#i deeply apologize for any inconvenience this might cause

[shiiko529]

whoopsie~

(these guys are really dumb)

[kurishiri]

02 . . . happy birthday, alfons! ˗ˏˋ🪞´ˎ˗

— this translation may not be 100% accurate or may contain creative liberties for characterization or narrative flow purposes. if you enjoy, please consider reblogging, but don’t repost or claim these as your own!

— cw: none; alfons is actually pretty soft in this chapter!

In my own way, I thought that it was a plan for a wonderful birthday.

However, such plans would soon be riddled with trouble...

Kate: Wh—!? They’re closed...?

When we arrived at the restaurant I had reserved for lunch, there was a sign that said ‘CLOSE.’

Alfons: ‘The restaurant’s owner contracted a sudden illness,’ so they say here, I see. Well, such cases do arise once in a while.

A: How about we visit another restaurant then? Is there anything in particular you’re craving now?

Kate: In that case, we should eat what you want. You’re the birthday boy, after all!

Alfons: Well then... how does the restaurant over there sound?

The restaurant we entered was empty, and the food was immediately brought out after we put in our orders, but...

(...It doesn’t taste that good.)

(No, rather, I would say the flavor is unsavory...)

Alfons: Pfft... hehe... ahha!

A: Just from your expression... I can read your thoughts like a book right now.

A: Hapless though it may be, it would appear this restaurant’s cuisine doesn’t suit your palate?

Kate: ...Do you like this, Alfons?

Alfons: Positively god-awful, I’d say.

Kate: I feel like I should have seen this coming with how there’s not a single person here, even during the lunch hour.

Alfons: The food is thoroughly cooked, and there doesn’t appear to be any suspicious ingredients in it either, and yet...

A: I can’t help but wonder where this profoundly mysterious flavor has snuck in.

While saying this, Alfons slipped off his gloves, and touched the nape of my neck.

Alfons: The food before your eyes is a delicious cuisine from a renowned restaurant.

(Ah... he used his ability on me.)

Albeit nervously, I once again brought the food to my lips.

Kate: Oh, it is delicious...! Thank you so much, Alfons.

Alfons: It was a little more than child’s play to me, so think not much of it. Come now, let’s eat the rest.

Kate: What about you, though, Alfons? I mean, the food’s flavor...

Alfons: The food at the castle is a plethora of things you’d find in five-star restaurants, so I must admit I’m rather taken by this unique change of pace.

Kate: Is that so...

(This birthday celebration isn’t off to a great start, it seems.)

(But, there is still a whole day ahead of us! The next thing will surely be a blast!)

After lunch, we visited an auction venue.

Alfons: Is there an item you wish to bid for, perchance?

Kate: Actually, the auction isn’t being held today, so there’s a magic show in its place.

Alfons: I see... I’m most eager to see it. An actual successful magic show, unlike the ones we are subjected to see back at the castle.

Kate: Hehe, yeah!

K: ...Ah, the host has come up. It looks like it’s going to start soon.

Host: Uhm, to all gathered here today, we deeply apologize for the inconvenience caused with this sudden notice...

Host: ...but the magician we have invited has caught a sudden illness, and as such, we will be holding a special art auction today.

Kate: Ehh...

Alfons: No matter where we go, it seems the aforementioned ‘sudden illness’ follows suit.

Kate: Yes, I wonder if the cold has been going around recently...

(What should we do? Let’s see, what are places Alfons might enjoy... umm...)

Alfons: ...Since we are here already, how about we go and check out some of the art pieces?

Kate: I don’t mind that, but...

K: I’m sure you’re long used to seeing pieces like this, so would it not be boring?

Since Lord Elbert collects beautiful things,

I’m sure Alfons, too, has laid his eyes on many beautiful things as well, from being by his side.

(So to just be looking at these art pieces the auction has now, it probably wouldn’t be very interesting...)

Alfons: Would it not be a most thrilling experience to watch the audience compete with each other with bloodshot eyes from the outside?

A: And even if that does become boring, I have you to play with.

Kate: ...Alright then. Let’s look at the art pieces.

(Alfons is the one who should be getting his birthday celebrated, and yet it seems he’s always extending his consideration to me today.)

Finally, the sun started to set, inviting the night to come.

(To think everything we’ve done has failed... oh, but there are still two things left to celebrate.)

(Even if it’s just these two things, I definitely can’t let them fail...!)

After we returned to the castle and ate dinner, we went to Alfons’ room.

Kate: Alfons, here is the next present!

I gave the box I prepared to Alfons.

Alfons: Is it alright to open it?

Kate: Go ahead! It is food, so just put it on the table before opening it, so it doesn’t drop.

Though a bit corny, inside was a birthday cake.

(It’s a birthday cake with a cat drawn on it... I hope he’s happy.)

I watched him as Alfons took the cake out from the box.

Alfons: This...!

Kate: How is it?

Alfons: ...Kate. May I ask exactly when we got married?

Kate: Eh...?

Alfons showed the cake my way.

There, written on the cake, was neither a cat nor a happy birthday message, but rather...

Kate: ‘Congratulations on your 50 year wedding anniversary’...!?

The cake had words of congratulations to a wedding, with an illustration of an elderly couple I didn’t recognize drawn on it.

Alfons: It would seem the bakery has mixed our cake up with some elderly couple’s cake?

Kate: No way... I’ll need to contact the shop right away...!

Alfons: It would come as a surprise if the shop was still open at this hour though, I would imagine?

A: However, I doubt the cake will be good by the time morning rolls around, so let’s just eat what we have here.

—— Time skip ——

Alfons: I do find it quite unfortunate that I couldn’t eat that treasured cake you had chosen for me...

A: ...but this cake here tasted delicious, too.

Kate: Right...

Alfons: So, Kate? Care to bring out the final present?

Kate: About... that... the cake is the final present. I’m really sorry that everything has been a mess up to the end...

Alfons: Oh, don’t deceive me now. The cake wasn’t supposed to be the last present, yes?

Kate: It’s just that today nothing has been going as planned... so I’m scared that something about the last thing would also go wrong...

Alfons: ...Why, you can blame every happening today on mischance.

A: Not a single thing that happened was your fault.

A: Besides, so what if everything didn’t go as you hoped? It’s the sentiment of wanting to celebrate that matters, no?

Kate: That’s true, but still... I wanted you to have a fun birthday, Alfons.

K: A birthday so fun, it will remain in your memory forever. That kind of birthday.

If it was a birthday fun enough to carve a place in Alfons’ memory, then surely, it would do the same for me.

I wanted us to carve that memory into each other, so that we would never forget this day for eternity.

(But, with all these blunders on his birthday, how could it ever remain in his memory...)

Alfons: A birthday that will remain in my memory... you said?

A: ...If that’s the case, it would be remiss of me not to think today has been going swimmingly as you hoped.

Kate: Eh...?

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full masterlist 🪞🍰 ╱ ko-fi ☕ (30% of proceeds will go to doctors without borders for donations $17↑)

[ariaste]

hheeyy I am probably gonna buy your pirate book regardless, because it does sound wonderful, but just so I know what I'm getting my little ace brain into: the gizmodo article you linked described Brother Julian as having "a frankly inconvenient vow of celibacy" and i had terrible flashbacks of the way the dragon age 2 fandom talked about Sebastian so like. Does Julian *also* think his vow is inconvenient, or am I going to have to go in accepting that funny queer pirates who resolve things with polyamory is worth wincing through a few conversations where his suitors just Cannot Believe someone so hot doesn't want to fuck oh my we must save him from himself or. whatever the fuck. Again, i loved A Touch Of Gold And Iron so I do trust you, but I've had authors i trust suddenly and unthinkingly have their characters spout aphobic talking points before, so i just want a warning, i guess. Thank you and I promise this isn't intended as a judgement of any kind, just me making sure I'm taking care of myself

No worries! I have not seen any of the Dragon Age 2 discourse and I don't know who Sebastian is, but I think I can sort of glean from context what you mean.

The answer about Julian is a little spoilery for mostly worldbuilding and a bit of his character arc, but not plot. I'm gonna try to put it under a cut, but tumblr is broken sometimes, so if the cut does not work, I apologize to the general public.

Julian is a monk of the Vintish church, which is sort of "what if the Catholic church but make it The Enlightenment" -- their religion teaches that the pursuit of knowledge and Understanding is deeply holy and that the Emperor of Heaven filled the world with mysteries specifically because he wanted humanity to figure out his little puzzles. Monks of this church take vows not to give up all "sinful" things, but to give up the one thing that occupies their mind above all else and causes them to be distracted from the pursuit of knowledge. For some people that might be alcohol, or gambling, or an addiction, or wearing pretty clothes, or anger/resentment, or whatever. For Julian, that thing was sex. He is the most allosexual man who has ever lived. He LOVED sex. It was a source of pure joy and delight and fulfillment for him -- he's one of those people who can find something wonderful and attractive in pretty much everyone he meets.

There were some Urgent Circumstances fifteen years ago in his past where taking that vow was preferable to the alternative that would have happened if he hadn't taken it, so in that sense it was a tool that served a purpose -- it was at one point a deeply convenient way of saving his own ass. I also think it was an important lesson for Young Julian to realize that sometimes you have to make sacrifices and that sacrifices HURT.

However, whether he would say in hindsight now that it was inconvenient... I think he has mixed feelings. He's very good at nuance, Julian is, and so he recognizes that all his experiences have made him into the person who he is and that he has Learned and Grown and Gained Knowledge Of Himself, which he does sincerely believe is a holy and righteous thing -- he deeply values the journey that he has been on. But at the same time.... at his heart he's just a fun guy and secretly an absolute gremlin in his own ways, you know? And tools that were once useful and relevant do not always remain so. Hope that helps!! I am on the ace/demi spectrum myself, so I've got some irritating experiences of the ways that people write about ace characters and try to "fix" them -- this is definitely not that situation.

Also, just cause you mentioned you're ace -- FYI there isn't any on-page sex in the book, just lots of dumb sex jokes and flirting. :)

[queenstc]

Fire Hans……

FROZEN: THE ENCHANTED WARRIOR'Z [Helsa]

Sneak peek:

Hans giving a toast at his coronation party

Hans: (raising a glass of champagne)

 To my brother, the true king and hero!

As he brings the glass to his lips, the champagne mysteriously starts to melt the glass

Hans: (panicked) 

Wh-what's happening?! Why is my champagne melting?!

The audience gasps as everything Hans touches suddenly bursts into flames

Hans: (ashen-faced)

 ….oops 

Everything goes into slow motion. We hear the sound of Hans heart beating as the Royal advisers swiftly take him away and explain the legend to him

FADE OUT:

CUT TO:

INT. HANS ROYAL CHAMBERS - NIGHT (THE BLOOD MOON)

Hans paces anxiously in his royal chambers, surrounded by his loyal guards. His hands are in protective gloves, trying to contain his unruly fire powers.

HANS: (dramatically)

Oh, woe is me! I believe one of you have dislocated my shoulder with your brute force. How dare you!

His loyal servants rush to apologize, feeling guilty for their part in the chaos.

SERVANT 1: (sincerely)

Oh, Your Highness, we deeply apologize for any inconvenience caused. We were just trying to ensure your safety.

Hans waves them off, still grumbling under his breath, but his attention quickly shifts as his royal advisers enter the room, carrying a large book titled "The Past, Present and Future."

ROYAL ADVISER 1:(excited)

Your Highness, we've found the ancient legend of the Fire King. It might provide some insight into your newfound powers.

Hans raises an eyebrow, intrigued yet skeptical.

HANS: (teasingly)

Well, well, let's hear what this ancient legend has to say. Prepare for my stunning commentary.

The royal advisers clear their throats and begin reading from the book.

ROYAL ADVISER 2: (dramatically)

Chapter 1: The Legend of the Fire King. It is said that on the blood moon of December, the one who is crowned king shall be blessed with the power to control fire and lava.

