#i could elaborate but that would require making the words go

[straynoahide]

semantics come from linguistic convention, basically words mean what they do because we agree they do out of customary usage.

every word has an etymology, or origin, but semantic change is a constant of language. so etymology is insufficient to explain a word's meaning. the word "sake" (as in, "for god's sake!") meant "thing", now it doesn't. "vagina" meant sheath, now it doesn't.

depending on what demographic, community, you may have different conceptual systems for the same terms, even during the same period of time. nowadays, some are cross-cultural and cross-linguistic with the advent of multinational 'internet culture', so it is harder to keep track of these things.

"sentience v sapience v sophonce" actually is an interesting elaboration, a three-tiered distinction over the two-tiered distinction if you collapse any possible distinction between sapience/sophonce.

sophonce is a neologism with a greek root, although it is latinate, coined by a collaborative worldbuilding project called Orion's Arm, and "a project by nerds" doesn't quite translate it. it's a sci-fi fictional setting and their webpage is a bit old styled but it still includes thousands of articles expanding history, culture, 'galactography', etc, for tens of thousands of years into the future. it is a treasure trove of interesting ideas, some very original and philosophically relevant now with the development of AI.

many deal with a branch of philosophy called "noology", the study of the mind, thought, and knowledge.

they have developed terms like hypersophont too and tiers of possible levels of super-human intelligence based on what makes human intelligence different from animal intelligence, including the intuition that this is not like a linear ascension.

so the three-tiered distinction conveys something like this

sentient = could include literally invertebrates, sensory functions, but not necessarily able to form thoughts. subjective experience can go from vivid and detailed to very rudimentary (like a jelly that only "notices" light and dark)

sapient = intelligence, but not at the level of human intelligence. canids, felids, corvids. more importantly, primates, great apes. because there are currently important ethical questions that ponder what "personhood" and non-human personhood in particular is. is an ape that knows itself is itself and can do sign language* a person? maybe not, but they're not just sentient like a grasshopper is.

(*animals can sign, althought it's not really 'language' because animals can't really do grammar/syntax)

the current best estimate for that threshold, scientifically, is self-awareness btw. self-awareness is the ability to have, in one's mind, the notion of self. self-awareness is also called "autoscience". some non-human animals are able to do this.

sophonce or whatever word you wanna call it, would imply something more, something currently only humans possess. metacognition is not just self-awareness.

but metacognition takes it a step further, it implies associations around that, the ability to form knowledge about oneself, to turn oneself into a concept, and think about it.

this conversation would reveal someone is self-aware:

+hey you spilled your coffee -ah right, i see the spot, i hadn't noticed. i wondered why suddenly my knee felt hot. the fact they can associate an internal feeling (hot, cold) with the experience observed by someone else, as happening to them- that requires a concept of the self as the thing that experiences things. but only this conversation would reveal someone is metacognizant: +hey you spilled your coffee -oh fuck, i actually love coffee, now i have to get another one +do you really love coffee, though? -hm i guess you're right, i actually have a caffeine addiction, but i don't want to say it because i feel bad about it. only humans can form knowledge about the self and know things about the self, and have "recurrence" in thoughts. they aren't just thinking about coffee, they're thinking about what they're thinking about coffee (they're reflecting on the fact their euphemism reveals an avoidance to admit a problem).

that's what is so far human-only in terms of intelligence.

i am on my knees tears running down my face knuckles raw and bleeding and BEGGING people to learn the difference between sentient and sapient

[zhaleqjj]

i just realized that canonically hualian is the red string of fate and beefleaf is a dead knot

[blasphemecel]

How to Subtly Show Someone You're Interested

PAIRING: Michael Kaiser/Reader WORD COUNT: 2.4k TYPE: Humor, Bad flirting, bickering WARNINGS: huge Kaiser tw

#1 Eye contact

Kaiser has been acting strange.

Usually this would not be an observation you'd be making (as he acts weird all the time so it's not worthy of note), but today he's been so odd, it's starting to bug you even more than his default level of being annoying.

He keeps just… staring blankly. At you. You don't know what you did to deserve this horrible treatment — perhaps you did not grovel enough after accidentally butting into His Majesty’s shoulder, or breathed in his direction too hard without permission, or some other similar tragedy — but it's getting unsettling.

Well, honestly, it was creepy to begin with, but it's making your skin crawl more and more the longer it goes on. Like, what does he want? Are you going to be on the news soon? His eyes are blue and lifeless and evil like always, so you know he can't be up to anything good each time he burns your body to a crisp with his stoic serial killer gaze. It's even worse when he smirks at you while he does it, that's how you know the torture you'll endure at his hands will be slow and painful, and he's already delighting in his demented plans before putting them into action.

Kaiser attempts to maintain his stare down with you while he makes his way out of the training room and you stay behind putting away whatever you need to, observing him in confusion and fear. Though, of course, you would not admit to something as lowly as letting Kaiser intimidate you out loud (since you don't want to partake in an action that seems to give him a mental orgasmic feeling), at least to yourself, you can concede you're on edge.

… That is, until his dedication towards being a scrote proves detrimental even to him because he runs into the wall, hitting about half his face. It seems tormenting you is too distracting for a sick sadist like Kaiser. He palms at his skin, probably seething to himself while trying to seem cool and collected and totally not on the brink of shitting himself in anger on the outside, as if such a small thing as a solid wall could not faze him or even cause him pain.

You point and laugh at him. Kaiser pretends not to see you and walks out tall and proud like nothing happened. This will have to do as your revenge, for now.

#2 Initiate conversation

“Did you have a nice weekend?” asks Kaiser.

“It's Tuesday,” you reply, once again confused. Why is he talking to you, does he have nothing better to do.

“Right,” he says in a casual tone, like he didn't just ask you an irrelevant dumbass question. “The weather is nice.”

You ignore that one, but you can't help wondering if something is wrong with him and if this is an obscure call for help. Blackmail from a drooling fan perhaps? After all, it's unlike him to say anything so boring and ordinary, and you don't imagine he would make small talk with you unless it's a complicated code to signal that his life is in danger.

“What restaurant would you recommend?” Kaiser tries again.

“What?”

There's an uncomfortable silence during which you're just looking at each other, you perplexed and him expressionless, the previous guise of pleasantries and fake sweet smile wiped off. It is possibly even more uncomfortable than anything else that has unfolded between you two in the past. Then Kaiser says, “You know, I think you're an ingrate.”

“What?!”

“You’re not appreciative enough of my efforts.”

“For what?!”

Kaiser scoffs, averse to elaborating due to humiliation (either because of his apparent failure or because it's plain embarrassing to state his intentions when you don't seem receptive to them or because being outright on the matter requires him to express himself, which is in nature disgusting). Then you watch while he walks away from you in a moody fit.

Well, at least if he has the energy to act temperamental, that must mean he's not in any shittier spirits than usual. It is way less unnerving than his earlier civility, for one.

#3 Compliment them

Kaiser has no respect for personal space. Or more like he only deems his need for such important and disregards everyone else's. You know this.

But you can't lie in good conscience that he's gotten this close to you before, examining you, leaning in way too close. Close enough that you feel Ness planning your murder from across the field. Close enough to warrant a harassment complaint.

You assume Kaiser must be looking for miniscule flaws to fake laugh at like a missing eyelash or the fact that you have pores, but instead of doing what you predicted, after a long while of making you almost throw up from nerves — what's with this guy and staring at you like a microbe under a telescope so much? — he says, “You have beautiful sclera.”

???

You bristle at the sound of the strange thing he said. Unperturbed by your visibility negative reaction, Kaiser continues,

“And I love the way you look at me, like you want to kill me. It gives me a thrill.”

What's wrong with this guy? you think to yourself.

“Your bone structure can almost rival mine-”

“Kaiser, stop talking nonsense and go… back to doing something else somewhere away from me.”

“Hmph.” He backs off to a more socially appropriate distance, crossing his arms. “I see you still haven't fixed your attitude.”

“Me? I need to fix my attitude?! When you're the one acting like a depraved person?”

“Wow, if you think that's what I'm doing, you must not understand anything about the world at all,” he says in a condescending tone, smirking at you with played up amusement.

“You have some nerve! Kaiser, go away before I take advantage of my position and put rat poison in your water bottle. It'd suit you to go out that way.”

“You're so obsessed with me.”

After that declaration, he whips around to make a dramatic and majestic exit, with a deliberate swat of his hair to your face. Maybe you'll be spitting out gross blue strands after this. You fume to yourself.

#4 Light touches

Once again, Kaiser is plaguing you. Today's method of inflicting trauma seems to involve more gratuitous touching than usual.

He awkwardly drags his hand over your shoulder.

You stare at him as if this is the most scandalous offense you've been on the receiving end of. Maybe it's not, but he's been walking on your nerves all day with other such inept attempts at caresses. “Did you just wipe something on my sleeve?”

“What?” he asks in a flat tone. “No. Are you dumb?”

Your expression doesn't show anything other than incredulity. Certainly not the fluster and admiration Kaiser is hoping for.

You then go right back to ignoring him like he is dust. This is outrageous, he's going to be sick. Kaiser takes fate into his hands and embraces you stiffly from behind (once again showing his lack of etiquette).

Startled, you ask, “Are you gonna put me in an octopus hold?”

“No? Do you always have to assume I'm going to do something bad to you?”

“Well, it's not like you ever do anything good.”

Kaiser lets go of you even though he doesn't want to — truly a moment of his character development you're witnessing —, his arms dropping limply by his sides while he frowns at you like a kicked kitty. Exquisite manipulation tactic, however, you're not moved by the display at all.

He says, “I still think you need to fix your attitude.”

You roll your eyes and let him have his little moment with his snide remark. An immediate retort hasn't come to mind after all, and you'd rather play it off as disregarding him than admit to the shameful lack of a comeback. It's not your fault his incomprehensible behavior leaves you speechless, anyway.

#5 Be there for them

Kaiser decides to skip this one as it's even more vile than when he lowered himself enough to the point he tried to hug you.

#6 Use humor

Kaiser stands in front of you, trying to think of something funny to say, which isn't an activity he engages in often (as the comedy of his existence is often unintentional or manifests in the form of being a bitch for no reason and antagonizing people unprovoked). During this process, you're once more forced to endure the weight of his unrelenting, vacant stare.

“I have a controversial football opinion,” says Kaiser, finally.

“As usual.”

“The ball is sentient and it hates getting kicked around like that.”

You tilt your head, not understanding why Michael Kaiser would say something so… silly? “Well, I'm sure you take some delight in imagining that,” you say in an unsure voice, not knowing how else to reply.

Kaiser smirks at you in an attempt to shrug off his latest failure and feign casualness. Then he tries again because his spirit is as tenacious as his gawping. “You should always make sure to distinguish between ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘I apologize’ at a funeral.”

“Why? Do you speak from experience? Is that a little slip up from when you attended the funeral of one of all those people you killed?”

“No. I think if I killed someone, I'd be the type to facetiously say ‘rest in peace,’ just to piss them off in the afterlife.”

“I can imagine you doing that. Good for you I guess.”

Kaiser snickers to himself — maybe because he's enjoying imagining all his enemies dead — and plays with his fingers in an almost nervous manner, which makes you question if you're perhaps hallucinating. He ponders if he's funny or not.

#7 Text them

(04:55 AM) Michael Kaiser: [5 image attachments]

(06:32 AM) You: why are you sending me shirtless mirror pics lol

(06:46 AM) Michael Kaiser: Wrong person

(06:50 AM) You: did you mean to send that to ness

(07:02 AM) Michael Kaiser: No

(07:05 AM) Michael Kaiser: ???

(07:43 AM) You: well you only talk to me and him so if it's not for us who else could it be for

(07:44 AM) You: lol don't tell me you did that to seem sought after haha

(07:48 AM) Michael Kaiser: Let's stop talking for a little while.

#8 Give them attention

Kaiser gives you plenty of attention, and he doesn't even make you do tricks for it. Like for example right now, when he's poking you in the ribs while you're trying to fill out something unfinished on the tablet during your break.

You slap his hand away. “Kaiser. What.”

He moves onto poking your neck instead, forcing you to wiggle away from him as he continues his antics despite your dodging.

“What do you want?!”

“I just don't want you to feel neglected by me,” he says in a tone he probably believes is suave.

“I don't.”

“You're trying to seem brave, but your eyes give you away.”

“You're crazy,” you say, not even in shock or embarrassment, but rather a very apparent disorientation. “If anything I've been overdosing on you lately.”

“There’s never enough of me. You don't need to pretend just to humble me. It's not cute nor clever.”

“Kaiser, quit it before I cut off your finger and poke you with it instead.”

To your surprise, Kaiser stops. You watch him warily for a few seconds before feeling safe enough to turn around and try doing your work again.

Kaiser pokes you on the sides.

#9 Playful teasing

“You look like shit today,” greets Kaiser with a smirk, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “Did they let the clown academy off early today?”

“Kaiser, you're so immature.” You shrug him off. Usually you'd allow the contact, granted he's not being rude or creepy, but he's done the former a nanosecond into the conversation, so you're not going to stand for it.

“I assume you're stupid or uptight enough to take me seriously. That's always fun.”

“Trust me, you're the last person in the world I'd take seriously.”

“No, but really, you're quite unencumbered by the standards of beauty today.”

“So I'm ugly and stupid? Awesome, thank you so much.”

His traitorous hand which had grabbed at your shoulder earlier moves lower around your waist instead, pulling you closer. At his actions, you squint your eyes and look at him as if he is a dirty wet sock. “Don't worry, I'd still take you though.”

This horrendous thing he just uttered makes you gape in shock. Then it morphs into disgust, and you smack him on the arm and retch at him.

#10 Mention being single

You expect something horrific to happen this time when Kaiser approaches you, but instead, out of the blue, unprovoked, nobody asked or moved — as most things are with him — he announces, “By the way, I'm single.”

You raise an eyebrow at him, not sure what to do with this information. “Yeah, that figures.”

“What do you mean? Tons of people want me, but I don't want them back. That's why I'm available, that's all.”

“Don't explain yourself to me, I don't care,” you say flippantly, crossing your arms and shifting your weight to one leg.

“Well, you should.”

“Sure, Mr. ‘Sorry Wrong Chat.’” You snort.

Kaiser upturns his nose and glares at you. “You’re mischaracterizing me and presenting that whole situation wrong. For one, I didn't say sorry.” Then he scoots closer to you, grinning without smiling with his eyes whatsoever. “Anyway, I'll forgive you. As long as you remember the main point, which is that I'm single.”

“I know, dipshit.”

“Wow, can't you rub your little brain cells together, the whole two of them, and understand what I've been getting at?” Kaiser snaps, frustrated that the fruits of his incompetent labor aren't ready for reaping yet.

“It's not my fault you can't say whatever you have to say properly,” you say, delivering your line in a pointed tone so that he can grasp the implication you're making this time.

Kaiser blinks with the small frown still on his face, a remnant of his earlier scowling. Then realization sets in and his lips form a thin line instead. His cheeks color slightly.

You're fucking with him on purpose.

___

Some slop I wrote on my phone on vacation in between drinking and sweltering in my own gooch in the sun. Enjoy or don't

[awkward-walking-potato]

“I couldn’t find a costume, so I just decided to go as your [partner/bf/gf].” that's a Remy line if i've ever heard one. Remy x reader, please?

Trick or Treat

The hallways of the X-Mansion buzzed with excitement. Decorations were scattered all around—ghosts hung from the ceiling, pumpkins lined the steps, and eerie green lighting bathed everything in a festive, spooky glow. The team had been planning the Halloween party for weeks, and you—new to the X-Men—had been eagerly anticipating your first real opportunity to bond with everyone.

You’d received the invitation the night before, scribbled in Rogue’s bold handwriting: "Halloween Party: Must Be in Costume or No Entry!"The requirement had made you nervous. You didn’t want to show up without a costume and risk feeling left out, but you also didn’t want to overdo it and look ridiculous in front of your new teammates.

After pacing back and forth for a bit, you finally settled on something cute but simple: a rabbit costume. It wasn’t anything too elaborate—just soft bunny ears, a white cotton tail, and a cozy dress that you hoped would strike the perfect balance between fun and low-key.

As you walked through the mansion’s corridors, your nerves built with each step. You smoothed out your dress and adjusted the bunny ears, making sure they were perfectly in place. With one final deep breath, you headed for the room where the party was being held, faint laughter and music spilling out into the hallway.

However, before you reached the door, a figure caught your eye.

There, leaning casually against the wall, was none other than Remy LeBeau—Gambit himself. You’d heard the stories about him, his charm and his flirtatious nature, but you hadn’t interacted with him much since you joined the team. He was dressed in his usual attire: a dark leather trench coat, fingerless gloves, and his signature red eyes glowing mischievously beneath his tousled hair. No costume.

You raised an eyebrow, coming to a stop just a few feet away from him. “No costume, Gambit? I thought the invite said ‘costume or no entry.’”

He looked up with a grin that could melt steel, his gaze sweeping over your rabbit outfit with obvious approval. He stood up straight and slowly approached you, taking his time to make sure you felt the full weight of his attention.

“Chère,” he said, his Cajun accent dripping with charm, “I couldn’t find a costume in time.”

Your brow furrowed. “So… you’re not going in?”

He leaned in slightly, his lips curling into a playful smirk. “Actually, I decided t’ go as somethin’ easy.”

You blinked in confusion. “What’s that?”

Remy’s eyes locked onto yours, and with a wink, he replied smoothly, “Your boyfriend.”

The air between you seemed to crackle with heat at his words, and your cheeks instantly flushed as you stared at him, your heartbeat picking up. “M-my what?” you stammered, your brain taking a second to catch up with what he was implying.

“My costume, ma belle,” he repeated, stepping even closer. His voice dropped to a teasing whisper as he looked into your eyes. “Couldn’t think of anything better than pretendin’ t’ be the lucky guy who gets t’ be with a cute li’l bunny like you.”

Your mind went blank for a second, but you quickly regained your composure, though your face remained warm with embarrassment—and maybe a little bit of excitement. “That’s… that’s not exactly how costumes work,” you managed, crossing your arms in mock indignation, though you couldn’t hide the amused smile tugging at your lips.

Remy chuckled softly, clearly enjoying your reaction. “Oh, I think it works just fine,” he teased, taking one of your hands and lifting it to his lips. He pressed a soft, lingering kiss to the back of your hand, his eyes never leaving yours. “Besides, I think we make a pretty good pair, don’t you?”

The gesture sent butterflies fluttering in your stomach, and despite your best efforts, you couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across your face. “You really are shameless, you know that?”

“Only when it’s worth it,” Remy replied, his voice low and smooth. He let go of your hand, but not before brushing his thumb lightly over your knuckles in a way that made your pulse race.

Just then, Rogue appeared at the door, her hands on her hips and an amused smirk on her face as she took in the scene. “Remy, y’all best be gettin’ a costume or you ain’t getting in, sugar,” she called out teasingly. “Rules are rules.”

Remy shot Rogue a knowing grin, then turned back to you, leaning in close enough that you could feel the warmth of his breath against your ear. “Guess I better find a real costume then,” he murmured. “But, I’ll be back for that dance with my little bunny. Don’t hop away, *chère.*”

Before you could respond, he winked at you again and sauntered off, his trench coat swaying as he disappeared down the hallway, leaving you flustered and amused in equal measure.

You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding and turned back toward the party, shaking your head with a smile. Remy LeBeau was definitely trouble—trouble with a grin and a dangerously charming accent. And somehow, you couldn’t wait to see what kind of trouble he stirred up next.

As you stepped into the party, your mind replayed his words over and over, wondering just how many more "costumes" Remy had in store for you.

[roosterforme]

Covering the Classics Part 7 | Bob Floyd x OC

Summary: Just when Anna starts to feel settled, a simple cookout at her friend's house turns everything upside down. Her jealousy shines through, and there's nothing she can do to try to take it back.

Warnings: Fluff, angst, adult language, masturbation, eventually 18+

Length: 4800 words

Pairing: Robert "Bob" Floyd x Female OC (this story is part of the Beer Boy/Sugar and Jake/Jessica universe)

Covering the Classics masterlist. Check my masterlist for more! Thank you to @mak-32 for the beautiful banner!

Things with Bob felt like they shifted back to normal again, and Anna was thankful for that. Every book she let him borrow was returned with a note folded up inside. Some of them were short and simple. When he handed back Love Letters of Great Men, the note simply said The dog eared pages are going to make me cry. But some of them were longer and more elaborate.

She was running a little late to meet him at the usual coffee shop, worried he would already be there. He seemed to end up paying for her drink every single time, which was honestly really sweet of him, but she felt like such a nuisance. When she walked inside, he was there, at a table with two steaming mugs in front of him and his nose buried in a book. In one of Anna's books. In her copy of Wuthering Heights.

Her whole body felt too warm as she thought about how much she would love to have Bob read every single one of the hundreds of books she owned. Maybe even read some parts out loud in that deep, soothing voice. She would love to hear his take on each plot and watch him blush as he called her the expert and asked for her opinions. She would love to take the book from his hands and pull him down into bed with her.

But she couldn't do that. They were just friends. So instead, she dropped down into the empty seat across from him and said, "Hi, Bob," with a smile she hoped wasn't as sad as she felt.

"Anna." Her name sounded like golden perfection when he said it, and she shivered. "This book... I can't stop reading it. I read it twice already," he said with a little laugh. "How in the world do you always know exactly what I'm going to like?"

Because she felt undeniably drawn to him and his preferences and everything about him.

"Because I'm a professional."

He laughed a little more as his pretty lake-blue eyes followed her cup as she brought it up to her lips. When the ceramic touched her, he looked away as his cheeks grew pink. He pushed the book across the table, and when she reached for it, he said, "Uh, just read that note later, okay?"

When she saw the edge of white paper sticking out from the worn pages, she said, "Sure, Bob."

He cleared his throat a little awkwardly. "Did you hear about the change of venue for tomorrow?"

Anna ducked her head. "Yeah, the girls told me about it at lunch yesterday. A cookout? Bradley wants to show off his new grill?"

Bob nodded and said, "Could be a nice change from the Hard Deck for once."

While he wasn't wrong, Anna hated that she still barely had enough money to make ends meet. San Diego was expensive, and when she asked Advanced Calculus what she could bring with her to their house to contribute to the meal, her friend said to bring hot dog and hamburger buns. Anna was already trying to figure out how to scrape together the ten dollars that would be required when Jessica said she already bought some along with chips and pretzels. When she didn't quite meet Anna's eyes, she knew for a fact that Jessica had figured her out.

"Yeah. I suppose," Anna told Bob. But at least at the Hard Deck, Penny didn't usually even charge her for the three dollar ginger ales. And if she did, one of the guys just put it on their tab like it was nothing. When she showed up empty handed to the cookout, she was going to feel awful that Jessica had covered for her. 

"You want another coffee?" Bob asked, standing with his own mug, but Anna shook her head. She couldn't let him pay for another thing. Perhaps deleting multi millionaire Dev Borah's phone number wasn't her best move. Not that she would ever take advantage of someone for their money. Not after what Kevin did to her.

"No. But thank you. I actually can't stay very long today."

Bob nodded before saying, "No worries. I have dinner plans with Suzanne before Mickey picks me up for D&D anyway."

And there it was once again. The reminder that Bob didn't think about that kiss nearly as much as she did. "I hope you have a great time."

------------------------

It was late on Saturday night, and he should have been in bed, but Bob had his computer out. He reasoned that he could sleep in as late as he wanted tomorrow before heading to pick up the burgers Bradley asked him to bring for the cookout. He could stay up as long as it took for him to finish this poem and finally post it on PoetsAmongUs after looking at it for weeks.

If anyone knew he was writing about Anna, he would probably die on the spot. But nobody in his life knew he wrote anything in his free time, let alone the fact that he wrote poetry. And this poem was getting close to needing a 'mature' label if he was going to post it online.

"What are you doing?" he asked himself softly. Somehow he believed that writing about her specifically would cleanse him of these thoughts, but now he knew he was wrong. He proofread and posted his poem anyway while his skin prickled with need. He'd never experienced the kind of love his friends had, and in spite of all of her hesitations, he could imagine it happening with Anna. If anything, he liked that she seemed cautious and contemplative, he just wished she wasn't still that way toward him. 

She made him want to keep leaving her notes in the books he borrowed from her, but she also made him feel like an idiot for wanting to do that. It was maddening. He needed to sleep, but he was too warm, imagining Anna once again in place of his faceless lover while he touched himself. He almost couldn't wait until the day when someone else would take her place in his mind, even if it meant settling.

