#i did not think as many people would read the arfid one as they did | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mieeaahhh · 3 months ago

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A really looonngggg list of the most useless and boring all for the game head-cannons

Characters:

Neil Josten

He has those two crooked teeth at the sides of his mouth that look like ‘fangs’ and big two front teeth (me too, me too😔)

Wears caps backwards like a freak loser weirdo

He doesn’t care much about facial piercings but he ends up getting a few more ear piercings after awhile (and then he got a tongue piercing because someone told him he wouldn’t)

Regularly walks into glass doors and poles by accident and tries to play it off and act cool when really he just looks like an absolute dumbass

Sneezes like an old man

He wakes up from nightmares sometimes thinking his legs are gone and panics before realising that he’s okay and that he’s safe

Curly mullet curly mullet curly mullet curly mullet

His mum did his ear piercings for him as another way to change his appearance

Once woke up from a nightmare and punched Andrew instead of Andrew waking up from a nightmare and punching him. Andrew had never woken up so confused in his life and Neil burst out laughing while apologising and he immediately forgot about what his nightmare was about

Andrew Minyard

Once he starts relaxing more while sleeping in the same bed as Neil he starts sleep talking and it’s always about something ridiculous or completely random

I’ve said this so many times but idc. Andrew didn’t have any piercings until he moved in with Aaron and Nicky because Aaron has piercings and Andrew thought they were cool

Is good at baking and enjoys it but if you held a gun to his head and told him to cook dinner the gun would go off

When he was a kid he was really into space and constellations and sometimes he’ll point them out while on the roof with Neil

Covers his mouth with his hand or turns his face away when he laughs

He has Arfid? I think that’s what it’s called

Hides away whenever he’s sick because as a child people have gotten angry at him for being sick as it was ‘inconvenient’.

Aaron Minyard

Has slight claustrophobia from when Andrew locked him inside the bathroom. It’s not that bad most of the time but sometimes if the door gets stuck for a second or he’s in a small room for too long then he silently freaks out (he also hates going inside lifts)

Was really big on dinosaurs as a kid. his favourite teddy was a little terradactyl (idfk how to spell it I’ve been trying for ten minutes😭) and he still keeps it under his pillow

Gives the most nastiest looks to people without even realising

Mumbles to himself a lot about the things he’s doing like a narrator

The type of person to not know where their glasses are when they are on top of their head

Whenever he does something that makes him think the person he’s with will get angry with him he either freezes or makes himself smaller

Aaron has a weird thing with being perceived and will often stop doing something (like reading or whatever) if someone sees him/walks in until they go away.

Kevin Day

He’s autistic but only got diagnosed when he was in the foxes (like a few months or so after Wymack finding out he’s his dad and stuff)

Scared if butterflies the same way people are scared of wasps and bees

Sleeps face down and snores really loudly but is in denial about it

He has a keyring that he carries around with him everywhere because he was going to give it to Jean but never got the chance and now he feels it’s a bit late to do it now

Has the most beautiful handwriting

Nicky Hemmick

Really long eyelashes

Had a really bad and embarrassing emo phase that he refuses to talk about but one time the twins found old photos of it and framed them to mess with him

Tongue and smiley piercing

He’s in a the family group chat Erik has with his family

Opening up about his personal problems is hard for him. He thinks that if he’s upset about something then people will get annoyed with him and he’s scared of being an inconvenience

Renee Walker

Dyes her hair to match the holidays

She’s transgender mtf

The first time she died her hair was after she was adopted by Stephanie. She messed it up and Stephanie had walked in on her trying to fix it and offered to help her. It was one of the first things they really did together as mother and daughter

She always stands with her hands clasped together either in-front or behind her

She always has unique/fun hair-clips in her hair

Allison Reynolds

When she’s anxious about something she kinda just rubs her hands together or rubs them across her neck or legs repetitively

She LOVESSS shopping but always enjoys it more when someone is with her (it normally ends up being Neil, Seth or Renee)

Hips + bellybutton pierced🙌

When she was a kid she refused to wear anything but princess dress costumes and tiaras for like two years

A lot of her clothes/accessories or glittery or shimmery but she actually hates glitter because of how inconveniently messy it is

Kisses peoples cheeks to greet them

Matt Boyd

He’s the type of hugger that lifts up whoever it is he’s hugging (Aaron, Dan and Neil are victims of unexpectedly being lifted of the ground and seeing their life flash before their eyes)

Will, has and still does break it down to Brittney spear’s whenever she comes on

He has a tattoo on his hand on a flower and a tattoo on his shoulder of his exy number

He wanted to get both his eyebrows pierced but chickened out after getting the first one done

His favourite animal is a crocodile and has been since he was a little boy. His childhood toy was a teddy crocodile that he still keeps on his bed

Dan Wilds

The foxes all got Wymack a Father’s Day mug with their names signed on it once. It was Dans idea and it was a moustache on the bottom of it

She LOVES maximalist gold jewellery and is covered in it most of the time

During and after her time with the foxes she keeps in touch with her old work sisters and does secret Santa with them every year

Nose freckles nose freckles nose freckles

The teams ‘bonding’ activities are normally planned by her

Seth Gordan

He has dyslexia but is in denial about it and pretends he doesn’t know what dyslexia is��

He is absolutely COVERED in freckles

He’s wanted to be a professional Exy player since he was a kid and it’s always what he’d tell people he was going to be before he joined the foxes. He lost hope in becoming one after signing with the team (kinda canon lmao?)

He looks the most like his father out of all his siblings

David Wymack

Proper BAWLED his eyes out at Dan and Matts wedding. It was the first time any of the foxes had seen him cry and they thought it was hilarious

Doesn’t know how to work a phone and holds it far away from his face like an old lady to read messages

Has a moustache🫡🤤😍🥰😘

Had an eyebrow piercing as a teenager but took it out YEARS ago

Abby Winfield

Was like super goth as a teenager

Has a tongue piercing and is a FAKE BLONDE🫵

Her only friend growing up was Betsy

Has a raspy voice🤤🤤

Betsy Dobson

Her style is very colourful and maximalist. She wears funky jewellery, crazy accessories and patterned tights, etc

She enjoys crocheting from time to time

She had a crush on Abby when they were in school with each other

Jeremy Knox

Big front teeth like a rabbit

Cries during sad movies. Like full on heaving sobs

Was very very shy as a kid and didn’t have many friends before the Trojans

He’s never really been aloud to do do things like dying his hair, dressing how he wants, going out more than a day a week if he was lucky, getting piercings etc etc so he’s honestly kind of afraid of being himself and a part of him still doesn’t really know who he is

Frecklesssss

A haver of the OCD🫡

Really bad at hiding his facial expressions. If you’re annoying him you WILL know about it but he won’t know that you know🧍

Jean Moreau

Moles EVERYWHERE

Sometimes he has days so bad that he struggles to even drink water because it feels like he’s choking

He’s very fidgety. Never sitting still for too long and whenever he’s holding something he’s always playing around with it in his hands. He fidgets very subtlety as he can though because he doesn’t want people to notice it

His favourite films are the buddy’s films

Absolutely SUCKS at any kind of game, board games, card games, video games etc he’s ridiculously bad at them

The toaster gives him a fright every single time it pops. Even when he pops it himself with the button

Resting sad face

Katelyn Mackenzie

She’s one of the cheerleaders that get thrown up in the air (I don’t know anything about cheerleading it isn’t really a thing where I live)

Her hair is really really curly and long

She’s the oldest sibling of four and the youngest is adopted

She’s always been quite popular amongst her peers growing up because of how kind, helpful and friendly she was but she’s never really had a best friend until the vixens (I like to think her best friend is a really goth girl in the cheer team)

Her part time job as a teenager was babysitting and she LOVED it

She’s 5,11

Groups:

The Monsters

They have a group-chat but they don’t really use it

Have all just fallen asleep in the car outside of Eden’s instead of driving home by accident a lot

They don’t take photos with each other but Nicky has taken sooooo many sneaky photos of them all

When Robin joins the foxes and eventually joins the monsters they all treat her as if she’s their little sister and her parents have invited them all for tea/dinner a few times

Kevin and Aaron are the only ones that can’t drive

Had a karaoke night once and have all agreed to never ever speak of it again

Once Andrew sorts his shit out Katelyn joins them in their outings sometimes

The upperclassmen

Go out for dinner together quite a lot

Were all bridesmaids/groomsmen at each-others weddings

They’ve got a group chat that is still used years after graduation even though they are all busy with their own lives now

They do those hangout things when they all make a PowerPoints about whatever they want and present it to each other etc yk?