Hans stifles a laugh, unable to contain his amusement.

HANS: (whispering)

Ah, so my coronation was perfectly timed with the blood moon. Just my luck!

ROYAL ADVISER 1: (continuing)

Under the rule of the Fire King, Enchanta will grow ever powerful and advance to new heights.

Hans interrupts, unable to resist the opportunity for witty sarcasm.

HANS: (raising an eyebrow)

Ah, of course, the all-powerful Fire King, here to bring forth the era of lava-infused advancements. I can see the future now; lava-powered iPhones and fire-spitting dishwashers!

Everyone in the room stifles laughter, trying to maintain their composure.

ROYAL ADVISER 2: (resuming composure)

Your Highness, with this power, you can reshape the kingdom and bring prosperity like none other.

Hans pauses for a moment, his expression more serious.

Hans: (in disbelief)

 You mean I'm stuck with these powers forever?!

Adviser 1: (nodding solemnly)

 Yes, but you can't just ignore them. You must go to the Enchanted Forest and find the fifth spirit.

Hans: (looking at the book)

 Wait a minute...that's Elsa!

Adviser 2: 

Yes, we know it may seem difficult, but you have no choice.

Hans: (sarcastically) 

Oh sure, because she'll be so thrilled to see me after what I've done to her.

Adviser 1: (flipping through the book) 

It says here that you two will become unlikely allies in chapter two.

Hans: (skeptical)

 I highly doubt that.

Hans takes the book and flips through a few more pages before sighing

Hans: (resigned) 

Get my horse ready. I'll leave at dawn.

https://www.wattpad.com/story/346026593-frozen-the-enchanted-warrior%27z-helsa

[fatrocka64]

Dear Neffertity, I am deeply sorry for saying nasty comments about you and MAW Events being canceled and even for you not attending certain events in the Furry Community including Fur Out West, I just felt so bad for you when you couldn't travel anywhere outside of the United States and even anywhere near Canada because I think that I sabotaged and ruined your interest in traveling all the way from Nevada in order to visit any Furry Convention outside of your hometown. Also, Stellar had blocked me just because I tried to apologize for everything that had put you through so much anxiety before going anywhere. Another thing is that Absurd Abyss and Neppy_theblusetplanet even lied about me posting something that was considered kinky which is just a statement after I made that comment while I was upset.

The first mistake that I did was I accidentally had a crush on you during the Holiday Season of 2022 because I didn't know you had a significant other which I didn't even notice beforehand. I apologize for the inconvenience this may have caused. and then I said something about me wanting to donate some money but would rather rot in a vampire coffin which is what I said. I NEVER SAID anything about sleeping with you while you were pregnant. AT ALL. I apologized to you beforehand last summer when you lost GOH at Fur Out West which I think was my fault that you couldn't attend that particular event. I also wanted to come clean about this that I kept to myself since 2023. I had also theorized that you were a communist spy secretly engaged in contact with the Russian Government and Vladimir Putin in order to get information about Myself, Hamilton City and the Canadian Region. Now I am deeply sorry for saying something I shouldn't say. But I didn't say it directly against you but only to the owners of MAW Events. Your sister and your friends Had made up a lie.

All I said was: I wish I could donate Money to Neffertity but I would rather rot in a vampire coffin. Keep in mind I have Autism and I was reacting to death and defeat clips of Scream killers from oldest to latest film installment.

That's why I was mad.. I am afraid of having Furnal Equinox taken away from me and I possibly might not attend anymore Furry Conventions for a whole year if people keep spreading rumors and lies about me. However I hope you can make it to Anthro New Mexico Next Year. I wish you luck out there.. I probably won't be allowed to access Furnal Equinox or any furry fandom based event next year. Or possibly forever.

I will think about it but I highly doubt that I will be allowed to go back. And there will be a possibility That I might be taken away to a mental institution

Thank you for understanding and farewell..

I wish you good luck and hope that you are attending future events - Fatrocka64

[firelord-frowny]

anyway, i gotta give huge major bigass props to "ExpressCare Urgent care."

Obligatory disclaimer that I know literally nothing about place as a company/corporation/whatever outside of the personal experience i've had with them over the last two days. so i can't speak to their overall business practices in any positive or negative way.

Additional obligatory disclaimer that i THINK my experience was specifically associated with the sect of this company that operates in Maryland specifically. so if you live somewhere else, i can't vouch for what you might expect from them.

but anyway the experience i had was fantastic tbh. even when there was a hiccup on their end, it was promptly explained and dealt with. The only other hiccup was the insurance company's fault. (the first hiccup was ALSO kinda the insurance company's fault, but expresscare was able to explain the issue and tell me what i needed to do instead.)

I first did a ~virtual visit~ with them. Signed up for a time slot at 7:20.

Ya know what time I wound up having the appointment at? 7:22.

And this was AFTER a very nice intake lady called me at 7:14 to confirm all the intake info i'd filled out beforehand.

By 7:30, I had a prescription for antibiotics, yest infection meds just incase the antibiotics caused one, and a nasal mist. By like 8ish, my meds were available for pickup at my chosen pharmacy. (didn't actually get them till TWO IN THE FUCKING MORNING THOUGH because my brother said he'd pick them up for me on his way home 'in like an hour' and decided to take 6 of them instead).

The next day, the sore throat pain was still bad that i couldn't eat/drink very much, and surely contributed to the fact that i would up having to call out sick for work bc i threw up a WHOLE LOT in the parking lot.

so i decided to do another virtual urgent care appointment to ask if i could be given something additional to ease the pain so i can eat/drink.

WELL, for some reason the insurance companies don't allow telehealth services to treat the same patient for the same ailment unless a minimum of 7 days has transpired between appointments. And i didn't find that out until literally the split second before the phone lady was about to connect me to the video call. even though i had already submitted my reason for the appointment like 15 minutes prior, and even though they obviously already had on file that i had an appointment for the same reason yesterday. the lady was very sweet about it, though, and apologized for the inconvenience, and let me know that i would have to redo the intake forms under the ~in person visit~ parameter.

So i did! frustrating, but only took like 5 extra minutes.

scheduled the in-person appointment for 7:11. (which is extra funny bc i told my parents "i have an urgent care appointment at "7-11" and they were deeply concerned at the prospect of me meeting an alleged health care professional for treatment at a 7-11 convenience store lmaoooo. i'm like noooo, not the store! the time! and they're like ohhhhhh.)

arrived at the center at like 7:15ish i guess? (which is ACTUALLY the time that i technically signed up for? i clicked the box that said 7:15 but in all the confirmation stuff they sent me, it said 7:11.)

i go and check in at the desk and the ladies were SUUUUPER SWEET and helpful and gave me all the info i needed and asked me all the questions they needed to ask.

despite the website having warned about (paraphrased) "long wait times and high volume due to surge of omicron covid patients and scheduled appointments may need to be canceled," the place only had 2 other people in there! and the desk ladies told me they were "a little slow today" and im like??? where??? how fast does stuff usually go??? omg???

so sat and waited for, i think, about 15ish minutes before being called in.

lady took my vitals and tested for covid, strip, and flu. all negative.

then i waited for a good bit, maybe like 30ish minutes? i assume mostly because that's how long it took to complete the tests.

then the nurse practitioner finally came in, asked me questions, looked in mah mouf and stuff, was sweetly concerned about how dehydrated i obviously was, and then offered to prescribe me the prednisone.

so im like! hell yeah!

and she goes, "okay, would you like to have the first shot now, and then pick up the rest at the pharmacy tomorrow?"

and im like

bee yotch, did you just say SHOT??? (i didnt really call her a bee yotch)

and she's like "mhm!"

and im like! uhhhhhhh do you happen to have that in pill form??? i am a big baby and i cant do shots.

and she was like no problem, sure!

minute later, the assistant lady brings the meds and some water.

so i take them!

they are fucking disGUSTing!!!!! the slight bit of time they were on my tongue before i swallowed was BRUTAL for my wimp lil dumb dumb tastebuds. it was only marginally preferable to a shot omg.

nurse practitioner returns with my discharge papers and tells me im good to go!

just to cover all my bases, i asked if i needed to stop at the desk for anything before i go, and she said nope! get outta here! (she didn't say get outta here.)

and then i went home!

one other slight snafu was that the desk ladies either forgot, or misunderstood that i wanted them to switch my preferred pharmacy to a different location.

but i think that won't be an issue, because i was able to change the locations via the pharmacy's website. won't know for sure if the ~system~ actually accepted it until tomorrow, i guess! (tomorrow is today because it is 6:46 am lolol).

so yeah. everyone involved did excellent work and facilitated a process that was as stress free as possible for me during such a frustrating and uncomfortable time.

10/10, would definitely recommend.

[jedikat71]

Been a weird couple of days...

I know a lot of you get links to my fanfiction on here (and I deeply appreciate your continued interest), so I thought you might like to know about a decision I just made and the reason behind it. For the past two days I've gotten guest comments on one of my AO3 works that are... bizarre, to say the least. They may have been innocuous for all I know - perhaps a strange attempt at flirting or a cheeky request to update the work. The thing is, they addressed me by my RL name, and quoted the Doctor Strange movie (the "come to bargain" scene) and nothing more - no comments or questions about the fic whatsoever. The only way I figure that this person knew my RL name is that they follow or know me from Twitter or Facebook (those accounts are under my name, and I've posted links to my fanfics there). Again, this could be harmless for all I know, but with the world and the internet the way it is today, and with the use of my RL name and the weird vagueness of these comments, I can't help but feel uneasy as to what this person's motives may be. And since the commenter is a guest, I'm unable to block them. So I made the difficult decision to restrict all comments on my AO3 works to registered users only. Hopefully this will bring these bizarre comments to an end, and this person will find something better to do. Some of you might think I'm overreacting, but I've had a previous bad experience with another fanfiction writer, and the internet has felt more and more unsafe to me lately. I do have a fear that restricting my comments might only anger this person and provoke them into harassing me elsewhere, but perhaps "elsewhere" will be a place I can easily block them. However it's done, I hope they'll get the message to leave me alone. I'm really sorry for the inconvenience this might cause anyone. I enjoy interacting with my readers as much as I do writing my stories, and I'm sorry that I feel compelled to take a step which means I'll interact with less of you. I hope this change won't be a permanent one, but I need to do what's best for my sense of safety and mental health. And... to make this week even weirder, my car's windshield got smashed when the neighboring building's already damaged fence got blown over by a gust of wind. With this added stress, it might be a while longer until any of my AO3 WIPs get an update. Again, I offer my apologies, and my deepest thanks for your understanding. Take care!

[harunayuuka2060]

MC: Young master, I might be gone for a little while. I deeply apologize for the inconvenience.

Diavolo: It's alright. You mentioned there's a problem in your country.

MC: It is an internal issue so I'm sure there's still a way to fix it and it won't take long.

Diavolo: I see. By the way, MC. We're aware that you are an aristocrat, but what kind of position do you hold?

MC: ...

Diavolo: ...

MC: I refrain myself from saying it, young master.

Diavolo: Why?

MC: You might decide not to pay me anymore and I can't have that.

Diavolo: Oh... Okay.

----------------------------------------------

Lucifer: You want to know what is MC in the world of aristocrats?

Diavolo: Yes. I'm guessing that they're might be an earl, a viscount, or a duke.

Lucifer: So in short, you want to spy on them?

Diavolo: Yes. Barbatos and I are already making preparations. Do you want to go with us?

Lucifer: You can just ask Barbatos.

Diavolo: I want to see it for myself. And I stopped Barbatos from giving any hints.

Lucifer: ...

Lucifer: *sigh* Fine.

----------------------------------------------

*Lucifer, Diavolo, and Barbatos decided to stroll around MC's country before they go straight to what they came for*

Diavolo: This is fantastic! I don't see anyone having a hard time!

Barbatos: Indeed. All of the people here are living in prosperity and harmony.

Lucifer: It looks like a perfect place to live in.

