#elmike textual analysis

[gayofthefae]

You know of course depression plays a part in it but people say with Mike his inability to say it was what was causing her to think that besides that but I'd like to remind us all of the saying "If he loved you, you'd know"

We need to come back to the fact that yes, Mike couldn't say that he was in love with El. But there are other ways to convey to someone that you're in love with them.

Actions speak louder than words and, really, it was never about lacking the words. It was about how lacking the words pointed out clearer than ever that the actions weren't there in the first place.

Having the words can shield the fact that he doesn't seem like he's in love with either. You assume that both are there. But if one goes away and there's nothing left...you can't really unlearn that. She knows that he loves her now. I wonder what she knows of him being in love with her.

Because she didn't confront him on the word itself until prompted. Their original fight was about his actions. "The way you looked at me," for example. It wasn't he was in love with her but just couldn't say the word.

It was that not being able to say the word meant that there were no bells and whistles to distract

from things like this

Because that argument looks different with no supporting evidence of him not loving her outside of the words. But the words are her supporting evidence. To her initial point: his actions. The words weren't even part of her original argument. She hadn't even felt the need to reach for them as proof.

That argument was not just based on his words. So how can the solution be? He was acting like he wasn't in love with her. She caught it. And at that point, probably started noticing he never said it. Because I doubt she started counting days from when he first said or even when she left if she assumed as she seemed to for a while that she did. It didn't seem like she's was counting every day for eight months. It seemed like she started to notice and checked her facts to find they were right. Something prompted that. Maybe a couple letters in a row were a little dry. Maybe she needed it more one day, then noticed that week after week it didn't come and checked back.

But her observation of him not saying it was prompted by his actions. It's why she didn't even bring up his words herself. Only when he argued her. They were her trump card, not her argument.

The fight was about Mike's actions. His words were just an example. He still hasn't solved his actions. Remember, by her account:

This was him not convincing her too.

He has not fixed this. He has stalled it. At best, he put it back to where it was before she noticed, not before it was true.

[gayofthefae]

The way he was and then regretted it and apologized 😭

food for thought....

[gayofthefae]

You know how I know Mike is queer?

These are the same person. Mike is an inherently caring, loving, and protective person. It's what Will called out in 4x08 and reminded us of with Mike's desire and practice in attempt to be a "hero" and be able to help the ones he loves.

But when El tells him she feels unloved by him, he doesn't comfort her. At all. He defends himself. He doesn't even say "yes I do". He says "I say it". Even when he's arguing that he loves her, he is defending himself, not comforting her. If he was comforting her he would have reacted to her crying at all. He doesn't. He just becomes increasingly desperate and escalates the tactics that are making her cry more.

Because the accusation is that important to him. Not many things could be so important to him that he would deprioritize her or taking care and protecting and comforting those he loves. He even does quite well at it at the start of the scene. We have PROOF that he is pretty stable these days with any sort of accusation or invalidation with how well he takes "you don't understand" and simply asks questions without any sort of offense. So he CAN take it. He takes it IN THIS CONVERSATION.

But when she says he doesn't love him, he stops the "they just don't know you". He stops the "don't say that about yourself, you're lovable," which is what this is really about for her. If he had said that even if he couldn't say it himself, it might have still helped a little bit: frame it as his own fault if he can't. But he couldn't do that. Instead, he went with how it reflected on HIM that he couldn't say it and defended himself AGAINST her. FOUGHT her on it.

There are few things that can make him fight a person. And they've all actually been pretty similar. They're all El:

"You're prioritizing El over Will"

"There is something off about your relationship with El"

"You're prioritizing El over [Will]"

"He's right that your and [El's] relationship wasn't a good one"

"Your and El's relationship wasn't a good one"

"You're prioritizing El over [Will]"

"You don't love [El]"

He is comforting. He is kind. He prioritizes others' comfort and safety consistently. He takes other accusations fairly lightly and focuses back onto the person making them and their emotions. And yet, what does he say in those instances and only those instances?

"SHUT. UP."

