#i am having the time of my life in this area only
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markrosewater · 2 days ago
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I want to speak out against the whole push towards DEI. I feel that ever since you made the push to make identity the forefront of a character it has hurt the stories you tell. Captain Sisay's race was never the focus of her character and she was a complete badass! And I fear if you did it over again Gerrard would be trans, black and disabled just because. It also cheapens the stories of world devastation when characters worry more about their gender than Bolas destroying everything.
The reason I started this blog is so we can have frank conversations about things, so please let’s talk about this.
Imagine if every time you turned on the TV or watched a movie, no one looked like you. For some of us, that’s never happened. We see ourselves constantly, so it’s hard to truly understand what not seeing yourself represented in media is like.
I do have a personal window to this experience. While I am white and male, there’s an area where I am the minority - my religion. Jews are just under two and a half percent of the US population. I have had many experiences where I’ve been in situations where everything is geared towards a group I do not belong to, and zero consideration is given that not everyone at that event is part of the majority.
You just feel invisible and like an outsider. It’s not a great feeling. And I just experience it a tiny portion of time, only things that are geared specifically towards something religious. Most minorities have this feeling all the time, whenever they’re outside their personal community.
Now imagine, after years of not seeing yourself ever, you finally see someone that looks like you, but nothing about the character rings remotely true. They don’t sound like you, they don’t act like you, the facts about their day-to-day life are just wrong. It’s clear whoever wrote the character didn’t truly understand the lived experience of the character, so the character feels fake.
You bring up Sisay. Michael Ryan and I didn’t technically create Sisay (she played a small role in the Mirage story), but we did do a lot to flesh out her character as the creators of the Weatherlight Saga. We turned her from a minor character into a major one.
And while I’m proud, in general, of our work on the Weatherlight Saga, I don’t think we did justice to Sisay as a character. Neither Michael nor I have any knowledge of what it’s like to be a black woman. Nor did we ever talk to someone who did.
And if you’re someone like us that has no knowledge of that experience, you probably didn’t notice. But that doesn’t mean it’s a good thing.
Imagine if we made a movie about your life, and we just made everything up. We invented people you never knew, we gave you a job you never had, and we had you say things you’d never say. The movie might even be a good movie, but your response would be, but that’s not my life - that’s not me.
Now imagine we put the movie out, and people that never met you assumed that was what you were like. When people met you for the first time, they assumed things, because, you know, they’d seen the movie.
That’s what misrepresenting people does. It not only makes them feel not seen, it falsely represents them, spreading lies, often stereotypes, making people believe things about them that aren’t true.
Our move towards diversity is just us trying to better reflect the world and the people in it. We’re trying to do to everyone else what a certain portion of people get every day without ever having to think about it.
But why are we “making it the forefront of their character”? We’re not. We’re making it a part of their character. But in a world where you’re not used to ever seeing it, it feels louder than it is. Things that are a natural part of the world that you’re used to feel like the background of the story because you understand the context to it.
If a man kisses his wife before going off to a battle, that’s not a big deal. It’s just a thing a husband might do to his wife when he leaves. It’s not the forefront of his character. It’s just part of his life. But you’ve seen it hundreds of times, so it feels normal.
When someone does something that isn’t your lived experience it pulls focus. It seems like a big deal, but only because it’s new to you. It’s just as mundane a thing to that character as the man kissing his wife is to him.
Even the turn “pushing” implies that it’s unnaturally here, that we’re forcing something that naturally shouldn’t be. But why? That thing exists naturally in the real world, and it doesn’t make the real world any less. Maybe you’re less aware of it, but is making you aware of how others live their life “pushing” something on you?
How you live your life is represented constantly, everywhere. Why isn’t over-representing your experience at the expense of everyone else’s “pushing” it? Why is media only being the experience of those in power the “proper way”?
Having more depth and variety doesn’t lessen stories. It makes them deeper, more rich, more nuanced. In short, it makes them better stories. In my former life, I was a professional writer. I took a lot of writing classes. One of the truism of writing is “speaking truth leads to better stories”.
There’s another famous quote: “When you’re accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.” You’re used to being over-represented, so being a little less over-represented feels like something has been taken from you. But really it hasn’t. Having a better sense of the rest of the world comes with a lot of benefits.
I’ll use food as an example. Let’s say all you were ever exposed to was the food of your heritage. Yeah, that food is really good, but sometimes isn’t it nice to eat foods of other nationalities? Isn’t your life better that you have a choice? Isn’t your exposure and access to the food of other nationalities a positive in your life?
Exposure to variety is a positive. It allows you to learn about things you didn’t know, experience things things you’ve never experienced, and get a better sense of understanding of your friends and neighbors.
Our actions are not to harm anyone, and if you think that’s what we’re doing, please take a minute to actually absorb what I’m saying. You’ve spent your whole life metaphorically eating one type of food, and we’re just trying to show you how much you’ve missed out on.
