#i cant get them out of my head for a MONTH
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im a mail carrier. i work in a smallish town outside of a major us city on the east coast. my office has 24 routes, and only 16 full time regular carriers. i work 6 days a week. im supposed to get a rotating drop day as my second day off every week, but we dont have enough staff to cover my route and i get forced to come in more often than not. that article is talking about retirement buy outs, where if you are close to meeting the retirement thresholds you can take a slightly lesser pension but retire sooner. so while no one is getting fired, people are being pressured into taking the buyout and just not being replaced. its going to be a problem in my home office soon, there’s a couple of guys that are getting up to 30 years of service and are starting to get pushed into retiring early. im the first new carrier my office has gotten in over a year and a half. we don’t have the people to fill the open spots we already have. management can claim its about cutting costs all they want, but instead of paying one guy 8 hours to work, you end up paying out 7 hours of extra work onto everyone else, which accounting for overtime is paid like its 10 hours.
also fuck dejoy. hes out here in this article calling uniform funds and workers comp mismanaged?
dude i have been off probabtion for two months, and i still haven’t gotten my uniform allowance yet. i walk 13 miles on my route, i completely wore through my first pair of boots in four months from brand new to the soles being paper thin. green tag postal shoes cost 200 bucks a pair. i cant pay that out of pocket. also? idk who the fuck dejoy is looking at when hes talking about workmans comp, bc i know pleanty of people who work through sprains and pulled muscles and everything you can possibly treat with tylenol. bc unless you get hurt on the job by god litteraly smacking you upside the head in full view of your superviser, they will try and blame your injury on you. i even know someone with like some repetitive strain injury in her shoulder who is getting our shop steward involved bc management is arguing that its a not stretching properly problem and not a side effect of casing mail for 10 years problem. the usps reports more severe injuries than any other employer but its hell to try and get any comp for them
support your local postal workers. carriers and clerks and mail handlers do a lot of good work. if you ever have issues with getting misorted mail delivered or not having mail forwarded correctly, its not because they dont care enough to do their jobs, its likely due to overwork and understaffing. a lot of people still rely on physical mail as their primary form of communication. a lot of older people’s only daily interaction with others is when their mail carrier comes by. everyone ive met so far in this jobs cares alot. were just struggling to keep our heads above water when management is voting to encourage drowing
call your government officials and tell them to support the postal service. buy stamps, from a physical post office if possible. if you have to ship anything, check usps pricing since we are not a business, we are a service, and we are often the cheapest option.
and as for what to tell conservative family members - the usps is the third largest employer in the country, with over half a million employees. 15% of the usps is made up of veterans, triple the national average. in some states like alaska, hawaii, and nevada, a third of the postal service is made up of veterans. to be anti postal service is to be anti veteran and anti america
(sorry if this got long and rambly, i wrote it on the way home form my 12 hour day of delivering mail)
Next time you're around when the mail gets delivered, ask your delivery person if they're understaffed or not.
But don't hold them up too much, they have a lot of work to do.

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THIS IS WHY WE CANT HAVE NICE THINGS
*extended version (tumblr deleted half of the og post idk why)
pairing: max verstappen x singer reader
summary: the one in the wake of reputation, people begin to forget and a new story is written
warning: ill come back to it (i didn't but theirs nothing just vague mentions of past mental health issues and online hate)
a/n: adding to this has given me so much nostalgia omg
face claim: sabrina carpenter
f1 masterlist
main masterilst
series masterlist
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yourusername to celebrate a month as billboards no. 1 album, ready for it...? mv out now
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The atmosphere of the set was buzzing with energy, y/n sitting in the directors set as she watched the chaos in front of her unfold. Her makeup artist was adding the final bits of eyeshadow to her smokey eye as y/n rewatched some old takes of a scene. Max watched, slightly awkwardly, from the side, a soft smile on his face, his reflection expressing awe.
From the corner of her eye Y/n could see him staring at her and turned to face him with a playful smirk, "How do I look?"
"Like your about to break the internet." Max said, a little smirk on his face though his eyes shone with pride.
She rolled her eyes, laughing. "You say that every time."
"Because it’s true every time," Max shot back, his grin widening.
As she went to get up Max kissed her shoulder quickly before letting her get to work. She laughed slightly at the simple display of affection before whispering in his ear, "You're my good luck charm, Verstappen." He watched as she ran off, intensely aware of the box that sat heavily in his pocket.
"Just don't forget me when you're topping the charts Schatje."
Before the cameras started rolling Y/n made eye contact with Max from the set, mouthing an I love you.