The next day, he drove his old pickup toward the coast with the burgers and a six pack of ginger ale in tow. The Spanish revival style house that Bradley purchased before he and his wife made things official again was cute with desert landscaping, but she was the one who really made it a home. There was art hanging on the walls in every room, including a panoramic watercolor of the scenery of Virginia. The front bedroom had been turned into her home office, and for some reason, she had Bradley's fraternity paddle hanging in there. The house seemed more lived in now, and Bob knew Bradley was much happier for it.

"Hey, thanks man," Bradley told him, taking the bag of burgers when he got there. He was wearing his hideous Grateful Dead shirt and holding two cans of beer on one hand, but he still managed to give Bob a quick hug. "Sugar's out back, setting up some snacks and just generally looking hot. You want a beer?"

Bob held up the ginger ales in response and said, "Thanks, but I'll just have one of these for now." The last thing he wanted was a hangover like he had after their New Year's Eve party.

"Hi!" Jessica said as she and Jake walked inside, and she made a beeline right for Bob. "Have you given any more thought to how I should paint my barbarian?"

He just smiled as she started to push him through the kitchen toward the back door. "We just played yesterday. I didn't know you'd still be in the mood to talk about your ridiculous D&D character."

"Please," she practically whined. "You know how sensitive my barbarian is."

Bob snorted; truly he never would have expected he and she would have had so much in common, but even Jessica couldn't keep his attention once he saw who Bradley's wife was talking to. Anna had some freckles on her thighs. Her cutoff denim shorts went high enough up her legs that he was treated to the sight of freckles everywhere. And that wasn't all. Not even close. The deep "V" of her shirt revealed that there was a pretty good chance the freckles even trailed down inside her bra.

He wasn't going to survive the cookout if he had to look at her all afternoon. Her red hair was clipped up on top of her head with some sort of claw-shaped thing, and her skin was just everywhere. Her neck and her legs and the swell of her breasts. Her fingernails were burgundy again, just like the first day he saw her. She hadn't even noticed him yet, which was terrible, because if she had, he would have looked away by now. Instead he was given ample opportunity to memorize the way her legs looked as she shifted her weight from one foot to the other, shuffling her beat up sneakers a bit along the patio.

"Oh," Jessica whispered, squeezing his bicep gently when he stopped responding to her. "Yeah, that'll do it." Her tone sounded slightly sympathetic, and it made Bob so self conscious. "Let's go say hi."

He shook his head jerkily and muttered, "In a second." Anna was currently laughing, head thrown back in delight, and Bob got the briefest peek at the strip of skin above her shorts and her bellybutton, and his brain actually stopped functioning. When she tipped her head forward again, an overjoyed smile still on her lips, she met his gaze. His brain jump started again as her teeth sank into her bottom lip, and he took a step in her direction before he could reconsider.

"Hey, Bob." She sounded a little breathless as she said his name while Bradley's wife smirked at the two of them. But he and Anna were just friends, and he needed to remember that.

"Anna," he replied softly, slipping his hands into his jeans pockets. His palms were sweaty, and he knew he was blushing. He'd never make it out of here alive. Not when she was looking at him like that. 

She smiled and said, "I came up with a few, slightly more obscure book recommendations for you. I was thinking maybe we could go back to the bookstore and look for some of them that I don't currently own? I might be fun to-"

Bob was already about to agree with whatever she said, because it sounded exactly perfect to him, then he heard someone screeching his name.

"Bob!" There was a brunette flash streaking across the small backyard, and then Natasha Trace was in his arms. She was giggling next to his ear where she kissed his cheek three times in a row, knocking his glasses askew.

"I didn't know you were coming home today," he said in surprise.

"I didn't tell anyone except Bradley. Did I surprise you?" she asked.

"That's an understatement, Nat," he replied, hugging her tighter when she refused to let go. "I missed you."

Her familiar laughter was comforting as she said, "You have no idea how much I hate flying with anyone other than you." When she finally started to pull away from him, she added, "Now we can pick up where we left off before my deployment."

-----------------------------

Anna couldn't believe how incredible her friend's house was. It was huge and beautiful, and she had a yard. A yard! In California! There was colorful art on the walls, which appeared to be a collection of things that she and Bradley enjoyed. Her office was something Anna could only dream about, and the kitchen was bigger than her whole apartment.

After a tour of the interior, she stood on the patio in the autumn sunlight in a pair of shorts, something she would have never been able to do in New Jersey. Every day seemed to get better than the last, assuming she could keep the intrusive thoughts about Kevin away. And also assuming she could figure out what she was supposed to do about Bob and the growing collection of feelings she seemed to have for him.

"You have to hear what happened in my Differential Equations lecture on Friday afternoon," her friend was saying as they stood near the new grill that would soon be the centerpiece of the afternoon. "You won't even believe it."

Anna listened for a minute to the wild story, bursting into laughter when she learned how her friend thought she was going to have to call the fire department while she was teaching. Then she saw him. Bob was here with his tidy hair and his adorable glasses and his big hands, and like always her brain filled up with the beautiful poetry she loved so much. Somehow it seemed to go together with him. Those stunning words matched the way he made her feel.

She had to bite her lip in an attempt to calm herself down. "Hey, Bob," she managed to say as his cheeks flushed pink.

"Anna."

Oh, she was a mess. She thought about him way too frequently, even taking the time to compile the titles of some books she had read and loved, convincing herself he might like some of them too. "I came up with a few, slightly more obscure book recommendations for you. I was thinking maybe we could go back to the bookstore and look for some of them that I don't currently own? I might be fun to-"

But she stopped mid sentence when she heard some excited chatter behind Bob, and then a woman came running out through the back door. A beautiful woman. Calling his name. Jumping into his arms. Anna was treated to the sight of the woman's lips brushing against Bob's cheek while he held onto her like he was just reunited with the only person he ever cared about. She had to watch as this other woman ran her fingers gently along his skin in exactly the way Anna fantasized about. And when she looked around, nobody seemed concerned by this turn of events, rather they all acted like it was perfectly normal that Bob and this woman were whispering intimately to each other.

Then Anna heard her say, "Now we can pick up where we left off before my deployment."

Oh. Well. There was a sour taste in her mouth as she took a step backwards as the rest of the group greeted this mystery woman. Anna was going to have to have words with Advanced Calculus and Advanced Physics after this. Maybe they tried to set her up with Bob, because they didn't like this other woman? That idea vaporized as soon as she saw Jessica embrace her with a bright smile on her face.

Anna felt like her chest was growing tighter by the second, and then Jessica started to pull the pretty brunette toward her. "You have to come meet the newest faculty member from the English department! Dr. Anna Webber."

The woman looked her up and down with dark, appraising eyes and a little smirk set firmly on her lips. Then she stuck out her right hand and said, "I'm Natasha Trace."

The last thing Anna wanted to do right now was shake hands, but Jessica was looking at her with concern, probably wondering why she was just standing there. "It's a pleasure," Anna said with as much conviction as she could muster, shaking hands as briefly as she could.

"You teach at San Diego State too?" Natasha asked as her smirk bloomed into a bigger smile. When Anna nodded, she laughed and added, "What the hell do they put in the water at that school?"

Jessica was beaming now as she said, "Anna gives book recommendations to Bob all the time."

"Really? Is that so?" Natasha asked, still eyeing Anna like a predator would their prey, when Bob appeared with two cans of ginger ale. He gave one to Natasha and then tried to hand the other one to Anna as Natasha said, "I actually read a phenomenal book last month, Bob. I'll write down the title for you."

He kind of smiled, still holding out the other can toward Anna who felt like she was on the verge of screaming. "No. Thank you," she told him, taking a few steps away as she clocked the hurt expression on his face. "I don't want any."

The uncomfortable feeling was overtaking Anna's whole body now when Natasha leaned a little closer to Bob and softly muttered, "Let me guess... you have a little crush? This happened in my absence?"

Anna turned and went inside, searching for the bathroom she'd seen on the house tour. That woman was mocking her. Anna didn't want to hear any more of that conversation, because it was making her skin crawl. And worse still, she was finally able to identify this feeling as she closed and locked the door and leaned on the sink vanity.

Jealousy. 

She was more jealous of this petite brunette who seemed to think Bob's personal space was hers for the taking than she ever was about Kevin and Alyssa. She was beside herself at the idea of another woman giving Bob book recommendations and making fun of his stupid little crush on her.

This was exactly why she should have never let herself have feelings. When she looked in the mirror, she saw tears in her eyes. "Shit," she whispered. She didn't have a car, so she couldn't just discreetly leave. Plus she'd been looking forward to eating something other than one of her sad sandwiches for days.

The jealousy gave way to anger as she wiped her eyes with a tissue and dropped it in the trash can. Her new friends invited her here, and she was going to stay. She wasn't going to let her feelings for Bob Floyd dictate her mood or what she felt she was allowed to do. She wasn't going to let another man run her life like that ever again.

With her head held high, she walked back outside, making it a point to avoid Bob and Natasha at all costs. She willingly had a thirty minute conversation with Jake and Mickey about the Marvel Cinematic Universe as an excuse to keep her distance. Then she and Bradley discussed the extensive musical catalogue of the Grateful Dead while she slowly sipped a beer to try to take the edge off. Then he turned on the grill, and the smell of food cooking had her excited enough that it was becoming easier and easier to ignore Bob.

When she accidentally looked his way, he was already eyeing her with a confused expression. She could pretend all day long that she didn't care what he thought and that she wasn't jealous at all. She could be so stubborn about this. At least all they had between them was that one awkward, fumbled kiss in his truck. It wasn't like she'd slept with him before he ditched her for the much better looking Natasha.

She was still doing a fine job of ignoring both of them when Bradley announced that dinner was ready. Anna took a plate of food and scooted all the way to the end of the rectangular patio table, snagging the spot across from Jessica. She was willing to talk about anything right now, even her friend's physics curriculum that she could barely comprehend, but then Bob was right next to her.

"Mind if I sit here?" he asked cautiously, setting his plate next to hers. Anna just shrugged, and then she was enveloped in his clean scent as he eased himself down in the seat with his knee hitting her thigh. She quickly crossed her legs before scooting her chair a few inches to the side away from his. "Are you okay?"

Anna almost laughed as Natasha found a spot on the other side of the table. "I'm just fine," she said before taking a huge bite of her burger and avoiding looking at either of them.

"Right," Bob whispered, frowning down toward his plate as she gave him side eye. "I just... feel like I did something to upset you."

Anna shook her head, and when she was done chewing the delicious food, she said, "Not at all. You're free to make the decisions you want to make. And I'm free to keep my books to myself since you've got other ones now."

Bob looked at her and asked, "What's that supposed to mean?" 

But Anna was well on her way to starting a conversation with Jessica that could probably last for hours. She ignored him as she asked, "Hey, Jess, what's up with that physics professor who just started wearing a toupee?"

"Dr. Leeland!" she screeched before launching into an animated conversation on the topic of her colleague's hair piece just as expected.

------------------------

Bob was so confused. He had been about to jump at the chance to hang out at the bookstore in North Park with Anna when Natasha arrived. At that point, he honestly thought this was going to be the best day he'd had in a while. Anna seemed happy to see him, and one of his best friends was finally home from deployment. But as soon as that thought entered his mind, Anna started acting like she wanted nothing to do with him. So much so that she asked Jess about some guy's fake hair? Bob sat there and listened to the conversation while he ate, trying to interject, but Anna just wasn't having it. She had even rejected his ginger ale.

What the hell did he do wrong? All he wanted to do was talk to her about books and look at her freckles. She was sitting right next to him, but he may as well have been on Jupiter with the way she seemed convinced that he wasn't even there at all.

As everyone started to finish eating, Bob washed his food down with the rest of his ginger ale. Maybe he should just head home early. He'd be spending all week at work with Nat, so it wasn't like he was going to miss out on much there. And being around Anna when she wasn't even looking at him made him feel like an idiot for secretly writing poems about her. He sat at the table alone for an extra minute with his head cradled in his hands, then he took his trash inside the house.

Of course Anna was the only other person in the kitchen, helpfully washing the grilling utensils and other things Bradley left in the sink. She glanced his way briefly before continuing with her task, and Bob headed for the trash can. He had the perfect view of the freckles on the backs of her thighs, but he didn't feel like he should be looking now. He stood quietly for a few seconds before deciding that he'd give this one last try before heading out.

"Anna," he said just loud enough that he knew she could hear him over the running water. "Can we talk? I just feel like I did something to upset you? When you started to invite me to the bookstore, I was going to say yes. Obviously I'd love to go with-"

She looked at him over her shoulder, and he went silent at her glare. "Why don't you just go with Natasha instead?"

His brow furrowed in confusion. "That's not the kind of thing she and I usually do together."

"Oh?" she asked, her voice dripping with something that made Bob's skin tingle with goosebumps. "Does she usually recommend books while you're out to dinner? Or do you take her to see her favorite movies?" 

She turned off the water and faced him without bothering to dry her hands. His lips parted as he watched the furious looking blush that crept along her chest, up her neck, and to her cheeks. 

"I don't really do those things with her either," he said slowly, trying to puzzle his way through this. She sounded almost jealous of Nat, but that couldn't be. That didn't make any sense at all. Anna made it clear she didn't want to be with him.

"Well, you're free to do whatever you want, Bob," she said with a shrug, chin held high. "This is why we're just friends. You've already got plenty of women to choose from, like Suzanne and Natasha, and I'm not about to get caught up in another attractive man who seems too good to be true."

She started to duck past him, but Bob blocked her path. "Whoa, whoa! No, you've got it all wrong." She doubled back the other way, but he stepped to the side until she bumped into him. "Suzanne is my elderly neighbor. And Natasha and I are friends," he said quickly, and he was rewarded with Anna's brown eyes snapping up to meet his. "I've known her for years. She's the pilot I usually fly with."

Anna took one stumbling step backwards toward the sink. Her teeth sank into her lip like earlier before she whispered, "Oh." She swallowed hard, drawing Bob's gaze back to the freckles on her neck as her blush grew deeper. "So you're not... into her?"

His voice sounded deep even to his own ears as he promised, "Not even slightly. Not like I'm into you."

The kitchen went so silent that Bob could hear laughter filtering from the patio through the open door, and Anna's expression softened as she took a tiny step forward. Then another one. Then one more before she was launching herself into his arms. Bob could feel her damp hands in his hair as their lips met, and it was nothing like the way they kissed in his truck. She wasn't tentative, and he didn't pull away as she kissed him harder. This time her body was pressed to his, and she moaned softly when he let his hands settle on her hips.

Anna coaxed him impossibly closer with her fingers in his hair and on the back of his neck, and soon he had her pinned against the edge of the counter. He could feel denim rubbing against denim as she parted her lips and wiggled slowly against him. When Bob swiped his tongue along her bottom lip, Anna let him taste her before her lips drifted along to his neck.

"Fuck," he grunted, squeezing her hips in his hands as his index finger met the soft skin of her lower back. She was sucking gently on the spot just to the left of his Adam's apple, and there was no way she couldn't feel how hard he was getting for her right now.

Those burgundy fingernails were scraping gently along his scalp as he rolled his hips one time against her body. When Anna licked his neck, he forced himself to ask the question that was fluttering around the peripheral of his aroused brain. "Are you going to tell me this is another mistake? Like that night in my truck?"

Anna pulled her lips away from his pulse point long enough to whisper, "It wasn't even a mistake last time. I just couldn't help myself."

Then Bob kissed her lips until she was clinging to him with her back arched against the counter and her hips held tightly in his hands. When he could tell someone was coming inside, he pulled himself away, panting as she tried to chase him for more. He could see the questioning look on her face as he stepped aside just before Mickey and Jake walked inside, arguing about who ate the last hot dog.

Anna turned back toward the sink as she blushed, and Bob was aching to kiss her again. Dying to confirm that she wasn't going to write him off again. He cleared his throat and asked, "Will you let me drive you home later?"

Bob heard her soft laugh and whispered, "Yes." Then with a smile, he took the last can of ginger ale from the refrigerator and set it on the counter next to her. She looked up at him, eyes filled with need as he excused himself back out to the patio where he started to count down the minutes until he could suggest it was late enough to leave.

---------------------------

Anna, you are living the dream, baby! Let him love you the way he wants to! And once again, in Natasha we trust. Thanks @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 8

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[saphronethaleph]

The Convenience of Independent Subsystems

R2-D2 beeped, indignantly.

It was something he was quite good at.

If he was being fair, of course, he knew that nobody had actually intended for this to happen. Anakin – or Vader, he’d called himself now, but designations could change – had obviously intended to get back in the fighter and fly back to wherever the Emperor wanted him to go.

And Obi-Wan had clearly been quite distraught about the situation, so he simply hadn’t thought through how Anakin had arrived in the first place. While Padme was entirely incapacitated, so there wasn’t much hope of a good outcome there.

But still. R2 would have expected 3P0 to remember him, and that was a cause for indignant beeping.

He scanned the available frequencies, trying to work out where exactly he should go. Neither 3P0 nor Obi-Wan had been kind enough to notice him, so of course they hadn’t bothered to tell him where to go either, and while there was a hyperspace ring floating up there for him to use it would be pointless to take off without some idea of where to go.

R2 spun his dome around, as he pondered.

Maybe Naboo? Naboo was where he’d started out, and Jar Jar Binks was funny. That was definitely an option.

Or perhaps travelling to Tatooine would be better. C-3P0 was from Tatooine, and a bit of creative mayhem might just solve a few problems.

He’d have a much better idea of where to go if he knew where Padme, Obi-Wan and C-3P0 had gone, but he’d gone through that recently… though, then again, maybe he should take up flying around and doing deeds. Occasionally even good ones.

No, that wasn’t going to work. He was cross-linked into the starfighter systems, to the extent he could certainly operate all the individual controls, but most people weren’t happy with a droid as independent as he was. Especially after all the wars so far.

It would definitely require some thought.

Then something pinged up on his short range scanners, with a very interesting call sign.

“Luke,” Padme declared. “And this one is… Leia.”

She sighed. “I… thank you for being here, Obi-Wan.”

“You’re talking like you’re going to die,” Obi-Wan protested. “Don’t do that.”

“Ani was having dreams, about me dying,” Padme murmured.

“She’s very tired,” the Polis Massa medical droid reported. “She should make a recovery, though I will want to have stern words with her previous OB/GYN.”

Padme looked just guilty enough that Obi-Wan assumed there hadn’t been an OB/GYN, which was probably part of the problem.

Then C-3P0 ran in.

“Mistress Padme!” he said. “Jedi Master Obi-Wan, sir! I have picked up a message from R2-D2!”

“You have?” Obi-Wan asked. “Where… oh.”

His face fell. “He got left on Mustafar, didn’t he? Anakin must have got there somehow.”

“Quite correct, sir,” C-3P0 said. “At least, that he is still near Mustafar, though he has been using the hyperspace ring to broadcast to me. However, the main bulk of his message is relating to a different matter entirely.”

The protocol droid looked uncertain. “Would you be so kind as to elaborate what ‘scratch one Emperor’ means?”

Obi-Wan boggled for a moment.

“...can you confirm that?” he asked.

“I can certainly ask,” C-3P0 replied, holding up a comlink, then twittered into it in binary.

R2 beeped a reply.

“It seems a shuttle broadcasting the code Imperial One flew over to where Master Anakin was,” C-3P0 declared. “So R2 shot it down with Master Anakin’s fighter. It crashed into the lava and exploded.”

Obi-Wan glanced at Padme, who’d passed out after her stressful day.

“...well,” he said. “I think we may need to get R2-D2 a medal. Possibly another medal.”

He paused.

“Maybe a seat on the Jedi Council…”

[wooahaes]

party hats & kitty cats

pairing: non-idol!lee know x fem!reader

genre: fluff. established relationship au.

warnings: food. one-off line about having kids in the future. discussion of expanding the family via adopting a new cat.

word count: 1.3k~

daisy's notes: oh to adopt a cat w lino....

Minho shifted next to you, causing you to lift your head off of his shoulder. “Hold on,” he said, voice soft as could be so as to not disturb you (or, more likely, the cats asleep around you). “Keep your head held up.”

Which was what prompted you to open your eyes right as a string fell snugly against the underside of your chin. Minho pushed it back so it would sit more comfortably, continuing to manipulate the party hat on your head until it looked right. That was when you realized he was wearing one, too. 

“What?” 

You’d been drifting off a little too much despite the carnage going on the screen (the powers of a bad horror movie, for sure), halfway to dreamland when he moved. The first time, you hadn’t had to move too much—assuming that Minho had just been reaching for his drink. The second time, you thought he’d been putting it back. And now he was just watching you with this playful look in his eyes, proud at his own silly little joke. 

“Pretty,” he mused aloud. Then he leaned forward, pressing a quick kiss against your lips before getting up for real this time. The action earned a curious ‘mrrp?’ from Doongie, who had been sleeping at your feet until now, and Minho looked at him. “Doong-doong-ah, just stay there.”

Doongie promptly hopped down off of the couch to follow him instead, cat DNA requiring that he not follow orders from anyone but himself. You just relaxed against the couch, reaching a hand up to pet Soonie where he’d curled up to sleep. He raised his head lazily, purring once you began to scratch underneath his chin. Dori had popped his head up from where he’d been batting around a little mouse toy, watching Minho carefully as he moved about the kitchen with Doongie at his heels. You just found yourself smiling at the scene. Sometimes you joked that Minho fell in love with you once you met his cats and began to adore them almost as much as he does, but sometimes you truly think this relationship wouldn’t have lasted this long if you weren’t all-in on moving in with him and the three cats. You turned your attention back to Soonie for barely a second before you heard the click of a lighter.

And then a minute later, Minho began to sing to you. He made his way over, holding a small cake that was enough for the two of you. Doongie followed after him as he came back to you, all too curious and needing to know exactly what was going on in his home without him knowing ahead of time. Minho carefully lowered himself onto the couch next to you, holding up the cake for you.

“Did you make this?” You asked once he stopped singing.

He shook his head. “I was going to,” he said. “But I decided to focus on cooking dinner instead.” 

Good, you thought to yourself. The dinner Minho had cooked for you was a little elaborate. The idea of him making you a cake and dinner, especially when the cake was decorated a little extravagantly, would have been too much. He’d pouted at you when you went the extra mile on his birthday considering how much you’d been working lately, gently chastising you when you were left exhausted after everything.

“I don’t need anything that special,” he’d told you while the two of you were laying in bed, his arms wrapped around you. “Your health is more important to me.”

You turned a little to look at him over your shoulder. “You didn’t like it…?”

“I loved it,” he kissed the side of your shoulder. “I always love the things you do for me. But…” His fingers grazed against the skin, exposed from where your shirt has ridden up. “I don’t want you to sacrifice your wellbeing for me. Okay?”

You had made him promise to do the same, something he’d easily done and sealed with a soft kiss before snuggling in for the night. Now he sat before you, the candlelight illuminating his face more than the television screen did. 

“Make a wish already,” he’d lightly teased. “You can stare at me later.”

With a roll of your eyes, you turned your attention to the lit candles. For a moment, you debated on what to wish for before settling on something achievable, hopefully. You shut your eyes, blowing out the candles before the smell of smoke immediately greeted you. When you opened your eyes, Minho had reached for one of the forks he’d casually left on the coffee table earlier. You’d assumed at the time that he simply brought too many and would return it to its drawer later, but of course he was a step ahead of you. 

“So?” He pushed the fork into the cake, apparently intent on feeding you the first bite before he’d pass the fork to you. He held it up. “What did you wish for?”

“I thought telling you meant it wouldn’t come true?” You teased before closing your lips around the fork, sweet vanilla buttercream bursting over your taste buds as you enjoyed the first bite of your cake. This had to be the same bakery you ordered his birthday cake from last year. Their vanilla buttercream had a certain quality to it that you could never put your finger on (Felix would know, though: he’d complimented it at Minho’s party). 

“Is it something I can do?” He asked. When you played up your debate before nodding, he rolled his eyes, scooping up another bite of cake for you. “Then tell me.” 

“I was thinking…” You went to take the fork, only for Minho to pull it away from you. A hostage situation, apparently. Unfair. “We could maybe expand the family a little?”

He gave you the most confused look in response. “You said you didn’t want to have kids until later on—”

“Not kids,” you said. “Maybe… We could get another kitten?” 

