#i am not saying zoom is an angel and should be entirely trusted!

[sdwolfpup]

Thank you for including this. I have seen the OP's original apocalyptic warning everywhere and it's such a bald misreading of the actual TOS. They explicitly state that they are not using the video, audio, or chat content of your calls for this. They are not going to record you talking to your family and then make an AI you out of it. AI has a lot of pitfalls but can we PLEASE stop sending people running down wild paths for no reason.

Need a better breakdown? Tiktok attached below that explains Zoom's new Terms of Service:

What about folks who have therapy via Zoom? Court hearings? The list goes on. If you've got any Zoom alternatives, or maybe preference for one of the ones we listed with why, reblog please!

Image Description Below.

[ID: Screenshot of a tweet by Ted Gioia @/tedgioia from 1 day ago. They write, "Zoom terms of service now require you to allow AI to train on ALL your data--audio, facial recognition, private conversations--unconditionally and irrevocably, with no opt out. Don't try to negotiate with our new overlords." Gioia then has as a screenshot attached highlighting different lines from Zoom's new Terms of Services. The text in the image is small but can be read to say:

10.2 Service Generated Data; Consent to Use. Customer Content does not include any telemetry data, product usage data, diagnostic data, and similar content or data that Zoom collects or generates in connection with your or your End Users’ use of the Services or Software (“Service Generated Data”). As between you and Zoom, all right, title, and interest in and to Service Generated Data, and all Proprietary Rights therein, belong to and are retained solely by Zoom. You agree that Zoom compiles and may compile Service Generated Data based on Customer Content and use of the Services and Software. You consent to Zoom’s access, use, collection, creation, modification, distribution, processing, sharing, maintenance, and storage of Service Generated Data for any purpose, to the extent and in the manner permitted under applicable Law, including for the purpose of product and service development, marketing, analytics, quality assurance, machine learning or artificial intelligence (including for the purposes of training and tuning of algorithms and models), training, testing, improvement of the Services, Software, or Zoom’s other products, services, and software, or any combination thereof, and as otherwise provided in this Agreement. In furtherance of the foregoing, if, for any reason, there are any rights in such Service Generated Data which do not accrue to Zoom under this Section 10.2 or as otherwise provided in this Agreement, you hereby unconditionally and irrevocably assign and agree to assign to Zoom on your behalf, and you shall cause your End Users to unconditionally and irrevocably assign and agree to assign to Zoom, all right, title, and interest in and to the Service Generated Data, including all Proprietary Rights relating thereto.

A tweet by John Rogers @/jonrog1 replies, "I ... don't think @/Zoom understands every single TV company and movie studio now has to drop them. Never mind the HIPAA issues. Yikes."

The youth volunteers of Better Future Program @/bfpnola write under these screenshots via Instagram, "We've been talking about this in our Discord server as of last night since we host our meetings in Zoom and we've been researching alternatives, especially ones that are end-to-end encrypted and we know other activists use, like Jitsi, Disroot, Matrix, and ofc Signal. Got any other ones?"

Finally there is an Instagram question sticker asking for Zoom alternatives. /End ID.]

[actual-changeling]

Welcome back to Alex's unhinged meta corner - although today it is less unhinged and more of a watertight analysis.

What I am about to present you is something most people have probably already noticed, but it has been three months and I still lose my mind while going through the final fifteen frame by frame (which is a normal thing normal people like us do, right? right).

You literally cannot convince me my following meta is wrong, and the only person whose criticism I will accept on this post is Michael Sheen and Michael Sheen ONLY. If you're not Michael Sheen (hi Michael Sheen who probably has a secret tumblr account) then your guess is as good as mine, though again, I think mine is solid.

So.

We all love and hate Aziraphale's "I forgive you", but what I find even more painful is the fact that before that he almost said "I love you". Then he stops himself and changes it, and the amount of micro-expressions on his face as he makes that decision is my current cause of death.

Here's the clip as evidence #1, and while it can definitely support itself, let's dive into the pain a little more, shall we?

One important thing I noticed is that Aziraphale doesn't look at Crowley while he stutters his way through his initial reaction. He blinks up at him for a few frames before averting his eyes again and only holds eye contact after the almost-confession (from here on referred to as IL-).

This is Aziraphale holding eye contact with Crowley (left) vs. him looking away (right):

The frame on the left is from the I forgive you (IFY) part of the scene, the other one from right before IL-. If we go through the above clip little by little we will find that he avoids Crowley's face the entire time and his gaze slips further and further down, which I interpret as him overthinking/trying to come up with something to respond to this entire situation.

He is overwhelmed and surprised, caught between his two main desires: Crowley and being a Good Angel.

Combing through the frames, we can actually nail down exactly when Aziraphale first makes eye contact before the IL- and when he stops. Keep the above comparison in mind! The angle is slightly different because his chin is lower and he straightens up throughout the scene.

So! This is where he starts looking at Crowley:

And this is where he stops:

Hard to see? Let's zoom in on his eyes (numbers are the file names):

Now, you might ask me "Alex, this is all fine, although a bit insane, but why is any of this important?"

Because, fellow tumblr user and good omens enthusiast, I think that looking at Crowley is what changes his mind about what to say.

He doesn't look at him -> about to confess his feelings.

He looks at him -> says the absolutely worst possible thing.

Partly to hurt him because they're both lashing out at each other during this argument, but he looks at Crowley, looks at the person that just kissed him, that told him they could have been an us, that wants him and has always wanted him, screw everyone else.

He looks at Crowley and he wants to say l love you but then what? Once he says those words, he can't leave. He just can't.

We have to remember that they have existed within a complicated dance, a game that they have been playing for centuries without ever telling each other what that game actually is, what the rules are - because they couldn't. It was based entirely on trust and knowing the other person well enough to play it safe.

Crowley just flipped the playing board. Nothing is the way it should be, he is refusing to do their dance, refusing to play. He is looking at him and daring him to stop trying to put the pieces back on the board. The only thing neither of them has done yet is actually say I love you out loud.

Saying those words would mean stepping away from the playing board and acknowledging the room they have been playing in. It would mean saying fuck you to heaven, yes, but it would also force Aziraphale to finally define himself outside of the role he has been playing for both Crowley and heaven, and he isn't ready for that yet.

Additionally, there is the fear and/or knowledge (depending on what else the Metatron might have said or done that we did not see) that heaven will retaliate against him and Crowley if he disobeys them now, and he does not want to risk that either.

All that is what, in my opinion, happens in his head when he averts his eyes and interrupts himself. I do kinda what to make a whole different post about his facial expressions leading up to the IFY, so I will end this one with one more bit of pain.

Ready?

Firstly, the face he makes when he makes his decision.

Look at the tight line of his lips, the pain etched into his face, the pure pain in his eyes.

This is the face of someone who knows exactly how badly he is going to hurt Crowley and himself. This is an apology, an I'm sorry for what I'm about to do, this hurts me as much as it hurts you. I'm sorry but I have to.

And then he winces afterwards. I don't know about you, but this is exactly the kind of face I make when I'm emotionally torturing myself with my own thoughts. For the final blow, please look at the picture very, very closely, especially the last frame, because Aziraphale isn't just sorry and he isn't just in pain.

Aziraphale is scared because he knows* that he might lose Crowley over this. He knows that saying I forgive you is (almost) unforgivable. He KNOWS.

He does it anyway because he will lose Crowley either way but he'd rather have him alive and hating him than dead.

With that I am concluding today's unhinged meta corner, thank you for your attention and you're welcome for the pain.

Also: If you want to call me a 'tin hatter' or insane or otherwise make fun of me - this is very much a girl, what were YOU doing at the devil's sacrament moment because you read my meta post all the way to the end. <3

-

*authors note: what Aziraphale thinks he knows and what is actually real is not the same thing but that's a different post

[emmy-writes-sometimes]

The Hoodie Problem

A wardrobe mistake costs you and Henry the privacy of your relationship. 

-

           “No,” you groaned as your heard the dreaded chiming of the Alexa alarm. “No, no, no, turn it off!”

           “You have to say its name, dearie,” a tired Henry grumbled in response. You could feel him pull you tighter, deeper into his warm arms. “Alexa, stop the alarm.” The alarm stopped right after.

           “It’s currently 6:20 AM. The weather in London, England, is currently 6 degrees Celsius and will be sunny for the rest of the day. There are no unread emails for your .edu or gmail.com account. One package, containing 3 makeup brushes and dog treats will be arriving to 102…’

           “Will she shut up?” You groaned in response, turning back into Henry’s warm body. The room was freezing cold, and the dog had already gotten off the bed.

           “I don’t think she’s done yet.” In a single second, the opening riff of Back in Black started playing. “Alright, love, you actually need to go.”

           “No,” you grumbled. “Fuck class, I don’t wanna go to class. I hate it anyway, and I don’t wanna sit there and listen to my history professor talk about an asshole and defend his work when it’s already shit anyway.” Henry chuckled, sending another wave of heat through your body, making you want to stay even more.

           “You won’t get to argue your vulgar point if you’re late.” You sighed and started to sit up, yelling at Alexa to stop playing music. “Go, darling, otherwise I won’t get out of bed either.”

           “You’re such an asshole in the morning,” you responded, wrestling yourself onto the floor. A gigantic ball of fluff followed you, expecting his breakfast. “Can I borrow a hoodie? Left mine in the laundry.”

           “Which you only did so you can borrow one of mine. They should all be clean, just find one that can cover the bruises on your neck.” You sighed, spying a hoodie from a charity Rugby match Henry had done the month before, and after slapping deodorant onto your under-arms you pulled it on over her sports bra. You hoped it would be enough. Quite honestly, you didn’t care who saw the hickies on your neck. Anyone who was going to see was an adult who should act like an adult about it. Your hair would have to do since it wasn’t too greasy, and after deciding just to leave it down, you finished up in Henry’s adjoining bathroom and walked back to the bedroom.

           “Covered?” You asked.

           “Yep. Leave me your keys, take the Merc, and I’ll pick it up from the shop after my workout, I want them to check the paint on the hood, too.” He looked you up and down, sitting up in bed as you walked over to give him a kiss.

           “Thanks, babe.”

           “You look beautiful,” he responded with a smile.

           “I do not.”

           “You do!” Without bothering to look at the back of the sweatshirt, Henry got out of bed and went into the bathroom. You yawned as the massive dog zoomed down the stairs, waiting for breakfast. Kal sniffed around as you set foot on the stair landing, probably wondering why your vanilla perfume was mixed with the scent of Henry’s strong aftershave. Truth be told, you were glad. It was a comforting smell.

           “Be a good boy, Kal, Papa’s gonna feed you in a minute.” The dog panted in excitement and went to go stand by his water bowl, where he would inevitably drool for the rest of the time until Henry came to feed him. You placed your things from the dining room table, your makeshift desk, into your backpack, refilled your water bottle, and took a few seconds to exchange your keys with Henry’s keys. With another glance around the house, making sure you didn’t leave any chargers behind, you walked out the front door and began to adjust Henry’s car to fit your height. You felt like something was off, but you couldn’t describe it. Instead you went to go get your coffee and find a place to park before your frightfully early class.

           “You look knackered,” a voice said behind you as you finally climbed out of the car an hour and a half later. It wasn’t the first time you’d borrowed one of Henry’s cars, but at least it was the humblest of the three he had. The McLaren wasn’t something he even trusted himself to drive sometimes, he’d finally gotten rid of the Clio collecting dust at his parents’ house, and the Aston was his precious baby you didn’t dare go near. But you were endlessly grateful he let you borrow the Merc. You just wished it wasn’t so flashy. It was ten times flashier than the seven-year-old Hyundai you’d inherited from your mother. Especially in the parking spot right in front of the building ten minutes before class where people could see you getting out of it. The voice who’d spoken was Anna, your best friend, and supposed roommate if you ever came home.

           “Trust me when I say that man needs a new coffee machine, because I’m sick of having to leave the house at seven in the morning to go buy some,” you groaned in response, swinging your backpack over your shoulder. It was heavy as hell, but you were carrying most of your things in it because you didn’t have time to go back to your barely lived-in dorm room. Your other hand held your gigantic coffee, the biggest one you could buy because apparently British people preferred caffeine-free tea in the morning. People called you absolutely crazy for getting cold drinks when it was cold outside, too, but you didn’t care.

           “You realize your neck is completely purple, right? I doubt an espresso machine is the reason you’re so tied.” You scoffed at Anna’s statement. In reality it hadn’t been crazy sex keeping you up for the past few nights – you’d been working so late that Henry came up to you the night before and wouldn’t stop biting at your neck until you agreed to come to bed, hoping it would embarrass you into having better sleeping habits. But sex was a much better story.  

           “Is it really bad?” You asked.

           “No. Not from the front.” Anna started walking backwards up the building’s staircase, opening the door for the two of you. Your classroom was the first one on the left, a massive auditorium, because everyone had to take the History of Wagnerian Opera class for some stupid reason. You took your normal places in the bright room, taking your laptops out onto the desks. You fully expected to have to plug it in, but Henry, the ever helpful boyfriend, had plugged it in when he found it half dead the night before.

           “Had a rough night, did you, Yankee?” Another voice asked behind you. It was Isaac, another student you’d been friends with from the moment you stepped on campus.

           “What on Earth gave you that idea?” You asked as you took a sip of coffee. Isaac leaned closer, looking down at the back of the sweatshirt you were wearing. The hood barely covered the top of the lettering on your back. It read Cavill in white letters, and underneath it was the number 01. It was obviously customized, and well-loved judging by the fading English rose that was the logo for Henry’s favorite team. It was about three sizes too large, too, adding to the evidence that the hoodie didn’t belong to you. Isaac and Anna knew you were dating Henry, but most people had no idea. It wasn’t like you were hiding it, because you weren’t. Henry just wanted to protect you from the craziness that came with dating him, including paparazzi and prying eyes that would try to find their way into every little thing you did with or without him. You hadn’t signed an NDA or anything, but Henry was insistent on protecting you for as long as he could. You were fourteen years younger than him and he loved you dearly and nothing could change that.

           “You do realize that the back of your hoodie says HIS name on it, don’t you?” Isaac said quietly, hoping no one else in the auditorium heard.

           “What?” You asked in response. You could feel your face going red.

           “It says Cavill 01.”

           “Oh, shit.” You couldn’t take it off because the only thing you were wearing underneath it was a thin sports bra, and of course Henry’s car was so spotless on the inside that there was no chance of there being an extra shirt in there. Come to think of it, he’d been lounging around in the sweatshirt the night before. Shit, you thought. How could you miss it? How could you screw up that badly? What if this ruined everything?

           “Oh shit is right,” Anna remarked.

           “Does my hair cover it?” Isaac looked down at your hair. The lecture was about to start, but the thought of maybe losing Henry over a hoodie made you want to sit in the corner and cry.    

           “No. Neither does the hood.” You sank lower into the seat.

           “Maybe people won’t care. Cavill’s a common last name here.”

           “No, not really. And I think they will.” You sighed, crossing your arms against your chest.

           “Just don’t mention it to anybody and wear your bag when you can. Problem solved.”

           “I’ll get you something else later,” Anna cut in. In reality everyone already knew something was up. You had mentioned a few times, offhand, that you had almost moved into your boyfriend’s house and was commuting from Kensington. And you mentioned one day that he was an actor, much less that he was one of the most well-known actors in the entire world. Your phone had his name as Hank, and even though the connection wasn’t immediate, it was still enough to make someone think of the name Henry. Damn the British and their overly common name diminutives.

           “I swear to God, I’ll strangle whoever even thinks about it,” you sighed in response, putting your head down until the professor started class. You didn’t need to take notes quite yet, and pulled up the messages between you and Henry. The last night it was just on my way, got the food! And you are an absolute angel. Drive safe. His name wasn’t completely revealed at the conversation.

           We have a problem. Henry started typing immediately.

           You didn’t crash the car, did you????

           No, but that probably would’ve been better…

           Please explain.

           Promise you won’t get mad?

           What’s wrong???

           I picked up your hoodie from last night and it has your name on the back and it hides my neck but it has your name on it and there’s nothing under it so I can’t take it off and I’m freaking out because you don’t want people to know and I’m sorry, I just screwed up so bad. I’m such an idiot.

           It’s okay. Calm down. You’re not an idiot. You’re an absolute moron and I love you anyway

           I’m so sorry. I know you didn’t want anyone to know.

           The only reason I didn’t want anyone to know is because I didn’t want anyone to make you upset because I’m stupidly in love with you and people will try to tell you otherwise. It’ll be okay. If they find out they find out. Don’t worry about it. Really.

           I feel like an idiot now.

           I’m sure you look better in it than I do anyway. Don’t worry about it, love. I’ll see you at home and we’ll figure it out.

           Thank you.

           I love you!!!!

           Love you more dimples.

           You smiled a little, sitting back into your chair and starting to type out notes about the dark undertones within Ride of the Valkyrie. For the rest of class, it was fine. But you couldn’t lie and say you weren’t nervous for your next class. Isaac wasn’t there to back you up, and Anna sat on the other side of the room because you always distracted each other. You were on your own, taking in the scent of Henry’s aftershave that was left on the sweatshirt from the night before. It helped you calm down at least a little, even if the name on the back made you nervous. You sat lower in the chair than usual, but it didn’t stop at least one person knowing.

           “You like Henry Cavill too?” Elizabeth, the most annoying person on Earth (and a completely mediocre pianist with no sense of emotion who only got in because her father works for the royal family), said as she strained to read the sweatshirt on the way to her seat.

           “Yep.” You tried to play it off and wipe out the conversation before it even started. Never before had you wanted to listen to your old white professor rant about other old dead white guys. “He’s a good actor.”

           “I’m, like, so in love with him,” Elizabeth responded. Henry rolled his eyes every single time you said a word about Elizabeth, but you’d never tell her that. “Like, he’s just so dreamy.”

           “Oh, yeah,” you responded without even thinking. “He’s gorgeous.” You didn’t even realize what you said until Elizabeth’s eyes danced with a grin that matched her mouth.

           “You know him?” She exclaimed.

           “I mean, um, yeah, my internship…” you tried to cover, but it definitely didn’t work.

           “Shut up, you know him? Or, oh my gosh, is he the guy you’re dating?” You could tell that all of the color drained from your face and the room suddenly felt hot. You weren’t going to lie about it, but she would also be one of the first few people to know. And it wouldn’t be long before she blabbed her mouth to her followers.

           “I heard he likes younger girls anyway,” Ellen, the girl who sat behind Elizabeth, said. That was the cue for you to realize that everyone else was listening, too, and they couldn’t just mind their business. Your hands shifted uncomfortably inside the pocket of Henry’s sweatshirt. The room was definitely getting warmer.

           “Yeah,” you responded quietly. “We’ve been dating a few months and didn’t want to tell anyone yet. But you figured it out, so congrats.” You swallowed a lump in your throat. On the one hand you were glad that it wasn’t going to be a secret anymore. You didn’t want to hide how much you loved the curly-haired idiot who was too large for his own good.

           “Oh my GOD!” Elizabeth said excitedly. She was a little too loud with it. You just turned back around and pulled out your phone, hands shaking from the anxiety of what Henry had said. He said you were good enough, but what happened when the world was able to judge you?

           Well, Elizabeth figured it out. Not long until she spills to her 22 followers. And then their 22 followers.

           At least I can post that picture you took with me on the beach…

           The ugly one where I almost drowned after? Nooooo please!!!

           Oh that’s not what I was thinking about, but now that you mention it, my fingers might just slip…

           This conversation is DONE, fat Cavill! I swear I’ll punch the dimples right out of you.

           You underestimate me, little one.

           Cavill, this class is an hour long and I swear if I get out and you did something I will make you sleep on your own couch for the next year.

           Guess you’ll just have to fight me when you get home…

           With that, the conversation was over. Most people in the room didn’t seem to notice or care, but Elizabeth and Ellie did. Your friends didn’t for the most part, but you would assume some would turn on you. And you could tell that they were going to do whatever they could to make sure everyone knew that they knew before anyone else. It was strange to think that Henry was being so cool with it, that he wanted there to be a before people knew and an after. You shut your mind off and did your best to focus, even though it wasn’t very well.

           You got up at the end of class and packed your things, ready to brave the library until your next class, but you exited the room and there was someone standing at the entry hallway. Henry. And he was holding another coffee in one hand, and draped on his other arm was a shirt. He’d never been in public with you without some stupid disguise on, much less to bring you coffee in between classes.

           “Henry?” You asked, slightly too loudly. Elizabeth and Ellen turned toward you, but you blew past them to see Henry. He was grinning, from ear to ear.

           “So apparently, according to the internet in the past few minutes I’ve been in the car, I’m cradle robbing. Apparently you’re Instagram-model material, which I could’ve told you,” he said. “I brought you another coffee for dealing with bullshit, and I brought you another shirt in case you want to change.”

           “Can I keep this one?” You asked, looking down at Henry’s that you were still wearing. “And you didn’t post the bad picture of me yet?”

           “No, I was waiting for your approval,” he responded. He reached for his phone and handed it to you, and it was opened to a set of pictures he hadn’t posted yet.

           @henrycavill: The real Mission Impossible is getting her to stay still long enough to take a picture with her favorite old man. To be clear, though; she is MINE and I couldn’t be happier. I will sword-fight ANYONE to defend her honor!!

           It was a series of five pictures, all of them the two of you together, some of them cuter than others, and you just grinned. You couldn’t believe he was okay with everything, and you couldn’t believe that he was actually standing there with you, braving the people in your class just to hand you a coffee and offer you a shirt.

           “I love you,” you said quietly. He smiled in response. “Really.”

           “I love you too. I don’t care who knows.” You laughed and hugged him tightly, even though he was still holding your coffee. “But I do want the Merc back, your car is outside.”

           “Whatever you say, cradle-robber.”

A/N: I’m in an opera history class right now and it’s so frustrating that I’m definitely taking it out here. I hope the person who requests this loves it as much as I did because omg I love this 😭

[silverinia]

I came for Baranski, I stayed for Baranski - a quick Christmas On The Square review someone* actually asked for

(* thank you, anon)

Disclaimer: I am in no way a professional of any sorts when it comes to film and I'm not a journalist either. The last movie review I've written was probably for a school assignment in eighth grade. I didn't do research for this and I've watched the movie exactly one time, so this is just for fun.