"You lying piece of shit. You're crazy!"

"It's not my fault you don't like girls!"

"He's just some crazy old man"

"You're conspiring against me!"

"We're friends! We're friends!"

"You're being ridiculous. What is this?"

People who say his character has gotten worse are stating it under the idea that he is always like this. The entire discovery so many people, including myself, had that he's queer was because we noticed that his outbursts were consistent. People think he's random and angry because they think the situations are random: Lucas, Hopper, Will, Max, El. But they're forgetting to note what each of those people questioned about him right before.

The biggest proof is that he doesn't ever talk like this outside of these situations. It's lighthearted debates and empathetic conversations.

Mike Wheeler is a kind person. If he said "You're being ridiculous. What is this?" it is not just because he's scared of vulnerability or commitment.

[gayofthefae]

And what if Mike knew full well that he loved El he just also knew well enough not to say it. And that's what his reaction is. "Shit." Not "oh, shit." "Shit!"

Nobody was supposed to know because he knew how they'd take it. And he knew how they'd silently hold him to it. And he knew how she'd take it. Maybe a while down the line when they'd been just friends for a while, he could, but that wasn't here yet. Because he said it like common knowledge. Second nature. (As an audience, we didn't actually even know until this moment that they hadn't said it). It wasn't even the point of the sentence. "I love her and I CAN'T lose her again!" He was scared to lose her. That's all he was trying to say. We don't even see his reaction shot until after all the other's. He's reacting to their reactions.

So what if this

ISN'T him realizing something subconscious that's come to the surface. What if it's him panicking because he slipped up.

What if it isn't "woah, what did I just say?" but "oh god, what did I just do".

Look at him. He isn't panicking or thinking. He's examining reactions.

[gayofthefae]

Thinking again about "you're my superhero" and how powers use anger and sadness, not love, and how there were two words used with spite in that note, not one

"Dear Mike,

I have gone to become a superhero again.

From,

El"

She put "superhero" on the same plane as *"From"*. OH, She did not like that shit at all.

[gayofthefae]

I'd like to distinctly note the episode 3 thing because with 2 9 episode seasons, that is exactly the end of the first act. A perfect point for a distinct inciting incident. She's angry at them so she leaves to learn more about her past and who she is. She does that then decides to come back despite people she went to encouraging her to stay. She doesn't need them, she wants them. "I know. But I can save them."

And she knows they can't give her what she originally asked for. Hopper isn't Mike. And Mike isn't in love with her. But she comes back anyways because that wasn't why she loved them and she can find those things elsewhere. It doesn't mean she wants to give up everything else they are to her.

So. Now that we're all finally on the "Mike Wheeler has been forced into a parental rather than boyfriend role for El" track...lets talk about THIS damn near direct parallel moment in (wait for it) both S2 and S4's Episode Three.

We start with the parentified male figure putting together an "eggo offering" and going to a moping El in her room in the hopes of getting her to open up after they've made a "mistake" in her eyes, which means she's stonewalling them, which they both comment on.

We then move into a conversation about an adjacent problem that both Hopper and Mike are trying to solve thinking it will get her to talk...which leads into a whole other issue that has been bubbling up (without her communicating it) in El's mind.

That's followed by El latching onto one word they say and then getting upset about how they don't understand her attempts to communicate her feelings...to the point that she moves into an argumentative position, puts them on the defensive, and demands (repeatedly) an answer to something that neither one of them can clearly give her (soon with Hop, love with Mike)—

—and we end with El shutting them out entirely...only to go off on her own to find the answers she wants by herself (her going to find Mama in S2...and (what turns out to be) Papa in S4).

We even get a clear marker that the S4 scene should remind us of something else with this line by Mike...and the fact that El is mirrored...while rebuilding her diorama of Hopper's cabin???

—like? besties. There is "on the nose" and then there's "we need you to notice this because it gives away a idea/framework you need to grasp to understand the wider narrative.” This one is definitely the latter.