(this was set before they got engaged just an fyi)
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yourusername GETAWAY CAR MV IS OUT NOW <3
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Y/n felt very secure, hidden away in her trailer which was only illuminated by the soft glow of fairly lights strung along the edges of her mirror. She lay on the couch going through her storyboard, Max on top of her, weight heavy. His head rested on her chest as his hand absentmindedly played with the hem of her top, occasionally pressing kissing against her stomach.
“Shouldn’t you be getting ready for your cameo, Mr. Superstar?” she teased, glancing down at him with a playful smirk.
Max grinned up at her, his eyes twinkling with a mischievous sparkle. “I am ready. My job is just to stand there and look good, right?”
“Pretty much,” Y/n quipped, running her fingers gently through his hair. “And don’t forget to smolder. That’s very important.”
Max chuckled, closing his eyes as he leaned into her touch. “I’ll smolder for you and only you, liefde.”
The door to the trailer creaked open, and y/ns assistant peeked in. “Y/n, five minutes to set.”
“Got it,” she replied, her fingers pausing briefly in Max’s hair. The PA disappeared, leaving them in their little bubble of quiet.
“You’re gonna kill it,” Max murmured, his voice soft but sure. He sat up, leaning forward to cup her face with both hands. “Every time I see you work, I fall for you all over again.”
Y/n’s cheeks flushed, and she let out a small laugh. “You’re ridiculous, you know that?”
“Ridiculously in love with you,” he replied, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead, then her nose, then her lips. “Now go show everyone why you’re the star.”
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y/nsprivate someweirdo took over my trailer and started hogging everything
y/nsfuturehusband HEY THATS NOT NICE!!!
-> y/nsprivate KIDDING AND I LOVE AND THANK YOU AND I LOVE YOU
-> y/nsfuturehusband CALL ME RN PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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yourusername SNL! What a dream, thank youuu <3
maxverstappen1 🖤
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The soft hum of the TV filled the quiet apartment, but Y/n wasn’t really watching. She sat curled up on the couch, knees drawn to her chest, her fingers absentmindedly tugging at the loose threads of her hoodie. Her eyes were fixed on nothing in particular as her mind raced with negative thoughts and memories she wished she could forget.
Max walked in from the kitchen, holding two mugs of tea. His smile faded the second he noticed her expression. Setting the mugs down on the coffee table, he knelt in front of her, his hands gently covering hers to still their nervous movements.
“Liefde,” he said softly, his voice laced with concern, “what’s going on?”
She shook her head, biting her lip as tears welled up in her eyes. “I don’t even know how to explain it,” she whispered.
Max’s heart ached at the sight of her like this. He slid onto the couch beside her, wrapping his arms around her tightly, as if he could shield her from the ghosts of her past. “You don’t have to explain it,” he murmured. “You don’t have to do anything. Just let me be here for you.”
Y/n let out a shaky breath as she buried her face in his chest, her tears soaking into his shirt. “I hate feeling like this,” she admitted, her voice muffled. “Like I’m broken or something.”
“You’re not broken,” Max said firmly, pulling back just enough to tilt her chin up so she’d look at him. His blue eyes were filled with unwavering determination. “You’re strong, Y/n. Stronger than you know. What you’ve been through doesn’t define you. You’ve come so far, and I’m so proud of you for that.”
A small sob escaped her, and Max wiped a tear from her cheek with his thumb. “And when it feels too heavy,” he continued softly, “lean on me. You don’t have to carry it all by yourself. We’re a team, remember?”
She nodded, her grip on him tightening. “Thank you, Max. For always being here.”
He pressed a kiss to her temple, resting his cheek against her hair. “Always, liefde. You’re stuck with me.” He whispered softly, playing with the ring on her finger.
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yourusername some bts of life recently
maxverstappen1 GORGEOUS 🖤
francisca.cgomes IM OBSESSED WITH YOU
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yourusername MRS & MR VERSTAPPEN - 24/11/25.
maxverstappen1 couldn't be happier to call you my wife
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Y/n smiled as she watched her now husband chatting animatedly to Charles and his girlfriend, maxplaining as she liked to call it. She took a final sip of champagne and went to put it down, not expecting Lando to be hovering near her.
Y/n and Max had made the joint decision to invite Lando to their wedding, on the premise that he didn't start anything. They wanted to start a life together and part of that meant leaving any past conflict behind them. Y/n and Max had both moved forwards, she only hoped Lando had done the same.
"Hey Y/nn." He said softly, smiling at her with an unfamiliar look in his eyes. "Sorry I didn't mean to sneak up on you like that."
She smiled, laughing slightly, "You're good Lando, really."
