#i am wishing you so much luck by the way get that animal gender

[obscure-entity]

The person who responded to that post dumb as hell, YOU get it. My gender is so very much mixed with the fact that Im an animal and its great. Enjoy your gender situation its really awesome.

yeah um. that didnt last very long bc the rb appears to be deleted which is interesting because of how strong they came on. Maybe the tree was too scary

inhumanity as identity is so cool and im going to talk about it as long as i am alive and writing literally anything or producing art. the capacity to admire the world around you, realize that it is not reduced or limited to a heavily-curated human perspective, expanding the narrow socially-imposed standards you started with, and then incorporating it into how you view yourself is really beautiful to me. love is the root of identity

if anyone cares i am like an anole or maybe a mouse or sparrow of some sort and i am nesting in a dense bush to keep myself warm from the rain. But like a girl. and its just one of the few things that makes me actually smile a bit

[blank-and-ocs]

𝖗𝖚𝖑𝖊𝖘 & 𝖎𝖓𝖋𝖔 𝖋𝖔𝖗 𝖙𝖍𝖔𝖘𝖊 𝖜𝖍𝖔 𝖜𝖎𝖘𝖍 𝖙𝖔 𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖆𝖈𝖙 𝖜𝖎𝖙𝖍 𝖒𝖊✍ R.C: you mean us? . *those who wish to interact with us 1: no NSFW stuff here please 2: feel free to interact with oc's however you want in whatever tone you want however each one of them have certain ways to react to certain things 3: most of my oc's aren't from random fandoms however some of them are 4: please don't be a creep when interacting 5:feel free to ask just about anything in the ask box however if you're an anon who wants to ask things frequently please name your anon so i can remember so i can call you something (eg.bunny anon, flower anon) 6: on another note, i'm not okay with any racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia or any of these sorts of things and should you support these and interact with me, i will block you 7: i genuinely have no idea what i'm doing so please bare with me for a while and don't make rude comments

Quick little intro here, i'l be going by the name of Blank, and i am the creator of these ocs aswell as this account and while you can rp with me as you would with my ocs i don't really rp as myself so keep in mind that i won't be popping up as much. i'll just be ramshackle's weird 'vice house warden' who can never be found when needed As you could probably tell by rule 3 i'm in multiple fandoms some of those being Genshin, Twisted Wonderland, Demon Slayer, Apothecary Diaries, HxH and few others, however i've only put ocs in a few fandoms (eg. Twisted Wonderland and Demon Slayer) a list of ocs so far has already been added so feel free to read through that and ask the questions you want feel free to dm me or tag me, i don't bite R.C: we might tho Dest: what she said Ryuco: no biting R.C: awww :( oc's will text similarly as shown above, with their names labled and with a specific colour that matches the fandom (blue: don't belong to a fandom. green: Twisted Wonderland. orange: HxH, Purple: canon characters) (also when i say dragonborn i don't mean them actual canonical dragonborn. in this au, it's similar to dragon fae however dragonborn have more draconic features in their 'human' form and they prefer to be in their dragon form. they also have better control over certain elements and magic according to their species as well as slightly more draconic behaviors and instincts)

𝑶𝒄𝒔 𝒔𝒐 𝒇𝒂𝒓:

𝚁.𝙲 Name: ℝ𝕒𝕚 ℂ𝕙𝕚𝕙𝕚𝕣𝕠 R.C Nicknames: trash panda, racoon Gender: female Species: racoon beastwoman Grade/Class: first year, B-07 Birthday: June 6 Age: 17 Height: 171 cm Dominant hand: right Homeland: ҉A҉҉z҉҉u҉҉r҉҉e҉ ҉E҉҉m҉҉p҉҉i҉҉r҉҉e҉ not of this world Club: mountain lovers club Best Subject: animal languages Hobbies: collecting shiny things, watching and caring for racoons Pet Peeves: boredom/being bored Least Favorite Food: none(?) Likes: racoons, pranks, games Dislikes: long high pitched noises Talent: making jewelry from random things

R.C is a mischievous person who's definitely on the extroverted side trying to get to know those who catch her interest as best as she can. She's a bit of a chaotic person and while those who see her at first don't think she'd be one to get serious, she can and she will when she needs to. How she actually got into school is a mystery since she seemed to have appeared out of nowhere (it caused quite a few rumors that R.C enjoyed hearing for the drama) but she did and now stays at the Ramshackle Dormitory with Yuu(my au) and his friends. She's easy going and doesn't like too much trouble, always with a grinning look on her face that says 'i'm here for the chaos'. Other than that she loves to spend time with her familiar Gremlin, a racoon with a red bandana and very good understanding of human speech. R.C: Ryuco can't find Dest, Yuu(my au) is dealing with the braincell squad and i'm free to play pra- *get lightly hit by Gremlin* Hey! i thought you were on my side!

Dest Name: Dest Cloverfield Gender: female Species: Luck dragon-born Grade/Class: first year, A-09, part time teachers assistant Birthday: May 15 Age: 16 by human calculations Height: 163 cm Dominant Hand: Ambidextrous Homeland: ҉E҉҉n҉҉g҉҉l҉҉a҉҉n҉҉d҉ not of this world Club: none Best Subject: art Hobbies: sleeping, hoarding collecting, drawing, playing around Pet Peeves: loud high pitched noises Least Favorite Food: eggs Likes: clovers, soft things, marshmallows Dislikes: hunters, poachers, dust Talent: acting, playing the kalimba

Despite some seeing her as lazy, Dest is actually very active around certain people she likes. Dest has been best friends with Yuu(my au) and Ryuco since she was little and they've been stuck together by the hip since (Ryuco and Dest had a breakdown when they couldn't find Yuu(my au) when he first came to Twisted Wonderland). She keeps some of her draconic features (eg. scales in certain places, slit pupils, fangs) out instead of hiding them however many mistake her as some sort of dog beastwoman due too the floppy dog like ears and the fluff ended furry tail. Dest is a cinnamon roll who loves being in her full dragon form in her freetime, often going on for a fly around campus or just to sleep more comfortably in the Ramshackle attic (which she had claimed as her 'room'). She has a slightly playful way of going about things like a nervous kitten and feels more at ease around other draconic people be it fae, or dragonborn. Despite looking like a fully capable teenager, Dest is actually still considered a hatchling just barely at fletching stage (meaning she's a child in the eyes of other dragonborn and maybe fae) leading to Ryuco being extremely overprotective when she's out of Ramshackle. Dest: Ugh, we have class already? guess i gotta go hide from Yuu(my au) and Ryuco again...

Ryuco Name: Ryuco Nox Gender: male Species: storm dragonborn Grade/class: second year, E-011 Birthday: November 3 Age: 17-19 by human calculations Height: 195 cm Dominant Hand: right Homeland: ҉E҉҉n҉҉g҉҉l҉҉a҉҉n҉҉d҉ not of this world Club: none Best Subject: PE Hobbies: flying, racing Pet Peeves: leaving cabinets or doors open Least Favorite Food: nothing (for now) Likes: meerkats, cloud gazing Dislikes: very large crowds, loosing sight of Dest Talent: making realistic owl noises, finding Dest

Ryuco is a gentle giant putting on a tough act when in reality he's a big softie around those he cares for. He acts serious quite alot however he tries to be more relaxed and open around those he trusts. He's also basically the other babysitter of the ramshackle dorm students alongside Yuu(my au) and spends the majority of his free time making sure that everyone is behaving and doing well. He doesn't like the idea of leaving Dest alone due to her still being rather young but entrusts her to Yuu(my au) when he has to leave. Similarly to Dest he also prefers to have his draconic features (straight white horns, scaly wing tipped tail, slit pupils) out however having two pairs of wings can cause problems in small spaces. He likes to use his tail to wack students on the head when they annoy him too much. Ryuco: So you wish to know more about the ramshackle students. Well, all i can say is you've come to the right place

Shiloh Name: Shiloh loch Gender: male Species: kelpie Grade/class: second year, C-016 Birthday: April 17 Age: 18 (got held back a year) Height: 178 cm Dominant Hand: right Homeland: ҉E҉҉n҉҉g҉҉l҉҉a҉҉n҉҉d҉ not of this world Shaftlands Club: none Best Subject: P.E Hobbies: swimming, scaring students by pretending to be a normal horse, collecting things Pet Peeves: boredom, people assuming he eats humans Least Favorite Food: nothing (for now) Likes: shells, pictures of water, water, Dislikes: anything that would tie him down. chains, ropes, etc Talent: finding cool things out of nowhere

Shiloh is a person who comes of to people as calm, quiet and well reserved when in reality he can actually get quite cocky and bold when people challenge him. he hates having things tying him down, schedules included, hence the reason he was held back a year. Shiloh, like the Ramshackle students is infact from a different world, more specifically, the world Yuu comes from. However he was transported to Twisted Wonderland earlier, three years having past by in Twisted Wonderland and only a few months having passed by in Yuu's world. He likes to say that he's not as bad as he used to be however he still acts like a possibly over confident colt when people challenge him. He has yet to find anyone who has won against him whether in human form or in his kelpie form. Shiloh has also not yet come across someone who has actually 'broken' him, only having attempts from a few Savannaclaw and Octavinelle students (they all failed).

Shiloh: why do i have such sharp teeth? why do you ask? do they perhaps make you nervous? don't believe every myth that you read, alot of them are false.........you just have to figure out which ones

[grison-in-space]

real sorry for all the new folks following me this week, as I am driven underwater by the weight of lab chaos and have very little energy for much else except sudden hyperfocused text dumps at the moment

hi my bio is about three years out of date, I go long stretches of time posting nothing and occasionally lunge out of the shadows to produce a long and deeply nerdy commentary on some other poor bastard’s years-old OP. I’m not updating the bio. it’s been a long week and I am tired.

that this has finally happened to me is some kind of regretful cosmic irony, especially because it was really quite well described and explained costuming detail work, and I’m mad I don’t have the specialist knowledge to do such a thing half so well as redhorsedawn did.

those of you who are here from the giraffe thing last week, you’re more likely to luck out and get more of that moving forward; I am in fact a working biolo--aw motherfucker probably I’m supposed to call myself a neuroscientist now? ew, fuck that. I’m a behavioral ecologist in a trenchcoat lurking in a neuroscience lab which is pretending real hard that it belongs in the Psychology department of my current institution for funsies. I got a lot of big opinions about biology and animal behavior, and my training and inclination tends to be more on the “how do we understand animals within their own context, and how can we decode their communication and experiences” side of things and not so much the “how can we use animal cognition as a model to understand humans?” side. most of my actual day to day work right now is either coding or ferrying tiny little mice back and forth from their home cages to the place where they get to play video games in exchange for slurps of milkshake. they seem to like that sort of thing. me, I like the coding better, but we’ve been pretty short staffed lately.

I am interested in a bunch of other shit that isn’t so much about animal behavior or brains too in terms of nonfiction and am equally likely to lunge out of the bushes to rave about: sexuality, gender shit, disability, human history and how it relates to these things, human social and community dynamics, asexual community history (motherfucker I was there when we argued about the shade of purple to put in the ace flag; you bring ace exclusionism into my space and I will make fun of you as publicly as I know how) and occasionally how to spot TERFs/why radfem shit is enticing. I do not tolerate TERF shit, and I do not bother with DNIs: my version is that when TERFs reblog my crap I make them wish they had a DNI for me. the thing about posting all my non-fannish stuff to @grison-in-labs is a lie; I always forget what goes to what blog and confuse the streams, so unfortunately the only way to interact with me is to put up with an occasional firehose of content. sorry. I also can’t tag for shit.

those of you who are here from the “no actually Jaskier is a fairly burly dude who merely puts deliberate effort into being perceived as small and non-threatening and fuckable” side of things are--well look my fannish posts tend to be few and far between unless I’m actively trying to riff with someone or interacting. if you want that shit you gotta talk to me and my entire workplace is currently a rolling tire fire, so.... yeaaaaaaah, I’ve been distractable. uh, my partner @coffee-mage-sans-caffeine is writing a big ol’ Witcher fandom novel, and I beta for my buddy @abeautifulblog sometimes. I fear writing fiction myself and generally don’t bother, but I will meta until the cows come home; lob me a fun idea and I’ll chew on it with delight. I can overthink anything. 

generally if you talk to me and are friendly I will talk to you and be friendly back; I do not count followers and will not notice if you read this whole thing and fuck off into the night, but I wanted to let y’all know what you were getting into. again though: I cannot consistently remember tags, I am sorry, but I am rolling in with metaphorical Starbucks--worst fucking nerfed ADHD ever I swear to fuck--and doin’ my best here. I do believe very strongly in de-escalation; if there’s a conflict and you didn’t mean to make one happen, and you try to communicate with me in good faith, I’ll try and listen pretty much every time.

motherfucker, the pizza is burning. should probably eat.

have fun, folks.

[elysianslove]

hi eli bby !! its me vio again shhshf

i loved ur vball player crush hcs w miya twins && suna and can i have that too w sakusa, semi && shirabu ? MY UNDERRATED BOYS CRIES SM <//3 thank u sm <33

hiiiii my love!!! tysm for requesting these boys i love them so much. i hope you like this lysm <3

sakusa kiyoomi 

considering what i’ve seen in the anime, and some manga panels, i really don’t think omi’s a peoples person. so even in school, i doubt he was very involved with other students, and probably kept to himself 

he’s also hyper-aware of his surroundings constantly, including the people around him, so the fact that he noticed you wasn’t a shock

it’s that he noticed you, and then he couldn’t stop thinking about you

probably had some dream about you that same night that cursed him with a crush on you yk the dreams i’m talking about right? 

he still continues to keep to himself, and whenever he spots you from his peripheral vision he just dashes out of there. he realizes that forcing himself to act normally around you might actually improve his situation and help him get over whatever this stupid crush was but he was not taking any chances

he also knew nothing about you, just your last name! 

so anyways both the boys and girls vbc’s are heading the same school, so they got one bus for the both of you and combined them. 

because his general dislike for crowds, omi usually sits out in the front, especially because the door to the bus is right next to him. idk he just seems like the kind to map out an escape plan for every room/vehicle he enters i don’t have a reason why i think so

the game was happening on a weekend, really early, like way too early, so it wasn’t a surprise that you were tired. it’s an unspoken rule that those who sit in the back make a lotta noise and all that, so you opted for the front seats instead to at least try and rest a bit before the game

you don’t sit directly next to him, but there’s only an aisle separating the two of you

because, yk, manners, you give him a small smile before saying, “good morning!” and settling in your seat, your bag between your legs

omi on god freezes up lmfao

he doesn’t mean to sound so rude but it just comes out that way! he says something along the lines of “what are you doing here?” and immediately regrets it after it leaves his lips. he visibly cringes 

but instead of being thrown off, you just laugh, and sakusa curses everything behind his mask because holy shit were you gorgeous and wow was his stomach just somersaulting 

not a nice feeling 

you explain to him briefly that you’re on the vbc and you were heading to play the girls of the same school he was gonna play against and all that, and he just hums and nods and tries to ignore the thump thump thump of his heart 

you don’t really interact during the bus ride going to, it’s coming back that you do 

you tell him that you managed to glimpse the last bit of his game, where he was landing a spike, and you complimented his skills and pointed out his freakish wrist move 

he noted that he didn’t get to see you play and your brain went opportunity! 

you go “well maybe you should come to one of my dates” like the absolute smooth talker you are 

omi just hums and goes “i’ll see” 

absolutely is there lol

the development into a relationship is more implicit than explicit. the two of you don’t announce to the world, but honestly, neither do you do it to yourselves. like you’d been on a coffee date with him at some point and your parent or sibling texted something you found funny and mentioned him as your boyfriend and you showed it to him and he was like

hm

am i your boyfriend 

like idk am i your girlfriend 

he said yeah obviously 

i love this boy so fucking much pleaseeeee

but yes just as your development into a couple is subtle, so is your overall relationship. and honestly? you wouldn’t have it any other way

semi eita

omg pretty setter semi eeee

so yk how shiratorizawa students live in dorms? there’s no way semi hasn’t noticed you before, even if it’s separate dorms for different genders. like you two probably come across each other every once in a while at a vending machine or something, and exchange a word or two 

it’s not until when semi starts to look forward to seeing you, or when he gets disappointed every time you don’t make an appearance, that he realizes, you know, he’s kinda developed a liking to you

he doesn’t really know much about you, aside your name and your favorite go-to snack from the vending machine, so he’s left a little frustrated at the lack of interactions you two have. like he’s just living off that small laugh of acknowledgment and the hi, hope you sleep well! you know? like he wants more from you. he wants to get to know you

he can’t seem to ever see you in school either, because the stars hate him that much and don’t wanna align for the two of you, not even a little to share one class with him. just one

it’s just his luck, though, when a busy weekend for all the sports teams comes along, and each sport is sectioned off to a bus. volleyball boys and girls in one bus, swimming boys and girls in one bus, etc. 

he really doesn’t expect it when you get on the bus, because what the fuck you play volleyball??? and then he really doesn’t expect it when you recognize him, gasp and grin, and wave at him, and go over to sit by him

his brain’s short-circuiting 

you immediately start conversation as you’re setting your bag down like “i didn’t know you played volleyball!”

and he laughs and nods like “i didn’t know you did either” 

it’s honestly a really cute and satisfying moment like okay maybe the stars were just taking their time aligning thank you universe 

the two of you click immediately. like annoyingly so. you have so much in common, and you spend the entire ride chatting excitedly about everything and semi’s wishing he’d just asked you to hang out way sooner, like as early as the first time you’d met at that vending machine 

the girls’ games finish a lot later than the boys, so he comes and watches you play, and is enamored by you, completely. in his head he’s just ‘this girl just keeps growing more perfect.’

he walks back with you to the bus, and sits next to you as well. when you arrive back at the school, you don’t immediately go to your dorms, and he suggests grabbing a refreshing drink from somewhere nearby

it’s incredible how you still have so much to talk about 

the time passes really quick with him

it’s while you’re having that drink with him, probably iced tea or boba or something, he tells you about his small passion for music, and you make him promise to play you something at some point. he loops his pinky with yours :)

he also confides in you about having been replaced on his last year, and how he tries not to let it affect him but he really can’t help him. from then on, after each of your practices, you invite him in your gym, and have him set to you, just so you both have an excuse to spend time with each other, and so that he gets to practice and play the way he really wants to, without any restrictions placed upon him and no one waiting to take his place

i think as a couple you’d probably really bring out the best in each other, and you’re constantly always, always there for each other. really, really reliant and supportive as partners, you know? 

you go to all his games, and whenever he’s pitched in, you scream his name the loudest and cheer him on so much. one look at your face, and he’s reminded of who he is and why he does what he does, and he’s immediately grounded aw <3

shirabu kenjirō

omg shirabu with a crush 🥺🤲🏼 i love it when characters seem so cold and standoffish but as soon as they’re around the people they care about they do a 180. that’s shirabu 100%

he really, really, really liked you. like it was embarrassing at this point. he totally denied it every time anyone even thought it, and he really tried his hardest not to be obvious around you

i like to think he saw you around school and that’s how it developed a little, but maybe you were friends with some of the vbc boys because of your shared interest in the sport, and you come to play with them sometimes after practice, he’d just never be there

but one time you walked in and he was like guess im not leaving 

he was a little starstruck at the fact that you played volleyball. he honestly wouldn’t care, but it sorta felt nice that there really was something that you two had in common

and you were good. at everything. you received semi and ushijima’s serves, and goshiki’s and ōhira’s spikes, perfectly, and reacted to tendō’s blocks so well, and hit his tosses just right. you were incredible. maybe your skills were magnified from his specific lens, but there really was no denying you were skilled 

damn this. all this. 

especially any time you’d spike his toss and give him a really wide smile and say, “nice toss!” like seriously the way his heart’s spasming cannot be healthy what the fuck 

and then he finds out the girls are sharing a bus with them, and then you walk in

and then you walk towards him

obviously, outwardly he looks unimpressed and unfazed but trust, his palms are sweaty as fuck 

before the bus moves, you stand by his seat and make small talk with him about volleyball, before you realize the bus is moving and you have to sit down, but you’re still in the middle of a conversation with him, so you just sit next to him and continue like nothing happened

he just. allows it. 

the school you’d been going to had a really big court where both the girls and boys were playing in the same gymnasium on opposite sides of the court, so when you arrived and changed and all, you were like “wanna warm up together” couple goals <3

pls semi, taichi and tendō would probably tease the fuck out of him lmfao. he’d just glare at them but he has such a big blush on his cheeks as he stretches and warms up with you that the glare is completely ineffective 

you go to sit next to him on the bus ride home, but the day’s exhaustion catches up to you, plus the bus’s movements are lulling you, so you end up falling asleep on his shoulder, and when shirabu first notices that you’d actually fallen asleep, he looks down at you with such a dreamy and awestruck face. goshiki took a picture and likes to torment him with it. shirabu has it as his lockscreen now lol 

as your boyfriend, he’s the exact same. very standoffish to everyone outwardly but to you? it’s a different story. 

nonetheless it’s not very obvious. so yes, he will have a scowl on his face as he tells you off, but his lips are slightly upturned and there’s a little pink shade on his cheeks that show just how endearing he thinks you are 

really loves to practice with you because he loves seeing you in your zone like that. also you look hot

anyways yes he’s such a cutie i will not take criticism 

[silversupremacy]

Can you do leafy or clover headcanons please :)

I can do both

Leafy Sexuality Headcanon: I could see her as bi but with a preference for men Gender Headcanon: Girl with a question mark sound. I don't wanna label her a cis girl but like I don't really have a solid gender concept for her :0 certainly fem leaning but like maybe a demi-girl? A ship I have with said character: I am not too fussed abt shipping w/ leafy. I guess I can say I don't mind Fiery x Leafy cause it's p popular, but I'm really not super into any Leafy ships. Leafy x Pin is cute, I think I saw that before? A BROTP I have with said character: Man, honestly Leafy is a chara I struggle on just cause- she wasn't in bfb much due to getting out early and then when I watched the original bfdi I jsut was struggling through it so I paid no attention to character interactions. But! I do like art with fiery and leafy interacting and hanging out. Like sure its ship art most of the time, but idk, I just like them hanging out. A NOTP I have with said character: Not fussed abt notps for leafy :0 Can't think of anyone I'd actively not want to see with her. A random headcanon: I like making her like, a little leaf bug crossed w/ a kangaroo for my creature design xD And she can just spring away so far, jsut, nyoom. General Opinion over said character: I wiiiiish I could see what everyone sees in her, I wish I found bfdi as a kid before I had highe opinions on animation and writing; But since bfb was my first watch of the bfdi universe, and leafy got out early, I jsut was so confused abt her character? Like ok, she puts up a facade of being nice and she really tries to people please, but then when she comes back later she- just seems different? Like she just turned it down a number of notches. But like, why, what changed in the EXIT that made her more chill. I really do want to like her!! But I just don't really have a solid view on what her character is and it kinda confuses me. Clover Sexuality Headcanon: She likes girls, I struggle to see her with a guy or a generally masc person for some reason Gender Headcanon: Feminine for sure, but I don't think she would care too much abt gender. Maybe she would experiment with some pronouns like bun/bunself or a butterfly type neopronoun. A ship I have with said character: I actually think Clover x TBD is kinda cute just cause cute charas, but I'm not too big on Clover ships? I think she would be neat with a lot of the s2 gals tho :0 A BROTP I have with said character: Her and Nickel's dynamic is fun, I wish we could see Nickel warm up to her cause I like them w/ a sort of sibling style dynamic with Clover being a kind of older sister figure. Would like to see her interact with people like Soap or Salt or Pepper, just curious how that would go. Heck, I think she could take over the world if she met Taco and was convinced, buuuut then she'd see a butterfly and be like Oh ok time to do some wandering :) and jsut leave. A NOTP I have with said character: I hesitantly say shipping her with Nickel; thanks to a youtube map I watched I prefer them as sibling dynamic. So not so much a notp as much as just I would kinda squirm if I saw it but could probably be convinced I guess? A random headcanon: She randomly wanders away from contestant grounds during off time and will just turn up in a town like 50 miles away after 1 hour and no one knows how she got there. She always manages to get back tho. General Opinion over said character: Oooh she's so cute and she's very funny. Her exit interview was probably my fav peak into her character cause she was kinda backhanded? She's like "If I really had my luck I wouldn't be talking to you :) " Like she basically said Pls frick off to her interviewer but in a nice way. I jsut think we didn't see enough of that character side of her in the show. Really wish we could get more Clover content! I'm hoping that ii does something post season 3 like the comics but w/ s3 characters in hotel oj too, just cause I want that interaction content so bad.

[qianoir]

IT3D 2 - Galaga vs. ET

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: college students!WayV x Chinese fem!reader

𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: non-idol au, college au

𝐑𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: 18+ (Do not interact if you are under 18)

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: heavy cursing (censored), mentions of sex, nudity, love octogon, foreign humor, overbearing parents

♡ 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2.2k

𝐓𝐚𝐠 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭: @eggbutnotyolk @d1nne @fanficbitchwhowriteskpop @staysstrays

Preview < 1 < 2 < 3

Your stomach started to churn during the lesson so you pulled out a handful of white rabbit candy from the front pocket of your bag. There was more candy than school supplies in your bag so you generously handed a few each to Xiaojun and Kun, whose empty tummies thanked you greatly. The professor soon closed the lecture and the three of you headed out together.

"I don't suppose either of you guys have dance next?" You ask the two boys with a slight laugh.

Both shook their heads. Kun pulled out his schedule, "I have biology." Xiaojun was searching for something or someone behind you as he spoke, "My next class isn't until 2. I'm gonna go try to find one of my other friends. I'll see you guys later?" Kun and you farewelled Xiaojun’s take off.

"Come on, I'll walk you to the dance studio." Kun offered his arm, which you accepted. "You know where dance class is, but you aren't in it?" Kun shook his head, "One of my friends takes dance, as well. He got so lost this morning, I had to help him find the hall."

"Wow I wish I had a friend like you four hours ago.." You told him, remembering Xuejiao and her useless a.ss. Kun smiled, "He should still be in there. He has like 3 dance classes mixed in his schedule." You took note of this and unlinked your arm from Kun's as he delivered you to the dance hall. "Thank you for walking me."

"No problem. I'll catch you around. Good luck!" Kun waved good-bye as you walked into the studio. Immediately, you were hit with shocking sound waves and saw a few very skilled dancers performing some contemporary urban routine. You walked along the far wall to the back corner of the room to put your stuff down then unpacked your dance clothes and walked into the dressing rooms.

Dressing rooms in China are usually very strictly organized to separate genders. The room you walked into did not clearly decipher what gender it was made for, so you could only hope you chose the correct one. You turned a corner housing unoccupied lockers and.. a man fully clothed in ballet attire.. thankfully. The beautiful Asian man looked up from fixing his tights.

"I'm so sorry I thought this was the women's dressing room!" You stuttered, blushing in uncomfy embarrassment.

The man chuckled at you and stood up straight. "You're fine. Everything on this campus is co-ed." He said with a small eye roll. "Oh.. that's a little.. discomforting.." You said, dragging your eyes to the floor to avoid staring at the beautiful man's beautiful body.

He pointed to your dance clothes. "You're taking ballet?" You nodded. "So am I. The class is about to start.. you should get ready quickly." He walked past you, out into the studio.

The strange encounter gave you chills. You wondered if he was the friend Kun mentioned. After all, he was the fourth Asian guy you had seen today. Am I just like a magnet for cute Asian boys?

Taking his advice, you quickly got dressed and slipped out into the dance room where the instructor was already giving his new term speech. You tried to attract as little attention as possible as you walked to sit in an empty space on the floor, which was a little further ahead from the boy you previously met.

"So enough about myself, let's go around the room and have each of you introduce yourself and tell us about your dance background. Starting with blondie over there." The instructor points to a pretty girl with dyed blonde hair.

"Hi, I'm Hyo Yeon Kim, I'm from Incheon, South Korea and I have been dancing mainly hip hop since I was seven years old."

The class claps and this continues for every student. Then it's his turn. He sits up straight and waves around the room as he introduces himself.

"Hi, I'm Sicheng Dong. I'm from Wenzhou, China and I have specialized in traditional Chinese dance since I was 10 years old."

So Sicheng is his name..

Suddenly, the studio door bursts open with a petite Asian boy panting like he just ran the Great Wall.

"S.. sorry.. I'm late.. I slept through the alarms.. I never set." The boy fixes his dance clothes which were thrown carelessly over his body.

"That's ok, son. Come in and introduce yourself and tell us about your dance history." The instructor motions for him to join the group. The boy suddenly has so much energy and brightly greets us, waving his hand high in the air.

"Hi everyone!! My name is Chittaphon “Ten" Leechaiyapornkul! I'm from Bangkok, Thailand and I have been dancing since the womb!!" Everyone laughs at his personality, except Sicheng, who just rolls his eyes, but still smiles at the bubbly boy. Ten takes a seat on the floor next to Sicheng who offers him a hi-five. I guess all the Asians keep it tight here, huh?

"We're almost done, you there, go ahead." The instructor points to you and you straighten your spine before speaking.

"Hi, I'm Y/N. I'm from Hong Kong and I have been dancing contemporary ballet since I was eight years old."

"Very good, Y/N. I think you will fit in nicely with our ballet class." The instructor nods at you before addressing the whole class, "Right, so we will continue to get into actual dancing in the next class. Thank you all for showing up, even if not on time." Everyone turns to Ten who just smiles cheekily in return. "Class dismissed."

You pick yourself up from the floor and decide to wait until everyone has changed to change yourself, since the idea of co-ed dressing rooms still doesn't sit well in your mind. While you wait in the corner, Ten and Sicheng walk towards you.

“Y/N, right?" Ten asks. "Yes, that's me." You smile. "We should hang out sometime! We have a whole clique of native Chinese friends you could be a part of."

