#i can't just turn it off
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I love being transgender and I'll never stop.
Today was scary but raising 3k with my sister and being with my girlfriend filled me with hope. I love being transgender and I'll never stop.
#being trans is part of who i am#no matter what some folks want me to do#i can't just turn it off#it shapes how i experience the world#how i love#how i interact with my community#hell being trans saved me#and even if i could#i'll never stop being trans
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TUA's writers writing for Five's plotline in S4:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/5a05b4b276eb33b306fa3cd813654c7d/14c9fa3c6d64ede8-21/s540x810/84fb281c1e28a35193e68cf7d46a5726c9cdab79.jpg)
#oh my god I can't even view him in the same way now 😭#watching that really turned me off from the rest of S4 and just ruined my mood for the rest of it too#oh how the mighty have fallen#tua#the umbrella academy#umbrella academy#tua s4#tua spoilers#tua s4 spoilers#number five#five hargreeves
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regina spektor is a violent zionist, but i don't think it's constructive or honest at all for people to be like "well her art was always bad anyway." some terrible people have made great art. This idea that artists with unsavory morals can't make good art (1) only feeds into some people's mindset that if they dislike something, that MUST mean there is something ideologically wrong with it, and (2) some people then take longer to realize the true colors of their favorite artists because... good artists can't be ethically bad right?? and so they hang on to their faves and pretend they are so righteous and defend their every move when sometimes. sometimes you just gotta accept that your favorite art was made by somebody you don't agree with, and you have to identify how much you are willing to support someone like that and what lines you have that can't be crossed
#personally i've stopped streaming regina spektor because i don't want her to financially gain from my support#and i also can't get myself to listen anymore to her music that i've already previously purchased just bc i've been so turned off by her#like as a person#but she's had some bangers and i mourn for them#on a smaller scale like. doja cat for example. love her art. not sure about her as a person#but it hasnt crossed the line for me personally and so i continue to listen to her music#somebody shut me up
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do skully have pokemon?
Pumpkaboo is the obvious one, but y'know, sometimes the obvious one is the right one! (we'll say SUPER SIZE Pumpkaboo, just for fun. big pumpkin for big skeleton boy.) and another person actually also suggested Greavard, which I somehow hadn't considered, but feels so perfect that I feel like I should have. dangit.
(they can also have little Nightmare Suit costumes :D)
#art#twisted wonderland#pokemon#poketwst#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#(sorry for leaving anon off for a while! i've gotten a rash of spam and i'm gonna wait it out a couple days before turning it back on)#also apologies for the rest of this not really being pokemon related#i don't have anything right now for part 4 of the event so i'm gonna use this space to go off about it#because. oh man.#a sad lack of the scullsman but a FEAST of everyone else#gotta love malleus and leona uniting in the common goal of hunting trey down for trying to game their whiny pettiness#(trey doesn't know what to do with someone he can't easily distract with cake)#also further confirmation that malleus WILL kill a small child and leona WILL point and laugh the whole time#also sebek's plans revolving around what he knows he's good at: screaming extremely loudly and hoisting nerds#and let us not forget what i consider to be the crowning jewel#which is jamil figuring out IMMEDIATELY where scully has taken his prisoners#only for everyone else to just. literally refuse to do anything about it.#jamil just standing there and going 'WE KNOW WHERE THEY ARE! WE CAN JUST! GO GET THEM!!!! WHYYY AREN'T WE GOING'#visibly losing his entire mind and it's beautiful#top 10 twst event moments honestly#also some delightful character consistency from jade being all#'actually my dicking around is a sign of my immense trust in your abilities to get things done :)'#'but also consider: there are currently two housewardens chasing a child'#'alternately angrily screaming poetry and begging them not to sue'#'and if you will pardon my city of flowers...there is no fucking way i'm missing that'#lock shock and barrel did not sign up for this. how did these idiots turn out to be somehow weirder than the three of them.#twisted wonderland must be a frightening place indeed
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/26929f316b45ce88131e5bab56ca3401/6e397eb309f6519a-72/s540x810/30fc9667c6ee80be5a299bccf2afdbaa688c9e2b.jpg)
something unattainable
#fanart#genshin impact#dainsleif#lumine#kinda rough... I just wanted to turn my brain off and paint for this one ;w;#if we can't have dain in 4.5 at least let us cross the gate of everlasting mourning next ver i am on my knees-#cqtlatte (illust)
