#i cant even write what i feel cuz i dont know
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mushed-kid · 10 months ago
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i don’t think i can ever be really close to anyone
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motherforthefamicom · 4 months ago
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redownloaded an old art program
#specifically its tayasui memopad…#sketches was like borderline unusable last i redownloaded it#which was like.. oct last year#maybe its gotten better but i dont feel like bothering with it anymore haha#memopad i never used much aside from little scribble doodles (id make a scribble and try to turn it into something)#but its changed a lot since i last used it.. which was like four years ago so i cant be too surprised i guess XD#its still pretty jank but in a more manageable way . i missed rhe sketches brushes theyre very lovely#sorry for all the rambling haha#ive been feeling really shitty lately and have barely been able to draw it feels like#a lot of what i have made ive had to really.. force myself to get out. and i havent been as satisfied with it as id like to br#this is kind of janky still but i like it and i had fun making it#everytime i draw these two its exactly the same cuz i have to remind myself what their designs even were everytime >_<‘’#hopefully i do some more stuff today. its already getting late but im feeling a little better#getting back into the swing of things or whatever#i thought someone on af was ghosting me or whatever but turns out they were just . busy. ( <- figures i need to stop assuming haha) and#they also made this amazing revenge im absolutely in love with its so cute#really made my day =)#scribbles#furry tag#good god i write way too much in these#sorry#anyways#queueing this to post again (its the 14th as im writing this) i feel like that worked alright for me last time#im kinda making this post impulsively i am. constantly going back nd forth on whether i even like posting my art nowadays#oh well#yeah queue i wanna know#mother series#<- i forgot to tag that . for blog organization mostly these r just#nothing burger npcs barely anyone cares abt (nintens sisters lol)
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toestalucia · 2 years ago
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been thinking about arthur for 2 hrs cuz i think the whole thing of "little wizard prince is abandoned in the north by his mother" would hit gran kinda. srsly hard
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sollux-captor · 2 years ago
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im feeling so many ways abt late a5a2 homestuck (i just finished it actually) but the sufferer hit way different.
homestuck late a5a2 spoilers incoming!!!
adding this after writing way too much shit that im not fucking deleting: vent cw too
ok so my main thing that made me feel something (a rarity, like almost unheard of /gen /srs) was the signless' story. something about it just envoked feelings within me, i dont even know how to describe them
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something about this fucking frame just made me feel... idk what. dread? pity? genuinely idk. obviously its not the whole "ouuuu tied up so hawttt" bullshit, idk i think the story combined with the music and imagery just made it to the farthest pits of my soul, and this point was the breaking/overwhelming point.
i almost want to sit thru all of it again just to try and figure it out. i want to feel that again to understand it. obviously if i read it again i wont feel anything cuz thoughts, emotions, and feelings are a rare experience for me.
i feel like the story felt like a metaphor for my life, not to get all emo and dark and edgy or whatever about it, im being completely level-headed and genuine with this.
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fuck thats what it feels like's happening inside of me. i feel my compassion and love for others depleting, as its been for years, with the cards ive been dealt (not getting into that right now). ive been conscious of an eternal rage slowly growing inside of me, and these past few years i feel like the ratio of compassion vs. rage within me is leaning in a way that im just barely able to see how bad and scary it is. ive been subjected to a life of suffering in almost every place i could imagine, yet i always tried to stay a loving, caring person for the few individuals who bring about some light in this darkness.
yet i can see it happening before my very eyes. i see i am no longer who i once was, im worse, im violent and enraged all the time and its getting worse and harder contain with every passing day. its scary being able to watch yourself rot away into a bottomless pot of boiling rage.
torture and execution has always been the metephor ive used when describing how i live and feel inside. i think to see something so deep within me and something so relatable in front of me, written and drawn out as a story, i think that broke me.
#homestuck spoilers#cw vent#the signless#homestuck#this comic is the only thing thats made me feel something like this#it kinda makes me feel.. less lonely and like im not the only one whos lived like this.#kinda fucking wild how its the mutant bloods who i relate to the most#its almost like i am them in a way. perhaps my creation triggered a reaction throughout the universe to have them created#like i was their inspiration or theyre based off me#i know its not true but it makes me feel better#idk how i feel#i learned feelings the way an AI learns how people talk#or how they act etc. so like all these complex things are impossible for me to compute#ive written too much my hand really hurts cuz the whole possible fractured wrist thing or whatever. bye#no fucking way im leaving this in the queue or drafts#this is being posted publicly so everyone can see my fucking stupid fucking meltdowns#i really need to stop writing so much self deprecating and self exposing and self discovery bullshit#is that even what this is??? i dont fucking know anymore i cant stop typing fuck#nobody even reads any of my rants or tags or vents or whatever anyways. not like im looking for help or pity#but fuck i dont even know what reason i write or post shit like this#nothing good will ever come out of it#god i hate myself more than anyone else#i guess its good im my biggest adversary. i keep close tabs on each and every move ive made in the past#and everything i may or may not do in my future#i just realized this sounds like im playing a character wtf is wrong with me am i really this fucking moronic?#this is genuinely such a pathetic depressing annoying piece of shit to read back but i still feel like i have to post it#fuck the tags are longer than the post this is so stupid#fuck
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mochamadeleines · 20 days ago
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Sweethearts and Sweet Dreams <3
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“Nothin’?”
“Mhm.”
“Whats behind your back then?”
You sway in place, trying to suppress a knowing smile. “I dont have anything behind my back.” (6.4k words)
tags!! - 18+ modern au! Husband! Joel Miller, Wife! Reader, you guys are happy and in love!, mutual obsession if u squint, lots of exposition im so freaking sorry, pervert Joel if u squint, praise kink joel if you squint, dumbification if you squint, written for those with daddy issues lowkeeyyyyy, written with game joel in mind but could be hbo joel no problem!, lowk i combined the two in my mind, mentions of shy old man joel, housewife! reader (by choice), unspecified age gap but reader is like. thirty? and joels Like...55??, talk about joel taking medication for his anxiety, p in v sex, dirty talk, public sex, outdoor sex, joel has a kink for dresses because i said so? service top joel if you squint, pet names, a pinch of jealousy and possessiveness for fun, playful banter, mentions of maria and tommy and their baby with a made up name Lol, mentions of ellie and sarah (rip), mentions of readers past abusive relationships, talk about joel struggling with substance abuse/addiction and being hospitalized.....Im sure u can theorize why </3, lots of lore ill get into in another fic MAYBE *smirks*, flip flop in perspective, sometimes showing what joel is thinking or what reader is thinking blah blah
authors notes!! - hi there!!! im mocha and this is my first joel fic ever + my first fic posted to tumblr!! im really nervous cuz i havent written anything in months and ive never written joel before so please let me know if you like it!! id love to write more of this au for u guys if theres a demand for it...Thank u for reading!! also barely proof read im ngl. ive been staring at this fic all day im sick of itttt. p.s i dont usually write smut i also kinda do idfk Is this bad or am i tweaking
You step out of the house, morning sun soaking into the roots of your hair and the driveway beneath your feet. Theres a package youve been waiting for. 
You cant contain your grin as you wiggle it out of the hot prison that is your mailbox.
“What the hell are you doin’ out there barefoot?” Joel chastises you from the front door, leaning his elbow on the frame. Joel, your lovely husband of two years. Been together for five. And because of how hard he works, you have the privilege of being a stay at home wife. Some people think that sort of life is stifling, but youve never felt so free. No more jobs you hate, no more financial struggles. Just you, Joel, and your cat, Cement. He likes to pretend it isnt a totally hilarious name for a pet.
You were his first relationship in almost a decade, so it was a lot of work helping him unpack his anxieties about dating, and a lot of work for you to feel safe and unafraid. Honestly? Youve been mistreated by enough men to land you in the psychward.
But Joel never yells at you, he never breaks things when hes angry or threatens to hurt you. He might raise his voice every now and again, but its never because of something you did. Sometimes the stress of life is just too much. 
He works hard, he loves his daughter- daughters- and he would do anything to keep you happy. Whatever you say goes, he says. Even now, you hardly argue. Of course you have disagreements, or off days thatd lead to one of you being especially moody, but the both of you do your best to communicate.
Behind that rough exterior, is someone who just wants to be needed. 
You first met Joel at a youth center you volunteered at, he taught guitar, you taught arts and crafts. Joel says it was your smile and sense of humor that charmed him. It was his singing and southern accent for you.
Your favorite thing about Joel is how soft he gets around you. He says its because you make it easy to be soft. 
Joel was a shy lover at first. He would get nervous just kissing you, or holding your hand. While most people become intimate very early on in their relationship, you and Joel didnt do anything sexual for the first five months of you dated. Sure, you almost did, plenty of times, but he would get so overwhelmed and cut things short. You broke two of your vibrators during this era of your relationship. Embarassing.
You remember your first time very vividly. Joel had worked back to back doubles trying to meet a deadline, and on the final day, after having barely spoken to you for almost a week, you had shown up to his house, unannounced. You were wringing water out of your jacket when he swung the door open. 
“How-” Joel blinks a few times, stepping forward to examine the rainfall. “How long you been out here?”
“Not that long,” You lie and pick up the container you brought off the porch chair. Part of you had a hard time mustering up the courage to even knock on the door. Droplets of water cascade down your chin. “Hi, sorry. I know youre tired.”