Quadruple bonus points for the fact that this is what Hopper says about Mike in the S2 scene, when El says she wants to see him...because its what's most true about the parental role Mike has taken on in Hopper's place come season four.

[gayofthefae]

They could have had Mike say "it wasn't fate...", make it just a tiny bit more salvageable. Open it up for that subtext of "we weren't destined to meet originally, BUT-"

But no. "It's not fate". It's. It is not.

They could have had him say "It isn't fate that we met, I'm not special, anyone could have been so lucky, and one day she'll realize that" as was supported by the context (and the reason I misremember it). Instead, they had him say "It isn't fate that we're together now. It isn't destiny for us to be together. It's just dumb luck. Anyone can fulfill that role for her. And soon she'll realize that too", 'she's already started to' as is said in the original script.

His words are insults. No doubt about it. But they didn't have him insult the past, something he can reframe (to make it consistent with when he does in his speech to her later). They had him insult the present. That isn't about reframing and retrospect. That's what he feels now. He didn't call meeting her dumb. He called dating her dumb. They switched tenses in the MIDDLE to make sure of that.

Such a small change. They didn't make.

He thinks their relationship is dumb but for reasons he is desperate to hide. He thinks it's dumb but that's grounds for him to keep it, not end it. It'd be grounds for her to end it. She loves him, but he's not irreplaceable. He's praying she doesn't notice because to him, she is. A boyfriend who will love her is easy to find and as soon as she realizes that she'll stop settling for one who can't and leave him, looking around or waiting for someone who can. But a girlfriend who shields him from questionings like "You called a couple of times. It's been a year, Mike. Meanwhile El has like a book of letters from you" is dangerous to disappear for even a second.

Just like how he knew he loved her before he let it slip out in front of people in an emotional moment of fearing losing her, he already knew he thought their relationship was stupid and over too. He just knew if anyone ever heard him say it, they'd hold him to it, because those are the kinds of words a better person considers actionable.

tldr: he doesn't think meeting El was stupid, he thinks being with her is. He's not scared she'll realize it could have been anyone and wish it had been, he's scared she'll realize it could be anyone and replace him. Because if she ever thought their relationship was stupid, it would mean that they weren't right together and she'd end it. If he does, it means he's not right and he has to stay with her at all costs to hide that fact.

[gayofthefae]

Mike's reactions to people saying his relationship with El seems "off"

"You lying piece of shit. You're crazy."

"It's not my fault you don't like girls."

"[You're] conspiring against me."

"You're being ridiculous. What is this?"

And people think he isn't suspiciously extreme in his defensiveness...

Yeah.....

"You've been acting weird, you might be going through something."

"Well YOU 'might' need to go to a fucking MENTAL HOSPITAL because YOU'RE THE GAY ONE who's making up LIES about me because THEY GOT IN YOUR HEAD."

[gayofthefae]

Thinking about Mike coming from his fight with Will to influencing his fight with El.

"And us?" "We're friends"

"You don't love me anymore?" "Who said that I didn't?"

He would never think Will would actually say something like that. But it IS just one more example of what's actually constantly on his mind: who knows.

His life is a constant state of "1. act straight 2. fail 3. identify witnesses 4. damage control"

[gayofthefae]

I love that it's the season after their bonding and joy too.

"What makes you happiest is actually the joy you feel when you're free" because what Jonathan says isn't exactly "don't like the stuff people want you to", it's "like the stuff you do". In the way that you do.

He likes El. Just not how he's supposed to. And that scene before Jonathan says that is about that. About the fact that he likes El.

It's what they're story is all about: that not being together isn't bad or worse. The scene isn't about him feeling like he's being forced to like her. It's about him being so happy with her when he's free from the romantic pressures towards her of the people around him.

So, we all know that in s1, Lucas is mad at Mike for spending so much time with El and even Dustin tells Mike later on: “[…] and then this girl shows up and starts living in your basement, and all you ever wanna do is pay attention to her.”

