#i didn't even make any posts about this

[pumpumdemsugah]

An black man got lynched and strangled in bus yesterday

But "male violence" though lol

And 4 to 7 Black women in America are murdered every single day almost exclusively by Black men, if this is competition now

5 women and girls are killed every hour globally from femicide

I'm Black. Fuck off. Come back with a less remedial " counter ". You lot genuinely think racism cancels out misogyny and will use the death of someone to do that because you're dumb, desperate and probably unemployed

You lot never have anything to say about issues that impact Black women because racialised misogyny scrambles your little brain. Even if we spun Black female issues as a race only issue, you still wouldn't care because you're a misogynist who's pissy that I'm posting words on the internet.

What a massive loser. Which one of my posts sent you over the edge ?

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[inkskinned]

the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.

sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.

you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.

it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.

but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.

they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.

they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.

barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.

and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.

but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.

they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!

this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.

[ryllen]

and some extra unused stuff while they are in affectionate mood

[autisticrosewilson]

It's not that I hate fanon or that I think fanon is inherently less intelligent or morally wrong, but a LOT of fanon is based in racism, misogyny, and classism that I feel like a lot of you accept without question.

WHY is Duke (Daredevil, son of a god, has never once allowed himself to be defined by anyone's actions but his own) relegated to a background role, only characterized by reacting to the whims of other bats?

Why is Babs - Birds of Prey leader and backbone of the hero society, tells Bruce to fuck off and die 4 times a day and is constantly ruining her relationships by being biased and unhinged - Gotham bound, the mature responsible mom of the group who never argues with Bruce and never gets in trouble?

Why is Dick, both a tactical genius and master manipulator, a himbo only appreciated for his sex appeal? Especially when he is both Romani (group of people demonized and condemned as hypersexual by their nature alone) and an SA victim.

WHY is Damian "feral" and "uncivilized" despite being raised as a literal prince? Half of you treat him like a sociopath with no hope of redemption for an unfunny three second joke and the other half of you go full throttle into Bruce's white savior bullshit so that Damian can be "redeemed". Y'know when you're not villainizing Talia and acting like Dick is his other parent, actually.

WHY is Stephanie - extremely intelligent detective who can't stand Bruce and has a living mother she loves - lumped in as another member of the Batfam, a blonde ditz who only cares about prank wars and emotionally supporting Tim?

WHY is Cass - intelligent, a grown adult, suicidal perfectionist - emotionally intelligent, primarily existing to support the characters around her, immediately accepting of everyone she meets regardless of her own morals?

Why is Bruce the golden standard? Enough so that though everyone in the fandom could agree that he's an emotionally unstable wreck, being considered "the most like him" is seen as a compliment and not the HIGHEST insult? Everyone would agree if I said that Bruce purposely self sabotages his relationship half the time and the other half he simply does things without caring about the emotional impact it will have on people because he has to be the smartest in the room, but if I said that makes him a shit partner and emotionally abusive parent the fandom would bend over backwards to argue with me.

Why is Tim "the best Robin" when Dick Grayson invented the mantle, it is impossible for someone to embody the spirit of Robin better than him because he made it and he created what being Robin means. Maybe Tim is the best in Bruce's eyes, but what Robin means and who has the right to give it over was a significant thing they argued about. Tim the high school drop out, and yet also somehow the smartest? Tim "the most like Bruce" except no he's not, that's Cass. Poor neglected, abused, victimized little Timmy (the rich boy at the elite boarding school with loving albeit busy parents and almost every instance of him being victimized by another character has either been racist bullshit - The Al Ghuls and Rose Wilson- or a complete 180 for the character that made no sense when examined through the lens of prior characterization - Jason for instance.)

Almost every fanon trope that gets passed around like gospel seems to deliberately push POC characters and women into the background and strip them of interesting complex traits and stories, usually for the purpose of fitting them all into bite sized incorrect quote character types and uncomplicated narrative roles that are not only completely divergent from canon, but primarily exist to prop up the two rich white boys.