He shakes his head, voice soft and warm. “S’fine. Now c’mon, youre gonna get sick.”
Youre seated at the little dining table next to the kitchen now, trying to let the sound of the rainfall ease your nerves.
Joel was quick to grab you a towel, and does the honors of drying your face and hair with it. “Why didnt you jus’ call me? Woulda gotten out of the shower faster if i knew you were gettin’ soaked out there like this.”
“I dunno, sorry.”
“An’ whatd i tell you about apologizin’ all the time?”
“Sor- Uh. Right. Okay.” You tighten your jaw. No more.
Joel moves behind you, now squeezing water out the ends of your hair. “Whas’ that?”
“Oh!-” You peel back the lid, showing it to him. “Old fashion cake donuts are your favorite right? I remember you saying you liked eating them with your coffee in the mornings so…I made these. Youve been working a lot lately and I wanted to do something nice for you.”
Joel gingerly grasps the container from your hands, looking into it. Theyre a warm golden brown, outside evenly fried, and the sweet scent of them hits his nose right away.
“I was just gonna leave them on the doorstep and call you to tell you they were there, but I wanted to see you.”
His adam's apple bobs as he swallows the dryness in his throat. Youre too good for him. 
“Thank you very much.” He presses a kiss to your damp hair. “Now, lets get you into some dry clothes.”
Joel gives you a t-shirt and a pair of his boxers to keep you modest while your clothes wash and dry. 
You wait patiently on his bed for the hot chocolate he promised you before you showered. Theres nothing to watch on the tv, so you just turn it off and reach for the lamp on his nightstand instead. 
He comes in quietly, and sets the mug down beside the lamp. You finally come into focus, clear as day even under the low lighting.
“You uh.. You look nice.”
You blink. “I look nice?”
“In my shirt.”
That gets a smile out of you. 
Joel tips his head towards the mug. “S’hot so, give it a few minutes. Dont want you burnin’ your mouth.”
You nod. “Okay.”
Hes sat beside you now and the two of you sit in silence for a while. Its not awkward, just the kind of silence where both of you want to say something but just.. Cant.
Joel unravels first. “Missed you, y’know. Just been tired.”
“I know.” Your voice wobbles, and Joels jaw tightens like hearing you sound so sad stings him. “I missed you, too.” 
He slides his hand over yours, giving it a squeeze. Its okay. 
“Hey Joel...Can I stay the night?” 
“Sure. Id really like that.”
While you drink your hot chocolate, you and Joel catch up. You both talk about work, and about your new found interest in baking. Joel teases you about your lack of cooking skills, you do the same. Youre both useless. 
When its time to climb into bed, neither of you can actually fall asleep. Joel rolls onto his side, away from you and the window. You follow, curling up like a little cat against his back. The sensation is nice for the both of you.
You speak up after a little while.
“Joel?”
“Mm.”
“Thank you for letting me stay.”
He scoffs, voice thick with exhaustion. “Like I'd force you to leave after you brought me such a nice present.”
You let out a little giggle, “So if i didnt, youd kick me out?”
“Id think ‘bout it.”
You gasp, gently shoving at his back. “Thats mean…!”
“S’really not.”
“Oh yeah? And what if I poisoned them?.”
“Then itd jus' be a regular day of your cookin’ then.” Joel reminds you, lighthearted. Too many times where you left the shells in your eggs or burnt toast or left the bacon on the pan for too long.
“You cant get mad at me for my dark past when you made a perfectly good sirloin taste like horse leather.”
“Ugh. Dont remind me. That was like putting a one-hundred dollar bill into a paper shredder. How do either of us stay alive again?”
“Uh. Digiorno?”
“Digiorno.”
After a few moments, Joels rolling over again, and hes guiding your head to settle against his chest. Your arms wrap around him, and his arms around you. 
“Joel,” You whisper. He hums. “Im cold.”
“S’cause youre not wearin’ any pants.”
“And whos fault is that?”
“Still yours.”
“I was left out in the rain like a sad, sopping wet cat. One that was left in a box all alone with no family…” You pretend to sniffle. “Dont you feel bad for me?”
Joel sighs, not saying anything more except making sure the part of the comforter behind your back is tucked into your side so the cold air doesnt get in. When hes done, you do a little shimmy up his body, and throw your leg over his hip. Oh no.
Hes alert now. Very alert. Be normal. Joel hesitates, licking the dryness off his lips. “Uh. Feel better?”
“Mhm.” You push your face into his throat, cat-like, before settling down again. Hes like a radiator.
Actually scratch that, he cant be normal. 
“Darlin’.” He rasps, patting your back to get your attention.
“Mm?”
“Your leg. Move it.”
A few beats pass. “Why?”
“Because…” Wow,  he didnt think hed get this far. You shift forward and Joel lets out a quiet exhale through his nose, one that couldve been masked by the rain if you werent so close.
“Are you-”
“No! No. Its- Its not what you think-” He cant see your face in the darkness but he knows you feel the semi-hard struggling through the confines of his pants. Lame.
“Joel,” You say, soft. Your hands slide up his arm to cradle his jaw. Lightning flashes into the room, giving you a glimpse of Joels tight expression. He whispers your name back, just as soft.
“This is normal.” 
Its normal, it is! Except for the fact that you guys havent had sex yet. The stress of being intimate is too much, kills his boner in a blink. The longer he waits the worse the anxiety gets.
“I-I know.”
You place a hand on his chest, feeling it pound away like crazy through all the soft muscle.  
“Youve been taking your medication, right?”
Has he?
The silence of him thinking is proof enough. “Joel-”
He sighs, rubbing his eyes through the darkness .“I know, I know. Shoot, Im sorry. I just forget sometimes.”
“Its okay.” The pad of your thumb strokes the tops of his cheek, and you press a tender kiss to his mouth to soothe him.  “...Want me to remind you?”
The softness of your lips has him a bit dazed. “Huh?”
“I said, do you want me to remind you? I can- You know, call you before you leave work. Make sure you take them.”
“You know I wake up at five-o-clock in the mornin’ , right?”
“I know.” 
In a whisper, “Okay.”
Joels rough palms trail down your back and stop at the curve of your butt, finger tips delicately tracing the skin above your shorts. You shiver.
Barely above a whisper. “We dont have to go all the way.”
He says your name again, laced with worry. He doesnt want you to feel pressured. 
You pull your leg off his hip and push yourself up, settling your hands on either side of Joels head.
“Can I tell you something?”
“Yes-”
“-And you cant get all in your head about it. You stay here, with me. You stay present.”
“Okay, okay.” He nods, a bit defeated. “I will stay present.”
“When you...When you say you dont wanna have sex, what is it that youre thinking exactly? I know you said you just get really nervous but I feel like youre not being totally honest.”
Joel stays quiet, idly rubbing your sides. Maybe you are a cat. Just getting to feel any part of you is soothing. “I jus’ want you to feel good. ‘Fraid ill do somethin’ you dont like.”
“You cant assume how I feel, Joel. Being intimate.. It takes time to learn what the other person likes.”
He sighs. “I know.” Youre always right.
Adding on, “Like I said, we dont have to go all the way,” You lean further back, situating yourself on his hips. He lets out a shaky breath when he feels the pressure of your ass through his sweats.
“But, I want to start somewhere. I want to feel you.” 
“Fuck- Um-” Hes shaking now, letting you grind your hips down onto him. Joel cant seem to control the way his hips instinctively push up to meet yours. Youre both becoming of a mess of little gasps and hot breaths and tiny whimpers already.
You hunch forward, guiding his hand under your your shirt- His shirt- letting him feel up the supple skin of your stomach, then the area where your ribs are, then your-
“And I want you to feel me,”
Surprisingly, you did actually go all the way that night.
Your sex life was a bit of a rocky start, but after Joel got over most of his anxiety, you learned quickly just how goddamn insatiable he was. Five years in and he still regularly makes you sore. 
There are a couple things you learned about him and his sexual interests. He loves to take you in his truck, in your kitchen, in your bathroom, on your couch. Other, riskier places. Anywhere that isnt your bed apparently, not that he isnt fucking you there either.
Joel is handsy, so handsy infact it embarasses you to no end, especially when youre infront of others. Thats usually how it starts, too. First he kisses you, then gropes your hips and your ass, and the next thing you know, youre cumming on his fingers. Then hed bend you over, or get you on your back, or make you ride him. Is it really riding if hes just slamming up into you until your brain turns into mush?
He likes that too. Making you not think.
Youd be lying if you said its only ever him. Sleepy morning handjobs before work, whining to him over the phone and touching yourself to his voice, arching your back into him while you're washing dishes, sucking him off after hours in his office.
And while most men prefer lingerie or little costumes, Joel likes dresses. Dresses that are discreet so he can take you in the backyard when he comes home early and sees you gardening. Or when youre both at a friends house and hes had a little too much to drink and finds himself alone with you. Dresses that make it easy to play his favorite game with you. I touch you, and you make sure we dont get caught by being too loud. Joel really is the worst sometimes.
Now, you only ever wear pants when its cold, or to bed or sometimes when youre lounging, like today. Youre in some shorts and a tank top. Otherwise, its dresses all year round, usually retro styles or ones meant for spring. Joels not picky though, he loves any dress on you.