"I'm sorry for everything else as well. I know that you've moved on and I'm happy for you I really am. But you deserve a genuine apology." Lando said, clearing his voice roughly before continuing. "You were amazing, you were perfect to me and I should've trusted you, I think I always knew you were telling the truth but their was this huge part of me that was just looking to jump ship, and I think their always will be part of me that will. I suck at relationships, I suck at trust. But that is no excuse for how I treated you, I was a dickhead and I am truly sorry, I will regret everything for the rest of my life."
"I forgive you Lando," She said, causing his head to snap up. "I think I forgave you a long time ago, and as shit as everything was, I wouldn't change it for anything. We had our time, but we were young and stupid and if everything hadn't happened I wouldn't be where I am now, happy, married to the love of my life, I even got a couple of Grammy nominations from it all so it hasn't been to rough."
"Yeah congratulations by the way, I always knew that you could do it, but now everyone else can see how talented you are as well." He said, a genuine smile on his head, the pair moved to stare out from the balcony. He cleared his throat, moving to speak up again, "Do you think we could've had this, if things hadn't of gone the way they did?"
"No." Y/n said softly, "I mean maybe I'm wrong and things could've worked out, but I think eventually we would've found some other reason to break up. We never loved each other the way Max and I love each other and love isn't supposed to be difficult, yes you go through your ups and downs, but you shouldn't ever be waiting for the other shoe to drop."
Lando sighed, rubbing his eyes, flinching slightly when a gentle hand was placed on his arm. "She's out their for you Lando, you might not think it now, but one day you'll meet the one, maybe you already have, and she will love you unconditionally." She pulled her hand from his arm, leaving goosebumps in its wake.
Y/n jumped slightly at the feeling of a possessive arm wrapping itself around her back. She melted into the familiar touch of her now husband. "Max." She murmured as he kissed her cheek, "Not in front of people."
Max looked up at Lando, smiling brightly at him although it didn't quite reach his eyes. "Lando." He nodded.
"Max, congratulations." He said awkwardly, averting his eyes from the overly affectionate Max. "I'm gonna go..." He trailed off, walking away from the loved up couple.
Once Lando was out of earshot Y/n hit Max aggressively. "Max Verstappen."
"What?" He questioned almost guiltily.
"You terrible." She said, laughing slightly as the man twirled her around before pulling her into a kiss.
"Just wanted to show him what's mine." He murmured, looking into her eyes before peppering kisses all over her face. "As if the wedding isn't enough."
"Not even close Mijn Vrouw."
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Y/n laughed as Max pulled her into his chest before lifting her up. "Max be careful." She said as he carried her into their hotel room.
"You. Look. Extravagant." His said to her between kisses. "Words can not describe how happy I am right now." He placed her on the bed before opening his phone.
"What are you doing?" She questioned as a familiar tune made its way through the room. "Its our song." She said, smiling brightly and Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You started playing.
"Can I have this dance?" He asked holding out his hand for her. She laughed at him lightly. "We've already danced tonight Max."
"Yeah with hundreds of eyes on us, I want to dance, just me and my beautiful, amazing wife." Max said smiling down at her.
"You're so cute." Y/n said, looking up into his eyes, "What did I ever do to deserve you?"
"Just being you. You deserve the world Mijn liefje, and I'll do my best to give it too you." He said before pulling her into a kiss.
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"And this years Album of the Year is..." Olivia paused, dramatically opening her envelop, "Reputation, Y/n L/n." Y/n felt all of her anxiety melt away as she heard her name being called out, max rubbing his thumb comfortingly on her back.
As she made her way onto the stage she wiped a stray tear away, smiling at the room in front of her. "This, this is insane I can't believe I'm here. Um, a few years ago I didn't think I'd ever get the chance to do this again and now um now I'm up here and it's all because of you. Thank you, thank you the fans for continuing to support me and believe in my even when I didn't believe in myself. Thank you to my friends who pulled my out of my hole and continue to push me every single day. And thank you to my rock, my safe place, Max, who held my hand through every moment I wanted to give up. You reminded me why I love music so much in the first place. Thank you for loving me when I didn't know how to love myself."
When she made her way back down to her seat, Y/n pulled Max into a passionate kiss, smiling at him as a stray tear rolled down his face. "I love you." He murmured, his hand moving to stroke his thumb against her stomach.
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POV this is your first time posting 2025. hi guys im back, idk how often i'll be posting though so…alot has happened over the past five months school wise (im in my final year), personal wise and in formula aswell (oscar winning twice - i dont wanna talk about ferrari and the australian grand prix). i want to come on here again and say thank you guys for the amount of support i have recieved, never in my wildest dreams did i think my writting would get this much support. I will try and update as much as possible but school has to come first which is why i ended up putting things on a halt. on a side note i've been working on my own book (nothing f1 related) which is why i've been putting less time into tumblr. however I will try to be updating more here. I've started watching 911 and i'm genuinely obsessed with it and have started brewing up some fanfics but i don't know if ill post them on here or if ill make a seperate blog and keep this one f1 focused. anyway i love you guys so so much and will post a couple of fics today to feed you lot <3.
