#i am the most indecisive writer

[firawren]

Me editing my writing:

I have two versions of this paragraph that I need to decide between. Let's read them over and decide which one is better, delete the other one, and move on.

*30 minutes later*

I now have four versions of this paragraph.

[kentofic]

i will finish this nanami fic i will finish this nanami fic i WILL finish this nanami fic 🫠

[utilitycaster]

Do you think this new option could lead to a break up in the party and some of the characters leaving the group? Because I can't see everyone agreeing that this is the best solution, but I also think Ashton is stubborn enough to refuse to consider anything else

This is going to be a very long answer for what is a pretty short question that could be answered in one sentence, and here's why.

I've gotten a lot of questions in the past week or so that are specifically asking me what I think the future will be - for campaign 3, and for Critical Role generally. And I've gotten a little frustrated by them, which is somewhat uncharacteristic of me because I love having opinions, but the fact is, I don't know and I don't even have strong opinions. So I dug into that, and why people might be asking these things more than usual, and I really think it's because the narrative of this campaign is so constantly under threat of derailment or going in the same old circles that pretty much anyone in the fandom with any sense of narrative structure, and what makes for a well-crafted story is like "so...what's happening." Which is translating as coming to me, a person who is very good at sounding confident and knowledgeable.

I do not fucking know. I share this frustration, and I cannot be the person to clear it up. i am not even the best at narrative or analysis in this fandom; as I pretty frequently state I took the hard STEM option with regards to my education so while I read a lot and have a pretty good sense for the lay person, there are actual like, trained and published writers. For what it's worth several of them are my mutuals and while I'm not putting the rest of this post on them I do feel safe saying they agree that the lack of narrative direction is at the heart of most people's frustrations with this campaign, even if they enjoy the characters. But getting back to the point, I do not know.

Here's where I stand on the actual plot before I go back to the bigger picture. I think that unless Bells Hells decide on their course of action pretty quickly, no ending will really feel satisfying due to that sense of directionlessness - and there are arguments for Bells Hells to take either the Arch Heart or the Accord's plan, though I think the Accord's is far superior, but they need to pick one.

Because of the ongoing issues with this party lacking perspectives that tied in well to this story and having to hinge everything on either one singular interpretation of one single instance in extraordinary circumstances (eg: Dorian), or stuff that feels, as I've said before, retconned, I have generally been extremely amenable to Bells Hells losing party members either through a split or through character deaths. This is not out of any sort of vindictiveness or dislike of characters, but just a hope that now that they know the vibe, the cast will make a character who has a perspective that is relevant to the story (which, FCG is not an ideal example because they happened to be the character who had perhaps best grown from their original concept to fit into the themes of this campaign, but Braius obviously is a very strong character informed by the story as well). I also think that a lot of the indecisiveness is part of the characters' various natures and that will also be a factor, especially since a new character can be both decisive, have a clear point of view, and be a lot more comfortable pissing off the rest of the party to assert it. So: if Bells Hells as they currently stand can decide what to do quickly, no need to break up! But if they can't, yeah, it would be to their and the story's benefit to do so. That's before we get into, for example, the sacrifice required from specifically Imogen or Fearne for the Arch Heart's plan; Ashton is not the one who has to risk their own autonomy for the rest of eternity. They might die in battle, but they will not become a husk housing an ancient hunger. I think the people who might have to do so get to decide.

Now: it may seem counterintuitive to demand a clear direction from a TTRPG, when part of the appeal is that we don't know how it will end, but the thing is, with the past campaigns, we did not know if the party would succeed but we knew that they wanted to do. Vox Machina could have fallen to Vecna but we always knew they were going to fight Vecna. The Mighty Nein's decisions not to get involved with the war are not indecision but rather a very clear decision (do not get involved). Their later reversal of that decision similarly follows from who they are and the richness of their pasts.

Bells Hells does not have that, and the endless circular conversations are both circular in game and a vicious cycle out of it; because we've always been focused on this plot from very early on and because the characters were not developed as strongly, we have a lot of very indecisive people who are too trapped in this crisis to develop and become decisive. In a way, it feels like Matt's been something like the Arch Heart here: saying "oh, THIS would be interesting, I wonder what will happen" at everything when it's like "ok but consequences are like, important, and maybe you should let things play out. I mean, two cycles isn't great but it is still only two; maybe you should actually let your children/players figure this out, even if it doesn't fit your idea of what should happen, instead of throwing yet another new thing at them."

So: I don't know and I don't have answers about Campaign 3 events at this point because, again, as someone who has a pretty good sense of what makes for a satisfying narrative, it has frequently subverted those requirements (which, to be clear, is bad - it's not genre subversion or a masterful play on expectations, it's subverting actual satisfying narrative beats; as someone said on one of my other posts in not quite so many words, it's like storyline-baiting). I know I tend to present my points with confidence, and I am pretty confident about a lot of things like CR lore and said sense of narrative, but like...maybe this guess on the fandom vibe is incorrect, but I think I'm getting these questions because people are saying "hey, do you know where we're going? I think I am reading this map wrong" to me and I'm here to say "no, you're reading it fine, we've gone off the road and are just kinda crashing through underbrush, and maybe we'll hit another road and continue on that and I can give some insight, but also we might go off a cliff, no way to tell."

