and a meal in the fridge for me to heat up and a note about making sure I called mom or dad when I got home, fed and watered and walked the dog, and did my homework before I went outside to play. This upbringing was likely a huge part of why I'm so independent today and why I developed a lot of independent thought. Financial demands meant that I was left alone a hell of a lot, and thus I spent a lot of time watching my very young parents' dvd collection on the ps2 in the den while I kicked my feet and ate my snacks.

And my dad had a lot of dvd box sets of adult cartoons and sitcoms. Futurama was my favourite and my first choice every time, but he also had the first few seasons of South Park nestled among The Simpsons and Full House.

The thing these arguments about media fail to realize is that you can not reduce individuals, even children, to generalized judgements about what they can handle. My parents knew I was very capable of taking care of myself (hence why this system worked for me, but wouldnt work for a lot of other kids), and so they were pretty hands-off with media. They only required two things from me: that I understood that certain things were made for adults, and that I could comprehend what I was seeing on screen. As long as those two things were met, they told me I could go nuts. So of course I watched the South Park dvds.

The early work of Matt and Trey, while always offensive, did not have the purposeful punching down that it seems to have now. While it didnt always meet its mark, it was very obviously supposed to be a satire that wasnt meant to be taken literally. The jew jokes, even to my child eyes, were quite clearly supposed to be from a place of a jewish creator self-deprecating himself rather than an antisemite campaigning for eradication. The gay jokes felt tongue-in-cheek, the fact that the one black student was named Token was pretty glaringly making fun of racist casting in the film industry, and I can't actually remember any trans jokes they made.

I think Team America was the turning point with when Matt and Trey started becoming the things they once made their careers on satirizing, personally. That movie tows a strange line between satire and what comes off as genuine creator belief in the offensive humor, although I can't pick their brains and find out for sure. All I know is what I have access to, which is the trajectory of their careers and how their work content lines up with it in real time.

At this point in their careers, the Book of Mormon musical was a smashing success and South Park was one of the shows that carried networks like Adult Swim. It even got a movie that was, funny enough, satirizing parents who blamed them for their kids becoming shitheads after said parents were the ones who let them watch a show that was for adults. The whole message was "don't show this adult cartoon to your kids if they cant handle adult themes without acting like douche bags. It is not our fault if you can't read tv ratings." They weren't small time jewish creators with off-colour humor anymore, they were now in the tv industry elite with an audience that was only growing.

And said audience wasn't exactly the most discerning bunch with what came to satire vs genuine belief. But they were the loyal ones, they made them their money, so it's just good business to pander to them over their original show model.

I tried to watch more recent seasons of South Park, I really did, but it was like watching a nose dive from "haha these bigoted beliefs are fucking stupid, let's show them being said by snotty brats to show how stupid they are" to "haha isnt the culture war funny" with no actual grounding stance to signal it as a satire anymore. I couldn't get through 2 episodes as an adult in college when I used to be able to crush 10 in one sitting as a kid watching it over my fruit snacks in the den because it was legitimately more satirical when i was in elementary school to my child brain than it was when i was an adult with 2 jobs and a full courseload IN political science.

But the takes I see here about Matt and Trey, while I understand where they're coming from, just aren't accurate to what the rise and fall of their work actually was. And I don't think their early work deserves to be looped in with the lowest common culture war denominator sludge that they're vomiting out now. I think if you are going to criticize someone, including and especially those who merit that criticism, it needs to be accurate to what that work actually looks like. To say that every episode of South Park ever aired was created equal just isnt true. I saw that myself, I even STILL have the movie on dvd because i still watch it sometimes as its from the era of when it was actually funny and actually satirical

And no, I'm not defending them. I'm doing the opposite of that. I'm saying that if you're going to voice that legitimate criticism, it needs to be true or im sorry that this will sound harsh but you look like the very same stereotype of the blue hair and pronouns liberal that they make fun of in their chronically centrist work now

Would anyone like what might be my most unpopular media opinion before i just say it and lose 200 followers

[dancefloors]

where's the harry's house unhinged ranking maam

alright this is longer than the other two combined but it's not my fault he is a madman. here we go

Matilda: was this necessary. was this necessary. Hey quick question was this necessary. I think we all know why this is number one and it's especially sickening that this ONE SINGULAR TIME in his career he chose not to be even a little vague in his lyrics, not one word minced. like did he really need to say "your family never showed you love" with his chest like that :/. second of all, writing a song about found family and DIY-ing clothes and growing up isolated and naming it after Matilda knowing his whole fanbase is made up of sentimental homosexuals and repressed eldest sisters WAS targetted behaviour. in second person too. he really said "YOU are gay and alone.. but it is okay ❤️".

Keep Driving: the already infamous choking/cocaine line, the science, the edibles, the bad-driving metaphor etc etc yes, ALL psychotic. but probably the most unhinged unnecessary part is the sickly sweet slap in the face that is "hashbrown, egg yolk, I will always love you" ambushing me with no forewarning. makes me want to jackhammer my head into the nearest wall until my skull is pulverised. why would you put a line like that in a song that is also about sideboob and then have the audacity to tell ME to "just act normal"?? you are preaching from hell.

Music for a Sushi Restaurant: he put his brain in a blender and then served it up. just absolutely saying whatever the fuck, not even trying to make sense, 50 different things going on at all times. like it's him in the studio reading a takeout menu over that Glee Club ba ba-ba acapella harmony, making a british pun about cocaine, hitting dog frequencies with those falsettos, pondering society if we could eat stars, and then proudly declaring he's not going to go broke as if anyone even asked. like okay..... music for a psych ward.

Little Freak: yeah he clearly walked into the studio dick first with this one but pensively somehow. talking about wet dreams but i feel like witnessing a slam poetry reading. philosophical horniness. Little Nietzsche.

Boyfriends: he had a simon and garfunkel beat, gay misandry in his heart, and a dream. doubly psychotic that this was conceived on the same day as the Fuck Straight People anthem that is Lights Up... he said heterosexuality it ain't me 🤣🙏 but you gay people are on thin ice too. (also let's not think too hard about "I'm not ever going back" / "you fool, you're back at it again"...... his mind is a saw trap)

Love of My Life: I do actually subscribe to the idea that this song is about England and not a person bc it makes it so funny. "you were the love of my life, will it ever be the same, I wish I knew you better"... brother it is a country. England unfortunately still exists. where is it going to go. you are so dramatic.

Cinema: never witnessed a more aquarian move than being in an intimate relationship with someone, sleeping in the same bed, going on late night drives, dancing, spending all your time with them and then after all that being like do you like me tho do you think im cool do you think im chill? then he spends the last 1 minute making a sex pun about popcorn.

As It Was: are we institutionalising ourselves or shaking ass like what is the energy here. why does this song about clinical depression make me want to do 15 consecutive cartwheels

Satellite: "am I bothering you do you wanna talk" to "I don't want to talk to you" within 60 seconds. if i said i want to talk then i didnt bc i dont. no i didnt <3

Daydreaming: yeah yeah a song about horny dreams what's new. the most insane part of it though is definitely the bass line like.... that is the bass line written by a man taken HOSTAGE. a man FIGHTING for his LIFE. convinced kid harpoon was in that studio with a gun to Harry's head, finger on the trigger and all. Like everytime I listen to this song I imagine him getting waterboarded because there's no other explanation.

Daylight: the insanity of sandwiching a song about riding bikes and sitting on roofs and finding life and bluebirds and honey between one about crippling loneliness and one about dangling wet dreams. be serious for once in your life harry.

Late Night Talking: funky little anthem but what do you mean "late night talking"? we all know ur geriatric ass is all tucked in by 9PM on the dot, Scrooge nightcap on and all. stayed up til 9:30 and wrote a whole song about it.

Grapejuice: mostly just toothache-inducingly sweet but sidenote: i truly despise being provided insight into his food/wine taste bc its always horrific and caucasian. genuinely enjoying red wine..? please stop. imagine you go over to this man's house and he's serving pile of boiled peas with some nasty ass shiraz to wash it down lord have mercy

(and hs1 and fine line ranked for ur displeasure)

[genshin-impact-writings]

hi there! may i request small frappé with pumpkin spice and whipped cream? childe x reader ty! this is my first time requesting so i hope i didnt do this wrong!!

Heya, dear anon! Thank you so much for your request, it was perfect and i had a lot of fun writing this. So, here's your drink: A small frappé with pumpkin spice and whipped cream on top. Hope you enjoy! <3 (Reblogs are very much appreciated.)

Prompts: fluff, fake dating, “You’re not wearing that, are you?” + “I don’t think I can do this anymore.” (400 followers event: JJ's coffee shop)

Be mine – Tartaglia x gn!reader (fake dating!AU, fluff)

“You’re not wearing that, are you?”

With furrowed brows, you looked at Tartaglia. He was standing behind you, watching you as you turned in front of the mirror to get a better look at your outfit. “Why?” you asked, a hint of confusion echoing in your voice. “Is there something wrong? Is it too much?”

“No,” he replied, and a smile flashed over his face as he stepped closer and wrapped his arms around your waist from behind. Resting his chin on your shoulder, he added, “It makes you look even prettier than you already are, to be honest. Everyone’s going to stare at you.” He nuzzled your cheek. “And I’m not sure if I like that thought.”

You felt your face growing hot at his words and tried to wriggle out of his hug. “Stop that,” you said with a sheepish grin. “No one’s here, there’s no need to act like we’re a couple.”

Tartaglia hummed in response and took a step back after releasing you from his hug, although he couldn’t deny that your words hurt him more than he liked to admit. He knew that you were right – the two of you weren’t really dating, after all. It was just a show you put on to stop your friends from constantly pestering you to finally find yourself a boyfriend. When you had asked him to pretend to be in a relationship with you for a while, Tartaglia hadn’t hesitated to help you. Up to this day, he hadn’t regretted it – well, a bit, maybe.

At first, it had been nothing more than a game and a secret the two of you shared – something that never failed to make you laugh when your friends weren’t around. But as the weeks passed, things had… changed. At least for him.

He had no idea how you felt about the whole situation, though. If you still thought about him as a friend or if his constant flirting did have some kind of effect on you… if you maybe had developed real, genuine feelings for him too. It was foolish, he knew that, but he couldn’t help but hold on to that thought whenever he saw you.

You watched him in the mirror, the way he stared into the distance absent-mindedly, his pretty blue eyes filled with something you couldn’t quite put your finger on. He often had that look on his face when he thought you weren’t noticing it but whenever you brought the topic up, he always told you that you were imagining things before he quickly changed the subject.

That didn’t stop you from asking, though. You turned around to face him, your left arm slightly outstretched, almost as if your body couldn’t decide if you wanted to reach out for him or not. “Hey,” you said, your voice a lot softer than you initially intended. “What’s wrong?”

