#i cant even be useful. i got nothing
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vagueiish · 9 months ago
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community is such a fucking farce. no one person is gonna want me around when i have nothing to offer; there’s simply no way i’m going to find a group of people who love and accept me for who i am bc who i am is a whole lot of nothing
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oneday-yourside · 7 months ago
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Harry's world/Bad end
Inspired by Christina's world by Andrew Wyeth
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mrmeepsmadmind · 1 month ago
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rewatching this over and over again.. mainly bcs tarn makes soundwave into a manlet but also bcs it's hilarious
#thunderhowl at the copilot doing Absoluteky nothing then being surprised when shadowstriker is unfamiliar with the terrain: :D#i get ure a theater kid but CAN U STOP BEING SO CRYPTIC#bumblebee moving to the wall like the only smart person#optimus just wants to find the source#had to include soundwave being the bitchiest person for no reason at the end of course 🩵 mi lady#somebody help tarn bro only has one arm 😭😭#hes not even using it against a wall or anything like hes just trying to keep his balance#everybody panicking while shadowstriker doesnt give a fuck#girlboss shit she does every day and no one cares it pisses me off yall need to appreciate my mean lesbian like yall appreciate her mean gay#bestie#thunderhowl :) bcs he wants soundwave to struggle probably. i mean at the cost of others maybe risking a concussion? sure#theyre both so petty but try to act too cool to be in their own lame ways. im obsessed with them#he was hoping soundwave was gonna land in his lap 💔#somehow from all the way back there LMFAO if his terrains can defy gravity so can his beloved annoyance ok. he believes#im a filthy multishipper so i need tarn and soundwave to have more fic & kiss too bcs it's literally tarn being like I Know What You Are#(a Bttm) to soundwave and soundwave having to screw his lips into a smile & be like teehee of course.. only to be like (u forgot the Brat*)#at the end like. why are they like that. tarn holding him by the waist with 1 arm being like i got u bbgirl meanwhile hes getting#60000 concussions and soundwave is trying So hard not too laugh.. TOO loudly. (tarn thinking hes so anime protag rn)#tf cyberverse#soundwave#tarn#thunderhowl#shadowstriker#bumblebee#optimus prime#maccadam#transformers#I CANT BELIEVE I HAD ENOUGH ROOM FOR THESE TAGS!
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harbingersecho · 8 months ago
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grif's surgery but just a little more... obvious?
I actually rly rly ADORE frankengrif but I don't have an in-show reason why he'd have extensive long-term allogeneic skingrafts on his face 😔
#rvb#red vs blue#dexter grif#grif#*24#mine#art#cw wounds#Look I love biology stuff like this so I like researching what would be at least semi-plausible even if it's just for a dumb halo show that#makes 0 sense where CPR cures a headshot but i cant help it!!! and like the 'lazy' reason for it would be sarge is just crazy like that but#its not a good reason imo. and like the things he lists needing replacement are mostly internal and body parts which makes sense#considering how grif got injured by sheila like I could 100% see that rupturing organs and crushing his hand and there being burns etc#but like nothing points to grif needing any surgery above the neck and i dont think anyone mentions his face being different? i could#make up injuries for him but nothing in the show actually supports that he'd need grafts for anything but his body..#I'm SOO ready to be convinced otherwise btw like I said I want an obvious frankengrif to be true so bad !!#AGH would it be too insane of me to make like a surgery/injury overview thing for grif just so i can convince myself abt this idea...#i can bend to some fun stuff tho im not a total joykill u know! thats why i give his body the mismatched donor skin look despite allogeneic#grafts not being permanent w/ current tech. like it really doesn't matter if it's realistic or whatever but also Yes It Does.#and like during/after chorus would grey offer to 'fix' it? i imagine the feds could mesh a skin so they could use grif's own skin..#or like during rats nest when they got reassigned?