Also the insistence that Bruce, a 20 year old at the time, should actually be excused for how much he mentally and emotionally fucked Dick up because really they're more like siblings! While deciding that Dick at the same age was actually the perfect candidate to be Damian's new parent/guardian...have you lost the fucking plot you don't even make sense to yourselves.

Okay I lied at the beginning, I do hate fanon. You guys are so uncritical about the media you consume it is BEYOND just letting people enjoy things and have fun. I guess it's one thing if you KNOW this stuff isn't canon and UNDERSTAND why these tropes are problematic and you engage with it as such, it's fine read and write what you want, but just spreading the same nonsense around and parading it around as "better than canon" (version of the character so bland and boring you've somehow made the old white men at DC look like geniuses in the art of representation) is just infuriating.

[secriden]

*cracks knuckles* Okay lets talk about the elephant in the room: Style going to the support group for those who've suffered loss and telling what appears to be a fake story about losing his pet dog.

I'm going to point out a few things that I think provide a framework for Style's actions here. Not because I think it excuses what he did, but because I think a nuanced read is what the character deserves.

Point 1: An irresistible opportunity

The subs put the "Support Group for Loss" on the image in the notebook, but I'm not sure there's anything to suggest that Style would've known that was what this image represents until he showed up and saw the sign on top of the door.

In episode 2, Bison says, "He plans everything down from years, months, weeks to days" and then tells Kant:

So Style is literally just going to addresses/locations at given days and times, potentially not knowing what to expect. And as much as Fadel is certainly attending this meeting as a response to having that heartbreaking flashback (😭), this is also something he attends regularly and has planned to attend way in advance. So Style has no reason to think Fadel is attending this meeting because of a recent resurfacing of his pain.

What we, the audience, and what the characters know are very different things.

Now, should Style have turned his cute ass right around once he realised what this meeting was? Of course he should. But that wouldn't have been true to Style's character. We've been told by his best friend that he is "crazy" and been shown repeatedly that he lives right up to that description.

Style is impulsive. He's all base instinct and he acts on his desires without thought or contemplation. And by this point he is desperate for a deeper connection with Fadel. He's fascinated, captivated by the mystery that is Fadel and this is an excellent opportunity to finally see behind the wall Fadel so carefully maintains.

When Style sees the sign above the door, Style looks at the notebook (which, again, shows nothing but people sitting in a circle with the words RISE UP) like he's just realising what it means. He then gets this amused, almost rueful look on his face (like he's thinking "am I really going to do this?") before it shifts to determination and he walks through the door.

(My soul for the ability to once again gif something because FUCK Dunk is doing SO MUCH in this show!!)

To Style, this is just too good of an opportunity to give up.

Because let's be real, Fadel is so clearly lying and hiding something:

Fadel is shady as FUCK. He is simultaneously actually a really good cook (Style finally tries his burger so he knows, now), and also has the skills to work at a strip host club, and also can take on 3 guys in a fight, and also can break a man's arm with his thighs. Can you honestly blame Style for losing his mind just a little bit about wanting to get his hands on something, anything, to figure this man out?

Style is being absolutely consistent in his persistence to understand Fadel. This isn't about the car or about finally 'winning' the fight (thank you @airenyah for giving such a detailed framework to understand what Style's been doing until this point) anymore. This is about Style wanting to know Fadel himself.

Point 2: The potential implications of the setting

Now, what might give us a bit of insight as to why Style is this way? I have a theory (albeit one that could prove to be very wrong, but hear me out). I think this whole entire show is set in what could potentially be quite a small town/suburb.

There's a few things that make this theory plausible:

(1) Fadel and Bison are in hiding after Bison blew their previous cover. They're probably on the run from some section of the authorities and so it makes sense to settle in a quiet/out of the way place.

(2) Style seems to be really familiar with the people in the area. Like he grew up there and its the kind of small town where everyone knows everyone and everyone is in everyone else's business.

