#i definitely think he’d fear losing color. a lot.

[howlsofbloodhounds]

I personally think the fear of abandonment fandom often portrays killer with is massively overexaggerated compared to his canon.

Idk I feel like people make that his driving motivation way too much—when it only becomes relevant if he can actually form some type of emotional attachment (or in a case of someone like nightmare who has power over him, a fear of being deemed useless and discarded—which is tied to his sense of survival and not exactly because of an emotional attachment.)

Which he struggles to do in Stage 2, and doesn’t seem interested in doing—except, possibly, if there’s something to gain out of it.

[letmeoutofthebasementt]

Felix Jealousy

SKZ Jealousy series pt. 6: (when they're in a serious relationship do they get jealous at all? What makes them jealous if they get jealous? How do they act in a relationship? What's their response/behavior when jealous? How do they handle it?)

Felix doesn’t get jealous he gets helpless. Like, if he sees his partner getting hit on or flirting with someone else it doesn’t invoke jealousy, it just makes him doubt his ability to be enough for them in the relationship, or even doubt their commitment to him. It just makes him lose focus on a lot of things and feel very exhausted. It’s very draining to him. And yeah his self esteem plummets a lot, though it’s probably already low. I see him as being very insecure and self critical already so that would kinda be the icing on the cake in that aspect.

I honestly think he avoids confronting it because he knows it’ll stress him out. Like he kind of just removes himself from the situation and reflects on it later to see if he was just blowing the situation out of proportion. He’s need some serious R&R after. Because it’s a hit to his pride, his self esteem, and his self worth.

He feels like he’s being taken for granted. It’s like “Why is this person entertaining others when they have me?” Type thing. But he doesn’t want to risk anything so he shuts up.

I think it’s the Libra Mercury/Venus talking. As someone who has his Venus, Mercury, and Mars I can relate to most of this in terms of mood. It probably makes him simultaneously mad and depressed. Probably cries a lot. Especially with that potential Aries moon his emotions go absolutely haywire. He probably plans out this major confrontation but never does it because he doesn’t want to rock the boat. He would with anyone else, but never his partner.

He also may feel like his partner is getting bored of him.

He’ll honestly just be suffering. Another one who could get cheated on and blame himself for it. He feels like he’s a disappointment to his partner and that’s why they’re entertaining another people. He puts himself down a lot, and again just fears that he may risk losing them if he speaks up. A lot of pain and grief here. He’d also probably experience a lot of self-pity.

Generally he may enter like a depression? Or maybe even is already depressed because like I’ve never met someone with his lineup who isn’t at least mildly so. But I dunno I’m not diagnosing shit.

Once he gets over it though…Welp.

He goes into the point of reflection. And if he realizes that…Either A, what they did is wildly disrespectful to me, B, that was basically cheating in my face, or C, this is crossing a lot of boundaries, he finally addresses it head on.

And…Well, it’s loud.

It may not start as an argument but it always ends as an argument. Because it’s blunt. It’s personal. And it’s probably right. It drives too close to home and he reads you for absolute filth, and most people can’t really handle that. So then it turns into an argument, and/or he needs to feel heard or he flies off the handle.

And he can argue. He can argue for hours, even, until the other person finally walks away from the situation or “sees reason”.

When his confidence is regained it’s boosted. Because he realizes that he’s worth more than this BS.

I also think he 100% tells everyone close to him about it. And then if it was because of actual cheating he just tells everyone about it period. Close or not, he won’t shut up about it. Because he’s very public with these matters.

He’s definitely an unconditional love type. Until you make him doubt if it should be unconditional or even love. He sees through rose colored glasses mostly, but if there’s too much eventually he snaps out of it and realizes…This is some bullshit. Everything starts adding up and the puzzle pieces start connecting. All of a sudden he’s seeing the situation for what it is.

And he drops you quick.

Cause if there’s one thing about him he’s not about to linger in an unfulfilling situation. He’s leaving, and he’s probably moving on within 10-12 business days. Not because he never loved or cared about you, but because…He moves on fast. He emotionally checks out of situations quickly. He sees past relationships fondly as something he grew from, but not fond enough that there’s this massive period of mourning it. He may vaguely miss the person occasionally, but in general he’ll be fine.

Probably the type who braces himself for these things anyways. Not in a holding back weighing on his heart way, but just in a…He knows relationships don’t always last. So while he’s in them he makes the most of every moment so he’ll never regret it once it’s gone. And it’s effective for him.

In general he’s more hurt by friendship breakups than relationship ones.

So yeah, definitely turns to his friends and probably moves onto the next fairly quickly.

If he realizes he’s right he’ll also trust himself more. And if he realizes he was wrong he’ll trust in his self worth more. Either way he’s growing from the experience.

If his partner truly hadn’t been doing anything wrong he’ll work hard to fix it, and overcome any obstacles. He’s very determined like that. And even if his partner did something wrong that could be forgiven he’d enter that state.

In general, he’s constantly growing and evolving.

Definitely a lot of inner conflict throughout all of this though. A lot of personality clashes within him. He had two very polarizing sides, which I can again relate to. They’re very different. Because inherently, he’s bold and fiery and ambitious. His rage builds rapidly but doesn’t go away so quickly. His Leo Mars is fixed. And honestly really underrated for grudge holding capability. And if he has an Aries Moon this increases things tenfold. And sure these things may be regulated by his Virgo sun, but they generally clash with his more Libran aspects.

But yeah, generally in the moment he loses faith in himself. He suppresses his feelings and blocks them off. He gets really frustrated through, and probably easy to set off because it’s simmering unresolved and bottled up, not like it’s meant to be. And there’s so, so much rage there. Like I’m talking one minor inconvenience and he’s losing his shit.

Mayhaps possibly be into like

“Jealous” intercourse

Trying to make this as clinical as possible to make this PG-13

In general gets very independent in this time. Probably shuts himself off a lot from his partner and will prefer the company of friends until things have calmed down and cooled off. Because he doesn’t want to ruin things with his potential anger.

Again, a very transformative experience.

And it also bruises his pride a lot. He’s a prideful person whether he has high self esteem or not.

Probably has a weird mix of a superiority and inferiority complex.

But yeah, definitely would use this to fuel other endeavors. He also may have a big breakthrough about the relationship as a whole during these times. In general, he’s very good at cutting to the heart of matters. And once his mind clears…

Well we’ve been over this.

[insane4fandoms]

As thanks for our little chat earlier, here are some random headcanons on my EgoPats! Talking with friends always seems to get my creative juices flowing.

Caliban doesn’t have quite as big of a sweet tooth as irl Matt does, but he still appreciates some sugary stuff along with savory stuff (i.e. his and Murdock’s hit-targets). His favorite treats (aside from Diet Coke, because duh. He’s an Egopat, lol) are typically gummy alligators or gummy sharks. Yes, he always makes sure to start by biting the gummy’s head off, because that’s just how you eat gummies, okay? (This was actually inspired by that Gummy Food vs. Real Food Challenge on GTLive; it’s one of my favorite episodes, so many hilarious moments.) 

Penn is pretty interested in Vulture Culture. Yeah, his fossil-hunting already plays a huge part in that, but he’s just sort of fascinated by the skulls/bones of modern animals as well as those of prehistoric creatures. (Bonus points if the bones happen to have been painted for whatever reason.) Granted, they’d have to be ethically sourced for him to collect them, because he’s nice and conscious like that. 

Some of LeviathanPat’s traits/abilities are more instinctual than “at-will.” The biggest example of this: an extra eye that can sprout on his forehead, larger and darker than his primaries. While he can choose to grow and retract extra eyes (just like he can with extra mouths, limbs, etc.), this particular forehead eye only opens up when his emotions are running high, or when he’s in a serious situation. I guess you could say that the forehead eye is, in itself, a type of Sixth Sense. (Though, as a cosmic abomination, L.P. definitely has way more than six senses, lol. Also, this was inspired by one of the ways you’ve drawn him in the past, so…thanks!)

Penn loves gemstones and minerals just as much as fossils. Sure, his career is paleontology, but he just really likes shiny/colorful things on the side. He’ll occasionally keep pieces of fossil for his personal collection, but only on occasion, since, y’know, museums need fossils for their exhibits. So, gemstones are a little easy for that kinda stuff. (And, with that first headcanon in mind: have you ever seen that art trend where crystals are attached to or even grown on cleaned animal skulls? If not, they’re all over Etsy, so, you’re welcome, lol. But yeah, Penn would LOVE to get one of those.)

Along with helping Yancy out with musical stuff, Ozzie has a love for drawing. It’s just something he’s been doing since he was little, though he’s currently much better at pencil-work than painting. 

Patty does a variety of things in his off-time from dancing, but one of his favorites is sculpting. He’s had quite a lot of practice, but he usually tends to just make small pieces for decoration. This includes little clay charms for necklaces (yeah, he definitely made one as a present for Delux one time, lol. I’m thinking maybe…a little black fox? Obviously Delux can’t wear it when he’s working for fear of losing it on the streets or at a client’s place, but we both know he’d still appreciate it.) 

Despite being a terrifying outer monstrosity, LeviathanPat is sort of claustrophobic. This is due to all the time he was trapped in the underground tomb that Penn and Illinois accidentally freed him from. He usually spends a lot of time hunting outside at night (because of his whole window schtick), but if he ever finds an opportunity to actually go inside a place, then it’ll have to be good and spacious for him to be comfortable. (Along with his shapeshifting skills, LeviathanPat is also capable of sizeshifting, which he can use in a pinch. Though, due to his pride, he’d never even consider turning smaller than a human, lol). 

Ahhhh all of these are great!

Some of these headcanons are not much different than mine, you also definitely got me to rewatch the gummy vs real video, always makes me laugh to see Matt and Steph freak out over the gummy spider lmao

Here’s some small headcanons I had because why not

Penn would absolutely be a skull collector, but most importantly he would be a cat. Illinois would be chilling on the couch one day and Penn would jump on him and ominously hand him a deer skull and smile before walking away, leaving Illinois to sit there dumbfounded and a little scared of where the hell Penn got that.

I’d imagine Patty sleeping in the most pretzel like positions ever to be seen from humanity lol. Imagine being his roommate and walking into the room to see him sleep in a way like he’s posing for a renaissance painting.

Patty would also be a god at drag makeup. Like give this man a makeup palette and he’ll go face your face the vision of god.

I think Ozzy would be (and forced to be) Yancy’s costume designer when he wants to do a musical number. I like the idea of a brute muscle having the most patient hobby like art. I also think painting is much harder personally, but with a bit of good behavior, he’ll probably learn to paint watercolor.

Caliban, my man, would 100 percent horde all of the Diet Coke from others. Bro does NOT like to share when it comes to his treats. Even R.D. would make Caliban hesitate to give up his precious soda, but one look from her and he’ll melt and gladly hand one over. Azalea and Murdock on the other hand they’ll fight like cats for one. (Mad would get his head chopped off before he could even ask)

Now LeviathanPat, I got plans for him, but one funny headcanon is that while his shapeshifting is effective and sometimes in his advantage, he definitely got ran over one too many times by a random car. Not in his eldritch form, but maybe around like a bear size or deer when he wanders.

He also hates hunting season as he was also mistaken for a deer one too many times, and it was getting tiring or either killing or scaring off the hunters. I would also agree on LeviathanPat being claustrophobic due to him being trapped in the tomb, but one thing he may not find unnerving?

Possession, he’ll just have to find the perfect host to leech on…

And he had already laid his eyes upon him the moment the tomb was opened.

[toki-is-the-king]

Toki and Skwisgaar as your partner head canons:

I’m sick so me and Toki have been making these hehe sorry they’re all over the place. These are gender neutral as well so you can imagine any gender as their s/o <3

Toki:

Although Toki is way more childish, he likes to take on the caretaker roll in the relationship (when he’s not age regressed, then he needs to be taken care of). Toki likes to wake up early and get your coffee and bring it to you while you’re still asleep. He’d wake you up by kissing you on the cheek and attacking you in hugs and kisses.