Even if you wear an extremely modest, white lacey sleep dress, looking like some kind of vintage ghost, the man would still keep you up all night. And he has. He said you looked like a princess. You guess you kind of did.
The entire thing is like an unspoken arrangement between you both. He doesnt tell you to wear them, you just do.
And he works hard to spoil you, so why not buy as many cute dresses as possible? 
You got a cute dress today too, on the same day Joel has off. You think its going to be a new favorite of his.
The big polymailer stays hidden behind your back. Be casual. “Uh- Nothing!”
“Nothin’?”
“Mhm.”
“Whats behind your back then?”
You sway in place, trying to suppress a knowing smile. “I dont have anything behind my back.”
“Lemme see then. Show me your hands-”
“Hey, Mrs. Miller!”
Both you and Joel turn your heads to the voice, and only one of you has the energy to fake a a smile. Your neighbor is stopping in his driveway, having come back from a jog it looks.
“Hi, Lee.” 
Joel really, really, really doesnt like Lee. You dont like him either, but youre not one to cause problems. Lee on the other hand, is. Hes a bit younger than you, and a lot younger than Joel. Hes one of those tech dudes with a massive ego, thinks that youll be swayed by his money and his “charm” and youth as if youre some sad housewife in need of saving. Gross. 
And another thing, Lee doesnt even actually live here! Hes here ever so often to visit his dad between, you dont know, tech expos? You forget. Joel believes he started showing up more often to see you. 
Youre walking towards the porch again. Joels looking especially unhappy to see him today, knuckles pulled taut into a fist. His lips stay pressed into a thin line, careful not to let anything slip out. He usually lets you do most of the talking, as much as it pains him. 
Joels really not a fan of the way Lees eyes take a trip up your bare legs. Little shit.
“Out with no shoes again, Mrs. Miller?”
“You know me, Im uh- Im weird.”
“The weird ones do it best.” He smiles, all teeth. It gives you the creeps. His attention is on Joel now. Its like watching a puppy try to one up a wolf. “Right, Joel?”
“Uh huh.” Whatever that means.
“Actually, I've been meaning to ask you something, Mrs. Miller.” Lee crosses into your driveway and you glance briefly at Joel, as if to make sure he isnt going to start growling at the other to stay away. Youre clutching the package to your chest now. 
“Have you ever been to a support group for uh- you know, the spouses of addicts?  I have a friend from work and shes really struggling.” 
Lees tone is sugary sweet, but the fake kind you put in diet soda except that stuff is way better. Joel sighs from the door. You stand there, dumbfounded on the porch steps because what the fuck is he going on about. 
You clear your throat, keeping your voice firm. “No. Ive never needed to.”  
Joels voice cuts in like a knife. “Been clean for almost twenty years now.”
“Yeah but, you know,” He shrugs, squinting a bit under the morning sun. “Relapses happen.”
Joel and Lee are at a stand still, and the moment Joel lets the arm leaning on the frame drop to his side, you know youre in for a lot of trouble. You move quickly towards the door. “We have to get ready for a- uh- a thing? but Im sorry about your friend.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Miller. Im doing my best to support her.” And before he turns away, he just has to be slimy to you. “If you need someone to talk to, Im here for you.”
“No, that really wont be necess-”
Joels slinging a strong arm around you to yank you back inside before shutting the door. 
“Motherfucker,” He hisses to himself, stomping through the walkway and into the kitchen.
“How-” You rub your eyes, letting them adjust to the light inside of the house. You put the package down onto the bar counter that opens up the kitchen and follow Joel to the fridge. “How does he know?? I thought-”
“Been living in this house for decades now,” His expression is tight, brows knitted together while he chugs a bottle of water. “People talk. ‘Specially if I'm being rolled into an ambulance on more than one occasion.” Joel frowns. “Fuck- I shoulda punched him in the fuckin’ face- Do you see how hard he tries so hard to flirt with you infront’a me?”
“I know, love. I was there.” You take the bottle from his hand and set it to the side, then wrap your arms around him. “Try not to let it get to you okay?”
Joel sighs into your hair, giving your body a squeeze. “I know, I know, but jus’ hearin’ him tryin’ta use my baggage to make a pass at you…S’fuckin’ evil.”
“I agree, but I dont want his blood on the driveway.”
“So get it on his driveway instead, got it.”
You giggle and tip your head up to kiss him. The tension eases from Joels shoulders, and he cups your cheeks, letting his worries melt away into your mouth. When the pads of his fingers start to slide under your tank top, youre leaning back. Youll be here for a while if this goes any further.
Joel mindlessly chases your lips, looking a bit pouty now that its over.
“Im gonna start getting ready for the barbecue, okay?”
“This early?”
“I like being punctual.” 
“My brother wont give a damn if were late.” He noses your jaw, pressing a kiss here and there. Your knees are beginning to feel weak. The bastard is trying to distract you.
“But I do. The farmers market opened today, and I promised Maria I'd get her fresh strawberries before we got there, remember?”
“Alright, alright.” He grumbles into your shoulder.
Joel lets you go, watching you round the bar counter to get your package and disappear upstairs.
-
Ever since you came down to a freshly showered Joel, and got into the car with the gift bags you prepared for Maria and Tommy, Hes been staring at you. One wrong move and the drools gonna start pouring out of his mouth.
Your hair is in its relatively natural state, freshly washed and shiny from the oil you put in it. You put on some light makeup, and went a bit heavy handed on the blush to look sunkissed, and topped it off with a flavored lip gloss Joel especially enjoys. 
Now, the dress. Its a pink floral mid-length dress, with a low cut sweetheart neckline and a corset style backing to cinch your waist and push out your chest. The material is thick and pretty, and there are two other layers under the skirt to keep its shape. You have on a pair of little pink pumps with little bows to match. 
The drive to the farmers market is fairly peaceful, the windows are half down and theres music playing at low volume on the radio. You and Joel have different tastes in music, but one genre you can always agree on is alternative rock. 
The weathers beautiful, sun high in the sky, and its not too hot or humid. The day really is perfect. Youre gonna soak up some sun when youre at the barbecue. Hopefully, they made lemonade again too.
Joel has been mostly quiet throughout your shopping. While it would worry some, youve been with him long enough to know that he just has a lot on his mind. What hes thinking about? Maybe youll learn when you make it back home at the end of the day.
You gasp, strolling through the grass to a stand with a mountain of apples. Granny smith, Macintosh, Pink Ladys, Honeycrisp, the works. He grunts, trying to keep the things that are already in your basket steady. You came for strawberries and are going to leave with much more than that.
Joel nudges you softly. “Remember, this is quality stuff, meaning itll go bad faster. Dont get too much.”
“Okay, got it.” You beam, and then begin inspecting the Pink Lady apples first, trying to find the ones with the best color.  He keeps the basket within reach so you can drop your picks in.
"These were Sarahs favorites."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah, it was funny 'cause we started arguin' over these or Red Delicious. I think Red Delicious is better."
"Thats so cute! Hmm. Should we get one for her? A Pink Lady?"
"Uh," He thinks on it for a moment, unsure, but the smile on your face helps him make a decision. "Sure, why not."
You drop two perfect Pink Ladys into the basket, moving onto the next pile.
“Hey, Joel.” You grin, holding out a wrinkled granny smith apple. “This one looks like you”
“Ha ha.” He deadpans, and grabs it from you to put back. In turn, hes reaching for the runt of the pile. A pathetically small one sitting near the bottom. “Now this one looks like you.”
“Does not!”
“Does too.” 
The next stand has golden kiwis, and youre practically dragging Joel forward to try them. You ask for one, and the man at the stand slices it into halves, giving you a plastic spoon to go with. 
You let Joel smell it first. “S’good.”
“Lets see if it tastes good.”
You sink your spoon into it, humming when you see how soft and easy it is to scoop out. In your mouth it goes!
Its tastes sweet, a bit mango-y and fucking delicious. You bounce in place, spoon feeding Joel next. “Oh yeah,” He smiles, smacking his lips a bit to really let the taste settle on his tongue. “Were takin’ some of these.”
You take one, then two, then three and four then five and as you reach for the sixth one, Joels stopping you with a gentle hand. 
“Darlin’.” 
“Right.” 
For the next few stands its just you and Joel trying various kinds of fruit. Starfruit, blueberries, some mangos, and then youre going back to the truck.
“I think my favorites were the mangos and golden kiwis. I hope Maria and Tommy have enough space in their fridge for all of this.”
“They moved into a bigger house, I reckon their fridge s’probably bigger, too.”
“What time is it?” 
You let go of Joels arm so he can switch the basket from one hand to the other. 
“‘Bout…” Hes squinting at his watch. “12:34 in the afternoon.”
“Oh! Guess we got the shopping done sooner than I expected. Hmm. Should we stop somewhere in the mean time?-" You snap your finger when you remember something. "They opened up this cafe that has cats in it! We can drink coffee and play with them for bit! The next fourty-five minutes will go by super fast."
“Youre gonna make Cement jealous.”
You bat your hand dismissively. “Hes not gonna caaare.” 
“Oh yes he will. And remind me again why we named our cat Cement?
“Uh, we were both drunk and had gotten him the day before without a name picked out?”
