#theyre both so petty but try to act too cool to be in their own lame ways. im obsessed with them

[mrmeepsmadmind]

rewatching this over and over again.. mainly bcs tarn makes soundwave into a manlet but also bcs it's hilarious

[cheemken]

sir... may i humbly request for more pokemon hcs... a small crumb wld do...

OFC BFMDNDK

But like majority of my hcs are of the champions so I hope that'll be cool w you hahaha

Anyways owo

•Hc ages, Wallace, Geeta, and Lance are both around 32-35 (Lance is the older one between them). Steven, Cynthia, Diantha, and Leon are all around 28-31 (Leon is the younger one, Diantha is the oldest between em). Hau is 15 and Iris is 17

-I have Hau as my Alola champion bc idk I think he deserves it hahah

•Diantha and Lance are easily susceptible of Iris' and Hau's puppy eyes and get dragged into their hijinks

-the ones who can somewhat resits them are Wallace, Geeta, and Steven

-Cynthia is an enabler, and Leon somehow knows when to say no to their shenanigans bc he has experience as an older brother

•the other champions are honestly a bit unnerved by Geeta, she knows this too but made no effort to change it, she thinks it's entertaining

-the others just try to keep up w her for Diantha

-Lance couldn't tho, Geeta just gets on his nerves and vice verse, tho the two do try to get along for Diantha

-its honestly very comical cause one second they're almost killing each other and the second Diantha walks in they'd both stop and laugh and smile w each other bc they know Dia would get sad if they fight 

•they all have their own little group chat and it's honestly just Steven setting up the dates for their meet ups and Cynthia and Wallace at each other's throats

-Diantha just loves the drama going on between those two, she thinks their petty arguments are entertaining

•Hau and Iris have this solidarity of being raised by their own respective grandfather

-Iris helps Hau cope w it, that at least there's still people who loves them, and hey they're family now too, together w the other champions

-theyre siblings to me your honour pls they mean so much to me

•Steven cherishes the other champions so much because it's the first ever friend group he has that doesn't make fun of him for his love of rare stones

-its really the only friend group he has that doesn't make fun of anything about him in general

-also the only friend group that doesn't use his status as heir to the Devon Corp for the fame and fortune

•Geeta almost doesn't have any concept of empathy whatsoever so her actions seems like she's being an asshole

-she's trying not to be, really, but that's just how she grew up and hey at least they're kinda trying?? To help her??

-well, she's really not like that w Diantha, or rather she feels more empathy solely for Diantha, and to the others that's better than nothing

•out of the public eye, Diantha isn't as elegant of a trainer as people perceived her to be

-i would ramble abt this but it'll be long na so hey send another ask if you want hahah

•other than their native languages and the universal languages Unovan and Galarian, there are a few champions that are fluent in other languages 

-Wallace can speak two other languages, Kalosian and Sinnohan

-Diantha can speak three, as it's often part of an act or she was taught back then, with those being: Paldean, Ransean, and Sinnohan

-surprisingly, Hau also knows three, altho he can't speak some of them, with those being: Kantonian, Hoennian, and Orrean

-Geeta can speak Kalosian and a little bit of Almian

-spare me tho, I made own adjectives for the other regions since there's nothing much abt em in the wikipage

Anyways I think that's long enough before I really start rambling so hey how you like it hahaha

[shhhhhiminsidesaitamascloset]

Personal Vent

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I didnt think a long time friend would block me on tumblr or at all. I admit, i was a bit upset and just thought their cold response online was because they were busy playing video games atm.

i went to go share my new fic w/ them and found out they blocked me. So it was what i thought. They genuinely didnt care or was annoyed i guess. Im not gonna ask somebody to speak to them or wonder why they blocked me. Or think that this aquaintance was built on something nefarious.

But im just going to take it in stride and not worry too much about it. Im just glad they werent my only friend and that i didnt heavily depend on them. People acting funny nowadays anyway and life is too short. People are just willing to snuff the light out of people with good intentions, and some are jealous. Some fail to see the good in people that are different. Or theyre just fickle for any reason.

If i'm your friend, we may disagree on things or run in different circles, but im not going to be petty and block you. im petty with strangers i dont agree with or dont know. But no matter how much we disagree i'm not gonna be petty with you if i think youre a cool person. Though maybe this is a teaching moment.

Maybe this is telling me to be more kind and not block people??? But unless we were friends beforehand i wont block you. Im still not going to care too much because the world is too envious and fickle nowadays. If i only got like two online friends then ok. If they betray me then i know that i wasnt meant to befriend others in this life or world. And i guess thats ok.

I was told long ago that i had to accept that not everyone would like me. I was told in church that the world will reject me. So its a soul crushing admission to someone who always wanted friends and a best friend. But im ok if God and Jesus are my besties at this point. If thats how it is, then thats how it is.

But if anybody is nosy and read it up to now, cherish the people in your life online or irl. You never know how important that friendship is to them and how much theyre willing to put up with to be your friend. If theyre a ride or die like me that is forgiving as i am and looks past the negatives. Do not take that person for granted.

Stop taking friendships for granted in general. Because for years i thought i had to change for people. When it was never me who was the problem. A lot of people in my life didnt care and were too fickle. they were jealous. They refused to see me for who i was! And im tired of trying to prove myself to people who are selfish and only care about themselves.

crying! getting rsd because they refuse to text me back! putting up with what felt like abuse and neglect. Im freeing myself for forgiving those who have treated me less than. forgiving people who were jealous or didnt like how i shined my light. i never tried to commit unalive because of how people treated me and im still here watching this world go to crap because too many people pull the "woe is me" crap and only care about themselves.

too many people blame God but dont realize they perpetuate their own demise. they see anything with a semblance of good and assume its bad. Forgetting that i was even a proshipper at one point in my life. i was pro lgbtq+. i was all that s*** even a feminist! Yet when i switch teams and go my own path im bad for it!

If yall think im some horrible person for standing by what i believe even though ive always been first and foremost a lover! not a hater! Then some of you need to reevaluate yourselves and look in the mirror. I know im not perfect! I never was and neither were yall! At least im aware to admit that with my whole chest!

But like i said imma stop blaming people for my issues. Imma stop getting sad when i get rejected. Imma stop worrying why nobody will text me back. if yall fickle like that then maybe its a good thing you left. Maybe this was for both of us to move on. Ive lost alot over the years. i struggle. But im refusing to let anyone take my shine away from me. no more.

you never know loss or rejection until it happens to you. and too many of yall go around like your loner status is bulls*** and that you have more people in your life than you like to admit. or act as if you dont need people to talk to. Either youre very priveledged or miserable pretending to be ok. Especially (lemme just say it) if you dont have God or Jesus in your life.

You try to go for inclusion then ostracize people you have your own bias or prejudices against. Liars and hypocrites! Then i cant speak my mind because its wrong to believe something "my oppressors" believed. Its not the religion its the people! Its not the race its the people! When you take away politics, race, sexual orientation, disability, gender, etc. Its the person. Its the people who hate. The individual person. And hate isnt exclusive to people who oppress you. You and your community can hate too. You just dress it up as ✨️prejudice✨️ you cant fight fire w fire. You can put evil against evil!

Yet here i am. I'm willing to put all that aside. Im willing to get slapped, neglected, spat on, and abused to learn the true meaning of forgiveness and what it means to forgive. what it means to turn the other cheek and rise above hate and evil. Like after all after we die none of this trivial mess will matter at all. And if yall are sick of injustices, sick of how people treat each other, sick of the evil bulls***. Then why not rise above it and do better?

Also self reflection is a good thing. When you start wanting to live life with better principles and a better heart its always a good thing! and the best thing to learn from all this is that you'll never know if your friends are on opposing sides until you bring up stuff like politics and religion. Stop making that your identity and talk about your favorite shows and anime. gravitate to likeminded people. And learn to agree to disagree or walk away.

But with me im just built different. I'll befriend anyone until they talk about hate for something or blaspheming God. Even then im patient because im aware not everyone thinks like me. And im constantly misunderstood. Even though i could go for others who think like me, im willing to befriend people that dont agree with me and show them the most love. Some i wouldnt like to interact with but i'll still love from a distance.

Love is suppose to conquer all right? thats what its all about? So i'll do that. i'll love. i'll forgive even people who wrong me. I'll never stop trying to be the best version of me. this planet can suck an egg if it thinks im going to crumble and become bitter. im going to be that annoying positive person from now on. Because insurance companies dont care about getting me therapy and i still know a bit about cognitive behavioral therapy to know that with christianity it can work. By God it will.

Yall are not going to make me bitter and sad like yall. im sorry. I actually wanna live and go somewhere where im not suffering. And im not a masochist. I got too much to live for. Your feelings about me dont dictate me or my life.

i love you, i hope things work out for you, i wish the best for you. And take care of yourself! I hope someday you'll come to the realization i came to and treat people even the ones you hate. With love, compassion, and understanding. And i hope you'll find happiness and freedom from being the way you are now.

[killapunk]

the weirdest, NO, evilest, person i have every worked for

no real names are used in this piece. i refer to other weirdos and freaks throughout, sorry its a long read (i didnt intend for this) but its one of those things ya gotta settle into and believe me its a wild ride. this saga covers over three years of drama btw.

tw: mental health mentioned (inc panic attacks), chronic illness mentioned and mild sex references 

i am going to single out jess. shes more evil than a weirdo but weirdo nonetheless. pete is a secondary weirdo in this saga.

i work in retail for a long time. a fashion store to be precise. i started out in one store but transferred when i started studying at uni and remained there for the majority of the retail career. during my time there i had three managers, the longest one, who is also a fucking weirdo was pete. now before i worked with pete, before he transferred to our store. i didnt like pete when i started working with him, he annoyed the fuck outta me. but my life circumstances changed and my mental health issues got very bad AND i was diagnosed with cfs so i had to disclose it w him. turns out… he was fucking mental too, very understanding, super chill. we liked the same shit. great boss. 11/10 every time.

he would be my reference for every job ever���

…but. he started gettin involved w jess. now to jess. the main character in this piece.

jess had started at the company around the same time as me and we were always on the same level until the last year or so. jess was a bit older than the average age of staff at the store (17-20) and was 23 when this drama started. she had a college diploma, went onto do something semi-successful but related to her HND. but blew all her money, moved back into her parents and started working at the store part time and then onto full time. she was like…the perfect retail girl? small, cute, slim, bubbly… always looked cool in her uniform. customers loved the fuck out of her. 

jess had a bf when i first started and pete had a longstanding gf. jess and her bf ended things abt 4 or 5 months before pete and his gf. but i remember they started gettin cushy around about this time. im not sure if its cos im v sympathetic towards pete (a true kind soul who i hold v dearly in my heart) but even tho youd be thinking ‘boss abuses his power’ …jess was and still is fuckin manipulative and he has longstanding mental health issues and i just think she sorta got the ball rollin’. pete and his gf didn’t seem on good terms, i dunno the full story but it seemed like they should have broken a long time before the did.