Toki is very much into serving his partner. He shows his love by acts of service and encouraging words. He remembers the small things about you like your favorite color or your first kiss, your favorite childhood memory and how toasted you like your toast. Toki will definitely stop you to tie your shoes for you if he notices they’ve come undone, and he loves to open doors for you or carry all the heavy bags after you’ve gone shopping together. He’s more traditional than the other guys and wants to marry you so he can spoil you and shower you with his love every day, not that he doesn’t already. Toki is already thinking of marriage on the second date and says ‘I love you’ first. He wants you to think he’s the strongest and most capable person ever and show you he can do anything- but but the longer you’re with him you’ll start to see he can’t always be the strong one, he will most likely need you to be strong half the time, if not more.

Toki is a sweetheart but he does have his moments of suppressed rage and it scares him more than it does you. His ptsd often manifests in anger and lots of yelling and tears. He would never take his anger out on you, it’s always on himself (or drunk guys screaming too loudly at concerts) but whenever you find him with bloody knuckles or bruises and cuts he’s inflicted on himself, it breaks your heart and he feels too ashamed to speak to you while he’s huddled on the floor in a corner somewhere.

Toki will often shut down and goes catatonic after his episodes and you’ll have to make sure to be very gentle with him. Once he’s stopped dissociating as severely, he’s usually fallen into age regressing and needs lots of gentle coaxing and reassurance. Even when he’s regressed, Toki still wants to make you proud of him and show you he is a good partner. He’s even more affectionate to you and shares his favorite stuffed animals with you, pleading with you to cuddle with him in his bed that’s way too small for two adults, but you do it anyway and hold him while he watches cartoons. He will want you to sleep with him until he’s feeling safe enough to be an adult again, and when he wakes up as his adult self with you beside him, he often breaks down and thanks you for staying with him, constantly apologizing for his actions but you always assure him that you love him no matter what. With some persuasion from you, Toki might even attend some therapy sessions, but once you tell him about couples therapy then he’s completely hooked- he never knew you could take your partner with you and he loves it. He spends most of the sessions holding your hands and listening to you talk and smiling every time you look at him. When it’s his turn to speak he usually spends most of the time saying how much he loves you, and when he finally begins to open up about his past and the child abuse he endured, you are right there with him, holding him and telling him he is so brave and it allows him to revisit the traumatic memories without fully losing it.

Therapy helps Toki understand himself better and that he’s not a bad person or too damaged to be loved. He often blames himself for the abuse he suffered as a child but he learns to accept himself and you are so proud of him for being brave and facing this fears. It makes him so happy and he loves to hear how proud of him you are.

Sex with Toki is very tender and sweet. When he is in the mood it’s amazing, and you’re still shocked he’s never been very sexually active, because the groupies are missing out. But most of the time Toki prefers hand holding, kissing, hugging, and romance. He was so sheltered growing up that he didn’t learn much about sex at all, but he loved romance books and poems and all he ever wanted was true love like in the fairy tale books he would read. He loves to do the cheesiest things like putting rose petals on your bed and then lying in the middle of it with nothing on. (Skwisgaar taught him to do it and he saved it to use on the perfect person).

Another thing Toki absolutely loves is bathing together. He will run you a huge bubble bath and adds all kinds of bath bombs and flowery scents to help you relax and gets your favorite body wash that he will rub all over you. He lights candles and has the Klokateers open a bottle of wine for you both to share (he can’t figure out how to open the wine bottles). As the two of you bathe together he’d start to give you a massage and kiss you all over. Toki loves giving hickies and leaving marks everywhere, and sometimes he gets too carried away but it’s only because he loves you so much and he wants everyone to know that you are his. After the bubble bath, Toki wraps you up in heated towels and takes you back to his room where he’s set up an indoor date night with snacks and more wine and your favorite movie on his iPad. He always has a touch of innocence to his actions and it’s so sweet.

Bonus for cheesy romance: Toki is the type of guy who buys you those teddy bears holding hearts that you get at CVS. He buys you a stuffed animal for every occasion and you cherish each one. He gets so excited when he stays over at your house for the night and sees the teddy bears piled on your bed.

Skwisgaar:

Skwisgaar was extremely against relationships at first and only wanted a one night stand, but once he met you, he fell in love and he couldn’t lose you. He’d never been in love and though it scared him he never wanted you to leave him.

Skwisgaar would appear to be more of the dominant type considering he’s the guitar god and usually thinks very highly of himself, but that’s not always the case. At first, he tries to force himself to be the strong caretaker type but he’s emotionally unavailable and too detached to know how to do any of that. He’s also not as traditionally ‘masculine’ as he tries to play off. Once he gets comfortable with you (it takes a long time) and lets his walls down just slightly, you’ll see a completely different side of him. Though he tries to hide it because the rest of Dethklok make fun of him. He’s the one who reminds you to do a skin care routine or take off your make up before going to bed, and if you forget you will wake up with Skwisgaar on top of you, scrubbing your face with make up wipes and lathering it with moisturizer. Skwisgaar will definitely do facials with you and likes getting pedicures or having his hair brushed when he’s falling asleep. He likes to be told how pretty he is and that he’s beautiful, he loves compliments more than anything. He’s also very into being taken care of, and won’t admit it for awhile, but it is obvious from the start that he likes to be treated as royalty and spoiled.

As a one night stand he is standoffish afterwards and might not remember someone’s name- but as a boyfriend Skwisgaar is surprisingly very clingy, but in a subtle way so he doesn’t scare you off. He doesn’t have a lot of people he can depend on or let his guard down with, so once you’ve made it on his list of safe people, he always wants to be with you and always wants your undivided attention. He gets very offended and upset if he feels ignored, so you’ll have to make sure to reassure him you aren’t abandoning him if you don’t respond to his texts right away. Skwisgaar has deep rooted abandonment issues and surprisingly low self esteem when it comes to himself without his guitar skills. When he’s not on stage being worshipped like a god, he’s very insecure and anxious about himself as person. His ego needs constant validation and without it he feels worthless. He has many narcissistic tendencies but it doesn’t make him bad, and you are always so patient with him. You understand that he’s been seriously neglected and promise him you won’t ever do that to him, he finds it hard to believe but the sincerity in your voice makes his eyes light up.

He’s never been genuinely loved so he’s in constant competition with everyone for your approval, and if you show more attention, even platonically, to the anyone else, he notices instantly and gets upset and will sulk for hours until you ask him what’s wrong. He worries you’ll leave him if he’s not the best and he often takes the smallest things very personally. His emotions are very fragile though he tries to pretend he has none. When Skwisgaar is upset he thinks he’s great at hiding it but everyone will know when he’s having a bad day- he’s a bit of a drama queen but you love him any way.

When you’re around other people he often puts on a persona that he’s better than everyone around him and even though he wants you to love him, he can be a huge dick if there’s a crowd of people watching and he wants to impress them. There are times where he’s too blunt or rude to you and it doesn’t occur to him how mean it sounded until you tell him. Once he realizes he’s hurt your feelings he feels awful and will do anything to make it up to you. Skwisgaar might come off as being very unfeeling (he is quite the opposite), but he cares deeply about his friends and even more for his partner, and is always internally panicked over losing you. He can be mature if he really tries, and will work to change his bitchy behavior just for you (he refuses to be a toxic person like his mother).

Skwisgaar also likes to take care of you financially and will always leave you little ‘I love you’ notes with a wad of cash inside encouraging you to buy yourself something nice. He loves buying you expensive bouquets of flowers any chance he gets.

Skwisgaar is a very sexual person and he shows love through intimacy. He’s the best sexual partner you’ll ever have and he always makes sure he’s doing everything to your liking. It gets him off to know you’re enjoying yourself because of him and that alone is enough to satisfy him. If you have anything you’re specifically into he will bend over backwards to satisfy you and is never afraid to engage in the kinky stuff you’re into just to please you. He also has his own sexual desires that he is usually so up front about, but when it’s with you he actually becomes very shy and you’ll have to force it out of him. He’s never had sex with someone he actually loves or with someone that actually loves him back. Whenever you tell him you love him he almost cries, and the first few times you told him was while you were having sex. He had to stop everything immediately and left the room so he didn’t cry in front of you. It was awkward and he was ashamed of his actions, but he wasn’t about to cry and anxiously puke all over himself in front of you. He has a lot of issues but he’s working on them because you encourage him.

Skwisgaar has moments where he is too overwhelmed by your affection and doesn’t feel he deserves it, so he will begin to distance himself and it only makes him feel worse. He will only open up about it after you pry it out of him and it usually ends with him being pissy that you forced him to communicate healthily, but then you let him be the little spoon and cuddle him for hours and he’s fine afterwards. You’d never met anyone more touch starved than Skwisgaar- which was impossible to believe because he has sex nearly every day. But it wasn’t enough and he secretly longed for gentle affection.

Skwisgaar is so busy and focused on playing guitar that he forgets to eat and drink like 80% of the time. If he doesn’t have you lovingly scolding him he won’t remember to eat. He was annoyed the first few times, but after awhile it makes him feel cared about, and in a weird way, fills the void that his parents never did. His dad wasn’t there and his mother never cared about what he was doing and so he had to fend for himself. You make sure he never has to feel that way ever again and treat him like a perfect princess because he deserves it.

[lifmera]

Hello! I saw you do matchups so I wanted to request one!! I'd like to request a Hazbin Matchup. If you can't get to me that's quite all right, take you're time!

I'm 18, my pronouns are She/Her, and I'm Pansexual. My favorite color is yellow. My zodiac is Saggitarius (December 21st). I'm 5'3" (short/average).

I am an actor (mainly a stage actor). I love to sing, paint (abstract cause its more forgiving), and cosplay (a lot).

I talk a lot. Some say too much and I was often bullied for it. I curse like a sailor. My teachers are sick and tired of my foul moth they don't even say anything anymore lol. Im very social and like making friends, though i dont have many. But i still try and be a friendly presence and someone people can feel confortable around. I have anxiety as well. I'm super clumsy its actually ridiculous. My family gets nervous everytime I'm near stairs, and I have a scar next to my eye from being so clumsy (I tripped and fell into the corner of a coffee table and bashed my face next to my eye. After my stitches were taken out and it healed, I tripped and fell again, bashing my face into a doorknob in the exact same place 🙃). I'm a danger to society from just how much I fall :) but I'm getting better at catching myself.

I like anime and video games (mainly indie horror [Batim, DDLC (is DDLC indie??), Poppy Playtime, Fnaf, and others.]), and D&D.

I also love musical theatre :)

I'm kinda sensitive as well so please be nice to me. I have an insane fear of Needles and Dogs (which Is super unfortunate). I like fruity flavors over chocolate when it comes to candy.

I hope this is enough info to help you figure out who to match me with :) if not you could just respond and say it's not enough and I'll give more :)

Thank you so much :)

Hey Hun!!

You might hate me, or love me.. BUT..

I’ve paired you with.. ADAM!

Dont hate me.. i love him..

He would definitely force you to act for him. He’d enjoy it so much. And honestly he’d want to play with you!!

He loves your paintings, at first he didn’t really understand why… but when he saw the final product, he loved it!

He’d also force you to cosplay for him.

He’d be like .. “could you cosplay a cute cat girl..? Please? 🥹” (you could kick him in the balls its ok.)

He would bully you, AT FIRST. I think if you confided in Adam he genuinely would stop. He already lost two wives, it probably took him a lot to even bag someone.

Adam seems like a dick head but he would do anything for his s/o.

He would love that you curse like a sailor. You guys would cuss other people out like its a job.

He loves that you are friendly with other people, but holy shit this guy would be POSSESSIVE.