I will work on my new up coming series here and a lando x journalist spin off and eventually i will add some bonus chapters because i don't think i can ever let this story go xxx. (i didn't read over this so sorry if it does not make any sense)
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#f1 fluff#f1 series#f1 imagine#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1#f1 x reader#formula 1#max verstappen#f1 masterlist#max verstappen fic#max verstappen angst#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen fluff#reputation series#repuation
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never separate them :-(
#i cant get them out of my head for a MONTH#im obsessed over them for a MONTH#they r my pookies#arcane#jayvik#jayce x viktor#jayce talis#viktor arcane#arcane jayce#viktor#character design#character art#arcane season 2
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me when i fuck it we ball
#ortismypassion#undertale#sans#papyrus#flowey#frisk#i did not lovk in i actually got locked the fuck out abd climbed through the window instead#anwyasys i think about them alot. too much#thinking about them all remembering resets and all burdened by tue fact that theyve all killed each other and they've all watched each othe#die over and over.#but its ok they're silly with it now and are not totally a little co dependent and trauma bonded abd cant be away from each other for a few#minutes at a time#anwyags i have this scene in my head of toriel opening the bedroom door and looking at them all fondly . a soft smile on her face#before closing the door and sighing. letting a worried frown mar her face#because shesso worried about them.#worried about how they seem so close yet they have not known each other for even a month before getting to their surface home#and how theyre never apart#or how all of them get nightmares and seem to seek each other out for comfort. so mucn so that theyve all moved into one room together#anwyays do you get me. do tou get it (wjo tf is reading this anymore)#they've been through so much and seen so many things that theyre not the same peoplen they were. never will be.
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lord its so dark in here the sahara desert of tsaritsa content you are like a shining oasis. your characterisation of her compels me & mihoyo would be hard pressed to top it imo.!! caaaaan i humbly request yr thoughts on her first meeting w a reader of any kind, or maybe even multiple kinds (sagau, sagau god au, isekai, etc) if you so desire...
it really is like a desert here. being the fan of a character we aren't getting until the last damn nation is driving me up a wall but i will persevere bc if nothing else i support morally bankrupt women in media. we r in a severe drought over here but i do my best. unfortunately nothing i say is ever coherent so pull out your translation notes its abt 2 be messy
also this got out of hand but thats bc first meetings w the tsaritsa are tricky to write + a LOT of her characterization lies in deeper exploration then just surface level yknow...NOT A DIG AT YOU this is just my excuse for rambling. gently pats the tsaritsa she can hold so much complexity i do not have the word count to delve into it completely :]
gonna talk cult au for a bit here though because that's 99% of my content. and honestly? she thrives in sub au's of the cult au like villain au + imposter au. it's basically made for her. i mean, early days, the imposter au had been going around for a little while but one of the first few ideas was the Fatui taking reader in so like. it kinda technically actually was. pretty sure cult au Tsaritsa popped up because of the imposter au. a lot of it's writers kinda left though which. man am i getting old or.
anyway.
there isn't much of a chance her first impression is all that positive. at best it's usually neutral, imo, but rarely if ever positive. specifically because i view the Tsaritsa as someone who isn't as fanatical as most of the acolytes typically are towards the creator. she's not exactly going to worship the ground you walk on unlike a certain geo lizard. which is partially why i think she thrives in the sub au's i mentioned.
imposter au, for example. she meets you at your lowest. there's no gaudy extravagance or pampering from the acolytes waiting for you because your own acolytes have turned on you. for all intents and purposes you aren't a "god" at all. which is why i don't think she meshes well with normal cult au reader. the Fatui are made up of outcasts, basically, and imposter au slots right in just perfectly. you're weak, at your lowest, when you meet the Fatui in the imposter au. and the Fatui can help you, too.
a mutual exchange, really. the Tsaritsa sees a tool she can use to one up the rest of the nations and especially Archons, and she has no qualms about you using her and the Fatui in turn. you both want something out of it, after all. whether you just want to be safe from the rest of the acolytes, or you want revenge, or whatever else..she'll give you the power to fulfill it, and she gains the strongest piece on the chessboard when all is said and done.
the best way i can describe the first meeting is "practical", i suppose. she sees an opportunity in you. the ultimate gamble. because if she "saves" you, and you dont trust anyone else because they tried to kill you, well..she holds all the cards, doesn't she?
but the Tsaritsa, imo, is just as capable of being just as fanatical towards you as anyone else. she just won't worship you as the creator. but as yourself? clawing your way back to your divine power and taking back what belongs to you? the Tsaritsa is, to me, a character who's character flourishes in long-term fics more because she changes a LOT between "just met reader" and after having been with reader for some time. she's practically apathetic at the beginning but a lot of her character, in my characterization, shines through LONG after the first meeting.