And while this might not impact you directly, we’re making a whole bunch of people felt seen. We’re bringing joy. Think of it this way. We make a lot of cards. Not every card is for you. But if it makes someone else happy, if they get to include it in a deck, and it makes Magic better for them, how is it harming you that we include it? You have so many cards that you can play.
To this poster or people that share their viewpoint, the narrative that a gain for someone else is an attack on you is just not true. As I just pointed out above, you play a game all about personal choice, about players getting to choose how they play and enjoy the game. Why should life be any different than Magic?
Thanks for reading.
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crescenthistory · 3 days ago
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hello carinaaaa !!!!! happy 2k :) u are one of the sole reasons for the resurfacing of my love for the marauders and i owe you my life for that truly…
could i request an argue for b5 with marlene mckinnon x reader? been thinking about bartender marlene far too often oh my lord… do you see my vision… reader who comes in once and marlene is teasing them all over the place and reader is like oh ok. i guess i am never drinking anywhere else ever again !!
one of the sole reasons?? baby that makes me so happy to hear, thank you so much for sharing<33 i most certainly see your vision and i'm in love with her
✶・•・✦・•・��・✶・•・✦・•・✶
i will ARGUE for prompt 5 "bar au" with marlene mckinnon
carina's 2k celebration
✶・•・✦・•・✶・✶・•・✦・•・✶
cw: fem!reader, use of y/n, alcohol (all characters of age), modern muggle au, flirty!marlene, somewhat shy!reader, background pandalily
wc: 1.2k
You could quite honestly kiss Lily for suggesting going to this place instead of the regular pub at the end of your neighbourhood.
It was quite typical that an all-girls bar would open up in your area and you wouldn't hear of it before months had passed, but alas, you were grateful to finally be in the know. Lily had stressed that it wasn't a sapphic bar officially, but that was often what developed once no men were allowed in.
Safe to say, you were giddy.
When you walked in with Mary, Lily and her girlfriend Pandora, who you were enjoying getting to know at last, you were expecting a fun night filled with giggles and perhaps a bit of flirtation. You were mostly just hoping to spend time with your dear friends and let loose in a safe environment that wasn’t one of your crammed flats. 
Which was exactly what you got, until it was your turn to head up to the bar. Pandora had gone for all three of you the first two rounds, whispering something in Lily’s ear afterwards, and when they turned to you with wide smiles asking you to head up, you honestly just thought it was the usual rotation. It’s only fair to share the burden of shouldering in through past all the tipsy girls strewn across the bar. 
Lily waved goodbye to you as you walked away with your list of orders in your phone, turning to giggle into Pandora’s side. You chalked it up to the first few rounds of pornstar martinis getting to your notorious lightweight of a friend.
You turned away from Lily with a smile on your face – and immediately collided into a solid yet soft surface. You almost stumbled at the impact, but two warm hands came up to stabalise your upper arms. 
“Whoa, hey there pretty girl.” In any other bar, the collison and that sentence might have instilled fear in you, but now you just looked up to be met with a wicked grin on the most beautiful blonde girl you had ever seen. She was close enough that the baby pink streaks in her hair splayed across your own shoulder, almost tickling you. She only smiled wider when she saw you staring. “You in a rush or something?”
“I’m so sorry, I was just on my way to the bar, but was looking at my friend over there instead and I–” 
You were rambling, cheeks increasingly heating up as the woman hadn’t stepped away from you. She looked over your shoulder where you had pointed and let go of one of your arms in favour of waving. “Your friend over there, Lily?”
Through any embarrassment and confusion, you perked up. “You know Lily?” 
“Yeah, we shared some classes in uni.” She looked back to you, smile taking on a lopsided quality. “That would make you the best friend, Y/N, right?”
You had to swallow your reaction at hearing her say your name. “That’s me,” you breathed out. Before you could continue with anything, she squeezed your arm and let go of you, stepping backwards.
“Well, princess, I’m Marlene. You wanted something from the bar?”
To your horror, when she steps away you see her wearing a bar shirt uniform, one of the tight black ones with the logo embroidered over your heart. She swept up some empty glasses on the way, looking over her shoulder to beckon you to follow after her. 
She had to know what she was doing to you as she floated away with you on a leash like this, but your head was too cloudy and heart beating too fast to care all that much to resist it. You just followed with a dazed smile, leaning on the bar as she slipped behind it. 
There were people lined up all around the bar, but when Marlene ducked behind it and put the glasses aside, she only looked at you.
“What can I get you then, beautiful?” 
She had this ability to look right into your sould and you had to bite your lip to keep your smile from exploding too obviously. Still, you had teh decency to look side to side a bit shyly. “Is there not a line I should be getting into?”
Marlene leaned in closer to you, giving you a conspiratory smile. “I’ll excuse it this once. Payment for knocking into you.”
You murmured something under your breath about “I think I was the one who bumped into you”, but you read the “humour me” plea in her eyes. You could probably read her every last thought with how close she was, and you couldn’t find it in you to mind.