i think the fortnight before pete and his gf broke up they were spotted hanging out together near where she lived. it was this hush hush thing that everyone giggled abt cos there was at the time talk they were fuckin. when it got out, after his breakup jess said she was ‘just being a friend’ cos he was ‘going through a tough time’. 

jess got promoted to keyholder even though she didnt really (at the time) have the skills or confidence to be a keyholder. and then she started to try and fuckin control the work. back during this time, everyone who worked at the store, minus literally 3 people, had worked for the company for at least a year. the store ran very well, we were always in profit. nothing went wrong. but. she started changing processes because it 'made things easier when she was opening’. like. she made everyone tally the amount of people they served in the fitting room in one box and tally the amount of things people left behind so she could make a sales chart. idk if that’s normal in other stores but like? it was just nuts and impossible to do.we always put deliveries away out the package but not folded in a particular way. she made everyone tag and (where relevant) hang items bc she had to pick everything in the morning. 

she became friends w most of the girls, including one of the supervisors. they ruled the workplace. it was a total gossip mill. she gaslit the fuck outta people. one already less-popular girl at work ended up quitting cos she kept blaming her for fuck ups, she kept getting write ups and it was impating her mental health. she spun people against her. less popular girl spoke up and called her a bully and jess acted all defensive and said she wasn’t a bully bc shed been bullied before? jess continued to fuck up the workplace. next she turned on two people in her own clique. one tbh, i think she was jealous of bc jess had always wanted to be a teacher and this gal was training to be one. the other girl was v like jess, just not a bitch… strongwilled, liked control. anyway, drama got to the point where they had to quit. waay too much drama for this textpost. at this point others started to notice n work became hostile. jess moved her girlgang clique to one of the original clique girls, a different supervisor and the other two full time staff members.

pete obv didn’t listen to people coming to him, as store manager being like… hey… there’s this major clique problem and he’d be like ‘nah everyone is just friends, jess is a bit insecure but yno things are good, people quit, its just retail. fuck it.’ jess accused everyone who didn’t get on w her as being a terrible person. those legit words. like. if someone said it was a shame x, y or z left shed rebut, nah they were shit at their job, they were a shit person. honestly. EVERYONE. was a bad person. even the nicest people in the world were the worst person, the worst at the job. she was a good person, she liked the good people. she HAD BEEN BULLIED AND WOULD NEVER BULLY. she threw the anxiety word around a lot.

once we had a staff night out and i got left alone with jess and pete at the end of the night in this terrible lil bar as i waited for someone to pick me up. this is a good point to mention jess was always weirdly jealous cos i was close to pete. fucking ridic considering he was 14 years older than me and you know my fucking boss??? this night, i was sitting right next to pete, we were both drinking, jess wasn’t (cos she likes to be in control, she even said it), he had his arm around me and was whispering something into my ear that was such a non-thing i don’t even remember. she got her phone out, started texting. he excused himself and when he returned he sat beside her. it was fucking nuts. i couldn’t believe my eyes. we had to basically carry pete out of the bar. jess said to me she was gonna drive him home cos it was on the way to hers (spoiler! it was not!). myself and pete did the open the next day. he came in wearing the same clothes. i mean, he could have just passed out and had to rush to work when he woke up. but. this guy went out a lot. he never repeated an outfit. i think jess took advantage of a very drunk him. similarly, on another night out, jess promised to drive someone home. said person got too drunk and thew up. jess refused to take them home and called them embarrassing, she gave the space in her car to pete.

i had a major bad evening shift at work concerning another staff member, kaylee. a gal who just rubbed me up the wrong way, and who didn’t like me. ill never know why but it was just one of those things where anytime i was on shift w her she would nitpick and bitch about me and just… make me feel not v good. she was possibly the laziest and rudest person i had ever worked with but someone got away with it?

i used her as a way to talk to pete about the general problems in the store (jess). and…it was fuckin surreal. i told him abt kaylee. i told him i thought jess was controlling but kinda laid off a bit like ‘i get she thinks shes doing it for good’ etc. i padded it out w a few other rly petty issues abt the store. i was actually really upset, kinda numb from life to properly let out my emotions. and then. he started cry on me. like this full-on grown man having a panic attack in front of me when i was 19, fucked on diazepam i should have never been prescribed. to this day i visualise it. me and pete were v close at this point, and like, he didn’t mention jess too much – asked me about the other girl and other issues when i came to him. we spoke about personal shit, all but jess. i kinda wonder if he didn’t have the panic attack if i would have told him his under the radar relationship w her was not on?

and then. pete sold me out in the name of jess. idk the full ins and outta everything but he had to confront the drama once and for all cos our figures were so low so he decided to blame it all on kaylee. from my understanding of the situ from a lot of ‘he said she said’ bs, pete had this big meeting w kaylee. was like. 1. do ur job right and 2. stop being rude and unapproachable. the thing is, although kaylee is rude shes one of these ppl who most ppl really liked, not in a jess/regina george theyre scared of you way but…like they thought she was a tv character and she was funny and honest. so i think she confronted some obvious allies, and jess told her, according to another staff member, that i complained about her. after hearing this i obvious went to pete and tbh, acted pretty dramatic (cos if you haven’t fucking learned already THIS STORE WAS FULL OF DRAMA QUEENS). as soon as i heard, i started texting him angrily on his day off. i remember folding something in the fitting rooms and he came up to give me a hug and i was like ‘HOW FUCKING DARE YOU TELL OTHER PEOPLE MY BUSINESS’. i confronted jess, in a lighter tone, cos i obv told pete (half) what i felt about her. jess played the fucking innocent role. like, she said something along the lines of ‘we’re both close to pete n he was so worried that when me, you and kaylee did those shifts together that something would go wrong. so he told me to keep an eye on things and that’s all i told kaylee cos she wasn’t sure why she was being targeted when so many people in this store are treating people badly. i didn’t say you reported her or anything, honestly!!!!’ queue more bs.

after this, jess didn’t bother with me but was never explicit about hating me. if there was a convo going on and i tried to join in she scolded at me for being nosey. if i was unwell (i have cfs) shed moan ‘jokingly’ that i always had to be ill. i think she ripped on me once cos i said i was late for a hand-in at uni.

her next real victim, however, was jack, my best friend in store and our supervisor. jack was getting fucked over in his supervisor role bc pete would schedule jess for anything managerial. jess started a rumour that pete didn’t trust jack bc jack fucked it at a meeting w the other stores (semi true but fucking up a meeting isn’t the end of the world). like. anything jack would be, jess would be on him. by this point 50% of the staff that were around at the start of the story HAD LEFT. jess had driven people out and had the new ones all up her arse.

pete quit. it was sudden.

not long later, facebook popped up with a fuckin ‘pete is in a relationship with jess’ status and pete has never spoken to me again. i left shortly after that, although our new manager was lovely i felt like i was working for jess.

jack ended up GETTING DEMOTED, by petes replacement who had no idea what a shitstorm she was getting herself into. the new manager PROMOTED jess and demoted jack bc she was doing all the supervisor jobs whilst jack was only doing midshifts. he didnt get shafted to the lowest pay and was instead given the title ‘trainer and authorised opener/closer’ whilst still doing the same fucking job. he transferred out, cos that shit is fucking degrading and within, like two months he was put back up his rightful position. yay for my forever work bestie. I

feel like this has been going on for too long now. i think this doesn’t do her justice. like…i cant believe someone who is NOW 26 and who got what she wanted after manipulating a mentally ill man caused so much drama and pain and tension in a fucking clothes store.

fucking horrid. im reading this completely exhausted and so i cant say much but i just feel like these people are always the ones who come out on top, and its so fucked up. im really sorry you had to deal with so many unpleasant people, and your friend as well. 

i swear mediocrity and asskissing is what gets you anywhere in this world, and manipulative cunts like this jess woman take full advantage of that. it’s pretty scary, honestly. amazing how far drama can go, huh. this is why i have trust issues.

i still hope she gets her ass kicked by life, though. there has to be some sort of karmic justice somewhere

i also feel like i should say that there’s always going to be people who won’t like you for some reason. even if you don’t do anything wrong and even though everyone else thinks they’re great. no idea why this happens, but all i can say is there’s really nothing you can do. so FUCK EM (in the most metaphorical sense as they don’t deserve you giving them the time of day)

[kakyoin-did-you-lay-this-egg]

please, please quench my unending thirst for the stands and provide me with some headcanons involving the duwang boys (and yukako, please) with a soft, affectionate romantic interest who is very fond of their stands - they're always holding their hands, and stealing quick little kisses when they think the user isn't paying attention, and always have nothing but nice things to say about them and their abilities ♥ thank you so much, i am dyi n g （ゝω・）

First of all, I love you. Secondly, I love this request. Im sorry this took so long, I was trying to cut back on everything and this is about as minimal as I could get so I apologize immensely 

Josuke

- When he first introduced Crazy Diamond to them, he was expecting things along the lines of ‘So cool!’ or ‘Oh wow!’, so seeing them fawn over ‘how adorable’ Crazy D is kinda shocks him

- He likes to bring Crazy D out whenever he thinks youre not paying him enough attention. He knows how much you love Crazy D and would use any given opportunity to kiss his soft lips

- Depending on if you also have a stand, sometimes a wild Crazy D will appear to give you or your stand smooches in class

- When youre walking home or just chilling, if Josuke is holding your hands, he will bring up his trusted spirit friend to hold the other. This is why you have 2 hands, so don’t be shy

- Crazy D is the stand most likely to steal smooches when his user isnt looking. When Josuke feels the soft touch of your lips through the phantom feeling of his stand he blushes

- Sometimes if Josuke is too shy to show you affection, this is then his handy dandy stand will come to the rescue!

- Please squeeze Crazy D’s cheeks, he does the blep thing & it’s enough to make anyones heart melt

Okuyasu

- He is hesitant at first, Since The Hand can like, ya know, erase you from existence and whatnot. But after youve told them both ‘yes it’s okay’ and ‘yes you won’t accidentaly disappear’ you can see Oku visibly relax, but The Hand is still a little scared he twiddles his fingers when hes nervous it’s so cute

- Okuyasu knows that The Hand looks a lil sad, so when he sees you holding his hand or giving him kisses, he feels double the love bc his stand is basically him, right?? And youre just showing both sides of him affection, even if one is a large humanoid robot thing that can destroy anything in a single swipe

- Oku really appreciates the compliments, seeing as how his dad & brother never really had anything nice to say. Maybe that’s why The Hand is always so sad??. You will see him blush furiously, while his stand starts fiddling with it’s hands (no pun intended)

- Okuyasu doesn’t mind you being affectionate, as long as you show him some love too! He will sometimes get jealous if youre giving more kisses and hugs to The Hand than him. It’s nothing cuddling can’t fix tho

- The Hand is pretty shy, so most of the time your affection is returned with the biggest blush youve ever seen, please be kind to him

- Oku likes to pretend he doesn’t notice you kissing The Hand when hes not looking, but you can see the corners of his mouth raise slightly after each small kiss

- Oku and The Hand both tend to get more excited when the love interest is around, not only are they cute, but theyre so generous with their affection, how can they stay away??

