#i am currently trying to stop treating this as a sign that they want to avoid me

[number-1-crush]

having anxiety and a crush at the same time is so much to deal with

[starogeorgina]

𝐔𝐧𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧

Paring: Aemond Targaryen × Targaryen reader, minor Daemon Targaryen × Targaryen reader

Warnings: Swearing, kidnapping, self harm

1.03

“Shh, shh,” you try to gently rock Daenys to sleep. “Please, calm down, sweet girl.”

Your daughter was brought to you in the early hours since she woke up fussy and wouldn’t latch onto the wet nurse. Luckily, she fed from your breast without issue, but your silver-haired baby was still unhappy and crying. From the flush in Daeny's cheeks and the redness in her gums, you suspect she has started teething.

“Princess,” one of the handmaids approaches you while nervously pulling on the sleeve of her dress. You often wonder how the servants who followed Rhaenyra to Dragonstone felt watching the way their beloved princess was treated. “The maester wishes to speak with you as a matter of urgency. There is a wet nurse in the room down the hall; would you like me to take Daenys to her while you dress?”

Reluctantly, you nod and hand your daughter over to the younger woman. As soon as you’re left alone, you bring the faded nightgown over your head and redress yourself, choosing to put on the light grey gown you were wearing the night you were taken. It was made to accommodate the swell of your stomach, and now the extra fabric hung loose down the front. You had others to choose from, but it was one of the only items you had that was truly yours.

In every passing moon, the maester would examine you for any sign of pregnancy, which was humiliating, so you’d at least attempt to try and maintain a shred of dignity. You comb your hair with your fingers and try to straighten out the creases on your dress. Just as you finish adjusting yourself, the door to the room opens, and the maester, followed by a handmaiden, enters.

—

You were cursed by the ghosts of your father's blindness and your mother's lies. Your mother claimed that before King Viserys died, he declared he wanted Aegon on the throne, and all the men who deemed a woman unfit to rule believed her. Your father turned a blind eye to your family's scheming for years, and now the future of the realm would be full of war, murder, and misery.

As you dig your nails into the palm of your hand to stop yourself from screaming, blaming your parents for this situation was an easy option. If the throne wasn’t usurped, then envoys would never have been sent; Lucerys would still be alive, as would Jaehaerys, and you and your daughter would be safe in Aemond’s arms.

And if your father had been stronger-willed, none of it would have happened.

Being so caught up in your own thoughts, you don’t notice Prince Daemon entering the room. It’s not until you feel his presence beside you that you finally address him, “What is it?”

“A raven arrived from the red keep; one of my little spies has informed Criston Cole and your cunt of a husband that we have taken you north.”

No, no, no.

“They are currently gathering the green forces and will leave in a couple of days. Which means the false king won’t have that hoary old bitch, Vhagar, to hide behind. With only Sunfyre on his side, we can easily take the city back with the mere threat of Caraxes, Syrax, Vermax, Moondancer, and Tyraxes.”

“Need I remind you, uncle, which side my dragon is on?”

Gripping your jaw tightly, Daemon shoved you against the wall. “Need I remind you, niece, that you’re nothing more than a prisoner? I’ve spared your daughter's life, something the fucking kinslayer didn’t do for Luccerys.”

You slap his hand away and say, “You’ve got what you wanted; you're getting another child. Do not fucking touch me again.”

Daemon places both hands firmly on the wall beside your head, caging you in. His eyes flickered over you; he didn’t quite believe what you just said. “The maester confirmed this?”

“I haven’t bled in two moons; the maester is convinced my stomach will swell again soon.” Sarcastically, you add, “Congratulations; I hope you're as excited as I am.”

—

After speaking with the maester himself, Daemon kept his original promise and had you move to a larger, more comfortable bedchamber with crimson colors and dragon decor, and soon a crib would be brought in and your daughter would join you. All you cared about was keeping Daenys close.

You feel the lavish oils soothing the ache in your shoulders when one of the handmaidens rubs them onto your skin. This was the first time in many moons you had bathed properly, and the luxury of having a clean body, hair, and clothing wasn’t something you’d take for granted again.

“My Prince,” the handmaiden nods her head at him, then attempts to cover you up with a towel, causing your uncle to chuckle.

“It’s considered bad manners to interrupt a lady while she’s bathing.”

“It’s nothing new," he says as he stands at the bottom of the tub, showing no attempt to advertise his gaze from your bare breasts. “Perhaps I wanted to join you in bathing.”

“I’d rather you drowned me.“

Daemon smirks, “Leave us.”

The handmaiden gives you an apologetic look, then leaves. No matter how many times Daemon spilled his seed inside you, the reality of carrying his child never felt real until now. You’d already suffered on the birthing bed out of duty; now you’d be doing it again to keep Daenys safe. You don’t even realize you’re crying until you taste the salty tears on your lips. “What happens if this pregnancy doesn’t end well?”

“What do you mean?”

“I had two other daughters once; both of them died.”

Daemon comes to the side of the tub and crouches down so he’s eye level with you. “I wasn’t aware.”

Red blotches appear on your chest and neck as you struggle to stop your voice from cracking. ���The first girl's name was Anya; she came early after three days of labor.”

Your mother had remained by your side throughout your labor, and the look of horror on her face when she saw the ‘thing’ you delivered would be forever etched in your mind. Anya’s skin was covered in small scars that looked similar to dragon scales. But no matter how monstrous she may have appeared to others, you thought she was beautiful. Against the maesters advice, Aemond visited you before the silent sisters had come to take the baby, and it was the first time since the night he lost his eyes that you’d seen him cry.

“I gave birth to Rhaella the following year; she was born at the end of the fall but was taken by the winter fever.“

The expression on Daemon’s face was hard to read; he himself knew of the pain you and Aemond have suffered from losing a baby. And you could only begin to imagine the grief and suffering the blacks felt after Lucery's death. “And news of this never reached Dragonstone?”

Your eyes sting from crying. “Our family has always been divided; who would have told you?”

“My brother.”

“Ha,” you scoff. “You saw what my father was like in the end. He had consumed so much milk from the poppy that he became oblivious to everything around him; the only person he ever wished to speak with was Rhaenyra.”

Frowning, he skims his finger over the water.

“I feared I would never again bear a living child, but the gods blessed me with Daenys. But I shall ask again, uncle, What will happen if this pregnancy doesn’t end well?”

“You do not want to find out, niece.”

[sweaterkittensahoy]

My chronic pain disabilities (hip fuckery; migraines) do not stop me from working. It doesn't mean I should treat my disabilities with less respect than disabilities that DO make it impossible to work.

When my endo pain was at its worse, I did all the things I was supposed to do--according to HR--to protect my job. I filed ADA paperwork. I communicated when I used it. I had the doctor's note. Etc.

Two days before my hysterectomy, I got a call from HR. "Oh, we're not sure we'll have work for you after you recover."

Which, first of all, is fucking illegal to say to someone who has ADA paperwork in place with you.

And, second of all, you're a fucking liar. I was the ONLY tech writer in a company of 500 people. Don't bullshit me.

I should have filed a complaint and sued the fuck out of them, but all I wanted to do was be able to possibly get out of pain and not have to worry about my paycheck after that. So, I called someone else in the company who I knew would lose his shit if I told him I'd basically just been told I had no work to do.

Two days after surgery, I had an email from HR to my personal account. Which, technically, they ALSO should not have used to contact me while on medical leave that was--like my disability paperwork--100% lined up and signed off on.

But the HR person wanted me to know that "Oh, looks like there IS work for you! Lol! Didn't know!"

This is bullshit. She was very aware.

Years later, I'm at a much better company. My supervisor, who is nothing but supportive, recently floated that it might be good to have ADA paperwork in place for my migraines because they flare during stress, which is the time I'm needed at work THE MOST.

No shit: I went into hard shutdown for about two minutes after he said it. It wasn't a threat or a dismissal of my migraines. It was him going, "Oh, hey, so no one can ever try to use them against you to say you're bad with stress, you might do this."

But all I felt was how I was absolutely fucked over by a bad company because they said, "You need to follow these legal steps," and I did, and they still tried to get around them.

So, no, I'm not dealing with getting punished if I have more than 2k in my bank account. I'm not dealing with people touching me, or my assistive devices (I don't currently use any). I can park anywhere in a lot and walk to the store entrance. But I was disabled, and I AM disabled, and I have had people try to punish me for existing in a body that just fucking HURTS because it HURTS.