It was fascinating to see how his facial expression changed almost immediately, how he put on a smile that could have fooled anyone but you. “I was just thinking that you’re right,” he replied and shrugged. “About us, I mean. We’re not a couple when your friends aren’t around, and I’m sorry if my actions made you feel uncomfortable.”

You let out a surprised laugh. “What made you think I was uncomfortable? I just – I don’t know, I guess I wanted to say that there’s no need to pretend anything when we’re alone. It’s not necessary and I don’t want to bother you. Um…�� You shook your head, annoyed by your own stammering. “You’re not making me uncomfortable. That’s what I was trying to say.”

You watched as his smile slowly transformed into a more honest one, and suddenly, there was this warm feeling welling up inside you again. It had happened a few times already, mostly when he looked at you like you were the most precious thing he had ever seen or when he hugged you like he had done earlier but you had never bothered yourself with thinking about it. After all, he only acted like that because you had an agreement with each other, not because he actually cared about you… at least not in that way.

And it was fine, although you couldn’t deny that a part of you had always wondered what it would be like to be in a real relationship with him. He could be reckless and even kind of belligerent sometimes, yes, but when he was with you, he seemed to be a completely different man – caring and considerate, always trying his best to make you smile when you were upset or sad. He was your best friend, the one you could always rely on, no matter what happened.

And sometimes, just like in this moment, he was the one who made your heart skip a beat without even knowing it.

“We should go,” you said, shaking your head once again to get rid of the confusing thoughts that had come to your mind. “The others are probably already waiting for us.”

*

On your way back home, you couldn’t stop thinking about something your best friend had said to you. Sometimes, you couldn’t help but wonder if they secretly knew that your relationship with Tartaglia wasn’t real but since you didn’t want to risk anything, you had decided to let sleeping dogs lie a while ago. Maybe they didn’t know it, anyway but something about the way they looked at you when they told you how happy you could be to have someone like him in your life, had suggested that they were well aware of your fake dating. “If you weren’t so cute together, I would be so jealous, really,” they had added with a grin, darting a glance at Tartaglia who had been joking around with one of your other friends at this point. “He’s awesome, (Y/N). Don’t mess this up, okay?”

The words were still echoing in your mind. How could you mess it up if everything wasn’t even real? Of course you knew what they were trying to say but at some point, you would have no other choice than messing everything up because you either had to tell your friends toe truth or act like you and Tartaglia had broken up. You couldn’t force him to play along forever, after all.

Sooner or later, he would find someone and fall in love for real, and then you would have to let him go, no matter how awful it felt to imagine him being with someone else. The thought hurt – and at the same time, it made you absolutely furious.

You stopped in your tracks, confused by the sudden anger that welled up inside of you when you thought about Tartaglia’s hypothetical future partner. Just because he would start to date someone, you definitely weren’t going to lose him; he would still be your friend. The only thing that would change was the fact that he would no longer act like he was head over heels in love with you.

And that was the moment it finally hit you.

The problem wasn’t that you were afraid of losing your friend. The problem was that you didn’t want him to fall in love with someone else – you wanted him to love you, actually love you, not just pretending like he had done for the past couple of weeks.

It was absolutely crazy, you knew that. He had agreed to fool your friends with you for a while because he thought it sounded like fun but actually developing feelings for each other hadn’t been a part of the deal. It had been completely out of the question, even.

Heck, why did everything have to become so complicated all of a sudden? Why did you have to fall for him? Everything he did, every hug, every kiss… all of that was part of your charade. He didn’t do it because he had romantic feelings for you.

Right?

You couldn’t help but remember the scene from earlier when he had hugged you in front of the mirror, implying that he’d be jealous if someone else would start to admire you. There had been no one around to see; he didn’t have to talk to you like that – and still, he had done it. And he had hugged you in a way that still made your heart beat faster.

Damn it. You needed to talk to him.

You needed to talk to him right now.

You turned around and rushed back to the restaurant where you had parted ways maybe fifteen minutes ago. He wasn’t there anymore but you knew that he sometimes went for a walk near the docks because he liked to listen to the sound of the waves, so you decided to look for him there.

It wasn’t too hard to find him – and as he spotted you approaching him through the crowd, a soft smile flashed over his face. “Did you miss me already?” he asked in a teasing tone that usually would have caused you to roll your eyes. But right now, it just made you feel more insecure.

“I need to talk to you,” you said. Admittedly, it wasn’t the smoothest conversation starter but you were way too nervous to bother yourself with being particularly eloquent in that moment. “About us.”

He raised his eyebrows. “About us?”

“About the whole situation,” you explained. “The relationship thing we have going on. I – I don’t think I can do this anymore. It just… it just feels wrong to pretend like we are dating when we’re not. I don’t know why I came up with that idea in the first place, it’s so stupid and I’m sorry for dragging you into this and-“

“Whoa, slow down, (Y/N),” Tartaglia interrupted you and furrowed his brows. “What are you talking about? I told you many times that I don’t mind helping you. I know your friends, I realize that they can be quite annoying when it comes to… well, your love life. You’re not taking advantage of me if that’s what you’re concerned about.”

You buried your face in your hands for a few seconds and let out a frustrated groan. “That’s not the reason I want to end this, Tartaglia,” you said. “I want to end it because it just feels wrong. We don’t love each other – we shouldn’t pretend that we do. It’s… it’s just not right.”

“Who says I don’t love you?”

You had expected every answer from him but not something like this. With wide eyes, you stared at him, searching his face for a sign that he was joking, that he was trying to fluster you like he already did a million times but his expression was unusually serious. “What?”

“Who says I don’t love you?” he repeated patiently. “You said it’s not right to pretend that we love each other. But the truth is that I’m not pretending anymore. So, it’s not wrong, is it?”

You couldn’t reply. Your thoughts were racing as your brain tried to comprehend what he had just told you but you felt like you weren’t able to think straight at all. Not when all you could think about was that he loved you.

Tartaglia stepped closer, gently cupping your face with his hands. “I love you,” he said, the tone of his voice so earnest that it send a shiver down your spine. “And I think that you may love me too, so if that’s the case could you please say something? Or – I don’t know, blink twice, maybe?”

“Shut up,” you said, finally snapping out of your state of shock. “Shut up and kiss me.”

Taglist: @blissmal, @aimicoos

[islesnucks]

LAST NIGHT I TOLD YOU I LOVED YOU - NOLAN PATRICK X READER

this started as a tyler seguin fic, was almost a brock boeser one for a second and turned out to be about Nolan lol

this was not proofread so yeah keep that in mind as you read it 

Word Count: 2k

Warning: mention of alcohol (?)

Smmary: the morning after you drunkenly confessed your feelings to Nolan - slightly inspired by the song Last Night by Lucy Spraggan

Masterlist

Add yourself to the taglist!

-

Last night I told you I loved you

Woke up blamed it on the Vodka

I genuinely thought I was dyin'

And I could see that smile you were hiding

-

You woke up and the first thing you felt was pain. There was a banging in your head and your stomach felt sick. Memories from last night were blurry, there surely was alcohol involved. The last thing you remembered was walking into the bar with Nolan and TK by your side, then there was vodka involved. Or was it tequila? Maybe even both?

Feeling like the slightest move would make you throw up, you decided to snuggle further into the sheets trying to go back to sleep, hoping a couple more hours of sleep would make you feel better. That’s when you heard barks coming from outside the room, making your head pound. Then your eyes went wide when it hit you: you don’t own any dogs.

Looking around you confirmed this indeed wasn’t your bedroom, it was Nolan’s. The curtains were shut so the room was dark and you couldn’t see much, but you were able to make out your dress from last night folded on top of the armchair beside the bed.

You looked down and realized you indeed weren’t using your clothes, instead you had one of his old shirts on. Then you noticed your underwear was still on, a good sign you thought. But still you couldn’t remember anything from last night and that terrified you.

You weren't scared of what you could have done, you knew having the boys by your side ensure you nothing bad would happen. So you weren't scared that you had somehow ended up drunkenly dancing on top of  a table or making out with a complete stranger. No, the problem was that alcohol always loosened your tongue. What you were scared of was having confessed something you had worked so hard on holding in.

Gathering a little courage and still feeling like you may throw up any second, you got out of bed and made your way out of the room. The clacking of a pan and smell coming from the kitchen let you know Nolan was probably there cooking some breakfast or maybe lunch, you didn’t know what time it was. Taking one last deep breath, trying to calm your nerves, you made your way down the hall to the kitchen.

He was with his back to you, too busy stirring something on a pan to realize you had entered the room. That’s when his dogs approached you excited to see you, making him turn around to find you still half asleep, hair in a messy bun, some rests of makeup from last night on your face, dressed in his shirt that were long enough to cover everything. You were sure you looked horrible but he found it cute, the smile that formed on his face showed it.

“Hey, you’re alive.” He turned off the stove and proceeded to place what turned out to be scrambled eggs on two plates.

“I feel like shit.” You took a seat on one of the barstools by the kitchen island.

“Sorry, did the bark wake you? I was keeping them in the living room so they wouldn’t bother you but Charlie sneaked out.” he said, giving the dog a stern look, but Charlie was too distracted enjoying as you petted him to notice.

“No don’t worry I was already awake, agonizing in bed, but awake.”

He placed the plate with everything he had cooked and a cup of coffee in front of you and you thanked him as he took a seat next to you. He was quiet per usual, but the Nolan you knew would have thrown some snarky remark about how much of a lightweight you are and he’s never going out with you again. That concerned you a bit. However he seemed normal, no awkward looks or anything that made you think you had messed up in any way last night.

“Do you remember anything from last night?” he suddenly said bringing you back to reality. There it was, something did happen. You could feel your heart in your throat, but you tried to play it cool.

“No… Wait we didn’t-”

“No!” he was quick to cut you off, slightly offended that you thought that could’ve happened. “You were wasted Y/N, I’d never take advantage like that.” He then realized he admitted nothing happened because you were drunk, not because he didn’t want it to happen; but you were too busy panicking to realize.

“I know, I know. It’s just that I woke up in your bed, with your clothes on.” you tried to explain.

“We ubered back here, you were asleep the whole ride, I helped you change your clothes and gave you my bed. I slept on the couch.” Relief washed over your body, deep down you knew nothing like that could have happened, but hearing it made you feel better, like a huge weight was being taken off your shoulders.

“Thank you Nols, you didn’t have to.”

“Leaving you alone in your apartment in the state you were in felt wrong.”

“Thanks.”

“I’m glad to know I didn’t do anything too stupid at the club.” you said, letting out a deep breath you didn’t even notice you had been holding on to.

“Well you didn’t do anything stupid at the club...” He didn't finish but that was enough to make you choke on the coffee you had been drinking.

“Shit what did I do?”

“Nothing, nothing. Don’t worry.” He brushed it off as he stood with his empty plate in hand and walked over to the sink.