Especially after how clumsy you can be??

This guy is by ur side 24/7. On ur ass like its his LIFE MISSION

Hes definitely a clingy man.

You can talk to him about anything, but just as long as you are able to listen to him too. He just talks ssooo much.

Although like i said, hes pretty much an asshole, he’d get better for you.

He will change for his s/o, because if anything, if he loses another one? Thats just… 😅

He would totally feed you sweets and fruits though, he loves them too!

~~~~

PLEASE DONT HATE ME 🥲🥲🥲

[cricketnationrise]

I’m gonna get in on these ficlets before I lose my chance! 🩵 You rock!!

Time stamp: 6:37pm

Location: Kensington Palace

Character: Arthur Fox

YOU rock! I have no idea what you were expecting with your prompt, but I had a good time writing it!

want your own ficlet? rules here! (only 9 days left to request)

❤️🤍💙❤️🤍💙

kensington palace, 6:37pm

The hallway is silent, any noise stifled by thick carpet and thicker doors; of course it is, it simply wouldn’t do to betray any hint of what happens in the palace. Arthur checks his watch as he paces past the Queen’s study for the umpteenth time. Cat’s been in there for over an hour now.

His past year has been structured around a weekly audience with Her Majesty, trying everything he could possibly think of to get permission to marry Cat. He’d given impassioned speeches, tried simple requests, and everything in between, only to be met with Mary’s disapproval, unmoving as a stone wall. After a whole year, he’d received nothing other than how she takes her tea and a library of dismissive, cutting remarks.

If you’d asked him before he met Catherine, Arthur would have said that no relationship was worth going through all this Royal Nonsense – that the bowing and the scraping was archaic and ultimately pointless. Five seconds after meeting Cat, Arthur already knew that she would do whatever she set her mind to, Queen be damned. Arthur had been the one to advocate for trying to get Her Majesty’s permission in a more traditional way. He knew Cat would marry him either way, but he didn’t want her to have to give up her life, her platform, just for him.

Last week had been one year since he’d first attempted, and then today Cat had been the one summoned.

Arthur bounces on his heels at one end of the foreboding hallway, trying not to catastrophize. An hour and a half. The click of the door opening catches his attention and he moves back to the door anxiously. 

Cat comes bursting out of the study, her swirl of colorful skirts and beaming smile lighting up the hallway. She runs to him and throws her arms around him, laughing in her exuberance. Suddenly she squeezes extra tight and Arthur barks out a laugh as well when his feet leave the ground. Cat spins the both of them around twice before setting him down again, unable to form words, but happiness shining from every corner of her being.

Arthur brings his hands up to cup her face reverently. “I take it she said yes, love?”

“You wore her down! She said we can get engaged – I mean she was really huffy about it and definitely wouldn’t have said yes normally but you basically annoyed her into it and—”

Arthur cuts off her giddy babbling with a fierce kiss, pouring everything he’s feeling into it: his relief, his love, his happiness. Cat grips the lapels of his jacket, not letting him back off an inch for a long, loving moment. When she finally does let him retreat to breathe, he doesn’t go far, just rests his chin on the top of her head and gathers her in his arms.

“I can’t believe it,” he says. “Am I dreaming?”

“Been dreaming about hugging in a hallway a lot, darling?”

Arthur snorts and draws back, letting their fingers tangle together between them before getting down on one knee.

“I haven’t been dreaming about hugging, no. Asking you to marry me without fear of what the Queen would say? Absolutely.” He pulls out the box that hasn’t left his pocket for a full year, and opens it slowly. He meets Cat’s eyes steadily, despite the tears gathering in his own. “Cat. Ever since you snuck backstage that night, my life has been a whirlwind in the best possible way. I’ve never been so grateful to have my future derailed. I can’t wait to officially start our life together. Catherine, will you marry me?”

She’s nodding before he even finishes the question – shouts yes as soon as he does. He stands, kisses her again, and then slips the ring on her finger. His grandmother’s ring may not be up to Royal standards, but she and his grandfather had been married for over sixty years – Arthur hadn’t wanted to give Cat any other ring.

She pulls him down into another kiss, more a pressing of smiles together than anything else. Arthur could fucking fly.

“I can’t believe you proposed in the hallway outside my mother’s study,” she says, half hysterical.

Arthur just shrugs ruefully. “I had a whole romantic plan originally, but somewhere around the third month I realized that I wasn’t willing to wait a single minute past getting permission. Couldn’t let the old bat change her mind, now could I?”

“I suppose not,” Cat agrees, eyes sparkling. “Now, we have to go back to my rooms because I’ll be damned if we celebrate properly in the hall.”

“Yes ma’am,” says Arthur, allowing himself to be towed down the hall.

He’s looking forward to what the future holds more than ever before – it’s brighter than the stars, as easy as a sunrise after a storm – now that he and Cat will be together for the rest of their lives.

[therealnightcity]

Character Study--Hiro

Layer 1: The Outside

-Name: Hiro Oda

-Eye Color: Originally brown, and replaced with blue optics

-Hair Style/Color: Hiro has messy black hair, kept shorter on the sides. It’s usually worn in a bun or a short ponytail. He has black hair, and spends an embarrassing amount of time on it.

-Height: 5'4

-Clothing Style: Hiro's style isn't easy to categorize--he wears whatever catches his eye from crop tops and leathers, to button up shirts that are open down to his waist. He isn't afraid to wear color, or loud patterns, and showing skin, even if it's not always the most practical. When on missions or out and about, he disguises his face using his old Tyger Claws mask. He has two–one in red and the other in black. It’s a chore trying to get him to wear formal clothing, he hates getting dressed up and prefers fabric with a shine/interesting textures (especially leather, but he wouldn’t say no to a dash of latex on occasion, anything that catches the eye). His look is very much influenced by his upbringing, and there's no mistaking from for a Corpo or Nomad.

-Best Physical Feature: He’s attached to his tattoos, despite that they represent a part of his life he’s very much done with. He keeps them as a reminder, of sorts. He’s confident about his appearance and spends a lot of time working on it, and is slightly vain. If you asked someone else, they'd say his freckles are one of his most distinct, or his vibrant blue optics

Layer 02: The Inside

-Fears: He’s afraid of more than he likes to let on. He’s afraid of water especially if he can’t see the bottom of it–he never learned to swim. He’s definitely afraid of losing people he cares about–there’s not very many of them and he’s afraid of his defection from the Tyger Claws painting a target on them. While not exactly a fear he finds the Badlands unsettling–there’s so much open space and it’s oddly quiet, especially after the noise and lights of Night City.

-Guilty Pleasures: Real coffee (even though it’s a frivolous expense), baking, and trying to pet every stray cat he can find.

-Biggest Pet-peeves: How people tend to treat joytoys/dolls, as if they’re disposable. As someone’s who’s past is a bit spotty, it’s a sensitive topic and he gets grouchy/tight-lipped if you push him too much

-Ambitions for the Future: Beyond finding a way to extricate the chip and keep both him and Johnny in one piece? He’d like to eventually make enough doing merc work to be able to just make a living fixing stuff. He’s a good mechanic and would love the time/financial stability to be able to work on his hobbies more. And if he was fantasizing? Finding somewhere that feels like home, and where he's safe

Layer 03: Thoughts

-First thought waking up: I don’t have nearly enough coffee for this (in the event he managed to actually sleep in the first place)

-What they think about most: Trying to keep himself alive and fed, in NC this is a constant job and requires a lot of vigilance

-What they think about right before bed: So much–they have terrible insomnia so post-sleep anxiety is fairly common.

-What they think their good quality is: They’re generous and have a strong moral compass–will occasionally not charge people for gigs despite the monetary loss, especially if it seems like he’d be taking advantage of the situation or it doesn’t feel right. He’s kind, even if he does come off as rather prickly.

Layer 04: Either Or

-Single or group dates: Depends on what his partner prefers. He’s not one to set up formal dates though. He’d rather just go out for a casual cup of coffee or a late night bike ride. He only realizes it’s a date after the fact, usually.

-To be loved or respected: He’d rather be loved. He’s seen where only wanting respect gets you and he’d rather not turn out like his corpo older brother

-Beauty or Brains: He definitely coasts by on intuition, luck and good looks at times so he’s a bit biased but in regards to a partner, it doesn’t matter much to him? A sense of empathy/loyalty are more important to him than either.

-Dogs or Cats: Cats! He loves them (and owns two–a Sphinx named Kira, and a black cat he’s dubbed Goro–as it seems to share the same look of general disapproval

Layer 05: Do They…

-Lie?: Yes, if it's to keep himself safe. He tries not to lie to friends or family though, especially if it's only for his own benefit.

-Believe in themselves?: It depends on who’s asking. They come off as very confident but it hides a lot of deeply rooted insecurity. They’re more sensitive than they like to let on.

-Believe in love?: A bit. They admire the idea of it but don’t think it’s for them. It’s something they secretly really crave though. -Want someone?: Yes--whether or not he stops being stubborn enough to admit it is another matter entirely.

Layer 06: Have They...

-Been on stage?: Yes, it’s a common thing (or at least, previously had been) and he’s fairly desensitized to it.

-Done drugs?: Tends to try really hard to stay away from them. Both his parents had issues with them and definitely played a role in their death. He uses airhypos/anasthetic grudgingly but that’s it.

-Changed who he was to fit in?: Not to fit in, per-se but to slide under the radar better. He knows that it’s safer going unnoticed in Night City most of the time and that’s the way he likes it. He’s good at putting on masks for people though. It takes a lot of patience, and a bit of a thick skin to get him to drop it and show facets of his real personality. He’s a lot softer than he first lets on though.

Layer 07: What's their...

-Favorite Color: He'll wear pretty much anything but leans towards black, blues, red and pink.

-Favorite Animal: He loves cats (and has two that he dotes on like his children)

-Favorite Book: It would be challenging to get him to admit it, but he can’t read very well, but he really enjoys when others read to him. Poetry is some of his favorite.

-Favorite Game: Not a game per-se but he’s really into racing. Bikes are a hobby of his and he’s damned good at it, and has very little fear (and more than a little recklessness). He also wouldn’t say no to a game of pool once in a while, particularly if he can rope his friends into a game of it. He's not fantastic at it, but has fun anyway.

-Day their next birthday will be: He doesn’t know his birthday so he decided on Oct. 31st.

-How old they will be: 25 (at least he thinks so)

Layer 08: I…

-I Love: The people I’ve let get close to me

-I Feel: Determined. We’ll find a way where we get to decide our future, whatever the cost.

-I Hide: My fears and ugly bits of my past. I don’t like letting other people know and making them worry. I don’t want their pity.

-I Miss: Jackie. There’s still a lot of guilt there.

-I Wish: We had more time, or at least a more clear solution. I feel adrift.

[softxsuki]

Hi, can I request a tokyo revengers and jujutsu kaisen matchup?

Pronouns/Preferred gender: My pronouns are she/her and my preferred romantic gender is leaning towards male.

Mbti/Zodiacs: my mbti type is infp. Leo sun, cancer moon, aquarius rising.

Personality: I act more a loof shy in public but once im comfortable around you I’m sarcastic, dorky, and chill.

What I value in friendships/relationships: Definitely loyalty and humor. Feeling that you’re cared for is a huge key too.

My type: I’m attracted to confidence and taller guys with a pretty face. Also tall women 🙂 but ofc, if someone doesn’t have these qualities that doesn’t mean I won’t date them.

My hobbies: I enjoy drawing/coloring and playing genshin impact. I love spending time with my cats and friends. But I do better with one on one hanging out, not a group.

Other details: One person I cannot live without is my best friend. But the problem is that we’re not really in sync right now and it’s stressing me out. I’ve been crying every night for a week since we had that argument.

I think I’d like a head canon on the characters you choose for me, comforting me and take care of me (romanticly). I tend to lose a lot of friends so I’m scared of losing more.

Thank you! Have a good day/evening!

1000 Follower Event Matchup #15

This event is CLOSED. You can check out the masterlist here.

Note: Here ya go. Hope you enjoy and sorry it's so late

I match you with CHIFUYU and YUUJI

Runner-ups were Mitsuya and Yuuta

Chifuyu:

When I tell you Chifuyu would make the best partner for you, I’m dead serious

HE ALWAYS has you on his mind–whenever he walks into a store, he’ll ask himself what’s something you’d like, so he can buy it for you, which THEN gives him a reason to see you that day