Diavolo: I'm done looking around. Shall we go straight to their house?

Barbatos: Young master, if we go there right now, you will probably guess their position in the high society.

Diavolo: Are they a duke? A viscount?

Barbatos: *points at the imperial palace*

Diavolo: ...

Diavolo: Are they one of the officials?

Barbatos: You'll see, young master.

----------------------------------------------

*The three have already sneaked undetected in the imperial palace*

Lucifer: Where are we?

Barbatos: In the courtroom, someone is in trial today.

Diavolo: Oh. You mean that woman at the center?

Count: Your Imperial Highness! We have evidence here that this woman is planning for a treason and wants to overthrow the current emperor!

The young man sitting on the throne: Is that true?

Count: Yes, Your Imperial Highness! Here are the documents to prove her guilt!

The woman: *who is a baroness* Your Imperial Highness! I will never do any of those accusations! *cries pleadingly* I'm already living a lavish life together with my children and that is thanks to Your Imperial Highness!

Count: Silence, you wench! *slapping her*

The woman: *cries*

Diavolo: Oh. He's being harsh.

Lucifer: I still don't see MC though.

The young man sitting on the throne: Your Imperial Highness, what am I going to do with this?

The count and the baroness: !!!

Lucifer and Diavolo: *their eyes widened*

MC: *comes out, wearing the emperor's clothes* Didn't you learn after sitting on the throne for quite some time?

MC's brother: What can I say? I'm just an acting emperor.

MC's brother: And for the baroness, the real emperor will cast their verdict. *gives MC a sword*

MC: *approaches the baroness* Count.

Count: Y-Yes, Your Imperial Highness?

MC: What is the punishment for treason?

Count: T-The subject will be beheaded and the family will stop receiving support from the emperor.

MC: That is right. I'm glad you knew what punishment you will receive.

Count: Wh-What do you mean, Your Imperial Highness—

MC: *cuts his head clean with the sword*

The baroness: *trembles in fear*

MC: And you, baroness. This is the second time you got in trouble for refusing a potential marriage.

The baroness: Y-Your Imperial Highness...*tears up* I didn't mean to cause you any trouble... *sobs*

MC: *sigh* I can't believe I went home just for this.

MC's brother: Your Imperial Highness! Can I ask the baroness to be my wife?

The baroness: H-Huh?

MC: Don't force yourself to answer. *helps her to stand up*

MC's brother: *orders someone to assist the baroness and gives her a room in the imperial palace*

*Once MC and their brother are alone*

MC's brother: *runs to hug them* MC~ You're back!

MC: I will be leaving again the next week.

MC's brother: Aww~ Can't you just do that after my birthday party?

MC: No. I won't be staying here for six months.

Lucifer and Diavolo: ...

Barbatos: I hope this doesn't affect on how you treat them as a maid.

[1tarot1with1k1o]

Somewhat important announcement

Hello hello! I haven’t been able to say this earlier, cause I didn’t have stable internet connection. Sorry for this last minute notice.

I have been told that my exam was gonna be held in a different city than the one I thought it was gonna be in, very suddenly. So I had to reorganize the trip in a rush, and leave earlier than I thought I would; since the new location it’s further than the former one.

I’m currently at the hotel, and I will stay here until the 15th…ish. I couldn’t bring my cards with me, so I can’t send out any readings at the moment.

I’d like to apologize to those who are waiting for an exchange; you’ll be the first I’ll reach out to, once I get home. I swear. And sorry for those who have been waiting for an answer for long, as well; I will try my best to do as many readings as possible once I get back!

I just wanted to let you know this, so you don’t think that I’m scamming you or something haha. I’m deeply sorry for the delay, but like I said, I really thought I had a few more days to do readings, before having to come here.

Tomorrow I won’t be very active for the most part, because it’s the day of the exam. However, I might reopen the shufflemancy game, so that I can somewhat makeup for the lack of tarot readings during these days.

Thank you very much for patiently waiting, and sorry again for the inconvenience!! 🧡🧡🧡

[shorkbrian]

Omg okay uh... Nasty stalker Bakugou breaking in to his darling's home only for them to come home early to see their yandere in their room, laying in their bed. Bakugou's surprised but smug, deciding now's a better time than ever to take them away

Titled “Bakugou coming to terms with the fact he’s a nasty, nasty man.”

Prelude - this is trash. I am trash. I’ve been stuck for a bit with requests and getting motivation to write, but I’m trying to work through it and so we have this. ANEEWAYZ Anon, this is an awesome request and made me p hornee, 10/10

Prompt - at the toP

Pairing - Bakugou X Reader

Warnings - NSFW, non con, cunnilingous. No penetration. Bakugou got a HUGE scent kink lol sorry 

Music - no <3

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 Bakugou was disgusted with himself.

Here he was, a good looking male, and he was spending his free time breaking into a woman’s apartment for the hundredth time. Is it even considered “breaking and entering” if he had a key? It was a stolen key, and Bakugou knew he would still be thrown into jail if the object of his affections ever found out just how often he chose to “visit” without permission.

Yet he couldn’t stop himself from coming back.

Turning the (stolen) key in the lock, the blonde pushed the door open, glancing towards the neighboring apartment doors before he stepped inside. It would be no good if your neighbors saw him sneaking in - they might ask you about your “new man,” and you’d get suspicious. 

Bakugou wiped his shoes on the welcome mat, quietly slipping them off and placing them on the bottom shelf of your shoe rack. He knew it was stupid, but he liked to pretend that he was coming home from work, about to slip into bed with you and feel you in his arms as you kissed him hello. Unfortunately, the reality had you still at work, making and serving fancy coffee at the little cafe you worked in, and Bakugou was nothing more than a creep, fantazing about a woman that had done little more than take his order.

Did you even know he existed? Bakugou thought you might; he did come to the cafe every Wednesday morning, sat in the chair that allowed him to see the staff as they worked. It would be hard to miss his presence, considering the scene he had caused on one of his coffee runs. A man had bumped into you as you were placing Bakugou’s coffee on the table, causing you to spill it everywhere (including on Bakugou’s lap, which had fuckin’ hurt, the liquid being hotter than the surface of the sun). Before you could even take a breath to apologize, Bakugou was on his feet, verbally attacking the man that had stumbled into you.

He really ripped into the stranger, not hesitating to use every insult he knew to demean the man for jostling you. Bakugou knew his personality was abrasive and that he had a short temper, but seeing someone touch you so casually and cause you an unnecessary hardship had him angrier than normal. By the time Bakugou was done yelling, the man was beet red, sweating, apologizing profusely to both Bakugou and you for causing any inconvenience. 

The look you had given Bakugou as the man left made his heart squeeze. Your eyes were blazing, fists clenched as you stared the blonde down, mouth set in a way that made your lips jut out in a frown.

“Sir, there was no reason to yell at that poor man. It was an honest mistake that I could’ve easily handled.”

Bakugou was shocked. 

“Yeah, a fucking “mistake” alright. Motherfucker didn’t even think to apologize before I said anything.” “I don’t need a white knight. Sit down and leave it be, or else I’ll have no problem kicking you out.”

You had been so bossy and confident, Bakugou reluctantly sat down, grumbling about his burnt junk while you went to grab napkins to clean up the spill. 

From then on, the blonde watched you like a hawk, enjoying the way you chewed out rude customers or made crude jokes with your coworkers when you thought no one was listening. He was hooked, baited by your personality into learning more about you. However, he knew that you probably wanted nothing to do with him, knew that you would probably laugh in his face if he asked for your number.

So he resorted to this.

As humiliating as it was, as wrong as he knew it to be, Bakugou enjoyed being in your apartment. Everything smelled like you, he was able to figure out your favorite snacks and dishes, got to see what you liked to read. 

The first few times he followed you home from the cafe, he told himself he was doing it for your own safety. You had such a smart mouth, lots of customers had been miffed by the way you called attention to their rudeness. It wouldn’t take much for one of them to follow you home, try to put their hands on you.   When it slowly evolved into the man breaking into your apartment, Bakugou told himself that it was just out of curiosity, even though deep down he was aware of a more sinister reason.

Even when the man went looking for your underwear drawer, he denied the action to himself, refused to think about what it meant or think about it for more than a few seconds. He refused to hold himself accountable for his feelings, nor for his actions. 

He was swimming in a sea of denial, letting his impulses and desires guide him.

 Consequences? That word wasn’t in his vocabulary when it came to his dealings with you.

What could the repercussions be? You were never home when he visited, you never knew he had been there, you never noticed him at work, never even acknowledged his existence. There had been no sign that you were aware of him following you home, following you to the store, following you to the mall. At this point, Bakugou was resigned to the fact that you would probably never notice him.

And if you did, so what? He easily had the means to take you away, keep you from ever revealing his “hobby” to the world (the more the man thought about it, the more the idea appealed).

Consequences be damned, Bakugou Katsuki did what he wanted to.

That’s why he allowed himself to go through your closet, look at your clothes and imagine you wearing them. He looked through your shoes, admiring your choices in fashion. He looked through your bathroom, noting what soaps you used and the skincare that littered the counter, the color of your toothbrush and the perfume that you saved for special occasions.

Bakugou’s favorite thing to do in your apartment was also the most shameful. It had started after a bad day, when he was already frustrated and heated. He had stormed into your apartment, and was too worked up to find the space as calming as it usually was. Bakugou had stomped towards your bedroom, wanted to bury his face in your pillows and breathe in your scent, forget about the stress of life. When he had tripped over the pile of dirty clothes in the doorway, he almost had a fit before realizing that the light blue lace on the top of the pile were your dirty panties.

His brain whispered that it was a good idea, so he acted upon his impulses and snatched them, proceeding to climb onto your bed and jack off.

Now it was a regular occurrence, him rooting through your laundry basket to find your latest pair. You were good about your laundry, so sometimes he had to settle for picking through your underwear drawer, which was notably less satisfying. Bakugou couldn’t figure out why until he thought about it for a second, coming to a riveting conclusion as he pressed your panties close to his face.

He liked the smell of you.

The man didn’t get to think about it further than that, already too worked up to do anything but pull his cock free, press your panties to his face, and fist his cock like it was the last time he’d ever get to touch himself.

Some days he would use your panties to stroke himself, bring himself to orgasm thinking about you and your body and the things he’d like to do to it. Other day’s he’d bunch your panties in his fist and press them against his face while he laid down on your bed, and he’d jerk himself off while taking in your scent.

Recently, he’d taken to spreading your panties on one of your pillows, before burying his nose into the fabric. He’d lay on his stomach and pump his cock, imagining that you were actually there, that his nose was buried in your pussy. Sometimes he’d get so lost in the fantasy that he’d start humping the bed, caught up in the smells assaulting his senses, the sensation of the bedspread dragging along his swollen cock. 

Today was one of those days where he was keyed up and just wanted to get off, bask in the cradle of your scent as he did so. So the second he entered your apartment, he was beelining for your bedroom, cock already half-hard in his pants. He was delighted to see that your laundry basket seemed fuller than yesterday, meaning that there was a fresh pair of panties that you had discarded there this morning.

He wanted to pat himself on the back for his observational skills when a quick search brought him anew pair of your dirty panties. As he headed to the bed, unbuckling his belt with one hand, he noticed that these were new, a pale pink fabric that was impossibly softer then your other pairs. Bakugou knew he wouldn’t be long today, felt like he was bursting already. It took hardly any time to get himself situated, the movements easy and familiar after having done this dozens of times already. He let his hips drop to the bed, bringing his hands up to clutch at the pillow he had laid your panties on, imagining it to be the softness of your legs he was burying his fingers into.  Bakugou buried his face into the crotch, breathing deeply through his nose as he slowly started to work his hips, the friction on his cock feeling delicious.

Bakugou was so worked up, so immersed in his fantasy that the clattering sound of dropped objects almost made him yelp, the blonde man turning his head to the side to glare at whatever had made the noise. He was so close, wanted to tip over the edge of orgasmic bliss and lie there with his face pressed to your panties for a bit before he had to clean up. How dare your neighbors thump on the wall, cause something to fall while he was busy masturbating on your bed.