Koichi

- Depends on which acts youre admiring. The first 2, yes, he will blush and scramble to compliment you back. He sometimes will try to show off his powers by playing innocent pranks on Okuyasu. If it’s act 3, he will be a little hesitant to introduce the two of you. I mean, youve seen the things he says, would you really let him near your love interest? (I’m a firm believer that sentient stands can say what their users are really thinking)

- If youre meeting Act 1, he will be almost as excited as you are! He just got his stand and is still learning about it, so talking to his love interest about his cool ability will cause his to seem a little more flustered and speak in an almost rushed manner.

- Kissing Act 1? Congrats, you broke Koichi.

- If youre meeting Act 2, he’s a bit more relaxed, he would also tell you about Echoes first act, and how his stand has not only evolved in ability, but looks too.

- He wouldn’t mind you kissing Act 2, or even holding him. He just asks that if you do, remember that he can feel what his stand does and asks that you don’t squeeze him to hard

- If youre meeting act 3, Koichi is gonna warn you first before anything. Telling you that his stand has ‘a mind of it’s own’ and that he may say some ridiculous things. So when you finally do meet Act 3, and not only are you surprised to see that your compliments are returned,but with flirting as well. When Echoes starts to speak things that may seem risque is when Koichi will have to politely cut in and either send Echoes back or ask for a  subject change

- Kissing Echoes is a gamble. There are always things that you don’t expect to happen. One time you gave him a kiss & he pinched your ass. (Koichi wouldn’t summon Echoes after that for a few days) Sometimes Echoes will make a show of it to let Koichi know ‘I’m kissing them. What are you gonna do about it?’ and then Koichi gets jealous and sends Echoes back again. Echoes will sometimes show you the same affection you show him thrown in with an innuendo and Koichi swears up and down he has ‘no idea here Echoes learned that from’

Rohan

- He will at first wonder why you have admiration for his stand. Not that he doesnt like it, he just doesn’t understand it, but still will bring out Heavens Door just to see you smile. ‘So youll leave me alone while I draw’ he says

- He usually brings out Heavens Door whenever youre around but hes busy sketching, so his stand can keep you company.

- If you show affection to his stand, he will pretend to not notice or ‘scold’ you.  But deep down, we all know that he loves it

- He feels like if youre kissing and holding his stands hand, it means you want to do the same with him, right??

- He will sometimes feel overwhelmed, what with all the affection being shown to his stand, and the fact that he works himself to the bone to finish his manga, he may sometimes be brash & call Heavens door back, leaving you to sulk

- When complimenting his stand, he acts arrogant. Of course his stand is amazing, do  you know who he is? But he can’t help the small smile that comes to his face seeing how excitedly you talk about his stand

- He will get jealous of his stand every now and then, and he feels a little petty for it. Like, why is he jealous of a spirit? Him, Kishibe Rohan? Unacceptable.

Yukako

- She takes amazing care of her hair, so finally allowing her love interest to see what all her hair can do will kinda be her way of showing them how no one else can compare to her

- She doesn’t really mind you playing in her hair as long as it’s where she won’t be seen if you decide to do a crazy style

- She does this little blush when you compliment her stand, after this she tries to show you more cool things she can do, even going as far as to help you using it

- She loves the compliments, and uses them as means to flood you in compliments as well

- She will come to you some days, saying her arms are tired from brushing her luxurious locks and asks (demands) you brush them. Mainly, she wants you to run your fingers through her hair, she already did all the brushing

Jotaro (cause part 3 Jotaro is my fav)

- He at first is hesitant to show you Star. After everything he’s seen, could you blame him? But once he warms up to the initial idea, youll see him tugging his hat down more often

- He sometimes uses Star to help him with his research, so if you were to, lets say, abruptly grab his stands hand while it was scouting the ocean for star fish, you can hear Jotaros quick intake of breath from the sudden gesture

- Jotaro knows his stand is powerful, hes defeated countless people, but hearing his love interest compliment him is different. He mutters his usual catchphrase, pulls down his hat and even blushes at the tips of his ears. Just don’t torture him too much

- The few occurrences where he has Star out for non educational purposes, maybe Star is looking at some of the many sea animal photos, you can sneak in a few smooches before Jotaro asks you what exactly youre doing.

- Star sometimes will convey the emotions Jotaro wont, so expect lots of mixed signals. But always listen to Star, Star knows whats best even if Jotaro doesn’t always agree

[chickenfetus]

ALL MY EGG (and for the four names: jae, killer kang, minhyuk (whichever one), and santa

deadass i did the 100 questions ask meme for this ask and almost posted it rip

🐰 what is one secret that you’ve never told anyone?

theres literally nothing i dont even know what to say ???? 

💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be?

not 2 be delusional but i would give up my world to hug changkyun

🐹 what are some of your favourite Pokémon and why?

glaceon is UP THERE idk why honestly but the sinnoh games were my first and i just??? i was really into ice and snow and shit u know so glaceon... thakn u

another pkmn ill always have is lucario ????? its just so cool?????

🌠 if you were in charge of the world, what would the world look like?

hopefully forgiveness and like???? acknowledging mistakes and learning from those u know jst positive stuff and like?? water. god i love water

👀 what was the most recent vivid dream that you had?

hm okay i think this one was from last night or the night b4??? and like???? idk???? i dont even know how 2 start tbh?

so im like hanging over at this two kid’s im a kid 2 i think place and idk we just talk and shit??? idk whomst the boys were tho

and then we get to a scene where its like??? at a train station???? and i go to the washroom to shit or smth idk thankfully i didnt shit myself irl

then i have to get onto the train which isnt even a train its like a carousel with seats??? and its like on a train track boys this is 2 much and i forgot to get ready my train card thing so the guy (who i was p sure was evil) waited for me to remove it so i got onto the transportation device lmao

and then once im seated i remember i forgot my jacket so i make like hand movements 2 the creep and hes runnig 2 me with my jakcet but the ride’s way too fast so i yell and say ill come back for it even tho im p sure i wasnt going 2

after that i wke up wild

☀️ what do you like the most about your best friend?

i dont have a best friend and all of my friends have their own unique qualities if i went into a rant abt them rn this will b so long

😘 talk about your crush or partner

[minhyuk voice] theres none

�� if someone was rude to you, would you be rude back?

ya bc im petty but it really depends on the person

🌟 what do you like about yourself? (must choose at least 3 things!)

my personality (the good parts)

my values

my taste in friends (my Big Friends are either geminis or scorpios good)

🐾 what are you scared of most? how will you overcome it?

the dark and bitch isnt gonna turn off her night light any time soon

🎁 what never fails to make you happy?

seeing my favourite happy, listening to the music i like 

💙 what annoys you about some people?

i jjust went into a full out rant abt this on the other reply so ill be quiet now

😤 do you get angry easily?

yeahhhhh 

🐇 what do you always daydream about?

my faves tbh

🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change?

bad people , gone.

everybody only sends love and happy things on anon

i just want everyone 2 b nice & friendly wars of any sort dont exist and no one wants anybody dead

🍓 send me 4 names: kiss, befriend, kill or marry?

if u sent jae’s name earlier id have trouble so im glad

kiss: tihis is so fucking embarrassing wtf minhyku (mx) but only on the cheek basically everywhere except the lips or anyplace weird

befriend: brian :-0

kill: jae goodbye loser

marry: sanha we can yell every time we gotta turn the lights off

✈️ what is your dream city and why?

tokyo bc its NICE

☕️ talk about your ideal day

cant read

🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert?

i suddenly thought of the word ambivore which made me think of the word vore i wanna delete im a both? mayb idk

💧 when was the last time you cried?

nov 3 bc my heart hurts whenever i see ppl being a bad friend

🎵 name 5 songs you love at the moment

oh worm

all alone - day6

with you - astro

dramarama - mx (even though it isnt out yet lmao)

run - bts (the superior bts song)

hellevator - / (i was rly gonna make this mixed languages but rip)

⚡️ if you had any superpower, what would it be and why?

to fly bc im basic

💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say?

dont do that

💚 who are you jealous of and why?

nobody in general????????? 

💎 which one would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? why?

intelligence i have 2 live somehow what if my money gets stolen

🙊 what are you ashamed of?

my humor

🌺 which languages do you know? which do you want to learn?

i (barely) know chinese despite having 2 take it all my life legends only

i know english but im bad at that 2 and its my first language once again legends only

i wanna learn japanese and korean 

🍀 if you could be any fictional character’s best friend/lover, which fictional character would you be?

the cow from voltron 

☁️ talk about your dream universe.

weve already discussed this

💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today?

oh w-0rm ok so im a regular anon on this persons blog and i wanted to send an ask but never got arnd doing it so im gonna send her one. soon/

🐬 if you could transform into any animal/magical creature, what would you be and why?

let me live my life as a furry and cat

🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike

are u ready 4 me to b the meanest person yet bc i sure am lets fucking go

so theres this girl. and i know her (unfortunately) and ive known her since like 4 years ago and back then she was already pretty shit tbh

she cried bc she had to sit in between the “weird” and “dirty” girls in our class and she headass cried in front of them and everyone just bc she didnt like the arrangement?? shes called the “dirty” girl disgusting before and has made fun of her in front of everybody its just bad :-/

now. fast forward 3 years and in addition to still being disrespectful and rude, she now vocalizes her weird fantasies for her “oppas”??? some examples: 

“when i go watch __ perform im gonna climb onto stage and then my mother and my future husband will fight for me” and she calls those kpop idols weird shit and basically sexualizes them/???? she says the weirdest fucking shit on her ig story and tags them??????? 

another thing. she went to korea nd took a picture of a complete stranger and posted it on her public ig and called him her “oppa” and said that they had a “fun day together�� despite the guy not knowing her at all???? she posted the pic of him??? i still dont get it tbh 

she wasnt even being ironic at all??? she calls herself & classmates “autistic” whenever she/others do smth dumb or mess up and its just sososososo fucking wrong

being one of the people to see how shes basically grown from bad to worse is something i dont fucking enjoy and i jsut want to leave my class already lmao 

ok but there are times where i do appreciate her because sometimes the class will be rly quiet and the teacher is basically talking 2 themselves but she’ll always respond w/o fail so thats great but its only bc she talks so damn much 

i just got a flashback to when she “jokingly” said she wanted to be a trainee for the rest of her life how do i just. god

😣 talk about some things that have been making you depressed/angry/anxious lately

we’ve once again already discussed this

🍪 what did you want to be as a kid, and what do you want to be now?

i wanted to be various things honestly?? ranging from an astronaut to a vet to an editor to an animator to other stuff i get influenced pretty easily so if i watch smth and i think its cool ill want 2 be that i guess?? ive been trying 2 get rid of that habit so now i have no clue what i wanna be

🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods?

sweets and chocolate cake

🍑 what are you obsessed with?

drinking water and staying hydrated

making my friends laugh is great 2

💘 what happens to you when you’re stressed?

acne LMAO 

😪 what are you sick of?

the usual

🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker?