It's Disability Awareness Month. I am disabled. Less so than I was ten years ago, which is a fucking stroke of luck. But also my right hip has started to go now, and who knows what the next 10 years will bring.

It's Disability Awareness Month. If someone says, "I'm disabled, and I want to talk about my experience," please pay attention and listen and learn and understand there's all sorts of ways disabled people are fighting to be treated with basic human dignity and under the basic rule of law.

[ivycjl]

Epiphany

Summary: Benny's just about given up on your relationship. What will he do when you pull away, too?

Hi! Here's my second attempt at writing. I'm planning on this having a few parts if you guys want to see more. The conflict will be resolved at the end of part four, so no worries there. Hope you like it!

Content: Arguing, silent treatment, angst

“God damnit Benny, is it too much to ask for you to be at home? With your wife? For more than one night of the fuckin’ week?”

You had had just about enough of your husband. He worked all day, rode all night, and only came back home when he needed a place to crash. You two live together and haven't seen each other in a week, for God’s sake. Not to mention the way he was treating you like a roommate more than a wife. So, currently, you're retrieving the laundry while you fight with him.

“I have to be there.”

Have to. I just have to do this and have to do that. I have to do everything except treat you like I care about you.

You stomp up the stairs and into your room. Benny had taken to passing out on the couch after his long nights, so you weren't exactly sharing anymore.

“Not every night. Not when you work all day and never come home. I'm tired of begging you, Benny. Sometimes I even wonder if you want to do this anymore.”

He freezes. "Do what?"

You roll your eyes as you fold a sweater. “You know. This. Us. Your marriage. ‘Cause a hell of a lot of the time it seems like you don't.”

He scoffs. “I seem like I don't?”

“Well, you know, you're right. It would be a little hard to tell when we never fucking talk to each other.”

Benny’s jaw clenches, and you stop folding the laundry, turning around to face him. “Do you want this, Benny?”

“’Course.”

“That's all you have to say when I ask you if you still love me? If you want to be in this relationship anymore?”

You could see him getting angry now. “God damnit, I answered you, what more do you want?”

Tears prick your eyes. “I want you to tell me how you feel. I'm not asking you if you like the color red or not, I'm asking you if you love me.”

He sighed. “I'm still here, ain't I?”

You look him in the eyes, silently pleading that he say the words he knows you want to hear. Instead, he turns away from you and puts his colors on. “I gotta go.”

Your heart sinks. Tears are freely falling on your face, and you nod. “So that's it, huh?”

Benny brushes past you like you're not there, but stops when he hears your words. “I am just about done with you, Benny Cross.”

He takes a deep breath, then walks away. You don't allow yourself to break down until the front door slams.

Later that night, after you’d collected yourself, you lay in bed alone, hating everything. Him. Yourself. The motorcycle club. The way he talked to you. If that's how it's going to be, I don't want to talk to him anymore, you think. Maybe I’ll just ice him out for a while and see what happens. The idea has some potential, you think before drifting off into sleep.

When you wake up in the morning, there's no sign your husband ever returned from the night before. Good. You start making some coffee, trying to be happy that you're alone. It's better this way. There's no one to argue with.

You take a deep breath, soaking in the smell of the coffee, the morning sun, the birds. Being along can be good. Nice. You sit down at the little breakfast table, unable to remember the last time you really used it. There's a Vogue from a few months ago under some bills, so you take it out and start flipping through it.

The rumble of a motorcycle breaks your thoughts and dread fills your body. Shit. Just stick to the plan. You aimlessly restart the magazine, hearing the door open a few moments later. Clearly, Benny thinks you're still asleep, because you don't hear him stomping around and throwing his shit everywhere. At least he has some sort of common decency, you think.

Then, out of the corner of your eye, you see him standing at the doorway of the kitchen. You don't acknowledge him until he clears his throat, and even then you drag out the time with a long sigh before raising your head.

He's in the same outfit from last night. Your immediate instinct is to jump on him, ask him where he's been, why he was out all night. But you have to give him a taste of his own medicine. Stick to the plan.

A short, awkward silence envelops the room before Benny clears his throat and says, “Morning.”

You look him up and down, trying to seem like you don't care before echoing his oh so sweet sentiments. You turn back to the magazine.

He just stands there for a second before walking over to the coffee pot and pouring a mug for himself. He sits down across the table from you, opens his mouth, then closes it. Your eyes stay firmly on Vogue.

Finally, “You don't want to know where I’ve been?”

“You're here aren't you?” You repeat him from last night. He pulls a face, shifting in his chair. “Really? You don't got nothin’ to say?”

You shrug, “Not much to say, is there?” Another one of his endearing phrases. You were pissing him off, which actually made you feel a little better. “Well fine,” he petulantly replies before leaving the room to change.

About five minutes later, you hear the front door slam again. Guess he's off to work, you think. You try to stop your heart from sinking. If he isn't going to treat you right, he won't get treated right either. That's final.

You return to your reading.

[laguezze]

PAC: A letter you're meant to receive

I'm baaaaack~ (kinda) (pretty casually, life's been tough)

As always here are the rules:

Minors DNI

Don't take everything to heart, this is a general reading! Take what resonates!

It's honest, I don't sugarcoat. If you're not liking what you read, keep scrolling! It may not be for you or you may not be ready for that message yet!

Let's take a look at the piles!!!

Pile 1

Pile 2

Pile 3

Let's go!

Pile 1

Signs this may be for you: unicorn, South Korea , the letter S, Squirrels, Love, Skydiving, birthday, anniversary, 12, 6, 16, 2006, 2001, 2026, 1970s, Billie Eilish, John Lennon, glasses.

Dear ____,

How could you think I'm not proud of you? How could you think that minor thing you did would erase all the love I feel for you? It doesn't. I don't think anything can at this point. You're human, you're allowed to make mistakes. And while I do still think you need help, you're still doing your best, even though you don't feel like it. You're trying and I see that. You're wonderful and magical and although your light is dimmed at the moment, I know there's a bright sun under that blanket of darkness you're currently holding over your head. Everything will be ok. Have you ever not gotten a resolution to your conflict? Trust me. You're going to be fine. Let yourself be, enjoy the people around you, breathe. Treat your life like you treat your dreams. Be as excited as you can. You're alive! And while you are not responsible for this darkness that has been placed upon you, you are the only one that can take it off. I understand it's difficult, but you can do it. You're tired of fighting, but you're not just anyone. You're a legend. Legends don't have it easy. Go get them.

Pile 2

Signs this may be for you: Harry Styles, Fashion school, blood drives, nurse, 😜, smoke, laughter, blonde, blue eyes, "that boy is mine", 0%, Rihanna, water, rain, Hawaii, Jumping, Rave, Cindy, the letter C, N, and A. Numbers 5, 8, and 30, AMANDA.

Hello, it's been a while.

How are you?

This is awkward, you probably didn't expect to hear from me. I have been okay, I honestly can't stop thinking about us and how it ended. It pains me to think that you left with the impression that I didn't care. I do. I did. I just want to let you know that in another life, maybe we should try again. I don't have much to say, I'm not sure why I feel so compelled to tell you this. It's so basic. I'm being channeled right now (ok aware) and it's weird because it shouldn't be this deep but I really wanted to come through and say sorry. And say that I know you miss me and I do too. And one day we will reunite and we might be able to show our love then. Sorry it ended that way. Sorry that was the last you knew of me. I think of you each day, I dream of you each night.

Pile 3

Signs this may be for you: YES GIRL, happy, cheerful, spaghetti, squash, "I'm allergic", ibuprofen, love is in the air, matchmaker, fruits, VSCO, musically, Harmony, dating apps, Jenna, Lisa, "I stan", Twitter account, laughs, pigs, 25, 23, 2022, 2001, 2000, Beyonce.

Wow, am I impressed with you,

Not only are you grown and beautiful, you're also such a good person. I'm immensely proud of you. You're doing exactly what you need to, you're living life to the fullest and I am here for it. Remember our trips to the beach? I miss you. You should call more often. I love that you're meeting new people and having fun but sometimes I need to see you and hear from you. Please call me from time to time. I know I may seem clingy, but I just miss your presence. I also don't know when I'll actually see you next, you've become so unexpected and exciting. I love you, that's why I need to hear from you. Tell me everything, I'll listen. I'm here for you and I want what's best. Come back from time to time. Please. That's the only thing I ask of you at this time. I can't say this to you normally, you'd get uncomfortable. But please listen and take this opportunity. Let's talk more often! I wanna be part of your life again! 🥰

Hope it resonates! 💕

[cstlez]

FRUSTRATION

warnings! : fluff, slight angst, implied smut, explicit language, kissing, use of y/n

;

God, he's a wretched mess.

