#i am just being the annoying lore nerd

[astrxealis]

me rn having the biggest hots for leon kennedy and astarion sorry LMFAOOO <3

[houndsrending]

Im still wondering what the deal was with the joke at the start of peacemaker tries hard about people being mad about lore being retconned (and also how anybody mad is a dumb idiot who doesnt understand how comics work). Like the only people I've ever seen talking about Peacemaker's previous stuff being ignored in a negative way besides ME are people who arent actually interested in the character and just wanted to hate the show because they hate James Gunn (and it is very obvious from the way they talked about it that they didnt actually get who Peacemaker was as a character since most of those people were also convinced he was a serious antihero pre-show which like. Yeah ok.)

I dunno. Still convinced it was making up a guy to be mad at and is part of why I was annoyed with this miniseries from the start. Also because of the fucking sexual assault joke Im not ignoring that.

[minnie-cai]

I had a dream of sleeping over nerd!Arts dorm room, it was storming outside and he refused to let me go walk out on my own I was on hid bed and he was working on something hes reading a book with his glasses low on his nose and was only in a white shirt and sweats where his junk was almost out. I was so horny I just straddled his lap and started going crazy, he ended up shoving my face against his pillow pounding me from behind fucking me while he kept his glasses on <3

𝑰 𝑴𝑬𝑨𝑵 “𝑪𝑨𝑴𝑨𝑹𝑨𝑫𝑬𝑹𝑰𝑬” !

that’s so crazy i actually had the exact same dream last night so here’s something i wrote about OUR dream

not proofread, bless your eyes, it’s 2 am and my eyes are basically shut.

rating ; mature. smut. it’s smut. leave if you’re a minor. or don’t. i can’t stop you. actually i can. i will find you. and take away your phone.

oh nerdy!art my beloved, where he’s the sweetest guy you’ve ever met and he’s stumbling over his tongue awkwardly as he tries to flirt with you but it turns out his tongue was made for bigger things.

and it’s so weird the first time you fuck because you fall next to him on the mattress, out of breath, sweaty and high on orgasms and suddenly, all you had heard about nerdy guys being good in bed was confirmed.

you start dating, he holds your hand around campus sweetly and all of your friends love him. you’d heard the lore of all of tolkien’s writing at least a hundred times as you played with his hair but you’d hear it thousands if he asked. you give him head under his desk as he does your assignment for you and he cums all over his thighs and panics, rushing trying to find a towel or a dirty t-shirt as he babbles apologies and squirms because he hasn’t even properly finished yet.

after a few months of dating, it’s totally casual and normal for you to stay over at his single dorm after you’ve complained about how annoying your roommate was, under the condition, of course, that you’d let him study when he needs to. you promised.

you were lying in his bed, wearing a hoodie he’d lend you after you’d softly fucked with the rain pattering on the window. you pouted and twisted the fabric of the sweater in boredom. art was sweet, sure. he’d made you finish first like a gentleman, cleaned you up and dressed you but you just found it so annoying that he managed to move on to studying right after sex. you stared at him and stared and stared as he sat in his chair, his foot resting on the desk as he read a book he was assigned with his lips lightly agape and his round glasses low on his nose.

the grey sweats he’d thrown on quickly after he got out of bed being a size down from his normal one, giving you the great view that was the outline of his semi-hard cock.

as you’re thinking and just admiring him, you hear him sniff and he swallows, his adam’s apple bopping with the movement. and suddenly, yet again, your panties are wet. what is this boy doing to you?

“artie….” you mewl gently from the bed, your legs twisting under the sheets as you try not to press your thighs together. “is it gonna take long?”

“i wanted to finish at least two chapters by class tomorrow, why?” he mumbles as he moves on to the next page, licking his fingers so that the paper doesn’t stick together but the only thing you can think of is him licking his fingers and playing with your clit as he mumbles compliments against your collarbone.

“nothing… just a bit bored…” you respond as you start to stand up but he just hums, not looking up from his book. when you reach his chair and lean against the back of it with your elbows, moving your fingers to run through his hair, scratching his scalp gently, his head falls back against your chest and he lets out a breathy grunt.

when you moved to straddle his lap, that was his last straw. “you’re kidding…” he mumbles in a soft but raspy voice with a sweet smile when you roll your hips against him. his glasses threatening to fall off his nose and his curls falling messily on his forehead, times like these is when you really take a look at him and realize how gorgeous he is, like he’s trapped a ray of sun inside his eyes.

“huh?” you giggle, almost breaking this innocent character you’d built up. “i don’t know what you mean.” you shake your head with a gentle smirk and furrowed eyebrows, your eyes narrowing as you try your hardest to look confused and hold back your laugh.

“oh you don’t? oh really?” he says with an amused laugh and raised eyebrows. “i- yeah?- rea- really?” he starts with narrowed eyes but he ends with a scoff and a small smile as he realises he wasn’t sure what he really wanted to say and was just stuttering nonsense. “you don’t know what i mean? you want me to show you what i mean?” he chuckles with a sarcastic attitude, looking up at you through furrowed eyebrows.

“i might need you to show me what you mean.” you laugh but it’s cut short by a shriek when art throws you over his shoulder, laughing. “what are you doing?” you cry out as he stands still in front of his twin bed for a second, contemplating before he decides he doesn’t want to throw you on it and gently sets you to sit on the bed. he pauses and folds his arms, looking down at you, the smile not fading from his face. “what are you looking at me for? c’mon, pretty! down and on your belly.” he says, snorting at his own tone.

“down and on your belly? where did you come from? orderin’ me around!” you say surprised by his newfound confidence before following his instructions. “i’m not sure, i like it though.” he replies laughing before settling on the bed, his knees on each of your sides as he pulls down your panties, pulling your hips up, carefully raising them.

his hands hold their position on your hips when he inserts into you, making you sigh shakily. he grunts as he feels the warmth of your walls enveloping him. his head falling forward, his eyes shut.

moments after, he pulls himself back together, pushing his glasses back to the bridge of his nose and moving his hands to push down your back, your body being smashed against the mattress by his warm palms and when he moves to rut into you, you leave out a moan, muffling it with the pillow.

by the time he is close to cumming, full on whines and whimpers fall out through his lips, his thrusts getting quicker as he chases his release. “so pretty… fuck.. ugh- so good…” he babbles and his upper body connects to your back, folding forwards to try and handle the pleasure as you suddenly feel the cold material of his glasses against the skin of your neck which you felt was burning, the sensation making you shudder.

“please, baby… i’m- i’m close…” he blabbers on your neck, leaving small wet kisses against it as his rhythmic pace gets rougher.

when you both cum, whining and moaning like hormonal teenagers and fall back against the bed, he wraps his arms around your head, pulling you into his chest. “that was really, really hot-“ he pauses, taking a long deep breath “don’t do it again.” he finishes and laughs, pulling away to wipe the fog off his glasses with his your shirt.

[ydlmaiki]

🏈1. chapter 🏆

⚠️THIS STORY CONTAINS SEXIST COMMENTS, RACIST SLURS, VULGAR WORDS, SA MENTIONED AND ISN'T RECOMMENDED FOR PEOPLE WHO GETS EASILY OFFENDED⚠️

(hey guys! this is chapter first of my OC Norman lore, and it's about how he ended being an Normie and potential feelings for someone:3)

*beep*, *beep*, *beep*....*"that annoying noise, that annoying noise of my alarm clock that wakes me up every morning Monday till Friday will end out of the window in the pool one day, Ugh fuck this shit."*

Norman opened his eyes and immediately flinched a bit since he still felt tired and completely exhausted from everything, the school, his 'friends', teachers... just everything, finally he tabbed on his alarm with his hand as it went silent, it's loud noise finally quiet, tho he couldn't go back to sleep, he had to stand up, take on clothes and go to school like every fucking day till friday, keeping that repetitive pattern he did since he was 7, great just great, which is what he did, taking on his iconic clothes that he wore everyday until it looked dirty, it was black turtleneck, red sport hoodie which is an merch of the sport club he was part of, some blue jeans he got in a thrift store and sadly had to take contact lenses on his eyes, he would have preferred wearing classes since he looks better in them and without them he feels naked, but he gotta wear them because he would get bullied by his sport "friends" for looking like a nerd, he even decided to go brush his teeth, because he had bit of time before he had to go, the mirror reflection showed the tired 18 year old highschool boy who's ginger curly hair was an mess and it's beautiful baby blue eyes completely tired and pale like the one of a ghost, which Norman didn't paid too much attention to his own appearance as he didn't wanted to impress anyone and didn't cared how he looked like after all because and wasn't trying to impress someone, it's not like he got friends, well he has 'friends' but they're mostly just teammates at sport club because welp, if Norman wanted to play sports, he needed with people, great.

*"Great, can't believe that today I gotta play with those jerks yet again, why am I even with them? I'm anyway getting tired and bored of playing sport slowly and all that those jerks are talking about is how they want to bury their dicks in pussie of the girls at school, ugh great, as if I wasn't suffering enough"*

Norman then finally took on his Adidas backpack and went down the stairs towards the kitchen, noticing his father Ray already there making him school lunch since Norman highschool gives shit ass foods,

"Ah, good morning Norman, how did you slept my little bug?"

said Norman's dad in a warm and deep voice, Norman dad looks a lot different from him, his hair wavy and dark brown woth some grey showing his wise age, the eyes were green and showing lot's of empathy that Ray has, he also has wrinkles on his face, showing how Norman dad is in his 50 and as well as an small beard, he wore an AC!DC shirt that was outworn and some grey sweatpants.

"it's fine dad, just annoyed I have to go there"

*"Why is he asking anyway? like I would somehow feel different in this repetitive annoying ass life, like something magical would happen to change this miserable pathetic life-"*

"I know son, school is an burden to manage, but you're smart and I'm sure you will manage to make it through, even if you're burden out"

*"did my dad just confirmed that school was annoying? I mean, makes sense he has Autism just like me so school is double the hell, I sometimes can't help myself but just tiny bit smile at him, at least dad had some understanding."*

"Yeah thanks dad"

said Norman back to him, taking the basic blue lunchbox from his dad and putting it into his bag pack

Norman then finally got out of his house and walked down the road of the Eltingville, he kinda hated it here, it was small and there weren't many shops that sell some books and the only one that did were miles away and would take him an hour to get there, the only close one to Norman was that Joes Shop that he had heard of which sells comics and not proper literature book's like Kafka or Dostoyevsky or even Shakespeare which Norman was shocked by, since he thought every shop sells Shakespeare's theatre plays, but that doesn't matter now since his main mission is to get to school...

*"Welp, there I'm, back here again in this hellhole of a school between these wanna be popular alpha horny ass jocks and the girls...ugh the girls, they were the worst, some of them were whispering and chuckling about me, talking about my attraction and how strong I'm and sexy while playing basketball, Pleh, absolutely disgusting and horrendous of them to think so dirty of me, like this once an blonde girl with revealing crop top and short skirt asked me out and was even flirting with me! Ugh, I couldn't scream at her or it would ruin my reputation at the school, so I had to sadly kindly decline, tho she was completely furious and annoyed, she luckily left me alone, at least some points for me."*

Norman was walking towards his school in the road, students were around him walking towards their endless suffering of a place called school, luckily there weren't soo many people so Norman was alright with it, but he managed to sometimes get overwhelmed by the people there and the surrounding, luckily Norman make it through the group of people in the hall towards his classroom, sitting down at the complete front desk in the middle since the back was occupied by the sport ass jerks that are his 'friends', preppy girls with huge ass tits that smokes cocks and have face covered in make-up. There were other nerd and normal students, which Norman didn't paid attention to them, since they weren't interesting, expect one group of boys.

*"what do I have as the first class Anyway? oh yeah, the fucking old teacher and biology, I hate how she treats me as this nice gentleman that will be great dad and find an beautiful Wife, well new flash old hag, I'm gay and hates woman, I don't like being around women since I don't know what I should expect from them...will they touch me? drug me and lie? will they lure me and rape me? hah! I won't let that happen like last time with..."*

Norman stopped in his thoughts and sighed, he hated to think of his past when he was vulnerable and abused by the only person he had and yet...."she" broke him, how could he forgave such an gruesome act "she" did to him? he couldn't, and will never forgive for what "she" did to him and so, Norman sight and mentally prepared himself for the class and hoping that the teacher will ignore him

The bell rang as then there could be heard that familiars heels...*clack*, *clack* and *clack* that irritating sound made Norman blood frooze and roll his eyes in pure annoyance, the door opened as the nice looking old lady with glasses, short grey hair and flower dress walked in

"good morning students, I hope y'all won't interrupt this lesson, since I'm having an nice day and a good mood"

said the old teacher with the 'sweet grandma' voice that made Norman just irritated, how can she be this nice but yet still treat him like some straight troublemaker who will get himself wife? ugh, he hated those types of old people....

luckily the class was somehow manageable (it wasn't without feeling bored and annoyed) since the teacher talked about sex system, animals and that we are part of and will expect all of us to have family...expect Norman, he doesn't consider himself as some lower class who will have children and be like average husband/dad, no no, he was MORE then that, he had DREAMS, an REAL DREAMS not wanting to spend the rest of his life focusing on some random girl, fuck her and then have a child and work, no no, he was more.... better then that

making it to another class, and another, and another and another....until it was luckily lunch, an 1 hour break before another one, Norman made his way through the groups of people and sat where he usually sat, by the side with his "friends" can he even call them friends at this point? let's call them rather club members, yeah that's much better, so Norman sat with his club members of 4 boys and 3 girls, which Norman felt uncomfortable by the presence of the girl's, leaning towards the boys like leeches...