[the-brash-spud]

Not gonna lie. The more I look into how they portray Bruce grieving about Jason, the more disappointed I am. They want to hurt him mentally all the time yet won't allow him to go through said mental aggony. It just seems to be so indecisive by the writers.

For example I find the whole thing of Batman wanting to off Joker in his grief and being stopped by Superman as cool and shit, but if they went with that as to why Batman didn't kill Joker then it should have continued for longer.

I mean, I would've loved a small series where Batman is out for blood. As in, he goes out of his way to try to track down the Joker and actually kill him, so all of JL needs to take turns to be on a bat duty. I think it would've been so heavy for us to watch through their eyes just how badly Batman went off kilter with grief, to the point they have to go out of their way to make sure their friend doesn't do something stupid.

Of course, he'd also manage to work around them, or generally when they're not there as everyone has their own lives. So sooner or later, he will definitely have tracked Joker. Let's say that after the initial murder attempt, he tried to do it three times more before stopping completely.

Maybe because Tim showed up or because he went to grief counselling, and as much as he was still heavily grieving (and still being hard on criminals), he doesn't go out of his way to kill Joker and people wanting to associate with him. Maybe that's when Tim showed up? Before, he was too afraid to make Bruce stop with his brutality by threats as then he was just as likely (in Tim's mind) to off him in his quest to avenge, but now (even though still shaking like a wet cold puppy) he could try to make Batman stop with being so hard on criminals. I think it would be a great wake-up call that a child that was afraid of him so much that he was shaking just looking at him but still felt as if they had to do something to stop Batman. Can you imagine the guilt? When you were supposed to give people hope from within the darkness of Gotham but lost your way so much, you were pretty much chocking out that hope and safety of better future? Making a child feel like they had to confront you? I'd imagine that guilt would've been a great narrative block to their relationship if explored further.

Additionally, imagine being a Joker goon at that time of grieving. You're used to having a gun be hit out of your hand with a battarang. That's normal, but this time, it got logged into the wall right by your head? And Batman loudly grunted in anger or however you would describe it. You'd think he was annoyed that he missed, but something is clearly off. The battarang seems a bit too sharp, too much like a knife, and thrown a bit too close to your face to be accidental. And when the sinking feeling of danger really sends in, you're in a whole world of pain before waking up in a hospital, most likely with at least one injury that won't heal fully.

Just saying, the writers fumbled a bit.

[2aceofspades]

Now that we're entering into 2024, I'm asking some artists and writers that I follow:

1) What is the one piece you're most proud of from this past year?

2) What are some pieces that you would have liked more people to see? If you can include links, I'd love to go check them out!

3) What were your top three favorite pieces (art, comics, fics, etc) that someone else has made this past year?

(As always, no pressure to respond! Feel free to just ignore, or let me know if you'd rather I not send you these kinds of asks in the future.)

These questions are getting me thinking oh boy...

1) Okay um...I'll just put my top three here cuz I'm indecisive hehe~

2) Uhm...I guess I don't have any. I'm just on here for fun so I do my best to not care about views and numbers and all that.

3) 1: THIS ASK answered by @/evenmoreofadisaster (it literally rotted my brain for like two weeks straight if not longer gah-/pos)

2: The Jacob's Ladder by @/tapakah0 the story was so so SO well done I am still in AWE

And 3: @/pinetreevillain 's comics in general gah I just love his style so so much

[yourtwistedlies]

❝ women’s hearts are lethal weapons ❞

val ! ✩ she/her ✩ minor ✩ jason grace’s gf (REAL) ✩ speak now obsessed ✩ gracie abrams lovebot ✩ summer baby ✩ certified procrastinator ✩ professional listener ✩ pathological people pleaser ✩ general amaya’s #1 fan ✩ fitz vacker defender ✩ honorary grammar police ✩ kpop stan (mostly ggs) ✩ my moots’ cheerleader ✩ under the illusion i can write ✩ somewhat smart ✩ cabin 13 girl ✩

dni: if you are racist, homophobic, xenophobic, support kill all ___, sexist, 18+ only, religiophobic, creepy, toxic, or literally just a jerk, please leave!

byi: i swear sometimes!! i also adore using cute nicknames and pet names for my moots!! if you don’t feel comfortable w/ that or anything else, please let me know <33

moots - wattpad - ao3 - carrd - follower event (coming soon ⁉️) - save the children!

•̩̩͙⁺ the basics ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘

call me valerie/val or twisted!!

she/her, straight (heterosexual), minor (18+ only acc’s please do not follow), 18+ do not interact unless i interact first or we are moots (on my list or to be added- i am the judge of who is to be added), cancer (zodiac, but i don’t believe in them), Christian (i post about it sometimes), << summer baby, entp (mbti), 8w7 (enneagram), ambivert, slytherin, cabin 13, shade (guys i swear i wasn’t trying to be edgy or smth with the past two and this 😭😭 i took the official quizzes i promise lmao), swiftie, kpop fan, staying up writing until 4am gives me life, purple is the best color (this is not up to debate, only yellow even comes close), proud notes app writer, CATS > DOGS (occasionally my verdict changes), bunny lover, chronic platonic sofitzer, i’m either hyperactive or extremely tired (there is no in between), people say im smart, but sometimes i feel like the biggest idiot ever lmao, and ofc dex dizznee’s much needed publicist (my favorite role of mine ever)!!!