I watched as he slammed the boy's bags, absolutely demolishing everything backstage. For a moment I wanted to laugh, as he looked at me like I had flipped over all the chairs and tables.

I continued to flip through my magazine, watching as he heaved and pulled at his collar, trying to find some space to loosen up his temper, and let it go.

“Good god man. What is wrong with you today?”

He completely ignored me, I watched Bill look behind the curtains, holding his hands up in some sort of prayer, I furrowed a brow, Bill puffed up his cheeks and mouthed, “Rejected.”

I let out an exasperated sigh, But I nodded, Bill sent me a nice sweet smile before walking off to probably go talk to the rest.

Bill knew especially, how much it meant to Tom that they get accepted by some new agency, the one they were currently working for treated them like absolute garbage. So being rejected by what is now the 3rd agency made Tom boil.

“Tom.”

“Don't fucking talk to me right now.”

I scoffed, licking my lips only slightly, I drank from my cola, ignoring the burn my ego had undergone by his anger.

I watched as he paced back and forth, sweat collecting on his neck and forehead.

“I know you're frustrated, but this isn't going to get you anywhere honey.”

“I'm not your bitch y/n.”

I laughed gently, shaking my head, is this really what he's pulling right now? Yes, he has every right to be mad, angry too, but darling throwing a fit every time will only make you more anxious.

“Am I calling you my bitch Tom? No. Sit down, you're making me anxious by pacing like that.”

He took a deep breath, he smiled sarcastically and flipped me off, walking into one of the dressing rooms, I groaned in frustration but picked up my body off the couch and walked out behind the curtains to hopefully find any of the other guys.

My heart glared at me, racing at the fact that he was dealing with his frustration all alone. I wanted to help, but he made it impossible. Its hard to believe he's reckless. Sometimes he just looks like any other boy, but not like any other boy I've met, like a boy. Sometimes his jaw is so relaxed that he stops looking less intimidating, deep down I knew that whatever it was, whatever care I held, was ridiculous.

Just a stupid pubescent fantasy, a boy in a band, and a girl.

“n/n! Is he okay?”

Bill's voice echoed behind me, I signed, I turned to face him, being met with a playful poke from Georg and Gustav.

“Uh. I don't think he's okay, he stormed off.”

Georg raised a brow, He pushed his hair away from his face, yawning into his palm.

“Go talk to him maybe? Dumbass.” Georg made me smile slightly, I don't know what he meant by that but I think part of my soul understood.

“You do know he'll only ever talk to you when he's like this right? He won't even talk to Bill, So go talk to him before he starts breaking our equipment.”

Gustav's voice echoed to my left, I sighed, but I nodded. I walked backstage yet again, I knocked at the first locked door I could find.

I knocked a few times, no response, I scoffed, rubbing the nape of my neck.

“Quit ignoring me Tom, Let's talk. Talk to me, stop locking yourself up, this cacoon phase you're undergoing is stressing everyone out. Including me.”

I heard slight rummaging on the other side, But no words were spoken at all. I groaned in frustration, knocking at the door yet again.

Nothing.

I licked my lips, wrapping my arms around me to somehow shield me from the sudden breeze of cool air hitting me.

Tom opened the door just slightly, I crouched to try and peak into the crack, Tom sat there, slumped onto the ground, He played with his lip ring, his hands folded over each other.

I opened the door completely, walking in, I sighed, he didn't even look at me.

“You okay?”

“Mhm.”

I bit the inside of my cheek, kneeling to his level, I stupidly reached for his index finger in an attempt to possibly ease his anger just a little.

He looked at me through his eyelashes, latching his finger onto my braided bracelet, and for the first time today he cracked a genuine smile.

“Tom,”

“Yeah, What?”

“What happened?”

He sighed, bringing his right hand to cup the back of my left thigh, I chewed on the inside of my cheek, looking anywhere but in his direction.

“Some stupid agent, he said we didn't qualify. Like— Bill has gotten a lot better, and so have I, and Georg, and Gustav has some great ideas, and still, no one will take us.”

I listened intently, ignoring the burn in my chest. He sighed, looking behind me.

“Tom there will be a hundred more chances, cut yourself some slack okay?

He slowly nodded, cupping my waist with both his hands, he slowly pulled me towards him, wrapping himself around me, His face buried into the crook of my neck, his scent scattering all over me.

He planted a kiss on my collarbone, flushing my entire body. I dryly swallowed, ignoring the close proximity.

“I'm sorry, for being so rude, I'm just so stressed.”

I wanted to melt away in his arms, my knees hurt, and felt wobbly from kneeling on them for so long, he pulled me closer, the nearer I was, the more nervous I grew, he pulled away looking me in the eyes as he slowly pulled me onto his lap, an instant relief for my legs, but an instant chill for the rest of me.

“What are you doing?”

He didn't speak, instead, he reached a hand under my shirt, looking me directly in the eye, he leaned in, and planted a kiss on my cheek, I took a deep breath, and before I could even react he had placed his lips against mine.

He was gentle, the kiss so soft and genuine it could make me cry, he pulled away for a moment, but before I could react he kissed me again, this time it was deeper, his lips molding against mine.

Every decimal in my body reacted to him, easing into him and his arms even more, he unclasped my bra, feeling my back as he kissed me even rougher, he pulled away for a second, but he rushed back in, licking my bottom lip slightly.

“Fuck I'm sorry.”

His mumble against my lips only made me ignite even more, the desperation in his kiss and voice turned on something in me that no other guy had ever done, his left hand reached over to cup my tit, fiddling with my nipple in between his fingers.

I let out a quiet whimper, his nails digging into my hips, he kissed me with even more hunger, My hand reached to cup his, my body shaking with hunger.

He pulled away from my lips once again, his eyes looking seductively into mine, he continued to look into them, reaching to the button on my jeans, he quickly undid them, sliding two fingers into them, he felt my panties, smiling teasingly at the mess he had made me.

He fiddled with the damp cloth for a moment, watching my mouth shut tightly in despair, he made me hungrier in ways I hadn't felt before. He could somehow satisfy every part of my being by simply existing and now that he was touching me all I could do was try not to be desperate.

But how the hell was I supposed to deny that?

He finally slipped a finger into me, instantly making me squirm, I gripped his shoulder, feeling as his singular finger curled in me,

I gasped as I felt another, my hands scrunched up his shirt, he pushed his fingers in and out, pinching my clit and touching me with such knowledge and interest that it drove me crazy, my eyebrows furrowed in pleasure, I gasped and haved in satisfaction, leaning over to bite into his tender flesh to hide the orgasm that had overcome me in second.

“Feel good?”

I swallowed dryly, nodding into his shoulder, my hand reached to grip his shirt even tighter. I planted a kiss on his cheek, squirming at the feeling of his fingers teasing my insides, his quiet grin reminding me of exactly why I was attracted to him in the first place.

[just-a-ghost00]

Which ghosty is being sneaky?

In other words, which one of your past connections is trying to sneak back into your life?

Images from Pinterest. For each group, we will have two sections : who dis?? & why ?!

Group 1

Who dis?? | 5 of cups, 3 of cups, ace of cups, 10 of wands

We're talking about someone who possibly played a double game when they knew you. This person broke your heart trying to juggle different love interests. This person ended up leaving you for someone else and never took accountability for the hurt they caused. It could be possible that they tried to put on your shoulders the responsibility of what happened. They potentially blamed you for how the connection didn't work. We're talking about someone that is currently dissatisfied with their life, that feels burdened by their responsibilities and could possibly struggle with drinking issues. Someone that tends to party a lot and indulge in short term connections. We're talking about a water sign or a fire sign (Pisces, Scorpio & Sagittarius mainly).

Why?! | Judgement, ace of swords, Hierophant, 4 of wands

Karma bit their ass and now this person regrets not treating you right when they had the chance to. They see you doing well on your own, being successful and getting revenge on life and they want to be a part of it. They had an "epiphany" as they realize the value of what they lost. This person realizes that you had the potential of being the one for them and they ruined it all. They might not have been ready for commitment in the past but now they want nothing more but that. They want to sneak back into your life to build something tangible and long lasting with you, to prove their loyalty to you. They realize that you are their home and there is no one else they could feel so safe with but you.