“Nolan …” you questioned him, but he still wouldn’t look at you. Yet you could see the smile he was trying to hide and that was all the confirmation you needed. Something definitely happened. You got off your seat and made your way around the kitchen island.

“Nolan James Patrick. What did I do?” Your stern tone made him finally turn around with a look on his face you couldn’t quite explain, which only made your nerves grow.

“You said something.” 

“Shit.”

“You really don't remember?” He walked till he was standing next to you. “We were here, I had already helped you change, you were in bed ...” he started to explain, hoping it would refresh your memories because he didn’t have it in him to actually tell you what you had said.

And just like that the memory from last night hit you.

~

“This sucks.” you said letting yourself fall on the bed, not even trying to position yourself correctly.

“Well you should’ve stopped after the third shot like I told you.” Nolan was too busy folding your clothes to see the way you rolled your eyes.

“Not that. This. You are being so nice with me and it sucks.”

“You lost me there princess.” he said confused, brows narrowing but with a playful smile still on his face, the way you rambled incongruently was too cute for him not to.

“Because I’m just going to fall harder for you and I shouldn’t because we’re friends Patty. I can’t be in love with my friend.” you let out matter-of-factly, clearly all products of the alcohol that was still running through your veins.

He could not believe what he was hearing. His heart stopped at your words, but he tried to convince himself he had heard it wrong, God knows the many times he dreamed of you saying those words.

“It sucks that I’m in love with you.” you added and there was no denying it, he heard it clear this time.

“Y/N …” he started to say as he turned around but words died in his mouth when he realized you were already asleep.

~

“Shit!” you let out and your hands instantly went to cover your face. You had screwed it big time. Sure you could blame it on the alcohol but Nolan knew you, he knew you wouldn’t just invent something like that. And even if it worked, your friendship would never be like it was before.

“Just forget I ever said that, okay? I was drunk and I didnt know what I was saying. Fuck. I'm the worst'' you started to ramble as you walked around the kitchen, unable to keep still because of the anxious feeling deep in your chest. It felt like your world was spinning out of control and all you could think about was all you had lost the moment alcohol got the best of you and you confessed your feelings.

All of a sudden Nolan was standing in front of you, placing his hands on your sides to stop your pacing. You couldn’t look him in the face, knowing the moment he saw you he’d realized how much you meant everything you said last night.

“Hey calm down” He started caressing your arms gently up and down in a reassuring manner.

“I'm so sorry.” you said, tears threatening to fall down your face any moment. 

“Well I'm not.” he replied with a humorous tone that threw you off. You shoot your head up at him with a confused expression that only intensified once you realized he was smiling sheepishly at you.

“I’m actually really glad that happened because now I don’t have to worry about how you may react when I tell you how I feel about you.”

“I think the alcohol killed all my brain cells because I don’t understand a thing you're saying.”

Nolan rolled his eyes at your comment but couldn’t hide the smile on this face. His hands went to cup your face, pulling you closer to him as he wiped away gently with his thumb a few tears that you hadn’t been able to keep in.

“What I’m trying to say is: I love you too.” he said looking into your eyes tenderly.

“I swear if TK comes out of nowhere holding a camera or something I’m murdering both of you-”

“I’m not joking! I love you Y/N. I have for the longest time and I’m a little embarrassed it took you drunkenly confessing how you feel for me to have the balls to say it.” Nolan’s cheeks turned red and you had to bite your lip to not make a comment about it. His eyes full of adoration never left yours, making you feel the all too familiar butterflies, but this time it didn’t feel wrong. This time you didn’t have to hide it or push it away. No, because this time you knew he felt the same.

“Can I kiss you?” he asked softly and all you could do was nod. He started to lean in, heart beating fast in his chest just like yours. 

“Wait.” you said, stopping him when he was less than an inch away from connecting your lips. He pulled away to look down at you confused, hands still resting against your cheeks. “I haven't washed my teeth.” He let out a chuckle.

“I couldn't care less.” he said, leaning down to finally kiss you.

It started sweet and gently, neither of you could believe it was happening, too scared any second you’d wake up and realize it was all a dream. That was until your hands met on the back of his neck, tangling your fingers in his hair and bringing him closer, deepening the kiss. His hands left your face and moved down your back, pressing you against him as much as possible, clutching to you in any way possible. The kiss intensified with the second and you could not stop, you had been craving each other for so long it felt almost intoxicating to finally know what the other’s lips felt like.

-

thank you for reading, hope you liked it! likes and reblogs are always appreciated!

taglist: @glassdanse @2manytabsopen @barbienoturbby @petey-patty @chieflawyerpastatoad @iwantahockeyhimbo @fallinallincurls @jamiedrysdales @jordiee95

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[nah-she-didnt]

JILY AUGUST CHALLENGE | @nah-she-didnt vs @floreatcastellumposts

summer + ok so I almost drowned in the sea whilst body boarding and yeah you saved me but hEY don’t laugh

Read here or on AO3

Lily Of The Sea

Absolutely mental. He must have been absolutely mental to agree to any part of this.

First, there was the fact that he had chosen to spend a week in Wales with Remus when he should have been training for football season. That decision alone would surely ruin his life when he showed up back at school completely out of shape and got booted from the team.

Second, while James liked spending time with one of his best mates, Wales was bloody boring. Remus lived in a charming little cottage with his charming parents in a charming town that had absolutely nothing for a couple of teenage boys to do. There wasn’t even a damn cinema for them to waste away in for the summer. Really, how did people live like this? It was only out of sheer boredom that he’d agreed to spend the day at the beach in the first place. He usually made it a point to avoid the beach at all costs, but these were desperate times indeed.

Herein lay James’ third, and stupidest, decision. He must have been absolutely bloody mental to agree to wade out into the frigid mass of water before him that was the sea.

He turned to throw Remus another reproachful look. “Do I have to do this?”

“Yes!” Remus called over from his spot on the shore. He looked perfectly content, and dry, as he watched James’ slow march to his certain death. “Your fear of open water is, frankly, embarrassing. It’s high time you nipped it in the bud.”

James winced as the water lapped at his shins, blistering his sun-warmed skin with icy cold. “I thought you said you were right behind me?”

Remus grinned. “Oh, you don’t need me. You’re doing brilliantly.” James couldn’t help but notice the mirth in his friend’s voice.

It was true, he did harbor an embarrassing fear of the sea. And why shouldn’t he? The water was so dark you could barely see three inches below the surface. Surely some unknown horror came closer with every step.

James swore loudly. “Rem, I hate this. It’s bloody freezing!”

“It’s the Irish Sea, what do you expect?”

“Damn the Irish then!”

“Mate, you’re English, I don’t think you’re allowed to say that.”

And so, James plowed onward, cursing Remus under his breath. The water was now up to his knees. He could feel the hair on his legs standing at attention as goosebumps emerged from his skin.

However, as he became more and more submerged, something in James began to change. The water was so cold it nearly took his breath away but it also filled him with a new resolve. It wasn’t so bad, really. He could do this.

With that thought, he plunged forward, brought his hands together above his head, and dove straight into an oncoming wave.

He hadn’t been prepared for how quiet underwater was. He was vaguely aware of the wave crashing above his head, but the force of it merely rocked him backward gently. He tried his best to open his eyes but the saltwater stung so fiercely that he shut them tight again. After a few moments of floating beneath the waves, James found his feet below him again and pushed up toward the surface.

He heard Remus’ triumphant whoop as his head broke the surface. He straightened up, embarrassed to find that the water was only about three feet deep, and shook his hair out of his eyes like a dog. “There,” he shouted in Remus’ direction, “I’ve done it. Now, will you come out here with me, please? I don’t need a bloody babysitter.”

Remus sighed loudly. “Yeah alright. Plus, if you drown, I’m sure you’d rather be saved by a fit lifeguard than by me.”

“Too true.”

They spent the next half hour lounging in the water. It was still freezing cold, but James found that it did not bother him so much now. The sun, in a rare moment of favor, had decided to shine bright and warm on the beach today. Remus showed James how to lie back and float so that his top half could be drenched in warmth while his back half rocked with the waves. The effect was actually quite lovely. Perhaps he wasn’t so mental after all.

It was at this very moment that he heard the muffled sound of a whistle.

“Wha-?” James said stupidly as he sat up from his float, pulling his head and ears out of the water so that he could hear properly, “what was that? Remus?”

But Remus was gone. It was only then that James realized how far he had floated from the safety of the beach. He was at least twenty yards away from the shore now, and Remus was not only a few feet away as he previously thought. James whipped his head around frantically. “Remus!”

“Riptide!” Remus’ voice called from somewhere behind him. He turned to see his friend scrambling up the beach through the surf. “Swim parallel to the beach! Now!”

Shit.

This was why he avoided the ocean. What the hell was a riptide? It certainly didn’t sound good.

James flapped his arms wildly as he swam, trying his best to stay parallel to the shore. Now he could feel the pull of the water on his body, coaxing him further and further out into the vast sea. He had to keep swimming. He had to, otherwise how on earth would he be able to murder Remus?

“You’re a bloody bastard, you know that?” James screamed to his friend as he fought against the sea, “You made me come out here!” He was closer to the shore now, almost at the wave breakpoint, only ten yards from where Remus stood.

“I know, I know, keep going!” Remus called, “You’re almost there.”

James fought with all his might to keep swimming. He really was out of shape after all, but he forced the thought from his mind as he struggled. Nearly there.

Finally, he made it back to the shallows. He stood with a great effort and began to stagger drunkenly toward Remus. “I can’t believe you left me out there alone! You smug toss-”

WHAM.

The wave hit James squarely in the back, knocking him hard into the rough, rocky beach.

His cheek caught the edge of a sharp rock. He felt his skin rip and sting fiercely, but he had bigger problems before him. The strength of the retreating wave was dragging him, helplessly, back into the deep. He tried to stand but he had no idea which way was up. The fall had knocked the wind out of him, and for a moment he truly wondered if he was about to drown.

Then, suddenly, there was warmth. Hands - yes, small, warm hands - wrapped protectively around his chest. Then there were arms, a torso pressed against his back. The last thing he felt before everything went dark was the mysterious body pulling him up, up, up.

...

“Is he dead?”

“Don’t be daft.”

“I’m not. Look at him. He looks dead.”

“He’s not dead, you idiot. He’s breathing just fine. What did you leave him out there for? He can barely swim.”

“We were floating! I didn’t know how far he’d drifted.”

The first thing James noticed was the warmth. His whole body tingled with a warm glow in sharp contrast to the freezing water. The water. Where was the water?

James snapped his eyes open. Two blurry faces swam above him. Remus, who looked concerned, but James only had eyes for the other face that hovered above him. A girl’s face. A very pretty girl’s face.

James blinked. “Am I dead?”

