#i care and thats enough!!! now shoo

[okkottsus]

no one cares about toga girl

thats exactly why im giffing her ♥️

[bunbunlovestowrite]

How the Hashira men react to your neighbor asking you to be quiet

Characters: Tengen, Sanemi, Rengoku, Obanai, Gyomei, Giyuu,

Additional shit: Swearing, Sanemi fighting said neighbor, Rengoku being blunt, mentions of sex, ooc mot likely :p

Tengen

He couldn't care less

His whole thing is being flashy and loud so he wants you to be loud

Like it's not his fault that dick is magical

After he shoos your neighbor away he makes sure to be as loud as possible that night

He's pounding into your cunt and you swear your gonna break when he whispers "okay now scream exactly how big my dick is. Don't forget the tip color-"

He gets cut off by you hitting him with the pillow

Way to ruin the mood

But that doesn't stop him and instead he goes harder, making sure the bed creaks loud ASF for your neighbor

"Not my fault he doesn't know how to please a woman." Is his main reason for doing so

He really wants you to scream his name so it's imbedded in your neighbors head

"Morning N/N!" Him to your neighbor from the balcony while your trying to get out of bed and failing

"Actually die." Both you and your neighbor to Tengen

Sanemi

Cares alot

Why the fuck is that limp dick biscuit talking to you and him? Who does he think he is?

You were the one who broke the news to him thankfully cause if Sanemi was the one who opened the door then you'd have to see your husband through glass in a prison

Just kidding. The Slayer corp would get him out of trouble if he didn't do it himself.

Anyways

Sanemi made it his goal to piss your neighbor off as much as possible

Your under him, practically creaming on his cock, and he's slamming the wall yelling "This loud enough yet?! Huh!?"

Not kidding I can see him doing that

He quite literally had you against a window where your neighbors could see him destroying you just to make them mad or uncomfortable, hopefully both.

But then he'd get pissed someone else would see you all naked and fucked out so he settled for the wall next to the window

One day your neighbor, finally having enough, bangs on your door yelling and guess who opens it...Sanemi!!

Good Lord was he waiting for this

It took one punch and the guy was out

Kinda what happens when you put a normal dude against a guy who kills demons for a living

Rengoku

He's a good neutral between caring and not caring

Like he doesn't wanna make your neighbors mad but he also loves hearing your screams

So he tries to keep you quiet during sex but fails since he gets to into it to give a fuck

The next days his loud ass voice wakes you up

"IM SORRY FOR MAKING INCREDIBLE LOVE TO MY WIFE!" He's not being sarcastic thats his genuine apology

Your facepalming and you want to die when you see your neighbor and she can't look at you

"PERHAPS SHES MAD BECAUSE HER HUSBAND CANNOT PLEASE HER!" Rengoku says casually and you know she can hear you from outside in her garden

"Inside voices!" You place your hands over his mouth to try and shut him up.

It works for a bit before he's yelling again

You love your husband but holy shit you wish he would speak normally sometimes

He's actually quiet in bed though

So your the problem (real)

Obanai

I'm not an Obanai fan so forgive me for how bad his section will be

Obanai is a quiet mf, and you're not even that loud

It's your neighbor who was the problem

A little old man whose hearing aids apparently had the power of 67 suns

You and Obanai found this out when he was outside training and your neighbor came over

He was so sweet and polite and even chuckled at Obanai's redness

Obanai cared at first but got over it

You? You make sure to not make a PEEP in bed

Okay that pisses Obanai off but he understands your reasons

At least make a gasp or sum cause he's over here like "Wait does this feel good? Can she feel it? Did I forget where the clit is?"

Brother is STRESSING

Then you cum and he's like "ah"

Then he's like "Did you take it?"

You have to keep yourself from murdering him cause how tf would you fake squirting

Gyomei

Babe I'm not gonna lie, you're a screamer

Gyomei is built like a house and your telling me your just gonna whine and whimper?

NO

Your over here crying and screaming into his chest, neck, the pillow, anything.

And Gyomei loves it!

He can't see your reactions so hearing and feeling them let's him know he's doing good

Gyomei isn't loud but he's not quiet

He'll grunt and moan and praise you, but he's not gonna cry out.

Well he'll cry but you can never tell from what

When the pussy so good you start crying 😭🙏

When your neighbor politely asked you to be a tad bit quieter Gyomei actually laughed

Not in a 'nah we'll keep being loud' way but more of a 'sorry we'll be quiet' way. He also found it hilarious how you actually died of embarrassment.

Don't worry he thinks its endearing

Yet it was kinda hard for him since he enjoyed hearing you

But your touches and now quieter moans made that better

And then there's also you literally drawing blood from his back you were scratching so hard

Giyuu

Holy shit you have never seen him so embarrassed

Like you could shade match his Haori to him and get the exact same color

He was the one your neighbor told and he stopped working when 'loud' and 'moaning' left their lips

If a demon doesn't kill him then his own actions will

Giyuu isn't loud, and he loves that he can make you feel so good that your loud for him.

But he didn't want your neighbor back over at your house so he tried to keep you quiet

You were super confused when he held his hand over your mouth in bed and he just pointed to your neighbors house. Then you got it.

So you nod and try to keep quiet.

You know in school when the teacher tells you and a friend to shut up but they look at you funny and you break?

Yeah that was you

You were riding Giyuu one night and you were loud so he was like "holy shit I love you but please- I can't look our neighbor in the eyes anymore."

And you couldn't help but laugh

Like howling

You calmed down obviously but sex was very giggle filled after that

You've never seen Giyuu so panicked

But give him a week and he'll stop caring

[insomniakisses]

An eye for an eye | One

Characters: Aemond x sister reader (platonic), Rhaenyra x sister reader (platonic), Alicent x step daughter reader (Platonic) (hotd characters)

Reader type: Female

Warnings / Notes: tw viserys, tw otto, tw daemon, events of driftmark, absent and shitty father viserys, metions of torturous, dragons, graphic violent scenes. I think thats it. Possable targcest in the future.

Parts: Two.

You couldn’t help the giggles that escaped your lips as you ran around the gardens, aemond chasing after you soft giggles falling from him two. The younger boy declaring he was going to catch you but he was at a disadvantage you were 4 years older than him, though even at the age of 10 he was gaining height and strength.

You begin to slow as tiredness kicks in and he smirks, using the last of his energy to surge forward catching up with ease as he wraps his arms around you and pushes you both to the floor. Laughter escaping you both on impact. Though its short lived when rhaenyra comes bolting over pulling you off the ground a hard glare fixed on her face.

“That is most un-lady like sister,” she hisses before her gaze fixes on your brother, “Aemond do you not know how to properly behave around a lady?” She scolds and you roll your eyes seeing jace and luke laughing behind her.

“I- we were playing! Only playing! Shes not hurt i promise-“ the young prince stutters clearly afraid of the much older royals wraith knowing just how protective of you your sister can be.

“Really?” She draws out with a scoff bringing ur arm into view and he sees the smallest of scrapes along your forearm his eyes widening.

“Rhaenyra!” You call shaking off her grip and moving to stand by Aemond, “its barely an injury, it doesn’t even hurt. You needn’t worry yourself!” You exclaim hand clasping Aemond’s as you continue. “He will take me to the maesters to get it checked out now, won’t you Aem?”

The boy nods with a small smile when you squeeze his hand in reassurance making sure he knows your not in the slightest mad at him and that everything is okay.