It was a Sunday, Sunday the 22nd of November, nearing the end of the train wreck of a year that is 2020. I woke up on an air mattress around seven am, my head aching, my throat itching with pyrosis and light nausea, it was still dark outside behind the closed blinds in front of the windows, when I slowly realised where I was, one of my best girlfriends sleeping next to me in her bed. I had crashed at her place after a warm, fuzzy evening of mulled wine, tacky Christmas movies I would never watch alone (Christmas Chronicles and Holiday Calendar, which I quite honestly didn't enjoy at all, but the company made it fun anyway), doing our nails, wearing the fun kind of face masks for a change and smoking too many cigarettes, as the soft pain in my head informed me right now. She woke up an hour later and the morning went by with coffee and reheated pizza for breakfast, when we decided to watch another movie and I realised that it was THE Sunday I'd been waiting for through Zoom interviews and Dolly Parton twitter memes and the infamous wig gate that will be briefly discussed in the following, and so we clicked on the small icon in the Netflix menu that said "Christmas On The Square".

And oh boy, was it a ride.

To start off, I should mention that I have a hard time watching most modern day American Christmas movies, as I noticed quite vividly again when I watched the two aforementioned Netflix productions last night. The character development is always foreseeable to say the least, the plot lines are plain clichés hunting each other like they're the kids in The Hunger Games, and the writing is generally so bad that you can join the actors in reciting the entire scripts on your first watch. I watch How the Grinch Stole Christmas once a year while I'm gift wrapping and pause every fifteen minutes to shamelessly stare at forties Christine Baranski (I think we should all turn away from the birth of Jesus and instead count our years based on Christine Baranski's date of birth) in flamboyant nightgowns and short Christmas themed dresses, looking so fabulous that every interpreter of Santa Baby ever could only dream of it, I watch Love Actually at least five times a year to lust over Hugh Grant, cry with Emma Thompson and miss Alan Rickman, I enjoy Bridget Jones, which I would definitely consider a Christmas movie, and that's it. That's my yearly Christmas time entertainment routine and I can barely tolerate anything beyond, because I'm still traumatised from the time when I was around five years old and on a holiday family visit where had to sit through National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, the dumbest movie I have ever seen (my apologies if you like it but also, who hurt you?), with my cousins. I hated it. I hated every minute of it. And it scarred me for life.

But this was a Christine Baranski movie, I knew she was going to play the lead and so I was pretty much as excited about this as I could. And the fact that Dolly Parton wrote the whole thing didn't hurt either. As I said earlier to my friend I was watching it with, I have the pop cultural taste of a fifty year old gay man, a quality I am most proud of, and this simply ticked off all my boxes.

I expected something similar to a Mamma Mia experience that wouldn't cause me to crave packing my bags, give Covid the finger and run off to Greece. Light-hearted entertainment, easy to stomach, uplifting music and so little plot that the simplicity feels like a creative choice. That's what my pained, hungover brain knew it could cope with and that's not what I got.

The movie started and I was immediately in the zone. I saw Christine Baranski's name in the front credits (an experience that never fails to make me scream "Yass Queen" at the screen, regardless of where I am and who I'm with, as if I'm the sobering result that pops out of the package when you order Jonathan Van Ness on Wish), the setting was wonderfully corny (I grew up watching Gilmore Girls once a week, so give me warm fairy lights and a gazebo and I'm perfectly happy) and as my friend wondered whether Dolly Parton, in her exaggerated homeless attire that didn't make her look shabby at all, was green-screened into the setting because she stood out so much (which she was because the background dancers were dancing in slow motion, but to be fair, we were probably still a little too drunk to notice that from the start) and I told her I thought that it was just the natural glow someone who's Dolly Parton simply carries with them everywhere they go, I was happy. This was the movie I was prepared for. A movie in which the most problematic thing would be stereotypical characters and the wig they hid Christine's real, flawlessly handmade by God herself hair under.

And then, around five minutes in, Christine Baranski's childhood love interest was revealed as she pressed her perfect pointy nose against the window of his shop and sang about her unrequited love.

And suddenly, things started taking turns at a pace I was still way too sleep-deprived for.

Suddenly, in the middle of my general amazement at seeing Christine Baranski do literally anything and laughing loud at her impeccable comedic delivery, there were unresolved daddy issues, hanging prominently at the wall in her marvellously designed house (she literally says "Daddy" at one point and I couldn't help but think that only someone with her vocal skills could keep from making it sound cringe-worthily kinky). One moment, I was clutching my chest above my heart while she was bonding with little bartender Violet and munching on pretzels while downing some whiskey in that elegant way only Christine Baranski can bond with ten year olds who had it rough, eat pretzels and down whiskey, and the next she felt responsible for said girl's mother's death (which she kinda was too, but I'm not the boss of her). I was still busy making fun of how the very annoyingly, but when you're snacking on pizza with extra cheese at nine in the morning also highly funny, slow talking pastor's name was Christian, and suddenly there was a cancer scare.

It was a lot, a hasty sprint from major issue to major issue with a hint of comedic relief every now and then, and it didn't get any less until the very, rather poorly resolved, end.

The entire, constant up and down was followed by the movie's peak of suspense, the near death of precious Violet, something I couldn't even get too invested in because I was still so busy worrying about Christine's MRT results (I was truly fucking worried), not to mention that I hadn't even started to really process the sudden revelation of the love child and how it had affected her character's actions until this point. Was her constant tendency of pushing people away, as we've seen most clearly with her angel in training assistant who's name I cannot recall right now, the result of her broken trust in her father who practically ripped her son away from her after she had just given birth to him? Was it a result of her never getting the closure she needed with plaid flannel wearing Carl she was clearly still in love with? Maybe both? And what of the many issues was it that made her so incredibly shaken up when Violet blamed herself for her mother's death? Was it 'just' due to the fact that the closed pharmacy was on her, or was there more to it? Was it because she had grown up without a mother herself? Or did I miss a major piece of information because I was momentarily distracted, dumbfoundedly staring at Christine's very blue eyes? No time to ponder on that, little Silverinia, because here comes unconscious Violet in an ambulance, WEE WOO WEE WOO WEE WOO!

I'm not going to go in depth about what plot lines I thought were especially carelessly handled and why, real standouts were the sudden forgiveness towards her father who had still acted like a shitty asshole even though he might have had his reasons, because giving the baby up for adoption just wasn't his choice to make, and the fact that I kind of didn't buy how quickly Regina managed to forgive herself, especially for Violet's mother's passing, considering how deeply her tall, slim, dare I say angelic and entrancing figure was buried beneath the weight of all her issues. It felt rushed and incomplete, but that's as detailed as it gets because my major point is something else.

I think this movie made the great mistake of trying to be more than your average, flat, happy ending Christmas movie. I think no one involved thought it was possible to make it a big hit if the only real plot would've been great Dolly Parton music, fun ensemble dance choreographies, Christine Baranski's outstanding acting skills, fun settings and costumes and a redemption arch with as little plot as it could possibly take to make Christine likable to those who aren't already lost forever in the rabbit hole of being obsessed with her (poor fuckers, can't relate). They didn't notice that with the legends that were involved, they could've easily gone the Mamma Mia way. And I think that's why they tried to include heavier plot lines than most creators would've chosen, experiencing loss at an early age, struggling to find closure, dealing with sickness, teenage pregnancy, parents forcing their choices on their children when they affect their childrens' lives first, adoption, and the fear of losing your kid.

It was a lot and I don't want to say that it didn't work because my friend was crying, like, pretty hard and I questioned my entire existence all through the movie in not the worst way, and I did enjoy it a lot while watching. The "grief is love with nowhere to go" line was a real standout, for example, where the attempt of complexity DID work. It positively gave me fleabag season two, "I don't know what to do with it now, with all the love I have for her." - "I'll take it. It sounds lovely. You have to give it to me." feels, and that's about the biggest praise I can come up with. BUT (and this is written in capital letters because it's the big but) I'm also totally convinced that I wouldn't have enjoyed it if they hadn't cast Christine Baranski for the lead role. In my humble opinion, the hasty, not really at all resolved plot of this movie only worked because Christine Baranski is just a fantastic actress. She quirks a mocking eyebrow and you laugh. She parts her perfectly painted red lips and you immediately hang on them because you don't want to miss a single breath she, a literal goddess, graces us mere peasants of people with. She smiles and you're happy. She laughs and even while she's still laughing, you can't wait to hear her do it again. Her eyes fill with tears and you feel goosebumps on your arms, her voice slightly trembles, a breath hitches in her throat and you feel your heart shattering to pieces. As Chuck Lorre once said, this woman could read you the phone book and you would end up laughing tears because she just gets the job done. She knows what she's doing, she's an absolute pro in her game, and it doesn't matter, not even a little bit, what she's working with, because the work she eventually delivers with it is always at a minimum of 200%. I forced my friend to watch this movie with me because I adore this woman, and I felt for this movie because I felt for her. It wasn't the plot that sadly brutally overestimated itself, it wasn't the songs that I obviously enjoyed, nor the comedic elements that truly made me laugh a lot, it was all her. I came for Baranski, and I stayed for Baranski. This woman can do anything. She can even look graceful in a terrible wig job.

(side note / unpopular opinion: I actually didn't think the wig was all too bad. It wasn't good, actually far from good, but for me, nothing can match the awful wig game of Mamma Mia 2. I loathed that wig, I absolutely cannot stand it. So this didn't feel all that terrible. It definitely wasn't the most problematic part about the movie.)

I enjoyed watching this. It was a nice distraction from all the bullshit in the world. Watching it today was the first thing this year that actually brought me something close to excitement about the holiday season, even though everything will be very different and probably not quite as jolly this year. But it just gave me good vibes and as someone who did not watch this as a film reviewer, that's the biggest part of what leads me to enjoy a movie.

Will I watch this again? For sure. Will I enjoy it when I'm not hungover, having freshly done nails and munching delicious pizza for breakfast? Probably not as much, but it'll still have Christine Baranski in it. Would I recommend watching this? If you share my obsession with Queen B, one hundo. If you don't, probably not.

[1stunseeliefaelass]

"I was elected to lead, not to read. Number 3!" -From Simpson's Movie

Mini Stories - Tracing the Written Word

Azrael never could help but note the visitors of the library in which he watched over. Alongside his duties to watch the Well of Souls anyway. Today was no different, as a repeat visitor had returned once again. Her white rabbit ears sticking out among the visitors who could only walk into the library. Azrael quickly flew down, figuring she'd need assistance as per usual. He had a surprise for her anyway, so better to greet her before duty called him elsewhere.

"Welcome back Ale, I trust you found your way alright."

Ale scratched her head, "I believe so if I'm here. But thank you for checking in nonetheless."

"I've managed to acquire something you may find useful. It's a recent addition to the library and took some time to get through the routine checks and such, but I did what I could."

"Oh my. I hope you haven't gotten into any trouble for my sake." Ale replied in concern.

"Oh none at all, you needn't worry. While some books, parchments, scrolls, and the like do have to go through a process before being added in, it's worth it. Especially when finding something I believe deserves to be here. I am the main authority of the Spire at the end of the day after all." Azrael explained.

Ale nodded, "Of course. Just making sure my friend. So what is it you've found?"

Azrael flew back and told her, "I'll retrieve it. Permit me a moment."

Ale waited patiently for a time before hearing a metallic sound land nearby. She would've suspected Abaddon, if not for the sound being too light. Then she heard a female voice that confirmed her suspicions.

"I am Uriel of the Hellguard, and I have been charged with watching over you."

"Oh? Well I suppose I don't mind the extra company then. I'm assuming Abaddon is as paranoid as per usual?" Ale inquired.

Uriel was surprised by the tone she recieved. Usually when asked to observe someone of interest for Abaddon she'd either face hostility or annoyance. Ale did neither, rather she seemed complacent and understanding.

"Well this is...certainly a first for me."

"Yes I can imagine blindness is uncommon for Angels, due to your healers and the miracles I hear about." Ale replies simply.

"Well yes....I've never dealt with anyone who is blind. But that isn't what I meant. I meant that you're the first person that didn't get angry or annoyed with me doing my job."

Ale turned her head finally, her face surprising the Angel all the more. It was a soft, kind looking face with a feeling of nostalgia mixed in. The vines surprised her more, as they wiggled about and seemed to be watching her as she watched Ale. "Very few people are understanding of a warrior's life anymore. Especially when so many races try not to involve themselves in conflict. But rest assured, though my clan is considered the 'pacifists' of the Lepus clans, I can understand the duties of a soldier. As well as sympathize with their hardships. I'll hold no ill will, and why should I? Especially when you're already doing a decent job watching me."

Uriel's eyes widened before her face hardened again, "Well thank you. It's actually nice to hear that for a change. But enough idle chat for now, I have a job to continue."

"Alright then, if you have further questions or simply wish to talk out of boredom later, be my guest. I do not mind."

Uriel nodded as Ale turned back around in time for Azrael to return. He held a book in his hands and regarded Uriel kindly, "Greetings Uriel, Abaddon send you I take it?"

"He did Azrael, I am to watch over this woman here." Uriel responded with conviction.

"I see. Well you'll find Ale is far from combative, and that's she likely one of the most patient people you'll meet. Either way to business, here's what I found for you Ale." Azrael stated as he put the book down on the table in front of Ale. Ale opened it in excitement and waited for Azrael to begin reading for her. Only for him to place her hand on the first page.

Ale's eyes widened as she felt the braille on it, "You found a book with a braille?"

"I did indeed, and I am glad you are happy with it. Hopefully it's full of helpful information for you as well. I was told it had knowledge for wind mages, among a few other things."

"I'm sure I'll enjoy it either way, thank you Azrael."

Azrael bowed his head slowly before his attention was caught by one of his subordinates, "Ah duty calls of course. I shall return when I can Ale. Good reading to you."

"Of course. Farewell for now." Ale told him as he flew off. Uriel in the meanwhile observed the small bumps on the paper with confusion. They didn't seem to look like words, and yet Ale was reading it as if there were words written down. The vines noted her confusion and informed Ale, who glanced her way again, "Need something?"

Uriel looked at her with alertness before saying, "Not really no. Just wondering how you are reading without words."

"Oh, well there are words I assure you. That's what these bumps are. Each set of bumps represents certain letters."

"How can that be? They don't look like any letters I know, not English or Angelic letters."

Ale giggled softly, "I know they don't look like it, but they are in fact representative of letters. It is slower to read as a result, but nothing I've done before. I just hope I'm not too terribly rusty with this."

Uriel couldn't help but notice just how fast Ale's finger glided across the bumps, with only the occasional pause here or there. Eventually though Azrael did in fact return, and Ale had pretty much zoomed through the entire first half in one sitting. Uriel found it impress to be sure, but still believed Azrael could read much faster. Then again, he wasn't blind and in need of braille.

Ale took a break at that point and thanked Azrael for finding the book again before looking at Uriel, "And thank you for a job well done. I enjoyed our talks, as brief as they were. Perhaps next time we meet we'll have longer chats."

Uriel bowed, her sword in front of her, "If such a day comes where I am to watch over you again, I shall look forward to it."

With that Ale bowed a little herself and walked away to head home. Uriel then headed back to Abaddon to give her report. For once, she actually had a good day watching someone.

[chibimyumi]

That Demon, Seducer

Dear @gisellehexen89,

First of all, thank you for your kind words and interesting ask!

Indeed, the musical version of this scene is quite different from its 2D counterparts for several reasons. The shortest comparison I can make is that the musical version is, as you say, more unsettling, whereas the 2D counterparts are creepier.

But! I think nobody ever sends me asks because they think I’m good at short answers (if you did, I hope y’all learned by now that I just am not XD), so here comes another loooong post to live up to my notorious reputation!

This post will be a three-parter:

Manga and Anime

Musical - Noah’s Ark Circus 2.1. Step 1. Listening 2.2. Step 2. Connecting 2.3. Step 3. Advance

Conclusion

1. Manga and Anime

In order to understand the difference, let us first look at the manga and anime before we compare it to the musical.

In chapter 28 Beast is very upset. Sebas sneaks up on her, and the first thing he does is touch her scarf. Beast is understandably enraged at Sebastian’s assumptions of her feelings despite not even having had a proper conversation yet. “What do you understand!?” she challenges, and Sebas makes a countermove: “nothing, yet,” basically announcing that he is going to pry Beast open.

When Beast fights back, the demon immediately grabs her by the wrist and arm, pulling her closer.

Sebas gives her no time at all to consent, and already puts a hand to her belly, moving upwards presumably past her breasts before grabbing her by the most vulnerable part of any animal, the throat. Hereby, Sebas has demonstrated to Beast how the power-balance is entirely on his side, leaving her entirely at his mercy.

Sebas’ anime counterpart takes it even further. We see how Beast tries to run in episode 6, but Sebastian uses the fence to his advantage, blocking Beast’s body between the metal and his own body.

Beast attempts to fight Sebas off, and just like in the manga, Sebas yanks her arm to stop her escape. Anime!Beast offers more resistance than in the manga, and Anime!Sebas also responds with greater aggression. Here we see him not only grab her arm, but also seemingly pulling it behind her body, almost like how a police officer arrests a suspect.

The camera starts low and tilts upward in a suggestive metaphor of ‘moving up her skirt’. Sebastian’s hand does more than just holding Beast in place, he is touching up on her.

More explicitly thanks to the animation, we also see how Sebas is caressing Beast’s skin while she wears an expression of terror on her face. Just like in the original, Anime!Sebas also dramatically banks the power balance to his side.

Touching Beast’s scarf may not seem much of a deal on surface level, but this scarf was wrapped around her by Joker. And judging from how Beast immediately pressed her face into it, the scarf symbolises some type of comfort to her.

By touching that scarf unsolicited, Sebas was making an uncalled move on Beast’s last comfort.

In the manga, this assault on Beast’s metaphorical comfort was taken to yet higher levels by showing us how the scarf drops to the ground. Here, Beast’s comfort was metaphorically undone, literally leaving her exposed to Sebastian’s advances.

2. Musical - Noah’s Ark Circus

Now we have studied Sebastian’s advances in the manga and anime, it is time to move on to the musical.

First of all, the setup of this scene is incredibly different and therefore also calls for different approaches from the performers. This scene in the musical can be split into three parts.

Step 1. Listening

In the manga and anime it is mostly Sebas who does the talking, making advance after advance. In the musical however, most lines were given to Beast, while Sebas is the listener and only speaks in response.

In my opinion, this choice is by far the most clever change, because Beast would naturally not be interested in Sebastian’s rambles; all she wanted was to be heard. Sebastian’s goal in turn, was also to win trust and information from Beast.

I very much doubt anyone would open up to someone who imposes himself onto them the way anime and manga Sebas did. Had the target been someone who’s already horny beyond reason, seeing such an attractive seducer MIGHT have been enough, but that was not Beast’s situation. She was already emotionally vulnerable, and therefore I suspect what manga and anime Sebas did would only cause someone to shut close even further.

In the musical version, Beast starts her emotional pour-out, stating: “no one could ever understand my pain.” Yunbastian’s lines differ from the manga: instead of shutting Beast down with the line “I don’t understand anything, yet,” he actually accepts the woman’s words, and simply replies: “shall I wipe away your tears?” in the softest, cooing voice ever leaving his lips.

Beast does not humour Sebastian’s offer with a reply, and instead continues to pour out her frustrations and pain. Sebas continues to listen silently until Beast says that she’ll “only get hurt,” to which he replies: “I shall help you forget.”

In stark contrast with his manga and anime counterparts, the first time Sebastian touches Beast, it was in a gentle, assuring manner, only touching her shoulder as a sign of support.

Step 2. Connecting

Beast’s singing becomes more frantic, and she turns to face Sebastian. As it turns out, Sebastian had been listening so well that the moment she faces him, she hears him say the very words that she had been building up to: “a one time liberation.” There. The ‘understanding’ she previously believed the man incapable of giving. Their minds connected.

Yunbastian backs away to give her space, indicating that all he does is make the offer, but that Beast is the one who has the say in whether she grabs this ‘liberation’.

Now that Beast knows that she is being respected, she literally and figuratively moves towards Sebastian.

Even with full confidence that his prey is now in his hands, Yunbastian still does not touch Beast’s body, fully respecting her autonomy. Yunbastian merely follows Beast’s steps, never interrupting her. This was a very important action, because Sebastian needed Beast to feel like she can talk to him; “talking to him”, after all, was exactly what he wanted her to do.

Here ⇊ is a zoomed-in, slow-motion capture of this ⇈ moment where Yunbastian shows the audience how he knows he’s been successful in luring in his prey. His eyes communicate very clearly his inner thoughts: “hook, line, and sinker.”

Beast and Sebastian’s dance duet begins, and we see Beast being the one to make the first move while Sebastian follows. This too is a very important nuance, because by following Beast instead of making her comply with him, Sebas shows her that SHE is the one who matters here, that SHE is the protagonist of their story.

Step 3. Advance

For the first time Yunbastian makes his advance. Here he also follows Beast in her movements. He does not take Beast, but gently guides her hand into his.

Once Beast grabs hold of Yunbastian’s hand, the music plays up and they engage in a synchronised dance. Still here, Yunbastian only touches the hand and arm Beast had given him herself.

Then suddenly, Beast seems to think better of it, and attempts to walk away. Alas, it is too late, Sebastian’s already got her.

Unlike in the manga or anime, this is the first time Yunbastian touches Beast’s scarf - her symbolic comfort. He does not try to undo the scarf or pry away the fabric to touch her skin however. His hand is firmly pressed onto her throat, but the hand that is in Beast’s vision tells a different - albeit misleading - story.

Where the 2D Sebastians tighten their grip over their prey, Yunbastian loosens his. The effect however, is the opposite. It is like Beast is entranced by the demon, and can’t help but walk straight into the trap despite being fully aware that it is one.