“Apparently not,” Remus sighed, “Christ, James, you really know how to make a scene.”

James barely heard this comment. The girl continued to stare at him, her brow furrowed. She didn’t look all that excited to find that he was alive. The more she looked at him, the more James felt that he’d seen this girl somewhere before.

“Who are you?” He whispered up to her. He hadn’t meant to say it, but he still wasn’t sure that she was not a dream.

“Hold still.” She spoke with a practiced, authoritative voice as she turned away from him to rummage through a red bag at her side. She withdrew a white package that she tore open with her teeth, pulled out a wet cloth, and brought it to his face.

James gasped as the cut on his cheek seared with pain. “Ouch! Blimey, what is that?”

“Rubbing alcohol,” she said, again with that focused voice, “don’t want it getting infected. What month is it?”

“Uh-”

“Evans, let him rest,” Remus protested, “he’s just had a shock.”

The girl shook her head. “We’ve got to make sure he’s not concussed. The month, Potter, what month is it?”

“August,” he said stupidly, “it’s August.”

“Who’s the Prime Minister?”

“Wilson.”

“What’s your name?”

“James Potter, what’s yours?”

This seemed to surprise her. The look of concentration slid from her face as she regarded him cautiously. “Lily.”

James squinted up at her with curiosity. “Of the valley?”

Get it together, you prat said a voice in his head, what a stupid thing to-

To his surprise, she smiled, and his heart did a backflip. “Yeah, sure.” Then she shook her head as if to rid herself of the distraction. “You’re going to be fine. Can you stand?”

James nodded and allowed Remus to pull him roughly to his feet. He steadied himself and reached instinctively up to his throbbing cheek. Lily smacked his hand away.

“What did I just say about infection? Blimey, maybe you are concussed.”

James wracked his throbbing brain. Everything was still a bit fuzzy, but now he was sure that he’d seen this girl before. “How did you know my name?”

Lily shot Remus a knowing look. “We go to school together. In Scotland. Remember?”

James felt his cheeks grow hot. That’s how he knew her, he’d seen Remus hanging around with a cute redhead before. “Ah - yeah, ‘course. Sorry I didn’t recognize you.”

She shrugged as she bent down to pack up her first aid kit. “Why would you? I’m not a footballer, not a posh kid, no big deal.”

James frowned. “I have plenty of friends who aren’t footballers or ‘posh kids,’” he said as he made quotation marks with his fingers. It was hard to keep the defensive edge out of his voice. She made him sound quite shallow. He motioned earnestly toward his friend. “Take Remus over here.”

“Thanks, mate.”

“Anytime.”

“Look,” Lily straightened back up, a look of annoyance on her face, “I’m sure you’ve got lots of friends and all, I just meant that we don’t exactly run in the same crowd.”

“But you know Remus. I heard you call him an idiot before.” James glanced at Remus, who looked like he wasn’t sure if he should stay for this tense conversation or disappear back into the safety of the water. “He only lets his very best friends call him that.”

Lily raised her eyebrows. “Really? His friends sound swell.”

Remus, still looking uncomfortable, finally cut in. “We knew each other before school,” he said quickly, looking from James to Lily, “from when we were kids.”

Lily nodded. She was starting to look downright testy now, but James could not for the life of him figure out why. “I used to spend the summers here with my aunt, and we met as kids. We used to go swimming on this beach all the time.” Her face softened at the memory. “It was lovely, actually. I used to love to swim. Haven’t had much time for it lately, until today.”

“Why not?” James persisted. It seemed that every question he asked did nothing more than to elevate her already defensive mood. He couldn’t help it, he had to keep talking to her. Had to keep making her cheeks flush like that.

Lily jerked her head back toward the lifeguard stand. “Don’t have much time, I spent most of my days working here ‘till sunset.”

“Ah,” James pulled what he hoped looked like a sympathetic face, “I see. Not a fun way to spend a holiday, I can imagine.”

Very unfortunately this seemed to be the worst thing he could have possibly said.

“Yeah, well. Some of us have to work to live.” She caught Remus’ eye and said with purpose, “Right. I’ll see you at school, Remus.” And with that, she turned and stalked away, leaving a very stunned James in her wake.

...

“You really cocked that up, huh?.”

“Cheers.”

“No, I mean it. Now she probably thinks you’re some stuck-up, rich brat. Really excellent job on that one.”

“I’m leaving.”

Remus laughed as he grabbed James’ elbow and pulled him back down to sit on the beach. “Christ, you’re touchy today. I’m sorry I almost let you drown, alright?”

James stared out over the glowing pink water. The sea was no less ominous even in the light of the early sunset. He could still feel the waves lapping at his shins, the force of the water smacking his bare back, the pull of the water as he struggled beneath the waves…

He shook his head at the memory. He was safe now, anyway. Thanks to Lily.

“Do you think I’m a stuck up, rich brat?” He refused to look at Remus as he asked the question. Instead, he picked up a large, rough stone and chucked it into the water.

Remus put a hand on his shoulder. “No James, I don’t think that. I think you’re a kind, loyal, and caring rich brat.”

James laughed. “Cheers, mate.”

“Anytime.”

“Give her some time and Lily will see it too. Speaking of...” Remus nodded in the direction behind James.

He turned to see Lily Evans walking toward them. She had pulled a pair of denim shorts over her red lifeguard’s bathing suit, slung a large blue tote bag over her shoulder, and held a half-melted vanilla ice cream cone in each hand.

“Hiya,” she offered as she took a seat next to Remus. James couldn’t tell if it was nerves or embarrassment that kept her from meeting his eyes. “These are for you two. I’m sorry I was a bit harsh before. I mean, you did almost drown, after all.”

James smiled as he accepted the ice cream. “Thanks. And thanks for this, too.”

Remus, however, waved her away as she offered him the cone. “No thanks, I don’t eat dairy.”

James frowned. “You love dairy. I’ve seen you put away an entire wheel of brie in under ten minutes.”

Remus shook his head and stood up, stretching. “No, really. Can’t stand the stuff. I better go find something else more digestible, leave you two alone to talk.”

Lily shot him a dirty look. Remus could not be more transparent if he tried. “I don’t think that’s necessary.”

But Remus was already walking back up the beach. “Too late, see you in a bit!”

“Rem!” James called to his friend, but he merely waved his arm wildly over his head in farewell.

They sat in silence for a few moments with only the crashing of the waves to break the tension. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat. James watched her fidget as he finished his cone. He wondered if it were uncomfortable to sit in those shorts with the back of her legs pressed against the small, jagged rocks that made up the beach. But he couldn’t let himself think for too long about her legs.

“So,” she broke the silence with what sounded like a great effort, “why can’t you swim?”

James sighed. “Oh, let’s just say it’s none of your concern,” he couldn’t bring himself to admit something so embarrassing, “why don’t you like posh kids?”

Lily, to his surprise, laughed. “None of your concern.”

“Are you sure about that? Since I’m apparently an insufferable rich kid maybe I can provide an inside scoop.”

Lily did not laugh this time. Instead, she stared out over the ocean, her vivid green eyes suddenly orange, reflecting the sunset’s light in the choppy water. “I’ve got a friend from school. Well, a friend from home, really. He’s like me, doesn’t have a lot of - of money, and stuff.” She was starting to shift even more now, clearly uncomfortable. James opened his mouth to stop her, but she plowed on. “He made some not-so-nice friends at school. They care a lot about status and all that, so he doesn’t want them to know anything about his home life. Doesn’t want them to know about me.”

James blinked. He’d known this girl only two hours, and he’d seen her in about fourteen different emotional states. He was quite sure he liked them all and wanted to see even more.

“That bullshit,” he said emphatically, “if he doesn’t value you then he’s an idiot. What a prat, giving up a true friend just to social climb.”

Lily smiled sadly. “You’re right, of course. Still hurts, but you’re right.” She shrugged, trying but failing to seem unphased. “Anyway, I think that’s why I was a bit, uh, prickly earlier. Forgive me?”

James just waved his hand dismissively. “Don’t worry about it. I’d be prickly too if it were me. He sounds like a disappointment.” He smiled at shyly, glad that they were approaching something like a friendly conversation, “plus, Remus assured me it wasn’t my finest moment either.”

She smiled again, and another shockwave shot through James’ body. “I forgive you. Friends?”

“Friends with the girl who saved my life? Absolutely.”

Silence fell between them again, but this time the air around them seemed more relaxed. Lily seemed to have found a comfortable position at last. She sat with her legs crossed and her hands placed on the ground behind her, propping her up toward the sea. She had her eyes closed and her head leaned back like she was savoring every roaring crash of waves or whiff of sea air.

“How can you not just love the sea,” she sighed, leaning her head back even further as she sunk into her surroundings, “I don’t know what I’d do without it.”

A few seconds passed before James realized that, at some point, he would have to stop staring at her to answer. “I guess it’s just not for me. You make it look pretty good, though. The sea, I mean.” he said quickly. Very smooth.

Lily, thankfully, ignored his comment. “Tell me the truth,” she turned her head to fix him with an intense look, “why don’t you like the ocean? I shared my trauma, now it’s your turn.”

James sighed. “Alright, I suppose I owe you. I’ve got to warn you, it’s pretty embarrassing.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Try me.”

James paused, trying to decide at the last moment if there was any possible way to tell her the truth and still be respectable in her eyes. There wasn’t.

Finally, he looked at her. “Have you ever seen a movie called ‘Jaws’?”

She pursed her lips, obviously trying not to smile. “Uh, yeah James. I think everyone’s seen that one.”

“Well,” he closed his eyes, preparing for her worst, “I had nightmares for weeks. I don’t know why, but it really got me. I could barely walk through campus puddles on a rainy day. Kept thinking some bloody shark or something was gonna come up, grab my ankle, and pull me in.” He opened one eye to cautiously scan her reaction. “Well? I’m mad, aren’t I?”

He was shocked to find that she was not laughing. Not much, anyway.

“It’s a completely rational fear,” she said thoughtfully, staring out across the blazing water. The sun was almost entirely set now, and soon they’d be engulfed in night. “It’s the fear of the unknown, innit? The anxiety that there’s something unseen lurking around the corner. It’s why people are afraid of spiders and centipedes. All the hidden things that might be there to hurt you. It’s why we wish we could see the future, to be sure that everything is going to turn out alright.”

He knew she was right. He followed her gaze out over the waves. It wasn’t the water that scared him. Wasn’t the searing cold, the slippery rocks underfoot as he plunged further and further into the deep. It was the unknowing, the darkness below him that scared him shitless. “Lily Evans, you are very wise.”

“I know.”

They were silent again, but not uncomfortably so. A strange sense of serenity washed over him. He wasn’t the only one who didn’t know what was out there.

“I could help, you know,” Lily said without looking at him. Instead, she seemed very interested in picking at a hangnail on her thumb.