Spending the rest of the day inside the two of you resigned to the library reading up on family histories and practicing your High Valyrian. Save the brief interruption from Alicent, the queen asking to check your injury having been informed by Rhaenyra that her “undisciplined” son had caused you harm.

Though as soon as she saw you two laughing and joking around she knew in her heart that there was no way he would have hurt you. Especially not intentionally.

You simply smile at the queen greeting her by her title and allowing her to gently lift your arm inspecting the wound before she left you be leaving a soft kiss to both of your heads as she bid her goodbyes. On her way to the king no doubt.

— one year later —

The whole family was being taken to Driftmark, apparently for the funeral of Laena Velarion. Though the two of you had only spoken once, having accidentally ran into her and Rhaenyra, she seemed nice enough and you were sad that she had died so early into her life. Your half-sibling however didn’t seem to care. Aegon was ceaselessly complaining as usual, Helaena of in her own world like always and Aemond, well he was respectful enough to understand why you were going but he clearly wasn’t saddened by the news.

The king and Alicent were set to arrive by boat accompanied by the four of you, but Aegon having recently mounted Sunfyre for a real flight insisted he go by dragon back the king uncaringly agreeing and shooing of Alicent’s protests. Her visible worry evident the whole way as she picked and chewed at her fingers you and Aemond sharing a concern look before going over to her. Grasping a hand each you held her tightly and she smiled. You couldn’t tell if it was forced or not, but she let out a small exhale as she held you giving away she was more relaxed even if it was only slightly.

Once the ship had docked Alicent all but ran to Aegon though he rolled his eyes and told her to leave him be as he wasn’t a child anymore. He failed to see how she flinched when Sunfyre moved or how she stood still till the dragon moved away. One of her biggest fears dragons were, something you had picked up recently.

You latch back onto her arm when she’s beside you again, having grown rather attached to her in the years of Rhaenyras absence. She had left without warning or a goodbye. You can still remember the nights you laid crying for her hugs or her soft touch when she braided your hair helping you ready yourself in the morning. All of that was Alicent’s job now, not that she minded, she loved you as her own and enjoyed how you curled against her needy for a mother’s touch. She just wishes you wouldn’t call her Alicent, it always hurt her not hearing the word “mother”.

———— That Night ————

The funeral had been somewhat uneventful, Aegon had gotten drunk and was sent to bed early by Otto and Daemon had made a scene laughing during the ceremony. But that was all really, soon you were all sent to bed and you had fallen asleep as soon as your head hit the pillow. Exhausted from the day of traveling no doubt.

However, the sound of whooshing and a dragons deep roar had woken you, slipping on a cloak and your shows you had gone to investigate. By the time you came downstairs there was shouting and a trail of blood into the main hall. Following it you entered seeing Aemond holding his eye and the adults screaming at each other. Jace with bloody hands and Luke with a broken nose yet Rhaenyra, Daemon and Laenor were nowhere in sight. You rushed to Aemond side feeling Alicent pull u into her body your hand grasping her dress as you stares at the bloody sight.

Then in came Rhaenyra and you completely zoned out staying by Aemond’s side and holding his hand throughout the whole ordeal. Crying for your brother when the king seemed not to care and made no move to punish the boys for attacking him.

After all was said and done Aemond was given milk of the poppy and essence of night shade for the pain and to help him sleep. While the rest of you were ushered to your respective chambers though you slept very little worried about Aemond and so saddened at Rhaenyra’s intention of having someone torturing him. Afterall he had just lost an eye.

———— Back in Kings Landing ————

“ALICENT ENOUGH!” the king roared, having had enough of her nagging.

“THEY TOOK HIS EYE, YOUR GRACE, SOMEONE HAS TO PAY!” And he sighs sitting on his throne looking half dead.

“My dear wife,” he starts voice bored and tired. “Lucerys is just a boy. Children fight. Get over it.”

She scoffs at this, fighting the urge to yell again knowing his power out matches hers. “A debt is due your grace, an eye for an eye. He is your son!”

“What would you have me do?” He scoffs, “The boy is at dragon stone and he is my grandchild.”

“I dont care!” The queen protests, “You have to do something! Rhaenyra’s son has taken the eye of my own, a punishment is deserved. Someone must be punished!” If the queen had known her lack of precise words would lead to the events that would unfold that night she would never have been so careless.

“Fetch Y/n” is all he mutters and a guard sets of at once, Alicent so caught up in her thoughts not quiet hearing what he had ordered. Its only when a sleepy and confused you is escorted in that her breath quickens.

You stand there rubbing the sleep from your eyes, blinking away exhaustion as your blanket lays draped over your shoulders giving you a slight waddle when you walk.

“What is she-“ Alicent is cut of by the king. “Bring me her eye, a debt is to be payed and she is like a daughter to Rhaenyra. Lets settle this now”

Your heart fills with fear and dread as does Alicent’s as your grabbed by two guards another forcing his knife into your flesh. Alicent screaming protest as she herself is restrained tears falling down her face at your pained crys and shrieks. Your father simply holding his head in his hand as he feels another migraine coming.

“MOMMA PLEASE! IT HURTS MOM PLEASE MOMMY HELP!” you continue to scream and thrash around the knife in your flesh leaving messy cuts until your eye pulls out with a sickening wet pop and you scream loud.

You both released and alicent runs to you scooping you up and rocking you as you cry, hands balling up her dress as a mumbles mantra of “momma” escapes your lips she holds you as the maesters tend to your wounds and give you all the same teas and treatments Aemond had gotten in drifting mark. The king and guards now long gone.

“Im so sorry baby” is all she keeps saying kissing your head and carrying you to her chambers. You spend the night there, tucked into her embrace as she holds you swearing to protect you from this day swearing that one day the king will get what he deserves. And praying to the gods for all her children to be safe.

A/n. So this was part one hope u liked it 😁

[dipperscavern]

Ok, just read your blurb about being Jessica’s assistant and being nicknamed baby.

What if the origin of baby was that someone was giving baby shit and someone else (Harvey perhaps) says the classic line “no one puts baby in the corner” when coming to her defense. Then it just kind of spirals from there and no one gives her shit again.

Also feel free to ignore this, literally just my first thought when reading your post!

oh my god. when i tell you i SCREAMED this is so genius & yummy.. PHEW. i know exactly what ur referencing ily & thank u so much for the ask! 🫶🏻

“I’m just saying, the assistant to the Jessica Pearson.. and your desk looks like this?”

you roll your eyes, the hint of a playful expression on your face. while you knew he wasn’t being completely serious, you liked your desk — pink things, trinkets, & personal touches all. you found decorating your desk as a fun way of personal expression, and you were so damn good at your job, jessica didn’t care.

“Would you like to re-decorate for me?”

your reply is dripping sarcasm, a playful tone in your voice that masks how you really feel. you look up at the few bored associates hanging around your desk, and they snicker at your reply.

“Yes I will, thank you. It’s.. something. Could use a more professional look.”

that makes you frown. something? more professional? what started out as a joke seemed more like a personal attack the more it went on. tom, the associate who’s mouth was moving, never seemed to know when to stop. you’re about to say something when a miracle in the flesh steps in your line of sight — harvey specter.

it’s ironic, really. he radiates business when the very reason he came over to your desk was to shoo off the associates bothering you. he looks around to the people that have now stiffened up in his presence, and he gives them an almost confused look.