(3) Style is clearly the darling of the market aunties and uncles.

Style just lost her a sale and potentially a loyal customer, and she's still rooting for him? In episode 2, when Style asks the uncle to let him borrow his cart, it takes nothing but his word for the uncle to give Style his entire cart of produce for his ridiculous scheme.

Style is so clearly someone they all know well and have great affection for, and a very plausible explanation for this is that they all watched him grow up and the entire market (town/village) is fond of him.

And honestly?? Yeah, we see the way Style is actually quite sweet in that careless, guileless, thoughtless way. He goes the extra mile to fix his mistake with Fadel by replacing his car parts for free in episode 1. He helps out by taking orders in episode 2 without being asked and takes it seriously. In episode 3, he tries to drive more business to Fadel's store (bless him, he so clearly does NOT understand how restaurants work, but he MEANS well!!), and can we all acknowledge that it works?? He understands how to appeal to potential customers in the area because he knows the people there. It's not (entirely) his fault that Fadel wasn't remotely prepared for an actual rush crowd and Bison was off getting kinky with Kant and not doing his (fake) job. He is so clear about not judging Fadel's host job and tries his hardest to help him (to absolutely NO effect, but still) when the 3 guys gang up on Fadel.

Style is so loved and more importantly so very loveable.

Point 3: What this could mean for Style's character

So, potentially, Style is someone who grew up in a small town, who has been well loved, potentially spoiled and coddled, but also very much kept within the confines of the narrow viewpoint that a quiet, country town places on you.

It's in the way his dad scolds him as if he was still a child when he's at least in his mid to late 20s. It's in the way Style was so mad at Fadel for scolding him ("thanks for the lecture, dad"), like that hit a sore point for Style. It's in the way no one in the market takes him seriously; they're fond, but he's still a kid in their eyes. It's in the way he has an abundance of free time like he doesn't REALLY need to work at his dad's shop. It's in the way he sees Fadel beat 3 guys up with ease, starts wondering if Fadel is an assassin or a hitman, and is completely unfazed like he doesn't quite have a handle on reality.

It's in the way his best friend is a man who has no qualms about lying to him and putting his life in danger, and how Style seems to have no other friends or people (aside from his dad) in his life.

@wuxian-vs-wangji made a comment to me about Style being desperate for a meaningful connection, and I think she hit the nail on the head. Because along comes Fadel, a mysterious stranger with a suspiciously versatile set of skills who is also very hot and keeps giving Style these wonderfully complex reactions? Who sometimes wants nothing to do with Style, but at other times seems to be at war within himself about desperately wanting him? Who treats Style with anything but apathy?

This is catnip to Style; he never had any hope of resisting this.

Breaking news: Style is a complex and imperfect character...

Here's the thing, though: he was never going to try. The show has been incredibly upfront about who Style is as a person. Regardless of whether I'm correct about why he is this way (ie. that he is very much the product of the environment that didn't know how to handle a kid with Style's personality), episode 3 shouldn't have surprised anyone about Style. He's been incredibly consistent and true to himself.

He wants Fadel and he's "crazy" enough to go all in, no holds barred about it, and the Support Group was the biggest doorway to finally discovering something REAL about Fadel.

And its not just about sex or to prove his superiority anymore. Because if it was just that, then Style would have reacted very differently to their first time.

In this scene, Style is pleased and evidently enjoying himself, but he isn't exuberant. He isn't overcome with joy. If anything, he was more happy and excited when Fadel let him help out in the diner (I mentioned this in the tags in this post too) than he was when Fadel is literally fucking him. He lets Fadel set the pace; barely moves to touch Fadel except to hold him close. Almost like he doesn't want to accidentally mess this up, like he's worried he'll take too much, so he'll take what Fadel gives him and no more (please appreciate @braceletofteeth's amazing tags on this post). For a character that has been so aggressively on the offensive, this is shocking until you realise that sleeping with Fadel - while it's a step in the right direction - isn't Style's end goal anymore.