James raised his eyebrows. “Help me? With swimming?”

“Swimming, the sea, all of it,” she chanced a glance up at him. She really did have the most staggering green eyes he’d ever seen. “I’m pretty good out there, and you clearly need help.”

James laughed. “That bad, am I?”

She grimaced. “Yes, that bad.”

He sighed and glanced back toward the sea. The sun had fully started to set now, and the pink and orange waves looked as menacing as ever. “I dunno… I’m not keen to repeat my near-drowning.”

“Oh, come on,” she winked at him, “a strapping lad like yourself should have no problem swimming in there.”

Strapping? She thought he was strapping?

James forced himself to focus. “The sun’s almost set. What if it gets too dark to see?”

“So?” She pushed herself to her feet, then offered his hand to pull him up. “You can���t see through the water anyway. What’s a little more unknown going to hurt?”

She helped pull him to his feet then began unbuttoning her shorts. James had the self-control to look away, though his hands shook just a bit as he removed his own t-shirt. Together, fully outfitted in their swimsuits, they marched toward the now-purple water.

“Don’t worry, we’ll go slow,” she murmured as they reached the shoreline, “I’ll hold your hand through the whole thing.”

James smirked, “Figuratively, of course.”

As if to spite him, she grabbed his hand and squeezed hard. With a jolt, James remembered that very hand on his chest not two hours ago, pulling him up and out of the same water they charged into now.

“The trick,” Lily said decisively as she stared out at the breaking waves, “is to choose the right moment. You have to wade in past the break line between waves. If you time it wrong, you get creamed. That was your problem last time.”

“Thanks for the reminder.”

“No problem. Ready?”

“Actually,” James hastened, suddenly feeling sick. He wanted to drop her hand and run back, but he found that his skin felt glued to hers. “I think not. Thanks for the offer, but I’m fine being a coward for the rest of my life.”

“Not a chance!” She cried, gesturing out over the water, “Look how far you’ve come! You can’t go back now. I’m not going to let you drown.”

James tried to shoot her with a mischievous grin, but he knew it more closely resembled a grimace. “Promise?”

“Promise. Go!”

And so, Lily pulling at his hand, they sprinted out into the shallows together. The remains of the previous wave rushed merrily alongside their feet and legs as they sprinted into the water. James did not stop running until he could feel the water at his collar bones, his feet skimming the bottom of the seafloor. He felt around with his toes. No sharks or monsters as far as he could feel.

“See?” Lily laughed and splashed him a bit with water, “it’s not so bad. Jump!”

He turned to look just in time. A wave was coming at them fast. He barely had time to push off the ground to sail over it. The two of them soared through the water, over the wave, and back down again as it crashed onto the shore behind them. He laughed with glee and disbelief. His lungs felt icy cold as he gulped down air to keep himself from panicking. It felt like flying, and James suspected he’d been meant to fly all his life. This was easy. This was wonderful.

Suddenly, a wave larger than the rest descended upon them. “Alright, James,” came Lily’s confident voice as she squeezed his hand tighter, “we have to go under this one, alright?”

“What?” He just managed to yell before she pulled him under the wave. Again, there was that eerie stillness, only this time James wasn’t alone in the silence. Lily’s hand was still warm and sure in his own.

And so they flew through the water, dodging and riding and floating over the waves. It was exhausting work which was not made any easier by their fits of laughter every time the other received a faceful of icy water. Finally, when the sky had turned a deep navy, they dragged each other back out of the surf and onto the shore.

Brilliantly illuminated stars scattered across the night sky as they threw themselves back down on the beach. Lily reached into her large tote and produced a beach towel that they shared, taking turns to wipe the saltwater from their eyes and faces. They had barely talked the whole time they swam, just laughed, and gasped for air.

“See?” Lily sighed as she flopped back onto the beach towel, “I told you it’s lovely out there.”

“I stand corrected,” James said as he laid down next to her. He could see her chest and stomach rise and fall with the effort of breathing. “You were an excellent teacher. You’re not Lily of the valley, you’re Lily of the sea.”

She looked at him with a look that he’d come to learn meant she was about to make fun of him. “Have you been thinking of that line the whole time?”

“No!” James said with mock indignation, “No, it’s true. You made me see what all the fuss is about. Thank you.”

Lily grinned at him. She turned onto her side to face him, her head resting on her outstretched arm. He could see her freckles even in the dim light from the stars. He hardly stopped to think before he leaned in, his mouth inches from her own. He could feel her breath, still coming in sharp gasps, against his lips. “Do you think it would be alright if I kissed you?”

She smiled, and his whole body lit on fire. “I’m going to insist that you do, Potter.”

Her lips tasted like the sea. Her hair, when he took the back of her neck into his hand, was coarse and tangled from their swim. The shock of her warm hands on his cold, bare chest nearly caused him to cry out, and she smiled into him. God, she knew exactly what she was doing to him.

It was impossible to know how long they stayed entwined in one another. James had lost all sense of time and space. All he knew was Lily. He knew he could stay like this forever and be just fine.

Unfortunately, Remus had other plans.

“OI!” Came the shout from the darkness. Lily and James jumped apart in alarm. Remus stood a ways up the beach with his arms crossed. It was hard to tell in the dark, but James would bet anything that he was smirking. “You’re not snogging my best mate down there, are you?”

“No!” cried James and Lily in unison.

“That’s what I thought. I hate to break up the party, but James, we’ve got to move. Mum will flip if we get the car back late.”

James nodded. It was a horrible thought, leaving Lily, but he’d seen Remus’ sweet-tempered mum angry only once before. He didn’t wish to repeat the experience.

“I’ve got to run,” he whispered apologetically to Lily. He grabbed her hand in the darkness, and for a moment they could have been back in the water, soaring over waves together. “I’ve got a few more days in town, then back to school. Can I meet you here again tomorrow?”

Lily beamed at him. “That sounds lovely. Maybe at school I’ll even allow you to be seen with me.”

He laughed, then kissed her once more. Remus’ exaggerated cough told him that it was, really, now time to go. “Do you need a ride home?”

She shook her head. “I’ve got my bike. See you tomorrow, then.”

His chest felt like it was fit to burst. They could do this all again tomorrow.

“See you then, Lily of the sea.”

He turned before he could see her roll her eyes again and made his way up the beach toward Remus. He put his hands in his pockets and tried his hardest to stifle the grin that was permanently etched upon his face.

Perhaps he wasn’t so mental after all.

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

so get this. I was gonna roll around in Tombstone related fluff today - but no, no - this post came across my dash so Now We Are Gonna Discuss the Carnal Consumption of Meat as it appears on That Show Supernatural.  YEAH BUDDIES!

(also my sincere apologies to OP of the inspiration post who innocently tagged it with “lunch date!”  because I am about to go Elsewhere, cursedly).

Let’s all go meat man, after the cut!

This analysis centers primarily on 5x14 Bloody Valentine.  The title of course is a semi-homage to a 3D Slasher Film Jensen starred in circa 2009. 

Which I will be renting soon I guess.  ,[<- parasocial panda GET BACK IN YOUR ENCLOSURE]

Also Its Really Fun that the trailer for Said Cinema ends with “nothing says date movie like a 3-D ride to hell” [are you also thinking of Cas pulling Dean out of hell, or are you normal?]  ***unironically the teaser for 5x14 is -

EXT. SIDEWALK - IN FRONT OF ALICE'S APARTMENT BUILDING

RUSSEL 

First date.

They then eat each other.  Literally they eat each others flesh.  They also do it while dirty talking about it.  SPN IS A SHOW 

ALICE Ugh! I've been so alone. So empty...

RUSSEL I know. Me too.

ALICE I want you, Russel---All of you... inside me...

[they both take bites out of each other, Alice chewing on a piece of Russel's flesh]

****Remember this detail, as it is important.

ANYWAY, it’s truly Cursed that not only are we doing an homage to this 3-D Jensen Horror Date Flick but also this episode is specifically centered on Valentine’s Day.  The day honoring romance and love Now Coopted by Hallmark, everyone, that is the day spn writers chose to introduce us to 

Sir Horseman of THE Biblical Apocalypse Famine. 

Canonically, we are aware that the show is drawing from the book of Revelations in its depiction of the Four Horsemen.  Here’s what it says about Famine -

"When He broke the third seal, I heard the third living creature saying, "Come." I looked, and behold, a black horse; and he who sat on it had a pair of scales in his hand.”

-Revelations 6:5

Famine holds scales (used to weigh out grain in times of food scarcity).  Spn’s depiction is represented as hunger, a bottomless pit of need.  It consumes souls (demon and human alike).  

Cas describes Famine a little more poetically:

CASTIEL 

"And then will come Famine riding on a black steed. He will ride into the land of plenty... "

"... and great will be the Horseman's hunger, for he is hunger. "

"His hunger will seep out and poison the air. "

***Consider a prior season in which we are introduced to the Seven Deadly Sins.  Which are the sins associated with hunger?

Gluttony

and Lust.

***this is also important

Back to the episode.  Case cold open, and we find out that Alice was a Nice Girl.  In that she didnt drink, smoke or

have premarital sex.

***So Alice’s hunger for the sin of Lust caused her to succumb to it; and her demise was presented as Gluttony (literally eating her partner’s flesh). HMM

Famine’s presence is affecting the town, and Cas is not immune.

DEAN 

And when did you start eating?

CASTIEL 

Exactly. My hunger-- it's a clue, actually.

***They lay it out a little more in case you missed it ->

SAM 

I thought famine meant starvation, like as in, you know, food.

CASTIEL 

Yes. Absolutely. But not just food. I mean, everyone seems to be starving for something--Sex, attention, drugs, love...

***this is so important.  but of course because its spn and our textual narrators are generally unreliable (even in a Ben Edlund episode, yes I know)

we get a red herring

CASTIEL 

Right. The cherub made them crave love, and then Famine came, and made them rabid for it.

***but that’s not accurate.  they didn’t get married or become obsessed with each other (remember the cursed coin in 4x08 Wishful Thinking and the unconditional love wish? not what happened here). they had premarital sex.  they did the thing Alice considers wrong, and dark, and sinful.  and then they ate each others’ flesh.

DEAN 

Okay, but what about you? I mean, since when do angels secretly hunger for White Castle?

CASTIEL 

It's my vessel-- Jimmy. His, uh, appetite for red meat has been touched by Famine's effect

***mad lad Jimmy Novak’s hunger is for...red meat?  He is starving for red meat?  You are telling me that the Novaks, red blooded conservative religious midwestern Novaks, ate RED MEAT SO SPARINGLY that Jimmy Novak was LITERALLY starving for it?!?!  No way.  Absolutely no way.  This is a man who was such a religious zealot he STUCK HIS HAND IN BOILING WATER and accepted an angel of the lord into his own body but his secret hunger was for fucking ground beef?

give me a damn break.

to me this is an absolute coverup.  Because Cas’s burger consumption is not related one iota to his vessel Jimmy Novak.

it is a representation of Cas falling.  Cas’s cravings for meat represent his growing (and very much prohibited) feelings for...humanity (Dean Winchester), and they are presenting as Gluttony in the form of his downing more and more copious amounts of red meat.  