"Actually I think I may have already met some of them. Do you know Dejun Xiao and Kun Qian?"

Ten nods enthusiastically. "Wow small world! I'll add you to a group chat with all of us. Give me your phone!" Ten takes your phone from your hands and starts typing your number on his own. The device is suddenly buzzing with new message notifications as it is returned to your hands.

"I can't be late to my next class- we can meet up later! See you, Y/N!!” Ten rushes out of the studio, leaving you and Sicheng alone in the corner.

"Sorry if he scared you. He can be a bit hyper." Sicheng says with a small grin. You wave him off, "It's fine. You should go change now."

"Are you waiting for me to change so you can be alone in the dressing room?" You stay silent. "If you've been taking dance classes since you were eight, you should learn that going out of your comfort zone is essential." Sicheng teases, but offers another option, "There is a better place to change if you're that uncomfortable with it, come on."

Sicheng leads you into the dressing room where you are met with various colors of boobs and a.ss cracks. You just look up and let Sicheng guide the rest of the way. You hear him giggle at your flushed face. You arrive at a spatial closet that is filled with hi-tech film equipment. "This is one of the theatre storage closets. Xiaojun and I hang out here a lot."

Sicheng looks around the room while you stand there, bag in hand and ready to change. His eyes land on you awaiting awkwardly in front of him and he realizes, "Oh sorry! I'll leave you to change." Sicheng apologizes and rushes out of the closet. You laugh at the quirkiness of the cute boy and start getting dressed up again.

Walking out of the storage closet, you see Sicheng waiting in the empty dressing room. He holds up your schedule as he notices you coming out. "You dropped this and I couldn't help but see you're free for a couple of hours. I was wondering if you wanted to get lunch with me and the rest of the guys in the group chat Ten added you to? My treat." He says, handing back your schedule.

You stuff the paper back into your bag, "I would love to."

"Awesome. Let's go."

The two of you walked around the campus and met up with five other Asian guys by the sculpted fountains, three of them being Xiaojun, Kun, and Ten. Xiaojun and Kun noticed you immediately. "Hey nice to see you again. I see you've met Winwin and Ten." You look at Xiaojun confused. "Winwin?"

"That's my nickname." Sicheng blushes. "You can call me 'Win.' It sounds manlier." He puffs his chest a little.

“Y/N, this is Lucas and Hendery. Hendery is from Macau and Lucas is from Hong Kong, like you!" Kun introduced you and Lucas gave you a hi-five, "Waaah what's up, little Hong Konger!?" You laugh as his hi-five pulls you into a bro-hug, where your face painfully smacks into his hard chest. "It's been a while since I've met someone from my hometown. What are you doing in America?" Lucas asked you.

"My parents wanted me to attend an Ivy League to become the best doctor in Hong Kong, so here I am with painful irony." You answered. "Cool, cool. I'm studying animal biology. I love animals, especially puppies."

"You are a puppy!" Ten calls out and everyone agrees. "We actually have a dog and two cats hidden in our dorm, but don't tell the DA." Lucas puts a finger to his lips.

"GUYS LOOK WHAT I JUST SCORED! THEY'RE GIVING OUT FREE CONDOMS!!"

The annoying, orange-haired, Taiwanese kid from your chem class ran to all of you with like 20 unopened condoms in his hands. All of the guys facepalmed and you just rolled your eyes at more of his immature behavior. Yangyang’s eyes fell on you and hid all of the condoms behind his back as he screeched, "What the hell guys!? Why did you invite a chick to hang out with us?? We can't have a girl knowing our manly secrets!"

"B!tch, you and I both know those aren't going to fit your 5’8” a.ss." You motioned to the golden X-tra large rubbers hiding behind his back. The guys except Yangyang laughed when his face started turning red, proving the accuracy of your assumptions.

"You two know each other?" Asked Xiaojun. "We have a.. history." Yangyang narrowed his eyes at you, stuffing the condoms into his backpack without breaking visual contact. "Get over yourself. We only met this morning." You scoffed. The young boy stuck his tongue out at me like he had done once before.

"Let's go eat. I'm starving." Hendery groans.

The group walks to the dining hall where different restaurants are catered to the students and staff. It was decided to eat at a Hawaiian rooftop grill. You sat near the edge with a great view of Manhattan. Winwin sat on your right with Lucas and Kun next to him. Xiaojun sat across from you with Hendery and Yangyang on his side, and Ten at the front of the long table. You looked over the menu placed in your hands.

"Get whatever you want, ok?" Win told you and you complied with thanks. The guys ordered a bunch of food for the table as well as for themselves; you ordered a simple ahi tuna poke bowl.

Upon the food’s arrival, Kun starts a conversation. "How is everyone's first day going?"

"My professor hit my wrist with a ruler because I said Galaga sucked." Yangyang answered. "You had it coming. You think ET: The Video Game should have made a comeback." Xiaojun attacked.

"None of you fools gave ET a chance." Yangyang crossed his arms and looked away.

"My calc professor ate an egg and bacon biscuit from Tim Hortons, then fell asleep." Win said as he stuffed his cheeks with macaroni salad.

"Did he ever wake up?" You wheezed and asked him.

"No."

"Hendery what's on your neck?"

"He got that good-good on the first day- my man!" Yangyang said with his cheeks full.

"Some kid in my aerophysics class launched a bottle rocket into my neck. It really hurts." Hendery replied, rubbing the sore area.

"D.amn."

...

"This dude in my psych class kinda packing no homo." Everyone groaned at Xiaojun’s comment, Ten just smiled and beamed him up.

Everyone finished eating and you offered to pay for yourself, but Winwin wouldn't allow it. You all walked back to the fountains you had met up. Yangyang, Hendery, and Kun left for their next class together. "What do you have next?" Win asked you. "I have biology." You replied.

"Oh you're with us!" You looked over at Lucas and Ten. Turning back to Winwin, "I'll see you later. Maybe we could have a movie night sometime this week, just you and me?" He proposed. "Sure. That sounds fun. Also thank you for buying me lunch, it was yummy." Win smiled at you. "No problem. I'll text you tonight." You nodded and parted ways with the lovely boy who walked with Xiaojun- the other lovely boy.

You walked off with the three Chinese boys, not looking forward to biology, but glad to spend the hour with your cool new friends.

To be continued…

*DA = dorm advisor

𝘲𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘪𝘳

[zedwards]

MOVIE DATES WITH STRAY KIDS

stray kids x reader

genre: fluff

word count: 1.8k

warnings: intended for male reader, but can be read as gender neutral; my first fic 👉👈 im nervous; lowercase aesthetic; does “bastard” count as a swear word..?

i hope you enjoy this little gift :)

bang chan

he likes romantic comedies

tbh being chan’s s/o would feel like a romcom of its own

since he doesn’t like crowds, your movie dates together usually wouldn’t involve actually going to the movies

instead you’d probably both opt to stay in for the night and watch a movie on the couch

under multiple blankets

in each other’s arms

hugs and cuddles

with the occasional kiss on the top of your head

it’s so soft

it’s chan :)))

he does the little claps at the end of the movie

because happy endings ^–^

y’know those awkward scenes where the main couple meets for the first time?

he likes to point out which character you were most similar to when the two of you first met

“i didn’t know you were in this movie!”

“you look so different! i could hardly recognize you!”

he’s such a dork

all your movie nights would end in one of three ways:

1.) you falling asleep in his arms

2.) him falling asleep holding you close (yeah not really, this man doesn’t sleep that much T_T)

or 3.) you both make it through the movie, and one of you says something like

“this is nice...i wish we could just stay like this”

and so you both (in theory) fall asleep right where you are

either way, chan is the best boyfriend and neither of you know what you did to deserve each other

lee know

he’d get you to go see a horror movie

even if you protest, he’d manage to convince you somehow

pokes fun at you every time you get scared

during a suspenseful part in the movie, he’d suddenly put his hands on your shoulders and shake you (lightly) out of nowhere, just to startle you

and he’d have to stifle his giggles because your reaction is just too priceless

absolutely relishes in how you never let go of his arm

like ever

seriously, his arm might as well be an extension of your body at this point

he may act like he’s annoyed

but he loves it

cuz he knows it’s because you feel safe with him

and if you hide your face in the crook of his neck

he’d get this look on his face...

something between an evil smirk and an amused grin

why? because his plan is working

plot twist: the whole reason he chose to see a horror movie with you was so that you would cling to him

surprise!! >:]

but even if you catch on, he’ll never admit it

tsundere

“did you even see any of the movie?”

you just kinda grumble in response, still latched onto his arm

“i can’t believe it... i so generously paid for your ticket, only for you to hide your face the whole ti- OW!”

you jab him in the side with your elbow give him a “love tap” :)

but it’ll take more than that to get him to stop teasing you about it

he’s a cocky bastard but you love him to death for it

seo changbin

superhero movie!!!

like something from the mcu

seeing him get so excited/invested in the movie??

wholesome

but he might get a little too excited

in other words, going to the movies with changbin is an...interactive experience

meaning that he talks at the movie

not to the movie, but at the movie

like...he talks at the characters on screen

as if they can hear him

honestly it’s kinda cute

but occasionally you have to remind him to keep his voice down

“HE TRIED TO TELL YOU NOT TO TOUCH THE STONE”

“shhhh alright calm down a bit-”

“...AND NOW YOU DEAD”

“changbin i love you but please don’t get us kicked out of the theater”

10/10 would have his arm around you throughout the movie

even if his arm goes numb, he’d refuse to let anything stop him

“changbin, you don’t have t-”

“CUDDLES.”

lowkey feels like a pillow

bc he beefy

on very rare occasions he might fall asleep during the movie

if he does end up dozing off and you catch him in the act, he’d deny it profusely

he likes to spontaneously slip his hand into yours :)

and lace your fingers together :))

you’re holding hands now :)))

his presence is just so warm and fuzzy and you make each other so happy

hwang hyunjin

THIS MAN

the funnest(?) most fun bf in existence

he’s definitely the type to try and smuggle outside food into the theater

he insists that he’s inconspicuous about it

and he tries to be

but he’s not :)

“uh... hyunjin, why are you wearing two hoodies?”

“i uh... i’m... cold?”

“so you’re sticking bags of microwaveable popcorn in between your sweatshirts...to keep warm?”

*visibly sweating* “i can explain...”

ok ok

so y’all seeing a comedy

why?

because HIS LAUGH OMG

it’s so bubbly and contagious

so naturally, you’d both be laughing up a storm at the back of the theater

and sometimes it’s because of the movie

but most of the time it’s because of the side comments the two of you keep making to each other

and it doesn’t help that he keeps making these ridiculous observations about the characters in the movie

“what’s up with that guy?”

“what about him?”

“why is he built like a refrigerator?”

about halfway through the movie, you both reach that delirious state where literally anything and everything becomes funny

even if it’s not supposed to be funny

...especially if it’s not supposed to be funny

the two of you? lowkey hyenas

long story short, you’re both asked to leave the theater not even two hours into the film :)

han jisung

action!! movie!!

finishes the popcorn within the first ten minutes of the film

that is, if he doesn’t scarf it all down during the previews

he talks through the entIRE THING

he’s always got something to say

it’s like watching the director’s commentary version of a movie

but instead of the director talking about the film-making process

it’s jisung muttering nonsense in your ear

sometimes pertaining to the movie

and other times...

“hey did i ever tell you about the time i saw a seagull eating garbage?”

...yeah, other times it’s...not

either way, you don’t mind

because you aren’t really paying much attention to the movie anyways

you’re too busy admiring your boyfriend

how could you not?

the way he’s on the edge of his seat, giving the movie his full attention...

the light from the screen flickering dimly on his face, highlighting his gentle features...

you’re the luckiest person in the world, no doubt

his eyes light up whenever something particularly cool/badass happens in the movie

but he also gets startled by the explosions every now and then

when that happens, you just look at each other for a moment

and then burst into a fit of giggles

“stoooppp!! it was loud, ok??”

you just hum in response and rest your head on his shoulder

y’know that thing he does where like...

he’s giggling, but he has something he wants to say, so he keeps trying to talk?

but his words keep getting cut off by his own laughter?

yeah... that’s what he’s doing

he’s adorable

lee felix

animated movie

a firm believer that you’re never too old to enjoy cartoons

he never lost that child-like energy/enthusiasm, which is part of what makes him such a gem

so of course, when the new disney movie came out, he knew he had to go see it with you

he would definitely load up on snacks from concessions

if you don’t stop him, he’s gonna be buying two giant things of popcorn and at least five different kinds of candy

and when he walks back to you after paying, he’d just smile brightly from behind the mountain of junk food in his hands like

“snacks :D!!!!!”

seriously though, try to keep track of how much popcorn he eats

bc he might overeat and get a stomachache :((

obviously he can take care of him self, cuz he’s an adult

but like

he loves when you look out for him

because he knows just how much you care about him

sunshine boy :((

y’all already know how much of a cuddle bug this man is

so of course that means lots of cute, affectionate gestures during the movie

skinship

holding hands

you resting your head on his shoulder

and him resting his head on top of your head

and most importantly SNUGGLES

snuggles are a must

for him, movie dates are just an excuse to be extra touchy with you

even though he never needs an excuse to get cuddles whenever he wants

because c’mon

it’s felix

what are you gonna do, say no?

kim seungmin

murder mystery film

tends not to talk all that much during movies

he’d just be so completely engrossed in the movie that he’d forget about his surroundings

but that’s not to say he won’t hold your hand or drape his arm over your shoulders

every now and then you can catch him leaning forward in his seat

with his mouth slightly ajar

it’s so endearing

but if for whatever reason you want to get his attention...

heh...

yeah, good luck with that

you’d have to maybe give his hand a lil squeeze to get his attention

and at first he’d just turn his head in your direction, keeping his eyes glued to the movie

but if you gave his hand another squeeze, he’d snap out of it

“psst...seungmin”

“mm.”

“hey, seungmin?”

“huh? yeah?”

“i love you”

if that doesn’t make his heart SWELL—

his dazed expression would quickly shift into one of pure elation and fondness

he might not respond verbally

but he’d gently bring your hand up to his lips

press a soft kiss atop your knuckles

and then lower your hand again without letting go, turning his attention back to the movie

but that bright smile of his would never falter for even a moment

he loves you too

so so much :)

yang jeongin

another one for romantic comedies

he likes it when there’s a little less “rom” and slightly more “com”

and so do you

because it means you get to hear his laugh more

oh god...

his laugh

the little giggles in between the short gasps for air...

so cute

“no. i’m not cute.”

he is very cute

probably won’t initiate any skinship

but if you do, he will absolutely go along with it

sometimes he’ll nod off in the middle of a movie

and then wake up during the credits, completely disoriented

“where am i”

“you fell asleep”

“huh??”

“you drooled a little on my shoulder, you goof”

unlike hyunjin, he’s really good at sneaking food into the theaters

like really really good

almost to the point that it’s scary

usually people try to sneak in popcorn or candy or maybe soda

well not jeongin

“hey, you want some?”

“what the- HOW DID YOU GET A BUCKET OF FRIED CHICKEN IN HERE”

“:]”

he’s not telling

like or reblog if you enjoyed ^^ feedback is always welcome and very much appreciated!

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: January 28th, 2021 (Part 2)

Here we’ve got asks that aren’t to ask a question but are just really nice messages. Thank you all for sending us such kind comments ;v;. It’s seriously heartwarming to see so many people having good experiences with the game. I don’t even know what to say to such sweet responses.

We’ll keep doing our best and thank you again to each and every one of you for giving Our Life a chance ❤!

Hello! I've been following this account and have been following the development of 'Our Life' for a few months now, and I just wanted to say thank you for all your hard work and dedication you have put into the game. It astonishes me how much choice you have during the sequence of Our Life and am excited to play the full version now, I am downloading it as I write this message. I've had a great time seeing the demo transition into to the full game and just wanted to write two words. Thank you.

Anhhhhffbgdfbhujk!!! Congratulations on the release, I’m playing the game right now! Thank you all for your hard work and I can’t wait for the Step 3 DLC to come out, I’ll probably wait for the Step 3 DLC to come out to experience everything, but until then, I still have a lot to play. Thank you once again!

finished my first playthrough just now. it just felt so wholesome ??? 100/10 would do it again. i laughed. i cried. i got angry. i felt second-hand embrassment— i got so into it i was left in literal tears after getting my first ending. the art, the storyline, the music, and COVE HOLDEN– UGH IT WAS LITERAL PERFECTION ❤ THE WAIT WAS WORTH IT. THANK YOU FOR MAKING SUCH AN AMAZING GAME 🥺😭 this made my 2020 better, i can't wait for step 4 in 2021 ❤❤

So I was following you guys on itchio for years and uhh did I stay up til 6 am on a school night to finish the game? Yes. Did I sob my eyes out during step 3 as a 20 year old having doubts about life and adulthood? Absolutely. I can't form proper sentences right now due to lack of sleep but just wanted to say thank you for making it. I honestly feel lighter and I feel like it changed my views on future to be more optimistic... I can't wait to replay it! Thanks again!

I love how Our Life turned out!! I keep replaying it and can't stop squeaking and giggling!! Thank You for creating it ♥

okay i have actually fallen in love with cove and cannot WAIT to marry him 😭

Hi! I played through 'Our Life' yesterday and  I just wanna say how refreshing it was to be able to have Cove be 'high initiative' and also have so many opportunities to initiate affection from the player character! As a pretty flirtatious/affectionate person myself, I notice that a lot of VNs don't give players that agency, and affection can be kinda 'carrot on a stick' if that makes sense. You guys did an awesome job! I look forward to seeing if there are more of those moments in Step 3 & 4 :)

I have to say I was pleasantly surprised by the option to choose Cove's level of initiative in step 3! As much I love the option to choose I personally enjoy have the romanced character take the lead without my input so when I got to step 3 and had to option to make it so that Cove initiated affection without as much input from me I was really happy! You guys seriously added so much freedom in terms of choices, it's almost baffling that the only thing you have to pay for is optional DLC!

I absolutely loved everything about the game and I really want congratulate the team for making the game such a satisfying experience.

I look forward to step 4

❤️❤️❤️❤️

* and sorry for my bad English

Just finished my first play through and I loved it! I've been looking forward to the game and it definitely was worth the wait. Thank you all for your hard work and can't wait for the extra dlc!

Till then, hope you guys gets some well deserved rest���

Love you guys, thank you so much for your hard work. :)

Ok, so I just finished Our Life and, wow. I have never cried at a video game before, ever. Thank you so, so much! Its one of my favorites.

this isn't a question, but i just wanted to say how much i enjoyed our life 🥺 i've been patiently looking forward to the full game for a few months now, and i couldn't be happier with it! i've only played through it once so far but the outcomes of the choices i made were all so soft and wholesome 💗 i can tell that everyone who was involved really worked hard and you all did an incredible job! i can't wait to see what else is in store 👍

i’d just like to say how addictive our life is!!! i constantly played it during quarantine and now playing the full release is so amazing to me!! i love that i’m still discovering dialogue bits with different personalities and actions!!! i have to admit that i’ve been wishing the day to pass faster all day during school so i could go home and play again. mentally i’m not the healthiest and our life being released has boosted it up so much, thank you for creating such an amazing game!!!!!

Hey, I just wanna say I played our life two times and it still give me the same feelings. I was really looking forward to this game before it came out and I kept on replaying the demo. This game is such an amazing experience and I feel so happy playing it. I am not really a person good with words unfortunately but I do honestly love this more than anything in the world. Thank you for making it and I hope that you will continue to make more games like our life. This game really makes me happy and I can't thank you enough

Just wanted to say that Our Life really made me feel seen as an 18 year old trans man who's been struggling with change as of late and I can't thank you guys enough for it. I just finished the main story and currently released DLC's and gosh, I can really only say... woah. Just, woah. The messages are somehow exactly what I needed to hear right now, and they brought me a lot of comfort in this really weird and confusing time in my life. Can't wait to see what comes next in this lovely story <3

I am honestly in love with Our Life. The graphics, the soundtrack its just *chef's kiss* It was so worth the wait for it. I can't wait for step 4. Keep up the good work GB Patch!

good people i have just finished Our Life and let me say, it was beautiful. rarely have such non-fantastical moments (and even some fantastical moments) brought me to tears like this game has, and i don't even have the dlc (yet). i don't know how you did it but it felt like i was playing a slice of life anime. i had waited with baited breath to play this since i played the demo and my expectations were not just met but surpassed. from the bottom of my heart thank you for this game

I found the game by chance and I am so so glad I did. It’s so inclusive and made me feel so incredibly seen. Seeing that my gender identity and sexuality were possible just meant the absolute world to me. I’ve never seen something like this and it just made me so incredibly happy. Thank you for the absolutely amazing game and I can’t wait to see what’s next.

Hello! I downloaded Our life earlier this week and I'm only now getting the chance to play it (Very busy and stressful week) I'm so excited to play and I wanna say thank you for making this adorable game!

I just finished my first playthrough of Our Life and I can't even express how much I love it. Cove is absolutely precious and has killed me several times, and the art and soundtrack is beautiful. I love all the small different choices. I'm very interested in the Derek and Baxter DLCs and the rest, can't wait!!!!!!

thank you for "Our Life Beginnings & Always" it has to be one of the best visual novels i ever have played and i just dont want it to end (i know it will, but damn it! i want to have a wedding night, have children and die of old age with cole! XD) when i play it it always makes me tear up (in a good way) and i am most definetly going to buy all the dlc that you make! thank you for this lovely game and all the work that went into it! (ps: i also loved "lake of voices" )

You guys are incredibly talented and im very proud of you all! You've really outdone yourselves w/ OL and i cant wait to see whats next to come for you all :)

i really love that you can be trans in Our Life! not a lot of games do that so i just wanted to say thank you!

Guuyyss!! I just wanna say! Thank you sm for the headscarf option in the MC creator! I especially loved that little detail where MC quickly slips the headscarf on before greeting Cove, I've never felt so immersed :'D Not that the rest of the game wasn't immersive btw, but since I wear my hijab most of the time that little addition really felt like something I would do! So thank you for that <3

I've been watching "Our Life: Beginnings & Always" development for quite some time, and I gotta say its wild to see it finally release. Its so unique in the way relationships work- even character creation. I've cried multiple times over this game while playing. I can't thank y'all enough for a game with these kind of mechanics, and representation. its rare I get to feel im really playing as myself in games like these. Everyones outdone themselves. this'll certainly be one I keep coming back to.

I've been following the development of Our Life from way back when the first demo dropped and it still blows my mind how many choices and customizations there are (love that update for the MC's bedroom btw!) and the fact that the game remembers them - it really feels like your very own coming of age story! I was so immersed I cried at the end :') Can't believe I experienced this game for free lol. I can't wait for future DLCs and Step 4! Good luck with all your upcoming projects dev team!!

Just wanted to say I love Our Life and I'm thankful it exists. Thank you so much! I love the little world you created and all the people in it. Especially Cove! This game makes me so happy!

Just poping in to say hi and that ilu guys ^^, remember to take care of yourselves!

Hi!! I just wanna thank you for creating such an amazing game. Our Life is one of the few dating sims I’ve found that let’s me be a male mc, it’s really hard to find dating sims that let me be gay. Our Life is my new favorite dating sim to just sit down and playthrough whenever I’m having a bad day so I just wanted to let y’all know how much I appreciate all you’ve done. 🤍

Fan from australia here

Just wanted to reach out and let you know how important this game has been to me. I came across it at a really rough time ( that I’m still going through ) and it’s been one of the things that’s driven me to get up and out of bed sometimes.

This game and cove both hold a very special place in my heart and I can’t wait to see more of him in the DLC and Step 4

Much love ♥️

I know this isnt exactly the main focus of the game, but i really love how we can customise the mc personality wise! This is the first time i've played a game like this where the mc actually does and says exactly what I would do and say in certain situations and its such a breath of fresh air!! It's also so cool how the other characters can pick up on it!!

Cove Holden saved 2020 (my 2020 anyways) I would die for him

Sorry for this being out of the blue, but after playing through Our Life I wanted to thank you for the experience. I don’t know if I’ve ever played a game that has made me cry happy tears TWICE lol. It’s beautiful, scenic, inclusive, and absolutely amazing..have a great rest of 2020 and I honestly cannot wait for the rest of it :,) (ps. The ending song is stuck in my head)

I think you guys might've ruined visual novels for me forever. I'm not sure I'll be able to play another without comparing it to Our Life and I know if I do that I'll be disappointed every time because of how amazing it is. I bought the DLCs before playing the base game it's one of the best impulsive purchases I've ever made

Thank you so much for making our life! It's my favorite visual novel ever and I just can't articulate how much being able to just be honest with my responses instead of going for whatever would make the love interest happy means to me? I reccomended it to evry friend I have that plays visual novels because this is the best one I've ever played!

Just wanted to say that I absolutely adore this game! The childhood friends tropes is my favorite thing and this game delivers! Cove is the sweetest thing, infact all the boys are good boys. Super excited for all upcoming dlcs!

Hi, I just want to thank you for making such an amazing game like Our Life. Tbh, I was following the game’s development for a while, but me and my family moved away from my childhood town just a few days before release, so I really connected to this game. You all did amazing!

hey just wanted to know that i completely loved ol: b&a and it was so good and love cove more than i’ve liked any fictional character, it’s now my comfort media. thank you so much

hi i just wanna say i really enjoyed all of the representation in our life b&a! there were characters with a lot of different body shapes, pic characters, lgbtq+ characters, and you get to choose your own pronouns and sexuality!!! so tysm!!

This isn't a question, I just wanted to say that Our Life is incredible. Ever since I finished it, I've been looking for other visual novels to play so I don't play OL so often that I start memorizing the lines before all the DLC comes out, but I keep coming back to it. It's really one of a kind, I think you all ruined other visual novels for me because I haven't enjoyed another VN like I have this one since I read it ❤.

i think our life b&a is the first game where i felt like cove loved me, not the character i play as which is really nice for someone with kinda low self esteem so THANK YOU

I’ve been playing Our Life practically nonstop since yesterday. I just want everyone who worked on it to know how much the LGBTQ inclusivity means to me. As a closeted trans ace guy in an unsupportive household, I can’t emphasize how much of a comfort this game has been to me. Everything about it is so wholesome and heartfelt. I’m excited to see what other games you make in the future 💙

- A demibiromantic ace transgender man who may or may not have cried over the option to be myself in a game for the first time ever

Csn i just say i really appreciate how you handled MC deciding to use they/them at different stages. Mainly because alot of games don't pay much attention to the body the mc was assigned at birth if they player chooses nonbinary like it does with male/female. And it was just nice to be able to play an mc who just thought gender was kinda 'meh' for them but still felt good about the body they were born with (like myself). I guesd it boils down I'm really appreciative of the hard work it must've taken for you to make all those options possible & still have them matter.

I just wanted to thank you all for Our Life. My mental health hasn't been in a good place recently and it has become my favorite form of escapism/way to cheer up. It's idyllic setting and fantastic characters are such a good way to wind down, I love it. Also, I've been dreading 2021 due to classes starting and general stress, but the DLC and your next project have given me something to actually look forward to :). I'm so excited for them and now I actually have a reason to be happy that it's 2021. Sorry if this message is a bit weird, I just wanted to thank the team for their hard work and for creating something so incredible <3

I've gotta say this is one of the most repayable games I've ever played, if not the most. Usually after i do a playthrough or two of a game i have to wait awhile before playing again otherwise it feels stale. But i haven't had that problem with our life because of the sheer ammount of player agency. Everyone who works on tbe game should feel incredibly proud of themselves because you've created something amazing.

I just wanted to say thank you for Our Life. I'm sure you get this a lot, but it really pulled me out of a mentally tough spot in my life. So thank you.

who needs therapy when you have our life: beginnings and always? haha no but seriously this game is my comfort game, and even though i can’t join your patreon at the moment please know i am always supporting you and i am so excited to see everything you have in store! everyone who works on the games is so so talented

All DLCs have nice content. 😡😡

And I love them all!!💗💗💗💖💖💖💕💕💕

[donutloverxo]

Stevie

Authors note- listen... I'm sorry for this but at the same time I'm not. Anyway this was inspired by an arc from the anime gintama.

the female captain america graphic does not belong to me.

Do not repost or steal my works. Reblogs are welcome

Summary- Steve has been on a space mission for a week. When he gets back he's a completely different person.

Pairings- Steve Rogers x reader, Stevie x reader

Warning- smut, sex toys, bi curious reader, gender bender(Tony nat and steve get turned into the opposite sex)

Word count- 3.3k

Masterlist

You had been monitoring Steve’s mission status for the past week. You were both used to the other being gone on missions. But a mission in space was something else. Steve, Tony and Nat were helping Carol out with a situation in space. Since the guardians were mia. In another galaxy. It was still hard to wrap your head around. Last you heard going to Mars was considered a huge accomplishment now people are travelling to another solar systems.

It was hard not to worry. So many things could go wrong. They could be sucked into a black hole or encounter a hostile species. You were one of the few Avengers who had never been to space. As you were blipped after the snap.

You had heard about it from Steve. He had a far away melancholic look in his eyes whenever he talked about it. You understood how hard those five years must’ve been for him. You weren’t sure if you could even last 5 weeks without him.

As much as you would’ve liked to go explore space you had decided someone had to stay home.

You were going about your night drinking some coffee to help with your fatigue in front of the monitor waiting for updates from Steve’s team. You had not left the room, you pretty much lived there. They were supposed to be home two days ago. With no updates from either of them you were at the end of your rope.

You were jolted awake when you felt your chair along with the whole room vibrating. You didn’t even realise you had fallen asleep. You rushed outside hoping that the team had made it back.

You looked at Carol approaching you from the ship landed on the compound lawn.

“Hey there”, she greeted giving you a nervous smile.