It is like it had sunken into Beast’s mind what Sebastian is after only now. The moment the man moves, Beast grabs for the hem of her coat, pulling it down in an attempt to protect herself.

Now Yunbastian loosens his grip in his other hand which held her throat as well. It is only now that Beast relaxes and let’s go of the hem.

Yunbastian guides both Beast’s hands into his own, and pays immaculate attention to their height difference. He bends down and holds the woman’s gaze from below her. When he made sure that she would not resist, he made his final move.

“Skilfully, sweetly, silently...”

These were the keywords to Sebastian’s tactics, and it is indeed exactly what Yunbastian had done.

This part of the song is the reprise of the demon’s theme at the very beginning of the musical, ‘contract’. We see a man making a romantic advance on a woman, taking all steps to respect the her autonomy. But in the end all these respectful actions were but a means to an end.

This reprise should be understood as non-diegetic: obviously Yunbastian was not actually loudly betraying his manipulation tactics to his prey. He was singing the audience. Therefore he had dropped the angelic high tone he used to coax Beast and returned to his usual low voice. By giving **these lines to Sebastian and have him sing this in reprise of ‘contract’, it is like he is warning all of us against the pretenses of kindness.

Beast finally lets her guard down entirely. Sebas turns to the audience, grimacing “just as planned” so triumphantly, it would make ‘Death Note’s’ Light realise that Sebas is the actual OG here.

**TLN: These lines were originally William’s.

Now is where Yunbastian’s specialty comes in; the skin-crawling demon. Right after showing us Just-As-Planned!Sebas™, he makes a show out of pulling that concerned face before turning back to Beast. He won’t allow her to suspect that he is anything other than concerned for her well-being.

This ⇊ compassionate face is the only face Beast would know Sebastian by. Until she later learns of the truth of course, but then it was already too late...

Before this scene blacks out, we catch a last glimpse of Yunbastian pulling his leg backwards preparing for a descent to his knee. This tells us that he is going to carry through with this respectful and compassionate act, all the way until the end.

3. Conclusion

Now I have made an extensive comparison between the three media types, we can produce the following chart which compares the tactics between the Sebastians.

As I said in the introduction, I personally find the 2D Sebastians ‘creepier’, as he represents aggressive masculinity. The achievement the 2D Sebastians made did not necessarily require a demon’s skill; all it seemed to take was exceptionally good looks. It is beyond my understanding how he would have succeeded in getting Beast to talk (other than using actual demon powers, a.k.a. Yana’s divine decision).

The musical version is much more ‘unsettling’, because Yunbastian employs his experience from studying humans over the course of centuries. He knows the mechanism of ‘fear’ in and out, and is capable of bending this inborn protection mechanism all us humans have TO HIS advantage.

Yunbastian presents the face he wants you to see, masking the monster he is underneath. Instead of using brute force, he uses a far more insidious power. Yunbastian was the aggressor, but in the end, it still looks like it was Beast who talked to him, Beast who gave him her hands, her body, and Beast who chose to trust him.

Please click here for the AWESOME behind the scenes facts of this scene!

I hope this analysis was not disappointing. Thanks for reading this loooooong post until the end (*´▽｀*)ノ

[purkinje-effect]

The Anatomy of Melancholy, 67: Albatross

Table of Contents. Second Instar, Chapter 34. Go to previous. Go to next. TWs: Digestion issues, manipulative behavior. Strokes of luck.

______________________________________

“I still don’t get why you had to bring the leftover Flamer fuel.” Melancholy squirmed in the bed roll Sticks had wrapped him in to sling on his back. His stomach had churned for hours. “Are you expecting to find a replacement flamethrower?”

“Things have purposes.”

“I’m keen to overlook Mister Hawthorne bringing something frivolous, when he brought so much silt bean flour! I just might get three meals a day into you yet.”

“Getting it into me, and keeping it in me, present two different challenges.”

“You really are struggling with that Radscorpion omelette, huh.”

“I tell you, it’s not your cooking that’s got me.” ‘Choly stifled a whine and did his best to offset the rocking of Sticks’s gait. They’d cut down the Lowell Connector to follow Route 3 South, while avoiding the RobCo Towers property. “I’m sure I’d be much worse for wear if you hadn’t forced breakfast into me before we left.”

“We still have several bottles of your Melancholia, Sir, whenever you’re next in a patch you can manage to eat something.” Vigilant albeit loaded down with cargo, Angel alternated between taking the lead and taking the rear. “Sir... are you certain you’re fit to make this trip? I’m sure there’s all manner of places we could settle down. You know I do not mind looking after you, and--”

“--I’m fine.” He snorted, sinking back deeper into the ushanka to keep his eyes shut. “I just have business first.”

“Need I remind you, Mister Carey. You requested an excursion to retrieve medical grade equipment. If you’re frail enough to be on par with someone fresh off the operating table, you must be ever respectful of your limitations.”

‘Choly could feel Sticks’s shoulders bristle.

“This is a team effort, in case you’ve forgotten.”

“Wouldn’t you gentlemen rather try other nearby hospital facilities?”

“Just about every hospital I can think of has got Supers moved in, or worse. If we need this shit in tact, our best luck is probably a warehouse. I trust ‘Choly’s judgment here. He’s known about these things for months.”

Rather than question what Sticks had meant by ‘supers,’ ‘Choly leapt on the chance to reaffirm confidence in the plan.

“I worked for Walden for a year. Even though I may not have worked directly with shipping, I still handled their inbound shipments. I know how to read their directory and catalogue.”

“Exactly. I trust you to have ruled out places that wouldn’t have it.”

“Sorry it’s the location furthest out...”

“Hey, you didn’t build it there.”

‘Choly murmured, then decided to turn on his Pip-Boy radio, and it substituted for further conversation for the next half hour to Billerica.

“All right, buddy. End of the line.”

Sticks unloaded ‘Choly and helped him back to his feet, then rolled the bedding back up. The chemist smoothed at his Vault suit and coat with slow, deliberate strokes. Staring down the green, ‘Choly squared up to tug down some slack in the Vault suit, where his ammo harness had ridden it up. He continued smoothing.

“You know, I used to come here at least once weekly. Sometimes twice, after a hard day at the pharmacy. It was pretty much daily, when I was still at Chelmsford military housing. Remember how we met? In Concord?”

“Yeah, Concord...”

When Sticks ambled on to the clubhouse without another word, ‘Choly followed, still prinking all the while. Angel had zoomed on ahead, already on the porch by that time.

“I was at the malt shop. On lunch break.” He smiled to himself, straining without his cane to match Sticks’s pace. A lyric laced his voice as he somehow kept trying not to laugh. “The one next door to the Hardware Town. You sat down at my booth, and questioned how you hadn’t seen me until recently. I’d only been working at Walden for about a month by then. You asked me, what my name was. What it really was. I don’t remember people pinpointing that I’m Russian, even back then, and there you were, able to guess I’d anglicized my name. --But it was a point of fascination for you, not paranoia. The whole Mindy thing goes back to day one. You told me it’s a nickname for an American name very close to it. You remember?”

He puffed up his chest a bit, in an attempt to match his memory of Sticks’s human voice.

“‘Mindy,’ you said, ‘Mindy, I sure could use a roommate, and it sure seems like you stand to nip a lengthy daily commute. With our combined salaries, we could afford a plush new house in the suburbs. And you look like the sensible sort of fellow that wouldn’t just help with rent. You and I, we could broker a beautiful partnership.’”

“You’re a sentimental sap,” Sticks ribbed, spotting him as he took the clubhouse steps.

“So what if I am! I was a little obtuse to recognize our chemistry for what it was. Hm.” He stopped at the front door. “I suppose, in a way, meeting you is the reason I stopped coming here every single day after work.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

‘Choly looked to him at length, and smiled broadly.

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

The ghoul grabbed him around the shoulder and shook him for emphasis, then held the door for him.

By the time they’d entered, Angel had already located Bogey and coaxed it from its hiding spot. The brass Handy sped up to them with a canister of water in two tendrils.

“Gentlemen! I won’t allow a single word of news until you’ve hydrated from your long trip. Come! Sit!”

The pair followed it into the dining area, where they took to a table near the center. The Handy used its pincer as a can opener for the two of them, and they accepted their water graciously. Sticks chugged the entire tin while ‘Choly sipped at his own.

“You sound like you’re feeling better, at any rate.” Sticks slouched back in the chair.

“It’s not every day I can remember anything with clarity. To remember something fondly, with that clarity... It’s good medicine, is all.”

“You, eh, seemed a bit under the weather last you came by,” Bogey agreed. “Are things all right?”

“Don’t worry about me. We’ve come back down for you. I’ll tell you, my original plan was to take you to Lowell once I could, but... --Yes, the Devils were taken care of, but robots with as good a nature as yours... Well, they just have no place there.”

Relief rippled from Bogey, and it circled them eagerly as though enthusiastic waitstaff anticipating orders.

“Oh, that is the best news I’ve heard in ages! My servos can breathe. Do go on.”

“Like I said, my plan was to take you to Lowell. There’s a settlement of folks in the Concord suburbs, Sanctuary Hills. I’m confident it’s a perfect fit, for you and them both. There’s a mechanic who can do maintenance on you. And Garvey, he’s incredibly protective of the group. The married couple, they take some getting used to, but I know you’ll warm up to each other. And Mama. Mama Murphy’s the whole reason I came out this way to begin with.”

“Concord is something of a transit from here. The thought that I could be around humans again after all this time, however. It simply has me sparking with delight.”

“We came from Lowell on foot,” Sticks reminded, using a third chair to kick up his feet as he leaned back on his arms behind his head. “We can make it to Sanctuary easy. Especially now that you and we makes four.”

“What kind of timetable do you suppose we’re on, Mister Carey?” Angel asked. It had returned to the main room after unloading the biggest cargo in the locker rooms. “It’s already noon.”

“Forgive my manners. Sticks, Bogey. Bogey, Sticks. Well,” ‘Choly thought, “we should assess what we can afford to bring along with us. It would be a shame to leave anything valuable behind, if there’s not going to be anybody here to make use of it.”

“Surely you don’t mean that you intend to loot the clubhouse,” Bogey sputtered, shrinking back.

‘Choly straightened up in his seat and made himself take another drink of water. The ghoul frowned at him.

“What he means to say is, we’re relocating the amenities--and you. Once we spruce up you n’ Angel, we can best determine who carries what. You’re still going where the things are going. That’s not a problem, is it?”

“I, I suppose not." The brass Handy stuttered. "I do apologize for the scarcity of my pantry. You wouldn’t like more peanuts, would you, Mister Carey?”

“I appreciate it, but if Sticks wants any, he can have mine, too.”

“I’m good. But." The ghoul grunted as he kicked forward to lean on the table, about to get up. "If I could use your kitchen to whip something up, we haven’t eaten since around eight, and I’ve worked up an appetite." He made his way that direction, turning a moment to finger-gun Bogey with a guttural click. "Promise not to make a mess.”

“Would you happen to like a Melancholia before we get started to the robotics shed, Sir?”

He gestured for his cane, which Angel produced.

“Let’s focus on you two first.”

The two Handies escorted him to the robotics shed adjacent to the clubhouse, where he got to working on Angel. Loaded upon the curved forks of the hydraulic robotics lift, the Handy received a fresh tank of fuel. Until that time, ‘Choly hadn’t got a genuine look at the broken metal and melted wiring up close. No wonder Angel had been weaving the whole way to Billerica. Plugging into the workbench with his Pip-Boy to run diagnostics only confirmed the repairs would prove more complicated than he’d thought. His lip soured as he let Angel loose and slouched back to sit on the stool. Angel awaited elucidation.

“Bogey, would I be able to bother you to do something somewhat gruesome for me?" When it watched him, he looked up to it. "Mister Handy ocular lens wiring functions with a certain amount of, how to put it. Each position, it bears a load. Missing one causes circuitry misfires in the others. I can’t just rewire the ocular socket to bypass the missing lens hardware, like I thought I would. I know there were still some parts leftover from when your coworkers, erm. I hate to ask, but would you two go find an in tact ocular lens on the green that I could use to repair Angel?”

“Is that entirely--”

“--Something of a transplant, then! Ha-ha!" Angel encouraged Bogey to come with it on the chore. "Humans have to do this all the time, chap. Don’t you rattle your nuts and bolts over it!”

“I suppose, if it helps.”

‘Choly worked at finishing off his water, and watched the clubhouse out the open roll-up door.

Sure would’ve been nice if Jacob had come out here to help. Things would go much more quickly. But I guess he deserves a break after carrying me all this way. Hopefully he won’t have to carry me home. He bit his lip. "...Or to Nashua.”

“Here we are, then, Sir!”

‘Choly jerked out of his daze, presented a full brass Handy ocular lens.

“Thank you, Bogey," he thanked.

Angel loaded itself back into the robotics bench, while its friend held the component.

“Angel calmed me over the whole notion. It’s still a piece from General Atomics, and a piece from a Mister Handy, at that. And I trust you’ll be delicate with my friend.”

“I’ll port all four colorations, after this repair takes," Angel beamed. "To think--I’ll even be part brass! Bogey, I’m most confident in Mister Carey’s capabilities.”

“I’ll do my best. Just having the part makes me much more likely to succeed.”

“I hope Mister Sticks doesn’t take exception to how long we’ve left him alone in the clubhouse," Bogey fretted. "Should I go to check on him, do you think?”

“I’m sure he’s fine. I’d rather you stayed here. I have to power Angel off to work on it, so it won’t be able to assist me." This didn’t entirely reassure the brass Handy, so he added, "Once I’ve got the firmware repair sequence initiated, you can go check on him.”

Bogey liked that much better.

“Before we start on anything, though. Angel, could I bum a Berry?”

Fueled by the nootropic, the chemist worked on his robot, with his robot’s friend fetching tools and holding up the component to latch into the bench’s series of hydraulic pulleys. The moment the Pip-Boy had executed the bench’s scan, Bogey zipped off like its vitality depended on it.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d think Bogey’s more worried about the clubhouse than Sticks.”

The remark soaked in a ways, and he petrified in guilt. Of course Bogey was preoccupied with tending its clubhouse. For the past year, the Billerica Golf Course had been its sole responsibility once the Devils had felled all its fellow robots.

He checked the time and wiped at his face.

Five already. We burned the whole day just getting here and managing this one task. Even if we could head out right now, the sun would set on us before we got to Sanctuary. Maybe I’ll get lucky, and Jacob’s been taking inventory of the clubhouse while I was repairing Angel.

Once Angel came back online, he ran a second series of diagnostics to guarantee the optical lens had installed correctly. The two took a skimming survey of the repair shed, making note of the various tools and materials not too large or heavy to transport, before returning inside.

On the way up the back steps, ‘Choly recalled that Olivia had forbidden the Deenwood robots to let Sticks go unchaperoned. Between that and remembering how the ghoul had rummaged his own secretary the night before, uncertain queasiness overtook him. Angel held the door open for him, and he swallowed in anticipation of something unbecoming.

The door shut behind him, and he found that Sticks had in fact put his time to use. Rather than laze about like he probably would have wished to, on the bar and tables he’d organized the cookware and serveware from the kitchen, the toiletries and clothing from the locker rooms, and even the cleaning supplies from the utility closet. The ghoul sat back at a table, tapping the end of a golf pencil at a clipboard.

“Oh, good. Maybe Bogey can help you two." He snorted hollowly. "Everything go well?”

“It will be some time before I’m sure of my sensors," Angel said, "but I’m certainly in one piece again, thank you.”

“Did you need any tune-ups?" ‘Choly asked Bogey. "I think it’s too late to expect to leave out tonight, but I could take a look at you tomorrow before we leave.”

“I’m right as rain, after all you did for me last week, Sir.”

“Bogey says it’s pretty sure it can carry about 150 pounds," Sticks remarked coolly, looking over everything he’d written down. "Now that it’s been serviced, Angel can take about 200. And I can carry about 100, 125. So uh. About 400 between us? But, gotta to take ‘Choly into consideration... Anything he carries will count toward Angel’s limit... Help me out here.”

“Let’s just call me 125, if that’s what you’re asking. So... what, 325, split between us? What all do you think we need to take to Sanctuary? The Quincy survivors don’t have much beyond what’s been left there.”

Sticks stared at his paper with a difficult brow.

“You rattled off five people earlier, so at least one good set of pans. I’d say at least one good cup, bowl, and plate for each of ’em, too. The clothes shouldn’t weigh too much. Anything they don’t wear, they can scrap for fabric. Bogey wasn’t kidding, either. All I found in the way of food was eleven Nuka-Colas and about ten pounds of expired peanuts.”

“Oh dear, they’re expired!" Bogey fretted. "Are the pops all right?”

“Oh I had a Nuka-Cola, and a bag of peanuts, and was fine," ‘Choly reassured. He refused to let Sticks slight Bogey’s hospitality over things it couldn’t help.

“I do agree that we should take our time being picky here." Sticks set down the clipboard. "If we rush, we might miss something useful.”

“I don’t see any golfing paraphernalia," ‘Choly observed, finally sitting, one table over. "I’d at least like to comb the green for a replacement bag, even if I don’t find more clubs.”

“I didn’t have a chance yet, to scout the sports stock. I can’t expect too much, considering the Devils hit it. I mean, they left next to nothing. I’m surprised you managed to pull together a playable set of clubs, really. They mowed down so many robots. There’s probably not even a full golf cart’s worth of parts left. I mean no disrespect to you, Bogey, or your buddies, but I legit had not directly witnessed what the Devils were capable of until walking up to this clubhouse today.”

“Mm!" Angel snipped in indignation. "Yes, and aren’t you glad they’re GONE now! An absolute scourge!”

‘Choly caught himself almost gawking at Sticks, and he slouched in grief.

“So we’re in agreement that we’re not going to try to rush out of here tonight?”

“We’re here for the night, Mindy.”

“Oh, do let me help inventory it all," Bogey insisted. "They are, in a way, my things, after all.”

“Of course, pal." Sticks shot it a grin. "Don’t sweat a thing.”

By nightfall, they had everything prepared to pack up. Sticks made himself a reconstituted cream stew for dinner while ‘Choly finally relented to a Melancholia for himself. They made use of the locker room to wash their faces and brush their teeth. ‘Choly stripped down to just his Vault suit, and Sticks took off everything but his jeans and tee.

“Are you sure you’re all right with me sleeping on the couch?”

‘Choly could hear Sticks fidgeting in his bedroll in the floor next to him. He made a face in the dark.

“I’d be more all right if you’d get down here with me, if we’re honest.”

“Are you just being like that because you’d rather have the couch?”

“It’s just, we can’t both fit on the couch.”

“I’m not up here because I think I deserve it more or anything.”

“That’s not what this is." Sticks huffed. "You’ve got me liking having a warm body next to me.”

“Would you sleep better if I got down there?”

“Won’t you?”

‘Choly stifled the reflex to object to sleeping in the floor, but he remembered aching all the same waking from the couch last week.

He shoved the bedding off onto Sticks, who sputtered into a chuckle, and got up to help push the bedrolls together. Once they had amassed their pile, Sticks spooned him. They lay there comfortably for some time, but ‘Choly remained awake.

“Could I ask you something, Jacob?”

“Mhh.”

“It’s just, I’m still having trouble with the whole Magnetizer double-dose mess. Everything about that felt... I don’t know. It felt off." He pulled Sticks’s hand around him tighter. "You got something out of that, didn’t you?”

Sticks ran his hand along ‘Choly’s thigh.

“I got you. I guess I can be candid with you, since you’re clearly on board even without me relying on a chem boost. You asked me why I didn’t bank on the effect of Magnetizer with the Gen or the Furriers. I needed to bank on it with you. I couldn’t risk you turning down my proposition. Not until you had a chance to really warm up to the whole idea. You have warmed up to me, haven’t you? Warmed up to us actually giving this ’us’ thing a shot?”

The inside of ‘Choly’s face burned.

“...And the sex before the Unfolding?”

“Icing on the cake.”

“Everything’s a transaction with you. You certainly bought me.”

Sticks pulled him closer, to sleepily nuzzle in the crook of his neck.

“For you, no price is too high.”

Go to Next »»»

[hopesilverheart]

Meet me under the mistletoe

(read on ao3)

Pairing: Lydia/Catarina Rated: Gen Summary: “Oh god, never say that again,” Lydia mock-gagged. “And don’t mention kissing me when during half-time, you’re going to jinx us and then we’re going to have to-”

“And here’s our next lucky couple!” The announcement caught Lydia’s attention before she could finish her sentence and she felt herself pale dramatically as her eyes landed on the kiss-cam, perfectly zoomed onto Alec and her. “What do you say, love birds, fancy a kiss underneath the mistletoe?”

Or: A tale of bad luck, mistletoe, and Catarina as a knight in shining armour.

For the @malecdiscordserver Advent Calendar

If there was one thing Lydia loved about faking a relationship with Alec for their parents’ sake, it was the amazing dates they got out of the deal.

She wasn’t sure how the Lightwoods had obtained VIP tickets for a Yankees’ game, but she wasn’t about to complain. All Alec had had to do was mention how much Lydia loved baseball and his parents had handed the tickets over like they weren’t worth hundreds of dollars each. 

So as much as she hated having to pretend to date Alec to cover his secret gay love affair and her own preference for women, she had to admit it wasn’t all bad. At least not when their parents decided to spoil them with ‘couple gifts’ in an attempt to strengthen their relationship and ensure a marriage between the two of them. 

(Lydia would never admit it, but the increasingly extravagant presents were the main reason why she was still keeping up the charade.)

“You know, I’ve never actually been to a game before,” Alec said out of nowhere as half-time rolled around. “My parents always said I wouldn’t enjoy it and Izzy backed their statement, so I figured it was one of those things I just wouldn’t like.”

“And Magnus didn’t try to change your mind about that?” Lydia’s eyebrows flew up. She didn’t know Alec’s lover as much as she wanted to, but they’d had a few conversations about the Yankees and she found it hard to believe that he hadn’t already tried to plan a baseball game date with Alec.

“He did,” Alec shrugged sheepishly. “But I think he was also convinced I wouldn’t have a nice time, because he changed his mind pretty quickly. The only reason I’m even here is because of how excited you seemed to be about this game.”