“And what the hell are you doing?”

tom swallows. “Just- messing around. Sir.”

“What?” harvey looks around. “What’s wrong, you.. don’t like her desk? Is that the nationwide issue we’re facing today?”

you look up at harvey, a faux expression of sympathy on your face. “He doesn’t like the color pink, sir.”

that makes harvey’s brow raise, for two reasons. one, his associates shouldn’t have the time to be complaining about any colors. & two, you’ve been on a first name basis with harvey for a year. he doesn’t mind people calling him sir, but he definitely does mind when it’s you, batting your lashes & giving him a look thats sure to distract him for the rest of the day.

“You shouldn’t have time to worry about the color pink. Time is money, money is time, and if you have time to complain then your workload must not be large enough to satiate your.. innate genius.”

harvey pulls out his cellphone while talking, as if he couldn’t be bothered to give them the time of day — which he really can’t. he’s not really typing anything, but they’ll never know that.

“Don’t be sad she’s not as miserable as the rest of you. Get back to work.”

mumbles of “yes sir” can be heard throughout the office as they move to gather their things & get up, obeying the order given to them with only slight disdain.

“Thanks, Harvey.”

he reaches for the two-pack of oreos on your desk, grabbing one & handing it back to you.

“Nobody puts baby in the corner.”

this makes your brows furrow as you smile, & he bites into his cookie as you reach for yours. he quickly notices the look on your face.

“What?”

“Dirty dancing?”

he gives you a look of his own. “Sir?”

you smile as he walks away, getting back to work of his own. & you fail to notice the associates ears tuned into your small conversation as you bite into your cookie. hey, what’s the worst that could happen?

“Thanks, Baby.”

“Hey, Baby, could you-“

“Where’s Baby?”

“I need this for Baby.”

you stand corrected. jessica pearson herself joins in after a mere day. “Baby, I need you to reschedule that meeting with Mr. Sawyer. Give him my sincerest apologies- I gotta run.”

“Yes ma’am.”

she quickly gathers her things & leaves, in a rush to complete her full schedule. once she’s gone, you put your head in your hands, sighing. your official nickname is baby.

and you like it.

[winwintea]

A Kiss to Make it Better - Hong Seunghan

PAIRING ↬ hong seunghan x fem!reader

AUTHOR'S NOTE ↬ FRIENDLY REMINDER TO BOYCOTT RIIZE. RIIZE IS OT7, if ur ot6 briize pls get OFF my profile. guess what it's fei's birthday and it's also seunghan's birthday so double whammy. how does it feel to be born on the exact same day as ur bias huh. like thats crazy. not tagging her account bc she said she wants to remain "mysterious" wtv u suck. anyways happy 21 years old to both u and seunghan <333

GENRES ↬ fluff, romance, seunghan is sick, this is really just a short drabble i whipped up, lil suggestive esp at the end

WORD COUNT ↬ 1K

It was early afternoon, and you were humming as you made your way into Seunghan’s room. 

“Seunghan, isn’t it about time you took a break? I brought you some coffee.” It was right about the time Seunghan usually took a break, and you smiled as you knocked on his door and stepped into his room. 

He was sitting at his desk, hunched over his essays, completely absorbed. He barely glanced back at you, then turned back to face his work again. “Mmm, thanks. Just leave it there. I’m right in the middle of a very good creative burst, and you’re probably busy, too, so… you don’t need to stay.”

“Hmm? Okay, if you say so.” That wasn’t like him though–normally he welcomed you with a hug and kiss, no matter how busy or inspired he was. You frowned for a moment studying his back, and then you stepped closer, putting his coffee down and leaning in towards him. “Arthur, is something… hang on a minute!”

“Y/N, wait–”

You ignored his words and pressed your hand against his forehead, and sure enough… he was burning up. “Seunghan, you’ve got a fever!”

“Damn… you noticed,” he muttered, a weak grin tugging at his lips.

“Of course I did! Now put that laptop away and get into bed!” You shot him a stern look as you half-led, half-dragged him towards the bed. He was so unsteady on his feet that when you gave the lightest push, he practically collapsed onto the mattress.

“Am I dreaming, or are you actually pushing me down onto the bed? You na—” His teasing was cut short by a fit of wheezing coughs that left him breathless.

You crossed your arms, trying to look more annoyed than worried. “I’ll do more than push you down onto the bed if you don’t stop joking around and get some rest!”

“...Okay, okay.” Seunghan let out a long, loud sigh of resignation, and then he slumped back against the pillow, his eyes falling shut.

You tucked him in, and then hurried off to get some medicine, water, and a cool cloth for his forehead. 

Why the hell was he pretending to be fine, though? He clearly felt awful, and all he had to do was just tell you…

You sighed to yourself as you knocked on his door, and then hurried into his room without waiting for an answer. “Seunghan, I’m back–”

“Y/N…” His voice was hoarse, interrupted by another round of coughing. “...ahh, dammit, should’ve just locked the door…”

Wait. Locked the door? What was he talking about? You paused, a flicker of confusion crossing your mind, but quickly shook it off. That could wait. Right now, he needs you to focus on getting him better.“I don’t care about that right now,” you said, determined as you walked towards him, arms full of medicine, cold water, and a damp cloth. “I brought reinforcements.” Your doubts faded as you focused on helping him, determined to make him feel better, no matter what secrets he was keeping.

But before you could get too close, Seunghan lifted his hands, weakly making shooing gestures. “...Don’t come any closer,” he rasped, his voice barely holding together. Then, through labored breaths, he added with a mischievous glint in his eyes, “When I’m better… I’ll be as wild as you want me to be… to make up for it. I’ll be better soon, right?”

For a moment you just stopped and stared at him, but suddenly everything fell into place in your head. “Seunghan… when you were pretending to be busy earlier, and talking about locking the door– Was that all because you didn’t want me to catch whatever it is you’ve got?”

“...Got it in one.” He let out a deep, exhausted sigh, rolling onto his side as he gave you a tired, lopsided frown. “I knew if you realized I was sick, you’d go into full-on ‘nurse mode’… and I can’t let you get sick too. You’re already juggling so much… you don’t need to be fussing over me…”

Even through the fever and discomfort, his eyes were clouded with worry—worry for you. It was enough to make your heart ache, a bittersweet reminder of why you loved him so much. Even when he was feeling miserable, his concern was all for you.

“Besides, I can’t stand the idea of having you right here… but not being able to do anything with you…”

You rolled your eyes. Never mind. His annoying side was definitely still alive and kicking.

He still sounded so genuinely distressed even while making jokes that you couldn’t help laughing. “If you’re well enough to be thinking about that, then you’ll be feeling fine again in no time. Look, Seunghan, I’m really grateful that you care so much. But I care about you too, okay? So let me take care of you.”

“Fine, fine, alright already. And… thanks, Y/N.” Seunghan sighed again, and the smile he gave you was both troubled and relieved.

His small smile made your heart swell. Even in moments like this, it was clear—he wasn’t just grateful, he was reassured by having you by his side.

—-

Three days later, you stopped by Seunghan’s room first thing in the morning and he grinned at you as he sat up and stretched languidly. “Mmm, see? No more coughing, no more fatigue! I’m quite the picture of health.”

Seunghan had cut you off with a sudden kiss, one hand coming up to twine in your hair and pull you closer as he pecked teasingly at your lips.

You blinked in surprise. “What was that for?”