They all have matching tattoos of their exy numbers

On the anniversary of Seth's death, the foxes and Wymack gather at Abby's place to have dinner together. They don't really talk about him but they leave one seat empty.

The floozies

They have BBQS together a lot

All have some sort of matching thing like a bracelet or t-shirt I just can’t think of what it would be lol

Cat and Laila have a photo wall/photo album full of photos of them all

They are always helping Jean have fun experiencing things he never got the chance too. He probably won’t tell them directly but he appreciates their patience

Kevin being obsessed with them is a bit of an inside joke of theirs. “Hey guys do you think I look okay in this?” “No but u know who would!” “If you say Kevin I’m punching you in the fucking face” (???) idk how else to demonstrate that LMAO

Love love love having sleepovers at Cat and Lailas

The Vixens

They were all weary of Katelyn’s boyfriend being Aaron grumpy loser pants Minyard but they eventually warmed up to him

When Melissa/Marissa(?) first joined the vixens after being in the foxes she struggled fitting in with everyone. Katelyn was the first friend she made on the team

Most of them are probably the nicest people you will meet in Palmetto and couldn’t care less about the foxes but a lot of them absolutely despise the foxes and want nothing to do with them

Katelyn has her own little group of friends in the vixens who Aaron eventually joined and is now the main source of their gossip (he mainly bitches about Neil and Andrew)

They all absolutely ADORE Robin

Relationships/couples (cannon and not lol):

Andrew and Neil

Andrew runs cold and has to sleep like he’s hibernating for the winter while Neil runs hot and needs a fan (Andrew hates the fan. It is enemy #1)

The cats were Andrews ‘idea’. (He found them outside and took them home without saying anything)

Neil has had to carry drunk andrew a few times because Andrew likes being difficult

The team all have AT LEAST one photo of them sleeping together . On the couch, in the bus, in their bed, ON THE ROOF? They all have one

Andrew enjoys shopping and has a wardrobe full to the brim with clothes. Neil just wears Andrews clothes most of the time

Andrew sits on Neil’s lap more than Neil sits on his but Neil LOVES holding Andrew’s hand

They bake together sometimes but it usually just ends up with them throwing flour at each-other (poor Andrews completely black outfits)

They both actually get ‘flustered’ quite easily around each-other but with Neil it’s literally Impossible to tell. Andrews entire face goes red but that’s IT

Andrew paints Neil’s nails sometimes when he’s bored (it’s obviously black nail varnish too)

Andrew let’s Neil pin his hands,eventually, enjoying being safe in his hold

Aaron and Katelyn

Katelyn is the big spoon🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Katelyn enjoys baking but Aaron doesn’t so he is always just sitting on the counter and watching her bake

Aaron is a lot quieter/more insecure than Katelyn is so she’ll often be the one in control of the conversation whether it’s just them two or a group of people but Aaron is a lot more comfortable being himself when he’s with just her (Their a Sunshine and rain cloud basically🙄)

Katelyn’s parents ADORE Aaron

Aaron buys flowers for Katelyn every single time he comes over to see her. When they get a home together he buys her new flowers every week

Katelyn is a big kisser while Aaron is a big hugger

Katelyn always kisses Aaron repeatedly on the face when she’s trying out new lipstick (leaving him covered in lipstick marks how adorbs and lovely)

They are both very physically affectionate with eachother

Katelyn takes 0.5 photos of Aaron all the time trust

Dan and Matt

Matching pajamas🙏🙌🗣️

Randy absolutely loves Dan and is constantly going on about how lucky her son is and how beautiful Dan is etc etc

Matt is the type of guy to wear a t-shirt covered in pictures of dans face at the club or a “I <3 my GF” shirt

They do face masks together during movie nights

Matt absolutely WORSHIPS Dan and it’s so painfully sweet it causes tooth aches

They go on a date once a week after graduation

Wymack walked Dan down the isle at their wedding and was absolutely SOBBING while dancing was giggling at him

Matt doesn’t know how to tie a tie because he’s got hashtag daddy issues so Dan usually does it for him

Always touching somehow. Shoulder to shoulder, hand in hand etc

Seth and Allison

He liked her bossing him around👁️👁️

Sometimes when they were bored Seth would try do Alison’s makeup and she wasn’t aloud to help him and it always ended up with them cry laughing

Allison would help Seth shave his head when it got too long for him

Allison had Seth saved as “wife🏳️‍🌈” in her contacts LMFAO

After he died the foxes photo wall had a photo of him put up with his name and birth to death dates. Allison is the one who picked the photo

Allison always manhandled Seth into doing his skincare and eyebrows etc because she was NOT going to have a scruff as a boyfriend (he secretly enjoyed it)

He liked it when she scratched his back because of her long fake nails

She was the first real girlfriend Seth had (and the last)

Allison and Renee

Allison helps Renee dye her hair when Andrew isn’t around to help (sometimes they both help her at the same time)

Renee is silently a little shy around Allison and gets flustered at all the compliments and praise Allison gives her (Allison is head over heels and is very very much flustered but she can’t let people know that🙄🙄)

^They are basically just very awkwardly sweet with eachother

Allison always ricks Renee’s hair behind her ears

They go on picnic dates a lot during summer and spring

Renee fell first, Allison fell harder🫡

Stephanie is the embarrassing type of mother that’s always teasing her kid about their crush and she most definitely teased Renee about Allison

Renee makes homemade valentines gifts and Allison gets expensive valentines gifts

Allison loves Renee playing with her hair

Renee enjoys taking off Allison makeup for her at the end of the day and always kisses the tip of her nose when she’s done (taking the fake eyelashes off is her favourite part LMAO)

Allison has gone to church with Renee and Stephanie a few times during Christmas

Allison always kisses Renee’s wing tattoo

Renee reads before bed a lot and Allison falls asleep listening to her sometimes

Renee and Allison and Seth (hear me out I’m begging)

Renee and Seth are both dating Allison but they are not dating each-other 🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️

They are both very playful competitive when it comes to Allison and she thinks it’s hilariously sweet

They have a groupchat named “Renee is cooler” and Seth is a dumbass who doesn’t know how to change the name

After Seth died Allison and Renee stopped dating for a while. Allison needed some time to herself and Renee was okay with that

Renee and Seth are low-key best friends (obviously! they have the same girlfriend) but pretend to be enemies in a way that’s like almost as if they are at war against each-others kingdom LMAO

They all go on dates together but they also take turns going on dates

Seth helped allison help dye Renee’s hair once and accidentally got the dye in his and Allison hair. He was never aloud to help again