His breath stuttered as his eyes settled on your figure, frozen in the doorway. 

His hips stopped moving.

You shouldn’t have been home this early.

—— There was a man on your bed.

There was an attractive man on your bed, you noted as he turned his head towards you.

There was an attractive man on your bed, sniffing your panties. You could see the pink fabric strewn across your pillow, right where the man had previously had his face. Had he been… sniffing your underwear?

If you could’ve managed not to drop your phone and keys in shock at seeing a strange man on your bed, you would be able to dial 911 before he could get up. As it stood, you were frozen in shock.

Thankfully, the man was too, doing nothing but blinking and breathing heavily. “Who the fuck are you?” You were always one to speak your mind, but in this situation, you wished you were able to act with more tact. The man blinked at you slowly, reaching his hand underneath him to - “Oh my god, your dick is out.”

“No shit, Sherlock.” His gruff voice responded. 

“I don’t know who your are, but you need to get out. Get out now or I’m calling the police.”

The man grunted as he tucked his still-hard dick back into his pants, slowly rising to his knees, moving towards the edge of the bed.

“Hey! I said you need to fucking leave. I’m - I’m gonna - “ You snatched your phone off the floor, watching the man freeze as you held it up. “- call the police. Get out of my apartment.”

“Calm the fuck down, what the fuck d’ya think I’m doing, huh dumbass?”  He held his hands up, carefully stepping off your bed. “I gotta move past you to get to the damn door, idiot.” You wanted to smack yourself. The man had a point. He seemed to be gearing to leave, trying to appear non-threatening as he inched towards you and the bedroom door. It occurred to you that you should move to the side so he wouldn’t touch you while he exited your bedroom. You hoped he couldn’t see the way your hand shook holding your phone. You put up a tough front, but that didn’t mean you didn’t feel fear

“Okay, hurry up then.”

The blonde man nodded, lowering his hands as he began walking normally, watching you move to the side of the door. 

You tried to memorize his face, make sure you’d be able to describe him to the police later after you were safely alone in your apartment, door locked and reinforced with a chair-

The man tackled you to the floor, his hands wrapping around the back of your head to cushion it against the hardwood. He had taken advantage of your rambling thoughts, using your distracted state to strike when he had slunk closer in the guise of reaching the door.

You acted on instinct, immediately trying to knee the man the second you caught your breath, reaching up to claw at his face. You were in the process of going for his eyes, intending to dig in until he was screaming, but the next thing you knew you were being lifted into the air, given a giant bear hug that trapped your arms against your sides.

“Let me go! Let me go!!” You shrieked, uselessly kicking your legs against his shins. He had you pressed to his chest in a crushing hug, and the angle offered you no leverage to inflict any damage.

“Fuck, knew you were a feisty little shit. You smell so goddamn good.” He had his face buried in your hair, and you could feel the rise of his chest as he inhaled deeply. 

You were thrown on the bed, the man immobilizing you by sitting on your abdomen before you had the chance to even sit up. With a gleeful grin, he started pulling at your shirt, ripping it over your head with ease. He ignored your ear-splitting “No!” As he did the same to your bra, his calloused hands warm where they met your skin. You hit at his sides, but he hardly reacted. 

Rearranging himself so he was facing your feet, the man began working on your pants, laughing as you kicked and squirmed.

“See, this is why I fuckin’ like you so much. Got so much fight in you, won’t go down without a little bit of work.”

Your pants were removed, then your panties, which you saw the man shove in his pants pocket. It was impossible to stop him when he turned back to your head, taking his own shirt off in the process. No wonder he was hard to fight, he was incredibly ripped, fit in every sense of the word.

The man grabbed your shirt and stuffed it in your mouth, wrapping the sleeves around your head and using them to tie the fabric firmly into a makeshift gag, effectively muffling  your cursing.

As you reached up to pull it off, the man manhandled you again. He scooted back and grabbed your arms, placing them under his knees, locking his feet together into a butterfly stretch. He bent your lower half over, your knees almost touching your chest as he scooted closer, lifting your head up so he could lay it gently on his feet.

You were essentially folded in half, the man trapping your arms with his legs, your butt resting against his naked chest, his face above your exposed pussy. No matter how your thrashed or wiggled, you couldn’t break free. The man knew how to completely immobilize someone within seconds, and it scared you to no end.

You were screaming behind the gag, throat starting to hurt as you refused to quit fighting, no matter how futile it was. The man pressed his face down to your pussy, wrapping an arm around your waist to hike you up closer to his face as he inhaled, making you yell profanities behind the gag. What he was doing was gross, scary; blood was starting to rush to your head and you were so tense you thought you might blackout.

Amidst your panicked breathing, you noticed the man had paused, was staring down at you while he himself breathed heavily. You wished he wouldn’t - each breath he exhaled sent a warm puff of air across your pussy, causing your body to involuntarily clench.

“If you’d stop making so much goddamn noise, I might not have to be so rough. I get it though, you don’t know me. ‘M Bakugou.” He offered, red eyes boring into your skull. You seethed, before spitting out a “Fuck you.”. It was muffled, but the man understood your meaning, chuckling darkly. “Yeah yeah, we might get to doing that shit later.”

You yelled, only to gasp as the man suddenly buried his face into your pussy, nose pressing against your clit. He started licking immediately, warm tongue wet and textured against your slit.  

It felt good.

You didn’t want it to.

The hand that wasn’t wrapped around your waist was fumbling against your back, between you and Bakugou. You were too focused on what was happening to your cunt to realize that the blonde was taking his dick out again, tenderly massaging the drooling head as he breathed in your pungent scent.

Bakugou was in heaven, lapping at your juices and inhaling your natural musk. He wished he could stay here forever, holding you close as he made the both of you feel good.

He groaned into your pussy, fisting his cock faster as he plunged his warm tongue inside your hole, wiggling the muscle and scraping at your walls. You twitched, your hips trying to rock back to chase the sensation even though your mind was screaming for them to still. Bakugou brought his tongue out, before thrusting is back in, essentially fucking you with his wet tongue.

It was humiliating, terrifying as you watched him, his red eyes slitted and clouded with lust as he drank in your scared whimpers, the man liking when your eyes squeezed shut when he did something with his tongue that you found particularly pleasurable. With a lewd squelch, the man stopped tongue-fucking you, moving to flick at your clit with the muscle, rubbing it back and forth in an agonizingly good motion.

With a muffled wail, you came.

Bakugou sped up the hand around his length, pumping himself furiously as he lapped at you through your orgasm, making you writhe with pleasure. He moaned as he reached his own orgasm, warm cum shooting from his cock to paint your back.

It was only when you started to squirm from oversensitivity did Bakugou stop mouthing at your pussy.  He laid his head against your thigh, still huffing and nuzzling at your pussy like a dog trying to scent.

You felt so disgusting.

Trying to kick at Bakugou was useless in this position, especially with how weak you were from orgasming but you still tried your best before his hands gripped your thighs tightly.

“Don’t get fuckin’ testy with me now.”  He leaned closer, smiling at you darkly. “You don’t gotta worry, imma fuck you real good before I take your ass home.”

[thisisgonnafuxkinkillme]

Pro Heros Comforting an S/O with various chronic illnesses

All Might/ Yagi Toshinori

For being a chronically ill person, you were a big baby about being sick. Well, for you, there was two types of ‘being sick’. One, the usual, was the everyday upkeep of your body, with the usual minimal discomfort of working a machine with missing or loose parts. On the other hand, another type of ‘sick’ would be you hunched over the toilet, or sweating in bed with a trashcan by your face, or sobbing in the shower because of how shit you feel. 

Today was one of those sick sick days. 

You never admitted to anyone when you were having an especially hard day like today, sometimes not even yourself. In between bouts of puking up the small amount of food you should’ve been able to keep down, you’d convince yourself that it was just because it was stale, or that this was a fluke, or even try telling yourself that you were over reacting. 

So when your boyfriend gently asked if you were feeling okay to be home by yourself, you enthusiastically replied, “of course I am! Go ahead and go to work, I’ll be fine!”

So, he did. 

And you were definately not fine. 

Mere moments after he left, you were hovering over the toilet bowl, heaving up bile. You screamed at your body to just stop, to please just give up, but it couldn’t hear you. Instead, it did what it knew how to do best: be sick.

Finally, it was over, and you found refuge pressed up against the cool tile of the bathroom floor. 

You were a mess of sweat, tears, snot, and puke. 

Thinking of that just made even more tears stream out of your puffy eyes. 

Pathetic. 

You shakily turned on the shower. Maybe a cold shower will snap you out of it. Your clothes didn’t matter; they’re just pajamas. So, you crawled into the shower, looking for refuge. 

The ice cold water pelted your blanched flesh mercilessly, providing both relief and shock to your system.

You squeezed your eyes shut, trying your best to ignore your cramping abdomen and pay attention to the cool, refreshing liquid rolling down your back. 

In the end, though, you couldn’t focus on either of these things. 

Someone knocked at the bathroom door. By the way the person knocked, light and inquisitive, you knew it had to be him. 

He called out your name.

“Are you okay in there? Something told me to come check on you one more time,” he asked through the door. You opened your mouth, but nothing came out. He knocked again, a little harder this time. 

Still, you didn’t have the strength to respond. You rested your head onto the shower wall weakly. 

The doorknob wiggled noisily before he was in. 

“Oh, honey...” he murmured as he fully understood the situation. He flushed the toilet and opened the window to let in some fresh air. 

“I’m going to open up the shower now, okay?” 

He carefully pulled back the curtain and turned off the water. His heart panged to see you struggling like this. 

Like him.

He took a moment to cradle your cheek in his palm, cooing your name.

“I’m going to get you some fresh clothes. Don’t try standing up by yourself, okay? I’ll be right back,” he instructed gently. You nodded weakly.

He returned with some fresh pajamas and a towel. You shook your head.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” he inquired, stroking your hair. You couldn’t help but begin to cry. It was so humiliating being taken care of. Hell, even needing to be taken care of was degrading. 

You squeaked out tiny words between sobs. He patiently tried his best to understand what had you so upset, but he just couldn’t hear you. 

So, his only chioce was to continue to clean you up. 

Gently, ever so gently, he dried you with the towel as best as he could with your soaked clothes on.

“Pumpkin, I hate to ask you this, but...can I take off these clothes to help you get into new ones? I promise I won’t look.” 

You sobbed pitifully. 

“I...Let me...let me try,” you managed to get out. He nodded.

“I’ll be right outside the door. Knock if you need any help at all,” he assured, kissing you sweetly on the forehead before leaving you alone. 

It wasn’t that you didn’t want him to see you naked; he already had done that. It was just...you didn’t want him to see you like this.

Shakily, you stood up, grabbing the clothes. Your feet stepped out of the tub, only supported on shakey knees.

Knees that gave up on you.

Within an instant, you were collapsed onto the floor. You gasped at the impact, the wind being knocked out of you.

Toshinori was by your side before you could blink. He helped you sit up, asking tenderly if you were in any pain. You shrugged.

He sighed deeply.

“I...I’m so... sorry. You shouldn’t-“ you stammered before he shut you down.

“No. I should. It’s okay for you to need help. I understand. It’s not an inconvenience.”

“...but... your job... your students...”

“They’ll be fine. Right now, let me focus on you,” he asserted. You nodded, allowing him to undress and towel dry you before redressing you.

“Can you stand?” He asked. You thought for a moment before shaking your head. Instantly, the bathroom filled with smoke, and he appeared to you in his much more muscular form in order to carry you.

He being sick himself could never hope to carry you in his skinnier state.

You didn’t care however he looked. It was just that he was there. That he cared.

You were carried bridal style to your bed, and placed down ever so gingerly. Smoke surrounded you once again, cradling you for a moment before dissipating and revealing your boyfriend in his true form.