Minho nodded along to the question, thinking it over. He pushed the fork back toward you, purposefully not letting go. You decided to oblige once more as you ate the bite of cake. “We’d have to see about fostering first,” he said, already figuring out the reality of adopting a new kitten when you already had three rambunctious cats around. “Find a space that the others can’t get to while we introduce them to each other…” 

Finally victorious in stealing the fork from him, you pushed it through the cake and held out a bite to him. The two of you had shared enough at this point anyway. “So we’ll look into it?”

He nodded. “I think we could. It’ll mean more work looking after them, but I think we could handle it.” He looked at Soonie, reaching up to scratch him between the ears. “Although if the cats don’t respond well, I don’t know if we could go through with it…” He hummed to himself for a moment, thinking harder about it. “Maybe a girl? It doesn’t matter either way, but maybe it’d be nice to have a girl cat around. We’d have to find one spayed or get her spayed when she’s older—”

“Minho.” 

He immediately turned back to look at you, realizing how lost he’d grown in kitten adoption thoughts. His gaze flickered back to the fork in front of him, and he smiled at you for a minute before leaning forward to accept the bite. “Thank you,” he said after swallowing. “Sorry.” 

“Don’t be,” you giggled. “It’s cute that you care so much.” 

He lowered the cake he’d been balancing on one hand, carefully leaning over it so that he could kiss you. When he drew back, his eyes were all twinkly, so obviously giddy over the prospect of a new cat. Or maybe that was just the way Minho looked when he looked at you. His friends told you once that Minho adored you completely, and it was evident when they saw the way he looked at you.

“Happy birthday,” he said for the final time that night. “I love you so much.”

taglist: @twancingyunhao @weird-bookworm @bangchansbae @jinnie-ret @cheesemonky

[uglypastels]

Ridlington Park | II | Eddie Munson regency!au

Dear reader, my sincerest apologies for the delay in the upcoming chapter. It seems that there had been some technical problems at the printer's shop and some terrible time management on this writer's part. Before we resume this tale of love, however, I would also like to thank all who have read the first chapter and shared their thoughts on it with not only me but others. Know that your support does not go unnoticed, and I cherish it with all my heart.

Word Count: 8.1k

Do be warned, Dear Reader, for this story in its entirety may contain:

female!reader. slow burn. forbidden romance. jealousy. pining. smut. alcohol consumption. swearing. OC family. family disputes. horses. talks of arranged marriage. historical facts as well as trivial inaccuracies.

Due to the adult nature of the story, this author also kindly but sternly requires underage readers to pursue other works. 

The Ridlington Park Collection | Correspondence | Join the Taglist - Read Chapter 1 here -

Chapter Two: A Time for Scandal

“At a private ball, no lady will refuse an introduction to a gentleman. It is an insult to her hostess, implying that her guests are not gentlemen. It is optional with the lady whether to continue to drop the acquaintance after the ball is over, but for that evening, however disagreeable, etiquette requires her to accept him for one dance, if she is disengaged, and her hostess requests it.” - The Ladies' Book of Etiquette, 1873

The Royal family's return to London brings a new life to the city each year as its elite congregates fervently for all possible occasions. The notable number of balls, soirees, and other social gatherings mark a particularly eventful point in the year that no eager lady or gentleman would want to miss. And whilst the matchmakings occupy most thoughts, this motivation somewhat overshadows the mere social aspect of the season. The parties offer the perfect meeting ground for all ton members, as they can indulge in all the niceties the hosts provide. Whether it be the music, magnificent foods and drinks, or simply pleasant conversation. To miss a social event, especially for a debutante such as yourself, Dear Reader, is to miss an opportunity to present oneself to her suitors and the entire town. It is to miss the happenings that drive the whole court forward. 

Thus, you were obligated to accept every single invitation presented to you and your family. And as spectacular as they all were, weariness settled deep in your bones with each new event. No matter how lavish, it all began to blur together into one repetitive pattern.

Each time, you would find yourself atop a grand staircase, your family trailing behind, as the earlier arrivals looked up in awe and envy. With a shaky breath and a tremble to the hand holding your skirt, you descended the steps onto the dancefloor, where a wonderful yet pesky gentleman awaited to greet you. If fortune were in their favour, they would even gather in a pack, making you the bearer of choice who to greet first, whose offer for refreshment to accept, and whose signature to claim on your dance card in which order. Meanwhile, your mother gawked in a nearby distance with a smile stretching for miles, already planning what cakes to ask the chef about for the next morning’s calling hour. 

The lights around you sparkled wonderfully, and you could not deny that Lord and Lady Parsnell had outdone themselves for their annual ball. Theirs was a particularly beautiful ballroom, with windows covering the entirety of the large west wall. It overlooked the gardens illuminated with lanterns of all colours, and the room was in an everlasting golden glow. The music played from the far right corner, where the musicians were located on their platform, all dressed in elaborate costumes and wigs, completely painted in bronze to imitate the likeness of statues and as the bypassing guests were gawking up at them, you felt a twinge of a connection between yourself and the talent across the room.

‘Would you care to dance, miss?’ one of the gentlemen asked, and as you could not find a single polite response in your entire vocabulary, you opted for a kind smile as you extended your hand in agreement. 

As with all the others, this was making itself out to be a long and dreadful evening.

On your way to the centre of the floor to join all the other couples, you caught a glimpse of your oldest brother, Nicholas. To no one’s surprise, he had found himself in deep conversation with a young lady dressed in a gorgeous sea-blue dress, a fan to match fluttering purposefully over her bosom. For the entirety of the dance, you kept your eyes on the two of them. No matter how lacking intellectual stimulation your brother’s endeavours may be, they forever remained more fascinating than anything your dance partner had to offer. You only turned your attention to the man at the harsh sound of his laugh. It appeared he had been entertaining himself with his jokes for the duration of the waltz. This and how he slurred you around the room, practically dragging your limbs behind him, made you doubt you were very needed at that moment. 

Finally, the music slowed, and you were released from Lord Bramley's harsh hold on your hands. You bid him farewell with a respectable curtsy and walked away before the man could utter another word, let alone request another dance. As you walked off the floor, a most horrid apparition revealed itself in the corner of your eye in the shape of another available man in conversation with your mama. Too occupied by the gentleman, she had not noticed you to have finished your dance, and so you saw the opportunity to make yourself scarce in the crowd, at least for the moment.

‘You cannot hide forever.’ A hum more irritating than a critter tickled at your ear as your second brother, Christopher, appeared by your side at the confectionery table. 

‘I certainly can try, can I not?’ you grinned, tasting the icing on a strawberry cake. 

‘Because we know how well that turned out for you the last time,’ he reminded you. All you could do was grin at him maliciously as you thought back to the day when— 

❀❀❀

Your mother had lovingly retrieved you from the stables as you had attempted to escape one of your family’s countless matchmaking attempts. And while the man you had met, Mr Steve Harrington, had turned out to be quite pleasant, you still struggled to relive the embarrassment of being hunted down by your mother through the garden. Not to mention the judgment of your siblings the very next day at breakfast as you learned they had been told all of what had occurred the day prior.

You walked into the room with an appetite that disappeared as soon as you saw the amusement on your family’s faces and heard the hushed tones with which they spoke as you found your seat. Perhaps if they had been more straightforward, you could have endured it, but they all remained silent as they watched you take your pick of the food, portioning it onto your plate at your own pace. Only as you took your first bite did the first words erupt, nearly leading you to choke. 

‘Your lunch with Harrington went well, I take it?’ Nicholas asked, much to his amusement.

‘What makes you say that?’ you asked, answering with your own question, with no intention of looking your family in the eye as you did. 

‘Mother has just caught us up with the events of yesterday afternoon,’ your brother stated, his enthusiasm in stark contrast to your discomfort at the moment. 

‘I cannot see how there was much to speak of.’ You tore off another piece of the toast with your teeth. ‘It was dreadful.’

‘Dreadful, you say,’ Christopher snickered, barging into the conversation, as unwelcome as the rest, ‘it is not the word I would use, given what we have heard.’

‘Please enlighten me, then, brother? What do you deem an appropriate summary given what I can only assume was mother’s thoroughly accurate recount of what happened?’ You could imagine that she had embellished aspects of the day to fit her narrative; one that most definitely would not suit your future objectives in any way. Truly, since when had the breakfast meal also become the time for your entire family to torture you? It seemed that any moment you all found yourselves in one place, it was deemed the designated time for inquiries regarding your prospects. 

‘I had only told them that you seemed to have rather enjoyed yourself with Mr Harrington,' your mother said nonchalantly as if she had not just struck you with a verbal mallet over the head. 

‘Mother!’ you said with a frozen-in-shock expression, but your mother only blinked slowly in bewilderment. You blinked slowly as well. ‘How could you?’

‘Is that an offence to say these days?’ She replied, chuckling, underestimating the damage she had caused with that simple phrase. You had rather enjoyed yourself with Mr Harrington. The string of simple words opened the floodgates that until then kept back the unwanted commentary of your siblings, in particular, the vaunting of Nicholas, who had pridefully acclaimed the matchmaking between you and Mr Harrington to himself and would not let anyone forget that for the rest of the meal or the hours, even days, after—

❀❀❀

But you were happy to put all this far behind you. No matter how keen your siblings or parents were to return to that day, you were not one to dwell in the past. You looked forward. More specifically, right ahead of you, where there seemed to be a clear exit route in the form of a pair of large oaken doors—like a gleaming, delicious yet forbidden fruit tormenting you from a distance. You shook the silly thought out of your mind, returning your attention to Christopher, who indulged himself in a puff pastry delicacy.

‘Can you blame me, brother, for acting out after having endured an entire day of the most monotonous, unspirited, and, dare I say, upright dull conversation a man has to offer?’ You watched Christopher pick up a glass of wine, quickly grabbing it out of his hands to consume the drink yourself, leaving him, in turn, in a slightly shocked state of confusion.  

He blinked slowly and sighed. ‘You do not have to explain yourself to me, and I hope you do recognise that,’ he said as he watched you finish the last drops of his wine. ‘I am merely suggesting that if you know what is good for you, you will open yourself up to these opportunities, as by defying, you will only end up causing yourself more harm.’

Now it was your turn to heave out a heavy and tired breath. You put the glass down, perhaps a bit too harshly, as the thud against the table spurred on a few looks from the ladies around you, but you were too occupied with your brother’s words. He was right, of course, on both accounts. Of all your siblings, Christopher was most like yourself, never entirely understanding the need for marriage. Of course, as a male and a second-born son, he had no such obligation or needs to fulfil. It was perfectly well for him to remain a bachelor for as long as he pleased, not to mention pursue any interests he might have.

Meanwhile, all of these “opportunities” you had that he spoke of were in matters of either matchmaking or to enhance your appeal for such exact situations. Yes, you had a more than fortunate education. You spoke various languages, understood maths and geography, could play the pianoforte prettily, perform any dance in your sleep, and occupy yourself with perfectly fine needlework. But it was disheartening, as at the end of the day, all these accomplishments were meant as nothing more than to advertise yourself to men who could not care one bit for any of it as long as your face and body were adequate for their tastes.

But you also knew, through your assumptions and fair warnings from others, that if you were not to find a husband yourself, someone else would do so for you, and a last resort comes to be just that for apparent reasons but ones you would rather not familiarise yourself with. 

‘Do not tell me I have managed actually to silence you and put a stop to your wit.’ Christopher chuckled. 

‘You wish,’ you responded, possibly proving his point. Meanwhile, another song began to play as more couples took to the floor. Your eyes immediately examined the room for any threats of men reaching for your hand for a dance, particularly a certain Mr Bridgerton, who you read to have claimed a spot on your dance card. 

‘Rules are rules,’ Christopher sang teasingly as he saw you check the card tied around your wrist. ‘You cannot deny a gentleman’s—’ but he never entirely managed to finish his sentence as he watched you tug at the ribbon connecting you to the list of men waiting for a dance. The material tightened, most likely leaving a nasty red line across your arm as you pulled and pulled until—snap—you broke free. The piece of paper fell to the floor. 

‘Oh my!’ You covered your mouth in faux-wide-eyed perplexity as you kicked the discarded card behind a large potted plant, far into the forgotten shadows of the room. ‘How can I remember the gentlemen’s names whom I have promised a dance now?’

Against his better judgement, your brother cracked a smile, ‘I can tell you now, you will regret doing that.’

‘Somehow, I rather doubt that,’ you twirled your wrist, enjoying how freeing it felt not to be tied up any longer. 

‘The second that mother finds you without that silly little thing around your hand, you will sing a different tune, sister.’ He finally took another glass of wine, cheering you on, ‘And do not come crying to me about it when that happens.’ The large chug he took was anything but galant. Still, it was his final act before he bid you farewell and left you at the confectionary table to fend for yourself. You had not expected the doubt to settle as quickly as it did, but perhaps the lack of a big brother-shaped guard dog by your side made you feel abnormally self-conscious. For a moment, you considered running after Christopher, but from what you could see through the crowd, he had quickly crossed the room and was already entertaining his friends—each of them a gentleman you were attempting to ignore. 

Things only seemed to be taking a turn for the worse when you picked up a foreign accent which deafened all others around you. 

Harrington. 

You cursed to yourself, quickly turning around to face the tables. What on earth was this man doing here? The Parsnell family was ever the charitable one, but never in the matters of their parties. You could not imagine what would make them want to invite some foreign merchant’s son. 

Well, the answer was simple. It was the same as any other question regarding Steve Harrington and his actions towards you. It must have been your eldest brother’s doing, of course. It was all Nicholas from the very beginning, and he would not let you forget it ever since that breakfast the day after you met with the American—-

❀❀❀

‘I knew it from the moment I met the good man; you would make a perfect pair.’ He said as he sat across from you in the drawing room, feet hanging over the couch’s armrest. 

‘And how, pray tell, could you predict this exactly?’ You rolled your eyes. While most often, it was Nicholas who attempted to drown out your voice through the words on a page, it was your turn that day to try to ignore his rambling.

‘As much as you would like to think better of yourself,’ Nicholas leaned forward, more than happy to keep talking about the subject, mainly if it covered a topic that could humble you: ‘the truth is that you are as shallow as the rest of us, sister, not to mention as easy to read on the subject of these matters as everyone else.’ 

‘Even if I had such biases, I would not share them with you,’ you scoffed, flipping an unread page. 

‘There was no need for that explicitly, I have conducted my research and come to the right conclusions, have I not?’ It was impossible to wipe the smug smile off his face; you knew that by now, and yet…

‘If you do not shut your mouth this instant, I swear, I will throw this book at you,’ you threatened, putting the book you had occupied yourself with over your head. 

‘You are only this upset because you know I am right.’ Nicholas gloated, but you were happy to see him tense up in the shoulders as you began aiming the book in his direction. Not that you would actually throw it… just yet. A lady can do heinous things if pushed far enough, and you felt yourself standing on the edge. 

‘I know that you are being completely maddening.’ You dropped the book in your lap. ‘And must be mad if you think I am in love with this man. He was a pleasant conversation partner, that is all. I assume mother has been deprived of social engagements for far too long, if she thinks me laughing at this man’s jests is enough for there to be an engagement already.’ Harrington’s jokes had been funny, you had to admit, but it must have been a joke from the powers above that sent the following footman into the room in that instance, announcing a gift had been left for you at the door. 

Before you could say anything, Nicholas requested it to be brought into the room. From the irrepressible smirk on his face, he seemed to have an edge of knowledge on you on what was about to be presented through that door in the following moments.

And indeed, not much later, the man returned holding an oversized vase filled with flowers—a bouquet of colours combined into a lovely smell overpowering your senses. 

You said nothing as you walked up to the table where the heavy gift was set, but your lips could not help but part in surprise. You noticed the paper sticking out from between the buds and gently pulled it out. 

See these flowers as a token of my appreciation for thy hospitality and benignity. 

Sincerest greetings, 

S.H. 

You groaned out, reading the words. ‘You are despicable, brother!’ Nicholas, who had been reading along with you from behind your shoulder, quickly stepped aside as you turned his way, ‘You set him up to do this.’ the accusation came out of your mouth like venom. 

‘I did no such thing.’ But his smile remained easy to read. Although… was it a remnant of his earlier pride, or did he see the flowers as yet another gratification for his unbearable attitude? 

‘But you did! It has your grimy hands written all over it.’ You flicked the paper in his face. How many times had you seen your brother write notes to the ladies he attempted to court or send out servants to pick flowers from the garden? ‘Did you scheme this whole thing out on the boat on your way home?’ You could already see it all so clearly. The two of them standing in a corner of the ship, your brother acting like a snake charmer, teaching Harrington everything for him to win you over. It all left a rather sour taste in your mouth.

‘I promise you, I had nothing to do with this.’ He glanced at the flowers, ‘but you must admit that the man has a great taste.’

‘Yes, I am sure his servant has great botanical knowledge. Do you think me to be so dense that I would expect the man to do this all by himself?’

‘You cannot make me believe you were not impressed for even a moment?’ Nicholas argued. You glared at him, eyes formed into narrow poisonous slits, but in the end, all you could emanate from your mouth was another angry groan. Feeling hopeless, you let your body guide you back to the chaise across the drawing room. The smell of the flowers seemed to linger on despite your effort to distance yourself.

‘So you are to say that you have no feelings for Harrington? What so ever?’ Nicholas trotted behind you, taking the seat next to you.

‘No more than I have for you at the moment,’ you said with gritted teeth.

‘Ah, so you do love him!’

‘Ugh,’ you exclaimed—

❀❀❀

 Much as you did when you suddenly felt a presence behind you calling your name. To compose yourself in the crowd and avoid further embarrassment for anyone, you quickly turned back around to face the man approaching you. However, by doing so, your sudden movement caused a chain reaction in the glass you had just reached for, spilling all its content on your person.

‘Mr Harrington!’ You gasped. However, any possible enthusiasm you might have felt for the man’s presence was overtaken by the shock as your bodice soaked in the cold beverage, knowing that the material of your dress was gaining more damage with each passing second. Of course, a handful of people nearby stopped what they were doing to gawk at what surely must be a rather embarrassing moment between a young lady and a suitor she was attempting to seduce. 

‘Miss Byrnwick,’  Harrington jumped into action, ‘let me find you a maid.’ Within another second, he had disappeared into the crowd, leaving you to cry in shame at your brother’s side—your brother, Nicholas, who did not seem one ounce affected by your dramatics.

‘Have you no shame?’ he asked between tight lips, leaning in your direction to avoid the eager ears of the nearby audience.

‘Oh, brother, I have only begun.’ You smiled with a whisper before taking a step back, and another, until your back was met with the soft texture of the cake placed directly behind you. How ridiculous of you to have forgotten. 

You cried out.

‘There there, sister,’ Nicholas failed to find a single sincere vocal cord from what it seemed. ‘Let us get you cleaned up.’ He reached for your arm, smiling at a hoard of ladies standing a few feet away, but you quickly pulled away.

‘Do not be ridiculous, my dress is in ruins!’ You did anything but shout. Anyone paying attention, and by this point, this had included the majority of the gathering, would be no fool to expect your eyes to be on the verge of tears as you attempted to cover yourself up to no avail. Why, after this fiasco, no one could blame you for making a swift departure out of the ballroom.

That is nearly nobody, for your mother caught you just as you were about to exit. 

‘Dearest, what has happened to your dress?’ Her face showed an awkward smile filled with concern, but you knew that not that deep inside, she was raging with fury as she took in your state.

‘It was an accident, mama.’ You sniffed, wiping at your dry cheeks. ‘Now, will you excuse me? I would like to go home, please.’ 

In this instance, with more and more people collecting around you to look at and their whispered words making their rounds around the room faster than the country dance performed just moments ago, there was very little your mother could do. After a final look around the room in hopes of finding a suitable reason for you to stay, yet failing to do so, she had no choice but to let you go.

‘Let me at least find one of your brothers to escort you,’ your mother sighed in defeat.

‘I am perfectly capable of going home by myself, mother.’ You resumed taking steps toward the doors, their appeal practically pulling at your feet eagerly. ‘And besides, I will not be alone. I will have the carriage driver for company.’ This did not make your mother any more confident in the situation, but both your brothers also appeared to have vanished into thin air, and the gossip was only growing more potent the longer you stood there in your stained ensemble.

‘Alright then,’ Mother gave in, ‘just… be careful.’

‘Of course.’ You reached for her hand and squeezed it tightly. ‘Thank you.’ With this farewell, you ran out of the room as politely as it was possible in good society. There had not been many occasions in which you had visited Lord Parsnell’s estate, so it took a moment before you found the main entrance. 

‘Everything alright, miss?’ a footman standing by the door called out, clearly having noticed your distress. 

‘Perfectly well,’ you caught your breath. I simply require my carriage.’ To this, the man nodded and disappeared into a corridor to call for your transport. The music seeped through the main hallway from across the other side of the large house. Mindlessly, you let your body move in sync with the violins. You took small but correct steps over the marble flooring until the man returned, announcing your carriage would be ready momentarily.

‘I shall wait outside,’ you explained, and just like that, the grand doors opened to reveal the late night. Crickets chirped across the fields nearby as the moon and stars illuminated the gravel at the entrance. With nobody around and the cool night air pleasing to your heated skin, you took a deep breath and let your legs give in.

‘Danced too hard, miss?’ a familiar voice called over the sound of horses’ hooves and carriage wheels rolling. ‘You look like you have just walked through a storm.’

‘Balls have that effect on a lady.’

‘They sure do,’ Eddie chuckled, for a reason unclear to you.

‘Did I say something funny?’

‘No, it’s nothing,’ he shook his head, changing the subject, ‘Will your family be long?’

‘They shall take the second carriage. I will be making my return alone.’ With your numbers, one carriage would have called for a relatively tight, possibly hazardous fit. So you and your brothers had taken the larger coach—steered by your family’s coachmen—whilst your parents drove in the smaller hansom that Mr Munson had kindly offered to operate for the other regular driver had coincidentally fallen ill. 

Thus, now that you were returning alone, you had the smaller carriage all to yourself. 

‘No chaperone?’ Eddie asked, somewhat apprehensively.

‘I have you, have I not?’ you said as you hiked up your dress to climb aboard. The footman that had so generously opened the coach door looked reasonably stunned as, instead, you took your seat next to Eddie in the driver’s seat. He looked at you with just as much surprise. ‘I’d like to enjoy the mid-night air, if that is alright with you,’ you explained.

‘You won’t hear me complain, miss,’ he smiled, pulling the reigns and setting the horses into motion. As you drove off, you dared to take a peak behind you. The footman remained confused in his place, trying to comprehend what exactly he had just witnessed and whether or not to call it a scandal or not. But, in your modest opinion, you could not find anything scandalous in a young lady who was seeking comfort from one of her family’s employees and one you had, above all, learned to trust a great deal in the last weeks.

As you know, you have always found comfort in the gardens surrounding your house, yet after your first meeting with Mr Munson, you found yourself seeking refuge on the grounds even more often than before. Especially as the arguments regarding your prospects grew more heated and the tensions between you and your family became more tiresome by the day. It became an almost daily routine for someone to shout out obscenities and slam a door in protest, and nearly every fight ended in you needing to catch a breath amongst the flora. And more often than not, you wandered around until you found yourself at the stables. But unlike in your childhood when it was the horses’ company you were looking for, it was now a person’s attention you were hoping to catch—

❀❀❀

You certainly had no intentions of returning to the stables the first time you did so. Initially, you had planned to visit the orangery, but the gardeners were currently occupying it, and in your need for solitude, it did not feel like the right place to be, which is why you surprised yourself as you called out into the empty aisle. 

‘Hello?’

No response came. Nobody was around except the stallions and mares, who were comfortably munching away at their hay, unaware of anything happening outside the building. 

You stood in front of the entrance, looking ahead of you, unsure of what to do next and still not entirely certain why you had come here in the first place. You listened to the soft, unbothered noises of the horses and fiddled with the fabric of your dress for a moment or two until the silence became unbearable. It could not have been longer than a minute that you stood there, but to you, it felt like an eternity, and with each passing second and no plan on what to do next, you only felt sillier and sillier. You had to leave here before someone caught you standing and waiting like a statue. And as you turned around, you slammed into the arms of the one person you had hoped would not catch you this way. 

‘We must stop meeting this way,’ Eddie smiled, but the grin quickly disappeared as he caught a glimpse of your expression. ‘Everything alright, ma’am?’ 