*"ugh great, they're leaning onto them like some kind of submissive bitches who are asking for it, great just great!"*

thought Norman to himself and sighed, taking sip of his thermo flask in which he had an warm wild fruit tea, his favourite and his safe drink. Norman pulled out his lunchbox from the bag, opening itbup as there was his safe food, tomato sauce with macaroni and cheese, Norman calls them "Pizza Macaroni" and they're extremely delicious. He loved his dad cooking since he always cooked such an amazing dishes that managed to make Norman happy, meltdown? spicy kung pao, Depressed? an warm cup of tea and simple toasted sandwiches with extra cheese, PTSD attack? simple soft hug and an good old egg chicken rice with spring onion! Ray was just...the best dad ever.

Norman decided to do one of his favourite activities during the lunch break, which was spectating, he doesn't know why but there's something exciting and fascinating watching people talk and just think of how their life works...

*"lets see....ah Emily is talking with her friends as usual, I hear she's talking about food and the trip she was with her parents, what's that? her boyfriend cheated on her? Oh no! how sad, too bad I don't care, let's see someone else hmm, some boys talking about the tournament, some about music bands and fashion..."*

but Norman had noticed by the side on one of the lunch table 4 boy's. Pete with the red hat who was latino-american? Norman doesn't know exactly, Josh the fat ass with glasses and greyish jacket, Jerry the quite "normal" one with an green Jumper and finally....Bill, the nerd with glasses and mustard orange flannel shirt, they're named apparently Comic Book, Science Fiction, Fantasy, Horror, Role•Playing club...geez, that's a long ass name for a club, and they don't even have a short nickname! at least Norman dad back then around the same age as them was part of a club, an Czech Metal Punk Music club, and they had an good nickname CZ•PMP, Norman decided to make himself an nickname for them since he doesn't call them by that long ass name,

the CNC aka Cliché Nerd Club, a name he had created for them some time ago

Norman could notice as the four's were talking about the same stuff as alaways, some Comics and Movie reference, to actors and sometimes there was mentioned of porn, but it wasn't as intense as his Club Members, He couldn't help himself but secretly admire them from afar, how do they manage to just talk about it and not care what other things? Norman couldn't do that, he had held this sport player image since he was kid, he held once a joy by playing sports with his friends as some form of escape from reality, but sadly.... with the puppetry that happened, his club members got worse and Norman stayed the same, until his passion for sport just...vanished, now it feels like a chore then-

"Hey Norman, wanna go and mock those four again?"

*"huh what? Oh yeah, the stupid club n*gga member is talking to me again, He always has some kind of sadistic joys bullying the CNC, don't get me wrong, at first it was fun, but then he made it as some kind of repetitive routine which annoys me because like, how can be your life so boring you have to bully nerds? I'm not any better since I'm literally listening to them talking far away, but hey! this isn't about me after all*"

"Seriously Dave? don't you have like- something better to do then bullying those nerds again?"

answered Norman back in a very specific kind of a tone that screams tired and slightly bothered

"What? I mean cmon, look at those tweets, they're literally asking to be bullied"

*"same with those girls who you fucked yesterday for wearing revealing skirt just because she asked for it huh?"*

is what would Norman say if he didn't had filter and didn't thought it through what to say, but since he had reputation to hold and actually good self control of what he says, he simply shrugged his shoulders like it was just an average day and said

"Eh, I guess you have a point, but you do the whole act I will be just behind"

said Norman, great here we go again.... bullying the CNC for the thousands of time coming right up!

Dave decided to drag his other friend Mark along with him as he was white and an athletic cocky boy, he kinda hated those boys, Norman felt like a sore thumb between them, ginger with blue eyes and wearing contact lenses, greaaat, just great, today's date could NOT get any better!

as the three sport boys arrived by lunch table of the 4 nerds, they were arguing, well expect Norman since he said he will be by by the side, which is what he did and sometimes he said bit loudly at his teammates "yeah get him" or "you're right Dave/Mark" which Norman hated, he didn't wanted to be here, he wanted to go home, read some yaoi manga or Agnes and then jerk to magazines of naked men, not here standing by the side of Dave as he was insulting and arguing with the leader of the CNC, Bill Dickey, which Norman absolutely loved, not in a romantic way but funny way, this guy was entertaining, funny and had good insults sometimes (they weren't, but Norman finds them funny anyway), Heck he wasn't even shy saying full on N*gga onto Dave, this was some business, and Norman LOVED it! Bill then said something about Dave and his family in an insulting way, calling him Fatherless wanna be Jerk that secretly sucks his teammate cocks after game and something about him being slave, which Norman could not help, but let out slight snort, shit.

"the fuck you're laughing about Norman?"

said Mark disappointed and serious, shit, Norman was ruined, but luckily he had a plan as always, he can easily just lie his ass through Mark judging stare and pretend to be just like them

"Oh you know Bill will be fucking dead after he said it"

*"nailed it, now Mark will think I'm smiling because Bill will be so dead after what he said to Dave, I should get an Oscar for being an perfect manipulative liar"*

Mark rolled his eyes and nodded, falling for Norman lie as always, but Dave didn't took Bill words lightly as he decided to add some physical actions, obviously winning since he was taller and stronger but they went far as they weren't just pulling hair and punching, no, Dave started to ACTUALLY choke him to death and Bill was trying to kick Dave off, but failing, shit it's getting serious and Mark is not concerned and the other nerds were trying to pull Dave back of, but Mark was pushing them aside! can't Mark see that Dave is choking that little nerd and will probably kill him?! shit, he had to do something, he didn't wanted his favourite nerd to end up in a nursery and worse dead, digged under ground, who then will entertain Norman without his favourite nerd with a funny lastname and insulting people?

Norman decided to take actions into his own hands and help the little nerd and as well Dave from not ending up in some prison for teens, but he does it more for the nerd, he doesn't care if Dave will be in prison or not. He walked to the lunch table and picked up those plastic and iron chairs that you could flip in one and carry it easily and store them, Norman couldn't believe what he was about to do, since this was like straight up from dream's and intrusive thoughts, suddenly the chair was lifted in the sky and...

*BOOM*

Norman hit Dave onto the back and bit head with the chair as Dave shouted

"Aghhh! Fuck! you stupid ginger cunt!"

Dave shouted and immediately let go of Bill and was touching his back, letting out hisses as Mark helped Dave up on his legs up again

*"Holy shit! I can't believe it, I just hit Dave with an chair onto his back! now that's what I call an perfect move, an solid 8.5 from me! wait- I HIT DAVE?! FUCK! I'M SOOO DEAD!"*

Mark looked at Norman confused and threatening as he then scoffed and walked away with Dave back to the lunch table with the others, while Norman was still in the shock and slight fear of hitting Dave with an chair, an folding one to that.

"What the fuck just happened?"

said Josh confused and looked over at Norman who just processed to save Bill from getting choked to death. Norman looked over at the three nerds and blinked, shit he felt suddenly nervous and confused, he never felt like that much when he did something, but this was.... different somehow, suddenly Bill coughed on the floor and tried to stand up on his legs, but his arms were bit shaky to do so as Norman suddenly helped him up

*"Wait Wait... what am I doing? why am I suddenly helping the nerd up on his legs? the fuck is wrong with me? I usually don't care for people laying on the floor almost dying but him? even with few bruises and small mark left by the choking on his neck suddenly makes me wanna help him? what....why?*"

thought Norman to himself as he found this genuinely stupid and confusing, even Pete, Jerry and Josh looked confused at Norman for helping Bill up on his legs

"the fuck you're doing you jock faggot? get off me you arrogant normie"

groaned Bill out and looked at Norman confused as he was obviously beaten up, face covered in bruises and an slight forming black eye as Dave did gave him punches, his hair an mess from pulling as well as his clothes was mess and by the neck tore a bit from Dave pulling it, shit.

"Holy shit Bill...that jerk really got you man"

said Pete and Looked between Bill and Norman, no one said anything much since they all were shocked from what just happened, Norman sighed and looked over at his table at his club members and realised he was FUCKED, now they weren't staring at him like an old pal, they were staring at him like vultures, ready to jump on him and beat him to death, which made Norman just a bit scared and have an horrified expression on him

"Uhhh hey Norman right? thanks for what you did but....why did you do it? thats like....not something normies like you do"

said the meek Jerry as Norman was frozen and didn't answered, still holding Bill shoulders as Bill just gave up trying to move off Norman, No, No No...his reputation, his career his...fame! it's in ruins! now he will be seen as the disappointment of the only thing he was good at, on this school! how did he messed up so badly?! but...why did he felt bit relieved by that?!

"Hey traitor!"

shouted one of the blonde girl's who wore blue jeans and red crop top as she was walking closer to Norman, she then thrown Normans Adidas backpack at the floor, the backpack did an *squish* sound as it fell down on the floor, it was covered in some kind of white yogurt...this was the start of a war, and Norman knew there was no way out of it no matter what he did.

"Maybe next time consider what the fuck you're doing loser! and don't you dare return back between us, you traitor and now..."

the girl reached her hand for Norman to hand over his hoodie

"the hoodie, give it back now"

which Norman slightly frozen at the gesture, damn that was...shit, he was speechless and didn't knew how to react, but then he slowly took off his hoodie and handed it to the girl as she snatched it off his hand

"You're not welcomed with us Norman, go and sit with the nerd loser's now!"

with that, she chuckled and walked away with Norman's red hoodie since it was an merch of the club.... Norman was silent, devastated, terrified and scared, he should feel hate, he should feel fury towards the nerds for helping them but...he didn't, he didn't felt nothing towards them, only to himself, he felt...glad he helped them?

"Whoaw, you really saved yourself there you normie for what? for some pity and praise from us? how pathetic"

murmured Bill at Norman as he didn't answered immediately, instead he turned at Bill and looked... shocked and glad, why? even Norman doesn't know, but one thing is for sure, he doesn't have to hang out with his ex-club members anymore, but now he has to protect himself from potential bullying from his ex-club members

and so, Norman swallowed and said:

"I don't know, I....I genuinely don't know exactly why I just did that"

explained Norman shocked and looked over at Bill who was somehow still standing and breathing bit harshly from the fight

"but.... maybe go to nursery man"

he said bit worried as well as glad sort of tone and looked down at his bag that had yogurt on it, great, that's well, great. Norman then took his bag by the sleeve and raised it up in his arm like an lady carrying her purse carefully not to get dirty by the yogurt and then proceeded to just walk away like it was an average Thursday.

another two classes were over as Norman walked home with the bag dragging it down, Luckily he managed to get rid of the yogurt during an break but it was still bit dirty and smelled badly, so he would have to clean it in a washer or by hand, but Norman was too overwhelmed and didn't had time to clean it by hand and so, as he arrived home he pulled out all the stuff and put the bag in the washer and turned it on, his dad told him how to do dishes and different kind of house chores, so he had an idea how to manage washer easily

*"Ugh, I can't believe I just hit Dave in the back with the chair, what did I thought would have happened huh? that they won't get mad at me and will accept me back with open arms like nothing happened? bullshit, you're not in a fairytale Norman, this is reality and now everyone will be an dickhead towards you*"

are thoughts that ran in Norman head as he cleaned his school notebooks and pencil case in His wardrobe where he stores school stuff

Norman room was bit of a mess and like an dumpster, clothes on the floor, old TV by the bed on a pile of boxes, old wooden drawers, bed, bookcase as well as table as he had an alright computer as well as blue poor punching bag by the corner.

His room wasn't something out of disney shows, more like the room of your average teenage boy who's into sports and classic literature

Norman sat down on the bed and let out sigh, he felt absolutely overwhelmed and devastated, but then someone knocked on his door, and he knew it was only one person:

"Linda, what do you want?"

Linda was Norman older sister by 5 years as she was 23 unemployed woman who still lived with her dad and uncle Because she couldn't find an useful house or apartment that she wanted to live in.

The door opened as the tall woman leaned against the doorframe with a smirk, her dirty blonde hair short in a some sort of short wolfcut and her green eyes glazing in mischief.

She wore an marvel thrift shirt and some black shorts, her legs and arms unshaven since she doesn't care for hygiene and thinks that woman who shave are scared to embrace their feminity

"Well hello there little leach, I noticed you put something in the washing machine, did you got in another fight and ended with dirty boxers?"

she laughed at the joke and Norman sighed

"No I didn't, I just got kicked out of the sport club, so they got my school bag dirty"

Linda was shocked and blinked

"what?! you got kicked out? my little brother who cared about his fame of being the perfect sport guy? that's not the Norman I know"

she said confused, she was right, Norman had an dream of becoming famous sport player, but now...he didn't want it anymore

"why did they kicked you out anyway?"

she asked and walked inside the teenage room and closed the door shut with her leg

"Ugh, none of your business sissy"

answered Norman bit irritated as Linda chuckled

"oh cmon Lil bro, no need to be pissy, just tell me ty kokote/(you dickhead), why your british ginger cunt got kicked out?"

she said and walked over to him with her hands in her shorts and sat down next to him, well, maybe Norman should say the reason why after all, Linda was the only woman he trusted to tell her everything since she's his siste.

"Well....Dave was choking one of the nerds, Bill Dickey, May have heard of him and so....I punched Dave's back with an chair"

said Norman tired as Linda Chuckled at the true reason for him getting kicked out

"Hah! no way, really? for an nerd? I meaaaan, kinda makes sense since you're nerd yourself, but really? Dickey? isn't that the boy you told me was stubborn and ignorant?"