And he makes that abundantly clear in this episode:

Does Style even fully realise the weight of this desire? I doubt it. But I do believe that Style is in earnest. He doesn't fully understand his own feelings, but he also doesn't really care to either. All he knows is that he wants Fadel, wants his attention and his passion and his focus and his heart.

...but Style is also kind of, sort of, perfect.

Because he's exactly, precisely, breathtakingly exactly what Fadel needs.

Because Fadel is hurt and broken and bleeding inside. Because Fadel is barely holding it all together for Bison's sake, but has already given up hope for any true happiness for himself. Because Fadel can't trust anyone or anything in his life, when he's been used and used and used by the family who should've loved and cared and protected him.

Because it's going to take nothing short of this kind of unwavering, unshakable, uncomplicated determination to give Fadel even a chance of healing and opening his heart to love again.

[anghraine]

jenndoesnotcare replied to this post:

Every time LDS kids come to my neighborhood I am so so nice to them. I hope they remember the blue haired lady who was kind, when people try to convince them the outside world is bad and scary. (Also they are always so young! I want to feed them cookies and give them Diana Wynne Jones books or something)

Thank you! Honestly, this sort of kindness can go a really long way, even if it doesn't seem like it at the time.

LDS children and missionaries (and the majority of the latter are barely of age) are often the people who interact the most with non-Mormons on a daily basis, and thus are kind of the "face" of the Church to non-Mormons a lot of the time. As a result, they're frequently the ones who actually experience the brunt of antagonism towards the Church, which only reinforces the distrust they've already been taught to feel towards the rest of the world.

It's not that the Church doesn't deserve this antagonism, but a lot of people seem to take this enormous pride in showing up Mormon teenagers who have spent most of their lives under intense social pressure, instruction, expectation, and close observation from both their peers and from older authorities in the Church (it largely operates on seniority, so young unmarried people in particular tend to have very little power within its hierarchies). Being "owned" for clout by non-Mormons doesn't prove anything to most of them except that their leaders and parents are right and they can't trust people outside the Church.

The fact that the Church usually does provide a tightly-knit community, a distinct and familiar culture, and a well-developed infrastructure for supporting its members' needs as long as they do [xyz] means that there can be very concrete benefits to staying in the Church, staying closeted, whatever. So if, additionally, a Mormon kid has every reason to think that nobody outside the Church is going to extend compassion or kindness towards them, that the rest of the world really is as hostile and dangerous as they've been told, the stakes for leaving are all the higher, despite the costs of staying.

So people from "outside" who disrupt this narrative of a hostile, threatening world that cannot conceivably understand their experiences or perspectives can be really important. It's important for them to know that there are communities and reliable support systems outside the Church, that leaving the Church does not have to mean being a pariah in every context, that there are concrete resources outside the Church, that compassion and decency in ordinary day-to-day life is not the province of any particular religion or sect and can be found anywhere. This kind of information can be really important evidence for people to have when they are deciding how much they're willing to risk losing.

So yeah, all of this is to say that you're doing a good thing that may well provide a lifeline for very vulnerable people, even if you don't personally see results at the time.

[sacchiri]

Hellsing 2002 calendar illustration.

Ein wunderliche und erschröckliche Hystori von einem großen Wüttrich genant Dracole wayda Der do so ganz unkristenliche marrter hat angelegt die mensche, als mit spissen als auch die leut zu Tod geslyffen

A wondrous and frightening story about a great berserk called Dracula the voivode who inflicted such unchristian tortures such as with stakes and also dragged people to death

[genericpuff]

what people assume i'm thinking while i'm working on rekindled: "GRRR I HATE LO AND RACHEL!!! I HATE HER SO MUCH!!! THIS WILL SHOW HER AND HER FANS! THIS WILL SHOW ALL OF THEM! I HOPE RACHEL SEES THIS AND CRIES!!!"

what i'm actually thinking while i work on rekindled: "man i'm having a great time working on this but i can't wait to be done with this panel that's driving me nuts. i wonder how i can get that cool splatter effect rachel did in S1. bright colors make brain go brrrr. i can't wait to get to the part where hades clowns on himself. oof i'm hungry, i need to figure out what to have for dinner tonight. oh look, an 11 hour retrospective on the simpsons-"

[blackpilljesus]

You don't identify yourself as rad fem or feminist? Why? Also why don't you prominently post about men and misogyny?