SERIOUSLY, consider this - at one point the depiction is so desperately carnal that he is eating raw ground beef with his bare hands. It is fucking uncomfortable.  and it is SUPPOSED to be.  Famine stirs up hunger for the prohibited.  For the sinful. That which we are starving for but do not believe we can ever have, so we lust and we lust and we LUST after it, but should we allow ourselves even just a taste of what we have been ravenously craving, we binge it until we ourselves disappear into the oblivion of our own sinful, dark desires.

Since You Want More Examples of why this cant possibly be hunger for Cheeseburgers and Cheeseburgers alone, Consider Famine’s effect on Dean.  Remember his doctor kink?

**when its revealed that Doctor Corman has succumbed to Famine’s poison by drinking himself to death, Dean - very uncharacteristically by the way - reacts by saying out loud

DEAN Thanks. Crap! I really kind of liked this guy.

***please note that Doctor Corman says the following to Dean in the prior scene they have together -

DR. CORMAN [to Dean]

Agent Marley, you just can't stay away.

****was that a flirtation?

***Also, Dean doesn’t want to go out and chase tail for Valentines Day.   

SAM

I mean, what do you always call it-- Uh, unattached drifter Christmas?

DEAN 

Oh, yeah. Well... be that as it may...I don't know. Guess I'm not feeling it this year.

SAM 

So you're not into bars full of lonely women?

DEAN 

Nah, I guess not. [takes a sip of his beer] Ahh. What?

SAM 

That's when a dog doesn't eat-- That's when you know something's really wrong.

***oh look we are relating things to eating again.  sex/lust to gluttony.  hmmm hmmm hmmm

ANYHOW -  *takes deep breath*

 this is also the Episode Where This Scene Lives

****JACKTING JOICES

oh and speaking of jacting joices, this is also the Dean Notices Cupids Crotch Episode.

frAckles, I am once again asking why you only permit celestial beings to hug you from behi-[gunshots]

but Dean isn’t hungry.  Why? Famine has the explanation, and we get it after Dean immediately runs inside after Cas heads in to complete his portion of their plan barely giving him any time to do so because he misses him that much.

FAMINE 

I disagree. [Famine moves closer to Dean and touches him] Yes. I see. That's one deep, dark nothing you got there, Dean. Can't fill it, can you? Not with food or drink. Not even with sex.

DEAN 

Oh, you're so full of crap.

FAMINE 

Oh, you can smirk and joke and lie to your brother, lie to yourself, but not to me! 

***not Dean making all of those homophobic/homoerotic jokes every time he’s in danger or feeing uncomfortable; not that, that can’t possibly be what Famine is referencing, right?

I can see inside you, Dean. I can see how broken you are, how defeated. 

***not THIS parallel:

AMARA:

You're a mystery. I can see inside your heart. Feel the love you feel, except… It's cloaked in shame

You can't win, and you know it. But you just keep fighting. Just... keep going through the motions. 

***not the motions of performative heterosexuality!!

***Dean’s not hungry because in his heart he truly believes that he can’t actually have what he hungers for.  That Thing Which This Episode Overtly but Also Very Clearly Made Obvious.  It’s an angel riding shotgun [I did Do That and I am Not Sorry], eating a burger in the front seat of the impala.  But, I’ve deviated from the meat of this essay [gunshots] [this time just for the bad joke].

BONUS

there’s Exists another episode in which a man ravenously consumes red meat; eventually succumbing to eating raw beef with his bare hands in the season prior to this one.  

Yes Supernatural the Show That Brought Us Not One But Two Scenes of Persons Carnally Consuming Red Meat With Their Bare Hands.  

This episode is a MOTW - the man in question is a rougaru - a monster that starts out as human but due to some specific genetic disorder (hmmm hmmm hmm crack in THE chassis hmmm hmmm) soon begins to be extremely hungry - “for everything, but eventually long pig.” AKA human flesh. 

Wanna know the kicker?  

Episode’s called Metamorphosis.

(GIF by jackttwist)

I’ll see myself out.

[DOUBLE BONUS for extra credit:

if you really wanna wild out, go watch the scene of Jack the rougaru looking at himself in the mirror in 4x04 - and then meander on over to 7x01 and check out God!stiel looking in the mirror as the leviathans writhe inside him over there. It’s worth the walk.]

***oh and @lilac-void​ im tagging you in this one because in exchange for your KIND creator content nomination I guess I will respond by cursing you with an Honorary tag in this, a Meat Meta.  you’re welcome slash I'm sorry XO [but seriously thank you again for your kindness and appreciation; it really motivated me to sit down and get moving on making more content <3]

[all-things-crows]

Froy Gutierrez works as Nikolai. why, you ask? i'll tell you why ppl have been going off on Janis Ancens as Lanstov. he doesnt work bc he looks too mature. he has Nikolai's face structure, but he doesnt have the playfulness of his features, also Janis is a model and Froy is an actor. Nikolai's actor needs to be young. he needs to be a little puppy eyed pretty boy. bc thats literally what his kingdom thinks of him. the ppl of his kingdom last saw him when he was only a boy, so they all remember him as the little puppy-eyed pretty prince (sobachka), bc they didnt see him grow up, bc he went away to ketterdam and then his whole privateer business. thats one of the main reasons why he isnt taken seriously. and Froy has that face. Nikolai uses this to his advantage when he wants to. that's his whole appeal, his whole thing. Nikolai Lanstov is the little pretty prince until he tells you of the time he cut off a man's fingers and fed them to his dog. he's sweet and charming till he's dangerous and menacing. he's constantly putting on a show. it's essential that Nikolai looks young. he should look too young to be in charge of anything, let alone a whole country or a whole ship business. he should look too pretty and young to be able to do anything on his own until he threatens to accuse the king of ravka of rape (rightfully so) and takes matters into his own hands. he's smart, clever, charming and a loudmouth. everything he has, he uses to his advantage. thats what makes him a very enjoyable character. anyways i rest my case, thank you

[heyitsyn]

There Once Was A Man With No Arms-

Goshiki x Manager!Tendou!FirstYear!Sister!Reader

a/n: that was a mouthful

anon request: ahhh i loved your headcanons of iwaizumi dating oikawa's sister!!! this time, can i request goshiki x tendou's first year sis na manager din ng team nila? salamatttt hehe ingat ka lagiii💞

this cute little bowl cut babie

so you are the little baby sister of our favorite red hair cutie and he was the one who offered you the manager position

ofc you accepted bc hello, you get to hang out w your brother and tease semi-semi-senpai everyday

pls let semi live

everyone likes you though bc you are their manager and you do a lot of things for them even though you dont need to

like sometimes, you stop by the store and pick up all kinds of snacks and if its really hot, popsicles and ice cream

ushijima farmer-san is known to be quite stoic and serious but he’s pretty chill around you and even ruffles your hair whenever you make a stupid joke

as a tendou, you are basically like a ctrl+v  with your brother 

the same cute teasing and bubbly personality but the quick change to serious and demeaning

the team gets stressed, especially mom, bc he has to take care of not one red-head freak but two

but he liked you more though bc you were a first year and you were this short little pumpkin and you were so nice and just all around A D O R A B L E

but you just didnt rub goshiki the right way

maybe bc he thought you were just doing this as an act and no person could really be this bubbly and cheerful

or hes just jealous his senpais attention is directed to you

he will DIE FOR HIS SENPAIS

whenever he gets a good spike, you cheer him on and say things like, ‘nice spike, tsu-chan!’ and he swears youre just doing this bc you want to kill him with a heart attack and he doesnt like feeling like this but you like torturing him

boi what is with this logic

even though he lives for praises, your praises and compliments just hits different than his senpais

before he even realized it, he started all out glaring at you and tendou, being the overprotective brother he was, pointed him out on it

‘oi, little kouhai, you got a problem with our y/n?’

at the mention of your name you turned around from talking to the coach and everyone turned to goshiki, expecting him to answer

unfortunately you didnt hear what your brother said so you were just confused

‘hm? i read the room and i am not comfortable with the energy in the gym today’

someone snorted while goshiki turned red at the attention being on him with the topic of you so he just walks away back to the court

‘oh? what was that all about?’ 

semi shushes tendou and gives you a smile

‘y/n, can you help tossing the ball for us?’

you nodded and quickly ran to the chair and waddled over to put it by the net before standing on it

everyone turned red, including goshiki and even shirabu, and busted their uwus

‘okay! let’s go!’

youve always noticed tsutomu and his determination to beat ushijima which youve appreciated bc he was so hard-working and he was talented enough

‘good one, tsu-chan!’

‘t-thanks, y/n-san’

even when no one noticed it, you were always there to give him compliments and he always grows flustered and hes just a big idiot babie and doesnt realize that your praises makes his heart beat faster bc he thinks youre freaking pretty and someone pretty complimenting him in his spikes boosts his ego

but eventually, it grew on him

instead of looking around for any senpai to praise him, he now turned to you and you would give him that adorable smile and he would bite his lip to stop himself from running over and hugging the life out of you

then he remembers who your brother is, well more like how protective the boys were

‘waka-senpai, nii-chan got sick so he wants you to stop by his dorm later today!’