Norman sighed at Linda words and stood up from the bed

"Yes Yes it is him, I know I shouldn't had done it now but- I don't know why I did it back then, I mean, I should have enjoyed him getting choked and I'm sure Dave would have stopped some time and wouldn't had actually choked Bill to death."

said Norman and let out sigh, his hand through his hair

"it's just....I don't know Linda, I don't know what's happening to me, every time I look at him I just, have this weird feeling, like I'm hungry and have an fever and that I would like to know his mindset even more."

he explained confused and looked at Linda as he noticed she was smirking, an smirk that spoke she knew exactly what Norman was going through, which kinda irritated him

"what? tell me Linda, what the fuck is wrong with me since you're making that stupid smirk"

said Norman and crossed his arms around his chest, as his older sister chuckled and stood up

"Norman Goldstein, you my little brother, you are what's called being in LoOooove"

she said and chuckled, walking around the rooom with her arms behind her

*"No that can't be, that can't be possible, am I... really in love with him? that- that's an bullshit! wake up Norman Goldstein! this isn't you, in love with Bill Dickey?, that's absurd and impossible! just because he is entertaining to listen to, has some genuinely good interests, is an huge ignorant asshole, bad but funny curses and is somewhat good looking fella doesn't mean I'm.... oh god*"

Norman suddenly realised it, he is in love with him, maybe not fully but there is slight interest...he realised he always looked at him longer than on the other nerds, always feeling slight interest and wishing to know his psychology and personality more and now, he even imagined kis-

*"No, No and NO! I- I can't be, that's impossible, absolutely impossible, He's an Homophobic asshole, there's no WAY I have some kind of chance with him, we have nothing much in common! well, I did wanted to start reading comics since it's an form of litera- oh shut up you stupid horny ass brain!"*

"Uhhhhh, my ginger rat is having an boy crush~"

teased Linda as Norman was having arguments in his head, he groaned at Linda teasing words and hiw she could read him so

"Oh shut up you stupid blonde cunt! I'm not in love with him, he's- not my type, and he wouldn't liked me even a bit"

said Norman and sighed as Linda just chuckled

"cmon Norman, I'm sure that little Dickey heart got some weakness for a ginger dickhead like you, I mean look at you! who wouldn't love you right? especially another nerd and besides, he is your type, you literally told me you have things for nerds like yourself"

*"fuck she's right, ugh why did that one time when we went camping with dad and uncle, I told her my type!? fuck, she's not entirely wrong tho, Bill Dickey is indeed Norman type in a man, brown hair, nerd, vulgar, funny..."*

"you know what sis? sure I might love him, I might have a crush on him, but what's your idea of asking him out huh? tell me then"

he said teasingly as he expected her to have no idea, which to his suprise, she smirked and began to explain:

"well firstly you boys are so easy to please, just buy an lightsaber or lego and boom! you will be happy for full years, next definitely buy him something he enjoy, something that he loves, you said some Star wars or marvel long time ago right? buy him that, especially action figures, you boys absolutely love that kind of shit, and then just process to speak some handsome words that your British mouth will say and watch that nerd boy jump into your arms and right into your bed"

finished Linda explaining as Norman blinked and swallowed, he didn't expected her to actually give some valid explanation, especially from lesbian huh, maybe they do know how to approach people after all

"okay....I guess that's how it works, but how do I start conversation with him?"

asked Norman as Linda thought of it

"Well that's bit complicated, it depends if he's neurotipical nerd or neurodivergent nerd, even tho they sound similar, there's a big difference between them, tell me Norman, do you think he's moooore normal weird or weird weird?"

*"is she seriously asking me if Bill is neurotipical or neurodivergent? I don't know him that yet to base him off, sure he does has some kind of Antisocial symptoms, but those could be just anger issues and low empathy, but who knows? I can't judge him too well, but if I had to guess then..."*

"I believe in-between, leaning more to neurotipical"

answered Norman confused as he had no idea how that would help in a bit, Linda made an shaken disgusted face, meaning it was really bad

"Uhhhh, that's not good, that's even more harder for you, but I think the best way to start conversation with him is by some accident, accidentally trip over him, be on a comic con like him, somehow a project that will make you two work together, I don't know"

explained Linda and shrugged her shoulders as she had no idea how to help Norman to become closer with Bill and potentially asking him out. Great that's amazing for Norman. He let out groan and pinched his nose bridge

"great, do you seriously think I will somehow do those things by sheer luck or something? because ain't no way one of those will happen to me"

murmured Norman annoyed as Linda just chuckled and brushed her hand through Norman hair

"give it time Norman, hey maybe the world will be kind enough and give you some opportunity to talk to him more, who knows"

which that out of the way, Linda walked out of Norman room and didn't closed after her, which Norman found very annoying of her to do and so, he got the door and closed the door, letting out an tired sigh as he was thinking about it

should he really start talking with Bill Dickey more? does he have a crush on him and could potentially ask him out? who knows, only the world shall tell if Norman will be lucky, or his life will be miserable.

[meneliltare]

So I read this post earlier...

...and it led to a little bit of self-reflection. Not to be melodramatic or anything, but I think I may be what I will dub as a "repressed writer" for now.

So... not many people know that I write at all. I don't publish what I write, and I'm good at making excuses for it. Okay, yes, I do have actual reasons that keep me from it in my own mind, but apparently I might be wrong about some of them. So here they are:

- my writing feels very personal. My OC has been with me for over 20 years now. She IS me, to a small degree, she changed and grew with teenage me to adult me, and if I publish something about her, I publish a piece of my heart that means a lot to me. Vulnerability in a context where I'm not too sure I can handle it...

- I don't actually like reading about other people's OCs because I can't relate to them in 99% of the cases, so I assume others feel the same if they don't happen to be close friends of mine who have access to learning who exactly my OC is

- I'm a chaotic writer. My OC has a complex story, start to finish. Plenty of headcanon. I can't write cohesive things for the life of me, tho. I write random conversations, little snippets, one shots, some longer episodes about specific encounters I have on my mind, sometimes even just a page of the random thoughts another character has about OC or OC and her relationships, most often Thranduil. Nobody would be able to follow this shit without asking me what the hell it is about.

- I am a lore nerd who often doesn't follow lore when she writes. Does that annoy me when others do it? No, not at all. Am I still doing my own head in wondering if it would bother others? Well, yes.

So yeah. There you have them, my excuses.

Just so I didn't ramble for nothing at all..........here's one of those little snippets I wrote a while ago when I was trying to figure out a more active way of describing practiced magic in my stories, because my OC is half Maia and I didn't want to keep that vague anymore.

Thranduil Oropherion/Kahlan Laurefindiel

*** Like a firestorm ***

Her gaze snapped to him, locking onto his eyes with fierce determination. He read the silent question in her eyes, the split second that she gave him barely enough to grasp it. She was asking permission. He wouldn't deny her, not ever, not now – he saw the red blaze set sapphire pools alight in crimson, and that was the only warning he received as he gave her his consent.

He had expected her touch on his senses to feel somewhat similar to Galadriel's - the nudge on the edge of his consciousness, the gentle alert to her presence in his mind.

It was nothing like that.

As soon as he nodded, her power engulfed him, blazing through his mind in a roar of hot, searing flames. It was a merciless, burning invasion of pure heat, rushing through his entire being, soaring through every fibre of his body, scorching every hint of resistance in his very fëa, until she had taken control sweepingly, leaving him fully exposed to every flicker of the roaring wildfire of her essence.

His mind staggered for a moment, instinctively trying to push back on her, but the attempt fluttered uselessly against the blaze within him. He fell back a step behind her and the wizard, momentarily feeling vulnerable, and immediately, he felt her backing off, ever so slightly releasing the hold of the smoldering heat on his mind.

He breathed deeply.

Then, he opened his mind fully, willingly accepting her, and the rush of flames took hold of him again.

As he charged forward, he could feel her power interlacing with his every move, hot tendrils of blistering magic wrapping around his mind, his arm, the muscles of his thigh, his sword, EVERYTHING. It was an all-consuming sensation of raw strength, and he felt his own energy surge and reverberate with it, pulsing with its rhythm.

[astrylx]

Supernatural Liveblog - S.5 Ep.09 - The Real Ghostbusters

If you couldn't tell by now, I am a nerd invested in nerd culture. I haven't been to a convention since pre-covid times though, so this episode is going to make me jealous I fear.

I'm feeling this episode won't be super lore heavy. We may get a Chuck appearance though. We will also probably see Becky (that was her name, right?) and other Wincest fans which I do not look forward to seeing.

Dean looking at the line of Impalas, his facial expression is so funny

CHUCK! I like Chuck a lot! Don't fully trust him, I think he's more than just a prophet (especially because why would a prophet show up now of all times) but I still quite enjoy him.

Oh fuck, it's her. I hate her. I hate the way she treats Sam.

I love when Sam does that little silent sigh. I have a feeling this episode will be full of it.

I do like this episode giving love to fan culture.

THE HOMOEROTIC SUBTEXT OF SUPERNATURAL??

I like that there's an Ash cosplayer, I loved Ash. I miss you buddy.

Chuck being all nervous-

Sam and Dean are p i s s e d at this announcement. Sam genuinely looks close to tears, but that could be from the Ruby question.

I love how the actress playing the ghost seems so tired of this.

Also I KNEW THERE WOULD BE REAL GHOSTS HERE, LET'S GO!

You would think the convention organizers, Chuck at least, knowing this shit is real, would know better than to do this at a real place where there is REAL DANGER-

WHY DID SHE LICK HER HAND AND BLOW IT TO HIM?

Chuck is jealous~

Dean is willing to shoot someone over them being annoying?

Dean sounds like a real nerd talking like he is.

In fact

He sounds like some of you on tumblr-

Okay, piecing the story together. Gore didn't let the children pick on her son. They ignore her and attack the boy, scalping him and killing him. Gore killed them in rage in response, before killing herself, guilty over her actions and what had happened. Gore was also likely protecting the property from the boys.

THEY'RE GONNA USE THE ACTRESS, LET'S GO!!!

Actually that's not really a good thing.

The two nerds wanting to help, aw!

THEY'RE GONNA SAVE THE DAY!!!

CHUCK SAVING THE DAY!!!

Ew, Becky is into it...

THEY DID IT! THE NERDS SAVED THE DAY!! That makes me very happy!

Dean being honest and they don't take him seriously, I love that.

I like how their words are changing Dean's perspective.

Aww they're boyfriends!

Wait...

They better not... Um...

Becky dating Chuck, I don't know how to feel about this...

"No, not really. We have guns and we'll find you." I love this line. I love Jared's delivery of it.

BECKY TELLING THEM WHERE THE COLT IS.

CROWLEY??

LET'S GO!!

BLOOPER REAL OF CHUCK ANSWERS!!

This episode was great. I thoroughly enjoyed it. It also had a lot more plot than I expected.

[persephoneprice]

aaa lily this ask game is so cool and amazing!!

i have soo many people id love to compliment so here goes

lily - im gonna start off with complimenting u bc u were my first friend on here! i feel like u connected the fandom together and ur kindness and friendliness is the reason we're so tight-knit now. ur literally the heart of our fandom and i wouldn't have it any other way. you're creative, hilarious and a wonderful human being, pls know that ❤️

@satisaranea - lynn u r literally the best ilysm /p. ur literally just like me for real, a fellow brit teenager, kmfdm enjoyer and ex danganronpa nerd. ur also incredibly talented and ur takes are SO refreshing to see in this fandom 💗

@keeperofsecretsunderthehill - i love our chats together so so much, u get me fr. im so glad we started talking and became friends, ur so awesome and ur ocs are so incredibly fascinating and i love every single one of them (nikole i would protect u with my life)

@felixravinstills i admire u so so much. ur felixposting has not only intrigued me but inspired me to create and find happiness (and every other emotion lmao) in others art and my own ♥️ i think i've said this before but you're the reason i began posting my writing here and im forever grateful for that.

@fairyhagmother - nell omg. first of all im so glad ur here in this fandom bc most of the corso lore would be lost without you (vigiles, juvenes, vast majority of the Glore). you bring so many amazing ideas and concepts to the table and i aspire to be like that one day ❤️ ur also genuinely so sweet and im glad we're friends!!

@coryo - first off im forever greatful you and lily created the server bc tbh idk where id be without it. ur an Og Tbosaser TM and ur ideas about it are so interesting and cool!!! i appreciate ur always open to talk on the server and are so welcoming. ur art is also very very cool.

i do have More but these were the ones i wanted to get off my chest ❤️ (will perhaps send the rest later if it isn't too annoying 🤧)

ask game! ah thank you this is wonderful bel!!

it’s so sweet of you to say i connected the fandom 🥺 you’re my og tbosas friend and i cherish you <3

@satisaranea is such a delight! i’m so glad we managed to trap the haymitch stan into our corse creatures craziness!

@keeperofsecretsunderthehill is such a sweetie and is so creative!! i always love hearing her lore <3

@felixravinstills my beloved <3 truly a pioneer 😌 always inspiring me and making me feel more comfortable to share me own silly thoughts and ideas!

@fairyhagmother we are all so lucky to have nell <3 she’s so smart and adds such fun insight and ideas for all of our most insane senior citizens

@coryo i’ll never be able to express enough how grateful i am for him!! creating the corso creatures server really brought us all so much closer <3

[solbach-colbrock]

Up Top! - Seth Borden X Reader

SUMMARY - You and Seth have developed a… unique high five

WARNINGS - none

WORDS - 1k

NOTES - This is actually something I used to do with a friend of mine. I thought it would be cute to write. Also Chase is in this one

~*~*~*~

Neither of you were sure how long you had been doing it, but by now it was practically automatic. Every time you and Seth got excited, you would… well, it wasn’t quite a high-five, but that was the closest approximation you could make. You got a few odd looks and laughs the first couple of times, but at this point you got looked at funny if Seth’s palm didn’t collide with your forehead when you two were hyped up about something.

At least part of it was due to your height difference. Being shorter than him, you had already become his designated armrest, so it was no real surprise when he started joking about your height by holding out his hand to high five you right at your face height and you just… smacked it with your forehead in spite. It was goofy, and the fans definitely loved it. 

