#i am still upset about that
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Nothing makes me feel immediate overpowering resentment and envy like hearing about people who have D&D campaigns that last years. Meanwhile every campaign I've ever done with my friends has choked and died four sessions in due to schedules getting too fucked and tangled to maintain ANY kind of consistent play schedule
#like i know that campaigns that run for years are extremely rare and ultimately a result of relentless determination to keep it alive#especially as adults with full lives and busy schedules#but i'm the only one in my D&D playing friend group with a fully open schedule at all times#because i'm disabled and home bound and literally cannot do anything. so I just end up feeling so fucking shitty about these campaigns dyin#the obvious answer would be for me to DM but I don't want to fucking DM!!!#I want to play my morally dubious characters with no responsibilities involving keeping the plot going beyond my own character roleplay#I have FIVE evil aligned characters sitting around that I've never gotten to play in a session that I KNOW would be so fun to rp as but ALA#not to mention my fd up teenage warlock who did manage to exist in a campaign for several months but the DM overworked themselves and quit#i am still upset about that#besides if I decided to DM a campaign it'd literally never start because I'd get hyperfocused on the minutiae of random encounters#also i already tried to wrangle schedules once before for a raid group in a video game and I am NEVER FUCKING DOING THAT AGAIN#fivertalks.txt
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I'm rewatching Steven Universe and I will never forgive Fandom for what it did to her
#also watching it at age 19-20 as it was released and experiencing the resulting clusterfuck online fandom response was a wild trip#im finally rewatching it again at 25 and really really feel lucky to have seen it at the age i did#i have completely different perspective on it now that i have 3 young nephews and a neice where before i was in college#the music is still as incredible as it was back then#and the animation#i cant beleive people got honestly and truly upset and violently aggressive about characters being off model sometimes#early stevens voice though kills me after awhile...... the yelling .... but his characters growth and development also being reflected in#his voice changing as he grows up#they also go crazy hard on some scenes#who am i kidding the show was a masterpiece and ahead of its time
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I loved Gene and Jean but why did they get a dance scene and more character development than the Hargreeves????
#i am still upset about this#gene and jean#hargreeves siblings#the umbrella academy#tua season 4#luther hargreeves#allison hargreeves#diego hargreeves#five hargreeves#lila hargreeves#ben hargreeves#viktor hargreeves#klaus hargreeves
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2 am rant cuz I can’t sleep:
I’ve stated repeatedly that I’m pro-Palestine and pro-peace, so I obviously want a two sided, negotiated ceasefire and permanent peace for all. I’ve repeatedly stated that I do not condone the degree of heavy bombing taking place in Gaza.
But it’s currently 2:15 in the morning and I am haunted. I’m haunted by the fact that the world saw the brutal attack on Jews and celebrated. I’m haunted by the number of high l-profile celebrities who felt moved to speak out for Palestine — wearing flags and pins and signing demands for Israel to stop bombing, but who said nothing about the dead and tortured and kidnapped Jews.
Yes, what is happening in Palestine is and continues to be a tragedy.
But apparently what happened and is happening to Jews worldwide and Israelis of all religions simply isn’t. At least not enough of one. Not enough of one to move these high-profile folks to speak out for us. Not enough of a tragedy to say the names of the hostages, including one forced to give birth while kidnapped by terrorists. Not enough of a tragedy to condemn the violence happening against Jews. Not enough to speak out on behalf of a 20-year-old singer made to fear for her life because she dared to be from Israel and sing about her own trauma instead of, idk, bursting into flame or shutting up or whatever the mob wanted her to do.
No. What happens to us isn’t a tragedy. It’s a nuisance. It’s a nuisance to have to care about Jews. It gets in the way of everyone else feeling good about their “radical activism” and self-aggrandizing bravery. People of all levels and types of fame. All of whom say they only want peace and an end to pain. Yet when they mention pain, it’s always and only the Palestinian flag. When they want a ceasefire, it’s always an only in reference to Palestine. But they wouldn’t be caught dead asking for an end to Hamas or Hezbollah bombs or even acknowledging that they exist. All calls for peace involve asking Israel to lay down arms but no call for anyone attack Israel, Israelis, or Jews worldwide to do the same.
From large creators to small creators to people in day to day life, non-Jews around the world have made clear that it would be more convenient for them if we Jews just died. If we stopped ever defending ourselves or speaking up or being sad in public.
The vast majority of people speaking out would or will view this post as a justification of violence. But it’s not. It’s a condemnation of complicity from people who claim to care about peace. It is a condemnation of those who claim to be against antisemitism yet refuse to listen when Jews point out how they are contributing to and spreading more antisemitism. People and institutions worldwide have failed Jews everywhere.