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ganondoodle · 3 months ago
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so with echoes of wisdom .. i havent watched any of the trailers beyond the very first one and the thumbnails/screenshots and what others have said about it-
but with the world inside the rift being called "Welt des Nichts" aka "world of nothing/void" in german ('still' in english, for some reason) and demises title in french being "avatar of nothing" ... yeah my anxiety is shooting through the roof again
(hopefully you can be a little more forgiving for me being anxious/weird about it bc demise is my blorbo)
i had similar worries with totk, that werent proven true thankfully, but the darn book is making it all worse again with all those weird lore things the game doesnt even so much as hint at AND potential retcons- im in for a really rough time huh, not just stress in real life (more in tags.. its alot) but now about my specific hyperfixation from two things even (AND artblock still..)
weird as it may sound, i dont want demise to get more lore, partly bc i dont believe theyd do anything with him that i would like (given their track record) but much more importantly- the fact that he has this little lore about him is precisely one of the reasons why i fell in love with him, i tend to like characters that are neglected by the narrative, and his story being both so flat and already done meant i can be very creative with what i come up with for him without necessarily contradicting anything in canon (which is ... or was a big point of how i wrote destiny's story and lore, working with canon in a way that reframes it all without straight up ignoring it ... but i suppose i urgently need to let go of that and accept i spend alot of time working things that will go to waste :( ) AND not having to worry that there will be more stuff with him that would massively change not only what im writing but also potentially how i feel about him since the game he was briefly in was the oldest chronologically and ended with his death- i didnt expect them to mess with anything that far back and thought theyd just go forward and leave the timeline behind and wouldnt mess with it again, given how botw seemed to be a sort of 'fresh start' that seemingly regarded the past as the past that needs to rest and that the timeline was finally no longer a discussion if everythings unified through botw and one thing going forward
but i suppose i was very wrong with that .__.
right now the only thing that motivates me still is the left over determination and spite to work on my zelda comic, since i have never gotten this far and really want to get something done for once, but i cant lie that im feeling like i should pause all work on it too to wait and see waht the book and the new game will do .. either to determine if i still have the will to keep working on it after those things are out (my love for tloz has been taking alot of hits lately ..) or if i have to change stuff (mostly bc of my lore problem trying to not ignore it ..)
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#ganondoodles rants#sorta#suicide attempt mention in the IRL stuff im talking about in the following tags btw#theres some construction stuff on our house going on#and my father is extremely stressed about it#he used to be very explosive- being silent and then exploding out of nowhere .. probably left me with lasting damage yippie-#but now he much more lets it eat at himself bc hes old and feels bad for the past stuff so now it makes him irritated and depressed#my older brother is the most normal cis straight guy you can imagine and incredibly impatient and bossy (you CANNOT talk with him)#(brother doesnt live in our house)#and while hes helping out hes doing it exactly how my father doesnt like and since you cant talk to the guy (explosive +200) it stresses hi#to the point of my father yesterday saying that “it would have been better if i had just died back in the day”#likely referring to the time when he was drafted for the military against his will and tried to kill himself#which i learned only like .. a year ago- theres so little my parents tell me ....#its like my mother telling me- while my father was in hospital for heart surgery- that she not only almost died back when i was a young tee#and only survived bc of some incredibly unebelievable lucky coincidences (medics on a travel being there that knew what she had-#-while our local doctors said welp- nothing we can do lady AND them beign there with a helicopter and emergency transferring her#to antoher bigger hospital while giving her immediate treatment our local one didnt do- AND at the big one just so happened to have-#-an expert on that illness in the facility when she arrived who was able to narrrowly save her life#BUT ALSO while she was recovering and weak and frail as a dust bunny witnessing someone stealing hospital surplies-#not noticing she was in the room at first (which .. the nurses left her in the nurse room while going on break ... which uhm .. yeah cool)#and if my mother hadnt acted in time like she was fully asleep and the lady stealing stuff beign in hurry- she might have killed her#without my mother being able to fight back bc she could barely even talk (the nurses didnt want to believe her when they got back either)#ANYWAY that comment from my father brough me to tears#and my mom is trying out more ... other medication shes not prescribed in hopes of it helping agaisnt her many pains#but i worry it will interact with the other stuff shes on ...#and i worry so much about both of their mental and physical well being#always trying to be the one to calm them down or help with communication bc that is a big problem in this houesehold#but i myself am also a very much not normal and not medicated shut in who has trouble dealing even with my own feelings