Interesting ask, I knew someone would ask me about this eventually.

I'll answer the first question in a separate post but for the second question it's a few things even though I do speak about misogyny & maIes. For starters everyone already does that. I dont have much to say that someone else wont have already said; if you notice most of my blogs here are reblogs. Besides, as I've said (& shown) many times, everyone is aware about these things - at least the basics & enough to know it's a significant threat - they just dont care because they benefit from it. Just like how maIes pretend to not know, many women also pretend to be unaware & also pretend to be more righteous when many of them aid & enable maIe evil. Many women advocate for things against women as a collectives best interest bc they're only thinking for themselves but when it blows up in their faces they run to what they protested so it's not naivety. Better for another woman to be thrown to the dogs than them, they get to higher positions by stepping on other women. Like yeah yeah oppression & all but it doesn't make their actions less fucked up & free from being criticised.

Also, I've spoken extensively about moids & misogyny on other platforms and generally speaking I'm tired and over it. I'm done worrying about things out of my control. I'm over seeing the same reptitive points about maIe evil discussed & witnessed only for those complaining to go back to happily fucking & birthing maIes. No amount of talking about maIe evil + misogyny to most women will change things bc in the end moids will get away with their evil & women will still defend, love + reproduce them anyways. Writing endless posts on maIes & misogyny becomes redundant & counterproductive if there's no way forward which is common. Idc anymore because most women dont care & I've seen the lengths women will go to sabotage other women. The typical excuse for many women is that they dont know or need to "unlearn" internal misogyny but even with women that do know, women that have read many feminist books, done the VoLuNtEeRiNg, seen the stats & news of moid violence, etc - they still love, empathise with, defend, and happily birth moids. The women that complain & pull this "we're all in it together" crap just got screwed over by their nigels and will drop everything for another nigel they find anyways & I'm done with being used + wasting my time. I saw a tiktok of a woman talking about how soldiers brutally raped girls to the point their pelvises were shattered & many of the girls died from injuries yet she talks about how she + other women still love moids & believe they can change. She also mentioned the andrea dworkin quote about knifes towards the end "I don’t believe rape is inevitable or natural. If I did, I would have no reason to be here. If I did, my political practice would be different than it is. Have you ever wondered why we [women] are not just in armed combat against you? It’s not because there’s a shortage of kitchen knives in this country. It is because we believe in your humanity, against all the evidence". It's not women being "too empathetic" it's pathetic. Oh and this "excess empathy" is never given to other women & girls. Many of these women will rip you apart for much less.

Ironically, most of the loudest voices against maIes + misogyny are maIe lovers & apologists. They have a maIe partner or are looking for one. They speak endlessly on misogyny & go round in circles with the same talking points and endless articles of maIe violence with an interest to "change" maIes bc they love them. Despite everything they say about maIes you're public enemy #1 if you talk about having spaces or life without them. Reminds me of the below.

This ask mostly hits the nail on the head bc this is what I felt when I first left feminism. I used to be a huge fact fem on Instagram years ago until I realised it wasn't worth it. Didn't matter how many stats, stories, and arguments I pulled. Maturing, especially as a single childfree woman is realising that all this shit goes beyond witty one-liners & "gotchas" pulled.

To be clear, I dont think its bad to talk about these things; some people do need that wakeup call and it helped me years back & i'll likely make more posts on moids & misogyny in the future but instead of just constantly reinventing the wheel (which I'm also guilty of tbh); the wheel needs to be used to move forward. However realistically I dont think feminism will do that so I see it as a stepping stone instead.