You play Genshin? Well guess what, now he does too. He’s always asking you to invite him to your world so you can play together. Or since you’re probably a higher level than him, he’d invite you to his world so you can help him level up faster

He’s always looking for ways to make you laugh and just smile in general–it’s his job to make sure you’re happy

How does he comfort you?

Since you mentioned your fear of losing friends, I’ll use that as my reference…

He’ll reassure you that you’re amazing and unlike anyone else out there. If people can’t see that in you and decide to unfriend you or drift away from you, then that’s their issue, because you’re perfect

He reminds you that before becoming your boyfriend, he was your friend and will always be there for you, so you never have to worry about him disappearing on you

Gives you lots of cuddles and lets you decide what to do for the day, whether it be staying home all day playing Genshin, or going out to get some comfort food and go on a nice relaxing walk

Chifuyu holds your hand a little tighter, wanting you to know he’s right by your side if you need him

He has lots of romance mangas of male leads that have comforted their s/o’s so one of those techniques will definitely come in handy

Yuuji:

We love a good golden retriever boyfie (i heard he’s a little different in the manga now, but i haven’t read it…so let’s just focus on anime Yuuji)

He has the loyalty and humor down packed–he’s so funny without even trying, and thankfully not in an annoying way where it gets to be too much; he’s a nice healthy balance of funny, caring, and serious

Yuuji LOVES when you draw. He could spend hours just watching you draw or color something; he’s always stunned by how talented you are

Expect him to ask you to draw him whenever he finds the opportunity to–if you say no, he’ll be pouty for the rest of the day

Gamer Yuuji? Sounds about right. He’d play Genshin with you and then he’ll introduce you to some of his own fav games

How does he comfort you?

When he finds out you’re feeling bad about a current friendship or scared that you’ll lose all your friends, his initial reaction is to get your mind off such thoughts

He’d definitely hear you out if you needed him to, but if talking about it immediately will make you feel worse, then he wants to just keep you happy for as long as possible and talk it out when the thought of your issue isn’t as fresh in your mind

Then he’d be a true loyal boyfriend and get mad at your “friends” who are making you feel this way and reassures you that anyone who doesn’t want to be your friend is “stupid”

He’s make an extra effort to spend more time with you and do all your favorite things to keep your mind from wandering to worries that’ll make you sad

EVENT REQUESTS ARE CLOSED

REGULAR REQUESTS ARE OPEN

Posted: 5/25/2023

[callsigndreadfrost]

OC Ask Game!! Send an OC and an emoji!

🌸- What's this OC's favorite and least favorite color? Favorite color is blue and least is #1d2118 (dark yellow green that sort of looks brown).

🌹- What's this OC's biggest fear? Losing his (found) family and reverting back to how he was. He’s worked very hard to get to where he currently is and reverting back full would just be the death of him.

🌷- How does this OC take their coffee? Iced or one spoonful of brown sugar with a sprinkle of cinnamon, whipped cream and a little bit of chocolate syrup over the whipped cream.

🌻- What's this OC's mental health state? Currently he’s doing great, actually better than he has in years. He’s been hard at work going to therapy, taking all his meds and putting in the work to better himself and keep himself as stable as possible.

🌼- What's your favorite thing about this OC? Everything. Both of us have grown so much over the years, he’s helped me out so much in discovering some stuff about myself and as I’ve discovered stuff about myself so has he. He’s my oldest OC, I’ve had him for 24 years.

🌺- Which family member (if any) is this OC closest to? His only blood family is his grandfather so basically him. But family overall he gets along with all of them and is closest to Jelani, his husband, Loke, Trevor and Ginger.

💐- Where is this OC's favorite place to relax? The apartment has a small porch that has a lot of plants and flowers he has gotten over the years and has arranged it in a way that the little garden surrounds a very comfy chair and a little coffee table. He makes himself some coffee, ice tea, smoothie, shake or some juice and takes his tablet, small speaker and spends some time there relaxing.

🌱- Does this OC have any pets? Do they have any pets they want? He currently has a black and white male Papillon named Sasha. In the future he’d like to have a big ol’ rat.

🌲- What is this OC's greatest strength and weakness? I think his greatest strength is his sympathy and empathy. As horrible as it is to say, his past has shaped him as a person and has made him very sympathetic to other people and makes him very willing and able to help others. The way he sees it, he didn’t have anyone to help so he’d want to be able to help others when they need it most.

Weakness is definitely his self-doubt. It can really paralyze him.

🌵- How does this OC feel about physical affection? Physical is actually his go to for showing affection. He’s a notorious hugger, he loves to hug a lot. When it comes to romantic relationships he’s all about showing affection through sex but if that’s not possible he likes having some sort of contact with his partner via hand holding, hugging, cuddling, kissing–anything physical.

🌴- Who is this OC's favorite person? (Can be another OC, a fictional character, a celebrity, anyone) His husband.

☘- Does this OC have any piercings? Do they want any? Yes, he does! He has a few actually.  Labret on the lower right side, three on each earlobe, helix on the right ear, industrial on the left ear, orbital on left ear, double middle tongue piercings, nipple piercings, belly button piercing, double outer labia, fourchette and lastly a pubic piercing (which was recently added to the list). He feels he has enough of them but he IS a big fan of genital piercings so we’ll see if he wants any more of them.

🍁- What's this OC's favorite genre of movies/tv shows/books/etc? Horror.

🌾- How does this OC get along with people they just met? He’s shy though he tries his hardest to be friendly and polite so as to not make others feel awkward.

🍀- Around when does this OC get up in the morning? Okay, he’s a werewolf and (Oracle) werewolves need a total of 3 to 4 hours of sleep only so he’ll fall asleep whenever he feels sleepy and be ready to go and fully rested 4 hours later. His sleep schedule is really random.

🍂- What music does this OC like? Industrial, aggrotech and metal.

🌳- Does this OC collect anything? Yes! Japanese teapots. He doesn’t drink tea but he loves these little pots so much. He only has five for now but he loves them so much. Stickers too! He loves stickers so much and has thousands saved up and even uses them too because what’s the point if you don’t use ‘em.

☀️- Does this OC make good or bad first impressions? He tries his best to make a good impression but he’s aware that not everyone is gonna like him. For the most part he makes a good impression.

🌙- Does this OC have any unusual hobbies? Honestly, no. I don’t think any of his hobbies are weird.

🌟- Is this OC good at expressing themself through words or do they have to use other means? No, he isn’t. He’s much better at writing out or texting out his feelings. He’s working on it in therapy and at the very least with Jelani, Loke and Trevor he can verbally express himself better. He’s been known to go mute for long periods of time and he and Trevor formed a way to communicate when he does that and he feels so safe being able to do that and have Trevor to communicate with and given the fact that Jelani knows him so well he doesn’t need him to talk in order for him to understand him and gives him enough security to let him start talking again when he feels like it.

🌈- What does this OC like and dislike about themselves? He’s super proud and likes the way he physically looks. He takes care of himself and actually works on himself. As much progress as he’s made he really hates how, no matter what, he’ll forever have a number of mental illnesses thanks to his abusers. If he could he’d get rid of them and never have to worry if something will trigger a bad memory, if a sound will make him remember something bad. He wishes he didn’t have to take meds just to help him. He used to not take his meds until Jelani told him it was just to help him, most of the work to recovery was done by him and since then he’s been very okay with taking them. In a way he’s aware that he’s come a long way and he’s proud of that too.

❄- What is this OC's favorite and least favorite food? Favorite are steamed dumplings. Least are lettuce and broccoli.

☁️- What is this OC's clothing style like? He cross-dresses so he wears a lot of women’s clothes. Anything cute and playful (example 1, example 2, example 3). He’ll dress in men’s clothes too but unless he’s on the clock he’ll give it a feminine spin.

⚡- How well does this OC sleep? Heavy sleeper and tends to get a good night’s sleep.

💧- What is this OC most passionate about? Like other OCs he’s very outspoken and passionate about LGBTQ+ rights but given the fact that he’s intersex he’s passionate about intersex rights a bit louder. He does what he can to educate others on the subject. As a Moomborne he speaks out a lot for werewolves to come together more as a community instead of being so far apart from each other and is especially passionate about eliminating prejudices between werewolf breeds.  

🍃- Describe this OC in one word: Soft.

[sweetmusingss]

I smile when hearing what Renee said, glancing over at you fondly. “I love his name. It’s not often that you hear the name ‘Sebastian’. I call him his full name sometimes too and don’t worry, he still scolds me about it but I like saying it,” I admit, a blush on my cheeks. I smile softly at Alexandra, thanking her kindly for the toy and sitting beside her. I couldn’t help but glance over at you and Noah. Seeing how good you were with my son just made me fall harder for you. Just because we were dating didn’t mean that I expected you to want to get to know my son. However, you did and it meant so much to me. “She’s adorable,” I say to Renee and Chris, holding her stuffed toy carefully and watching her as she colored. “Give Noah a moment and he’ll be wanting to play with her too,” I laugh a bit.

Chris watches curiously as you held Noah, never seeing you with any kid that wasn’t Alexandra. He knew that you were usually annoyed by kids in general but he could see you had a soft spot for another child now. 

I smile when seeing that Noah was ready to get down and I watch as he ran over, catching him as he plopped right down on my lap. “Sorry he’s all over the place, he gets that from me,” I laugh softly as I glanced back over at Chris and Renee. “It’s nice to finally meet you both though. I’ve heard so much about you and your daughter.”

Seb rolled his eyes as you mentioned that you loved his full name, shaking his head as he lets Noah down, watching fondly as he rushed over to you on his little legs. “It’s just that I’m used to my mother using my full name when she was scolding me so it just sends a wave of terror through me everytime. But I definitely like it more coming from you, Katie, than from the queen of shrill over here.” He motions towards Renee, ignoring the scoff that she threw back at him. Seb flushed when you said that you had heard a lot about his friends, hating for them to think that he talked about them all the time even though he did. “I rant and rave about Alex all the time... not so much you two, of course.”

“God no, why would you ever say nice things about your best friends?” Renee teases Seb before walking over to you and sitting next to you on the floor, her legs on either side of her daughter, pulling her long hair back and starting to braid it. “I’ve been dying to meet you, you know... I’m such a fan and I promise to try to keep it normal but I’m totally starstruck being here with you right now. Chris told me to be on my best behavior and I’m really gonna try but this is like if Tom Brady walked in the door... he’d lose his mind and I’m really trying to keep it together.” 

__

Frank smirks back at you when hearing what you said, loving this feisty side of you. He had told you to 'be nice’ before but now that he saw how Evelyn was, he was taking it back. She deserved to have some fear in her and some attention taken off of her. He hated people who acted pretentious and overly spoiled. That was exactly how she was acting and he was already annoyed by her. He loved that you were indirectly snubbing her and her big, fancy wedding. He glanced back at you with a soft expression, hardly paying attention to your step-sister at this point. “Yeah but I can’t think of what would make me more excited to be your husband than being at a wedding,” he says, sighing dreamily as he held your gaze. “Nothing about my feelings for you are simple,” he says, really hamming it up and making a show of it, keeping his arm wrapped tightly around you. It felt good to actually touch someone, not having realized how much he missed human contact until now. 

I just smile up at him, letting out a dreamy sigh as well, “God, I love hearing you refer to yourself as my husband. Makes me all warm and fuzzy inside.” I giggle, leaning up and kissing his cheek, letting my lips linger against his skin for a bit longer than necessary before looking back towards Evelyn, internally cheering at the sight of her unhappiness. “Like I said, Ev, we aren’t going to rain on your parade or steal your thunder. We’re happy for you... it just reminds us how excited we are for our future, too.”