“Don’t you remember?” he murmured, his voice low and playful. “I promised I’d be as ‘crazy’ as you wanted to make up for things once I was better. It’s been three days, and I’ve got a lot of lost time to make up for... and let’s just say, I’m feeling very ‘crazy’ right now.”

His grin was wicked, and suddenly, you knew exactly what kind of “crazy” he meant.

PERM TAGLIST ↬ @lyvhie @aquaphoenixz @galacticnct @ldh0000

[the-s1lly-corner]

May I please have a request of head cannons of TADC crew dealing with a clingy kid reader

Like two of them are basically plushies (Jax and Ragtha)

And please do take your time

TADC cast x clingy!kid!reader (platonic!)

YAHOO!! my back hurts but its okay because i drew my oc looking... (checks notes) "cunty" (doesnt know if theyre using the word right) anyways gonna knock out a few more requests; got that one friendship is witchcraft song playing on loop in my headphones so im typing like a speed demon rn RAAAAAAh

CAINE:

honestly hes probably the same with you, though like. with his eyes; he keeps an eye on you at all times. like i can easily caine being kind of negligent when it comes to kids and letting them get into harms way, but i also adore the idea of him fretting over you and trying to keep you safe. does not mind your clinginess, not one bit. always keeps close in IHAs, in fact we may even be able to joke that hes now a participant in his own games! he does it for both of your comforts, and to make sure you dont get hurt.. in cases where he cant be around, for whatever reason, he promotes bubble to babysitter to keep an eye on you; i think! reads you bedtime stories every night

POMNI:

i think i may have mentioned this a few times but pomni can get a little uncomfortable around kids; kids can be really wild and/or horrifically honest with no filter and pomni does not have the mental strength to cope, digital world or not/lh

with that being said it would take her a while to get used to you gravitating around her; i dont think she would tell you to leave her alone though. i mean, she tries to put herself in your shoes. shes losing her mind in this place and shes brand new and a grown woman. how is this effecting you? so she sticks around and just. embraces it, i think. probably checks in on you when you go to bed... kind of pauses when you ask her to stay, be it because you dont want her to go or because youre scared of monsters under the bed i think she would ultimately stay by your bed in a chair and watch over you

RAGATHA:

good news for hugging her, shes very soft thanks to the fact that shes literally a doll! honestly its rare that she would tell you to step aside so she can do something; plus like caine she generally likes to keep an eye on you to make sure youre not getting into trouble or danger,,, makes you plushies so you hang onto them when shes away and you miss her. like caine she also has a bedtime routine with you. maybe its because i just watched some adventure time today, but the ritual would be similar to sweet p's bedtime ritual (bedtime cheek kisses, tucking in, reassuring that youre loved ect ect ect) idk i just think ragatha would have that kind of energy when caring for a kid reader, clingy or not

holds

JAX:

one of the two characters who might get annoyed by your clinginess, especially in the beginning (oh boy i sure wonder who the other one is (looks at zooble)) and he might try to push you away and shoo you when you try to stick around him. might feel a little bad when he sees the sad look in your eyes when you turn away and walk away. jax, feeling bad for once? now thats rare

might try to bond with you by trying to teach you his ways of trickery; no one wants to see a kid sad, especially in a place like this and i dont think jax would be immune to your pouty face. older brother and little sibling dynamic, i think! i genuinely cannot see jax being fatherly, tbh

KINGER:

DAD KINGER DAD KINGER; do i need to say more? honestly kinger is very clingy himself with the people he cares about, given that hes lost so much he wants to make sure that those he cares about are still safe and sound. if anything, you might be the one asking him to dial it down a notch!/j

lets you snuggle up into him during bedtime stories, i think! like while the others who read to you would be sitting on a chair next to the bed, kinger would be close enough for you to lean into him if that makes sense. generally very sweet to you too, i think!

ZOOBLE:

the other one who would be a little annoyed by how clingy you are, again, especially in the beginning. zooble seems to really value their own personal time and space so its likely that they would try to set up a boundary; so you probably arent going to be able to spend every waking moment with them... that said i dont think they would exactly be... mean to you... like they dont hate you, they just tend to get irritated by small things! makes very clear communication, which is an important thing to learn! teaching moment! also cannot see them picking up a parental role, i can see them being the cool but angsty older sibling tbh. probably kind of freezes up when you hug them but does not push you away. does care deeply for you, just shows it in their own unique way

GANGLE:

oh you probably accidentally drag her around without fully meaning to! i mean im not sure how old the reader is, but lets say theyre on the younger side and they dont fully. mean to just drag gangle across the room. i mean its not like youre dragging her across the floor, at least! plus gangle is just so light, given that shes totally made of ribbon in the digital world. she doesnt really mind all the much, though... even if she did im not sure if she would speak up... lets you come and go into her room whenever, since sometimes you just miss her and she has enough trust in you not to mess with anything + sometimes you guys do arts and crafts together! yipee!

[miniaturecollectiveendermen]

TBHK

Kou, Teru, Yamabuki (Lemon) and Akane(boy) with a GN S/O who sleeps ANYWHERE. In class, during lunch, while studying, while cuddling, etc.

falling asleep with them ♡

~ feat. kou, teru, yamabuki and akane aoi

!!WARNINGS!! just pure fluff, gn!reader, no gendered pronouns mentioned

kou

kou didnt notice your ability to fall asleep anywhere at first

when he first met you he assumed you were just really tired, he was worried about you cuz he thought you werent getting enough rest

he didnt want to pry into your personal life too much but eventually he did end up asking you if you were getting enough sleep

you explained the situation to him and he was amazed

so thats just something you do?

it took a little while but eventually he gets used to it

whenever you fall asleep he makes sure no one disturbs you (especially hanako)

if anyone ever bothers you about he immediately comes to your defense, if its a ghost then he'll immediately threaten to exorcise them (or just do it depends on who it is)

he always makes sure youre comfortable whenever/where ever you sleep

if you fall asleep while the two of you are cuddling he becomes stiff and tries his best not to disturb you

he'll glare daggers at anyone who might disturb your slumber since he cant get up and shoo them away

teru

MY LOVE

ahem

teru is an observant person and being his s/o means he notices every little thing about you

he knows everything you like or dislike, your little habits and characteristics

the moment he notices you falling asleep any where and everywhere he starts doing things to make you more comfortable

he'll carry a pillow or blanket around for you (dont ask how hes teru he can do anything)

if he doesnt have a blanket he'll use his jacket as a blanket

he finds your unique ability quite cute and he might tease you about it, but in a friendly way

if anyone else teases or bothers you about it tho he'll immediately put an end to it

he does get worried about it at first, he makes sure youre getting enough rest

if you fall asleep while cuddling he'll hold you close and make sure youre able to rest comfortably

if he feels peaceful enough he might fall asleep with you

i love him

yamabuki (lemon)

okay im gonna be honest i forgot what his personality is like so i had to go through his wiki for this-

so yamabuki isnt the most observant person nor does he care about his surroundings very much so he doesnt notice you falling asleep immediately

but after a few times of it happening he'll take notice and pay closer attention

if you fall asleep around him he'll take pictures of you sleeping (with permission ofc) and tease you with them later

another character who thinks you falling asleep everywhere is cute

he likes taking pictures of things that interest him and you interest him a lot :)

he may seem like the bad boy type who doesnt care about anything

which is partly true

he cares a lot about you

he just has different ways of showing it

and taking pictures of you is one of those ways

akane aoi

okay so this man is extremely affectionate

and hes very open with his affection too

he notices you sleeping everywhere immediately

and once he does he'll make sure youre as comfortable as possible

like teru he'll have a blanket or pillow on hand all the time

he'll go as far as to have a place for you to rest in the student council room

which may result in teru ending him

but for you its worth it

if anyone even thinks about annoying you while you sleep or bother you about it he will not hesitate to end them

but if you tell him not too he wont (reluctantly)

when you fall asleep while cuddling he'll hold you close to him

he'll stay with you for as long as necessary

A/N: im sorry this took so long, ive been caught up with a lot of things in my personal life and had to put my writing to the side but im back now!! hopefully i wont disappear again but i cant make any promises