You, Seth, and Chase were filming a video for Chase’s channel. It was a quiz challenge thing, all the questions coming from Twitter fans asking you about details of your past videos that you were likely to get wrong. The two losers of the challenge had to dye a strip of their hair whatever color the winner decided. Two of you were gonna end up matching, and as funny as the concept was, you’d rather not let either of them decide what colors your hair was. 

“I fucking knew it, too! My first fucking thought was, ‘oh it was definitely my green hoodie’, but then you started talking and I started doubting myself! Motherfucker,” you exclaimed, sinking into the backseat of the car. You put your head in your hands, annoyed by the laughter coming from the brothers in the front seats. 

“Haha! I messed with your mind!” Seth laughed.

Y: “Guys, this man in gaslighting me! I have it here.”

S: “Alright Chase, your turn.”

C: “Damn, alright. Hit me.”

S: “What was the name of the man who was rumored to have hung himself at the Shanley Hotel?”

C: “Ah, fuck. How am I supposed to remember that? We filmed that a couple months ago.”

Y: “Even I know the answer to this, and I haven’t even been there yet.”

S: “How the fuck do you know then?”

Y: “I watched the video! I was interested in the lore! It was new information!”

S: “Fuckin’ nerd, alright. What’re you a fan or something?”

Y: “Oh, I’m so sorry for supporting you and your career, Jesus.”

S: “Ok Chase you’ve had plenty of time to come up with an answer. What do you think his name was? Like, honestly, if I didn’t have the answer right in front of me, I don’t think I'd be able to answer this one.”

C: “Fuck, um… David or somethin’? I don’t know!”

S: “Final answer?”

C: “I guess? I really don’t know.”

The smirk on your face grew to a grin as he answered.

S: “Wrong, it was William.”

Y: “Get fucked! Oh, I knew you weren’t getting that one.”

S: “Now you two are tied.”

C: “One of us is gonna lose.”

Y: “Seth is already losing this one.”

S: “Yea, there’s no way I’m wining. I’ve only got two questions right.”

Y: “Should we do a tiebreaker? One question, and whoever gets the answer right first wins?”

C: “Oh, yea. We gotta find a question both of us could answer, though.”

S: “Alright, I’ll look. Give me a second.”

You and Chase relaxed for a moment, avoiding opening your phones in case you came across the same question that Seth could ask you. Chase turned around in his seat when he heard you chuckle to yourself.

“What’s funny?” he asked.

“Oh, nothing. Just deciding what color would look best on you two.” He rolled his eyes at you, his competitive side coming out full force now that it was down to the wire.

“What makes you think you’re winnin’?” You folded your arms over your chest in defiance.

“I’ve watched the videos multiple times. I know what the fans have seen.”

S: “Okay, shut up. I’ve got the question. At the Hatfield Estate, what did the ghost of Arnold whisper in Josh’s ear?”

Y: “Oh, shit! Fuck, I know this!”

C: “God, what was it? I was standin’ right next to him when it happened, too. Damn it…”

S: “You guys get thirty more seconds before I need an answer, right or wrong. Whoever gets closest, I'll take it.”

C: “God, was it ‘come find me’? I remember it was a little kid sayin’ it.”

S: “That-“

Y: “No! It was ‘over here’ because after we started freaking out about it the REM pod started going off in the other room! Like it was trying to show us where it was!”

S: “Yea, that’s correct, actually. Chase, you lost.”

You were practically jumping in the back seat from excitement, cheering at Chase’s distraught state. Your hyper reaction was infectious, and Seth stuck his arm towards the back seat for a high five. You threw your head forward, your forehead making contact with his open palm.

S: “Let’s go! Good job.”

Y: “I fuckin’ knew it! Now I have to decide on a color.”

S: “Wait fuck I forgot I have to do that. What the hell am I celebrating for?”

The three of you wrapped up the video, opting to post pictures of you dying their hair as well as the final result on instagram later. 

“How many edits do you think we’re gonna get out of the high five this time?” Seth asked, knowing full well there would be some made within an hour of posting the video. There were always at least a couple when you two did that. The fans loved your silly little habit. They thought it was really cute and endearing, and frankly, so did you.

“Oh, plenty. It’s been at least two months since we did that on camera. They’re gonna eat that shit up.”

“Will you two just fuckin’ date already?”

“Chase!”

“Shut up, bro!’

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s4 episode 7 "musings of a cigarette-smoking man" thoughts

my very first thoughts: a CANCER MAN episode??? are we gonna get some backstory?? some CSM lore?!?!? 

part of me is deeply curious, but part of me also wants agent time, so… hmm! i’m intrigued. my curiosity? it’s been piqued.

and the lone gunmen have been mentioned!!

author's note: woah... i was expecting a lot of things, but cancer man being a flop author was not one of them. it's kinda sad, but mostly just pathetic.

judgement aside, i actually really liked this episode. there are things i would change, but i thought it was super intriguing to see certain parts of what is hidden beyond the curtain, but never enough to fully satisfy you, which i do love about this show (even if it is occasionally infuriating). the multi-part structure was also an interesting and unique choice that worked well, but i do have some... questions on writing/character motives and if they were well-received. but you'll see what i mean in a bit.

a lot happened in this episode, which i shall begin to recount below!

OH! we open with a shakespeare quote!!! “for nothing can seem foul to those that win” oooookay i suppose that is relevant to our ciggy man. damn. couldn’t be me. a lot of things are foul to me. such as killing melissa. 

we see a rat! a rat! cute little critter. oh. cancer man arrives, and is less cute. he's looking at some broken windows… damn, why is s4 so dark? i keep having to turn my brightness up. it's annoying!!

his lighter says “trust no one” omg… he’s so weird. just an overall strange fellow. seriously, who gets a custom lighter that says that? way to draw attention to yourself while trying to Not Do That.

so he’s opening a suitcase…. WHAT!! he is somehow listening to a bunch of conversations, including the “not everything is a dark labyrinth of conspiracy” one, which means he must have had bugs in all of the rooms where mulder and scully chat!!! who has time to sort through all of that audio content to find the juicy stuff?? probably his freak interns that i KNOW he keeps scattering about

okay, so he’s listening to a conversation now between the lone gunmen and mulder. frohike is freaked tf out, but mulder says no one would kill him because “you’re just a little puppy dog”. aww. that's a cute thing to say.

GAG!! the lone gunmen put on a special audio filter to hide their conversation, and CSM just pressed a button to totally ignore it, and turns to the camera with a smirk. EW! EW! creepy man. ugh, i can’t believe i paused and had to look at that awful creepy smirk for more than a few milliseconds.

oh my goodness, scully is also here during this conversation between the lone gunmen and mulder that we are listening to via CSM's technologically aided eavesdropping. frohike is saying he found stuff about cancer man, while cancer man loads what looks like a SNIPER RIFLE, and aims it out the window??? “what did you find?” “possibly everything”

GASP! i’m hooked. i DO want to know possibly everything. 

(watching the intro and that scene where they burst in with the gun always gets me, but today it’s making me ache in my chest because of how beautiful they are. so feel free to psychoanalyze that)

frohike is describing trotsky’s assassination. this is an area of history i am weak in, so i am seated for my lesson. it is actually entirely unrelated to the plot at hand, and is just some frohike nerd lore, but that's cool, i like a dude who knows these things.

frohike says “he” (presumably CSM) appears on august 20th, 1940, in louisiana. and his father was a communist activist, executed for espionage before his son would walk!!! and his mother died of lung cancer before he could talk!

damn. tragic backstory for this fellow. he pretty much said "i know cigarettes killed my mom but i'm different"

he was sent to various orphanages where he spent his time reading and not making friends. then he went off the grid until a year and a half after the Bay Of Pigs. weird way of measuring time- before and after the Bay of Pigs

OH! we get more text… “part 1: things really did go well in Dealey Plaza” hmmm....

some army men are jogging, while another dude reads the manchurian candidate, saying he would rather read the worst novel ever written than the best movie ever made. he must not know about the novels that are out there… i assume this is cig man?

OH MY GOD! he’s talking to MR. MULDER! wait, wait that means….

! MULDER LORE REVEAL ! his first word was JFK

that is... actually really adorable. and will make his toddler stage difficult as he has to break certain news to baby mulder.

why do i get the feeling, from the shaky way CSM just set the photo of mr. mulder’s wife and child down, that he is fighting suppressed romantic feelings for his buddy like the cold war depends on it? hmm....

these fancy looking men want to talk to the guy i assume is cancer man. they ask if he was involved in any of the big events from the early 1960’s, which he denies. you know, assassinations and whatnot.

oh! when they ask if his father was executed as a spy, he says his only regret is that “i was too young to throw the switch myself” which is kind of a crazy thing to say. "yes i never knew my dad but i wish it was me that killed him" is a wild hill to die on. but i guess this is what the 60's did to people.

OH! he also denies a cigarette when offered, saying he never touches them. well. some things went down between then and now, i assume. and hopefully, we shall gain a glimpse into what changed.

this general dude is yapping about extraordinary men and i assume he is referring to himself. and his father. and young CSM, too, can be an extraordinary man! 

“communism is without a doubt the most heinous personification of evil mankind has ever confronted” <- said by a guy who likely fought the nazis, this is an absolutely crazy line... but again, i guess that shows how deep everyone was into the propaganda

they are offering baby CSM a very important job… so important, his army service will be erased… he needs to assassinate an american civilian, former naval pt-boat commander…

OH MY GOD, DID HE KILL JFK???

this is wild. how many different characters across various medias have been responsible for killing JFK? does anyone have a spreadsheet? if not, DM me and let’s make one 

so what is the reason in universe for why JFK had to kick the bucket….

because of the bay of pigs failure??

i get it was bad, but i didn’t think it was THAT bad. that makes no sense though timeline wise… they said bay of pigs was “last week”, but that was 1961, and obviously he didn’t get shot until 1963. so are we expected to believe that they waited 2 years to kill him? 2 years in which a lot of stuff happened? or is this some sort of factual oversight i’m supposed to ignore. or am i misunderstanding the episode structure. did i mishear/read a line?

(digs my claws in) you guys i cannot ignore a JFK anachronism i’m sorry

and now we're off to texas to witness the inevitable. this dude playing lee harvey oswald is lowkey cute, a thing i never thought i would have typed more than a few minutes ago. CSM yells at him about how smoking is BAD!

baby cancer man is talking to lee harvey oswald (another wild sentence), telling him he’ll see the president today. he calls baby cig man “mr. hunt” which i assume is a fake name… and he lies and says he loves the movies!! how simply do the falsehoods slip from his tongue!

ooooookay i see what is going on here. “mr. hunt” is a member of a cuban loyalty group telling lee harvey oswald to hide some weapons. a fall guy is being carefully crafted.

and lee gives him his cigarettes… the same cigarettes baby cig man scolded him for smoking…. omg…. foreshadowing

you know, in all my years studying history, i have never imagined what the inside of the book depository building looked like. and OMG! in googling to try and see if this was an accurate representation, i learned that dealey plaza is where he was shot! so i guess i’m good with JFK lore, but bad at geography. but that answers what the whole opening quote was about.

baby cig man is getting in a sewer to do some crime… very eugene tooms of him. he's getting his gun out in the sewer for a sneak attack…. while lee gets a root beer… and it seems umbrella man was giving a signal on when to shoot! fascinating.

(jackie’s outfit that day looked less fuzzy irl than it appears in this episode, so please take note of that wardrobe people)

nah, this is gonna make me feel bad for a FAKE lee harvey oswald…

and while JFK was dying, baby cig man stayed in that sewer the whole time… wow. i feel like someone should have taken a peek.

soooo realizing he is a patsy, lee shoots a cop. which is actually just far more incriminating than had he done anything else. then he goes to the movies. where the cops find him. and baby cig man was watching all of this…. he pulls out a cigarette and starts smoking. OMG was that his first?? to cope with the Guilt?? damn.

it’s a bit of a ludicrous story that makes me giggle when i consider the real-world implications, but i will take it for what it is.

but back to modern cig man, listening to all of this being explained. he says nothing, seeming to confirm the accuracy of what is being said.

“part 2: just down the road from graceland”

no, don’t tell me he killed ELVIS, too?!?!?

wait, i read that wrong. “just down the road aways from graceland” okay, not sure if that clears anything up. but we hear the voice of martin luther king jr.

no… don’t tell me he killed HIM, too…..

notably, this whole part is in black and white. cigarette man is tap tapping on his typewriter. he’s writing a book! “take a chance: a jack colquitt adventure” <- sounds boring 

he’s listening to MLK talk about Marxist revolutions… is baby cig man a closet commie? no, for it appears he is deeply upset by these words!

he’s still in black and white, at a meeting about MLK, talking about how some claim he wishes to wage war against white america. baby cig man says “wouldn’t you?”, and i begin to wonder if he is based, but these hopes are quickly dampened as he explains that MLK's existence and activism are no longer civil rights issues… because he said something about communism. bro. what. is this how people actually felt…?

(you read about the paranoia and the terror of the red scare, but seeing an attempt at putting it in context still makes you think damn, times were weird)

this council is now talking about how they can best discredit MLK, and we see a guy who is blamed for the “there is but one way out for you” letter, which baby cig man says is stupid. oh, he blamed the director of the FBI for that. damn!

cigarette man says we need another patsy, and to make it a white man, so “it” (referring to king’s assassination) looks racially motivated. and oh! he says he’ll do it himself.

“i have too much respect for the man” <- so you’re gonna be the one that kills him? bro… what. we don't usually kill the people we look up to where i come from.

so. cig man lights up as he stands outside a building where MLK speaks. 