#asks#Anonymous#sagau#tsaritsa#like. am i explaining this coherently?? first meetings r GOOD and i could go on a tangent of like. first meetings w zl and make it work#but first meetings w the tsaritsa is like. you just cooked a 5 course meal. took one bite. called it a day.#so much of my characterization lies in the “after” of the first meeting#because her first meetings are generally the same. she's apathetic at best!! she does not gaf abt the creator in the SLIGHTEST#but show that you are more then the creator? that you do not cling to the title like a shield? that you do not rely on it?#youve got the worst person youve ever known ready to kill a man for you.#tsaritsa is very like. EXTREMELY hard to earn the trust of but when you do she will kill someone for you no hesitation no question#which is why she works SO WELL in villain au and imposter au!!!!!!!!!#esp if theres a fake “creator” calling you the imposter. she hates their ass and was .5 seconds from dethroning them anyway#you just made it 10x easier#also cant do just first meetings bc i am incapable of not shoving themes of love into every fic w her SORRY#tsaritsa going on a full multiple month long mental breakdown bc she is not in love with you but she would destroy everything for u..#(shes in denial)#tsaritsa and complex themes of love and what it means for the god of love to be incapable of feeling it + what it means when reader shows u#LIKE UGHHHHHH okay. i guess ill write another tsaritsa fic and put it in my vault#aka my drafts#i hold so many fics hostage there its crazy#this answered like 0 of ur questions sorry i see tsaritsa and black out and this happens#i just think first meetings dont let her character really come thru but my response got out of hand so uhhhhh everyone look away. please#putting tape over my mouth now so i shut up before this gets worse#basically tsaritsa gravitates more towards outcast reader rather then one who has already become accustomed to the adoration of the acolyte#does that make sense........#i havent slept in forever and im running on nothing but spite and dreams atp dont expect coherency when it comes 2 the tsaritsa from me#head in hands someone please stop me i keep rambling abt the tsaritsa it makes me go NUTS#lays down. explodes
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heehee (pepstavo under the cut)
#arts#mine#saucy#pepstavo#easing everyone in w the cute shit first#can u believe i forgot about this???? CAN U BELIEVE IT ???#this is like one of the first things i drew back in like April i think#i still love it tho#recently i have been drawing them doing some heehee shit instead of the cutesy shit so i need this to stay humble#remember my roots…#anyway if ur still reading this hooray u get bonus stuff like usual w my tags#giving him a huge praise kink. he is doing SUCH a good job he is doing the best job EVER#this would be a bit further in their relationship (pending™️) where the intimacy walls are slowly being worn down#so hes seeking out touch and affection and all that goodness instead of reflexively flinching away#and gus SEES this so hes trying so hard to encourage him like BLEASE….i did not dick around for months for this to NOT pay off#he is a patient man but theres only so much patience one Can have#and that patience IS rewarded#its funny bc i write gus as like. a top. a general Dom bc he is both patient and assertive#and hes met someone he GENUINELY w his WHOLE chest wants to bottom for and he cant do it bc this bigass dude is a lil princess™️#and so for now he is being the big boy but hes like counting down in his head when theyre able to get to a space comfy enough for him#where he gets to get his back blown out (its soon)#i hope that doesnt make it seem like hes only being nice to get dicked down bc he is actually always this nice#and full of love bursting at the seams#which results in endless praise and pdas and being a bit more playful than usual (bc he is a silly lil joyous gnome; its built in his dna)#so peppino will simply have this forever :)#okay mwah#i will slowly upload my stuffs since twitter is exploding and anyone who isnt niceys about this will be obliterated#like for reals
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The wine won 😎
#also tell me why someone that fumbled me v hard tried to reach out again 🥴#my dude i gave you two chances that i really shouldn't have and youre just trying again?#bish#feck off!#im just so hot cool and funny people cant get enough 😔#cursing people so i live in their head 5ever rent freeee#like i was so down to go fuck this person and they just disappeared off the face of the earth for like a month#then came back and said life was crazy so i gave them the benifit of the doubt since you know life is crazy#but still would have been nice if they just messged to say they were busy and would chat when they could#nope nothing#and then after they did that and i communicated it wasnt fair they went and did the same thing again a couple months later#like talking daily to tumbleweeds#so no human i shant be repoding to you yet.again for you to inevitably do it again#pups are for life not just for Christmas 😠#offt im waffling too much lol#pup lore#hope people arent grump when i go off like this#i fear my flatmate gets sick of me ranting about my failed human interactions so this is my other outlet 😅