[gcnpeachbeach]

mario origin that is believable and does not contradict the games while still taking external media into consideration here we go

mario and luigi are, as established in yoshis island, natural born mushroom kingdom citizens. their parents were the ones who got isekai'd in bc that is the only explanation i can think of for actual humans to be in the mushroom kingdom (i refuse to believe new donkers are human)

shortly after they are delivered, their parents leave the picture. they mightve died or abandoned them or whatever doesnt matter this isnt about them who cares the point is theyre out of the way by the time princess peach is a year old.

peach, who is humanoid and thus much faster and stronger than any toad, needs someone to play with, but the toad children that offer cannot keep up with her. the newly orphaned mario and luigi are presented to her, and they immediately become best friends. bowser causes trouble now and then, but more in a petty playground bully who pushes peach around to show her he "likes her" or whatever. its a common occurance but mario and luigi, and eventually peach once she gets bold enough, shoo him off pretty easily.

as time goes on, peach starts to outgrow the concept of playmates, but theres no way she was letting mario and luigi leave her side, either. when she was 13 and the bros were 16, she had toadsworth find them a job to do that would keep them at the castle as much as possible so she would still be able to see her childhood friends all the time. toadsworth, after carefully calculating how much the castle spent on what type of maintenance and how much time was spent working on those tasks, eventually named mario and luigi as the royal plumbers.

though it was not glamorous, they did their jobs happily and without complaint. bowser eventually becomes king and starts to leave them alone for awhile... until he doesnt.

bowser has an army and he actually knows what to do with it now. while mario and luigi are working, he takes the castle by surprise

and thats where smb1 begins

ok gn

[sillylittlelemon]

hehe hi im the anon from the first saiki kusuo matchup and i would love it if i could hear your in-depth thoughts on how it would be like for me and saiki 😭 ilysm btw u made my day <3333

Nuh-uh Anon, YOU made MY day

So there. lmao

But yes ofc! This one will probably take me longer because i want to do it super good, but i promise i'lldo my best to finish it promptly! <333

Omg anon im so sorry this took so long i love you i swear

Saiki headcanons

Like i said (or did i say? I think i said) Kusuo doesnt do bugs. You know this, i know this, everyone KNOWS this, so like- man up and get that spider the fuck away from him what the fuck are youdoing? Whyare you so slow? What do you mean youre scared?! Hurry up- OHMYGODITSMOVINGKEBCDZKCBSS

An actual conversation youve had. He didnt talk to you for roughly 29 hours after (he only relented when you showed him the fancy coffee jelly you got him)

We know he has an aversion to physical touch, but i feel like a while he sort of just does it on autopilot. Like- a hand on your lower back to redirect you in a crowd so you dont bump into that man thats about to run past, a hand slipping into yours when he can hear you starting to get overwhelmed by the crowd (or juzt Teruhashi bc that girl is a whole mess). Maybe an absent minded side hug when he gets distracted by something stupid his (totally not) friends are doing. Just fleeting, light touches for a while, then he slowly relents and lets you cuddle him. (Cue him stiff as a board as you hug him from behind as you guys lay and watch his show)

He never forgets ANYTHING. At all. Anniversaries, birthdays, firsts, nothing slips past him. His mind is a steel trap for dates. He remembers the exact SHADE of your favorite color as you point to it in a fleeting moment while you two walk. He remembers the way you smile as you pass your favorite flowers in a shop window, he just knows. And he acts all 'oh i dont care', he cares. That hobby you mentioned that you wanted to try in passing like 2 months ago? He has the basic supplies wrapped and in a box, ready for your birthday in a week.

I feel like jealousy can go either way with him- a) totally chill because he can literally read your mind and he KNOWS you arent interested in that dufus or b) completely irrational

So- lets say scenario a.

Some guy or girl is flirting with you (bc you a baddie no matter your preference) and he's watching, tempted to be amused as he watches them fumble at your outright bored look, stuttering over their words, face flushing and you just standing there like '🤨 spit it out? I have better things to do? Dont you see me clinging to my scrumptious boyfriend? Shoo fly, dont bother me.' And he can hear your inner complaints and he actually mearly cracks a smile at it, turning his face away to hide the subtle smirk

However- scenario b is a different story. Imagine this person is pushier, maybe they got a little.... handsy.

Oh no. No way in HELL is that sliding, okay? Youre clearly uncomfortable and youve told this guy/girl no more than once. My man is seething. Okay? Furious. Who do they think they are? Who gave them the right to lay a single one of their twisted, grimy, heathen fingers on you-. It literally takes the feel of your hand on his to realize he had shattered the phone in his hand. Said person is now scrambling to leave, a totel mess as they eye your downright terrifying twink looking boyfriend with enough hidden strength to shatter a phone. (After this was the forst time you... yknow)

[sobredunia]

Hey u should tell me oc lore ok? ok we can exchange oc lore like uh. uhm. like. we can exchange. like telling stories around a campfire yeah thats it. yeah. yay

okay so i started writing this and then i had to go to sleep and now that I wake up in the morning tumblr has eaten the entire fucking ask. thankfully i decided to copypaste it on a drive folder but fucking christ i did a lot of text and tumblr eated it all and didnt even care :(

This started out remotely normal and I ended up writing it like fanfiction lmao

(TW: cannibalism (?), death, mentions of alcohol consumption)

Okay so there's this guy named Charcoal, he's a fox that can turn into a human :D. He's been alive for a very long time, causing mischief be it through good actions or bad actions just to see what would happen. Although he can easily blend in with the humans, he changes his aspect to show more fox-like features just to see how they'd react. Most of the towns he's been in either consider him a small god to pray and make offers to or a threat that needs to be eliminated (but he's always faster, always smarter. he knows humans all too well)

The years pass and pass, and he's decided that he's gonna enter this one city looking like a starved and sad teenage boy, trying to see if these humans are foolish enough that they'll treat him kindly

They don't

He begs for money on the streets and no one gives him anything. He begs for food in restaurants that are about to take out the trash and no one gives him anything. He begs other homeless people to make space for one more in their makeshift huts and no one does

The bigger the city, the ruder the people, he's noticed

Eventually, he just pickpockets someone and goes to a random bar to get at least a bit happy before sleeping somewhere as a fox. He'll go to a different city tomorrow

"Are you sure you're old enough for a drink?"