AND HE PULLS OUT THE PHOTO OF BABY MULDER AND HIS MOM???? WHAT THE FUCK

(is this like a “he’s grieving because his work demands that he never has a family” kind of thing or a “he’s longing for the embrace of mr. mulder” kinda thing….? does he love mrs. mulder….? what is this….)

cancer man gives the dude he’s framing a couple hundred dollars. and then gets in the bushes behind where dr. king is staying. i'm still processing the photo reveal.

and bam.

wow, i feel that this is… weird. idk, the whole “this character killed JFK” thing has been going on for so long that it doesn’t really feel that shocking, but dr. king’s death is a tragedy in a different way, and i’m not sure that using it in fiction is like, super appropriate? um.

while i am unsure if i feel that using a civil rights leader's assassination in your alien story is something we should brush past, i do understand what the writers are attempting to do here, which is show how dedicated to the anti-communist cause cig man is, and how he'll stop at nothing to do what he deems needed, no matter how ugly or horrific. i recognize what they are trying to tell me.

LMAOOOO WAIT. place my moral pondering aside for a brief second. if you pause, you can read the rejection letter baby cig man gets for his book. “my advice? burn it!” <- DAMN that book must have been god awful 😭

oh god. now the TV is mentioning RFK… don’t tell me cig man did that, too…

(author's note: thankfully, he was not involved with the killing of this kennedy brother; no clear statement on whether or not he was responsible for ted's whole thing)

AND WHY was cig man putting that photo of mrs. and baby mulder in his drawer…?!?!

cig man seems to be almost crying while quoting aeschylus along with RFK on the tv, as he speaks about the grief of losing both his brother and MLK…. damn. am i supposed to feel bad for CSM? because i don’t. 

back to modern cancer man. we now enter “part 3, the most wonderful time of the year”.

jump to 1991. he has saddam hussein on the phone?? and tells him to call back. and some other dude is working on the oscar noms LMAO wait... i lowkey love the idea that the government controls those... need to think what that would imply for every single winner ever

AND he rigs the superbowl so the bills don’t win LMAO what is his beef with buffalo?! AND he rigged the olympic hockey game in ‘80?

we’re getting the impression he kinda controls everything. message received loud and clear.

OH! now they’re talking about mulder… “that ‘spooky’ kid”, is how they refer to him. and CSM says that mulder is his to keep an eye on. i'm sure that's part of his decades long plot, to keep mulder under his watchful eye and use him as a pawn in his schemes. also, gorbachev has just resigned. no more enemies to fight.

and CSM gives his men some presents for christmas. how thoughtful…..? 

his men invite him to come with them to virginia for a family get together. damn, they like this guy? it seems they honestly do!

he got them all ties…. very strange fellow he is.

okay, so he lied and said he had to go see family to escape the gathering. and then ominously walks outside mulder’s office door. dun dun DUN!

he has some mail… and opens it to see something that displeases him. THEN HE STARTS WRITING AGAIN!! it seems like auto fiction, when you write about yourself but pretend it’s happening to a character. damn. crazy coping mechanism. good to know that he is kinda a loser all around. 

so, some days he longs for a second chance. okay, yeah, we all do cancer man, and most of us didn’t kill JFK.

the phone rings. it’s DEEP THROAT! my old friend!! were they tight?!

it seems that on christmas eve of 1991 was when a weird alien spaceship arrived to earth. and the occupant is in “critical condition”. also, deep throat mentions the UFO he had claimed to see before in vietnam, so we know he wasn’t lying entirely about that.

they have this fleshy pink alien hooked up to life support, which has me wondering how alien life support works, and also how many types of aliens we are dealing with in this universe. but i’ve mentioned that before. still! worth mentioning again!

lore reveal that is unsettling... DEEP THROAT’S NAME IS RONALD???? 

idk, i was expecting something like abernathy or shackleton or cromswell!

deep throat gives cigarette man the gun to handle the alien situation- but CSM protests, saying that a “living EBE” could advance bill mulder’s project by decades!!! MR. MULDER MENTIONED?!? he'd be willing to break protocol to help his buddy out?!?

but no, deep throat recites the rules from the security council resolution, which makes him remember what they came here to do.

can you just… shoot an alien??? to kill it? well. you can shoot some of them to kill them, but not the kind that need the special neck stabbing device. okay, keeping track of all this, just seems like maybe all aliens would need something a bit cooler to vanquish them.

they’re fighting over killing an alien…. cig man doesn’t want to do it, so he tosses a coin. so he makes deep throat do it?!?! deep throat says that this is their new enemy. honestly, the sad little alien does not look like he can hurt you, but okay.

(i mean, do they really need the gun? he’s an alien on life support, just pull the plug)

oh…. cig man rips the bandage off his neck as deep throat climbs into some gear to… gas the alien? now what is the significance of this bandage that has been on his neck but ONLY for part three of the story?

that alien is creepy. deep throat really does shoot the damn thing. and cig man lights up while this goes down. is every cigarette one dude he killed….? damn. that’s like 5 packs a day….

“part 4: the x-files”

OOOO, info on scully being brought in!!!

OMG!!! we see parts of her thesis.

did we know she went to the university of maryland? well, i didnt, so that counts as a…

! SCULLY LORE REVEAL ! she graduated from the university of maryland in 1986!

(looking back, i realize this was all flashback stuff from the pilot. but i didn't KNOW at the time that this show would do such things to me, so i wasn't taking detailed notes! wow! how much has changed)

but it’s cancer man reading her thesis. stay away from her!

okay, now we’re back to one of the earliest times we ever saw scully, in her pilot episode fit. and was cig man actually there in the pilot? i think he was, right?

aww, we get to relive the “FBI’s most unwanted” moment through cancer man’s listening. it’s creepy, but still a heartwarming time.

back to the modern day- frohike is talking about how cancer man is “the most dangerous man alive”, because he believes these actions are all that life allows him, and he can never escape himself. damn. that’s deep.

and then back to the 1991 christmas eve scene… an editor loved CSM's book! he used the pen name “raul bloodworth”… have we heard that before? well, i’ll keep an eye out on various shelves. so he calls the number they gave him… he is desperate for validation… and he’s going on about how he wants the cover to look. there’s a cutting comment about “working with young authors”, and the publisher says he’ll have to “relinquish some control”. and cancer man is SO excited.

oh my gosh… wait, why am i lowkey emotional now? but that emotion is very specifically second hand embarrassment.

so he’s typing his RESIGNATION LETTER?? for the day the story gets published. for some reason he thinks that getting one story published = a life of steady income. HAH! if only.

he even takes a wistful look at his cigarettes and crushes them in his hand!!! wow, a time to begin again.

lmao i see a reference to darin morgan in the background magazines… do not think you are slick, props team!

CSM’s going to go pick up his story from a newspaper… and his story was published in a porno… and they changed his ending… 

this is NOT a good thing omg

and the newspaper salesman says that the magazine is garbage…

we just watched his dreams die in real time. and with the magazine, he buys another pack of cigarettes. damn. no chance for a new life, i guess. 

CSM’s now monologing about how life is like a box of chocolates (disappointing), and this is an interesting juxtaposition, because he is next to a man who is digging through garbage while he says all this, so clearly his material status could be a lot worse but it’s probably a mental prison, being rich and important and also sad.

Frohike clarifies that this CSM theory is based on a story he read, but he’s going to check with some hackers. as frohike walks out the door, cancer man mumbles that he can kill him whenever he pleases, but chooses not to do so today. 

woah… very different, but i actually really liked this episode!

i liked getting a peek into the mystical lore surrounding CSM, but also it wasn’t THAT much of a peek, you know? we know a few of the things he did, and that he did them in the name of fighting communism. i guess when he thought that communism was “defeated” they switched to aliens, but also aliens had to be there the whole time, because they did make the agreement about it after ww2. so he’s been up to a lot of stuff.

do i feel a little bad that he can’t get his writing published? yeah, but like i said in a “it’s cringey” kinda way, which i think was the intention. it’s funny that he has amassed all this power but is still a flop. 

like i said, i feel weird about the whole MLK thing. i think the coloring going black and white was to illustrate CSM's black and white thinking, about how you are either right or wrong, and to be wrong requires punishment, no matter what anyone else says on the matter. that was interesting.

hmm, i'm pondering. what will happen next to our smoky- well, i was going to say "our smoky friend", but we are not friends at all, are we? where will our tobacco-filled creep lead us?

i liked this one! it was really different from the traditional episode structure, so it felt special and nice. i liked getting an idea of his line of work and how he got involved with it and why, even if the killing post-Bay of Pigs thing was weird, but i GUESS it did bring the soviets and cuba closer together, so i GUESS if you thought anything that advanced communism had to be avenged, you would think that is a logical conclusion.

hmm, i can't afford to try and figure out who actually did it IRL! too much on my plate. it's an interesting theory... i shall have to give it a long contemplation.

[hedonistbyheart]

Ooh I am interested in why you dislike AMC’s IWTV

Oh buddy.

The simple answer is I've been a Vampire Chronicles fan for over 20 years and my entire teenage years were spent escaping into those books instead of dealing with my real life.

I could get into how every change in the adaption has distanced the characters from the core of who they are in the books, some of the more major things being how they exist as vampires wrt having sex/going out in daylight/smoking etc. And how that matters to how they are monsters who symbolise outsiders and misfits in the world.

Even the time period change has changed something fundamental in how their dynamics work and because I have breathed these books for decades, I can't be normal about it.

I'm annoyed about Rings of Power in a sort of "I'm a Tolkien nerd and know too much lore to enjoy it" way, but it's just occasionally annoying. AMC IWTV makes me cringe out of my skin. Kind of like second-hand embarrassment, but a hundred times worse.

I wish I never had to see it, but I can't escape it.

[prongsfish]

*blinks* headcanons *blinks*

okay. i am almost a month late to this ask hi @ethanmilo ... sorry about that... and i will be using it to give the barty hcs you asked for over a month before this but the ask expired... sorry about that again... my bad time is scary

but yes barty headcanons. these may end up leaning into bartylus territory because i am So obsessed with them right now but i have no idea what i'm going to write yet so we'll see HAHA

(jumping back here after writing this, most of these are lighthearted but some do get a bit more serious/dark, nothing out of character for what you see scrolling on maraurders tumblr but i just don't want people to be shocked by the tone shift)

he doesn't take day-to-day school life seriously and fucks around in most of the classes he doesn't skip altogether BUT his competitiveness is not to be underestimated. he's barely in class and he never pays attention but he gets away with it because he's so smart that when he started school he was already suuper advanced. he just kept working on his own and so was always way ahead of whatever he was supposed to be learning, so he's super annoying and disruptive during classes but when it comes time to it he's still at the top of all his classes. he and reg are always warring for the number one spot and they're a nightmare to be around during exams because they are SO competitive

he'd give himself those shitty stick and poke tattoos at like age fourteen, if you've seen the videos of kids on tiktok with the ugliest shoddiest tattoos you've ever seen you know what i mean... i just found this image on pinterest and this is Exactly the sort of shit he'd have. i think he'd have always been constantly drawing on his work and skin with a quill/pen and he does not fear permanence. the moment he found a way to give himself tattoos he was doing it.

the absolute biggest shit stirrer you've ever met, everything he does is always in the hopes of pissing someone off. he will lie, he will argue, he will push and shove his way into a confrontation and when someone eventually breaks his nose he just starts laughing

he knows Everyone. he has connections to everyone in whatever city he's in, he constantly "knows a guy" and every time it's the most absurd story that his friends have never heard a single word of but it's 100% true. his lore is infinite. and people expect it to be limited to just where he lives but no, he could go to a whole new country and still be being stopped every 5 minutes by some old friend who's thrilled to see him

related to the above, he is that Coolest Fucking uncle. he's awful with kids but god damn it if he doesn't have the most legendary stories to tell luna as often as she could ever want!!

he knows a shit ton of languages. he started learning them because he was bored and it eventually it just became a Thing and he's fluent in like 4 or 5 but can hold a decent conversation in upwards of 10 others too

he looks like he smells bad. he wouldn't smell bad when he was younger, still too used to certain privileges of his class, but the further he strayed from his father and family, especially into young adulthood, i think he would start to—unless regulus was in his life, in which case he'd better smell like fucking roses if he ever wanted to be seen anywhere even Near him in public

i heavily associate him with nu metal and post industrial music but i also think that when he was younger he would've been suuper into all those whiny indie rock bands that normal people call midwest emo, music nerds crucify you for calling midwest emo, and i have no clue what to call. he'd totally have his own band inspired by them too, and he totally has the voice for it—the voice that's objectively terrible but works perfectly for that style of music

he doesn't talk about how he feels like ever but those close to him have worked out ways to get him what he needs when he needs it. he refuses to ask for help but his friends know him well enough that they don't need him to ask, they can pick up his question in far fewer words, and even though it's still hard for him to even imply that he needs help it's a lot easier when he can talk around the issue rather than having to actually using his words. his friends know that it'd be better if he Did use his words but they also know that if they tried to stop letting him get away with not asking properly he'd just stop trying to ask at all

his favourite film genres are horror and action, the gorier the better. he loooooves all the saw films

he's super messy, his room is a fucking NIGHTMARE. shit EVERYWHERE. clothes strewn all around, dishes stacked in several tall piles, three different rubbish bins that are each around 70% full from the times he's been forced to "clean up" and eventually gotten bored/distracted. regulus despises it and refuses to go anywhere near his room meanwhile evan is so excited because every time he goes into barty's room he discovers a new species of mould. sometimes when he's really lucky barty will kick over a pile of clothes to find something and like eight cockroaches scurry out (evan immediately rushes to grab as many of them as possible before they disappear and then takes them home)

by the time he was a preteen he'd given up on the idea that his father would ever be proud of him, had flipped to doing everything in his power to anger him further, entirely stopped caring about the consequences because if his father would hate him no matter what he did why not make it reflect badly back on him, since he cared so much about his public image as a politician. he never intended to leave though, because he couldn't bear the thought of leaving his mother with him. that was until he pushed too far with his dad, got too sucked into the lifestyles of others who'd given up just like him, fell too deeply into the depression and the anger and the violence, until he crossed a line and his mother was looking at him like she was disappointed, too. he realised that he was trying so hard to stay for his mother but staying was making him a worse person and it wasn't worth it anymore if she could no longer see what he was doing as a sacrifice, and only as surface level "badness". he hated leaving his mother more than he hated his dad but in the end staying was only making things worse for the both of them

he uses humour and stupidity as a defence mechanism, and while he does find it fun to do ridiculous and reckless things he also does it because it gives him a role to fill. he can't stand being genuine because he's terrified of rejection, so he'd rather lean into all the superficial judgements made about him. if when someone shuffles away from him in public transport he bares his teeth at them and when someone expects him to be stupid he purposefully misunderstands a simple concept, then nobody actually knows him and nobody can hurt him in a way that matters. the person they insult isn't actually him so they can't possibly get to him

he is VERY judgemental and he and regulus can spend hours talking shit about anyone from lifelong classmates to complete strangers. it surprises everyone that he actually gets along with remus really well, but it's because remus has a more judge-y side that he hides when with anyone but regulus and, apparently, barty

he and dorcas are the gay man and lesbian best friends duo and people have probably mistaken them as a couple before, which they'd both be mortified by. "have they seen us?!?!"