“Of course I’m excited! The Yankees are my favourite team and these are VIP seats!” Lydia exclaimed, gesturing at the field in front of them emphatically. “Sometimes, I wonder how we’re even friends.”

“Pure obligation on my part,” Alec smirked, chuckling when Lydia slapped his arm playfully. “And the need for a fake girlfriend, of course.”

“Ah yes, now I remember,” Lydia hummed in agreement. “I certainly didn’t plan on keeping this friendship up after we dropped the charade. I hope you won’t be too heartbroken; I know you’ve always been a little more attached than me.”

“Very funny, Branwell,” Alec rolled his eyes, his face scrunching up in vague disgust as his eyes landed on something in the distance. “Oh god, they made the kiss-cam holiday themed.”

Intrigued, Lydia turned her gaze toward the game screens and felt an amused smile tug at her lips as she spotted the pictures of mistletoe framing the kiss-cam. She’s never been the biggest fan of the short romantic breaks during games, but she was a fan of Christmas, and anything related to it never failed to make her smile. 

“You’re such a sap,” Alec groaned, jolting her out of her thoughts. “Seriously, all it takes is one mention of Christmas and you get the dopiest look on your face. I get that the holidays are magical, but there’s no need for that much enthusiasm.”

“On the contrary,” Lydia grinned. “That way I get rid of all my happiness during the winter season and can go right back to scaring the interns as soon as mid-January hits. It’s the best way to keep them on their toes. I make all of them believe I’ve changed and let the spirit of Christmas turn me into a bundle of joy, and then I remind them that all good moods are temporary and should never be trusted. Not in our field, at least.”

“Brutal,” Alec grimaced. “Thank god we were interns at the same time. You would have terrified the hell out of me.”

“That’s the goal, Lightwood,” Lydia pointed out, catching a glimpse of a happy couple making out a little too intensely from the corner of her eye. “Some people really need to get a room.”

“They’re just feeling very festive, I’m sure,” Alec teased, raising his eyebrows at her. “Here I thought you were all about the Christmas season. Does it really only take a kiss to change your mind? If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were jealous. Do you need me to kiss it better, darling?”

“Oh god, never say that again,” Lydia mock-gagged. “And don’t mention kissing me when during half-time, you’re going to jinx us and then we’re going to have to-”

“And here’s our next lucky couple!” The announcement caught Lydia’s attention before she could finish her sentence and she felt herself pale dramatically as her eyes landed on the kiss-cam, perfectly zoomed onto Alec and her. “What do you say, love birds, fancy a kiss underneath the mistletoe?”

Lydia gulped, hoping she didn’t look half as disgusted on camera as she felt on the inside. One of the many rules she and Alec had put in place when they’d started their fake relationship was a strict no-touching policy, and kisses definitely fit into that category. They barely even held hands in front of their parents, and that was already more than enough for Lydia. 

“You fucking jinxed it,” she hissed under her breath, plastering a smile onto her face as the came stubbornly remained in place. “Now what are we going to do? Because unless your dashing beau comes to our rescue by appearing next to you and making out with you very publicly, I don’t really know how we’re supposed to get out of this with dignity.”

“Surely they move on if the pair doesn’t do anything,” Alec frowned. “What happens if the cam lands on siblings?”

“Doesn’t happen half as often as you might think,” Lydia answered. “And it does move on, but I don’t want the entire stadium to think I’m a coward.”

“Oh my god, you and your stupid pride,” Alec muttered, sending her a disbelieving glare. “I may have jinxed us, but I’m not so prideful as to ignore our perfectly crafted rules for the sake of a kiss-cam.”

“Come on now, doesn’t a kiss under the mistletoe sound romantic?” The announcer continued, earning cheers from what felt like the entire crowd. 

Before Lydia could truly panic and ruin everything with Alec, she felt a gentle tapping on her shoulder and promptly lost her breath as she turned to stare at the neighbour to her left. She wasn’t even sure when the woman had gotten there, because she definitely hadn’t been around during the first half of the game. 

Lydia would have remembered a face as beautiful as hers. Hell, she probably wouldn’t have followed a single minute of the match if she’d known there was an angel sitting right next to her. 

“Feel free to refuse my offer, but you look like a deer caught in headlights and I could never forgive myself if I let you go through with something you’re clearly not comfortable doing,” the woman started, tilting her head in Alec’s direction. “Would a kiss from me be any better?”

“Absolutely,” Lydia blurted out, blushing brightly as the woman laughed delightedly. “I mean, it would be a shame not to take advantage of the mistletoe. Isn’t there some kind of curse that lands upon those who dare ignore mistletoe when it’s all but ordering them to kiss?”

“I certainly don’t want to test that theory,” the woman answered, her gaze softening as she cupped Lydia’s cheek and pressed a gentle kiss to her lips, stealing Lydia’s breath away with a single touch. 

Around them, the crowd cheered and clapped as the announcer said something - undoubtedly ridiculous - before letting the cam move onto someone else. Not that Lydia noticed when it happened, too caught up in her savior’s dark eyes to focus on anything else. 

“Wow,” she whispered. “I mean, thanks. Thank you for that, for- For saving me from kissing my very gay best friend, I guess.”

“Anytime,” the woman chuckled. “It’s always a pleasure to help out fellow queers in need. Besides, my intentions were hardly selfless. I saw a pretty girl on the kiss-cam and thought it would be a shame to miss out on such a golden opportunity, especially given how discomfited you looked at the thought of kissing that lovely young man.”

“Yeah, I’m not sure his boyfriend would forgive me,” Lydia grimaced. “And I’m glad you decided to act on your selfish intentions.”

“So am I,” the woman replied. “I’m Catarina, by the way.”

“Lydia,” the blonde breathed out.

“Any chance this seat is free?” Catarina asked, gesturing at the chair she’d already claimed for herself.

“For you? Absolutely,” Lydia answered without hesitation, subtly kicking Alec in the shins as he burst into laughter before smiling back at Catarina.

When he excused himself ten minutes after the cam incident, however, Lydia told herself she’d have to apologise later and thank him for his sudden disappearance. No matter how good a fake boyfriend he was, Lydia had to admit that having a real date - or something of the sort - by her side was far better.

[ain-t-bovvered]

15x07 Commentary

YEAH I’M SO LATE BUT I HAVE SHIT TO DO .

Bunch of tired and caffeinated Europeans ( plus a sleepy American) scream together, and then die and try to get on with their day ( lol AS IF)

@smol-and-grumpy​ (Nat)

@dean-winchesters-bacon​  (Kat)  

@waywardbaby​  (Zee)

@ain-t-bovvered  (Giulia)

Nat : 3

Nat : 2

Nat : 1

Nat : go

Giulia: Yas eileen

Zee: This thing with the bullet I still don’t completely get

Kat: So happy she’s back

Kat: It’s not a real bullet

Giulia: Us

Nat : do they always have to have a flashback tho

Zee: Future corpses

Kat: But it’s explained a bit more this episode

Nat : Tag yourself

Giulia: I know the blonde one

Giulia: I’m the brunette

Zee: I’m the brunette

Kat: Brunette for sure

Nat : I'm a mix

Kat: Nah babe you’re the blonde

Zee: I’ve only been the blonde once

Zee: Amazing

Nat : What

Nat : I didn't hear a car

Kat: At least the blonde didn’t get murdered

Zee: Bitch wipe the spit

Nat : Yet

Giulia: Oh no clean your lips yuck

Kat: Too much throw up sound

Nat : Ridiculous. You would still hear it

Giulia: Well ok wow

Giulia: I jumped not gonna lie

Nat : Ew What is that

Zee: Was that a werewolf ?

Giulia: The wendigo feels

Nat : snorts

Kat: Red shirt of sex

Giulia: Oh look wallowing in depression again

Nat : Ah Deano

Zee: Weak

Kat: Yum

Kat: No surprise there

Zee: What’s that sound of his lips?

Nat : "Yeah"

Zee: Mostly

Kat: SAM AND EILEEN ARE SO CUTE

Giulia: OH NO I LOVE THIS

Zee: Real bacon

Nat : Real bacon?

Nat : lol

E: We might've gotten just a little carried away with the margaritas last night.

Giulia: WOW

Kat: Fucking adorable

Giulia: SO DOMESTIC

Kat: So domestic

S: You're turning down bacon?

D: Mm, yes, yeah, I'm actually... I'm gonna head out.

Kat: Get out

Giulia: DEAN’s weird

Zee: I’m good Dean motto

Nat : "I'm good" I'M GOOD, GOOOOOOOOD

D: It means I got to... I got to get out of here, okay? I just... I got to...I'm gonna take a drive, clear my head.

S: Eileen and I have stuff to do.

Giulia: Lol

Giulia: I BET U DO

Zee: Look at that face

Kat: Aw someone’s feeling like a third wheel

Zee: Aaagggggghhh

Giulia: MY GOD

Kat: The dimples

D: Um, okay, but if, uh, things go your way, just make sure you put the sock on the door so I know.

Nat : sock on the door

Zee: Sock on the door

Kat: The wink melts

Giulia: not only on the door

Nat : well that would be highly uncomfortable

Giulia: Oh shush you know what im talking about

Nat : What's with the hair

Kat: DUKES IS A CLUE

Zee: Can he shut his face ?

Giulia: The accent lol

Giulia: He weird

Nat : Jensen's jealous that the sheriff can have an accent and he doesn't

Zee: Do you all talk like that Kat ?

Kat: Excuse you. I do not speak like that.

Giulia: Snort

Kat: Dean is not impressed

Zee: Can we focus on the scruff for just a sec?

Giulia: And the crazy hair

Nat : SHUT YO FACE

Kat: The blue steel

Giulia: You’ve got the look

Zee: Is he hitting on him?

Giulia: IS IT TIME

Zee: Swayze’s???

Kat: Roadhouse nod

Zee: Look at that strut

Giulia: Nice

Nat : Fun that there's only one parking spot left right in front

Giulia: I wanna go in a dump like that

Nat : Lots of Woo girls

Giulia: Hand it over

Nat : Get in line

Giulia: Lol i like her. Will she die

Giulia: Oh well now she will

Zee: Nice

Nat : Ow

Kat: Damn girl

Giulia: Cute. They cute

Kat: Dean friggin Winchester

Zee: Is this ep filled with his close ups?

Giulia: So cute

Nat : HE owns this joint?

Zee: I’m happy

Nat : Will this be the place where Dean will always end up tho. Because his friend owns the joint

Zee: Look at that couple

Giulia: SO CUTE

Giulia: the stares

Giulia: Cute

Kat: SO CUTE

Giulia: Why don t we do something fun

Zee: Do something fun

S: Yeah. Um... ideas?

E: I mean, a few.

Zee: Go girl

Kat: GET IT EILEEN

Giulia: NO. COME ON

Zee: Seriously ???

Giulia: AH BUT IT S CAS SO OK

Kat: It’s not okay

Kat: CAS IS A FUCKING COCKBLOCKING ANGEL

Nat : Ah

Giulia: my bb has done nothing wrong in his entire existence,ever, shut yo mouths

Zee: WHAT A COCK BLOCK

Nat : Snort

S: So we've been looking for signs of Chuck and Lilith

C:  Lilith?

S: Yeah, uh, she's back.

Giulia: U should have read your messages cas

Nat : Hey, nobody can say that they've been cock blocked by an aNgEL oF tHe LorD

Zee: I think that Sam’s virginity might have grown back man

C: So there may be some of you inside Chuck.

Giulia: Ew

Zee: Ew

Nat : Is that sexual

Giulia: Family business beers lol

Kat: I think you’re right

L: I always liked that crusty son of a bitch.

Giulia: Awe dad. Crusty sob lol

Kat: Oh.

Kat: No

Giulia: Ah well praises from dad Winchester

Zee: His crinkles are distracting me

Giulia: And his smirk

Kat: Aren’t they great

Nat : THE MAN IS DISTRACTING ME

Giulia: ...ah that stare

Zee: So that’s how you felt last ep? @Giulia

Giulia: Yes. U get it now

Zee: He needs to shut up

Giulia: Awe dean. And now some zoom

Nat : Dean, you don't wanna do that

Zee: That head nod hurt my soul

S: Cass, are you sure about this?

C: No, but I am sure I can't heal the wound. Maybe I can probe it.

Giulia: Yes probe cas

Zee: Probe

Kat: Ew lol

Giulia: Im ready

Giulia: Same

Zee: This is gonna sting

Nat : This is gonna sting

Nat : snorts

Giulia: Sam are you ok

Nat : a little

Giulia: Awe

Giulia: Oh wow

Kat: DAMN IT

Giulia: Nice cas

Nat : AH

Zee: Amazing

Nat : Well he's not ok now is he

Kat: Poor Sammy

Giulia: Awe that cheek rub

Zee: Sam knocked out again

D: This is Dean's other-other-other-other phone. Leave a message.

Zee: Other other other

Giulia: AH how does it feels now cas

C: Dean, I need you to call me back. Sam is hurt, and I..

Nat : How many phones does he has

Zee: Jaggers

Giulia: Look at that tuff of hair

Nat : Ew

Giulia: Slutty

Kat: Everything about him is slutty

Zee: Can’t spell it

Zee: Love it tho

Nat : Split up Triplets?

Zee: He’s gonna get some me thinks

Giulia: What a dumb stare

Kat: Ah I miss blushy Dean

Giulia: Oh him again

Nat : Who dat

Giulia: Sam winchester is hurt

Giulia: What else is new

Giulia: The one with gabe grace

Nat : A collecter

Kat: You think so huh

C: Let me rephrase. If you don't help me tonight,

Zee: Cas is serious

Giulia: WHO U CALLING

Kat: A return of badass Cas finally

Giulia: Lol yellow fever

Nat : Cas has zero patience

Giulia: Same

Zee: We’ve been knew

Giulia: U have even less

Nat : No but I just don't think that he'll get any this season cuz it won't do anything to the plot

Nat : Plot of dying guest stars

D: Trust me, uh, bigger doesn't always equal better.  

Giulia: what she said

D: Besides, who's gonna look out after the little guy? God certainly isn't.

Giulia: Damn brother that’s rough

Zee: Rough decade

Zee: No shit

Giulia: He has no idea

Kat: Ugh that smile

Nat : Dean has doubts. I hate that

Giulia: aw look that is future dean if he’s going on like that

Giulia: GIMME

L: Remember that old song your dad used to play us before we'd go out on a Hunt?

Giulia: GIMME THE SONG. GIMMIEH

D: Oh, no.

All of us: Oh, yeah.

Zee: YAS

Giulia: come on BOI

Kat: I had to look the song up

Giulia: YEAH what song

Kat: I didn’t know it 😂

Zee: LIPSYNCHING

Kat: Dukes was a clue

Zee: DUKES OF HAZARD

Giulia: idk her

Zee: THE SHOW

Giulia: still don’t know her

Giulia: AWE HE NERVOUS

Nat : YEEEEEE HAW

Giulia: YEEEEP

Kat: DEA IS SO NERVOUS AND SHY AND CUTE

Giulia: FUCK OFF

Kat: Exactly

Giulia: flips table

Kat: HE REALLY SINGS

Kat: THAT LOW NOTE

Nat : Better than Karaoke Demon Dean

Giulia: don’t let him hear you

Giulia: YAAAS

Kat: FUCK ME

Zee: Wait in line

Zee: He’s so happy I’m scared

Giulia: AWE 20sec of happiness

Kat: NO

Giulia: STOP. MY BODY CAN T TAKE IT TO

Nat : Ah

Kat: Damn I’m soaked again

Giulia: Me

Zee: Thank god don’t need my ovaries anymore

Kat: He sounds so Texan this ep

Zee: Oh fuck yeah

Kat: Them bowlegs

Nat : What a concidence

Giulia: WHO HE CALLED

Zee: Not the ghostbusters

Nat : I like Sergei. He's got attitude

Giulia: I hate him

Kat: YOU’LL FIND OUT

C: Okay, that's enough. You're here for a reason.

Giulia: Cas needs to tie his fucking tie because he slutty af

Zee: He’s following the mood of the ep

Kat: Poor Eileen so worried

Zee: Dying?

spn fandom: what else is new

Giulia: Not even surprised

Giulia: Of course he is

Nat : What else is new

Giulia: She loved jesus and america too

Giulia: So I’m a bad girl

Zee: It was a good car

Giulia: FIGHT THE FAIRIES

Nat : lol it's the tom petty song

Giulia: me in the morning

Zee: You love Jesus and America in the morning ?

Kat: Love that song

Giulia: Am I too young for that shit?

Nat : Freeeeee Faaaaallin

Giulia: No, that whiskey in the coffee. Pay attention

Zee: Yeah. Like you paid attention last week

Giulia: Well I was on the important stuff

Kat: Okay children

Giulia: Look at my confused bb

Kat: Sergei is so dramatic

Giulia: Nice shit

Zee: The legs

Giulia: Shot

Zee: Also correct

Nat : HE knows that the junkyard is NOT a runway right?

Giulia: Don t think he does

Kat: Everywhere is a runway for him

Giulia: That haircut is bad ok

Kat: I saw it coming a mile away

Nat : He ded

Zee: Wait for it

Nat : Like I said, plot of dying guest stars

Giulia: They need to stop with these jumpscares

Giulia: SERGEI

Zee: Fucker

Nat : They need to find Amara. Think Amara is sick of her brother herself. she'd probably help them without even wanting anything in return

Kat: Don’t worry Cas takes care of him

Giulia: good

Giulia: Nice Eileen

Giulia: The key to death. Psh fuck off

Kat: The key to death. That’s going to come into play I bet

Giulia: So dramatic

Zee: Cas still confused. And angry

Giulia: Look at that face

Nat : Sergei is so fucking extra

Zee: Suck it Sergei

Kat: He called Bobby

Giulia: Oh the other bobby. Forgot about him

Nat : They should get the key and open the door to the empty. Bring Jack back. And death. Ah why am I babbling

Kat: It’s what you do

Giulia: Snort

Nat : The eye squint

Kat: It doesn’t open the empty though I don’t think lol

Giulia: Wtf is in there

Kat: Aw Dean tied down. My fave

Nat : What is that thing 

Nat : What she said

Giulia: But also

Zee: Shut up

Giulia: Will dean have to kill his fwriend

Kat: 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Giulia: Nice

Zee: He will huh?

Giulia: It won’t be a great addition to his mental health

Nat : Have you been watching the same show

Kat: All his friends die

Giulia: All their friends die

Kat: Well Eileen’s back lol

Giulia:FOR HOW LONG

Kat: SHUT YOUR FACE

Giulia: I M JUST BEING REALISTIC

Kat: I know but my heart can’t take it

Nat : Every one who comes on the show die

Zee: Shush

Giulia: OH NOW YOU DO CARE

Zee: Can blood really go up the tube?

Giulia: If there is vacuum yeah

Nat : I don't think they care

Giulia: The monster needs to suck

Nat : It doesn't suck

Giulia: He stupid

Zee: Oh stop please

Kat: Come on Dean get out

Giulia: What she doesn’t say

Kat: Nice

Nat : The monster will get out

Nat : what he said

Zee: And kill lee

Awe look at Dean’s repulsion towards his friend

Giulia: Nah dean will kill lee. Because this is supernatural

Zee: Daddy’s home

Nat : Surprise

Kat: The head

Giulia: Is that the sound of water 2

Kat: Ew

Zee: God bless Texas

Nat : Why does Lee do that for again? I missed it

Zee: His happiness

Kat: Money health

Nat : Feeding people to a monster makes him happy

Kat: Because fuck everyone else

Giulia: Ah saw it

Giulia: Oh yeah dean?

Kat: The monster gives him things for keeping it fed

Nat : Ah Nat : Dean distracts me

Kat: He yummy

Zee: I kill monsters

Giulia: Awe dean . Well you become the hero or the monster you hunt i guess

Zee: Welcome to my world

Giulia: Ouch

Zee: Impaled

Giulia: That should hurt so much more

Nat : Ah, that's the cue he was talking about that didn't break at first and he had to "walk off the pain" Kat: What

Giulia: ?

He told it once at a con I think? They had a fight with a cue and the cue didn't break like twice or three times and his back was blue

Giulia: Awe bb dean

Kat: Aw his murder face. Now sad face

Giulia: CAS

Giulia: awe look at them

Giulia: Oh

Nat : Awkward

Zee: That bed is too small

Kat: No, he’s just huge

Kat: What she said

Zee: What she said

Giulia: Everything is too small concerning to sam

Nat : Preview?

Giulia: TRAILER TIME

Kat: Ya go watch

Nat : Adam snorts

Kat: ADAM

Giulia: SNORT. FAMILY SUCKS

Kat: Basically tells them to suck it lol

Giulia: you let me rot in hell. Well he ain t wrong

Nat : Can u blame him

Kat: From his view, they must

Zee: They left him there for ages

ee: I’m happy with this ep. Need to change panties but I’m happy

Zee: You can leave this out

Kat: No leave it in lol

sam and Eileen cute gif

Giulia: They kill me

Giulia: Ok but if that’s sam endgame i’m so good with that. My bb deserve it

Giulia: Hope it doesn’t end in smoke

Giulia: snort

Giulia: That was mean

Kat: Wow Giuls

Giulia: Ok but look at it from chuck’s eyes

Giulia: SHOCK FACTOR

Giulia: PLOT

Giulia: CONTINUITY

Giulia: lol

.

.

.