“Is something wrong?”, you asked looking at the ship hoping to see Steve come out of it.

“Well yes and no. Something happened. I’m going to need you to stay calm.”

“I’m always calm”, impatient you walked towards the ship.

You stopped in your tracks when you see three more people come out of it. Two women and a man. Confused you looked back at Carol who just smiled and shrugged.

“This must be weird for you”, you heard the man say, his hoarse deep voice say.

You looked back at the three of them and wished to pinch yourself or slap yourself, anything to wake up from this dream. You looked the three of them up and down. It wasn’t too obvious but they looked a lot like Steve Tony and Nat.

The redhead man had broad shoulders, a square jaw and a Bob haircut. He was shorter than the blond woman standing beside him.

You stopped breathing for a minute when you looked at her. She was tall, taller than any woman you’d ever seen probably taller than most men. She had a sharp jawline and high cheekbones. Her short blond hair was slicked back. If you didn’t know better you would be scared by her sharp features but you couldn’t help look away from her piercing blue eyes. That’s when you realized.

“Steve?”, you breathed out after what felt like forever.

“No no, she’s Stevie now”, you whipped your heard to look at the short brunette woman standing behind the redhead. Her hair was short with flicks of grey. She had wrinkles around her eyes and mouth.

“Yeah and she’s Toni now. As in Toni with an i.”, she redhead said.

“What is going on here?!”, you yelled and looked at Carol for an explanation.

“Well we were on the mission everything was going quite well. But then somebody decided to make some sexist jokes.”, she gave Toni and the red head a icy stare. “So they changed these idiots into the opposite sex. To teach them a lesson. They will go back to their old selves soon enough.”

“Ok it was just a joke! How was I supposed to know they would be so sensitive”, Toni whined.

“Wait who are ‘they’?”, you asked her

“Aliens”, she answered and walked back to the spaceship “alright I have to leave good luck”

“Oh no you don’t. How are we supposed to fix this?” Toni chased behind her asking and then begging her to stay.

You looked at the red head who would most probably be Nat and then at Stevie. Not really knowing what to say your gaze went down Stevie’s body. Your eyes widened when you looked at the curve of her breasts. You couldn’t see them properly under her tshirt but you could tell that they were big. It was no surprise, Steve did always have big assets.

“Uh... can we go inside?”, Stevie asked awkwardly rubbing her forearm with her hand.

You hadn’t uttered a single word still speechless and in shock. Was this real life? You had solved so many problems, seen so many things over the years but never in your life did you think you would be here. Looking at your boyfriend or girlfriend, you couldn’t deal with the feelings emerging inside you or how much you wanted to touch her to see if her skin was as soft as it looked.

You could only see her arms and face as she was wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt. She had a soft sheen of blond hair on her arms, not nearly as coarse as Steve’s arm hair used to be. Her arms were still muscular and definied but much more slimmer. And she clearly wasn’t wearing a bra. Not that you were complaining.

She was looking down at her thighs closing them and then opening them again, probably not sure how to sit. She looked up at you and smiled.

“How are you feeling?”, you asked her.

“Strange”, she said running her hand through her short hair. “Are you okay?”

“Well...”, you started not knowing how to finish. Would she be mad if she knew what was going on in your head? She was confused and in distress this is neither the time nor the place to have unsavory thoughts.

Nat came into the common room and plopped down beside Stevie. “I just used the bathroom. It was quite interesting.”, she said nodding to herself and staring off into space. She looked like she was contemplating her entire life.

You looked at Toni grumbling and making herself a drink. “She left. Said we’ll be back to normal by tomorrow”, she sat down on the sofa in front of you sipping her drink. She looked down at her breast before squeezing one.

“Toni!”, Stevie chastised him and looked away. You laughed at both of them, Nat and Toni joined you as laughter filled the hall.

“Imagine if Stark was born a woman”, Nat wondered.

“They definitely wouldn’t call you a playboy. They'd call you much worse names.”, you said before going back to admiring Stevie in all her glory while you had time.

“I’m going to head out. Good night kids. Pray to your gods that we go back to our old selves tomorrow”, Toni said putting her empty glass on the coffee table before leaving.

Nat yawned and stretched her back. “I’m going to bed as well. Long mission. Good night”

“So, what do you wanna do?”, you tentatively asked Stevie. You were suddenly nervous around her, the way someone would be around a new crush. You went back and forth between looking at her eyes, breasts and your lap.

“Let’s just go to bed. But... uh.. I could just sleep in the guest room if you like.” She scratched her neck blushing just like your Steve would. You smiled at her. There was no need to be nervous. This was the same Steve you knew and loved.

“No. We can sleep together. I’ve missed you”, you take her hand in yours. It felt the same but a bit different. Maybe because her hands were much smaller than Steve’s.

“I’m not me though”, she mused looking at your fingers linked together.

“I don’t mind. In fact I like it”, maybe you were being too bold but this might be the only chance you ever get.

“Oh?”, she looked at you her pink plump lips pouting. They looked even more kissable right now. Her nose was slimmer but still a bit crooked. The cute confused expression on her face reminded you so much of your Steve. Which was bizarre because she was still your Steve.

You couldn’t help it anymore, you leaned in putting your hand on the armrest for support and joined both your lips. She was stiff at first but then relaxed. You licked her lips and she opened her mouth kissing you deeply. She had missed your lips and your touch for the past week.

You broke apart after a few minutes. You looked into her eyes trying to catch your breathe. You decided to sit on her lap like you usually do. She put her hand around you as you nuzzled into her neck breathing her in. She smelled different, more feminine, but you could still smell hints of Steve’s soap and cologne.

“Are you sure about this?”, she asked intensely looking into your eyes.

You cradled her face in your hands. “I am as long as you’re comfortable. I’ve always wanted to do that. Be with a woman. Just never got the chance.”

“I... uh.. wouldn’t know what to do to”, she murmured looking away.

Steve, bless his heart, would never go anywhere near porn. He always found it too gratuitous. Never mind that the few sex tapes the two of you did make were plenty gratuitous.

No matter how much he liked to act like a boy Scout you knew all his kinks and perversions. But you had seen and read your fair share of erotica and you knew what you liked. You could make it work.

“You’ve always wanted to be with a woman?”, he asked and you nodded “you never told me that”

“I don’t know. I like women but don’t even feel like thinking about anyone else when I have you. Man or woman”, you shrugged. She blushed at that giving you a wide grin.

“Well... maybe Carol..”, you trailed off. You had developed a slight crush on her since the moment you met her. She was so fierce and strong. She didn’t take shit from anyone. You smiled at how she just left everyone here and went on her next mission to save the universe.

She was someone admirable. Or maybe it was just because she was a lot like Steve. Captain and everything.

Stevie hummed at that. She had seen you looking at Carol in adoration, her suspicions were just confirmed. She didn’t feel bad or jealous. She knew you were hers.

***

You had made yourself at home between Stevies leg while she laid her head on your pillow. She was apprehensive about letting you go down on her or see her. But you were adamant about giving her the experience of a female orgasm.

Maybe you had your selfish reasons as well. You couldn’t stop looking at her pretty pink pussy. It might be the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. You were tempted to whip out your phone and click a few pictures.

There were little dirty blond hair sprinkled around it. You wondered if you liked it because it was objectively pretty or because it was attached to the love of your life.

You smiled to yourself when you noticed it was glowing. She was probably getting impatient. She had been on a tasking mission, she deserves some relief. You were a bit anxious even if you knew what you had to do, you had never done it before. Your core tingled when you remembered the first time Steve ate you out. How you had to direct him and tell him exactly what to do. He was pretty much a pro at it now.

You licked a shy stripe up her lips. You gained a little bit of confidence when you felt her gasp and shiver. You licked a few more stripes before sucking on her clit. She seemed to like it when you did it faster so you increased your pace.

You pushed your tongue inside of her while licking her up. You decide to try incorporating your fingers as well. Pushing one and then two inside of her before thrusting them in and out with purpose.

She grunted and pushed your head back towards her core. “Shit”, she screamed as you began lapping her up again.

Steve never had any qualms about cursing during love making. It gave you great pleasure knowing you’re the only one that ever gets to see this wild feral side of him. Or her.

“Oh god”, she clutched your hair fisting them in her hand before coming all over your mouth. You lapped up everything you could.

You climbed up on your bed and looked down into her eyes. “How was that?”, you asked stroking her cheek.

“Pretty good”, she smiled up at you her blue eyes twinkling.

You raised your brows at her frowning. “Just pretty good?”

“It was perfect. But nothing different, I think”, she replied bringing your hand to her lips giving it a kiss. “Now it’s your turn”, she smirked.

“No”, you said firmly and got off the bed disappearing into your closet.

“No?”, she asked before sitting up trying to see what you were up to.

You return to your bed tying your favorite strap on to your hips and coating it with a generous amount of lube. You smirked when you looked at her staring at it. “What do you think?”

You already knew the answer to that question. You had used the very same toy on Steve’s ass more times than you could count. As much as you loved being dominated by him you also liked pleasing him, having him completely at your mercy.

She visibly gulped down. “How do you want to do it?”

“I’d like to look at your face.” You said holding her face in your hands stroking her cheeks. You push her down on the bed. Kneeling between her legs. You groped and stroked her body. It was unsurprisingly as soft as you imagined it would be. You held her breasts in your hands for a minute squeezing them and stroking her nipples. “they’re so soft”, you wondered out loud.

“Now you know why I like yours so much”, she said chuckling

You squeezed her pink hard nipple between your fingers before taking it in your mouth, giving it a harsh suck.

“Fuck... doll I need you”, she whined grabbing your dildo lining it up to her pussy.

You released her nipple with a pop swatting her hands away. “Be patient”, you scolded. She pouted at you but kept her hands to herself.

After sucking on her breasts for a while you lined your dildo upto her pussy. You snaked a hand under her hips to pull her up towards you, just like Steve used to do with you. You needed to be as close to her as possible.

You have her an open mouthed kiss slowly pushing into her. She moaned into your mouth. You fucked her nicely and slowly. Holding her in your hands as if she was the most precious thing to you, which she truly was.

You increased your pace when you felt her moaning and grunting loudly, knowing she was probably very close. You looked down at her face scrunched up in pleasure as she came around your cock.

You had never been able to look at Steve’s face when he came, either you were too fucked out from your own orgasms or were focusing on making him last longer.

Now looking down at her, doing something that was only pleasure able for her felt incredibly intimate. It felt better than any orgasm could’ve.

You pulled out of her, taking the strap on off before cuddling with her.

“That was something else”, she mumbled feeling high from her intense orgasm.

***

Later that night you had some how convinced Stevie to let you put make up on her. She didn’t agree at first but with some pouting she was basically putty in your hands.

You lips were set in a firm straight line in concentration as you tried not to mess up her eyeliner. Her hair was incredibly short so there wasn’t much you could do with it. You wondered if she would let you take some pictures.

“So what exactly happened? Why did they turn you into women... and man”, you asked still not sure how they were able to do it.

“It was something Tony said about never understanding women and then Natasha argued with all men are the same or something along those lines”, he said a frown on his face as if he was trying hard to remember it “I was caught in the middle of it trying to get them to stop fighting” You decided to let it go for now. Maybe she’d tell you the whole story some other day.

“One good thing about this is now you can take my name”, you smiled as you imagined Steve with your last name.

“I always thought you’d take mine. I like the thought of you as Mrs Rogers”

“Oh and why would I do that? I was one of the most renowned sheild agent and I am the best avenger”,you said puffing your chest out proudly.

“You might have some competition with that”, she teased smirking at you to which you stuck out your tongue putting some final touches on her face. “I guess our kids could just hyphenate”

You gasped at that, “kids? If you think I’m having more than one child then you’ve lost your mind. You know what it’s like to have a vagina now. Imagine pushing a child the size of a watermelon out of it”, you huffed but looking at her pretty face all your anger melted away.

“I’m sorry sweetheart. You know if I could go through it instead of you I would”, she said stroking your thighs and you knew she was sincere.

Steve would never let anything bad happen to you. Not if he could help it. After he got you back he had vowed to you that he would always protect you.

You looked at her sad face hunched down staring at the ground. She looked as if she was in another world. “Stevie what’s wrong?”

“It’s just what if the kid inherits all my illness. Or the super serum. That could be a danger to you”

You knelt down between her legs so you could look into her eyes. “Hey it’s okay”, you said softly “we don’t have to have kids. And we can always adopt. That gives us much more time”

“Are you sure?”, she asked shyly playing with a strand of your hair.

“Absolutely positive”, you beamed up at her.

***

The next morning you woke up earlier than usual. Stretching your back muscles you smiled looking at the sun shining through the window. It was a beautiful day. Perfect for a picnic. You looked to your side smiling at Steve sleeping peacefully. Wait a minute.

“Steve”, you shook him harshly.

“What?”, he rose his voice heavy and hoarse. He looked down at his body touching his pecs and abs before looking back at you. “I’m back”

“Yeah you’re back”

You both went down to the common room to find if Toni and Nat had went back to their normal selves. They were already waiting for both of you.

“Oh Rogers is back too!”, Tony said eagerly.

“Did you two have fun last night?”, Nat smirked suggestively at the two of you.

“I see neither of you learned your lesson then”, Steve shook his head at them before looking at you, catching you staring at him. “What do you miss Stevie?”

You shook your head at him. Lightly slapping his chest. “I like what’s in here. Doesn’t matter how you look”

[daily-dose-of-imagines]

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ Matchup ♥

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Naruto, One Piece, and Free Match-Up Request

May I request another match-up but for Free, One Piece, and Naruto this time? :) Here’s all my info once more!

Name: Corethra (or Corey for short)

Age: 25

Gender: Female

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual

Occupation: Hand Packer at an ice cream factory. I work 12 hours (5:30pm to 6am) on a rotating schedule.

Birthplace: Memphis, TN, USA. I was raised in the neighborhood called Frayser which is the most impoverished area in Memphis and has a high crime rate as expected.

Zodiac Sign: Pisces (born March 2) My full birth chart can be found here

Enneagram: 5w6

Chinese Zodiac: Year Of The Pig

MBTI Type: INFJ

Alignment: Lawful Neutral

Hogwarts House: Slytherin

Love Language: Acts Of Service

Race/Ethnicity: African-American

Height: 4'11 (Call me short and I’ll kick your butt!)

Body Type/Shape: Average but well developed figure at best. I weigh about 158 lbs and am pretty insecure about my body. I also have really bad scars on my left arm from being bitten by a dog.

Hair Color/Style: Black and naturally curly but I keep it flat-ironed so it’s straight. It’s long and goes down to just below my shoulder blades. There are times when I will have braids put in of various lengths.

Glasses or No?: Yes I wear glasses

Eye Color: Brown

Dress Style: I usually dress up in a casual way, just throwing on whatever looks good at the time but I will sometimes put in the effort when the time calls for it or when I’m in a good mood. I have an affinity for the punk, emo, and goth styles and I rarely wear feminine clothes but I will wear something risky every once in a while.

Hobbies/Interests: Video games, reading, writing, anime, internet surfing, listening to music, politics (sometimes), watching movies/TV shows, basically being an overall nerd. I’m usually either on my laptop or one of my many video game consoles if I’m not on my phone or reading one of my books.

Dislikes: Ignorance, stupidity, restriction, manipulation/gas-lighting, bullying, humanity, not being understood, corruption/injustice, close-mindedness

Personality: At first glance, I seem quiet and keep to myself, only speaking when I need to or when I’m spoken to. I’m an anti-social introvert to the fullest and don’t care much for small talk or going out. I prefer to have deeper conversations. When I get comfortable enough in whatever environment I’m in, I start to open up bit by bit. I’m a tomboy and pretty rough-minded as well as stubborn. I’m very sassy, have a smart, sarcastic, and witty mouth if not humorous and outrageous at times, can be borderline rude and mean, and I’m more sensitive than I care to be. I can literally cry at someone’s suffering especially if it’s someone I’m close to or even a total stranger. I’m very empathetic and my heart is bigger than what most people would expect. Most people describe me as quiet, intelligent, creative, dorky, a smartass, and really sweet. I love a good laugh and have an open sense of humor to boot.

Many of my friends say that I’m very sweet and kind which I usually am if I’m in a good mood as well as affectionate as hell. Hugs and pet names galore with me! However only my friends and family see that side of me. My language is often unfiltered, harsh, foul, and blunt which shocks people because they think I’m a pure angel. I say what I want when I want and no one tells me otherwise. If they do, they can expect a mouthful from me. I’m an escapist and very imaginative, can be a bit scatterbrained at times, and I’m methodical and detailed to the point of perfectionism. I’m usually a walking contradiction in terms of personality in so many ways to the point where the real me is almost impossible to decipher. To make matters more complicated, I’m not very good at expressing myself verbally and prefer to let my actions do the talking. I also express myself better through written form.

I have many pet peeves and I get annoyed easily in general. I’m also slowly embracing misanthropy and nihilism but I can be pretty idealistic so it balances out. I’m practically zero tolerance when it comes to bullshit. I hate confrontation and conflict but I’m starting to work on it so I can be less passive-aggressive and more assertive. I also wish to stand up for myself more often than I should so people won’t think that I’m weak and an easy target. I’m pretty cynical which is to be expected and usually expect the worst from people. When someone angers me, I will either just withdraw altogether and completely cut them off (slam the door basically) or get in their face and go off before doing the former. I’m the “hold my anger in and release it all at once” type but I hope to change that one day and stop letting things fester before they get out of hand. I can be quite petty and even cold as well and if someone wrongs me, they will have to make the first move to mend fences. I refuse to apologize if I’m not in the wrong and I will not accept gaslighting/guilt tripping. I also refuse to change for others and will admit to having quite a lot of pride but that’s mostly due to me not wanting to be hurt and manipulated, mistreated, or used.

I have issues with trust and a wild imagination to boot. I usually trust my instincts and can see right through bullshit. I don’t like taking risks and I have to know all the details when I do something so I don’t mess up and look like an idiot. I am indeed a perfectionist and introverted to a fault which often prevents me from trying new things and going outside my comfort zone. I haven’t been in a relationship yet and am still a virgin due to my issues with trust and not wanting to be hurt or humiliated as well as being quite picky/perfectionistic with the people I allow in my life. I have high standards for both people and myself although I’m pretty laid-back and my dislike of conflict allows me to also take a lot of shit from people too before I eventually say “fuck it” and slam the door or go off on them. I don’t think very highly of myself and can sometimes fall into a period of self-hatred and self-pity.

Many people praise me for my intelligence which is fitting since I’m an intellectual. My ideals and beliefs are rather odd to say the least (I’m a classical liberal/independent and despise most ideologies/ideas. This includes religion, feminism, social justice, traditionalism, statism, big government, nationalism, socialism/communism, etc.) and I feel misunderstood because of it (mostly because of the black community ostracizing me). I am indeed a rebel, open-minded, and a free thinker. No one tells me how to think or feel or else they face my wrath. I highly value power over myself and I think it’s the most important thing that a person needs in order to survive. I am definitely an outcast at heart and I often distance myself from others and don’t like talking about my feelings or beliefs because I think most people lack the ability/capacity to understand me. Before I give my opinion on something, I like to do as much research as possible as well as look at things from all perspectives before coming to my own conclusion. I don’t mind discussing things but I prefer logic over emotion when doing so which makes it damn near impossible these days for me to have an real conversation without insults and threats being thrown (usually towards me). Chances are I’m gonna find something wrong with damn near anything someone believes in or says and I’m not afraid to call it out when I see it. Once I do open up and express how I feel, the gates of passion will open up and never close. I also have high morals and values and stick to my guns no matter what which can make me pretty stubborn at times.

I’m currently battling depression and often experience many symptoms of it including suicidal thoughts and depression spells. I also suffer from iron-deficiency anemia as well as irregular, prolonged periods. These things are pretty annoying for me to deal with whenever they flare up. 

Overall, I’m pretty crazy and a handful to deal with. Good luck matching me up with someone :P

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Hello @sacredwarrior88 and thank you so much for requesting with us! I am so sorry that this came out so late, but I do hope you enjoy this!

>Admin 𝕋

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

𝐼 𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓅 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽…

Ace! I feel that you and ace would be such a great couple! He is open minded and kind to others whereas you are the same way! You are passionate like he is, caring like he is, loyal to the bone like he is! He would see you and see your personality and just instantly fall in love you and your personality! Like, I can’t even imagine how much he will want you on his crew, so they he can keep on you and protect you at all times-- though he will soon figure out that you don’t need help, you can take care yourself--which he will find extremely attractive, no doubt about that! 

He will love that fact that you are independent, because he really values individualism and independency, he sees it as a great traits to have. But he will also love the fact that you are sensitive, and can sometimes get into your own  head. He understands that, knows it all too well, so he will try with all his might to try and make sure that you are happy and always smiling! But he will love how fierce you can be to other people, never bowing down to their expectations! 

All in all, I feel like Ace would be a great man for you in the one piece universe! He would be attentive to you, would love your attitude and personality, and would absolutely adore how loyal and strong you are! make sure to love him thoroughly!

Ah, Sai! He is much like Ace, just a little less emotional, which is fine! I feel like you and Sai would make a couple for a couple reasons! He would love how mature you are, and how logical you can be, and-- like ace-- he loves the fact that you are extremely loyal to your friends! That is a true factor in the way he will see you, and it is for the better! He will se how strong you are, emotionally and will be envious and at the same time fascinated! I Feel like Sai will look at you with wide eyes, his breath caught in his throat, his heart beating wildly in his ribcage because he will love you that much! All the things you are interested he will want to hear with enthusiasm, everything you love he will want to learn and hear from you, to get to know you better!

Another thing is that if you were to go to him with your insecurities and how you are battling depression, he will try to understand, and once he does he will try to everything and anything to make sure you feel better! You need a massage? He’s on it! You need cuddles? oh yeah he will give you some! You need chocolate or sweets or anything of the like? He’ll run to the store, and be back 5 minutes tops! 

All in all, I feel like the cool, mature Sai, with a heart of pure gold will be such a good match for you! He will make sure that you uncomfortable with him, he will never want to make you unhappy, and he will definitely do anything i his power to make sure that you will keep on loving him as much as you can!

Rei! Now, with Rei, I wanted to go a more cute route. I feel that Rei would be equal parts and scared and in love with you! He sees how strong you are against people that oppose, he sees how strong you are for your friends, and how you have such a different personality to everybody else around him, and he will immediately fall in with you. Like instantly! To him, you’d be like a beautiful butterfly blooming right in front of him, and he will want to have you all tot himself! Of course, he won’t force you, but he will definitely watch you at a distance longingly!

He is very much an introvert and your calm but strong aura would definitely help with his anxiety! I just see him melting next you, into your lap or shoulder whenever you are around him because he is so comfortable around you. He doesn’t do this with just anybody so it would be a real honor! And when it it comes to your insecurities, he would want to make sure that you know he loves you the way are, and if you were to want to change something about yourself, then he will support you all the way, as long as you are happy! He will just love that you are such a freethinker and so openminded about things, so unlike him!

All in all, I feel like Rei would love you and (somewhat) idolize because you have all these traits that he would love to have. This perfectionist will understand how it feels to be such a perfectionist and will want to help you with that too! He will love to the moon and back(stroke)!

[brandstifter-sys]

The Tales of Rabidosa and Scylla Emerald

Word Count: 1207               (Ao3)

Pairing: Dukexiety

Rating: T

Warnings: Sex mention, coming out as trans, confusing pronouns, mtf!remus, ftm!virgil

Dukexiety Week: Bonus Day - Superheroes Virgil just came out to his girlfriend as trans and it could have gone better, luckily he’s got a miraculous and a crime-fighting partner who’s always got his back. But coming out to her leads to some unforseen consequences. Miraculous AU

@dukexietyweek

---

Rabidosa crouched on top of some old apartment building, staring off into the city in search of trouble. She was hoping that her patrol would give her something to think about other than her civilian life. Things were icky, and maybe telling Ree the truth about her gender could have gone better. Out of the skin-tight purple costume and mask, covered in black cobwebs, Rabidosa was a guy and Virgil was still getting used to calling himself that out loud. 

“Funny meeting you here!” A familiar voice laughed from behind her–yes her, costume on, she/her, the perfect secret identity–and Rabidosa internally groaned. 

“Scylla,” she huffed and rolled her eyes. She didn’t have to look to see the wily hero dressed up in a green pseudo-leather catsuit with her hair tied up in a partial bun, letting the majority of it fall down her back in eight distinct ringlets. Scylla was always trouble.

“Oh, not even a hello?” she said and sat on the edge of the building next to her partner, “Did your boyfriend do something stupid?”

“What?”

“It’s a little early for you to be out on patrol! Especially without any akumas! What happened?” Scylla questioned and shrugged, wiggling her upper lip in thought, as if she had a mustache under that face sleeve. Rabidosa sighed and sat down, unable to think up a decent excuse. 

“I came out to my girlfriend. And she just stared at me so hopelessly lost and confused.”

“Ace? Aro?”

“I’m a dude. And she’s into girls. I don’t want to lose her, but I don’t want her to see me as a girl, or to put herself in an uncomfortable position to be with me.” 

“If she really loves you, she’ll support you. My boyfriend stuck with me when I came out as trans, and he’s been the best. I kinda hate that I didn’t give him the right amount of support today when he told me something huge, not bad but bigger than my dick! I finally have my head wrapped around it, but I don’t know where he is or when he’ll get back.”

“You froze up?”

“I know, I never shut up, and I just froze! I was like Hannelore Schmatz, but with less decay. I just need to think of a way to let him know I’m okay with this thing and that I would set fire to the department of records for him if he asked.”

“Do that and I will have to take you down." 

"You can take me anyway you like if he ends it because I am such a herbo!" Scylla giggled, "I didn't even get to ask him what his name is—Can I ask yours?" 

"I didn't tell you my deadname, why would I tell you this one?" Rabidosa scoffed. 

"Because it's not on any records so I can't stalk you and who knows if you'll think a different name works better later. You can say no, I get it." 

"Might as well get used to saying it out loud," Rabidosa sighed and bit her lip, "My name is Virgil." 

"Virgil?" Scylla parroted, "I like it! It's the kind of name I'd love to moan and scream and whisper and sing, Spiderling. If things don't work out between you and your girlfriend and me and my boyfriend look me up! And down! Take in the sights!" 

Rabidosa snorted and shook her head. Scylla Emerald was always good at lightening the mood, just like Reina. It was an odd comfort and maybe, just maybe, she would take Scylla' offer this time. 

"I'll think about it. But for now, since it's quiet, I'm gonna go ahead and try to talk to my girlfriend. I want that relationship to work." 

"Good idea! My boyfriend might be home too!" Scylla laughed and pulled out a mace from thin air. She stood up and spun it over her head and flew off. Rabidosa wished she could move that fast. She shot a web from her wrist and swung off towards home.

.

Virgil got into the bedroom through the window and powered down. The magic that made him a spidery superheroine condensed in a puff of black fog and condensed in a web-shaped necklace hiding under his tee. The purple kwami that came out of it flew off to hide in the closet—Arie wasn't big on speaking, but Virgil didn't care much about that. He wasn't ready for a confrontation but he had to go into the main apartment and talk to her. 

"Scare Bear?" she called to him from the door, "Are you in there?" 

"Yeah," Virgil said, squeaking just a little bit out of nerves, "You can come in." 

The door flew open and before he knew what was happening, Virgil was being crushed against a strong chest and sandwiched between a pair of anime tiddies. Reina was big on physical contact.

"Scare Bear, I'm sorry for freezing up before! I was just surprised and processing it! I don't care what gender you are as long as you're happy as you! I love you so much!"

"Duchess, I love you too but I can't breathe!" Virgil gasped. Reina let go with a giggle and held him at arm's length. Her eyes were so bright, a perfect match for her smile. She wiggled her mustache and brushed his bangs from his face. 

"Do you have a name yet?" she asked, bouncing in place, playing up anime stereotypes.

"My name is Virgil," he sighed and looked at her hopefully. She froze again. 

"Virgil?" she squeaked as it hit her, "I like it. It's the kind of name I'd love to moan and scream and whisper and sing, Spiderling." 

"Scylla Emerald?" Virgil gasped. Reina nodded. 

"Rabidosa?" she squeaked. Virgil nodded and suddenly pulled her into a hug. He wasn't crying, not at all. 

"Virgil?"

"It's been you all along!" he laughed, "Holy shit it's been you kicking ass with me this entire time!" 

"Yeah, I guess it has!" she giggled, "Which means I can flirt with you without any restraint in costume! And I will because, boy, you look damn good in that suit!" 

"Look who's talking!" Virgil laughed, "the person I had a crush on in middle school has always been my partner!" 

"You had a crush on me? Aw babe, that's embarrassing!" 

"We're dating!" 

"I know but I was a mess! More than usual! I was so hot for Rabidosa too! And look at me now! I'm dating you and I've never been happier! Jug can suck it!" 

"Not until I do, Duchess," Virgil jeered, "If I even leave anything to suck." 

"Scare Bear don't tempt me!" Reina warned. Virgil smirked and pulled her into a kiss. 

"Duchess, if you don't want to that's fine but dammit I am so happy right now! You accept me, and you've been there the whole time! Maybe I want to top off all this miraculous stuff with something that's almost always miraculous." 

"Almost?" Ree teased, "You know every time is miraculous! I get to see all of my boyfriend!"

“I’m gonna have to get used to hearing you say that,” Virgil giggled, “but I love it, almost as much as I love you.”

“I love you too, Spiderling!”

----

Okay so, spiders are good luck, like ladybugs, how could I not? Rabidosa rabidosa is the scientific name for the rabid wolf spider. Scylla is a sea monster from ancient Greek mythos, not exactly bad luck like a black cat but it fit the Duchess.