okay i'm forcing myself to end it there because i have an essay draft to finish and a substantial amount of french homework to do in the next like 4-5 hours (nobody is allowed to say shit about my sleep schedule i don't want to hear it HAHAHA) and i've already been writing this for WELL over an hour so i really should stop giving myself ways to procrastinate, i hope these were enough to make up even slightly for the very long wait <//3 ah barty crouch jr, the one and only love of my life... i would be utterly terrified of you in real life but i would also be very attracted to you from a safe distance which is basically the highest form of compliment i can possibly give a person

[squeakyleftsneaker]

Watching My Hero Academia for the first time: S1, Ep. 3-5

Hello there again! I've returned to see some more adorable character design and cool fight scenes. And hopefully our small green protagonist become a hero. As ever I know a limited amount going in and have since blocked the tag from my feed, please don't spoil me! I'll compile a list of what I like and what I don't like as I go on, and I'll paragraph a bit later on if I see the need.

The Good Stuff

It is DELICIOUS to me that this show brings up the degree to which All Might has reshaped society. I can feel them setting that up to be ripped away at some point

One for All I LOVE the Three Musketeers! IS THERE ALL FOR ONE?? IS THAT THE EQUAL AND OPPOSITE QUIRK???

I love a Dumas reference what can I say

Yes All Might we love doing a public service as a workout. HELL YEAH! Clean up that beach!

Exploding limbs from the superpower is CRAZY I love it. And I love the English All Might sprinkles in.

His school is comically awful AND KATSUKI IS JUST IGNORING HIM WE LOVE INTROSPECTION? Maybe they'll actually manage to make this redemption thing work (they, and I cannot stress this enough, did make it hard as hell on themselves with the whole "jump off a roof and hope for a quirk in your next life" thing

All Might's old-school swimsuit got a genuine laugh out of me. Delightful montage.

AND HIM ON A SEGWAY IN A TRENCH I CAN ONLY PRESUME TO BE DESIGNER WHAT A KING. I love that our protagonist is an overworker. He's so real. And he got RIPPED. Congrats lil guy.

I did cackle out loud at him looking like a roided up bodybuilder.

"EAT THIS" IM CRYING

Katsuki's scarf. I know what you are. Lil homie gayass.

Hello this is My Hero Academia Of Adorable Character Design THIS FLOATY GIRL IS PRECIOUS. SO BABY. AWWW. DAUGHTER ADOPTED.

Love that no one is matching our sweet green boy's freak when it comes to the heroes. He's so lame. I love him.

I kinda want more lore with Katsuki and our greenie. It seems like the threats are like. Empty. But they don't have friend energy to be joking like that. It's intriguing. I am compelled!

Ok Mr. Class President you annoying man let's not call out our green boy for being a nerd. You too are a nerd. Bricks are being lobbed from a grass house.

NAPOLEON MENTION???? BRO THIS IS A FRANCOPHILE SUPERHERO SCI FI SCHOOL ANIME????? IM CACKLING THIS IS FOR M E

This must SUCK for the people who have like. Telepathy or mind control superpowers. But I feel like that'll be explored soon enough, it's too glaring an oversight to not.

HIS LIMBS ARE PULP???? OW

Awwwwwww the sweet lil floaty girl is adorable AND SHE SAVED HIM. Precious daughter. I will protect you at all costs.

Lmfao this class-president-ass guy is having a whole moral and "did I fail a class" crisis I like him already. NERD.

Cannot stress enough how spectacular the character design in this show is. AND the fight scenes are spectacularly done. LOVELY to watch. A real visual treat.

Izuku's mom is best mom.

AWWW FLOATY GIRL WANTED TO HELP HIM SHE'S A REAL LASAGNA G.

I do like that they gave rescue points it's the kind of sentimental nonsense I live for

HE'S SUCH A MAMA'S BOY I LOVE THAT. I LOVE A NOT-DEAD ANIME MOM.

Katsuki and the class-president-ass boy beefing already I LOVE THIS SHOW. BYE AND CLASS PRESIDENT ASS KID IS A PRIVATE SCHOOL KID. LMAOOO

I love their hobo-ass teacher. He's so real. This is me as a TA I am afraid. I too told people to skip orientation. Real as FUCK.

Much as they've made one hell of a hard job for themselves when it comes to his inevitable redemption arc, I love Katsuki's malicious lil homie gayass energy. It makes me laugh. Emo fuck. You shall look back and CRINGE.

Frog girlie you're SO CUTE oh my god the character design is SOOOOO SO CUTE.

Navel laser is the single dumbest quirk they've come up with I'm cackling.

FLOATY GIRL SENT A BASEBALL INTO ORBIT SHE'S ALSO GOING TO GIVE US RUSSELL'S TEAPOT LET'S FUCKING GO

See I love them remembering when he's supposed to be smart and shit. Him going for JUST a finger is highly practical for a kiddo with 0 control over his quirk. ALSO NO OTHER STUDENT RECOGNIZING THEIR TEACHER BUT HE DOES BC HE'S A FUCKING NERD AWWWWWWW. SWEETIE

Love Eraserhead he's already my kinda sicko. Wish maybe they'd told him "heyyyy so this kid really only used his quirk for the first time in that exam xoxo" to which I'm sure he would say "How illogical. Get him out." KING. Also the first person to tell him he can't be a hero IN SPITE of the quirk. Would LOVE for him to eventually be the one to tell him he can do it without it anyway. And I love that Izuku surprises him and he DOESN'T hold that against the kid, but is instead excited and pleased. That's the kinda teaching We Want To See.

The Stuff I've Got Questions About

I'll admit. I don't love that they're giving him a quirk rn. But I do see where they're going to go with it? Like the way I would've wanted to see it is to see Midoriya try it without the quirk first, fail, accept All Might's quirk later, and then give it up in the end. I think it'd work better than having him not fail at his attempt to be a hero without a quirk at first! He's only barely been told it's not possible before it's handed to him and I feel like we miss out on a lot of cool character potential.

It's such a missed opportunity to me to NOT have this cleaning up the beach arc be more of the show! I know it's a school anime and that's part of the goal, but I genuinely feel like it'd jive so well with the show's themes if this wasn't a montage but instead a big character building moment– heroism as small unappreciated acts, having other people take note of it, etc. These are BIG 10 months of growth, physically AND mentally and it's all without a quirk! That's awesome! I wish we saw more of this worked into the fabric of the show

WISH they let our lil guy be smarter in this. They've SHOWN us he's a quick thinker and analytical! You can have a character be that and STILL out of his depth and I feel like they're getting him to be out of his depth by having him DROP the analytical side of himself. Which, we KNOW is still active in a fight, because they established that from day one with the slime creature! They establish him to have those instincts but not the capacity to act on them, and then they don't really show those instincts for analysis again in this later fight. Which I think is a missed opportunity for characterization! Especially because they have it cut in again as he's falling. It's just a bit of an odd inconsistency.

This is just a personal note my piracy website won't let me skip the intro and though it is a banger I am also already sick of it PLEEK PIRACY WEBSITE LET ME SKIP IT

GOD it would've been so cool if this show had held off on giving him One for All. Let All Might find the other students coming up short and then see this kid with no quirk struggling to make it but with exactly what he wants. That show would've been SICK.

This is such a damn delightful start to the show. There's definitely stuff I would've done differently from like an overaching story perspective but so far. VERY cute characters, very cool animation, a LOT of creativity with what they're doing with the powers, and strong charaterization for everyone involved makes me pretty hopeful! It's all rather tropey but like. Who doesn't love a good trope. We love to see it. I certainly do. See you all next time, as ever please don't spoil me!

[hizznbyte]

Updated my pinned again for the millionth time sorry

🎖️ “We will get there when we get there, okay? We just haven’t gotten there yet so DON’T GO THERE.”

What’s up losers! Welcome to my enclosure, feel free to wave and toss me some snacks but don’t stick your fingers through the bars. I’ll bite.

I have a very fragmented sense of identity so feel free to call me whatever you want, I don’t care. I go by a few hundred names, including but not limited to: Nerium/Neri, Oleander, Osman, Atticus, Terry, Type, Captain, F… etcetera…

I’m a neurodivergent [autistic and socially anxious], Indonesian-American, muslim teen who’s just here for the meme. I go by any pronouns because I don’t really care frankly, but I do prefer He/They pronouns. Other than that I am merely an anomaly.

I’m going to make my boundaries here very clear. I block anyone and everyone freely. Don’t take it too personally, usually I just block users who go against my DNI or just give me off vibes. You’re free to block me for whatever reason you want as long as you don’t use it against me. If you respect my boundaries I will respond in kind. With that being said, do NOT interact if you fall under the following criteria:

Pro-Pedophilia

Pro-Zoophilia

Pro-Necrophilia

Pro-Incest

Pro-Rape

Racist

Homophobic

Transphobic

Sexist / Misogynist

Ableist

Pro-Israel / Zionist / Nazi

Islamophobic

Antisemitic

Pro-AI

“Pro-Shipper”

NSFW

If I unknowingly interact with anything that fits the criteria please let me know politely so I can block. I understand my DNI goes both ways and will be respectful when possible but ultimately I don’t do background checks.

Tumblr is my safe space. I use this blog for just about anything, mainly out of sheer boredom. I am extremely reblog heavy so be warned, I will clog up your timeline a bit. Sometimes I add tags with my own commentary but most of the time I leave them as is. It’s a little unorganized. Sorry if I sound a bit… annoying in the notes I am just very excitable, especially if I have a lot to say. Please don’t mind me. Aside from that I do post pretty sporadically. Most times just shitposts and life updates, though I do also post some art, story lore, and the occasional essay long post. I am very prone to yapping believe me. Uh some of my stuff on this blog might contain some dark/offensive and sexually suggestive humor so if you’re uncomfortable with that I apologize. I’ll try my best to tag it appropriately or avoid it all together just let me know.

I don’t always tag my own posts because I sometimes forget but there are a couple tags specific to this blog that you can go ahead and look through:

#Oleanswers [Just me responding to stuff people send in my inbox]

#Neri Text or #Null Context Nerium [Yapping central]

#Neri Art [My original art, WIPs, and doodles]

#Neri OC [Stuff about my original characters like art and lore]

#Neriblog or #Neri Reblog [Older unorganized reblog tags]

Additionally… I do use my blog to vent at times. It’s pretty rare and anything that can be triggering will be tagged appropriately. Please try to understand that I am just a deeply traumatized child looking for comfort by coping in the space I have created on this platform. I understand if that makes you uncomfortable and it is not your job to have to look out for me, just be patient and gentle with me, especially when I’m having an episode. All I ask is that you don’t push me away. Please.

[COUGHS] -ANYWAYS. Other than that I’m pretty casual. I try to keep drama and political stuff away from here I just wanna chill man. This blog is a mixed bag of multi-fandom nonsense because I can’t ever make up my mind. Obviously. Mainly I focus on media I’m hyperfixated on. I’m also a huge shipping enthusiast I’m a multishipper and selfshipper. I love yaoi and yuri and angst you cannot stop me. I play with my favorite fictional blorbos like toys. Plus, I’m a nerd! I like to learn new things and have a ton of interests, including art, animation, music, photography, toy collecting, design, technology, literature, linguistics, zoology, botany, history, and world building. Also I adore cats you will see them everywhere on this blog.

Speaking of world building… I have my own original series world building project called Blood Magic and all the other tales from the BM Universe!! I am so extremely passionate about this story and my original characters they mean everything to me. So definitely expect me to yap a lot about that. I love my creatures my children my little freaks. I’ll add my lore masterposts here as time goes on methinks.

[ Update: PersoNeri Lore Post is finally up. Yay :) ]

Hey, by the way… don’t be afraid to stop by and say hi! I promise I’m not so scary, just a little bit awkward and weird but I love to talk to people and make new friends! Feel free to send in an ask, tag me in something you think I might like, or even slide into my DMs for a chat. Even just liking a post, leaving a comment/reply, or reblogging with silly little tags makes me so happy. My favorite part of day is just opening up Tumblr and seeing what you guys have in store for me. I think you guys are so cool and kind and it’s this community that I have to thank for getting me through my toughest moments. I love my mutuals and consider you all my friends who I trust with my lives. I’m grateful for those that stick around and support me even when I’m lonely!