15x08 coming soon

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[kae-karo]

Hi Katie! I just want you to know that I want your analysis of this new sims video more than anything and I'll just patiently wait for it... Have a nice day!

hi dear!! new sims vid, did u mean dnp simulator?

dorks spending the first ten seconds dancing in fake snow 

why virtual friends???? ??

my daddies gave to me y’all,,,,,,there’s knowing your branding and then there’s acting on that knowledge and i think this may have been one time where acting on your knowledge maybe was not a good call like ily and u do u and all but

i love phil loving his branding it’s cute also shoutout to @dnpscloset​ thanks for finding it (x) bc i want one now if anyone needs a last minute xmas idea i’m lookin at u mom u always wait til the last minute

same dan, same

‘we all have new faces and new lives and everything’s changed, this is gonna be hella dramatic’ *inhale* *exhale*

‘when u imagine the howlter family’ god they’re such adorable n sentimental nerds i love them

phil’s actual default is bein a leany boye

dnp arguing about what ‘desperate’ actually is as if the entirety of their first year after meeting they weren’t talking as often as they could five hour skype calls amirite

get away from me stalker lmao bold of u to say that danny

phil sweetie i love you with my entire heart he’s so so excited abt the virtual snow i love him

tiny zoom in jumpcut at 2:08 overlapping audio interesting

a mood and a half

phil immediately going ‘yeahhhhh thin walls family hearing things they gotta get out’ abt dab and evan like m8 we get it all u think abt is sex we get it god u and ur husband really are made for each other aren’t u (dnp = devan reference #1)

‘i presume evan is also jobless’ ‘i hope so!’ phil is it really,,,,,,smth to be excited about,,,,,,,

dan’s doin a lot of the hand phone lately u cute boy

we should have a redbull what is wrong with them phil can barely handle having too much sugar y’all thought it was a good idea to have a redbull also we should have a redbull they share literally everything which tbh is probs for the best lbr phil on a whole can of redbull hmmmmm yes ik it’s v possible and in fact probable that phil had his own can let me live

‘it’s a sensible lightweight jacket’ in the fucking snow wow dan u really did just set urself up for phil to drag u about not dressing for the weather

dan’s fucking laugh at 4:39 gives me life literally there is no purer and more adorable sound like that’s up there with kittens purring

‘i think he’s gonna be a bit of a diva in this relationship’ did you mean: dan howell (dnp = devan reference #2)

[slight bit of ankle is showing] dan: ‘and now you’re wearing shorts’

where’s the lie tho honestly that lil pause before he said mate

this clip will live in infamy bc i want this in every fucking phan edit for the rest of time like i can’t even think of the right out-of-context clip right now but anything that can be answered with phil saying ‘it’s dan’ i need it

mandatory phil covering his mouth and bein a cutie

yes destroy gender roles in the snow universe (although seriously dan’s ‘life is just about uncon-doing the horrible conditioning of all these gender stereotypes, phil’ is so important also i stan phil recognizing that before dan i think it’s really easy to forget that just bc up til recently he’s not been as expressive as dan of his opinions on how stupid gender roles are doesn’t mean he doesn’t have just as if not more progressive a mindset than dan)

‘it’s like a dan vs phil’ dnp = devan #3

dan has such a lovely singing voice i miss him singing

dude phil’s eyebrows are making a Solid appearance v expressive

i s2g this is a different moment from the one above he’s just so fricken cute???

‘but they’ve got each other’s backs, phil, just like dab and evan’ yeeeeaaaa i’m gonna go ahead and go with dnp = devan reference #4 here i think that’s fair

snow angels are the least fun thing to do and yet (x - it literally won’t let me put it in bc it’s a privated vid rip)

amazing they just started having a snowball fight how cute n domestic am i talking abt dnp or dab and evan hmmmm - dnp = devan #5

i get that infinity war was a meme but lads it’s time to let it go

‘and they’re called the howlters’ lmao as if u ain’t an honorary lester daniel (dnp = devan #6)

i’m living for phil’s excitement i mean if that’s what redbull does to him i’m here for it i guess?

hi they’re dumb this was cute

‘we don’t want to be those people, but for us personally, we very much found that you just need to just move into a big city of some kind and just jump into life with both feet’ this is not only adorable advice but also where dnp simulator comes into play aka we did this so uhh dab n evan should do it (dnp = devan #7) also dan speaking for them both singular pronouns are quaking

‘don’t trust that’ what on earth are u on abt phil what don’t u trust the fuckin desert or?????

scalyburg phil stop pls we know we get it dan’s a furry ur a scaly we got it

why does dan spend an entire 7 seconds (8:40) adjusting is he moving closer to phil? switching which leg he’s sat on? idk but it lead to me pausing at this moment which was a gift in and of itself

‘the deposit on that one, plus the weekly went would make us instantly broke, so that’s fun, us when we moved to london’ bih do u hear me crying

does dan remember phil’s first manchester apartment what kind of question is that phil have u met dan he probably remembers every bloody inch of that place i mean he did remember that there wasn’t a bedside table so

stop that

middle of the city, romance festival, geekcon, pretty views and cherry blossom trees sounds like dnp’s ideal location do u get why i’m calling it dnp simulator yet also dnp = devan #8

we don’t want to move next to the karaoke legends wow dan bold of u to say after belting helena at 2am real bold

phil having flashbacks to the apt they toured where they found out people died there

hi phil just looks so excited by everything

look i’m not saying anything except they’re managing to find a lot of similarities b.w their lives and what they’re doing for dab and evan okay like this apartment is great for people-watching? which is what phil did in his manchester apt?

context whomst? idk her

shoutout to the wardrobe

big bold life-changing steps

anon spitting truth up in this house (but like,,,,,my thoughts exactly lmao i was like they’re such introverts they would’ve avoided meeting their neighbors at any cost including apparently smacking into a locked door trying to avoid small talk phil we love u bab)

casually mentioning dan saying ‘we are dil-’ was he gonna say dil’s son, maybe but i like to remember the bloops of dan repeatedly calling dab dil so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

omg okay so from like. this point on, when dan’s like ‘here is my vision’, i’m absolutely getting queer eye vibes like amateur queer eye tho like two gay nerds trying to embody queer eye in their lives a bit oh wait

okay okay okay dan u said an ensuite bathroom and then failed to add a door to the bedroom do u understand how frustrating that is???????? do u understand how stressful it was for me to watch that whole damn vid and know that u forgot the door????

a space for hobbies what hobbies who has hobbies

they learned nothing from building their house before: phil should take the mouse away from dan immediately look at him he is such a sugar baby in this jfc

god dan is so cute get these idiots a penthouse apartment super high up so he can have his bath next to a window okay he deserves that in life

stop it they’re literally agreeing on almost every single thing god they literally share a single brain

amazing

leany boye

‘they are young adults moving into their first apartment, you don’t have art!’ okay first of all don’t even go there daniel second of all i’m sorry you’re the one arguing for spending literally all their money but u don’t want to get some art bc it’s unrealistic????

dan saying lovely

phil’s mr carpet

navy??? navy? when did they? why? 

i would get involved in a criminal plot to have that / i’m gonna throw you out of one

wow pro tips makin a comeback

phil is Losing Steam

oh my god okay so i was joking but literally phil is losing steam lmao 18:35 he says ‘ayy’ and it’s so tired-sounding

leany leany boyes

okay look ik dan’s going into ‘aww poor philly’ mode but also he knew that very quickly like honestly that’s not a Thing i would ever notice about someone tbh i’m not saying it’s like Significant but damn danny was really into phil to know that shiz man

the high-fashion gigantic rug of our dreams

okay look i can’t make this up phil literally leans away for a bit and then

hello daniel’s Curl

i stan phil getting excited over plants

dab and evan will be having a mario kart fest will they (dnp = devan #9)

mirroringggggggg

dude big mood god they’re so fond and full of memories 

honestly dnp made it that way like u cannot convince me they didn’t purposely decide to do that mmkay

‘see they are ready to have their romantic dinners. and then they can pretend they have another friend and it’s fine!’ am i talking abt dnp or dab and evan who knows :) (dnp = devan #10) 

cold in the middle what on earth i literally have no memory of that i mean it could just be my shit memory but jfc they just remember that stuff goddamn

scrunchy boyes also phil where’s ur arm at hm

like i’m not fuckin joking where is it

you can’t exist without a computer i mean

what is important in life / the internet

they don’t even have fucking doors and dan’s like ‘uhm they need a terrarium’ dan i’m stressed

oh my god i’m sorry phil is so done with this now it’s actually comical

hi they didn’t add a door for the ensuite

give dnp an interior design series honestly give them any series

phil reached for dan’s hand u cannot convince me otherwise

‘not my personal taste’ really,,,,,really

when dab n evan hug dan looks at the screen n phil looks at the camera things u didn’t need to know but now u do

lmao jumpscared by the kiss

‘i feel like i’ve never nailed anything more in my entire life’ hmmmm hmmmmmmmmmm hm

the fuck was dan’s ‘getting a job’ that’s his fnaf voice u stop that

doon doon doon doon

tongue

hi uhm what the Fuck was that jumpcut at 28:30 i hate Obvious Jumpcuts with a burning passion specifically bc of dnp

[sanderstalker]

The Fault in our Sides Chapter 8 SOS

Warnings: Self deprecating thoughts, mental abuse, mind control

Word count: 1,967

________“You’re a freak!”

        “You’re a monster!”

        “Why are you yelling at the wall?”

        “She’s insane!”

        “She belongs in the Gotham Asylum!”

        “Someone call the cops!”

        “She’s fighting nothing again!”

        “Here, take this, it’s medicine.”  

        “Cuff her!”

        “We’re only trying to make you better.”

        “You’re no angel! You’re a demon!”

        “Demon girl!”

        “Multiple personality disorder is the only diagnoses...”

        “Demon girl!”

        “She’s a hopeless case…”

        “Demon girl!”

        “The asylum is our best bet.”

        “Demon girl!”

        “There is no escape from these voices,” Doubt purred into Angel’s ear, “Not while I’m still around. Not while I am here to remind you why we live alone, why we disconnected from the world in the first place.”

        “You know nothing, you wanna-be royal pain. Look, I just want to be normal, that’s all. Who wants a constant bombardment of voices in their head? Only someone INSANE would want something like that.”

        “Remember your words? You said that, straight to his face too,” Doubt grinned, a horrid, blood freezing grin that could stop the heart of any hero, “He only stays to prove that he’s not insane, that he is normal.” She practically spit out the word ‘normal’, as if it tasted like bile upon her tongue, “His so called ‘friends’ probably don’t even know about his Faults.”

        “Patton…” Angel tried to say her argument, but stopped as Doubt leered, her yellow pinprick of an eye glowing threateningly as she stared at the cowering girl.

        “You mean his, morality, something you lack, my dearest.” the dark side chuckled, “Something you discarded, a long time ago . Morality trusts, Morality saves, Morality agrees with the good! Where did that get us? Where’s our trusted friends? Where’s our mother and father? Where’s the knight in shining armor?!” Doubt hollered, her anger apparent, and control growing stronger as Angel believed every word that acted like hurtful barbed wire strings twisting around her body, “I saved you, Doubt saved us. We have a living! We aren’t stuck between padded white walls! Because of ME we’re safe. Because of ME we live happily ever after! I’M the knight in shining armor! It was always me! ME! ME!”

Angel cried as the hypothetical strings that held her captive tightened, wanting the onslaught of words and maniacal laughter coming from this being to stop. She learned her lesson, she knows who she should trust…

        “I… I’m sorry…” Angel whispered through her sobs, “Please… just make the voices go away…”

Smiling at her triumph, Doubt did just that, leaving the poor girl with an empty, yet relieved mind, her eyes an unnatural, dead, clouded shade.

        “You don’t doubt, Doubt, Angel.” the apparition sneered, “Mess with the snake, you get the fangs.”

//*\\

    Thomas paced his living room, his two most trusted friends watching with worried gazes. The only sound that came from the man was the soft thumps of his feet to the carpet, though he heard much more than that.

        “If Angel’s Deceit is in control we have NO CHANCE!” Virgil was freaking out in his usual spot on the steps, “She’ll be WAY more powerful, not to mention help from the other Faults!” His voice became distorted as his anguish rose.

        “Dude,” Talyn interrupted his pacing, “What’s going on?”

        “Oh, you know, Virgil’s having a mental BREAK DOWN and I have to deal with it!��� Thomas stated, glaring at his darker double.

        “What are you freaking out about?” Joan asked, still quite confused, “All you said on the phone was ‘emergency side’s meeting.”

Thomas grabbed a chair, and sat in front of the two, sighing as he ran a hand through his hair.

        “Angel… may have a Deceit, just like me… and this version may be in complete control.” He explained, “She completely shut down at the park and the entire plan… I think it may have been completely ruined.”

        “Shit…” Talyn breathed, leaning back into the couch.

        “Have you tried to contact her?” Joan asked, and Thomas shook his head.

        “I haven’t gotten anything from her either.”

The group settled into a solemn silence, though Virgil continued with his rantings and worried scenarios Angel could have wound up in.

        “I sit in solemn silence on a dull dark dock,” Came the smooth talk of Deceit, “In a pestilential prison with a life long lock,” Thomas glared at him as he continued with the simple theatre warm up, “Awaiting the sensation of a short sharp shock, from a cheap and chippy chopper on a big black block.”

        “Well that was creepy,” Patton rose up next to the snake faced villain.

        “A simple tongue twister, but it fit the occasion,” Deceit grinned.

        “That was in no way a good fit for the current atmosphere,” Logan stated as he too arose from his usual spot.

        “I’VE GOT IT!” Roman popped up, making Thomas fall from his seat from being startled.

        “You do, do you?!” Deceit smiled, “Let’s hear this wonderful plan!”

        “We rush to Angel’s house! Grab her, and carry her out! Bringing her here to talk, and sort things out!”

        “We don’t even know where she lives,” Virgil deadpanned.

        “Well…” Roman started to sink back down, “I never said I had all of it…”

    Just before he could disappear, a small voice could be heard amidst the chaos. Everyone became quiet, aside from Joan and Talyn, who had been quiet for the majority of the time.

        “Did anyone else hear that?” Roman asked, earning a resounding ‘yeah’, except from Deceit as he hid something behind his back.

        “Um… excuse me?” came the voice once again, “I-I can’t see…”

Sighing, the dark side moved over, allowing the whole of the room to see the tiny form, of Timidness. Everyone gasped as they looked to her in alarm.

        “What are you doing here?”

        “How did you get here?”

        “Where’s Angel and the others?”

These were only a small fraction of the questions asked, many by Thomas as he neared her, leaving Joan and Talyn to ask their own.

        “What the HELL is going on Thomas?” Joan asked as they yanked the worried man by his hand.

        “Timidness is here,” he explained, hurriedly, “Where’s Angel?”

The shaking girl shrunk back a bit from the sudden bombardment of questions.

        “Sh-she’s at home…” was her answer.

        “Then how are you here?” Patton asked as he rubbed her back soothingly.

        “I… I-I… I’m not… sure,” she stuttered, “Angel… she… she needs-” her hand was clapped to her mouth before she could continue, and she started to struggle in order to get it off, scratching at her wrist as she did so. Patton ended up having to use his not well known strength to keep her from scratching herself raw. She continued to cry as she looked to them with a pleading gaze.

        “Is it about Angel?” Patton asked her, earning a quick nod.

        “Is she in trouble?” Thomas asked, and everyone became more worried as they earned another nod.

        “Well, there’s nothing we can do here.”

        “HOW COULD YOU?!” Roman hollered, making Deceit look at him with an exasperated gaze.

Thomas ignored the outburst, bringing his full attention to Timidness.

        “Can you take us to her?” he asked her.

Timidness did nothing for a few minutes, the tension rising as she cried. When she nodded for the third time, Thomas went on a rampage to find his keys.

        “Joan, Talyn, I need you to stay here and watch the house,” he ordered, “I’m sorry but this is really important.”

Talyn shook their head, “Don’t worry about us! You go.”

        “Yeah! We have the fridge to raid!” Joan smiled, earning a jab to their stomach from Talyn.

      “Thanks guys,” Thomas chuckled, and found that the sides, including Timidness, were already in the car. Getting in the front seat, he had Logan switch seats with Timidness so that she was in the front, a hand still held to her mouth. “Just point the way,” he said softly, and the girl nodded.

    It took the majority of half an hour to find Angel’s home, the ride bumpy and unpaved the whole way up the small hill. They wasted no time as all filed out of the car and ran to the house, Timidness disappearing once they neared the door. Thomas knocked, and they waited for a reply. When none came, Roman announced his idea.

        “Break down the door!”

        “WAIT!”

But Virgil was to late in his warning as Thomas slammed his shoulder in the wooden barrier.

    With a large clatter, the door had swung on it’s hinges, not locked but now broken. All zoomed around the cabin, looking for the poor girl, even Deceit as he nonchalantly looked under the couch.

        “GUYS IN HERE!” Patton hollered, earning everyone’s attention as they came running.

They came upon Angel, curled up on the floor of her bedroom, a dark shadow-like creature looming above her. This being looked their way, and scowled before disappearing, leaving nothing but a wicked glare to remember them by.

    Thomas ran to Angel, kneeling by her side.

        “It’s okay… I’m here.”

The girl bolted from his touch, hitting the wall in her frenzy as she shied away.

        “NO! You-you’re insane! I’m not like that! I want to be normal! Normal!”

Flinching at her words, Thomas backed away, seeing her hate for what she saw in both of them.

        “Hey… kiddo,” Patton tried to soothe the girl, “It’s okay to be out of the ordinary.”

        “I’m not out of the ordinary, I’m an outcast!” Angel seethed.

        “Of course you’re not,” Patton smiled softly, “We want to be friends!”

        “Who would want to be friends with a LUNATIC like THOMAS!” was the girl’s response, causing Patton to fall backwards in his shock.

Thomas stood up and looked to his sides, watching as Patton disappeared, being followed by an appalled Roman, who turned away before leaving. Logan shaking his head, disappointed, before disappearing. Virgil tried to near the crying girl, but was hissed at, and he left as well, while Deceit stood smiling in the corner, watching the ‘show’ play out.

        “Angel… It’s okay… I mean… I-I think… it’s okay…” Thomas floundered for comforting words, finding none as he hung his head, the floor a more interesting sight as the world seemed to turn grey.

    Deceit walked away from his corner, smiling as he leaned into Thomas’ ear.

        “You’re all so naive,” he chuckled, “Why would a sssssnake like me, help it’s prey? Of course she doesn’t want to be friends with you. She’s right that you’re insane, your dear friends just don’t want to admit it.”

Thomas fell to his knees as he started to believe these words, a familiar feeling of helplessness that he had not felt in a long time overwhelming him as he broke down into tears.

        “Well you sure know your way around someone’s mind.” Doubt chuckled as she materialized from the shadows.

        “It’s not like I needed help getting more control over him,” Deceit sighed, “Your presence at the park was hated by Thomas as a whole.”

Doubt laughed at him, a maniacal sound that made Angel flinch, and shy away from the apparition.

        “Please, if anything you still need my help with controlling that pile of emotions,” she sneered at the broken man, “You still speak in lies, I broke that curse years ago.”

        “How is that possible?” the yellow eyed man asked, curious, and wanting to know just how that could be a possibility.

        “Who does Thomas trust? Who practically runs his life? Who do we know, and love with all. Our. Hearts?” Doubt grinned, her yellow pinprick of an eye gleaming ever brighter as she revelled in how much control she had.

Deceit gave his gender bent double a knowing smile as he made Thomas rise from the floor, as a puppet would by it’s strings, and walked out to his car.

__________

Hey sorry this took a while been busy with school and stuff

Co author @datfandomgirl1

The Fault in our Sides Tag list:

@whatwashernameagain, @logicallyanxious-morallyromantic, @anony-phangirl, @sleepyssnail, @phlying-squirrel, @virgilcrofters, @ierindoodles, @yangsembercelica, @barlibismi, @mavisturtle

[secretagentspydetectiveninja]

Heely beloved, we are gathered here today

(A NEW CHAPTER APPEARS!! Anyway here’s that silly overly fluffy rarepair fic based off this silly thing and totally counts for week 2 of Atypical April) (did anyone want ace Adrien? Ace-drien? Well you’re getting ace Adrien. And also ace Alix. EVERYONE IS ACE SHUSH)

(AO3) (chapter 1) (there are only gonna be 3 in total don’t worry)

 Chapter Two

The fifth skate date was not too different from the fourth one. They spent some of the time chatting, some of the time skating, and rather a lot of the time, well... It wasn’t that there had been a lack of physical contact before, since Adrien had kept stumbling over and Alix had to keep picking him up, but this felt different somehow. She was actually, consciously holding his hand sometimes, even though she didn’t need to. He found it comforting – he never got much physical reassurance from anyone these days, especially not from the type of person who could absolutely fearlessly beat someone up and rarely showed affection like this. The fact that she clearly thought him worth spending time with… it made his heart swell.

He still couldn’t quite figure out whether or not he had just convinced himself to like her, only because it made the prospect of marriage easier, or if he actually liked her. After all, he had never been interested in her as anything other than a friend back when they were at school. But that time he had been head over heels for Ladybug, and never really thought about anyone else.

Things were different now – and he did feel the same way about her as he had with Ladybug back then. This hadn’t happened with Chloé when he had considered marrying her, so perhaps there was actually something in it…

Halfway through the sixth skate date, it suddenly began to rain.

“I don’t think that’s going to clear up any time soon,” Adrien said, glancing up at the sky and seeing it covered in dark grey clouds.

“I guess this skate date is over early then…”

“Wait, don’t go home in the rain!” He took her arm in his to stop her skating off. “Why don’t you come inside for some time?”

Her face lit up. “Wait, really? Am I allowed?”

“I’m not sure, but my father’s not home right now anyway so he won’t know. You can stay until the rain stops if you want.”

“Thanks!”

He took her into the house, quickly popping into the office to ask Nathalie to get some towels to dry them off, since they were drenched and dripping rainwater everywhere. Once they were no longer completely soaked, the two of them went into Adrien’s room to wait out what seemed to have become a thunderstorm.

“We could play video games,” Adrien said, putting away his skates and helmet, “or we could just talk, or there’s plenty of other things in here for us to…”

He turned around to see her staring up at the rock climbing wall in a stunned, awed silence.

“…Or you could climb the wall, if you want.”

She didn’t need to be told twice. Without even saying a word, she scrambled up the wall so fast she was at the top in under a minute, where she half turned around and had a look down at the view.

“Dude. I want to marry your rock climbing wall.”

Adrien couldn’t help but burst into laughter – that was so close and yet so far from what he wanted.

“Seriously! You have an entire actual rock climbing wall inside your actual bedroom, that’s the coolest thing ever…”

“I don’t have much time to use it though,” he said. “But you’re always welcome to have a go on it whenever you want.”