Allison sleeps in the middle and they rotate the spooning lmao. One night Seth spoons Allison while Allison spoons Renee and another night it’ll be the other way around. Sometimes they are both just curled into Allison 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Stephanie loves both Allison and Seth and often invited them over for dinner

They all had matching banquet outfits

Jeremy and Jean

Jeremy kisses jeans moles/Beauty marks and Jean kisses Jeremy’s freckles

They sleep facing each-other and so close that they are basically kissing 🙄

Jeremy likes playing with jeans hands when they cuddle and kisses his finger tips

Jeremy screams and runs from bugs while Jean picks them up and puts them outside

Nicky and Eric

At their wedding Nicky was walked down the aisle by Erik’s dad

Their first date was an aquarium date and it was also Nicky’s first time going to an aquarium

They have matching build-a-bears

When Nicky first moved back to take in the twins he and Erik called almost every single night. Nicky was so tired sometimes that he’d fall asleep while Erik was speaking

Nicky only taught the twins basic greetings and manners in German so that when they meet Erik they could at least greet each other but the twins learnt it fluently in their own time without Nicky knowing

Abby and Wymack

They got legally married but instead of a wedding they had a dinner party at their house

They cook together almost every night (Abby is cooking and Wymack is TRYING to cook)

They go on a date every Friday night if they can

They are both very private about their relationship and keep to themselves instead of parading their love around for everyone to see

Abby helps Wymack shave most of the time because he #sucks

They have a daughter together sometime in the future (probably wouldn’t happen but idc😒) and Kevin is her best friend. He buys presents and spoils her whenever he comes to visit

She also absolutely adores Dan and Matt

Katelyn and Aaron and Kevin

Aaron and Katelyn are messy sleepers and move around A LOT so Kevin has woken up from being kicked in the face or something an ridiculous amount of times

Aaron kisses Kevin’s hands and Katelyn’s head/hair a lot, Kevin kisses Aaron’s forehead and katelyns shoulders a lot, then Katelyn kisses Aaron’s cheeks and Kevin’s forehead a lot

Katelyn and Aaron wear eachother and Kevin’s clothes a lot but Kevin barely wears theirs because most of it’s too small for him

Katelyn taught them both how to plait hair and sometimes when they are bored she’ll sit on the floor infront of them while they plait one side each and whoever does the best plait wins

They had a shared playlist but Kevin was banned from adding songs to it because his music taste is bad

Cat and Laila

Bicker like an old married couple

Matching outfits AND hair for banquets but Laila has really long hair and cat has short hair so they are not always FULLY matching hairstyles

Just have a lot of matching things like pajamas and jewellery etc

Sometimes when it’s just them home they play music and slow dance in the kitchen/sitting room quietly

Cat is an ‘organised mess’ kinda person while laila is just a messy person

Friendships/Family:

Katelyn and Neil

Bully Aaron every chance they get bro trust🙏 “look at him” “ikr what a nerd” “I can hear you both😐”

Katelyn is just messing around but Neil is probably actually bullying him LMFAO

Dressed up as each other for Halloween once without telling anybody and gave the twins whip lash

Neil helps her with maths and will help Aaron too if he’s there but Aaron is actually good at maths so he doesn’t need it most of the time

Katelyn was watching when Marissa was asking for Neil’s number because she was the one that told her to ‘go for it!’ And when Marissa got back Katelyn was in tears laughing

They have a secret hand shake that is unnecessarily complicated

Katelyn has bright ginger hair while Neil (cannonicly) had Auburn/dark ginger hair

Aaron and Matt

Aaron was a little awkward about their slowly forming friendship and often tried pushing Matt away but Matt was a little oblivious to it

Randy loved Aaron and always tells Matt to invite him over for the holidays

Whenever Aaron has a nightmare he doesn’t like sleeping by himself and has woken up next to Matt many times because Matt told him he can just sleep in his bed if it makes him feel better

They get really competitive with each other over video games

They play fight/tackle eachother at the most random times and Matt usually wins

Matt had a pair of Spider-Man pajama bottoms and Aaron has a pair of Batman pajama bottoms (Matt bought them)

Matt was the best man at Aaron and Katelyn’s wedding

Matt is Aaron’s first ever best friend

Neil and Matt

Matt gets Neil into playing video games with him sometimes and Neil is wayyyyy better than Matt so he regrets ever letting Neil have a go

There is a photo taped to the photo wall of Neil sitting on matts shoudlers with the biggest smile on his face because he’s laughing and doing this 💪😆💪 LMAO matts doing 💪😁 because he has to hold Neil with his other hand

Matt always holds his hand up high when giving Neil a high five so Neil has to jump to high five him back

Andrew and Neil are the designated babysitters for the team (when they aren’t working obviously) and matt and dans son is constantly copying them and the things they say

Matt insists on them having ‘bro nights’ at least once a week

Matt is Andreils biggest fan

They have a bromance so strong you’d think their actually inlove with each other sometimes, Dan thinks it’s hilarious (Andrew does too but they can’t know that🙄🙄)

Dan, Allison, Renee (+Katelyn!)

Renee, Allison and Dan have girls nights and slumber parties sometimes and after awhile they start inviting Katelyn

When Renee was re-dying her hair once Allison asked her to put pink and black underneath the blonde but she only kept it for a year (Mcbing Allison🫡)

Allison and Katelyn gossip like nobody ever could, they know everything and everyone bro

Dressed up as the powerpuff girls for Halloween once

Aaron, Andrew and Nicky

Nicky was the one that bought Andrew his armbands. Nicky took them shopping for some extra things like clothes and school supplies etc before they went home and Andrew picked them up, Nicky saw him looking at them and told him he can get them if he wants (Nicky never knew why Andrew wanted them until thanksgiving)

Nicky cut the twins hair for them up until the left collage. To begin with it was just Aaron’s hair he did but eventually Andrew trusted him enough for him to cut his too (I don’t think Andrew would like a hairdressers due to a stranger having to touch him and I just think Aaron would hate getting his hair cut)

They had movie nights together before collage every now and again but didn’t have the time for them once they joined the foxes. One night, after the books take place, Nicky asked if the wanted to have one and they ended up meeting in Aaron’s dorm to watch it. Aaron fell asleep against Nicky’s shoulder and while Andrew fell asleep last at the other side of their make shift sofa bed thing

Aaron and Nicky met once or twice when they were little but Aaron doesn’t remember

They have a groupchat and Nicky has the twins contacts saved as ‘thing 1’ and ‘thing 2’

A part of Nicky was upset Andrew never told him he was gay and at some point he asked him if it was because he felt like he couldn’t and Andrew looked him up and down and asked if he was being serious LMAO

Aarons had glasses since he was little but Andrew only got his after moving in with Nicky

Aaron and Andrew eventually just end up sharing most of their clothes either each other after awhile

andrew and aaron both have a very contagious laugh if you’re lucky enough to hear it

Allison, Renee, Neil and Andrew

DOUBLE DATES GUYS TRUST🙏🙏🙏 I think Renee and Allison are more of a dinner date kind of couple while Neil are a staying in or like going on a drive type of couple so they all agree on something that they would all like. a small café or something yk?