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jrueships · 4 months ago
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r u the grew up poor never being able to buy the little things in life u always wanted as a kid so now u buy whatever little thing u want as an adult and struggle with saving for the big mandatory thing,
or the grew up poor never being able to buy the little things in life u always wanted as a kid so now u just never buy anything small bcs u had to learn to live without it and constantly try to save for the next big thing in 500 yrs
#everyones been asking what i wanted for my bday and i always say nothing#like i hate the feeling of getting somebody smthing just to get them smthing like personally#it needs to come from the heart for me. if it's for smthing big like a bday#now like getting someone a coffee judt to get them one on a random day is dif bcs it's just smthin random on a random day i can understand#but idk like as a kid into adulthood the only bday my relatives / guardians have ever celebrated was my adopted brother's n my dad's#the dad bcs hes a hyperconservative dictator lol n the older adopted bro is cus hes got higher needs#so everybody gets more money taking care of him n stuff so u gotta act like u care abt him according to the guardians#but like i never even knew bdays were that big to people. like i mean i know OTHER PEOPLES bdays are big to them#i find ppl who rlly love their bdays to be rlly cute. like i dont think theyre selfish or make fun of em cus theyre judt having fun#n like u only get one x yr bday so have fun with it!!#but for ME? my bday was never anything special n i dont think it is now#everybody feels bad or smthing for me or for not getting me nothing today but it's like?? this is the norm??? im cool with it#ive been thinking abt other stuff like i just dont have time to think abt the pleasures rn. i have to double on the pain or smthing#like my friends always laugh abt how i dont drink coffee/tea or alcohol bcs u cant be in the medical field without a lil smn smn#& it's like idk ! i like ppl that do do that kinda stuff but like! i never grew up with that & it just feels odd to do it now kinda thing#idk im very cheap but also i will use the fact that im cheap on the small stuff to justify wanting to make a big purchase#i have a weird relationship with buying things for myself vs for others like 4 others i will buy watever u want bro#sugar papi ted#hey heres this idk insert raccoon bracelet bcs u like raccoons n love wearing bracelets so i thot of u n bought it#but if i buy smthing for me it has to have a dual purpose or smthing#i got to have a free dessert today n chose the churros over the tres leches cake slicr cus u can judt make the cake#but i dont own a deep fryer so i cant make churros n storebought churros just arent the same#like im just always idk comparing or needing to know the use of things yanno#if i do smthing. i have to see it thru. & it has to have multi purpose#i mean just look at my username jrue ships or jrue's hips like#im unwell when it comes to that#idk is anyone else like this#anyways yea this whole new thing of getting stuff on one day is hard for me like it just never matches up with my time#of course ill see stuff id like to have but like. ill just make myself forget it n by the time stuff like this rolls up it's like idk#i COULD get a new laptop but i got one that works just fine. i got an ipad on its last legs but can i still turn it on? alright
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bosspigeon · 6 months ago
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aaaaaaaand once again, i am spending too much time and energy making silly little avatars
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skunkes · 11 months ago
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hella1975 · 2 days ago
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there must be more than blood by car seat headrest is a touya song btw. nervous like a wild dog waiting for the attack. you go back to the old house but you've been locked out and it wasn't for love that you went back home. they had all of your life to get it right they had all of that time just to change their minds. how could they treat you like a forgotten card? dear dad, I'm sorry thank you very much. what difference does it make when they throw you away?