i love scouting on sif and bandori so yeah 

💥 what are some unpopular opinions that you have?

lets not 

☔️ would you consider yourself a good person?

to a certain extent

😊 what do you like to do as hobbies?

use my phone???? send nice anons and comment on art/fics 

🎤 what’s the last song you hummed or sang by yourself?

none

🐝 what’s your worst trait? how are you planning to improve it?

my tolerance for ppl’s shit is so low

🎨 what do you always doodle when you’re bored?

my ocs

🐻 what’s stopping you from chasing your dreams?

i dont have a dream hence myself

🌷 what’s your mbti personality and why do you think it suits you?

infpt i dont rmb shit but yeah

🐶 send me 3 fictional people and I’ll choose my favourite!

falen i dont rmb what u sent

👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why?

i dont follow any :-o zendaya has had my heart ever since shake it off tho

🐴 opinion on day6?

ur rly gonna do this 2m e?

all alone just started playng this is terrible lets get it

so day6. a band i only found out about in late june (thank u boxy) and before this i only ever listened to bts and mx bc my friends stan them so i thought i was gonna expect boys dancing, the usual. 

i clicked i smile and i lost my fucking shit as soon as i saw the instruments because prior to day6 i was a big 5sos fan so this was rly resonating to me tbh and i was just !!! so fukcng excited??? i never intended to even get into day6 honestly??? but after witnessing how good they are and watching about all of the available mvs at that point i was completely in awe so i caved a created a stan twitter for them.

now, this isnt even the most of it. after becoming a fan i realized how much more these 5 boys are. they compose (if im not wrong) and brian writes lyrics for the songs each month because of their everyday6 project and again, im wow-ed because??? the amount of dedication???? they went from releasing 2 title tracks in 2 years to releasing 12 title tracks and 12 bside tracks in a single year. they havent released the december song yet but haviing to work on 2 or more songs in 4 weeks is fucking amazing if you ask me. 

theyre really talented and theyre just so versatile (am i using that word correctly) and each month their songs sound different. this project has given them the opportunity to try new things and you can hear the steady improvement in each of their vocals (dowoonie not so much since he barely gets lines, but we all know hes working hard) and if you listen to their debut song - kongchu and compare it to the version they released along with sunrise it just???? the drumming has even changed from the original version nd its so noticeable that whenever i hear kongchu from 2015 i know its the old ver

to add to those, they do vlives every week and although those vlives are always scheduled it still makes my day seeing them and watching them do the usual. 

one thing im upset about is that how they barely promote themselves, they rarely get on variety shows (the most is individual schedules) and we, as mydays never really get to know the boys so its harder to fall for them as a whole. i dont know if its jyp or day6′s decision but if this is how they want to be known for - their music only, then so be it. we still have jae’s presence on youtube, music access and asc. thats the most we can get and it makes it difficult for us to learn about the rest but thats okay.

another thing. their concerts are something i always look forward to (even though my interest has died down a bit;) their concerts are just so fun to listen to?? there’ll always be mydays who stream the concert so everyone else can listen to them play and they sound so good live it drives me crazy. mydays are always so hyped and whenever mydays sing along it just gives me goosebumps??? bc theyre so???? good????? 

tldr; day6 deserve more, following wise and promotions wise because they work so hard and once this project ends i hope they’ll manage to rest but still remain as a presence that will be known instead of returning to jyp’s dungeon.

🍋 do you consider yourself an emotional person?

there are days where i am more emotional than usual 

📚 share 3 books that you love and your favourite quote from them.

this is tiring

😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? does it help?

i sleep and boy it really helps

😌 what thoughts keep you going when you’re sad?

rest

🌍 which country do you live in?

singapore

🐧 describe yourself in 3 words

lame funny swag

🐵 which quotes changed you?

“rocky swag” - park minhyuk, 2017

💭 do you keep a diary?

nope

💫 who inspires you?

brian kang 

👻 do you believe in ghosts and why?

yes bc i love losing sleep

🎀 what’s your fashion sense like?

terrible

🎬 what are some of your favourite films?

i watched spiderman homecoming and i have no idea why i didnt see the plot twist coming but its GOOD watch it

🍦 what is one treasured childhood memory?

theres none lads

🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be and why?

all my internet buddies but sometimes i dont want to bc im kinda....gross

[mayardsale]