“Lily and Dora wanted some pitchers for the table. Blue Lagoon and Purple Summer?” 
Marlene wrote the order down on a little notepad on the bar before her without ever taking her eyes off of you. It did funny things to your stomach. 
“And you, darling?”
“Could I get one of the house cocktails? The Midnight Princess?” You had no idea where this shyness in you was coming from, but for once it didn’t feel so awkward. It almost gave you some sort of rush.
Marlene grinned at you. “A princess for a princess coming right up.”
It was a marvel to watch how she moved about behind the bar, grabbing all the ingredients and mixing them together as she went. Expertly avoiding her colleagues as she snuck around, it was almost like watching a figure skater in her element. If her biceps flexed beneath her shirt as she shook the mixers, you didn’t take notice of course.
When Marlene placed your drink on the bar, she kept the two pitchers in her hands. Without a word, she pushed the bar open with her hip and passed through it to come over to you.
“Oh, Marlene you really don’t have to–”
She cut you off with a laugh, clearly endeared by your protests. “Oh but I want to. Believe it or not, it’s not every day I meet a girl as pretty as you.”
With warm cheeks and a dry throat, you made your way over to your table where you saw Lily and Pandora grinning widely at you already. Marlene followed close by, you could feel the warmth radiating off her body and heard the swooshing of the pitchers she held.
“Lils, Panda,” Marlene greeted as she placed the pitchers down on the table. She had stopped right beside you, almost as close as when you ran into her earlier. “Here’s your pitchers. You’ve got great taste.” She winked at Lily in a way that felt knowing, conspiratory.
Marlene then turned to you with a pleased smile. “Lovely meeting you, princess. Come up to the bar anytime you need me.”
With a quick press of her lips to your cheek, she was off. You stared after her for a second before letting your fingertips come up to ghost over your cheek.
When you turned to Lily’s hopeful smile, you were placing some pieces together. “That wasn’t normal service now, was it?”
Lily shrugged, as if she had no idea what she was talking about. “Told you you’d like it here.”
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wolfertinger · 5 hours ago
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Hello. Update.
So one of the very mentally unwell kids Majora used against me about a year ago (named AxoVrity) was a former fan, and has been obsessing over me for nearly a year due to Majoras bogus ass claims. They have been recruiting a bunch of gross nasty edge lord kids from the FNF MML/Naxicord community to try and dox, blackmail and extort me and it's gotten to the point where these kids are now threatening to call in fake school shooting/bomb threats at schools in my area under my legal name and they want to end my career and there's even been mentions of these kids wanting me killed. These kids have also extorted other kids to self harm themselves and take pictures of it as blackmail btw.
All because of Majoras fake ass claims, I have to deal with this shit.
I have already been in contact with the feds 4 times and local police 4 times.
And Majora? I'm gonna file a new report on you too. To my knowledge, 3 other reports (not done by me) have already been made.
This is the kind of shit that happens when you make false claims out of malice. All that's happened to you were ppl bringing up shit and evidence on you that you are actually guilty of. That you continue to lie about.
Because of you, I am being threatened by mentally unwell kids who make it a habit to push minorities to suicide and extort and blackmail ppl and swat ppl for "fun".
But yeah no. This is the kind of person Salem wants to befriend and platform?
Oh and don't say I'm making this up because I have a whole folder of evidence, screen shots, video of ppl making the threats, etc on hand that I had to give to police. And by God I ain't afraid to post the evidence for everyone to see what your lies have caused. But you're a victim right? Do us all a favor and log off for good.
I'm trying to fix my life, work on myself and do better. Fuck you. May you never know peace again in your life. And fuck your friends, too, you weird ass predator.
"Oh, and to add to my last submission, these kids are dead set on the idea I'm a pedo groomer and everything in between and that I deserve what's happening. And yet, there's no evidence of this being true at all. 🤔🤔🤔 Wonder where they all got that idea from? Gee, I wonder.
Sorry, one last thing I forgot to mention; this was confirmed to come back to Majora because one of my former fans, who's only 14 and was guilty of harassing me on Majoras behalf actually came forward to admit all that she knew because she started getting scared she would be targetted too.
Absolutely disgusting.
Oh and I'll publicly give info on this too: yes she did. She doxxed her ex gf that she still slightly obsesses over to this day and even stole her sona design and supposedly drew art/had art made of the sona being violently harmed. And I believe that last part because after I cut that loser off, she commissioned someone to draw cringe ass art of her sona biting a roaches head off with the lyrics to my song "Roaches" in the bg, but slightly altered. I don't have it on hand, but ask Ono. They'll have it saved. This mf is pathetic. It was the most embarrassing attempt at threatening me and being edgy that I'd ever seen."
jesus christ. i am so sorry. thank you again, for clearing this up. and i am sorry for the stress and abuse, majora has caused you.
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itstimeforstarwars · 6 months ago
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New guy got a haircut that makes him look like a very butch lesbian and I am the one who is training the new guy and tbh the Desperately Confused Looks we have gotten from customers and vendors today are the only good thing about this fucking job.