The bar is run by an old man that looks like he should've retired more than a decade ago

This was the most compassion Charcoal had been shown in the entire city, so he decided he'd try to play his role just a bit more

"Psh- of course!" He says in a tone that makes it seem like he's lying, and then slides the coins he stole over to him

The old man frowns, before going under the bar and pouring the drink he had asked for, and then retrieving the coins

He takes a sip, and notices that it's a non alcoholic drink. Still, he technically gave him what he asked for, so he can't complain. He can appreciate a fellow trickster

The two engage in conversation, Charcoal coming up with a sob story about how he's an orphan that escaped a cruel orphanage and is now looking for refuge in an unknown part of the city. He also sees how the old man engages with the other clients, remembering their names and preferred drinks and how much they had all drank, knowing when to stop pouring them glasses. Despite some rude and some annoying customers, the old man dealt with them with patience and appropriate responses, and he always gave a listening ear to any who needed them. Charcoal was definitely impressed

Once everyone had had their fill, the old man shooed them out, all but Charcoal

He offered him a job and a place to stay, living in his house that was over the bar and working as a barista or when he wasn't able to work due to age

"Isn't it illegal to work while you're this old?"

"As long as none of the clients snitch, it doesn't matter. And it's not like you're living a very lawful life yourself"

He cackled. "You got me there"

When Charcoal went to sleep, he decided he'd keep up the bit for just a few more days, just to see what it's like to be a bartender, and maybe snatch all the money in the register once he bails out and goes someplace else

He did not, in fact, stay there for "just a few more days"

He hated to admit it, but he'd actually grown attached to that old man and the barista lifestyle. It was fun listening to stories and breaking or starting fights. He also began to gradually change his appearance, to simulate the concept of growing up. When the old man began to teach him how to pour and mix drinks and what the regulars' preferences were, it genuinely felt like an honor, and his days of aimless wandering and pranks and thievery were long behind him

And then tragedy struck

The old man had a heart attack

He had actually written a will. A will where he left everything he had to Charcoal, the closest thing he'd ever had to family

It actually hurt

He actually wanted to cry

He had been alive for years and years, and this was the one time he had cared so much about someone. Not as a human, but as a person

He decided he'd continue running the bar, to honor him

He wasn't so sure why he did that so determined. But he did

But it wasn't the same without him there

He started to lose regulars and newcomers alike, leaving the bar nearly empty most nights

On a rather populated night, though, he met a certain someone

Someone like him

An animal that could turn into a human

A hare. Chalk was his name

He looked like any other person, although he was rather insistent on keeping his hat on

They didn't recognise eachother for what they were. Not right away, anyway. It was only when he saw a bit of a hare ear poking out from under the hat that he realised

They hit it off right away after that, happy to not be the only ones. Charcoal offered a job as a bartender, like the old man had done all those years ago. He took it, because why not

He was far far younger than him, in his 20s. He still had that bit of respect for human rules and didn't view them as distanced from him as Charcoal did. It was probably a thing that came with age. There were still plenty of humans older than him, after all, and he had next to no life experience

Money wasn't exactly an issue. If they wanted, they could just steal some, but Charcoal knew that's not what the old man would have wanted. He wanted to try living clean. For at least a while. But the bar just kept on losing clients

And then, the straw that broke the camel's back

Charcoal was out in the back, about to throw a trash bag into the larger container, when he noticed something in it

A corpse

A young woman's corpse

He panicked. Someone must've dumped her there after killing her

He couldn't let the body be discovered here. If it did, it would be the final nail in the coffin for the bar, and they would have to close it for good. No one wants to go drink in a place where they murdered a young lady

So, in a panic, he retrieved the corpse and put it inside the bar, locking the door

Chalk panicked when he entered the kitchen and saw the scene

"What the fuck did you do!?"

Charcoal hurriedly explained the scene and the consequences this would have for the establishment if she was found here

"S-so, you want to move her someplace else?"

"No, we can't risk it getting traced to here. Then we'll get in even bigger trouble for having moved it"

"Then what do you suggest we do!?"

"..."

Charcoal took a cleaver and chopped up the body, before turning his mouth into that of a fox, and eating desperately

Charcoal could only watch in horror as his friend ate a human like a rabid beast, turning his hands into claws to rip apart the flesh better

Eventually, he finally stopped being locked in place and left to fill up as a bartender for the two clients they had. Luckily, both of them were too drunk to notice anything. Chalk shooed them out before going back to the kitchen. It was a mess. So was Charcoal. He was too busy licking the bones clean to notice him coming back. Or even leaving in the first place

They cut up the bones even more, before keeping them in a plastic bag to turn into stew later. Things like the skull or the hips were grinded up beyond recognition and thrown out through drains, sinks and toilets, and the two silently agreed to never speak about this again

Besides, they just had to wait around 30 years until the case went cold. What's that to someone who's lived for far longer than that?

At least Charcoal could say that. Chalk was still very disturbed by the whole ordeal. He couldn't really blame him

They pretended not to care when they started seeing the missing person posters

[theravencawsatmidnight]

I loved your fortnite one! May I request?

(The best place to get the lore is to look it up on the fortnite wiki, but heres a summary of Agent Jones lol)

Agent Jones works for the (now defunct) Imagined Order, the company that oversees the Zero point/loop. Jones betrayed the IO when they didn't try and save the Zero point, instead choosing to flee.

The reason that Jones joined the IO was to protect his family, nobody knows what planet / reality he's from. If he leaves the IO, his family will die without the protection.

Anyone who works in Island Loop control (like Jones) doesn't just get full medical care, they get given immortality.

So Jones would slave forever to protect his bloodline. If it wasn't for the Zero point trying to explode that is.

I did not mean to write that lot!

I was wondering do you have any yandere headcannons for him? If not then that's fine :)

TYSM FOR THE RQ AND INFO !!!! Ill do my best ^^ hope u enjoy.

Forever Mine…

🌹 Agent Jonsey was immortal like everyone else. It was boring to him, no death, nothing to look forward too , not that death was something to look forward too. But he was bored. Some days he just wanted to loosen his tie and.. have fun

🌹When Jonsey learned you were joining his team he was interested. Friendly chit chatting in the beginning , he would help with whatever you needed, it was nice at first. Until it got out of hand .

🌹little notes, lunches, personal space.. Jonesy sometimes would brush against you when he walked by , just to hear that little surprised yelp you did, the way you jumped just enough to get a little bounce from your chest. He loved it.

🌹whenever you mentioned his family he would wave his hands in the air shooing the question away like a annoying fly. “They are fine” he told you over and over. “Lets talk about you” he instead , “i wanna know all about you ya know?” He was persistent …sometimes not taking no for an answer.

🌹Jonesy started to corner you now when it was just you and him. His broad shoulders and tense arms made it hard to sneak away. “Bunny…” he would say under hitched breath, “i dont know what it is, about you. I cant explain it” Jonesy was a family man, he loved them… but all he wanted now was you

🌹He had grown impatient now, watching you rush away from him after work was completed , he had to take you while he had the chance. So he made up a story that someone had gotten hurt from the storm, and just like the good bunny you were you ran to help them. Thats when everything went dark

🌹He had pictures up in the room you found yourself in. His family. You tried to stand up but the heavy chains around your wrists made it hard. You were chained to the floor in this empty cold room.

🌹He told you it was to remind himself of his real life, his happy life . “Dont get confused bunny , im just as happy with them as i am with you, but i have to return to them too. They already love me. And soon you will too”

🌹His dull dull life was over, immortality was not so bad now. He finally had a reason. .. to loosen that tired tie.