Group 2

Who dis?? | The Emperor, 6 of swords, knight of pentacles, 4 of swords

We're talking about someone that's very stubborn and independent. Someone with a short temper and strong morals. This person is used to being alone and working alone. This is someone that is very focused on their career. Connection has stopped with this person because of a trip, a move, a change of career or studies. This is someone that is at a distance from you, with whom you have little to no contact. This person is slow to makes decisions and they tend to keep their ideas to themselves. They're not the type to communicate their feelings clearly but rather to sulk in their little corner. This could be a father figure of some sort or a person of authority. This could be someone that is older than you. Possibly an Aries or a Taurus.

Why?! | King of cups, Queen of wands, King of wands, Ace of pentacles

I am picking up on several situations that could be intertwined so bear with me. There's a possibility that you're in contact with a new person as we're speaking whom we'll call person B. Person A is the one the reading is about. Person A has heard rumor that you were interacting with person B. They are getting jealous and think that person B will take their stead if they don't act quickly. The other possibility is that this person has come to terms with their feelings (remember we said that they don't speak about how they feel easily) and they realized that they loved you more than they planned. They understand that you have a good chemistry and that you are the perfect match. They want to give your connection a chance. In both cases, this person is feeling optimistic about the future and they intend to make you an offer.

Group 3

Who dis?? | 2 of swords, 4 of pentacles, Hierophant, Temperance

In terms of signs, I'm picking up on Taurus, Gemini and Sagittarius. We're talking about someone indecisive, shy, guarded, traditional. Possibly a religious person. This could be someone you were committed to in the past. This could also be a work connection or someone you met at school. This is someone that values honesty and reciprocity in connections. Communication may have stopped because this person felt confused and/or dissatisfied with how things were going between you. It could also have been because of cultural differences, differences in opinions about relationships or religious beliefs. This is someone that may enjoy traveling alone a lot to make their mind about different things in life.

Why?! | Hermit, Wheel of fortune, Queen of wands, 10 of pentacles

This person may have decided to stop the communication for a while in order to gain clarity about the connection and what it meant to them. During their period of introspection, this person understood a lot of things about themselves and about you. They came to the conclusion that they valued the time spent with you, the happiness and well being that came with it. They understood that there was a part of destiny at play here and that if they were to stay with you, great success and abundance would come with it. This person realized that your presence in their life was beneficial to them in more ways than they could count. They feel lucky to be close to you in a way that maybe not many people have the chance to be. They know that your charisma and generosity would be of great help to them. I feel a bit of business oriented intentions coming from this person more than anything. But there's also a possibility that they consider friendship before anything else.

[goldsbitch]

I gave so many signs

summary: First unrequited love is not the one to ever leave your mind. Y/N looks back at her missed connection with Charles Leclerc from the time they were just teenagers and regrets having him slip away.

song fic (disclaimer: rights belong to the respectable owners)

exile - Taylor Swift Lie to me - 5 Seconds of Summer (feat. Julia Michaels) Worst of you - Maisie Peters

warning: Present time, the past

Coming back home to Monaco always brought a sour smile to her face. She loved growing up in this strange small town where everyone knew each other and celebrities came to show off and then went back to wherever, to tell stories of Monte Carlo.

They say that you get to experience three very different real loves in your lifetime - and only if you're lucky, it would be with the same person. Her first love was Charles Leclerc.

I saw you lookin' brand new overnight I caught you lookin' too, but you didn't look twice

Visiting family was the reason why she always came back, but going out with the few girls from high school who stayed there was a treat she dared not to miss. There is just something about hanging out with those people who helped one buy the first eyeshadow and with whom she pregamed at one of their step dad's dermatology office before going on trying to get into any club that would allow minors in. So there she was once again, at the old time spot, having a harder time to hold her alcohol since she'd passed the magic non hangover years. And to her luck, he walked in only a bare half an hour later than her.

Whenever she saw him, even after those years, it was like everyone else had dissapeared from the room. He seemed to age like wine.

It's 3 AM and the moonlight's testing me I know that you've been holding on to someone else And now I can't sleep

"Come here to me," she teased, moving closer to him. He tried to stop her and playfully pushed himself the furthest away possible the couch would allow. "Charlie, let me see!" she insisted and sat on top of him. She had to act quickly, there would be no way for her to keep the upper hand. He was just turning eighteen soon and the time in gym was starting to bring back results. "I do not have any hairline, Y/N," he gasped, annoyed. His tone changed. Back then she interpreted it as just him being done with her shit. Looking at it now, there probably was a different reason why he became more stiff. She sat on him, going through his hair and taking few photos, blissfully unaware. "I'll show this to you in a few years and we'll see! Ha!" Charles eyes were shooting arrows in her direction. She looked back at him, curious and not grasping the moment in the same way as he did. "What?" she asked simply. "Nothing..."

I can see you standing, honey With his arms around your body Laughin', but the joke's not funny at all

She laughed a bit at that memory as she sipped her drink and tried her best to avoid keeping looking back at him as he sat with his current friends and an absolute gorgeous girl laughing at his joke. She knew who she was. Sometimes she peaked at his socials and then blocked him again right away. She certainly knew he had her blocked.

They went to different schools and Charles had his racing activities anyway. So they'd spent a lot of time texting. A lot.

It was just one of the horrifically long school days where she doubted the point of her existence. Life had to be more than sitting in a pointless computer science class. She wanted to be a big lawyer girl boss one day, so why would she ever care about programming. There she was, staring at the assignment from the teacher who was stuck in 20th century anyway, having little to no clue what to do. As she'd usually do, she texted Charles. Bombed him with twenty texts demanding attention, before he finally responded. "OMG i thought someone had died" "i am dying charles" "no your not" "*you're" "i can go back to my race simulator if you keep being a little shit" "nooo, please dont go. you're my only hope. sorry, your. i get it, you got out of the school too early." "that's it, i'm gone" "noo, please stay, I'll be nice and say nice things about you" "i'm staying, go on" "you are absolutely gorgeous" "yes, agree. more" "you are soo funny, amazing, future heart breaker and your passion for racing is so inspiring" "i like this. more"

Second, third, and hundredth chances Balancin' on breaking branches Those eyes add insult to injury

They were inseparable, yet nobody knew. Always meeting alone, because they did not need anyone and their social circles didn't really meet together. Whenever he was back in town, the two of them would hit up their favorite café or hang out at his house and then go for a walk. The two of them walked around Monte Carlo as if they were suppose to be the cartographers creating the first map of that area ever. Those were the good old days that came to end very unexpectedly.

We always walked a very thin line You didn't even hear me out (Didn't even hear me out) You never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs)

His hands were shaking when he sent the email. But he just could not take it anymore. He was over the moon in love with her and didn't know how to contain it.

"there is no easy way to say this. i love you. sorry. i'm stupid and i know we're just friends. but i basically live only for racing and seeing you. i'm terrified of seeing you with someone else. if there is at least a cell in your body that feels the same, please let's meet up and talk about it. if not, do not reply and i will never mention this again and deal with it. i love you."

She was seventeen when she got his message out of the blue. A scared little girl who was petrified of feelings and anything relationship related. So she never replied to his email.

All this time I never learned to read your mind I couldn't turn things around (I couldn't turn things around) 'Cause you never gave a warning sign (You never gave a warning sign)

Charles had a very little hope that she'd feel the same - why would she, such an amazing person, kind, fun and totally glorified in his eyes, so he could not even imagine him being worthy of her. But what if? What if he was enough? With every day when she did not respond to his email, his heart sank lower. Still, the pain of the first rejection is a hard one to take, because it's usually from a scared unexperienced heart to another and the clumsiness causes great deal of accidental collateral damage one remembers until the end of their life.

You're not my homeland anymore So what am I defending now? You were my town, now I'm in exile, seein' you out

She texted him from school few days after that - a normal text, as if nothing happened. Both of them were too chicken to address the situation openly. So he opted for buring his feeling and she for playing like she had no idea. Deep down, she always knew, even before he emailed her. They texted, continued to meet up. But it was never the same again.