‘okay’

since you were their teammate’s sister, theyve known you for a while and watched you grow from being this little middle school girl to a first year high schooler 

you were practically their sister

goshiki went to a different middle school so he never really realized how the guys treated you so differently but he knew it would be difficult to win them over for your hand

oops wait what

this thought struck him just as he was drinking water and he ended up choking on water causing you to run over from talking to semi so you could pat his back

‘omg, tsu-chan, you need to be careful!’

this was only the beginning of weeks of being weird

like he was so distracted and different that shirabu actually yelled at him and refused to give him any tosses

‘you talk big about being the ace but the slightest distraction could cost you a match. are you really being serious about being the ace or is it all just talk?’

he got all sad and mopey and he had to sit on the bench 

goshiki never got benched

he was too good to be benched!

but he was and he did not like it

you went over to him and sat next to him

‘tsu-chan, can you follow me?’

he looked up from the floor and he shrugged before following you out of the door

the others watched their first years exit the gym and they contemplated following

but tendou, surprise!, actually stopped them

‘my sister can sort him out herself. trust me’

goshiki didnt exactly know where you were taking him to until you stopped by by the baseball field where there was mud

‘y/n-san, why-’

‘you always say my name formally, why is that? im a first year too, tsu-chan’

he looked down

‘um, i-i don’t know-’

‘y/n-chan, tsu-chan. try it out’

‘y-y/n-chan’

you squealed at how cute he looked w red ears and a red face but you refrained from hugging him

then you remembered why you brought him out

‘oh right! come here, tsu-chan!’

you took a branch from a nearby tree and encouraged him to crouch down with you as you began to draw on the mud

‘there was once a man with no arms-’

you started happily singing and this was when goshiki really realized the resemblance between you and your brother

you both were happy and cheerful bc you wanted to radiate the energy to the others to be happy too

and it worked

tendou’s funny songs and jokes always made the others laugh and you did too

goshiki was happy that he was able to absorb that energy and he soon completely forgot about shirabu’s comments

once you were done, you have drawn a dog on the mud and the boy was so amazed at the sudden creation

he looked up at you with wide eyes and you laughed with a wide grin at his expression

‘hehe, its cool, right? nii-chan showed me something like that before when i got sad and it made me happy again. i thought it would work on you too’

he might have questionable feelings around you bc when you mentioned being sad, he felt weird

like he was relieved he wasnt there to see you sad bc he couldnt take it seeing your usual grin into a frown and your bright shining eyes filled with tears

‘y/n-chan, when you get sad, call me, okay? so i can go to you and make you smile like you did with me’

your eyes widened in surprise but you nodded, your grin even wider

‘im counting on you, tsu-chan!’

and he did

when he received a call late at night from you, he easily snuck out from his dorm and ran to the baseball field where he saw your crouching figure aimlessly dragging the stick in circles

‘y/n-chan!’

he huffed and panted after running so fast and you looked up before running to hug him

‘im here now. youre okay’

you didnt release out your problems on him bc you didnt want to burden him

but he understood and just hugged you until you felt better enough to return to your crouching

goshiki hurriedly grabbed the stick and began to do the same thing you did for him before

‘then he jumped onto the lake and got stung by bees?’

he stopped and frowned, realizing he wasnt right

but the frown lifted when he heard your giggle

‘tsu-chan, he got stung by bees first and then he jumped on the lake!’

the corners of his mouth lifted and he chuckled

‘heh, i guess he did. but this is my version so listen closely, okay y/n-chan?’

this might be the reason you got close w the first year

the others noticed it too since you seem to pamper him and take more time taking care of him than them

like you even started wiping his sweat for him while he just giggles when you pull on the long strands of his hair

‘tsu-chan, i want to cut it!’

‘no, y/n-chan!’

‘but-!’

he grabbed your hands and your arms around his torso so he could do the same to you and gently tugged on the ends of your long hair

‘you too then, y/n-chan. your hair is long too’

you pouted then gently punched his chest

‘mean, tsu-chan’

‘heh?! mean?! how?!’

tendou is like the best big brother ever and hes just like ‘yuhhhh get it tsutomu!!!!’

eventually, goshiki began playing even better

his complete spike percentage has increased and his jumping has gotten higher

but the team predicts that this was all because he’s trying to show off to you and your praising and compliments have motivated him to play better

forget being ace, he just wants you to praise him

‘y/n-chan! y/n-chan! did you see that?’

‘wahh!!!! so cool, tsu-chan!!”

bus trips to matches are so cute but yall lowkey annoy the players a bit

yall sit next to each other and are just leaning together as you giggle over stupid cat videos

like we get, goshiki is getting some quicker than us

i feel like before moving on to relationships, goshiki and you would be best friends first and then move on to the dating stuff

tbh, theres no difference bc yall have always been like that but theres just an offical label now

‘hey, tsu-chan, wanna date?’

‘u-um,, sure?’

yall would hang out in either his dorm or yours and yall would be alone bc the team actually trusts you but you dont know that they pass by the door ever 5 minutes and listen in to just to make sure yall are not doing anything bad

smh they so nosy but we luv them

you know of his insecurities about not being enough and his fears of not being the ace and his dreams of playing to the big leagues and his passion to continue playing on the court for as long as he can and how excited he is to be able to spend all those years with you

he knows of your insecurities about the way you look and being associated with your apparent freak of a brother but you didnt care about that and even fought someone when they said something and your deep protectiveness for the boys, especially your brother but it’s all because the boys were the ones to accept you with open arms and treat you like family

yall shared a lot of secrets amongst yourselves and tbh, your communication is just *chefs kiss*

so serious fights dont happen, like ever, just stupid little arguments that are usually resolved like an hour later

since youre also a manager, its also your job to make sure the boys are maintaining their good grades and you know that shira-senpai has given up on tutoring tsutomu

i mean,,, goshiki is smart but he gets distracted easily and ends up spacing out during lessons

yknow?

thats when the little arguments bc youd be trying to teach him the damn phythagorean theorem and hed be distracted at how come your hair was styled like that today

‘goshiki tsutomu, i will leave your ass to fail right now if you dont stop touching my hair’

‘but babyyyyyy’

‘no, ‘dont baby’ me, you idiot! you’ll be crying like a baby when you fail and you’re bench during the next game!’

oof also!

hes a protective little babie and he gets jealous easily so whenever yall have games, he literally hangs all over you 

like he makes a show of putting his jacket over you and kissing your forehead so that the other teams know to stop looking over at your direction and whispering about you

ofc this gets on your nerves but you cant help but think how cute he looks when he gets jealous

he gets all pouty and touchy and youre just like, take my uwus you big babie

even tendou is like, ‘im her brother yet hes more protective than me’

he demands to be hugged 24/7 but thats not appropriate if youre in public so he ltr drags you outside and away from people just so he could hug you

he likes hugging you bc youre shorter than him and it makes him feel all special and soft since you like to burrow your face into his chest and your sweater paws are just like ugggggghhhhhhhhh

whenever he gets nervous, you kiss his fingers and his knuckles bc it soothes him and youre just his good luck charm and he feels like he can take over the world w a single kiss from you

‘baby, didja see that?! i was so cool, right?!’

‘so proud of you, tsu-chan! youre so cool!’

‘i love y/n like a sister but if she inflates his ego more, i will have to tape her mouth’

can you guess who said that?

overall a relationship i strive for and i really want a goshiki now thanks byeeeeeee

a/n: ngl goshiki’s hair lowkey triggered me when i first saw him bc why the heck does it look like that?! but now i actually like it on him and i cant imagine any other hairstyle fitting him

[obwjam]

pls ma'am.... ur headcanons for the hargreeves siblings finding a tiny...

IT’S FEEDING TIME

diego: would be very soft with any tiny he found under any circumstance. very much the stereotypical leans down, gasps, eyes are wide, staring at the tiny in utter fascination, asking for their name, promising that he won’t hurt them. he would insist on taking the tiny to safety and he immediately hides all his weapons because lawd knows what a million giant knives would look like to someone so small. he would offer them food and shelter and companionship and he would be super duper protective. like constantly going out of his way to keep them safe and make sure they didnt get into any trouble. also is a very good listener and is very understanding of them and their feelings. he never makes the tiny feel lesser

allison: she is a mother to the MAX. like so insanely protective of a tiny the way a mother protects her young. when she finds the tiny she wouldn’t even ask them what they wanted to do, she would just carefully scoop them up and b like “yeah you’re coming home with me and you’re my child now.” very much a helicopter parent in the sense that she NEVER lets the tiny go anywhere or do anything dangerous, and she sometimes has trouble remembering that they are self-sufficient, but she respects them and does it all because she cares. she makes the tiny a bed and little stuff like that to make them feel more at home. also, home cooked meals every day and every night (she is abhorred by the fact that a tiny’s diet is just stale food and crumbs)

klaus/ben: ugh. UGH. klaus would very much act demeaning without meaning to. he doesn’t see a tiny as a pet or anything like that, but he’s just obsessed with how adorable they are and he is very grabby and touchy. ben is constantly telling him to knock it off and he feels terrible that the tiny had to be found by klaus, of all the people that walk the earth. he would talk to them and obviously they cannot see or hear him but he enjoys the one-sided conversation anyway. ben is very fascinated by the tiny and likes to just look at them. klaus would lowkey pamper a tiny too, like those people who build fancy beds and rooms for their dog. he wouldn’t at all be surprised or fascinated by the existence of a tiny. he would be like “you know i kind of always suspected something was up” and it’s kind of relieving that klaus doesnt pepper them with questions or stare wide eyed at them all the time. but nevertheless he selfishly wants to keep the tiny around because he thinks they’re funky and it’s a mutually beneficial relationship where he gets another companion who can’t leave him and the tiny gets shelter, safety and food

luther: man is just the biggest dumbass of all time around a tiny. so clumsy and is constantly doing things to freak them out and he always sheepishly apologizes and then keeps doing the thing anyway. he means well, he really does, and he tries his best not to scare them too much or put them in any danger. he’s always trying to do things for the tiny to alleviate his guilt, so he’ll bring them food or find some trinket and be like “i got this for you, i thought you’d like it” and it’s like, a penny. but he’s very sweet and endearing and hey it’s the thought that counts right? is also very touchy and no matter how many times the tiny demands he ask before picking them up, he just never listens so the tiny just accepts their fate

vanya: she’d be SUPER nonchalant. like the cool aunt type. she would discover a tiny and immediately be like “do you want anything? i’m cooking dinner rn” and she just always knows what to ask and when to ask it. like after growing up as a hargreeves sibling she barely even cares that there’s a tiny person living in her walls. she’s like “aight bet we all need to survive” and she tells the tiny they can come out any time they want to take something or just to talk. vanya leaves food out for them every night and the tiny always takes it. she’s content with leaving the tiny alone, def doesn’t mind having their company but has no desire to bother them. she would help them with anything they ask and it’s very sweet. like the tiny shyly comes out and asks for water or something and vanya just goes oh yeah yeah of course! and get them water. she is a very relaxing person to be around and the tiny likes her a lot

five: hnnnnng i said this before but it would entirely depend on how five found a tiny. if he found them going through his shit and they were equally as combative, he would be a total bitch and jar them and intimidate them and everything. but if they were just really scared and clearly not looking to anger anyone, he would actually feel a great deal of sympathy and he wouldn’t be able to just forget them and leave them in danger. like he would be halfway gone, groan and then turn back around to get the tiny. he doesn’t really know what to do with them, like is he supposed to let them be free? is he supposed to keep an eye on them 24/7? but either way he figures something out and finds that he really doesn’t want to see them get hurt. he knows the world is dangerous and that hanging out with him is dangerous but he knows he can keep them safer than they would be alone. eventually it gets to a point where his enemies want to steal the tiny away from him as leverage and he would literally go fucking mad. like murdering the commission board mad. he doesn’t open up a lot but his actions are what show the tiny he really cares. five finds he would do just about anything to keep them safe and happy and it lowkey disgusts him but also he just has such a soft spot for the tiny

[somberspectraltrees]

LONG POST

So, I know it may be weird to some people that I post so often about animals. If you have known me for awhile, you know I wasnt always like this, so I understand your confusion. I wasnt ANTI-animal at all, I was just unaware of how they could change a life.