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the fact that irving canonically survives through the end of asunder to be at wynne's funeral is so fucking funny to me. nothing but love and respect for MY unstoppable cockroach morally grey machiavellian mage dad!!! he's survived in his position through multiple attempted rites of annulment and blood mage plots popping up left right and center around him. the chantry keeps trying to stamp him out but his dodge game is simply out of this world, divine. civil wars, political machinations and minefields, chantry atrocities, this wily old motherfucker is dodging and weaving his way through it all, not-quite-no-hits-taken-running-it-but-honestly-close-enough-under-the-circumstances style. if solas does succeed in tearing down the veil I would fully believe that one of the like three people still alive at the end of it all would be a very weary 90 year old first enchanter irving going 'oh this shit again huh'. the maker has cursed him for his hubris and his paperwork is never finished (affectionate, it's fine he canonically loves paperwork)
#we should have had the option to leave him in the fade instead of hawke or a warden#he would've just annoyedly shuffled his way back out of there a week later#dragon age#dragon age origins#first enchanter irving#he must be SO annoying to the chantry because it's heavily implied he's made his playground#out of tirelessly finding technicalities and loopholes to exploit that they can't *quite* call him on without domino effects going off#I think first enchanter in the circle system at origins times is a position that invariably and inevitably leaves you morally compromised#but I feel he really does his best within the rules he's given to play with and personally i love him a bit for that. and also#for being an unkillable lil shit. insufferable. inconquerable in his 'I'm about to be such an annoyance to you' impish spirit.#the I'm going to suffer but guess what. so are you of it all. traumatize the chantry back#I just imagine sophia sending letters home right before the vote for independence like '...dad I am hearing some INSANE rumours out here#what the actual fuck is going on back home???'#and he's like 'nothing that you need to worry about sweetie just keep living your best life and have fun killing darkspawn <3'#(there's something that makes me feel So much about how consistently his stance is like... 'you'll always be welcome here#but the circle doesn't *need* you; go be a warden and live your life'. he managed to fineagle freedom for you somehow and won't let you#turn and glance back. not even once. I feel somehow both so abandoned and so incredibly loved it's wild)#oc: sophia amell
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whenever a fanfic says that Mello is wearing a t-shirt I know they probably mean something like this:
but all I can imagine is this or this
Bonus Comic:
Bonus Bonus Shirtless Mello:
#my art#death note#mello#near#mello death note#near death note#death note brain rot#I can't imagine Mello wearing anything practical#Maybe it's just that I can't turn off my costume designer brain but it my mind he must always be doing the most#also yes the long sleeve shirt is the one he left Wammy's in that he diy-ed to be slutty#Also also Mello is offended by specifically by the implication that he's a virgin#I want to tag this meronia but idk if it counts??? I guess just assume that anytime I draw them together they were kissing moments before#i drew a Near to go with him that also has flat colors with fully rendered pants but this post was already getting too long
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Emesis Blue redraws!
#hhh#emesis blue#tf2#team fortress 2#medic tf2#Planned more but to be honest I'm surprised I managed to make at least two.#First drawing was “O-oh this is so fun!”#Second one was “OH I WILL NOT EVER DO IT AS GOOD AS THE FIRST ONE oh no I think I figured it out. Wait no it is very off. Anyway.”#Love the shading on the glove still.#and the whole first drawing I think I cooked.#dr fritz ludwig#loved the movie way too much.#Might make more in my usual style in the future.#cause this was just me smashing a pen into the tablet in hopes it turns into something similar. Never again.#others draw way too good I CAN'T#there is no love in that second drawing#maybe in the glove. But that's it#digital art#fanart
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The idea that uni protesters are "elitist ivy-league rich kids larping as revolutionaries" on Twitter and Reddit and even here is so fucking funny to me if you actually know anything about the student bodies at these unis. Take it from someone who's going to one of the biggest private unis in the US, 80% of the peers I know are either from the suburbs or an apartment somewhere in America, children of immigrants, or here on a student visa. I've heard about one-percenter students, but I've never met one in person. Like, don't get me wrong, the institution as a whole is still very privileged and white. I've talked with friends and classmates about feeling weird or dissonant being here and coming from such a different background. But in my art program, I see BIPOC, disabled, queer, lower-income students and faculty trying to deconstruct and tear that down and make space every day. So to take a cursory glance at a crowd of student protesters in coalitions that are led by BIPOC & 1st/2nd-gen immigrant students and HQ'd in ethnic housings and student organizations and say, "ah. children of the elite." Get real.