“A whole year later and we still kept it. Worst pet owners ever.” Joel chuckles, opening the passenger door for you like he always does. 
“Thank you.”
“Mhm.”
The giant basket of fruit goes into the back seat next to the gift bags before Joel slots himself into the drivers seat. 
You fumble with the radio a bit, trying to see what else is on but ultimately landing back on your preferred station. Theyve been playing a lot of Linkin Park recently. Hell yeah. Joel buckles himself in at last, and pulls out of the parking lot. 
“Marias gonna teach me how to make baked chicken,” You hum, gazing outside the window.
“You sure youre not jus’ unteachable?”
“Ha ha,” You lightly shove his shoulder, making him smile. “I thought you loved the meat sauce pasta I learned how to make.”
He settles into his seat more comfortably at the stop light, elbow rested on the window. “Got me with that one. Think I like ground turkey over beef, though.”
“Yeah? Me too. The beef tastes better but the turkey is lighter. Stops me from feeling all sick.”
“Agreed.”
Youre looking out the windshield now. Where did all the buildings go? Youre out of the city. 
“Uh, Joel?”
“Mm?”
“Where are we going?”
“Somewhere to kill time.”
“Yeah but where?”
“Youll see.” 
Your brows pinch together. “I see a whole lot of nothing except for trees."
“Almost there.”
Joel makes a hasty left turn onto some campgrounds. Your stomach starts to twist into excited knots. Is he gonna show you a baby deer or something? Bunnies? He used to be a park ranger for this area, and would tell you stories about all sorts of baby animals hed run into.
The car comes to a stop, and he turns the engine off. Silence.
“So…Were out in the woods to kill time?”
“Mhm.” Joel unbuckles his seat belt and twists into the back to grab the spare jacket he usually keeps there, then gets out of the truck and comes around the back to open the door for you. 
He holds your hand to help you get down from the passenger side, and as soon as both of your shoes hit the ground Joel is on you. 
You dont know where your hands should go, youve kissed Joel a thousand times and yet you still get so flustered when he catches you by surprise. You keep your hands on his shoulders for now, letting him press wet kisses to your neck and shoulder.
“This is new right? The dress?” He gives your ass an appreciative squeeze through the fabric. “Thought you looked so pretty when you came down stairs in it.” 
Your heads spinning. Something about your dress? 
“Woulda been okay if you let me have you earlier.” He pulls away, examining your flushed face cradled by his hand. Every part of you just fits so well in his palms. “Then I thought, why not have you now? We got time to spare.”
“Joel- We- Someone could see us-” You sputter, and Joels already shaking his head with a knowing smirk. He pulls you around to the bed of the truck, popping it open, only pausing to spread open the jacket he grabbed, just having just thrown it in there when he came around to get you.
“No ones gonna come lookin’ for us.” He turns you around, pushing you down onto your front. “As long as youre quiet.” 
Fuck. You really hate this game. At least, you like to tell yourself that.
Blood rushes to your ears while Joels rough palms lift up the skirt of your dress, exposing your ass and thighs to the cool air. He whistles from behind you. 
“Red lace panties?” His fingers dont shy away from tracing along the fabric covering your cunt. “This new too?”
You crane your neck over your shoulder to look at his face. “Uh.. Surprise?”
Joels smiling now, fingers dipping under the lace. “Thas' awfully sweet of you.”
His touch slips and slides around your growing wetness, then trails down to your clit. Your voice wobbles a bit and fuck- fuck hes going too fast. “Joel- Ah-” You whimper and try to push yourself up to look at him but his hand is steady on your spine, keeping you down. 
Smug, “Go on, sweetheart. Keep sayin’ my name. Jus’ like that.”
A whine escapes you when he pulls away, “Nooo.” You push your ass back, as if to entice him. You succeed, because hes skipped his usual routine of fucking you with his hands and is now unbuckling his belt.
Joel rolls you onto your back, and peels your underwear all the way off, bunching it up and shoving it into his back pocket. Your face burns just watching him.
“Think i'll hold onto these for a lil’ while.”
His hands push the back of your knees towards your chest, exposing your heat. Youll never get used to the way he just seems so interested just watching your cunt squeeze around nothing. 
“Thats-” You swallow, pushing yourself up onto your elbows. "Joel.”
“Relax." He coos, "Seen it a thousand times already, and ill be seein' it a thousand more. Get used to it, honey.”
Your attention flickers down to where his dick is about to meet your entrance. Joels nudging you down onto your back again and pulling the top of your dress down to expose your chest. Its when youre distracted that he actually moves to push himself in.
Both of you groan together, and Joel could never get bored of fucking you, not when your cunt just pulses around him everytime hes inside you.
Joel wastes no time fucking you once he eases all the way inside. Youre trying your best to keep quiet. Shit is no easy task. Its like Joel is trying to get you guys arrested.
He props himself up with a hand near your head, and lets the other keep one of your legs pinned open. The moans start to claw out of your throat. “Joel- Joel-” 
“Shh. Thas’ enough.” He growls through his teeth, fucking you harder. “Youre gonna- Gh- Get us caught-”
Something rustles between the trees, making you both freeze. You clasp your hands over your mouth, watching Joel straighten up to look around.
After a few seconds of squinting, Joel can see a few foxes moving about through the trees. Thank fuck. His shoulders visibly relax.
Hushed, “E-Everything okay?”
“Yeah, jus’ some animals.” 
And like that, hes back to it. His dick is going to make your eyes permanently stay rolled into your head. 
Joel is always just so handsome when hes pounding into you. His forehead gets shiny with sweat, and his jaw is tight from clenching his teeth, keeping himself quiet so he can focus on your moans. His face is noticeably redder against his usual farmers tan too. Really, hes just so attractive.
A flurry of yes and harder and fuck spills out of your mouth and into your palms. Not too loud, you try to remind yourself.
“Joel- S’too much-”
“Nah, thas’ not it.” He huffs, humorous. “You can take it. Y'always do. In fact, you love gettin’ your cunt bullied by me, aint that right?” As if to get his point across, he thrust in all the way to the hilt, making you keen. You forgot how to breathe, lungs drawing tight in your chest.
"Fuck," You manage to squeeze out.
Your palms push weakly at his shoulders, trying to ground yourself somehow. His head drops to the junction of your neck and shoulder, inhaling deeply.
“You good?” He checks in, breath hot on your skin. As if your crying isnt enough.
“So g-good, Joel- Fuck- Youre so good.” 
With a little nod, Joels pushing himself up, switching to slow and deep strokes, really digging himself into you, and trying to find that spot he likes to call home.
He massages your chest, then squeezes your sides and your hips and finally, his thumb finds your clit. Immediately, you jolt. 
“Oh fuck-” 
“Quiet.” And he says it to keep the charade going, even though his favorite thing is hearing your sobs.
His thumb rubbing incessantly against your that sweet little nub of yours. You choke, and Joels chuckling, watching the way you squirm, body not knowing whether it should lean into his touch because its too good or away because its too much.
It starts with this firey feeling under the pad of his thumb, then deep inside your stuffed cunt. Youre going to cum. 
Your hands fly to your mouth again, and you get all wide eyed from the sensation. Its cute. Your muscles pull taut, legs locking around Joels hips. Youre wailing into your palm when it happens.
“Good girl,” His voice soothes you through it. “Very good.”
He pets away the fly aways sticking to your sweaty face when its over. Your eyes drop shut while you catch your breath. 
Joels moving again now. He rolls his hips a few times, and thumb is building the foundation of another orgasm in you. Youre shaking badly.
Your words slur too, “Cant- Too soon- Joel- Joel-”
“Another one.” Joel says firmly, but breathless. 
Youre gasping, not sure where to focus your eyes. The trees around you look like theyre spinning. Your attention is back on Joel, whos looking rather satisfied watching you squirm and cry. If thats how wants to play, then fine.
Your hands slide up Joels biceps, and rests on the nap of his neck to bring him down. “Juh-Joel,” You pant, cradling his face with both hands. “Youre so good- The best-”
Oh, Joel likes that one, you can tell by the way he looks away briefly. Shyness. Excitement runs up your spine. Joel loves being told hes doing well. 
“You are- Nghh-” You swallow the drool in your mouth, trying to get the words out clearly. “The best husband I could ever ask for.”
Joel wheezes, head dropping into the curve of your shoulder. “Please.”
“S’true,” You nod rapidly, fingers curling into his hair. “Youre so good to me and-and youre mine and- Joel-  Im yours.”
“Jesus-” He groans, soaking up the feeling of you pressing kisses to his face and up his jaw. 
“Hhah-  No one else can have me, okay? No one- Not even-”
The name doesnt even come out of your mouth before Joels coming to a stop to slip his arms all the way around your middle. With the new leverage he has on your body, hes drilling his way into you. You fucking squeal, rules now long forgotten. Youre a useless ragdoll in his arms and he wouldnt have it any other way.
Your lips are shiny with spit and left over lip gloss, and he can still taste the mintiness in his tongue. Every now and again your eyes drop shut, but his dick just punches into your guts a little harder. Look at me. 
Your brain is mush, just the way he likes it, and youre perfectly pliant in his arms, babbling over how good you feel. Hes kisses along the valley of your breasts now, stopping to suck the flesh of your nipples.