The clouds were suspended over the church as we found our car in the light spring rain. The cooler temperature matched Tara’s mood. Her exit from the parking lot matched her anger. “Please slow down,” I calmly begged, knowing full well that Tara wouldn’t. I’d given up hope after she ran the second red light in as many intersections. “Killing us both won’t bring her back,” I said as I watched her tighten her grip on the black leather steering wheel. Tara and Stephanie had been best friends since college. Last week’s bicycle accident was as unexpected a tragedy as any of us could have imagined. They’d ridden through those woods for 15 years with the occasional bumps and bruises, but the fall that took Stephanie’s life was a shock to Tara’s core. As Tara pulled over to the side of the winding highway, I unbuckled my seat built. She was in no condition to drive after the funeral. For a week she was a rock for everyone because she was the closest person to Stephanie in the world. She executed everything from funeral arrangements to financial specifics. Tara was everybody’s rock, but I wasn’t sure if she had sustained her own head trauma during her wipeout. “Can you pull over more?” I asked as I looked over the back window at the traffic hurdling through the mist. “Why the fuck didn’t she listen?” Tara whispered, hands still fixed to the wheel. “She could have stopped. Why didn’t she fucking stop?” She gripped the steering with all her might. I just closed my eyes. Tara’s pain was exploding while my guilt was eating away at me. Stephanie may have been Tara’s college roommate and best friend, but three years ago Stephanie and I developed a closer relationship. *********** Tara was in Montreal for a conference when Stephanie built up enough courage to make her move. For years it was obvious that Stephanie had a crush on me. She’d always deny it, but Tara and I knew that she was infatuated with me. It was a joke for five years. And then it wasn’t a joke. From practically the beginning of our relationship Tara and I weren’t on the same page sexually. We were more than in love, but Tara grew less and less interested in sex as her career took off. My dick was a minor distraction in her world and she had no trouble telling me. “Please take care of that elsewhere,” she’d tell me, but I didn’t think that was what she really wanted. Every other week or month she’d apologize and we’d fumble through an intimate act that only frustrated both of us. We were making it work, somehow. The rest of our relationship was actually amazing, but the tension around our sex life made for some terrible fights. Truth be told, I found her career and personality both too intimidating and important to bother with my petty needs. One particular week she practically laughed at my needs. “If your dick was in that much need,” she sneered, “you’d have bent me over and simply fucked me.” That was her special kiss goodbye as she got into the limousine on her way to yet another speaking engagement in Paris. Humiliated and emasculated, I spent the better part of the week buried in work. I hit the gym at 6AM, at the office by 8AM and didn’t get home until 10PM. Tara’s apology texts went unanswered as I feared her return Saturday morning. When I pulled into the garage Friday evening, I found Stephanie’s car in the third section of the three car garage. I could hear the vacuum cleaner in the family room, but I chose to keep to the kitchen. As I made myself a sandwich I heard the vacuum turn off and the worst version of Sade’s ‘Smooth Operator’ take it’s place. Stephanie obviously had her headphones on and hadn’t realized anyone else was in the house. As she danced into the family room, I was greeted by a Raiders t-shirt and an orange thong that was not quite the typical maid’s uniform. Tara and Stephanie were best friends in the same way that Tara and I were married. Tara made the rules and Stephanie willingly followed. From job choices to boyfriend breakups, Stephanie was dependent on Tara’s advice. Their relationship was so close that I wondered if Tara’s lack of sexual interest in me was related to her connection with Stephanie. Of course I didn’t have the courage to ask Tara so I brought it up to Stephanie. “Not our thing,” Stephanie simply denied. I was kind of hoping it was, but that was the last of that conversation. “Oh, Jesus!” Stephanie screamed as she finally realized I was behind the island watching her one woman show. “Why didn’t you tell me that you were home, asshole?” she shouted as she caught her breath and fell to the couch. “Didn’t think I had to announce myself in my own house,” I replied. I tried to focus on my turkey on whole wheat, but my dick was captivated by what that orange thong was trying unsuccessfully to contain. “Tara asked me to straighten up the house before you she got home because she said you were MIA,” Stephanie explained as she tried to wiggle her thighs into her t-shirt. “Where have you been?” she questioned accusingly. “Working,” I answered flatly. “Working so hard you can’t text your wife?” Stephanie barked back. “At least I can wear pants,” I snickered in return. “Shut up!” Stephanie laughed. “They’re in your wash,” she said as she bounced up from the couch and scuttled up to the island so I couldn’t see below her waist. “Barbecue stain,” she sighed. “I bet,” I continued to snicker. Stephanie was an amazingly beautiful woman, but she never felt comfortable about her shapely curves. She hit the gym constantly to keep fit but no amount CrossFit could contain what God bestowed upon her. In contrast, Tara could eat anything and stay supermodel thin. “Fuck you,” Stephanie laughed. My not-so-subtle jab at her weight was clearly a reminder of what Tara had been punching since they were freshmen in college. “At least you’ll have something new to think about when you’re jacking off tomorrow night!” “Why don’t you give me a little show to remember?” I pushed back. “I don’t get that much eye candy around here.” Stephanie stepped back from the granite island with a stubborn defiance. Her muscular frame held up her round dimensions and my eyes recorded every inch. “Is this what you’d like to see?” Stephanie softly spoke, her typically high pitched voice turning sultry. In that moment the joke was over. We were no longer mimicking Tara’s cruel treatment of our faults. We were two adults alone with a clear need for a connection. A connection that involved positive vibes. “You know that your body is what Tara wishes she had,” I said I stared with an appreciation and sincerity typically reserved for exquisite works of beautiful art. “I don’t think I care what Tara wants right now,” Stephanie responded as she shyly pulled her black & silver t-shirt over her head. Her near naked body was something I’d imagined for years as a simple curiosity. As she walked toward the kitchen I forgot about all of the mean jokes we’d told each other over the years. Those jokes that amplified Tara’s dominance of us were what kept us from noticing each other. Those jokes kept my dick from throbbing in Stephanie’s majestic presence. But Stephanie traded those shallow swipes at my dignity for a validation of her womanly beauty. There were no more mean words in Stephanie’s mouth that evening. Just my dick. ********* “You’re driving isn’t that much better,” Tara sneered as I turned our SUV into our serene neighborhood. I slowed the truck as I navigated the puddles before turning into our driveway. While I waited for the garage door to open, Tara unbuckled her seat belt and got out of the truck in the pouring rain. She couldn’t spend another second in my presence and she needed to cool off. A week ago she watched her best friend fall 1000 feet and she hadn’t said a word about it. I didn’t know what to do. So I sat in the truck. In the rain. In the driveway. With the garage door up. ********* For two years Stephanie and I took quiet advantage of Tara’s frequent business trips. Our foreplay consisted of mean-spirited daggers at our personal insecurities in Tara’s presence and then radio silence until the last day of Tara’s trip. The tension of openly sparring in front of Tara and potentially getting busted made for an amazing two years of happiness. Even Tara seemed content knowing her two closest people were twistedly enjoying each other’s company and I was a lot less horny when she got home. Of course I faked it a little, but I was less cranky when her answer to my requests was 'handle it yourself, pervert’. Then, as expected, everything changed. For two years Stephanie and I had kept our encounters playful. Oral and handjob were the menu’s only choices. We were naughty but the thrill was easy and freeing. My face between her thighs or her hands in my boxers were therapeutic releases. No condoms or lube or preparation. What was clearly planned had the feeling of spontaneity. We had a secret instead of an affair. We were like teenagers full of nervous energy and bound hormones. Unfortunately that playfulness ended when Stephanie showed up at our house one day into Tara’s weeklong trip to Sydney. I was working on my laptop on the back porch when I heard the garage door open. I was in my boxers because it was a warm evening and our backyard faced the dense woods. As I kept working an hour passed and I assumed that Stephanie was just in the neighborhood and needed a place to crash. She was the only other person with a key to our house. Maybe she was watching TV and enjoying a free meal. As the sun dropped into the crowd of trees behind our house, I heard the patio door slide open. Before I saw Stephanie’s naked body I smelled the wine. I was thoroughly confused. Without a word or eye contact she took me by the hand and led me to the couch placed in the middle of the deck. There was no witty banter or laughter on her lips - just a tinge of red wine. This was heavy because I realized my face had never been this close to hers. While her hands were clearly wrapped around my growing dick, her mouth was someplace new - my neck. Soft kisses were piling onto my clavicle as I questioned where to put my hands. They’d only ever been in her afro, in her pussy or on her breasts. But they remained to my side because the only obvious choice was wrapped around her waist as she began to straddle me. This was no longer playful. This was intimacy. She never kissed my lips but I knew what was next. The taste of the red wine couldn’t mask the sense of passion that accompanied her wet kiss. I could feel her easing my growing dick into her warm pussy, but I was too engulfed in her quiet kiss to really notice. I sat like a statue trying not to place my hands on her waist as her teeth gently bit my upper lip. As Stephanie rested her hands on my shoulders I realized that she no longer saw me as a fun release but rather a partner in joy. Her hips barely moved but I could feel her pussy squeezing my dick with gentle hugs. And with each passing minute, the hugs got tighter and the pressure of her biting intensified. For two years we laughed at the guttural moans we shared under each other’s stimulation, but this was thunderously silent. As her thighs tightened around my waist I fought the urge to wrap my hands around her waist the way the dark sky clinched our scene. A slow tremble melted over my nervous dick as her legs shivered and her nipples pierced my chest. The exaggerated writhing of her hips and boisterous swearing of her mouth that accompanied my tongue between her legs had been replaced by a blissful silence that brought focus to the rhythmic contraction of her pussy that slowly drew the life out of me. And lastly I could feel her nails gracefully trace into my back shoulders with the precision of a caligrapher’s pen. The sting I felt from those intense scratches as the humid air rested within the shallow wound woke me from my trance. We had shared more than 100 moments of cum soaked laughter over the previous 700 days, but our math was inverted that warm evening. And before I could make rhyme or reason of our situation, she had exited as quietly as she entered. I could have held her there to stay. But in truth I never held her. ************ I finally entered our house with the sole intent of taking care of my wife in her time of need. My steps were calculated and my breath was deliberate. I knew she was cold and wet in the living room, but I stopped in the kitchen to make her favorite tea. The house could feel the unbalance as Tara was losing control and I was looking to steady the ship. “She wasn’t supposed to…” Tara tearfully started as I placed her Brazilian tea on the table in front of her crossed legs. I patiently waited for her to finish her thought because in the last week she only spoke in cold facts about how she’d lost her best friend. She was being her usual strong and controlling self around friends and family, but from the time we left the cemetery I could feel her beginning to unravel. Then Tara broke down in sobbing tears. I was as frozen as I was when Stephanie decided to join me on the back patio a year prior. I clearly sucked at these situations, but I had to be better this go round. After that evening on the back patio, Stephanie and I never connected again. We only saw each other in the presence of Tara. Our time alone during Tara’s trips were never discussed. Even our ongoing jabs that acted as foreplay in front Tara ceased. We had nothing. “She couldn’t stay on the fucking path!” Tara grunted as she reached for her tea. “I told her ass to stay focused, but she didn’t listen. Stupid girl!” I’d heard her explain the accident 20 times over that last week. To the police. To Stephanie’s parents. To everyone. I could retell every moment as if I’d been there. In vivid detail I could describe beautiful morning air that sung with spring lyrics. I knew the dewy green grass that lined the path below the three evergreen trees. I could see the spokes cave as Stephanie’s tire hit a patch of rocks scattered on the right edge of the path. I could hear Stephanie’s nervous laughter shift to frightened swearing as she lost control of her front wheel near the sharp turn at the bottom of the path along the hill. I felt the momentum that carried Stephanie over the edge of the rocky terrain. I could identify every thorny shrub that scarred Tara’s legs as she climbed down the hill to find the remains of her closest friend. I could hear Tara dialing 911 while she held Stephanie in her arms as the sun glowed bright. Tara needed a 911 call now. For herself. I could see the hurt in her eyes, so I kissed her on her forehead and ran upstairs to run her a warm bath. Warm tea and warm bath were the best answers I could think of to drown her tears. As I ran the water and took off my tie I could feel her presence enter our bathroom. She’d heard the water and disrobed. Inside I might have been confused as to what to do, but on the outside I was becoming her rock. “I don’t deserve you,” Tara spoke softly as she walked up to me. I gently placed my hands upon her waists. With a slow focus she helped me removed my clothes until we both stood naked under the sunlight that began to break through the clouds outside of our window. Her thin brown frame then began to lean into my chest as she steadied herself with my arms. Only one part of my body was prepared for her eventual position as my eyes fixated on her ass moving further from me as her mouth wrapped itself onto my dick. She sucked me with an intensity that was as pointed as her neglect had been awash in our marriage. I found myself frozen again, but this time I held on to my instigator with a love that felt rewarded for enduring the unrequited passion that coated my every inch. And in an instant I released every ounce of love that I had on reserve into Tara’s welcoming mouth. As I slowly regained my composure, she led me to the tub. We carefully climbed in and I sat behind her while she sank into my chest. The hot water cooled to the perfect temperature. For ten minutes we sat in silence until I asked if she was “going to be okay?” Tara arched her head backward toward me and grabbed my hand, gently resting my palm against her neck. I could still feel the tears falling onto my wrists when I felt her tense up. Then with a subtle nod I could feel her swallow. Swallow me. As my brain processed her actions I couldn’t control my smile. And I could feel her smile as well. Relaxed. Then with a ballerina’s deft Tara stood up and turned toward me. The warm water trickled down from her hardened nipples onto my bald head. She then threw her legs over my shoulders and leaned back. Her hands gripped the sides of the tub while her pussy began to grind the smile off of my face. With my tongue I wrote 'I love you’ over and over. Her hips thrashed as her ass splashed heaps of water onto our bathroom floor. I gripped Tara’s waists like I planned to hold her there until the end of time. I wasn’t going to ever let go. Her wet pussy was engorged and she began to convulse as though she was about to cum. Tara released her death grip from the tub and leaned on my knees while her pelvis worked her pussy onto my face. Worried that she might fall I reached behind me and gripped her ankles to anchor the intense whipping her pussy was dishing out. “Oh fuck!” Tara shouted as I tightened my grip on her ankles. I could feel the scars from the shrubs. Most of the scabs had fallen away, but I could feel the patterns. “Fuck!!” Tara shouted as her thighs nearly squeezed the life out of me. She was fucking my face with too much enthusiasm to realize my mind was now focused on the scratches on her legs. The deep scratches on her legs that felt as though they were written by a skilled caligrapher. As though the signature included the pain of an unrequited love. “Fuck!!” Tara gasped as she held one last squeeze against my face. As her ass sank into the water and she collapsed onto my legs, she saw the look of understanding in my eyes. “Stupid girl,” Tara snarled at me as she closed her eyes to hold back the tears or to enjoy the afterglow. “I told her to stay on the path.”

[anothergirlrecovering]