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pixie77x2001 · 20 hours ago
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Here are my answers :D
Giacomo: Giacomo isn’t only my favorite character but also my comfort character Giacomo has helped me mentally when I was having a difficult time of my life due to personal reasons (won’t explain it btw) but if I could speak to Giacomo personally like ever I would thank him for making my days a lot brighter when I was going through a lot and since 2023 back in November I started simping for him since he makes me so happy
Giacomo: (yes again lol) I liked him the first time I saw him and I know his first battle with him is quick but I always enjoyed seeing him and pretty much the same reason why I favorite him as my favorite team star member
Teal Mask DLC: i honestly enjoyed the area and the music too I find it very relaxing yet fun to play and do on there and also got to meet Kieran for the first time and yes my all time favorite character from the DLC
Drayton: I would say Drayton not only he immediately became my all time favorite elite four member but also straight up hilarious and I love his lay back vibe and honestly I don’t see him as a “Jerk” to me he’s just a chill guy after all
Here’s my opinion on the area zero crew: (note: don’t hate on me for my humble opinion) (Penny: I really love her character a lot and I honestly see my younger self in her and yet she reminds me so much of myself probably the most relatable character I relate to my favorite poke girl by far) (Nemona: I do like her character too I especially love her love for Pokémon battles and especially her bubbly personality not my most favorite character but I like her better then other characters) (Arven: I’m not crazy about Arven I do like him quite funny and all but one thing that makes me angry that he literally spams the “rock polish” a while I’m doing all the heavy work like it always makes me so angry I know defensive is good but it can’t completely save you but other then that I do like him not enough to be a love or be a favorite though)
Here’s my opinion on the sibling relationship between Kieran & Carmine: honestly I prefer Kieran over Carmine because not only she treats him horribly and was horrible to him in general but make us lie to Kieran! I won’t ever forgive Carmine for that and no one can make me like her like at all
Here’s my opinion on the BB league members: I find them a fun yet relatable friend group and I love each and every one of them sm
Slither Wing: my god what a cutie I love how fluffy it is and it’s probably my all time favorite and I may use it sometime whenever I replay the game :O
Revavroom: I would say Revavroom not only it’s a cool Pokémon and it’s both my favorite steel and poison type it honestly has the best shiny form I ever seen like a GOLDEN CAR like come on! You can’t tell me that isn’t one of the most prettiest shinys ever and true story I also lost a shiny Revavroom that disappeared before I could get to it I was is upset and still am :’/
Starfall Street: I love the story behind team star and the quest itself not only because I get to see my two favorites Giacomo and Atticus But the story of team star had my attention the most in the game i love coming up with theories about them as for team star’s bullies…whoever they were I’m not forgiving them especially when they hurt my boi Giacomo (may do a post of my theories on team star’s bullies in the future) was such a emotional yet heart warming story and overall probably the most relatable back story because I was bullied as well back in school so if I knew Team star’s sooner I could give them a call lol
Here are my thoughts: I do hope to see a sequel because not only I wanna see who team star bullies were since there off screen characters at the moment but to see flashbacks that we didn’t get to see like see team star’s bullies from there view and figure out where they been all that time after leaving the academy and also see what team star from is up too but like I said I will make a future post on my theory on them soon so stay tuned for that)
Please don’t hate on my opinion on the things I listed
Pokemon Scarvio themed reblog/tag game!
-- ❤️: Favorite character?
-- ⭐️: Favorite Team Star member?
-- 0️⃣: Favorite DLC character?
-- 💥: Favorite Gym leader/Elite four?
-- 📝: Opinion on each of the Zero Crew? (Arven, Penny, Nemona)
-- 🌲: Opinion on the Kitakami siblings?
-- 🫐: Opinion on the BB league members?
-- ⏱️: Favorite Paradox Pokemon?
-- 💛: Favorite Paldean Pokemon?
-- 📖: Favorite storyline? (Ex: Mochi mayhem, Starfall street)
-- 🗣️: Anything you want to say about Scarvio? (Infodump, a rant, or just other thoughts)
Feel free to infodump alongside your answers! Anyone is allowed to reblog :3
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itspileofgoodthings · 2 months ago
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had a very nice realization about peace, especially spiritual peace, the other day. (Been brewing for a while.) and it’s just: peace is for the non-peaceful.