“Really? Adrien, you’re the best!”

He blushed and looked at the ground, not even sure what to say to that.

In any case, the storm did not seem to be passing and was just getting heavier. After a few more turns climbing the wall, Alix suggested just going out and skating in the rain anyway, saying that it would be fun. Adrien knew perfectly well that he probably wouldn’t be allowed to if he asked about it… so he decided it would be better just not to ask in the first place.

They went back outside together and spent far too long splashing through the puddles in the courtyard like responsible adults, getting gross rainwater everywhere, laughing all the while. Adrien was sure he hadn’t done something so fun and reckless since back at school at least. He could just feel the stress of his modelling job and his father’s expectations lifting off his shoulders the longer he spent messing around and having fun. It was so freeing! Like being a kid again.

Eventually evening started to fall and he began to feel tired. Without caring how wet the ground was, he sat down to rest. “That was so much fun… it’s getting kind of cold now, though…”

He sneezed into his sleeve – whoops, hopefully he wasn’t ill. His father wouldn’t be too happy about that.

“It’s okay, I’m not cold, I’ll warm you up.”

Before he had time to react, she had snuggled up to him with her arms wrapped around him. He sat perfectly still, hardly even daring to breathe. He definitely was not cold anymore all of a sudden.

They sat huddled like penguins for what seemed like hours, though couldn’t possibly have been anywhere near that long, until finally the rain began to let up.

“It’s probably well past the normal time you go home at,” Adrien said.

“I know, but I don’t wanna let go,” Alix mumbled, clinging on tighter. “You’re comfy.”

“Wait, really?”

“Yeah, trust me. I don’t even like hugs. You seem to be the exception.”

Adrien felt like his insides were turning into gooey mush. He buried his face in her hair, trying to hide how much he was blushing. “That’s r-really sweet of you…”

“That’s another exception. Usually if someone calls me sweet, I will punch them. But you’re allowed to do it, okay? You’re adorable.”

“Me? Adorable?” He giggled into her hair, his voice sounding muffled.

“Yeah, you! You’re totally adorable!”

“You’re m-making me blush…”

“Good. Listen, not only are you adorable, I will fight anyone who says otherwise. Or if anyone says or does anything bad to you ever, I will fight them. Okay?”

That was so sweet, he could feel tears pricking at his eyes. “P-please don’t fight anyone…”

“I’m gonna fight everyone,” she whispered in his ear, sending sudden shivers down his spine. “Everyone except you, because like I said… you’re adorable.”

That was it – he wanted to just marry her on the spot. He might even have asked to right there and then, if Nathalie hadn’t opened the mansion front door at that exact moment, causing them to spring apart rather suddenly.

“Adrien, you’ve been out there for far too long, you’ll get ill! I let you have your fun and I won’t tell your father, but it’s time to have dinner now…”

He reluctantly got to his feet. “Alright, I’ll come inside, thank you Nathalie…”

“I’ll go get a towel to dry you off again.”

Nathalie went back in and shut the door. Adrien couldn’t help but wonder if she was leaving him plenty of time alone with Alix on purpose because she had figured out what he was up to… he wouldn’t put it past her.

“I should probably go home now,” Alix said. “But remember what I told you. You’re adorable, and I’m gonna fight everyone.”

He started giggling again, shivering from the cold now that he wasn’t sharing her body heat. Or perhaps that wasn’t the cold he was shivering from…

She gave him a goodbye hug, so tight that he was sure he heard his joints crack a little. He hugged her tightly in return, lifting her slightly off the ground. It took them a while to let go, and once she had gone it took him a while to stop smiling like an idiot.

He turned to see Nathalie there again, watching from the doorstep with a rare smile on her face. Yep, she knew alright.

At some point before the next skate date, Adrien had been down to visit Marinette and Alya in their flat. He was proud to see that they had adopted a little black cat who they named “Adrien”, though it did get a little confusing when both Adriens were around at the same time. Plagg constantly insisted that the cat should have been named after him instead, but Tikki reminded him that she didn’t have any actual ladybugs named after her, nor Trixx with foxes, so he shouldn’t take it too personally.

On the way back home, allowed to walk freely down the streets as a normal citizen for once without his bodyguard hulking over him, he spotted Alix. It was strange seeing her someplace other than the courtyard in front of his house, almost like he’d forgotten she actually had a life outside of their frequent meetups despite her always telling him about it.

“Oh, hey Adrien!” She waved at him from the distance and then…

Was she gliding?

Just zooming across the ground towards him, without even needing to take a step?

“W-what… how…”

“They’re just Heelys,” she chuckled as she came to a stop in front of him. “Shoes with a hidden wheel on the underside so you can skate wherever you want.”

Bending down, she took off one of them and showed him. Sure enough, there was a little wheel right there, unable to be seen from the normal angle.

“Are they hard to use?” Adrien asked her.

“Nah, they’re super easy to get the hang of. I should get you a pair too!”

“Then I could trick people as well. I thought you were flying or something, like some kind of… ethereal… angel…”

“Angel? I’m literally dressed all in black!”

“Well, I can’t tell if you looked more like an angel or a demon. But definitely some sort of ethereal being.”

“Awesome. So yeah, should I get you Heelys, then?”

He quickly shook his head. “I can buy them myself, it’s alright, you don’t have to–”

“Nope, I’m buying them for you. In fact, I’ll just tell you right now that Heelys are going to be your birthday present. So don’t buy any before then.”

“Alright then. I’ll look forward to it! And what should I get you for your birthday?”

“It doesn’t matter because you’ll never be able to outdo the hologram pocket watch. But concert tickets to see Jagged Stone would be nice.”

He knew perfectly well he would be able to get hold of those easily. “How many tickets? Is it just for you, or…”

“Two. One for you, one for me. Obviously.”

He tried to reply, but… did she just do what he thought she did? Invited him for a birthday concert date? Just the two of them? Their skate dates were one thing, but actually going elsewhere to places together, especially things like concerts, and especially on special occasions like birthdays… it just seemed kind of… romantic.

“I… yeah… I’ll… I’ll get the t-tickets…”

“And I’ll get the Heelys. Anyway I’m late for work – I’ll see you soon!” She grinned and gently punched his arm, then skated off on her Heelys.

Angel, demon… whatever she was, she was amazing.

The seventh skate date was fun, as usual. She had asked if he wanted to go and visit the museum with her afterwards, and he had wanted more than anything to accept, but unluckily his schedule was completely full that day so he had to decline. It just seemed so unfair that even as an adult, it felt like he didn’t have much control over his life. He was always at the mercy of his strict schedule, and by extension, his strict father.

Or so it seemed.

“Adrien, your schedule for this afternoon has been cancelled,” Gabriel said as soon as Adrien came inside. “You are free to do as you please for the rest of the day.”

Adrien looked up at his father, standing up there at the top of the steps, unable to believe his ears.

“Father, thank you so much! But why…?”

“Nathalie has informed me that your friend would like to show you an exhibit at the museum, and I feel that it would be an informative experience for you. You may go if you want.”

“I certainly will – thank you!”

No point wasting any time. He dropped all his skating kit on the floor and ran back out of the door, through the courtyard and onto the street where he managed to catch up with Alix.

“Adrien? Everything okay?”

He leaned over to catch his breath. “Father… cancelled schedule… I can go to the museum with you after all…”

“Nice! Why did he do that though? I thought you said he’s always really strict!”

Adrien shrugged and didn’t say anything, though he had an inkling. Since Nathalie had clearly been spying on them enough to know Alix had asked Adrien to the museum, she and Gabriel were probably setting those two up on purpose. Well, Adrien was not complaining. This was great!

Their museum date did not last too long, as the museum was closing fairly soon and since Alix was already notorious for sneakily staying behind after hours, security was keeping a very close eye on her to make sure she definitely left before the doors shut. It was fun while it lasted, though, wandering around with their arms linked up, getting to look around at everything that she had told him about during their skate dates.

“We need to hang out like this more often,” she told him at the end, once security had finally kicked them out to lock the doors. “I don’t just mean skate dates. I mean… actual… well…”

Actual dates. If only he had the time for more of those.

“I’ll try,” he promised. “If my father lets me off more, I definitely will. Speaking of my father, I should probably get home for dinner now…”

“I’ll see you soon then. Thanks for coming along.”

They shared their usual goodbye hug – which Adrien noticed had progressively been getting slightly longer each time. By now it was somewhere in the vicinity of 3 minutes, perhaps a little longer. At this rate they would practically be living in each other’s arms by Christmas…

It was quite a nice thought.

The eighth skate date was interrupted by a skype call from Kim, who insisted that Alix and Adrien should race each other while he watched through the screen with a bucket of popcorn. Alix won fairly easily, being the better skater by far, but Kim told Adrien to keep trying until he had finally beaten her. It took at least an hour, and both of them were exhausted by the time Kim finally disconnected, laughing and boasting that he could have done much better.

Adrien sat down against the courtyard wall, chugging as much water from his water bottle as he could manage without choking.

“Ignore Kim, it’s easy for him to show off when he’s just chilling at home not doing anything,” Alix said, sitting down beside Adrien and putting a comforting arm around him. “You did well.”

“Thanks.” He put the water bottle down and rested his head on her shoulder. “Though since I did manage to win at least one race against you, do I get a prize?”

“Sure, what do you want?”

“Hmm… how about a picnic tomorrow?”

She laughed and ruffled his hair. “Jeez, you’re so nice, it’s the best thing ever. Back when Kim challenged me to stuff all the time, the loser always had to do some stupid forfeit and the winner would get money or chocolate or something. But you just ask for a picnic? Dang, I should have hung out with you more often back at school.”

“Well at least you’re making up for it now, right?”

“Yeah. I’m glad I am.”

They rested together, leaning on each other, for long enough that they didn’t get back to skating that day at all. Adrien realized that he had never before had someone he was so comfortable with when it came to physical contact – even he and Ladybug tended to leave it be at fist bumps and the occasional hug, especially in the past few years. Yet now, here sitting in the sun with Alix, he could stay like this forever and never feel like moving…

It had happened so gradually he hadn’t even noticed until now just how close they had become. It hadn’t even taken very long. Evidently their years of knowing each other at school had somehow given them a head start. And the only other people who he was this close with knew his big secret, the fact that he was one of the iconic Parisian superheroes often saving the city…

Was it time to tell Alix this too?

The picnic date in the park the next day did not go on for very long before an akuma attack occurred. Though attacks were less frequent these days, they still did happen, and apparently had really annoying timing. Adrien managed to get away on some excuse and transform into Chat Noir, joining Ladybug in the fight against the villain, who seemed to be attacking mostly with books.

“Use your Cataclysm to distract him!” Ladybug said. “Then I’ll go get the bookmark – I bet that’s where the akuma is.”

“Fine…”

“Chat, you alright? You seem…”

“Grumpy,” he muttered, crossing his arms. “Yes, I’m grumpy.”

“Is everything okay?”

“This akuma just had to turn up right now, didn’t it? Not when I was in the middle of some boring photo shoot or something, but when I was on a date?”

Ladybug turned to him, her mouth hanging open in surprise. “Oh my gosh, you were on a date? With who?”

“Well it’s not really a date, just a kind of hangout, I don’t really–”

“I bet it was Alix! It was, wasn’t it?”

He wondered if he was blushing under the mask. “How did you know?”

“You keep talking about her, it’s not hard to figure out. Anyway don’t worry too much about this attack, I can handle it. You’d better get back to Alix before she figures out your identity. I made that mistake with Alya, remember? Just use your Cataclysm and get out of here, I’ll sort out the rest by myself.”

“Thanks, Ladybug.”

Leaping into action, he distracted the villain with his destructive powers. As soon as he saw Ladybug sneakily taking the bookmark, he ran straight back to the park to find Alix.

“Oh good, you’re safe!” he called, seeing her peeking out from behind a nearby building in an alleyway.

“Chat Noir?” She stepped out of the alleyway. “Hey, have you seen Adrien? He was around here somewhere, we were on a picnic date and I have no idea where he went…”

So she was calling it a date too? He ignored the warning bleeps his ring was giving him and scooped her up into his arms. “It’s not that safe here, the Bibliovile might see you. Let’s get you out of here.”

“Your ring, it’s making that noise, you’re gonna detransform–”

“Don’t worry about it.”

He took her through the alleyway until they were quite a way off from the villain, unable to hear him rampaging anymore. His ring bleeped urgently again, but he still ignored it.

“Seriously, you’re gonna detransform, you should probably hide or something,” Alix said. “Sounds like you’ve only got like a minute left.”

It was jarring how differently she was treating him now that he was Chat Noir. Her voice lacked its normal warmth and had reverted to the monotone she reserved for strangers. Despite the fact that he was still carrying her in his arms, she was barely even holding onto him, like it didn’t matter to her one way or another. It felt so unusual, so unreal, and not in a good way.

“Really, don’t worry about it,” he said to her. “Just wait. You’ll see.”

“What? Are you showing me your civilian identity or something? It’s okay, honestly, I don’t really care.”

“You will.”

“Um, okay…”

It almost physically hurt to see the indifferent, slightly unimpressed expression on her face, directed at him. He was so used to her smiling, being nice to him… Experiencing how she treated strangers was quite unnerving.

His ring gave a final few bleeps, then its magic gave way and he detransformed back into Adrien.

For several seconds she just stared at him in shock.

“Surprise, it’s me,” he said feebly, wondering what her reaction would be.

“It’s… you…”

“Yep.”

She stared for a few more seconds, completely silent. Then her expression suddenly changed to one of sheer delight.

“So you’re telling me – it was YOU this whole time! You’re – you – this whole entire time, you’ve been a superhero – an actual SUPERHERO–”

Bursting into amazed laughter, she threw her arms around him and hugged him so tightly he saw stars.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you sooner!” he said.

“Don’t worry,” she mumbled into the side of his neck, still hugging him. “This is the coolest surprise ever. I can’t believe it… you’re the actual Chat Noir… and there I was thinking you couldn’t possibly get any cooler…”

Feeling a little giddy with relief, he leaned against the wall, still holding her in his arms. She was just so light. Even without the extra strength his Miraculous gave him when he was transformed he could pick her up easily.

“I thought it was time I should tell you,” he said. “Since we’re…”

Friends? Best friends? It seemed too limited at this point.

“…so close,” she suggested, lifting her head away from his neck and resting her forehead against his.

“Y-yeah, close…”

They really were close, quite literally, so close he could feel her breath. For the first time he wondered what would happen if he just tilted his head a bit and kissed her. The thought made his heart flutter like it was filled with purified akumas.

He leaned forwards a little, but his nose accidentally bumped against hers. Embarrassed, he leaned back and turned away.

“That was the most cat-like thing ever,” she said, starting to laugh again.

“What do you mean…?”

“Nose boops. That’s a cat thing, isn’t it?”

“I think so.”

“So you really are a cat, and more than just as a superhero!”

He started laughing too, especially when she then pulled his face towards hers and booped his nose again. And again. And again…

The ninth skate date did not even involve any skating, since it was so hot outside that neither of them wanted to do anything. They lazed about in the sun, barefoot, their skating equipment lying untouched next to them.

“So this is your Miraculous,” Alix said, leaning against his arm and fiddling with his fingers. “I remember you having this ring back in school too.”

“You really remember that?”

“Yeah, I just thought you must be a fan of Chat Noir, though. It didn’t even occur to me that it’s actually you.”

“When people asked me about it I just used to say this ring was a special present from my family. I, uh, got the idea from your watch actually.”

She reached into her pocket and pulled out the watch in question, covered in protective bubble wrap.

“You haven’t seen this thing up close, have you?” she asked, carefully unwrapping it. “I mean, you have, but… not since I got akumatized… anyway, you can have a look now.” She thrust the watch into his hands.

“Are you sure?” he asked. “It’s yours… a family heirloom, and…”

“It’s okay, I trust you. Go ahead.”

He pressed the button on the lid, which sprung open to reveal a little blue hologram inside – a lady dressed in historical clothing, holding up a clock that displayed the time.

“Whoa… it’s beautiful…”

“I know, right?”

He closed the lid again and gave it back to her. “Thank you for showing me, but I should give it back quickly in case I break it… considering I have the powers of destruction…”

“You’re no more likely to break it than anyone else,” she chuckled. “But I haven’t really showed it properly to anyone else before so I don’t really know.”

“Wait, really? You haven’t showed it to anyone else at all?”

“Nope, just you. I’ve never really liked anyone so much before.” She rested her head on his arm again. “I always felt kinda like a third wheel with Kim and Max, and I never really knew anyone else very well… except you now… so, um, you’re kind of special to me.”

He gently ran his fingers through her hair. “You’re special to me too…”

“And if you keep playing with my hair like that then I’m gonna fall asleep. Which is a good thing actually, please keep going.”

He did keep going, for so long he felt like he might fall asleep too. Had he ever felt this peaceful before? Relaxing out here in the sun with someone important to him, not even needing to speak, just each other’s company being enough?

The tenth skate date was still too hot for skating, though they did try for a while. They ended up chatting about Adrien’s double life as a superhero, something that he enjoyed being able to discuss now.

“…and I don’t know where Plagg is, he always goes and hangs out with the other kwamis all the time, or just eats cheese and sleeps, but I’ll definitely introduce him at some point.”

“How do you even keep him hidden?”

“I don’t even know! I’m surprised more people haven’t figured out that I’m Chat Noir yet, to be honest.”

“It’s because you act different. When you’re Adrien you’re all sweet and polite and reserved, and when you’re Chat Noir you’re all adventurous and dorky and flirty.”

“Which do you prefer?”

He wasn’t sure he wanted to know the answer, but he needn’t have worried.

“Both are great. I mean, you’re the same person, right? These days you always act like a mix of the two with me anyway.”

“You’ve known me as Adrien for most of my life though, so what about if I started being extra Chat Noir?” He twirled around rather theatrically and gave a bow.

“I can’t even lie, now that I know it’s you, that’s just… adorable…”

“You’ve cat to be kitten me!”

“That one was absolutely pawful…”

“Well I think it was punderful…”

She laughed. “I can handle puns as long as you don’t start calling me ‘princess’ or ‘my lady’ or that cheesy stuff I’ve seen on the Ladyblog.”

“What should I call you then?”

“How about ‘the coolest person ever’?”

“Alright then, ‘the coolest person ever’, Chat Noir is at your service.” He knelt down and kissed her hand before he could think too hard about what he was doing.

But wait… there was some kind of fragrance…

“What hand cream do you use?” he asked, holding her hand back up to his face. Yes, the fragrance was definitely coming from there.

“Hand cream? I don’t bother with that stuff…”

“But your hand smells so nice! Is it perfume?”

“I haven’t worn perfume in like 10 years.”

“It’s like lavender… and something else, I can’t tell…”

“Oh, that! It’s just the handwash we’ve got at home. It does smell good, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah…”

She held her other hand out to him too. “You can, um, keep inhaling it if you want. I guess.”

Was it just a trick of the light, or was she actually blushing a little? In any case, he took both her hands in his and breathed in deeply, feeling his lungs fill with lavender.

Perhaps he should have stopped then. This was starting to feel so romantic and if he kept going then it would be too obvious, wouldn’t it? But more than anything he was just aching to put another little kiss on her fingers, and holding them close like this was so sweet he felt like he was going to melt…

It was a suspiciously long time indeed before he let go of her hands and stood up again. She hadn’t said anything. There seemed to be something left unspoken in the air between them.

And glancing at her out of the corner of his eye, too overwhelmed right not to do anything more than that… she was definitely blushing.

At some point before the next skate date they took a night off to go for a game of bowling together, followed by a movie at the cinema. Afterwards they trudged back towards the Agreste mansion, the dark streets somewhat lit up by the moonlight.

“I love movies like that,” Alix said, holding his hand and swinging it a little as they walked. “Ones without annoying romantic subplots.”

“To tell the truth I love romantic movies,” Adrien said, grinning. “I know they’re cheesy, but…”

“Of course you love them, you’re adorable! I’m just weird, don’t worry. Romance isn’t my thing. And it always reminds me of… well… you know, marriage and stuff.”

Adrien felt a nervous twinge. “Yeah… stressful stuff…”

“Exactly. My dad said I have to marry someone soon. He’s such a stickler for tradition. And if I don’t get married soon, he’ll cut off my inheritance and take the watch back…”

“What? That’s awful!”

“I know!”

“And I thought I was under pressure to get married…”

“You too, huh?”

Adrien nodded, squeezing her hand a little tighter for reassurance. “My father keeps insisting I marry someone from a wealthy, respectable family so that it’s good publicity for his company. Chloé and Lila are out of the question, and, well…”

He trailed off, realizing he might have given away a little too much.

“That must be so annoying,” Alix said. “I guess at least my dad doesn’t care too much who I marry as long as I’m happy with them… which is… nigh-impossible, if I’m honest…”

“Really? Why?”

“Like I said, romance isn’t my thing,” she muttered, looking at the ground. “And that seems to matter to other people so much. Like, I know I care about people! Maybe I don’t get crushes or dream about making out or settling down with someone, but I can still love people. But I don’t know if anyone would ever agree to spend their life with me if I wasn’t in love with them the way I’m supposed to be.”

He stopped and turned to face her directly, taking her other hand in his too. “Alix, I promise you could definitely find someone who would agree to that! You’re so awesome, anyone would be lucky to have someone like you!”

“Thanks,” she said, smiling a little. “I do hate the idea of having to get married just for the sake of it, but if I was close enough friends with someone and cared about them enough then I probably wouldn’t mind so much. I’d get to hang out with them more that way, right? I wouldn’t even mind doing all the cheesy, stereotypical romantic stuff if that made them happy. Well… with exceptions. Which is what no one would agree to.”

“I’m sure there are lots of people who would be fine with all of that!”

“Exceptions, Adrien, the kind that no one will be okay with. Mainly, no kids. Or at least I’m not having them, nor ever doing anything that might accidentally lead to some. If my future mystery spouse really wants kids they can go get some from the orphanage and go pay to have their fun elsewhere. I’m sorry, it just all sounds too gross to me and I’m not comprising. I’ll gladly look after a kid or two as long as I don’t have to help make them.”