•̩̩͙⁺ music ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘

taylor swift, olivia rodrigo, sza, conan gray, alicia keys, emei, gracie abrams, maisie peters, sabrina carpenter, laufey, queen riri (rihanna), adele, beabadoobee, tiffany day, le sserafim, ive, newjeans, itzy, nmixx, stay-c, aespa, everglow, txt (baby fan), illit ＆ more kpop, lizzy mcalpine, pheobe bridgers, nessa barrett, pinkpantheress, claire rosinkranz, lyn lapid, alessia cara, reneé rapp, mckenna grace, and more!!

as i hope you can tell, i like a lot of music :)

•̩̩͙⁺ books ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘

pjo, hoo, (never read toa, but yes, ik what happens in tbm), the rrverse, kotlc, city spies, ss (spy school), alex rider (not done with rr), the academy for the unbreakable arts,

and my many other fandoms i’ve forgotten about (dead magisterium fandom oop-)

i’ll add more fandoms as i remember them lol

•̩̩͙⁺ ships ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘

rayllum, clauderry (stfu they’re adorable), percabeth (otp energy), sokeefe, dexiana, tiana (yes i know im the most indecisive bitch ever shut up you toad /jjjj i actually love u platonically), jason grace x ME (/j but i do love him lol), and more!!

•̩̩͙⁺ blogs ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘

side blog: @yourtangledpromises

taylor blog: @iknowplxces (guys this is so abandoned + has my old intro 🤮 ignore this js trust - august 15 2024 val)

and perhaps more?? (muahahaha)

•̩̩͙⁺ side note ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘

if you’d like to be added to my moots list, or talk, please tell me (by wonder girls)!!

if we’re moots we’re actually bffs now (you just don’t notice it yet)

if i don’t respond to your ask/tag/rb/literally anything immediately i am not ignoring you!! i’m just lazy or busy and will do it later <33

im your biggest fan btw

1 Corinthians 16:14

with love,

valerie

[pepsiiwho]

I was not only tagged but also texted and, if you can believe it— called— to do this by @koipalm so. Here I am. Doing it. Huzzah. 

1) how many works do you have on ao3?

71! (jesus) 

2) what's your total ao3 word count?

260,293… bullshit numbers fr… 71 fics only JUST hitting 260k...

3) what are your top five fics by kudos?

A quick foreword I don’t care about kudos as a system and I don't use them as a benchmark for my work at all. I suppose they transfer over easily to mean ‘likes’ but I think most ao3 readers ‘likes’ are flimsy currency. Now comments? That I can get behind.  To Be Seen (And To See)  Two Of The Worst People You Know Are Talking In Low Whispers In The Room Over Live, Laugh, Love (And Other Things Luffy Can't Eat) Acute Stress Response Touch, A Commodity We Both Lack In Spades

4) what fandoms do you write for?

My ao3 will list a lot but I’m only going to consider fandoms I actually enjoy writing for, not just one offs or gifts I got grouped into. So, having said that, my main haunts are:  Hades [1/2] (Active) Metaphor: ReFantazio (Active) Haikyuu!! Fe3h DRV3

5) do you respond to comments? why or why not?

Always. I'll respond to a backlog right now, but I feel that comments are the lifeblood of ao3. You get all this work for free and most writers only ask for one thing— recuperation. No money, no content in exchange, just a few short words of encouragement. Considering the high regard I keep commenting on, it's only right to pay that respect back in turn. Also, duh, I wanna talk about the concepts I wrote about more!!

6) what's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I am too indecisive with my own work so I’m going to take the cop out answer and give one fic per fandom.  For Metaphor: ReFantazio, I Hear You Walking Even Now. It doesn’t seem sad, but to me it is a deeply upsetting piece because of the finality of it. Basilio gets this big house he’d always wanted and he’s alone. And he will never be able to enjoy the home with his brother as he wanted. Whatever. For Hades And Here It Is, Our Final Night Alive. I almost forgot about this piece because the magic of two men kissing bewitched me. But this was such a sad send off and imagining what I think might have happened with Hypnos and Melinoe. Go read it, the comments want me dead.  For Fire Emblem, To Mourn You Is To Live, Heartless. No one has read this because no one on earth gives a fuck at all about Claude Von Riegan/Igantz Victor but Im OBSESSED and I think this story is so terribly sad. These two might as well be ocs, but I think my writing shines in these somber pieces…

7) what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Can I give a blanket answer and say porn? All my porn is pretty happy because my faves get laid…. But if that doesn’t count, uhhh… I don’t know. We’ll say my oc x canon fic because the whole concept is like, married bliss. Whole Package Baby, I Like The Way You Fit

8) do you get hate on fics?

Once or twice. I always respond in a weirdly pointed way and in both cases they’ve apologized so. Yay?

9) do you write smut?

Yes! I started for the first time a few months ago and have been unable to stop since. Hallelujah.

10) do you write crossovers?

I haven’t written any in a long time BUT I love crossovers inherently for what they are. The more indulgent the better. 

11) have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yes. It was a Chainsaw Man fic. My lawyer friend got the person’s account completely nuked though, it was great. 

12) have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, I think… 4 of them? All into mandarin! How fun. 

13) have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Yes I’ve worked on pieces informally with numerous writer friends of mine and more ‘officially’ (if anything on ao3 can be granted such a word) in DRV3 and MRF  

14) what's your all time favorite ship?