My family had a few pets growing up, but they were largely independent and spent most of the days outside so I hardly saw them. And the one dog we had, Kato, kept nipping at our ankles and was allegedly given to a ranch in northern California (still skeptical about this but my mom still swears it's what happened).

Then, around 2003, a beautiful german shepard-collie mix found me and my ex-husband, and we named her Schatzie. I really did love her but I never really connected with her as I kept her off of the bed, the couch, etc. This is so regrettable because I couldnt imagine a more perfect dog than her.

Around 2011, my life started to unravel and I began to feel my then-partner disconnect from me. By 2013, I had disintegrated into something unrecognizable and, desperate for connection, I let the darkness swallow me up. Between 2014 and 2016, I was completely torn down, unrecognizable to even myself. I was ready to die until I recognized a small light inside of me; a light that I knew was me.

This light was my desire to help people. I love helping and I love encouraging. This is what started me on my way back to myself, and to rebuilding me. I was afraid of other people because of the trauma that loving others can inflict on me. I was concerned I had lost the capacity to love. In my excitement to rebuild myself stronger, I worried I had forgotten to make myself deeper.

During the initial stages of my remodeling, I went through a lot of tough times and I was scared to go through them alone.

Then I met Bear.

He was the first dog I ever met that understood what was going on inside my heart. During the three weeks I spent with him, he became something of a big brother and confidant. He was my protector. I didnt know animals could do that.

A few years later, I met Kiko. When my roommate propsed the idea of taking him off of his family's hands, I fell into my old script: fine but no cat in the bed, no cat on the furniture, im not cleaning out the litter box. However, when I met him, I suddenly just saw this pure little heart and understood that, "Hey. This little man was found in a parking lot alone. I can help him. We get the chance to show him he is loved and will never have to be alone again." And then I felt this huge surge of love inside of me and I realized that, it wasnt that I forgot to make my heart deeper, its just that I didnt know where to pour out this excess of love.

And then little miss Maya, with her playful heart and eagerness to love, I am in love yet again! I was so scared I lost the capacity to love and animals, especially those who have been rescued and given another chance to find a forever home, have shown me that I absolutely have not.

When I let these lovely little lives into mine, i understood that my capacity for love had grown and that I felt safe letting them have the love I wanted to give. I cant imagine not letting them into every part of my life, including the bed and the couch!

I dont know what happened exactly, but as I have grown and done things to repair myself, my heart has become bigger and all of this love has filled it up and I need a place to let it all go, and POOF! Suddenly I am an animal person, melting at the sight of a furry friend, and cry-laughing at The DoDo videos 🤷‍♀️

So please know that although this newfound understanding of animals is new to me, it has always been a part of me. Because they are helpers, and they let me help them, I understand that they are a part of that light that I recognize as myself. It just took a bit of breaking to find myself whole.

Take some time out today to love on and appreciate animals. Whether it be loving on the ones you have, spreading the word about ones that still need to find their forever homes, or donating to a shelter or animal rescue, let yourself love and BE loved!

[flowersandcorpse]

She’s Optimistic (Not Me) Ch.3

This is a Corpse Husband fic. Chapter Three actually. If you missed chapter one or two, don’t fret. I’ll leave the links below :) Feel free to comment, share, and send me questions. I love hearing from you all.

Genre: Slowburn, friends to lovers, angst, pining

TW: abuse, mental and health complications

Chapter One 

Chapter Two

The room was dark and cold as Corpse stepped aside for her. She walked in, albeit slowly at first as she glanced around the gloomy apartment. The lights were off and with the exception of the moon, the only light present was being poured in through the crack in the front door. Nevertheless, Alice carried on inside, noting how nice his furniture looked and how much bigger his apartment space was from her own.

“H-how many rooms?” She questioned, her mouth agape as she looked down Corpse’s narrow hallway.

“Just four.” He responded curtly. Corpse knew it was odd that amongst all the studio and two bedroom apartments in this complex, he was only renter with four bedrooms on a top floor. He wasn’t blind to how suspicious it made him, he just didn’t care.

But it was obvious Alice did.

“Do you have roomates? Or a dog or something.” She mused whipping her head around before focusing in on Corpse. “This place is wild.”

In his husky voice, drained of all emotion, he nodded back. “I live alone… I like it that way.”

Alice sighed, long and winded at his response. She was quite sure he wasn’t as hollow and void of personality as he wanted to come off. She didn’t know how exactly, but she was going to crack his shell, maybe even pry it off him. If it meant she could learn more about her hidden away neighbor who lived in the mysteriously nice apartment.

Corpse moved to close the door behind them before guiding Alice to his living room. It was nothing special. Just a long black couch, a book shelf adjacent, and a nice tv mounted on the wall. But once again, Alice was entranced in the wonder of it all. Corpse noticed how wide her eyes were, how interested she seemed to be in his little world. When was the last time he had company over? Fuck. He didn’t know and frankly he didn’t care to remember. He was stuck in this moment, feeling himself being drawn towards her.

“So,” he brightened. “Do you usually invite yourself into people’s apartments?” He phrased it as a lighthearted question, but he genuinely wanted to know. He hoped the answer would be no, that she chose him because she thought he was interesting and different, and not because this is simply how she makes friends.

“Not particularly.”

Corpse smiled at that and Alice noticed, throwing herself against the slender couch.

“How do you do that?” She asked; face soft and understanding.

“Do what?” Corpse frowned.

“Act so cold and alone.” She sighed. “And then smile like that... I want to know how you do it?”

“Fuck.” Corpse dragged out sitting opposite of her on the couch. “You’re really trying to call me out, huh?”

“No!” Alice laughed. It was a bright and soft sound. Corpse felt himself grow elated because of it. “I just noticed it.”

“Well Alice, I don’t know.” He smiled more. Corpse was never the type of person to open up or let go. He never had deep conversations with strangers or even friends. He didn’t want to be a loner, but the truth is… he didnt have a choice. His walls towered miles above the average person’s. His thoughts, every thought, repeated itself over and over and over again, crashing inside his head.

But even so, for whatever reason, Corpse felt… comfortable around Alice. He didn’t particularly understand why or how, but he knew that in this moment, she could ask him anything and he wouldn’t have the willpower to turn her down.

He must’ve been staring because Alice had stopped laughing and instead was zeroing in on the rips on Corpse’s thigh; her face red and hot. She moved to brush a streak of silver hair behind her ear, when the faintest of lights beamed on a sliver of skin, just below her chin.

It was dark and neither of the two were entirely of sound mind, but even in the quiet buzz of it all, Corpse could make out faded marks stretched against Alice’s neck. Without hesitation, he straightened his posture and demanded.

“How’d you get those?”

Well, Alice was focused now.

“Get what?”

“The marks on your throat,” he scoffed. He didn’t want to come off rude or even bothered, but by the tone of his voice, how it deepend and cut through the thick air between them, it was obvious the lighthearted conversation they had earlier had dissipated.

Alice tried laughing it off.

“Sex,” she whispered.

Oh fuck, duh, He thought. Makes sense.

“Oh-”

A wave of embarrassment rushed over Corpse. It had been a while since he got laid sure, but… to forget about… that. Yeah, he felt out of touch.

“I’m joking!” She half yelled, hesitantly scooting closer to him. “It’s a long story, but sorry for freaking you out.” The blush on her neck had blossomed onto her collarbones, making her skin look more blushed than tan. Corpse felt his mouth go dry.

“It’s fine,” he replied.

Alice lowered her voice again, eyes sparkling and locked on Corpse.

“Stop worrying….”

Jest was laced throughout her words as her eyes darted from Corpse’s to his snakebites and back to the bushy mess of hair that shaded his eyes. She mockingly lifted her hand up to him; her slender fingers curved and aimed at him.

“It’s not like I’m gonna choke you”

Fuck me... This chick is crazy.

There was no question how Corpse would respond to Alice’s bold and frankly questionable behavior. Energy matched Energy.

“Go ahead,” he teased, lowering his voice for effect. “It’s not like you would actually fucking dare.”

Alice froze and Corpse mentally patted himself on the back for getting such a strong reaction from her. His tongue darted from his lips and toyed with one of his snakebites before he leaned forward, his eyes piercing the stunned woman before him. He was putting his throat on display, showing off his pronounced collarbones that peeked from his loose shirt. The pale light illuminated the red on his lips and the tan of his neck. If she wanted a show, he was going to make it clear that she was the entertainment, not him.

Her hand hadn’t moved since he prompted her to choke him. Alice had turned into a mess of heavy breathing and hesitant glances. Every time she dared to stare back, her chest would tighten and the butterflies in her stomach would dance violently against her ribs. She was shyer than she let on.

Alice stuttered out a breathy “I… I would dare,” before slowly unstiffening her fingers. She wanted to dare to be bold and courageous and reach for the dark stranger’s throat, but her arms felt like jelly and as she got closer to Corpse, she felt her wrist go lower and lower and lower.

But before her hand could fall flaccid against her lap, she felt a firm grasp on her shaking wrist.

Corpse.

Holy mother of god, she panted internally. Five gentle fingers wrapped delicately around her wrist, cold and stern. Her hand was shaking but she hoped her heart wouldn’t give out as she glanced down to see the fingers wrapped firmly against her skin. His hands were hard with broad fingers, but his grasp was gentle, his thumb brushing comfortingly against her hot skin. Or maybe it was his touch that burned.

Beautiful veins threaded themselves underneath the warmth of his skin and as she locked eyes with the man just inches away, silver streaks of hair untangled themself from behind her ear.

Alice felt like puddy in Corpse’s touch. His hands were cold and rough like the ones she was used to, but his touch… Corpse’s touch was gentle, soft, almost excruciatingly perfect as he pulled her closer, his lips parting to form a cocking half smile.

Almost as if this were her first time being this close to anyone, Corpse firmly guided her hand to his throat, eyes as unbothered and stoic as ever.

“There, you go.” He whispered, letting out a low hum of satisfaction. He positioned each slender finger around the base of his throat, running the the tip of Alice’s shaky pointer finger along his adam's apple before flattening her palm around the base of his neck. He hummed letting the vibration course through her already shaking hand.

Alice’s eyes widened, but she didn’t dare move. It felt dangerous, exciting even. She opened her mouth to speak, but once again, Corpse cut her off, lowering his face to hers and smirking as the cool skin of his lips brushed lightly against the hot tip of her right ear.

The lights outside dimmed and Alice felt her eyes flutter shut as Corpse lowly hummed into her ear, hand still unsurely resting against his throat as he teasingly muttered. The room was dead quiet with the exception of the dull thud of Alice’s heartbeat and the unmistakably deep and sultry words…

“Very good.”