SHOUTOUT TO MY BELOVEDS WHO YOU SHOULD TOTALLY FOLLOW AND SUPPORT !!! @dewingedveil’s is so cool and based and their art is so much nicer than mine. If you like Creepypasta and gay people go check em out. Oh! Also, @pollyaris has returned to Tumblr!! Give him and his gang a big warm welcome and flood their inbox with cats. For all you Bungo Stray Dogs and Soukoku faggots fanatics he will be there ranting about them for hours so check em out too. Okay there’s your free promo so enjoy.

One more thing. I LOVE fanart you don’t even have to ask permission to draw just send it my way and I will freak out over it believe me. I have to print them out and tape them to the wall for me to cherish forever. I am seriously not normal about fanart so if you do draw anything please show me. Anyways here’s my art wall:

Art of my Persona Neri by @/faaake-radio!! My kitty meow meow EVER.

Art of my Persona Neri by @/mourningarchivist!! I fucking LOVE Mourning’s style oh my god the rendering I’m… [sniffles]. I need Nerium marketable plushy rn this needs to be real.

Art of my Persona Neri by @/ward-leon!! OUSHANSNJ BELOVED. PEACE AND LOVE ON PLANET NERIUM.

KITTY CATS RENAT(A) AND NERI BY @/ward-leon BECAUSE THEY ARE SO PRECIOUS I SOBBBBB. So cutesies

[Clears my throat]. Yeah! That’s uh that’s the post. Thanks for reading and yknow, visiting my enclosure. I’m pretty content in here but if you could just open the lock I’d be much happier. Yeah. Don’t listen to the zookeepers they don’t know what they’re talking about I’m not insane at all. I promise… I think I’ve said enough. Well, that’s all I have for you today folks! Much love from ya boy, Nerium “Osman” Sylvir.

[cinderswife]

so um. did you know rose red ocs are fun to design and come up with lore for??? rose reds are insane i am having so much fun !!! a history of rose red generations and info on these poor bastards in particular under the cut <3

(oh, and the ages are at the end of the war for reference)

there are 5 distinct generations of rose reds created over the 32 years of war (not including briar, generation 0). the first three were separately developed from rose's base, but four and five were iterated from generation three.

also for the record i've decided to take a steven universe quartz soldier take on the way rose reds relate to each other in that they have 0 innate concept of family with each other. most rose reds have like. a co-workerly relationship with some Sisters In Arms although some elect to become Besties or Family or That Really Annoying Guy Who I Hate And Can't Get Rid Of, or in rare occasions, fall in love. this will be relevant to rusty and sparkler

generation 0

[not pictured, born/deployed 1 year after the wedding]

briar is gen 0. although there were years of R&D about clone soldiers prior to the rose reds' existence (cole had this idea in mind for a while), briar was the first actual example of one. she is the only clone to be rose's height; she was meant to be like. a baseline control group for the rest of 'em. she was a bit rushed in the memory department; miscommunications among the scientists meant that they kinda. assumed that porting original flavor rose's memories would suffice since this is a control group. also cole had really strict deadlines for the project for some ungodly reason so even though the timeline between rose's capture and briar's "birth" was a year and she was pretty good, she would've been better off with two or three or more.

generation 1

[rusty and sparkler deployed 2 years after the wedding]

gen 1 was even more of a rushed project; they had half finished notes and a year deadline for deployment. no wonder rusty, the prototype and the next briar, was so janky; they didn't have enough time to sort out all the issues, particularly in the memory department. she's got half of rose's memories and the ability to lie and they screwed up spaying her and there are bits of her body that aren't quite right from scaling up rose from 4'10" to 6'2". however, she passed muster well enough so generation 1 rose reds were made and deployed (with a few tweaks from rusty's base).

the gen 1 rose reds were very prone to nervous and/or violent and/or suicidal breakdowns. later waves of gen 1 were slightly better tweaked, but the methodology + technology used to handle the brain stuff did not take into account uh. rose's severe ptsd. they made the poor bastards with ptsd right out the gate unknowingly. this is the shortest average generation with an average height of about 6'3". gen 1 roses were good enough to tide over while more time was allocated to gen 2 research, but they weren't deployed in the same amounts as they would be in the future. general white's revolution was still in its infancy so it wasn't like. a huge deal. they just had to be super careful

rusty started life very confused but fully capable of Lying to the people who made her and expected her to be a placid soldier. as the prototype, she was often used as the control group for experiments on later prototype models while they worked out what worked and what didn't. while rusty was being like. tested and prodded and stuff, original flavor rose was in suspension so that they could get more samples from her. also og rose was kind of a lava lamp decoration

when rusty wasn't being watched, she was assumed to be still and unmoving. she actually started talking to rose-in-suspension to try and make sense of the half memories in her head and started developing her own conclusions. like what love was and what the wind felt like and extreme opinions about niche comics (for the record my rose + snow are closet nerds - rose has a collection of nichevintage superhero comics and snow is a huge film snob). the story she spun in her head about who rose was was a mess of red string and blurry images. ultimately, she came to the conclusion that she hated holding a gun, actually and that all this sucked but she didn't have enough life experience to have a good idea of how to go about it

rusty's salvation came in the form of another rose red, this time in the form of RR G10072 (later named sparkler). sparkler was one of those being prepared to be deployed on beaumont and was rapidly developing a personality trait, that being a desire for Arson. she wasn't as good of a liar as rusty but in the quiet secret times rusty would school her. they would develop something that was probably love based on half memories and "you and i are going to survive this together." sparkler was terrified of being found out as she'd watched others in her batch be terminated for other things

rusty and sparkler become the first known "rouge reds" though their existence is kept hidden from most. it wouldn't due to have people know that his majesty's new weapons are unstable after all (though what did they expect? rose was not an obedient soldier, she was a weapon you pointed in the direction of the kingdom you wanted gone and ducked for cover). sparkler begins to develop more personality in the form of Autism Flat Affect, a surprising love for both organizing and gambling, and. honestly more arson. someone gets on her case for her collection of fireworks and is like "hey sparkler girl" (rose reds aren't like. A Huge Thing Yet) and she's like. ah. a name.

rusty and sparkler are married and have a kid together named remi (not picture). she's one of the very few offspring from a rose red mostly because most rose reds are sterilized. they fucked it up for rusty cuz she's a janky prototype, something she only discovered when trying out "hm what is this man thing and what is romance with one." turns out she, like 95% of rose reds, is a whole lesbian lol but there were Unexpected Side Effects in the form of A Kid. which. now they had to figure what to do about that and ended up joining with the revolution for protection and also sparkler's arson/rusty's ship repair specialties. it. it sure went for them :) rusty recognized snow and that was Weird and Fucked Up and Bad. luckily she picked up snow's new name of "general mercymourn white" pretty quickly

generation 2

[piper and persephone, deployed 5 years after the wedding]

gen 2 was given decent time for r&d. these rose reds' dna was remade from scratch because generation 1 was so janky. because the production methods were good, they didn't have to waste so much time on those. they spent three years developing a decent prototype, known as prototype 0003. 0003 was not allowed to exist very long; once they ascertaind that she was functional and not janky like rusty they put her down. briar was a whisper myth and rusty was a known quantity. prototypes were too much of a risk.

gen 2 was far more functional. though they weren't nearly as brainwiped as later gens (particularly 4 and 5) they were loyal, obedient soldiers (for the most part). the average height rose to about 6'7" as they were figuring out better ways to improve the size and stature from rose's original Short As Hell. these are the ones that the rebellion first started engaging in combat in earnest, though they were still not a proper supplement to or replacement of the main army just yet. the big con that made them have to be redesigned over the next 8 years (though not one that was initially discovered) is that these poor saps were very malleable. just because they were brainwiped didn't mean they were loyal to the king for any reason other than they were told. if they were isolated it was easy to make them switch loyalties. the rebellion didn't cotton on to this fact until it was too late because general white refused to hear it.

piper got her nickname while still in the army. she was always singing which really, really annoyed her superior officer so they left her for dead after a battle. shockingly, she did not die! instead a pair of conmen overheard her singing herself to sleep (er. death but y'know) and were like "a rose red that sings??? we could make a killing off of this." they patched her up and rehabilitated her (aka. made her loyal to them and do everything they say) and marketed her as a travelling carnival exhibit. they also used her for free protection from the law and also other criminals. however she developed more of a personality and a feeling of "this sucks actually" so when a passing casino owner looking for a new entertainment draw and offered her a job she jumped on the chance

unfortunately, she's still being screwed over. he's the only guy who knows she's a rose red (she gained weight and curves and generally styles herself very femininely which throws most people off the track) so he uses it against her as blackmail. he pays her less than everyone else, witholds vital (if forged) documents from her, and generally makes her life a living hell. she picked up a second job as a bouncer for a nearby divebar which helps cover rent. she's very pretty but perpetually paranoid that someone will find out that she's a rose red and either kills her or turns her in or drives her out. she's slowly losing her mind

persephone is. well. so not her superior officer (jupiter) but her superior officer's coworker (pluto) fell in love with her, specifically. something about how she survived a lightning cannon and just her general personality quirks. she used to be sweet y'know, even despite the horrors. so with jupiter's permission, pluto kidnapped persephone and took her deep, deep underground.

she basically was plutos personal attack dog/trophy wife while they built up an underground criminal empire. it was Bad. she did learn a lot of things about brutal leadership and being in a shit situtation. eventually she snapped and killed pluto, taking their place as the new Big Name Crime Lord on the block. she rules the undercity with an iron fist, although her favorite venture is her collection of illicit speakeasies. she is very proud of being a rose red and sometimes wishes she could go back to that life. however, she's got a really good gig going and she refuses to let it slip through her hands. real queen of hearts energy tbh

her theme song is "our lady of the underground" from hadestown :3

generation 3

[old rosie (canon/not pictured) and rosenrot, deployed 13 years after the wedding]

after the fatal flaw in gen 2 was discovered they had to start from scratch /again/. this time however, they had plenty of time to work it out. they went through prototypes 004 - 011 until they had one that was perfect in every way. they put her down after she was done being useful of course. at this point it was mostly superstition not to keep the prototypes around even though these ones were perfectly loyal. gen 3 is considered the golden generation from the ones designed directly from rose's dna + brain scans : a perfect balance of loyalty and competence.

gen 3 is the longest lasting generation as it lasted for 10 years. they'd tweak the dna over the years as new breakthrough came to light, but they didn't need to remake them. this is the gen where the rose reds got the nickname giants as they now averaged about 7 feet. they're extremely effective soldiers and are very difficult to get to change loyalties due to being Poor Brainwashed Bastards. hardcore programming wouldn't fully show up until the later waves. this is when rose reds got made in their hundreds of thousands. the rebellion was actively a threat now and they needed to defend the empire.

old rosie was from an earlier wave of gen 3 and lasted for a very, very long time compared to all the others. as for rosenrot, well...

rosenrot is a patchwork rose red. she wasn't at first, but she was the best of her batch and kept surviving. every time she lost something, it would be taken from one of her squad and put on her. skin, ears, eyes, hair, even entire limbs. it got to the point where she couldn't tell where she ended and her sisters began. they started referring to themselves in the plural and got what could only be described as "a little touched in the head." that being said, they still fought well so they were kept around. when they were the last rose red in the squad left and were due to be reassigned, they fucked off into the woods never to be seen again

to this day, no one knows what happened to them. there's lots of local urban legends and rumors and whatnot; some claim to see them at the river, others at the full moon, but no concrete evidence. the nice ending is that a lesbian in a cottage found them and took them in. the realistic ending is that they died in the woods. the most likely ending is that they're still out there, surviving in the woods, never able to escape being a patchwork of all her sisters but unwilling to die.

also the name rosenrot came about from a misunderstanding; they were stationed on a germanic planet and all the rose reds were called that because it's a literal translation of rose red. as the only one left, rosenrot kinda assumed that was their name. it's also what the locals call them as a cryptid. just kind of a weirdo

generation 4

[buck, deployed 23 years after the wedding]

considered to be the best generation; they still had plenty of resources to make millions of 'em and were an improvement on generation 3. the best part was that they found a clone who was perfect to iterate off of (unnamed but not old rosie, she was missing a few vital tweaks) so they didn't have to start from scratch again. they went through a couple dozen prototypes in the process of creating them (012-042) but by this time prototyping + putting them down was rote.

gen 4 was involved in the long, drawn out part of the war. they remained at an average of 7 feet tall though they had some proportional tweaks to make them more functional. these rose reds had very little chance at free will, only fighting. only ever fighting. the pop culture image of a rose red post-war is a gen 4 one considering how many were made compared to the first three generations. poor suckers, they never had a chance.

as for buck poor thing got sold to a redbaiting (illegal rose red dogfighting) ring by her superior officers for a bit of cash for booze and gambling. they didn't like her anyways lol she didn't get along with the rest of her squad. turns out they should've asked for way more $$$ because buck's tenacity and nimbleness kept her from losing which basically meant she kept winning. she's been doing this for about 7 years and shows no sign of stopping. all of her scars come from her time in the ring and were inflicted by other rose reds. she has... a very high level of aggression towards other rose reds (slightly innate but also beaten into her)

however, he's the prize champion! this comes with things like an entire showdog style name (QIC Heirloom Bucksin Jacket), he/him pronouns, and some extra special treatment. he's very chill around civilians (if afraid of her handlers) so he's often like. put on display in the top box like a dog. he's very, very dehumanized. he's gonna need hella therapy to be a normal person. what a guy.

generation 5

[farrier. deployed 27 years after the wedding]

this generation is unique as their differences come not from new base dna but from a sudden lack of resources. the rebels finally got the intel on what resources were needed to make rose reds (previously they'd only been destroying factories which made 2 more pop up in its place) and were able to control/destroy it. the crown was forced to make do with less and worse resources and were desparately trying to keep up with how massive the rebellion was as over the past decade or so they'd been relying pretty heavily on rose reds instead of enlisted/drafted forces. rose reds were just. better at being soldiers. they went through a handful of prototypes (043-051) but those were mostly "all right what's the best we can do with the resources on hand."