[teacup-baphomet]

G/t Drabble (Crash landed on a hostile planet trope but NOT via the a tiny vulnerable human in a planet of mean powerful alien bigs route)

tw: a bit of censored cursing. Uh. I’m not sure what else. Maybe broaching of sensitive tops such as sexuality and religion. But not really. Mostly it’s just rlly dumb word play/lame humor and a confused alien being confused (and kinda freaked/troubled due to the confusion? you’ll see if you read it i guess). there is some sad lorg boi times. idk. no romantic relationships. just a shaky friendship is forming between a crash-landed big-arse alien (a human! *gasp*  i woulda never guessed something as vile as that o: ) and one of the much smaller, very much not human locals. most want to kill the poor dude who got stuck on this planet of hostile lil guys who think he’s a monster and immediately decide they much off him asap. so like having this one ally is kinda important to him. But it’s hard. because. lots reasons rlly. culture differences. the language tech can only do so much. the size diff creates definite issues because trust is hard in general. and trusting a big being that could easily cause havoc on your planet mostly just cuz he /seems/ nice is not a very good foundation... there is much to learn between the two before they can be truly good frens. so uh good luck to them lol *raises glass* I mean. I don’t think I’ll ever write these two again. but I’m sure they’ll end up good friends. probably.

Anyway without further adieu, here have a disappointment (read: attempt to be creative but i’m kinda lazy tbh and still kinda bitter I can’t draw for more than like 10 minutes before I start spacing out :/ )

"We are called humans or the scientific name is homo sapiens" spoke the large alien, Lyle.

"Homo sapiens? That is rather long, is it not? Why is a "scientific name" even a thing? Why would that be necessary? Scientific name versus what kinda name? Emotional name? Why are these science names two words? Seems annoying. What is wrong with just calling yourselves simply homos? Or something else just as nice and concise. Straight to the point if you will. Probably. I... Uh.. I obviously don't know what exactly is the purpose of a scientific name as i already implied... Sooo..." The much shorter – and much scalier- native being (called Torrynts) awkwardly looked off the side to stare at the plain, blank, siding of their dilapidated, isolated house as if it were the most interesting thing in the entire vicinity. Which it wasn’t of course. There was a f***ing alien 15 times their size only a few them-sized lengths way…

 Lyle gave his new comrade – and only friend on this gawdforsaken planet that mostly wants him dead- th pondering, and possibly ironically, rather colourfully scaled Torrynt by the name of Kyvlar a bemused look, bordering on coy.

"Huh. 'Straight' to the point you say?" He paused with a small snort. "Well, my not-so-statuesque friend, do I got news for you~"

Kyvlar suddenly blanched, giving a Lyle a look that was like a knife to the heart while blurting out. "Wait, wait, wait! Hold up! We? There are more than one of you? Here? On this planet? Were you just a distraction the whole time. Oh... Oh no.... Have we really been victim a secret homo invasion this whole time! I-"

 Their panicked monologue was interrupted by a most horrendous noise. Like a slowly dying tornado with the hiccups or something.

"STOP. Stop I-I can't. I can't. This is too much much!" Spoke Lyle with his hand covering the bottom half of his  and his eyes scrunched shut.

 'Welp,' thought the Torrynt, 'This is the end. This is when I die. I should have known better than to immediately put my trust in such an enormous obviously dangerous specimen. Ho-'

 Kyvlar’s dramatic internal speech was interrupted when the alien surprised them by uncovering the his face, revealing a huge grin. ‘They weren't upset? Huh?’ The Torrynt blinked owlishly at the human in confusion.

 "Sh*t, bite-size (Kyvlar noticeably paled at the impromptu nickname not 100% the foreign joking tone, well it would have been noticeable to someone their size at least), I know you don't mean to, context-wise, but you reminded me of my great aunt Karen when my Uncle Todd and Uncle Copper decide to have their friends over along with relatives for a gatherin'."

Plastering on a faux distraught look and blatantly mocking tone, he  continue with exaggerated hand gestures. "Oh no, it's the...the...," he paused with snort, "... the homo invasion... No, no, no... Not here... not in this... this good, Christian neighborhood. Aren't just two of them enough? Oh woe is me!" The alien dropped the mocking tone and smirked towards the smaller being. "Heh. Good ol' great aunt Karen could never remember Uncle Todd was Jewish and so was the majority of that neighborhood.... It’s where my Uncle Todd was raised actually…"

 The said smaller being just stared blankly at the homo-no-human they supposed as just “homo” meant something else, they weren’t sure what else, beyond just something else.

 "Uhhm. Wh-what? U-Uhm, so what exactly is “homo” then? And what’s Christian? And Jewish too. What’s that? Are... Are those other types of -uh- intelligent, sentient creatures on your planet? Y-you know, b-beside hom-er-h-humans? Or are these subtypes of humans? What kinda are you? What is a great aunt? or Uncle? Does the great indicate a larger size? Oh gawd, a-aren't you humans b-big enough regularly? Oh... W-wait. O-or are you a great- uhm- great aunt, was it? E-er, g-great something? Ohhh. Zyntall (Torrynt swear). I'm sooo confused r-right now... " The timid tiny being, sighed in frustration before their eyes snapped open wide in a panic, and they did an immediate one-eighty with their behavior, and it was off all their previously trust, as wavering as it was, vanished in an instant, squeaking out a quick "sorry. oh, Z-zyntall... I'm so-so-sooo sorry. I-I hope I d-didn't offend y-you or anyth-thing... p-please, oh please, don't hurt me" while gazing everywhere except towards the much larger alien, hoping desperately the 'bite-size' nickname was just a bad joke...

 Clearly they not only didn't get what so hilarious about the whole thing but also thought he was a monster prone to violence – still. Lyle sighed, all the mirth that was previously in his expression draining out of him leaving him with an uncomfortable grimace on their face. How disappointing... They really wish there was another human here to share in the jesting. But alas, that was not meant to be. At least as far as they knew there was no "homo invasion" in the making. Lyle wasn’t naïve. He knew humans were easy to slip into a gray moral state, at best. The role of villains at worst. And many of his kind would likely take advantage of a planet full of tiny, vulnerable people. Lyle couldn’t help but inwardly cringe at the thought, getting nervous about something that wasn’t an issue. At least now. Currently, human-wise, it was just him on this distant planet. And as far as he knew, no one - well, no other human at least- had any clue where they were. It probably just seemed he simply disappeared. Never to be seen again most likely. Trapped on this random alien planet in scenario that is akin to some sort of a personal hell of sorts.

'Wow. Hello, major depressive episode that’s making me overly dramatic. I haven't seen you since I was - what - eighteen?' thought Lyle regretfully. Calling this planet a personal hell was probably a bit over the top. But still, he couldn’t even seem to keep the trust of his single native ally. It only adds to his feelings of lonely isolation. And he feared his lonely angst will only get worse and worse. But only time will tell.

Giving a small sigh, he mentally prepped himself to try and get back his small friend’s trust. At least he was able to laugh for a wee bit earlier. It had been so long since he had done such. It was nice. Hopefully next time it will not lead to a backtracking in his attempted friendly ships with an open local, or even worse, a hostile local. The little laser guns that native being had stung like a b*tch. It reminded him when he got bit a couple times by some fire ants during a vacation as a child.

-----------

So yeah these were rando improvised characters made on the spot.

But Lyle is a guy (he/him. He’d be chill with they/them too)

And Kyvlar is… a Torrynt. So like they/them I guess. Torrynts don’t have genders. Like at all. I guess they hermaphroditic (intersex if talking by human terms but not really as they are capable of reproduction and they aren’t human so… I dunno… Not even sure if hermaphrodite is a useful term. As idk if hermaphroditic animals, in nature, are capable of reproduction… I don’t think so? But I’m not sure tbh…). There is no variants like there are with human “sex”. And male/female concepts are 200+% foreign to these wee reptile-like aliens (albeit warm-blooded minded, so perhaps more draconian than reptilian idk. Also aliens being described as reptilian gives me hives due to a conspiracy theory that is like super bigoted actually n’ stuff. Very yikes. Don’t want to talk it about it rlly…). Their reaction would def be “wtf. That’s the weirdest sh*t ever” to such a thought as male n female binary dynamics & whatnot. No exceptions. They’d be like why a lot of you guys limiting yourself because of whether or not you are a potential offspring vessel or not. I don’t understand.

So Yeah. Uh. Anyways.

Their conversation about this prolly (or close to this):

Lyle: Hi. I’m Lyle. Just some random dude form Earth I guess.

Kyvlar: a random dude what?

Lyle: uh. I’m a dude. I guess I meant that I’m a boy though dudes don’t really have to be boys I think. But not to derail too much… Yeah. I’m a man/guy/boy/brosef, whatever you wanna call the male gender. Please not by brosef actually, heh. Anyway. Yep. A boy. That is what I am. Uh. How about you. I can just tell… you ….you have uhm two legs. Oh damn. Wait. That sounded so stupid. I wouldn’t assume your gender or anything. I just… You don’t look exactly human so..uh. UGH. Nevermind. I don’t even know where I was going with that... Heh. ANYWAY, so yeah what’s your gender is what I’m trying to say. Sorry I’m awkward as f***. I’m not used to socializing much. Been doing deep space sh** on my own for a few years now and.. uh.. yeahhhh….

Kyvlar: *stares blankly*

Lyle: Uh. Yeah. So. A Gender? Do you, uhm, have one? Or…????

Kyvlar: Uh. I think so? I mean I’m mostly a day-by-day I’ll figure it out then type but I, I really want be able to fix my home up. I want to learn to cook. Kinda suck at it now. Uhm. I guess… Uh. I should probably help you get on good terms with my people so they stop trying to kill you. You seem nice n’ stuff… so yeah. There’s that. I could use a little more purpose in my life. Not to-

Lyle: wait. Huh? What are you talking about? Are you talking about an agenda?

Kyvlar: Yes????

Lyle: *snorts* I didn’t say an agenda. I said a gender. As in A. Gen. Durr. Like are male or female or maybe something off the typical binary track??

Kyvlar: Uh. Er. Huh??? I, I’m so confused right now…

Lyle: Hooo boy. I’m so not prepared for this discussion at all.

-----------

One of these days I’m gonna have a character that’s silver-tongue and smooth af and not some bumbling awkward doofus (*cough* like I am *cough*).

[poptod]

None Like You (Ahkmenrah x Reader)

Description: You're the god of the forgotten, and upon birth you become friends with a prince. The bond is lifelong and beyond.

Prompt: Cat

Notes: Your name is Mahjur (again, because it makes more sense for those times rather than a modern name). Gender neutral again!

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21614689

Word Count: 25k

Warning: There is smut in this, and it IS underage. I regret writing it now, but it’s historically accurate, and I wanted to show the complexities of the relationship. 

With a deep breath, your eyes opened for the first time. Standing over your lying form was a woman with the head of a cat, and she was smiling, seemingly happy with who you were. To your fortune you didn’t actually need to be taught very much - everything had already been instilled in your mind. Language, images, recognition, all of it you knew, and you knew how the universe worked.

“I have crafted you from the mud of this nile, the Aur,” she had said, and she introduced herself as Bastet, claiming to be your mother. You knew nothing else from experience but that, and you trusted her, which was a good decision on your part. “Your bones are made of alabaster and porcelain,” she said, and she warned, “be careful not to break them.”

You knew how the universe worked but humans were entirely new, with careful rituals that took hours to explain the history of. Beside your mother, both of you in a separate form of a cat, she showed you their inner workings, their worship, how you were one of their supposed gods.

“One day, someone will build a temple,” she said, leading you away from the small village. “They will ask for a god of something very specific, and when the time is right, you will know to come. Do not force yourself into any position.”

She showed you all of Kemet over the span of a month, and then she left you, having her own duties to attend to.

Not long after you found your calling, a young child building the smallest shrine on the edge of a village, asking for protection. She had been abandoned, so you came to her aid, and you blessed her with luck. That was how you found your own footing in the world.

All of that happened in very quick succession, so fast that you wondered how the many years ahead of you would fare. Only two months you’d been alive and you’d grown to quiet popularity. No one spoke aloud about you, thinking that speaking of the protector of the abandoned would bring bad luck, but they built shrines, dedications, sometimes even temples. The hushed word spread so quickly in fact, that you had a garden shrine in Memphis of all places, another two months after you’d found your title.

When you visited, it was in your cat form, staying in the shadows of the temple and watching servants tend to the various cats who had taken up hold in the shelter. It was a nice building, with a short staircase leading to an open area held up by magnificent white pillars. Alabaster stone, you noted, with red design painted on.

That evening, relaxing in the temple, a noise from outside disturbed you. You arose from your rest, nose twitching as you dragged the scent of lion out of the air. The fur of your neck standing up, you came from your spot to meet the animal.

“Hello, Mahjur,” the lion said in a low, growling voice, befitting his long and unruly mane. You did not respond, not fully sure of what to say. You hadn’t ever met this lion before. In fact, you hadn’t met any lion before, and certainly not one that could talk.

“I am Maahes, your brother,” he clarified, sitting on his hind legs, looking considerably more calm once he noticed who he was speaking to. “You are Mahjur.”

“Yes,” you said hesitantly, sitting down opposite him.

“You’ve made a name for yourself - deity of the abandoned. Is that all, though?”

“Can there be more?”

“Yes. Our mother is the goddess of many things. Cats, namely, hence our forms, but also of fire, sunset, dance, pleasure, the home, and… many other things.”

“You don’t remember, do you?” You asked, almost laughing.

“Shut up, you’re two months old, I’m at least three hundred.”

“I’m actually four months old,” you said.

“And have you even once strayed from your current form?”

You hadn’t, but he didn’t need to know that, so you just sniffed, pointing your nose upwards. He scoffed, shaking his head.

“I’m not here for petty sibling feuds.”

“Really? ‘Cause from the way you’ve been acting it seems like -“

“You’re insolent. Thoth has news for you.”

You stiffened. You didn’t have to remember your mother’s advice considering Thoth as you already had the knowledge implanted at your birth - he was, in essence, the god of knowledge. Noticing your state, Maahes continued.

“His only words were, ‘be wary.’ My own advice,” he checked to see if you were still listening, which you were, quite intently, “is to be open to everything. If someone asks you for help, acquiesce. If adventure calls, go, but do not stay still. Be wary. Most of all, be ready.”

“Thank you. I think,” you mumbled, your brow furrowed.

“Be safe. I’ve heard what Bastet made you from, and I don’t agree with the material use. You’re very small, and… flimsy.”

“Thanks,” you said again, more sarcastically.

With a grunt he was off again, jumping off the short ledge of the temple, wandering through the tall grass that the rivers brought.

Throughout the night you contemplated his words, his advice, and the overall conversation. Be wary, Thoth advised you, and it astounded you beyond reason why he would give advice to you. You were hardly known but, then again, you were thinking that as you sat in your temple in one of the largest cities in Kemet. And perhaps your brother was right, maybe you did need to spend more time in your human form. The whole cat thing was mostly for worship and easy travel, but human was supposed to be your main form.

You breathed deeply, taking in the scents you could, for your other form was subpar in that area of things, before switching forms.

Almost as small as you were before. Not really, but compared to the servants still outside of your hiding spot, you were pretty small. In the shadow of the pillars you went unnoticed till dawn, where it’d be painfully obvious that you were a human, and to them, not where you should be. So you left, taking to wandering the streets of the great city, mostly staying in market areas. The homes sort of creeped you out.

It was a lively area, filled with different cultures you had no idea existed, all with their own fabrics, spices, and history. In amazement you walked through the streets, stopping at every stall you could to see what different things they sold. Eventually you figured out that many places sold the same thing but in different quality, or from different places. It bored you, but it didn’t put you off too much, still wandering with a smile.

One stand in particular caught your eye, filled with glittering gemstones and carved bone decorated and molded into fine jewelry. The man who owned the stand smiled as you examined the goods, getting pushed every now and then by the passing crowd. As your eyes trailed over the different necklaces and rings you found a band, thick enough to go around your neck, made of solid gold.

“How much is this?” You asked, and he replied with a hefty price. With a whistle, you materialized the necessary amount of silver rings to pay for it. When the transaction was completed, the necklace was tight around your neck, hanging just below your Adam’s apple and rather heavy. You supposed you probably looked nice, but you couldn’t check until later.

Later that evening you found yourself being the holder of new titles, just as your brother had suggested the night before. Though you hadn’t officially ‘pronounced’ it (you had no idea how to do that) you wanted to be a deity of joy and innocence. This very sudden urge came to you as you watched a boy, older than you by around ten years, play by the riverside with a stick and three rocks.

He didn’t have much, but he was happier than any of the adults you’d seen walking the roads.

You’d later come to learn two things as you followed the child home: number one was that it was rude to follow people home without their consent. The second was that he was not, in fact, a bearer of very little, but instead a bearer of all the riches he could wish for, but it didn’t deter your fondness of the boy. He could’ve chosen from many of the vast gifts he was given but, instead, he picked up a stick and played with the fish. It swirled something inside you, and for the first time in your very short life, you smiled genuinely.

A few more days passed before you even thought to talk to him. In your cat form you could follow him unnoticed in his palace home, and that was how you’d learned in the first place that he was the prince of all of Kemet. It was also how you’d learned his name, and it was the same form you often watched him in. If you were to approach him, it’d probably be best to do so in a form closer to his age. Your current human form was a more average age of twenty, so you switched it around, making a younger version of it.

It then occurred to you, watching him in the safety of the reeds, that you had no idea how to approach him. You hadn’t ever had friends before. Would he be a friend? Were you allowed to have friends? More importantly, how did you make friends? You’d learned from watching that simply approaching someone could be weird and you felt far too anxious to do so.

With a twitch of your nose your form changed to a child, and with your thumbs not in your previous form, you picked away at the mud beneath your feet. Beautiful, fertile mud black with its’ own nurturing. Gulping, you decided that maybe, making friends just wasn’t for you.

He wasn’t doing much. Just kneeling there, one knee pressed into the dirt, arranging the rocks and mud to make a house but it was all too much.

You turned. The reeds brushed against bare skin and cloth as you tried to walk away in silence, but the motion gave away your position in the still of the evening. No wind, no excuse for the noise, and the boys’ head turned in sudden alertness, staring directly at you but not seeing you.

“Hello?” He said after a moment of waiting. “Is anyone in there?”

You just sniffed, your body shaking from nervousness and your hands clenched tight together. Your throat too tight and too thick to form any coherent speech.

“You don’t have to be afraid,” he said with a giggle, his voice turning from alarm to playfulness. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

Still, you couldn’t seem to get your feet to move. So closer he came, wading through the mud and the reeds till he came face to face with you, the two of you now both hidden away in the privacy of the Aur.

“Hi! What’s your name?” He asked, his eyes bright with curiosity, beaming a smile that only served to make you more anxious despite its welcoming features.

“Mahjur,” you mumbled quietly, rubbing your arm with your hand, trying to create some sort of distraction for yourself.

“I’m Ahkmen. Nice to meet you,” he said, holding out his hand for you to shake. You looked him up and down rapidly, having never come this close to him before. Then you took his hand, trying hard not to grasp too firmly or too loose.

“I’m trying to build a house for this turtle. Want to help?” He asked, grabbing your now held hands and pulling you out of your safety. You tried to say something, only getting out stutters and half words as he sat you down beside him in front of the failing little mud hut. Beside it, a tortoise you never saw before, looking rather unbothered by her failing house. She looked perfectly contented in her shell, but you didn’t say anything. Children were fickle. Then again, by all accounts, you were a child as well. Ahkmen was older than you. By a lot.

“I can’t seem to get the mud to stay though. Not long enough for a roof anyways,” he sighed, stacking more mud on top and watching as it flopped back down onto the ground. Without really thinking you pressed two fingers to the little mud hut, blessing the house and its innocence so that it may stay upright.

“It should work now,” you said to him, still keeping your voice quiet. It seemed odd to use, having never used it for extended conversation before. He nodded, piling the dirt on till it made good walls.

“There we go,” he muttered, pressing his lips together in concentration as he worked.

“The roof… might want to make that out of grass,” you suggested, watching as the roof fell again to both your disappointments.

“You’re right,” he sighed, and the two of you grabbed at the grass, pulling it out of the ground and weaving it into a simple pattern. When the small square was complete, you placed the tortoise into the little hut and put the roof over it.

“It’s good you made a door,” you said.

“Wouldn’t want him to starve to death, right?”

“Her.”

“Oh, okay,” he said with a shrug and a smile. “Want to go to my house?”

“Your house?” You clarified, wondering if this was what friends did. And of course, you already knew his house was the pharaoh’s palace, which might not be the most welcoming environment for an unknown child.

“Yeah! It’s up on that hill,” he said, pointing to the palace in the distance, the regular white painted red and gold in the dying sunset.

“Nice house,” you noted as though you didn’t know.

“I think my mum will like you,” he laughed, grabbing your hand and pulling you along. With stammering words and failing footsteps you followed, tripping over various things (including your own feet) before you made it to the entrance.

Stone raised a few steps off the ground, the entrance lined with magnificently large pillar ordained with paintings, murals, and carvings, all etched intricately by artists many years ago. Guards stood in waiting, pacing the halls in shifts to keep the royal family safe. Torches also lined the walls, and burning incense filled every room with intoxicating white smoke.

“Fancy,” was all you said as he took you to his room.

“A little,” he said, ignorant in his youth of the poverty the people he would one day rule were even now facing.

His room was just as fancy, gated with a large door that he had a little trouble opening. You helped, and with that you saw the grandness of his own quarters.

“That,” he pointed across the hallway to the opposite door, “is my older brothers room. I wouldn’t go in there if I were you.”

You nodded, thinking mostly about royal succession. Ahkmen would, if all went according to plan, not become pharaoh. Turning to your left, you were caught completely by surprise by a new piece of architecture you had yet to see anywhere else.

“Wow! What is that?” You asked, rushing out to the platform that jutted out from the rest of the building. Around it was a railing, keeping you from falling off, and from there, you could see the world. In the distance, the sun had just disappeared over the Aur.

“It’s a balcony?” He said, pushing past the billowing curtains you hadn’t even noticed before to stand beside you.

“It’s a beautiful view,” you sighed, breathing in the cool air.

“Yeah, it’s nice,” he replied.

+

“You’re quite smart,” he commented one day, a few months after your first meeting. He’d taken a shine to you, and you him, and you felt it to be the start of a wonderful, first friendship. “Especially for a baby.”

“I’m not a baby,” you grumbled, crossing your arms as he made his move in the game in front of you.

“Yesterday I tried to give you shoes and you didn’t even know what they were!” He laughed, leaning against his hands as you examined his move and strategy. You pouted, thinking mostly about how you were most certainly not a baby.

“Lots of people don’t know about shoes,” you said in quiet defense.

“But you must’ve seen them around? Maybe on your mother, or father?”

“I don’t have either of those,” you answered on instinct, a sudden pulse of fear going through you before you remembered it’d probably be better if you left it at that. In your child, human form that was always growing, you couldn’t say you had a family. You didn’t, except Bastet and Maahes, and people knew who those gods were.

“What about a brother or sister?”

“Neither,” you said, making your decision and moving the piece.

“No home then,” he murmured, and suddenly the game in front of you was forgotten.

“I stay at my temple,” you said, thinking there to be no actual reason to really hide your identity. Maybe it was your child brain kicking in.

“Your temple?”

“Yeah, I’ll show it to you sometime soon!”

You smiled, and awkwardly he returned it, and the game continued. Eventually he won, having been playing the game longer than you had.

Despite the fact that you’d been staying in the palace for several months, you had yet to run into his parents or his brother. He kept it that way, leading you away from more common corridors, grabbing your hand and bolting out of the room if any of his relatives seemed to be nearby. You never asked him why, as it always felt like an adventure, your heart pounding as you giggled, breathless on the floor after a sprint.

The many near abandoned hallways became well known to you, often unlit and uncleaned. Filled with old carvings and paintings from when they were once used frequently, before the building had been extended to fit more pharaohs and more gods. You didn’t mind in the slightest, coming to enjoy the feel of empty spaces filled with only your conversation with Ahkmen.

You had a temple, offerings, sacrifices. You had respect. An adult body. Godly powers. Sometimes you wondered why you chose to live within the palm of his hand. Then he’d grab your hand, pull you along, and you forgot to question yourself, only existing to laugh with him.

The day eventually came where he brought up the previous subject again.

“You said you’d show me your temple.”

You nodded.

“Haven’t done that yet,” he commented, earning a glare from you.

“Let’s go then,” you suggested, beckoning him away from the palace garden filled with greenery, through the hallways till you came to the streets, winding your way through before reaching the familiar alabaster steps of your temple. Cats still lounged freely outside, purring in the warm sun.

“Tajahul’s temple?” He asked, walking up the steps, you trailing behind.

“Is that what they’re calling me now?” You giggled as one of the cats rubbed his cheek against you.

“It’s a nice name. Not right I’m guessing,” he said as he rubbed his palm against one of the tall pillars.

“You know my name.”

“Mahjur? Shouldn’t this be the temple of Mahjur then, not Tajahul?”

“Yes, but I never gave my name, so it’s understandable.”

“I could tell my father,” he said, looking at you as he sat down. You sat beside him, cross legged as you both leaned against a pillar.

“Actually,” you said after a moment of quiet thought, “that’d be nice.”

“I’ll tell him I had a dream or something,” he plotted, a scheming look on his face.

“You mean lie?”

“I don’t really feel like telling him my new best friend is a new god.”

You snorted, covering your mouth as you laughed.

“Probably not,” you sighed.

That evening you were introduced to the rest of a terribly dysfunctional family. Not as a god, but as a friend. The whole table was set like a typical feast, and though your eyes widened as you entered the room, Ahkmen’s stayed relatively the same, so you safely assumed this was like any other dinner. Surrounded by guards and servants and fan wavers who all looked delighted to be serving their king.

The king, overall, looked bored, paying little attention to anything beside his food. The queen seemed concerned, glancing at her husband, only catching sight of you when she finally turned to face her two sons.

By sheer power of luck, the king was so disinterested in everything that wasn’t on his plate that Ahkmen could easily slip in the fact that you were staying in his room and have close to no reaction from his father. His mother didn’t seem so quick to accept it, but after seeing her husbands’ reaction, seemed a little more relaxed.

His brother sitting next to you said nothing.

+

Your friendship spanned many years after that. Over those many years, you hadn’t had one fight, agreeing to do terribly reckless things together. Each time, without fail, neither of you were punished. Unfortunately, you had sort of become the pharaoh’s third child - at least that’s how everyone treated you. However fortunately, the throne was not going to you. Never to you. Actually, you had suspicions it was going to your friend.

Kahmuh, which you learned was the brothers name, was in all essence of the word vile. Not even truly cruel or barbaric, merely childish in a way that made him unfit to be the royalty he was. Constantly screaming and killing slaves (a habit his parents tried to break him off, unsuccessfully, of course).

In every field you’d run through Ahkmen had been by your side, or you by his, sailing boats down the Aur and watching sunsets from his windswept balcony. The whole world was a newfangled wonder, a toy right in the palm of the pharaoh’s hand, and by extension, his sons’. Only his youngest son.

You found yourself feeling sorry for the older brother, the king to be, having to deal with a sibling far more successful and well liked than him. One evening, when Ahkmen was around 13 years old (and you around three years old, technically), you attempted to speak with him. Immediately he forced you out of his room, and you saw where his parents got their disappointment from.

“Don’t worry about him,” Ahkmen had told you later that night, his arm over your shoulder in a comforting manner. “He’s just odd.”

After that you payed little attention to his antics.

That was two years ago, that night you decided that maybe Ahkmen was the only friend you could have in the life you had chosen. Not that you would ever complain, life was a luxury you could afford to enjoy with him beside you.

A few days before his fifteenth birthday, the Pharaoh offered to take him on a sedan ride, to waltz him around town. At Ahkmen’s apprehension, the Pharaoh quickly explained how well guarded it’d be, how there would be fan wavers, and he could have every need attended. Not that he didn’t get that every day.

“Can I take Mahjur along?”

You looked up from your carving, a technique you’d been trying to recently perfect. It wasn’t going well.

“Yes, of course,” the Pharaoh said with a smile, nodding to you. You nodded back, a more bow of your head. He left after that, his hands folded behind his back as his guards followed him out of the room.

Ahkmen came up beside you, leaning against the wall and sliding his back down till he hit the floor.

“You’d almost think they forgot I picked you up off the streets,” he laughed, his head pressed against the back of the wall as he looked up, his eyes closed.

“Off the river, dearest,” you reminded him, your voice aloft from your concentration.

“What are you carving this time?” He looked over your shoulder, squinting his eyes.

“Trying to work on a face.”

“That’s a face?”

“It’s not done!” You whined, pulling the tablet out of his sight.

“I could teach you how to do hieroglyphs,” he suggested, leaning against you again anyways.

“It’s a bit fancy, isn’t it?” You said, still trying to concentrate.

“Come now, my parents are designing something and you could help them,” he said as he stood, pulling you up with a forceful tug of your arm. Your tablet clattered onto the floor, along with your carving tools.

“If you broke one of those, you owe me a new one,” you said glaring at him.

“Not a problem,” he laughed.

The next morning you did not take him up on his offer. You had a sedan ride that day, and though he’d requested for you to come along, you were reluctant. Slaves never settled very well with you, but Ahkmen insisted they were servants. Paid. You relented your pushing.

What was failed to mention was the exact number of chairs available for the ride. Apparently it was strange for a Pharaoh to own more than two at a time, so him and his wife could ride comfortably. Any more would indicate weakness, or something - you weren’t really listening, mostly caught up in the fact that you were now subject to several miserable hours out in the heat sitting right next to Ahkmen, all squishes up in that terribly heavy looking chair.

“It won’t be that bad… we’ve got fans,” he said awkwardly, shrugging as he looked just as uncomfortable with the thought.