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Thinking about 3 of my blorbos
⬆️Want to do this to them btw
#been rotating around my head for the past couple MONTHS (years *COUGH COUGH*)#i cant get them out#they won't leave me alone#im in absolute agony#<- girl whos having the time of her life#hmiae rambles#skyward sword link#botw link#totk link#the legend of zelda#ninjago lloyd#lloyd garmadon#ninjago#lego ninjago#cloud strife#ff7#ff7 remake#ff7 rebirth#ffvii
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aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
#art summary#i have to clear out my phone. im hoping that if i remove all the nier rein screenshots ill have space#im almost certain its all the rein screenshots cause. they’re bigger than most pics and i had a lot#otherwise im not cooked but god i hope its that easy#i dont make resolutions but i hope i draw more next year#the problem with art summaries is youll have months where you draw a lot#months where yiu draw 10 good things and then every other month is empty#but you drew. so you cant look at art summaries with emoty months and get sad#but like i didn’t draw as much this year lmao too much going on in my head#i was gonna say i rarely drew but i draw so much more than the average person#what i really mean is i didn’t finish anything#i was in my dA gallery the other day and I really used to draw a fully colored piece everyday on high school#absolutely mad. and we (me and my friends) all used to do it#i just had a thought: a majority of my friends draw <- thoughts for later#i had to answer the door so I forgot what i was talking about#i think that. what i was getting at was that behavior really screws up what’s a healthy relationship with art?#like when you’re a kid you have time and when you’re inexperienced and don’t know you’re more forgiving on your mistakes#whereas now if i draw one thing a week thats a job well done to me. im so busy i can’t take it out on myself and i dont#and of course the sms algorithm but I don’t play with the algorithm#but yeah everyone i grew up drawing with friends or ppl i follow stopped drawing or just posting a lot and I’ve been thinking about it a lot#an artist i really like used to post a whole bunch of art dumps everyday. just doodles on different series and i loved seeing them#but they stopoed posting. working on being that kind of artist for me. we got xx art at home situation#if any of that makes sense
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thank yoy for drawing erik so big . He is a big man. HUGE EVEN. thank you.
Big man……….. i love me big man…..
#snap chats#i LOVE drawing big mfers and i hate that i have a core memory of when this all started for me#i had no chance it all started when i was a wee lad i knew id be doomed to lovin drawin big men djznKNs#its all the shapes… round… and the occasional squish yk…#also just. Big. i like big. bigger the better etc etc#i have a problem i am SICK#soeaking of problems Dilema what do i eat#my fam did just make adobo… my moms friends adobo so thats how you know its ESPECIALLY delicious#ong wait i was so caught up in the euphoria of meat i forgot the My Month Cant Get Worse news skOWNSSJ#SO I HAD A DOCS APPOINTMENT FOR MY MEDICINE AND LITERALLY LIKE. BEFORE I HEAD TO THE STATION#MY DADS LIKE ‘son our insurance isnt eligible anymore’ WHAT DO YOU /MEAN/#on a lighter note we were talkin bout when we’d go to the doc#and my dad was like ‘no gothic looks today’ abd i was like ‘lol fair’ and i made a joke about Being Normal Now#TELL ME WHY THIS MAN IMMEDIATRLY CALLS AFTER AND IS LIKE ‘my son im sorry you know i love your fashion :( youre always normal to me-#i didnt mean to offend’ LIKE DAD I WAS JOKING /ENOUGH/. ACTUALLY too fuckin silly and it says a lot#my dad always says Dont Say Sorry Unless You Have Something To Apologize For so the fact he /called/ a sec later#instead of leaving a quick apology or something. i do not apologize for dedicating half these tags to my dad#he is far too funny djOWDJSJEK BUT ANYWAY im gonna go eat ig idk#i have an online assignment due tonight but its a grouo assignment but no ones reached out despite me attempting to get ahold of them all 🫠#fingers crossed things turnaround idk… i hate online classes.. ok byebfiODJSJ
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(vent in the tags) me thinking i've finally escaped financial problems: :DDDDD
life:
#idk why the image pasted like that but anyways haha im once again in a fucking pit#last month i was able to accumulate enough savings from collectively work and also other stuff#so i have a bit of extra in case of emergencies and additional expenses like taxes and stuff#but then guess who decided to not tell me he can't send me money by the end of the month - the time when i have to pay rent?#:DDD my beloved father#so i end up using the savings to pay for it#and i dont blame him or im not mad at him at all#especially because sending me money is already enough of a privilege that not a lot of people have#but at the very least if you don't think you can send me money can't you just tell me?#that way i can work for it???