‘Yes, of course,’ you wiped the folds in your dress nervously. Something about his gaze made it impossible for you to return it. ‘Why do you ask?’

‘You look as if you’d just seen a ghost.’ 

‘Well, you did just scare me half to death, Mr Munson.’ It was true. You felt your heart leap up into your throat as your bodies collided. ‘You are far too stealthy, you know.’ 

‘Apologies. I have learned to be quiet around the horses so as not to startle them—’ 

‘Which has the exact opposite effect on humans, does it not? ' you said, pushing the corners of your mouth into a smile. 

‘It appears so, miss.’ He returned the gesture. 

It took far too long for you to realise that, according to the general rules of conversation, you were expected to say something next; however, before you could remedy that misstep, Eddie spoke up once more. 

‘Are you sure you’re alright?’ 

‘Yes,’ you shook your head, ‘perfectly so. Is the weather not lovely?’ You looked up, just anywhere but at him, to see the cloudless sky. ‘I er— I thought of taking Barley Sugar out for a ride.’ Suddenly, your intentions of finding yourself in front of the stableman were perfectly clear. 

‘Of course, ma’am. Which horse will your chaperone be taking?’ The question stumped you, which must have been clear to the man looking so intently at you, for he quickly asked: ‘You do have a chaperone, do you not?’ 

‘I do not. I am more than capable of riding the horse on my own, thank you. I have been doing so since I was 5 years old.’ 

Eddie hovered over his words briefly. ‘I did not intend to question your skills, ma’am; it is only that it had been made clear to me upon my employment that you are required to have someone accompany you when you leave the residence—for the horse’s safety, if anything.’ He quickly added, sensing that it might soften the blow of your horse-riding chastising.

‘I did not think you to be such a stickler for the rules, Mr Munson,’ you found yourself to tease the man. Where the nerve to do so came from, you did not know, but it looked to be appreciated. Eddie shook his head, possibly already regretting his following words.

‘May I at least ask where you will be headed then?’ 

‘I have not thought of that yet,’ you responded honestly. ‘I might just see where Barley takes me.’ At this, however, the stableman visibly winced. You raised a brow. ‘Is something the matter?’

Eddie shook his head in disappointment.  ‘I only wish you had not said that, miss. I cannot, in good conscience, let Barley Sugar go out unprepared like that. The old thing could get lost or, even worse, hurt. To even think of such a thing happening—’ he looked away, reminding you of how the actors moved in the many plays you had visited at the theatre. ‘Well, it is simply too painful even to consider.’  

‘I am sure Barley can manage such a venture… and she is certainly not old.’

‘Of course,’ he corrected, ‘But we must consider the risks and wouldn’t want anything to happen to Barley, now, would we?’ As he spoke, you made the grave mistake of finding his eyes and the stare he greeted you with, while warm, was intense and rather dizzying. 

You cleared your throat, suppressing a smile, ‘Well, perhaps, if you insist, you should be the one to accompany me on this ride… for Barley’s sake.’

‘For Barley’s sake.’ He echoed your words softer, and just like that, any protocol that should have been considered was thrown out the window. As a newly acquired help, Eddie had no right to accompany you on outings as a chaperone, not without senior permission, at the least. And yet, it was not even ten minutes later that you were both seated on your horses— you upon Barley Sugar and Eddie on the back of a dark brown stallion named Marzipan—and briskly making your way out of the enclosed grounds of the estate.

Ever since, as if by a magnet, you felt yourself pulled towards that particular side of the garden at the sight of any inconvenience. You knew that there was not only an ear always eager to listen but a voice happy to speak to you freely and happily. And though most days, there would be the excuse of a horse or carriage ride for your visit, other times, you would plainly sit by as Eddie worked, chatting away for hours on end or however much time you had to offer. 

‘Are you quite sure that it is alright for you to be here, miss?’ Eddie asked after a week’s worth of your visits. You watched him pick up a large sack of feed as if it weighed nothing at all and put it across the stable room. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, revealing that however strainless the carrying of the weight might seem, he had certainly put his muscles to work.

‘I may not own this house directly,’ you answered, ‘but I am the lord’s daughter, and I am free to do as I please… to a certain extent.’ No one could tell you not to roam through the grounds or converse with the groom in your free time, but total freedom you had not. 

 ‘Well, with risk or not,’ Eddie threw another sack on top of the previous, ‘I consider it a great honour to be the recipient of your company.’

‘I am surprised none of the gentlemen have attempted to use such a phrase to charm me.’ You could not help but roll your eyes. ‘And besides, Mr Munson, the honour is all mine. It is rare for me to find a person that finds me agreeable enough to talk to me at such length as you do.’ And one I find as agreeable too, you considered adding but decided against it. 

That smile peeked out over his lips again as he walked up to you. ‘Well, I have hardly any choice, I mean, when you come here to my place of work, it’s not like I can just walk away.’

‘Oh, you,’ you pushed at him lightly. But with him having squatted down to meet you at eye level, the slight push was enough to topple him over onto the ground. And to think I wanted to ask you to escort me on another horse ride.’

‘In these clothes?’ Eddie looked at the both of you, him covered in mud and dust, and your dress was much the same. ‘What will people think?’ 

You got off your makeshift seat to help him back on his feet. 

‘Then let us hope there will be no one to see us.’

❀❀❀

The carriage wobbled over the uneven ground as you distanced yourselves from the Parsnell estate, and the quiet of the night was filled with your retelling of the evening.

‘So I am to understand that this,’ Eddie cocked his head your way, referring to your dress, ‘was your own doing?’

‘I thought it quite ingenious,’ you shrugged.

‘And what of this Mr… Harrington? He must still be looking for you with that maid of his I imagine.’ 

‘No.’ But the image of a disappointed Mr Harrington walking through the room, a maid in tow, with you nowhere to be seen, did sting at your heart a little with guilt. ‘Do you really think he is still looking for me?’ A giggle burst through against your better judgment despite your attempts to suppress it with the hand you covered your mouth with. ‘I am quite cruel, aren’t I?’

‘Absolutely wicked,’ Eddie commented with a weirdly proud smile. As the road went on straight, he took his eyes off it from time to time to glance your way—just briefly and only a handful of times, but enough for you to notice. You could only hope he was not as observant towards your actions.

‘What is it?’ you asked after several more glances directed towards you as a sweet silence fell between you. 

‘It is nothing,’ Eddie smiled it off.

‘Which means it is certainly something. Go on, enlighten me.’

He shook his head. ‘I suppose it is just that, from how you described the night, I do not see what must be so awful about it— you speak of delicious food, drinking and dancing. I don’t necessarily see a problem in this.’

‘Because that is not the problem. It is not the dancing, it is who I am to dance with.’ You sighed. ‘Night after night, it is an endless rotation of the same men I am as uninterested in as the very first day I met them. They corner me to ask me a million questions, each shallower than the last, only to then try and coax me into a dance where they will surely trample my feet.’

‘I see,’ Eddie nodded, but perhaps it was only the vibrations caused by the carriage’s movement that made him agree with your ramblings. 

‘I apologise. I do not mean to talk of my problems constantly.’ Indeed, the man must have his own issues, and ones that most likely outweighed your marital prospects severely. 

‘You have nothing to be sorry for, miss. I am happy to listen,’ he said earnestly.

‘Very well,’ you contemplated your words for a moment until you quickly blurted out with curiosity, ‘but how was your evening?’ 

‘Mine?’ To your surprise, your question had caused Eddie to chuckle.

‘Yes. I assume you must have done something to fulfil the last hours. Or do carriage drivers freeze up when unattended, only to thaw at their master’s command?’

‘I would say that is partly true.’ He quickly looked your way with a smile before explaining himself. ‘For the most part, when on duty, you have to keep your mind on the job, so I cannot exactly indulge in things and have to be ready in case a lady’s dress is ruined and she is in dire need of her getaway carriage.’ Your eyes met briefly. ‘But that does not mean that I am to sit still in an empty room until you come to call, no.’

‘So? What is it that you do in the meantime?’ 

‘Card games, for the most part.’ He shrugged, not seeing your interest in the topic, too focused on the road ahead to notice how you eagerly looked at him, awaiting his following words. 

You had to admit, until that night, you had never put much thought behind the private lives of those who waited on you. Yes, you understood that not all their day revolved around you or your family, but you also never considered it to be any of your business to follow theirs. You listened whenever your maid, Claire, told you stories about her family, storing the basic information of the names and so on in the back of your mind, but at the end of the day, these were nothing more than anecdotes amid polite conversation. Yet, with Eddie, you were eager to know everything about him. The longer you spoke, the more questions filled your mind, and the less adequate you felt to ask them. You were, after all, friendly, or so you hoped, but you knew there was a thick line in society when it came to friendships such as this one, and you were not sure where that line would be crossed and if to be scared of what would happen once it happened. But now and then, curiosity got the better of you, and you managed to trickle in a question for Eddie to open up to you.

‘What er– kind of card games?’ You nudged on in your questioning. 

‘The regular kind, the ones nobody mentions by name, but everyone simply knows the rules of.’

‘I do not think I am familiar with any of such kind,’ you admitted. In the meantime, the carriage drew to a slow halt at the crossing of two roads. ‘You take the left here,’ you told Eddie, who looked at you in surprise. 

‘I cannot say my navigational skills are perfect,’ you said, ‘but I pay attention, and I remember going past the large boulder on our way to the party. There.’ You pointed towards the rock some meters away from the crossing in the left direction.

‘You are quite observant, I’ll give you that.’ He brought the horses back to action, and the rattling of hooves and wheels on the uneven ground resumed. As you passed the large boulder once more, Eddie then resumed your conversation. ‘You do not play any card games, then?’

‘I will admit, I prefer chess, but I do often play Cribbage with my siblings—or Brag. My brother Nicholas is also very fond of Piquet, and as I am the only one in the house that can stand his unsportsmanlike antics, he often forces me to play it with him.’

‘Very well,’ Eddie listened, then asked, ‘Do you know Trischaken?’

‘Pardon?’ you barely understood what he had said. 

‘Trischaken. It’s a Prussian card game, or perhaps Austrian; you’ll have to excuse my awful memory for geography.’ At this, you both laughed politely,

‘No, I do not think I have heard of it.’

‘Oh, it’s great, I must teach how to play one day.’ Only once his enthusiasm unfogged his mind a second later did Eddie pull back the excitement of his invitation to a polite suggestion, ‘If that is something that would interest you… ma’am.’

‘I would like that very much.’ You smiled, showing a bigger and more authentic smile than you had the entirety of the passing night. And barely did that smile fade for the remaining hours as you drove back home and listened to Eddie talk, trying to explain the rules of the intricate foreign game or tell you about his life outside of work. 

‘I did not take you for a music fanatic.’ You admitted as you approached the vicinity of Ridlington Park, its gates already glowing from the lights around it in the near distance. 

‘It must be a very sour sort of man that does not enjoy music. Are there really such types?’

‘And he is more common than you’d imagine, I am afraid, and it seems to be the type that my parents see me to marry one day.’

‘I am beginning to understand your problem,’ Eddie said, ‘but yes, music has always had a special place in my heart. My father had taught me how to play when I was a young boy and since then, it’s always brought me a great comfort. It was actually one of the very few things I brought with me from America.’

‘Is it hard? being so far away from your family?’ You asked softly, unable to imagine how you would feel if you were to leave everything and everyone you had ever known to work in some foreign land on the opposite side of the world. 

‘There are many things that I am still growing accustomed to, but I cherish the change.’

‘That is a very diplomatic mindset. I for one could not bear a day without the possibility of seeing my family, I think, no matter how meddlesome they are.’

Eddie’s eyes shimmered with kindness for your words. ‘I suppose I have grown used to it. I have been travelling for years now and have not seen my family for an even longer time, so it is actually the lack of independence and presence of…. this closeness of others that I am attempting to grow used to now.’

‘Ah.’ You blinked, not having expected that kind of response. Immediately, as the door of Eddie’s past unlocked, even if just for a moment, a mountain of questions spilt inside you, but you pushed those urges back. ‘I see. Well, if you ever require solitude and wish me to leave you alone, please be not afraid to just tell me so. I shall respect your wishes.’ Had you been too eager to sit beside him for the entirety of the ride, talking his ear off? Or all those other days when you bothered him at work. Oh, the embarrassment. If it was not for the fact that you were already coming through the Ridlington Park gates, you would have jumped off the carriage and walked the rest of the way home.

‘No, I did not mean it like that.’ Eddie quickly recovered his words. ‘Please, do not think I do not greatly appreciate and enjoy our conversations. They— they have been the highlight of my days.’

‘Really?’ Your proud smile was too strong to keep at bay. 

‘Yes, really.’ Eddie’s words pushed out a breathy laugh. ‘I see it as a welcome escape from the work.’

‘So do I,’ you noticed the wrong fit of your phrasing, ‘I mean, I enjoy our conversations as well.’ Would it be too much to call them an escape from reality? To him, perhaps. The entire night had already been a far breach of that line of what is proper or not for a lady to do. You knew you were awaiting a scolding the second your mother returned from the Parsnell ball. Now, the territory your and Eddie’s exchange was heading into felt anxiously foreign, somewhere you realised you had never gone to with any of your friends or acquaintances. Your heart picked up its pace as the carriage slowed down for the final time that night, arriving at its destination. 

Before you could do or say anything, Eddie had jumped out of the driver’s seat and ran across the back of the hansom to assist your exit. He extended his hand for you to take, and the moment your fingertips met, you knew it had been a mistake. Your hold tightened around his hand as you took the steps onto the ground, and though you found your footing perfectly well, you did not find the power to let go of Eddie.

And neither did he of you.

The two of you stood in front of each other, eyes locked into a deep gaze, only broken by his glances to the point where you were connected. Your hand was in his and burning like a fire between you; for the brief seconds as they pulled you closer together, your fingertips felt like the centre of the entire universe.

A fire that surely would burn and scar if you were to touch it.

It was dangerous. You knew it.

But what was life without a bit of risk?

‘My apologies,’ Eddie cleared his throat, taking a step back, letting your hand fall through the cold air.

‘There is no need for that.’ You shook your head out of all thoughts, or at least attempted to do so. ‘It is I who should apologise. If you will excuse me, I must change into something less… cakey. Good night, Mr Munson.’ You looked down at your dress, which was still, very much, covered in remnants of wine and cake. You were to leave, but Eddie quickly called to you, almost as if the words were faster than his mouth.

‘How many times must I ask you just to call me Eddie?’ His eyes were those of a pleading man, pleading for something you did not quite comprehend, but at the same time, you knew the consequences of giving in to his request.

You looked back at the windows of Ridlington Park. The building was enveloped in darkness, as no one was there to occupy the rooms or to see you. All you could do was remind yourself that there was nothing wrong with you being alone with a carriage driver or any other member of staff, but it certainly did not feel that way. There was undoubtedly something dangerous going on in that instance.

You took a deep breath as he held it in. The line you were scared to cross was getting thinner, and you grasped for something to hold onto as you felt your feet slip away. 

‘Good night, Eddie.’

And just like that, with only the hope there was no one around to see it, you both fell.

To be continued...

Thank you so much for reading!! I really do hope you enjoyed this chapter. Remember the best way to support writers is to reblog and share. I love to hear what people think of my stories so feel free to leave a comment or an ask or message. And don't forget to join the taglist if you want to be kept up to date on the chapters [yes, I promise, more will be coming]

[runesandramblings]

I Just Want You

Word Count: 1400

Pairings: Fili x reader

Warnings: None

Description: Royal wedding plans begin to take their toll, but there's only one thing you require to make the day perfect.

Requested by anon so I don't have a way to tag you I'm sorry! But I hope you enjoy. 😇

“What do you think, nâtha? The lilies or the orchids?” 

You buried your face in your hands. The pounding against your temples, something that had become a familiar sensation as of late, began to worsen as you tried to piece together any coherent sentence. There were only three words that came to mind, the same three words you’d uttered countless times over the past several weeks. 

“I don’t know.” 

The joy of yours and Fili’s engagement had subsided the moment you’d broken the news to your families. With FIli being the crown prince and heir, there was no way Dis and your mother would let it be a simple affair. Invitations had already been sent out to every corner of Middle Earth, and you’d been occupied from sunup to sundown every day with planning. The dress, the flowers, the food… 

You were from a simple merchant family. The pomp and ceremony of royalty made no sense to you. Where you’d grown up, weddings were a simple affair. Most couples in your small village chose to elope rather than go through the bother of an elaborate ceremony. You’d have been more than happy to do the same. However, your mother and future mother in law had both been quick to dismiss the idea. 

“It’s no matter, dear. We have time to decide.” Your mother pulled several small scraps of fabric, ranging from the purest snow white to the creamier shades of ivory. She laid them out against the table and gestured to each. “Which color do you think for the dress? We’ve got to begin sewing soon if it will be ready in time.” 

Before you had the chance to respond, Dis laid out several different styles of gold and silver fabric beside the scraps your mother had laid down. 

“And what of the trim? You’ve got to decide if you prefer gold accents or silver. But I do suppose that would have an effect on the choice of flowers…” She trailed off, lost in her own world of thought. 

You could feel your pulse radiating against your temples as the migraine that had been forming worsened. This was the issue exactly. It wasn’t just selecting a dress. It was selecting a type of fabric, a trim, lace… And that had to coordinate with the flowers or else…

Or else what, exactly? Would the world cease to exist if the flowers and trim didn’t go together? Would Mahal himself descend from the sky if the food and the wine didn’t pair perfectly? 

You looked from where you sat at the head of the long, carved wood table to the opposite end. Fili sat on his own, silently working through a stack of parchments Thorin had given him. He hadn’t been overly involved in the plans, as your mothers had taken over almost immediately. But you’d expressed to him how stressful the process had been, and he’d decided to come sit with you for moral support. He met your gaze and gave you a gentle smile. It sent butterflies through your stomach, as it always did. He was all you needed, truly. You could get married in the same, tattered old dress he’d met you in carrying a bouquet of wildflowers for all you cared. As long as he was there, it was all you required.

“(Y/N)?” 

Your mother’s voice brought you back to the less desirable reality. She and Dis were both staring at you expectantly, the colored swatches of cloth still spread out across the table in front of you. 

“Silver or gold-”

“First, she has to decide on a shade of white. Which shade do you prefer, (Y/N)?” 

“Well it might help to decide on the accent first, then she can pick a white that goes with that.” 

As Dis and your mother began speaking over each other you buried your face in your hands once again. The pounding against your temples became rhythmic, a steady thump that seemed to grow louder and louder as their voices overlapped. You felt as though you might go mad if the pounding and the questions didn't stop soon.

“(Y/N)-” Dis started. 

“I don’t know!” You cried again, finally raising your head to look at the two of them. “I don’t know, okay? And I don’t care. Just pick a color. Whatever you both want.” 

You flung yourself back in the chair, crossing your arms over your chest. It was unlike you to have such an outburst, but you were exhausted. There were too many questions, too many decisions. You’d be more than happy for them to make the choices and just tell you when and where to show up on the day of. 

“And what do you want, amrâlimê?” 

The three of you turned your attention to the end of the table as Fili piped up. He’d laid his parchments to the side. His eyes were not on either of your mothers, but on you. You could see the genuine concern etched in the lines that furrowed between his brows. He knew the planning had begun to take a toll, and now he was able to see the full amount of stress that you were under. 

You felt tears begin to sting the corners of your eyes. 

“I just want you.” You said quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. 

Your mothers exchanged shameful glances across the table, finally seeming to realize just how much they’d piled on you at once. FIli’s expression softened as he continued to look at you, his eyes never breaking away to look at anyone else in the room.

“Could you leave us for a moment?” He asked. 

Dis and your mother stood silently, collecting the fabric and other wedding items they’d strewn across the table. You felt Dis place a hand apologetically on your shoulder as she followed your mother from the room. 

Once they’d gone Fili’s smile widened. He extended his hand to you, gesturing for you to come join him at the end of the table. You stood and quickly walked around to where he sat. Once you were within his arm’s reach he grabbed you, pulling you down by your waist and plopping you into his lap. As soon as your legs touched his he stretched his face up to your neck, peppering light kisses up and down your collarbones. You giggled as his mustache braids tickled the exposed skin of your neck, his lips working their way up to plant kisses along your cheeks. He finally found your mouth and pressed his delicately against yours, making it the gentlest and sweetest kiss of them all. 

You felt a contented sigh escape your lips as he pulled you closer to him, wrapping his arms tightly around your waist. You rested your chin on top of his head as your fingers began to slowly brush through his hair, careful as always not to disturb his perfectly placed braids. The feeling of his arms wrapped snugly around your waist had already alleviated the nervous pit in your stomach, and you wondered how it could have only been moments ago that you were stressed to the point of breaking down in tears. He was your safe place, your calm within the storm. 

“We don’t have to make it into a spectacle, you know.” He murmured into the collar of your dress. “It can just be the two of us, whenever and wherever you want.” 

“We can’t.” You said, wistfully. If only it were that simple. 

“And who says so?” 

“You’re the prince-”

“To hell with that.” He said, pulling back just enough to look up at you. “Thorin’s already given his blessing for us to skip the whole affair.” 

“But our mothers-”

“To hell with them too.” His expression quickly changed from confidence to one of fear as he looked over his shoulder. “Don’t tell them I said that.” 

You giggled again, pulling him closer to you as he nuzzled his face into your neck once more. 

“Amrâlimê, I will go get Balin right now and have him perform the ceremony in this very room.” He continued. “I don’t need the flowers or the food or the party. I just want you, too.” 

You pulled back again, just enough to look down into his eyes. He was smiling up at you, his eyes sparkling with the same joy as they had the first day you met. He was all you needed, now and forever. 

“I think that sounds absolutely perfect.” You said, brushing back a few loosened strands of his golden hair. “On one condition.”

He looked at you expectantly as you continued. 

“You have to tell our mothers.”

nâtha - daughter

amrâlimê - my love

[cagesofgold]

eren jaeger headcanons <3

🎵teenage fever - Drake 🎧

His favorite way to unwind is to play with your hair. Due to having longer hair himself he’s grown accustomed to the different skill sets required to craft different hair styles, and actually, is really good at it. His fingers are lithe and nimble and are able to weave through strands with ease.

He drives an all black car with tinted windows, and has a polaroid of you in a photo booth with him on your first date in a plastic case hanging from his rear view mirror.

he also always makes sure to keep your favorite snacks in the car, as he’s a guy who’s bound to text you at 2am asking bout some “you up for a drive?” 💀

in terms of tattoos despite popular belief, i personally think he’d keep it on the minimal side. He’d maybe have some on his arms - or a sleeve, but he likes to keep them tidy. Although, he is one of those guys that would have that tiktok thirst trap spider on his chest or adjacent to his v line…..

this mf smells gooooood, he’s so paranoid about smelling bad because of Jean saying he smelt like a burning pile of bodies in high school and hasn’t been able to shake the fear since.

despite not being overly adorned in tattoos he does like piercings. He’s got about five on his ears and has a nose piercing but he always forgets about it.

loves reality shows. A few months into your relationship he noticed you watching them and acted with his full chest that he had no interest, yet as the weeks rolled by he somehow got closer and closer to the couch and before you knew it he was fully shouting over Lisa Rinna. (You’ve also seen him following over 30 housewives from the different shows on instagram…)

cannot stand metal music because he spent his entire childhood covering his ears from where it bled from under Mikasa’s door. (Otherwise he’d probably enjoy it)

he’d dress quite simply, mainly with blacks and whites and would sometimes mix and match with some red or green, but i don’t think he’s as ambitious as some of his friends fashion wise, but he still looks good as hell.

his favorite holiday is with out a doubt halloween, is some of this because he spent so long as a child building the most elaborate scares for the kids on his street? maybe. but he also likes autumn as a season so that has something to do with it.

doesn’t get along with his dad too well but is a total mamas boy. He visits her at least twice a month considering they live in different cities.

is a cat person, but when he was younger he liked dogs more as according to him they were “much radder” - his own words 💀, but as he got older and became more subdued he developed a preference for cats.

has anxiety that he manages to hide, he wasn’t used to being comforted and it took a while for him to fully open up to you.

despite smoking weed with Jean and connie almost every other day he still makes a dramatic scene any time Zeke lights a cigarette around him, i’m talking coughing and clutching his chest, Zeke’s standing there like this 🧍‍♀️waiting for him to stop his fucking shenanigans.

if you want to go out with Eren Jaeger prepare to be a victim of the sassy man apocalypse, because my god, this man is relentless, and the SIDE EYE on this mf is ridiculous. He could knock down an army with his sass alone.

takes good care of his hair, oils it twice a week and does hair masks in order to keep it soft and shiny. He can’t have his gorgeous girl going out with some guy with brittle, greasy ass hair…

goes to the gym but doesn’t like it very much. he goes most days for at least an hour but never posts gym pics on his instagram or anything, he just has no interest apart from maintaining his body.

cannot sleep without you. he can try, sure, but he’ll never be successful. Before you both decided to move in together he was at your house every night, nuzzled against your body with light breaths slipping from his lips, which sparked the conversation, why not just move in, you’re here everyday anyway?

tends to bottle things up, and if something is bothering him you will have to work it out of him slowly…but he’s trying, for you he’s trying.

his lock screen is a photo of you asleep against his chest, he just thought you looked so peaceful.

gets embarrassingly competitive in just dance, threw a Wii at Connie once because he made him lose a perfect score on timber.

finally, he loves stargazing, especially with you. He’ll take you out to a deserted street, a bag full of snacks and a joint as you both lay on the hood of his car, chatting about whatever comes to mind, and it’s at those moments, when his eyes focus on the slope of your nose and the shape of your mouth, that he feels a warmth inside him he’s never felt before. <3

[thebestofoneshots]

Gilded Constellations | (wolfstar x reader)

Series Masterlist | Previous episode

Pairing: Wolfstar x Reader Word Count: 8 K Warnings: Graphic descriptions of violence. (Reader discretion is advised). Prompt: You'll get even... This IS a wolfstar x reader fic, but it's incredibly slow burn. They won't start all dating each other until we're very deep into the story, but I promise the long wait will be worth it.