…This is a hard question because I feel like an ‘all time favorite’ needs to be one you continually come back to regardless of your other tastes changing….. I… probably should give this to a Danganronpa ship, but I rather not so instead I’m going to say either Claudenatz or Osalev… insane rarepairs no one gives a fuck about will do me in everytime.

15) what's the wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

All of them. I am a chronic unfinished wip poster. Right now I am working most aggressively to finish I'll See You First, my uh, most recent long fic. But as for ‘abandoned’ titles…. Probably I Don't Like How I Look At You. It's relatively new but I still think it reads well and I’m still into the fandom so all isn’t lost.  Wait wait no, I take it all back i want to finish more then anything else my bullshit Haikyuu fic My Real Boyfriend Is Real He's Just From Moscow, Russia— Actually. I think this fic is so fucking good but I have to FINISH IT. I probably never will but the WHOLE thing is drafted out and ready to go. Just needs to be made haha. 

16) what are your writing strengths?

Uh. I truly think I’m good at everything, generally, and infallible. I'm gods gift to man, and reader, so it isn't easy to pick ONE thing I'm strong with.... But of all my strengths, of which there are many, I’m most proud of my character work and ability to convey setting and tone. You’ll never say my work bores, I know that for dance sure. 

17) what are your writing weaknesses?

Quantity. I struggle with filling word counts. I don’t write a lot. I want to write more. 

18) thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I think more often then not it doesn’t land and just reads as an amateur writing decision. Generally, when writing character who speak different languages (fictional or otherwise) I think it's more efficient and readable to just put something to the effect of “[name] begins speaking quickly in [language], the words sounding [description] to his ears” If the point of view character wouldn’t understand it, I don’t see why we as the audience should either.  Past that, a worse crime if you ask me— it breaks immersion badly. In fic especially, I’m never going to open google translate to get the full meaning of what you wrote and if you’re going to translate why even write it like that?  This is for all languages btw, if you write in japanese I don’t think your character should start speaking spanish and suddenly I see a totally different character alphabet. This feels like a holdover from visual media though. Webcomics, animation, shit like that. This is opinion, of course, but if you do this think about why and what effect it has on the work.

19) first fandom you wrote for?

Personally? Sailor Moon. Publicly? AOT. 

20) favourite fic you've ever written?

I cannot possibly answer this. Theres so many variables that go into making a piece a ‘favourite’... I genuinely don’t know.  Anything under my ao3 account is a fic I adore. I delete fics the moment they don’t inspire joy in me haha. Sorry. 

Uhh, sharing the wealth. @quill-and-paper-cranes , @grayvamp @antelopunny @freya-faust okay now YOU guys do it.

[strangerthingsreversebigbang]

In case you missed them, here are the first ten works posted from the Stranger Things Reverse Big Bang!

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Cover Worthy by @stevesno1simp | Art by @raven-cl

Rating: E

Warning(s): No Archive Warnings Apply

Character(s): Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington, Original Male Character(s)

Relationship(s): Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson

Summary: Steve has been crushing on rock star Eddie Munson, front man for the popular metal band Corroded Coffin since they made it big. But he never dreamed that landing a job as a photographer at the most popular metal magazine in the world would lead him to a photoshoot with him…

Survival of the Sister by @skepsiss | Art by @ent-is-indecisive

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Characters: Max Mayfield

Relationships: Maxine "Max" Mayfield/Lucas Sinclair

Summary: Max is a young knight who has lost everything to the darkness of the Upside Down. The last thing she can lose is her life. She puts it all on the line to save her family, friends, and Hawkins. Fate has another idea for her as she struggles to recall her happiest memories that will bring her back to life and toward Lucas, who is desperately searching for her. Overall, it is a short, emotional piece about Max fighting back death with sheer willpower and then getting to relish in being reunited with Lucas

Homesteddie Farms by @artaxlivs | Art by @doomcheese

Rating: Teens and Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings

Character(s): Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Max Mayfield, Dustin Henderson

Relationship(s): Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson

Summary : “I thought you were helping me with the morning feeding?”

“Stevie! I am helping!” With his free hand, Eddie motions to the gaggle of animals clamoring for their attention.

“You’re making another Tiktok video. That’s not helping.” Steve sighs but his lips pull up in a hint of a smile.

Jabbing a finger into Steve’s side to make him yelp and skitter away, Eddie taps the record button and grins at the camera on his phone, “Hey-howdy-hey folks! Welcome to another beauuu-ti-ful morning here at Homesteddie Farms! Say hi to the farm fans, Steve.”

Steve huffs a breath, before shaking his head and saying in a fond tone, “Hey farm fans!” Then he grunts out an 'oof' as one of the goats stands up on it’s hind legs, head butts Steve in the thigh and begins to nibble on the raggedy bottom of his cut off overall shorts. “Madmartigan! Get down.”

Echoes of You by @writer-in-theory | Art by @yellowsweater-bluevest

Rating: Teens and Up Audience

Warning(s): No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationship(s): Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Background Robin Buckley/Chrissy Cunningham

Summary: Five years after leaving Hawkins, Eddie Munson comes home to take care of his Uncle Wayne. He never imagined having to face the ghosts of what he'd left behind.