this is like 9/11 to me
#GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY FUCKING INBOX. THIS SONG????? i know i reblogged the art but THIS SONG AIAIA. REALLY#you cant say the words car seat headrest around me. and then touya as well why would you actually even start#I SAW YOU ON THE MAGAZINE COVER WITH YOUR BLUE WIDE EYES READ IT FROM COVER TO COVER LOOKING FOR YOU BUT THESE ARE NOT MY PEOPLE HERE#I THINK YOU KNOW THAT NERVOUS LIKE A WILD DOG WAITING FOR THE ATTACK#I WAS LIVING IN THE DELTA WASTING MOST OF MY TIME YOU KNOW IF I COULD CLOSE THE BLINDS RIGHT I COULD SLEEP ALL THROUGH THE NIGHT#BUT IVE SEEN THE TIDES RISING WHERE ONCE THERE WAS A SHORE#I CAN STILL REMEMBER HOUSES STRIPPED TO THE FLOOR THERE MUST BE MORE THAN BLOOD THAT HOLDS US TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!#THERE MUST BE MORE THAN WIND THAT TAKES US AWAY THERE MUST BE MORE THAN TEARS WHEN THEY PULL BACK THE CURTAIN#OF THIS MUCH I AM CERTAIN!!!!!!!!!! WHEN YOU'RE DOWN FOR A WHILE TRYING TO GET DRIED OUT YOU FEEL TIME PASS BY BUT YOU DONT LOOK AROUND#YOU WERE PLAYING YOUR MUSIC BUT YOU GOT DROWNED OUT YOU GO BACK TO THE OLD HOUSE BUT YOUVE BEEN LOCKED OUT!!!#AND IT WASNT FOR LOVE THAT YOU WENT BACK HOME!!!! IT WAS THE GUILT IN YOUR THROAT LIKE YOU SWALLOWED A BONE!!!#THEY HAD ALL OF YOUR LIFE TO GET IT RIGHT!!! THEY HAD ALL OF THAT TIME JUST TO CHANGE THEIR MINDS!!!#AND YOURE GRATEFUL FOR THE BUS ITS A PLACE TO SIT DOWN LIKE A SPIDER IN THE WINTER TRYING NOT TO BE FOUND#NO USE TRYING TO HEAL WHEN YOURE GETTING STEPPED ON NO USE SELLING YOUR SOUL WHEN YOURE GETTING PASSED ON#HOW COULD THEY TREAT YOU LIKE A FORGOTTEN CARD?? DEAR DAD IM SORRY! THANK YOU VERY MUCH!#WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE WHEN THEY THROW YOU AWAY IS ANYBODY EVER GONNA HEAR WHAT YOU HAD TO SAY I WAS FLYING ON A REDEYE#MY HAND DROPPED TO THE AISLE I COULD SEE MYSELF CLEARLY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A WHILE THERE WAS NOTHING BUT LINES#NOTHING BUT OUTLINES MY GUT SANK LIKE A STONE BUT I HEARD ANOTHER VOICE SAY WE ALL WALK ALONE! THERE MUST BE MORE THAN BLOOD!!!!!#ask#touya todoroki
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spacedlexi · 10 months ago
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i forgot how weird people get sometimes when you add minnie to clemvi situations :/
#she is NOT a threat to their relationship. she is barely a blip on the radar#shes literally just here to cause problems#vi makes it ABUNDANTLY CLEAR that clem is her top priority she is so disgustingly painfully in love with clem its embarrassing#like girl i never doubted you for a second dw 😭#but its like people want to see vi hate minnie.. like they cant grasp that shes moved on without her saying she hates her or smth#all the conflicting feelings are just so narratively juicy :) some people cant appreciate this it seems#and then theyll use it as an excuse to say clemvi sucks like okay everybody pack it up#people projecting their insecurities perhaps? (i know the answer)#and like even a captured vi who was manipulated into trusting minnie ends up getting her eyes burned out for it#like they both went down there but only vi got hurt?? and separated from minnie? hm interesting#clem fighting her own trauma of trusting the wrong people with vi continuously reassuring her nothings changed she loves her#clem would appreciate that. i definitely think shes fighting jealously demons but is just good at pretending she doesnt care#she makes too many Faces about it for me to think shes casual about the whole thing#but i think after their conversation in the dorms in ep3 clem isnt worried anymore. and vi proves she can trust her again and again#THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH theyre disgusting its disgusting :)#minnie isnt a threat to their relationship shes just a threat to their lives :)#twdg#it speaks
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bicon-crange · 2 months ago
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hiiii here's more of my OCs! for fun and also for me I decided to redraw an old quick comic i did of two of them back in like 2013..? when i was a little baby..
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lavellane · 5 months ago
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im a eurydice = solas truther btw and ill die for my beliefs
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be so serious........ and lavellan as orpheus......