[hacksawboy]

pin remake... whoops

hello my name is max (any neopronouns or he/him !). former saw 3 #1 hater, hoffpilled strahmcel, and leigh whannell's number one fan. autism has done its thing and i have a lot of thoughts on postal 3 now. i run this blog

im autistic n currently hyperfixated on half life! im not too active currently, but when i am heres what i repost: happy tree friends, POSTAL, the binding of isaac. my blog is extremely reblog heavy, please keep this in mind!

im 18 years old!!! im fine with anyone following me regardless of age just dont be weird !!! ^_^ id also prefer if enstars fans didnt interact, im sorry most of you just like old posts and remind me of shit i dont want to remember.

general blog cws: gore, suggestive content (nothing outright nsfw however), the f slur (reclaimed), the n word (reclaimed). i do not like to censor myself in my own spaces, and will no longer be tagging slur usage for posts that i dont intend for many people to see. i do not tag gore, and all gore i repost is not real.

this blog is not safe for the school shooter fandom genuinely go fucking off yourself. i dont care if thats harsh youre disgusting (having a casual interest in tragic events and the psychology behind them is fine, glorifying and making fanart of murderers is not.)

if you wanna know more about me i have a strawpage too . its super cool . ok its not as bad as my carrd butttt its just a template. also still no goodbye almond eyes... check it out anyways:

heres a contemporary goodbye almond eyes to compensate the lack of it on the strawpage btw (as if the postt isnt cluttered enough right):

also heres an underrated song listen if u like rock or metal

anyways i think thats it. ciao. byebye. SHOO!!!!

[polyfrag-kero]

(vent)

i hate living here

yesterday our "mother" was going over the side effects of our medicine and mentioned how one of them is tinnitus. i recently told her about us having tinnitus. she tried to say that our medicine was causing it, and when i told her that we've quite literally had tinnitus for years (we never told her because of how she reacts), she raised her voice and started saying "oh thats some bullshit, get the fuck out of here, you have NOT had tinnitus for years" and shooed me away

this is EXACTLY why we never tell her anything until it's too late. she never believes us

the same thing happened with our chronic pain. she took us to a doctor years ago for it and the doctor (who didn't even let me finish my sentences) claimed that we just needed to work out more and that it was just caused by isolation during covid??? he blamed it on us, saying we hadn't been moving around enough, when its so much more than that. i shouldn't have had to struggle to pick up a plastic water bottle. but of course, mother agreed with him. so later on when i complained that i PHYSICALLY COULD BARELY MOVE FROM THE PAIN AND FATIGUE, she just said "the doctor said nothing was wrong! you just need to work out more" while smiling (she smiles when talking if she thinks shes right) and pretty much dismissed me. when i told her i wanted to start using my cane again, she said "oh stop being so dramatic, you don't need that" (she loves calling us dramatic, she does it almost every day)

oh, and of course there was the time we were diagnosed with asd (back in highschool), and she made our school test us. it came back negative, just like every other test they'd given us (cause that hs SUCKED with diagnoses, all our friends with autism were diagnosed with anxiety), so now she refuses to believe it, EVEN THOUGH MULTIPLE PROFESSIONALS AGREE THAT WE ARE AUTISTIC

not even to mention the time she put her hands on me after i turned 18 during a severe ptsd episode because she didnt care/believe i was triggered (i was too scared to call the cops then, i would in a heartbeat now)

i just, hate living here

- 🐀

[life-love-and-lotr]

@chaos-in-bright-pink-hair-dyes Killjoys Week 2023 Day 2- Smoke

Smoking was banned within Battery City. It was considered an unclean pastime that only damaged the lungs of its hardworking citizens. But Frank had already decided that scarred lungs were worth the freedom he felt when smoking, so made his weekly trip to the black market to buy a packet.

This time the trip took 10 times longer than it usually did due to the abnormal drac patrols polluting the streets. It wasn't unusual to see the masked figures, but the sheer numbers were concerning. The only time that they came down in such numbers was when there was a break-in (or out) in the middle of the city. And that always ended in chaos.

Frank pondered the mystery as he walked, taking his time to not get caught. He ended up in the familiar warehouse that held the market. Illegal weapons, android parts, and medications, all ready for purchase. The target for Frank was a man who only went by the name Horseshoe Crab. His attire, an all red ensamble complete with top hat, made it pretty obvious that he was a killjoy. A killjoy who always had a knack for getting out of sticky situations. If anyone here knew what had happend, it would be him.

"Hey Horseshoe. Were you the reason why there are so many drac patroles out? Seems like something you would do."

The older man, looking mockingly shocked at the accusation, stuck his hands in the air in defeat.

"What do you mean? I would never do anything to rile up the pigs. How very dare you. Seriously though, it wasn't any of the Suitehearts. From what I heard, two of the top Scarecrows sons just escaped the city. They have become true killjoys now. Good for them thats what I think. Anyway, want your usual?"

Frank had to blink away the sudden reilisation from his eyes. His mother had two brothers come through her transition house just two days ago. They looked too clean and scared half to death. The youngest didnt look much older than 8, the oldest being the same age as Frank. She had shooed him away from the room when helping them, then sent them away faster than most. She must have known how important they were.

"Thanks. Hey, tell Doctor B we might need more medication. That breakout is gonna cause hell on the voluenteers. And I know mom will wanna be prepared when shit hits the fan"

"Will do. Be careful out there. They are getting more dangorus every passing day. Wouldn't want to bury my best customer now would I?"

Frank did his best to squirm his way out of Horse Shoes inevitable head rub, messing up his sholder-length hair. No matter how hard he tried to be a sarcastic asshole, he always ended up just being a true Suiteheart.

"You to. I don't wan't my favourite dealer to go completly out the window do I?"

After handing the credits over Frank left, a single pack of cigarettes in his hand. He waited until he got to his usual quiet smoking place before pulling one out. He was able to climb through a slot in the wall surrounding the city and perch upon the top. It looked out onto the desert, a beautiful sandy expanse that Frank could only dream of getting to. Just like the two mystery boys.

As he lit the cigarette, he thought about them. How they were just left to learn the desert on their own. He worried about them as the length of the nic stick shortened. And as the final smoke cloud breifly covered his view, he considered what it would be like if he left. Nobody would care enough to send an army to bring him back and he sure as hell wouldn't have a transition house to go through. His mum would string him up by the neck if he even asked to leave.

A sudden noise pulled Frank away from his contemplation. He didn't even get the chance to stamp out his cigarette before his vision flashed white. As he was pulled away from the safest place he knew, the packet fell to the floor. The last reminder of the boy he used to be

[denako]

🧚‍♂️If you decide to read this i do not guaranteed that youll get out of it brain damage free🧚‍♂️

Aka the worst thing I've ever wrote

:)

This is jotawes for those 5 people that ship it, also theres a "smutty" scene but written in the most nonsexy way possible

Also i wrote this 3 years ago so... Yeah

A love story i guess

"Hey dade!!!" Yelled jelen, the music was way too loud, she couldnt even hear her own thoughts.

"Oh! Hey Joleane, whats updog??"

"Not much, whachu doin here?" She asked. Not even knowing why she was speaking with her father in the first place.

"Chillin', but i was thinking bout goin home, an old fart like me has no rights to be at a party full of young horny people! Thats against the rules." He said sounding older than ever.

"Gonna take weather with me doe, hes old too. im afraid his old crusty bones will fall apart if he isnt careful enough" Joutaro added.

"Oh" exclaimed Jelean, a sour face painted on her face 👀🦷🦷😈.

"Ok den!!"