Evelyn was silently seething, glaring at the two of us. She had seen me with my ex, Jared or whatever his name was, and she thought we were obnoxious but that was nothing compared to this. How dare I talk about getting married when she was about to do the same in the next few days? She hated not being the center of attention and from how in love we looked, she was terrified that we’d steal that limelight when it came to her father and my mother. “Well, your future can begin on Sunday. Live in the present for now. This is about me.” She snaps at me, letting that fake gracious host mask slip for just a moment before she was smiling fakely at us. “So nice to meet you, Frank. I’ll see you two around.” She leans in and gives me a very quick and half-assed hug before she was rushing away to get doted on by someone else.

I watch as she disappears into the crowd, looking up at Frank. “That was epic, man. That was so good. I thought just our outfits would annoy her but she is totally pissed off. God, you’re amazing... husband.” I giggle, leaning up and rubbing our noses together cutely, knowing Evelyn was probably still watching from wherever she was. “Let's go get really drunk now, yeah? We’re gonna need it to deal with my mom whenever she spots us.”

[howlsofbloodhounds]

If Color and Killer ever had a fight/argument, what do you think would have caused it? If killer did something that made color annoyed or,,, idk actually

Killer is a bitch, a heavily traumatized mentally ill disordered bitch. I’m sure there’s been a lot of fights and arguments, especially in the beginning. 2 was definitely uh. violent, manipulative, threatening. likely vulgar and provocative (as in the causing anger and annoyance on purpose way.) especially if we go with the idea that he was planning to play along and be friends with color to gain access to his six souls at first.

especially since killers also a massively paranoid distrusting bitch.

He’s not a complete angel in 1 either. Mood swings, emotional outbursts, intense emotions and numbness, frequently dissociated or numbed out if not in the verge of a breakdown, intense fears of abandonment and rejection and feeling unworthy of anything good or nice. likely allowing things to happen or not doing things he should (defending himself, defending someone else, etc) out of fear that making the wrong choice means he’ll lose his good ending and it’ll all reset again and nothing will matter again.

An excessive sense of dependence on color and his judgments and his choices, avoiding and distrusting others fearfully potentially to the point he wouldn’t even want to leave their house and wouldn’t be able to handle having other people over either without panicking and breaking down—probably a lot of flashbacks to all the times of what happened the last times he was surrounded by people in enclosed spaces.

A lot of this may be mostly inward but his refusal and inability to communicate is what leads to repression leads to dissociation leads to the more outward behaviors in higher Stages.

(For example: the whole blood orange duo rivalry is fueled by insecurities that Stage 1 is too afraid and scared to acknowledge or say or talk about. (Of course. Look what happened anytime he might’ve tried.)

Stage 2 might allow detachment from the overwhelm and provide a sense of control and logic, but those insecurities and jealousies are funneled into a more viscous and territorial mindset and a lack of care for morals or “going too far” and an indifference for consequences.

Stage 1 might be horrified by the way he thinks and behaves in Stage 2, but it would only play into his sense of powerlessness and learned helplessness. He’d still feel deeply ashamed but at the same time he’s still afraid of Delta, of everyone, and he’s bitter. At least when he’s like that he’s strong enough to fight for Color, is probably what he thinks, even if he’s afraid that he’ll take it too far and lose Color anyway.)

Potential neediness and clinginess to the point it can become overbearing and suffocating. excessively hiding information about himself and keeping secrets out of fear and shame and guilt and worry of what color would think of him if he knew the full extent of everything he’s done both under nightmare and with Chara.

(He hid something as dangerous and violent as Stage 4 from Color out of shame and fear, and tried to say Color’s only options would be killing him if he ever went into Stage 3. Pretty awful position to put someone who’s trying to help you in.

And its also a pretty shitty thing to go around asking people to kill you (color, that one lil comic with swap at the end as a sorta joke that i posted on like TikTok but can’t find anymore) even if its understandable that he’s not in a good state of mind.)

And Color is a patient man but he’s still a dude who’s also known for emotional outbursts—especially when he was in the Void. He’s gonna have to actively choose to exercise patience and understanding with Killer, as they both will, and try help him even understand why he believes and behaves and reacts the way he does, what he’s feeling and why—and in a way that doesn’t make Killer feel forced or trapped. Communication is going to be hard when is requires vulnerability and openness.

Colors probably gonna have to deal with a lot of killer accusing and insinuating a whole lot of unpleasant nasty things about him and his motives and his character.

[paradisetemporarilymisplaced]

So I was being a basic bitch the other day and listening to my true crime podcasts when it occurred to me just how suspicious Nile’s “death” would look to everyone not in the Guard, leading me to a train of thought that, 2200 words later, absolutely got away from me but I can’t let go so I’m inflicting it on all of you!

To set the stage, we know the movie takes place over approximately a week. Here’s what happens to Nile from the military’s point of view:

She dies is very seriously injured

She heals without a scratch

Just before she’s supposed to be shipped out to Germany, she vanishes, leaving two men concussed (and presumably reporting being knocked out by a woman with short hair wearing civilian clothes)

She goes AWOL for several days

They get word from the CIA that she is to be reported killed in action (details unclear)

So, at the beginning of this very weird week, the USMC has to tell Nile’s family of her death critical injury. What her family was told depends on how long she was dead – a Google search tells me that family will be notified in person within 8 hours of a soldier’s death, but we don’t know how long her first death lasted. For an injury, however, they’d get a phone call to notify them and the unit would arrange for them to visit as soon as the soldier is transferred out of a combat zone. Like I remember when I was in high school, a guy from my church who was a Marine was really seriously injured in a helicopter crash in Iraq and from what I could tell, his parents were told immediately and were flown out to Germany to see him, so it stands to reason that Nile’s family would have been informed relatively quickly after her throat was slashed, one way or another.

And then, she goes AWOL. Her family would be notified while the USMC tried to figure out where she went, not least because the military would want to know if she’s contacted them. (And it’s possible that her family may have been on the way to Germany to see her since we know that’s where she was supposed to go!) So for several days:

Nile’s mom and brother have no idea where she is

They know she was seriously injured and most certainly should not have been moving around on her own

They can’t get a hold of her

The military can’t tell them anything

And the next thing they know for sure is that she was “killed in action.” After being injured and vanishing into thin air. And they presumably cannot produce her body or any concrete evidence of her death. In any case, something sketchy is going on, so they’re like. SMELLS LIKE A MILITARY COVERUP.

In a surprise to probably no one, there is a well-documented legacy of mysterious US military deaths, particularly of women of color (TW for sexual assault in these links). The cases of LaVena Johnson and Vanessa Guillenin particular have made national news because of their families’ persistence in seeking justice. Likewise, Nile is a Black woman, and her mom and brother are most certainly hypercognizant of (a) state violence against Black people and (b) these high-profile cases of suspicious military deaths. So her family are seriously side-eyeing the situation, knowing that (a) the military has a serious incentive (and a documented history) of covering up things that make them look bad and (b) nothing about Nile’s disappearance and supposed death are adding up.

And Andy’s right. Nile does come from warriors. And you know who else does? Her brother.

Don’t get me wrong. Nile’s mom would absolutely not back down. She’d know something was up and want to get to the bottom of it. But based on what I know about Gen X parents (mine), they’re not the most technologically savvy. Like they can use the internet, but they didn’t grow up with it the way we young millennials and Gen Z did. So Nile’s brother takes the lead. And what do zillennials do best?

Social media.

Nile’s brother starts going hard on any site he can, trying to get the word out to see if anyone knows what happened to his sister. He starts a Reddit thread. He starts a Facebook group. He reaches out to the media and true crime bloggers and podcasters à la Sarah Turney, getting loud and being a general nuisance in hopes of getting some answers. He gets his friends and Nile’s friends involved. Maybe eventually Dizzy, Jay, and others from Nile’s unit hear about it and reach out, telling him what they saw and how weird it all was. He’s drumming up interest, and soon “Nile Freeman” becomes a household name (at least among the true crime fans).

Copley is, of course, trying his best, but at this point there is just so much that it’s impossible for him to scrub everything. Sure, he can erase new footage of Nile and the Guard, but what can he do about Reddit threads and podcast episodes that are speculating something weird has happened? Maybe he could hack the sites and shut those things down, but honestly, that’s the last thing he’d want to do, because that only adds weight to the theory that Nile’s disappearance is a military coverup. So eventually he has to tell Andy what’s going on.

Andy, obviously, does not take the news well. However, she is also completely computer illiterate, because that’s Booker’s job and he’s the only one who ever bothered to learn what the internet is in any meaningful way. (She probably calls Booker for advice, and for the record, I think Booker would have no qualms about shutting down conspiracy threads, tinhats be damned, but Copley is too concerned about the consequences. He’s ex-CIA for crying out loud, he knows how it’ll look if they scrub every mention of Nile’s name from the internet.) Maybe she confers with Joe and Nicky but, let’s be honest, they’d be equally unhelpful. So at this point, she knows they have to bring in Nile.

But the thing about Nile is that she, too, knows how to use the internet (duh). Aside from her being a young millennial/digital native, we know from the cave scene where she’s giving Booker suggestions on how to track Copley that she clearly is even more computer savvy than the average person. And for that reason she almost definitely took over the day-to-day tech stuff after Booker’s exile. So I think it would be foolish to expect her to be unaware of what’s happening. She’s not contacting her family or posting on the message boards or anything, but she knows what’s up. So Copley and the team probably sit her down to “break the news,” but we know the girl does not have a poker face (see: literally shooting herself in the foot and not being able to play it cool whatsoever) and cracks immediately, telling them she’s seen everything about her case – she’s not interacting with any of it, she certainly didn’t instigate anything, but she knows. (And she is so goddamn proud of her brother.)

At this point, I’d like to pause and consider Nile’s role in the overall narrative of this movie. She’s set up as a foil to Andy, obviously, but she’s also a foil to Booker. Booker, who, like Andy, is a serious pessimist, but who, unlike Andy, still has very fresh memories and trauma associated with being the new kid, which have destroyed him. In his mind (and Andy’s), if Nile communicates with her family, she’ll become just like him in a century or two – bitter, alone, and stuck with her grief and memories of watching her family die and knowing they died resenting her. It’s a small sample size, but this is the only experience they have to go off of.

But it doesn’t have to be like that.

There’s been a lot of discussion of TOG being a fundamentally queer movie – a group of people brought together because of something inherent about themselves that is different, that must be hidden, that causes others to hate, fear, and reject them. Booker’s backstory is the archetypal traumatic “coming out” story – his family learns who he is, hate him for it, and attempt to cast him out of their lives. He’s stuck with his trauma, his pain, his loss, and it consumes him.

But what if Nile’s family would be the opposite? What if her “coming out” to them as immortal is met with acceptance, love, celebration? What if her family is just overjoyed to have her back, and they don’t care what the circumstances are? I'm reminded of this incredible post from @shitty-old-guard-deaths a while back, where Nile’s mother hits Booker with a frying pan because “my baby let me believe she was dead for FIVE YEARS based on your bad advice???” (which may or may not have inspired this whole tangent). Nile takes the advice of someone who did the same thing she wants to do because she doesn’t want to risk her family’s rejection. She wants the good memories with her family and is afraid that showing them her true self will bring her unbearable pain, forever replacing those memories. But, with high risk comes high reward.

Anyway. Nile and the team are trying to come up with a plan for how to handle this whole thing, but she’s not really participating because she’s too afraid to hope. Until finally, quickly, so she doesn’t lose her nerve, she suggests she reach out to them, knowing that, realistically, that’s the only solution before things snowball even further out of control. The team is shocked, but realize that she has a point. They decide that Copley should actually be the first point of contact, posing as a US government official to talk with them and test the waters.