#because now im literally sitting with no money with food running out quickly in the fridge#i can't pick up a shift because whether its out of town or in my city it doesn't matter#i have no way to transport myself there other than on foot or on my bike#and i cant even cycle there without eating otherwise i'd basically sentence myself to death#so im trying to get by without eating for a couple of days right now but its just#sigh#i keep telling my father that i don't blame him and im not mad at him if he can't send me money when i need him to#but please tell me because i literally cannot take a shift this month because i need to study for the exams#and if i fail these exams i literally have one more chance to do them or else i have to repeat a year#which is going to cost us more in the long run#and just#yeah#maybe the hunger is getting to my head#im not going to open emergency comms this time because technically speaking i do have a job i can do#its just i need to just wait for the money that was supposed to be in my bank account to be sent#so i can eat and also i can have money for transportation#haku vents#venting#yeah no im just not in a good spot right now#apologies to mutuals and friends if i can't be on often
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It's so weird being off on a Monday
#i work like 90% of mondays so when i get the odd one off it feels so strange#i spend a period of time trying to figure out which one shot i wanted to post today only to remember it wasnt tuesday#but the good news is i think ive figured out the order of one shots for the next few weeks#maybe#its subject to change#at the v least ive figured out what i need to finish/save so i can post them during may#im moving across the country this summer so theres gonna be a hiatus but i got stuff i dont wanna wait to post#and since im heading back to my parents for may idk if ill be able to set my cpu up#so i got a small fic im gonna save before i have to pack it up and my birthday fic for this year which i gotta finish within a month#shouldnt be too hard since ive been working on it all day and got the first two chunks and most of the third done#as well as the barebones plan for the rest of it#special info for reading all these damn tags is that birthday fic this year is gonna be the post reunion sequal to cant erase me#and its looking to be just as beefy lmao#i could theoretically split it up but also i think a second huge as fuck oneshot makes the most sense
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dating an art student was so crazy I'm just thinking abt that one birthday I had where my ex got me stickers from the etsy of the person they were cheating on me with....
#they made them address the thank you note to me and everything ajskfjfkfb. i didnt know they were cheating at the time but wow...#every time i break out my sticker collection and see them im reminded of it. but i cant throw out the stickers theyre deltarune ones 😭#like they were a rly cool artist.... just unfortunate that happened 💀#the drama was insane. my ex only wanted to sleep with them but they (other person) wanted them to break up with me so they could date#but my ex dumped them rly harshly for suggesting that i guess 'romantic' cheating was a step too far even for them lmaooo#i heard abt their breakup secondhand and god could they be cruel sometimes. they made fun of the sex theyd had w them#to all their mutual friends n everything i actually felt so bad for the other person when i found out. at least our breakup wasnt that bad#i only finally got that cruel side of them directed towards me like a year after when they wanted us to stop being friends#but yeah. its also funny in a way bc my ex only suggested i had adhd bc the other person did too + struggled a lot with rsd#which i guess they found out when they broke up with them. and then looked at that and thought huh my gf is kind of similar...#and this was like. 2 years before i even considered i had adhd myself and sought diagnosis ahdkfidjcjdjfjfjfkdbfnf#this made me go look the other persons art page up on instagram + then i recognised some of their friends/flatmates art pages and i found#their (my exs that is) grad year film which is still being shown at animation festivals... good for them good for them#i dont think they have an art page themselves tho cuz they were always v shy and weird abt sharing art on social media#like everyone else except them is tagged on things... shame i wouldve liked to see what they were making now. even if we're not friends#also one of their old roommates made some REALLY similar squid game fanart to mine like a month after i posted it huh..#not mad abt it or anything i think its cool i just didnt realise they showed my art to their friends. thats cute#ah this was years ago anyway. getting my head out of the rabbit hole#im gonna go play some elden ring and then maybe do smth fun in my sketchbook we shall seeee#.diaries
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awawawawawawa