Andrew doesn’t gossip but will slide Allison information he’s heard, Renee doesn’t gossip and doesn’t particularly enjoy listening to it, Neil doesn’t gossip but he’ll listen if Allison is, Allison loves gossip and looses her mind when she’s with them

Renee and Andrew have a video of neil and Allison doing karaoke and dancing while drunk in the dorms but nobody else knows about them (not even Neil and Allison)

Allison and Andrew are the best gift givers on the team🫡

Allison put glam makeup on Neil once for fun and the look and Andrews face had them in stitched laughing

I think it would be cute if Allison and Renee adopted a daughter in the future and she would LOVE Andrew and Neil and always want them to ‘come over and play’

^^^Andrew always lets her get away with everything. “Do you want some..?” “My mums said I can’t have sweets before dinner😞” “well they aren’t here right now and I say you can”

Allison and Andrew eventually end up becoming somewhat friends after awhile and she paints his nails for him a lot because she claims he’s ’bad at it’

Neil and Allison

She drags him along for shopping sprees a lot and often ends up buying him clothes even though he has the money for his own

^^^when she and Andrew get closer, there will be a few times she’ll be looking, pick something up and go “you’re buying this for Andrew” and shove it into Neil’s hands

She and Neil have matching skincare headbands/hair-clips

Allison made all Neil’s social media accounts and showed him how to change things like his profile info and how to post. All he’s ever EVER posted is a selfie he has with Allison, a picture of Andrew + the cats and a group photo of the foxes

^^^something similar to this (yes I know that’s the Yellowjackets cats but just imagine it’s the foxes instead LMAO)

She used him as a model when making clothes sometimes (she used Renee as one too🤭��)

she made him try do her makeup once and he put the fake eyelashes on her eyebrows

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bubbleslimesoda · 1 year ago

Text

Sharing My Story

Trigger Warning for mentions of: Eating disorders, abuse, emotional blackmail, self harm, threats of suicide, sexual assault, physical assault, racism, homophobia/bigotry ideals and manipulation

^Please only read if you have read the warning!^

I’ve been wanting to talk about this for some times as it has been so many years and yet I still get PTSD from this.

When I was 15-16 I was in a relationship with someone I’ll just call ‘that guy’/‘guy’ (I don’t even want to give him a creative name). I will also specify that he is the same age as me although when I started dating him I was told by a doctor that my mental age was apparently “half my actual age”.

Now I can’t even remember how this relationship started because to me it felt like “Oh we’ve been hanging out for a long time, I guess we’re going out now” also just to make it clear I had only been in one other relationship before this one and I’d felt the same way, I currently identify as grey aro/ace although I still question myself on it.

And a small detail about before this relationship, I had actually witnessed ‘that guy’ grab a half full bottle of water and hold a student while repeatedly hitting them really really hard with it, idk why at the time I didn’t see this as a red flag but then again I was about 14-15.

In this relationship at first I was told to be quiet about it unless I’d expressed how it made me feel sad as I was to feel like ‘that guy’ was ashamed of me for some reason.

I don’t want to go into full detail of every single thing that happened as it was very traumatic so the less I think about it the better. I’m going to make a list of things that happened instead.

• Kicked me in the head

• Hit me on my lower back

• Pulled my arm so hard my shoulder was in pain for a few weeks

• Bullied my ex and tried to convince me that my ex assaulted me

• Told me that I was “practically a boy” because I was bi (I wasn’t at the time) and that he was a girl because he was bi (Just pointing out how he seems to associate someone’s sexually with their gender identity)

• Would start an argument if I show little discomfort/felt upset by something he did or said

• Said he would kill my favourite tv show characters if he got the chance (I’m autistic and I think you can see why telling an autistic teen this is pretty fucked up)

• Made fun of and got angry at me for my autistic traits such as not liking loud sounds, bright lights and repetitive sounds and motion

• Referred to my eating disorder, ARFID as “being a picky eater” and when I expressed it upset me he showed no remorse and said he was “just joking”

• Putting words in my mouth. For example if he asked “Why would someone suddenly be acting different?” And I would reply “Idk. A big change in their life, loss of someone close, drugs, alcohol, into something new, money?” He would turn around say I was accusing him of doing drugs (I really don’t know how he would make those stretches)

• Manipulated me into acting in a way that was more sexual than what I was comfortable with

• Would then tell me off for said behaviour but then would make remarks or show disinterest in me when I stopped

• Touched me without permission or while I was asleep even though I had expressed discomfort or even said no (I would wake up from it or have noticeable signs of it when I woke up)

• Made jokes about Asian people’s eyes

• Isolated me from friends and made it so I could only be friends with his friends

• Threats of self harm and taking his own life when he wouldn’t get his way

I know that was long and thank you if you’ve read this far. This is very hard for me to write as I keep needing to take breaks to calm myself down.

When I was 15-16 I was very into Rick and Morty and I suggested it to ‘that guy’ since I genuinely thought he would like it. He said we’d watched it before but I pointed out that he was never paying attention to which he just seemed to flip out about. I told him it wasn’t going to work to which he threatened self harm and worse so I agreed to stay with him. The next day he then “broke up with me” as far as I was concerned it had already ended when I said it wasn’t going to work but we still tried to be friends.

After that I had so many nice and kind people come back into my life which I was a very emotional thing for me because it felt like I was asleep or cut off from reality before hand. It seemed that the rest of the school knew about ‘guy’s’ behaviour as no one wanted to talk to him or be friends with him after everything, we could just stand in this corner staring at me and my friends while texting as we spent our breaks talking and such.

A few days after it happened I was sat with my friends and suddenly got a call from my mum saying that ‘guy’s’ parents had called her saying that I had been bullying him to which I had to point out that no, I wasn’t bullying him. I was just sitting with my friends and talking while ‘that guy’ was staring at us in a corner.

After that I did my exams and went to college only to find out that ‘guy’ had copied me on what course I was taking, I had actual helped him get into a different course to me but he still decided to take the course I was taking.

Now I did try to be civil, I didn’t acknowledge him or talk about him/to him until he asked if we could be friends(I was 16 at the time btw, I’m the UK you go to college at about 16 and then uni after about 3 years). I foolishly said yes.

One day my friend who I’d met in that course who had ME was going to be late and was worried about being seated near someone who kept messaging them about drinking and made them uncomfortable. I had a different class before our one so I asked ‘that guy’ if he could save them a seat and he said no which I was fine with but then he went on to say that I was “bullying him by asking him to save them a seat” and after I told him that’s not how it worked he said “I wouldn’t let him be bi while we were dating”, I was actually very supportive and happy for him during that time. I told him repeatedly to leave me alone and blocked him.

Now for this last bit I’m going to go back about it. Before we started dating he was dating another girl who had left our school due to depression and I was actually close with her and I was very sad and worried when she left. Idk how they broke up but the girl was at my college and I was so relieved and happy that she was okay I went to say hello to her. She screamed at me and I went home that day because someone had told me that ‘guy’ had “told everyone I abused him”(I also found out that she started dating ‘guy’), this was so overwhelming and upsetting that it is actually what started my PTSD.

Despite what I had managed to survive, doing the right thing by not talking to him or about him (apart from to two close friends at the time) and worrying about someone for years who I had no contact with I was now being accused of this horrible horrible thing that I had to live through. I even struggled to stand properly that day because of how scared, breathless and distraught I felt. I had even become terrified of saying his name because that’s how much hearing or saying it would fill me with fear.

They were reported and felt with for what had happened but for the rest of the year ‘guy’ and his girlfriend harassed and bullied me and they even harassed my mother at certain points. It was the worst first year of college I think anyone could’ve had and I would never wish it on anyone.

After that I went into the next year being in a different group to him(it’s also where I met my current best friend)and then the following year the groups merged but it seemed he didn’t have any friends again and I had actually made friends with some of the people he told I was abusive. One even said while I was helping them at their house “I’m sorry that I believed him, you’re actually really sweet and nice” which felt amazing to hear after all that trauma.