However, it's also not that necessary anymore because maIes are peaking women more than any feminist text would. Very slowly but a lot of women are waking up to just how disgustingly maIes think of + treat women due to the internet. So while that's happening I'd rather focus on what's next.

[pastelaspirations]

Is your fanfic on ao3 or somewhere else?? I need to get to reading it lol

W e l l. U m. Okay. Like, I should have expected this. Especially with a certain TWO people going around, clamoring for people to read it. Am side-eying you, Moldiee and Anayz, h a r d-

So uh. Y e a h, it's on ao3. Linked here for your convenience. JUST. It's l o n g. It doesn't start out that way, it starts off short, but then just gets longer and l o n g e r and-

Let's just say you're going to be reading this for a while probably

[wonder-worker]

I've been thinking about the tragedy of Elizabeth Woodville living to see the end of her family name.

I don't mean her family with her husband, which lived on through her daughter and grandson. I mean her own.

Her sisters died, one by one, many of them after 1485. When Elizabeth died, only Katherine was left, and she would die before the turn of the century as well.

All her brothers died, too. Lewis died in childhood. John was executed. Anthony was murdered. Lionel died suddenly in the peak of Richard's reign, unable to see his niece become queen. Edward perished at war. Richard died in grieving peace. For all the violence and judgement the family endured, it was "an accident of biology" that ended their line: none of the brothers left heirs, and the Woodville name was extinguished. We know the family was aware of this. We know they mourned it, too:

“Buy a bell to be a tenor at Grafton to the bells now there, for a remembrance of the last of my blood.”

Elizabeth lived through the deposition and death of her young sons, and lived to see the end of her own family name. It must have been such a haunting loss, on both sides.

[inkskinned]

im gonna start a fight; and, at the same time, i need you to take this in the most good-faith way possible, but:

videos that involve body-checking and intentionally (and uncritically) show a mealplan of an unhealthy number of calories are just a revamped version of pro-ana food diaries.

and yeah, i know there's arguments. i address some of them under the cut. but at the end of the day, we're just coming back to romanticizing mental illness; we've just found a better platform for it.

this is already something we've done. we knew it was wrong and tried to stop it. and tbh. it just wasn't enough.

there are people who argue "well, what if you have an eating disorder, you can't help it if you don't eat!" except that as someone with an ED; we are not infants. we know what we're doing. part of having an ED is that you are like, maybe too self-aware. even if we can't help our own food choices, we don't need to fucking romanticize the disorder - something we've been warning you about since 2013. there are hours of setup, filming, and editing that go into these videos. they do not happen to fall into place randomly. there is a reason they are pieced together to be beautiful, bright, inspiring.

there's this woman who pretty much only posts daily plans under a normal amount of calories, and everyone defends her saying but it's better than nothing! and i'm like. except she opens those with images of her showing off her body and provides no context in the video or caption that suggests that she believes what she's doing is unhealthy. she has hundreds of thousands of followers on a platform designed for young kids and teens. i refuse to believe that by accident her content just happens to be cheery advice on "healthy" versions of starving.

for any other symptom of mental illness, we would be incredibly enraged by this kind of placid acceptance of a "tips and tricks" fast-start guide. imagine if people posted pink & pretty videos saying "best places to cut yourself" as if it was a fucking storytime. we, as a society, are so fucking fatphobic that we would rather accept blatantly harmful displays of self harm than admit that we are obsessed with a hyper-thin body type.

i am not suggesting someone never talks about their disorder. i talk about mine. actually, it's a plot point in my book.

here's the difference: i recognize it's a fucking mental illness. i am very careful to never mention a specific weight, eating pattern, or calorie plan. i always make sure to position it as something that ruined my fucking life. i do not put cheery music in the background and hearts and sparkles over my worst moments. i do not film it in bright light. i do not start each passage with an image of a thin body followed by "here's how to look like her."

eating disorders should not be framed as aspirational. and the problem is that society worships the "after" image, so long as you don't get too sick. there is a reason so many people who quit being "influencers" will later admit - i wasn't eating well that whole time; an obsession with food was completely destroying my life.

we let any uncredited, uncertified person write the most backwards, fucked up shit about how to get the body you desire! because the underlying, secret belief is: well, at least they're thin! and the real thing that fucking gets me each time - they make fucking money off of it. their irresponsibility and societal harm literally pays off for them.