“You’re wearing three layers and a wig. I’m wearing shoes. I hate shoes,” you hissed.

“You’re also wearing two layers of clothing, guilty party,” he retorted back with the terrible nickname, still glowering at you as he was seated.

“I -“

“Now come take a seat next to your husband,” he said with a smirk, patting the space next to him.

“One of these days,” you growled.

“Ah! Who’s the prince?”

You sat next to him, your arms crossed and shoulders tight as you both squirmed at the proximity.

“I’m not going to enjoy this.”

“No one said you had to,” he replied, sliding right into you as the chair was lifted onto the backs of eight people. You winced as you looked down, then in front of you, where the Pharaoh was being marched on a golden throne, surrounded by fans and guards.

“I suppose this is your day,” you sniffed, turning away.

“Thank you nedjem.”

“Don’t call me that.”

The heat of simply being next to him began creeping up your body all day, starting first at the thighs where you touched, whispering up your body, persuaded by the currents of the suns heat. Up to your hips, through your stomach and shoulders before burning into your cheeks, your already red face turning hotter.

“You look awful,” Ahkmen noticed halfway through the day, looking over with a concerned look.

“You look like a dream,” you mumbled, feeling like you were melting through your clothes. Certainly it couldn’t be that hot, right? And the heat wouldn’t explain your heart going haywire in your chest. It wouldn’t answer the weird numbness of your legs or the shaking of your hands, unless… you were having a heat stroke. That must’ve been it.

“No, really, let’s stop off somewhere, alright?” He put his hand on your cheek, testing how hot you’d turned, his face close up to yours.

You swallowed thick, turning away.

“I’ll be alright. We’re stopping at the temples, remember? I’ll be fine.”

“… Okay,” he said, looking like it was the furthest from what he believed but complying anyway.

In a few moments your breathing became under your control, the numbness fading into background fuzz and the shaking stopping all together. If you had, perhaps, been born somewhere near the year 2000 and gone to school, you would’ve had the experience and knowledge to identify what was a panic attack due to a crush. However you’d been born in Egypt, certainly not in the year 2000, and you had been born around three years ago. There was no telling what a panic attack was. Or a crush.

The day of his birthday you didn’t take him up on his offer to teach you hieroglyphs either, swept up in the chaos of the party. You were excited mostly for the music, till Ahkmen explained to you about the specialness of this specific party.

“My parents are bringing in a lot of wine for the adults. I haven’t been able to have it yet, but I bet it’s delicious. And,” he put his hands on your shoulders, staring intensely into your eyes and making you sweat, “I think we can steal some.”

“Wine? Why won’t they let you have any?”

“Apparently large doses of it make you a little dizzy, I’m not sure, but -“

“You do remember who I am, right?”

“I’m sorry?”

You hadn’t ever explicitly said you were really a god, not in a way of, “hey Ahkmen, I’ve been your friend since I was born, isn’t that weird because we met when we were both ten? Well I was born about four months before that point. I’m a god,’ instead more hinted at and replied to in a way that made it clear to, at least you, that you were a god.

“I can just summon wine if you want it,” you said, frowning. This solution was so blatantly obvious to you, but Ahkmen hadn’t ever shown interest in drinking wine.

“Yes I know, but it’s so much more fun this way!” He smiled wide and chaotic, rushing down the hall in his new, golden cape. You followed in your silver necklace, dangling low on your stomach, an expensive gift by your friend a few years ago.

Peeking your head past the corner and into the kitchen, you saw the bustle of chefs preparing food for the upcoming feast. Servants swarmed, perfecting the platters and carrying them out. Off in the distant corner, in a large water basket, sloshed red as blood wine.

“That’s a lot of wine,” Ahkmen gasped, his jaw dropped as it took a few servants to set it in the right place.

“That’s heavy,” you mumbled along with his amazement. “What’s your plan?”

“My plan?”

You nodded.

“Yes, uh, my plan. Well, um… they’ll have pretty much unlimited wine for the party, right? So we just wait for all the adults to get too dizzy to see us and then we sneak in and take a little!”

That was a terrible idea for actual results. No shock factor when the adults found it empty, no finesse except deceit, and there was always the chance that it’d be drunk dry before anyone got too dizzy at all.

“Alright,” you agreed anyway with a shrug of your shoulders, thinking it’d probably be safer if the two of you didn’t drink in the first place. Then again, you’d heard pretty good things about wine from your visits with your brother.

“Let’s go then!” He whisper shouted, careful not to be caught by the chefs as he bolted out, followed by a jumpy you.

It didn’t take long till the two of you were sat together at the head table, gorging on bull and bread, honey cakes and jujubes. All of it utterly delicious, but you still kept eyeing each other, attempting silent signaling for when either thought everyone was drunk enough. The plan was simple, gone over as the two of you ran to the table. Sneak back into the kitchen, there was a whole vat of it there, and all the chefs and servants would be too busy serving everyone to notice.

“This is going to be so much fun,” he giggled, the two of you kneeled side by side, watching the kitchen door from a safe distance.

“Take your cape off, it’s getting in the way,” you mumbled, already undoing the material falling from his shoulders.

“Hm. I thought it looked cool,” he said as he beckons you, slipping past the leaving chefs.

“It does,” you whispered into his ear, your hands on his shoulders as you stood behind him, scanning the room as you kept low.

Keeping close to the furniture you made your way, making sure that no server was coming to refill their cups for serving. Once you realized all of the servers had gotten a refill you jumped, opening up the wicker lid as he grabbed two large cups.

“Aren’t these for serving?” You asked, playing with it in your hands.

“All I could find, hurry up!” He hissed, dipping his own in and pulling it out, running out of the room as soon as you’d done the same.

The two of you giggled all the way back to his room, as though you’d committed a heinous crime you’d never get punished for. In your mind and his, you surely had. You wondered, sitting on his balcony as the stars reflected in dark red wine, if you’d ever get caught. With your legs dangling, you wondered if you’d ever tire of him.

“Do you think you even can get dizzy from this?” He asked, looking at you with a curious frown.

“What, just because I’m a god means I can’t have fun?”

“No, just… biologically speaking.”

You hummed, raising your eyebrows and wondering just as he did.

“Considering Sekhmet could, I think so, but... let’s find out.”

The rest of the evening was spent in an alcoholic haze. Turned out you could get drunk, much to the joy of Ahkmen and the surprise of you. You’d thought with being a god perhaps it’d take it at least a little bit easier on you, but to no avail. When you woke up the next morning, your headache was just as bad as his, and neither of you could recall how you ended up in each others clothes.

“You know, my clothes don’t look that bad on you,” he commented with a smirk, biting his lip in a funny looking way.

“Shut up, will you?” You had huffed.

+

It wasn’t until a few weeks that you took him up on his offer to teach you hieroglyphics. In that time, you’d looked back at the different ones adorning every surface of the palace, finding them to be a sort of art. Your growing interest and his parents beginning to shower him with far too much attention to punish his insolent brother made the both of you desperate for some excuse to spend some alone time together.

“What am I designing anyway?” You asked as he sat you down at the table in his room, papyrus and pen in front of you.

“Not yet. That’s for when you can actually write in this,” he said, giving you another sheet of papyrus with the whole of the main hieroglyphs on it.

“Yikes,” you said, pulling the sheet closer to you. “That’s a lot of drawings.”

“It gets worse!”

“Fantastic, why am I learning this again?”

“Don’t you want to help with my parents design, nedjem? I heard it’s going to be for me,” he teased, nudging you with his shoulder.

“Everything they make is for you,” you sighed, rolling your eyes as he began the lesson.

It started at one lesson per week, but in a second that was decided it wasn’t enough time, so it was upped to one lesson a day. Then his parents came swooping in even more, his brother beginning to target terrible pranks on him and you, and relatives tried to earn his favor so badly seeing as he was the favorite, that he begged you for two lessons a day.

“Three,” you said.

“Yes,” he sighed, a relieved smile bright on his face.

Three lessons a day and you began to get the hang of it quickly, what each image symbolized and how it worked as not an alphabet but an art. While most of your days were spent inside at his table, going over things and learning how to stroke in just the right way, sometimes he’d take you out. Around town, no guards, the both of you adorned in more common clothing, though you insisted on keeping your gold neckband.

“Didn’t they teach you this stuff in, I don’t know, god school?” Ahkmen leaned against the wall, his arms crossed as your finger pressed into the painted hieroglyphs carved in the walls.

“I was born with holy knowledge. My mother filled in many human traditions. But language is so fleeting to gods, she didn’t think it was important to teach me this formal writing.”

“That’s dark,” he mumbled uncomfortably.

“Oh.”

“I don’t like it.”

“Learn to,” you chuckled, looking over at him to find him smiling right at you. Grinning, actually, a little dreamy like. You snorted, shaking your head as you read out what they were saying. Mostly stories, talking about your own relatives or other gods. A whole lot of Ra.

On the walk home, the sun barely touching distant hills, you confronted what it was you were really learning this all for.

“Could I know what this tablet that I’m doing is?”

“My father is making a tablet out of gold. It’s supposed to be connected to Khonsu. We were both wondering if you could do the design; he thinks you’re artistic, I think you’ve got connections so you could use some extra special hieroglyphs or something. What do you think?” He asked, standing shoulder to shoulder with you just as always. He was beginning to grow taller.

“Sounds good. However I don’t think I can call up Bastet for what will probably sound like a school project to her,” you laughed, and he nodded with a chuckle.

“I understand. I’m sure he’ll like whatever you come up with either way.”

After that day you had considerably less time on your hands. The lessons had stopped, yes, but the Pharaoh had decided his sons, and you, needed training. Specifically weapon and hand to hand combat training, ‘just in case,’ as he put it. Out of the three of you, Kahmuh was probably the most excited, and you the least. How could you be the deity of innocence if you were off punching people in the nose?

You didn’t argue with it though. Of course, you and Ahkmen complained to each other behind closed doors, but never to his fathers face. That’d be certain death. When Kahmuh joined you, ranting about how ridiculous this whole thing was. Even if he was the most excited didn’t mean he was at all looking forward to it. It was out of the three of you, meaning the standard for most excited was quite low.

“It’s foolish! We’ve got guards! I’m going to have at least fifty guards surrounding me at all times when I become Pharaoh!” Kahmuh exclaimed, pacing in front of you and Ahkmen as the two of you sat against the wall.

“Besides, that teacher he’s having teach us? I’ve heard terrible things about him,” Ahkmen added, crossing his arms.

“Really?” You leaned forward to look at him better. “What sort of things?”

“He’s really strict, supposedly,” he said.

“And ugly. Violent too, I bet,” Kahmuh growled.

“I thought you liked violent,” Ahkmen said, shifting his position.

“Against you? Yes. But against me it’s horrific. I won’t stand for it,” he hissed, marching out of the room. You and Ahkmen looked at each other, brows raised in a questioning stance.

“What a funny man,” you said.

“If you could call him a man.”

“Oh,” you tutted, elbowing him gently. “Don’t be rude.”

The next day, bright and early the three of you found yourselves in a large, stone courtyard. Laden with statues and pillars, standing taller than the heavens and glaring down at you. You stood in a straight line, chests puffed out and hands at your side.

Neither of them had been joking when they’d said that this instructor man was ugly, and though he hadn’t said a word, he looked very violent, and the way he jammed his staff into the ground showed just how strict the next few months would be.

“You three are used to a pampered life,” he finally said, starting off his speech like any stupid fighter would. “And I - I didn’t know there were three of you.”

“Does this mean I can leave?” You asked, still keeping your position.

“No! Now, do any of you have any basic weaponry training?”

“I’ve stabbed a few people,” Kahmuh said, looking particularly and unsettlingly bright. You knew all too well he was remembering all those slaves he murdered… or maybe Ahkmen had embellished the story.

“Hasan jiddaan,” the instructor said in a cooler voice. “My name is User.”

“Typical,” Ahkmen whispered to you as his back was turned. You almost snorted before remembering you might get caught.

User went on to explain the rules of combat, of fair play, and how to maintain an upper hand while playing cool. He kept you intrigued, though your feet hurt from prolonged standing, and he kept his voice quick and sharp. To the point.

Once he had fully tired all three of you out with his lecture on ethics in battle to the point where at least three or four hours had passed, he gestured to the rack of weapons behind you.

“There you’ll find bows, spears, daggers… maces. I want you to pick one that you’ll master.”

Your fingers danced across the rack, deciding spear and dagger were too violent for you in a bloody way. The maces had beautiful designs, colored gold and black, but still too violent.

“There’s a sling down here,” you noticed, crouching down and tugging on Ahkmen’s skirt.

“I don’t think we’re supposed to choose from that shelf,” he mumbled, picking out a bow and returning to his position. Looking to your left, you saw Kahmuh had already picked out a long, black dagger.

“User,” you called, “can I pick a sling?”

“Yes,” he answered simply, and you grabbed it, standing back in line.

While you and Ahkmen fiddled around with your newfound weaponry, User grabbed Kahmuh for a more private lesson.

“This’d be so much easier if you all just picked the same weapon,” you heard him grumble as he pulled the older away.

“What do you suppose we do now?” You asked, sitting on the floor with your legs splayed out in front of you.

“We could fight each other.”

“That sounds horrible. I could never hurt you.”

“Even if I hit you first?”

“Never,” you said with finality, crossing your arms.

“Look at you. You look like a pouting child,” he laughed, crouching beside you.

“And - and you look like a, uh,” you turned to look at him, coming nose to nose with his smiling face.

“Like a what, darling?”

“Like a - a very handsome, very spoiled prince,” you attempted your insult weakly, having it fall flat as he smiled even wider.

“Why thank you.”

“Would you stuff it?”

“Oh come now,” he grunted as he sat beside you, leaning his hand against your shoulder uncomfortably as he was now taller than you. “I didn’t mean it.”

“I didn’t either,” you mumbled.

“You didn’t mean that I was handsome?” He asked, looking up at you with wide, doe eyes.

“You’re absolutely awful, I hope you know that,” you hissed, feeling your face shoot up to the temperature of the sun.

“I do, you remind me every now and then. You still love me though,” he laughed, resuming his relaxed position on your shoulder.

“Sure,” you mumbled, fumbling with the sling in your hands.

The classes from that day forth weren’t as tiresome as they were annoying and dragged out. Why the two others had to wait while one person got their lesson was beyond any of you, but it did bring you closer in shared pain. It was usually right before lessons that Ahkmen and Kahmuh got along the most, whining and grumbling to each other about how sore they were from their previous lessons as you stayed behind them. Other times they returned to their fierce sibling rivalry.

Eventually, once you’d gotten a handle of your weapons, you started on hand to hand combat. That was less fun, the repetition of moves boring the hell out of all three of you as you all punched the air in unison.

“This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever done. I’ve never felt more humiliated,” Kamuh whined.

“Really? This outranks the time you slipped in the mud and flew about fifty feet down that hill and into the Aur?”

“Would you stop bringing that up?”

Then came the sparring. Months after the lessons had originally started User thought the three of you were ready enough for one on one sparring, practice for real life battle. It was certainly interesting, watching the two brothers fight in an arena meant for fake fights. The way they fought always felt far too real, their punches too strong and succinct.

“Kahmuh, relax, I think he’s done,” User stopped his movements with a flick of his hand. Ahkmen was on the ground, backing up from his brothers punches as he kneeled above him. You sat at the edge, eyes wide as you willed yourself away from interfering.

“Take a break, Ahk. Mahjur, face Kahmuh,” he said, beckoning you from your place. You swallowed thick, readying yourself as you stood face to face with the boy who had a violent fire alight in his eyes, a residual burning from the attack he had just done.

Once User raised his hand to begin, Kahmuh launched at you, immediately going for a punch to the face. You blocked, throwing his hand off and attempting for a jab to his gut. While he kept his hands in fists, you kept yours straight, for more of a sharp motion than a blunt. You hit your mark, and as he keeled over in just the slightest way you kneed him in the chin. A dirty move, but he stepped on your foot after it, and considering he wore sandals and you didn’t, it hurt a lot. Still you kept your ground, attempting to block every one of his moves and trying to hit some of your own.

Sure, if you used your godly powers the boy would be dead in a second, but that wouldn’t be much fun for any of those present.

Eventually, due to his sheer skill in fighting he won, throwing you to the ground with a sweep of your legs. User stopped the fight from continuing right at that moment, instead of letting Kahmuh finish it as he had last time.

With deep breaths you hauled yourself to sit next to Ahkmen again, puffing your hair out of your face.

“Intense,” you huffed, leaning against the wall.

“I have a feeling these next few weeks are going to be torture,” he mumbled in reply.

“Hey, look on the bright side. If we get better, we can beat him up!”

User, in all his wonderful mercy, let you rest before calling you up again, standing you in front of Ahkmen. He raised his hands, and neither of you did anything, completely confused.

“Hey!” He snapped his fingers in front of your faces. “Start!”

“What?” Ahkmen looked between you and User, just as confused as you were.

“This is a sparring arena. Why do you think you’re in it?” User glared at him.

“You want us to fight? Each other?” You asked, eyes wide and mouth hung open in astonishment.

“Yes!”

You burst out laughing, followed in succession by Ahkmen, who held his stomach as he belted out a laugh.

“We’re not going to -“

“Now!” User snapped, and you jolted back into position, looking warily at your friend. He sniffed, eyeing you as if to say he’d take it easy.

You moved first, aiming a weak punch at his chest that he easily blocked. In return he attempted a hit just as weak as yours at your shoulder, something you learned could disarm. You dodged, successfully hitting the side of his stomach with your elbow. When you hit, he laughed, and you felt yourself get into the motions once more. Hit, but not too hard, dodge, and prove yourself to be better. Thinking of it more as a competition than an actual fight helped you as you moved.

When you tried to land a blow to his shoulder, he grabbed your wrist, and in a flash he twisted it behind your back. You gasped in pain, barely even feeling his other arm pressing your back against his chest. However, you could feel his heart beating fast, beating right into your skin.

“Ahkmen wins that round. Good job - go get cleaned up. We’re done for today,” User said, dismissing the three of you.

As you walked the steps back up to the palace and hopefully to the baths, Kahmuh gloated his victory.

“Wow, you won against two people who couldn’t care less about fighting,” you said sarcastically, waving your hands like it was a big deal.

“You’re just jealous,” he said in a stiff manner, sticking his nose up in the air and running ahead of you.

Slowly, you and Ahkmen made your way into the bathing room, being greeted with steam clinging to your skin and servants at your hand.

“Come, let’s bathe together,” he asked of you, tugging the wrist he had twisted earlier. You winced as he pulled, stumbling closer to him.

“Why?”

“Well we can certainly see each other easier then.”

You shrugged, agreeing. Most of the people you’d met were casual about nudity, but for some reason you couldn’t find yourself sharing the sentiment. It was the reason you wore a cover over your shoulders and chest as well as your legs. All of that was stripped before you got into the tub, sinking into the warm water with a relaxed sigh, feeling the alkaline and juniper perfume relax your muscles and sore bruises.

With closed eyes you hardly noticed Ahkmen slipping in opposite you, sighing in a just as relaxed way as you did.

“See? Isn’t this fun?” He giggled, leaning forward and putting his hand on your lower leg.

“Something along those lines,” you mumbled, sinking deeper into the water to mask your reddening face. A servant pulled you up by your shoulders, tugging the wig off your head to tend to your actual hair which was much shorter. You looked away from your friend, feeling embarrassed to have him see you like that. Usually you didn’t bathe together, so it was rare that he saw you without the wig.

Ahkmen’s hair, in your opinion, was much more attractive than the wig he wore. Sure, it was short, but it was lighter and curlier, and sometimes you felt the urge to push your fingers up into it. Just to test how soft it was, because at least it looked soft.

“Here,” he said suddenly, opening his hand out to you.

“What?”

“Your wrist!” He grabbed your bad wrist, pulling at it again and making you wince. “Sorry,” he mumbled, dipping his fingers into a bottle of honey and slathering your wrist in it.

“People say it’s supposed to help,” he drawled sweetly as servants tugged at his hair, pouring water over his head. You watched, blood running thick through your veins as they did so, feeling his touch on your wrist far more intensely than you should have. “I don’t know how much I believe that, but it couldn’t hurt. Probably.”

You hummed a distant agreement, barely feeling your own hair being tugged from your scalp.

“I’m sorry for hurting you,” he apologized, looking up at you with those doe eyes of his.

“We were fighting. It’s not your fault,” you said, feeling the hands leave your head as the servants departed for a moment. He nodded, silent for a moment before speaking.

“Mahjur, you’re… a god. Do you… do you know much about, uh, sex?”

You choked on your own saliva. No, you absolutely did not. Your mother may have been the goddess of fertility but so were fifteen other gods and goddesses and you were not among their ranks.

“Actually I know nothing. Nothing at all. Why?”

“Mm. No one’s bothered to talk to me about it, but I pick stuff up. I think it starts with kissing.”

“Sounds fun,” you said, feeling like you’d rather be anywhere else in the world.

“I wouldn’t know, haven’t done it yet.”

“Really? Aren’t you fifteen?”

“Shut up, would you?”

“Anyway I’m…” you rubbed your wrist, “I’m actually surprised you didn’t break my wrist.”

“What? Why?”

“It’s made of porcelain. Not the best material for bones, but Bastet said she had to work with what she was given, and apparently that wasn’t much,” you sighed, leaning back in the tub.

“Why have you waited five years to tell me this? I could’ve killed you!”

“I just remembered it!”

He threw his hands up into the air with a loud groan, splashing you as he did so.

“Let’s get back to your room, you can yell at me there,” you laughed, grabbing a towel on the floor and drying yourself off.

“I’m not mad, I’m concerned,” he replied indignantly, grabbing his own towel.

“Alright, mother.”

“I’m not your mother!”

Back in his room, he continued to pester and fret over your newly remembered state of fragility. You continually tried to tell him you’d been fine so far, and that you had not yet died, but it did little to comfort him.

“But you could,” he insisted. “What would I do without my best friend?”

“Experiment by yourself, I suppose,” you suggested weakly, sitting on his bed as he paced.

“Experiment on what?” He asked cluelessly, looking at you wish his hands on his hips.

“With your - weird sex thing you were talking about earlier,” you said, waving your hand through the air and whining when you twisted your wrist wrong again.

“You’re implying that if you’re alive I’d experiment with you,” he said out of the blue, suddenly in front of you, stating his aim clear as day.

“Wh - what? I, ha, I don’t know about that, I, uh, just - I -“

“It’s alright if you didn’t mean that,” he said quickly. “I just thought it’d be easier to have someone with a bit of shared experience.”

Well, you did do practically everything together. Maybe this would just be another one of those firsts.

“Uhh… yeah, no, it’s fine. It’s alright, I just - I’ve still got weak bones.”

“I don’t think I’ll forget that anytime soon,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to your inner wrist. You hummed weak, high in the throat.

“I still don’t know anything about sex,” you told him as he took off your clothing.

“Neither do I. This is just - from all that weird porn stuff you see in the temples,” he said, putting your skirt and shawl in a folded pile along with his own clothing.

“You actually look at that stuff?” You asked as he pushed you down on the bed.

“Sometimes. It’s good art, you know,” he said, kissing your neck.

“Oh! Uh, I never, uh, mm, never really payed attention to it,” you mumbled, the words catching your throat when odd noises jumped from your chest and through your mouth.

“I’ll take you to see them sometime,” he said, his hands moving lower to your hips in slow caresses as his lips continued kissing at your neck.

“I think I’m good actually,” you laughed awkwardly, your whole body feeling like it was about to fly off at any moment. He chuckled against your skin, the vibrations having a calming effect on you.

“I still don’t know what I’m doing and, I don’t know if sex with a, uh, not human will be different. Do you have the same genitals as us?” He asked, still not knowing what female genitalia looked like.

“I… don’t know? Guess we’ll find out,” you shrugged.

“Just like with everything. Not one damn teacher around,” he rolled his eyes and laughed, moving his hand between your legs. Something sparked down there as he did so, warm and shocking.

“That - that’s good. For some reason,” you added awkwardly to the end, looking up at him. He smiled, moving more decisively as he leaned down to kiss your nose.

“We’re having fun,” you joked, watching as he palmed at his own erection.

“Don’t we always?”

“Not always. Remember when you pushed me into the Aur right as we were getting into the deep part?” You held back a moan as he circled some sort of hole you had down there.

“I’ve told you a million times and I’ll tell you again, it was an accident,” he said, his brows knitting together as he rubbed himself up against you.

“Oh,” you said, the sound involuntary as the new feeling came around you.

“Oh come on, I haven’t even put it in yet,” he frowned at you, wondering if you were alright.

“Put it in?”

“Yeah, like this,” he said, pushing his dick into you. The most incredibly, full feeling ran up your stomach, running sparks through your fingertips and eyelids as you shut them, a pleasant hum ringing in your throat. You barely processed him feeling just the same above you, leaning on his elbows right above you.

“Right. Put it in. That’s… that’s what that means,” you murmured, grinding your hips down.

“Ah, don’t -“ He grabbed your hips, stilling you. “Feels good. Just let me, uh…”

Turns out, neither of you really knew what to do. So he did what felt good; he pulled out and pushed back in, a weirdly wet sound coming from the motion.

“That sounds bad,” you commented, trying to push moans back down into your chest.

“Felt good,” he shrugged, repeating the motion, dragging hums and sighs out of both of you.

“Can’t argue with that,” you murmured, your lips barely on the skin of his shoulder as he continually thrusted into you, soft and gentle. The feeling of skin on skin alighted warmth within you, and you closed your eyes, enjoying the moment. You wondered for a moment if this meant that maybe you couldn’t be a god of innocence, but when he kissed your neck tenderly again, you decided there was nothing more innocent than childhood experimentation and love.

Could you say love?

+

“You probably can’t get pregnant,” he said as the two of you laid down on his bed, a few days after that evening spent together.

“Hopefully not,” you mumbled, scratching your head.

Love. It was such an intense word, so selfish and selfless, absorbing all your time and effort into the protection of just one person. The more you thought about it, you wondered if maybe you’d loved him the whole time. Of course, there many definitions of love, not just romantic, but you knew at this point that it wasn’t just friendship. Probably. Humanity was odd like that.

“Ahkmen?”

“Yes?”

“Have you ever been in love with anyone?”

“If I ever do, you’ll be the first to know.”

Because it’ll be with me?

You shook your head, pressing your lips in a thin line.

“I don’t think I even know what love is.”

“Of course you do,” Ahkmen said with a frown, sitting up. You looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to continue. “You love the water. The tortoises, and the grass, you love the sky. You love looking at art, and I know how much you love cats, and I’m sure you love your mother.”

“I do enjoy all those things. But is it enough to be considered love? How do I know what I’m feeling is really real? What if I really am some emotionless god?”

“Those are questions even humans ask themselves,” he comforted softly, scooting closer to you. “But… I think you do love those things.”

“Mm.”

“And you love me.”

Of course you did.

“I don’t like being an adult,” was what you said instead. You weren’t even adults yet, still at the ripe age of sixteen. Well, Ahkmen was sixteen. You were six. Technically.

“Why?”

“Too many complicated emotions.”

“Is this because I said you love me?” Ahkmen asked with a sigh, lying down beside you closer than he was before. “If it makes you feel better I love you.”

“As a friend, right?” You asked too fast for your own liking, looking over to make eye contact with him.

He shrugged.

“Why define it?”

You looked back up at the ceiling. Maybe he was right.

“Come now, we can’t spend all day in bed,” he said with a jump, patting your leg as he got to his feet.

“Please?” You asked, pouting.

“You’re such a baby.” He rolled his eyes laughing, dragging you off his bed. “There’s much we can do today. It’s been a while since we’ve gone through town, I want to get you something nice.”

You chuckled, coming to your feet and leaning tiredly on him.

“Okay, but I’m not agreeing to this because you’re getting me something. I just don’t want you to leave without me,” you sighed, trying to stand on your own. He put his arm round your shoulders, waltzing you out of the room.

“Lots to do, so little time!”

It was a surprisingly cool day. The sun didn’t hit quite as hard, though shining just as bright as usual. Cool breezes flew in from the north, and for a few hours during midday you were worried your wig would fly off into the distance. Luckily it stayed put, but you couldn’t say the same for your sanity.

He’d been so terribly close to you all day. Never mind the fact that you already stood uncomfortably close, verging on unbearable during hot days, but what was soft touches of knuckles brushing together was now your palm over his, from simple proximity. Not even from the actual act of holding hands, it was simply because he was standing so close to you it was near impossible to identify the difference between you.

“Should we go swimming?” He asked you, sitting on the edge of the boat, his legs dangling beside yours.

“Sounds dangerous. And it’s not very appropriate anymore,” his mother told him softly, not leaving her husbands side as she spoke. Ahkkmen looked at you, half rolling his eyes and half grimacing. You snickered, elbowing him lightly.

Later in the afternoon you trekked around down with his father, surveying temples and offering meager sacrifices which were more for show than actual use at this point. It wasn’t long till you came to your temple, and as Merenkahre did his duties, you and Ahkmen giggled in the corner.

“So - so there’s. There’s a lot of cats here,” he noticed, gesturing vaguely at the lounging cats. “Can - do you have a cat form?”

“I, in fact, do. It’s been a while actually. I’ll -“ his mother looked at you sternly, “I’ll show you later,” you finished.

The eventful day of town travel ended with a full meal, and a giggly trip back to his room.

“I haven’t felt this good in ages,” you laughed as the doors shut, feeling as carefree as you ever cold.

“Well there has to be a reason for that,” he fumbled, biting at his lips as he collapsed on a seat, staring up at the ceiling. You sat on the ground, watching him sort through his thoughts.

“I think I’ve got a magic penis,” he finally said, his voice far too serious to be joking.