He leaned against the bed frame, coughing into a tissue.

A pang of guilt hit you, seeing how he’d sacrificed just a tiny bit of himself to keep you comfortable.

You pushed the guilt away, replacing it with warm love.

Instead of apologizing, you murmured a “Thank you.”

Aizawa Shouta

Today was a good day. Your joints weren’t achey, and you felt good enough to even go to the store with your boyfriend. Usually, he’d go by himself, or do a curb side pickup to save time, but you insisted that you wanted to go.

“Sho, please. I’ll be fine,” you assured him.

“I don’t want you to overwork yourself,” he replied skeptically. He knew your fighting spirit coming through when he saw your determined eyes, so he knew his words were of no use. However, he also was deeply worried about the pain that could show up later on that night.

Those were the hardest on Aizawa. He usually wasn’t home at night, so when he’d come into the bedroom and see the bedsheets strewn across the floor and your pain medications sitting idly on your dresser, the cap on sideways, he’d be instantly racked with guilt. He wanted to be there for you. Even if it meant seeing you in pain. He just wanted to be able to do whatever he possibly could to help alleviate things just a little for you.

Today, though, he relented, and you found yourself at the local grocery store. You chose to not bring your cane, opting to try to pretend that you were a perfectly healthy young person.

Bad idea.

About half way through your shopping trip, you could feel the beginnings of a flare up.

“Sho... Could you help me?”

He instantly took on your weight on one arm.

“Do you need to go home?” He asked quietly as to not stir the other customers. You shook your head.

“I’ll get you something. Hold on.”

And like that, he was gone and you were alone in the bread aisle.

You sighed, rubbing your forehead.

Stupid! You should’ve known better!

It wasn’t long before he was back, riding on a mobility scooter. He stood up, gesturing towards it.

You knew it’d help, but...

“What will people think?” You whimpered before you could even think about it.

He scoffed.

“Geez, baby. I hope you realize that other people’s opinions should never trump your own comfort.”

You nodded, still anxious about how it’d look for someone like you to be using something like that.

“But...what if someone actually needs it?” You ask as you guide yourself into the seat.

“You need it. It’s okay,” he reassured plainly.

That night, you had no pain. All your body was filled with was butterflies as Aizawa gently cuddled you to sleep.

Sir Nighteye/Mirai Sasaki

You’ve always been sick. It was a part of your identity that you’d come to terms with. Sure, your life was shaped different than everyone else’s, but you didn’t mind much. 

You brewed yourself some tea, breathing in the fresh steam from the kettle. The warm air made its way past your oxygen tube, warming you from the inside out. Today was going to be a good day. You could tell that much by the light rays of sun filtering past the blinds, and the way you weren’t a coughing mess by now. Usually, you were signaled to remember to take your meds and do your treatments by your own sputtering and coughing, but today, things were going a little different so far. 

Your boyfriend came into the kitchen, stretching a little, causing his bones to crack and pop. He retrieved his black coffee from the pot, lightly and lovingly brushing his hand across your upper arm as he moved. 

You instantly tensed up.

“Don’t do that,” you frowned, glaring at him, “it’s too early in the morning to think about that yet.”

He raised an eyebrow, feigning innocence.

“Your quirk. Don’t use it on me.”

He put both hands up, “If you wish for me not to touch you, I won’t.”

“That’s...not what I’m asking for and you know it.”

He allowed himself a tiny smile. He did know that. 

You turned around, moving your attention back to your tea. Mirai stared at you lovingly as he sipped on his drink. 

Two sugar cubes plopped into the tea, honey and lemon being stirred in next. Just how you like it.

Just as you were getting enveloped in the whirlpool you made with your spoon, Mirai broke your train of thought.

“Today’s going to be a good day,” he murmured.

[nevertheless-moving]

Suicidal Misunderstanding XVI

Part I - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Part XIII - - - - Part XIV - - - - Part XV

Star Wars Time Travel AU #27

Masters Aerdo, Koon and Nu lurched forward in distress as Obi-Wan unceremoniously slammed his mental walls into place.

“I’m fine, I’m fine!” He reassured them, smiling weakly and rubbing his temples.

“Cutting yourself off so abruptly from the force after a meditation that deep is dangerous,” Master Aerdo said, alarmed. “Please endeavor to be more gentle with yourself, Master Kenobi.”

“Of course, I simply thought it would be be best to allow for some, ah, uncertainty with my retreat to counteract my... necessary indiscretion.”

“Uncertainty!” Plo scolded. “If I hadn’t been in same room as you I might have thought you were dead!”

“Well, yes, that’s rather-”

Vokara Che burst through the door, followed closely by Bant Eerin.

“PLO KOON! WHAT IN THE GALACTIC CORE HAVE YOU DONE TO MY PATIENT!”

Master Koon took a step back, “Vokara, please-”

“I’m perfectly alright, Master Che,” Obi-Wan interjected, “Master Koon has helped me beyond what I can ever repay. I- Oh dear. You all have.” Obi-Wan looked around, guilt creeping into his voice. “Oh. OH. I am so sorry for what I must have put you all through. I- I assure you, it wasn’t what it looked like. Thank you so much for all you’ve done to save me from...well, my own foolishness, I suppose. Oh that must have been- I deeply apologize for the inconvenience I’ve caused.”

Master Che took a deep breath. “Your good health is repayment enough for whatever debt you feel you might owe. May I take your recent...reaching out to mean that you have begun to regain your sense of where and when you are and no longer feel the need for more...drastic means of escape? Alarming raising of shields notwithstanding?”

Obi-Wan winced. “I am...still confused on a number of points, I admit. But I’ve cleared up most of my important doubts. Its... 7957 by the Centralized Republic Calendar. I’m in the temple Halls of Healing on Couracant. Everyone in this room is a fellow member of Jedi Order.” Obi-Wan hastily wiped away a few tears forming in the corners of his eyes. 

He cleared his throat as the five onlookers watched with a mixture of sympathy and confusion. “It’s going to be difficult, but I owe you all an explanation. Actually I need to explain a few things quite urgently, but first-”

His train of thought was interrupted by the roiling force presence that proceeded Mace Windu’s entrance. Mace paused at the foot of the bed, eyeing Obi-Wan critically as everyone else shuffled slightly out of the way to the edges of the increasingly crowded room. 

“Master Kenobi. You’re looking better.” He finally said.

“I’m feeling better. You really can’t imagine. I’m sure you have questions, but first I must insist- ow!” Obi-Wan jerked back, startled by the sudden rap of a gimer stick on the side of his head.

“Master Yoda!” Che and Aerdo scolded as the Grandmaster suddenly appeared on the nightstand to get a better look at his troublesome great-grand padawan.

 Vokara actually grabbed the wizened elder with both hands, lifting him by the armpits and chastising him like a misbehaving youngling. “That is not an appropriate greeting for any of my patients. Shame on you.”

“Patients, hmm? Shame, shame indeed.” Yoda muttered, dangling in the air. “Gone, my patience is. For making us think he had joined the force too early, shame indeed on Obi-Wan.” 

Obi-Wan bowed his head. “My apologies, grandmaster. I had strong reason to believe that I was trapped in a hallucination. I will explain everything but first we really need to comm-”

“Your suicide attempt, I was not referring to, no. Do such a thing in your right mind, I know you would never. Concerned, we were, of course. Halfway fake your own death, the first thing you did was, after all this! The reason I am hitting you, that is! Too old for this, I am!” 

“I understand, and I had reason for retreating so suddenly. Which I will be happy to explain. But first we really need to do damage control and contact-”

- - - - -

“ANAKIN! Anakin, what’s wrong!” Padme shook her husband’s shoulders as he knelt, collapsed on the floor.

“It’s- Obi-Wan” he choked out. “He was here! He was awake and alive and then he just- stopped.” 

“Oh force. You don’t mean he’s-”

“I don’t know. I can’t sense him. I don’t know.”

“Go. And when you find him, please comm me to let me know if-”

But Anakin was already gone.

- - - - -

"Oh...hm.” Master Tiin shuddered slightly.

“Sir? Is everything alright?” Captain Rex asked.

“Does this have something to do with General Kenobi’s illness?” Boil called out anxiously. A low murmur rippled through the mixed meeting of high-level strategic and logistical officers. 

“His- force presence grew rather strong for a moment. I would have to contact the temple to-”

“He’s dead.”

“Master Krell!” Saesee Tiin chided as the room recoiled in horror. “We don’t know that.”

General Tiin addressed the anxious room, “His force presence did cut out abruptly, but there are a number of explanations for such a thing, and jumping to the worst case scenario prematurely does us no favors.”

“Perhaps we should pause the briefing while you contact the Temple, sir.” Commander Cody offered stiffly.

“Out of line, Clone.” General Krell said, sneering. “Regardless of the status of your former General, we depart at 22:00 hours this evening. This briefing will continue. Interrupt with such a meaningless and insubordinate suggestion again and I will have you put on review for decommissioning.”

“Yes, sir.” Cody replied.

“That’s enough, Master Krell. I realize tensions are running high but please control yourself.” Tiin sighed. “We do need to finish this planning session. I apologize for the disruption, everyone. Now if you will all turn your attention back to map 3a of the Ghost Nebula...”

Command training included modules on compartmentalizing unhelpful emotional responses in order to focus on tactical information, so that’s what Cody did.

- - - - -

“If you have some Sith-related intel to divulge, I think it might be more appropriate to contact the rest of the council first, Master Kenobi,” Mundi said, discarded fluid drip awkwardly jabbing him in the side . 

“I agree, but trust me, first, someone really needs to tell Anakin I’m not dead. If you don’t want to do it, I will,” Obi-Wan announced, trying to get up. 

“You’re not going anywhere,” Bant snapped, pushing him back into bed.

“I- Oh Bant, It’s- some things are fuzzy, but you were one of the medi staff who came to my quarters after I...”

Bant glared in answer. 

“I am so sorry, again I-” 

“Obi-Wan, try not to worry too much about apologies right now. The important thing is you have people who care about you and we are all pleased by your renewed vigor for life.” Healer Aerdo interrupted, maintaining a death grip on Yoda while Che fussed over Obi-Wan’s vital readings. 

“I’ve commed Skywalker but if he’s acting as I suspect, he’s not checking messages” Master Windu said from his place in the corner.

- - - - - 

A Chiss Padawan leaned over to whisper to her Master as the mental flow halted unceremoniously. “Master, you don’t think...”

“Is something wrong, young one?” Chancellor Palpatine called out, smiling warmly at the young apprentice and drawing all eyes in the sub-committee meeting to the cloaked pair standing watch at the door.

“Ah, no, Supreme Chancellor, thank you for your concern. We simply observed a minor disruption in the force,” Her Tholothian Master replied smoothly as the padawan attempted not to fidget. “I’m sure the Council will contact us if it’s anything worth reporting to the Senate.” 

The meeting continued but more than a few senators spent the remainder of the session discretely swapping messages speculating on what could have ruffled the usually silent and stoic guardians. 

- - - - -

Shouted curses and wailing speeder horns followed Anakin as he raced to the temple. 

I swear to all the gods if he’s alive i’ll never kill anyone ever again I should have been there was no warning in the force please help me if he’s dead i’m going to kill everyone on this planet except Padme and then im going to kill Dooku and Grevious and then

- - - - -

“Master Fisto!” Ashoka said, turning anxiously to the Natuolan Master as Obi-Wan’s presence evaporated. “Do you think Master Kenobi is alright?”

“We’re quite a distance away,” Kit replied soothingly. “There’s a very good chance he simply had to withdraw because he was overreaching himself to say hello.” 

Ashoka frowned. “Can we contact the temple to make sure? Please?”

“I’ll send a comm, but we might not get a reply right away. We’re only a few hours out from the planet, so you’ll be able to check in on him yourself soon, alright?”

“Yes, Master.”