Cats Blanchett
Mark Ruffalo
Billie Eilish
Viola Davis
Lena Heady
Susan Sarandon
Ava DuVernay
Hozier
Sara Ramirez
Annie Lennox
Cynthia Nixon
Angelina Jolie
Multiple UN groups and resolutions
College students and professors across the world
Friends I’ve had for 8 years who don’t even respond to messages that I have moved out of state or even spoken to me in at least five months
So many people who are so eager to read every bit of pro-Palestine news that exists and condemn every action from Israel.
And yet…
Before the bombings. Before the reprisals. Before all the violence from Israel: where were they? All these people who so desperately beg for peace (as defined by the end of Israeli aggression only): where were they when it was just dead Jews? Where were the Instagram posts and educational content and in depth analyses of Israeli trauma and history? Where were the condemnations of Hamas? Where were those who are moved to speak for anyone and everyone but Jews?
Are we really supposed to believe any of you actually want peace? When you chant for the globalization of terror tactics that traumatized a generation of Israeli Jews? When you fail to acknowledge Jewish history in any way except to minimize it?
Before the bombing campaign, where were the red carpet statement pins and gowns featuring Jewish stars?
How are we Jews anywhere in the world literally ever supposed to believe that you’re not actively cheering for our deaths? Maybe not in front of our faces, but certainly behind our backs. We know. We know you’re afraid to be less than tactful in front of us, but that you describe our rapes and murders and social exclusion and kidnappings as “unfortunate but necessary.”
I’m reminded of when Israel was first created. At a time where every Jew on earth was traumatized directly because the Holocaust firsthand, Britain left the territory of mandatory Palestine and the UN allowed for the creation of a Jewish state. And then proceeded to heckle the traumatized survivors for handling its creation poorly. The Nakba is a tragedy and an outrage and I’ll never deny that.
But…y’all are no different from the people who stood on the sidelines as Israel was first created. Why was it up to an actively traumatized people who had very recently (and after a continuous 2,000 year period of expulsions and pogroms and murders) been slaughtered on an industrial scale to somehow create a perfect and stable government in a land where people despised them?
The world needs to own up to the fact that everything that ever went wrong in Israel’s creation is a direct result of the continuous and still ongoing contempt for Jews by all the other countries that could have stepped in to help and provide Jews with a guarantee of safety at any time in the last 2,000 years in general but also since 1934 specifically. And you didn’t. Your great grandparents and grandparents and parents all didn’t do jack shit. And you are following in their footsteps. You are all doing just as they did: standing on the sidelines and heckling the Jews you don’t like for fighting back too aggressively.
But what exactly have you or anyone else done to help Jews in your communities or in Israel to not feel like caged animals forced to fight for survival? Like wild beasts you let loose for slaughter in a coliseum for your own enjoyment? At what point have you worked to provide Jews with other options? How have you made the Jews in your life feel safe or seen during this time? How have you started to deconstruct the harmful anti-Jewish bias you inherited from the people you love?
Is it ok that Netanyahu and the Likud government is bombing Palestine to the extent it is currently doing? Of course not. And I’ll never say otherwise.
But aside from yelling “hey stop it!” at Israel or “you’re complicit!” at Jews who fail to join your chanting, what exactly have you done at any point since this started to make the world safer for any of us?
Because from what I can see, the vast majority of you have done nothing. And every Jew I’ve spoken to in the last half a year has seen the exact same nothing.
Too many of you are too concerned with being on the right side of history. Most of you aren’t famous actors or musicians or whatever. Most of you are just people. History won’t remember you individually. Who knows what history will say about the movements of which you were a part? My guess is that you’ll be called passionate and outraged and sympathetic, but ultimately disorganized and misguided.
But you know who will remember you? Every Jew you’ve encountered since 10/7. We will remember each individual we saw who celebrated our death or ghosted us or made us feel unwelcome in our own lives.
We will remember you forever. And not fondly.
#i/p#i/p conflict#antisemitism#leftist antisemitism#choose peace#a ceasefire must involve both sides ceasing to fire#and yeah#I still upset about drawfee tbh#I’m so patient and calm all the time#but I just want everyone to know that this is a choice I am actively making#because all I want to do is scream#Israel#Palestine#grief
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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will
#svsss#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#the fact that people think scum villain#-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me#especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater#heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series#he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters#(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters#like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx#I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes#side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me#i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation#but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years#like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain#the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too#+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu#as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people#another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does#also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be#he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students#and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing#+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this#but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy
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The Ryoko Kui interview's reception is such a disaster over a pretty normal (yet still flawed) interview between a non-Japanese fan and Japanese artistic. This is discourse for discourse's sake, and it's no surprise that almost every Twitter user I've looked at who's using this interview to parade Kui around as a goated mangaka standing strong against Western ideology is anti-trans.