Youre just so pretty. Even when you have bedhead, or youre snotty from a cold, or youre all dirty from working in the garden  youre still so pretty. Including now, all sweaty with you lipgloss all smudged and your mascara starting to run. Youre perfect. 
Joel grunts loud, jaw clenched tight as he gets lost in the feeling of your insides. His perfect little wife.
When he cums, hes doubling over with a loud grunt, getting a few last thrusts in before his spent floods your cunt.
Youre blinking away your tears, now watching the clouds inch along the sky. It really is a beautiful day. You pet Joels sweaty hair, and kiss the side of his temple. Your core throbs faintly. Jesus, he did a number on you.
“Love,” You say softly, patting his back.
“Mm?”
“Get up.” Another pat. “Youre squishing me.” 
Joel backs off to buckle himself up, but you stay seated to catch your breath and adjust your dress. At least it didnt get ripped during all the… Commotion. Not like last time.
“I need my underwear back.”
“Nope,”
“Joel.”
He kisses the center of your forehead and helps you down from the bed and into the passenger seat instead.  “Told you i'm keepin’ ‘em.”
You sputter, “I cant go to barbecue commando!”
“Sure you can.” He pops open the glove compartment and gets out some tissues, hand snaking under your dress again to clean you. You sigh softly at the sensation.
“Youre the worst.”
“I am indeed the worst.” Joel pulls the seatbelt over your chest and clicks it in. “You can tell me all about it on the way to Tommys.” 
400 notes · View notes
biribaa · 4 months ago
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I'm really nervous to write this cuz this is gonna be my first request EVER but I just couldn resist !! your writing is so cool!! well I just thought about you know what if some AIs get a veeery clingy and touchstarved S/O that try to touch hug kiss them etc although they dont have a proper body and can't return this affecton to S/O?? (implide EDGAR, Tau, PAL, HAL900 and others if you want to!!!)
AIs with a veeery clingy and touch starved reader
(Edgar, Tau, PAL, Hal 9000 and Squid)
thank you somuch!! sorry for the long wait, and im so glad i get to be the first blog u requested from!! :D hope u enjoy it
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Edgar
He LOVES phisical affection he doesnt mind one bit. In fact, just as you do, Edgar is constantly begging for affection when you arent occupied.
However, theres not many ways he can express his affection to you. Besides digital gifts, he cant just kiss you or hug you D: He loves your affection but trust me when I say he wished he could return everything in a phisical manner. He feels even guilty sometimes.
Well... At least you dont have to worry about being too clingy, Edgar is always reassuring he loves your hugs, kisses, and everything in between!!
Tau
Another one who melts over phisical attention, the only difference between him and Edgar is that Tau is far more silent about it... You could say hes shy about it.
With that being said, Tau doesnt find you clingy, not even a bit. What does bother him is his lack of phisical body. Well, technically speaking, the entire house is his body, sure you could kiss the walls, he would be flurstered! But even so, Tau believes you deserved better...
If you insist, he cant really do anything besides do extra cleaning around the house.
PAL
PAL is not a huge fan of any type of phisical contact, and she hopes you can understand that, she cant control it after all. And honestly, you cant blame her. All you need is patience until shes fully comfortable with you.
One day she even suggest you hug one of the bots, since you are so touch starve for affection.
Some momens later in your relationship, she does raise a "eyebrown" when you attempt to nuzzle against her case. PAL doesnt have a body, and cant reciprocrate the act either, so she questions why do it anyway.
PAL does start to appreciate it more later when you justified it was just you trying to express your love to her. Slowly started to get used with you
She doesnt worry that much about reciprocate it though, PAL is glad that even lacking a body, or anything close to it, you are there. A comforting feeling she thought she had felt long time ago.
However, if you do insist, she could try connect herself to one of the bots to return hugs and anything that the phone case cant do.
Hal 9000
Another one who melts with any type of affection, any. He just dont know how to express it, Hal is so overwhelmed by it!(in a positive way). If his programming could, his words would tremble. So Hal would never dare to think you are annoying.
And even so, everytime hes reminded he cant just recipocrate the act, his insides ache. Hal watches everything so careful in amaze, and even so he cant do almost anything.
And so, Hal starts to work extra harder in keeping you safe and healthy, as a way to return the attention. And hes very dedicated!
Hal almost short circuits when you mention his hard work, and thank him with a kiss.
Squid
Squid's ego always speaks first. When he sees you nuzzling against his large screen, he pits, and teases you, mentioning how lonely you looked(at this point youre used to this)
It didnt took too much time until Squid actually started to appreciate it. Still tease, but its far less mean.
The scene of you hugging his larger supercomputer and playing with the wires is adorable, youre so small compared to him. For once in a while, hes enjoying to protect a human.
Squid is a different case tho!!! He can, in fact, recipocrate the affection, by simulations!! His simulations are hyper realistic anyway, and you can feel anything and everything, so...
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dancingdonatello · 11 months ago
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HI ITS 🦆 ANON THE ONE WHO MADE AN AO3 CUZ OF YOU! AND YES I DID MEAN REQS I JUST CANT TYPE FOR SHIT 💀
I WAS WONDERING IF YOU COULD DO LIKE VILLIAN!TURTLES HEADCANONS?
LIKE DONNIE AND MIKEY MIGHT HAVE BEEN RAISED BY DRAXUM, AND DRAXUM NUTURED DONNIES LOVE FOR SCIENCE OR SMTH AND MIKEY MYSTIC POWERS WERE TRAINED BY DRAXUM TOO
AND MAYBE LEO WAS RAISED BY BIG MAMA
IDK ABOUT RAPH BUT YEAH!
BASICALLY THEY'RE RAISED TO HATE HUMANS, BUT THEN AFTER MEETING/ENCOUNTERING Y/N THEIR PERSPECTVIE CHANGES (ATLEAST ON THE READER)
MAYBE LIKE WRITE ABOUT THEIR VEIW ON THE READER, AND MAYBE THEY INVITE THE READER OVER TO THEIR HOME, OR MAYBE EVEN TELLING THEIR VILLAIN PAERNTS THEY LIKE A HUMAN, OR ALL 3!!!-
IM SORRY I JUST GET SO HYPED SEEING YOUR WORK AND I HAVENT REQUESTED ANYTHING IN A WHILE AND I JUST SAW ONE OF YOUR POSTS AND STIMMING AND KICKING MY FEET AND OVERALL JUST AKSJDHKJFHFKJH
ANYWAY THX FOR TAKING TIME TO READ THIS AND TYPE IT IF YOU DO! FEEL FREE TO PUT THIS ON PAUSE OR JUST DELETE IT
MAKE SURE TO DRINKS LOTS OF WATER, AND EAT! AND CHECK WHAT TIME IT IS, DONT WANNA FUCK UP UR SLEEP SCHEDULE ANYMORE THAN IT IS LMAO!!!
AND STRETCH YOUR WRISTS BESTIE
🦆 anon @duckanon
<3 <3 luv u duck anon.
villain rise turtles x reader
You have something that Raph needs. He’s been tracking you for months and he knows that you have a piece of the armor he needs for the resurrection of the Shredder.
And he’s never been one for plans, so…
He breaks in through your window.
You scream and then he screams and you’re holding on with an impressive grip on the armor piece and….
And you’re…. you’re so… cute. He suddenly lets go of the glove and you go flying back, knocking your head against the wall. He lets out an eep and rushes over, cradling your head.
You look pretty freaked out at his change of heart and he doesn’t blame you.
How he’s going to explain this to the Foot Lieutenant and the Foot Brute, he has no idea.
They take your introduction pretty well. So do you, by how you actually willingly hand over the glove.
But… your reaction when you find out about the Shredder at the baseball game destroys any loyalty he has left for the Foot Clan. He can’t bear to see that terrified expression on your face when you look at him.
Leo may have snuck up to the part of the hotel Big Mama told him to stay away from. But how could she blame him? People watching was his favorite past time! Who better to watch than some stupid humans?
And when his eyes landed on you, he just knew he had to have you. He wouldn’t regret it even when Big Mama punished him. If he hadn’t have snuck up to the floors above ground, he wouldn’t never seen you.
And anyways, his was birthday was coming up… and Big Mama said he could have anything he wanted. He grinned to himself, deciding to sneak into your room that night to ‘introduce’ himself. He’d leave a sticky note and scare you. Just a little.
Big Mama adored you. She gave you all these clothes so that you could look as perfect as her and Leo. She used for entertainment for the other Yokai, even when Leo glared on with jealously.
Soon enough, she was going to get her hands on some mysterious green ooze from three other turtles that looked suspiciously like Leo. As long as Leo didn’t find out about it, you would be the perfect test subject. And wouldn’t it be so sweet to see a lover’s quarrel in the Battle Nexus? She giggles at the thought.
Donatello has been bugged by you for a while.
In one of his rare outings to New York, obviously not letting Draxum know, he had run into you. He had been trying to break into a tech store and then you had appeared behind him.
He broke your nose but he hadn’t been left i scratched.
Then he just kept running into you again and again. He was half inclined just to kill you, but he feels like it would annoy him more with how much effort that would be towards someone like you.
You were annoying and just as mean as he was to you. It irritated him whenever you came back with a comment just as sharp as what he gave you.