Today I still suffer with really bad PTSD attacks related to what happened before and during that first year of college. I guess I get paranoid that maybe the same thing will happen again somehow in the future so making this post is my way of venting about this, and bringing awareness to it as I know I’m not the only one who has been abused only to have that person tell you “it’s your fault” or “you’re actually the abusive one” despite having had to deal with similar or even the same thing as me. And people like ‘that guy’ will always be around trying to snake their way back into your life just to hurt you or make themselves a victim just so they don’t have to feel bad about what they did to you.

To finish this off I want to sort of say what I would to my younger self, dealing with what happened.

I’m sorry I wasn’t able to protect you and I’m sorry that you suffered. From the bottom of my heart and everything I am, I am sorry. You deserve better than what happened to you and don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise. I know you put yourself down a lot but you are going to make some amazing things and meet amazing people who love you and care for you. Don’t let this hold you back, you are more than this horrible thing that happened to you so don’t let it consume you. You are loved and capable of so much. Don’t ever stop being your happy silly and imaginative self, I love that side of you and I will not stop loving you. Please take care of yourself.

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kaminocasey · 2 months ago

Note

Random Ask 🌺

Hi love, I hope you’re having a great day! I love getting random asks!! I hope you don’t mind them? 😅🤍

1. What is your favorite time of day?

2. One pet peeve?

3. What is your favorite genre of music?

4. What does a day in your life look like?

5. Dream Job?

6. (If you want any) How many children do you want?

7. (If you’ve been to one) Favorite concert you’ve ever been to? Or one you’d recommend?

8. A band you want to see in concert?

9. Favorite snacks?

10. Something you’d change if you could go back in the time?

11. (If you are a parent) give us a name that was almost your child’s name?

12. What’s a girl name that you love? And a boy name?

13. One food you absolutely refuse to eat?

14. Favorite scent?

15. What are you currently doing?

16. Do you love or hate cleaning?

17. What is your least favorite house “chore”

18. Favorite Season?

19. Current Obsession?

20. Longest Relationship so far?

21. When is your Birthday?

22. What do you do on a typical Friday night?

23. Are you afraid of the dark?

24. One goal you want to accomplish this year?

25. When you think of home, what comes to mind?

26. If you could ask one person a question and they had to be 100% honest who would you ask and what would you ask them?

27. Describe yourself in 3 words?

28. One thing people always misunderstood about you?

29. Do you believe in second chances?

30. What was the best phase in your life? What was the worst phase of your life?

Forgive me, this has been in my inbox since May but I've been absent from tumblr for some months and am just now getting back into things!! Thank you for this kind ask!! I'm always afraid of talking about myself too much so please forgive me if I don't answer some of these! <3

1. What is your favorite time of day? I'd have to say evening. It's when I get a moment to myself lol.

2. One pet peeve? People being rude to like waitresses/waiters/people working in customer service.

3. What is your favorite genre of music? Indie!

5. Dream Job? Being an author or bookseller (which I am lol)

7. (If you’ve been to one) Favorite concert you’ve ever been to? Or one you’d recommend? I've only been to three concerts in my life lol. Al Green, Arctic Monkeys, and Iron Maiden lol. (AM was my fav)

8. A band you want to see in concert? I'm gonna sound so lame but I'm not a big concert goer, just bc of anxiety lol.

9. Favorite snacks? I love wavy lays rn!

10. Something you’d change if you could go back in the time? Finishing college probably.

13. One food you absolutely refuse to eat? I'm pretty sure I have ARFID soooo there's too many lol.

14. Favorite scent? Vanilla or any sort of Ocean Breeze

15. What are you currently doing? Writing!

16. Do you love or hate cleaning? Mixed feelings lol.

17. What is your least favorite house “chore” Dusting lol. (yay allergies)

18. Favorite Season? Fall/Winter

19. Current Obsession? Spider-Man lol. (Mostly Miguel O'Hara and Peter B. Parker)

21. When is your Birthday? August 6!

22. What do you do on a typical Friday night? Read, write, watch movies!

23. Are you afraid of the dark? Lil bit!

24. One goal you want to accomplish this year? I wanted to Meet Hayden Christensen and I did!

#asks #anons

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rawbins-undertale-blog · 3 years ago

Note

This is a slight TW question, so feel no obligation to answer:

How would horrortale Sans react to an S/O with an eating disorder?

TW for eating disorder(s) (nearly only ARFID is spoken about, anorexia is mentioned)

If I missed any tags you think I should've included, please tell me.

This may sound a bit strange, but I’ve actually been wanting to write something for this, specifically because I suffer from an eating disorder. I’m not comfortable writing anything with an eating disorder (or any disorder in general) I personally don’t have, mostly because I don’t have the time to give it the proper research it deserves, so I’ll be writing about a lesser known eating disorder, that being ARFID. Let me explain it so people who don’t know what it is will, uh, know what it is lol

ARFID - also commonly called “Selective Eating Disorder” - stands for Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder. A lot of people with it are characterised as being “picky eaters”, but it goes to a point where it’s seriously unhealthy and crosses a line that makes it into something more serious. It has to do with sensory processing issues, rather than self-image issues (though self-image issues could also play a part in it I'm pretty sure, but it’s not the main “motivation”). Most people with ARFID actually wish they could go up in weight, but can’t because they can’t make themselves eat. I, for one, desperately wish I could just eat like a normal person, both because it’s very… not convenient to only have around 20 or less meals I can eat (and that list is slimming down as I grow tired of my safe foods*) and also I’m skinny enough to match Papyrus in looks, which isn’t very confidence-inspiring when you’re supposed to be a human and not a sentient magical skeleton, believe it or not. Whereas a person without ARFID could eat most things, including things they don’t really enjoy eating, somebody with ARFID might not be physically able to. For example, I literally throw up food that I don’t like (and I’ve gagged while eating food I do like due to seeing somebody eat something I don’t like and/or just smelling other food nearby). When I'm to try a new food, I have on more than one occasion gotten anxiety attacks. That’s how bad it can be.

*a "safe food" is food you know you can eat without panicking/throwing up/getting triggered in one way or another

I’ll be basing these HCs off of myself, so keep that in mind. You’re free to point out misinformation (and I, in fact, encourage you to point it out if I somehow got something wrong) but I ask that you stay respectful and don’t make fun of this. I doubt it would happen, but this topic means a lot to me and is really serious. So yeah please don’t be rude or invalidate people. Anyways onto the headcanons (which aren’t in the usual format, sorry if that bothers you)

Dusk (HT Sans) wouldn’t really understand. He’s able to eat pretty much anything (not like he had much of a choice for a while) and food is important… But he’ll try to understand. Especially because he can accommodate you. He’ll be fine eating the same meals, however “boring” they are, over and over because like I said: not a picky eater. Any food is good in his book. So long as you’re not restricting him and his food intake and so long as you aren’t dying from starvation and/or malnutrition, you’re free to do whatever.

It does annoy him when you go to social gatherings and you can’t eat the food because it’s not one of your safe foods. He’s not going to let you just starve yourself when there’s perfectly fine food just waiting for you. Not gonna lie, he’s pretty insensitive the first time this happens. Basically, he’ll pull you over when he notices you’re not eating anything and try to convince you to eat. Starts out really gentle and encouraging, but when you don’t budge he becomes increasingly agitated and insistent until he hisses that you’re making a fuss over nothing. Needless to say, you aren’t thrilled and it starts a pretty serious argument that probably ends with you either leaving, starting to cry or blowing up at him. He feels bad when it’s all said and done and apologises, because he realises after some thought that he wasn’t being helpful and he decided to do more research again. Even if he forgot it all like he did the first time he tried researching ARFID, it would have been worth a shot. After that, he’ll instead pack food with him for you whenever you go somewhere. It doesn’t matter if it’s “socially acceptable”, because like I said, you’re not starving if he’s got something to do with it.