Like, I do think the interview was kinda wonky with its focus on fandom culture, which Kui clearly didn't have much interest in. But sometimes that happens. Sometimes interactions between two people, especially a fan and a creator, two people who view and interact with a piece of media in completely opposite perspectives, don't click. Does this really need to get blown up into a "West vs. East culture war" issue.
Anyways, Kui saying "I don't consider my audience's interpretations when writing. I leave it to their imaginations, but I have my own read on things too" is the healthiest, most normal thing an artist/writer who wants a non-parasocial audience could say. Artists and writers use this line all the time. If Kui didn't enjoy autistic Laius or Farcille headcanons, she would have probably voiced/signalled her discomfort, like she did on the topic of Senshi fanservice. Overall, Kui handled the interview really well. Props to her to sticking to her guns and keeping a healthy disconnect from the fandom. While I think the interviewer could've/should've been more tactful and restrained, the flaws in their questions is not a symptom of the woke mind virus trying to wriggle its way into the pure Japanese psyche. It's the sign of an over-eager fan who sees a piece of fiction differently than its creator.
#personal#delete later#this isn't even worth talking about in depth#but it's crazy that we're rehashing the “artist intent vs fan interpretation” crap again.#read stuart hall's encoding/decoding.#is it so terrible that laius reads to nd people as autistic even though the writer wasn't thinking about it#is that really something to criticize#also you may think the last sentence is me exaggerating but that's literally what the twt discourse is about#anyways i feel bad for the interviewer who's getting harassed over this#i'm seeing every side of discourse be super uncharitable toward them because it's funnier to make them sound outta touch and confrontationa#like. i'm seeing posts from cool people making the interviewer look like they asked “why did you make laius autistic??”#when the actual text of the interview goes “a lot of nd people interpreted laius as autistic. did you have that in mind when writing him?”#and obviously i think a lot of fandom people upset about this are weird too. joking that kui. a real person. is probably autistic is weird#but who am i more willing to criticize. the overeager parasocial fans taking things a too far and making things kinda weird#or the “kill the woke mind virus” weeabo/otaku terfs who still use the r-slur against queer/nd teen anime fans
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Tokyo Disneyland's really going out of their way to spread the absolute, objective truth about the one and only Donald Duck.
Donald is the best at what he does, and what he does is the best. Everyone is here celebrating the Duck of the year!
Even though it rained almost the entire day I visited, the adoration for this number one duck would brighten anyone's day.
So thank you, Donald Duck, for 90 years of being you.
#donald duck#tokyo disneyland#disneyland#three caballeros#the three caballeros#jose carioca#panchito pistoles#disney#i am actually still upset that i never made it to the three caballeros pop-up cafe in shinjuku!#it was made for me! and because the rest of my family could never get their act together. we just never went to shinjuku 😔#but less about the things i missed. let's enjoy celebrating my number one boy's big 90th birthday#find the quacky celebration: donald the legend parade on youtube for the full celebration vibes#because woah-oh we love donald duck! oh-woah-ah-oh the one and only donald duck!
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dropping off some of my unstable universe art because im going insane and we got 3 episodes in like one week?? below is just some sketches i dont feel like finishing but you guys can have them too i guess
#unstable universe#unstableverse#spokeishere#jamatop#ashswag#reddoons#swagdoons#parrotx2#clownpierce#minutetech#mapicc#planetlord#wemmbu#eggchan#devious duo#pride duo#tax duo#so many people oh my godddd#the recent episodes all made me insane in very different ways#spoke's just made me incredibly depressed#minutetech betrayal was crazy#im so upset about it still actually :(#but jamatop is (possibly) back!! that's cool#ash and redd are CRAZYY as villains i love them actually#i fw uu swagdoons#mostly drew them for my friend though (yk who u are hii ^_^)#also i am still not over the clown vs parrot episode probably one of my favorites still#okay ill stop yapping in my tags for now#☆ my art .
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“Regulus would be proud of us,” James whispered quietly to no one in particular, still gripping onto the painting like a life raft.