Clearly, Lucas’ and Dustin’s only evidence as to why they think that Mike is in love with El is the fact that he spends time with her/pays more attention to her and it all starts with Mike skipping school to stay at home with El. At home Mike shows El around and later finds out that El knows something about Will and from then on he mostly defends her and approaches her even friendlier. He chooses to believe her and tells Dustin and Lucas to do the same which especially Lucas thinks is absolutely insane. Nonetheless Mike stands up for her instead of siding with Lucas and that leads to Lucas accusing Mike of being in love with El.

And the crucial point is that Lucas accuses Mike unprompted and phrases his accusation in a way that erases all indications that this is his personal opinion. It sounds like he’s talking about a general fact:

“If you love her so much, why don’t you marry her?” -> Lucas’ way of wording implies that Mike’s mannerisms alone already give away that he’s in love with El. It’s not Lucas who simply perceives Mike to be in love with El, no, Mike conveys it all on his own. But this obviously isn’t the truth of the situation which is why Mike is pretty confused by Lucas’ statement.

“You look at her all like ‘Oh El, El, El, El, El, El! Will you marry me?’” -> Again, Lucas’ choice of words implies that it’s a general fact that Mike looks at El a certain way which shows that he’s in love with her, instead of telling Mike that he personally picked Mike’s look up at something romantic.

Lucas doesn’t say “I think you’re in love with El” he says “You are in love with El” and therefore basically dictates Mike on who he is and who he likes. But of course Lucas isn’t the only one who does that.

Right after Dustin explains to Mike why Lucas is jealous [and says the quote from the top of this post] Mike tells him “That’s not true.” which Dustin replies to with:

“It’s true and you know it!” -> Just like Lucas, Dustin tells Mike what is true and what is not and completely disregards Mike’s own opinion on the topic. He tells Mike that him being in love with El is the general and overall truth which is obvious to everyone and he even goes a step further and dictates Mike on what he knows and what he doesn’t!! Which then leads to Mike thinking that maybe he should be in love with her!

Even later in the season Nancy asks Mike “Do you like El?” and by doing so she unknowingly proves Lucas and Dustin right. Mike’s behavior does show that he’s in love with El, it is obvious to everyone around him and therefore him being in love with El must be the truth/fact!! But why doesn’t he feel anything then? Why can anyone else see it but he himself can’t? Shouldn’t he feel something? Shouldn’t he see it too? Yeah, he should. But why doesn’t he? Is there something wrong with him? Oh god, is there? No, it’s just like Dustin said, he’s just being oblivious to his own feelings. He is in love with El just like everyone else says! Because he’s supposed to be. And therefore he should be. Therefore he has to be. Therefore he is.

You’re probably wondering why I highlighted “Mike skipping school to stay at home”, right?

Well, as I said, that’s where it all starts. It’s the first time Mike ditches Lucas and Dustin to spend time with El. It’s that day that Mike starts to defend El and therefore it’s the reason everyone starts thinking he’s in love with her. And the first scene [so the beginning of the beginning] of Mike showing El around the house [the scene that ends with El on the La-Z-boy] is followed by no other scene than Jonathan driving to Lonnie’s place which contains the flashback of him telling Will:

“You shouldn’t like things just because people tell you you’re supposed to”

That’s literally the next scene after we first get Mike and El spending actual time together!!! It’s already such a queer coded line for just Will, and from then on all throughout the season we also get different people telling Mike that he’s supposed to like El!! But the problem is that Mike never got told that he doesn’t have to like things that people tell him he’s supposed to! He never had that conversation with anyone ever and so Mike doesn’t know that he doesn’t have to be in love with El just because people tell him he’s supposed to. And so of course he lets himself get pressured into behaving like he is in love with her, even though he isn’t.

[gayofthefae]

In a fight with Mike, El begs him to tell her he loves her and calls herself a monster. That fight is not about Mike or their failing romance; it is about her hating herself. It isn't about Mike; she wants it to be from Mike but it isn't about him. She believes that she is an unlovable monster and she just needs someone to tell her "you are not a monster, people have flaws and that is okay. I acknowledge that and still say: I love you." And guess what, her prayers have been answered:

"You speak of monsters and superheroes. That's the stuff of myth and fairytales. Reality, truth, is rarely so simple. People are not so easily defined." "I care[d] for you; I love[d] you."