Lynn 83

I got to therapy and Lynn invited me in. I sat down on her couch and she asked how I’m doing. I said good and ask how she was and she said good and then she asked how my week has been and then she paused and said wait you went away right? And I said yeah I was on vacation and she was like wait but where did you go again and I said where we went and she was like what and I said we went with my mother-in-law and she was like that’s right I knew there was something about this trip and I was like yeah. So I told her that the trip was pretty good and I explained how my husband’s grandma got really morbid and depressing talking about how she can’t wait to die and how his aunt ended up crying at the breakfast table about it and why that would be triggering to her given what happened when her dad lost his independence and how their brother doesn’t talk to them anymore after his desk because he got mad about the estate and I said how my mother-in-law lost her brother by drowning in the river and how we went to the river and we went to the grave and how all of it was kind of sad and also kind of awkward because I feel like I’m not really a part of the family where I should be privileged enough to even be in those places with them but at the same time I guess I am family and I said how my husband actually cried at the grave and I was surprised by that and Lynn was like why and I was like I’m not really sure but he said the dates really got to him because her brother was only 13 at the time and I explain how my mother-in-law ended up moving where she is now because of it. I explained about how my mother-in-law‘s brother stopped talking to all of them after their dad died and about how my husband and I argued some on the trip and I feel like not that we argue because my mother-in-law was there as much as it was that one of us would say something that would upset one of us but since she was there we couldn’t really discuss it in the moment and so feelings with faster and we would have to wait a while to actually talk through it because we didn’t really have our own space. I said that we were both pretty good when we went bike riding alone and how things seem to be a lot better at the end when we had more space. She said how some of my husbands anxiety made sense given what happened to his moms brother and she said how her grandparent or someone told hers story of someone dying in a sled accident and she was like sobwhat does a kid do and I was like they get anxious about sleds and she was like yeah and every time my kids sled I’m there freaking out telling them to be safe. I said it was weird how his aunt and uncle seemed very abrupt and not really seeing us and I don’t know. I told her about my husband and my fight and I didn’t really go into a ton of details and I said that I realized how interesting it is that you know in the last two years things have kind of switch, or however long I’ve been seeing Lynn but I don’t freak out in fights and run away anymore it’s actually my husband who leaves the conversation gets overwhelmed and she was like yeah I remember that and I was like yeah like we were fighting and he walked away and it was like where I was the one having to be like no let’s finish this conversation. She was like what is it with guys in that age group and she laughed and said that she has a lot of clients who are around my age who have boyfriends or husbands who are having the similar kinds of outbursts and she was like it’s childish but I don’t get what it is and she was like you’ll have to think about it more with your therapist brain and she said how her son is 18 and he has a few of those moments but he’s mostly grown out of a lot of it and she doesn’t understand what is happening with so many 20 something-year-old man LOL. I was like honestly I don’t know but in his case I could always say lots of untreated trauma and lack of positive parenting from when he was little because I don’t think either one of us room really taught how to calm down or Cope or express ourselves in healthy ways. Honestly, Amber called me at this point in writing, and we talked for two hours so the details are pretty limited. I told her about my mom making that controlling kind of deal with she laughed and was like so the gift is 4500 and I was like pretty much and we talked about how typical it was for my mom to do something controlling like that and how my husband wants to just not even take the money at all. I said I was not about to get up $4500 and she was like well you could put the $4500 in savings and if they do try to do anything with leveraging it later on you could always write them the check and send it back and I was like absolutely not I’m using it and I have proof that it was a gift on paper so absolute worst case scenario if they do leverage it and it gets to that point I will remind them that I have the paper that says it was gift and if they feel otherwise then I will cut them off because I’ve done it once before and that’s the reason that we have the they are in allowed to call me roll. She said that sounded like a plan I said my husband said he would try to trust that I would stand up for us if they did try to leverage that gift as a way to manipulate us in the future. I said so basically that was my week and the only other thing was a mishap with a friend and I talk to her about it and was kind of like at this point I don’t know how long either one of us can go with being petty but I explained the situation and she was like well basically it sounds like you’ve outgrown this friend and she started talking about how a lot of times we know when people start EMDR they start to get better and theyre friendships and relationships all start to change And sometimes that means outgrowing people. I started to cry and I said that I’m tired of outgrowing my friends and I’m tired of my friends going to treatment and feeling like we are always in different places and I’m always losing people that I love and care about. She essentially said that I was not being petty and that I had perfectly good reason to be upset and she said she thought that it actually had nothing to do with me at all and we talked about reasons it may have had nothing to do with me. My lips started to quiver and I started to for real crying and I said I’ve never said this out loud but I just feel so lonely. I said how I know it’s never too late to make friends but at the same time there’s a part of me that feels like I spent so much time being so sick that it’s almost like I missed this critical period of development and learning how to even connect with people and now I’m scrambling to make friends and figure it out and it’s like I feel like I often overcompensate and try to be super funny and I end up making people laugh but I don’t feel genuine and it feels very forced and exhausting because I’m always so anxious and my social anxiety just feels awful and I end up feeling like I’m awkward and weird and different and no one will like me and there something wrong with me . She kept doing the whole I mean you could go down that path or you can’t but we both know that where that leads and I was like thanks Len we both know it leads to self deprecation and she was like and self sabotage and self-destruction and I was like but it’s just so hard because my social anxiety is so significant and I go into everything feeling like it’s going to be a lose lose scenario because there is something wrong with me and I said how my husband and I went to a wedding recently and I was with our old sorority and fraternity people and basically that I had told my husband that I was feeling super anxious about it and was worried that they think I’m weird and he had basically said it’s going to be a self for filling prophecy where if I go into it thinking those things I’m going to act that way and I was like it’s not like he’s entirely wrong it just sucks because that really is how I feel. She was like you just need to find somebody that you have a genuine connection with and I was like OK but where the hell do I find these people and she was like anywhere and I was like what the heck I literally don’t know you’re talking about and she was like sometimes it happens when you aren’t expecting it and she was like even at conferences and I was like I mean I love Britney but she lives in Atlanta and she was like well yeah they aren’t all going to live right by you and I was like well what the heck I’m trying to make friends so I can hang out with and she brought up that she is friends with that lady from the conference Who she met who is currently in Venezuela and she is thinking about going to visit her and I was like in Venezuela and she was like no she’s just on a business trip there but she said she might present a workshop there and she asked me if I would join her and I was like well that’s pretty cool and she was like yeah so sometimes you just never know and I was like I mean yeah and she was like and you need to connect with other therapists and I was like no they’re weird and she made a face and I was like I mean you’re not weird but a lot of them are weird and she was like OK I’ll give you that that there are a lot of weird ones but there are also a lot of really nice one and I was like yeah but they are different than the general public and you know that and it’s like when I get together with all my therapist friends it’s nice and all but it’s definitely different and feelings focused and a lot of venting about our jobs and it’s like yes I need that kind of connection but it’s not the same as a regular friend. She was like obviously you know how to connect people because you are a therapist and you wouldn’t be having a full caseload if you weren’t going to connecting with people and I was like I mean I’ve learned what to say and what not to say and she was like no you can’t fake that kind of connection with people and I was like what the heck yes you can and she was like no you can’t remember your last therapist who didn’t like it I was like that’s because she sucked and you don’t and she was like well but you didn’t have a connection with her and I was like no I did not but and she was like you know how to connect and I was like also though I’ve learned certain things that I should say and she pointed out that people like us are the type of people that people end up drawing to us which I just kind of sat and listened while tearing up and sat there thinking about how I don’t want to be friends with people just to be there listening ear because they don’t have a therapist and they want to use me as their therapist but she’s talking about how people are naturally drawn to us and how basically it’s OK to use that skill set of making people laugh as a way to connect and make friends and she said how people at church are my friends and I was like yeah but literally that goes back to that whole negative believe I only matter if I’m sick because they only even know me and care about me because have a problem and she was like well they have a problem too which is why they are in the group two and I was like yeah but at some point I’m going to end up outgrowing them to you or they will outgrow me and then that will be painful to you I’m just tired of outgrowing everyone wore them out growing me and getting hurt and feeling lonely and It feels like if I didn’t have a problem stop going to the group no one would really give a shit anymore and that would be that and then I started crying more and I was like it just feels like if I were to disappear it wouldn’t even matter and I was like and I’m not suicidal and I could play dear Evan Hansen songs in my car million times to cope with it but I just genuinely feels like it wouldn’t matter if I was here or not. It was just all very sad. Lots of crying and lots of feeling like a total fucking loser with no friends and complete embarrassment. I didn’t say a lot and she said how it gets easier the older you get and it did for her especially when you have kids. She said it seems strange but when you have kids you crave those friendships even more and j was like yea because kids and babies don’t talk back and she said yeah. Lynn asked when we close on our house and I said July 20th. She was like wow that’s so soon and I was like yeah as she was like have you been shopping and I was like no lol and she was like well you don’t have much time and i said we are throwing away most of our stuff and buying new furniture because we had gotten married right after I graduated and kept all of our non matching cheap stuff and figured it made more sense to wait on a home to buy all new things which she agreed. She said maybe next time we could do that parts work activity for my social anxiety and identify where my anxious parts come from and she said it’s great for creative people and I was like I’m not exactly creative but sure ajdbshe said maybe creative isn’t the right word but I can’t remember the word she used instead and I said okay. We agreed to do that and I paid scheduled and headed out.

[jimdsmith34]

I’m Starting The Cameran Eubanks Is Over Party

Last week onwas the hunting trip and I hope the group has all recovered from their hangovers. I know I am still feeling yesterdays shenanigans, for one. #NeverDrinkingOnASundayAgain #UntilNextSunday

Kathryn calls Whitney to catch up or get coffee. I hope she doesnt hold her breath waiting for that call to get returned. Or did we watch different season threes?

I really did not need this gratuitous scene of Thomas driving around Charleston telling Kenzie about all the buildings his family owns. Like, we get it. Youre rich and powerful.

Naomie and Craig go to a couples therapist. The therapist looks like one of those cool dad types who wears Hawaiian shirts in his off time and says things like “I’m down. I’m hip. Right, guys?”

Craig: Im not saying that Naomie shouldnt question me ever because shes my girlfriend, Im saying she shouldnt be my girlfriend unless shes willing to have a blind and unwavering devotion to everything I say and do.

That’s not alarming at all…

Honestly, Im kind of with Craig on the whole being from the North is not yelling thing, though.

Craigs denying that he called Naomie a moron. This is truly some Donald Trump level of denial. WE HAVE YOU ON TAPE. Can we roll the playback, please? Craig, welcome to your tape.

Landon show sup to some bar and orders herself a shot and a beer. Respect, honestly.

Landons wearing a flannel because shes trying to attract more lumbersexuals. Where they at in Charleston, though? Also, girl, you have a boyfriend AND another older guy you’re trying to seduce. It’s enough.

Austen asks Landon about Drew who is apparently asking Landon if she loves him. Poor guy, he has no idea whats in store for him.

Landon says shes ready to settle down again because her dog is getting old, basically. Sure, thats as good a reason as any.

Shep walks in and says Where theres smoke theres fire, and Landon and Austen are looking very amorous. Cant you just say they look cozy like a normal fucking person? Also, no they do not look amorous. They look like two people having a normal conversation. Just because you use big words doesn’t mean you’re automatically right.

Drink again because Shep described Chelsea as laissez-faire. Just call her laid back, dude. Shes a person, not an economic theory of capitalism. He also thinks that he should be dating Chelsea because they both DGAF but you cant have two people in a relationship who DGAF; thats just a recipe for disaster. SOMEBODY has to give a fuck.

Thomas visits his dad whos approximately 800 years old. He seems to work for the Museum of the Confederacy

Me:

Thomas dad is like back in the good ol days you could get a hot dog for a nickel and a slave for a dime! Those were the days.

Im sorry but Thomass dad needs his own subtitles because I cannot understand this man for shit. He asks his dad for advice and his dads like Buy low, sell high. Thanks, dad, Why didn’t you just tell him plastics? That would have been just as helpful.

Austen and Chelsea are in some American Ninja Warrior wet dream/obstacle course situation. This looks like a bad date youd see in . NEXT!

Theyre betting each other for kisses like this is fucking middle school.

Oh wow, Austen had an older sister who passed away in an accident. Thats terrible. A moment of silence. This shit is sad.

Austens sisters name was Kyle and Chelsea is like OMG Kyle? Thats my brothers name! Bitch, this is not about you.

Patricias got some bougie-ass friend visiting her who literally specifies what type of glass she wants her vodka tonic in. Come on, this is a vodka tonic, not some expensive wine. Its gonna taste the same regardless of the type of stem on the glass.

Patricia is throwing an Indian themed party to celebrate her lily white friend.

Me:

Kathryn goes into Chelseas salon for a hair cut. I smell a set-up.

Kathryn: Shep told me you were a great stylist, aka the producers are making me come here.

Kathryn: Money doesnt grow on trees spoken by the lady whos trying out modeling instead of getting a real job to support her two infant children.

JD goes over to Thomas house (or office, I cant tell, fuck it) and Thomas is like I heard Kathryn and Elizabeth are hanging out. Like, no shit, they are friends? Thomas brings up Kathryns letter and this shit is long. Like 18 pages front and back long. I’m not recapping the contents of the letter because I fell asleep.

Kathryn: If I were to see Thomas Id just want to give him a big hug.

Ive never heard that synonym for punch to the face before.

Kathryn: Thats the thing with Thomas. Hes such an asshole but hes a good person.

Me trying to figure out how that makes any sense at all:

Patricia and her friend are wearing matching dog caftans. I have no comment. I mean, my grandma (may she rest in peace) used to wear 90s windbreaker tracksuit outfits well into the 2000s, so we all have our things.

Craig and Naomie are getting ready for the party and Craig is like Therapy was great, clearly the lesson we learned was please be nice to me tonight and dont treat me like shit. Real productive session.