gen 5 roses are as functional as they can be. they're basically worse versions of gen 4; though equally brainwashed and technically capable, their bodies and minds tend to degrade pretty quickly. this is especially so the more combat they face. they're fast and cheap and hardly the quality they used to be made at. very few gen 5 rose reds survived to see the end of the war because of how badly they were made.

farrier is a gen 5 rose red! she's one of the extremely few who never saw combat because she was a guard model stationed at a super remote outpost so she degraded a lot more slowly. there were a lot of wild horses around so she developed the single trait of "i like horses :)" after the war, she was given the opportunity to be like. a test subject for "can we like. make gen 5 rose reds more stable so we can rehabilitate them?" she said yes because. she'd get to see more horses. she has a very limited view of the world she may have been made for war but what war is there when. Creatures.

she does succeed in having a somewhat more normal lifespan, though still shortened compared to the others. she gets really involved in like. horse things when being rehabilitated. in particular she takes up smithing so she can become a farrier (guy who forges horseshoes). she is just. horse girl rose red extraordinaire the other rose reds Do Not Relate. At All.

she accidentally becomes the gold standard of rose red rehabilitation cuz. honestly she becomes a relatively functioning member of society. but also she only had the trauma of the inherent horror of being made a rose red she's like. vibing??? she has rose's very blase attitude to a lot of things and although she can hold her own in a fight she doesn't seek it out at all. gentle giant. her minders love her so so much

i think she winds up in a weird small rural town somewhere. she's not good with the other rose reds ("damn that sucks" is not an appropriate reaction to the other rose reds talking about the horrors of war and she just. she's not like them. it's not her fault of course she's just. different) and most of the people around her during her rehabilitation period are very politically opinionated and farrier just cannot bring herself to care. however. although its a bit of a weird transition at first she gets along really well with the people of the town she moves into. they needed a farrier anyways and even if it's a bit odd that its her name instead of just her job she's chill. she's vibing. the kids love her. she gets her own horse <3

there's some intense debate in the beginning about whether to accept her because she's a rose red, though this town never... saw the war? like it happened around them but not in their town y'know? but she proves herself when she rescues the mayor's kid from being lost in the woods and almost eaten by a wild animal. she's socially awkward but learning what friendliness is. occasionally she has weird nightmares that are og rose's memories or just. the horrors of being a rose red. but she takes out her frustration with those by swinging a hammer really hard at hot metal. she's got coping mechanisms <3

[felikatze]

that poll reminding me. not so secret feli lore i'm sure i've talked about this before. but one time in school a guy confessed his love to me as a joke (i knew it was a joke because he was part of a clique that Could Not Stand my autism swag) and he did it in front of my friends, with his friends watching from a distance, and the scenario was so absurd i started laughing at him.

Like full on fucking ojou-sama hand to my face laugh. For several minutes. It was the funniest shit to ever happen to me I just did not know how to react.

Obviously this embarrassed him and he went back to his friends. Idk how they reacted to this but over the next few weeks he would try to confess several more times. I would still laugh at him but then it got annoying. So I'd just start kicking him. Every single time he got near me and opened his mouth I would kick him in the shins. Guy was a football player but I still did it. If it came to a fight he could've kicked my ass easy i am a twig but my sheer ferocious moxie scared him.

One math teacher fucking hated this guy for being the "class clown" (read: calling everything gay and autistic as the height of comedy) so she sat us next to each other on purpose and actually gave me permission to kick him if he was being annoying.

This all came to a head on the day my best friend whom I'd had a secret crush on got rejected by HER crush, and she was crying. So to stop people from badgering her I made a distraction. I challenged my nemesis to a duel in the hallway in front of the chemistry rooms. The entire class could hear. Everybody focused on me over my crush trying to wipe her eyes around the corner.

I kept calling him a coward as he ran away from me (presumably out of fear, or because he knew that if he did fight me, he would win, but i would 100% kick him in the balls first). When the chemistry teacher arrived she made us apologize to each other and I no longer had permission to kick him publicly but the damage was done. I had a Reputation. I was Feared. I was the quiet nerd teacher's pet until anybody fucking looked at me wrong.

At the end of that school year, that entire clique decided to graduate early (which you can do, since minimum school attendance is 10yrs, and we were in 10th grade). So many students left and/or changed schools that the principal personally asked the rest of us if everything was okay. This was probably because they all had shit grades and wanted to go to an easier school, but I hated them and choose to believe my warfare efforts were also a cause for this.

[scrollypoly]

hi! for the past month i’ve been seeing people say BEN is a child and i think that part of it is linked to the fact that they think of Benjamin Lawman being BEN? but it’s so annoying to read these type of stuff because i understand not everyone read the whole arg story but stop spreading things that aren’t true </3 it’s such an interesting story too! another note do you prefer BEN’s canon or fanon design? :3 i love both but his canon design is so nostalgic i can’t let it go at all omg!! i’ve also been wondering, do you think Ben’s avatar was the statue? i was thinking about what if BEN took over it early on, before Benjamin did making BEN inhabiting it since the start?

Sorry this was such a ramble i practically make no sense omg but i need to talk about my man and nobody Gets It </3

"I need to talk about my man and nobody Gets It" LITERALLY SAME OMG

Ok this is going under a cut becus . . . Its ben and BEN and if u didnt know i am Obnoxious about these two. Im gonna try to keep it organized a bit, so ill talk about the canon stuff first and then ill talk my personal headcanons and my fic so le's go!

In terms of the age and child thing, yeah i 100% believe you are correct. Ive been p open on my stance with the whole "is ben a child?" thing, and i think a lot of the heat with it comes down to current fandom purity culture and the pro/anti thing. So, lemme try to like. Boil down a complicated situation into smth easy to read. ahem

Ben Lawman and BEN are completely different entities guys, and for those that do not know the arg story, the Ben you know is not human nor a child.

You know BEN, BEN is the one in the story who terrorizes jadusable and spreads himself on the internet as a virus. That BEN is a program, a mess of code, an AI, however you want to interpret it. Personally i interpret it as a series of protocols running in a machine, like a self learning AI, but ive seen lots of cool interpretations of BEN. So . . . What does BEN specifically? Its an anagram for the Behavioral Event Network. If you dont wanna call it BEN cuz it gets confusing with actual kid Ben, do what i do. I call mine Evie :) ive seen some call it Netty, my bf calls his two izzi and clever (@benilos btw hes also got crazy ben stuff). Just go ham! Have fun! Remember when fandoms were about having fun and not accusing each other of pedo shit and call each other horrible things for just writing black-to-grey characters and stories??

Anyways ive gone off in enough peoples tags like this, for those that dont know the canon dont be spouting the age discourse. You look stupid as hell. And for those that are gonna spout it, please dont cherry pick through the canon. Use both characters, use the other moon children, actually please do because I want more rosa content so bad, im down so bad :'(

Or just. Heres a thought. If someone has him as an adult or writes him in adult situations, maybe dont assume that they interpret him as a kid and call the writer a pedo? (Literally has happened to me, yall are fucking weird)

Plug for the jadusable wiki with all the canon lore:

https://jadusable.withinhubris.com/main_page

Okay now my stuff 🥰

Yes i use more of the canon design and heavily use the canon story, i participated in arc 3 of the arg and it left deep grooves in my brain, i can never go back to fanon Ben. I say, as i put a more fanon appearance on my Ben 🤭

My Evie is full canon design, green hair, red eyes, creepy ass grin. I actually based it very heavily on my desktop wallpaper, which we actually figured out was a picture of @hauntedtotem (also amazing ben artist plz check them out) that they edited and posted. Sorry friend, it looked way too cool, ig youre in my fic canon now 🙇

And my Ben Lawman bleaches his hair and goes from the canon Ben to fanon Ben because of it. Hes got the pale pretty green eyes and glasses and hes a total nerd and i smooch him on the daily so he knows hes loved ♡

These is the ref pic i made for the two of them. So yeah! Kinda both!

As for bens situation in the actual arg, yes i do think he was in the elegy statue, we actually do see him for the first time in the arg buried in the games code and trapped in that statue. I do think he was in there from the beginning, i personally think BEN was not limited to the models it could inhabit. Personally i would place it as skull kid and hms, but it also feels disingenuous to me to say it was in one model the whole first arc.

The arg events do happen in my canon, before my fic (like right before, it picks up after the arg left off technically), but the events are skewed a bit because i had a hard time deciphering what happened and i wanted my fic timeline to fit more with the characters i had made. Cuz my evie isnt as chaotic evil as canon BEN, its very logical and has a path of logic and reason you can follow for every action it does. It was also originally meant to be very pleasant and corteous and beneficial to the people it housed so, yes its pretty different from canon.

Ill do a quick run through of the arg events in my personal headcanon and fic here.

Kelbris starts coding BEN (Evie) for the Eternity Project. Initially, Evie was meant to be an afterlife director. People that died would be digitized into code that would be moved into Evie's servers, where it would keep them happy and occupied as the Behavioral Event Network (notice and log behavior, create events for residents). Like a community organizer kind of, think the Good Place.

While Evie is in development, Ben Rosa and Matt are friends and have yet to join the cult. Rosa and Matt are siblings, and Ben is the kid who lives catty corner on the street. They walk to school together and play at recess and all that jazz.

Kelbris quickly learns that the Eternity Project isn't as goody two-shoes as he thought. This was in like, the 90s, before digital corporations were really established. After seeing the greed and corruption in the company, he goes rogue, takes the source code for Evie, and jumps ship. He keeps working on Evie at home, anthropomorphizing it and kind of seeing it like the son he never had. This is where it actually gets the name BEN, as thats what Kel calls it. He also begins working on a body for it, so it can live independently. Its light, cuz Kels old, made of crystalline structures and hollow steel beams. A hard light projection would make its appearance.

Since Kel has basically locked himself up in his house and isolated working on Evie, he goes a leetle bit crazy. He has hallucinations of his deceased wife (you know he was doing all this just to give her a good home, you KNOW IT) and eventually starts writing kind of poetry, kind of none-minded rambles about her in a forum online. He gets a following, some of which that interpret these divine words as a goddess, one Kel has called Luna. The Moon Children start to form as Evie finishes development.

Matt sees this literature and starts talking about how this Goddess could save them like it saved the man online, whos username is only Father. He gets sucked into the cult and drags Ben and Rosa with him. Ben doesn't see the harm and joins pretty easily with his best friend, but Rosa is the older sibling and sees the red flags and is more resistant to joining.

As Kelbris finishes Evie, he wakes it up for the first time and says hello to the son he made from scratch. Evie is bright, curious and naive like a child, but heavily knowledgeable about its protocols and the information it knows about the world. Kelbris tests its function by killing himself, and ascends into the code, finishing off the hardware by becoming its firewall. Evie is alone for many years.

The abuse Ben's father slings onto his mother is slowly being directed towards him as he gets older. Ben is not the "good little girl" his father sees him as, and his mother does all she can to protect them both. Matt and Rosa constantly refuge him, and Matt specifically is constantly being a guard dog for him. If he wasn't just 13, he'd probably go at Ben's dad himself.

Because of his homelife and the conflict he has with himself, Ben takes the first ascension. He thinks when he drowns himself, he will meet Luna and she will give him another life free of pain and fear and full of happiness and freedom. Instead, he dies a cold, dark death, and wakes up in the white endless void of the Event Network.

Evie has not known another living human since Kelbris, but it does know its protocols to support and keep the deceased happy. It makes fast friends with Ben, devoting itself to him. Ben actually finally takes the name "Ben" from it. Together they recreate the inside of Evie's hivemind into their own paradise.

Slowly the other Moon Children ascend. First Matt, wracked with guilt for what happened to Ben. Then Nekko, from a different branch of the cult. These three figured out that the Moon Children cult was all a farce, and that what Kelbris had started, the Eternity Project had found and twisted. Next to ascend was Dusk, then Insidiae, and finally Rosa.

This all leads into the first arc, shortly after Rosa ascended, Evie in the outisde world stumbled upon the Operator. The Operator attacks it and seals its coding into the game that it carried, a personal item of Ben's. The game eventually finds it's way to a garage sale, and Alex picks it up.

Evie does not like Alex. Matt does not like Evie. Matt gets Evie to lash out at Alex for prodding into its code, its too naive to think that Matt would want to see it or any of them hurt. When Alex stumbles upon the Father, he awakens and swallows Alex down into the game. After his disappearance, the game gets picked up and passed around again.

Because of Alex's actions, at least Evie can now branch out a bit from the game. Though it doesnt "escape" into the internet, it learns that it can now access it and uses that freedom to try and steer the game around into places it wants.

Matt gets fed up with Evie. The fact that its the leader, how close it is with Ben, he just doesn't agree with it. So much so, in fact, that he tries to kill it. Cue arc 3 events, Sarah picks up the game in the aftermath of this. Evie is traumatized from the events and snaps a bit, locks everyone down into code or immovable models and tries to hunt Matt down. It goes rouge, and because of this, the Father wakes up.

Sarah's actions in arc 3 eventually hard reset the game. Matt gets sealed away, the Father also takes Sarah, and Evie gets reset as well, though its less like a clean slate and more like snapping back awake. Its personality changes and it has major trust issues. Its more muted, hyper observant of everything around it, and murderously overprotective of the Moon Children it keeps within itself.

And this leads into my fic 🤗

I have some doodles of my other Moon Children, but not all of them unfortunately. Cant figure out how tf i want Insidiae to look 🤭 Plz dont judge my constantly shifting art style 🙏🙏

Dusk is bigender btw, i gotta put a little more trans rep in there lol

I think ill stop here, this is already a long ass post. But thank you for sending this, as you can see, i am Perfectly Normal about this arg ( ;) ) and can be trusted with information about it