When you look into the mirror, tell me what you see by @slippy-slip | Art by @cxwzkeys

Rating: Mature

Warning(s): No Archive Warnings Apply

Character(s): Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley, Dustin Henderson, Max Mayfield, Mike Wheeler, Lucas Sinclair, Nancy Wheeler, Jonthan Byers

Relationship(s): Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson

Summary: Steve moves away but when he comes back to visist, he’s not quite the same. Some cope with changes better than others.

Work it On Out by @lemonlimelights | Art by @chuchayucca

Rating: Teen and Up

Archive Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence -specifcally the aftermath- blood and injury

Characters: Alexei, Joyce Byers, Will Byers, Jonathan Byers, Eleven | Jane Hopper, Nancy Wheeler

Parings: Alexei/Joyce Byers, Minor Nancy Wheeler/Jonathan Byers, Minor Eleven | Jane Hopper/Mike Wheeler`

Summary: Alexei lives and Joyce can't stop thinking about him. Her kids catch on quick.

Love Sick by @lady-lostmind | Art by @ahhrenata

Rating: Teens and Up

Warning(s): No Archive Warnings Apply

Character(s): Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson

Relationship(s): Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson

Summary:

Eddie rolls over with a groan. He feels awful. He can’t breath out of his nose, there’s so much pressure in his head he feels like it might explode and his throat feels like he swallowed a cup of razors. He lets out a truly pathetic whimper, the sound catching in his throat as it turns into a cough. He stretches his arm out, feeling around for Steve and is met with cold, empty sheets. He whines again and finally pries his eyes open.

“Stevie?”

I Think of Thee by @house-of-chant | Art by @sunflowerharrington

Rating: Teens and Up

Warning(s): No Archive Warnings Apply

Character(s): Eddie, Chrissy, Gareth, Jeff, Unnamed Freak, Max, Ms O'Donnell

Pairing(s): Eddie Muson/Chrissy Cunningham

Summary: Retaking senior year was not on Eddie's life plan. Neither was retaking Shakespearean Literature. At least Chrissy's in the class this year, though. AU - Eddie and Chrissy were childhood friends.

Do You Think I Have Forgotten (about you?) by StupidWithSteddie | Art by @artbean

Rating: Teens and Up

Warning(s): No Archive Warnings Apply

Character(s): Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley, Nancy Wheeler, Jonathan Byers, Gareth (Stranger Things), Unnamed Freak (Stranger Things), Jeff (Stranger Things), Chrissy Cunningham

Relationship(s): Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Jonathan Byers/Nancy Wheeler, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington

Summary:

Steve Harrington didn’t know much but he knew one thing — he hated Eddie Munson and he always would.

--

or the battle of the bands au where steve and eddie have a complicated past and they're forced to confront it through the only way they know how - music

The Very First Night by @sourw0lfs | Art by @sunflowerharrington

Rating: Mature

Warning(s): No Archive Warnings Apply

Character(s):Eddie Munson, Chrissy Cunningham, Gareth (Stranger Things), Jeff (Stranger Things), Unnamed Freak (Stranger Things), Chrissy Cunningham's Father (mentioned), Unnamed Band Manager

Relationship(s): Chrissy Cunningham/Eddie Munson, Chrissy Cunningham & Corroded Coffin

Summary:

"The rest of their set passes in a blur, some performative instinct Chrissy didn’t even know she had kicking in somewhere between the first and second songs. It leaves her feeling exhilarated, like she could fly if she tried.

Leaving the stage with the rest of the band feels right. Laughing as they walk through backstage to pack away their things again feels right.

Chrissy decides right then and there that she’s made the right choice, even if they never make it further than this.

OR: Five times something almost happens after Chrissy joins Corroded Coffin and one time it does"

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Stay tuned for more incredible works from the Stranger Things Reverse Big Bang!

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[obsessioncollector]

haiiiii peyton ^_^ what were your favorite books this year?

Hiiii Lane!! 🤗💝 I hope you're having a lovely holiday or just a lovely day if you're not celebrating! I am so indecisive when it comes to picking faves so enjoy my non-answer 😊 I'm also going to tag you celia @symptomofloves bc you said you want to see my faves! ❤️

I would say the overarching theme of the year has been longing, desire, eroticism, and obsession, in many manifestations. So I'm going to list a cluster of excellent and often insanity-inducing (compliment!) books that fall into that category, in the order of when I read them (so unranked):

Dennis Cooper — George Miles cycle: THE obsessioncollector saga... Definitely not for everyone bc it's very graphic and upsetting, but he captures the desire for understanding and connection so well. I read it at the beginning of the year so it really set the tone for the year to come.

Mary Gaitskill — Bad Behavior: A story collection! She is one of those writers who articulates things I never realized I feel—reading her is such a revelation!

D.H. Lawrence — The Rainbow; Women in Love: Would transitioning have saved her? I'm kidding but truly he captures the experience of being a teen girl and young woman so well. (These two books are a diptych so I get to lump them together.)

Kathy Acker — In Memoriam to Identity: Read this so you can enjoy the sadly defunct @kathyack-blog-blog 😊 Like Mary Gaitskill in that she captures elements of myself I never knew existed.