Chapter 25: I’ll Get Even With You

Thursday, November 25th, 1976

The boys had walked you through their plan step by step, it wasn’t going to be easy, and it required a lot of technical skill to be performed, but it wasn’t impossible. You gave them a few suggestions here and there, you yourself had already been pondering different revenge ideas in your head and together you managed to come up with a rather elaborate but hopefully foolproof plan. 

Remus and you would work on the potions since you were best at them, and you would prepare them that very night, since, as Sirius said “There is no time to lose, we need to strike and we need to strike fast. They must know it’s retaliation for what they did.” 

James and Sirius would be in charge of charms, spells and hexes, and Peter would do recognizance, making sure the coasts were clear before you snuck inside the Slytherin common room to prepare every single one of the things you had in store. 

The planning job they had executed so far was truly astounding, and if this level of meticulous preparation was standard for all their pranks, it was no wonder they were renowned for their incredible feats. Clearly, this wasn't just some fleeting idea that had occurred to them in the shower; it had been meticulously crafted. It bordered on madness and teetered on the edge of hazardous. The exhaustive list of steps might have deterred even the bravest Gryffindor, and yet, despite all these elements, there was an undeniable thrill to it, an unmistakable, electrifying excitement that pulsed through every aspect of the plan. 

As you looked at the list of steps, you marked all the things that you’d be doing, you had to memorise it and burn the page after. You had to leave “no evidence,” Peter had whispered. 

One time he had been caught with one of the plans and everyone had been put in detention for an entire month, from that moment on, they had made one of the key steps of all of their plans to memorise everything. You thought it made sense and started to drill all the steps in your mind, even the ones that didn’t concern you, just in case. 

By midday, and as you were walking alongside the boys towards Magical Theory, you had already memorised and burned the parchment the boys had given you. James, Sirius and Remus had their heads so close together as they were whispering about. Peter was right in front of them, he decided he’d walk all the way to your class even if he had to be late to his own.  And you? You were right in the middle of them all. Sirius had grabbed you by your good arm and pulled you in closer gently so you could be part of the conversation. 

It was weird, to be in the planning rather than just a spectator from the side, giving them enough space to discuss their things as you always had. But not anymore, even Peter had been welcoming and willing to let you in on absolutely every single detail of the plan. Yes, it might have been a little different, but it was definitely the good kind of different, you liked being a part of it. Even more now, since it was your own little revenge. 

Of course, you wouldn’t do something that would really harm the Slytherins, not like they had done to you at least. You were aware neither of them knew about Remus, so when they threw you in the Shrieking Shack, they really had attempted nothing more than to give you the hell scare of your life. “The most haunted house in England”, one of them had said. 

The only person that actually knew about Moony was Severus, and even if he had been a total asshole, he had also gone and told Lily about it, which had ultimately saved your life, since she had been the one to tell the boys. Either way, he could have also stopped them from being stupid and suggested a different thing, but he did not, so the fact that you had almost gotten bitten by Moony was also his fault. Which was exactly why he wouldn’t get scot-free either.

Even if the Shrieking Shack had actually just been a haunted house, the worst thing they had done, would have been the fact that they pushed you around, hexed you a couple of times, manhandled and threatened you, which is nothing they wouldn’t have done in the school, so you all had to carefully plan something that held the perfect balance. 

The prank couldn’t be too dark or harmful, just enough to teach them a lesson, so that they learned that throwing people in haunted houses and attempting to scare this shit out of one of them was a dreadful thing to do.  Which is why your prank had mainly consisted of something of the same nature. 

“So you’ll talk to him about it?” Peter asked. 

“Yes, I think I can convince him.” 

“You sure?” James asked, “It’s pivotal for the plan that we get help from one of the–” 

“–Yes, I’m sure. Most of them already know what happened, Myrtle ran her mouth through their own little circle.” 

“Thought you were friends with her,” Peter said. 

“I’m as much of her friend as you can be,” you said with a shrug “but only the close circle knows, and I asked her earlier today to give him a message, I’ll meet him later near the Perfect Bathrooms, I’ve heard they’re empty rather often.” 

“You can meet him inside if you want, I’ll give you the password,” Remus offered. 

“She can’t meet him inside the bathrooms, it’d be inappropriate!” Peter argued. 

“How would it be inappropriate Wormmy?”

“Well you know, people might talk and…” 

“As if Myrtle didn’t spend half the time there too,” Remus huffed.

“But that’s–“ 

“Hold up! How do you know Myrtle spends half the time there?” you asked, looking at Remus in disbelief. 

“Well, I’ve seen her there, plenty of times, logically.” 

“While… bathing?” you asked again, rather hesitant. 

“She can be very meddlesome, yeah.” 

“And she’s never told me?!” 

“Didn’t you say you weren’t that close?” Sirius said, arching an eyebrow. 

You weren’t really listening “Oh Godric! The gossip she must have seen in those bathrooms.” 

Remus turned to you now “What do you think happens in those bathrooms?” 

“What do you think doesn’t? Unsupervised, private bathrooms the older students have access to?” 

“Oh…” Remus said in realisation. 

Sirius nodded “Yeah, I can confirm things happen there,” he said casually. You gasped and swatted him in the side, it was as if he had forgotten he was talking to his girlfriend with whom he had not gone to the bathrooms… yet. “From hearing about it,” he clarified, at least an octave higher as he rubbed the section you had hit him on. Drama queen, you thought, didn’t even hit him half hard. 

“So… you want the password?”

You thought about it for a second “Yeah… I guess it comes in handy, just in case…” you said. Sirius gave you a suggestive look. 

“Ugh mate, at least try and keep it in your pants!” James said, pushing Sirius to the side, causing you to tumble against Remus’ chest, who held you in place and arched an eyebrow as he looked at you from his higher stance, he seemed amused. 

“For the prank!” you clarified as if it were obvious. 

Remus nodded, the same amused look as earlier, Godric was it fun to tease you, even if the reason you were getting red for was Sirius and not himself. You were blushing, becoming shyer the wider he smirked. You pushed yourself off him, which had his little smile falter even if it was just for a second. “If you boys keep being gross about this whole thing I’ll just go hang out with Lily instead.” 

“You can’t, we’ve got class together,” James said, placing his arm over your shoulder “and whether you like it or not, you’re my partner.” You gave an exaggerated groan in response, tilting your head back just a little to make it seem more dramatic. “Oi! I’m not that bad!” 

“You talk about Lily all the time, and since your date is on Saturday I can’t imagine how much you will–“ 

“–Righ! you need to help me with the planning of that too!” He said taking his arm off your shoulder and turning to you excitedly. 

“But that plan is already done…” 

“But what will I say if–“ 

Sirius came over now, placing his arms over your shoulder “Mate, if you need her to tell you what to do in every single situation, why not let her go on the date with Lily instead?” 

“She’s your girlfriend!” James said scandalised. 

“Wouldn’t mind sharing her with Evans,” Sirius responded with a shrug which had you laughing, “she’s nice, they’d make a hot couple, actually,” the boy added, just to see James’ reaction. 

“Don’t you dare come seduce my future wife!” he said, turning to you with a threatening finger and in a playful tone. 

“As much as I’m into redheads, Lilly is most definitely just a friend,” you responded. 

“What do you mean you’re into redheads?” Sirius asked, turning to you a little shocked. 

You just shugged, “Red hair is really pretty…” 

“But I… I thought that… You said I was your type!” 

You shook your head with a teasing smile “You said you were my type Puppy.” 

Sirius seemed taken aback, but that was right, he really had been the one to say that Remus wasn’t your type because he was, you could practically see the gears turning in his head as his confident expression faltered, which had you suppress a giggle “So you like redheads then?” he said a little defensively “next thing I know you’ll come around telling me you’re also into sexy werewolves.” 

Remus almost choked on the piece of chocolate he was munching, but he played it off with a cough, you just gave Sirius a diverted look “Puppy,” you said with a raised eyebrow “Are you jealous ‘cause I said I’m into redheads?” 

“Of course not,” he said, “Why don’t you go and flirt with one of the Weaslys then?” 

You just laughed, you had no idea who the hell he was talking about since Arthur had graduated a couple of years before you even got into the school, and his younger brother was in 2nd (you had yet to meet him). “Sirius,” you said, calling his attention by leaning in to whisper in his ear “I might be into redheads, but I still like you better than any of ‘em.” 

Sirius almost went red, for a second, but got back on his feet faster than he faltered, and turned to you with a smirk “Well of course you do Starshine,” he said cockily, “After all you’ve got the hottest boyfriend in the entire school.” 

You, along with the boys, laughed at Sirius’ antiques. But she really does, Remus thought as he chuckled and extended his hand with the chocolate towards you, you took a square and bit half of it off before feeding the rest to Sirius. Remus swallowed, wondering if he could be happy with this. With just being a part of it by sticking to the two of you like he was doing then. He wondered if he would be able to survive the heartache whenever he was consumed by greed and desire to have one of you. Whenever he felt like he had to stop being a spectator and take part in the story instead. He shook that thought off his head, he had to focus on the prank now, that was the priority. 

Once near the classroom, Peter waved goodbye, walking to his class while you entered yours. You and James sat behind Sirius and Remus, and while you did attempt to work on your project, in the end, you had spent most of the time going over the plan with James. He had it all perfectly memorised, and he was now telling you how Remus and Sirius would sneak into the library to get the book with the charms they’d be practising all night while you and Remus prepared the special potions you’d be using later that day. 

“So they’ll use the map to sneak in and…” 

“What map?” you asked “Did Remus make more maps for the rest of the passages?”

“Oh well…” James seemed at a loss of words, then leaned down to talk to the boys, you arched an eyebrow, but watched as they whispered about. “Can we tell Vixen about the map?” 

“Yeah, she’ll see it when we go make the potions anyway,” Remus said. 

“I trust her,” Sirius said with a shrug. 

“Of course you do tosser, she’s your girlfriend,” James said with an eye roll “I trust her too, but what about Peter?” 

“I don’t think he’ll mind…” Remus said. 

“You don’t?!” Sirius asked, “He can be touchy as hell sometimes.” 

“But he likes her,” James added, more convincing himself than the rest, “I’ll tell her about it.” 

Finally, you leaned in, having your head almost bump into Remus’ who was sitting in front of you “Tell me about what?” you asked teasingly. 

Remus smiled, “Oh you’ll see,” he responded mischievously “I’ll tell you all about it later.” 

“Mr. Potter, and company,” you heard the voice of the teacher booming in your direction. “Would you mind telling me what’s so important that Mr. Lupin and Mr. Black have to say that you’re not focusing on your work instead?” 

“Sorry Professor,” you apologised. “I was just asking Remus about a particular charm he’s really good at, and we need to use it for our project. James was trying to listen in since both of us will be performing it and Sirius was just trying to help us out as well,” then you flashed the most charming and apologetic smile you could muster. 

“Well then, you should have told me earlier,” he said “Why don’t you guys move your chairs around so you can focus on your conversation better, instead of leaning down over your desks like that?” 

“That would be delightful! Thank you, Professor,” you said with another smile as motioned for Remus and Sirius to stand up as you flicked your want to move their chairs towards you.

“Ugh, you really need to teach me your ways,” Sirius said as he stared at you “I swear I’m charming but… he would’ve eaten me up had I tried something like that.” 

You looked over at the Professor, at the way he held himself “Nah, I’m sure you would’ve convinced him with one of those flashy smiles of yours,” you said with a shrug, “Even James would have convinced him.” 

“Way to leave Moony out,” the boy said with a low whistle that earned him a kick from Sirius, for making so much noise. 

“Thought it was obvious, Remus would’ve convinced him before I even attempted to do it, Professors love him to dеath.” 

“What?! that’s not–“ Remus started. 

Sirius and James interrupted him “Yes it is!” 

In the end, you went over the steps of the plan one more time before you went back to working on your actual class projects. You and James ended up working on the night vision glasses and because of how useful they could be, both of you started digging through books to try and figure out if you could actually finish them before the prank. 

Eventually, you did find a spell that could work, and while you were drawing a bunch of runes on the wooden table, James was writing down a copy of the spell on a piece of paper so the two of you could enchant the object at the same time. 

Both Remus and Sirius were impressed with how fast and in tandem you were working, as if you really had known each other for longer than you had. It was easy to forget how freaking brilliant James was while he was cracking jokes half the time, but he was as much of a genius as the rest of the boys, even if each of them had their thing. The class finished, and since you had lunch, neither you nor the boys worried too much about leaving the classroom as you continued working on your spell. 

That was until Lily showed up near the door “There you are!” She said once she spotted you “I was looking for you, time to change your bandages!” She said pulling a roll-out of her bag “We’ve got like 30 minutes before Defence Against the Dark Arts–” 

Your eyes opened wide, “–30 minutes?!” you asked shocked and turned to the clock “fuck, I’m supposed to be in the bathrooms with Richie,” you said as you stood up and placed your robes around your shoulders to then start unbuttoning the shirt, your back facing the boys.

Lilly took off her own robes and levitated them around you to give you more room to move around as her robes covered you while you took off your shirt, “Why do you need to see Richard near the bathrooms?” She asked. 

“It’s confidential!” James said before you even had a chance to open your mouth. 

“Yeah darling, don’t tell the beautiful redhead, no matter how tempting,” Sirius teased right after. 

You rolled your eyes and Lily arched one of her eyebrows “What’s that about?” She asked as she opened the roll and took out a small pot with her cream, you were unwrapping the older bandages while at it so that you could both end faster and you could run off to see Richie before he got too angry. 

“I accidentally told Sirius I was into redheads,” you said with a shrug “he probably won’t stop teasing me about it.”

“Oh,” she said surprised, taking the bandage you were unrolling with her own hands and helping you with it “Didn’t know you were into redheads…” she said casually “Would you mind if I tease Sirius about it?” 

“Not at all,” you said, “be my guest,” you smiled complicitly. 

“Oh wow,” she said as she looked at your injury “You heal fast,” she said surprised. 

You turned towards it, and she was right, while the wound wasn’t completely healed, it was significantly better than it had been the day before, let alone today in the morning when you were crying as you tried to cure it in the Room of Requirements. Perhaps the piercing paste you had somehow mustered up in the morning did something good in the end, even if it had hurt a hell lot while doing it. Either that or it was something else, either way, you were just happy it was looking better, if it went on like that, you might just be able to convince James to let you play on Sunday. 

“Ready for your date on Saturday?” you whispered, you could tell there was a slight blush creeping up her neck.

“That bastard is lucky I said yes, I don’t even know how exactly he convinced me,” she muttered. 

I do, you thought as you remembered the glass of punch she had in her hands at the party, “No idea, perhaps you just were really happy,” either way, it’s not like the euphoria potion made you do anything you didn’t want to, in fact, I’d go as far as to say it was like liquid courage. Of course, Remus wouldn’t agree with that opinion, or perhaps it did give him some courage, for the first five minutes or something.

“Yeah, I did feel quite happy,” Lily agreed. “It was really nice to hang out with James while taking the pictures, I guess I really hadn’t given him a chance before that.” She said as she dabbed the wound with her much more reliving paste. You would have cried from relief if it wasn’t because she’d asked you why you were crying. 

You were taking deep, slow breaths when you heard Sirius’ voice from behind Lily’s cloak “Hey luv, we’ll pick up some lunch for you so you can take your time with Richie, all right?” 

You nodded and then shook your head when you remembered he couldn’t see you “Yes, save me some sausages, will you?” 

“Whose sausages?” James teased. 

“Ugh, don’t be so gross Potter!” Lily responded “And to think I agreed to go on a date with him,” she muttered to herself. 

“I’m sorry my love,” he said in return “did not mean to upset you.” 

Lily just rolled her eyes “Get the poor girl her sausages and stop being annoying then.” You snickered as you heard Lily’s bickering and she gave you a look, you raised your free hand in surrender. A couple of minutes later she was done wrapping the bandage. “There you are darling,” she said with a smile. 

“Thanks,” you said with a smile “You’re the best.” 

Lily just smiled “Want me to come with?” she asked as she motioned to the door and you rushed to put your shirt and sweater on. 

You shook your head “It’s all right, I can deal with him. Besides, it’s kind of confidential.” 

Lily arched her eyebrows “Really? You’re not telling me what this is all about?” 

“Trust me, you’re better off like this, you’ll have plausible deniability,” you said with a smile as you finished accommodating your shirt. 

Lily was staring at you shocked as you walked to the door “What do you– (Y/N)! You can’t be working on a prank with them–“ she said as she followed behind, pulling her own robe that was still suspended in the air as she picked up her pace. “(Y/N)!” She whined when she realised just how far down one of the halls you already were. 

“Plausible deniability Lily,” you shouted from the end of the hall “Plausible deniability, trust me!” you repeated with a smile before turning in one of the corners, speeding through the halls to reach all the way to the outside of the Prefect Bathrooms, thankfully they weren’t that far off. 

After some more running you finally made it to the bathrooms, Richard Jackdaw was already there, looking a little annoyed as stared at you, as if you had him wait for too long. 

“Sorry I’m late,” you said, panting. “I got stuck in a class and then they had to change my bandages because, well, Myrtle mentioned it, didn’t she?” 

“That Barty and his gang threw you into the Shrieking Shack because you invited us to the Halloween Party?” he asked, “yeah I’ve heard… You know I had never been invited to a party before, at least not since I became a ghost a couple hundred years ago, and Myrtle, well, I’m sure she hadn’t been invited to one even when she was alive.”  

You tried not to cringe at his words, Richard could sometimes be a little bit of a boastful prick, but he was nice enough to hang around, and he had lots of interesting stories to tell, which is probably why you enjoyed hanging out with him and some of the other ghosts as much as you did. And you couldn’t blame him for his impression of Myrtle, since you had a very similar impression of her. 

“So… why am I here? Revenge, I assume.” 

You smiled, it was nice to know Richie and you were on the same page, you nodded “I want to pay them back in equal proportion,” you said with a smile. 

Richie arched an eyebrow, floating a little closer to the floor to see you eye to eye “Did ghosts really scare you in the Shack?” he asked with what you could only classify as curiosity “I know of no ghosts in there… And you aren’t particularly scared by us either…” 

You shook your head “There are no ghosts in the shack,” you confirmed, “but it is haunted by something else.” 

Richard pulled back, clearly interested in the story that you had to tell, the only thing was, that you wouldn’t tell any story, not today, possibly not ever… “And..?” he asked. 

“And nothing, the thing there did give me a hell of a scare, I almost died and everything,” you said casually “Got scratched up too–“ 

“–Yeah, Myrtle mentioned that one, she also said something about Mulciber being bedridden because of you.” 

You smiled proudly at that “Yeah, so I’ve been told,” you said “It was just Oppugno, but I guessed something funny must have gotten to him,”  you said with a shrug. 

“Aren’t you in 6th? Oppugno is a 7th year spell, I believe…” 

“It is, I’ve been reading ahead a good bit,” you said cockily “but talking about my small little success there, is not why I’ve requested to talk to you.”

“Yeah, I figured,” he said haughtily “So then, tell me, what’s the plan?” 

“Well, I know you’re a member of the Headless Hunt,” you started, Richard arched an eyebrow as he leaned in one of the statues, “And I did mention payback in the same propor–“ 

“–Shhh…” he said as he placed a transparent hand close to your mouth and looked around “fuck,” he added as he fixated his head on one of the corners “Quick, rub the head of the toad!” he pointed at a statue. 

“Excuse me?” you asked with a frown. 

“Someone’s approaching, hurry!” He added you did as told, leaning closer to the statue and passing your hand over the large toad’s head. In a matter of seconds, the mouth of the frog opened wide and swallowed you whole. You ended up rolling on the floor and coughing a couple of times as you tried to figure out where you had ended up. 

Seconds later you saw Richard float through the wall “You all right?” he asked you “Didn’t hurt your arm, did it?” 

You shook your head, almost surprised at his concern, most of the time Richard was too stuck up to care for anyone else but his ghostly self, or perhaps that was merely a façade and you were finally looking at the real Richard Jackdow, either way, you already knew he was friendly enough to be willing to talk to the new girl, so you held him in relatively high regards. 

You nodded, he offered you his hand to get up but quickly pulled it back, as if it was hard for him to remember he wasn’t alive anymore. It was a rather interesting phenomenon, you thought since most ghosts still had a hard time remembering their capabilities as dеad people even if they had been ghosts for far longer than they had been alive. Myrtle, for example, hated it when books were thrown in her direction, even if she actually couldn’t feel them. 

You gave him a tight apologetic smile as you stood up, dusting your robes as you looked around “You’ve brought me to your Secret hideout, then… Who was outside?”

“Spellman and Nightshade,” he said “We don’t want them to think we’re plotting something, do we?”  

You smiled and shook your head, looking at the small table in the centre of the room, placing your hands on it and leaning in just a little to test if it was sturdy enough to hold your weight, naturally you used your good arm to avoid hurting the other one further. When it proved it was, you turned around and gave a small jump to sit over it, legs dangling a little as you stared at the boy, ghost with a smile “We certainly don’t, thanks for the heads up…” you said, trailing off at the end, realising how it could’ve been offensive only after you had spoken. Richie gave you an amused look, “sorry…” 

He just laughed, “You’re probably the only living person I’d let make head-related jokes without retaliation,” he informed. “But don’t you dare tell anyone about it!” 

“I would never…” you said with a smile “Consider it our little tête-à-tête secret.” 

Richard chuckled, shaking his head as he did, you were certainly a funny one, no wonder the entire school was so fascinated with the new girl “Don’t push your luck…” 

You just smiled, and leaned your head to the side “Will you ever tell me the story of how it happened?” you asked, since you’d been rather curious about it, but knew most ghosts didn’t really enjoy talking about their last moments alive. 

“I told someone once a few hundreds of years ago, they finished what I started,” he said “But that’s a story for another day, all thought they remind me of you a little.” 

You raised an eyebrow with a small grin “Did you also let them make head puns?” 

Richard hummed and shook his head “Privilege is reserved for you sweetheart,” he said with a wink. 

“Don’t sweetheart me,” you retorted with a smile. 

“You don’t mind when Remus does it.” 

“Well that’s–“ 

“You’re wasting my time luv,” he said, waving his hand dismissively, “What do you need me to do?” 

“The headless hunt,” you said. He hummed. “I need you to talk to them, and convince them to help us out.” 

He tilted his head “Won’t be an easy feat.”

“That’s the reason I came to you Ricchie, I know you can be very convincing.” 

He hummed again, leaning back a little as he stared at you “And then what? I doubt the Slytherins would be much too scared by the headless hunt, most of them are pure-bIood wizards anyway.” 