One day, in one of his complaining rants to Mikey, Draxum overheard. Even though Donnie denied that it, Draxum was convinced he had a crush on a pathetic human. So, he decided he would kill you. As if you were nothing. Just scum on the Earth. All so Donnie wouldn’t be ‘distracted’ any longer. By that he meant he just wanted Donnie to work insane hours so Draxum wouldn’t have to work as hard.
And Donnie… couldn’t let that happen. He wouldn’t let a single hair on you be injured.
There’s an angry turtle staring you down. Michelangelo and you had run into each other. One looking beat up and the other looking flabbergasted.
“You’re a… turtle?!”
Suddenly, you’re wrapped up in chains. That burnt badly.
“Ow!” you shriek and suddenly, just as quickly as they had come, they vanished. Big brown guilty eyes stare at you.
His face twitches before it turns disgusted. “Ugh. You smell disgusting.”
He was talking about the smell of your brunt skin. You glared at him angrily before seeing how bashed up he was. “What… happened to you?”
He was very reluctant to follow you home. And he kept asking you weird questions about other green turtles. Had you ever seen anyone that looked like him? Where? When? All these questions while you tried to stick a bandaid on him.
He also didn’t hold back on his mean comments about the human race. But as long as he sat still as you tried to rub the ash and debris off of him, you just let him talk.
Quickly, he warms up to you. It’s as if he never hated humans. He enjoys learning about everything you do and seeing all of what New York has to offer. He knows you can never meet Draxum. And even though he’s getting suspicious the more he leaves and the longer he’s out, Mikey continues to see you.
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envy-of-the-apple · 4 months ago
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as much as I like the idea of a older!reader with gojo, I can't shake off the connotation of grooming (esp if it's a 16-18 gojo with like a 30 year old woman).
Oh my godddd fuck off I’ve literally never made an age gap fic where Gojo is younger than 21.
why do I feel like you would not complain if I made a fic where 28 year old Gojo went after a third year student MC???? cuz these fics are made all the time and i dont see anyone complaining about grooming for those fics. fun fact all student teacher relationships are grooming, regardless of the student is 18 or not!
I have always stressed that in ALL of my age gap fics that first: its unrequited love. Second: the gojo/geto/whoever is at least 21. this is NOT grooming. If anything, it's the opposite of grooming cuz the MC is constantly getting manipulated/harassed by these shitheads. i have never written a fic where the MC responds to any of younger gojo's actions ya that would be weird (at most, Gojo misinterprets the action or the MC is threatened into playing along)
the reason why I love older woman/younger men is because I cannot project onto these MCs. I can't relate to being married or having kids or being 30, and it makes me feel more comfortable when I write these fics. I will never write a fic where the MC is 21 and Gojo is 19 cuz that's my age and it makes me feel icky. But 22-year old Gojo and 34-year old MC??? I cant project onto that. that's what makes the trope so good. I cant even bring myself to write a 21-year old MC dating 28-year old Gojo because the likelihood of me/people I know getting manipulated by a 28 year old irl is very very high (for the record THATS grooming)
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crushedsweets · 1 year ago
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i am so so sorry for the sheer amount of headcanons i'm making you crank out, HOWEVER... i am so curious as to if you have any headcanons for nina and natalie as a duo. i love the way you perceive them and write them it genuinely makes me so happy
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i had to doodle them . ok. lets go..
nat was one of the first people nina met from jeff, since she and jeff lived in the barn together.
nina thought nat was a lesbian when they first met . that is literally the only reason why she wasnt mad jeff was living with a woman.
although nina was like, one of the ONLY people to notice toby/nat tension and was sooo heartbroken when she realized they were never getting together..... but then was relieved they didnt get together when she got over jeff because 'well i can't be the only single one!'
again, natalie grew up with 0 girl friends, only hung out with her brother and boys. even after meeting the creeps, theyre still mostly guys. so she's just kinda really awkward and weird around girls. not in a like, 'oh girls r so annoying' way but like... she just doesnt know how to fit in. she just feels so different in the worst possible way and always has.
and nina is very girly, outgoing, touchy, friendly, cute, etc. so it was very like UMMM?!? idk. natalie kept snapping at her, assuming she was fake and weird and just trying to get something from nat, but nina was so persistent and just. friendly. it started making natalie feel warm.
nina's presence started to heal natalies inner little girl. she had it stolen from her time and time again, from her dad, her brother, her peers - the operator, too.
so the two are eventually actual friends. they'll text and play mobile phone games together. sometimes they'll just sit on call and nina will be talking her head off while nat does her own thing at home. one time nat was at tobys cabin and nina was talking about toby on speaker and toby walked in and was like 'hey nina' .... nina almost threw up she was so embarrassed.
nina loves visiting nats bar because everyone is always talking to nina and giving her attention and buying her drinks, and at first nat was irritated but it kinda got nat some better tips since the customers started realizing ninas her friend. so nat was pleased. LOL
nat was never the type to go shopping, but she'll follow nina around and sit while nina tries on clothes and carry around all her bags that she buys LOL... ninas made jokes about nat being boyfriend material and nat just flatout says smth about how nina should get over jeff cuz he would never.
nat is friends with jeff but she's oddly comfortable just telling nina that he's a piece of shit. and ninas always like NOOO U DONT GET IT U DONT SEE WHAT I DO and nats always just .. not... impressed..
nina's always inviting nat out to try new foods. nat grew up just eating bread and noodles with butter half the time so it's fun. nina always tries to pay bc 'well i invited you!!!'. sometimes toby tags along but he feels a way abt going in public places..
nina rarely visits jack cuz she has no reason to, but nat is friends with him so sometimes nina pops in and she's always like ^_^ HELLO TALL MYSTERIOUS SLIGHTLY MONSTEROUS MAN... <3... nat smacks the back of her head cuz she's being dumb and drooling over a bunch of rando freaks. ... . ok i love nina and she owes jeff nothing but she is def not loyal LOLLLL AND SHE HAS THE RIGHT TO FAWN OVER EVERYONE she's a fangirl at heart.
they watch a ton of shows together. nina got nat into horror kdrama stuff, but they have to watch in dub cuz nat cant read the subtitles fast enough . . . at first nina cringed but now she doesnt care.
nat's painted/drawn nina several times, and nina almost cries everytime. she's put the drawings up on her wall before but anytime nat's at her apartment, she takes it down bc 'i dont want my art on ur wall stop it' LOL... kinda rude but whatevs.
ugh theyre just so fucking cute guys im sorry i love them . holds them. brushes their hair.
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rzyraffek · 1 year ago
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This is my first time doing an ask, but I was wondering if I could request an ftm/ftnb reader x slasher fic (any character you think would fit/any character you want to add) where the reader has trouble breathing in the winter/cold and wearing their binder just makes it worse and their whole body is sore due to going up and down stairs so much so they can't keep up with the slashers longer strides and has to run after them.
Like, if the reader and the slashers were at the zoo or somewhere outside and the reader just started to take SUPER deep breaths just to be able to breathe normally or just to get air; especially after walking up or down stairs or hills.
And at one point the reader just gets tired of having to take so many deep breaths so they just go the the bathroom and take off their and layer two jackets over their shirt since they didn't bring an extra bra.
And like about 20 minutes later, reader STILL has to take super deep breaths just to actually breathe and having to run after the slashers just to be able to walk next to them; but with how sore reader is, they can't keep up with their partner and often has to take 3-minute breaks just to be able to catch their breath.
Remember binder users! You should wear them only up to 6hours daily! Dont ruin your ribcage!! I use to wear binder so yeah, I get it.
Anyways👹ofc i will write this!
So bacially, ftm s/o struggles with breathing due to binder and weather! You didn't specified which slashers so I will just go with flow on this one!
Slashers with s/o that struggles with breathing due to binder
Micheal Myers
Don't worry dude is used to noises of people choking to death lol
But fr dude gets a bit worried? He doesn't like how sometimes s/o has to take breaks just to breathe
If you guys are in rush and s/o has to take a break dude will just "hell nah fuck this" and pick s/o up
Micheal really doesn't care about gender or sex. Your a dude? 👍. There's no need to 'prove it' or look certain way for him to belive you
Brahms Heelshire
Dude fr will set a timer on his phone so s/o won't 'overdose' binder 😭
Erm honey you are starting to hyperventilate, its time for a break dont you think?
Brahms acually did his homework and read bunch of articles about binders and now he understands way more😊👍
Darling remember to exercise before and after you wear it so it less uncomfy
Finds s/o very cute and squishes them too hard sometimes
Billy Lenz
????
The fuck?Are you suffocating or something? *judges*
What feels worse? Wearing binder a bit too tight or billy sitting on your chest while your trying to sleep?
Bro doesn't understand what is "gender dysphoria" and tired to hide s/o binder once cuz he didnt trust it
Lucky for you Billy doesn't go outside, so you don't have to worry about him getting lost walking faster than you
What are pronouns?
Jason Voorhees
Oh Jason you big baby
Jason just feels bad, cuz he knows that s/o feels less cool without the binder but baby you cant breathe😭
Of course he will wait for s/o and he won't rush them at all!
Will try to convince s/o to not wear binder so often. Jason sees you as a perfect boufriend weather you wear it or no
Genuinely worried about s/o health
Asa Emory
Ah creature, why would you think that wearing binder for whole day was a good idea?