He’ll also, after coming around to realise the best he can do to help you isn’t trying to push you out of your comfort zone forcefully, try to make sure there’s always at least one of your safe foods available. Don’t get me wrong though, he’ll still encourage you to expand on your list of safe foods. He’s got memory issues so he sometimes forgets, which he feels really bad about, but he has multiple alarms set to make sure you eat properly for the most part. (He’s got an alarm for nearly every minute of the day and he has his calendar full of things as mundane as “make sure s/o eats” and “do laundry”, by the way.) I have a tendency to skip lunch because I simply don’t like food, but he’d put a stop to that lol

To summarize, the whole thing with you having an ED starts off with the two of you having a rocky start before Dusk comes around to be really good at handling it.

Anyways sorry if you meant an ED like anorexia. I know most people write about things like that, but like I said: I’m not really up for writing things that I have to pour hours of research into to make sure I portray it respectfully and accurately because I don’t have that time or patience. (Or attention span, tbh.) Also, I literally hadn’t heard of ARFID for like… the majority of my life, I’ve only known it’s a “thing” for like. A few months. I really thought I was the only one who was so picky with my food and it made me feel alone and isolated (ESPECIALLY after I went to a "specialist" (not sure if she was actually a specialist anymore because her technique to get me to eat was to give my a small glass that I'd pour sauce into to try it every time it was served which obviously didn't work lmao) to help me when I was like six and she said she’d “never seen somebody this bad” before not giving me a diagnosis (as far as I know)), so if anybody with undiagnosed ARFID is reading this:

you're not alone. I know it’s difficult to deal with this - it can be humiliating and embarrassing and horrible and terrible in so many ways - but you can do it. It’s so hard, so fucking hard to step out of your comfort zone and try to expand on your list of safe foods, but you can do it. I believe in you. You aren’t alone and you can learn to have a healthier diet, please just try. I’ll be honest in that you’re probably never going to completely overcome this, ARFID is something that likely stays with you forever, but you can make it into a smaller problem. You can turn it into something so much smaller and inconsequential that you won't encounter any more embarrassing situations where you can't eat what you're given. To a point where you won't have to use the excuses "I already ate", "I'm not hungry", etc anymore. It’ll take time and patience, but you can do it. Don’t give up, okay? <3

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demonboidies · 5 years ago

Text

𝓼𝓲𝓬𝓴𝓵𝔂 - 𝓽𝓸 𝓴𝓷𝓸𝔀

pt. 3

word count: 1, 802

●WARNING: mention of several mental illnesses (eating disorders, depression, anxiety, psychotic disorders, OCD, alcohol abuse, and more) I do not go into deep detail of each, more so simply mentioning the names, but if you are easily triggered please don't read. the reason I am mentioning these illnesses is because the boys(in my ff) suffer from several of them. all the mental illnesses mentioned in this chapter and their corresponding member are not based on true facts or actual evidence. this is fictional.●

"ah, well i graduated from college a while ago. majored in world language, i had this crazy dream of being a translator. but i obviously don't do that, although i've recently applied to several companies, i haven't heard from any." you ended with a neutral smile, making eye contact with the oldest who was nodding in understanding. "but i asked Jungkook which classes he took, since he still is a youngling."

you chuckle at your wording, along with the others. Hoseok even ruffling the man's hair teasingly.

"uhm, i do programming, computer stuff...yeah, it's nothing interesting like the arts b-but it's what i d-do best." a weak smile was on his lips and you chuckle softly.

"no, that sounds cute. you seem to be like a tech nerd, please take no offense. i mean to compliment you." you said, saving your mistake last second. even if they were younger than you, the level of respect and professionalism still had to be present between all of you.

red was painted across jungkook's face...he was cute to you? taehyung and jimin clenched the utensils on their hands, annoyed with how jungkook unknowingly one upped them. yoongi and hoseok sent glares to jungkook. namjoon and jin simply smiled, although they were fuming internally.

"oh, thank you..."

you nodded, biting into the food present in front of you. the taste was extravagant, even if it was a simple dish.

"my gosh, who made this? it is delicious." you moaned out, wiping your mouth. "this is so good, and home made?"

"that would be me, darling. and of course, home made. i like being able to overlook the food the boys eat, make sure they get their nutrients and stuff. i try to limit the amount of time they eat out,but sometimes i can't control it. especially if i'm in another country." you nodded impressed with the subtle fact he dropped, whether he did it on purpose or not.

"what do you guys do? i'm intrigued now with your professions." you said, resting your heaad on your hand.

"well, i graduated already...but i run my own dance studio. you should stop by sometime! we've won a couple awards, i'm very proud of my students!" hoseok smiles wide, and you could easily tell how much dance meant to him.

"i'm taking online classes for psychology. going to college is such a hassle, online is so much easier." namjoon says with a heavy sigh which you jokingly cheers to. making the males laugh at your humor.

"we, my friend, are on the same page!" you said and he laughed, making you smile widely.

"i produce music. i post my works on soundcloud...i promise i'm not like every other soundcloud rapper. i actually care about what i make, rather than the views it'll give me. i also have interest in photography, but tae is much better than me." yoongi was quiet and fidgeting when he saw the gaze of you on him. but at his last statement, you pouted a bit.

"i'm sure you two have your own styles and qualities in your work. also i've never met a producer before, i look forward to listening to your work as your career prgresses." you smiled kindly at him and he ducked his down to hide his blush. you chuckle before moving your gaze to the eldest at the table.

"oh, my turn. about time~" the boys scoffed and his attitude when you chuckled, at ease in his presence. "i mainly stay at home and do work in my office, but when push comes to shove i do have to leave the country. i'm heir to my father's company, so i have to take responsibility sometimes...and you must be wondering. so i'll answer the question now. the reason why i'm in this wheelchair is because i was in a bad accident when i was young." he nodded solemnly, although he was smiling weakly. there was a silence as you took the words in. "thank God my face was spared though."

he cupped his cheek, initiating a innocent look as everyone broke into a smile, looking over to the man with a wonder.

how could someone be so positive after such a horrific event? which was what you were thinking.

but the rest of the boys simply sighed in relief at their hyung. he was always a good liar. and they were lucky you were completely politely innocent and oblivious to their hyung's lie. he had lied more than once to you already, cheeky person he was

"yes, your face was surely spared." you said joining in with the joke.

the rest of the dinner consisted of you bonding over little things. your love for all kinds of games (including pranks) was shared with jungkook, love for animal life with namjoon, sleep with yoongi, culinary with jin, free expression with hoseok, puppies and dogs with taehyung, and family and friends with jimin. the general direction of every conversation was satisfying as it ended with everyone having a smile on their faces.

you had helped clean up, already beginning your new task as a house maid/nurse. "so what would like me to focus on as my first days?" you asked after everything was cleaned. the youngest had to go to their rooms, to begin getting ready for bed since they had school tomorrow. all their classes were in the morning which was fortunate for you since you would be driving them there from now on...and it didn't seem like fun to constantly drive back to the house and then to the university.

namjoon, who was standing in front of you, moved to the study table in the living room, and took a Manila folders into his hands. it seemed like a thick stack of papers and as you looked closer, there were a total of 7.