#also idk how to tell you this but even if it were true. wealthy children potentially sacrificing their educational careers to protest is#a good thing actually. idk how to tell you that caring about people from other nations is good#personal#“this war has nothing to do with most students cuz nobody's getting drafted” idk how to explain to you that we should be angry#that our tuitions of 10s of thousands of dollars that we pay every year for an education is being used to fund a genocidal campaign#also the implication that if you go to a uni institution you are automatically privileged by participation no matter your bg#i didn't /want/ to go to this school. i was supposed to go to a school with an art/animation program. but i realized my immigrant#parents have been working their whole lives to get me here. and turning the opportunity down would be a disservice to their sacrifice#this is getting into convos of “what 2nd gen kids owe their parents” which is different for everyone but. yeah#i just get pissed off at seeing people misrepresenting student bodies as “wealthy” and “privileged” and “elite” when it's such a blatant li#i remember a year ago a friend told me they can't fly home to hong kong for winter break because the plane tickets are too expensive#so they have to find temporary housing around the area#last quarter for a film doc class my film partner made a doc on a small group of marxist grad students from india discussing praxis#during a rally a few months ago in response to police presence the coalition invited palestinian students to speak about their experiences#and lead songs and read poems they wrote. these are STUDENTS. are they elitist too?#this is not to disregard my own personal privilege either.#this whole narrative's just to rationalize a lack of empathy to me. seeing a 19yo student get shot by a rubber bullet and your first#reaction is “HAW! HAW! bet richy rich didn't see THAT coming when she put on her terrorist hood!”#newsflash. these big uni campuses are HAUNTED by the violence of past protests and revolutions and police brutality. we know.#why do you think these coalitions have been making reinforced barricades at record speed
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On average, what is the total MONTHLY amount that you spend on dining out*?
*(This doesn't only count going out to restaurants, but also stuff like picking up fast food to bring home, getting a coffee on the way to work, getting a premade sandwich from a grocery store deli during lunch, buying a quick snack from a convenience store or food cart whilst walking somewhere, ordering a pizza or any other food to be delivered to your home, etc.)
*(If you often dine out in groups/as a household: calculate and divide the costs so that you get a Per Person average. This is for YOU individually, NOT the total household/group costs)
(I'm sure polls similar to this have been made before (very common topic), I just haven't personally seen one that I can remember, so, I was curious to do my own! I was discussing this with a group of people today and it was very interesting to see how widely the number varied between individuals. :0c )
(Reblog for bigger sample size if you can, and feel free to explain your answer in tags if there's anything extra to add!)
#polls#tumblr polls#I'm mostly in the 0/1 - 25$ category. Maybe the rare month is a bit over $25 if there's something specific going on like birthday.#Which I'm NEVER eating in an actual restaurant (erm... covid... plus I just hate restaurant environments. i would rather pickup#the food and bring it home to a peaceful quiet environment that I control lol). But more typically like stopping by a grocery store deli#section or something. I don't have coffee that much. And I can't eat fast food much due to my health issues/diet restriction stuff#so if I'm out like coming back from an appointment and I start feeling really sick and weak. I know that a hamburger will just#blow up my system and cause nausea or something. So I try to pick the breadiest most#neutral looking turkey sandwich at the safeway deli to eat during the hour ride home or whatever lol#I actually kind of wish I could do stuff like get food more often vecause it would take the burden of cooking everything off of me#but.. alas... Money... and Health Things... T o T#I still wouldn't do it ALL the time but like... once a week instead of once a month or something.. or maybe turning into a coffee#person.. I do love drinks A LOT .. i am a drink person who will have 5 different drinks sipping on at all times#But i just have to make them all myself mostly lol#And I cant really have too much coffee since it will make me sick. so like.. teas and juice mostly#When I inevitably become a millionaire by never using social media never networking and only finishing one#sculpture every 5 months which I dont even post about or sell - then I shall... get more drinks..#I will somehow wean my body onto coffee and drink one a day solely for the ritual of it#Though even then... I would still probably just like.. buy the mateirals to make it at home or something#Like if you had a million dollars you could just buy a kitchen grade ice cream machine and other stuff to make your own milkshakes and#coffees and smoothies and bubble teas. Genuinely I think even if I were a BILLIONAIRE I would still look at playing likr $8 for a single#coffee and go .. uh.... I could just buy the equipment to make this and then save that money. PLUS. its in my house now so no need to#have to leave. I can make my own drinks in the comfort of home. .. ideal..#Like no matter how rich I ever got I would still have the lingering scroogey stinginess. like i am NOT paying for that. I will jus#make it myself. Especially if it was an Everyday thing. Anythign thats part of my routine I try to optimize and make as efficient as#possible... ANYWAY.. In an IDEAL world I would get treats. but probably not that much. as on a daily basis it would start to get#to me and I would just save up to buy kitchen machinery if I was rich lol