— Tender Curiosities, Baby! @otrtbs
#tender curiosities baby#art heist baby#james potter fanart#james potter#jegulus#rosekiller#rosekiller fanart#marauders#marauders fanart#evan rosier#barty crouch jr#jegulus fanart#jegulus fanfiction#fic: ahb#art heist baby!#mine#my art#hp#ahb#ive thought about this scene for so long it just took me forever to draw cause once again the anatomy of cars is the bane of my existence#like originally i wanted evan and barty holding hands to be visible to have the contrast of sad lonely james and sad not lonely rosekiller#but alas cars wont allow it#ahb just still has my entire heart you dont get it#i have a none blurry rosekiller and a just james in front of blue with stars version of this but i think ill only put them on insta...#(sneaky end notes: i do have to admit i am not too pleased with evan and barty but this was my first time drawing them)#(so i couldnt figure it out quite yet hency why they look a little. less efforty...)#(also the snake ring is the same design that i drew for chapter 34 of ahb in my little chapter illustrations for my typeset)#((nvm i just checked back and i am fully lying here i used a different one for my typeset and now im vaguely upset oops)#(i shouldnt make decisions only half awake im going to think about this for too long now i am sad))#((like suddenly i was like. hold up. i had a different design there didnt i... it was an open ring goddamnit))
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Trans people should get $100 every time someone misgenders them
#birdgirl ramblings#it’s still happening to me at work#despite the fact that I have a pin#and am very open about me being a trans woman#or the fact that everyone around calls me she/her#I’m just upset is all
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DID YOU GET BATDAD!
not yet, it's just been Oops! All Riddles! over here. 😭 I've hit the point now where I have to decide if I want to keep trying, or if I want to save my remaining keys for future cards. like, on the one hand, I'm not really in the market for another defense SSR right now -- especially a fire-typed one, and especially when I have to be realistic about my chances of getting that third-element attack, you know? but on the other hand, his battle sprite looks like this:
he SURFS AROUND with STITCH how am I supposed to say no to that
on the third hand, I just know that if I blow all my keys on this event, they're going to drop another main story card of, like, Silver going super saiyan or something and I'm going to kick myself so hard I go into orbit.
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with stitch#the woes of f2p#i am very very strict about not letting myself spend money on gacha#(i waste my money on merch instead)#but i can still look at the menu as it were#and the menu for this event is SO cute#i am not upset about getting a bazillion riddles i am happy to watch them hang ten and kick out and...nope i'm out of surfing terms#but i would like a surfing lilia too :(
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I LOVE Teen Stan and Ford, it’s sad they don’t get drawn enough, so thank you so much!
Does Ford ever help Stan when he gets overstimulated? Or maybe when he has a rage response and suddenly starts crying and calls himself stupid?
Here's the other post with Ford
#I am once again asking someone to write me a fic about these two posts. pretty please 🥺#this took me way too long to think off#the dialogue was escaping me#if you can guess what the book he's reading is... you won't win anything I just think it would be cool#maybe Stan got upset about his grades. or a boxing match ir something#sometimes I too bite myself. not deep enough to draw blood but enough to bruise. it's gotten better over the tears but still#now and then...#anywayszzzzzzzz#ask#anonymous#gravity falls#stan pines#stanley pines#stanford pines#ford pines#teen stan#teen ford#art#fanart#traditional art#watercolor#the last few drawings came out so nicely#both of them are emotionally constipated in their teen years (and onwards honestly) so instead of addressing the crying they ignore it#they pretend it never happened#btw here you can see my (successful) attempt at putting Ford out of the picture so I don't have to draw more#comic#long post#look at their socks#I forgot the 's' in 'books' I'm so stupid god
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE PRETTIEST MAN!!!