Angela Carter — Burning Your Boats: The Collected Stories and The Magic Toyshop: Her most famous work is the story collection The Bloody Chamber, so I also recommend starting there if you want something less daunting than the complete stories. I love Angela Carter! I think I reblogged a gifset of her talking about her work being self-indulgent but she is self-indulgent in the same ways as me! Gothic and elegant and she is such a master of the fairytale/folklore retelling, which I think is so often done in boring and predictable ways.

Edmund White — A Boy's Own Story: All bangers from the very first few pages! Such an eloquent examination of a self-conscious adolescent painfully dedicated to trying to understand himself and others. Reminiscient of that Mishima quote about how he thought he was more mature than the other boys but it was just because he thought about himself more bc he was so insecure </3

And then here are a handful of ones that don't fit into that theme but were nonetheless highlights:

Scholastique Mukasonga — Our Lady of the Nile: Celia is also a Mukasonga fan so you know she has to be good! 😊 This is a collection of interlinked short stories, all set at a Rwandan boarding school. Masterfully combines the more mundane tensions of adolescence with the leadup to the genocide.

Maya Binyam — Hangman: A 2023 release! I don't read many recent releases bc I find it difficult to sift through the hype but I'm so glad I read this one. A treasure and also quite distinctive in terms of the style and structure.

Mae M. Ngai — The Chinese Question: This was my only 5 star nonfiction of the year! Ngai is probably better known for her book about undocumented immigrants in US history, but I read this one bc it was available at my library and it's excellent. It focuses on restrictions on Chinese immigration, both in the US and also South Africa and Australia, around the time of the Gold Rush. Ties into contemporary issues, both in terms of immigration (unsurprisingly) but also in terms of questions of diaspora and cultural identity.

Jhumpa Lahiri — Interpreter of Maladies: I should have read this years ago but I think I unconsciously avoid contemporary writers from bourgeois New England backgrounds bc that's literally me 😭😭😭 Pretty much the platonic idea of a story collection though. All the characters seem so fully realized, in such a small amount of time!

Thomas Mann — Death in Venice and Other Tales: Sometimes people talk about reading to see themselves reflected but Mann is a writer to read if you want to see yourself reflected in the most unflattering light possible 😭 Another writer I'd been putting off for way too long.

Isabella Hammad — Enter Ghost: As I said wrt Angela Carter, I can be wary of anything marketed as a retelling or too intertextual/meta bc I think they're often done poorly, but this is an exception! To be clear, it's not a retelling, but it's centered on a British Palestinian theatre actress who impulsively joins a Palestinian production of Hamlet while visiting her sister. Very intriguing examination of the protagonist trying to understand her own Palestinian identity while also negotiating how to present herself to her family + friends and the world and resists simple dichotomies.

[bilightningwhumper]

Question to readers (and writers, since most of us are readers, lol) of fics/stories here on Tumblr:

Trying to figure out how to keep writing after finishing the October prompt events (behind yes, but catching up steadily). I'm debating making a somewhat flexible schedule? Like, I dunno if I can promise weekly or not because I am indecisive and somewhat perfectionist about my stories. But hey, writing something is something, even if I end up changing it later. Still, I wanted to know if it'd even be worth it, so here's another poll, lol

I'll still make somewhat a schedule for myself no matter what, but I also know from past experience that having others bugging me (friendly, not demanding, of course) to write more has always gotten me to not get into a self-destructive/unmotivated spiral.

Anyway, other poll of my new story idea is still up (linked here).

[sneezemonster15]

I wonder why do you think Megumi and Itadori are portrayed as romantic, but not Suguru and Satoru? Sincerely I want to see your thoughts about it, since to me, Satosugu akways appeared as more ambiguous than Itafushi

Ah. You are right, SatoSugu is more ambiguous than Itafushi. But I really want to finish reading the manga, at least the currently available chapters before I write a comparison. I will though. I promise.

But see. A writer needs to establish certain things before he can establish a romantic dynamic between two same sex characters, to make it believable. It needs to be strategic to be believable in a seamless manner. If two men love each other in a generally heteronormative world, then the writer will definitely establish their sexualities because it's an instinctive response, the audience will wanna see it to believe it.

If two characters are gay, or not straight, the writer will show it. And Gege does. He makes Todo ask such a question to Megumi. He makes Megumi think about it. Megumi says - 'person' when he was specifically asked about a girl. Look at the specific choices the writer is making. He says he only cares for compassion in his prospective mate, and what is Yuuji's USP? Compassion. Yep.

Not Nobara.

Yuuji.

Anyway, from that, we are able to glean information about Megumi's sexuality. And it certainly doesn't look straight. This is all very strategic and deliberate. Megumi is characterised as a self assured person, a thoughtful and introspective person, who knows what he likes and dislikes. In fact, if anyone had bothered to ask Sasuke about his preferences, he would have answered similarly, with a similar attitude too. Hehe.

With Itadori, Gege makes it a point to talk about his sexuality as well. So Itadori is shown as a person who is indecisive. Gege describes him as indecisive. Of course if he is made to be in a position where he needs to think, he will. He is a bit slow, but not a complete idiot. He has a decent learning curve.

He likes tall girls, this is what is told to us. But we are SHOWN something else. When he is asked what girl he likes in his class, he says Ozawa, who was neither tall nor pretty at the time. Isn't it contradictory? Didn't we see the same kind of contradiction with Naruto? Like one would have expected a straight boy to react, he didn't. He didn't objectify girls, like most straight teenage boys would do without a second thought. There is so much conversation about what type of girl her likes. But when finally a tall Ozawa comes along, Yuuji isn't interested, not romantically. Todo asks him the same question and he is baffled so he says something he has been saying for a long time.