Landon shows up to this party alone, so I guess Drew or whatever his name is is officially over.

Patricia is explaining how to eat curry, i.e. you take the rice and you put the curry on top of the rice. Cameron says Oh snap! What, putting shit on top of rice is too much for you to handle, Cam?

Cameran would be sucking up to this lady for not letting people curse at the dinner table. Bitch, please. You asked Shep last week of Chelsea gave him a hard-on. Just because you used the word “weiner” instead of “dick” doesn’t make you a saint. Please drop the Holier Than Thou act.

Patricia brings an Indian healer aka a lady whos gonna bring everyone up into the hot seat and make unfounded speculations about each of them. Can’t wait:

SHEP HAS NO CHILL. Craig goes up there and hes like Will Craig ever admit law isnt his true passion?

Healer lady: No, because law is his true passion.

Boom, roasted by the Indian healer!

Craig asks the healer about his connection with Naomie and the healer calls them soulmates. Naomies face is like fuck you, fuck you fuck you. This is her facial expression:

Kind of an odd reaction to hearing you and your current boyfriend are going to be together forever.

I wonder how much the producers paid this Indian healer to tell Landon that she has a soulmate in this room.

Whitney is bringing up Kathryns sobriety to the healer, aka a woman who doesn’t even know Kathryn, which seems highly inappropriate. What wont these producers do for ratings?

Craig: As a completely objective third party with no personal interest in the matter, I think what Kathryns doing is fine and she should be allowed to apologize.

Cam: Im sick of this, stay out of it!

^Says the woman whos constantly all up in everybodys business.

Honestly, this high society lady getting morally offended by the word fuck needs to fuck off. Come the fuck on, bitch, You were alive when abortions werent legal and youre gonna act like you cant stand hearing the word fuck? One more time because I’m petty: FUCK!!!!

Im truly over Cameran. Im starting the Cameran is over party. Tryna talk about We need to stay out of Thomas and Kathryns business when she stirs up everybodys business. Girl, bye. 

source http://allofbeer.com/2017/07/19/im-starting-the-cameran-eubanks-is-over-party/ from All of Beer http://allofbeer.blogspot.com/2017/07/im-starting-cameran-eubanks-is-over.html

[samanthasroberts]

I’m Starting The Cameran Eubanks Is Over Party

Last week onwas the hunting trip and I hope the group has all recovered from their hangovers. I know I am still feeling yesterdays shenanigans, for one. #NeverDrinkingOnASundayAgain #UntilNextSunday

Kathryn calls Whitney to catch up or get coffee. I hope she doesnt hold her breath waiting for that call to get returned. Or did we watch different season threes?

I really did not need this gratuitous scene of Thomas driving around Charleston telling Kenzie about all the buildings his family owns. Like, we get it. Youre rich and powerful.

Naomie and Craig go to a couples therapist. The therapist looks like one of those cool dad types who wears Hawaiian shirts in his off time and says things like “I’m down. I’m hip. Right, guys?”

Craig: Im not saying that Naomie shouldnt question me ever because shes my girlfriend, Im saying she shouldnt be my girlfriend unless shes willing to have a blind and unwavering devotion to everything I say and do.

That’s not alarming at all…

Honestly, Im kind of with Craig on the whole being from the North is not yelling thing, though.

Craigs denying that he called Naomie a moron. This is truly some Donald Trump level of denial. WE HAVE YOU ON TAPE. Can we roll the playback, please? Craig, welcome to your tape.

Landon show sup to some bar and orders herself a shot and a beer. Respect, honestly.

Landons wearing a flannel because shes trying to attract more lumbersexuals. Where they at in Charleston, though? Also, girl, you have a boyfriend AND another older guy you’re trying to seduce. It’s enough.

Austen asks Landon about Drew who is apparently asking Landon if she loves him. Poor guy, he has no idea whats in store for him.

Landon says shes ready to settle down again because her dog is getting old, basically. Sure, thats as good a reason as any.

Shep walks in and says Where theres smoke theres fire, and Landon and Austen are looking very amorous. Cant you just say they look cozy like a normal fucking person? Also, no they do not look amorous. They look like two people having a normal conversation. Just because you use big words doesn’t mean you’re automatically right.

Drink again because Shep described Chelsea as laissez-faire. Just call her laid back, dude. Shes a person, not an economic theory of capitalism. He also thinks that he should be dating Chelsea because they both DGAF but you cant have two people in a relationship who DGAF; thats just a recipe for disaster. SOMEBODY has to give a fuck.

Thomas visits his dad whos approximately 800 years old. He seems to work for the Museum of the Confederacy

Me:

Thomas dad is like back in the good ol days you could get a hot dog for a nickel and a slave for a dime! Those were the days.

Im sorry but Thomass dad needs his own subtitles because I cannot understand this man for shit. He asks his dad for advice and his dads like Buy low, sell high. Thanks, dad, Why didn’t you just tell him plastics? That would have been just as helpful.

Austen and Chelsea are in some American Ninja Warrior wet dream/obstacle course situation. This looks like a bad date youd see in . NEXT!

Theyre betting each other for kisses like this is fucking middle school.

Oh wow, Austen had an older sister who passed away in an accident. Thats terrible. A moment of silence. This shit is sad.

Austens sisters name was Kyle and Chelsea is like OMG Kyle? Thats my brothers name! Bitch, this is not about you.

Patricias got some bougie-ass friend visiting her who literally specifies what type of glass she wants her vodka tonic in. Come on, this is a vodka tonic, not some expensive wine. Its gonna taste the same regardless of the type of stem on the glass.

Patricia is throwing an Indian themed party to celebrate her lily white friend.

Me:

Kathryn goes into Chelseas salon for a hair cut. I smell a set-up.

Kathryn: Shep told me you were a great stylist, aka the producers are making me come here.

Kathryn: Money doesnt grow on trees spoken by the lady whos trying out modeling instead of getting a real job to support her two infant children.

JD goes over to Thomas house (or office, I cant tell, fuck it) and Thomas is like I heard Kathryn and Elizabeth are hanging out. Like, no shit, they are friends? Thomas brings up Kathryns letter and this shit is long. Like 18 pages front and back long. I’m not recapping the contents of the letter because I fell asleep.

Kathryn: If I were to see Thomas Id just want to give him a big hug.

Ive never heard that synonym for punch to the face before.

Kathryn: Thats the thing with Thomas. Hes such an asshole but hes a good person.

Me trying to figure out how that makes any sense at all:

Patricia and her friend are wearing matching dog caftans. I have no comment. I mean, my grandma (may she rest in peace) used to wear 90s windbreaker tracksuit outfits well into the 2000s, so we all have our things.

Craig and Naomie are getting ready for the party and Craig is like Therapy was great, clearly the lesson we learned was please be nice to me tonight and dont treat me like shit. Real productive session.

Landon shows up to this party alone, so I guess Drew or whatever his name is is officially over.

Patricia is explaining how to eat curry, i.e. you take the rice and you put the curry on top of the rice. Cameron says Oh snap! What, putting shit on top of rice is too much for you to handle, Cam?

Cameran would be sucking up to this lady for not letting people curse at the dinner table. Bitch, please. You asked Shep last week of Chelsea gave him a hard-on. Just because you used the word “weiner” instead of “dick” doesn’t make you a saint. Please drop the Holier Than Thou act.

Patricia brings an Indian healer aka a lady whos gonna bring everyone up into the hot seat and make unfounded speculations about each of them. Can’t wait:

SHEP HAS NO CHILL. Craig goes up there and hes like Will Craig ever admit law isnt his true passion?

Healer lady: No, because law is his true passion.

Boom, roasted by the Indian healer!

Craig asks the healer about his connection with Naomie and the healer calls them soulmates. Naomies face is like fuck you, fuck you fuck you. This is her facial expression:

Kind of an odd reaction to hearing you and your current boyfriend are going to be together forever.

I wonder how much the producers paid this Indian healer to tell Landon that she has a soulmate in this room.

Whitney is bringing up Kathryns sobriety to the healer, aka a woman who doesn’t even know Kathryn, which seems highly inappropriate. What wont these producers do for ratings?

Craig: As a completely objective third party with no personal interest in the matter, I think what Kathryns doing is fine and she should be allowed to apologize.

Cam: Im sick of this, stay out of it!

^Says the woman whos constantly all up in everybodys business.

Honestly, this high society lady getting morally offended by the word fuck needs to fuck off. Come the fuck on, bitch, You were alive when abortions werent legal and youre gonna act like you cant stand hearing the word fuck? One more time because I’m petty: FUCK!!!!

Im truly over Cameran. Im starting the Cameran is over party. Tryna talk about We need to stay out of Thomas and Kathryns business when she stirs up everybodys business. Girl, bye. 

Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/07/19/im-starting-the-cameran-eubanks-is-over-party/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/07/19/im-starting-the-cameran-eubanks-is-over-party/

[adambstingus]

I’m Starting The Cameran Eubanks Is Over Party

Last week onwas the hunting trip and I hope the group has all recovered from their hangovers. I know I am still feeling yesterdays shenanigans, for one. #NeverDrinkingOnASundayAgain #UntilNextSunday

Kathryn calls Whitney to catch up or get coffee. I hope she doesnt hold her breath waiting for that call to get returned. Or did we watch different season threes?

I really did not need this gratuitous scene of Thomas driving around Charleston telling Kenzie about all the buildings his family owns. Like, we get it. Youre rich and powerful.

Naomie and Craig go to a couples therapist. The therapist looks like one of those cool dad types who wears Hawaiian shirts in his off time and says things like “I’m down. I’m hip. Right, guys?”

Craig: Im not saying that Naomie shouldnt question me ever because shes my girlfriend, Im saying she shouldnt be my girlfriend unless shes willing to have a blind and unwavering devotion to everything I say and do.

That’s not alarming at all…

Honestly, Im kind of with Craig on the whole being from the North is not yelling thing, though.

Craigs denying that he called Naomie a moron. This is truly some Donald Trump level of denial. WE HAVE YOU ON TAPE. Can we roll the playback, please? Craig, welcome to your tape.

Landon show sup to some bar and orders herself a shot and a beer. Respect, honestly.

Landons wearing a flannel because shes trying to attract more lumbersexuals. Where they at in Charleston, though? Also, girl, you have a boyfriend AND another older guy you’re trying to seduce. It’s enough.

Austen asks Landon about Drew who is apparently asking Landon if she loves him. Poor guy, he has no idea whats in store for him.

Landon says shes ready to settle down again because her dog is getting old, basically. Sure, thats as good a reason as any.

Shep walks in and says Where theres smoke theres fire, and Landon and Austen are looking very amorous. Cant you just say they look cozy like a normal fucking person? Also, no they do not look amorous. They look like two people having a normal conversation. Just because you use big words doesn’t mean you’re automatically right.

Drink again because Shep described Chelsea as laissez-faire. Just call her laid back, dude. Shes a person, not an economic theory of capitalism. He also thinks that he should be dating Chelsea because they both DGAF but you cant have two people in a relationship who DGAF; thats just a recipe for disaster. SOMEBODY has to give a fuck.