“Wait… you feel that way too?” Adrien said, relief flooding through him. “I thought I was the only one!”

“You too? Oh thank god!” She jumped forwards and enveloped him in a hug, which he gladly returned.

“You’ll find someone,” he said. “You won’t have to give your watch back or settle for less. You’ll definitely find someone, I promise.”

“Yeah, you’re right… and you’ll find someone too…”

Should he say what was on his mind? He hardly dared to, and yet…

“I think I have found someone,” he said quietly. “But I’m not sure.”

She reached up onto tiptoes and breathed into his ear, “I think I’ve found someone too.”

So close, he could smell the lavender handwash, feel her hair tickling the side of his face, his hand just resting over the bare strip of skin on her waist where her t-shirt had lifted up…

He could tell. He could just tell. They were both thinking the exact same thing. The question of a marriage between them hung over their heads, unaddressed.

It must be so obvious to her that he had asked her to teach him how to skate just to get to know someone else from a rich family. And it was obvious to him that she was being overly nice because she wanted to show him she cared, even if it wasn’t exactly the passionate kind of love that was expected from relationships.

The most obvious thing, though, was that it was now apparent that they had both wanted to marry each other from the beginning.

He might even have said something about it, if he hadn’t got an annoyingly ill-timed phone call from Nino at that exact moment, putting an end to the pensive moment.

The eleventh skate date was filled with more conversation about superheroes. Adrien always loved talking about this side of himself, considering that he had gone years without having anyone to discuss it with. The topic soon turned to Ladybug.

“I do know her secret identity,” Adrien said, “but I really can’t tell you. I mean, I’m sure she wouldn’t mind you knowing, since you know I’m Chat Noir, but…”

“It’s okay, if she wants to do it she’ll tell me herself,” Alix replied.

“And for the record, I know everyone in Paris thinks Ladybug and I are a couple but we’re actually not. I swear. We were into each other for a while in our teenage years but things worked out differently and she ended up with someone else.”

“Oh yeah, I remember at school everyone could tell you had a crush on Ladybug.”

Adrien couldn’t help blushing. “Was I that obvious?”

“Yep. I’m super bad at noticing this stuff and even I can easily tell when you have a crush on someone.”

He quickly looked away when he saw that she was smirking at him. She knew, didn’t she? She knew perfectly well he liked her! He wasn’t even sure whether he wanted her to bring it up, or whether that would be too terrifying a conversation to deal with right now.

“So anyway,” she said, “should we get back to skating now?”

Adrien nodded, feeling both relieved and a little disappointed at the subject change. He knew he should probably actually do something, like tell her how he felt, or otherwise nothing would ever happen! But he had never really been any good at that before, and it was so nerve-wracking…

At the end of the skate date they shared their usual goodbye hug, now somewhere around 5 minutes. It was completely ridiculous, he knew it, but it just felt wrong to let go too soon. These overly long hugs just felt so special to him now.

Just before finally letting go, Alix hopped up and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

“See you later!” she laughed, finger-gunning at him and rushing off quickly.

Adrien simply stood there for several minutes, wondering how she could have made something like that seem so natural. They were both so physically affectionate with each other these days that a kiss on the cheek was not really a big leap, but all the same…

It began raining again during the twelfth skate date. Rather than going inside, Adrien grabbed the old umbrella that Marinette had finally returned to him, and he and Alix sat underneath it together outside on the steps.

“Adrien, I have a confession to make,” she told him. “Years ago, when I was akumatized, I killed you in one timeline. You probably don’t remember it. I don’t remember it that clearly either, but I know that you were trying to protect Ladybug and I… I know it’s not my fault, but I guess I should say sorry anyway…”

“It’s okay, Ladybug’s already told me about it. It’s Hawk Moth’s fault, not yours.”

“I know, it just… still haunts me sometimes…”

The look in her eyes was so unusually vulnerable, like her normal fighting spirit had all drained away. He hadn’t realized it had affected her that much – he had always thought someone like her wouldn’t really be too bothered about what her rather impressive villain self had done. He wished he could help somehow. But how? He couldn’t change the past.

“You can always talk to me about it,” he said finally, putting an arm around her. “I’m here for you.”

She looked almost at a loss for words. “Adrien… I swear… you are the sweetest cinnamon roll in this universe…”

“You’re awesome too, you know.”

“Yeah but seriously… I would do anything for you, okay? Anything.”

The way she was gazing at him in earnest, more emotion in her voice than he had ever heard before… He didn’t even need to think. He just pulled her a little closer and planted a kiss on her nose.

“I would do anything for you too.”

The skies were clear and sunny again for the thirteenth skate date. Once more the two of them sat on the steps, not even bothering to pretend that they were skating.

“My father will be away on the weekend,” Adrien said, “but he said that after our next skate date, um, you’re allowed to stay for the night if you like. Because you love the rock climbing wall and deserve to spend more time on it.”

“Really? Awesome! I will so be doing that.”

Adrien wasn’t even sure how his father had agreed to what was essentially a sleepover, especially since Adrien wasn’t a kid anymore, but he suspected Nathalie may have had something to do with it. Glancing at the windows he tried to see if she was spying on them, but he couldn’t spot her anywhere. In that case she was probably using the security cameras to keep an eye on them.

“I haven’t had a sleepover in so long,” Alix continued. “I’ll be sensible, I swear. It’ll be nothing like… uh, that one time with Kim.”

“The one where you set fire to a tree?”

“That was his fault, okay?”

“Of course it was,” Adrien said, laughing. “He’s so reckless.”

“Yeah, even more than me. But then again, you probably can’t tell. I think I’m just somehow more sensible around you. You’ve been a good influence on me.”

“Oh, thanks!”

She gave his hair a quick ruffle. “Anyway, a sleepover will be fun. Do I need to bring anything? Hey, do you want me to bring some of that lavender handwash you love so you can use it yourself? Or… is it better like this…?”

She was holding her hand up in front of his nose.

“It’s, um… I don’t mind…” He could smell the lavender, but it wasn’t the lavender that was making his heart beat fast.

“Then I won’t bring it. You seem perfectly happy getting your lavender fix from me, so… go ahead… if you want…”

Gently taking her hand in his own, he savoured the familiar lavender scent that would always remind him of her. Just something about it seemed to make his brain fire at twice the normal speed, like he just wanted to sit here breathing in the faint fumes of lavender handwash forever, if only because it meant her hand was so close to him, so dizzyingly close…

Was she going to say something? She hadn’t yet, and he didn’t even dare look at her expression. He closed his eyes and pressed her fingers to his lips.

This was not platonic at all, oh boy, it was very unmistakeably not platonic. Most of their interactions usually fell somewhere along the line between platonic and romantic, but this was not ambiguous whatsoever. He knew if he kept going it would become so clear that she would bring it up, of course she would, and that was so daunting and yet he wanted it so much…

His courage ran out. He dropped her hand and half turned aside, rubbing a hand on the back of his neck awkwardly. “I… um… I was just…”

The next thing he knew, she had grabbed his shirt and pulled him down so he was lying on his back over her lap, staring up at her.

“You were just being adorable, that’s what.”

The sun was in his eyes so much that he could barely see a thing. It didn’t matter though – he could feel her holding his hands up to her face, just like he had been doing, faintly brushing her lips over his knuckles almost like borderline kisses.

She didn’t even have an excuse! Adrien’s handwash was nothing special, and anyway he was sure his palms had been sweaty enough that any trace of fragrance would have been long gone. No, she was doing this simply because she wanted to. Because she cared about him enough.

For what felt like hours he lay there, wondering if there was even any point saying anything. Things were pretty clear even without outright saying it. And things became even clearer when she finally put his hand down and leaned right over him, blocking out the sun enough that he could properly see her face.

Was she about to kiss him? It certainly seemed like it.

The door of the mansion opened suddenly. Adrien sat up at lightspeed to see his bodyguard standing at the door, looking surprised as if he hadn’t expected to see them there. The Gorilla quickly shuffled around them and headed towards the garage, evidently in need of the car.

The moment was ruined now anyway.

“I think I have to go now,” Alix said, clicking open her pocket watch to check the time. “But, uh, I guess I’ll see you on the weekend for that sleepover?”

Adrien nodded, unable to speak right now. They shared their overly long hug, though it seemed strangely superficial compared with the kind of intimacy they had just had going on, and then she left.

The fourteenth skate date also did not involve any skating, since they just skipped straight to the sleepover. Alix spent most of the evening going up and down the rock climbing wall, quicker and quicker every time, adamant on constantly beating her record. She had already beaten Adrien’s by far. After that they had dinner, then built a pillow fort like the responsible adults they were, and even had a bit of a pillow fight.

By the time they were actually ready for bed, they were both exhausted. Adrien had decided to let her have the bed and he could sleep on the floor or the sofa for once. His room was huge, there was plenty of space.

“Goodnight Adrien,” she said, lying on the bed in her pyjamas.

“Yeah, goodnight…”

He wandered over and picked up her hand, lifting it to his face and expecting to breathe the familiar lavender scent… but of course it wasn’t there this time. She was in his house. The scent was of his own boring handwash. Somehow, though, it didn’t deter him at all. They both knew the lavender handwash was just a pathetic excuse.

Suddenly she pulled him down into a hug, right there lying on the bed.

“You can stay here if you want,” she murmured, right into his ear. “I hate sharing beds usually, but occasionally it’s okay. Especially if it’s you.”

“Thanks, that’s really sweet,” he replied, shuffling into a slightly more comfortable position before giving her a kiss on the cheek.

He closed his eyes, ready to go to sleep in a hug for the first time… then opened them again when he felt her giving him a kiss on his own cheek in return.

It wasn’t even a quick one. It was slow, deliberate… and reminded him that this time, there was no Gorilla or Nathalie to suddenly ruin the moment by accident, no one here to interrupt what could be a relationship upgrade. But it could only be a relationship upgrade if he tried to make it one.

It was hard to see in the dark as his eyes weren’t yet accustomed to it. He put a kiss on where he guessed her nose was, and got one in return. Then her forehead, and got two in return…

He was so sleepy he wasn’t even sure what he was doing. Was this even real? Was it just a dream, and he was already asleep? He didn’t know. All he knew was that he was getting his face plastered with little kisses, and he liked it.

His eyes gradually got used to the dark enough for him to see better. He looked down at her and suddenly realized he hadn’t kissed her properly yet, on the lips, and he wondered if he even dared do it. But unless his eyes were tricking him, it seemed like she was looking at his lips too, as if she also was thinking about it…

It was late. He was too tired to think properly. Brushing a few strands of hair away from her face, he pressed his lips onto hers and kissed her softly.

He hadn’t expected it to last longer than a few seconds, but to his surprise she pulled him down even closer, clinging onto him so tightly he could barely move, curling her legs around him, her fingers intertwining with locks of his hair…

When he woke up in the morning he saw that she was already awake, laying there playing a game on her phone. Memories of last night returned to him – did he actually kiss her? Was that a dream? In any case, he felt somewhat embarrassed now that it was daylight.

“Good morning,” he mumbled, “hope you slept well… um… about last night, I just… I was tired and I guess I might have… well, it might have been a dream, but–”

She didn’t even let him finish, she just grabbed his face and kissed him again. “Good morning to you too babe. And nope, it wasn’t a dream.”

It wasn’t a dream… did that mean…

“Are we… together now?” he asked.

“Sure. Let’s be real, we’ve been ‘together’ for weeks already. But I guess you get to be officially my boyfriend now.”

He couldn’t even say anything – he just smiled into his hands, knowing he was blushing hard, and knowing that it didn’t even matter anymore if she noticed that or not.

[iwantthedean]

Angels Among Us

Graphic courtesy of @d-s-winchester.

Sequel to The Demon’s Pet.

Part Three: Return

Word Count: 2060

Pairing: MoC!DeanxOFC

Summary: Dean and Zephaniah’s story continues as he fights against The Mark of Cain taking hold, and she avoids waging war with Heaven.

Warnings: Language, lightly implied smut.

Masterlist

It wasn't terribly long later that Zephaniah once again found herself settling into a new home - as much as she could call any place that. Her studio apartment was tiny, but she made it work. Waitressing again brought back many unpleasant memories and fears, but it was something she would have to deal with for the time being. When she wasn't at the diner, Zephaniah was deep in research. Every religion had its own answer, it seemed, to cure a person of various spiritual afflictions. None of them had a way for her to rid Dean of The Mark, and until she found that, there was no going back. So, Zephaniah covered her tracks as best she could. She kept her old phone in service but powered off so she could check the messages from time to time, but used an new burner in the meantime. She used a false name that she was sure no one would track, had all of her mail sent to a post office box, and warded herself and her apartment like she never had before. Not to say that she didn't miss Dean. Every time she found herself once again the recipient of unwanted attention from a male customer, she thought about Dean protecting her from Xander. Every time she ran from someone she was sure was a demon or an angel, she thought about running back to the safety not only of the bunker, but of being with Dean. The problem of being safe with Dean, was that Dean wasn't safe with her.

 Claiming to be an agent from one agency or another, Dean stood with Sam in the watchman's room at a prison where a man on death row had seemingly disappeared right out of his room without unlocking the door or setting off any alarms.

They replayed the video from the night the man had disappeared, and when the man stopped outside the convict's cell, it struck a familiar cord with Dean.

"Pause that - zoom in," Dean instructed.

"We already tried, can't see the guy well enough to identify him."

"Just do it."

The prison officer complied and zoomed in on the silhouette. Dean knew who that was, and if there was any doubt in his mind, the burning of The Mark on his arm confirmed it.

"You're sure that's Cain? I mean, how do we even track him to find out?"

"We'll get Cas on it," Dean replied. "He's the only chance we have to find Cain."

 Castiel didn't have to look long to find Zephaniah. With her soul holding the key to Heaven, looking for Zephaniah was as simple as finding another way to get to a home you had known all your life.

The diner she was working in now was even more dingy than the one she had been working in when she met Dean as a demon. A thin coat of grease seemed to coat everything in the place, and a fog of cigarette smoke left a stale smell in the air. Castiel was extremely weary of the humans in the place; they were the kind to take what they wanted without permission and not bother to ask forgiveness after the fact.

"What'll it be?" a cross young woman asked him, not even looking up from the order pad she was holding in her hand.

"An explanation," Castiel replied.

Zephaniah lowered the order pad from her view. "Castiel. Why are you here?"

He stood, towering over her small frame. "I came to bring you home, Zephaniah. This is not where you belong."

Zeph stood a little more composed. "I don't belong anywhere. If my life has taught me anything, it's that."

Castiel took her by the arm and dragged her out the front door of the diner. Either no one noticed, or no one cared, and it worried him even more for her. "You belong with Dean. You have no idea what he is up against!"

Zephaniah wrenched her arm from his hold, set her hands against his chest and shoved the angel back. "You have no idea what he is up against! I left for a reason, Cas, not because I just wanted out. Dean and I are not soulmates so the connection between us is nothing that cannot be broken without a great deal of fallout."

All at once, Castiel let out a frustrated growl and pinned Zephaniah against the nearest wall. With his arm across her collarbone, she could still breathe, but she was by no means in a comfortable position.

"Soulmates or not, you two are meant to be tied to one another, Zephaniah Jordan. Dean needs a reason to fight The Mark of Cain, and without you, he is losing that fight. You have two choices: tell me why it is you left, or I will tell Dean where to find you. I know better than to believe you no longer felt safe with him."

Tears filled Zephaniah's eyes; Castiel loosened his hold on her. "You're right. Dean is the only place I have ever felt safe in my life. The truth is, Dean is not safe with me."

As her entire encounter in Heaven with Josiah spilled out between sobs and tears, Castiel began to understand why Zephaniah had taken the opportunity to leave when she did. Dean would never drag her back to a place he believed she wasn't safe, but if he knew that she believed herself to be the problem, he wouldn't stop searching for her.

"Until I can find a way out, please Cas. Promise me you won't say anything to Dean," Zephaniah said, wiping her tears away. "I can find a solution to this. I know I can."

Although Castiel feared the measures Zephaniah would be willing to go to in order to spare Dean from this current predicament, he made the promise and disappeared.

 The call from Castiel as to Cain’s whereabouts came long after Dean would have preferred. The inmate that had disappeared from the prison was dead, Castiel could confirm, along with a numerous list of other males.

“He’s wiping through his entire bloodline,” Castiel announced. “I’m sorry I couldn’t bring better news.”

“Not your fault, Cas,” Dean said. His mind was already reeling with the possibilities. “We just have to track Cain down. Then I’ll do what I have to do.”

“Which is?” Sam questioned.

Castiel didn’t like how this sounded. “Dean, this isn’t –”

“It is the only way. Cain told me this day would come, and here it is now.”

“There’s only one thing that will kill him,” Sam pointed out. “And if you go there, alive or dead, there may not be any coming back from this.”

Dean pursed his lips as he packed his bag. “Yeah. I know. Sam, do your research. Let’s figure out where he’s going next.”

 The shifts after Castiel showed up seemed to drag along. The scumbags hitting on her were relentless, it seemed. Tips were shrinking, and even her co-workers were working on her nerves.

After a particularly difficult shift, Zephaniah clocked out and got in her car. She leaned against the steering wheel for just a moment before pulling out her phone to connect to the voicemail on her old number. Dean hadn’t called in days, but she had several messages saved. Just the sound of his voice could quell the tension over a long day at the diner.

One new message.

Zephaniah’s breath quickened at the automated words. She listened to the time and date stamp and tried to focus on the words that would follow.

“Hey, Zeph. It’s me. I don’t know why I’m calling when this shit keeps going to voicemail, except I keep telling myself that if you didn’t want to hear from me at all, you’d just disconnect the number.”

He knew her too well.

“Cain re-surfaced. He’s killing everyone in his line. He’s got his aim next on this ten-year-old kid who probably doesn’t even know about any monsters or demons or anything. It’s got to stop – I’ve got to stop Cain, or it will never stop. You and I know both know what that means, going into this. So, seeing as how this may be the last message I leave you – I know I’ve said it a million times by now, Zephaniah, but I’m sorry. I’m so sorry that I hurt you. That I gave you reason, ever, demon or human, not to trust me. I need – I need you to know, though, that if things were different … if this was another life … I’d still choose you.”

The message ended then. Zephaniah disconnected from the voicemail line and tossed the phone on the passenger seat. Although she was tempted to listen to the message again, to concentrate on the goodbye that Dean meant for it to be, she ignored the temptation, put her car into gear, and headed for Lebanon, Kansas.

 The fight with Cain left Dean drained, beaten, and wondering where The Mark would take him next. Using the First Blade again, killing with the weapon, it wasn’t the heavy burden he thought it would be. It was a relief. It was the weight of Sam and Castiel and Crowley and Zephaniah and all the lives he lived to save lifted from his shoulders.

It made him long for the time when he was demon, which immediately brought back some of that burden.

“Dean.”

And now he was hearing things. He knew that people under extreme stress often heard things in the voices of the people they needed most. That must have been why he heard Zephaniah saying his name now. He set his elbows on his knees and covered his face with his hands. He concentrated on the stress, hoping that it would bring her voice to his ears again.

“Look at me.”

Dean opened his eyes and she was there. “Zeph?”

“Oh my God …” Zephaniah kneeled in front of him while Dean worked to process that she was really there. Her hands cupped his face ran softly over his arms and torso while she searched for mortal wounds. “I’m so sorry. If I had been here …”

“It still would have happened,” Dean said, taking her hands and pulling them over his shoulders as he snaked his arms around her waist and held her close. “I can’t believe you’re here. Zephaniah, I’m so sorry …”

“No, don’t apologize anymore,” Zephaniah said, her voice thick with tears. “I should have been here. Are you okay?”

Dean held her closer and allowed his own tears to fall. “I am now.”

 In the morning when she woke, Dean was gone from the bed. Zephaniah heard the shower going, so she took the opportunity to wash off the grime from the diner and a night on the road.

Stripping down and stepping into the tub, Zephaniah pressed her body flush against Dean’s back. He had one hand pressed to the wall where the shower head was mounted keeping him balanced as he allowed the hot water to run over his body. Zephaniah wrapped one arm around his torso, placing her hand over his heart.

“I can’t promise that I’ll stay,” she said. “But I’ll be here as long as I can.”

Dean’s hand covered hers, and he nodded before turning to face her. Droplets of water peppered her cheeks as he leaned down to connect his lips to hers.

 Once Zephaniah had found some of the clean clothes she had left behind, she borrowed Sam’s laptop to check her email. It wasn’t something that had ever been a priority before, but since she had dived into the depths of research on ridding Dean of The Mark, the internet and email had become a whole new level of resource to Zephaniah.

Most of the emails she had gotten were junk, but one of them nearly jumped off the screen at her.

From: undergroundanswers@reliquest.com To: zephij@gmail.com

Subject: MOC

Ms. Jordan,

Your recent inquiries regarding a cure for The Mark of Cain have reached my ears. I represent ReliQuest, an underground organization in the business of locating and procuring ancient relics, spells, and the like. I believe that I may have an object and accompanying spell that would be most interesting to you, if you are able and willing to make a trip to meet me in Israel.

Contact me back as quickly as you can, Ms. Jordan. This option will not be available for an extended period of time.

Sincerely, J. Shamayim

Zephaniah wasn’t sure what to think about the email at first; an internet search on ReliQuest brought up nothing. It was the same result for a search of J. Shamayim. Though the message threw up a huge red flag, Zephaniah had reached a desperate level.

From: zephij@gmail.com To: undergroundanswers@reliquest.com

Subject: Re: MOC

Please provide me with a suggested time, date, and meeting place so that I can make arrangements.

Zephaniah.