And it is the most disgusting thing in the show. I have watched scissors in a back, burning flesh, rats explode into goo and eat people's faces. That is the most disgusting thing in the show.

And they know it. Because that's the point. She is disgusted by it. And it causes her to realize what she thought she needed was actually just what she wanted and she doesn't actually need it at all. She is fine without it and she can leave. It is a wake up call for her. And she does just that. She leaves. She leaves knowing her worth and she is lovable enough that she doesn't need him to love her, she can do it herself.

I've talked before about the many usages of "love" leading up to Mike's - Jason to Chrissy, Nancy and Jonathan, Max signing her letter to Billy, Jonathan to Will - but none of those actually matter too much in how it affects his words.

It doesn't matter that other people have already said it. It matters that El has already heard it by the time she gets Mike. And it is exactly what she wanted to hear. And she hated it.

Mike's words mean nothing now. Because if Brenner can say them and believe it, Anyone can. "I love you" is no longer some great feat. It's something you can be wrong about with your whole chest. Because they cracked open the door, made Brenner an easier to swallow gateway and said "Remember: nobody ever said it had to be true. They just said he had to say it."

[gayofthefae]

"The last few days, I've had to think about the last talk we had. You know, before the cops came and the whole world went to shit and everything? I guess, I just, I guess I just wanted to say that-"

This phrasing is him telling her something.

Let me clarify, this phrasing is him setting up information. NOT him setting up a demonstration.

This is "I had to sit with my thoughts and this is what I found" NOT "I had to sit with my thoughts and what they were don't matter, but I can say it now is the important part, look!" The only thing that leads us to believe the climax of his sentence is even coming right there is the music.

If he was even going to say it in that conversation, it wouldn't have been right there. If it had been, he wouldn't have started with "the last few days, I've had to think about the last talk we had". Saying "I've been thinking" is a setup for telling someone what you were thinking about. Not just what those thoughts made you able to do. Not to mention that "I've been thinking" is even a slightly better setup for a demonstration, but he referenced a specific instance, setting up references to details of that memory just like he later does with when they first met. "I've been thinking about the last talk we had and...when I said that [ ]what I meant was that [ ]."

Saying "The last few days, I've had to think about the last talk we had and...I guess I just wanted to say: I love you" is essentially saying "I've been thinking on why I couldn't tell you I love you. I know why now. So....I love you." And then not elaborating on what the reason was.

"The last few days, I've had to think about the last talk we had. You know, before the cops came and the whole world went to shit and everything? I guess, I just, I guess I just wanted to say that...when I couldn't tell you I loved you, it wasn't because of you and it wasn't because I don't. I still think you're amazing with or without your powers/I do love you. I just [etc.]" feels much more logical. "I'm sorry" in this context is information too, not a demonstration of anything. He wouldn't be showing off his ability to say it or a goal achieved, he'd be piquing her interest to an explanation. And this phrasing has nearly even been used by him on her before.

[gayofthefae]

Okay so to recap:

Concern = total self pitying idiot

Meeting that didn't have to happen = it wasn't fate, it wasn't destiny, it was just simple dumb luck

vs

Concern = I'm the only one acting normal here

Meeting that didn't have to happen = it was the best thing I've ever done

...Got it.

[gayofthefae]

Omg and the way "we won't let him" EASILY could have been "I won't let him" with barely any tone change at all. Still protective and the same message. These things could have not been but are is always the basis of my hardest proof.