You started explaining all the details of the plan to him, his grin grew wider as you went through the potions and charms you’d be using, “You could add some spider venom essence to increase the sensation of crawling skin,” he offered, it had you raise your eyebrows and turn to him with newfound interest, he smirked “I was brilliant in potions when I was alive, that’s how I ended up working with Olivanders, helped whim with the extraction of ingredients.” 

“So now I know who to bother when I need potion-related advice,” you teased. 

He chuckled “Don’t make it a habit,” he retorted “By the way, do you not have class now?”

You looked around to try and find a clock in the old room, but there was none “Shit… I– Do you happen to know the time?” 

He laughed, “I’m dеad, not all-knowing.” 

You rolled your eyes, but nodded, finally jumping off the table “Thanks for helping me out with this, and for showing me your secret little hideout, clearly no one has been here in years.” 

“They haven’t indeed, I used to bring Anne and Apollonia to hook up here,” he said with a shrug. 

“You brought me to your hook-up hiding spot?!” you asked with a gasp.

He chuckled “Why? You bothered?” 

You looked around, aside from the dust and spiderwebs, it seemed clean enough “No… Can I use it?” you said casually, turning back to him. 

He raised an eyebrow “Which of your boyfriends will you bring here?” he asked. 

“I’ve only got one of those,” you dеadpanned. 

He smirked, “You keep telling yourself that, little one.” 

You rolled your eyes “So.. Can I?” 

He shrugged, “Leave a sock by the door at least.” 

You scoffed, diverted “It’s not going to be to hook up! it’s a perfect hideout to plan things… or even to prepare potions…” 

“Oh you’re definitely bringing one of your boyfriends here,” he said “Just don’t forget the socks.” 

“I swear, one can’t have close friends these days without everyone assuming shit.” 

“Or maybe you’re just that oblivious,” he whispered as he started to leave through a wall. 

“Hey! Wait! how the hell do I get out?” you asked. 

“You’re clever enough to figure it out,” he said with a laugh before disappearing. Freakin Richie! He left you locked up in the damn hook-up room. You looked around, the walls were wrapped with large thick bookshelves and a couple hundred books and other trinkets. There was a cauldron near the corner, along with some crystal vases, and a small cupboard with what looked like dried potion ingredients. It really was the perfect place to brew the potions once you’d gotten the ingredients from Slughorn’s office. The only issue left was getting out of it. 

There was no door, or anything that resembled one either. There wasn’t another identical statue either, so leaving the exact same way you had gotten in, was not an option. You took a deep breath and continued to look around, analysing the entire place again. There were more and more books, everywhere you looked. Some of them were in fact potion books, and they had some of the library symbols, which meant either Richie or someone before him had been the one to take them there. You grabbed one of them and started flipping through the pages when something caught your eye, there was a small frog carved into the side of one of the bookshelves. 

You left the book on the table without sparing it a second glance and reached the bookshelf in two strides, leaning down, you realised that there was a section that you could press, you smiled, leaning into the wall to try and hear if there was anyone outside. When you were sure there wasn’t you took a deep breath, brazing yourself for what was to come. 

Finally, you pressed the head of the frog, in a matter of seconds you were outside, this time you managed to land on your knees and quickly pretended you were tying your shoelaces as you looked around, trying to make sure no one had seen you. When you were sure the coast was clear, you stood up, and turned to the clock at the end of the hallway. You were fucking late. 

You didn’t think twice, speed walking towards the Defence Against the Dark Arts Classroom. The door was open and lots of people were gathered around two long tables, you instantly knew what was happening, you knew the arrangement, you’d seen it before… in the duelling club.

You took a deep breath and waited till most people had turned around to sneak inside as fast as possible, you were walking straight towards the girls when you felt a hand on your shoulder “Lovely to see you decided to grace us with your presence darling,” you froze dеad in your tracks, that was Professor Nightshade's melodic voice.

You turned around with an apologetic smile, ignoring the pang on your arm as she accidentally brushed your shoulder wound. “I’m sorry Professor,” you said “I’ve been feeling a little off lately, I’m aware I’ve missed a couple of classes, and duelling club but I–”

“–don’t need to hear your explanations,” she said with a smile, you weren’t exactly sure if she was being kind or hostile about it “We were just about to start a new duel, we were looking for a second volunteer, would you care to do it?” Remus, who was standing a couple of metres behind tensed up, trying to give you a warning, but you didn’t notice, you were too enthralled by Nightshade’s stare. 

“Uhh… yeah sure,” you said as you dug your pockets to bring your wand out. Finally, you noticed Lily facepalming herself on the side which had you frown. You turned around, to look at the spot on the table to which you’d have to climb to, and you instantly knew why she had done it. 

On the other side of the long table, looking as pleased with himself as it gets, was Evan Rosier. You looked at him, keeping your expression as neutral as you could. And walked over to the table, Professor Nightshade elegantly offered you her hand so you could lean on it as you gave the rather tall jump, and you took it with a small smile, even if you were gritting your teeth as you got backlash from leaning on your wounded arm. 

Seraphina had no idea you were hurt, so even if she was hurting you she was doing it unwittingly. You saw James cringe as she grabbed onto your arm to help you up, but neither he nor anyone else could interfere. Once you were up there, you tightened your grip on your wand as you stared ahead. Last time you’d faced the boy he’d been in advantage, he had gotten you from behind, by surprise and he was a lot stronger than you were. That without even mentioning how it had been a 4 against one situation. 

This time it was different, there was no room to play dirty,  Nightshade was there and she wouldn’t allow it, you wouldn’t say you were particularly in advantage. Evan was a very talented wizard, you knew that much, but you were even, and that was enough for you to feel the adrenaline start pulsing through your veins. You’d get the chance to redeem yourself. You’d prove that you weren’t actually weak.  

“Backs to each other,” you heard Nightshade order, both you and Evan did as told, “I’ll count to five, and you’ll step away from each other that same amount of steps, when I’m done, you may turn around and start the duel, Understood?” 

You nodded and noticed from the corner of your eyes that Lily was gripping James’ arm with a nervous grip, the boy himself seemed tense, and you weren’t sure if it was because of the way Lily was clinging onto him or because he was just as worried for you as she was, probably both. 

“One,” NIghtshade said, both you and Evan gave a step in the opposite direction, you realised Peter had a tight grip on his own wand, and was darting his eyes rapidly between you and just behind you, he was looking at Evan, you realised. “Two.” You took another step. 

Remus could see Sirius tensing up, the boy was breathing slow and steady and had his eyes glued to Evan. He took a step towards his friend, and placed a hand over his shoulder, attempting to make it look like a friendly gesture as if not to call too much attention. Not that people were staring, no, they were all too busy staring at you and Evan. It’s not that the entire class knew of the rivalry between the two, but most people knew about the time you had hit Barty with the quaffle and they knew Barty and Evan were best friends. They had also seen your hostile behaviour towards each other, and with all the attention you were getting because of quidditch, you weren’t exactly one to blend in the back. 

Even if not everyone in the classroom knew how far the rivalry went, they knew the duel they were about to witness would be one to remember. Especially since both you and Evan, were just as talented in charms and Defense Against the Dark Arts as each other. Had Nightshade paid a little closer attention, and not believed Slughorn when he said that you were on friendly terms with each other and made a fantastic team, maybe she would have realised what a terrible idea this was.  

“Three,” She said, you both took another step, widening the distance between the other. You took a deep breath, tightening your grip around your wand, Evan was most likely going to go straight for an attack, so you’d have to be ready to block it, “Four,” she said, and you took another step, you could feel the tension building, the entire class was silent. So silent it was as if they were holding their breath. 

Remus felt Sirius inch forward and he instantly tightened his grip on the other boy’s shoulder. Inching closer so that his chest was almost touching Sirius’ back. While Remus was just as tense as your boyfriend, he also knew how much more impulsive Sirius was, so he started to rub soft circles with his thumb near the boy’s shoulder blade, “She can take him,” he whispered reassuringly, his eyes glued on you as he spoke. 

Another moment of silence and then “Five.”

In a matter of seconds both you and Evan were facing each other, “stupefy,” he spat. 

“Protego,” you said just before his spell reached you, casting a light blue force field around you that instantly blocked his spell. Once the two spells crashed against each other you spoke again “expelliarmus.” 

“Excellent wand work, the both of you,” Seraphina said “Pay attention to her shield charm, she cast it right before Evan’s spell reached her, which makes the spell even stronger.” 

While she spoke, you and Evan continued launching spells at each other, but you both had wicked-fast reflexes and managed to counter most of them, which meant you were both increasingly using stronger and more complex charms and jinxes to try and get to the other. 

“Serpensortia,” the blond said, you paused for a moment to look at him while a very big snake approached you, it was a very basic spell, and you weren’t sure why Evan would use something like that against you, perhaps it’s a Slytherin thing, you thought.

“Flipendo,” you said pointing towards the snake, effectively pushing it back towards the boy, the snake had flown so fast, that it fell right over his shoulders. He hissed and pushed it to the side, having it fall over the head of a couple of other students. 

“Keep the spells on the table!” Nightshade reprimanded as several students sprung back, trying to get out of the way.

You turned to the side and pointed your wand at the snake “deletrious,” you said, the snake rolled on itself and disappeared, but the little distraction had given Evan an advantage.

“Diffindo,” the boy spat, you ducked, but the curse got your cheek either way, causing a small slash on it. You heard some people hiss, Remus had to basically glue Sirius to his chest to warn him not to step in. He knew the teacher would reprimand him, but even worse, he knew you’d be pissed if anyone stepped in at that point. 

You touched your face, with your free hand, seeing the bIood on your fingers as you turned your wand back to him, or more precisely to a point in the ground near his feet, “reducto,” you said, causing a small explosion on the table that caused Evan to jump back, giving you enough time to get back your own footing. 

Evan seemed to panic as you got up and pointed his wand at you “Confringo!” he said, you somehow managed to block the spell. 

“Rosier!” Nightshade reprimanded “That’s not a spell we–” 

“-Avis!” you responded, causing a swarm of birds to fly in Evan’s direction.

“Miss (Y/L/N)!” She started as well, but neither of you was paying much attention to her words at that point. 

“Expulso!” he spat, the birds all exploded into thin air “Incarcerus!” You blocked. 

“Petrificus totalus!” you said, but he jumped to the side, “Incarcerus!” 

“Impedimenta!” This time, you both got each other. 

You were moving in slow motion as he fought with chains that wrapped around his feet and arms. “Fini…” This was going to take a while, you realised. Evan was working around the ropes pretty fast. “…te incantatem…” you managed to say and got back on your feet only seconds before he shot another jinx that you managed to counter by a hair. 

He pointed his wand at your face “Reducto!” 

You blocked and shot the same spell, he blocked, “stupefy!” He blocked. “Exoelliarmus!” he blocked. He was blocking everything, you’d need something stronger to get him even as he was blocking. “Confringo!” you spat again, but Evan had been distracted by Nightshade who was still trying to end the duel and it got him. You gasped as the boy was shot back by a fiery explosion. You’d been expecting him to block, so you weren’t measuring the strength of the spell. 

Evan barely managed to sit as he reached the floor and started trying to put the fire on his robes off. “Relashio,” you said, launching a good deal of water over him. You had already won, he was on the floor, not on the table anymore, but he was pissed, everything stung and on top of that you had made him look like a wet rat with your stupid water spell. 

Evan pointed his wand at you “Furnu-“ he started.

“Expeliarmus!” Nightshade interrupted, taking Evan’s hand away from his hand “That’s enough!” she said sternly “The two of you are way out of line!” You swallowed, still looking at her. “Diffindo?! Confringo?! Are you two out of your damned minds?!” 

“Evan was the first one to–“ 

“–Silence!” she uttered, you bit your tongue, “I’ll take Mr. Rosier to the infirmary,” she informed “But we’ll be having a talk after dinner Miss (Y/L/N), not only because of the duel,” she added, and then turned to the rest of people “Class is cancelled everyone, you may go back to your daily tasks.” She then dragged Evan out of the classroom. 

There was a series of whispers and people started leaving the classroom, you were still standing over the table, slightly frozen when Lily reached for your hand and helped you down, she took a look at you, placing both hands on the sides of your head to check the cheek that Evan’s spell had gotten cut. James was there, looking at it over Lily’s shoulder, and he winced as the girl moved your head to the side to give it a closer look. The rest of your friends were fast approaching, you still hadn’t said a word.  

Sirius came to you with a huge smile, Remus trailing close behind you “Starshine!” your boyfriend said, trying to get your attention. Since your head was still being held by Lily’s hands, you just focused your eyes on him, he had a huge grin on his face “That was incredible luv!” he started. You didn’t have much of a reaction. “The way that you–“ 

“–Sirius,” Remus said, calmly, trying to get the boys’ attention, he had somehow gotten just in front of the longer-haired boy in a matter of seconds. 

“And then how you–“ 

“Sirius,” he called again. The boy finally turned to him, and saw the way Remus shook his head slowly. Sirius frowned, not quite getting what Moony wanted to say.

“He didn’t block,” you muttered. 

“What was that luv?” Lily asked, the boys’ attention all on you now. 

“I– I was expecting him to block… I didn’t mean to…” 

Sirius frowned “What?! But after the things they did–“ 

“What did they do?” Beth, who had just gotten there, asked. 

Sirius swallowed. “They threw them off their brooms while they were broom surfing,” Remus intervened. 

“You went broom surfing again?” James asked, in shock, Lily almost kicked him in the shin, “Because I thought–“ 

“He’s in the infirmary because of me,” you muttered again. That was not the plan, that was not how you’d get back at them. 

Yeah, you almost died because of him, I’d say you’re even, Sirius thought, but he didn’t voice it, the rest of your friends were gathering around. 

“Should we put something on your–“ Lily started. 

You shook your head “I’m fine.” 

The girl nodded, understanding that you needed some space to process everything that had gone down, especially because of how fast it had been.

“We should go to the common room,” Remus voiced from beside you, and then leaned a little closer, placing one of his hands on your back, a soft reassuring smile “We still have the food you asked for earlier.”

You looked at him, eyes a little unfocused at first, but eventually you nodded.  You all walked back to the common room together. Sirius had taken your hand in his, to try and give a reassuring squeeze, even if he wasn’t quite sure why you were so perturbed, since he thought the way Evan had ended up was well deserved. He’d seen the marks of his fingers on your neck and jaw, he’d seen the sheer stress you had been put into when they matched you with him in potions, in fact, he’d go as far as to say confringo, hadn’t been enough, but that might just be the Black in him. 

Series Masterlist | Next Chapter

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A/N: So now we know exactly what they were looking at... Can we talk about those wolfstar interactions getting better and better? Gosh I love them so much I swear. Thoughts? Comments? What exactly could the prank be? Also, can you tell I really liked Richie from Hogwarts Legacy?

Raead more Marauders Fiction

[fantasyescapes17]

Patience (Part 1)

An elaborate charade- that is what your life has been for these past few years, and it has taken the help of more than one person to balance your delicate lies and secrets. Now entering your final season as an eligible young lady seeking wedded bliss, will you be able to keep up the act in order to achieve your dreams?

Genre: Choi Seungcheol x female!reader. Regency!AU (It's sort of Bridgerton-esque in the sense that I give zero attention to historical accuracy and prioritize aesthetics lmao) You are Jeonghan's sister so your last name is Yoon, but the reader has no other specific characteristics, physical or otherwise.

Word Count: 4.1k+

Part 2

Series Masterlist

"I'm afraid the upcoming season will be Miss Yoon's final opportunity to secure herself a decent husband," the obnoxious woman remarked. 

She did not seem embarrassed that the subject of her gossip (i.e, you) sat immediately across from her in the lavish parlour and well within earshot. She looked straight at you and silently dared you to respond to her callous comment. 

You did not indulge her. You merely sipped your tea. 

"Oh, surely not," her friend replied with a hint of embarrassment. "You mustn't say that, Mrs. Patty! Miss Yoon still has plenty of time before we can write her off as an old maid. She should be perfectly eligible for another two or three seasons, I dare say."

"She might have been, if not for that darling younger sister of hers. I believe little Miss Mina is eighteen now, and will be making her debut in society next season. Am I correct, Miss Yoon?" Mrs. Patty demanded of you. 

You couldn't ignore a question addressed directly to you. You placed your teacup on the table and nodded reluctantly. 

"Yes, Mother believes that my sister should be ready to debut next year," you replied softly. 

Miss Patty looked triumphant. "Well! There you have it! Anyone who has laid eyes on Miss Mina knows that she is the loveliest little creature and I am sure her paltry dowry will not prevent an eligible man from proposing to her. Miss Mina will be snatched up  instantly- and then what shall happen to our dear Miss Yoon? With her younger sister married before her, she won't have a chance!"

The other woman frowned. "Indeed, Miss Mina is uncommonly beautiful. She will have her pick of eligible men."

You rose from your seat abruptly. "Pardon me, ladies. I shall call for some more tea and cakes- we seem to be running short."

You exited the parlour before they had a chance to object, and cursed your mother for leaving you alone to handle the guests. Mother should have known that these infuriating women would show up the instant they heard that the Yoons had arrived in London for the season.

You turned towards the kitchens, hoping that the maids would not offer to help and make your journey redundant. Luckily, the servants were busy unpacking and carrying in your family's belongings. It had been a long journey from the countryside to your London abode- but a necessary one. The Yoon family could not absent themselves from the London season when they had two eligible members of marriageable age.

You turned the corner of the main hallway and came face to face with the other eligible Yoon. Your half-brother, Jeonghan. 

"Jeonghan!" you called out to him hopefully. "Are you going out? Will you take me with you?"

Jeonghan was in the process of lacing up his riding gear and stood to greet you. As your father's only son from his first marriage, Jeonghan became the heir to the entire Yoon estate upon your father's passing. 

"I'm afraid not, sister- I am going out riding with the Lees. You would be required to bring a chaperone," he replied slyly, reminding you, quite unnecessarily, that you could not be seen in public in the company of other single men without a female chaperone present. 

You sighed. "All right- but could you stop by the parlour room before you leave?"

"Why? So that Mrs. Patty may set up a meeting for me with her third niece? There are many things I would do for you, dear sister, but subjecting myself to Mrs. Patty is not among them," Jeonghan replied calmly as he continued to tie the straps of his riding gear. "I am sacrificing plenty for you already. I shall have my hands full at the Grisham's ball tomorrow."

You blinked. "What will happen at the Grisham's ball?"

"I have heard that a certain Mr. Hessington has expressed an interest in you. We shall have to take precautions to ensure he does not find the opportunity to express this interest in front of your mother."

"Oh dear. What does Hessington want?" you despaired. 

Jeonghan smirked. "He wants marriage. They all do. That is the purpose of this elaborate charade of having a season and attending all these social events, is it not? To find a suitable partner in  marriage?"

"Jeonghan, there is only one season left," you reminded him miserably. You reached for your brother's arm. "You must make sure nobody proposes to me this season. From next year everyone will focus on Mina and I will be forgotten- and once she is married then my prospects will be entirely extinguished. You must ensure nothing comes in the way of this."

Jeonghan sighed. "You must be the only woman in London who is actively trying to make herself less eligible for marriage."

"And I have been doing a wonderful job so far. Mrs. Patty said herself that I'm as good as an old maid next season if Mina gets engaged before me. And she surely will be. After that, they'll throw me aside with the old maids and governesses and widows."

"Six months more?"

You nodded eagerly. "Six months more. I will be in your debt forever, Jeonghan."

He sighed. "You certainly shall be. I've become nothing short of a villain in my step-mother's eyes since you persuaded me to tell her that I had reduced your dowry. She has most of the ton convinced that I am an evil brother stealing his sisters' rightful inheritance."

"But we had to do that. A large dowry would make me attractive to men looking to marry for a fortune," you reminded him. 

Jeonghan sighed. "I know. All the same, I've set aside your money. You and Mina will have your dowries once this charade is over. All of the dowry, I mean, not the paltry amount I told your mother you would receive."

You shook your head with a smile. 

"I don't need it."

"Don't refuse money when it's offered to you, good god, woman, have you lost your senses?" Jeonghan said lightly. He placed his hands on his hips and smiled back at you. "You seem more cheerful  than usual."

"We're almost at the end of this charade. Six more months," you replied excitedly. 

"Well, do try to look less cheerful. For all the ton knows, you're a woman with little dowry, no prospects, a prettier younger sister, and getting on in age. People will begin to wonder what you have to be so happy about."

You smiled to yourself. 

You had plenty to be happy about. And Mrs. Patty and the rest of the ton could choke on their tea and biscuits- they would never find out.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Your mother maintained a tight grip on your arm as she steered you around the corners of the large ballroom on the Grisham's summer estate. 

Your arm was beginning to feel numb.

"Now," your mother said firmly. "Don't you be discouraged by what Mrs. Patty says. You're a young woman of good breeding and though you're not nearly as charming as Mina, there's nothing wrong with you. Lesser women than you have secured wealthy husbands, do you understand?'

You resisted the urge to sigh. "Yes, mother."

"But you mustn't become lax about this. You need to consider what might happen to us if … if that boy Jeonghan decides to cast us out. You and your sister must marry well before that happens."

You turned to your mother in surprise. "Mother! Jeonghan would never do such a thing!"

Your mother had very little love for her stepson and she was not shy about admitting it. "Well, he's already stolen half your dowries, there's no knowing what he'll do next. We may be on the streets soon. Even sooner, if he decides to marry and his new wife decides to be rid of us. Your marriage is important."

You sighed. "Yes, mother."

"Now put on a smile and look a little more graceful."

You took a deep breath and straightened your shoulders. It was a delicate line you walked in social events such as these. You had to look dignified and well-mannered enough to satisfy your mother, but not so captivating that you captured the attention of any potential suitors. It only got easier with time. You were older and consequently less attractive than the young girls in the room, and the ton would certainly have heard the news of your reduced dowry. 

You tried not to make eye contact with any men as you quietly moved through the crowd like a wallflower. You were suddenly and abruptly met by a very tall man that appeared before you. 

"Miss Yoon. May I have the pleasure of the next dance?"

You breathed a sigh of relief as you recognised the man. He had a mischievous smile on his face. "Mr. Kim! Oh thank heavens, I was worried that it was an actual suitor."

Mr. Kim Mingyu had the decency to look offended as he took your hand and swept you skillfully towards the dance floor for a lively waltz. 

"Do you think that we would allow an actual suitor within ten feet of you? We've been doing this for three years now, Miss Yoon. We're professionals now, I dare say. There's one of us stationed in each section of the room and we are ready to intervene in case any man shows the slightest bit of  interest towards you."

You laughed. "Well, don't I feel well-protected."

"You are."

"I'm very sorry that you all have to spend your social gatherings watching out for me in this manner. Hopefully, this is the last season that this will be required," you apologised honestly. 

"Nonsense. I rather enjoy it," Mingyu chuckled. 

You shook your head. "I don't believe you. Surely you would rather save your dances for a woman in whom you have a genuine interest? I notice that the young lady in cerulean blue over there cannot keep her eyes away from us."

Mingyu cleared his throat and took a quick peek in the direction you nodded your head. "Ah. Well, that can't be helped. She's better off without me in any case, I've garnered a reputation as a rake. Dancing with me would only tarnish her prospects."

You raised an eyebrow. "Is that so?"

"Yes," he replied simply. 

"I suppose I cannot argue- being in the unique position of not caring about my own prospects makes me a poor judge. May I ask what you have done to have yourself labelled as a rake by the ton?" you enquired. 

Mingyu smiled. "Other than being naturally charming, rich and handsome?"

"I'm afraid those qualities make for an eligible bachelor, Mr. Kim, not a rake."

Mingyu merely chuckled without offering further explanation as the dance came to an end. He gracefully led you off to the side, where you were drawn into a conversation with some other co-conspirators- namely Mr. Lee Seokmin and Mr. Kwon Soonyoung. 

"Miss Yoon," was the cheerful greeting you received from a grinning Mr. Kwon. "I hope your quest to prevent all offers of matrimony fares well? I am pleased to report that the ton seems to be losing interest in you."

You smiled gratefully. "You bring glad tidings, Mr. Kwon. But I heard that Mr. Hessington…."

"Mr. Hessington is being informed of your reduced dowry and impending state of poverty at this very moment," Mr. Lee Seokmin reassured you. His eyes subtly darted towards the other end of the ballroom where your half-brother was in the middle of a conversation with Mr. Hessington himself. You could not hear what was being spoken, but there was no mistaking Mr. Hessington's alarmed expression at whatever Jeonghan said to him.  