"why do you care so much." "don't like it don't look." "so what if people experiment with new ways of thinking of food?"

thank you for asking. we're about to get extremely personal. it's because when i was 18 i discovered "thinspiration"/"thinspo." and it absolutely influenced, shaped, and codified my pre-existing eating disorder. i went from having some troubling habits and traits to being incredibly unwell within what felt like a matter of days. there were actual pages designed to train me on how to have an ED correctly. it was all so suddenly easy. i was sick; and the nature of the illness meant - i wanted to be sicker.

it takes an average of 7 years for a person to fully recover. i know this personally - even now, 10 years from the worst of it, i still fucking struggle. i am so much happier now and i eat what i want and i literally don't think about food at all (19 year old me would shudder) and yet - i still fucking know the calories of plain toast with butter.

an eating disorder is one of the deadliest types of mental illness. over 1 in 4 people with an ED will attempt suicide.

and i'm sorry. i just do not see the exchange rate of "high rate of engagement" versus "the value of a human life."

[the-phoenix-heart]

hang on lemme cook. LEMME COOK

Okay so I've been thinking about the stolitz breakup since I watched it last night and the thing I keep thinking about is Stolas saying, "Blitzo, I think so very highly of you...I didn't realize you think so low of me." It is a painful line read, Bryce Pinkham at his very best. And in a way Stolas is right, the fact that Blitzo thinks Stolas would willfully manipulate and play with Blitzo's emotions is a low opinion to have of him. It also makes sense that he sends Blitzo away because he's yelling at him (even Blitzo's cadence sounds a bit like Stella). However, I think Stolas misunderstands where Blitzo is coming from.

We know Stolas is aware of the power dynamic between them, and specifically the transactional nature, and that he is aware that it is unhealthy. However, I think Stolas only understands that transactional part as the unhealthy bit. Stolas (in "Full Moon" and "Just Look My Way") focuses on the "unspoken contract" and how tethered they are to each other. He thinks by giving Blitzo the crystal and semi-confessing (Stolas never says the words "I love you") it means they will be on even ground and Blitzo won't feel like he has to whore himself out for Stolas's grimoire (something he needs for his business so he can live). Then Blitzo can actually choose to stay with him or not. But he doesn't understand that even without the grimoire there's the inherent power imbalance on the hell hierarchy level.

Stolas says in "Just Look My Way", "I don't care that you're of lower station" and that's because he doesn't. But that doesn't mean Stolas is an imp ally. Stolas has never indicated that Blitzo isn't just the exception. Just in this episode Stolas was seen making life harder for his imp butler, and then there's the scene in "Seeing Stars" where he is holding the imp butler holding the phone and squeezing him when he gets pissed. His interactions with Moxie and Millie also don't really make it seem like he cares that much about them as people. Blitzo isn't wrong when he calls out Stolas's treatment of his butlers, or when he says that Stolas was dismissing him in a way that felt disrespectful. Even him putting his hand in his face feels like how he would dismiss a servant.

Throughout the entire conversation Stolas is very cordial, very genuine, and very respectful of Blitzo's emotions-right up until he takes Blitzo's response as a rejection-but even then Stolas always has the power in the conversation. Even when he is being emotionally vulnerable, he is still the one controlling the conversation. He's the one stressing Blitzo out with it. Even when he gets on his knees to put the crystal on Blitzo's glove he is technically taking the choice away from Blitzo to choose it. And then his reaction to Blitzo thinking it's roleplay is that Blitzo really doesn't want him is to completely shutdown emotionally and not listen to Blitzo.