#very obvious of course#but it’s just—-#it’s hard to explain how messy I feel all the time#in all areas of my life#what a grubby little gremlin I feel I am#with my unfinished projects and my half-done things and my unsorted through internal life#and my room that needs vacuuming and my bathroom that needs dusting and the text messages that need answering#and the relationships that I feel need attention or fixing or solving#and tbh counseling has been helpful simply because my counselor is just like ‘girl if you don’t chill’#(kind)#like. she’d just like you’re doing FINE#everyone doesn’t have the dishes finished or everything in order at all times#so I’ve been able to kind of see the ridiculously high expectations for myself I just walk around with#and/or just the pressure I feel to have everything DONE#but even all of that aside it has just been dawning on me that—I can have peace in those contexts#not only once everything is ‘sorted’#because it’s not that I don’t think I deserve it or whatever! that’s not exactly the issue#it’s just literally my brain is like ‘peace is for people who have their shit together’#‘and that isn’t you’#and it just !!!!! isn’t true!!!!!!!!#even if I were as grubby as I think I am (and sometimes I think I AM)#it doesn’t matter. you can still know peace. God still loves me#in the middle of the mess#my WORST states have been when I felt like I had to get myself spiritually in order before God could come#sort of dusted and vacuumed metaphorically speaking I mean#and of course there is work to do#but that happens only with God and because of God and IN God#so I don’t have to wait#can’t explain how often I have heard people talk about peace and been like#‘not for me though’ but it actually IS lol. it I s. beCAUSE I am grubby!!!!!!!!
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iliveinprocrasti-nationn · 21 days ago
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Nazis are a threat to everyone. We know this, we understand this. HOWEVER. Goyim, non-Jewish people, I'm asking you to think before you speak on Elon's actions.
Yes, the people trying to insist it was just a "Roman salute" and meant nothing are infuriating, but I have seen responses to it that do nothing more than encourage neo-Nazis and their sympathizers. I've seen "comebacks" where people say "Go do a "Roman salute" in a crowd", "go do it in front of a Jewish person". I just saw a video of someone saying, "Better yet, find yourself a synagogue, and go do the "Roman salute", and see how that goes... bet you won't."
You are putting Jewish people in danger. You, leftist who thinks you're being so smart and witty with your comeback, are encouraging neo-nazis to threaten Jewish people. "Better yet"? Go find a synagogue? Go find a synagogue, go there to do the Nazi salute, and that's the better option you're suggesting to them? What you're doing is telling a Nazi that they need to actively harm Jewish people to prove their beliefs to you, and I can tell you that encouragement is embraced by them.
Jewish people are already going to be one of the main targets of any Nazi or white supremacist group, but half of you are actively offering us up for your "gotcha" moment. Y'all don't think before you speak, and you need to examine why you would ever think to give specific ideas on how to harm Jewish people to neo-Nazis who have just been emboldened to a level we haven't seen in decades.
#nazis#antisemitism#i'm TIRED#y'all know there are nazis in your area right. is it just jewish people who know this? is that it?#do y'all think nazis just hide away in some alcove to jump out and commit hate crimes and then disappear again#there are nazis in your community. i am saying this to your face because it's true.#you know how i know? because there are nazis in my community.#we plastered his face everywhere. his wife took down her 'pregnancy crisis center' webpage that had more dogwhistles than an animal shelter#and he's still fuckin here. he brought more nazis into my community for a festival. they lit a swastika to celebrate at the end#his wife makes handmade hitler christmas ornaments. to gift to her friends#and half of you are so fuckin removed from threats in your community that your first thought when they go mask off and arm band on#is to encourage them! to give them suggestions for their next hate crime!#because half of y'all think about jewish people in the same base way they do#as some mysterious 'other' who isn't a part of your group but isn't a part of theirs and who won't affect you if we get hurt#so we're the ones you offer up.#notice how no one is saying 'go do that in front of a pride center'#no! because you know what nazis think and who they hate but we (jewish people) are the only acceptable targets to you#i've been out since 12 but not once have i seen other leftists offer us (queer people) up the same way they offer us (jewish people) up#and that's why we don't trust y'all. that's why y'all tend to know so few of us#because you're not safe at best and actively antisemitic at worst. and we leave when y'all reveal that#i have met very few allies in my life who've fully respect myself and my culture and my language and my religion and my ethnicity#there are allies who respect some parts but it's so incredibly rare to meet someone who respects all of it#but y'all can't bring yourself to do it and half of you are antisemitic anyway#the only time y'all ever examine yourselves or even talk about antisemitism without claiming jewish people make it up is when they kill us#or. i guess in this case it'll be when y'all get us killed
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hana-bobo-finch · 2 days ago
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spent the evening drawing a little something to commemorate my first time playing hollow knight
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just entered greenpath and I LOVE the ambiance of it, i really couldn’t do it justice here