People get curious but you wouldn't wanna say something private like this to just anyone no? Especially when you are yourself confused about it. Yuuji is also not like Megumi.

So what you are getting from this is Gege is establishing their traits and sexualities without being too explicit. And we know writers can do it, we have seen it with Naruto. Sasuke and Naruto's sexualities are also questioned and established as not straight, not explicitly but it's clear to perceptive fans, no?

There is a lot of other stuff that confirms ItaFushi.

The characters of Yuuji and Megumi are influenced by Naruto and Sasuke, Gege has admitted it. And I am ready to bet that Gege knows what Naruto the story is truly about.

Gojo outwardly seems like Kakashi but he ain't in the most important way, he isn't a slave to the system, he wants to change the obsolete ways of the system, he is the protector of his students, someone who actually understands them. Sasuke and Megumi are quite alike but Megumi doesn't have Sasuke's conflict. Yuuji is like Naruto characterwise, but he doesn't have Naruto's insecurity. Nobara is like Sakura on the surface, hot headed and loud, but at her core, very different from Sakura.

JJK is like Naruto 2.0. I am not saying it's better or worse. They are two different worlds. What I am saying is that Gege is sort of correcting everything that went wrong with Naruto, in his own manga. Things that fans like us hate. There are a lot of notes I have made about this, but I want to finish the manga first before writing in detail.

I updated my stance on SatoSugu when I got a bit more into jjk. But the reason I am not sure is because we don't see their relationship with the same kind of development like Megumi and Yuuji. Yuuta makes a joke about Gojo finally getting a gf, which he dismisses. And I noticed. But we didn't see Gojo and Geto's relationship being developed from the beginning. By the time Amanai incident shows up, we see them as best friends, they are obviously very close. But it really doesn't seem romantic at that point of time. They mirror each other, they roughhouse, they fuck around together and then find out lol, but they really do seem like good friends. However, I noticed some things with grown up Gojo and Geto, which could indicate a romantic attachment.

The markers I need to see to believe Satosugu is definitely a romantic relationship aren't as established as Megumi and Yuuji's relationship. If it's romantic, the writer will give us this information for sure, one way or the other. But there is a lot to be seen yet. Gege's non linear storytelling will certainly come in handy.

[gyusimp]

°•New Gyutaro fic! 🎉

Hello everyone!

Remember thay I told you that I was working on a new Gyutaro fic with many chapters? My plan is to write it completely or at least a good part to post a chapter weekly on AO3 and not have problems of chapter delays, writer's blocks or just plain laziness lol.

Currently, I have written and translated 5 chapters (very long btw 👀) so I am very excited! and that is why my lack of activity here on Tumbl is due. So I want to share a little of the description/synopsis of the fic and tell me your opinion about the title:

Honestly, I love the first one, but my indecisive ass's need to ask everyone is inevitable lol tell me what you think and I hope it excites you as much as I do

[foxglove-if]

game development update.

hi everyone! i’m sorry for the lack of posts - i have been working and it definitely has gotten a lot busier what with it being the holiday season. on that note, merry belated x-mas to you all!

in terms of working on foxglove, i am looking into possibly asking around for beta readers, and maybe even a co-writer, but that is something that i won’t really venture into at least on this post.

i’ve also been working on coding and writing in my pastime, but i am currently in the process of changing up my writing style. i have been struggling to write the way that i do now, due to the fact that i don’t think it reads well and i want to be able to write without stressing myself out. additionally, i want to make sure that you all love it, so i’m pushing myself to put out something better.

with that being said, expect some changes to the intro (again), as well as some changes to the characters! i know that i’m changing a lot, but i am an indecisive person, lol.

there won’t be any drastic changes, as most of these changes are to flesh the characters out more, but there is a possibility that i may be adding some new details.

either way, i hope that you all have had a great month so far! i will try my best to push more posts out about foxglove as soon as i can finish them, but other than that i’ll keep you all updated.

thank you for being patient with me as i continue to work on this little project of mine. 🖤

[thedevillionaire]

I think you’ve already gotten most of the writer ask questions so please pick three you’d like to answer again or that you haven’t answered already! -w1ngxd

ahh, thank you for the ask! Alrighty, after some time being an indecisive dumbass, I'm going with:

27 - your favorite part of the writing process

I wasn't asked this one but I like it! My favourite part is a successful completion. I'm an inveterate rereader of my own stuff and now I have the thing. A new thing, even thought it's almost certainly a thing that, in my head, I've known for a long time. But now it's not just a concept, it's an actuality. I made it. It exists now. They exist. And I think I may be in a significant minority for this one, but I really like titling things. I get a silly little rush when I hit upon the perfect title lol.

8 - if you had to write a sequel for a fic, you'd write one for...

Cut time!

I was asked this one already but I kind of had a cheat answer to it, in that one of my fics does have an in-progress sequel, and so I said that one, as the obvious choice. But if I had to write one for a fic that doesn't have one underway? Hmm... Probably Ice Cold Emerald, which I know I'd enjoy writing because it's a Cerberus/Aera heavy-on-the-banter situation, and I always find that pretty easy territory to fall into, and it's a surface light-hearted sort of deal...although with some notably angsty undercurrents. All happens way before Kia's in the picture, though, and it's not really a scene that I think of as a prime snzblr possibility. But maybe that one. I know I'd like it, anyway, haha.