So Copley goes to Nile’s family’s house to talk with her mom and brother. They’re probably distrustful and apprehensive, but nonetheless secretly ecstatic that their work has paid off. They talk and review all of the information that they’ve collected, including testimonials from the people on Nile’s base and recent sightings (along with photos) of Nile (with the same three people) over the last few years that people have sent them but they haven’t posted publicly. At this point, Copley’s like, yeah this is about to blow up, we gotta put our cards on the table. He convinces them to come with him to some safe house/black site/whatever he can get that is technologically impenetrable (I’m picturing them in like, an interrogation room at a police station kind of deal), takes their phones, locks the doors, and brings in Nile.

What follows is the most delightful reunion scene of all time, bringing Joe, Nicky, and even Andy to tears as they watch and listen from outside the room. With Copley’s help, Nile tells her mom and brother about her immortality and what’s been going on since she died (within reason, of course), and they are thrilled. They don’t understand why (because no one does) but they don’t question it and they see it as a gift from God – she’s been resurrected, she will live, and she has a purpose. Her mother and brother are so happy to see her again and are willing to agree with pretty much anything to stay in her life as long as they can.

So. They set up some complicated agreement (they bring in the other three for support/intimidation as needed) setting the terms of their relationship. They swear Nile’s family to secrecy, maybe bringing up the lab to show how high the stakes are, and they readily agree. They come up with some cover story for Nile’s brother to share on the message boards (maybe that the government has opened an investigation but because it’s an open case he has to shut it all down? Tells people to direct their tips somewhere else? Something to that effect). There’s still speculation, of course, but without Nile’s brother at the helm providing the energy, the hype dies down as news stories are wont to do without any movement. And Nile’s family goes to work for the team. The experience has taught them that Copley can’t possibly do everything himself, especially when it comes to social media, so Nile’s brother takes the lead on the day-to-day tracking/social media while Copley and her mom focus on finding jobs and scrubbing their traces afterward.

So there you have it: Nile gets to integrate her biological family into her found family and spend the rest of their lives with them as it should be, Copley gets some badly needed help managing the reality of social media, the team finally has a positive narrative surrounding outsiders Knowing About Them AND about interacting with people from their previous life, and the audience gets the happy ending to this very lovely and very queer story to counteract the pain associated with Booker’s family.

Plus, you know, I’m a sucker for both a good government conspiracy theory and for Nile getting every good thing she deserves.

[maschotch]

if you have headcanons about jack growing up and how his relationship with hotch ends up i would love to hear it

i think a significant aspect of jack’s transition to adulthood is the process of unraveling his father’s trauma. alkjsdh it’s unfortunate to be stifled by a burden that shouldn’t be his own, but so much about hotch is related to wounds inflicted over the years that he never cared to fully heal. as much as he hates it, it’s inevitable that at least some of it would affect his son. he may be reluctant to address any of it, much less reveal it to his son, but i like to think hotch is a caring enough father to battle his inner demons for jack’s sake. adolescence is difficult enough—hotch’s refusal to recover would drastically impact his son’s life for the worse

for most of the show jack idolized his dad a ridiculous amount akshjdlgakj like it was definitely some media magic how much that boy loved his dad. it was for the sake of keeping hotch on the show—it’s more acceptable for hotch to traipse around catching killers if his son is ok with him being gone all the time (they do a similar thing with matt and his family). and fine, whatever, i’m alright w that. its a clean and easy way to sweep that load of potential problems under the rug. but thats what makes it so much worse when jack Does start to have issues. its heartbreaking that the last time we see hotch and jack, theyre not really on speaking terms 

its not like hotch didnt see this coming. as much as id like to see him drowning in misery ashdgljad he’s more practical than self deprecating. he knows what to expect as a child develops, he knows the adoring way his son looks at him will take a sharp turn eventually. at some point all kids realize that their parents arent gods, arent heroes, arent perfect, and that they make mistakes. and they start to resent them. and hotch knows more than anyone that jack has so much to resent him for 

witness protection will bring up a lot of painful memories for both of them—maybe ones jack had forgotten about since he was so young. but repeating the same pattern, having his life ripped away and relying on a parent for any sense of stability, has got to be triggering for him. he’s gotta be overwhelmed with conflicting emotions: anger at hotch’s past failures, fear of his remaining parent being taken the same way his mom was. while it sucks for jack aksjhdglj that fear would stop him from cutting hotch off completely, no matter how much jack blames him for

he’s around 10 when we see him last, so he’s hitting his teenage angst a little early, but i think it’s fitting that he gets it out of the way. the very real very present danger will force them to confront issues both of them might otherwise suppress. they only have each other to rely on so they have to clear the air eventually. but i think there’s a lot of stumbling along the way: the sharp venom of vindictiveness has to hit its target a few times before jack’s satisfied, even if he knows it’s unfair. he’s just a kid. forced to mature faster than others, but he can still be petty. he needs to make hotch hurt because he’s young and feels betrayed by his own foolish admiration of a foolish man just as capable of mistakes as anyone

hotch understands. he blames himself just as much if not more for haley’s death. but i think hotch’s acceptance of jack’s anger would only make things worse. he’d react the way haley would (which is extra fun for hotch kajhlfdjg). he’ll be upset that hotch wont defend himself, that hotch won’t deny anything or fight back. that’s because jack, privy to a world broader than he once realized, needs to process the shock of losing veneration for his father before he can come to terms with any sort of sympathetic reasoning of events. he lived his childhood from the rose tinted perspective of absolute trust: he has to see things in black and white before accepting that there are colors beyond that

again, hotch knows all this. he knows it will be a while before jack’s willing to accept any explanation—and that’s if hotch is even willing to provide one. jack may not get the full picture, but hotch might feel like sharing his side of the story would just be hiding behind excuses. i imagine if he ever did, it wouldn’t be planned or thought out at all. likely it’s just jack asking questions during a fragile moment and hotch cant bring himself to deny his son anything 

with a direct confrontation, hotch decides it's time to be honest with his son. he wishes he had more time to prepare; jack may be ready but HE’S certainly not ready for this conversation yet, even if he knew it was coming. but he has to think of jack first, the way he’s always tried to. and this is what jack needs now. not excuses or defenses, just honest explanation: a confession of all his weaknesses and failings. the insecurities and doubts. he doesnt want to overwhelm the kid, but jack deserves an explanation of the truth of it all. he talks about what his job meant for him and why he was so devoted to it. he talks about foyet and how it was the fault of a man, not a monster, but including the choices hotch made to get them to that point and why he’s still guilty for it. he talks about the healthy and unhealthy ways to cope with loss and grief and negativity. how you’re not supposed to let it take over your life or liet it control you. how it’s a lesson hotch hasn’t quite learn himself. but how he doesn’t want jack to end up like him. how he wants jack to be better, how he wants the world for him, how everything he does is for his sake, even if he makes mistakes along the way. how hotch isnt a hero, he’s just a man. and man isnt perfect. 

i imagine he’s around 12-14 when they have this conversation? jack’s already had to deal with so much and hotch doesnt want him growing up with all those questions burning up inside. he knows jack’s young so he simplifies it a little and leaves out some of the darker stuff (like the extent of his injuries during foyet’s attack and the role hotch’s own childhood plays in all this). but jack doesnt want to be treated like a child anymore. hotch is aware that transparency is what will save their relationship.

things go a little smoother after that. jack will still have his teenage mood swings, he’ll snap at his dad, making some hateful but misdirected comments. but he’ll be more understanding. he’ll say sorry faster, knowing a little more about how his words may affect his father. 

hotch of course worries that he’s said too much too soon. he doesn’t want to overburden him with all of his fucking baggage. but it’s kind of an inescapable part of being a parent. their circumstances just happened to call for it earlier than it shouldve been. but it helps hotch too. bc now that he’s explained the problems that he has and the things he’s continuing to work through, he feels more obligated to actually work on himself and show that progress can be made. he wants to set a good example. 

i dont think it's until much later that hotch talks about his own experiences growing up. it's not a part of his life he ever planned on sharing—not with anyone, much less his son. but jack is 17-19 and just as quick as his father. he can put the pieces together and has some idea of what happened, vague as it may  be. hotch is more subtle than some of the others about the impact his childhood has left on him, but jack has grown up needing to read between the lines to truly understand his father’s feelings: jack can read hotch better than most others because he’s grown up with him. he’s more comfortable being open with his dad now, he’s more willing to ask difficult questions. their relationship is strong and he’s sure it’ll take whatever this conversation leaves them with. they’ll make it. so jack sits with his dad at the table and asks his questions. hotch has barely talked about this with anyone before and he doesnt want to frighten his child with it, even if he’s more of an adult now than hotch is willing to admit. but jack is firm and determined. he thinks he can kelp his father somehow (and god. that just kills hotch. to think that his son is so worried for him. loving and kind, but still naive). taking deep breaths and willing himself not to break down, he begins to answer

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

I'm sorry but i'm addicted to our boy Spamton- I have a little unique request here. So this takes place where Spamton just moves in the Queen's mansion, he meets the reader and immediately falls for their kind words and gestures. Weeks pass, and he goes to see them, but catches them talking and hanging out with Swatch.. He gets really jealous to the point of changing his style to match Swatch's

"Oh [y/n]! Have You Met Our Newest Guest?"

"Uh, I don't believe-"

"He's An Interesting Addison Who Made A Big Name For Himself! Ohohoho!" Queen laughed joyously, pausing to sip her glass of battery acid. "I Wonder How He Got So Rich...No Matter. As My Peon, I Order You Greet Him......Whenever It's Convenient For You."

"Sure thing. I'll go now." With a respectful nod, you set off to the mansion's guest chambers to meet this newcomer. You've lived here for a long time--and somewhat reluctantly since Queen decided to make you one of her peons one day. But life was actually pretty good.

It wasn't like you had anything better to do, so if she needed someone to help her with plans that..didn't seem all-that urgent, you'll offer your assistance. She let you stay in the mansion for free and never made you do anything if you weren't feeling up to it.

For a tyrannical ruler she was rather kind.

Yet you didn't wanna take advantage of her hospitality, so you'd just listen to whatever she says. And if she wants you to meet this celebrity as part of her endless lists of requests, then you'll happily oblige. But you were eager too since you've seen his face on TV a lot. It felt like an honor.

After wandering the corridors of deactivated puzzles, Mona Lisa-esque portraits, and meticulously-placed pottery, you finally arrived at the guest rooms. You hummed a small tune as you passed by each one, stopping when you noticed one door was open.

Peeking inside, you saw the Addison still setting up things. A phone was tucked between his shoulder and ear as he moved a box whilst rambling to whoever was on the other end of the line.

"Yea! I promise I won't let you down, okay? Soon I'll be bigger than ever before! I know I'm already a big shot but....haha, yeah, I shouldn't get carried away. Okay. Right..we'll discuss more of this tomorrow. Thanks!"

After hanging up the phone and returning it to the receiver, he finally noticed you and smiled. "Hey, hey! Haven't seen your face around here yet. But surely you know mine, right?"

"Yeah." You smiled, not wanting to shy away from talking with him. "Spamton, right?"