“YOU DO -“ you hushed yourself in case anyone was walking by the room, “you do not have a magic penis, oh my gods,” you laughed, covering your mouth as your face turned red.

“How do you know? You can’t prove or disprove it!”

“No one has magic - you know!”

“Genitalia?”

“Yes! You’re out of your mind,” you said, shaking your head.

“I’m mad, you say?” He asked, furrowing his brow and looking at you skeptically.

“Yes indeed I do say,” you replied.

“Then let’s do something mad!” He laughed, loud and crazy in your face, a childish act. You couldn’t help but laugh along at his antics. He came to your level, pulling you up by the hands with a great heave.

“What do you suggest, then?”

“Get dressed in something lighter,” he said, pulling off his own golden necklace and putting in its’ place a sheer material over his shoulders. You stuttered for a moment, taking off your own shawl and wrapping a much thicker, scratchier material over your shoulders, putting on a shorter skirt. He then turned to you, pulling your wig off and his own with a soft smile.

“I still don’t understand what we’re doing,” you said as you walked down the empty hallways.

“I saw this beautiful cove off the side of the nile,” he finally informed you, grabbing your wrist and pulling you along quicker. You stumbled over your feet, sloppily catching up to his speed. You tried to stammer a reply but the heat of his fingers digging into your bones kept you from speaking.

Down from the steps you ran in unison, lit by a crescent moon that hung low and massive in the sky. Off in the distance the lights of the city shone like the stars, more lively and dancing than they’d ever be. Though you surveyed the mass of land out in front of you, all you could feel was the now searing heat of his hand in yours. It made you feel funny, if a little sick in the stomach. You swallowed, now training your eyes on the Aur, shining with star and moonlight.

Eventually your bare feet hit dirt and you continued down the path, tugging lightly at your wrist to get him to slow down.

“Getting tired?” He asked when the two of you stopped in the shade of a tree.

“I’m a god. A higher being. I outrank you by a thousand suns,” you panted, kneeling on the ground with the exhaustion from running.

“Yes, of course, darling,” he chuckled, kneeling next to you and kissing your temple. You grumbled, pushing him off, but he just laughed at you, waiting alongside you so you could catch your breath.

“You’re so rude. And no one besides me believes it!”

“That’s because I’ve mastered the art of deception,” he teased, hitting particularly hot breath on your cheek.

“Whatever you like to tell yourself at night,” you hit back, standing up with a deep breath.

“I don’t tell myself anything at night,” he sniffed indignantly. “I have you to listen to. You snore, you know.”

“So do you.”

“Fair enough. Let’s go!” He pulled you by the arm this time, making sure you kept up as the brush got more intensive, surrounding you in flush greenery lining the banks of the nile. When the dirt turned to mud he stopped pulling you, slowing to a walk as he took in continually deeper breaths of air.

“How that cloth has stayed on you is a mystery,” you panted, pulling at the back of the material on his shoulders.

“I have a pin. Not much of a mystery,” he giggled.

“We’ll never know the answer,” you said, ignoring his statement by pointedly turning your head away. He laughed, tugging you to the waters edge.

Sitting on a rock adorned with hanging vines you watched him. Dragging over the movements of his muscles as he stepped into the warm water, coming up to his knees till it began soaking his skirt. He then took off the shawl, tossing it your way, though you barely caught it, too enraptured with the way he seemed to glow in the light of the moon.

“Are you going to join me, or are you going to sit there?” He asked, smiling cockily at you.

“I think I’m good sitting here,” you said, coughing awkwardly.

“Come on, that’s no fun. I took us out here to do something fun and a little reckless.”

“I’d hardly call wading in the river something reckless.”

“My mother said not to, qualifies enough for me. Now come join me. Please?”

You glared at him, trying to force your way through those sweet eyes of his whenever he asked sincerely for something. Grasping tightly at the rock beneath you, you caved, slipping off it and into the short reaches of the water. Twisting back around, you set your own shawl on the rock

“One day you won’t get the things you want in life by begging,” you said playfully, letting him pull you deeper into the water, till it began soaking your own short skirt.

“Oh, but I’ll always get what I want from you,” he smirked, his hand on the side of your neck, his thumb stroking your jawline.

“I swear to the gods, one of these days I’m going to get you and it’ll look like an accident,” you said in turn, the both of you breaking into fits of giggles as you did.

“Relax, take in the moonlight! It’s a wonderful night,” he advised you, taking the both of you deeper in till the water almost came to your hips.

He wasn’t wrong. You didn’t even have to look around to know that, the feeling of cool water against your legs and the spritz of gentle mist and wind on your face.

“If someone steals our clothes,” you said, getting up close to him till your noses touched, “it’s your fault.”

“If someone steals our clothes I’d be happy to do a portrait,” he flirted, looking you up and down with flitting eyes.

“You’re dirty!” You exclaimed, making sure not to be too loud.

“Come here,” he entreated, smiling soft and pure, focused entirely on you.

“I’m already here,” you grumbled.

He moved in to kiss you, pressing his lips to yours like petals upon your skin. You closed your eyes, breathing in his perfume, wandering his body with your hands. As your hands came around his jaw he moved further into you, kissing deeper with a furrowed brow, grasping at your waist firmly.

“You’re very handsome,” you breathed out as you parted, his kisses trailing towards your ear.

“That’s quite a compliment coming from you,” he murmured, rubbing circles into your stomach with his thumbs. His hands dipped lower, tugging at your already low hanging skirt.

“I’m not having sex with you in the river,” you said firmly, laughing as he pouted.

“It wouldn’t be that bad,” he tried to convince you, pulling you closer so your hips met with his.

“It’s dirty.”

“I thought I was dirty,” he joked, kissing you when you just frowned. His tongue dragged across your bottom lip, pushing in when you parted just slightly. Following your gasp, he brought his knee in-between your legs, pressing up against your crotch.

“Ah, I, uh, guess I could, oh -“ he grabbed your hips, grinding you down on him, “I could make - make an excuse, but, uh, not in the - the water, I -“

“On the shore then? You want me to fuck you in the mud?”

“That’s vulgar!”

“It’s not wrong either,” he chuckled, dragging you back through the water and onto the black shore.

“That doesn’t mean you have to say it. And especially not like that,” you said, your voice digressing into a mumble as he began kissing your neck, pulling at the knot tying your skirt together.

“You loooove it,” he teased, smiling against your skin as you fingered at the edge of his skirt.

“I do not. I love you,” you murmured, feeling heat building up in your cheeks. He was silent, still sucking at your neck and clavicle.

“… You do?”

“Uh, yeah. Yes.”

He threw your skirt to the side, stepping out of his own, shoving his hips up against yours with a thick moan. You gasped at the sensation of him heavy against your stomach, pressing yourself back against the rock behind you.

“Ahk, please, I -“

You needed him to say something. Something to deny or return what it was you’d said, slipping past your lips like the moans now falling freely. But he just stayed silent, chasing the friction he desperately needed against you.

“How… how do you love me?” He asked, his voice rough and quiet as he continued thrusting.

“I - I don’t -“

He slipped himself between your thighs, thrusting at a faster pace that rubbed right against that wonderful spot. At that point you were pretty sure you didn’t have male or female genitalia (as you’d seen a naked woman recently), so you weren’t sure what to call everything down there. All you knew was that it electrified you, enthralling you in pleasure.

“I need you, I need you to tell me,” he gasped, biting into your sternum.

“Ah - mm, I don’t - I love you, I just,” you trailed off, almost jumping out of your skin when you felt him nudge against your entrance.

“Fuck it,” he growled, forcing your legs to wrap around his waist and shoving himself inside you. You let out an all too loud moan, the feeling off him thick and full inside you.

The two of you stood for a moment, gathering your breath and composing yourselves. He kept his hands on your thighs, helping you to stay where you were, nails digging into the sensitive skin. Your own arms were around his shoulders, pulling his chest closer to yours.

Then he thrusted, pushing himself in to the hilt, forcing another moan from your throat. Keeping you in place, your back on the jagged rock keeping you upright, he allowed his hand to come between your legs and begin rubbing you right where you needed it. He was beginning to know your body better than you did.

“Come on, finish with me inside you. I know how good you feel,” he mumbled, kissing your jaw in feather light touches.

“Ahkmen, I - you’re, ah, so good to me,” you gasped, trying not to let his thrusting get in the way of your speech, to little avail.

With a few more well angled thrusts you came undone, muffling your moans by pressing your face into his hair. A few moments after and he came as well, biting hard enough into your shoulder to leave a mark. You were left gasping, the rock scratching your back as the two of you slid to the ground.

“What kind of love?” He finally asked, still panting, but looking at you through hooded eyes.

“What kinds are there?”

“Lots,” he answered, an answer which disturbed you. “Familial. Friendships can be love. There’s… playful love. Obsessive. The point is, there’s lots of love. Romantic is one of them.”

You tried to shift in your position on his legs, feeling his cock drag inside you. Wincing, you gripped his shoulders.

“Could you pull out? I’m sensitive.”

“Oh, sorry. Yes,” he apologized, that familiar wet sound following him pulling out, one that you recognized now as sexual instead of weird.

He kept you in his lap, his hands on your hips to keep you close to him. Looking down at him, the moonlight barely shining through the cover of trees reflected in his wide eyes, looking up expectantly at you.

“I suppose I wouldn’t know how to describe it,” you finally settled for, an answer that was inadequate for both of you.

“Try describing how you feel,” he suggested, and with thought you complied.

“… Good, all in all,” you chuckled, looking down. “My heart beats fast, and I feel like all that I want in life is to make you happy.”

“You’ll have to be more specific than that, Nedjem.”

“I told you not to call me that,” you grumbled.

“But it describes you so well!”

“It absolutely does n-“

“Just continue with your feelings, please?”

You sighed, leaning your head against the boulder.

“I guess… I want to hold you. But that’s normal, so is the whole kissing thing… I don’t know how to make this more specific?”

“I don’t want to alarm you, but - that’s not normal. At all. Mahjur, are you in love with me?”

“I already said that!”

“No, I clearly remember that, but what it sounds like you’re telling me now is that you’re… romantically in love with me.”

You froze. Was that it? Was he correct? Moreover, if he was correct, how would that affect your relationship? You couldn’t let mere feelings get in the way of your friendship. He was your best friend. Your only friend. You hardly had time to think about what it’d be like when he died, less so if your friendship ended before hand. You couldn’t even begin to imagine that.

“Mahjur? Are you alright?” He asked, cupping your cheek. You stuttered, meeting his eye with shame.

The entirety of your thoughts seemed to escape you, as though your brain had decided to take a vacation, leaving only first instinct for you to act on.

You laughed. Loud, your hands curling into yourself as you did so, your eyes darting anywhere to avoid looking at him.

“Uh… Mahjur?”

“Me? In love with you?” You barked out another laugh. “Please. That’s not… realistic. In any way.”

“You mean you having a crush on someone you’ve known all your life, spent most of your nights with, and slept with several times is unrealistic?”

“Of course I don’t love you, not like that!”

“Well I do!” He finally yelled, his hand slapping onto his thigh with a sense of finality. Looking directly into your eyes, he seemed to burn with his own intensity, teeth grinding and fists clenched tight. You blinked, breath quickened as you examined him.

“Ahk,” you spoke softly, placing your hand on his cheek. He sighed, relaxing into your touch with closed eyes, calming himself. “Let’s go home. I think you need some sleep.”

He’s young, you told yourself. But so were you, that little voice in the back of your head nagged as the two of you put your clothes back on. He’s human, you tried to reason, but the voice just replied, asking if you were really any different. He held your hand, walking the trail back to the palace, his eyes trained on the ground.

A long silence stretched, in which you both consumed yourselves in thought, only kept sane by the touch you shared. Distant, but certainly there, warm and familiar.

Just acknowledge it.

You feel the same; would it really be that wrong?

You moved close to him till your shoulders touched, leaning into him and tightening your grip on his hand just barely. His lips quirked up into a small smile, pressing his own shoulder into you.

“My father asked me when you’ll be finished with that tablet design,” he said as the steps of the palace came in sight. You sighed tiredly, your back slumping.

“I haven’t even started on it. Who’s it supposed to be connected to again?”

“Khonsu. Can’t you remember?”

“Obviously not,” you laughed.

+

It wasn’t as though you were purposefully avoiding him for the next few weeks. You hadn’t meant to - you were just busy. Busy with his father mostly, designing that tablet and what it was meant to do. Something you weren’t allowed to know. Perhaps if he knew what you really were he’d be more patient and willing to tell you, but it wasn’t something he needed to know. Either way, the symbols you were designing unsettled you. Lots of imagery concerning eternity and death, so much so the thoughts began entering your dreams. What could the Pharaoh be planning?

Sitting on the floor of Ahkmen’s room, your back against the wall and your knees up, you fiddled with a small, stone figure. It was supposed to be a woman, but it didn’t look that much like it.

The door opened, and through it Ahkmen dredged himself through. He collapsed on the bed, turning his head to you with a tired expression.

“What’s been ailing you?” You asked, letting the figure dangle from your fingers, supported by a limp wrist.

“My mother is one hell of a party planner,” he grumbled, turning over onto his stomach and staring at the wall.

“What’s the party for this time?”

“Ugh… uh, I’m being anointed Pharaoh by my father. My mother insists that a celebration is in order, so of course she’s inviting everyone we know.”

“And the whole city.”

“And their cousins, yes,” he grumbled, turning to face you again. “What’s wrong with you?”

He must’ve noticed your own passive facial expression, twisted into a mild confusion.

“Your father.”

“Seems we’re both doing well,” he laughed. You chuckled heartlessly, rolling your eyes.

“Something of the like. That tablet of his is… confusing. And dark. Feels an awful lot like he’s about to do some very unsavory things.”

“Have you asked him what it’s about yet? He won’t tell me,” he said, stretching his arms out.

“I have. Hasn’t told me. It’s finished now, so it’s not my problem anymore.”

“I guess we’ll never know,” he shrugged.

“Isn’t it for you though? Shouldn’t you know?”

“It’s a surprise.”

You chuckled, placing the small statue on the ground and getting to your feet. Walking over to him, you collapsed next to him on the bed with a bright smile, linking your arms together. He scooted himself closer to you, breathing deeply as he dug his face into the crook of your neck.

“You smell nice,” he murmured.

“It’s your perfume,” you told him with a laugh.

“Mm. I have to say, I don’t think I’m going to enjoy being Pharaoh,” he said, changing the subject but remaining in his position, arm slung over your torso as he lay on his stomach.

“Why not, darling?”

“My father has hardly any time to spend with us, and he’s always busy with lots of boring stuff. Then I have to deal with my brother,” he grumbled, rolling his eyes as he mentioned Kahmuh.

“What’s wrong with him?”

“He’s always jealous! I mean, it’s not my fault our parents love me more, it’s really his. I - you know how he acts.”

“Atrociously,” you said.

“Exactly,” he agreed. “And it’s only going to get worse! Imagine his hatred for me, but tenfold.”

“He is the oldest. It’s technically his right for the throne,” you looked over at him, seeing him grimace, “but he, uh, definitely shouldn’t have it. A bit immature, isn’t he?”

“An understatement. Glad you understand,” he sighed, scooting ever closer to you till his lips pressed into the bare skin of your shoulder. Taking a deep breath, you relaxed, allowing yourself a midday nap.

+

In a few days time the palace was crowded with people, flooding with food and wine of the highest delicacies. You hung close to the wall, fortunately allowed to do that considering your status as ‘not royalty.’ Poor Ahkmenrah though, center of attention, was seated at the head of the table. No longer did he don the wig he’d worn so long, but in its place he wore a golden crown, rising high off his head and glittering in the light of the dying sun.

He glanced at you across the crowd, a half smile gracing his features. You just laughed, mocking his pain in a friendly way that he despised. With his head he gestured, asking you to come stand next to him. You sighed, shaking your head, but stood beside him nonetheless.

“Enjoying yourself?” You asked, keeping behind him.

“Not in the least,” he replied, continuing to keep his smile up to keep appearances.

“It’s a far cry from your birthday. When we first stole that wine,” you chuckled, trying to bring his mind off his nervousness and bring it to a happier memory.

“I’d say so. Now,” he grabbed two glasses, handing one to you, “we drink freely.” You clinked your glass against his, taking a sip from the sweet drink.

“Thank you, darling. How do you feel, now that all these people are your subjects?”

“Stressed? Uh - less so, with you,” he chuckled nervously, shifting his weight from foot to foot as he kept his gaze down.

“I’m glad I can be of help.”

Per his request you sat next to him, on his right. To his left sat his parents, and to your left was his brother. It had been a while since you’d even seen Kahmuh, though he seemed to hold the same amount of poison he had before, glaring and tense. For the most part, Ahkmenrah spoke to his parents, leaving you to stare out over the feasting crowd and deal with the negative energy pouring off of his brother like waves of hatred.

Ahkmenrah turned back to the crowd, his mouth open and brow furrowed. He turned to you, gesturing to his parents.

“They’re already making their tombs! They aren’t that old,” he hissed, leaning towards you as he half whispered the words.

“Doesn’t hurt to be prepared,” you tried to compromise. “Besides, doesn’t it take a while to build those massive things?”

“It’s still morbid,” he said, shifting uncomfortably in his seat, still frowning.

“Don’t worry about it. This is your night, love,” you said with a smile. He scoffed but smiled, grateful for your support.

Somewhere near midnight, it was clear how on edge he had gotten. People came up to him, paying respects, bringing offerings that showed the prosperity much of his city had. He wasn’t ever one for conversing with hundreds of people within the timespan of a few hours. Thus, an hour or so after midnight, he gripped your hand, pulling you away from the table and leading you down the old hallways.

“Your parents are going to -“

“They’re too drunk to notice we’re gone, so is everyone else,” he said quickly, his voice low and clearly annoyed. Just from that you could tell how stressed he was, clinging to your hand far too tight and pulling you along in an almost painful way.

You stopped trying to talk to him, stopped pulling at your held hand, allowing him to drag you down the hallways till you came to his room. Flinging open the doors he pulled you inside, shutting the doors and collapsing against them.

“Wow,” you said, sliding down the door to sit next to him. “Someone’s not feeling very good.”

“It’s just a lot. I’ll be fine,” he muttered, rubbing his face with his hands.

“Aww,” you tutted, snuggling in beside him, wrapping your arm around his shoulders and your hand on his arm.

He hummed discontentedly, shuffling closer to you and resting his head on yours. His crown dug into your skull, but you didn’t say anything, just letting him relax.

“I wouldn’t worry too much about the future. Everything’ll work out… and I’ll be with you,” you murmured, breathing slow and deep, closing your eyes as you dug your face further into his shoulder.

“Are you sure?”

“Don’t have much else to do,” you joked, feeling yourself grow tired.

His fingers came beneath your chin, tilting you upwards till he captured you in a soft kiss. You moved into it, shifting to a more comfortable position on your knees. He molded perfectly into you, warm and mellow in a soothing way.

“What would I do without you?” He mumbled, still keeping his lips right above yours.

“Probably try to become friends with your brother.”

“Yuck.”

You laughed, resting your forehead on his shoulder as he joined you, the vibrations of his laugh spreading from his chest to yours.

“A very apt word,” you giggled, pressing quick kisses to his cheek.

“Yes - mm,” he grabbed your cheeks, pulling you to kiss him on the lips.

You ended up just sitting beside him, half asleep for the next hour. For the most part you did not speak to each other, reveling in the silence that peace between two good friends brought. When your head drooped, obviously falling asleep, he spoke.

“Let’s get to bed,” he suggested quietly, moving you to your feet.

“I’m sure your parents and your subjects are waiting for you,” you slurred, leaning against him.

“And I’m sure they’re drunk. Bed time,” he chuckled, and the both of you collapsed on the bed.

“Take the crown off.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re going to wake up with a massive headache,” you said, tugging uselessly at it.

“Fine,” he said, pulling it off and setting it on the ground beside him.

Still fully clothed, you curled up next to each other, falling fast asleep in a half drunk, hazy state.

+

The sun hid just below the horizon when you woke, dragging yourself away from Ahkmenrah’s hold. He mumbled something incoherent, quickly falling back asleep. You smiled to yourself, kissing his cheek before you left to the balcony.

You could still hear shouts from around town, singing and joyful drinking echoing all the way up to the palace where you stood. Dusk rounded the corner, the sky just barely glowing, the curtains behind you billowing in the wind.

Beside you, Maahes appeared. You furrowed your brow, wondering silently why he was there. You hadn’t seen him in forever - maybe he wanted to talk.

But his eyes watered. They were red, and his mouth parted as he took a shaky breath.

“Mahjur,” he spoke, holding out his hand. “I am so sorry for this.”

“Sorry for what? Maahes -“

He grabbed you by the waist, restraining you, keeping you looking towards the city. Behind you the door creaked open, and you could hear Ahkmenrah stir with a quiet mumble.

“Good morning,” he said, sounding confused. “What are you doing here?”

All you heard was footsteps. The person who had entered did not speak, stepping closer to the bed.

“Wait, Kahmuh, I -“

You felt your heart beating faster. Faster, faster, and faster, beating out of its cage at a painful rate, cracking away at your resolve to stay complicit.

“No, what are you doing, please! Help!!”

“Everyone’s asleep, dear brother,” Kahmuh said in a low voice, and suddenly Ahkmenrah’s screams were muffled. A shimmering sound of a blade came from behind you and you twisted, elbowing and kicking your own brother wherever you could just to see. Only to help, you needed to get to him, needed it more than anything, and still -

A slashing sound echoed through the chamber. With a burst of strength you turned yourself and Maahes around, watching, drowning in your own helplessness as Ahkmenrah pushed his brother away, dragging his bloodied self out of the room. Kahmuh ran after him, pulling him back into his room and driving a black knife into the back of your friend, over, and over, and over again, muffling his dying screams with his other hand.

“Ahkmen, no!” You cried, jumping off the ground, pulling as hard as you could, cracking your own fragile bones as you pushed and pushed against your brother. But Maahes didn’t even have to use his full strength. He was strong, you were weak, and easy to hold back.

Even Kahmuh couldn’t hear you. Even as Ahkmenrah stopped flailing, resigned himself to being naught but a body in a pool of its’ own blood, he kept stabbing. Viciously, till the doors of the chamber opened, and the dreadful cry of his mother rang through the hallways, alerting guards and servants alike, calling her husband.

Only then you felt your throat hoarse with your screaming, your cheeks hot with tears and muscles tired from the strain. You couldn’t help it as you continued crying, still desperately trying to get to Ahkmenrah, hoping beyond hope that he was still alive.

You closed your eyes tightly, feeling tears burn through your skin, your nails digging into the arms of your brother. When you opened them, you were not where you were before.

Surrounding you were clouds, alight with a golden haze, and in front of you was your mother. It had been so long since you’d seen her, a rush of joy went through you before quickly dying. Grief had not yet struck you, but it wouldn’t be long till.

“Mahjur, my beautiful child,” she said, and you had almost forgotten how soothing her voice was. She gathered you in a hug and you melted, your tears staining her dress.

“My best friend has died,” you sobbed against her, catching a glimpse of Maahes standing to the side with a remorseful look on his face.

“I know. It’s not your fault,” she cooed, stroking your hair.

“Why did you hold me back?” You opened your eyes, referring now to your brother.

“I needed to. Divine intervention is not allowed in matters of life and death, but more importantly the latter.”

“I don’t even know what half of those words mean!” You cried, knowing full well what he meant. Maahes still shied away, closing his eyes as he watched you sob. “Send me back,” you begged.

“The spirits of the dead roam the earth,” Bastet spoke in a soft voice, pulling you away from her body so she could look at you. “Ahkmen will roam the earth incorporeally, till his tomb is completed, and Anubis and Ma’at have prepared his hearing.”

“His hearing?” You sniffed.

“The rite of passage.”

“Oh,” you said, recalling the afterlife once more. “I need to go back, he’s probably lost and confused.”

“Do what you must, darling,” your mother hummed.

When you blinked again you were back where you were before, facing the bedroom, standing on the balcony. Below you you heard soft crying, muffled by hands. Looking down you saw Ahkmenrah, his form fuzzy and transparent.

“Ahk?” You whispered, kneeling down beside him. His legs dangled off the edge, his head in his hands, the golden cloak he wore so often splayed out behind him. It glittered in the morning light, though still see through.

“Mahjur?” He looked up, sniffing, his eyes red and puffy with tears. His eyes widened, standing up and pulling you into a hug. To your surprise he did not go through you as you had expected, but he felt warm against you, as though he were still alive. Tender and tight you embraced him, burying yourself in his scent and hold.

“I thought I lost you forever,” you breathed out, tears pricking away at your eyes.

“I thought I left you behind,” he replied, just as choked up as you were.

“Let’s just say it’s been an emotional morning,” you said, kissing below his ear, moving to his cheek. He laughed, almost cheery, smiling bright as he held your face in his hands.

“I’ve never been more happy to see you,” he cried, kissing you on the lips.

“Not even after that lesson about granary?”

“You’re - unbearable,” he laughed, catching your tears with kisses.

You laughed, pulling him into another tight hug. He breathed deeply against you, holding you firm to him.

“Oh Mahjur,” he murmured, his face pressed into the crook of your neck. “What’s going to happen to me?”

“Uh… it’s a little… morbid,” you warned him, but he nodded, waiting for you to continue. “You need to wait till they bury your body in a sarcophagus. Then you… can do all that, uh, Hall of Two Truths thing.”

“Hopefully they bury me properly,” he muttered, frowning.

“You mean with that papyrus that holds all the truths?”

“Yes, I mean that,” he grumbled, his fingers fiddling with the material of your shawl.

“I wouldn’t worry too much,” you said, looking over the edge of the balcony. “You’re royal. I don’t think they’d forget.”

He looked over the edge as well, measuring up the height of the palace from where his room was situated to the ground below.

“Y’think we could survive that fall? I’ve always wanted to jump off here,” he finally said, giving you a mischievous smirk.

“We’re already dead. Can’t get much worse.”

He shrugged, grabbing your hand and pulling you off with him. You expected the wind to whip loudly around you, pulling at your clothes and biting your skin, but it was actually rather pleasant. Together, you drifted slowly downwards, holding hands all the way. With a laugh you looked over at him, finding him in the same state of delight.

The ground soon approached, and you landed with a feather light touch.

“Not quite as risky as I thought it’d be,” he said with a shaky breath.

“Let’s just be grateful you didn’t try it when you were alive, alright?”

Was it the appropriate time to be making death jokes? Either way you’d already said it. It didn’t seem to bother him too much either you noticed as he laughed, falling into you with his side.

“Oh my god, my parents,” he said suddenly, and you could feel the dread killing the joy he felt.

“They’ll be alright,” you tried to comfort, but in that short second he was already too far gone, clutching your shirt and staring into you with wild eyes.

“My brother! What are they going to think?!”

“Your brother?” You asked, furrowing your eyebrows.

“Yes! My brother, oh goodness, they’re going to be so worried! Do you think I could say good bye? Can they even see me?”

It hit you very suddenly, like a punch to the nose that knocked out all your senses, blocking your air. He didn’t remember how he died. How that was possible, how that worked you hadn’t the faintest idea, but you did clearly remember that he did not see his body. He was turned away. What could you say to him? The truth?

“I’m sure your brother will make a good pharaoh. If not, there’s always cousins. And your parents will understand. It’s hard, but they’ll understand.”

“Oh, dearest… do you think we could check on them?”

You exhaled sharply, unsure. You weren’t any more wise than him in your age, and even containing all the understandings of the musings of the universe, you couldn’t find an answer.

“I suppose it couldn’t hurt,” you said quietly, nodding just slightly. “But I think it’d be best to avoid your room.”

“Why?”

“Seeing your own dead body, I’m assuming, probably isn’t a nice experience.”

“Ah. Uh, you’re probably right,” he agreed, pursing his lips together, following your lead around the palace and back up the steps.

Around you people swarmed, but none saw you, multiple walking through you. You’d gone through the experience before, when Bastet was first showing you Kemet, but the feeling was new to Ahkmenrah. Upon the first person walking through him, a man in his golden years, he stopped, gasping and shivering.

“What was that?” He asked, turning to you with wide eyes, desperately wanting an answer.

“Not much - seems like that man just walked through you. You’ll get used to it, it’s normal.”

“It felt like searing heat,” he said with a frown, holding your hand once more and following you.

As you had guessed, the visit did little to really help him. He had gone hoping for closure but was left with more questions and needs than he had arrived with, wishing more and more with each step you took away from his sobbing mother, that he could simply comfort her. You held his hand tight, a reminder each time he looked back that he could do nothing.

It was an intense thing to go through at such a young age. Or so you presumed, you hadn’t ever thought about this - the in-between from life and death. Still walking among the living but not with them. But, maybe, it was something everyone expected. On the other hand it might’ve just as well been something that no one anticipated. Looking over at Ahkmen, he didn’t seem to be doing well enough for such questions. So, in silence you sat with him by the river side. Off in the distance to your left you saw the trees of the cove you’d been to with him. An emotional night, you remembered, but you tried to keep your thoughts on the present. Your friend needed you.

“What do we do till I’m… fully dead? Will you still be able to visit me?”

“One question at a time,” you laughed softly. “Concerning your first one, we can do whatever you want. Regarding your second question, I’m not too sure. I could ask my mother to pull some strings.”

“Who is your mother, anyway?”

“Same woman who made me. Bastet.”

“Ah, right,” he said, seeming to suddenly recall the various hints you’d dropped. “Do you think we can still have sex?”

“Gross,” you said off instinct, shriveling up your nose. “You’re dead and that’s one of your worries?”

“At least it wasn’t my first worry,” he laughed.

“… I guess,” you grumbled, pulling at your clothes to cover more of you.