And 17 - talk about your writing and editing process, which I also answered in another ask, but there's also this aspect, which happens, um...kind of a lot. me, writing snzfic: is this ridiculous?

also me: ridiculously hot?

writer me: no…just regular ridiculous.

also me: *makes random noises, wanders about* aaaaaaaAAAA

writer me: shut up. stop it. i'm pretty sure this could be ridiculous.

also me: I AM ON FIRE

writer me: yes but that's you, but the people readi...

also me: INCINERATE

me: (later, rereading) This is stupid and I’m not even turned on.

also me: (later the same day, rereading exactly the same thing) FFFFdfghjkhgrgrkk... *can’t function due to horniness*

[fangirling-heart]

Hi Heart! How's everything going?

For the fic writer ask game, how about maybe ✅️💕🎀 and ⛔️?

Hi there!

Things keep being so and so, since on the one hand I'm not sick anymore, but on the other college keeps kicking my butt relentlessly and I have to restrain myself from yeeting my laptop out the window.

So seriously thanks for this ask! I finally get to talk about writing I actually enjoy! Let's go!

✅ list one or two favorite lines you’ve written and explain why they’re your favorite

Okay, this is tough. A. because (just in case you didn't know) I am a terribly indecisive person and B. because most of my favorite lines I've written are less lines and more speeches.

But one line I really like (that isn't too long to be considered a speech) is this Eda line during a heart to heart scene between her and Hunter in my TOH fic:

"I hurt my family because of my curse. I should feel guilty. But you hurt yours, because he was hurting you and someone you care about. The one who should feel guilty in this situation, is Belos. Not you."

The reason I really like that line is because while trying to offer comfort to Hunter and let him know that Belos was the one in the wrong for hurting him, she also reveals so many things about how she sees herself and her curse (which also sets up a future plot point) and sets a great contrast between her and Belos, who always makes everything that goes wrong in his relationship with Hunter look like it's Hunter's fault and hides behind his curse as an excuse. Something that Eda never does and actually has never left herself move on from.

💕 whats your favorite part of your writing process?

Those days when a scene just flows. When I have such a clear idea of how I want a scene to go, that I basically see it unfold all the while I'm writing, as if I'm watching a show. Bonus points if I'm also listening to a fitting song!

🎀 how do you decide when something is done?

Well, I'm not sure if that something is a chapter or a story as a whole, so I'm doing both.

For a chapter, I'm not sure if I have one specific indication/rule for when it's done. Usually it's when I feel like its main plot points are complete and when there are enough words. Sometimes though, I've had to keep a plot point going, because I couldn't fit it in a single chapter.

As for stories, it's usually because I have planned it from before. (Says the person that has finished just a part one of a story and an one-shot).

⛔️ whats something you try to avoid in your work?

There's several things, but the main one is unnatural dialog. I am certainly not the first writer to complain about it, but sometimes writing dialog can be incredibly hard, especially in simple/everyday scenes, for me at least. Seriously, I can write the most dark, intense angst scenes I can imagine with ease, but for the life of me I can't come up with what a character would say in the simplest, slowest, most normal or fun day without slamming my head on a wall first.

[sunlabyrinth]

1. Who are the other potential love interests in the Empress of Aeser except Markaius? I guess that the female one is Kialee, but who's the other male love interest? If this supposed to be a secret, don't tell!

2. Which characters in the World of Aeser are lgbt+? Tetrine and Tell are bi/pan, Kalavel is attracted to (only?) women, Allie (female mc) and maybe Judy/Felicia are attracted to women... what about other characters?

Kialee is not a romantic interest in Empress, but Kalevel is.

Yeah, I think Kalevel is only attracted to women. I say 'I think' because I don't plan these things. If it feels natural for the character, I go with it. One Tell a Demon ending suggests at least an alliance between Kalevel and a man and maybe something more. However, I can't answer your question about how the other characters are because it may change if it feels right for the character in a different route or context.

I am not very 'commercial minded' in my approach to writing games. I prioritize what seems right within the themes, the characters and what they want, and I aim to be true to the player's choices. So that means I don't prescribe routes like a writer god ("And now! You and you shall smooch at the midpoint whether you like it or not!").

So that means that the answer atm to your other question, is 'probably Julius' because that was what I had envisioned for Empress before I wrote Tell a Demon and introduced Tell as a character. So if Tell and Julius start out with a platonic relationship in Empress, that may mean Julius is a romantic option for Tetrine.

Empress has more of a twisty Noir treatment, esp. later on. So we'll see. A Julius/Tetrine option is most likely a go, but if something works better for the story, I may go with that instead. Hopefully it will be good, if that's the case. (But this is why it's not been officially announced--because there's a small chance it may change). My muse is aggravatingly capricious and historically indecisive. But I'm way better at negotiating my way with it than I used to be. Sometimes I have to trick it into not interfering with my goals so much. (I have this sneaking suspicion it's Markaius pulling the strings. I've had this character around since I was fourteen and he likes all the attention to be on him.)

I kid, I kid. I'm totally in charge here. Not the anthropomorphized font of ideas.