"Everybody's favorite number-one rated salesman!!" He laughed. "It's good you know me..'cuz soon ALL of Cyber World will know my name! It's a pleasure to meet you...?"

"[Y/n]. I'm one of Queen's peons." You shook his hand politely. The energy that radiated from him was so bright. Just as much as his pearly smile was.

Stepping inside, you glanced around at the luxurious furniture. He definitely got the higher-class rooms, with the addition of a large window that showed the neon green meridians that stretched across the night sky. It was certainly a beautiful view to fall asleep to. "Need help unpacking?"

"Oh--sure!!" At first Spamton seemed surprised by your offer, but he nodded. "If you want, be my guest. And while we unpack, I gotta ask you..how's it being Queen's peon?"

............

Weeks passed, and you've gotten to know Spamton more and more. You realized he was actually a sweet down-to-earth guy all around. Although he was on the phone a lot, he'd make time to hang out with you, so you two became fast friends.

He was truly living the best life. Posters of his car advertisements were littered all over the city, and the Swatchlings attended to his every need. Though one thing was hard to admit, even when it seemed like he had it all:

You were his only friend now that everyone else is intimidated by his status--as they would shy away from conversing with him--and the Addisons, well, abandoned him out of jealousy.

Obviously that made him worry about driving you away, especially when he's on the phone nonstop. But...the fact you've been so kind to him in every word and gesture, treating him like a regular person and not some untouchable celebrity, was quite endearing. Most admired him for his products, not his personality.

Your kindness made him fall for you hard and fast, ever since day one. He wasn't sure if this was a good idea; to let it get in the way of his business.

But what the hell? He was a big shot! He can afford to go a bit bigger and take more risks. Living in this mansion with someone who loved him would be the perfect dream.

There was a much bigger dream that his valued caller insisted he focused on, but that can come later.

So this morning, Spamton set out to find you to address these feelings once and for all. Yet he was rather nervous. Addisons were most confident in selling products, not so much...everything else. But he didn't wanna back down. He kept smiling no matter what.

As he checked inside the color café that he usually frequented, he saw you eating at the table. He noticed you weren't alone but with Swatch, talking and...

Laughing with them?

And just like that, his smile faded much like his hope.

Of course, the head butler had their ways to swoon people. He tried not to think of it as anything more than just their personality. It's just their way to entice returning customers.

That's all...right?

Spamton ducked behind one of the displays, listening in on your conversation to determine if he should proceed or not.

"By the way, we've known each other for a while and..I've always wanted to ask you something.."

"Yes? What is your inquiry?"

He held his breath. This is exactly what he feared. Knowing that you've been here longer, it's obvious you'd be closer to that damn bird-

"Your outfit."

Then he exhaled shakily, relieved. 'What are you getting so worked up for, idiot?' He thought in the back of his mind, but he continued eavesdropping.

"Did the Queen make it or give it to you? It's very stylish and really makes you stand out from the other Swatchlings."

"Ah, in fact I decided this look for myself." Swatch chuckled softly, raising a wing to adjust their glasses. "The tailor did marvelous work with my vision: black suit, tinted glasses. Very fashionable, is it not?"

"It is. I like it a lot."

"Why thank you. I see why our Lady Grace admires you. Just for that compliment, I'll give you a discount on any of our products in the gift shop."

"Should be every day if you ask me." You joked, earning another chuckle from them.

Seeing all of this and the way you two spoke like close friends was a jab in Spamton's heart-shaped object. 'So [y/n] likes people who stand out? Well I can stand out, too..' He thought bitterly as he stormed out of the shop without either of you knowing he was there.

Why should he settle with being a blank-slate Addison like the rest of them? He didn't consider himself one anymore.

Today, he told his valued caller, he was gonna be a whole new person.

It would help him get closer to both of his dreams, but there was only one on his mind now.

............

Later that night as you were getting ready for bed, you heard a knock at the door. You huffed in annoyance, assuming Queen needed you for something.

She had a knack for disturbing you at ungodly hours. But knowing better than to ignore her, you went to answer the door anyways-

To some strange black-haired guy in a black suit and white turtleneck sweater.

"Hi, um...can I help you?"

"[Y/n]? It's me."

"....wait....Spamton?"

"Yeah!" The salesman laughed, throwing his arms out and making a pose. "Whatdya think of me now?"

Perplexed, you looked him up and down. He ditched the lime-green pants, instead wearing white trousers. And his hair was slicked back. But what was most peculiar about him were his glasses, tinted with pink and yellow lenses.

Had you not known any better, you would've thought Swatch suddenly shrunk and became robotized.

"Cool but..you kinda look like Swatch a little bit. Was that on purpose?" You mused.

"...haha....yeah uh..funny story. Um.." He dropped the act, losing his trademark grin as he wondered how to explain himself and this sudden transformation. You could tell he wanted to talk inside the room, so you let him in and shut the door.

"I don't recall Queen mentioning any costume contest-"

"It's not a costume." He muttered, uncomfortably rubbing his hands together as he looked at you with sadness. "This is who I am now. The new me."

"..huh? You serious?" When he nodded, you frowned slightly. "I'm confused. You don't look like an Addison anymore-"

"That's the point...! I...I don't wanna be associated with them anymore. I decided to stand out, y'know? If you're gonna be a big shot, ya gotta stand out from the crowd!" He forced a laugh that sounded rather glitchy.

You didn't buy it. It wasn't like him to do this out of the blue.

"Spamton, why imitate Swatch of all people? And why out of the blue like this? I mean..I don't mind if you like their style. But I didn't even recognize you until you spoke."

Try as he might, he couldn't make any better excuses. So seeing that he was cornered made him finally admit his jealousy, overhearing your conversation with Swatch while he was browsing--when he really wasn't, but he didn't wanna come off as creepy.

His voice glitched further due to stress, accidentally blurting out some kind of...flirtatious term as he explained how much you meant to him since day one.

You weren't sure if he meant to say "hot single" on purpose. Though you were flattered that such a famous guy like him...actually had a crush on you, an ordinary Darkner who just fetched the Queen's stick wherever she threw it.

You found it hard to believe he thought of you that way..so you kept your own feelings buried. So to see that it's mutual was a relief, and it made you smile.

Spamton, on the other hand, was stressing the hell out. So much so he didn't even see your smile. He just saw himself being stupid the more he rambled on.

It was such a stupid, stupid reason to get insecure--to the point of changing his entire appearance without warning. All because you were friends with a butler who was doing their job???

How selfish can he get when he already had everything he wanted and more?

When he did acknowledge your small smile, he thought you were holding yourself back from laughing. But you had every right to laugh and call him a joke for thinking this will get your attention.

As he finished talking, he could see your smile fade and huffed. He waited for you to tell him how stupid he looks and to go back to being the plain old Addison you met.

Instead of ridiculing him you...hugged him?

At this point you were sitting on the bed together. Of course yours wasn't as massive as his was, but it was big enough for you two to share.

"Spammy, I'm flattered you like me in that way but...you didn't have to do all of this to get my attention. I promise there's nothing going on between Swatch and I. We're just friends. They're not replacing you or anything."

"I know, it's just.." Taking off the glasses, he set them aside before hugging you tightly, head buried in your chest. "I don't wanna lose the only person in this damn place who makes me feel like myself. Who loves me for me, not my success. And...I-I felt like I had to change something about myself to make sure of that."

"Well..you don't need to change anymore. I love you no matter what you look like."

He blinked, his face turning as red as his cheeks.

You could sense his embarrassment from the way he tensed up in your arms and chuckled, patting his hair softly. "Just..don't feel pressured to change for me..or anybody for that matter, okay? Or at least let me know if you're gonna change things up again."

"You don't think..I look stupid or creepy like this?"

"No. Honestly you look pretty handsome. Black hair suits you well."

Hearing those words made him breathe a small sigh of relief. He nodded and hugged you tighter.

His new looks were staying for good.

[redrobin-detective]

The late Daniel Fenton

It was shaping up to be a beautiful if chilly December day and Casper High, as always, was bustling. It was 7:49 and class was about to start. The teacher watched the last few kids stumbling in at various levels of wakefulness. He already knew who would be the ones to rush in after the bell but that was alright. Life was too short to stress about being a few minutes late to class, especially in Amity Park of all places.

He looked up to see Madison, one of his shyer students walk in before making a beeline for his desk. She was biting her lip and nervously rubbing her hand down her skirt. “Hey,” she began quietly.

“Good morning. What’s up, Mads?” He asked casually. She looked upset, he could probably put on a video for the class if she needed to talk. They really needed a permanent counselor but the constant ghost attacks ran off most of them so he’d taken up the unofficial mantle. It felt good to help his students like that, make up for past wrongs.

“Are we um, expecting any new students?” She asked, her eyes darting over to the door she’d just come through. “Any transfers, exchange students or anything like that?”

“No,” the teacher frowned. “Amity isn’t the kind of place people transfer into. Why?”

“There’s a kid in the hallway,” she mumbled. “I don’t recognize him, he’s got a backpack and everything but he’s... I don’t know he doesn’t feel right.”

“Oh you’re talking about that weird dark haired kid,” Kyle said as he entered and sat down with a slouch. But even the class slacker looked unusually tense. “Dude’s creepy, can’t put my finger on why but he definitely doesn’t belong.”

“Oh,” was all the teacher had to say. Suddenly he realized how cold the classroom had become, the uncomfortable feeling that was pressing ever so slightly down on them. “I suppose it makes sense, the ghosts have been quiet lately with the Truce and all. He probably got bored.”

“Sir?” Madison said.

“Shannon,” he said instead, looking over at the frizzy haired girl hunched over her sketchbook furiously at work. “Would you do me a favor and move to the vacant seat in the second row? Just for today.”

“What? Why?” the girl whined even as she gathered up her various arts supplies and got ready to move.

“That’s Mr. Fenton’s seat,” he said taking in a deep breath and closing his eyes in preparation for what he was about to see. Danny would come here, of course he would. This was Lancer’s old classroom and Danny had him for first period English Lit. He and Dash both did.

“Mr. Baxter? What’s going on, is it a ghost?” Malik asked from the back row while Shannon shuffled to her new temporary seat.

“Yes but you don’t need to be scared,” he said softly, evenly. “He won’t hurt you.” The bell rang but Dash didn’t start the lesson. Instead, he waited. Danny had never been on time to class the entire time Dash had known him, of course death wouldn’t change that.

“Sorry, I’m late Mr. Lancer,” Dash gripped his desk so he didn’t jump when Danny Fenton simply appeared in front of his desk instead of walking through the door like any other student. “My folks couldn’t drive me, they’re still working on their stupid ghost portal.” A quick glance over at this class showed varying levels of fear, shock and curiosity but they were Amity kids through and through. The cold, powerful energy radiating off Fenton told them it was best to play along with whatever the ghost wanted.

“Perfectly alright Mr. Fenton,” Dash said softly, searching the 14 year old’s perpetually young face. He hadn’t changed a bit since Dash last saw him their second week of freshman year. It seemed unreal seeing how the years had taken their toll on Casper’s favorite son, Dash Baxter. God had they really been that young once? “Take a seat and we’ll get started.”

Danny shrugged and walked over to the seat Shannon had just vacated. He sat just the same, one leg stretched out and the other propped up against the leg of the desk. As soon as he took off the backpack and put it around the chair, it disappeared. He didn’t say anything else, just sat as stared at Dash with piercing blue eyes like he could see right through him.

“We had been talking about the lead up to the Civil War but let’s table that for today,” Dash said, proud his voice only wavered a little. He knew other people had seen Fenton around town. Lina saw him standing outside the Nasty Burger maybe five or so years ago. Dale, who used to live near Fenton Works swore he sometimes saw someone moving through the windows of the long abandoned house. He’d always secretly dreaded the thought of seeing Danny Fenton again, afraid he’d finally get was coming to him.