#bunny rambles#i was “cleared” to go back to work yesterday but she told me i could use the rest of the time also if i wanted/needed#and im using it. but the little corporateanxietybot who lives in my head and tries to make me be a Good Worker[tm] is SCREAMING HER HEAD OFF#cause she thinks my boss/Dad is gonna scream at and hit her for being Lazy#this is a trauma post also um. didnt expect to name her rn but she's screaming and i cant scream back cause she sounds like alarms and those#scare crustywhitedog so i have to calm that one so i don't meltdown#my wife submitted the RTW date for me so like. its okay im actually taking the time and ik this is necessary also bc. it is clearly unwell#that its freaking out because it's gotten a more than a 2 day break for the first time in a year#ik corporateanxietybot has protected me in some ways but. i gotta kill her so bad. maybe H can help me reformat her somehow .....#i also hate her is the thing. she cant hear me rn bc she's just looping in circles alarming but anyway. i hate her. like Me. she's so#capitalismcorebootlicker and i hate that about her and i hate that she exists and i hate that she exists bc my dad raised me to be an#Employee instead of a person 🙃🙃🙃🙃#im not elaborating or explaining any of this. this is a diary entry now#i wish i could click her to kill her like the drones in hardcoded lmao it'd be so much easier. ik she like. lives in the work mode mask as#well which is also HARD bc if im not actively thinking Of work or At work she's nonexistent#but shes so LOUD 🙃🙃 like shut up. we're not gonna explode n die from taking an extra week off you're being dramatic our boss isnt Dad#like he LITERALLY isn't Dad. not even close. he's like the most docile man in the world come on ik they're around the same age and both hve#held authority over u but boss checking in wasnt a trap ur not ab to get caught doing wrong ur fiiiiIIIIIIINE#(also corporateanxietybot is not an adult. she's 15 and terrified but she integrated to my work mask which is the problem cause she makes me#a “phenomenal employee” and also makes me work myself sick when she is given the reigns. little devil on my shoulder except the capitalist#system we live under treats her as a positive thing so she gets positive reinforcement at work which only makes her more anxious 😭 i gotta#talk to H about this next Friday huh. also wow. parts work has made it a lot easier for me to acknowledge these behaviors so i can confront#them easier. weird. strange even. so many parts have gotten names this past month n im realizing also why its been so hard to process stuff#but it also has made me kinder to myself. anyway she turned off (her batteries are low since she's been home for a month too) so im gonna#clean myself up and get some food in me and then get some cleaning done
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guy trapped in a hell of his own creation: haha ive never done anything wrong in my entire life. and im always right:] anyway. why did my little brother move out:(
its so funny to me that at first glance tashi seems like hed be the most 'normal' out of all the clones but at least all the others are slowly healing n shit while hes just getting more and more insane each day and one day hell snap and explode and maim someone
#my art#my funky guys#HES SO FUCKING STUPID.#tashi im sorry ily but youre literally the dumbes fucking motherfucker ive ever seen. and a cringe loser. never change king<3#like. this guy realised he was a clone when he was a month old and decided to base his new personality entirely#on the idealised version of the original he made up in his head.#like he did this to himself!!! he chose to revolve his entire personality around being a 'perfect flawless mom friend'!!!!!!!#in his head hes like the most selfless & altruistic person to ever walk the earth but in reality hes a sad selfish mess who just wants to#be loved.#he started out as a pretty nice and level headed guy who wanted to help ppl but then it just spiraled when he made that his entire#personality bc of his inability to move on from a lie he really wanted to be true.#he percieves shiro as this perfect flawless leader figure and he wants DESPERATELY to imitate that. deep down its not enough for him to#simply coparent and share responsibility w the others. no no no he has to be The Leader and do everything himself!#this mindset results in him later on starting to dismiss and undervalue his familys work and commitment to keeping them all alive-#esp soup. like sHE WAS THERE W HIM FROM THE VERY BEGINNING THEY ARE EQUALS THEY ARE BOTH EQUALLY IMPORTRANT#AND HES SO FAR UP HIS ASS HE FORGOT. somewhere along the line he forgot. he missed the point. he spiraled too deep.#and he knows. he knows but hes so terrified of change and growth and admitting he CANT do this alone.#he wants to be a cool epic capable solo leader AND he craves family and connection soooo badly he cant live w/o his loved ones.#so yeah. hes an angry little pathetic freak<3 i love him#despite all that hes not a bad person. just a flawed guy thrown into a situation so stressful and traumatising that he clinged to the only#coping mechanism he had at the time and just sorta. ran with it.#dw he gets better tho! it takes a lot and his and sticks relationship is strained for a LONG time but he slowly gets better. good for him
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The holy spirits and I are no longer on speaking terms.
#you think you know somebody. you really fucking do#you spend 6 long months with them... only to#only to fucking find out#i cant believe it#I CANNOT BELIEVE IT#HE ONLY DID A DAMN NIGHT. A NIGHT !!!!!!!!!!!#I SPENT 7 LONG MONTHS ON MY CHRITSMAS CAROL AND THAT SLIMEY STINKY WRINKLEY NO GOOD RICH MOTHERFUCKER WITH A CORPSE OF A BOB ON HIS HEAD#GETS ONE. ONE FUCKING NIGHT??????#fuck it.#i dont even care. I literally dont even care.#fuck it whatever
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