"no formal work, but all 7 of us saw it appropriate to give you an introduction to our needs. what exactly is wrong with us, y'know? we trust you're experience enough for this so we are confident you'll do just fine."

you took the stack of papers and thanked him. you walked through the house to find your room, which hoseok had shown you right after dinner was finished, and you still marveled at the sight.

it was a grand gray and white minimalistic bedroom with a huge bed in the center. there was also a large ledge with a window that you could sit on to see the night sky. you maneuvered your way over to the study table, turning the lap on to begin "studying" the males.

●𝖐𝖎𝖒 𝖘𝖊𝖔𝖐𝖏𝖎𝖓 / kim seokjin

disabilities/disorders: unable to move bottom half of body, a light case of schizophrenia, requires special attention on getting ready in the morning (may include dressing and showering)

meds: need daily dose for schizophrenia

your brows furrowed. that existed? you knew schizophrenia existed, but meaning a light case would specifically show what? you just shrugged and decided to what the papers were saying.

●𝖒𝖎𝖓 𝖞𝖔𝖔𝖓𝖌𝖎 / min yoongi

disabilities/disorders: OCD, severe depression, social anxiety, prone to panic and anxiety attacks in a crowd of many people, values his personal space-do not enter his personal bubble unless asked

meds: needs dose for OCD, depression

you nodded slowly, understanding the conditions and seeing the familiar names once again. you've had patients like him before, but everyone is different, so you will still be careful.

●𝖏𝖚𝖓𝖌 𝖍𝖔𝖘𝖊𝖔𝖐 / jung hoseok

disabilities/disorders: bipolar disorder, ADHD, OCD, fits of anger are dangerous, act hostile in any case and alert one of the other tenants immediately

meds: dose for ADHD & OCD

sudden shortness of his list made you a bit hopeful that taking care of 7 males wouldn't be as hard as it seemed. then again, you willingly signed up for this so you shouldn't be complaining in any way.

●𝖐𝖎𝖒 𝖓𝖆𝖒𝖏𝖔𝖔𝖓 / kim namjoon

disabilities/disorders: depression, OCD, past with alcohol abuse (currently in rehab)

meds: dose for depression and OCD

you pouted slightly, only being able to imagine how hard it must be to recover from alcoholism. and it was saddening to see such an intellectual and kind person such as Namjoon suffer from the mental illness, although that could be said about everyone you had previously read.

●𝖕𝖆𝖗𝖐 𝖏𝖎𝖒𝖎𝖓 / park jimin

disabilities/disorders: ARFID, anxiety, prone to panic and anxiety attacks

meds: none

reading the single line you let yourself think of the moment he introduced himself. he was enthusiastic about meeting you, it made you smile at the memory. you were suddenly thankful for getting such a sweet and honey-like expression out of the man.

●𝖐𝖎𝖒 𝖙𝖆𝖊𝖍𝖞𝖚𝖓𝖌 / kim taehyung

disabilities/disorders: OCD, ADD, brief psychotic disorder - periods are short and caused by stress, not dangerous unless triggered by something you do or say

meds: dose for OCD, ADD, and best if given sleep meds during pyschotic episodes

you nodded slowly, understanding and keeping the directions in the back of your mind.

●𝖏𝖊𝖔𝖓 𝖏𝖚𝖓𝖌𝖐𝖔𝖔𝖐 / jeon jungkook

disabilities/disorders: DID, psychotic, anxiety

meds: dose to limit psychotic episodes

the 3 things on the list made your eyebrows furrow. the 3 seemed to make a terrible combination and you began thinking of how calm Jungkook was before. You hoped you wouldn't encounter any bad alters of Jungkook, if he had any bad ones. and, honestly, you were a bit uneducated in the DID field, so you were determined to learn more tonight with the help of the internet.

and the last sheet in each file were filed letters to make sure you caught it :

THEY SHOULD NEVER BE KEPT UNSUPERVISED FOR A LONG TIME. MEDICATION IS IN THE CABINET IN YOUR ROOM WITH PADLOCK TO AVOID OVERDOSES. THANK YOU FOR YOUR UNDERSTANDING AND COMPLIANCE.

you took the words seriously, seeing the urgency in the message. shutting the folders, you stacked all of them in one pile and moved to freshen up. a shower was needed as you climbed into the steaming bathroom. after washing yourself, you climbed into bed and soon you were falling asleep. you fell asleep thinking about how tomorrow would be your first day of your new job.

a/n- thank you so much for the support of this book!!! I hope you guys stay tuned and enjoy the rest of the journey with yabdere!bts

oooh, curious question

》what other times do you think jin lied to you? hmmm?

♡♡♡♡♡SEND ME UR ASK ON WHAT U THINK ABT THATTTTT♡♡♡♡♡

#yandere bts #yandere #yandere bts imagines #yandere imagines #x reader #bts x reader #yandere x reader #sickly ff #ot7 bts #bts ot7 #yandere ot7 #bts sickly ff #bts ff

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mimisstudy · 4 years ago

Text

Ash - character study

We are doing a new project called ‘write what you know’ which means writing a film about something that has happened to you or around you. Mine is about why people don’t report things straight away as this is something I see complained about a lot with #metoo

Ash is the main character ~17, and based on me. She lived with her dad who emotionally and sexually abused her, and then moved in with her mum when she was ~16.

this is a super long post btw

Personality

Are they more optimistic or pessimistic? Pessimistic - considers herself a realist, prepare for the worst, hope for the best.

Are they introverted or extroverted? Introverted - was great at making friends as a kid but really struggles to since living with her dad.

What bad habits do they have? She keeps things to herself far too much - she wasn’t allowed to talk to her dad as he would make it about himself and so, despite not living with him anymore, she still internalises until she can’t anymore

What makes them laugh out loud? Shitty puns

How do they display affection? Giving gifts - listening to what they like and giving things related to this

How do they want to be seen by others? Smart (was always told she was smart so doesn’t want to seem dim)

How do they see themselves? An idiot, weak, a bad person. Then she moves. Smart, funny, kind, brave, creative/inventive

How are they seen by others? Funny, kind, smart, gentle

How competitive are they? Competitive with themselves, doesn’t care so much about competing with others but hates when she does something worse than she has before.

Do they make snap judgments or take time to consider? Indecisive but once set on a plan, she will do it to the max.

How do they react to praise? Struggles to, not used to it

How do they react to criticism? Also struggles as not used to it. Never really praised or crisitised, just sort of blends in

What is their greatest fear? Wasps. Being abandoned.

What are their biggest secrets? The abuse

What is their philosophy of life? Fuck it, might as well try.

When was the last time they cried? A wasp landed on her while she was on a hike and she had a panic attack

What haunts them? Her dad. she is starting to see him on the streets and in her dreams.

What are their political views? Prioritising people's safety and well-being over the economy

What will they stand up for? Equality, environment, women's rights, sexual assault

What quality do they most value in a friend? Honest / real

If they could change one thing about themselves, what would it be? Their past, though she wouldn’t actually change it. Or make themselves more confident

What is their obsession? gardening

What are their pet peeves?

What are their idiosyncrasies? Autistic. Stampy feet flappy hands.

Friends and Family

Is their family big or small? Who does it consist of? Small - Taylor (sibling), mum and dad. Lots of extended family but she has moved too much to bond with them.

What is their perception of family? Used to hate her mum but now appreciates her. Loves Taylor but weird sister relationship as they didn’t grow up together

Do they have siblings? Older or younger? Taylor, 3 years older.