Flashing back to New York City I was done, but you undid me Classic me to run when it feels right

It was hard to get closure for her. After all that had happened and the mess the two made for each other was a hard lesson she remembered vividly. She glanced at your first love again - and finally she met his look, after almost two years of managing to missing each other while they were both back in Monaco. She'd daydreamed about bumping into him, the two chatting and smiling again. The world stopped again for few moments. He shot her an unsure quick half smile that said it all. She knew him too well for that.

And now I wish we never met 'Cause you're too hard to forget While I'm cleaning up your mess I know he's taking off your dress

It was her prom night and she could not be more excited. All her friends were here, family, even Charles managed to get in town to watch her dance and drink all night. She had the night of her life, perfect end to end this chapter of life. The excitement her eyes held was contagious. She spent the first half of her evening with the family and Charles, sharing few dances and laughs. If felt like the good old days. But one shot of tequila led to another and there she was, drunk as pirate and unhinged like a teenage girl. Charles did his best to keep her parents at bay, keep them occupied while he got one of his friends to take care of her. He was worried she might do something stupid, like walk up to the stage and fall down breaking all of her bones. Finally, her parents decided to leave without having to saying goodbye to her after Charles spent a good half an hour convincing them she was just in the back stage and that he'd get her home safe. When they were gone, he began to search for her, only to finally find her sitting on the stairs, making out with the friend he assigned to keep an eye on her.

So take me to every party and just talk to your friends Why don't you let me down, I'll let you do it again Go on and walk all over me, just don't walk away Give me the worst of you 'Cause I want you anyway

It was like being cut open alive and having people watch. There was nothing even remotely graceful about her actions, she was literally sitting on the floor having a battle of tongues with another drunk teenager while people had to walk pass her. It was embarrassing. Charles didn't know what to do. He wanted to run away and never come back, but he couldn't leave her there alone. He couldn't bring himself to stop the two of his friends, because he was just too sad and heartbroken to do so. He just stayed nearby and kept an eye on them. It was one of the longest nights in his life.

She couldn't remember the second half of her prom night and Charles would never speak of it, even though she begged him many times. He always became stiff and started to leave the room. She only kept asking, because it marked one of the biggest shifts in their friendships. He became cold, unresponsive and after few weeks, he stopped communicating completely.

You were my town, now I'm in exile, seein' you out I think I've seen this film before

Funny how people's faces change with years, but the eyes stay the same. The eyes and the look. Charles looked at her the second time this evening. It was like staring back at the eighteen year old boy who was drowning in his feeling.

It was one of her last nights in Monaco before leaving for university. Finally, her dreams were coming true. She was more than ready to get our to show the world she was a force to be reckoned with. She sent Charles countless messages before her final departure, at that moment, she was sure she'll never ever get back to Monaco and wanted to at least understand why he became distant. One evening, he finally agreed to meet up and talk. She was over the moon. Knowing that she could always turn Charles over, she left feeling confident - he was one the very few people she was sure shared the same soul as her. It was as if they'd never stopped talking. Jokes flying everywhere, the two of them strolling around, having no idea this would be the last time (and maybe, that was better for her at the time). There was so much to share, the two kept talking over each other for hours. Charles was happy when she finally stopped to take a breath for a moment. She looked him in the eye and saw a look she'd seen countless of times on his face. There was a shift in her mind and out of nowhere, she was kissing the boy she'd been unknowingly in love for years. She'd realize that she loved him only once she started dating a random guy from her college, expecting the same feeling Charles gave her. But it never came. Had she known, she'd have stayed with him. He tried to convince her to start dating him. Almost begged her to try it with him long distance. But there was a whole world for you to discover, places to be and versions of her that needed discovering. She had kissed only once. But it was a kiss of a lifetime. He blocked her on all socials after she rejected him again.

I never learned to read your mind (Never learned to read my mind) I couldn't turn things around (You never turned things around) 'Cause you never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs) So many signs, so many signs You didn't even see the signs

The girls were laughing at some joke she missed while digging in her memory for traces of her first love. Charles Leclerc. He was sitting few tables away from her. This time, her heart sank as he kissed his girlfriend on the cheek as they walked away from the bar. She wanted to run to him, to talk to him again after all those years. To tell him the same thing he once emailed her. To explain that she was just too young to notice she had the love of her life right next to you. But she knew all too well what his answer would be. And just like he had back then, she never wanted to hear it out loud.

And I know that you don't, but if I ask you if you love me I hope you lie, lie, lie, lie, lie to me

part 2

[dantesunbreaker]

Hey Ghestie! If you are currently taking requests, may I please have some headcanons for how Copia & Secondo (individual headcanons for them ofc) act as father figures to a Sibling of Sin 🥺 preferably one w/anxiety and is touch starved totally not projecting

Fatherly Papas

Of course Ghestie! Though I took the liberty of doing all the Papas because I also could use some fatherly Primo in my life. Also I'm posting this while on mobile so I am scared to see what it looks like when I get back to my computer 😅

Primo

There are many days spent working in Primo’s garden together. Not only just because Primo needs help with the physical labor in his older years, but because it is a quiet relaxing activity that gives you time to bond with each other

Physical touch is often, ranging from small reassuring pats on the hand to warm heartfelt hugs pulled tight to his chest. Primo wants you to physically feel the promise that he will always be there in your time of need

Sits and listens to you troubles as an active listener, asking questions that get to the root of the issue and then offering what advice and comfort he can if and when needed

Primo knows the signs of when you are getting burnt out or straining yourself too much while working and will bring you tea or treats that help you relax

Is beyond touched and flattered should you ever give him gifts on Father’s day, might even get a bit emotional. Will thank you by pulling you in for a hug followed by a chaste kiss on either the cheek or forehead. There is no toxic masculinity in him, so Primo is very open to giving kisses in non romantic relationships

Secondo

Secondo told you that you were always welcome to come to him in times of need, he never really expected much to come of it

On occasions that Secondo catches you in the halls or in public and notices you displaying signs of anxiety, he is quick to step in and help. Starts with a call of your name as to not spook you before putting a firm yet comforting grip on your shoulder

Even Secondo will admit he is not the best at comforting others, especially with his words. But that does not mean he will not give it his all

Brings you to his office so you have a private place to let go, sitting in silence as you let out whatever has been causing you to struggle

Once you have gotten everything off your chest, Secondo will pull you in for a tight hug, paying no mind to whether or not you are soaking his robes with tears

Will hold you for however long you need, a warm and comforting embrace that makes you feel safe and accepted 

As you are pulling away from the hug, Secondo will look you in the face while telling you how proud he is of you. Tells you that he sees everything you do, how hard you work, and he could never feel anything but pride at that. Success or failure, does not matter, Secondo will also support you and always be proud

Terzo

Absolutely wants to be seen as a sort of  “fun dad”, and always tries going out of his way to keep you smiling even when you really don’t feel like it

Terzo is very open about all sorts of physical affection and never holds back. Will give you as many hugs as you need, will brush your hair if it helps you feel calm, greets you with a kiss on each cheek, anything that you need Terzo would try to give you

Always wants to be caught up on whatever is happening in your life whether it be big or small things. If something important happens that Terzo doesn't know about it kind of crushes him because he will feel like he is failing as a paternal figure

Good active listener when you come to him needed to vent, responds with concern and empathy and always asks if you want advice for the issue or simply to get it out

Whenever Terzo catches you having anxiety attacks or getting over worked, he stops everything to whisk you off to do something more fun and relaxing. Sometimes this means impromptu trips to theme parks

Totally also gives you extravagant outfits for your birthday and Christmas

Copia

Equally touch starved, expect that when Copia provides comfort that it will entail a fair amount of physical affection

When walking together, Copia will place a hand either on your back between your shoulder blades or on your opposite shoulder 

Copia is also not always the best at comforting with his words, but his awkward ramblings and signature Copia noises are comforting enough at times

Makes you promise to come to him if you are ever struggling with anxiety or any other mental strain. Does not matter what time of day, Copia will always set everything aside to be there for you. Whether you just need someone to vent to or if you are seeking advice, he is there to offer what help he can

The times you come to him crying, Copia will hold you tight to his chest and softly reassures that you can get through this and that he is with you every step of the way

Honestly, the type of guy that would also treasure anything you ever make for him. Instead of hanging drawings on the fridge, he will hang them in his office. Also the type that would cry at your plays or dance recitals should you ever have anything of that nature. The ghouls go with Copia to keep him from making too much of a scene

Introduces you to the rats as “their much larger and less hairy sibling”, immediately feels nervous about it and will give you a look that says he is waiting for your response. It will make his day if you are on board with being a big sibling to his rat children

[unowner]

YOU!!!