Both of you sat cross legged next to each other on the banks of the Aur, not worrying for your skirts getting dirty with the mud. A few people came down, a few bathing, and a few coming for better fertilizer. Some came for water, but none noticed you. Life seemed peaceful, almost maddeningly so, completely invisible. Too long, you thought, and one might wonder if they were real at all.

Much of life felt like that, so thank goodness you had Ahkmen beside you. Never one for long, quiet moments that lasted just a little too long, he ranted. About anything at all. Often it was about food, how he hated to lose that of all senses. Most of the time you laughed, just staring at him with a dopey smile on your face as he yelled at the air, his hands gesturing wild and in sharp movements. While people ran around you, caught up in their lives, you never once looked away from him. Everyone else blended together as your whole world came crashing down to a single point - him.

“-and it’s not like they have to follow that rule, right?” He asked, his hands gesturing to the people below.

The two of you sat upon the tallest statue you could find, easily climbable in your inexhaustible state. For the past hour and a half he’d been discussing incest and its’ relationship with royalty and commoners.

“Right,” you agreed easily.

“Commoners are gross most of the time -“

“Don’t be rude.”

“ - sorry - but, they can’t afford the niceties that we can, anyway. So if even they won’t do something, I don’t think we should.”

“I think you��re looking at it from a negative angle.”

“It’s a negative thing!”

“It might be that you think that only because you don’t get along with your brother and, he’s, well, your brother. What about cousins?” You asked, leaning your head on your hand.

“No! I have never, ever found my cousins attractive! I mean, thank the gods my parents aren’t related.”

“What would happen if they were?”

“… You’re teasing me, aren’t you?”

A smile broke off your face, cracking you up as you shook your head, sighing.

“Alright, you got me. I don’t really favor it either,” you finally agreed.

“You’re a little trickster,” he said, ruffling your hair.

“You’re a little boy.”

“I’m still older than you!”

Once a day you’d go back to the palace and check how things were going. Every now and then Ahkmen would follow close behind, hiding behind your back like he’d be seen. In those trips with him, you spent the majority of your time hiding how he died and his body from him. Stab wounds or not, dead versions of yourselves aren’t pleasant things to see.

You had learned a good deal - the tombs being built for his parents would be fitted to host him as well, a special chamber in between his mother and father. It all felt too morbid and too real, so you tried not to spend too much time listening to building plans. The only other thing to do was to see how preparations were coming with his body. Mostly making sure they were burying him with everything needed.

“I do not want to go into that hall of truths without that paper!”

“Wow, you’re rather insistent about this aren’t you? Any childhood fears I should know about?”

“I - I just, imagine getting eaten just because you forgot something. I’d get eaten every other day!”

“Ahkmen,” you said, squishing his cheeks together with your hands, pulling him closer to you. “They aren’t going to forget.”

He blushed, frowning and pushing you away.

“Probably,” he mumbled.

With your newfound inability to fall asleep many nights were spent stargazing. According to those living within Kemet, whenever a king died, they became a star. That wasn’t at all correct. You knew that, instilled with such a knowledge of the heavens and everything below that you had to fight yourself each time Ahkmen asked a question to not share too much.

You lay beside him in the great expanse of the desert, staring up into the vastness of the lights, lining the sky with a thick belt and shining so brightly it would’ve kept you up, could you need sleep.

“I never thought of it before,” he said, moving closer to you, “but do you think I’d become a star? I mean, I wasn’t really Pharaoh that long, was I… would it count?”

“Pharaohs don’t become stars. When someone good dies there is a god in the south who takes their body, their ashes, whatever is left of them, and turns them into a star. Thus they keep their soul in whatever way they see fit, and there is a star remembering them. This good person, they don’t need to be a king. In fact it’s often not kings. It’s just… good people. Like you.” You nudged him with your elbow, smiling gently.

“You know a lot about this stuff,” he commented.

“It’s the heavenly knowledge. That, and it’s interesting.”

“What else do you know?”

“A lot.”

“I mean about the stars.”

“Oh, that. Uh… you’re made of dead stars. We all are. When a star dies, which they only do once every fifty human lifetimes, their stuff goes everywhere. Then a very special person is born only in idea, and a god from the east takes the star stuff, takes that idea, and molds them. Then they write their story with the winds of the north and the water underground, and once all is written and prepared, they are put on earth to grow. If they are good, they become stars. If they are bad, they rot and fester in the earth till they fertilize the plants, which, are in turn, eaten by the animals of the plains.”

He looked at you with furrowed brow, his mouth parted slightly, looking thoroughly confused and mildly grossed out.

“Too much?”

“Yeah, bit too much - interesting, though. Didn’t have to phrase that last part like that.”

“Right, right. Sorry.”

He was quiet, before he asked, “what are you made of?”

“Mud mostly,” you said, looking up at the stars, your hands crossed behind your head as a makeshift cushion.

“What else?”

“Alabaster. Not conventional ingredients, I know.”

“Oh my - what happened to you?”

“What? What’s wrong?” You bolted upright, grabbing his hands, scanning his face frantically.

“No, you’re fine but, what do my parents think happened to you?!”

You hadn’t actually… thought of that.

“That’s a question for the morning,” you sighed, caught off guard but glad nothing was wrong. You leaned forward, resting your forehead on his shoulder.

He put his arm around you, allowing you to relax into him. He allowed you to listen to his breathing, to mourn at his lack of heartbeat, lack of pulse, and to adore his warmth.

“I think I like you more with your real hair,” he mumbled, his face pressed into the top of your head.

“It’s much shorter,” you said.

“It’s easier to pull, too,” he chuckled, tugging on it harshly, stopping when he noticed you didn’t budge. Actually, you nearly purred pressing yourself into him more.

“That feels nice,” you hummed.

“Did you just purr?” He asked at the same time.

“Well, I am partly cat.”

“Weird.”

“Rude,” you shot back, going weak when he put his hand in your hair again, petting you and making you warm all over.

“I love you,” he murmured in the silence, and in all the world you seemed to be the only ones alive. Secluded from everything you knew and everything you didn’t, only existing for the sake of each other. It seemed pure bliss, stretching for miles around you, his words echoing in that blissful quiet.

“I love you too,” you replied.

+

In the morning you kept your word, finding the answer to his question. What happened to your physical body? What did they think happened to you?

Turned out the answer was not as nice as you might’ve thought. You suspected that perhaps your physical body simply disappeared. Ahkmen didn’t express his own thoughts on the idea beforehand, so you had no idea what to say when looking through records and finding you died of all the bones in your body being crushed.

“… Wow.”

“Uh, yeah,” you said, blinking at the papyrus in front of you.

“At least it sounds badass.”

“You’re the worst.”

The rest of the day was spent attempting to cleanse yourself of the image of your body mangled and bloodied on the bedroom floor. You thought that perhaps you weren’t even bloody - maybe it was mud that spilled out. You also knew, right as you saw it, that it had been your brothers doing. Not on purpose, simply stopping you from saving your friend.

You kept up to date with the proceedings till you, alongside Ahkmen, watched as his sarcophagus was carried into the large tomb.

All around you quiet seemed to engulf the space. You stood close to him, your shoulders brushing as you watched with unblinking eyes as he was lowered away, locked into a chamber with riches surrounding him. Beside you, you heard him finally breathe once they sealed him in. When you turned to look, he was gone. You panicked, jumping and looking around you wildly for some sign of where he went.

With a blink of your eye you found yourself in a hall, expanding seemingly forever. Fantastically giant pillars lined the walls, humongous statues beside him, art carved intricately into the stone. Sitting at a large, semicircle table made of dark wood that you hadn’t ever seen before, you gripped at your surroundings. Looking to your left, Bastet sat beside you. To your right were more grand deities, ones you had never met before and that you were nearly terrified to be in close proximity to. In the middle of the whole table was Ma’at, keeper of the balance and truth. Near her sat Osiris, who was flanked by his sisters Isis and Nephthys. On the other side of Ma’at was Thoth and Anubis, the latter of who seemed the most solemn of all. His hands were folded neatly together, placed on the table, unnervingly even. Beside Anubis, looking small, was his daughter Qebhet.

All the gods, you noticed, had their heads on. Bastet had her cat head, Anubis with his long snout of a black jackal’s face.

It was silent.

Far too silent. They all stared ahead, into the vast blackness of the never-ending hall, their brows furrowed or looking perfectly at peace, undisturbed by the slow passing of time.

“What’s happening?” You finally asked your mother, nudging at her dress.

“Ahkmen is special, to you. That is why you are here,” she said in a quiet, serious voice. Turning to gesture at the others, she continued with, “they have allowed you to be here. Do not press that privilege. You are lucky you even get to know the fate of your friend.”

You nodded. By all technicalities, even Bastet wasn’t supposed to be there either. She wasn’t part of the judging process.

Anubis stood suddenly, followed by his daughter and Nephthys, all three of which walked down from the platform on which the rounded table stood, walking down the hallway. You gulped, your throat tight as you watched them walk down the hallway to receive Ahkmen’s soul.

Despite wanting to follow you sat patiently, in the everlasting quiet, your eyes closed as you waited for sound.

At last it came, the sound of footsteps, and from the darkness you saw the three forms of the gods joined by a fourth, one you knew to be Ahkmen. You tensed, your hands gripping at the wood, willing yourself not to jump up and greet him.

He kept his face down, the only sound still being the footsteps of the four, till he came to the middle of the room, and the gods joined you at the table. Clutched in his hand was the papyrus he’d been so worried about them forgetting, and when Ma’at cleared her throat, he looked up. She looked at the paper, and with quick, shaking hands he opened it, and began reciting his negative confessions.

“I have not committed sins against me,” he said, his voice firm but anxious, long breaths keeping himself under control. He hadn’t yet truly looked upon the table of judges before him, and had thus not seen you. “I have not wrought evil.”

You closed your eyes, hoping beyond hope that he would be alright. That he wouldn’t slip up, that he would weigh righteous against her feather.

“I have not inflicted pain.”

Please, please, please.

“I… have not masturbated in the sanctuaries of the god of my city.”

You bit your tongue, taking a deep breath. You would not laugh. It’d be inappropriate and immature, you tried to tell yourself.

“I have not carried away the milk from the mouths of children.”

Please, please, please.

“I have not stopped water when it should flow.”

Please, please, please.

“I have not extinguished a fire when it should burn.”

Please, please, please.

“I have not turned back the god at his appearances.”

At long last he looked up from his paper, his eyes immediately going to you, widening upon recognition. His mouth hung open and you nodded, looking at his paper to cue him into the fact that he wasn’t done. With another deep breath, he continued.

“I am pure. I am pure. I am pure. My pure offerings are the pure offerings of that great Benu which dwelleth in Hensu. For behold, I am the nose of Neb-nefu, who giveth sustenance unto all mankind, on the day of the filling of the Utchat in Anu, in the second month of the season Pert, on the last of the month. I have seen the filling of the Utchat in Anu, therefore let not calamity befall me in this land, or in this Hall of Maati, because I know the names of the gods who are therein.”

Ma’at turned to Osiris with unnerving steadiness, nodding in one, slow motion. He stood, his hands on the table to balance him before he came to stand in front of Ahkmen. From seemingly thin air, Osiris pulled his heart out, and with wide, shocked eyes Ahkmen watched as it was placed upon the golden scale in front of Ma’at. You watched in anticipation as Ma’at plucked a feather from her crown, small and white, placing it on the other side of the scale.

The weight jumped a little, but came steady. The two were equal.

You heard Ahkmen let out a breath, breathing steady for the first time since his body had been buried. With a quick glance to your mother, silently asking permission, she nodded, and you jumped from your position, running towards him. Your arms outstretched, you engulfed him in the tightest hug yet, feeling him bury his head into your shoulder, holding you back just as tight.

“I was so worried,” he said, not moving from his position. You didn’t either, keeping him close to you.

“I knew you’d be alright,” you said, brushing his hair with your hand.

Distantly you heard footsteps approaching. Upon finally breaking away from him you saw Anubis standing over the two of you, his eyes steady as they looked between you.

“Ahkmenrah. You have been allowed an easy trial due to Mahjur’s testimony,” Anubis spoke, his voice surprisingly smooth and easy to listen to. You hadn’t given any testimony, you remembered in an instant, but you said nothing. “I will guide you to Lily Lake. There you will meet Hraf-hef.”

“Yes, uh, thank you,” Ahkmen stuttered, bowing slightly in his gratitude. He grabbed your hand, pulling you along as Anubis departed. Without thought you followed, eager to spend just one more moment with him.

Then from behind a voice boomed, echoing through the empty chambers with a lilt that nearly crippled you to your knees.

“My child can not go with you,” Bastet said, but it wasn’t quite her. Like many of the judges, she was partial to having two natures - one for every day (that was usually kind and docile), and one for battle.

“What?” Ahkmen asked, looking confused. It was the first time he seemed to feel confident in his words since he’d entered the hall.

“If Mahjur goes with you,” Bastet turned to look at you, “you will not return. And no one may visit you without getting trapped themselves. It is not a fate you wish to have.”

Eternity with him, locked away in a second world. The past week or so had been just fine, speaking only with him, but it was bound to drive you mad. As much as you loved him, one needed more than just one person they spoke to. Even if those other people weren’t really friends, it was necessary.

“Mahjur,” Ahkmen murmured, soft and pleading as he tugged gently at your hand.

Eternity without him, barred from ever seeing him again. You hadn’t ever lived without him truly. How would you fare? Would you grow away from him, or burn yourself into nothingness in his absence?

“I -“

You tried to speak, stopped when you noticed the weight of his hand in yours began to dissipate. Turning to him you found his form half gone, see through as it had been on earth. You rushed to him, trying to grab him, hold him in place, but he was gone before you could take another step closer, leaving naught but the space between you and Anubis.

Around you you heard the horrified gasps of the gods, but it did little when you were met with stunning silence once more. Consumed in darkness you tried to see, reaching with shaking, scared hands for any sign that you were still alive. Eventually your eyes adjusted to the dingy light, finding there to be no light at all. You were sealed into the ground, surrounded by the many gifts given to Ahkmenrah.

You were sealed in his grace, and a sudden feeling of understandable dread came over you when you heard screaming. Turning around slow and terrified, you saw the lid of his sarcophagus jumping up and down each time it was pounded against, the screaming occupying it in its’ confused terror.

In sudden realization you jumped into action, unlocking the coffin, pushing the lid off, and helping him sit up. Still encased in wrappings you kept your eyes wide, wondering how awful he was going to look.

With careful hands you reached up behind his head, unwrapping him. It came off slowly, and when you were at last done, you were surprised.

He looked perfectly fine. Healthier than healthy, actually, fighting fit and beautiful as the night he was anointed.

“Mahjur,” he said, his voice shaking and his eyes impossibly wide. “This has been a very intense day.”

“I know, darling.”

“I really want to go to sleep,” he said.

“I know. Come here,” you comforted softly, helping him out of his grave and onto the bed they had so helpfully supplied for the afterlife.

“What’s happening to me?” He asked, his voice cracking as he put his head in his hands, rubbing his eyes tiredly.

“I don’t -“

“This is all that Khonsu’s fault! If he wasn’t so damned sentimental, he’d, he’d… this would never had happened!” Bastet said, appearing before she even seemed to be speaking, pacing in front of you. Your eyes widened as you watched her, pulling at her ears with human hands.

“What do you mean?” You asked, trying not to aggravate her further.

“Oh - uh, just a moment,” she said, turning to the room, her eyes scanning over it. “It’s bound to be somewhere around here.”

As you watched her, you rubbed Ahkmen’s shoulders, helping him try to relax. He was still tense as ever, rubbing his temples as he tried to digest the many things that had happened to him within a very short timespan.

“Here it is,” she said at last, pulling a golden tablet off the wall that seemed to glow with its own ethereal light. She handed it to you, and immediately you recognized the design to be your own. It had to be what Merenkahre was making for his son.

“I know this, I designed it. I don’t know what it does though,” you said, handing it back to her. Ahkmen looked up, watching with the same confusion as you.

“It brings to life that which is dead. Whether that be statues or carvings, or… you,” she said, turning to Ahkmen, who looked like he did not appreciate an old god looking at him.

“Shouldn’t everything in this room be coming to life then?” You asked.

“Look around, child of mine, and see.”

“I can’t, it’s too dark.”

Bastet sighed, a tired, weary sigh.

“Right. Night vision, you don’t have that because you don’t have the cat - okay, here,” she grumbled, lighting a torch with the materials she could find.

Eyes surrounded you. Stock still, following you in their statue forms that could not move. Mummified cats moved beneath their dressings, wriggling like they were full of worms. Paintings whispered about you, seeing for the first time your face.

“Yikes.”

“We’re pulling Khonsu into court in the morning, and you,” she pointed to Ahkmen, “will be there. We will find how this magic works. For now… do whatever you children do.” She left.

You sat, your mouth parted slightly, the torch on the floor illuminating the hundreds of eyes. Ahkmen moaned miserably, putting his head in his hands again, leaning against you as you began rubbing his back again.

“Have you ever met Khonsu?” He asked after a while of you just sitting next to him.

“No. I have heard varying accounts on what he is like.”

“How foolish of my father to do this. What’d he think would happen? That I could free myself of my wrappings, open up an entire sarcophagus from the inside, and open up the giant door holding my own tomb closed?” He groaned, his voice cracking as he said tomb.

“Love blinds the lesser and the nobler to dangers and common sense. Grief can do the same,” you said quietly.

He was silent for another moment before he spoke.

“Mahjur,” he said, “how long have you known me?”

You pulled your hands away from him.

“All my life. I met you when I was four -“

“Four months. Yes. Why… why have you stayed beside me?”

“Where is this coming from?”

“Just answer,” he said, finally meeting your eye as he finished, “please?”

“… You’re everything I’ve ever wanted to stand for. I’m young and I don’t make good decisions which is probably why we ended up with so many reprimands, but my one truly good decision was being with you.”

“In what sense?”

“Hm?”

“You’re with me, in what sense?”

“I - I don’t… understand,” you said slowly, trying to think his words through in a way you might get.

“Never mind,” he mumbled, put off.

“Ahk,” you whined, pulling at his arm. “Tell me.”

“It’s nothing!”

“It’s obviously not!”

“I’m still in love with you!” He practically shouted, untangled from his position before tangling himself right back into it, pulling his knees into his chest and hiding his face.

What could you say to that?

“Now isn’t the time, dearest.”

Nice going, that’s sure to make him feel better, you chastised yourself.

“I know,” was all he muttered, keeping his face away from yours. You hurt him, you knew that, and though you weren’t aware of it until that point, you’d been hurting him for a while. It hadn’t ever occurred to you that he still had those sorts of feelings - you thought you were alone in your affections. However, in all reality, it really wasn’t the time. He was half dead and half alive and had just met the more terrifying set of gods, all of which can be a traumatic experience.

You put your arm around his shoulders, letting him fall against your side. He whimpered something you couldn’t fully hear, burying his head in your clothing.

“Things are… difficult, right now,” you said, keeping your voice quiet and low. “But I will always be by your side. I will fight each god if I need to.”

“Sounds dangerous,” he mumbled.

“It’s only common sense if it’s you.”

+

By the time daytime came once more, you’d helped him back into his wrappings, lying him down in his coffin.

“Don’t close it till I’m… you know,” he requested, and you complied, waiting till his cheeks hollowed and his breathing stilled before shutting the lid. You then closed your eyes, following the trail of his spirit back to the court full of judges. The long hall before you was lit by torchlight, the flames flickering as you watched.

Ma’at leaned forward, looking down on Ahkmen with a critical stare.

“What do you propose we do with you?” She asked, leaving your friend to speak.

“I - take away the uh, spell. Then I don’t come to, uh, life, anymore,” he suggested, keeping his head high.

“We cannot do that. It interferes too greatly with the fate of things.”

“But me being there and influencing every one of his decisions doesn’t?” You asked, standing up. Before you could even blink you were standing next to him, placed there by Osiris himself.

“Do you wish to be tried as well?” He asked, his eye wide with questioning near indistinguishable from anger.

“Yes,” you said firmly, standing your ground. Behind you Ahkmen tugged at your hand, trying to calm your anger. You grabbed his hand, intertwining your fingers and squeezing in affirmation that this was what you needed to do.

Osiris sniffed, clearly taken aback by your boldness, if not impressed. “Very well,” he said.

In the far corner, Bastet glared at you.

“There can be only one option,” Ma’at spoke once Osiris had taken his seat once more. All turned to her, waiting expectantly for her verdict. “Ahkmenrah will die each morning, and he will stay here and be judged. Hopefully you complete your sayings in time to be allowed into Aaru for a time before you will once more be submitted to life on earth.”

She spoke with such a cool formality, as though she didn’t believe Ahkmen was truly a living thing. Like she was above him in every way. Your fists clenched at her, in all her wisdom and age she was insolent.

“That is unfair and cruel and you know it,” you hissed, practically seething.

“It is the only option. You are young, you cannot know -“

“Yes, I am young, but I obviously know more than you!” You bit back, interrupting her. Right below the surface, beneath that confident, angry exterior you knew this was wrong. You knew how childish you were being but damn you if you were going to let him suffer like this for all of eternity. “It’s in your hands and you know this is the wrong thing to do!”

“Unless you have another option,” she spoke with a thousand fires behind her, backing up every word she used, “this is my final word.”

“Give me time. I will come up with something that will suit both parties,” you insisted, feeling Ahkmen tug at your hand but paying it no notice.

“Until we convene once more tomorrow, we have other souls to judge.” With a flick of your wrist, you were gone. Sent away into some other space, a vast whiteness that spread for eons.

“I can’t believe you did that!” Ahkmen finally said, gasping as he spoke, clutching his hair in tight fists.

“What?”

“You - you argued! With Ma’at, who’s the fucking God of logic and justice, oh my gods!” He said, his eyes wide as he turned to you. He grabbed your shawl in a fist, pulling you towards him in a harsh manner. You couldn’t quite tell if he was excited or angry, the way all his muscles tensed and his mouth hung open.

“I said I’d do anything for you. I wasn’t lying,” you replied, coming closer to him with small steps.

“I know, I know, but… I just… again, I suppose it’s a lot. Very much a lot.”

“You could say that,” you laughed.

“So what’s your plan?” He asked, releasing you.

“My what?”

“To get me out of eternal purgatory,” he said, his brow furrowed and speaking in a suddenly soft voice.

“I’ve got to think. Apparently we can’t stop you from dying every morning and coming back to life every night, so we’ll have to deal with that. Maybe every time you became, uh, this again,” you gestured vaguely to his spirit form which, if you saw in the street, you wouldn’t think anything of, “you could just come here, instead of facing trial.”

“So I’d spend half my time in a dingy cave filled with meaningless treasure and the rest of my time in a white desert.”

“Mm… doesn’t sound as good out loud,” you muttered, beginning to pace.

Together, you brainstormed, coming up with various, shoddy solutions to your dilemma. Every now and then one of you would get up and pace, eventually brought down by the other to the sitting position on the floor once more. This routine continued, till as you were rubbing your eyes tiredly, a thought came to you.

“Ahk,” you started with.

“Yes?”

“What am I the god of again?”

“The forgotten and abandoned. That, and, uh.. what was it… childhood love or something?”

“Exactly! The first part, exactly, I’m the god of the forgotten! I - I need to go for a moment,” you said, stuttering through your words as you went over your idea in your mind, churning it at record speed.

“Wait, don’t leave me!” He cried, grasping your wrist and igniting an old pain from an injury he’d given you long ago. You hissed and he relented, backing off quickly.

“I need to. I’ll be back in less than an hour,” you comforted him, holding his face in your hands. He sighed softly, leaning his head into your hold. “I’ll always come back for you.”

“Do what you have to,” he said finally, his hand lingering on yours as he pulled away. “I will be counting though.”

“I’m counting on it. Get it?”

“Ha, ha,” he said, rolling his eyes, but a genuine snort did come out. You grinned, leaving with a snap of your fingers.

Memphis seemed not to have changed too much. Statues of gods still lined temples and the palace, each and every animal being worshipped in some way due to their connection with a god. Keeping yourself invisible you entered the palace you once considered your home, crawling your way through shadows till you found the throne room. Atop the largest seat was Kahmuh, who seemed to be relaxing away his time. The servants in the room referred to him as Kahmunrah, a name which disgusted you, making you shrivel up your nose.

As you assumed, Ahkmen’s brother had risen to power. That left the other question you had; did he erase Ahkmen’s statues?

Racing around the palace and the streets of the city, it seemed so. Every reference of him was destroyed, the faces of once grand effigies tarnished by the hands of slaves ordered by Kahmuh.

“By all accounts,” you said, addressing the court at large, Ahkmen tucked safely behind him, not one for facing the stares of gods. “Ahkmen is a forgotten man.” The following words you did not wish to say in front of him, but it was necessary for the court to hear, and he needed to be there at all times during its’ proceedings. “History will not remember him, and if I do recall, I am the deity of the abandoned. I protect them. He has been abandoned by his family, and his city, his people, and they have all forgotten him.”

Ma’at looked unamused, but she always looked like that, so you were beginning to think that was just her face. She cleared her throat, looking down at the paper before her.

“You’re a new god,” she said, looking up for your confirmation which you quickly gave. “What do you do with these forgotten things you pick up?”

You stopped yourself from insulting her. Desperately you wanted to be able to respect her, but when she kept degrading Ahkmen, it was difficult.

“I protect them. They find solace in me, or whatever else they need, and I guide them.”

She nodded, closing her eyes in contemplation. You waited, watching each little micro movement of her face. The way she pressed her lips together, the small moment when her eyes closed tighter. You kept waiting, waiting for her word, but she said nothing.

“I would stay by his side when he is alive, and he will stay with me when he dies. I will make sure we do not cause any trouble,” you added when the silence became unbearable.

“You had a habit for causing trouble when you were living as a child,” Thoth noted in a quiet voice.

“It was a time of no great consequence. Please, I beg of you. Life isn’t fair but you can make it so, at least for just this one time,” you asked of them, watching in careful anticipation as they looked at each other, communicating in small looks and quirks. At last she turned to you, her face hiding emotions you could not fathom.

“Have your way,” she sniffed, “and care for this child. But if he is ever discovered, if he ever be remembered, leave him. At that point he will no longer be in your domain, and you must forget him.”

“Of course,” you immediately agreed, not thinking of any consequence. Leaving him when he is known would be better than leaving him when he would be sorely, terribly alone.

You held his hand tight, and with her dismissal you left, keeping him close to you. Your descent back down to the surface of earth was slow, and from your position you could watch tiny people flit about in their tiny lives, thinking their world so much larger than the others around them.

“Are you sure you made the right decision?” He asked, pulling himself closer to you.

“I don’t know. All I know is that you won’t be alone anymore,” you said, speaking softly, not meeting his eye.

“What if I am found?”

“Then you will make new friends.”

“None like you,” he murmured, holding your chin and forcing you to look at him. You sighed, casting your gaze downwards. You’d be utterly alone if he was found.

“No. None like you.”

+

By day you wandered the earth. Staying mostly in Kemet the scenery soon got boring, but it was better than the night. By night you spoke about anything, and soon everything began to run out. It seemed everything experienceable had already been done by you, and in his state, the numerous ways to live were limited. No new foods, no need to sleep. Days and nights grew long, everything meshing together till the only distinct in a hazy grey world was him.

It was the fate you had chosen for yourself. No more stars. No more drink or food, no pleasure such as the sun shining on full skin. It wasn’t long till Ahkmen forgot to count the days, too busy counting seconds, far too concentrated on looking over the carvings of his tomb for the five hundred and sixty fifth time. You kept time though, vigilantly. It was a way to occupy the passing time.

When you suggested leaving Kemet to explore the rest of the daunting world, six hundred years had passed. Six hundred years of feeling half the life of water around your ankles, six hundred years missing the taste of honey, six hundred years remembering what once was. Six hundred years loving him and never telling him.

“Where would we go?” He asked, and despite the years behind him, he still held the excitement of a child. You smiled wide, grabbing his hands in the dim of the cavern.

“I don’t know,” you said excitedly. He grinned, toothy and wide, just as enlivened as you had become.

That morning you helped him back to sleep, kissing his forehead, watching as he turned back into the rubble he had become. Then, pulling yourself out of your own body you helped him, reaching into the gulfs of his tomb and pulling his soul far away from the dank room.

“Which direction?” He asked.

“Wherever the wind may lead.”

With a strong gust of wind you headed northeast, and with all the speed you could muster, you were halfway across the world by midday. Surrounding you were mountains covered in snow, something you scarcely saw. In such large amounts it astounded both of you, shivering despite your half alive states.

“So, where do you suppose we are?”

“Asia?” You guessed.

“What’s Asia?”

“It’s uh, a place,” you stammered, unsure of how to define a continent.

“That’s so terribly helpful, thank you so much,” he sassed, crossings his arms in an attempt to keep warm.

“There should be a fire that way,” you said, pulling your shawl tighter over yourself and pointing down the slope.

“How can you tell?”

“I can smell it.”

“Stupid cat senses,” he muttered, trudging down through the deep snow.

You happened upon a group who called themselves Huns. They could not see you but you still sat with them, enjoying the warmth of their fire and rather joyous laughter. You couldn’t partake in earthly pleasure, but you could certainly appreciate the sound of laughter, and the obvious telling of stories, though you couldn’t understand the language.

“Mahjur,” he spoke softly, pulling you to the side with the biggest, clearest smile you’d seen on him in centuries. “Let’s come back here tomorrow.”

You agreed easily.

When one spends enough time listening to a language, one picks it up. After fifty years that’s what happened to your dear friend, as well as you. The stories they’d been telling you found were not especially innocent stories, but some were entertaining to hear. Ahkmen soon realized both of you were fluent in the language, and thus started a new expedition in his life.

“I want to learn as many languages as possible!” He said to you, and his vigor and excitement melted you, and you so easily agreed.