#Lou Ferrigno Jr#It’s his birthday and honestly as upset as I still am about Thursday he’s still the prettiest man on 9-1-1
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Bow problems (+ other nonsense)
#saroart#dead cells#the beheaded#the collector#they just wanted a nice bow#the collector can do a lot of stuff but i don't think he's good at bows#i was drawing a lot of antagonistic beheaded/collector content so i wanted to do some more cute junk#okay a lot is an exaggeration. still#need some guys being buds content sometimes#weird monster guys doing domestic shit is my favorite genre#i got a bonus at holiday time and im tempted to buy a tablet i can use portably#esp because holy fuck i don't know how to draw anymore#but also i just spent stupid money on tickets to live podcasts so i probably shouldn't#unrelated im very upset today because fucking UPS didn't ring my goddamn doorbell and so “”missed me“” and couldnt deliver my specialty meds#why must i get my meds through ups#because the us is a hellscape and i am beholden to my health insurance company#ups who has literally never managed to get a package to this apartment#tbh im stressed as fuck about having to go through this every goddamn month
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Listen, listen I love Plus Size Lily Evans, glorious headcanon absolutely, however, SOME of you are making her plus size just for the sake of making her insecure, which is odd guys, plus size Lily is like one of my favorite headcanons too, but making her plus size JUST for the sake of making the whole “Lily fell first she just thought James was messing with her” thing work?? Odd, veeery odd
Lily Evans means the world to me and I honestly in my personal opinion hate the “she fell first, he fell harder” trope with jily, let her not like him, let Lily wait till James Potter changes into someone different from the annoying boy that was mean to her best friend, into someone who was kind, let years of James PINING (not harassing her PINING because also the headcanon that he harassed her on the daily is NOT cute) go by before Lily finally agrees to go on a date with him. Let Lily be her own character damn it >:(
Don’t even get me started on making her plus sized just for her PARTNERS to be upset with her body?? That’s just?? Literally all of the ships with Lily, would not care that she’s plus size, you can name any of them and I will back up my point and be right, not even SNAPE would (controversial take I know) care about that, also to add I am not a snily shipper I just can’t imagine young Snape caring all that much about Lily’s weight, still cannot stand older Snape though, I am not a snily shipper at ALLLL. Also, are you telling me you think that JAMES FLEAMONT POTTER wouldn’t WORSHIP the ground Lily walked on?? That’s insane, that man was the most whipped a man could be
Also, name me any other ship with Lily and I assure you they would absolutely also worship the ground she walked on even if she was plus size. James? Already covered. Pandora? Ab-so-lutely head over heels. Dorcas? Idiotic question.
Lily Evans is just THAT girl, let her embrace her body PLEEEEAAASEEE
Anyways, stan plus size Lily Evans for clear skin
#I am talking about them EXCLUSIVELY making her plus size JUST to make her insecure#it’s odd y’all#harry potter#marauders#marauders era#plus size lily evans#again this is about making her plus size JUST to make her insecure#for the sake of making her insecure#OR for the sake of her partners being upset with her weight??? like huh??#pandora would NEVER#nor james#nor dorcas#nor marlene#nor regulus#hopefully at least he was still a death eater and all that#jily#pandalily#dorlily#marylily#jegulily#regulily#marlene x lily#moonflower#BAMF lily evans#ao3 tag usage#screw jkr#I would’ve added that Snape also wouldn’t care about her being plus size and wouldn’t bash her for it but some of you aren’t ready for that#and that’s okay I hate snily too
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i feel like the thing that really gets to me personally about chara undertale specifically is that at the heart of the story, everything is happening because they were just so loved and nobody (except flowey/asriel) knows about why they died.
toriel visits their grave often, and has never really recovered from losing her children. she took their body and carried it all the way back to the ruins. considering monster customs, this is probably the first time she had ever actually buried someone. it’s grim, but it was out of love.
asgore essentially carries out the remainder of their plan, despite never knowing that there was a plan. he declares war on humanity in the name of both of his children. he has golden flowers everywhere, which only started growing after their death.
literally just. everything about flowey. flowey is the core driving force of the plot, and everything he does essentially comes down go being about his trauma and his grief. this should probably be an entirely separate post
AND ALSO the golden flowers are everywhere and so indicative of them and the grief surrounding that. toriel tries to move on, so you don’t really see many in her home but she visits the grave. asgore has them everywhere and when you get to the throne room, its covered. flowey just straight up IS a golden flower.
the other thing that is interesting is that nobody except flowey (and technically alphys) knows why or how they died. and honestly? it does not really matter. knowing wouldn’t change anything. they’re dead either way. asriel had to carry the burden of that knowledge alone, which is another separate post.
but Yes anyways this is getting Long but the point is that it just makes me insane that chara was just so so loved. it didn’t matter that they were troubled or came from a bad situation, it didn’t matter that maybe they “weren’t the greatest person” or anything. they had a place they belonged, they had it really good for a while and they couldn’t handle that but they were very loved and that is the heart and driving force of the story and i
#do i tag this?? i am sure this has been discussed at length and better articulated than my post#oh well#undertale#chara dreemurr#utdr#safe utdr#girl help i am projecting my lifelong greatest wish that i have been upset about every night for like 19 years lmao#(to be loved/have a loving family in which there is a sense of belonging)#undertale analysis#i really do feel like that is why they stuck with me so much and for so long#they get to have something i wanted for a very very long time and technically still do even if it is impossible#man. chara undertale you were everything to everyone
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