"You sound like you want me gone daughter!!" Jorato said with a bitter tone😠😠.

"NO FATHER i would never do such a thing, i am also afraid that your old bones will fall apart."

"Ok then, enjoy the rest of the party"

"Ok"

JOTERO left with weather report to do old man stuff at his home. JOLENA was glad that her old man was taking care of himself, she really wouldnt want to clean up his crusty dusty musty bones if he died.

Jolenaen continued being gay and dancing to the trash music playing on the speakers..

But then out of nowhere a group of girlies swarmed her. They were everywhere clawing at her like cats claw de... The thing... What do u call it?... The thing on the window.

IT DOESN'T MATTER OK.

She did not understand what was going on. When a group of girlies swarm her like this, they usually want to get closer to her. But not now. They were asking questions about her father.

What

They were asking for his number and stuff. She didnt know why as she didnt have the dilf eye. .

(The dilf e)

She shooed them away, there was no way she was going to give them the number of her gayass father. (She did not know he was a gayass)

She was going furious as some of the girliepops returned trying their luck again. But to no avail. Jolena was very stubborn and was not planning on leaking the personal details of her fathers credit card number to some random lady.

She then went and commited a few war crimes, just to spice up the night. She was now wanted in 13 European countries.

But then the girliers returned, she had no way to fight them and she succumbed to their voices squeaking like the goddamn rubber chickens.

Back at jootas house he was hitting that evil vvizard vveed with wes "weather report" bluemarine.

(Pictr of evil vvizard vveed)

They were both fucked up on the vveed. If jolana figured out he was doing this behind her back she would probably take and crumple him like a piece of paper. Then smoke him like he was doing with the vveed right now.

Out of nowhere Wes said " hey džotaro my dude, what about the funny... will we commit the funny today??"

"Oh, of course we will my evil vveather vvizard!"

There was silence for a moment, then joteroad continued "Thats why i took you here in the first place!"

"Ok then... So uh.. when will we start😳😳"

"How the fuck did you say that with your mouth?????"

Instead of an answer there was silence.

"Whatever... We will start once im done with this vveed"

"Ok then"

But unfortunately Jotroad was an extremely slow smoker, so finishing a single vveed took him about an hour.

In this time Wes smoked 7 vveeds.

He was so fucked up he could smell the colors.

"Ok im done😀"

Wes looked at him with his third eye 👁️.

Suddenly completely sober.

"Ok"

They started commiting the funny intercourse. It was very good and funny

.

They were... NAKED EWWWWW, but thats the harsh truth of commiting the funny crime.

"Oh yes my beloved, i am arriving" wes switched into being bri'ish for some reason.

Then he arrived.

The funny crime has been committed, they were now on an fbi watchlist.

Wes collapsed on the very moist joterod. He had no more energy. Very tired boy he was now.

They were laying on the couch in the living room, but jerotad didnt see any problem with this. He forgor 💀 that Jolenan actually lives with him, after being kicked out out of her previous home, because they found that saint jesus vveed in her apartment.

But still, she was probably gonna end up sleeping over at one of her gay ass friends house.

But THEN... OUT OF NOWHERE SHE BURSTS THROUGH THE DOOR

OH FUCK

ALL OF THEM PANIC, joleaned starts scratching her eyes out and screeching at the top of her lungs as he accidentally saw weathers naked dusty ass.

"WHAT THE FUXK DAD{€¶€÷{`{€" SHE YELLS.

"Fucking dont look then bitch" Joteroded calmed down really fast because he was still high from that vvizard vveed.

" I fucking cant see now, i have no eyes" jolanda yells as she holds her eyes in her palms like that dude from pans labyrinth.

"Sucks to suck" says wes, his ass still completely naked and crusty

"Yeah and go sleep večerníček is already over"

"Of course papà" jolened leaves like the very obedient child she is.

"Very well then" retorts wes

"娘指ェ州の時期日起再去拿" says joterodesad and then they both fall asleep.

Jolene ends up screaming the entire night 😊😊.

The end🌈

Hope you didn't enjoy���

[bumblyburg]

ted lasso finale thoughts

Need the richmond women's team spinoff NOW!!!!!!!!!!! And it better have LESBIANS i swear to god!!!!!!!

As always the strongest part of this ep was the team dynamics. Roy joining the diamond dogs. Isaac with the penalty kick!!!! The fucking dance sequence callback T^T theres no place like afc richmond <3 Them winning the match but losing the whole thing was a good balance of success vs realism. I didn't know enough about football to predict it beforehand LOL but that probably worked in my favor bc i genuinely didnt know whether they would win or lose. Rebecca and ted's friendship was heartwarming as always. I was living in fear that they'd become a couple even though i knew that wasn't what the writers were going for, so I probably need to rewatch to fully enjoy it.

Tedependent lost RIP. it would have made sense but at the same time im kinda glad they didn't, at least this season. trent was still very much a side character and i just don't think the story beats were there for tedtrent endgame. the story would have had to been constructed differently, or it would need another season. I also liked how the main focus was ted & rebecca's friendship rather than either of their romantic relationships. I love a good romance but its not what this story is about.

Thats part of the reason why the dutchman return felt cheap to me lol. Sorry rebecca im always rooting for you but i just wasn't feeling it. Another part of that is probably because Ted and Trent had a much stronger foundation and we still didn't get to see even their friendship develop as much as i would have liked. Maybe ive been spoiled by all the trent this season idk. but i was just hoping for a little more. After all, it's not lost on me that we only got one confirmed gay couple at the end (we don't even know anything about Michael!!! Ugh sorry Im a michael hater he's so boring.)

Speaking of boring, I simply do not care about ted's family. So him moving back was... not really compelling for me. like none of the kansas characters are fleshed out at all. i wish they had done something more interesting with them so i could actually get invested. There was something there with michelle dating their couples therapist, but it ended up falling flat imo. Also Michelle being a teacher is a total copout, I would have preferred if she had an unexpected job that revealed a new side to her. Give her a personality outside of being a wife/mother/caretaker please and thank you.

I did like how Royjamie was left openended!!! thats the ship i care most abt and i knew it wasnt going to *actually* happen so im satisfied with what we got. I am in the (im assuming) minority of royjamie enjoyers that is against roykeeleyjamie. This episode really hammered it in why roy and jamie are not good for keeley LOL, but the signs have been there all along. Keeley needs to be her own boss for a bit! Roy and jamie are just not at her maturity level (lovingly), and they've got some misogyny to work through.

(I need to think on it more, but I'm pretty sure that I liked the way this episode/season handled the Roy And Jamie Are Lowkey Sexist subplot. Like the whole fighting over a woman thing is soooo trite atp, and i still dont know how i feel about them physically fighting over her or whatever. but the story was realistic about how these asshole male footballers are going to have some weird views about women, while still shutting that down those views. like not even giving them the time of day. Keeley literally shoos them out without a word LMAO. So idk need to think about it more but at least keeley didnt end up with either of them).

Hey you know who DOES deserve each other.... and makes each other better people, as represented by their football training arc.... the student is the teacher and the teacher is the student etc etc…… Anyways royjamie is real TO ME!!! (And brett goldstein and phil dunster, number one royjamie warriors. phil dunster wrote royjamie smut I will never get over that)

Overall im sad to see ted lasso go. i think i need to sit with all 3 seasons a bit more before forming my full opinion, but s1 will always have my heart. Mostly because evil jamie and evil rebecca are so so fun to watch.