#art#hollow knight#I really can’t draw waterfalls alaaaas oh well#they just look like Big Blobs I’m gonna. explode if I keep thinking about it I’m too tired to fix em#for those absolutely DYING to know my thoughts on it so far—#it is SO fun but in all honesty I do not know what I’m doing at any given time#I think I’m slightly getting the hang of it?? but I definitely did more wandering around than actual plot progression#speaking of which I’m completely lost on the plot and lore. it’ll be explained more later on I’m positive but for now? no idea#don’t know who these people are or why they’re here or what’s going on but#yknow. I like it so far!#I am also very bad at it so far!! I’ve lost an embarrassing amount of times because I got knocked into spike pits#I think that rest areas being benches is so whimsical. nothing special just. a bench. love that#I was gonna draw the bench but then I remembered I can’t draw seats of any kind so. standing up it is#the only thing I can really say as a negative right now is there aren’t many fleshed out characters so far#oh I’m 100% sure that’s going to change so it’s not a complaint#but as someone who mostly gravitates towards the characters in games? right now it feels very lonely. sad#I like the map guy. cornifer I think his name is#I can’t get his name right for the life of me. so far I’ve called him corn cornfield and confield#also his wife. she seems so depressed I think she needs someone to talk to#or a bigger doorframe#and that little miner thing? what’s her name? I want to say it starts with M#she was adorable. the children yearn for the mines#but yeah overall I crave more characters…..I’ll have to actually play through the game more for that won’t I#only other issue is that. fun fact. did you know dyscalculia can affect one’s sense of direction and reading maps#in other words I spent most of my time playing the game being confused and lost because where the hell am I#but that’s a me problem lmao#overall. good game so far mhm 👍 I can’t say I know what any of it is actually about but yeah I like it#goes without saying but. please don’t spoil anything for me!!!auhghhh
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yellllowstar · 2 months ago
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slowly I'm recovering the beauty of discovery
(creature by half•alive)
(textless + timelapse below cut)
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#yellowart#subnautica#i feel like the timelapse is kinda long but also this did take a long time to make#anyways. let me yap about the meanings of all the panels <3#'i am creation' -> the ocean being the source of life and where shit evolved from also a good way to sort of 'set the scene' for subnautica#'both haunted' -> GHOST leviathan; in the BONE fields#'and holy' -> this one was a bit trickier. debated about using the emperor but i knew i wanted to use her elsewhere#also debated hoverfish because its cute and well liked so i thought that would be funny for 'and holy'#also something something jesus walking on water also makes it fitting. in the end though i decided on a peeper with the enzyme trail#and i *tried* to make it loop over its head like a halo but idk how well that imagery came through. still mentioned it in the alt text tho.#'made in glory' -> was REALLY torn about this one. on the one hand i wanted to have like a picture of the code because something something#divine machine and it being made out of code making it inherently holy or something; but i wasnt sure if that would be too#'immersion breaking' since most of the stuff in this is like in game stuff i wasnt sure if acknowledging that it was a game would be#too much. my other idea was to draw a couple of creature eggs like a stalker egg and a spadefish egg or something; but in the end i just#went with the one that i personally thought was cooler so if you think it does feel out of place uhhhh sorry i guess lmao.#also yes that is code from the game. idk shit about programming i just think code shit is cool so i poked though a modding tutorial til i#found what it is they use to look at that shit and started poking around. its pretty cool tbh. anyways the specific part i chose for the#drawing was something under the peepers; i think its the bit that tells the enzyme peepers to do the enzyme stuff like the trail obviously#but also some other stuff. not 100% sure though like i said idk shit about this sort of thing but everything in there seems pretty well#labeled its kinda impressive. and very helpful for navigating even if you dont know shit lol.#anyways. 'even the depths of the night cannot blind me' -> blood kelp trench is i think one of the darkest biomes in the game#possibly THE darkest so i thought it would be fitting. probably my least favorite panel though i dont think i did a very good job#representing the area or representing the bloodvines :/#'when you guide me' -> sea emperor but more specifically her messages to the player telling you to 'come here'#'creature only' -> not sure how well i can articulate this but basically the idea of humans beig animals with animal needs to eat and drink#and the idea of being a part of the ecosystem. modern life tends to make us forget that sort of thing but id imagine for ryley being on the#planet would violently remind him of this with things trying to eat him while he has to try to eat things as well. being part of the food#web. 'creature only' because he is only a creature not non-essential systems maintenance chief; but a creature living in an environment and#trying to survive. or something like that. does that make any fucking sense to anyone besides me? whatever.#anyways yapping over 👍
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icewindandboringhorror · 25 days ago
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currently at That Point which occurs once every few months where one briefly begins pacing around the house teary eyed contemplating selling their own organs or becoming an online scammer or getting on anxiety meds so you can bear the risk taking required to be a hitman or so on and so forth.... why must everything so Expensive... Surely all would be healed in life if only I had one big plate of lasagna and a simple loan of $40,000 ... auoughhh....