In your adventures you took him to so many places, interacting with nothing but seeing everything, like absent observers. If strong enough you could enjoy scents, leaning in too close to a pie who’s scent drifted from the open kitchen window, pressing roses too close to your noses to enjoy what it had to offer. You waded through massive oceans, finding warm and cold ones alike that, to both your surprise, ended up actually being the same ocean. The earth was one, big, massive ocean that had some land swelled up in it. Every evening without fail, before the stars could shine, before you could finally see their light again, he disappeared, and you rushed back to his tomb.

You always helped him out of his wrappings, and every night you’d talk about your experiences.

“These Roman people, they have fantastic food,” he said, focusing intensely on the memory of focaccia.

“You haven’t even tried it yet,” you giggled, staring mindlessly at him, caught up in your own admiration of him.

“I know, but you can practically taste it on the smell! And,” he looked at you, raising his eyebrows and pointing a finger at you, “I quite like the language.”

“It’s rather nice to hear, isn’t it?” You mused.

“It’s elegant! I can’t wait till I understand more of it!”

Two thousand years since his death and you returned to Asia, hoping to refresh some of your Hun, finding them speaking an entirely different language. Ahkmen looked distraught upon the town as they spoke the vastly different dialect. You shrugged, turning to him.

“Best thing is you’ll get to learn this one as well.”

He gave a small, sad smile, but agreed, sitting on a bench with you. Together you watched as families passed by, small children and men, women and merchants, speaking a language that sounded like garbled noises but rolled off their tongue so smoothly.

“I’m starting to recognize some similarities,” he said to you on your tenth day of observation.

“Well, it is the same continent.”

“Fair point.”

With the similarities it wasn’t long till he picked it up, speaking near fluently with you.

“Have you ever wondered if we’re actually getting it all wrong? That a thing we’re saying isn’t what we think we’re saying?”

“That was a confusing sentence to hear, but yes. However I think we’re getting it right for the most part,” you said.

Even in all your conversations, endless silences and endless talks he never once brought up what had bothered him so many centuries ago.

“I’m still in love with you!”

“Now isn’t the time, dearest.”

When was the right time?

You finally found out. Years of maturity helped you grow with him, and eventually you found your answer. No time was going to be right till you made it so.

As always, the cave was enveloped in darkness, not a single stream of light getting through the walls. He rested his head on your shoulder, dozing as you both leaned back, sitting on the floor.

“Ahk,” you murmured, your cheek pressed into the top of his head.

“Mm?” He hummed softly, half asleep.

“Do you remember what you said to me,” you took a sharp breath, “when we were being tried?” Anxiety seemed to replace every blood cell in your body, overcrowding your breath and halting your thoughts.

“I said a lot of things I’m sure.”

“You know,” you said, choking up for no particular reason, “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“Mahj?” He looked up at you, pulling himself away to look at you better.

“What I said must have hurt you terribly. I never meant to do that. I - I was just… nervous, I guess.”

“This… this is about, how I said that I still loved you?”

“… Yeah,” you mumbled, hiding your face in your pulled up knees.

He scooted closer to you, putting an arm around your shoulders and pulling you so you could rest your head on his shoulder. You calmed yourself listening to his breath, feeling the slow up and down against your body.

“I don’t mind so much anymore. That doesn’t mean I’ll ever stop loving you like that, but. I understand that you aren’t - you don’t think of me like that.”

“Don’t think of you like that? Are you insane? Ahk,” you tugged yourself away from his grasp, looking him in the face. “I loved you more than anything. I still do. My dearheart,” you held his face in your hands, watching as it grew red and teary, “I was scared. I’m not anymore. Not with you. Never with you.”

He let out a laugh, looking down in embarrassment as he grew more red in the face. Looking up he beamed at you, leaning in for a kiss sweeter than any shared before. No more words were shared that night, the only thing to be needed was one another.

Two thousand more years.

Four thousand since his death.

Four thousand years spent together, when one afternoon spent exploring whatever the hell a cars was, he suddenly shot up. You looked up from the black wheels with a concerned look, asking him what was wrong.

“Something’s terribly wrong,” he said, frowning and looking back at you. In an instant that confusion switched to fear, his eyes widening, mouth parting and hand reaching for you as he tried to yell, silenced by his own disappearance. You bolted upright, running towards where he was standing, grasping at empty air, hands shaking from shock.

“His tomb has been opened,” came a cool, familiar voice from behind you. You whipped back around, finding Ma’at in a suit, fiddling with the cuffs, bearing a human head upon her shoulders.

“Is he safe?” You asked, first and foremost, walking to stand in front of her, desperate for an answer.

“Yes,” she answered simply, looking at you as a lesser being, looking as though she was almost sorry.

You fell to the ground, sitting cross legged as you contemplated your own life. You had submitted yourself to this. She sat down beside you, putting a hand on your shoulder.

“Visit him if you’d like, but do not show yourself. I will not punish you for that.”

Looking back up at her you found no deception, only a sadness that hit her too close to home.

“Thank you,” you murmured instead of crying, realizing that she was experiencing her own empathy. She nodded, patting your shoulder, and with that she disappeared.

You followed him, close behind, making sure he was safe, never interfering. Cambridge was his first stop, where the both of you, in separate lives, learned english.

Watch.

Watch.

Observe.

Please don’t hurt yourself.

From afar you watched him converse with the other exhibits that came to life from his tablet. From afar you watched him laugh, and from even further you watched him weep.

“I miss you,” he would say to himself when no one was around. He’d gotten a bad habit of talking to himself, but you knew the words were meant for you. They had to be.

“I know you’re listening. You… you wouldn’t give up on me that easily,” he’d say. “Would you?”

Never.

You watched from afar as he was transferred across the ocean, to a new land you never got the chance to see. The whole place was overrun with people, flooding out of the woodwork, flitting about in daily lives that they’d come to regret too soon.

You watched as he was locked in his sarcophagus.

Night after night.

Screaming himself hoarse, pounding so hard on the lid it’d rattle like windows in a harsh storm.

It became so difficult to watch year after year, but you stayed. Just in case. Maybe he could sense you were there. Probably not, but you would never leave him.

A change of the night guard and a healthy dose of thievery and fear led him to finally taking real, fresh air again. You gasped in your own relief, watching as he ran down the hallways, golden cape trailing behind him as he helped the strange man with the debacle he’d gotten himself into.

Sometimes he’d spend the night dancing, laughing and listening to the many stories each exhibit had. You smiled to yourself as you watched him live, glad his existence amounted to so much more than you could give him.

“I, uh,” he said, sitting down with a man who called himself Theodore, “I had this friend, once.”

Your heart skipped a beat, your breath halting in anticipation.

“Friend is a bit of an understatement,” he said, chuckling. “They were… I guess what you would call a soulmate. They gave up a lot for me.”

“Sounds like a good friend,” Theodore said.

“More than that.”

He explained how you were a god, and though it seemed the man didn’t quite believe him, he nodded, acting like he did.

“Mahjur, that was - that was their name.”

“Mahjur? I know that name. There’s a few stories concerning that god.”

You frowned. You hadn’t heard of these stories.

“Really?” Ahk asked, scooting closer. “Tell me one.”

“It’s long, so I’ll sum it up - the lesson is to be kind to everyone, as you never know if one could be a higher man! Such as your friend. In this, uh, story, Mahjur gave up everything to help this abandoned boy simply because the boy had been nice to them once.”

Ahkmen was quiet, absorbing the words, thinking of when you could’ve done that.

“They saved me. It’s foolish, but I think they’re still listening. I don’t think Mahj would give up on me. It’s probably just a fools hope though.”

“Never doubt hope, boy. That’s a foolish thing to do.”

Wise words, you thought to yourself, but you kept your eyes trained on Ahkmen.

“Perhaps you’re right. They would’ve done anything for me, least I can do is believe in them.”

Theodore pat his shoulder twice, leaving with a tip of his hat. Ahkmen watched as he rode off on his horse, resting his head in his hands once he was out of sight.

“I was right, Mahjur,” he said, and you perked up. His eyes watered as he gazed up at the ceiling, never spotting you from your hidden position. “I knew I'd miss you. I knew this decision of yours was a mistake.” His voice cracked and he wiped his eyes, sighing and leaning back against the wall. With a deep sigh he closed his eyes.

That evening, you paid little heed to Ma'at's warnings from so long ago. You snuck in and, atop his casket, you placed your gold necklace, and left before you could be seen. However, no matter what you told yourself, you couldn't stay to watch.

You couldn't come back.

[trashcatsnark]

What’s your opinion on Kerry being available to only male V when it’s mentioned in-game that he’s bi (correct me if I’m wrong, I have terrible memory)?? I feel like they should’ve had bi romance options if they were able to implement both gay and straight ones.

Oh anon, oooooh anon. I love you dearly, but you intentionally or not might as well have thrown lit dynamite in my ask box. This discourse has been such a strange beast within this fandom and I have definitely shared some vague thoughts about it before. I’m putting everything under a read more, to help stave off some....harassment or putting it in people’s lives who may not want it. 

 I still remember I was frankly heartbroken and upset when I first learned Kery wasn’t romanceable by female V when the game first officially came out, but before I played it; River and Panam weren’t even really known about, cause they weren’t talked about much in the promo material,  plus Kerry was shown in romance scenes with what looked to be female V. So, if you go back far enough you’ll find me in December cope posting and being the saddest and angriest of beans, because other than Johnny who I knew was likely off the table. He was one of the only characters I wanted to potentially romance. Now, I’m further away from it, have  processed my feelings regarding it and am more rational I believe regarding the issue. 

But, that being said, a large issue of this sort of discourse is that; no matter what anyone says, someone somwhere is upset. I’ve been insulted, blocked, accused of fetishizing gay men, and so much over my opinion regarding this matter. I’m still currently debating if I even wanna tag this, cause the issue almost always brings negativity to my blog and to me. I have very little interest in being berated for this, so we’ll see how I feel after I finish typing this all out. I’m going to try to go through all my issues, my points, my troubles and feelings about the matter. But, at the end of the day, it is merely my opinion. If someone disagrees, fine, just don’t attack people or berate them over pixels in a video game. Just dont. That’s all I ask. Okay, so I’m gonna divide this into talking points and whatever, now. 

Firstly, Kerry is bisexual. Point blank, period. I’ve seen folks try to argue that his wife was like comphet, which if you dont know means that sometimes exclusively homosexual people will try to force themselves into heterosexual relationships because society has conditioned them to believe they have to be straight. While, I’m not negating the fact that this happens, as a bisexual/pansexual (I use the terms interchangeably to define my experience and feelings)  person I’ve struggled with it when making sense of my attraction to women. It genuinely is something that happens. This is not the case for Kerry; he doesn’t ever hide his attraction to men, between TTRPG lore and the video game he has had two wives , and he is stated by game developers and TTRPG creator to be bisexual.He is bisexual. Getting that out there, saying other wise, in my opinion is a level of bi erasure. That being said, I do still have my grievances with how the game chose to handle his bisexuality and bisexuality as whole, also imo, the game generally doesn’t seem...to treat players who are attracted to men well… 

But before I get into that, I wanna make clear, I feel like Cyberpunk 2077 should have had more romance options for every orientation. If you’re not going to create a player-sexual style of romance; ie where every romanceable character is attracted to the player regardless and wish to focus on each character having their own predetermined sexuality; only have one character for each sexuality is kind of bullshit. If you’re a lesbian player and you’re not into Judy, you get nothing, except a fuck around with Meredith (who I will get to later). You’re a straight woman, but not into River, shit out of luck. You’re a gay man who’s not into Kerry, sucks to suck bud. You’re a straight man who’s not into Panam (kind dont get how you wouldn’t be but who am i to judge), well, you can fuck Meredith… so woooo. Oh also, if you’re not attracted to women, you will still be forced to watch in first person pov a sex scene with Alt and if you want Johnny to like you, you gotta date a girl. Also, all the male love interests will be sidelined mostly…. Hooray… But I digress, either go in with all romance options bi/pan/player sexual, or give more options for romance. Cause now you have the issue of people not getting the partner they hoped for and not liking their only option. Now, you got people trying to make the Judy  bi, which is lesbian erasure and lesbophobic, along with people saying Kerry isn’t bi and can’t be with women which is bi erasure and biphobic. Whereas, if you had just gone in from the get go with either more options or a player-sexual romance system; we wouldn’t be here, CDPR. 

Okay, so next thing, now that I’ve addressed my issues with the entire romance system and that yes, Kerry is bi. Should Kerry have been able to be romanced as female V? Yes and no. Which sounds vague, but I’m going somewhere. With the current set up of it; Kerry being romanceable to a female V would have unfairly given female players an additional love interest over male players. Female V would have the option of Judy, River, or Kerry. And Male V’s would have the option of Kerry or Panam. That’s not fair. I get that, inherently. CDPR painted themselves into a corner, by only letting there be two romances for “each” gender, one for “each” sexuality, and then using a canonically bi character for one of them. They played themselves, they were either gonna have to give an unfair amount of love interest to one side of their gender system or make a bi character who will only pursue one gender. So, they went for the latter. 

Now, some people feel thats fine, because Kerry having a gender preference is fine and its okay for bi people to lean a certain way in regards to gender and its okay for them to not be attracted to people. And that is true. I am a bisexual woman who leans a little more towards men, I get that. However, I have only been given one reason for Kerry’s preference for male V over female V. And it was by a developer of the game who stated that Kerry pursues Male V and not Female V because Male V reminds him more of Johnny… And I hate that. I personally, hate it so deeply, because to me it does a complete disservice to Kerry and V’s relationship and Kerry’s arc. Because even with female V you see him being preoccupied with Johnny and V’s connection to Johnny, then you see him move past that. So, to then state, its still a deciding factor in him romancing V is so wrong to me. Like why???? Why would you do that to people who like Kerry??? Why would you put that in their heads, that Kerry on some level, subconsciously or not, was thinking about Johnny when he decides to romance V. Cause that’s not in the game, in the game you get the vibe he’s moving on past Johnny, like he’s growing, developing, genuinely likes V. But that stupid tweet, just radiates rancid vibes, whyyy???  

And then, outside of that nasty tweet, I have to ask what other reason is there for why he prefers male V over fem V.  They’re...the same characters essentially, just with different pronouns and body type. They also can look like whatever you want; they’re completely customizable. So, Its based off of what the game associates with  gender characteristics and nothing else, meaning, his attraction is rooted solely in their gender and he turns down fem V by virtue of them being a woman and nothing else. Which, yeah, bisexual/pansexual people have preferences but when that preference completely excludes a gender based on nothing but gender…. Uhh????? See my issue???? 

And I’ve seen people saying, well, its better than CDPR playing into slutty will date anybody bisexual stereotypes. But, the thing is...THEY STILL DO THAT which is what drives me up the god damn wall; they managed to do slutty bi stereotypes and I don’t even get kiss the boy, which again, I get the need for fairness but wow, just wow. And lemme explain. 

Meredith is the only character, other than joytoys, whom you can have sex with regardless of gender, body type, etc. She is the only character who shows that she is attracted to V on some level regardless of gender. 

She is a one night stand. Her sex animations are the same as joytoys. She treated like a promiscuous love phobic woman.  And having characters like that is fine, my own V is promiscuous and love phobic. But, we can acknowledge that in a video game by a AAA game company having the only character who is at least physically attracted to the player no matter what, be nothing but sex fodder...isn’t great bi representation, right? 

Oh, and Kerry himself still is a promiscuous bisexual man, he just won’t romance female V because apparently, according to a dev, they don’t remind him of Johnny enough. AND THATS THE DEVS WORDS, NOT MINE, I HATE THAT. Like, Kerry is shown to have people’s lingerie around his house. He’s stated by Johnny to be someone who fucks around. He gets a blowjob from a man in a stairwell. 

The two most blatantly canonically bi character in this game are promiscuous; one wont romance V at all and just wants sex, the other will only romance a male V because at worse, he’s comparing them mentally subconsciously to his dead friend and at best….because….reasons…. Literally, from what I understand for Kerry to romance V, they have to have the “male” body type and “male” voice. Meaning, fem V could literally by all appearances look like masc V, body type wise, but because she uses female pronouns and has a feminine sounding voice...no… the stars say no… 

In my honest opinion, it is bad bisexual representation and a not so well thought out romance system for a game. 

But, that being said, I literally never romance anyone, because I’m a Johnny simp. So, the fuck do I know.

oh god do i tag this.... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[sleeplessandstubborn]

Emily in Paris or why I stopped caring for the main character and started rooting for the French. Episode 2.

I must confess one thing. I have a sort of admiration for people who have the habit and the will of go running before work, because I don’t do these things, and people who can do it while wearing what seems like a lace top (?) maybe more adequate for other things, but who am I to judge if Emily looks perfectly fine when running while I look like a bag with sport wear. So congratulations Miss Cooper you are doing well in this aspect. Also shows that Emily is adapting her schedules and her habits to her new life. Example: she’s not going to arrive early to work this time. Lesson learnt, so good for her!

Unfortunately there are still things she must get right. Example given, knowing exactly where her apartment is. She again tries to invade her cute neighbour’s home, which causes him to ask if she wants to live in his apartment. At this stage, there are reasons to suspect indeed. But there’s no time enough for our two character to devour each other with their eyes, so, after a last invitation to bang anytime from our delicious neighbour Emily goes back home to get a shower and dress for work.

Her white boots, however, have an unfortunate encounter with a material of animal origin. She’s naturally disgusted and deals with it making another Instagram post. Discovering, by the way, that she’s gaining more and more followers for ther photos of fictional! Paris.

Sidenote: this scene can mean two things from yours truly’s point of view. Either Emily’s next days are going to be shitty or she’s going to be ultimately lucky. In France or Spain is very common to wish good luck with the word merde (or well, mierda in Spanish). In both cases it comes from the times people went to theatre or opera house in carriages drawn with horses. So a load of shit meant: you are in the greatest show in town. But probably is not that deep.

At Savoir, la Plouc is decaying as Emily’s sobriquet, and only Julien greets her with it. Besides, Emily has learn to strike back. Or rather is her smartphone the one she uses to retort Va te faire foutre! Which mean Fuck you but it’s not that imaginative. Why not mange tes morts, or some decent French swearing. Anyway well done, Emily, because this makes her earn Julien’s respect.

... But evidently not Sylvie’s. She is clearly contemplating the void and wondering if some kind of karmic justice has sent her this girl that can’t figure out why is la plouc instead of le plouc or won’t pronounce the name of the fragance De L’Heure from Lavaux. Sylvie doesn’t want to listen her ideas for promoting Lavaux’s last product. A little discussion insues between the two ladies. Must luxury remain an enclosed world? Should it be democratized in some way? Of course Emily thinks the point of view of an outsider could help, but, could you point at the outsider in this scene? Of course Emily is not French and still dealing with the continuous cultural clash. But she doesn’t seem an outsider by any means. And, ah. There’s a launch party for De L’Heure so she better hurry up and put some thing that doesn’t resemble whatever she’s wearing.

Was that fashion advice from Sylvie? Who knows. In any case, Emily looks quite pretty with her black dress. The handbag is funny but highly debatable. And she’s overjoyed and bubbly as she pursues trays full of delicious food. Which is a faux pas, from Sylvie’s point of view.

Enter Antoine Lambert from Maison Lavaux a.k.a. another Frenchman who is going to be attracted towards Emily’s many charms. Because that’s what Frenchmen do in this series. She fails to understand what a nose means in the world of fragances - it’s not that harsh to figure out, sometimes I wonder why they have written her like that; she’s suffering a severe case of cultural clash, but it doesn’t mean she’s stupid, argh -. Antoine is creeptractive. Especially in the next scene.

Which takes place in this terrace with the gorgeous view of a glittering Eiffel Tower. This makes Emily smile and would do everyone else who had the opportunity to assist. This makes up for Sylvie saying that she’s talking too much about bussiness during the party, which is something she should not do.

Monsieur le Creeptractive follows her and tests the fragance on her skin. A really weird dialogue about how she should have a French boyfriend because you learn French in bed... Yeah, sure.  Emily profess her fidelity to her engaged to be engaged Doug back in Chicago. Something that he doesn’t deserve but more on that immediately after. He smells her in a way that would make many women shudder and run away and compliments (?) her on smelling like expensive sex. Yikes yikes yikes.

All in all, is a successful night for Emily, but as she discovers the next day, she’s supposed to work not in the promotion of De l’Heure, but in some product  called Vaga-Jeune to help woment to combat vaginal dryness. Is that a mean move by Sylvie, or it’s only a logical thing for Emily to start there, given she has experience in pharmaceuticals? Discuss. She also tells our heroine not to be too flirty with Antoine, who is married to one of her very good friends. But immediately after Julien drops the bomb: Sylvie is actually Antoine’s mistress. Oops.

In order to deal with the amount of unwanted information, Emily texts to Mindy and they go for a dinner. Mindy gives her a few tips to survive in the complicate environment of a city where everyone is having affairs with everyone. As if in Paris - like everywhere else - didn’t exist people who doesn’t care about sex. In this universe, Emily still can’t wrap her head around the endemic lack of conyugal fidelity in this series.

We learn more about Mindy, who maybe would deserve more than being only Asian token character which is supportive of the main one just because. Indeed Mindy is for now my favourite character here, along with Sylvie. Mindy turns out to be in Paris because her millionaire zipper king father wanted her in the bussiness school, but, since living in Paris was one of her dreams, Mindy dropped it and became a nanny instead. Now she’s been cut off by dad, but she’s free and, besides, she finds funny to have grown up surrounded by nannies and now being one of them.

The temptation of MIndy taking over Emily in this series is too big when just in the next scene she thinks she can “educate the chef a little bit about customer service” without even tasting her steak, which she wants done more. Customer are not always right; some of them behave like annoying assholes. She swallows her words as Gabriel from downstairs emerges from the kitchen because of course he’s the chef. Somewhat that convinces her she should taste the steak before giving her opinion. It turns out the steak is wonderful, it was wonderful the whole time. Emily please. Try to behave.

(also Mindy wouldn’t mind to taste the chef instead of the steak, which is understandable)

Next day Emily is happily roaming around the market with a little hat perched on her head and the mind full of Chicago Boyfriend Doug. The little hat is so stupid that it’s almost charming, like someone more fit for a musical than for real people walking on real streets. She seems to have befriended the woman from the boulangerie, too! However, the happiness is to be shortlived...

... Because Doug, as his first scene already indicated, is someone who can’t bother to take his ass into a plane and fly to Paris where there is nothing to do while expecting for his girlfriend to come back from job. This guy must have one, but he’s so lazy that one wonders if he inherited it. Notice that, unlike in Paris, there are cars in Chicago. Doug proceeds then to inelegantly dump his girlfriend by phone.

Very fitting to have Emily standing just next to the Panthéon when the call is over and their relationship as dead as the people inside.

Emily is logically sad after this and the weather seems to agree with her mood, probably she cried to her sleep, or at least she shed some tears. He doesn’t deserve it, honey.

Her mood doesn’t improve when, at the office, she discovers a new thing. Yes, you have grammatical gender in French, as well as in other European languages. She is puzzled because, starting her campaign for Vaga-Jeune, she discovers vagine is a masculine word in French. She doesn’t understand it, and, in typical Emily fashion, she decides the problem is with this language she knows virtually nothing about.

She also learns a very important word for her future life in Paris: grève, which means strike. And it’s not going only a vagina strike. But who knows, she lives in a parallel universe so maybe there are no strikes there (since there is no public transport and/or services on sight even if we know it exist somewhere). And of course, post something on her Instagram account about how vaginas are not masculine.

During her (daily, one guess) conversation with Mindy during the lunch break, Emily loses at last this overoptimistic side of her that makes the character annoying and vents a little about her general exasperation. She thinks she’ll never learn the language (but girl, you barely tried, don’t be so harsh with yourself), or be simply tolerated by her workmates, or even understand how the city was built. She’ll be all right, Mindy insists, not very impressed at her friend’s disperation.

Which follows is one of the most cringeworthy deus-ex-machina I have seen, and adequately being a deus-ex-machina it comes from l’Élysée. Wink wink, mythology aficionados.

By the way, it’s that the façade which gives to the main courtyard of the French presidential palace? Yes it is. Here I am wondering where this footage came from and when it was filmed because I am that way. Seems the flag is at half mast from that point of view so... this could help to know in which moment was filmed... But screw that, you aren’t here for my personal obsessions, so lets go right to the point.

Somewhat Carla Bruni finds Emily’s post about vaginas utterly fascinating, to the extent that she has to share it with Brigitte Macron. And of course the current French First Lady (even if officially there is not such title in France) agrees and posts it in her Twitter account. We only see Fictional!Brigitte from her back. Real Brigitte doesn’t have accounts on social networks, by the way, which is understandable since after a while one gets tired of playing the game of guessing if the one who made the mysoginist and idiotic post is from the extreme right or the extreme left (it’s a difficult thing to tell apart, I assure you). Of course Emily’s post gets viral.

Brigitte Macron just retweeted you, bitch! is not bad as unexpected sentence on a screenplay in 2020, congratulations. Her partners at Savoir are overjoyed and suddenly Emily can share a table with them, yay! Though evolving from la plouc to our Vaga-Jeune is not really improving that much I guess? So that’s the end of the episode and Emily’s life seems not-so-that-depressing all of a sudden. So thank you Brigitte.

And that was Episode 2 of Emily in Paris. Our heroine was slightly less annoying than on first one, probably because the reality of being in a totally different country is starting to hit her and she’s had a few humblings by this moment. For the next one, we’ll know more about Monsieur le Creeptractive & the nonsense of fragance advertisements.

[danyellelovessurveys]

lets get personal.

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

When You’re Looking Like That - Westlife

Hysteria - Def Leppard

Beautiful - Flickerstick

Hello My Love - Westlife

For What It’s Worth - Buffalo Springfield (covered by Anti-Flag)

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? Michael Rosenbaum - Smallville

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

4: What do you think about most? Too much shit... because I have BAD anxiety.

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say? Headed out.

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?  With

7: What’s your strangest talent? Pick up things on the floor with my toes.

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence) Are crazy/ Are a pain in the ass.

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you? Yes

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar? 2005

11: Do you have any strange phobias? MANY

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose? No

13: What’s your religion? Wiccan

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing? Chillin Out

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? Behind

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band? They aren’t totally a band... but I have to say Westlife... if we are talking proper band, either Def Leppard or Avenged Sevenfold or Flickerstick

17: What was the last lie you told? Anytime I play nice with my dad

18: Do you believe in karma? Yes

19: What does your URL mean? Random Crap nickname.

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength? Weakness is my emotions, Strength... I have survived this long.

21: Who is your celebrity crush? It is actually a hockey player... Martin Necas of the Carolina Hurricanes

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping? Does sex in a hotub with other people in the room count??

23: How do you vent your anger?

24: Do you have a collection of anything? All kinds of things.

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? Texting/ Messaging

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become? No

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love? Chalkboards/ The Middle

28: What’s your biggest “what if”? What If the last 20 years never happened.

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens? Sure why not?

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm. Table/ Couch

31: Smell the air. What do you smell? Ham

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to? Oh there are so many!

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast? East

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender? Nicky Byrne

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

36: Define Art. Something I just don’t get.

37: Do you believe in luck? Yes

38: What’s the weather like right now? Sunny early evening in the 50s.

39: What time is it? 7:14

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed? I don’t drive, though I have been in a couple benders....

41: What was the last book you read? The Secrets of Birthdays

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline? No

43: Do you have any nicknames? Yeah

44: What was the last film you saw? Mom’s on a date with a vampire.

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had? Thyroid Storm, not an injury... (there are plenty of those) but the storm was the worst thing of my life.

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly? When I was little

47: Do you have any obsessions right now? Always, I have OCD

48: What’s your sexual orientation? Straight, I like guys.

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you? I am sure... but I don’t care

50: Do you believe in magic? Yes

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong? Yes

52: What is your astrological sign? Scorpio

53: Do you save money or spend it? Both

54: What’s the last thing you purchased? Coffee Creamer

55: Love or lust? I think one can turn to the other

56: In a relationship? I wish

57: How many relationships have you had? A few

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue? No

59: Where were you yesterday? Home..

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you? Yes, my bed jacket

61: Are you wearing socks right now? Yes

62: What’s your favourite animal? Giraffes, Manatees, Kitties

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you? Eyes, and a full flirt package

64: Where is your best friend? Not sure where she is

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

66: What is your heritage? 1/4 German 1/4 Dutch 1/2 crap  

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM? Almost asleep

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off? Duh

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend? Yes

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do? Help that Pup

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid? A - They would figure it out, from the look on my face/ B - Live it Up!/ C - Terrified

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love. Love

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it? Hello My Love & When You’re Looking Like That - Both Westlife

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number? No Clue

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship? Trust

77: How can I win your heart? Play Hockey? I don’t know... changes with my moods

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity? Huh?

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far? Getting my kitty Binx, even though he can be a pain in the ass.

80: What size shoes do you wear? 8 1/2

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

82: What is your favourite word? Fuck

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart. Mom

84: What is a saying you say a lot? Not really a phrase, more like a word... and that is Fuck.

85: What’s the last song you listened to? Roll Me Away - Bob Seger

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours? Blue/ Pink/ Purple.

87: What is your current desktop picture? Ravenclaw wallpaper.

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be? At this point in time, there is a good chance of that.

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on? Wat is  my true worst fear.

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do? Scream!

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power? The power to make people/ animals live forever

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again? HA HA.... Playing with the Serge.

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? The loss of my Kitty...

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be? Nicky from Westlife.

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? In a perfect world,  I would be going to see Westlife perform.

96: Do you have any relatives in jail? I have in the past.

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car? Yes.

98: Ever been on a plane? Yes.

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say? STAY THE FUCK HOME!