YOU…HELLO….I HAVE AN UNOWN OF THE V VARIANT. IT HAS NOT STOPPED FOLLOWING ME AND THUSLY I HAVE DECIDED TO TAKE IT INTO MY CARE AS IT IS HAVING ISSUES FLOATING AND I BELIEVE IT COULD NOT SURVIVE ON ITS OWN.

HOWEVER! I AM CURRENTLY LEARNING HOW TO TAKE CARE OF ONE, BUT IT IS HARD TO FIND RELIABLE RESOURCES … MAY I HAVE ADVICE… ARE THERE CERTAIN BEHAVIORS I SHOULD LOOK OUT FOR? IS THE FLOATING ISSUES CHRONIC OR ACUTE? DO YOU KNOW!!!

- @geosengespiral

Incoming text wall, I have a lot of opinions on caring for Unown correctly

The floating issues can be caused by many factors, for example N when I first brought it home simply collapsed from chronic exhaustion once given the option to rest, nowadays it’s doing better and can once again float and move around

So a lack of energy is definitely a possibility- I’d look into seeing if the Unown is exhibiting signs of exhaustion or illness, as that can also drain its energy

Although the issue can be chronic if the Unown was born with it or otherwise injured in some way, I doubt it would’ve lived long enough to follow you around if that were the case. I’d try to treat the Unown in any way you can, and until its recovery, try to accommodate for the disability? If it turns out to be chronic, accommodating early can help you prepare for taking care of a disabled Pokémon

Taking care of Unown is difficult. Be prepared for sacrifice time and certain luxuries. A lot of people take them in simply because of the novelty and uncommon idea of owning one in general, but they are NOT show pokemon. A lot of people seem to think they’re low maintenance because of their mystique. The matter of the fact is that if you don’t understand your Unown all that well because it’s being mysterious and shy, then that pokemon DOES NOT TRUST YOU. They are naturally social creatures. If it doesn’t seem to want to be around you a lot, it’s not because it’s a “mysterious and ancient Pokémon”, it’s because you are doing something wrong, or it’s because the Unown has something going on. DO NOT take in Unowns if you do not have the time to be able to be with them and keep them company, or at least get other Pokemon to do it for you if you aren’t willing. They’re slow to warm up to people because of how secluded they’ve been from us, but if it is STILL avoiding you after a long time of owning it, you need to change your care for it

Unowns need enrichment, you do not, I repeat you do NOT leave them in open spaces with literally nothing to do. They are not decorations. Invest in some toys and items for the Unown to interact with, me personally I have a few Skitty toys and a Skitty tower or two for my Unowns. I’ve had to come home early from work many times because of them, and at this point I’ve cut my availability hours to be able to spend ample time with them. You also cannot expect Unowns to act like more domesticated Pokémon breeds, you can only train them to some degree and then hope that they won’t destroy your house.

As for behaviors, they can be real ominous at times- this is normal. It may look like it is summoning a demon, it is not. If it is, well I guess you’ll have to deal with that

And of course, each Unown has a varying personality, and you’ll need to accommodate to the individual. Most Pokécenters are able to provide basic care for one, but if there’s a severe issue you’ll probably have to find a specialist

Also they like playing in lawn sprinklers :)

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for disliking my close friend’s new date?

All names are placeholders and aren't the actual names of the people involved.

My friend (Harry) and I are currently seniors who are part of a friend group that goes way back to 6th grade. But, all of us have known each other since 1st grade as we go to the same school. We only formed in 6th grade.

In 7th grade, there were a lot of transferee students in my school and one of those transferees wanted to become close to us, but here is the catch; they (Dina) only wanted to get close to us because they had a crush from someone (Sean) in our friend group.

One day, Sean has been telling our friend group that Dina is stalking them, to where I distanced myself from Dina. Dina would ask anyone from our friend group on who Sean is, what they do, what they like, etc.

Sean often complains about this once they find out what was happening. Someone (Penelope) who was closer to Sean than the rest of us was pretty pissed off with the way Sean was treated, making them talk bad about Dina and all that.

At this point, the entire friend group, including me, hated Dina for continuously stalking Sean (after being told many times to stop) and we would often talk about Dina in our group chats, saying how much we dislike Dina and the like. Keep in mind, Harry is also in this group chat AND has heard us talk about how we hate her and all.

Dina was trying all sort of things to get close to us. This is when Harry decided to volunteer for us and become friends with Dina so they could stay away from Sean. Harry would talk with Dina and try to avert their attention away from Sean.

This somehow worked as we didn't hear much from Dina, especially when the pandemic hit us. We didn't hear much from Dina after that, and we especially didn't hear Sean complaining anymore.

In 10th grade, our school had limited face-to-face classes and this was around when the virus wasn't as threatening anymore. Most of us joined these classes as we were getting tired of being in a zoom class all day. At least four of us were classmates, but Penelope and I weren't classmates.

This is where the hatred towards Dina worsened. Dina came back, stronger than ever, to stalking Sean again as they have joined the limited classes as well.

Dina was in another class and since we only had half-days for these classes, they would wait outside of the classroom Penelope was at and would ask them how Sean was and what they were doing. Penelope, at this point, was fed up with Dina so they mostly ignored Dina until these classes ended.

After graduating from 10th grade and moving up to 11th grade (which is the senior year here), the pandemic ended and face-to-face classes were back in full force, where everyone in the school could attend now. Sadly, Penelope and one other friend from the group moved schools.

During 11th grade, we didn't hear much from Dina, which was a good sign that they weren't into Sean that much anymore.

However, around this time was when lovesickness hit Harry hard. At least two people in our friend group had gotten dates in this time, so it must've made Harry feel lonely or something.

Harry soon told us that they had gotten a crush (Mara) that especially hit them hard as they would give their crush gifts. Harry even got the confidence to tell the friend group (cue the teasing from us) who it was. We all supported Harry until they got to the point of confessing to Mara. Unfortunately, Mara to tell them to wait for a while as Mara figures things out. Fast forward to Christmas (a month since the confession) and Mara told Harry they weren't ready for a date and told Harry to stop giving them gifts and being all affectionate.

This got Harry down in the dumps for a whilr, but they didn't give up. Two months later, they got another crush, but this time they didn't tell the friend group who it was this time. They only John (someone from the same friend group) as they were in the same class as this crush

Harry, at this point, decided to take it slow and not immediately confess after knowing the person for a month. Harry gave us some hints on who it was and John was also keeping their part in keeping Harry's new crush a secret.

We didn't hear much about Harry and this new crush of theirs. Harry didn't talk a lot about them and the friend group only knew what class their new crush was from. This continued until summer arrived, where we didn't even know if Harry had confessed or not (John said Harry never did).

Around a month into summer, Harry started sharing some screenshots in the group chat of them chatting with someone where the two of them got along. We were pretty sure that this was Harry's crush that they always talked about in the group chat, so we teased them a lot about this person.

Another month went by where Harry still continued sharing screenshots of this person. That is, until one day they revealed that they asked this person out and they started dating. We all congratulated Harry for finally getting a date after their previous heartbreak.

The only thing left was for Harry to reveal who this person was.

Harry told us they'll reveal who it is after they got their first date. A couple of days later, they got their date and Harry finally revealed to us who it is with a bonus screenshot

It was Dina.

Their new date was Dina and you can imagine the reactions from us, especially Penelope's reaction.

Of course, we tried our best to be supportive to Harry and their new date, but just wait until we got into a Discord call where Harry was too busy to join. Penelope went absolute ham and started talking about why Harry had dated Dina, of ALL the people. Harry could've dated someone Penelope didn't know, but no, they dated Dina. Dina, of all people.

I was also puzzled by this. I didn't understand how Harry dated the one person the ENTIRE friend group disliked. We had talked about how much we hated Dina for stalking Sean in the group chat HARRY was in. I kept questioning it over and over again, of course I also relayed this over to Penelope. Like, Harry is literally AWARE we hate Dina and yet they dated them?

However, the funniest reaction was from Sean. Penelope told Sean Harry was dating Dina, and Penelope asked how Sean felt of Harry dating the person that stalked them for so long. They only said "good luck with them."