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#I NEED TO BE LOBOTOMIZED. TRULY.#i dont even know where to start i feel like i cant even post abt this bc theres no way all my thoughts can fit coherently lol#like the 2nd act/hadestown soul-selling business is just solas committing to his goals....#who would win eurydice/solas ''i walk the dinan'shiral - there is only death on this journey'' or orpheus/lavellan walking it anyway lol#to find them and bring them home again#also if the solas-is-a-spirit-that-mythal-bound theory turns out true then the hades = mythal parallels well. they are parelleling <3#''And the choice is yours / if you're willing to choose / Seeing as you've got nothing to lose / And I could use a canary'' HELLO????#ik the other popular interpretation is solas as orpheus but idk solas/eurydice just makes me crazy . it works so well#like theres that one interaction thats like#eurydice: “i havent seen a spring or fall since.... i cant recall”#orpheus "thats what im working on / a song to fix what's wrong / take whats broken#make it whole / a song so beautiful / it brings the world back into tune''#and thats very solas coded. BUT its also such a good parellel to high approval lavellan's fixing the world thru the inquisition/anchor#and thru their kindness and curiosity and all the things he thought were lost in arlathan. the things that make him think maybe shes Real#and it could all be real and worthwhile.#solas recognising the depth and personhood of lavellan thru their [from his pov endearingly naive] actions and spirit#''i havent seen a spring or fall since...i cant recall'' / ''you show a wisdom i have not seen since.... since my deepest journeys into the#ancient memories of the fade'' what if i lost my entire goddamn mind. what if i just completely lost it lol#ok im done im so sorry i feel like harrassing every single person ive ever met with this information like idek what to do with myself lol
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todayisafridaynight · 9 months ago
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being daigo in january 2017 was probably the happiest month of his life because he just got out of jail Again for a crime he didnt commit Again and he's probably thinking how he has to keep running the tojo clan if he wants to respect kiryu even though hes """""""'gone""""""""" or whatever and then some bitch with the newspaper in his ear like 'the governor's trying to evict us what should we do' and i can only imagine the LOUDEST sigh of relief this man had to internalize as he began to flesh out his two-year plan then and there
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crimsongrimoire · 9 months ago
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masochist wrio is real. To Me.
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jrueships · 3 months ago
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im going into my new work tomorrow, first time ever😐
#i was supposed to go in yesterday but um#so basically i did whatever training i was never even aware existed on a platform i was never told of#which has progress for every lil step i do so my manager literally could see i hadnt even logged on n couldve warned me any time#but never did 4 some reason. like even a days notice like heyyy have u gotta blah done n not as im abt to exit to work#BUT ANYWAYS so i tell her i got it done n shes like awesome i make new schedule (since she said we have 2 completely rid the old one#i dont get an update until 4 days later. all she did was add THREE training days (im supposed to have 6 cus it's a hard job)#on TOP of my old schedule. so i have 3 days i know are training days and then a solo day bcs that solo day was going off my old schedule#so it's like. which days do i go on then. bcs u said i cant come in at all bcs we'll have to make a completely new schedule#and then the new schedule is just. 3 added days. on top of my old one#sunday i was scheduled for training & there was No trainer scheduled with me. it was just me#sunday wasnt one of the 3 new days added. it was from the old schedule she literally told me to ignore#n then all a sudden today i get an email from someone who was supposed to be training me (name not even on the schedule tho)#n shes like hey im in the building are u lost or smthing :)?' mind u im asleep . so she probably thot she was wasting her time for a good hr#i emailed her an apology n an explanation but UGH r u fucking serious?? IF I KNEW THAT WAS A (NEW) TRAINING DAY I WOULDVE WENT#I JUST WANT TO GET USED TO THIS NEW THING & IT'S JUST GETTING FUCKED LIKE I DONT EVEN HAVE A BADGE YET BRO#like i was suspicious of going in sunday bcs it wouldve lined up nicely with the 3 added training days#but manager TOLD me she was adding a whole new training schedule! i double check n all she added were THREE days! thats it!#how was *i* supposed to know sunday was supposed to be 1 of those days when ive been staying at home ignoring the schedule u said 2#BCS U SAID 2. AND ALSO. THERE WAS NO TRAINER ON THE SCHEDULE.#even tho the drive is far. i wouldve driven up there today to see if i could shadow if i had known there was someone to shadow there#bcs even if i was wrong abt the day 2 come in at least i wouldnt waste my time but i didnt even know if there was someone there with a#trainer title. so i just missed a day i didnt even know i rlly had. FOR NOTHING. UGHH. I FEEL SO STUPID. I HATE MISCOMMUNICATION#im so scared of coming in now. sverybodys gonna think im dum n what if i have issues training then theyre gonna be like#we spent all this time on bro n he had all this time 2 prepare n he still sucks like damn we should just give up#i would 2 but i hate not seeing things to completion so. ugh. hate it here. idk what 2 say. EMBARRASSING#i hate miscommunications i hate feeling stupid
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starlightartemis · 14 days ago
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a guy on the train just asked for my ig and he was cute?
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