- - - - -

“Ah...perhaps we should shift into another room? This one is a little small for the...full Jedi Council. And I wouldn’t mind the opportunity to change out of these patients robes and into something a little more appropriate”

“You’re not going anywhere or changing into anything until I clear you.” Che snapped, elbowing Koth out of the way to jab Obi-Wan with another device.

“If one of the high council is unable to leave this room, than the high council is more than willing to meet here.” Master Gallia said calmly from her perch at the foot of the bed.  

“Well I’m not leaving.” Master Nu announced. “I still haven’t gotten the full explanation Plo promised.”

“As a healer-”

- - - - -

Klicks apart from one another, Sith Assassin Ventress and Knight Vos unknowingly shared identical frowns as Quinlan softly gave voice to what they were both thinking,

“What the fuck, Kenobi.”

- - - - - 

“WATCH OUT!”

“Kriff!”

“...Was that Anakin Skywalker? Did The Hero With No Fear just cut us off?”

“Must be some serious business for him to be flying like that.”

- - - - - 

Count Dooku redirected the Invisible Hand; his plans for Kiros would simply have to wait. Sidious might prefer the Umbaran seige to be a long, protracted affair rather than a decisive win one way or another, but if Tyrannus’s suspicions were correct, than the time for kowtowing to the Sith Master might be near its end. Sidious had long underestimated his Grandpadawan. He suspected that whatever play was going on was less the act of a new player and more the opening move of an experience one now shifting his attention to another arena. 

The ‘attack’ was likely a deliberate ruse to allow Kenobi to slip into the shadows and finally begin addressing the hint he had provided on Genosis long ago. Now, more than ever, Dooku needed to manage Separatist affairs strategically. Kenobi’s search into the force and subsequent rapid withdraw was too deliberate to be anything but the first steps of a larger plot. 

- - - - -

“Ah, Master Mundi?” A young apprentice healer asked the Cerean Master guarding the entranceway to the wing. “There’s a small crowd gathering outside. All very orderly, of course. But they want to know Master Kenobi’s Status. What should I tell them?”

Mundi Sighed. “If they ask, tell them Master Kenobi’s wellbeing is protected under healer client confidentiality and the highest security clearance.” 

Ki-Adi paused. “If Anakin Skywalker, arrives, just- send him this way, as you would a Council Member, understood? Don’t try and stop him.” he added begrudgingly.

“I see.” the padawan replied with impressive professional calm, "Thank you, Master Mundi” She bowed and returned to the front.

- - - - -

Maul staggered out of his cave. Kenobi was taunting him now. Kenobi would pay. Kenobi would see. Kenobi couldn’t die before Maul killed him.

- - - - -

A gap opened in the somber crowd as Anakin sprinted through, heart in his throat.

He should have been here there was no warning he should have been there

“Skywalker!” Mundi barked. “Calm yourself!”

Anakin stared at him with wild eyes and the High Master faltered, frightened for a moment. Before Anakin could say or do anything to the council member, Master Windu appeared. “Over here.”

Anakin blurred past him, mind tormenting him with images of nooses and blood and broken bodies and incomplete-

“Hello there, Anakin.” Obi-Wan sat upright in bed, smiling at him and surrounded by far too many Master’s for anyone’s comfort. Least of all the Masters, now that Mundi and Windu were forcing their back in. 

Anakin took in a strangled gasp, “Obi-Wan- you- i thought you were dead.”

Obi-Wan’s welcoming smile faltered. “Oh Anakin, I’ve really put you through a terrible ordeal the last few days, haven’t I? I am so, so sorry- I- I promise I didn’t intend to leave you like that. Come here, I’ll- its going to sound quite impossible but I can explain everything. There’s so much I have to tell everyone-”

Anakin threw himself forward, ignoring Jedi dignity and who he was knocking over.

He heard a tut of disapproval behind him as he embraced his Master. 

“Oh be quiet” Master Koon chided someone. “Honestly, he’s padawan age, have some compassion.”

Anakin decided to ignore that in favor of crying over Obi-Wan for the fourth time in as many days, utterly exhausted. 

Obi-Wan hesitated for a bare moment before wrapping his arms around his brother and friend for the first time in years (at least for the first time where he was aware that it was real and oh force he was really going to have to meditate to fully understand what he had said and done and what everyone had said in response).

“Perhaps we should give them a moment to collect themselves.” Master Aerdo offered diplomatically. Having largely reached their threshold for open displays of emotion, the Council non-verbally came to an agreement.

“You two have five minutes to pull yourselves together,” Master Windu said severely. 

“Of course, Master Windu. Thank you.” Obi-Wan rasped.

The group shuffled out with remarkable good grace, considering the number of inhabitants in the room, or rather remarkable bad grace, considering they were all supposed to be Jedi Masters.

Plo Koon patted them both on the shoulders before filing out. Master Yoda leapt nimbly out of Bant’s arms to land on the nightstand. He rapped them each lightly on the head before darting out with a chuckle. The door clicked shut.

“Master- I- never do that again.”

“I’m sorry Anakin, I promise, I wasn’t trying to die, I have far, far too much to live for. I’m never going to leave you again, I don’t care what else happens but- I’m not going to abandon you ever again, do you understand. Even if I die, I’ll come back and haunt you for the rest of your life, you’ll barely notice the difference, I swear.”

“...Thank you, but please stop talking now”

“Right, of course. I’m sorry. I’m so, so-”

“I love you, Obi-Wan.”

“...I love you too, Anakin.”

Part XVII

[damnzawa]

Hi there! I just found your account and I love you writing! I was wondering if you could do a bakugou x reader fantasy au? Where prince bakugou goes to a small village in his kingdom for a pit stop while on a quest but meets the reader who's a poor butcher's daughter that doesn't know who he is and doesn't really care either but really wants to go on a quest and begs him to let her travel with him in exchange for being a chef. Thank you so much!!💞💕💗 ⁽⁽ଘ( ˊᵕˋ )ଓ⁾⁾┌(★ｏ☆)┘

ANNOYING — B. KATSUKI

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Sorry if this took a long time to be published! I went off tumblr for a while due to personal issues but now I'm back! Hope you like this!

REQUESTS ARE CLOSED (for now)

WARNINGS: Language LMAO but its Bakugo so what do we expect. Also this is not beta read!

WORD COUNT: 1955

Not everyday you have the privilage to meet the prince. The heir to the kingdom's throne. The second most respected man in the whole entire kingdom.

And not everyday you get to mistake him as a thief either.

Not that you care about his title, really. You believe that all men are created equal, regardless of their social standings, heirarchy and whatnot. Thus, you didn't really care about the prince and the royal family that much to ever know about them. Not even their faces, nor names.

So, it wasn't a surprise that it will cause you your possible demise.

You see, the day started nice. You went out to do some deliveries, met some nice people on the road who bought half of the meat your father had cut, and to top it all off the farmer was kind enough to give you extra rootcrops as a sign of gratitude to you and your father. It was a great day all in all. Until, the knights came.

Along with the explosive prince.

Murmurs began to start as you headed back to your father's stall in the market after a long day of delivery work. Even though you didn't mean to eavesdrop — it was kind of hard not to, considering how their volumes were — you caught the words: arrogant, self-centered, short-tempered. And later you found out those words described the prince.

"He must be a nincompoop then. To get such a reputation from the people in town, he must have done some... questionable things." You said to yourself. Too engrosed in your thoughts, you bumped into a red-headed knight. You bowed immediately while apologizing then excused yourself, you didn't really want to interact with knights today. All you wanted to do was cook a hearty meal for your stubborn father, read a book by the fireplace after a bath, and relax.

But all those plans seem to be quickly washed away when you saw an ash blond quietly steal from your father. You were gonna let it slide, thinking that maybe it was for a good cause.

That is until you realized, the man stole a prime cut.

As if a switch was flicked, you quickly ran towards the direction the man headed to. Spotting him from afar, you ran as fast as you can and knocked the man into the ground, shocking the people around you.

"Give it back." You sternly commanded the man. "Give back the meat you stole from my father."

The man scoffed at your 'accusations' and tried to wiggle his way free but your entire weight placed on top of his back made it hard to do so. "Let me fucking go. I have no idea what the actual fuck you are accusing me of."

"Oh shut it. I saw you with my own two eyes and I am very much sure that their vision is not impaired yet." His futile attempts at escaping now stopped as he tilted his head to see the scoundrel who had the audacity to knock him down and embarrass him infront of townspeople.

Of course it had to be a girl.

"Are you one of my admirers to go such lengths as accusing me of stealing from a commoner?" That comment made your eye twitch because first, you are certainly not an admirer of this prick. Two, you don't even know the guy! Three, who would admire this piece of work? And lastly, your father might be a 'commoner' but he's the best 'commoner' you could ever find! There wouldn't be a slab of ribs or a fine piece of steak on your plates if it weren't for him! And the way this asshole said 'commoner' with such distaste too! What a prick! Who the hell does he think he is?

"My prince!" The same red-headed knight you bumped into earlier shouted from afar. Your eyes widened for a second before turning back to the asshole beneath you who now has a smug grin on his face.

"Miss! Are you alright?" The knight asked while helping you get up. "Did the prince cause you any disturbances? Any problems?" It was your turn to plaster on a smug grin on your face. You saw his own falter which you made you more smug than before.

"Why yes actually, the prince caused me a slight inconvenience." The red-head sighed, taking a quick glance at the prince beside him — who couldn't stand due to pain. "The prince stole a priceless little thing from my father's stall earlier and I'd like for him to return it or better yet, pay for it." The prince was about to retort but the red-head beat him to it.

"I deeply apologize for the prince's action, miss. If it would make you happy and satisfied, I will pay for the items he stole. I will also ask for forgiveness on his behalf." Angry noises came from the prince's (beast) mouth as the red-headed knight did exactly what he told making you raise an eyebrow.

"Why are you doing it for him? Can't he do it himself?" It was amazing to see a knight easily convinced to do something a mere 'commoner' like you demanded, but you concluded that this red-headed fellow wasn't an ordinary knight. He seemed like the type that's fed up with the prince's antics, thus his demeanor towards people is filled with empathy and the usual knightly courage. But your words made him halt, and look at you as if you were from some otherworldly land.

You caught the knight mutter about something manly before the prince interrupted. "Hah?! I'm not gonna apologize to someone lower than me! You extra!" The knight sweat-dropped at the prince's words while you looked at him blankly. Wow, the rumors are true, he is an asshole.

"Well, Your Highness, this extra happened to be the one who cared for the rib who used to be a part of the cow that you stole just now. So, apologize and pay up. I don't care if you're the prince or not. Thievery is a crime, and you just committed it." The crowd begin to whisper, making the prince's eye twitch.

"Fine, you annoying extra! Give her whatever the fuck she wants!" And with that the prince stormed off. Leaving you and the red-haired knight behind. The crowd began to disperse, seeing as the scene just concluded and that the man of the hour was gone.

The knight turned to you once again and bowed. "I'm deeply sorry for my prince's actions. As he caused such an inconvenience and refuses to be accountable for his actions, I shall ensure to provide whatever compensation you need or want — within reason of course." Before you can respond, he introduces himself with a grin. "Ah! How silly of me! Chivalric knight, Kirishima Eijirou at your service."

"I appreciate your efforts, Sir Kirishima, but I just need the payment for the stolen goods." You replied with a smile, but soon your smile faltered. You had wanted to be a chef for so long and travel unknown lands to discover cuisine and cooking techniques you've never heard of before. Perhaps... is this the right time to do it?

You bit your lip as you contemplated. Should you grab this opportunity and run with it?

Seeing your hesitancy, Kirishima waited for your answer. "Actually... I have a request... I was wondering if it's possible?"

"I'm all ears, Miss."

...

"What is this extra doing here?!" Prince Bakugo exclaimed as he saw your annoying little face within his traveling party. Kirishima sighed as he explained the situation. You would join his party as a chef until you reach the capital where you will be training to be a chef under the great Lunch Rush. Bakugo was about to object when Kirishima shot him a look.