"Delightful," you replied. 

"We have further pleasant tidings for you," Mr. Kwon continued. His hand slid into his waistcoat and he cast a furtive glance around before withdrawing something and slipping it surreptitiously into your hands. You tucked it away into the folds of your gown hastily- but not before ascertaining that it was a small envelope. 

Your eyes brightened in anticipation. "Could it be…"

"Indeed," Mr. Kwon replied with a large smile. "I was able to stop by a certain estate that shall remain unnamed on my way to London, and catch up with a dear friend of ours. He bid me to deliver a letter by hand that he dared not risk sending by post, lest it be intercepted by unwelcome parties. It will be safe, I trust, in your possession?” 

You couldn’t hold back your smile. “Very safe, indeed.”

“I certainly hope so, because your mother approaches us and she looks rather red in the face.”

Your plans to sneak away to a quiet corner and read your letter were thwarted instantly by the approach of your mother. She was flushed and huffing, although she attempted to calm herself when she noticed that you were in the company of Mr. Kwon and Mr. Lee- while they were not the most eligible bachelors in the room, they were eligible and rich enough for your mother to greet them with her politest smile.  

“Mr. Kwon, Mr. Lee. What a pleasure to see you in London,” she tittered.  “I do hope you will find the time to call on us for tea later this week."

They both greeted her politely and accepted her invitation with the usual graces, before your mother took hold of your arm and steered you away from them. 

"Is everything all right, mother?" you asked, concerned. 

"All right? I have just heard- the most terrible news- Mr. Hessington had expressed an interest in courting you but that odious brother of yours has gone and told him about your dowry! I have half a mind to expose that conniving little man for what he is- a thief, a monster-"

"Mother, you must calm down," you insisted gently. "There must be some misunderstanding-"

Your mother was distraught. "Oh, what shall we do? If you are not married this season- we shall be left on the streets unless Mina marries exceedingly well but if that boy Jeonghan continues to ruin her prospects as well-"

"Nobody could ruin Mina's prospects. She is the sweetest, prettiest creature and you know everyone will fall in love with her when she comes into society. Perhaps we should accept that my time is coming to an end, mother…."

"No! No, you cannot give up, my dear. We shall find you a husband this season!"

You sighed. "Yes, mother-"

"Go, go back to Mr. Kwon and Mr. Lee- perhaps one of them will ask you to dance, they seem like nice young gentlemen and the evening is not yet over…"

You extricated yourself from your mother- but instead of returning to company, you slid along the length of the ballroom until you succeeded in finding a remote and private corner behind a table of refreshments and some heavy curtains. You eagerly pulled out the small envelope Soonyoung had given you and unfolded its contents as your heart swelled in anticipation. 

My love,

It has been too long since we last spoke. I hope you and your family are well. Although I have met your brother a few times this year and heard news of you from him, it saddens me that you must always be so far away from me. 

I will be travelling to London on business next week- I may not be able to stay the entire season, as you know well, but may I be so bold as to ask for a glimpse of your beautiful smile while I am in the city? I would be honoured if you would grant me a dance at Almack's on Thursday night. But do not put yourself to trouble, my love- if the thought of meeting me in public makes you uneasy or if your feelings for me have changed during our separation, know that I would never resent you. I desire nothing more than your happiness and well-being. 

Forever yours

S. 

Your heart danced wildly as you tucked the contents back into the folds of your dress. It had been too long since you had received a letter from Seungcheol- a few close calls with your nosy mother intercepting your mail had made it too dangerous for him to write to you by normal post. 

But to finally see him again after so many months apart! And on Thursday, so soon! You had to turn your face to the wall to hide your giddy smile. Three years of a secret, clandestine courtship had not diminished your adoration of the man in the slightest. You still felt as strongly for Mr. Choi Seungcheol as you had the very first time he smiled at you with his bright smile and took your hand in his gentle grasp for your very first dance, so many years ago. 

You took a moment to compose yourself (it would not be appropriate to be seen looking so giddy) and slipped out of your corner. Your brother had been poking around at the refreshment table and he approached you when he saw you- Jeonghan's expression was grim. 

"I think I shall avoid dining at home for the time being," Jeonghan told you drily. "I fear my step-mother may really intend to poison me for what I have done tonight."

You sighed. You were not ignorant of how much Jeonghan had sacrificed for your sake. "I am sorry for the trouble I have put you through because of all this, Jeonghan. I will try to calm my mother."

His eyes softened. "I don't require an apology from you, sister."

"Gratitude, then?" you offered gently. 

"If you could keep your mother away from any sharp objects or poisonous substances, that should be sufficient recompense for now," he replied with a chuckle. "So. I heard from Mr. Kwon that a certain Mr. Choi will be in London in a few days."

You bit back a smile. "Yes."

Jeonghan patted you on the arm gently. "I am glad you will have a chance to see him. Perhaps we can arrange to have your mother occupied elsewhere for the evening…"

You shook your head. "I will handle mother myself, Jeonghan," you reassured him. "You have done plenty. "

Jeonghan looked contemplative for a moment. "I sincerely hope you and Seungcheol can be happy together soon, sister. I would not have put my own reputation at stake if I did not hold his character- and yours-  in the highest regard."

You smiled. A genuine compliment from Jeonghan was rare, and that made it all the more precious. You squeezed his hand on your arm. 

"Thank you, brother."

"Now- let us walk away quickly. I see Mrs. Patty approaches and she has that idiotic niece of hers right behind her…"

—----------------------------------------------------

The days trickled past slowly and painfully until Thursday evening finally arrived. Through your own clever manipulations, you had persuaded your mother to attend a card party being held by Mrs. Patty and to allow you to attend Almack's alone chaperoned by Viscountess Hong- one of the few married young women that your mother could be persuaded to entrust you with. 

"I hope, Viscountess, that you will recommend my daughter to some of your acquaintances," your mother pressed. "You have done so well for yourself. I hope you can be a positive influence on her."

Viscountess Hong smiled. She had not been married long; her husband, Viscount Joshua Hong, had been renowned as one of the most eligible bachelors in London not long ago. It did not come as a surprise to anyone when their marriage was announced in the papers, however. The gossip-minded members of the ton had long known that Viscount Hong was smitten with a young lady of humble origins. 

Your mother admired any woman who could achieve the difficult task of marrying above her station. 

"I will be a responsible and careful chaperone, Mrs. Yoon. You may rest assured that I will take excellent care of your daughter for the evening," the Viscountess promised. 

Your mother waved you off and you could not help the butterflies that erupted in your stomach as you climbed into the Hongs' carriage. Viscount Hong was waiting outside and greeted you in his usual kind and pleasant manner. 

You thanked him nervously. "I'm very grateful for your invitation. I was worried that my mother would not be persuaded to let me visit Almack’s tonight without a female  chaperone."

Viscountess Hong took your hand warmly. "Of course, we would never allow that! I’ve had the pleasure of seeing Seungcheol often this past year, and the man never smiles quite as brightly as when someone mentions your name. I'm afraid the man is quite devoted to you, Miss Yoon."

You felt shy, and bit your lip. "I-I do care for him a great deal."

Viscountess Hong beamed.

It was a pleasant carriage ride to Almack's- the Hongs kept you engaged in conversation and their friendly presence helped calm your nerves. As Viscountess Hong told you about the day she first met her husband, your mind drifted back to your own fateful introduction to Mr. Choi Seungcheol four years ago. 

—------------------------------------

The estate was magnificent. 

"Oh! A marble fountain! It is so beautiful!" your younger sister Mina cried out in delight at the sight of the immaculate gardens and the enormous white fountain that towered in the centre, gently spouting water. 

Your mother (despite being notoriously difficult to impress) also looked at the enormous estate and manor appreciatively. "Indeed, this estate is quite lovely. Perhaps we should plant some flowers like those back home. You say this manor belongs to Mr. Choi?" she asked your brother. 

Jeonghan nodded. "Yes- Mr. Choi Seungcheol was a close friend of mine at Oxford. His father passed away two years ago and he inherited the estate. He was more than happy to invite us all to stay at the manor while I take care of some business here in Derbyshire.  The weather is lovely here this time of year."

"Very generous," your mother remarked thoughtfully as a servant unloaded the marriage behind you. "And… is there a Mrs. Choi?"

Jeonghan smiled tightly. "There was. she passed away in childbirth four years ago."

"He is a widower, then. And has a child," your mother remarked, displeased. 

Jeonghan nodded. "Yes."

"Pity," your mother whispered to you, as she took your arm and walked towards the manor out of Jeonghan's earshot. "I was almost beginning to imagine you being mistress of this lovely estate. But you may find a way to have a marble fountain without having to marry a widower."

You blinked at your mother in surprise. It was no secret that she had not been your father's first wife. 

"But you married a widower," you said, surprised. 

Your mother shot you a sharp look. 

"Exactly, my dear."

Before you could question her further on this hypocritical viewpoint, the entrance to the manor burst open. Servants emerged to unload your carriage and carry your things inside. They were followed by a tall, well-dressed man with a handsome smile that you barely managed to glimpse before your view was blocked by your brother stepping into your path. 

“Seungcheol!” 

The two men shook hands warmly, and you could see from Jeonghan’s unusually relaxed manner that he carried a great deal of affection and trust for Mr. Choi. They exchanged greetings for a moment, before Jeonghan finally stepped aside and allowed you to feast your eyes on Mr. Choi properly. 

“Seungcheol- allow me to introduce you to my family. My father’s wife, Mrs. Yoon- and my two sisters, Miss Yoon and Miss Mina.” 

You curtsied without taking your eyes off the startlingly handsome man. Seungcheol bowed politely in return. His manner was calm and suited a respectable and confident man- but there was something in his large eyes that sparkled with liveliness and joy. You had seen handsome men before- Jeonghan often had friends over for dinner and you had spent time in society. 

But no man had ever made you feel quite so giddy. 

“We are very grateful for your hospitality, Mr. Choi,” your mother said performatively. “Your estate is lovely. My daughters and I were just discussing how delightful that marble fountain is.” 

Seungcheol smiled and glanced at the fountain. “Ah- yes, that was my own personal selection. I am rather fond of it myself. And allow me to say, madam, that it is a pleasure to be host to you and your lovely daughters. Your arrival has been long-awaited- not only by myself but by certain other members of my household.” 

It was only then that you finally tore your eyes away from Mr. Choi’s smile and noticed that another person stood behind him. A small, dark-haired boy of no more than four years old with the same bright eyes as Mr. Choi was clinging shyly to his father’s legs. 

“Allow me to introduce my son- Jiwoo.” 

-------------------------

A/N: So this is my first time posting for Seventeen! I used to have a moderately successful fanfiction blog for a different kpop group on here a few years ago but I took a break and just wanted to start afresh since Seventeen is the only group I keep up with these days, and I miss writing.

I mostly plan to write some fantasy AUs over the next couple months (got some more regency, royal and other fantasy ideas brewing) so we'll see how it goes.

[extremely-judgemental]

Long Post

I’m starting to feel people don’t understand what espionage truly means. I recently came across this post that said Tamlin was never a double agent and was only playing the good guy to save himself, and there was a list supporting the claim. So, here we go.

Fair warning: this is needlessly elaborate, includes many tangents and requires thinking from perspectives outside of the explicit narrative.

Before we begin, let’s get one thing clear, just because Night flaunts Azriel as their spymaster, it doesn’t mean that’s how spies operate. Revealing their identity risks compromising future missions and the people close to them. IRL spies lead double lives for decades for this very reason and only a select few are trusted with the knowledge depending on who they report to or who serve as their getaway.

‘Even Lucien was in the dark.’ Dagdan and Brannagh are daemati. Involving more people in the plan means more sources for the twins to exploit and more possible leverage for Hybern. Lucien could be held captive or threatened with death to force Tamlin into furthering the war. Their friendship was taken advantage of by Amarantha twice before. It isn’t a matter of trust but of protection, the way Feyre isn’t involved either. Besides, if Tamlin is compromised and found plotting against Hybern, the first step would be to check Lucien’s mind, leaving with no one in power left to protect Spring.

‘Tamlin let Hybern settle in Spring.’ Tamlin grants access to a troop to survey the Wall, which is different from allowing a whole army into his territory. With his defences intact, he still has the upper hand. Managing and controlling the movements of a troop within his borders is much easier than stopping an army, which is exactly what Lucien does—accompanying Jurian and the twins to the Wall. It is after Feyre destroys Spring that they are left vulnerable, allowing the rest of the Hybern’s army camp there. Moreover, denying access to his lands would be suspicious, not letting them inspect the Wall would be suspicious. It is part of the act, playing a willing participant in upholding his end of the deal.

‘Tamlin didn’t warn the other courts.’ After Amarantha’s reign, while the other High Lords are rebuilding their courts and making allies, Tamlin is invested in freeing Feyre from her bargain. Among the six courts, one is Spring’s enemy for harbouring Lucien, one steals Feyre every month, and two are fairly new High Lords Tamlin doesn’t know. And if Night’s visit to Summer is common knowledge, Tarquin ‘allows’ Rhysand to parade Feyre again after witnessing everything Under the Mountain. Clearly, Tamlin doesn’t know who to trust.

Considering he chooses to warn them, a ‘Hey, Hybern is coming for us all’ isn’t useful enough when it’s already expected after Amarantha’s reign. In fact, it would have encouraged Hybern to act before the courts could recuperate or even unleash the Cauldron in whatever capacity. This is evidenced by the attack on Velaris when they attempted to gain the mortal Queens on their side. Hybern has been amassing armies for years, centuries even. In order to win, Prythian needs more than a ‘warning’ which Tamlin manages to obtain.

Moreover, the battle of Adriata occurs right after Feyre returns to Night (iirc a week or two). Since Spring is in tatters, Tamlin isn’t in a position to help anyone, especially as Hybern attacks from the seas and not Spring lands. Also, his emissary, Lucien, and every other powerful player on his side are removed from the board.

Besides, who would believe his words when not long ago he was running around like a depraved lunatic to save the woman he loves, and none of them cared? Who would believe it’s more than his paranoia or even a ploy to get her back without concrete proof?

‘Spring was already broken.’ From the beginning, it is clear that Tamlin has his people’s loyalty. His sentries beg to be sacrificed to free him from the curse. When the lands grow dangerous with not many left to defend it, the people flee. After the curse is broken, they all return—one of them being Alis. Despite the reduced population, with Amarantha’s cronies still at large and creatures roaming wild, Spring is recovering and the people are happy. Feyre herself notes how content they are to be in Tamlin’s presence.

When Feyre is kidnapped, Tamlin kills the sentries on guard, which is meant to turn everyone against him. But it’s not that simple. Feyre would have officially become Lady of Spring if she weren’t ‘stolen’ during the wedding. The sentries are entrusted to protect their Lady—whom they love and respect. They are aware of the bargain. They are aware Feyre was killed once. They are aware Feyre is a target—as an asset or Tamlin’s weakness. It is under their watch that she is taken from their home. When they couldn’t even stop his third-in-command from walking in, disarming everyone, and carrying Feyre away, how are they expected to protect her from the most powerful High Lord of Prythian?

And, Rhysand is not just an enemy of Tamlin. He has been the villain of Prythian for five centuries and possesses powers to twist someone’s mind. One outburst from Tamlin isn’t enough to make him a monster in the eyes of his sentries when Feyre is now Rhysand’s hostage. The people didn’t abandon Spring when Tamlin made a deal with Hybern because they knew there was no one to help them.

Everything that happens after Tamlin, Feyre and Lucien return from Hybern’s castle is a calculated move. Feyre admits that it is her goal to destroy everything Tamlin has, including his court and people. She never opens up about how she’s treated in Night, even during the one-week stays. Later, she accuses Rhysand of raping her over the past months and tricking her with the fake mating bond. She even takes the dramatic route with ‘if you peer into the darkness long enough, the darkness peers back’ (paraphrased) saying this to Lucien. There is no reason for anyone to doubt Tamlin’s actions when Feyre proves every one of their fears true.

Feyre doesn’t stop there. She exploits the people’s faith in her and manipulates them. During the Summer Solstice, she positions herself as more valuable and blessed than the people already claim her to be. With these new beliefs she creates, she becomes a bigger prize for the likes of Rhysand, Beron, and even Hybern. She constantly interrupts the conversations and corners Tamlin into decisions that are less than ideal, which he complies with to put on a united front. She exploits Tamlin’s trauma, abuses him, and pushes him to a breakdown in order to play his victim. She knows of Ianthe’s plans and lets the nagas attack using that to her advantage.

The lashings are pivotal in revealing who Tamlin is to the people, but there is a flaw in the narrative. Feyre was stolen from the mansion more than once. Rhysand and Morrigan proved that the mansion is not safe enough. Now, it is not even guarded against a few nagas and the sentry loses the keys after falling asleep? This is a question of their competence and loyalty. Even then, Tamlin waits till the morning to execute the punishment and Feyre controls the sentry’s memories until the very last minute, ensuring Tamlin has little chance to back out. She twists the scenario as Tamlin’s cruelty, when it is a High Lord’s home breached and their enemies are on their lands. Feyre exploits Tamlin’s fears, pushing him to take drastic measures and playing the saint who expected him to prove his goodness. If she cared so much about the sentry, why didn’t she force Ianthe to confess? Ultimately, she goes as far as manipulating them into believing that Tamlin let the twins hunt her. She breaks their trust in their High Lord. Everything Feyre does or says is a lie until Tamlin cracks (if you want to draw parallels, it’s exactly what Rhysand claims to have done Under the Mountain).

This is often ignored or used as proof of Tamlin’s failings. But, Alis leaves Spring because she knows that Hybern is not the only threat. Though she doesn’t hate or blame Feyre, she understands that soon Spring will fall because of her and Night.

So no, Spring was not broken. It was more put together than Night, where Rhysand has to threaten one half of his army and buy the loyalty of the other with false promises. Spring is loyal to their High Lord and their court until Feyre manipulates them. She admits to ‘priming Spring to fall’ and ‘baiting Tamlin’. She even wants to take over Spring with Night’s army after she destroys it. She is the reason for their downfall, not Tamlin, who is stuck in a no-win situation with everyone working against him—Ianthe, Feyre, Hybern, and even Lucien after a point.

The real question: Why is Night not held accountable for Hybern’s invasion, but Tamlin is?

Rhysand is aware of Hybern’s movements long before Tamlin makes the deal. He doesn’t trust other courts or warn them or ally with them—exactly what Tamlin is condemned for. Rhysand betrays Summer by stealing their most valuable relic and weapon. It’s only after he fails that he reaches out to other courts for support. In fact, his failure fast-tracks the war—Hybern was counting on Inner Circle’s martyr complex which they all played right to the T.

Even forgiving all this as good intentions, they still keep everything under wraps. None of the courts are warned, including Summer and Autumn, who share their borders with Spring, which Hybern is taking over first. For two months, all they do is wait for Feyre. For two months, they don’t attempt to unite other courts to stop Hybern or make Feyre’s escape easy. They don’t even rally their Illyrian and Darkbringer armies until Feyre arrives. They have the best spymaster and the best network of spies, but they also have the habit of always pulling his sources out at crucial times. They have the most powerful daemati who never uses his powers to find who his potential comrades are but has no problem invading minds to assert his dominance. In the two months, Night comes to the tough decision to hold a High Lords meeting after Feyre returns.

Besides, Feyre claims to spy in Spring but finds nothing useful about Hybern’s plans, which is proved in the meeting. Feyre is a High Lady who can’t keep her emotions in check and destroys the one court that shields the mortal lands from the rest of Prythian, leaving both sides vulnerable to Hybern. Tamlin could have stalled the infiltration with his army, exchanged information with the twins or Jurian, or negotiated his people’s safety in exchange for more access to his lands which would have been the strategic move here. But Feyre undermines every single leverage Spring has in this situation.

Tamlin siding with Hybern is similar to Rhysand working for Amarantha. No one knows of his intentions until the very end either. There’s no proof Rhysand was in favour of Prythian. He is the one who told Amarantha about the human girl in Spring only days before they ran out of time to break the curse. He is the reason Tamlin sends Feyre back to the mortal lands. He is the reason Feyre is abused, tortured, and killed Under the Mountain. None of his actions support his words. Then, why is it hard to believe Tamlin who delivers what he promised? He keeps his cover until Feyre is in danger again. He brings Beron’s forces to join the war. If he was merely playing a hero, he didn’t have to do any of this. Tamlin was a double agent and he did a better job than Feyre, who managed to notify her Inner Circle about the twins she killed anyway.

See, the issue is not with the character but the structure of the plot. Did SJM plan it thoroughly? No. Was it executed well? No, there isn’t enough foreshadowing to convince the readers. Despite this, it still works to some extent because Feyre is an unreliable narrator. When she arrives in Spring, she is determined to ruin Tamlin’s life and expose him as a monster. She nitpicks every one of his choices, words, and actions. She glosses over his good deeds and reassures herself that they are his manipulative tactics. Even if Tamlin laid his plans out to her, she wouldn’t believe it—that’s how far she is in her rage and vengeance.

The entire espionage arc doesn’t exist to redeem Tamlin, but it is a device for Rhysand and Feyre to magically have everything they need. Tamlin is not a character SJM cares about. He is a villain and will always remain a villain. Had it been someone she wanted to redeem, there would be a 12-page monologue in the High Lords meeting with tears and a sob story.

None of this is favouring one point of view over the other, but it’s important to consider the mentality of other characters in such situations instead of believing every word from the chosen narrator. This is a major problem in this fandom where readers take Feyre and Rhysand’s views at face value and treat it as absolute truth when the situation is much more complex. SJM doesn’t respect her readers’ intelligence and writes with complete abandon. As long as you lap up whatever she offers and glorify her books, she has no reason to write a better story. Instead of hating on the characters like Tamlin, maybe you should be questioning the writer for such an unconvincing and subpar plot.

[lucid-loves]

Taste Like Venom ~ Simon "Ghost" Riley Part 3

Pairing: Ghost x assassin!reader (fem!reader, no use of y/n, callsign “Hex”)

Word Count: 3.7k

CW: angst, violence, blood, strong language, scars, enemies to friends to lovers trope, slow burn, fluff, clear attraction and sexual tension, smut later on, reader POV and ghost POV, minors dni, Soap lives in this AU

Let me know if I missed any CWs.

Story Synopsis: After Makarov gets away once again, Laswell decides to force a favor from you, the world’s greatest assassin and best-kept secret. You are now expected to help the 141 with taking down Makarov in addition to playing nice with them. It’s hard to play nice when you have always worked alone. It doesn’t help that one of the team members, Ghost, gets curious about you in each interaction. 

Chapter Synopsis: The great 141 road trip is fine in the beginning, but being on the road for eleven hours clearly gets to everyone, especially you. For once, Ghost tries to show you some genuine compassion without any ulterior motives. 

A/N: Thought that this would not only be a fun part to write, but also a breather to get to develop more character dynamics. Feel free to comment what you think each member of the 141 favorite music genre is! Including your own~

Part 1 ~ Part 2 ~ Part 3 ~ Part 4 ~ Part 5 ~ Part 6 ~ Part 7 ~ Part 8 ~ Part 9 ~ Part 10

Such a long drive was new territory for the boys. They were so used to helicopter rides, armored cars, and jets to take them where they needed to go fast. For their size and stature, the minivan was cramped, slightly rough on the road, and just plain weird. It took a few seat adjustments before everyone was as comfortable as they could be. Save for Gaz. He just prayed that a pit stop was coming soon and someone would be willing to switch seats with him.

For the first hour, the ride was noisy with conversation. Conversation that tried to reel you in. Price, looking through the front windshield, asked you a question. “How do you know where you’re going, Hex?”

“I’ve spent time memorizing road maps around the area. We’re taking a back road. A scenic route. Any other cars on the road would further see this minivan as a family road trip through the country.” You elaborated, your eyes steady on the road ahead. There were a lot of twists and turns on this route, but you knew that it would pay out in the end.

“Hidden in plain sight.” Soap added, his tone showing that he was a bit impressed with the logic of it all. Perhaps you knew what you were doing after all. Without you meaning to or doing anything extraordinary, the group was slowly starting to trust you and your judgment as evidenced by your creative planning. You were becoming quite the leader as well. But, you weren’t completely out of the woods yet. They still kept some of their guards up, just in case.

“There’s a method to the madness. Don’t underestimate the power of assumptions.” You advised, a word of advice that would hopefully stick with them after all of this was over. If they listened, perhaps some problems the world was facing could actually be solved. 

