#i appreciate you breaking the news

[botanicallyinclinednerd]

*looks at the camera like I'm on The Office.* *sighs as I fix my tie and gently place my hand on your shoulder.* I don't know how to tell you this..........but there's like zero Mei centric fics on ao3 and instead of DragonFruit you're only getting SpicyNoodles (Red Son x MK) and maybe if you're lucky, a DragonFruit or Trio Ship hint.

*stares at the wall*

*cracks my knuckles* Looks like I'm gonna have some work to do once I'm done watching the show

[egophiliac]

(incoherent bird soldier screeching)

okay, I'm ready, I'm totally ready, I --

(even more incoherent bird soldier screeching)

[likesdoodling]

Annatar during chapter 39 of The Harrowing by Chthonion~

And then doodles with some of my favourite bits from the afore mentioned chapter -

I've been meaning to do stuff from this chapter since it came out cause it is amazing- (in a 'wanting to suffocate Annatar with hugs and cups of tea, and the collateral sufferers too- like getting Maedhros back to Fingon for recuperation' kind of a way) - at revealing just how messed up Annatar's mindset is. I definitely recommend the Maedhros pov as well- the amount of '... I don't think I even want to unpack that statement' and 'seriously. We have gone over this. At least three times. In the last twenty minutes. Why do you not get it??' that goes through his head during that conversation is just- Amazin~

:D

This fic is really cool and I highly recommend it to anyone even vaguely into lotr or the Silmarillion.

:D

@chthonion

>:D

[luckynumberthreed]

Still alive btw

[gayofthefae]

Mike's surprise and relief when El says she missed him. He takes a deeep breath.

Bless him. She's not leaving you, bud.

The way he's so eased then. He doesn't initiate the serious part of the conversion, she does, which means she probably had more to say, but her saying she missed him gives him the strength to start to try to tell her the truth then.

He feels like maybe it will be okay. Maybe she'll stay. She missed him. Even when they were on bad terms, she still missed him.

It's so simple, but so common and easy to fall into. The idea that when she stopped needing him, she would leave him because nothing else was keeping her. But missing him was.

She didn't need him. I think he still knows that. The original monologue says that he could tell when she left, and they came up on her already having escaped on her own, only in need of a ride.

He knows she doesn't need him because he knows he didn't save her when he showed up. But he didn't know yet that that didn't matter to her.

He probably thought that because he failed to be a good boyfriend then failed to be her hero, he was confirmed as useless to her. They were having a nice time for now, but she could laugh with any other member of the party too.

But then she said she missed him. Even though he didn't save her.

Even if he doesn't know Will was lying, he knows Will was embellishing. He knows Will was telling him a story about her through his eyes, not quoting her. So "she needs you" was a mistranslation on Will's part, but what he meant remained. "She's not leaving"

Because Mike doesn't need to believe that El needs him. He needs to believe that she'll want him even when she doesn't. She needs to need nobody, which is where she is now. He only wants her to need him because he doesn't believe she'll want him.

But I think this tells him that she does. He hasn't told her he loves her since their fight. He hasn't righted his wrongs. She loves herself now. She got herself out. He didn't save her. Even when he was of absolutely no "use" to her...she still missed him.

Because she missed him. And the surprise is beautiful and so sad. Because he never thought of that before. He never thought that his use could just be sitting there with her wearing pizza box sunglasses and giggling and she'd stay for that.

But she will. And he knows that now. And that's what pushes him forward to start talking about it here. He could have been hesitant and let her lead the way and followed when she got there or corrected her or whatever she was gonna say, but at this point, he took the lead.

Because he trusted her. He trusted her to love him enough. To love this "loser" enough not to leave him. Because she missed him even when he hadn't done anything to earn it.

And so he starts talking. He starts telling her the truth because his deepest fear was that if he couldn't give her what she needed, she'd leave. But he couldn't, and she stayed. Because he's what she wanted.

He feels safer here. She asked him to do something. He can't do it. But she already thinks that. And already thinking that, she missed him. Still.

He was terrified it would be "since you couldn't say it, I'm leaving you", but it was "I missed you". Whether she was gonna break up with him or not over that, a break up doesn't mean leaving and she was never going to leave. And he knew that here. It would have been terrifying if she had said "say it now or I'm leaving" and he still couldn't.

But instead, she said 'I'm sad you can't say it, but you're still important to me.' And she might have at worst said 'maybe we just stop being the type of relationship where I want/expect you to say it'. From her surprised reaction when she thought he was going to a moment later, it's clear after their 4x03 fight she had no expectation of him suddenly being able to (logical, that's really television trope-y for the answer to be insecurity and not just not loving a person and that sucky).

She thought she had her answer. She thought he didn't love her and that meant she was unlovable. Now she's learned he doesn't love her and that has nothing to do with her. So she's telling him that she loves him but can't keep waiting for him because she loves herself too much for that. But she will not stop loving him in doing that.