"Fine. But I'm not eating garbage cooked by a commoner!" You rolled your eyes at his demeanor. Are all royals like this?

As if reading your mind, Kirishima responds. "Don't worry. King Masaru and Queen Mitsuki are quite modest and kind."

"Then what happened to him?" You pointed to Bakugo.

"I heard that, you extra!" Fowl language followed that statement making the traveling party sigh. Oh boy, this is gonna be a painful journey.

After that, you said your goodbyes to your father, who was very emotional about the turn of events. "Be good and be brave, my sweet child. And ask for forgiveness from His Highness." Your brows were scrunched in confusion.

"Why must I do that? He was clearly in the wrong!"

"Ah... that slab of meat was a present from me to him. He once helped me round up the cows when his traveling party went by our house yesterday. The slab of priceless meat was a token of appreciation for his kind gesture. So, do apologize for your actions, ok?" The information you just heard astounded you, making you speechless. Guilt pooled in your stomach as you promised your father that you will apologize to the prince. And with a final promise of coming home as a renowned chef, you parted ways.

The journey started rough. The prince refused to eat anything you made at all. His stubbornness knows no bounds and his overall demeanor towards you was not pleasant, which you understood as the scene you caused was a total misunderstanding on your part. The only upside was the traveling party greatly enjoyed your meals, and some even gave you recipes from different places and suggestions of destinations that you'll surely enjoy to explore! Overall, it went smoothly.

That is, until the prince became sick.

The doctors in your traveling party asked you to concoct different meals suited to His Highness, You had to stop at a village in order to ensure Prince Bakugo's speedy recovery. And one day, you were assigned to deliver his meals to him personally.

"Prince Bakugo?" You knocked on the door, and as expected, not a response came from the prince. You sighed and slowly opened the door, cautiously stepping in so you won't wake Bakugo up or spill the contents of the bowl you held.

"Go away, you extra." He grumbled, but his rough voice was replaced with a weak ome due to his illness.

"Look, I know you won't eat my meals but you need to eat. You can't recover from this if your body doesn't have the nutrients it needs to fight back this illness." You huffed. "And... besides, consider this as my way of making up to you."

"What the heck are you talking about?"

"My father told me about it. I'm sorry for mistaking you for a thief. I tried to apologize to you on several occasions but you angrily push me away every time I do. So, I figured this might be the right timing since you know... you aren't your usual aggressive self." You scratched your nape in embarrassment. "Besides, if there's something I learned while traveling with you is that you're a big softie inside. You might act rough and is shard on the edges, you're actually kind-hearted and caring. Uh... anyways. Please make sure to eat your meal, Prince Bakugo."

Before you can exit the room, you heard him say, "Annoying extra." But the usual hostility behind those words wasn't there. You might just be assuming it or imagining it, but those words almost sounded... fond.

With a shake of your head, you left the room.

Later that day, you found the bowl to be empty and outside of his room. Along with it was a note that read, "Don't fucking tell me what to do, you annoying extra."

[joskippy]

!!! ARCHIVIST MARTIN HEADCANONS PLS !!!

OHOHOH FELLA YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH HCS I HAVE FOR THIS AU

Literally all of this is going under a read more because I have this entire au mapped out in detail but basically I find the idea of Archivist!Martin very interesting because it's just changing one detail of the entire podcast and it completely alters the story.

(Under the read more is basically my entire idea for this au from season one to season four)

What happens in this au is that Elias hires and appoints Martin as head archivist because of the fact he was already deeply alligned with the lonely and was a interests of the webs. He lacked any real connection outside of the archives and was already of interest of two entities, he's basically a perfect candidate to become archivist. Tim, Sasha, and especially Jon are hesitant to be working under someone who they don't know and hold a slight grudge against Martin at the start for being obviously unqualifed for his job. Tim and Sasha, of course, immediately become more understanding when finding out about Martin's cv and just assuming he got unlucky and winded up with the role as the head archivist. Jon, on the other hand, still doesn't know about Martin's cv and continues holding the grudge against Martin.

Which leads us to season 1

In season one, Jon's opinion on Martin is "Oh lord this man I don't know is obviously unqualifed for his job and the role of archivist should've gone to my friend Sasha. I don't like this man but he is my boss so I will keep my mouth shut." Jon though, is still very passive agressive to Martin but is less of an ass to him in this au. Martin is very open about his opinion on statements and believes alot of them but similar to jon, will only record the ones that he knows have to be real. I still think Martin get's trapped in his flat by prentiss in this au, wanting to get more info for the case but not wanting to inconvenience any of his co-workers. While trapped in his flat, Jon takes over for him and records statements for Martin (Not in a "I want to impress my boss" matter but more of an "I'll show this twerp how it's really done") and realizes how much of toll it takes on him and how difficult the job is. When Martin comes back from his little worm adventure, Jon is much more nicer and understanding of him. Martin records what happened with him and prentiss and Jon offers him to stay in the little room he made for when he overstays at work. (Martin of course, is not happy with the fact Jon stays past work hours finishing up stuff but that doesnt matter). Y'know how the rest of s1 goes with the prentiss attack (Jon and Martin still share the heart to heart, Jon loses him and Tim in the tunnels) Jon finds Gertrude's body and it sparks his paranoia finding out she was shot to death and then we get to

Season 2

Jon's immediate assumption is that Martin killed Gertrude to get his job because like, he still doesn't know Martin well and then finds out this dude's predecessor got murdered so of course mr jon sims is going to go "oh so Martin for SURE murdered this lady." For the first half of the season, Jon pretends to be buddy buddy with Martin to see if anything's off with him and somewhere along the line Jon finds the noted Martin was writing to his mom in the trash and immediately assumes its about the murder. He catches Martin in his office and immediately corners Martin like "HEY I KNOW YOU KILLED GERTRUDE AND I GOT THE PROOF" and Martin just sighs and tells him about his cv and mother and Jon's opinion of Martin goes from "incompetent murderer who killed his predecessor to get his job and might kill me." to "highschool drop out whos just trying to make a living might end up being murdered too". With the not-sasha stuff it's sorta the same but Martin let's Jon in on some details of his suspicions on her. Martin get's framed for Jurgen's death and NOW WE ARE AT

Season 3

So since Martin obviously doesn't have a place to hide it at the start of season 3 so Jon offers him to stay at his place. Jon knows that Martin didn't kill Jurgen and is willing to take the risk of giving Martin a  place to stay. Martin, of course, is hesitant but takes the offer because he's been crushing on Jon for the past forever and definitely will take his chances in staying in hot guy's flat. You know the shenanigans of s3 (Martin get's burned by Jude, kidnapped by Daisy, kipdnapped by Nikola) and FINALLY get's back into the archives to apologize to Jon for being gone from the flat for so long and apologizes again cause he's about to go off to america. Martin get's kidnapped again, comes back to london, and now it's time to stop an apocalypse! ( Before the unknowing happens, Jon and Martin share a heart to heart and confess that they both share feelings for another and get together the day before 118 happens then shit goes DOWN ). Martin of course, goes off to the unknowing and Jon stays behind at the archives to distract Elias. Elias tries and fails to use Jon's feelings for Martin against him, then switches to what happened with Georgie and the dead women walking incidents against him, pinning it on him because of his connection with the web. Martin stops the unknowing, Jon comes home to the empty apartment and gets the news that Martin is in a coma. (He immediately blames it on himself) and now it's time for

Season 4

Jon losing Martin right after realizing that they both love each other absolutely tears him apart. He moves flats and he begins to separate himself from the rest of the archives and works with peter. Martin wakes up from his coma without anyone by his side and is told the news to him about his mom right the day after. S4 basically goes the same with Martin seeing Jon again finally after the coma and goes to hug him and tell him how much he missed him but Jon just stares at him like he saw a ghost and leaves without saying a word to him. Alot of their interactions are sparse, usually with Martin trying to spark a convo with Jon resulting in usually no response or just a head shake as he scutters off.  Then Martin finally is able to actually talk to Jon and tells him that he misses him and that maybe they could catch up sometime but Jon just laughs and tells him that hes busy. Martin later on finds out about how to cut off the connection with the eye and goes to tell Jon that they could leave the archives but Jon tells him that he can't and tells Martin he doesn't want to see him anymore and kicks Martin out his office. You know what happens in 158 and 159, it's basically the same and Jon and Martin settle down at the safehouse.

I don't have much for season 5 but I really like the idea that Martin is still optimistic even after the change and that he reassures Jon that he's gonna find a way to fix it when it reality he has no clue and it terrified to think about what is going to happpen to them. They don't stay in the cabin that long soon after since Martin is very eager to go to the pannopticon and ya! Yknow how it goes.

Im so sorry I wrote a whole essay worth of shit but this au means alot to me and i get very excited when people ask me about it!!

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

Do you think in season 3, Hawk seeing Demetri interacting with other people caused him to get somewhat jealous. Before Hawk destroyed Demetri’s project, they zoomed in on Hawks face looking over at Demetri talking to Yaz and Moon and he looked jealous. Then after it’s like he lit up when he was talking with Demetri after destroying the project. I might be reading to much into it but the way the scene played out felt like jealously from Hawk!

Oh my, I’m getting so many questions in my inbox about the binary boys and I’m delighted! :D Keep them coming friends!!!

To answer your question, YES, I absolutely think Hawk was pretty jealous when he saw Demetri chatting with Moon and Yasmine. Now, of course the Straight^TM explanation we’re probably meant to think is that he was jealous Demetri was talking to his ex, but I think it’s deeper than that. I imagine for a long while, Eli was one of the ONLY people Demetri ever talked to and had friendly conversations with regularly, and vice versa. Being the antisocial “losers,” they probably didn’t have a lot besides each other social life-wise. Even when they befriend Miguel and some of the other Cobra Kais like Aisha, they’re still always doing it together.

And now, seeing Demetri holding his own and seamlessly making new friends WITHOUT Hawk...well, I imagine it’s completely foreign to him. And he doesn’t like it, even though Hawk’s got a bunch of his own “cool new friends” now. Because he remembers when he was all Demetri had, and now he’s gotta face up to the fact that Demetri doesn’t actually NEED him or his friendship to be happy, and deep down inside...well, I bet Hawk’s pretty hurt by that. Because hey, even growing up as the weird kid with the lip scar, at least ONE person always valued him and his company, even if that person was his equally lame and nerdy best friend. And now, lo and behold, the one person who wanted him around when no one else did could give less of a damn if he’s there or not, because Demetri doesn’t need Hawk to not get lonely anymore.

And, of course, there could also be a layer of bitterness directed at Yas and Moon specifically, because Hawk’s probably thinking “You only like him now that he’s cool and confident, but I was his friend back when he was a geeky, insecure mess no one wanted anything to do with.” Of course, being as deeply buried in his masculinity issues as he is, Hawk probably doesn’t think this on a conscious level. He’s probably just as fooled as the audience is into thinking he’s JUST upset about Moon. But I really doubt that’s all it is, considering a) Demetri’s never shown any romantic interest in Moon in particular and b) she IS still very much taken, as far as Hawk knows. He’s got no real reason to see Demetri as a threat to that relationship...or what’s left of it, anyways.

Even without the romantic subtext (which I’d definitely say IS there--you’re not crazy, don’t worry! I mean...I’m trash for this ship, should be obvious XD)...speaking from experience, seeing someone you were once extremely close friends with befriending new people and leaving you behind is incredibly painful, and a little off-puttingly strange, too. It often feels...wrong, like something you’ve always seen as a given is being uprooted and replaced with something completely foreign that doesn’t make any sense to you. Even when you’ve got beef with said old friend for whatever reason...well, sometimes said beef only really starts FEELING insurmountable when you get a glimpse of them leading a perfectly happy life without you. You realize for the first time they’re not going to come crawling back and groveling and apologizing so they don’t have to be alone. Maybe the project-destroying scene is when it dawns on Hawk how fully he’s lost Demetri, and the grief of it comes out all at once--at the most inconvenient time, no less. And, Hawk being Hawk, of course said grief manifests as anger and spite first and foremost (I mean...come on!!! Look how he reacts to losing his relationship with Moon!!! He’s angry with her, and wants to spite her later on by flirting with Piper) and so he destroys Demetri’s project.