Describe their best friend. Does not have any - struggles to bond with people long term

Describe their other friends. Mainly extroverted people that talk for her.

Past and Future

Did they grow up rich or poor? Not obviously poor (she wasn’t aware of it) but far from rich. Under the poverty line a few times but didn’t go to food banks

Did they grow up nurtured or neglected? Felt nurturing but was rather emotionally abusive

What is the most offensive thing they ever said? ‘I would like to live with mum/dad’

What was their first kiss like? Awkward school dare - she’s not that into dating but did hook up with someone while in a depressive episode to avoid thinking

What is the worst thing they did to someone they loved? ‘Basically everything ever’

What are their ambitions? To help others get through what she did. set up her own music label

What advice would they give their younger self? Say no clearer

What was their childhood ambition? Be a musician

What is their best childhood memory? Camping at Tolpuddle music festival and the way the musicians interacted with the audience.

What is their worst childhood memory? The dad experience

Did they have an imaginary childhood friend? No. She would talk to her blanket though.

Love

Do they believe in love at first sight? No. She is aro/ace, she thinks

Are they in a relationship? No.

How do they behave in a relationship? She has only been in one proper relationship and this was a depressed escapism one - she was sleeping with her as a distraction from her life but wasn’t sexually or romantically attracted to her. she was nice to her but was mainly there for the sex - though she is terrified of insulting people so was still respectful and kind

Has your character ever been in love? No

Have they ever had their heart broken? By her family, yes

Conflict

How do they respond to a threat? Disassociating - she struggles to speak and is very slow. She also stims a lot which leads to rubbing her skin raw and has many scars because of this.

Are they most likely to fight with their fists or their tongue? Neither but her tongue if really having to.

What is your character’s kryptonite? Loud people/sounds

If your character could only save one thing from their burning house, what would it be? Her blanket that she has had since she was born

How do they perceive strangers? No one is trusted until they do something big

What do they love to hate? Sound design

What are their phobias? Wasps

What living person do they most despise? Certain political leaders and CEO’s that are fucking up the plannet

Have they ever been bullied or teased? No - they aren’t really noticed at all. Taylor used to tease her constantly though - mean, even for a sister, but they are far better together now.

Where do they go when they’re angry? To her garden plot. She has one away from the house.

Who are their enemies and why? She doesn’t pay attention to anyone enough to hate them that much.

Work, Education and Hobbies

Do they have a job? Yes

What is their current job? Editing music videos for a band that she knows from secondary

What do they think about their current job? She likes doing it but hates that she could mix the songs better than them - they wont let her change anything though

What are some of their past jobs? They worked at the sweet shop round the corner for a few months before she moved in with her mum.

What are their hobbies? Mixing, baking, minecraft, gardening

Educational background? 7+ (the new uk grading system) in all subjects at secondary. Working on a music and media course at college - predicted distinctions.

Intelligence level? Very smart but struggles understanding basic things often

Do they have a natural talent for something? Baking but she doesn’t enjoy it so doesn’t do it often.

Do they play a sport? Are they any good? Swimming - she’s good enough to not drown but mainly enjoys just floating around

What is their socioeconomic status? Working class. Her mum is slightly more well off (upper working) but both parents kept their money troubles to themselves.

Favourites

What is their favourite animal? Snakes

Which animal do they dislike the most? Wasps

What place would they most like to visit? Havana, Cuba due to all the music that has originated there.

What is their favourite song? We’re going to be friends - the white stripes

Music, art, reading preferred? Music

What is their favourite colour? Green

What is their password? Chrysanth3mum

Favourite food: Bolognese but the pasta separate.

Who is their favourite artist? The Crane Wives

Possessions

What is on their bedside table? (Kubrick was obsessed with bedside tables, he thought they spoke the truth about an individual). Three books: one on music theory, Percy Jackson but she’s barely got through it, and one on gardening. A bedside lamp. A mug. Her glasses. A spray. A hat. Sweet wrappers. A pen and pencil. Her journal, open.

What is in their bin? A years worth of receipts after she finally emptied her wallet. Seed packets. Tissues.

What is in their purse or wallet? Lots of receipts and business cards. A few bank cards. Lots of change but no notes.

What is in their pockets? Her phone and earplugs. Her jacket pockets are stuffed: rocks and shells she likes, seed packets, tissues, gloves, various bits of rubbish she has picked up, pens, a tiny notebook

What is their most treasured possession? Her hardrive

Spirituality

Do they believe in the afterlife? She hopes is doesn’t exist - the idea of still being alive after you die is horrifying

What are their religious views? She was into all the spiritual wiccan things at one point but fell out of it during her last depression spell. She still uses crystals and tarot cards though.

What do they think heaven is? Heaven is in the moments of bliss

What do they think hell is? The world we are currently living in

Are they superstitious? She thinks other things are out there and around us but she isn’t scared of that. She likes to leave apples outside for the ghosts and fae

How would they like to die? Either by her own hand (again, depressed) or drowning. Old age would also be nice.

What is their zodiac sign? Taurus

Values

What do they think is the worst thing that can be done to a person? Not listen to them

When did they last lie? ‘No, its fine’ - when asked if they wanted to talk about what he did

What’s their view of lying? Lying is bad, it’s just really confusing. That being said, she is okay with it when you are doing so to protect yourself

When did they last make a promise? They don’t make promises

Daily life

What are their eating habits? They won’t eat things if they are in the wrong order. Eating is boring so she wont do it unless she is actually hungry. She has lots of ‘bad’ foods - tomatoes (puree is okay), cucumber, bananas, mushrooms, dates, oranges (orange juice is okay). Fizzy drinks. ARFID

Do they have any allergies? no

Are they minimalist or a clutter hoarder? Hoarder. Everything looks like a mess but it all has a reason for being where it is.

What do they do first thing on a weekday morning? Clean teeth, shower, water, food, pack bag, get dressed, clean teeth, check the lights and plugs, college.

What do they do on a Sunday afternoon? Edit and then do some gardening

What do they do on a Friday night? Make pizza and play minecraft and drink

What is the soft drink of choice? She doesn’t like fizzy drinks. She will have ribeena

What is their alcoholic drink of choice? Blackberry liquor that her mum makes for social drinking. She has a habit of getting very drunk with vodka and smoking to dull her mind

Miscellaneous

Who is their hero? Elton John

What or who would your character dress up as for Halloween? She doesn’t celebrate halloween and instead tries to do Samhain rituals.

Are they comfortable with technology? Yes but she does tape over her camera and is always using a vpn

If they could call one person for help, who would it be? Taylor

What is their greatest regret? That they didn’t say no enough. Thinks about the butterfly effect constantly though so wouldn’t change anything in her past if she could.

What would they do if they won the lottery? Split the money between her, her sister, her mum and a little tiny bit for her dad so he doesn’t hate her. She would set up her own music label and get a farm but almost the rest of it will be for setting up charities/donating. She wants one charity for helping victims of abuse, another to go to an orphanage, and then to alazhiemers and autism charities.

What is their favourite fairytale? Snow white and rose red

Do they believe in happy endings? No

What is their idea of perfect happiness? Sat on her farm, her music playing softly in the background, many cats and goats and chickens, and a bowl of soup.

If your character could travel through time, where would they go? They would stay right where they are. Although, she would quite like to tell the guy that came up with autism to not be a sexist twat.

What sport do they excel at? They are weirdly good at golf but don’t like it as it is such an unnecessary use of green space

What sport do they suck at? Frisby

If they could have a superpower, what would they choose? Invisibility or the power to change chances

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