So, back to the question at hand. I only feel like an asshole as this is my friend's date I am talking about. A friend who had been desperate to get a date. Once they finally did get a date, the friends who are supposed to be supportive towards them wanted them to break up with their date.

What are these acronyms?

[emmatgc]

Wonderful World Part 9

I Found Love (where it wasn’t supposed to be) 

Seon Yul POV 

“And I've moved further than I thought I could

But I missed you more than I thought I would

And I'll use you as a warning sign

That if you talk enough sense then you'll lose your mind

And I found love where it wasn't supposed to be

Right in front of me

Talk some sense to me” 

This is Seon Yul’s current favorite song listening to it upon arriving at their rented dorm just outside the hospital they will be studying for a short course. This is on replay button. He can’t help but feel this is his song for her and towards her. It is 1pm in Germany, and it is 8:00pm in Korea. He wasn’t able to call upon landing an hour ago since everything went fast when they were fetched by the dorm master and showed their place. He doesn’t want to be rude and all, so he just texted Soo Hyun, smiling like a teenage boy “I’m here” and I miss you already”. 

He is now sitting and wondering if he calls her since its kinda late at night 

“I don’t know exactly where this feelings of mine started for HER. When my Mother told me to stop my revenge plans years ago, God, it feels like a decade ago but still raw.  All I wanted was to ruin her and make her feel the pain I was feeling. It started with a lie, everything. It wasn’t coincidence, I planned everything and somehow, the outcome was something I didn’t anticipated. I fell in love with her not knowing it was love. They say the opposite of love is hate and I believe that’s what happened to me. I tried to move on, and moved out away from her after that fateful day I went to her book signing event. That was 6 years after and I still felt the same. I was scared but I was sure. I wanted her. I don’t want anybody else. Hells be damn. I’d be lying if I didn’t feel conflicted. She killed my Father so how I can love her? It is twisted. I know. I wish I had answers but I don’t and I don’t care. Still, I would be fine if she didn’t love me back because the last thing I wanted is to force her and hurt her. We bleed the same. Now, she is saying we should give it a shot. Now, I am more than scared that I ever was. True, I want her but do I deserve her, really? What should I do now? God, I am acting like a greenly teenager having a huge crush on a teacher. Haha She is like a strict teacher in my eyes and I always have a thing for strong older woman. It is the reason I didn’t have girlfriends really and those younger than me, I treat them as lil sisters. I was attracted to more mature woman and Soo Hyun is just perfect. She is perfect. She was my torment but now she is my savior”

Checking his phone now, thinking of calling her… he continued in his thoughts 

“When I saw her at the airport time froze. I froze! I cannot believe my eyes. Is this some joke or am I dreaming? Then she hugged me and there it made sense. It is real. Honest to God, I wanted to kiss her right then but I held back for her sake. I didn’t know if she was ready. People say Im crazy but indeed I am. Now that I have her, or shall I say, we have a chance, she didn’t say she loves me yet, or is in love with me, we will take it slow like she said. Im happiest that I’ve ever been and I don’t want this to end. This is something new and everything is uncertain but she said “yes” to a chance and Im gonna try my very best to make her happy. I am sure of my feelings, the question is, will she be able to love me back?”

Soo Hyun POV

It is 8:00pm now, and Soo Hyun was restless and nervous. Will he call? Was it true, what happened at the airport? Maybe I am dreaming, maybe its all a bad joke. She is rumbling by herself. Then, her phone rang 

“I’m here and I miss you already” 

She dropped her phone and thank goodness she is in a couch. Her heart fluttered and her stomach felt butterflies. My gosh, she said, I am acting like a teenager! What should I reply then? Should I reply? Maybe tomorrow since its late already, he needs to rest but wait, our time zone is different now, she realizes. She prepared herself a tea to calm her nerves and it allowed her to think. Think about him and what happened at the airport. 

When Yoo Ra told me they were going abroad, I was shocked and I admit, I was feeling weird. Was I jealous? I know Yoo ra likes him. But I cannot stop thinking about him since he left the orphanage and I tried to stop thinking about him but I can’t. Im too old to feel this way. He is way too young for me and I….I killed his Dad. How can he love me like that? It is crazy. He is crazy. Whats crazier? Why am I feeling this way too? I want him but I know this is wrong. Who dares love the killer of his dad? This is some punishment from the Gods! Yet, if this is a sin then I guess I am willing to take. I want to be happy and I want to move on. I want to choose life and happiness and he….he makes me happy. I don’t know why and how but he does even those years ago, when we were at odds. I cared for him a great deal already. Not as guardian but as person, as a woman, too. Seon Yul didn’t know, I called the hospital and got Yoo Ra’s contact number. I lied that it has something to do about their work at the orphanage but really it wasn’t. We talked. She said “you are both crazy for each other and so if you have any feelings for him, then go with me at the airport and say it directly to his pretty damn face! Yoo ra is great. She is feisty. She should be the one with Seon Yul but He likes me instead. He is in love with me, he said. I like him, too. I want him in my life but truly, I am not sure if this is the same love I had for my husband yet. He was the only man in my life for a long time. But, I had to give my heart a chance this time. Gosh, am I doing the right thing? We bleed the same. The song I love entitled “where is my love” the lyrics there “Don’t she know, we bleed the same” hit me when I listen to it. When he was scared, I wanted to comfort him. When I was scared, he wanted to comfort me. He is like me with all the pain, the agony and sufferings. We can heal each other. We can move on. Together, we can. 

Drinking her tea..she continued “When I saw him at the airport, for the very 1st time, I found him so handsome. My heart skipped a beat. My goodness, I was crazy and acting like a school girl in front a crush! He is like the boy next door type after all. You know the guy across the street. Very pretty, handsome but really prettier than me. Haha.. I can sense his shock and disbelief and I wanted him to feel secured that I am giving this, Us…a chance. I like him and I want him to stay in my life. I don’t know how , or when it will stop of if I will stop but for now, it is what it is. I finally admit, I like him, too. I cannot deny it anymore. 

 It is 2pm now in Germany, Seon Yul is settled and he is worried because she didn’t replied. Is she asleep already? It is after all 9pm. He was about to call it a night when his phone rang… “I am glad you are there safely. Have you eaten? Don’t forget to eat promptly.” 

Haha he laughed. She is always thinking about feeding me and still so proper in her texts! Their “feeding” moments started the very 1st time they got to know each other. They talk over food and it made Seon Yul like her all the more. Seon Yul’s eyebrow slightly raised because she didn’t say she missed him back but it is ok he said, one step at a time. Trust the process. He wanted to reply “goodnight” already since he worries she might stay late if they still talk but he has to try. The boy has to try. He misses her already and he just wanted to hear his voice. 

There were 3 rings and finally, she answered. Seeing her phone rang and his name sent shivers to Soo Hyun. She is so nervous. 

Hello? She said. Hi, he replied.  Both were smiling. 

Seon Yul held his breath and there will silence. As always, Soo Hyun, the “mature” of the two, as she says it herself and she takes pride in it, ask how is he. 

How are you? I am glad your plane landed safely, Seon Yul.

It was a good flight. How are you? 

I am good. Im about to rest. 

Oh, Im sorry , I shouldn’t have called. We can..

NO, its ok. I am glad you called. 

Butterflies felt in his stomach. She is the only one who ca make him feel that way.. So…he said, he cleared his throat. Sorry, I don’t really know what to say, I’m such a mess. Im nervous, Soo Hyun. 

She laughed and replied “I am nervous, too. We are both crazy”. 

We are hahaha 

Have you eaten? You haven’t answered me yet. 

Do you miss me? You haven’t answered me either. 

Both answered simultaneously “I have, said Seon Yul and I do , said Soo Hyun. 

He has eaten and she misses him. 

Both seemed happy with their replies. 

Soo Hyun? 

Yes? 

What are we now? 

Hmmm… I don’t know. 

You don’t? 

I..am not sure but, exclusively dating? 

Seon Yul smiled so wide. His face is gonna hurt if he won’t stop smiling. 

Ok. 

OK? 

Yes. OK. We are dating. Exclusively. 

You don’t sound happy, Seon Yul? 

I can show you how happy I am but it won’t be appropriate Soo Hyun 

She shivered again. She finds him sexy just this instant. 

Is he flirting with me? Soo Hyun wonders. 

He sense the tension and maybe the shyness of Soo Hyun, and he broke it off, still smiling. 