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Leon S. Kennedy in Resident Evil 6 (2012)
#crimson's gifs: resident evil#Resident Evil#RE#Resident Evil 6#RE6#Leon S. Kennedy#Leon Kennedy#Leon S Kennedy#Leon Scott Kennedy#DO NOT. SEXUALISE HIM IN MY TAGS. DO NOT BE WEIRD ABOUT HIM PLEASE. I DO NOT CARE. I DONT WANNA READ THAT SHIT!!! 😭😭😭#Cant wait to be done with RE6#Im trying to figure out whether to do RE4. RE4R or RE3R next#If I do RE4R Ill have to mute my notifs and block people tho I just know it cos some of yall forget a person is behind this account#and just be saying the grossest shit about Leon bruh. Can't yall behave for like 5 seconds#To all the people who are sick of my bitching and are not like that im sorry you gotta keep seeing this im just as tired as you 😭😭😭#turned off reblogs for all leon sets because time after time and you freaks still subject me to gross ass tags
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How it feels to not like timebomb after s2
#I'M NOT A HATER I SWEAR I ACTUALLY REALLY LIKE IT ON PAPER#i do however think that it came literally out of nowhere and was hella rushed and kinda ridiculous#like. if the argument is that original ekko fell in love with jinx it doesn't make sense because they were enemies for most of their lives#if the argument is that current ekko fell in love with au powder and now projects these feelings on jinx it's kinda uh. messed up#because she's a whole different person. entirely. it doesn't matter if both these version started out as a 9-year old powder. they had#extremely different lives and experiences and thinking that “there's still this kind of powder in jinx deep down” is straight-up awful#OR even if he didn't project his feelings for powder on jinx why would he love her in the current universe? last time they met she blew them#up and now she wants to commit suicide. there's literally no reason for him to have any kind of feelings except the slight friendly#affection that's left from all those years ago. and yet the show and most importantly the fandom treats them like a couple??? i don't get it#also it's kinda insane that s2 turned jinx and ekko into flat shipping material#again. obviously i have nothing against the shippers and do not condemn it in any way. i'm just expressing my thoughts on the matter#also what pisses me off the most. is how in ep9 jinx in fully painted with ekko's symbols here and there. has the bandage (?) on her chest#like vi. has a hood that looks like a drawing that isha made. and yet there's no fishbones or any reference to silco at all#i mean. i get it s2 hates him but i can't help it#they gave her all these relationships and pretended that they're significant to her and yet they didn't have any proper development#to really earn it#arcane critical#arcane season 2#anti timebomb#jinx arcane#ekko arcane
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au where alan uses vr to get into the desktop and like nothing goes wrong until he realizes that he's feeling way too many phantom sensations for it to be normal for vr and a few of them shouldn't even be possible (feeling them even though he didn't see the touch) and when he tries to take off the headset it doesn't come off
#and he starts freaking out#and he manages to turn it off but he still can't actually take it off so hes just blond until he turns it back on#and he doesn't know what to do#and now the sticks are freaking out#and now he can actually FEEL HIS VR AVATAR OH GOD ITS LIKE AN ACTUAL BODY OH GOD HELP#he would say that i feel#anyways. if you have something to say PLEASE SAY IT I'LL DO ANYTHING#stick!alan#stick alan#ava alan becker#ava#animator vs animation#alan becker#my stuff
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Buggy the Clown || Anime vs. Live Action comparison shots
#One Piece#opgraphics#One Piece Live Action#Buggy#Buggy the Clown#OPLA#oplaedit#Jeff Ward#*mine#good on 'em for keeping this iconic scene in lmao#but didn't care for how they changed it to Luffy having the idea to separate and lock up Buggy's body parts#when it was actually Nami who thought of the idea in the manga#like she STOLE and tied up Buggy's body parts like the THIEF that she is#why tf would they change that sheesh 🙄#ANYWAY i can't believe that the OPLA turned Buggy into the most celebrated and hated character here on this hellsite#i mean i need y'all to know that he is really just a dumb pathetic loser clown whose true strength lies in riding off others' coattails#and while i'm still not a fan of the live action i did surprisingly enjoy Jeff Ward's performance as Buggy
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one problem with a theatrical adaption of tlt is htn, where the reveal that Gideon lives on works because of the change of second person to first.