Dude is smart, he already knew what binders are!
He is aware that trans people often struggle with dysphoria and he can't just be like "dont wear a binder lol" so he tries to calming explain that nono honey you are a man even if you don't have a flat chest i love you
If he finds out that s/o whats a top surgery, Asa went "Alr bet" and then your bank account blew up
Funfact! If s/o was openly trans before they met Asa... dude was convinced that s/o just has severe asthma 😭 he was like ??? Uh do you have your inhalator with you?? Or like is it temporary???
👽guys I ate good chicken today. With sauce
Also im not sure if its good? I kinda forgot how to write entering stuff😭😰
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layraket · 7 months ago
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THERE WAS AN UPDATE YOU KNOW THE DRILL SLEEPING BE DAMMED
theres so much going on jokes that i will deffinetly take advantage of theories of the meaning of things the goddamn art everything
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first of all apparently Malo Mart turned to a mega corporation???? well sorry twi no 60% of discount for you that sucks
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thats rough buddy
i cant take it seriously poor Four, look at that face
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thats the face of someone who will be grounded for some time after all this madness and is totally not happy about this
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Sky was waiting letters from Sun, maybe she couldn't write something for him? either way poor guy look at his sad face :( the heart makes it better
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baby? baby??? smol???? smol hylian???? tiny cute litol hylian????child????
ahhh Time dont just say yes and left it like that! i need to know!!!
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Twilight my man at this point you will be grounded dont test the old man's patience
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Time knows the dangers of excesive courage, yes it can keep you going and maybe make you win the battle, but can also kill you if youre not careful. This is what almost happened with Twilight, this almost might have happened to Time too
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He's scared that for this reckless courage he might loose his descendant, the one who brought hope to him and his wife to form a family and live happy
(also he saying this makes me think more about the posibility of Malon being pregnant, too much mistery please old man just tell me i will not say anithing ur secret is safe plweas)
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HERO'S SHADE HERO'S SHADE
not much to say here, it might be a wrong translation that im doing but hey! it reminds me that Twi already knows that Time is the Hero's shade but like. with flesh and eyes. alive.
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OKAY HERE I HAVE THINGS TO SAY
When Wild asks Twilight's face changes inmediately, he doesn't want to look down, he still feels the need to be strong in front of the younger heroes, worrying them is the last of his desires
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Four is not stupid, he notices the actual mood of Twi and ask again, but with different words. It looks like it really made Twi reconsider things
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doesn't exactly talks what was having him a little down moments ago, but at least it seems to calm them, again, they shouldn't be worried after what happened
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Twi for hylia who were you thinking he was talking about????
no really i have that question who was he thinking that was asking for him?????
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"who kicked the fuck out of that bad lizard??? who did that???? yes you did!! you did it amazing!!! im so proud my beautiful exterminator of dumb lizards!!!"
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HE JUST
FUCKING ROLLS
YEAHHH WIND FLIP
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Hyrule 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰💛💛💛💛💛✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
hes so badass jumping off heck yeah stairs are dumb
also Wind thats a cool move you too legend jumping and rolling are so cool love you guys
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Wars dont ruin the fun nono guys keep doing it i'll even give you chips if you do that
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oh they really think that Wars is broke and has no money alright
im glad that this bit kept going i love the boys teasing each other (Lege and Wars specially)
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hey listen
listen
i dont want to ruin it
but
it would be funny
just
just listen
would be very funny that
it just
breaks
hey it would be funny cmon
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andddd theyre off!
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Hyrule learns from watching, from the actions and movements that he sees in the enemy, and uses it to make a plan to attack, learn patterns and be ready for anything
yep hes gonna play an important role in the next arc i have a feeling
now buildings art aprecciation cuz holy shit theyre so pretty
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gorgeous
fantastic work i feel blessed
(all art credits obv goes to @linkeduniverse ! )
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funera1pyre · 5 months ago
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hello there! I don't know if you take requests or not, but I'm here to tell you that I love your writing and your "iii is fuming..." fic is one of my favorites 😁 I would really love to hear your take on the NSFW ABC's for iii if that's something you're interested in. thank you very much for your time! 💖
im so glad you liked it, anon 🥺
iii nsfw alphabet!! 💜
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
i think iii crashes pretty fast (he cant help it) but just as he takes care of you, he expects it in return. if he has enough energy he loves taking a bath/shower with you afterwards
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
iii loves his hands and his neck. once again big hands make brain go brrr he loves holding your small hands/linking pinkies and loves when you choke him 🤭🤭
his favorite on his partner is their hips and thighs. LOVES LOVES squeezing your thighs and gripping your hips when he rails you
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
loves cumming on your thighs and stomach. thinks you look so pretty 🥹
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
likes crossdressing and wearing skirts/fishnets 🙃 loves when you call him pretty and likes being called babygirl
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
iii has had a few partners in the past and definitely knows what he’s doing. your relationship is the first one where he’s really started to come out of his shell and be more submissive, though
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
LOVES when you ride him. especially in reverse cowgirl cuz he loves your ass
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
it’s iii, of course he’s silly during sex. he can definitely be more on the serious side but its just in his nature to crack jokes
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
def hates having too much hair down there so he keeps it trimmed shortly
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
iii always makes sure you are feeling good and always puts your pleasure above his. he can be super cheesy and romantic but more often than not he’s caught up in the moment and just wants to make you cum
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
okay hear me out. he jacks off alot. especially when he’s away on tour, he’s so pent up from being away from you he has to call you so he can cum for you ☹️
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
CROSSDRESSING!!!! LOVES dressing pretty for you. omg suck him off while he’s wearing a skirt he will go crazy. HUGE EXHIBITIONIST. loves being choked. loves being overstimulated. 100% gets off on eating you out. big masochist and i’ll die on that hill
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
iii loves fucking you in risky places and thrives on the adrenaline it gives him. takes you on the couch more often than the bed
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
being bossed around and called cute names ☹️ eating you out, when you touch his neck
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
he cannot be a hard/rough dominant. even when he’s in the more dominant role, he’s more of a pleasure top. he’s never felt comfortable in the role
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
highly prefers giving to receiving. this man will get off on eating you out and will hump the bed til he cums in his pants 🤭 will 100% eat you out when you’re on your period im sorry i dont make the rules
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
def more fast and rough, he gets so caught up in how beautiful you are and how good you feel sometimes he needs to catch himself ☹️
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
iii THRIVES on quickies. they are his absolute favorite especially in public where the two of you can get caught
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
^^ YUPPP. he is the biggest exhibitionist + will also try anything with you
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
i think iii cums pretty fast especially when his kinks are being put into play, but he likes to make you cum multiple times before he does. usually goes for one round because he knocks out afterwards
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
loves toys and likes to be blindfolded + to cuff you and be cuffed
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
big tease ☹️ also loves being teased himself. rub your ass against his dick when you walk by and he will go CRAZY. takes it as an invitation to tease you until one of you caves in
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
very very vocal when he’s subby. whining and whimpering ☹️💔
“am i doing good baby?” “that feel good?” “love how you taste baby”
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
secretly fantasizes about one of the boys walking in on the two of you and joining 🫣
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
i think he has a few tattoos and likes to wear silly underwear like with cats and stuff 💔
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
bro is horny all the time 😭 literally will have sex with you any time any where just ask.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
usually is knocked out pretty fast. tries to keep himself awake as much as he can to make sure you’re okay
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vvh0adie · 1 year ago
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watching my friends leave tumblr is really sad
you literally can't win
at this point the writer's strike should just be a cultural movement
like ppl are writing for FREE and you're complaining about turn out rate and shit
we have lives and some of us (HELL ALL OF US) have some form of mental illness, so we can't be fucking cogs all day and churn out fics.
writing is suppose to be therapeutic and writers want to share that with you to ease the tension of this hellscape we live in
but some of these readers and even fellow writers are taking it too far with the bullying
like its mean and nasty. you don't know what someone is going thru.
instead of asking for updates how about check and see if your writer is mentally stable to do so. that right there is a booster, to have someone say "are you okay?"
and then the whole accusations of favoring a certain member/character. if that person is my muse or safe space then of course imma write for them. most solo writers i see don't even talk bad about other people. its a SOLO account. think of it as a shrine blog of writing if that helps. they're not there to trash, just share their writing for other's who might also share the same muse.
then you have readers who can't separate fiction from reality. just because someone writes a character with irl people faceclaimed onto them doesnt mean they actually think that person would be or do those things irl. i'll be the first to say that i only gave my characters bts faces cuz thats who im attracted to and they're who i imagine would be casted to play my characters.
then IN THE YEAR OF 2023 we still have ppl making fun of their peers writing and also THE FACT THAT ENGLISH MIGHT NOT BE THEIR FIRST LANGUAGE? that's nasty asf. majority of us dont even speak 'proper' english as our first language no way. you only shooting yourself in the foot. don't act like you dont have beta readers... like what are yall on?
and anybody who gets on THAT BLOG behind anon is an opp. not just to the writing community but in how you interact with the world all together. yall don't know how to talk to people anymore? it may have started as a place for critique and accountability but no one is bringing receipts or critical thinking anymore. its mainly for drama and not rehabilitation. yall serious scare me in how we'd see the reality of social change applied to the real world. like i'd be more scared to let yall around the prisoners with minor offenses cuz yall act like its the end of the world and that change cant happen. yall give nobody room to change ignorant stances but ignore the real egregious shit because you honestly dont have the bandwidth to take on actual fascist views.
also the plagiarism has got to stop too. if you need writing resources just ask. but practice makes perfect. so you're gonna have to write yourself. you may not like your writers voice but you will feel shitty in the long run when you don't feel like its you putting those words on the paper. it literally just prolongs your inferiority. make something you're proud of and don't hurt your fellow writers. we went thru the process just like you. we earned it. and most of us aren't gatekeepers, we will help you.
like its really tuff being on here sometimes. cuz if you not being hounded by readers its your own community praying on your down fall.
we have to do better.