And oh boy...factor in the romantic feelings I see Hawk as having for Demetri--or at least HAVING had, at some point in the past--and it’s just 10x as much of a FeelsBadMan moment for Hawk when he sees Demetri truly beginning to leave him behind. Hawk is a loyal dude (that’s why he took the “betrayal” of Cobra Kai via bad yelp review way too damn hard), and loyal people also tend to be a little possessive. Speaking, uh...speaking as a very loyal person myself who has had issues getting a liiiiiittle possessive of my friends in the past ^^; When you give undying loyalty, some part of you expects it in return, even if you don’t consciously admit it to yourself. And oh man...that’s amplified like 50x when you have a crush on someone, unfortunately. So the part of Hawk, no matter how repressed, that still sees Demetri as his #1, his best friend, the guy he may or may not secretly be in love with, just feels so...lost and abandoned at the prospect of Dem leaving him in the dust.

So naturally he smashes his lego project and makes everything objectively worse XD

WHOOPS this answer didn’t mean to be this long, but then I got captured by The Spirit of the Ramble XD

[chibinekochan]

How to become a Demon Ruler 109

Part:   01 I 02  I 03  I 04 I 05  I 06 I 07 I 08

GN. Reader insert

taglist:  @ayesha95    ;  @nomnomcupcakesworld ;  @fex-phoenix   ; @depressed-bixch ;   @kitsune-oji

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With a slight spring in my step, I head to dinner. 

"Good evening Diavolo and Barbatos." I happily greet them both. 

Barbatos gives me his signature smile. 

Diavolo lights up as soon as he sees me. "You look like you had a great time."

"Yeah, I was a bit nervous, but I think I made my first friend." I smile with some pride. 

"That's great to hear. To be honest I was a bit worried that you might feel lonely." Diavolo looks like a huge weight has been lifted from his shoulders. 

"I'm very happy for you. Even when I hope you choose your friends more carefully." Barbatos sighs just a bit. 

My guess is, that Mammon is a bit of a troublemaker. "There is no need to worry. I mean I have you and Barbatos. I only know you for a few days, but you are both very dear to me." It's a bit embarrassing to say out loud. 

Both seem equally surprised by my words. 

"It's the greatest honor to be regarded as your friend." Barbatos is the first to respond. It's a bit hard to tell his true thoughts, but he looks very happy to me. 

"I feel the same way. I hope we will become even closer. It's funny to think that it's not even been a week yet, but I can't even imagine the castle without your presence." Diavolo’s smile seems to glow even brighter than usual.

  I might need sunglasses at this point. 

Despite this, his words feel warm inside my chest. "I feel the same way. I think I never even realized how lonely my life truly was." 

I smile a bit sad but also happy at the same time. 

Then I feel a hand on my shoulder. "Worry not, your days alone are over." Barbatos’ words are unusually tender. My smile brightens at his words. 

"I hug him. Who could say no to him? 

Barbatos chuckles behind me. This must be a very strange sight, to be honest. 

I don't mind since hugging Diavolo feels much better than I expected. He is very warm, much like his big hands. 

I bet I could use my whole human strength, and he wouldn't even wince. He might even enjoy a good bear hug, maybe next time. 

I let go of Diavolo, who kind of looks like he wants more hugs but doesn't say a word. Instead, he just smiles at me. 

"Well now, where we are even you should finish today's work." Barbatos is back to smile as usual. Diavolo sighs. 

"Fine, I will go back to work." His shoulders slump.

  Barbatos shakes his head. 

"I know it's late, but I would recommend that you read a bit in the library. There is much to learn. Especially with our tight schedule." Barbatos talks gently to me. 

"You are probably right. I need some caffeine for that." I can only imagine the stack of books that Barbatos wants me to read. 

"I will make you some. Please go ahead." Barbatos still has some tasks to do, and I appreciate the offer. 

"Okay." So I head to the library and find a menacing stack of books. 

After some reading, I hear Barbatos arriving with my fuel. 

I give him a thankful look. "I have been waiting for this."

Barbatos chuckles. "If only everyone would be so excited about coffee."

I decide to take a small break and now that I'm alone with Barbatos it's the perfect opportunity to ask him about what Mammon told me earlier. 

"Do you want to join me for a cup?" I offer Barbatos the seat across from me. 

"I would be delighted." He sits down and pours himself a cup. 

I let him drink a sip and then get straight to the topic that's on my mind. "To be honest there is something that I want to ask you about." 

"Please go right ahead." He obviously doesn't mind. 

"The question I have is pretty personal, so you don't have to answer." I don't want him to be uncomfortable or reveal something that he shouldn't. 

Barbatos raises his eyebrows. "There is no need to worry about my comfort." 

I can only imagine what he thinks I'm about to ask. 

"I just heard something about Diavolo possibly dating Lucifer. I'm curious if that's true?" There is no talking around my question. 

Barbatos' eyes widen for a moment, and then he starts to smirk devilishly. "I can imagine who brought you to ask this, but I wonder why you would care about such a thing?"

For the first time since I know him, I believe that he is a demon. 

"I care for his well-being." I avoid his gaze. 

Barbatos seems to be very amused. "Is that so?" He gazes into my eyes, like doing so will reveal my true thoughts to him. "You don't need to worry about their relationship at all." He is very vague. 

"What do you mean by that?" I ask, feeling very frustrated. 

"Hmm, that is a good question." Barbatos is just teasing me now. I never thought he would do this to me. I puff my cheeks. 

This causes Barbatos to laugh. "I'm sorry master. They aren't dating at all. I'd say they are friends with much baggage." With the biggest grin, he flat out tells me the truth. 

"I see, so they have a long history. I guess it would be fair to ask them about that." I feel much better now knowing this. 

"Now I have to wonder if you might be interested in the young lord?" He looks at me with a pretty intense gaze. 

Now it's my turn to be surprised by a question. I almost spit my drink out. 

"Umm, well I mean… it's not like I don't like him, but I barely know him and want to make sure that I don't fall for someone that is already taken." I'd hate wasting my time and emotions on a pointless endeavor. 

A smile forms on Barbatos’ face. "That is very smart of you. I would support your future together." 

"As much as I appreciate your support, I haven't fallen for him yet and there might be other people that I'm possibly interested in." I feel the need to correct Barbatos on his assumptions. 

He looks once again surprised. "I hope you don't include Mammon on that list." He must disapprove of Mammon. 

"Of course not. I'm not known to fall easily for people." I shake my head. Not only that, but I have only seen Mammon once after all. 

Barbatos then thinks deeply. "But who else is there?" He doesn't realize the obvious answer. I have always seen him as a very smart, possibly cunning, man. Yet here he is completely oblivious.  

  I narrow my eyes in frustration. "Look in a mirror."

"Hmm? You couldn't possibly mean…" Barbatos looks utterly and completely lost. I wonder if he looked like this when I hugged him earlier.

I sigh deeply. "Believe it or not, but you are on that list." I can't even really call it a list with two people on it. 

Barbatos almost seems to gasp for air. "As flattering as this is, please reconsider. I'm no worthy match for someone of your standing."

"Just because I got forcefully adopted doesn't make me royalty, but I apologize for making you uncomfortable." I assume that he simply wants to shoot me gently down. 

"You are royalty in my opinion, and I appreciate your consideration. I simply have to think about what is best for your future. I'm merely a humble servant and as such completely unfitting to be your partner." Barbatos sounds completely logical. I'm unsure how to feel about him seeing me as royalty.

"I don't care what other people might think about whom I love or not. To me, it's only important that we are a great match. Of course, I understand that you might not be interested in me." This would only make sense. He might not even be interested in dating at all.

“You are certainly interesting, and I can see you fighting whoever doesn’t accept your relationship. I might be worried about nothing.” He gives me a small smile.

“Of course, besides if, I’m the demon ruler there is no way I'd let anyone tell me who I'm allowed to marry or not. If there is a rule against it, I will simply change it.” I shrug with a small giggle.

Barbatos gives me a chuckle. “I fear for anyone that would dare to oppose you.” His eyes meet mine again. It feels somehow very tender. “Don't forget that I will always be at your side no matter what you wish to accomplish.”

  I ponder the weight and meaning of these words. My heart beats faster for some reason.

  Before I can give him a proper response the library door opens with great force. 

I back a bit off, seeing that I somehow became quite close with Barbatos during our conversation. I hadn't even noticed until this moment. 

I then look towards the door and see it's Diavolo. He has his trademark smile and looks very energetic. At least until he notices that I'm relaxing with Barbatos. 

"Ah, here you are." He looks at Barbatos, who turned towards him. 

"Have you been looking for me?" Barbatos seems slightly surprised. 

"No, I was looking for my sibling. Since I finally managed to get everything done." Diavolo boasts without a hint of shame. 

"This is certainly an evening to rejoice." Barbatos seems genuinely pleased, but it's a pretty obvious snide remark. 

"Yes, it is! I hope I didn't interrupt anything." Diavolo doesn't seem to notice the snaky undertone and just casually sits down next to me. 

"No need to worry. We just were talking about their goals after becoming the demon ruler." Barbatos grins slightly. 

While not a lie it's not the truth either.

  "Really? Now that is something I'm very interested in." Diavolo is seriously interested. 

It makes me feel quite guilty. "I was only saying that I'd change rules if they would forbid me from loving whom I wish to love." 

Diavolo looks at me in awe. "So you have a potential prospect to marry? You certainly move quickly. Or is it a fellow human?" 

"No, there is no such person right now. I had nobody when I lived in the human realm. I was only talking hypothetically." I sigh, I can only wonder how Diavolo thinks of me. 

"Ahh, well, I'd abolish any rule that would inconvenience you anyway. So no need to worry about that." Somehow Diavolo looks relieved. 

"That is very kind of you. Even when it might be a bit reckless to say." I can picture him just changing rules on a whim without thinking about the consequences. 

"I have to agree on that." Barbatos calmly keeps drinking his tea. Without a worry about anything. I have no idea how he can do this. 

"You might be right, but if it's for you, I don't care." Diavolo shrugs.

  How can he just say things like this?

I look at him, feeling very baffled but also slightly amazed. 

I glance at Barbatos looking for some reaction. He just crooks his head and calmly smiles at me, as if to ask me what I want.

"I guess in that case I'll be careful what I ask of you." This seems to be the best solution. 

"That is wise of you. You should make sure to gain knowledge as well. So you can request everything you desire without causing havoc." Barbatos casually shoves the stack of books towards me. 

"I'd rather accomplish my goals by working hard, but you are right. I need more knowledge for that." I can't stand the idea of getting everything handed to me on a silver platter. 

"I'd love to hear more about these goals." Diavolo beams at me with great expecting eyes. 

Barbatos is also strangely focused on me. It's pretty embarrassing.

  "Well, my first goal is to survive the party and then my education." It's not a grand plan, but it's important. 

"That is a very reasonable goal. I'm sure you will be able to manage that. Of course, you still have some learning to do." Barbatos' taps on the books. He couldn't be more blatant even if he tried. 

"Indeed I have full confidence in your abilities." Diavolo has zero doubts, which is encouraging, but I also feel the weight of his trust. 

I guess I have no choice. "In that case, I will work hard." I look with dread at the books and then take one. 

Barbatos smiles brightly, surely a sign of his victory. 

"Do your best! I should go and check on the party preparations." Diavolo seems suddenly very motivated.

"You have a great effect on the young lord. I shall support him. Make sure you get plenty of rest." Barbatos beams with pride. 

"I will, thank you both." I smile at them, but internally I'm crying.

  So I study until my head is mush and then fall into a deep sleep.

  I dream of letters chasing me.