Thomas visits his dad whos approximately 800 years old. He seems to work for the Museum of the Confederacy

Me:

Thomas dad is like back in the good ol days you could get a hot dog for a nickel and a slave for a dime! Those were the days.

Im sorry but Thomass dad needs his own subtitles because I cannot understand this man for shit. He asks his dad for advice and his dads like Buy low, sell high. Thanks, dad, Why didn’t you just tell him plastics? That would have been just as helpful.

Austen and Chelsea are in some American Ninja Warrior wet dream/obstacle course situation. This looks like a bad date youd see in . NEXT!

Theyre betting each other for kisses like this is fucking middle school.

Oh wow, Austen had an older sister who passed away in an accident. Thats terrible. A moment of silence. This shit is sad.

Austens sisters name was Kyle and Chelsea is like OMG Kyle? Thats my brothers name! Bitch, this is not about you.

Patricias got some bougie-ass friend visiting her who literally specifies what type of glass she wants her vodka tonic in. Come on, this is a vodka tonic, not some expensive wine. Its gonna taste the same regardless of the type of stem on the glass.

Patricia is throwing an Indian themed party to celebrate her lily white friend.

Me:

Kathryn goes into Chelseas salon for a hair cut. I smell a set-up.

Kathryn: Shep told me you were a great stylist, aka the producers are making me come here.

Kathryn: Money doesnt grow on trees spoken by the lady whos trying out modeling instead of getting a real job to support her two infant children.

JD goes over to Thomas house (or office, I cant tell, fuck it) and Thomas is like I heard Kathryn and Elizabeth are hanging out. Like, no shit, they are friends? Thomas brings up Kathryns letter and this shit is long. Like 18 pages front and back long. I’m not recapping the contents of the letter because I fell asleep.

Kathryn: If I were to see Thomas Id just want to give him a big hug.

Ive never heard that synonym for punch to the face before.

Kathryn: Thats the thing with Thomas. Hes such an asshole but hes a good person.

Me trying to figure out how that makes any sense at all:

Patricia and her friend are wearing matching dog caftans. I have no comment. I mean, my grandma (may she rest in peace) used to wear 90s windbreaker tracksuit outfits well into the 2000s, so we all have our things.

Craig and Naomie are getting ready for the party and Craig is like Therapy was great, clearly the lesson we learned was please be nice to me tonight and dont treat me like shit. Real productive session.

Landon shows up to this party alone, so I guess Drew or whatever his name is is officially over.

Patricia is explaining how to eat curry, i.e. you take the rice and you put the curry on top of the rice. Cameron says Oh snap! What, putting shit on top of rice is too much for you to handle, Cam?

Cameran would be sucking up to this lady for not letting people curse at the dinner table. Bitch, please. You asked Shep last week of Chelsea gave him a hard-on. Just because you used the word “weiner” instead of “dick” doesn’t make you a saint. Please drop the Holier Than Thou act.

Patricia brings an Indian healer aka a lady whos gonna bring everyone up into the hot seat and make unfounded speculations about each of them. Can’t wait:

SHEP HAS NO CHILL. Craig goes up there and hes like Will Craig ever admit law isnt his true passion?

Healer lady: No, because law is his true passion.

Boom, roasted by the Indian healer!

Craig asks the healer about his connection with Naomie and the healer calls them soulmates. Naomies face is like fuck you, fuck you fuck you. This is her facial expression:

Kind of an odd reaction to hearing you and your current boyfriend are going to be together forever.

I wonder how much the producers paid this Indian healer to tell Landon that she has a soulmate in this room.

Whitney is bringing up Kathryns sobriety to the healer, aka a woman who doesn’t even know Kathryn, which seems highly inappropriate. What wont these producers do for ratings?

Craig: As a completely objective third party with no personal interest in the matter, I think what Kathryns doing is fine and she should be allowed to apologize.

Cam: Im sick of this, stay out of it!

^Says the woman whos constantly all up in everybodys business.

Honestly, this high society lady getting morally offended by the word fuck needs to fuck off. Come the fuck on, bitch, You were alive when abortions werent legal and youre gonna act like you cant stand hearing the word fuck? One more time because I’m petty: FUCK!!!!

Im truly over Cameran. Im starting the Cameran is over party. Tryna talk about We need to stay out of Thomas and Kathryns business when she stirs up everybodys business. Girl, bye. 

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/07/19/im-starting-the-cameran-eubanks-is-over-party/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/163164270437

[allofbeercom]

I’m Starting The Cameran Eubanks Is Over Party

Last week onwas the hunting trip and I hope the group has all recovered from their hangovers. I know I am still feeling yesterdays shenanigans, for one. #NeverDrinkingOnASundayAgain #UntilNextSunday

Kathryn calls Whitney to catch up or get coffee. I hope she doesnt hold her breath waiting for that call to get returned. Or did we watch different season threes?

I really did not need this gratuitous scene of Thomas driving around Charleston telling Kenzie about all the buildings his family owns. Like, we get it. Youre rich and powerful.

Naomie and Craig go to a couples therapist. The therapist looks like one of those cool dad types who wears Hawaiian shirts in his off time and says things like “I’m down. I’m hip. Right, guys?”

Craig: Im not saying that Naomie shouldnt question me ever because shes my girlfriend, Im saying she shouldnt be my girlfriend unless shes willing to have a blind and unwavering devotion to everything I say and do.

That’s not alarming at all…

Honestly, Im kind of with Craig on the whole being from the North is not yelling thing, though.

Craigs denying that he called Naomie a moron. This is truly some Donald Trump level of denial. WE HAVE YOU ON TAPE. Can we roll the playback, please? Craig, welcome to your tape.

Landon show sup to some bar and orders herself a shot and a beer. Respect, honestly.

Landons wearing a flannel because shes trying to attract more lumbersexuals. Where they at in Charleston, though? Also, girl, you have a boyfriend AND another older guy you’re trying to seduce. It’s enough.

Austen asks Landon about Drew who is apparently asking Landon if she loves him. Poor guy, he has no idea whats in store for him.

Landon says shes ready to settle down again because her dog is getting old, basically. Sure, thats as good a reason as any.

Shep walks in and says Where theres smoke theres fire, and Landon and Austen are looking very amorous. Cant you just say they look cozy like a normal fucking person? Also, no they do not look amorous. They look like two people having a normal conversation. Just because you use big words doesn’t mean you’re automatically right.

Drink again because Shep described Chelsea as laissez-faire. Just call her laid back, dude. Shes a person, not an economic theory of capitalism. He also thinks that he should be dating Chelsea because they both DGAF but you cant have two people in a relationship who DGAF; thats just a recipe for disaster. SOMEBODY has to give a fuck.

Thomas visits his dad whos approximately 800 years old. He seems to work for the Museum of the Confederacy

Me:

Thomas dad is like back in the good ol days you could get a hot dog for a nickel and a slave for a dime! Those were the days.

Im sorry but Thomass dad needs his own subtitles because I cannot understand this man for shit. He asks his dad for advice and his dads like Buy low, sell high. Thanks, dad, Why didn’t you just tell him plastics? That would have been just as helpful.

Austen and Chelsea are in some American Ninja Warrior wet dream/obstacle course situation. This looks like a bad date youd see in . NEXT!

Theyre betting each other for kisses like this is fucking middle school.

Oh wow, Austen had an older sister who passed away in an accident. Thats terrible. A moment of silence. This shit is sad.

Austens sisters name was Kyle and Chelsea is like OMG Kyle? Thats my brothers name! Bitch, this is not about you.

Patricias got some bougie-ass friend visiting her who literally specifies what type of glass she wants her vodka tonic in. Come on, this is a vodka tonic, not some expensive wine. Its gonna taste the same regardless of the type of stem on the glass.

Patricia is throwing an Indian themed party to celebrate her lily white friend.

Me:

Kathryn goes into Chelseas salon for a hair cut. I smell a set-up.

Kathryn: Shep told me you were a great stylist, aka the producers are making me come here.

Kathryn: Money doesnt grow on trees spoken by the lady whos trying out modeling instead of getting a real job to support her two infant children.

JD goes over to Thomas house (or office, I cant tell, fuck it) and Thomas is like I heard Kathryn and Elizabeth are hanging out. Like, no shit, they are friends? Thomas brings up Kathryns letter and this shit is long. Like 18 pages front and back long. I’m not recapping the contents of the letter because I fell asleep.

Kathryn: If I were to see Thomas Id just want to give him a big hug.

Ive never heard that synonym for punch to the face before.

Kathryn: Thats the thing with Thomas. Hes such an asshole but hes a good person.

Me trying to figure out how that makes any sense at all:

Patricia and her friend are wearing matching dog caftans. I have no comment. I mean, my grandma (may she rest in peace) used to wear 90s windbreaker tracksuit outfits well into the 2000s, so we all have our things.

Craig and Naomie are getting ready for the party and Craig is like Therapy was great, clearly the lesson we learned was please be nice to me tonight and dont treat me like shit. Real productive session.

Landon shows up to this party alone, so I guess Drew or whatever his name is is officially over.

Patricia is explaining how to eat curry, i.e. you take the rice and you put the curry on top of the rice. Cameron says Oh snap! What, putting shit on top of rice is too much for you to handle, Cam?

Cameran would be sucking up to this lady for not letting people curse at the dinner table. Bitch, please. You asked Shep last week of Chelsea gave him a hard-on. Just because you used the word “weiner” instead of “dick” doesn’t make you a saint. Please drop the Holier Than Thou act.

Patricia brings an Indian healer aka a lady whos gonna bring everyone up into the hot seat and make unfounded speculations about each of them. Can’t wait:

SHEP HAS NO CHILL. Craig goes up there and hes like Will Craig ever admit law isnt his true passion?

Healer lady: No, because law is his true passion.

Boom, roasted by the Indian healer!

Craig asks the healer about his connection with Naomie and the healer calls them soulmates. Naomies face is like fuck you, fuck you fuck you. This is her facial expression:

Kind of an odd reaction to hearing you and your current boyfriend are going to be together forever.

I wonder how much the producers paid this Indian healer to tell Landon that she has a soulmate in this room.

Whitney is bringing up Kathryns sobriety to the healer, aka a woman who doesn’t even know Kathryn, which seems highly inappropriate. What wont these producers do for ratings?

Craig: As a completely objective third party with no personal interest in the matter, I think what Kathryns doing is fine and she should be allowed to apologize.

Cam: Im sick of this, stay out of it!

^Says the woman whos constantly all up in everybodys business.

Honestly, this high society lady getting morally offended by the word fuck needs to fuck off. Come the fuck on, bitch, You were alive when abortions werent legal and youre gonna act like you cant stand hearing the word fuck? One more time because I’m petty: FUCK!!!!

Im truly over Cameran. Im starting the Cameran is over party. Tryna talk about We need to stay out of Thomas and Kathryns business when she stirs up everybodys business. Girl, bye. 

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/07/19/im-starting-the-cameran-eubanks-is-over-party/