“Instead, we’re going to talk about local history,” he continued, not daring to take his eyes off the undead teen. Every other living student was tense, afraid. He wished he could assure them that the ghost wouldn’t lay a hand on them. In the event Fenton decided to ditch the hero schtick, it would be Dash and Dash alone he’d come after. “Amity Park has long had rumors of being haunted dating all the way back to the 1600s. It wasn’t until the last century that scientists determined that Amity Park is located on top of a thin spot between our world and the ghost realm. Natural portals form here all the time allowing spirits to pass through.”

No one spoke and barely anyone breathed except for Danny would wasn’t breathing at all. He just sat and stared at Dash with steady, unblinking eyes.

“Jack and Maddie Fenton were the scientists who discovered the weak point in reality in Amity. They devoted their entire life to the study of ghosts and made remarkable advancements in our knowledge of ectobiology and culture, the first being,” he paused as Danny cocked his head in confusion, squinting his eyes suspiciously at Dash. “The first being their manmade portal to the ghost zone. The portal remained active for almost two decades for research purposes but was shut down following their deaths.”

“You’re not Mr. Lancer,” Danny said suddenly, his eyes shifting from baby blue to an ectoplasmic green. Marty, who was sitting to the left of Danny, swallowed a squeak of fear and squeezed his eyes shut.

“No,” Dash sighed, “Lancer died almost thirty years ago now. Best teacher I ever had, he gave me his blessing when he passed on the job to me.”

“I,” the ghost ran his hand through his hair which was starting to lose its color. Seeing Fenton looking so scared and confused made him ache. It reminded him of old times. Dash had spent most of his life making sure he helped hurt kids if only to make up for the one he’d never been able to make it up to. “I don’t understand.”

“It’s okay, Danny,” he soothed. “I know it’s a lot to take in.”

“The portal, it wasn’t working at first,” Danny justified, his aura glowing a little more. “Sam and Tuck, they were curious. They wanted to look but I told them it wasn’t allowed, Sam, Sam she dared me to go in. I put on the hazmat suit and went inside and found the on button inside. I accidentally hit it and-” he paused midsentence and looked down at his hands. They weren’t pale flesh anymore but covered in white gloves. The black was completely bleached from his hair. A few of the students gasped as they saw the strange would be student melt into Phantom, the ghostly hero who’d been protecting their town since their parents were young. “I died.”

So much time had gone by. People were born and people were buried and the truth became distorted until it was just a legend passed jokingly around cafeteria lunch tables. Amity’s youth had forgotten their town’s history until it was sitting in a desk, trying once more to be one of them.

“You did,” Dash said sadly. He remembered hearing the news of Fenton's death. An assembly had been called the morning after the accident. Lancer had cried at the podium, Manson and Foley hadn’t returned to school for a week and had never been the same again. Dash hadn’t known what to think at the time, only that the kid he’d beat up for the crime of being different would never show up to school again. Or so he’d thought. “It was a tragedy, you were mourned by a lot of people.”

“I know you, don’t I?” Danny said quietly before he sat up straighter. “Dash?”

“In the flesh,” Dash grinned shakily.

“But you’re so old,” Danny said, once more distressed. “Your hair is grey and there’s wrinkles on your face and-and you’re a teacher now?” The last line was said with incredulity, his eyes flaring again. “You used to push me down the stone steps of the school and shove me into my locker and call me names.”

“Yeah, I did,” he sighed, feeling every one of his years. He was pushing 70 but he didn’t think he’d ever stop feeling like a stupid 14 year old who took out his frustrations on the ones who didn’t deserve it. “But you were the last; I never touched another kid again. I’m married now, four kids. I’m vice principal now, teach History and coach the school’s football team. It’s,” his voice caught again, still unable to process how young and stupid Fenton looked sitting there like no time had passed at all. It made Dash feel like all his accomplishments and attempts to be better would never amount to anything so long as his last victim roamed the earth unable to find peace. “It doesn’t fix what I did back then but I make damn sure that there won’t be any bullying at Casper so long as I’m here.”

“Huh,” Danny said, slouching once more in his seat but it looked less like his earlier teenage laziness and more weary. He and Dash were the same age after all, just because only one of them got old doesn’t mean time didn’t still affect them. “You did change, a lot of things did.” Danny looked down at the desk, “how long has it been?”

“Almost 50 years,” Dash sighed. “My wife wants me to retire but I guess I always find more things to do.” He paused then decided it was now or never. “I’m sorry Danny, for hurting you back then. I wish I'd gotten to know you better.”

For just a moment, Danny was perfectly clear. Even half floating out of his chair and looking like the local celebrity, his eyes were so painfully human. A boy killed before he ever got a chance to get started. Who’s will to protect was so strong it lasted half a century. It haunted him late at night to think of the glory and power of Phantom overshadowing just how incredible Danny Fenton had been. Not that anyone had seen it at the time. Soon there wouldn’t be anyone left to remember that quiet, kind teenager and then Danny Fenton really would be dead. Kill him just as thoroughly as that portal had.

The moment was broken by a breath of cold leaking out of the ghost’s lips and, just like that, his highschool classmate was gone and Phantom was left in his stead. He looked curiously around the classroom as if he didn’t know how he’d gotten there.

“There’s a ghost, stay here and don’t leave unless the fighting gets too close. I’ll get it though, don’t worry. No kids are dying today.” Maybe it was Dash’s imagination but he thought he saw Phantom’s eyes linger on him for an extra moment, trying to place where he knew the teacher from. Dash just smiled.

“Our lives are in your hands. Good luck, Phantom,” the ghost teen saluted before fading away entirely. Dash let out the breath he didn’t know he’d been holding, suddenly exhausted but also lighter at the same time. It wasn’t every day you got to look your mistakes in the face and apologize. “Shannon, you can move back now.”

“No, I’m okay here,” Shannon said as she flipped to a new page in her sketchbook and looked intently at the spot where Fenton had once sat. “It’s like you said, that’s Danny’s seat.”

“I had no idea, Phantom’s been around for like, ever,” Freddie mumbled, pushing up his glasses. “But he used to be just like us.” And still was, Dash thought sadly. Danny would never grow old, never go to space like he’d always dreamed or marry Manson like he’d probably intended to. He was stuck, in more ways than one for who knows how long.

“Yes, that’s why it’s important to know your history. The Civil War and my other lessons are important but we can’t forget these smaller, more intimate histories. If we lose these lessons to time then we risk repeating the same mistakes over again.” He looked his students in the eyes, holding their attention.

“So we’ll continue today with the local history. Before he was ghost butt kicking superhero, Phantom was Danny Fenton, son of the local ghost hunters and a bit of an outcast in town. The Daniel Fenton Foundation was founded about a year after his death and was-”

[chubbyreaderchan]

How it Should Have Been | Sesshomaru x Reader

tw: chlldbirth, female reader, anti-sessrin, pregnancy complications, OG Sesshomaru, human reader from modern times so everyone can be included

-- The Reveal --

She was acting strange. 

Something was off with his human mate.

They were tired a lot more often than usual. 

Then when they had dinner with Rin in Kaede’s hut she ran from the room and was ill. It did not add up for the demon lord. Not until Kaede asked. 

“Dog demon.” the crone’s voice came out. “How far along is she?” 

His golden eyes widened and he instantly regretted not noticing from the beginning. He stood up from the social meal, young Rin chattering excitedly over the prospect of a baby had been muffled as he went to find her. It wasn’t difficult combined with knowing her scent better than his own and the scent of sick. He found her knelt over, and he joined her on the ground despite the smell. Pulling back any clothing or hair that may get in the way. 

“How long have you known you were with child, (Y/n)?” 

She looked up at him, a bit of shyness in her face but then she knew that look. To the average person it would be the usual cold stare. The indifferent demeanor he always held. But their connection was different. 

She knew him. 

“I only realised a couple weeks ago... if I had to guess... maybe since the last full moon?” His golden eyes pierced her soul. 

They always did in the most liberating and exciting way. 

His slender fingers reached forward and he gently wiped her face. For one moment, Sesshomaru held an expression of care in his stony features. 

In that moment he was truly beautiful. 

-- Things Get Complicated -- 

Her body was beautiful in Sesshomaru’s mind.

Everytime they were alone his hands were on the growing bump, on her body in every way possible. It was a source of pride for the dog demon. However, one evening while she was taking care of the laundry she collapsed. He only found her because she took an unusual amount of time hanging her kimonos. 

Her body sprawled out in the dirt, face paled from the normal lively color. Instantly, she was in his arms and off to Kaede’s hut. 

"Old crone.” Sesshomaru’s voice was dark and demanding. “She collapsed.” If one didn’t know him he may seem unconcerned but there was a light waver to his voice. He was terrified. 

But if given the choice... he’d save her first.

Kagome was also in the hut, thankfully. 

“Lay her down!” Kagome insisted, not caring one bit about yelling at the demon lord. 

He didn’t either. She was more important than a tone of voice at this moment. 

Sesshomaru laid her down, letting her head rest against his lap. 

“Her heart beat is low” Kagome noted. The young priestess placed a cool rag on her forehead and she slowly came through.

“Kagome?” she was confused. Where was she? How did--? 

Oh! She remembered being light headed and then blank. 

Sesshomaru made a sigh of relief. 

“Your blood pressure is the issue,” Kagome explained. “She needs to rest. Stay off her feet. Probably until the baby is here, at least. Just to be safe. Only walking around a bit to help blood flow.” 

"Aye, she needs rest,"

His eyes turned instantly serious. "I'll be fine--"

"(Y/n)..." His tone was dark. Dangerous. A tone he'd never use on her. Ever.

This was serious.

He was scared of losing her.

In a moment he lifted her into his back to bring her home.

This fear caused Sesshomaru to become more protective.

He cooked. He cleaned. He did things he would never had done before.

Laundry. Hair brushing. Whatever was needed he did. He didn't even trust someone to do it for him. How could they do it correctly?

-- Birth --

It all happened so quickly.

Pain.

All she felt was pain.

Her water definitely broke.

It was time but something felt off.

It was her first child. How would she know? Instinct? Maybe. He was instantly at her side as she screamed in pain.

She survived worse than this, hadn't she?

The tears on her face made Sesshomaru angry. So very angry. Or was he scared? It was hard to tell the difference in that moment.

Towels. Blood.

Screaming.

All for the sake of a tiny silver haired baby to be placed in her waiting arms.

There was something wrong even still. She was paling again.

So much blood.

She could die.

Kagome rushed him out force that no one knew she had as she, Kaede and Sango worked to care for her and baby.

Luck.

That's all it was.

Luck that the bleeding stopped. That they were able to keep baby warm.

Then he was brought back in, seeing his baby on the breast of his woman was like seeing heaven.

The dog lord knelt down to her, touching her face then the baby's head. "It's a boy" she said in a horses voice.

"My son." He responded gently.

-- Toddling --

"Naoki!"

Tree of truth.

Named with the three that connected them all in mind.

She was pregnant again, despite Sesshomaru's hesitancy but she wanted one more.

Just one more.

He'd give her the world if she asked him.

The small silver haired boy was bothering his father whom didn't seem to interested in the boy who decided the single most scariest demon would be a great thing to climb on.

Sesshomaru looked up at his swollen wife. This pregnancy had no scares this time.

"Your papa isn't a tree,"

"Papa!" He still wasn't fully speaking but small babbling was expected. It was especially amusing since Sesshomaru would speak to him as if he knew exactly what was being said.

As if he respected the hanyou as an equal.

Perhaps he did.

The baby went to move towards his mother however he was on his father's shoulder and the movement started him towards the dirt. With grace, Sesshomaru grabbed the boy as if it were nothing before passing the son on to his mate.

"Ada!" Baby Naoki shouted in a high pitch squeak.

"I don't think that was fun. You would have ended up crying." He spoke, as always as if he knew exactly what the baby said.

Sesshomaru seemed to have a natural intuition with his children. It often left his mate jealous but the jealousy was squashed out by a pride of having someone care so much for them.

The demon lord had truly grown since she first met him all those years ago under that great tree.

It seemed he learned that caring wasn't weakness but strength.

That was why he didn't travel as often, though he still desired power, his family became his main priority.

That's how it should be.