And that is the best thing he could have heard. That's why he relaxes like he does. Feeling safe. Because in just "I missed you," she just said "thinking I knew for a fact that you didn't love me, when you were away, I still wanted you back in my life". So just as she is thinking "he doesn't love me but it has nothing to do with me, I know that now", he is now feeling safe to say "I don't love you like that but it has nothing to do with you."

THIS is what the monologue later lacked. He felt completely safe to tell the truth. She was not going to leave or die regardless of result, so the only choice he had to make was not "keep her or lose her", it was "tell the truth or don't" with no deeper bearing to those than on himself.

It's a sad truth to tell. So he looks a little sad. But notice how he doesn't look nearly as scared as he used to.

And getting these gifs, I also notice that this is reflected in the blocking! They are now sitting on an even plane, where she was above him before. Because he is not scared of her reaction and she is not dependent on whatever he might say.

[neptunesailing]

even though im one of the last ones to say this HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!! heres to a happy hiiai 2024 !!!

edit: you can see the full colored version here!

[theartingace]

Did you ever finish that centaur compendium booklet you mentioned a while back?

Not yet unfortunately 😔 it is still technically in progress and it is a life goal at this point to finish it, but i got taken hard by the SAD this year and have been dealing with major work-related burnout so it's been an ongoing negotiation with me @ me wanting to put it together and also life being a knock down drag out recently.

Rest assured as i get back to putting things together it will be my pinned post here!

[somegrumpynerd]

Time for a new toy!

Tube won by a pretty big landslide, so tomorrow there'll be a cardboard tube in the garden!

So that means..

(Note: I changed the paper option to pages just to make it less confusing now that paper bag is an option, it still attracts the same cat though!)

[tittyinfinity]

contemplating deleting my blog soon I might make a new blog but idk

[purplebehittindifferent]

Holy crap is that Chara from the Chara Timeline?!?!??

Awwww mannnnnnnnn 😎

(Hi @lilybug-02 !!! 💜✨💜)

[queer-omens-in-the-archives]

haven't written a single word in either of our AUs today because of travel prep + so so so sleepy and I'm trying to be so brave about it but I miss my blorbos. When will our blorbo time come back from the war (end of year festivities)

[queseraphita]

It didn't truly strike me harder how devastating the grief and trauma Cheng Xiaoshi felt about that Chen Xiao mission and how he was probably raised in that part of China by his parents and having to confront the feelings of all the people he had bonds with in that area until i was reading posts from Chinese readers explaining how Cheng Xiaoshi has a northern accent and Lu Guang has a southern Chinese accent

[causenessus]

congratulations on 1k you deserve it and more ‼️‼️‼️ your writing is beautiful and amazing and funny and smart and we’re all so lucky to get to read it and selfishly i hope you keep writing forever <3 i’d read anything u write !!!!!!

AAA thank you sm eggy!! i truly am so thankful that I've gotten the chance to meet and interact with such an amazing and talented person as you <3 thank you for all the ways that you've inspired me!! your writing is always so creative and perfectly thought out I can't wait to see what you have in store for the future and I will always be here to support you!!! <3333333

[softceleste]

The fact I honestly thought I'd pull off playing College Craze and being normal about it, and then less than a week later I've already played it multiple times, made a duel MC au, a Pinterest board, and recreated some of the PopMe pages, is genuinely not lost on me.

[raelyn-dreams]

Okay so Twinkle Kuuchuusen is AMAZING (as expected and I will try to gather my thoughts about it later), but THE SOLOS OH MY GOD THE SOLOS AND THE LYRICS I'M!!!

They both reference 2x2 a lot, and you can see their development so much from their previous solos! There's a big theme of acceptance and both and they're driving me crazy with it!

Hinata's '"street" being bathed in blue and how he accepts it as a part of himself before declaring he's going to light it up with colors because he'll love himself even more!!! The way he doesn't try to gloss over the negative but decides he'll stick to his positive worldview while taking everything in stride! How he knows now that no matter how far they drift their hearts will always reconnect!

And Yuta walking the line between two worlds confidently, not looking back into the shadow of days past and pushing ahead into the unknown! Going all out and no longer suppressing his feelings, engraving them into his heart and making bold decisions as himself! The way he connects their worldviews with their differing light, knowing someone will always be at his back no matter what!

If there was ever any doubt within me about the future of 2wink, I feel like these solos resolved it. They really have come to a temporary truce and peace with each other, they'll stay together while continuing to push and compete in their separate ways. These songs feel like letters to each other almost, about how they're able to move forward with their own worldviews without shame, but will always hold the other close. And even if they do come to that breaking point in the future, after the dust has settled, they'll still be there watching the night sky - in a much better place than where they started.

[beatriceportinari]

Inside the mermaid's stomach