Soap pulled out his phone with the intention of making this trip more enjoyable. Making sure that his VPN you required was turned on, he began to browse through songs using his music app. Once he added his favorite songs, he passed it to his captain. “Whatever you want, Cap. No genre limits.”

Price took the phone and rubbed his chin for a second in thought, his brick-brown beard moving with his fingers. Eventually, he added some songs to the playlist. Once he was satisfied, he passed the phone to Gaz who lit up at the idea. “Now it’s gonna feel like a real road trip!”

A few more songs were added before the phone was passed all the way up to Ghost. Hesitantly, Ghost added his own favorite songs. His teammates knew him decently well. They’re even seen his face before under the mask. However, there were still things they were learning about when it came to his personal life. One of which was his favorite kind of music. Thankfully, he was willing to share that information, trusting his team more and more with each passing day. 

He looked at you when he was done, wondering if he should even offer. Having watched the interactions from the mirror, you decided to stay out of it. When Ghost was done, you just shook your head for a silent “no.” Simon imagined that you were rejecting the idea in your mind based on the warning look you gave him. Don’t even try. That made him really wonder what kind of music you liked. The records back home were incredibly diverse. But what was your favorite? Jazz? Metal?

The phone was passed back to Soap. It was quite a diverse playlist. He didn’t realize that his team had such different tastes, but it just made him excited to give it a listen. He connected it to the car’s bluetooth and hit the shuffle button. Ghost went ahead and switched the car to bluetooth mode for him. Almost immediately, the car filled up with music, starting with one of Price’s songs. 

Instead of tuning out, you tuned in. Very much so. Small details, even favorite songs, could say a lot about a person. You were learning about the men now. Not for the sake of potential friendship, no. For the sake of information for potential future manipulation if things went sideways. You always prepared for the worst, even when times seemed like the best. 

The discussion carried forward, now with the ease of real music in the background. Gaz decided to take the plunge and ask you a question. “So. . . Hex. . . You lived a long time out in the woods. How did you survive on your own? There doesn’t seem to be a grocery store for miles around.”

You adjusted your sitting position, trying to get comfier in the driver’s seat. If you were going to deal with this for most of the trip, you might as well get as comfortable as you can. You answered, one hand on the wheel and one arm resting near the window. “I have an acquaintance who’s a farmer that gives me whatever I need. In return, I pleasure his wife, which helps save their marriage.”

His eyes got huge, not expecting the answer. He nearly tripped over his words. “Really?!”

“No, Kyle. You really think I would do such a thing?” You scowled. Internally, though, you were cracking up at his bewilderment. Soap and Price began chuckling in their seats. Even Simon was cracking a smile that no one could see. Kyle’s embarrassed blush that matched the falling red leaves outside made them even more amused. Who knew you had a sense of humor? A crude sense at that. 

He muttered an apology. At least he was a good sport about it. A part of him found it quite funny too. After the chuckles died down, you answered his question truthfully. “Kate does supply drops for me. Not all the time, just when I need more meat than the woods can provide. Everything else I grow.”

It was an answer that made sense and didn’t reveal much about yourself. Nothing too fascinating about it. At least, to everyone save for Ghost. He took note of your truth, pictured you growing fruits and vegetables, hands in the dirt and sweat dripping down your temple. He imagined you hunting too. A heavy rifle and camo. Patience, aim, fire. He thought that some of the foods he had from your kitchen tasted a little gamey. 

“Didn’t you ever get lonely being out there all by yourself?” Soap inquired, not afraid to ask the question that was on everyone’s mind. All eyes were on you as you took a deep breath.

“No, Johnny. Never.”

This was partially a lie as well as partially the truth. There were times where you did feel alone. Like the only human left on the planet. Kate’s calls every now and then help curb it a little, but it wasn’t the same as actually being in the same space with someone physically. Yet, when you were surrounded by people on a classified mission or watching disaster after disaster on TV, it made you glad that you weren’t a part of any of it. The flurry of different emotions coming from all different sides when with civilization was often too much for you. You needed control. More control than what you could usually get when you were on the outside again.

Simon was watching you carefully now, trying to pick up any indication of a cracked resolve. A twitch, a change in breathing, anything to read into further. There was no way you never felt lonely. Yet, you said it with such conviction that it startled everyone. Ghost just couldn’t believe you.

Having killed the conversation, the boy awkwardly tried to change topics. Now excluding you. Good. You preferred it this way.

~

A few hours in and the car was quiet. Light, easy music played now from the car speakers as everyone took a nap. Except for Ghost, of course. Fortunately, he did keep himself occupied by reading the book you lent him. The first couple of chapters were a miss in his opinion. After a couple more, it started to get good. It didn’t take him long to actually get invested in the story, reading between the lines as you had done when you read. You had good tastes.

Enjoying the quietness of the trip was something you didn’t think you would be able to do. Especially with Simon in the front. Surprisingly, he was being good which you hoped would like for the rest of the trip. Unfortunately, you jinxed it in your head. Out of the corner of your eye, he bookmarked his spot and took a break. Now, he wanted to talk to you.

“You didn’t play your own music.” 

“So?” You shrugged, wondering where he was going with this. Nothing good probably.

“Why not?” He simply asked, himself not knowing what the big deal was. It was just music. You could have even lied. Picked out music you hated. Instead, you just opted out, not even willing to risk three minutes of any particular melody.

You suppressed an annoyed groan. Not this shit again. “What part of ‘leave me alone’ do you not understand, Simon?”

There you go again, saying his name with such disrespectful ease. It still made his heart beat faster hearing it from you. It still made his muscles tense in vexation as well. You noticed this from how the grip on his arms got tighter, his arms crossing his chest. “How much could music taste actually reveal about you as an individual?”

“A lot! God damn it, when are you going to drop this stupid shit? Quit playing your stupid fucking game?!” You spat, trying to keep your cursing at a low volume lest you wake up the rest of the team. Your knuckles were turning white with how hard you were gripping the steering wheel, desperately trying to keep your cool.

However, he didn’t drop it. He didn’t want to, so he wouldn’t. Simon could be just as stubborn as you which made you want to punch him. Have his teeth fall out of his mouth and get caught in his skull mask. “You mean to tell me that you’ve learned a lot about us based on our favorite songs alone? That’s just ridiculous, Hex.”

He could use your name as a curse too. Anything to get you to keep talking to him. Anything to keep your attention. To figure you out. As much as you didn’t want to give him what you wanted, you did anyway out of sheer aggravation. “It’s called Music Psychology, you fucking ass! Do they do anything besides tell you what to shoot in that god forsaken military?! Do they really keep you all fucking braindead?!”

“Watch your mouth, Hex! You don’t want to say anything you don’t mean.” Simon warned, his voice low like a bass about to snap its strings. He had to remind himself that you weren’t like them when it came to combat approach to cool down. The 141 employed leadership, strength, swift execution. An assassin like you employed other values, one being the art of psychology apparently. 

He wasn’t going to let you badmouth his team and those back home that don’t deserve your slander, though. Many people back home were plenty capable with their own skill sets. It wasn’t fair to put them all in one box just because they followed the orders of the government.

“Watch my mouth?! Have you even heard the shit that’s coming out of yours?! Or is your head so far stuck up your own ass that you can’t hear what you say?” You antagonized further, making the situation worse with each passing insult.

“Why are you so fucking defensive?! You cracked a joke earlier, but now asking about your music tastes is too much? You don’t make any fucking sense, Hex. What the hell are you so afraid of?” His own voice was rising with volume as he spiraled out of control as well.

You were practically yelling at this point like the rest of the world didn’t exist except for you and Simon. A personal bubble where you could really try to rip him a new one. You didn’t hold back. “I’m not afraid of anything, Ghost! I just want you to leave me the fuck alone! Why are you so desperate to know me?!

“You’re part of this team, whether you like it or not!  Whether you want to be an enemy or not! Part of that is trusting us with your life. All of it!” He argued, trapping himself in this conflict bubble with you.

Your temper was boiling over to the point you could cry. Why was he doing this to you? Why couldn’t he just let this go? “Why can’t you understand that I am never going to be part of your team?! I never can and I never will!”

At that he paused. There was something about your last retort. Never can? It was oddly specific. What did that mean?

Just then, the light for gas lit up on the dashboard. You clenched your jaw, cursing more profanities that would have anyone blush. A couple miles down was a gas station. A wave of relief washed over you. Now you had an excuse to exit the car to get away from Simon.

You didn’t realize it before with how provoked you were, but the 141 in the back was awake and clearly heard the two of you bickering. The tension thick enough to choke on made it hard for them to interfere. This pit stop would hopefully let things settle down again.

As soon as the car was parked near an empty pump, the doors slid open to let the men out. It felt good to stretch their legs and breathe in some fresh air. It was about time Gaz was relieved of the back seat too. Price, Soap, and Gaz headed into the convenience store for a moment to pick up drinks and snacks, something that was essential for their road trip experience. You leaned against the car, waiting for the gas pump to finish. The entire time, Ghost sat silently in the front doing his own breathing exercises to get his temper under control. God, you were venomous. Troublesome, irritating, infernal, a million other words. Yet, you were beautiful when you were pissed. He couldn’t understand it.

Finally, the car was loaded up once again, now complete with drinks, snacks, and a full tank of gas. The seating arrangements changed, Price now in the back to allow Gaz a chance to let his legs stretch out more. Besides that, he didn’t really want to be up front with all of the conflict. He would normally break it up, but he still didn’t know enough about you to feel comfortable doing so. It was better for this to just play out. It wasn’t like Ghost couldn’t hold his own.

In an attempt to lighten the mood, Soap ripped open a bag of chips followed by a joke. “Looks like mom and dad are fighting again.”

The smirk on his face was quickly wiped away as a pair of keys jingled right near his ear, embedded in his head rest. You had turned from your seat as soon as you registered his distasteful joke, thrown the car keys like a knife, and narrowly missed pinning his ear against the fabric. The car was dead silent as you stared daggers into him. Despite being a strong man with plenty of experiences with danger along with close calls, this experience had Johnny near pissing himself. If looks could kill, he would have been six feet under already.

What was worse was the fact that you missed on purpose. 

“Shut the fuck up! You are not to insinuate that again. Ever! Now, I don’t want anyone trying to talk to me or talk about me for the rest of this fucking trip. Talk to each other, I don’t give a shit. But no more dragging me into any conversation. Are we fucking clear?!”

You were met with quick, obedient nods followed by Soap gingerly handing you back your keys. Before you all knew it, you were back on the road like you didn’t just nearly kill Soap.

Simon was speechless, not expecting you to be so. . . dangerous. His feelings about what just happened were conflicting. On one hand, he wanted to fight you to defend his trusted sergeant that meant no harm, even if he didn’t really like the joke either. On the other hand, he’s never been more attracted to a woman in his life.

The car ride was silent for the next several hours.

~

Your muscles ached from your stiff position. You’ve been driving this whole time, only allowing gas breaks to be your time to stretch out. The boys have rotated seats every stop, now including Ghost who was finally giving you some space by being in the back. Last stop, though, he moved right up to the front with you once again. 

You were getting the dreaded road trip tunnel vision. After so many hours of driving, you couldn’t see anything except for the road ahead. You weren’t so much as driving anymore. You more like just looking out the front windshield, barely keeping up with the surrounding area that passed by. What you normally would recognize as trees, road signs, and roadkill were now just a big blur.

“You’re tired.” Simon commented, treading very carefully. He didn’t want to start another fight. Far from it. He just couldn’t bear to see you so exhausted from driving. 

“I’m fine.” Your voice strained, having lost some of it from the screaming match earlier in the trip. You weren’t used to talking so much as you have been for the past week, let alone fighting with words. A warm cup of tea with honey sounded so good right now.

Ghost took a deep breath in before he gently settled his hand on your shoulder. The fact that you didn’t shrug his touch away was very telling that you were really out of it. “Come on, Hex. Just for a bit. Pull over and I’ll take over the drive. We can switch back after you recuperate.”

It took you a minute to agree. Pulling off to the side of the road, you switched places. The room to stretch out in the passenger side was very much needed. Your bones cracked as you really gave yourself time to take it easy for a moment. “Just an hour. Then, we’ll switch.”

He nodded, finally agreeing with you on something out loud. “Just an hour.”

~

You ended up dozing off for longer than intended. Despite the agreement, Simon let you rest. The trip was already almost complete anyway. What was two more hours to add to your much needed rest?

When the car slowed to a stop, the gang woke up out of their naps, eager to exit the minivan and head into the average-looking hotel you had designated as the new checkpoint. It was nearing dinner-time, the city bustling with people heading to enjoy their meals. Price was ready for something other than chips. Soap and Gaz were already discussing potential food spots as if they were tourists. 

As they unloaded the car to carry their things into the hotel, you stayed asleep. Dead asleep. The deepest sleep you have had in what felt like a lifetime. The men were careful to not wake you up as they unloaded luggage after luggage out of the trunk. When everything was squared away with checking in as well as bringing luggage up to the rooms, you were still snoozing away, much to their surprise.

Price opened up your door, ready to wake you up to get a move on. However, Ghost stopped his hand from touching you. “I’ll take her up. Just go ahead and grab some grub.”

Well, John wasn’t going to say no to that offer. He would rather not be bit by such a feral woman. Though, he did feel like he had to warn Ghost of what he was really doing, having observed just about everything he was trying to do in regards to you. “You’re playing with fire, you know.”

Ghost unlocked your seatbelt and picked you up out of the minivan in a princess carry. Miraculously, you still didn’t wake up. “I know. . .”

The hotel staff were concerned with him carrying you into the hotel. A large man with a skull mask carrying an unconscious lady certainly didn’t look good. In order to avoid interference, Simon had a lie ready for when a bodyguard approached. “I know the mask is scary, but it hides some burn scars. I’m just taking the missus up to the room. She fell asleep in the car.”

Not being paid enough to question the lie, he allowed the both of you to pass by. 

You were heavy in his arms, but nothing he couldn’t handle. He could feel the softness of your skin, the firmness of your muscles. He could make out each individual eyelash that just barely kissed under your eyes. As much as you drove him crazy, you truly were beautiful.

The ding of the elevator reaching their floor knocked him out of his trance. Using a room key, he headed into your space for the next couple of days. The room was pretty basic. A bed, a dresser, tv, bathroom, nightstands, a desk. The only thing that really made it stand out was the original art of the wall made by local, Italian artists. 

He settled your sleeping body down onto the queen-sized bed, brushing your hair out of your face as you settled into the mattress. Looking at you like this was a breath of fresh air for him. He didn’t think he would be able to see you like this so soon. 

Sleeping around others was a sign of trust. Were you just really that exhausted? Probably. Ghost would still take this as a sign of victory anyway.

For a few moments longer, he studied your features. The sound of his stomach grumbling for a meal encouraged him to leave you be for now to which his brain protested. Then again, you probably wouldn’t like it if you found out that he watched you sleep.

Before he left, he took one last look at you, burning the image into his mind. “You said you didn’t sleep, kitten.”

[sluttyminghao]

down under ♡ j.w.w

♡ pairing: idol!wonwoo x female!reader ♡ genre: smut ♡ word count: 1.6k ♡ this fic contains: long-distance relationship, guided masturbation, video chatting, masturbation (f and m), wonwoo has a very very deep voice, reader gets off to his voice ♡ synopsis: wonwoo has landed in a new country and is pretty tired, but still makes the effort to call you. what he doesn't realize is how his husky voice will affect you. ♡ a/n: I wish I could say I was sorry but I'm really not, big thanks to @lovelyhan for proofreading for me :)

“Oh, hey!”

“Hey, baby, how are you?”

Wonwoo’s voice comes through the screen a little crackly, but it settles relatively quickly as his laptop adjusts to the hotel’s wifi. You can see him perfectly clearly, his dark hair fluffed up and his round specs perched delicately on the bridge of his nose. You could immediately see how exhausted he was, the dark circles under his eyes are prominent, but he still managed to call you as soon as he got to his hotel room and got settled in.

It made your heart skip a beat. 

“I’m okay, the bed feels empty without you but I’m sure I’ll manage, I always have,” your sentence has wonwoo’s features morphing into one of guilt, but he brushes it off quickly knowing that you always do fine when he goes away on tour. He smiles as you continue chatting about your day and what you did after he left for the airport in the early hours of the morning.

He didn’t want to leave you, your sleeping form nestled comfortably under the two blankets you always required. It was hard to drag himself out of the warmth of the bed you two shared and into the cool autumn air, but it was part of his job as an idol to be prepared at any time for any situation.

“But enough about me, how’s Australia? Was the flight over okay?” You see Wonwoo chuckle as he readjusts himself on the hotel bed, to which you can see a peek of his naked collarbone and shoulders. You had been so wrapped up in catching up with him before that you hadn’t even noticed he was half-naked and sitting on camera with you.

“The flight over was…okay? I didn’t get a lot of sleep because Vernon kept talking to me about a new video game that’s coming out soon, but the food was good, especially for plane food, and didn’t have any trouble with customs,” his voice is so soothing but you can tell he’s tired just from how it’s dropped an octave.

You don’t want to admit the way his voice sounds is turning you on, especially given how exhausted he was from his flight. However, you couldn’t help feeling your panties begin to stick to your folds the more he elaborated on what the band’s tour would be like over the next few weeks, the deep and dulcet tones of his voice going straight to your pussy.

Whilst Wonwoo was exhausted, he was still sharp enough to see you weren’t in the right frame of mind either; your fingers picking at the skin of your lips and your eyes darting in all directions, not looking him in the eye (as best as you could over a camera anyway.)

“Baby, what’s going on?”

Your mind is hazed over with lust, your fingers teasing your sopping folds and picturing that they were Wonwoo’s instead. You had almost completely forgotten he was on camera with you, observing how your body writhes and how your whimpers cascade through his speakers like a wonderful harmony.

He doesn’t have to ask you again what’s going on.

That’s when he begins to formulate a plan, something that will send you over the edge over and over.

“Angel, come back to me, I want to see your pretty face.”

You're finally snapped out of your haze at the use of the pet name, and you feel your cheeks begin to burn at the prospect of what you’d just been caught doing. You can see Wonwoo grinning at you like he normally does when you are desperate for release. What you can’t see, however, below the camera is that he’s now discarded his slacks and is sitting butt naked on his bed, cock rigid and leaking precum onto his lower abdomen.

“Sorry…kinda got caught up…”

He raises an eyebrow at you as you try to explain yourself and trip over your own words, and can’t help but notice you’ve removed your loose-fitting shirt and are now sitting in just your bra and presumably, underwear. Just imagining the sight of you alone like that has his cock twitching against his stomach.

“What were you thinking about darling? Guide me through your thoughts.”

You can see his eyes have grown darker, pooling with lust and want. Your heartbeat quickens and suddenly you feel much more vulnerable than before, but push the feelings down very quickly and gasp when you glance back at the camera.

Wonwoo has shifted his laptop to the end of the bed, exposing his naked body to your eyes. You can see how his cock is red and angry, with small pools of precum landing in the crevices of his abs. He wraps a hand around his cock and begins to pump himself slowly, and you watch as his head falls back with a small groan at the contact.

“Go on, angel, tell me.”

“Oh, uh, well, I saw your collarbones earlier and I pictured myself leaving marks on them, and then I pictured your fingers teasing me all along my thighs and my pussy…”

Your voice trails off as you watch Wonwoo spread his legs and start pumping his cock quicker, his groans and moans becoming much more prominent the more you talk. You can’t help but to kick your panties and bra off and spread your legs, moving your laptop to the end of the bed so he can see all of you.

“Keep g-going, fuck, so good for me…”

A new wave of arousal floods your body and you can feel your cunt growing slicker by the second. Your fingers quickly find your folds again and begin to tease, sliding up and down almost torturously while your thumb glides over your clit and makes your thighs twitch with the contact. 

“I… I also picture how good you fuck me, how you hold my throat when I-I’m about to cum, and-and how you always hold my thighs apart and tell me how good I am for you,” you finish your sentence with a whine as you let a finger slip inside your entrance, still feeling empty without his touch.

Despite your comments coming to a stop, Wonwoo’s movements don’t. With the perfect mixture of his imagination and your words, as well as your pretty whines and moans coming through his laptop speaker, he’s able to buck his hips into his hands harshly and bring himself to the brink of his orgasm.

Your mind is complete mush as you slip a second finger into your entrance, pumping quickly to find your own release. A hand reaches up to squeeze at your boobs, imagining it’s his large hands rather than your own, much smaller in comparison to his and not feeling nearly the same.

For a while, you both just let each other get caught up in your moans and whines, letting them tangle together in the most harmonious of ways. The sight of you alone has Wonwoo almost blowing his load, and he has to bring his hand down to his base and squeeze tightly enough to ensure he wouldn’t cum as quickly.

“I’m close,” Wonwoo’s voice has grown even deeper in his own chase for release and you feel the rubber band in your stomach tighten even more. Even though he’s not physically with you, it’s almost as if you can feel him with you as your orgasm begins to peak. He can tell you’re close too, with the way your voice quivers with each moan and word you try to pronounce. 

“Cum with me, angel, are you ready?”

You whine out your response as your thumb moves harshly over your clit and a third finger enters your dripping cunt, picturing that it’s his cock instead. Incoherent mumbles begin slipping from your lips and your mind grows delirious as you wait for his signal to cum.

“Three.”

“Two…”

“O-one. Cum with me, baby.”

The white light explodes over your vision as you cum hard from his command, your fingers getting coated in juices and your body trembling violently as the waves of your orgasm crash over you. You peek your eyes open and can see Wonwoo in a very similar situation, except he has cum painting his entire abdomen up to his chest, and all down his thighs.

While you both come down from your highs, you can hear each other panting and it takes all your strength to pull yourself up and bring the laptop back up so that your face and chest are all that’s in view now. You take in the sight of him post-orgasm, still recovering with his head hanging low and his thighs lightly trembling.

“Won? Are you okay baby?”

He lifts his head and smiles at you dopily, before lifting his laptop back onto his lap. You can see his lips are slightly swollen from being bitten, and he looks so soft. While you wish you could stay on call longer, you knew it was getting late for him, and he still had to shower and eat.

“I’m okay, I promise.”

“Good, now please go and eat something and get to bed early, you look like you’re going to fall asleep any second!”

He grins at your loving scolding and says his goodbyes to you, but not before blowing you an air kiss and promising to call you when he wakes up the following morning. You smile and turn your computer off, before heading to the shower to think about Wonwoo and his fingers some more.

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[thelingodingo]

Korean Titles of BTS Songs

Remember when a bunch of fans were asking Jungkook about BTS' song 'Paradise' and he had no idea what they were talking about since the Korean name of the song is different from the English?

Well, that's what I thought I could make a post about since it's very common across multiple of their songs!

A lot of the times in Kpop, the Korean name of a song has a completely different translation than the English name so I wanted to start a series explaining the more intricate details of the translations.

So first up here's a list of explanations of a couple BTS Korean song titles:

Paradise = 낙원 : this is just a regular direct translation

Fire = 불타오르네 : I think this Korean song title is great enough to have a post of its own due to how useful it would be to Korean learners as it requires knowledge of multiple aspects of Korean to truly understand. In English, it could still be translated as "fire" but it definitely holds more meaning in the original Korean. 불 (bul) means fire and the verb 불타오르다 (bul ta o reu da) means "to be burning/aflamed". The 네 (ne) part of the title 불타오르네 (bul ta o reu ne) is a grammar particle that expresses admiration, surprise, etc. So all together the song title is sort of saying something along the lines of "oh look, it's burning up in flames" I guess??? It's hard to try and explain the nuance in English.

Telepathy = 잠시 : this title translates directly to "for a moment"

Boy with Luv = 작은 것들을 위한 시 : beautifully means "a poem for the small things" which I think would've made a great English title too

Go Go = 고민보다 GO : this translates to "rather than worrying about it, go"

Dis-ease = 병 : this literally translates to disease in Korean but apparently some media(?) thought it translated to 'bottle' (like a plastic water bottle) which I guess makes sense since it's the same word in Korean but lmao I thought that was funny.

I do like BTS but I'm not an Army so if any fans happen to know any deeper information that may further elaborate on the reasoning for these title changes in English please feel free to add on!

If you would like a Part 2 or have any specific questions then just ask!

I know I've been away for a very long time to any of my followers that keep up with my posts (thank u btw) and I am trying to get back into posting but it has been an extremely busy year for me :(