[anniartist39-blog]

True Loves Kiss 19

Disclaimer: I do not own Miraculous Ladybug, or its characters. ———————————————————— Chapter 19 Ladybug zoomed through the city of lights, swinging from building to building as her thoughts ran through her discussion with Tikki earlier that day... "They were in love" Tikki had said with a gentle smile as she remembered her earlier charge "Okay... s-so... what you're saying is..." "Marinette, not every Miraculous pair has ended up together, and hardly any have truely grown so close." "Wait, are you saying that... i-I'm in love... w-with..." "Only you can truely answer that Marinette." Ladybug stopped in her tracks, processing the memory 'No... n-no it CAN'T be...' she took off again 'no, no no no no NO!!!' she swung her way to the Eifle Tower, 'i CAN'T be in love with... with... THAT STUPID CAT!' And began to climb... 'what about Adrien?' She finally stopped on the top level. She looked out over her city. The wind, softly blowing her hair as she stood still, contemplating over her internal delima... she was so absorbed in thought that she didn't hear the slight padded thump of someone landing behind her. Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder. Startled, she grabbed said hand and forced the perpetrator onto the ground with a serious scowl on her face "Ow... Ladybug?" She blinked, then realized what she had just done "KITTY! OHMYGOSH, I'MSOSORRY,AREYOUOKAY?!" "Woah, woah, easy there" Chat said calmly as he got back up onto his feet "calm down, its just me. Slow down, take a deep breath... good. Now... what's wrong?" She couldn't look at him... after everything that's come to light, she just couldn't... look at him... "I..." she took a deep breath "i th-think I'm-" she was going to be sick "HAVEYOUEVERHADAJOINTDREAM?!" Chat blinked at her, dumbfounded "A... what?" "A joint dream, you know, where... two people have the same dream, at the same time, but really, it's their subconscious entertwining and in reality, they're actually together, just... subconsciously?" "Uhhh..." poor confused little chaton "no... not that i can recall... why? Have you?" Did he not realize their dream was joint? Or could he be hiding the fact that it was with a civilian... even IF that civilian was actually HER "Uh... actually..." Chat looked at her with his head slightly tilted, pure curiosity on his face "i... i think i have... but... i don't known if he even realizes it was a joint dream or not" "If he doesn’t know, then how do you know it was joint?" "Because the last time i saw him, he quoted part of my dream" silence. "And, he himself said that he was quoting his own dream..." Chat still looked as confused as ever "O...kay, umm... so... do you like this guy?" Ladybug began to blush "I-I don't know... m-maybe" "Okay... is it really such a big deal if it WAS a joint dream?" She shot her head up "OF COURSE IT IS!" "Okay, okay. No need to snap my head off..." "I'm sorry, its just..." 'i seriously don't want to tell him about it' "m-my Kawamii, she told me that, joint dreams, are like... extremely rare, and well, only happen when two are so close... like... w-when they're in... l... l-love" she trailes off as she avoided his eyes "So... you think you're in love?" Her blush grew "thats great LB" she looked back to find him grinning the biggest grin he could muster, a light gleam in his eyes "I'm so happy for you... hey, maybe later, once Hawkmoth has been defeated, we could go on a double date" okay... now he was just getting ridiculous "Thats... that'd be kinda hard to do..." "Oh, common... he can't be THAT bad if he has your attention Ladybug" she shifted in her spot uncomfortably, Chat looked perplexed as he tried to figure out his partner "was he a previous akuma?" She shook her head "is he someone we know" she hesitated, then nodded, her blush growing "has he ever hurt you?" She shook her head "do you trust him?" She hesitated again "With everything I am" she replied back, eyes still glued to the floor. His gentle smile grew "Then I'm not sure you have anything to worry about... don't worry, it'll be okay, okay?" She shifted again "Whatifhewasyou?" She mumbled under her breath, but, being the cat he was, he had caught it. His own blush began to grow "Wh-what?" Her face was almost as red as her suit "when..." he cleared his throat "when did you have this dream?" She shifted on her feet "... last night?" His tense shoulders relaxed as his ears stood back up and he began to laugh "wh-whats so funny?" Chat whiped his eyes "while it's sweet to know that you dream about me LB, I guarantee you that it wasn’t a joint dream, as you say" "How do you know?" She pouted as she turned away "Because..." he began, walking up to right behind her "i haven't had a dream about you in two months" she spun around to look at him with blown eyes "What?" She whisper-mumbled "Yeah, uhh..." he scratched the back of his neck "I uhh, actually use to dream about you quite a bit... every night, actually" her jaw was on the floor as he tried to avert his eyes "b-but then, i-I started dreaming about a-a friend of yours- of mine- of... ours..." her breath hitched "Who?" He hesitated for a moment, considering if he should actually say anything... finally he sighed "Marinette" her hands flew to her mouth... he DREAMED ABOUT HER?! and not just HER, as in LADYBUG, but... her, as in MARINETTE! And... for the past TWO MONTHS?! But... wait a minute... FairyGodmother was only last month... "B-b-but... w-what do you mean... two months? Y-you only confessed to her last month" his face was calm and collected as he stepped forward, looking her straight into the eye "I know. I'm not exactly sure when it started, but I guess I've slowly been starting to notice her more and more... she's become one of my best friends. I can open up to her about anything and everything. I trust her, i want the best for her... I love her. Honestly, I think I've subconsciously known for a while, but... it took FairyGodmother for me to finally recognize and realize what exactly had been building the entire time... until then... i had been trying to deny it... i thought my heart belonged to someone else, but... I've never felt the way I do about her, for anyone else... ever. It took kissing her awake for me to finally accept that. To realize that, without a shadow of a doubt, I am deeply in love with Marinette Dupain-Cheng." Tears were starting to form in her eyes "Why?" "What?" "Why do YOU love HER? She’s just... plain, and clumsy, a-and pathetic, she's always running late, she isn't really that pretty, nothing really special, she's a complete nobody, I mean, how could she even COMPARE to a superhero? She’s-" "STOP RIGHT THERE!" Chat ordered sternly. She looked up to find him staring at her as if she had just said the worst thing you could ever think of. "I will NOT have you talking that way about her, Ever AGAIN! Why do I love her? Because I do... i love everything about her. Her laugh, her smile, she's the kindest girl I've ever met. She's not plain... she's extraordinary. She's not pathetic... she's amazing. She's not pretty... she's the most beautiful, wonderful, breath-taking woman i have ever seen. She's talented. She's gifted. She's a true prodigy. She's strong, and proud, but also humble... she has the most dazzling smile, and the most welcoming eyes. She's NOT a nobody... in fact, I'd say she could even give one Mr. Gabriel Agreste a run for his money. Her voice is like an angels, and when she sings... my heart stops. She knows who she is and isn't afraid to show it. And even if she isn't a superhero, she's a hero in her own way... she stands up for others... even against Chloe. She's always trying to do the right thing, and even if she messes up, she works to fix it. She admits to when she's wrong and apologizes to those she may hurt. She always wears her beautiful smile, and when she lets her hair down, its like looking over the Niagara Falls. No, she's not perfect, but then... no one is... and that doesn't matter... i still love her." "Chat" she whispered He had turned away halfway through his explanation. He was surprised that when he turned back around to face his partner, her face was nearly as red as her suit. Just then they heard the all too familiar sound of a beep coming from Ladybugs earings... had she really been out that long? "Your Miraculous is going off" she blinked "Oh, r-right" then she turned on her heels and threw her yo-yo, zipping off without another word. Chat Noir landed on the balcony, surprised to find his Princess asleep on her lawn chair. He smiled as he walked over, bending down, he brushed her bangs out of her face as he placed a single, gentle kiss on her forehead "Mari," he whispered "Princess, time to get up" she pouted as she moaned and turned over on her other side. Chat couldn't help but quietly chuckle... she was just too cute. He stood up to stretch before bending back down and lifting her up, Princess style. She moaned again as she burried her face into his chest. His gaze was soft as he carefully walk them both over to the open skyroof window. Then he cautiously lowered them both inside her room. He placed her in her bed just as his ring gave a warning. Once she was tucked in, he snuck down the ladder, trying to make it to her bathroom before his transformation wore off. A bright green light shown through the room as Chat Noir became Adrien Agreste. He spun on his heels, worried that the bright light would have woke her. He sighed in relief when he saw that she was now facing away from him. "Boy, that was a close one" Adrien reached out and cupped his hand over Plagg's big mouth "Plagg, shhh" he whisper-shouted. Said Kawamii glared at his charge. Once Adrien removed his hand, Plgg sighed "Look kid, I'm tired, and I'm hungry... you stay here, I'm going down to the kitchen to grab a snack" before the boy had a chance to protest, the chaotic-being had phased through the floor door. "Psst... hey, Tikki..." Adrien's anxiety spiked when he realized that Plagg was now gone. Frustrated he pinched the brim of his nose and sighed "you better not get yourself caught Plagg" he muttered under his breath. Marinette let out a small moan as she shifted in her sleep. He looked up to see her framed in the moonlight shining through her skyroof. He smiled 'she's beautiful' her hair was let down, a small strand had fallen in her face as her lips barely parted. Je stared at her lips... he wanted to kiss her, but he didn't want to wake her. He looked away, trying to district himself from hos own thoughts, when his gaze landed on her desk... almost all the pictures of him as Adrien had been taken down and neatly piled together. And right beside the pile, her drawing journal was open. His breath caught when he saw what she had been drawing... it was him, as Chat, with beautiful Golden hair, and vibrant, deep, cat-like green eyes... it was so detailed, it looked like she had either had him pose for it, or had looked off a picture to get the shading JUST right... but upon further inspection, he couldn't find a picture 'did she... draw this based on memory?' He looked back to see she had turned to face him, but she was still fast asleep. He smiled at the little sleeping Beauty before him as he slowly made his way back over to her. His eyes were soft as he gazed at her lovely, sleeping face, reminding him of their first kiss. Gently, he leaned down, and kissed her "I love you" Adrien whispered to the still sleeping girl "Hey, Kid" Plagg whispered loudly. Adrien ignored him, Plagg rolled his eyes "look, I know you want to, like, stay here all night or whatever, but unfortunately... you can't. One, you are currently NOT Chat, and if she woke up to find... you... in her room, leaning over her, looking at her like she’s your whole world... fortunately for you, it wouldn't end pretty. Second, you have a shoot tomorrow morning, and I'm NOT having you get in trouble for falling asleep on set again... need I remind you what happened the LAST time tou fell asleep?" The Kawamii crossed his arms. Adrien sighed as he stood up and walked to the bathroom with him... just because it didn’t wake her before, doesn’t mean it wouldn't this time. Chat Noir came out of the bathroom and walked back over to her desk. He glanced back at the drawing and gave a soft smirk, before reaching into his back pocket and pulling out a single red rose, placing it down beside the undisturbed journal. Then he made his way back to the skyroof window. But before he opened it, he leaned down once more, gently brushed her bangs out of her face, and kissed her forehead. When Marinette woke up the next morning, she found the rose along with a small note 'Not even Briar Rose could compare to your Beauty Princess' It was signed with a heart that had been made into a paw print... she blushed as the small smile grew on her face... 'Stupid cat'...

[nattiebump23]

TheImperfectEverything

This is the first time I have ever made a "blog post" I am not used to writing down things that interest me or the experiences/event in my life. Today I feel like I should express how I am feeling because it is something I never do and thought might make me feel better..here it goes I guess.

I am a wife to my husband of four years this year but being together for 10. He is truly my best friend and the man of my dreams, but let me tell you it is not easy. There are many times where I have felt put down by him or by an argument we had. There have been moments when I do not feel loved becuase of what ever reason it may have been at that time. Do not get me wrong, he is an amzing husband and a wonderful father, none of those aweful moments anount to how much love I have for this man, but on days like today I feel defeated. Not just because we had our 7th dissagreament for the day and he is currently sleeping on the couch, but also because I decided to work out for the first time in a few years(that was hard to say) I decided I didnt want to have a heart attack before I turned 30. I started to watch workout videos and decided which one I would try to accomplish I went in with my head held high and my music blaring only to be extremely out of breath and feeling like I was going to pass out before even getting half way through the program. I laid on the kitchen floor in tears from the year of damage I had done to my body. I was not ready to face the fact that I was overweight and struggled to do a simple pushup anymore. It pained me to not be able to finish something I could have easily done if I hadn't kept having oreo breaks when I was stressed.

Not only did that happen today but my three year old decided to have a melt down in the grocery store with what felt like hundreds of people watching and just waiting for me to snap. By the time we had made it to the car and I had unloaded groceries I come back to buckle my sweet baby angel in her car seat and found her soaking wet from just peeing in her in pants. I know typical shopping trip as you mama's out there know.

To add onto the list of things that went wrong, I had realized I forgot a few things that I really needed from the store like dish washing detergent for the pile of dishes that loaded my sick to the point that I was seriously thinking might make it fall through. I blamed my daughter for being the reason behind my forgetfullness for screaming and throwing her self on the floor when she ate her last yogurt raisin and I told her she couldnt have anymore. The drama in that moment made me want to leave everything in the store and come back later when her father could keep her at home while I shopped, but no I decided to prevail and get her some grapes to hold her over. With that being said I completly forgot the few things I needed just to get out of the store quicker, and I completly handed the fault over to my toddler. What a horrible mother I am for putting the blame on a three year old who had no idea how to write a grocery list and just needed a nap. There I was again feeling defeated and alone again.

As I look back on my entire stressful day I try to remember the good things about today. If I had never taker my daughter grocery shopping today we would have never had that hilarious moment together zooming down the isle way while she was in the cart and I was running pushing it faster and faster just to hear her sweet giggle that brings joy to my heart everytime I hear it. If I had never forgot the few things at the store that I asked my husband to grab on his way home, he may not have picked chocolates up for me(his way of making amends, totally fine with it) If I had never tried to work out this morning I would keep pushing it off until "tomorrow" and become more overweight than I am from being so stressed and anxious about not even trying.

I had so many things go wrong today but also had so many things go right when I truly realize how blessed I am in my life. Things may go terribly wrong and you may feel so put down or defeated like I did today, but always push through to find the good in everything. Its so worth thinking about the special moments at the end of the day rather than dwelling on everything that went wrong. I could easily be sitting on my couch drinking wine and eating cheese but chose to sit and remember everything good that happened. Its so corney sounding I know but trust me this has worked for me so well and I hope it will help you too.

[datblog16]

The Bigger Picture

Matthew 10:39 - "Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it." 

John 18:1-12 - "When he had finished praying, Jesus left with his disciples and crossed the Kidron Valley. On the other side there was a garden, and he and his disciples went into it. Now Judas, who betrayed him, knew the place, because Jesus had often met there with his disciples. So Judas came to the garden, guiding a detachment of soldiers and some officials from the chief priests and the pharisees. they were carrying torches, lanterns and weapons. Jesus, knowing all that was going to happen to him, went out and asked them, “who is it you want?” “Jesus of Nazareth,” they replied. “I am he,” Jesus said. (and Judas the traitor was standing there with them.) When Jesus said, “I am he,” they drew back and fell to the ground. Again He asked them, “Who is it you want?” “Jesus of Nazareth,” they said. Jesus answered, “I told you that I am he. If you are looking for me, then let these men go.” This happened so that the words He had spoken would be fulfilled: “I have not lost one of those you gave me.” Then Simon peter, who had a sword, drew it and struck the high priest’s servant, cutting off his right ear. (the servant’s name was Malchus.) Jesus commanded Peter, “Put your sword away! shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?” Then the detachment of soldiers with its commander and the Jewish officials arrested Jesus. 

Above is an important event in the life of Jesus that we've heard about so many times. But, I'd like to focus on a particular person here, and that person is Peter. Peter is one of my favorite people in the Bible. I think the reason I like Peter so much is because I feel like, more than any other person in the Bible, I can relate to Peter the most. When it comes to his relationship with Jesus, more so than any other disciple or apostle, I connect so much more with Peter’s attitude, and that rings true for this particular episode in Peter's life. 

You have these soldiers led by Judas on their way to arrest Jesus and the disciples. Jesus already knew this was going to happen, so he steps out ahead and meets the soldiers. Jesus then asks the soldiers who they’re looking for, as if Jesus was really clueless. 

By this time in Peter’s life, he has already let go of his fishing net and he had been with Jesus for the past 3 years. Three years prior, Peter had let go of his plans and ambitions, and dedicates his entire life to following this random stranger, this Jesus, who is believed to be “The Messiah” Peter sees miracles being performed, experiences signs and wonders, sees the large crowds gather, and the potential that Jesus has. 

What he believed to be the plan of Jesus now isn’t adding up. Now, things aren’t exactly going according to that plan. What’s more interesting is that though he initially let go of his net, somewhere along the way, he picked up a sword. Peter still did not understand.  

Maybe years ago we gave our plans to Jesus. We said, “Jesus, I give my life to you - I’m laying down my plans - I’m letting go of what I want - and I’m ready to do what you want.” So we lay our nets down. But somewhere along the way, we pick up another plan. When we realized that God’s plan was not exactly going the way we desired, we pick up a plan that we believe is better and right, or at least that’s what we tell ourselves. But it was never God’s plan, it was our plan - we decided to take things into our own hand. 

Essentially, we are saying, “God, I don’t know if you really know what you’re doing here, so let me just help you out.” 

We have to let go of the concept that what God wants to do in our life is just about us. 

What is actually happening in this scene we’ve read about? 

God himself has come in the flesh, not just to live, but to die on behalf of all of humanity, to redeem them from the power of sin and death so that all who receive his sacrificial death can be forgiven once and for all. He who knew no sin is about to become sin so that we could have a right relationship with our Creator God, so that we could be with him in heaven forever and forever.

Oh but Peter has no idea what is going on right at that moment! If only we could talk to Peter in that moment, we would say, “Oh Peter, what is happening right now is not about you, its about the whole world, and not just the world now, but the world for generations to come. And here you are swinging your little sword trying to “save” the God of the universe. Peter what are you doing??” 

Peter says, “But I’m just trying to help Jesus, I don’t want him to die. It’s not time for him to die. We still have to overthrow the Roman government, he still has to become the king, that hasn’t happened yet.” 

Peter you think this is about you - you think this is about your plans. But there is a much bigger picture here Peter.  

Peter says, “No but you don’t understand, I’ve left everything, my job, my family, my friends, everything I have known, to follow Jesus, he can’t just go like that, I don’t what we’re gonna do without Jesus - this is not what was supposed to happen.”         

Whats so funny is that we can say Peter was so near-sighted, that he was narrow minded. “Peter can’t you see the bigger picture here??” We can say that only because we know what the bigger picture was - it was about the cross. 

Yet, when we go through those times that don’t make sense in our life, and things aren’t exactly going the way we thought it would go, aren’t we just as myopic? As believers, we have this mindset that our lives are about our story - but thats not true. There is only one story in this world that matters - there is only one story that my life should be about - and its not mine - its His. PERIOD. It’s the story of Jesus and you are living in that story right now - my life, your life, is ultimately to be about him and for him - he made you for himself.

But the moment we think that this story is about us, we get in the way of His story. The truth is that His story is always better. How many times do we get in the way of the story that should truly be written? We get so wrapped up in our circumstances and our situation that we forget that there is a bigger picture and more importantly, a bigger God in your situation. 

What really needs to happen in those moments is we need recover a greater perspective. We need to zoom out and see the bigger view. 

Romans 8:28 - “and we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to his purpose.” 

John 18:11 - “Jesus commanded Peter, “put your sword away! Shall I not drink the cup the father has given me?” 

Peter there is something happening here that is so much bigger than you - what is happening here is about the world and all of humanity to come - so put your sword away and let go of what you think the plan is. 

We have to let go of the concept that what we see is what is happening. In truth, there is another realm on which the supernatural occurs, and God moves in that realm as well.  

Peter thought the enemy was the Roman government. Peter thought the enemy were the soldiers coming to take Jesus away. Peter thought Malchus was the bad guy - which is why he swung his sword. Boy was he wrong - if Malchus was the bad guy - Jesus wouldn’t have healed him. By the way, that must’ve been real awkward for Peter when Jesus healed the guy he just hurt. 

Ephesians 6:12 - “for our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” 

Our battle is not against any man, but it is against the real enemy, the devil. what happens in our life is not all as it seems. There are things happening in the spiritual realm. Peter did not see that. Peter has brought a physical weapon into a spiritual battle. Oh so many times, don’t we do the same? We bring our physical emotions, our worldly view, our intellect into things that have nothing to do with this world. We say, “oh if I hadn’t done that, or if I had just done this."

Peter seems to have forgotten that Jesus, if he had wanted to, could have called a legion of angels to come and annihilate every Roman soldier in the garden at that moment. Peter seems to have forgotten that Jesus is still in control - even though from the outside, He’s the one being arrested. 

How do you know that this was a spiritual battle? When the soldiers came to arrest Jesus, they had physical spears and swords. Yet, when Jesus simply spoke, the soldiers fell down to the ground - something was happening in the spiritual realm here. Who was taking who here? 

The moment we surrender our lives to God - from that moment on we have a target on our backs. We are in a spiritual battle. So what do you do in this situation where things aren’t going as you planned? You trust. What do you do?  You talk to God. What do you do? You rest. What do you do? You let it go into God’s hands. You might feel like you should take things into your own hands, but let go of your sword - and trust what God is doing, because there’s more to the story than what you see now. 

What happened to Peter? Where did his life take him? Did his life turn out the way that he thought it would? Truth be told, if Peter’s life went the way he planned, we wouldn’t be talking about him today. Oh how amazing is the Author of our stories. All we have to do surrender. Drop your sword. 

Never in a million years could Peter have imagined the course that his life would take following that scene in the garden. For Peter, it wasn’t enough to have dropped his net, he needed to drop his sword. We know the rest of Peter’s story, how he became an incredible instrument in the early church, proclaiming the gospel of Jesus, for many years. He saw signs and wonders being performed through his ministry, he suffered, he was tortured, and eventually gave his life for the cause of Christ. 

Jesus predicts Peter’s death in John 21:18-22 - “Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.” Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, “Follow me!” Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following them. (This was the one who had leaned back against Jesus at the supper and had said, “Lord, who is going to betray you?”) When Peter saw him, he asked, “Lord, what about him?” Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.”

In his final hour, as Peter was led to be crucified, as the soldiers came to take him away, I want to believe Peter looked back on that moment in the garden, when the soldiers came to take Jesus away, and he remembered the moment he drew his sword - and he understood now.