#And then you just eventually shrug and go 'welp. nothing i can do i guess' and sad cartoon music plays as you shuffle back to your room#It's just hard with my specific physical and mental issues since it's like.. I couldn't really handle most jobs. I can't handle school. I'm#100% aromantic and asexual so I'll never get married so I can't get money that way. I have too much issues with social cues#+ too nervous temperament + too low energy to put effort into lying and having a fake relationship just for money. so on and so forth etc.#Really I should have just been born into a middle class family. Which I guess everyone says. but ESPECIALLY considering my#chronic conditions kind of hampering my ability to function 'normally' or be Independent in a regular way. I'm always going to be#in some way sort of beholden to the whims of people around me who I must depend on. so... well of course they might as well have been rich#lol like that would have been better for me of course.#AAANyway... Just thinking about another stupid fucking climate change summer... months keep going by so fast.. soon it will be so again#And it's like such SMALL things would make drastic improvements for me. Literally if I just had a place with central AC#then like 75% of my issues with summer would vanish instantly. literally. But instead it's like.. having a cheap hot apartment + only#half functional dinky window ac + my illnesses that make me heat sensitive + living in a part of the country that keeps getting hotter +#inability to leave the house much meaning I can't just go spend time in a cooler place etc. all factors which combine together to make#it just utterly miserable for MONTHS and mentally draining. And literally ALL I would need to fix that is just...#have a place with central AC that works.. (or move to a colder country/area but that also takes money. Or just not have illnesses#that make me heat sensitive. but that I can't control). etc. etc. I guess it's just the nature of the constant background frustration of#being part of The Masses under our current manifestation of unmitigated capitalism. Such minor details would make such huge#quality of life improvements and yet will remain ever out of reach. ONE little thing could change your whole life but you can't even have#that. so many 'If only' scenarios. etc. And of course obviously I am incredibly thankful just to have anywhere to live at all. food to eat#. any sort of stability whatsoever no matter how fragile it feels/is. But that still doesn't make it not frustrating occasionally to look#around and see how relatively little would have to change in order for you to be a decent percentage more comfortable and yet#how still far away even those ''small'' seeming goals are. etc. etc.#Seriously think I've been traumatized by the summer or something somehow lol like thinking about it being warm weather eventually#makes me nauseous with panic. It's just SOOO much labor. micromanaging windows and fans and blocking every ounce of light#and not being able to cook (cant even afford a single degree of temp increase due to the stove) for months and barely being able#to sleep for months and the claustrophobia of days on end crawling out of your skin because it doesnt even get cool enough at#night to offer relief so you're just always feeling trapped.. hgrhh...#It starts getting hot here sometimes in May but mostly June then lasts through October now.. thats like half the year almost.. ARghhH#anyway... If any extremely rich person reading this would like to buy me an air conditioned house in exchange for multiple years worth#of art (I will paint murals on all of your grand dining halls and make all the custom sculptures you could ever want etc) then.. hewwo :'3c
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dawnthefluffyduck · 6 months ago
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I drew this explanation post for why I was completely inactive for a week, but then felt too anxious and drained to post it, and subsequently disappeared for a second week
Two main blog drawings and one side blog wip later, I remembered I made this and still think it's funny, so even though I stopped being dead (TM) I still wanted to share lol
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Brief series of events at work
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^^^old, but I'm still taking it easy so posts on both this blog and my alt will continue to be scattered for now
#so for those of you that don't know; i have moderate combined scoliosis#my entire back is always at least a little strained so i have to really watch my physical activity#but i live in Tennessee where we have the lowest federally allowed minimum wage#so in order to pay for college i have to work in a package distribution company because it's the only place that pays well/has a scholarshi#I'm in the small package dept thankfully (bc spine)#but for the last three months one specific manager kept sending me out to a different area with the heaviest packages in the building#when i first disappeared it was because i was having trouble walking and using stairs lmao#I complained to that manager and it seems I'll be in smalls again for the foreseeable future; so I've had time to recover and am better :D#every day i didn't post after that was due to anxiety and a low social battery BUT I'm getting slightly better on that front too#i have been *very* aware of my spine lately though#the last time I got an xray was ten years ago and i wonder if it's changed since then... not that i can afford a new xray lol#also can i just take a space to complain about the US not using the metric system#so many packages have kilograms ONLY and i have NO frame of reference for that since we don't use kilograms anywhere else#''ooh wow 70 is a big number but surely it can't be that baD- HOLY SHIT THAT'S 154 POUNDS'' <- me all the time#at this point I myself will just switch to metric and make life harder for both myself and life around me out of principle
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asfdhgsdkjhgb · 4 months ago
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had quite the night drive earlier this evening.