the only way i can think of it working is that the actor playing gideon works backstage, like the lights system (but is hidden from the audience aside from subtle hints)
the biggest hint is when when wake breaches pal's river bubble she 'breaks' the lighting system and the stage goes dark. harrow is ushered into the wings by pal so she doesn't see anything, but the lights flick back on just before the curtains drop for a scene change, and pal looks directly up at the light box in surprise and smiles. if the audience is quick to turn around they can see a flash of a black robe.
Oh boy my friend, have you come to the right place!!
So, fun fact about ninja. Bear with me, I am going somewhere with this. The image of a ninja covered head to toe in black, with a hood and mask, comes from Kabuki theatre. It was originally a stagehand uniform. Like stagehands in modern theatre, stagehands in Kabuki would wear all black to signify that they were not really there, and whatever effect they were causing (carrying a prop, creating a breeze, ect.) was to be taken as happening on its own. Basic stagehand stuff, a lot of productions in many styles around the world do it, especially if they don't have fancy rigging systems.
Someone (I don't remember who now, or in what play) had the idea to dress the ninja in a production up as a stagehand. In the convention of the theatre, this made them invisible. The audience was already so used to ignoring stagehands, they didn't know any more than the characters that the ninja was present, despite the actor being clearly visible on stage. Which meant when the ninja struck, it was as if out of nowhere. I can only imagine the uproar in the theatre the first time it happened. It worked so well as to become commonplace, and the rest is history. The popular image of a ninja is still a kabuki stagehand.
So, back to the stage play of Harrow the Ninth. I think you've hit almost exactly on how to incorporate the Gideon twist into a theatrical production. But not as a lighting tech. Gideon is a stage hand. Maybe there would be more than one stagehand, maybe she would be the only one, but she would operate in full view of the audience, literally setting the scenes. I think it works best if she's the only one, but if the production needs more, she should subtly stand out in some way. As the play went on, we would notice that this one stage hand... increasingly interacts with Harrow, though Harrow never acknowledges it. At first it might look like she's playing Harrow's necromancy, because that would be the main special effect she would need to help with. When Harrow is unconscious at the end of a scene, it's always the same stagehand carrying her out. But we all know she's not really there. Until Palamedes acknowledges her. Turns to look right at her, and speaks to her. I can see the scene clearly. He would look at her, stunned, until Gideon finally took off her mask. The line "Kill us twice, shame on God," would be addressed to Gideon, and then he would turn back to Harrow, kiss her on the forehead, and tell her to go. Gideon, always out of Harrow's line of sight, would guide Harrow away while Harrow looked back at Palamedes.
#the locked tomb#harrow the ninth#I have a few ideas how to do gideon as harrow but it needs a lot of workshopping#I love this idea#htn spoilers#gideon nav#speaking as someone who has worked as a light tech that specifically doesn't work so well#because techs are rarely on stage messing with the lights during a production#maybe if there was a spot on the catwalk or if the array was small and the gels needed changing#but anyone who can turn off all the lights on stage is usually behind the audience in a little control room with a lot of switches and dial#that said the stage SHOULD go completely dark immediately after this scene#and the lights should come up suddenly on Gideon and Harrow alone on stage together#harrow having a crisis and staring resolutely forward while Gideon behind her reaches for her and can't touch her#just for a brief moment
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keep smoking, i love you keep smoking, i love you keep smoking, i still love you but i don't wanna die, i don't wanna die i don't wanna die, i don't wanna die i don't wanna die, i don't wanna die i don't wanna die, i don't wanna die
#FINALLY a success#i've wanted to make an edit w them w this caption for literal months.....#but it had to be good. i tried like five times. i had to earn the right to use this song#i don't think it's the 'best' twin fantasy song but it's my favorite by 5000 miles do you know what i mean. very special song#me when i can't turn this thing off it keeps following me used to be so human now it's just a machine i can't turn this thing off it keeps#ts4#ts4 edit#ts4 render#the sims 4
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