And Blitzo is not wrong for thinking it's about sex. Half of this is Blitzo convincing himself it's roleplay because he doesn't believe anybody could truly love him, but also when isn't it about sex with Stolas? The only times where it hasn't been was after Ozzie's when Stolas offers Blitzo to come inside (which Blitzo did not believe and did not react well to) and arguably the Harvest Moon Festival where Stolas invites him, which Blitzo honestly could have misconstrued as Stolas wanting to bring his sidepiece with him. You could also make the case for "Seeing Stars" but that episode has them falling back into horny during a mission they are both participating in. And as I pointed out in an earlier post how is Blitzo supposed to realize how highly Stolas views him? Stolas has called Blitzo his "impish plaything" and covered his face at Ozzie's and has generally been condescending to him ("You are so cute when you are serious"). We know that Stolas is desperately in love with Blitzo and would do anything for him, but Blitzo himself has never really gotten that confirmation.

Hell, Blitzo is actively doing what Stolas wanted. His reaction to Stolas's semi-confession by thinking it's roleplay is specifically proof that he does want to keep this up, even if he doesn't realize the feelings behind it. And then later he is specifically trying to have a conversation with Stolas and process what's going on ("Let's go!" As in "let's have this conversation!"). The fact that Stolas sends Blitzo away when he himself starts crying, when Blitzo has been on the verge of tears throughout most of this conversation proves that Stolas is not ready to have this uncomfortable conversation. He was only ready for Blitzo to either accept or reject him, and he thought that their issues would be fixed.

"Blitzo, I think so very highly of you...I didn't realize you think so low of me." No, it's not that he thinks so low of you, it's that he has almost only seen the outrageously horny part of you, that he's more aware of this power dynamic than you, and is rightfully calling you out for how you fumbled this confession. You clearly love Blitzo, you have the right idea, but you still have these inherent biases and are unaware of the power imbalance, and you need to reevaluate some things.

This isn't to absolve Blitzo of the part he played in the breakup, but since Stolas took the initiative and almost always people are more willing to take his side, I feel he needs to be held more accountable.

[solarpunkani]

I saw this on Twitter and honestly felt a bit sick just thinking about it. The sheer determination some people have to keep anyone from getting any sort of help, any sort of benefits, to kick down someone who has such a big heart to help those around her?

Here's the Tiktok where the woman, Carly Burd, talks about it. She shows the salted state of the land. This video was posted 21 hours ago at the time of posting this.

Another video where she discusses it, this one was posted 4 hours ago. Over 5 kilograms of salt, she estimates, was put into the soil of her allotment. She'd already planted onions and potatoes with her kids, which are now ruined. She's working to find a solution, which I genuinely hopes she does.

From what I can tell, this is a GoFundMe that she runs--not just for this tragic occurrence, but to generally support the work she does. It has a goal of £4,000 pounds and at the time of writing this, it's raised over £54,000 pounds, but by all means if you want to donate and help her out I'm sure she wouldn't turn any help away.

I genuinely hope all the help she's getting with this lets her grow a lot more food and help a lot more people.

[Photo ID: a scrrenshot of two tweets of a Twitter thread by Elsbeth Tashioni @THISisLULE, with 6,102 retweets, 2,345 Quote retweets, 28.1K likes, and 1,597 Bookmarks. The leading tweet was made at 4:24 AM EST on 4/12/23 (April 12th 2023). "Some UK woman on tiktok has been making videos about how she’s been feeding people (partly through an allotment) in her community who are struggling due to the cost of living crisis and then yesterday she posts that someone went and salted her land so she can’t grow food anymore" The second tweet has 25 replies, 1,391 retweets, and 14.5k likes. "Do you know how evil you have to be to sneak out at night, not to even steal to benefit yourself, but to destroy the possibility of people in need getting help?" End ID]

[front-facing-pokemon]