#just me rambling again#web weaving#(?)#uh. one of my friends who is out of town for college was visiting and i got to see him and our friends and the only core member of that#group of people missing was my ex girlfriend who you may also know of as my wonderful wife#who has I assume been very busy with their own life things but has also barely and very sparsely had any hint of communication with any of#us within the past few months which I've been realizing very recently sort of hurts my feelings because we used to be so close and#they had been saying that they would be constantly making sure we still were in each other's lives. but then very quickly have#seemingly dropped off the face of the earth#anyways. I was driving aforementioned friend who is in town back home (family home not college obv) and when i was finally going back#towards my house afterwards my Google maps finally lead me to an area that i was more familiar with driving and i got to an#intersection and it was telling me to take a right to go home but i knew that i knew the way perfectly from that intersection to my#ex girlfriend / best friend / wifes familys house from all of the times I've gone that direction through the past years and so#i turned off my directions and i took a left towards their house#not super sure why but my brain and body just knew it was something i needed to do and so i went and drove down their street and cried#a lot the whole time and then drove myself home from their house once again following a super familiar path#and idk im still feeling very emotional about it. the fact that halloween by noah kahan was the first song to play on Spotify#after i made that left turn im sure didnt help (knowing that i miss them so much and am going to be leaving this area myself#soon enough here and there's been an open offer for a while now that they are welcome to follow and live with me once they get their degree#(and also um. halloween is next week lol)#idk i just havent felt the full force of how badly i miss having them in my life until tonight. when i was around this person i could feel#our souls singing in harmony. i genuinely cannot describe the feelings of our relationship in words i feel like only vaguely abstract art#could communicate the connection that was forged between us and the level of understanding and knowing#something not dissimilar to looking into the sun directly or trying to describe a vivid color to someone who is completely blind#something about the way the entire universe breathes in unison and everything around us are all pieces of the same stars#sigh#i miss my wife tails i miss her a lot /ref
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britneyshakespeare · 1 year ago
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My toxic trait is that I like how my incomplete drawings look better than the finished things
#im sorry i cant be her (my searching lines)#i cant stop thinking about this drawing i have a sinking feeling that im gonna be very unhappy when its done#or. not unhappy. but not as excited as i feel about it now!#i only worked in two short chunks on it but both were pretty productive#i have a feeling that when i take the time to really dedicate myself to it im gonna fuck something up#like i can see areas i need to/can improve already but the glaring flaws are ok! bc it's not finished!#it OVERALL looks cool and LOOKS like it has the potential to turn out well#but will it... WILL IT??? WILL IT EVER?#i have never been so totally completely satisfied w any finished drawing ive dedicated myself to fully.#tales from diana#this is also only the second time ive done a really deliberate self-portrait that wasnt in some for or another. practice#like of course ive drawn my face before. not that often actually. but since yes i do draw. i have drawn myself#i probably should've drawn myself more times for how often i think id like a nice picture of myself#but then again its not gonna be so 'nice' if i make it and am not totally happy w it?#see one of the ppl who inspired me to learn to draw is ned @sneez my dearest. he's spoiled me before#and drawn me very beautifully on several occasions and it's very much a thing to move one's heart#to see someone dedicate their talent to depicting YOU.#and i might say HE has made me look more beautiful in art than i think i'll ever look in the flesh#which is not to say he drew me inaccurately. but he's so talented that his art is more beautiful than life.#and i dont compare myself in skill to him bc he's been doing it for YEARS and way more trained than me in the visual arts.#like it simply wouldn't be fair so i only compare myself to myself. naturally#but i used to think. very VAINLY i might say. that if i could draw like him id draw beautiful pictures of myself all the time#well ce n'est pas ca mon ami. since learning to draw i've found im much more interested in drawing ppl i find beautiful#rather than myself. im not art. not through my own eyes at least.#i should really draw ned sometime. i really should.#actually somewhat embarrasingly i tried to draw him like 5 or 6 years ago. and i NEVER tried to draw then#i did show him tho and he thought it was very impressive but that's probably just bc he loves me. xoxox#maybe ill post that someday as a throwback just for the hell of it. lol. thatd be cute
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monachopism · 8 months ago
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am i autistic or am i just paranoid. level: impossible
#seeing a friend of mine for the first time in 2 years but it was at a 9hr work training and i barely talked to him the whole time#so i text our gc multiple times bc im excited#but everyones drained from the day#so am i being a good loving kind person or am i being annoying as hell#my brain says the first one and my gut says the second#i also might have a big fat crush on this man (he is unfairly attractive and kind and funny and TALL)#so i may be overreacting bc of that#i just missed him and now my big fat crush on him is bigger and fatter than ever#at the end of our first summer he hugged me tight and told me he loved me (platonically)#then he asked if i was coming back and i said yes without any hesitation#and then he didnt come back#so ive been going on 2 years of stewing in this fucking crush soup and now im just#tumblr is the only place where i can talk abt this no one important in my life can know this#no one#i just really like him#and i wanna be around him all the time#and i wanna sit with him and talk to him and laugh with him#and help him with stuff#and i have not had an actual crush on someone since my sophomore and junior year of high school#which was 4 and 5 years ago at this point#this guy also kept staring at me from across the room and everytime i would glace in his direction he would look away#and every time i would get a glimpse of him at training i could physically feel the butterflies#hell#every time i even thought about the fact that we were in the same general area i would get butterflies#this never happens to me and its such a weird feeling#would you be so kind by dodie is the anthem of the hour rn#and i know there's a huge part of me that thinks i am unlovable bc of how i look#and ive never had anyone love me or even like me enough to initiate any kind of anything#ive been on one date in my life#never been kissed never had sex
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gumm1defloor · 9 months ago
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Am *this close* to venturing into the ValVel tags on AO3 just so I can consume content of them interacting. I swear they better have at least one scene together in S2 or so help me God I will actively start to ship them on main instead of VoxVal.
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flowerygn · 25 days ago
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ehm so i sat in a strangers car haha
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