You vs. We

i rewatched the first shadow yesterday and i think there’s a hentty/byler/mlvn parallel worth noting. (spoilers for TFS ahead⚠️)

when henry is taken by brenner for the first time and brenner asks him to make contact with the mind flayer, patty tries to reach out to him so he lets her into his mind in the void. when she sees him strapped down in the lab, she runs to his side, holds his hand and talks to him. it looks exactly like the way mike’s monologue is framed in s4. and that’s where the similarities end.

patty holds the unconscious henry’s hand, but in the void, she’s still looking at henry when she talks and henry’s looking back at her. she says something along the lines of “if you leave, we can run away and find my mother. we can fight the monster together, you and me.”

and this made me realise the glaring difference between how mike talks to el and how mike talks to will. the entirety of his monologue is “you can do this,” and “you can do that, el!” meanwhile at the end of s4, when will says “we have to kill him,” mike says “and we will. we will.”

(all the gifs used in this post are by @will80sbyers!)

that’s not the only time mike uses “we” or “us” when he talks to will about a fight against the enemy. here are some more examples:

and how he segues into talking about his first meeting with el vs. his first meeting with will:

in his monologue to el, you is el, we is mike, dustin, and lucas.

mike sees el as the other. as someone he cannot imagine as his equal, and it reflects in the way he talks to her. this doesn’t surprise me considering it is exactly what he tells will in the van. but mike and will have had no issues seeing each other as equals. even after mike saw will possessed and powerful. and even though will considers mike the leader of the party, he doesn’t think mike is above him. they stand on equal grounds in their relationship.

[gayofthefae]

Thinking about what Lucas told Mike to do with the "olive branch"

vs what he actually did

And how he changed it so it'd be platonic. The dread comes through in both his performance AND the music in that first shot, but what does he actually do? What he wanted to with the opportunity anyways: be her friend again.

He misses her. He DOES. So when Lucas tells him he has an in to get back together with her, he converts that to an in to get back in her good graces and that's what he makes of it. Lucas implies "get back together with her", he purposefully hears "give her m&m's".

Friends can give each other m&m's. IN FACT. He even references her statement she used (referencing his) in their prior conversation in which she said she DIDN'T wanna get together.

As I think about that I almost wonder if THAT was the olive branch he was offering. "Different species. The romantic time we'd been spending spent with other people instead. Deal. But can we please be friends again too? I miss you."

Remember, it's AFTER this that the I love you comes into play. First watch, to me, this was the resolution for this plot. I remember thinking it was a bit climactic and early, but this was the resolution. The I love you was a separate and new thing, but from this point, they could have gotten back together. They didn't. They could have gotten back together in this moment arguably, and based on/set up by Lucas' words. They didn't.

He felt pressured to get back together with her and he didn't. Then he felt like he was supposed to tell her he loved her and that it was supposed to be romantic and it meant he should get back together with her and he almost succumbed to that one. Then epilogue and we know what happened, of course. But those were two separate plots.

This one was resolved. This one was resolved when they were friends. The "I love you" in how he reacted to it and how it was received was a regression. They had closure here. They were happy.

[gayofthefae]

Thinking about contrasts between how Mike acts around El vs Will. And I don't think he ever calls himself stupid for saying something to Will. He calls himself stupid when he suggests the Snow Ball. He insults himself when he suggests El visiting for Christmas. But even when he tells Will he thinks he's seeing El after she's died, he doesn't even say "it sounds crazy" or anything of the like. Even then, he turns it into something funeral. He isn't anticipating Will's opportunity at calling him crazy, he's actually being further vulnerable. In a moment just like all the others he has with El, instead of saying "it's stupid, I know" etc., he says "sometimes I feel stupid" instead. He communicates his emotions because he trusts Will with them in a way he doesn't anyone else.

When he's with El (and this is about him, not her, of course), he constantly second guesses himself and anticipates her thinking it's stupid (or catching him being 'not normal'). He says he's stupid for the Snow Ball, he says he's stupid for the Christmas gifts, he even calls his bouquet color proportions stupid.

But he never self deprecates with Will. The closest he's ever gotten is essentially saying "you know, I self-deprecate sometimes. I'm sad." The closest he ever gets is instead of offering the opportunity for someone to agree that he's stupid, offering the opportunity for someone to relate to his feelings, even then. "I agree" as a response not meaning "you're stupid" but rather "I've felt stupid before too". An opportunity to make them closer regardless.