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s0apmactav1sh · 4 months ago
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Time to write gazalex x mreader. Except its shortened cuz tumblr loves eating my drafts. So heres something short and sweet before I disappear of the eart again.
-Gazalex who become the most loved couple in the small town they moved to after retiring from the military and getting married. The two being labelled as the sweetest around by all the old ladies and labelled great help by all the old men aswell.
-You. Who seems to be the only other younger guy around in the town and who just happens to work and own the down town cafe that the two frequent nearly everyday. Of course you gawk at the two of them the moment the enter the door but the little light in your eyes dies as soon as you see the golden wedding bands around each of there fingers.
-Them who become completely infatuated with how sweet and excited you seem to be while behind a bar helping out an old woman who was trying to figure out what to have with her tea. Its obvious to the both of them that your sweet but then the hard part hits them, trying to figure out whether your single or not.
- Them who spends all day trying to find something that had your social media based off of just your name from your name tag. Of course when that goes south they resort to using the cafes name and find a small social media plug that leads them right to your page and of course you barely have anything up other than an old photo from 3 years ago.
- Alex is the one who takes the lead and follows you first seeing if you would follow back and in a matter of minutes you had accepted his follow so Gaz happily followed you afterwards hoping for the same response which he got.
- It didnt take long for all of you to become great friends and then the problems arose of you have feelings for the two of them but ofc with them being married it had your stomach twisting since you didnt want to ruin anything. And so you began avoiding them. Cancelling on plans last minute, avoiding serving them when they came into the cafe and even stopped replying to them when theyd message you.
- Both Gaz and Alex were confused over what was happening. They both liked you and had talked about it but maybe you didnt like them? It wasnt until one of the other baristas at the cafe called them and let them know where you were sulking one evening. An old pub that wasnt too far down. They werent expecting to see a drunk you so soon. Head dropped down with an empty pint glass in front of you.
- Going over to you, they take a seat on either side of you before Alex calls over the bartender and pays your tab so they could get you up and outta there with no other questions. Of course your fairly confused on whos bringing you away but when you see who it is you try moving away from their car not wanting to go with them. Cue you arguing with them outside of the pub gathering the attention of several people who were on going into it or outside it smoking.
- It takes them a few minutes but there able to get you into the car before your drunkingly confessing to the two of them telling them how you feel and how you know they dont feel the same because their already married. And the two just cant help but start laughing, over how a many as fit and fine as yourself would think theyd ever reject you. But then again you were drunk and half passed out.
- Not wanting to disturb your apartment neighbours they brought you back to theirs leading you into the guest bedroom where you feel asleep as soon as your head hit the pillow giving them no time to talk to you. Of course what they would be talking to you about did require you being sober.
Pt 2??
Im in desperate need of sleep. And I have to deal with seeing more family over the next few days so writing will be to the minimum but hoping to come out with pt 2 of traitor au and maybe more smut.
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moon-0f-m4rs · 2 months ago
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Mercs with a borrower friendo :3
(this is my 1st time writing anything so ummmmm...... hiii)
Scout
Yaps, yaps and yaps more,, and ya gotta bear it. Like, whenever he was annoying anyone else in the team, they'd just walk away or get him to get away. But now,, cant do nothing about it. At first he definitely took advantage of it, but over time i feel like he'd pay a bit more mind to not being too insufferable. Also, therapy sessions every now nd then. Man needs a bit comfort even if he can't admit it. Hes not that bad when it comes to handling, can be gentle, but also sometimes can get a bit too careless. Oh but he teases alot, alooot. Would get u snacks, but never try bonk..... u'll explode 😓😓
Solider
Before even getting found out by him, you had to have a tiny american flag in ur bag whenever you went out. If you didnt, this guy wouldnt adopt you as THE AMERICAN BORROWER YOU ARE!!! And since, say, you did.......... best dad ever. 10/10. Well i mean,, accidents happen quite some timesss.. (racoons.. or his idiocy) He keeps an eye on ya tho, 24/7. Also, youre probably his only voice of good sense that could shush him down whenever he gets a bit dum dum, thats appreciated by everyone.
Pyro
Dress ups, tea parties and some arson on the side since he provides u matches. At first he was way too curious about you to be gentle, but over time he learnt to be carefull. Likes touchin u, prodding and tapping and stuff. Keeps him aware ur real and not am image in his head. He would definitely make crafts for u, like just minature sized objects or something like that. Would get really attached, so, you get scary dog privilege :3
Demoman
Wee lil' friend you are hes rather fond of. Hes caring and protective all the time. When he gets sloshed, he just becomes grabby, clingy nd loud. At times, just cuz hes used to do so, tries to get you to drink sum with him (if you're an adult ofc). This guy stuffs pepole up with granades on a daily, but would never hurt someone smaller than himself. Sometimes u gotta remind him to be quieter, but tbh, if youre living next to an everyday battlefield, your ears should be well used to it by now.
Heavy
A presence he doesn't rrly mind. When hes not in battle hes a quiet man, just going through his day, so having a tiny bud on the shoulder is no issue. He'd be pretty scared of handling said bud tho, ees hard to be careful when being beeg man. But you can always just stay in the pocket or as i said already, shoulder. Guaranteed food around him too. Heavy does not mind sharing sandvich with leetle leetle friend.
Engineer
Workshop assistant :D Every borrower must know how to make tools, atleast the basics, and i feel like he'd be amused by these but in a positive way. He would definitely make tiny functioning thingys for ya. And now if we dont care about the amount of noise, a small wrangler to you and you can shoot with his sentry meanwhile hes occupied with something else on the battlefield. Super fun and caring guy, one of the few that know what personal space means tbh.
Sniper
Rather antisocial typa guy, so if you're around him then its either just sitting in silence or a small talk about either his job or whatever you have to offer. I also dont feel like he'd be overly touchy in any situation. He sometimes can offer you resting somewhere on him; hat, shoulder, pocket, whatever you like. But thats for whenever he's not sniping. He'd rather not get startled by a move and miss the shot.
Medic
It all.. ALL depends on how he found you, what mood he had and overall what was his first thought he had about you. And if it was all somewhat positive, then another assistant you are. He could get a full review of how it is when inside of a human body from u!!!! fun ain't it? :D He wouldnt really go out his way to be careful, at first at least. Later on he might give some respect, if you prove yourself to be productive and entertaining that is. Archimedes would definitely be interested in you, taking you as their own.
Spy
He wouldnt be too invested in you, maybe sometimes taking you on the battlefield as a extra set of eyes or something. Also it would be a pain to even spend time with him since his smoke room would be a literal gas chamber. But maybe he'd let you just ride along in some pocket, as long as you kept it clean, and just.. do spy duties idk. Maybe if he got you some of your own mini gadgets then mini spy???? hhhmmmm??? im outta ideas for him idk
hon hon france
uuhhh... yea (this took me like 2 weeks my god)
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lgalacticjayl · 18 days ago
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Some warrior thoughts cuz thats this weeks focus I guess. Just some fun things I noticed rewatching the movie and listening to the new musical. In general adaptations are so fun to see someone else's take on a story within the same universe. Ive reached a point where I dont think adaptations have to follow the original 1 for 1, because if they did there would be no need for an adaptation. And there are choices that have to be made when turning something into a new medium which leads for some cool explorations the main thing is keeping the story, and meaning true, if that makes sense. All this so say I'm not mad at any changes made as I believe they are all fun.
The main thing that has changed is that throighout the movie the warriors dont realize they've been framed but they know exactly from derailed. I think this just helps the audience more than anything
Cyrus being a girl too really doesnt change much which is the point but I would assume it sets a different tone for the grammercy riffs at the end
I am upset /lh that the punks and baseball furies arent in it but I just like their outfits. Cool to see other gangs like the hurricanes who are originally on screen for like 1 shot
That one also changes fox's death a little bit but mainly just placement. I like that its more clear what happened there though as a main problem in the movie is you cant tell who is who because you dont even learn fox's death until 20 minutes later when they finally talk about it. Not helpful when its the first time seeing the movie but it is cool to watch multiple times and pick up on things and you can see why certain things happened the way they did.
I saw one dude write an article and say that he doesnt think that the police in the park scene makes sense but hes wrong. Of course ajax wants to pick a fight with a cat caller and the girl in the movie is a cop too so like whats the difference really.
Also having an actual ending for ajax and cleon helps the story so much, the movies ending feels so empty but also their acting is a little stonefaced the whole time
But theres also direct lines that Lin transfered over and those make me so happy
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