We will take this one day at a time. Nice, easy and slow Soo Hyun, don’t worry. 

They thought they will talk for a minute or two but ended talking 2 hours. They talked about his room in Germany. She was pleased to know the decorations and such. He told her about his scholarship and she was very much impressed. He loves impressing her.  He asked about the orphanage and it seems they are comfortable as they can at least for now. They are friends after all and to level up, is another thing. 

You better rest and sleep now, Soo Hyun. 

Alright. Goodnight Seon Yul. 

Take care please? She added. 

Always. Goodnight and I…I love you. 

You are playing dirty, Seon Yul. 

I’m not. You are. 

See you, I mean, let’s talk again tomorrow. 

Someones excited to see me home already huh.mm

Let’s put the phone now, she said and embarrassed. They both laughed 

Goodnight. Goodnight.

They finally put the phone down and she slept. He on the other hand has to prepare for a meeting. They are now somehow together. They are exclusively a “thing”, dating” They like that word. 

For 5 weeks, the long distance “Sort of relationship” they have was a challenge but not a big one. Yet for Seon Yul, he started missing her so bad already. Seon Yul had a great time in Germany and in his last few days, he was ready to go home. He wants to see her so bad already. 

Yoo Ra will have a different flight and different day to go back. She will stay over for another week. Seon Yul can’t wait to go home. He wants to bring something for her. Yoo Ra helped him tour the city. 

“I meant to ask you, did you and Soo Hyun talked? That day at the airport. How did it happened? 

Yoo ra being funny and jealous of Seon Yul being in love and she, still single, said “I told her if she won’t pursue you, I will?” 

You did what? Seon Yul, about to get furious

Hahahaha..she laughed so hard. Relax, greenboy. I was joking. To cut the story short, we talked. Girl talk. That’s all. So, stop asking already. 

He bought her a cashmink scarf from FRAAS, an 18th century famous german brand. She likes scarfs and he wants to put it on her. Winter is coming and he also bought her a jacket and scented candles. He bought also Kaweco Fountain pens. Of course pens, he said! She needed pens for writing and book signing. Yoo ra can’t help but laughed at him. “You haven’t even bought 1 thing for yourself and Soo Jin, you are a bad friend, Seon Yul” She smacked him at the back. 

He bought a tea set for himself and wanted that tea set for them to use when she visits his home soon. He imagines Soo Hyun having tea at his house. He also bought basic building blocks for the kids in the orphanage. HE never bought a lot for someone ever before. Not even for her mother or father. He has it bad, he thought. 

Yoo ra bid goodbye and they will see each other in Korea next week. 

Seon Yul was packing when he heard his phone rang. 

It is Soo Jin 

Hey bro! I heard you are arriving tomorrow. I want to fetch you but I believe somebody is fetching you tomorrow, right? I don’t want to be the third wheel. Haha, Yoo ra said the same thing. Ill see you soon! Im gonna be mad if I don’t have a gift, bro! 

Seon Yul laughed and thought to himself he has the best friends in the world. Another less to worry in this crazy world they have now entered. 

Soo Hyun texted Seon Yul. “Ill see you tomorrow. “

See you tomorrow. 

I miss you… Seon Yul was shocked to read and he read it again to check if he is wrong or just sleepy right now. But it says right there, she missed him. It’s progress, he said. He giggled. 

He replied “I miss you more. See you tomorrow!”

The next day, Soo Hyun was early. She was excited. She missed him dearly. He was gone more than a month and the yearning and longing was strong for him. She can’t deny it further. 

An hour later…there he is. 

He has arrived. All wearing his gorgeous smile , pretty hair, in white. She wants to run towards her but her feet seems stuck and she can’t move. He is back. He is now my…my Seon Yul. Distracted, Seon Yul hugged her first. He smelled her and squeezed her. 

“Hi” he said. 

Hello, she answered. Welcome back…welcome home. 

Yeah, it is good to be back. 

Let’s go, she said. 

Wait, he said. He took the scarf and put it on her neck. The fuchsia pink scarf. He bought 3 actually. You look beautiful, he murmur.

There, you are ready now. We are ready now. 

Where to? He asked. 

Anywhere with you? she replied.

He chuckled. Sounds romantic, he replied.  They both have huge grin and acting so in love. 

Let’s go. He held her hands. This time though, she interlocked her fingers in his. They were holding hands, properly and romantically now. 

The dating era is about to begin. 

Indeed, they both found love where it wasn’t supposed to be. 

Note :  I do back up research on this story ever since just because also I am a researcher myself. From the places in Korea to the songs, the inspiration and just currently, about Germany, and its famous hospital areas and gifts. Originally, I intended for this to be a 1 shot story but I want to honor and craft slowly this slow burn love story of our favorite characters. They deserve it. I hope you are feeling what I am feeling. I surprisingly enjoyed this for months now. Writing this one, my ever 1st fanfic is very challenging but enjoyable. Now, instead of 10 chapters, this would be probably be 12 at least. So, thank you for sticking with my story. You don’t know how much it means to me. Here and on X (twitter) thank you so much for your support! Next chapter is called “Secret Lovers”. Enough said, the title is everything and more. See yah!

[tabbyhoney]

Gorgeous

Inspired by "Fear of you" from @sleepwalkersqueen

Note:The first chapter is done! My current goal is to write a chapter for each week but maybe it will take two weeks sometime but that is an issue for future me. I am really excited to see some feedback and how you guys like it:). On another note, while I try my best to keep a relatively straight line and facts with the original story some things might be wrong, please feel free to correct me if it happens ♥️. My current goal is a total of 5 chapters since I only want these to be a relatively short story that doesn't rewrite too much stuff happening in the original story because I obviously don't just wanna rewrite the fic. Please enjoy!

Next>>

Warnings: I am not a therapist so please take everything written here not as a prime example or as a fact, mention of torture, curse words

Chapter 1

I always wanted to see what more Tartarus had to offer. I wanted to explore every single floor there was. Meeting a new and more dangerous villain each day. Getting to know their thought process, if there really was a bigger masterplan behind it.

Answering my questions that spiraled in my brain like an endless loop. Are they actually wicked? Do they have any sign of humanity in them? Are they just broken souls? Can such a broken mind be fixed? Cliché I know.

All these questions are the real reason why I wanted to work here. Luck was on my side at the time I applied, because they wanted to test out if a therapist might be able to help them with their work (Which basically summarized that they wanted to get more information out of the patients).

But even when I worked with them they still continued with the methods they used before. This did not help make progress since I also had to work with their new experienced trauma which was already bigger than the universe.

If I am honest they were hesitant to hire me, since I graduated young from university and had no experience whatsoever. It took over a month and another month of internship to make them believe that I was cut out for the job. Even now they still don't fully trust me with their whole system. After all, I was a weak point for them.

Once I had the job I was more than thrilled. Finally able to do what I dreamed of since I was a kid. Even though there was still much to achieve. Of course, there is also the aspect of trying to make them stop their own ways for mine to finally be able to bloom just a little bit.

Seeing the number two pro hero walk up to me one day with his mighty steps that sounded like mountains crashing together I would lie if I said I didn't feel my heartbeat stop for a moment. Let alone when he talked to me for two seconds before giving me all I ever wanted with his angry and demanding attitude.

The moment I was granted this wish of mine I regretted it. Not because I stopped believing in my dream but because seeing the actual part of no one should know is frightening. Frightening might even be an understatement.

Their voice, movements, and the way their bodies looked were scaringly disgusting. The air smelt rotten and it was cold not only because of the temperature. People are being drugged out of their brains to keep them calm, they all look like corpses that have been exposed to warmth and air for too long.

From my plain observation, it even seemed like mutants are treated worse than the other prisoners. Which is a common thing even in normal standards of society. I cannot even blame them because mutants can be incredibly scary.

Tartarus. A name that ran a chill down each villain's spine. A place where the moment you step into you may never escape alive. Rumors spread across the underground like wildfire. About what will happen once you are captured and what you have to endure.

The villains that are imprisoned in Tartarus don't make the facility this scary I realized. Maybe the good people think that they are the reason for all this talk, but this is where they are wrong.

"Do whatever you want"

Just remembering those four simple words made my skin crawl. Goosebumps spread across my body. A sentence you might say to a child that you have no interest in dealing with. Or maybe to your trusted hairstylist.

But not to a licensed therapist who is capable of either destroying you or building you back up. Or to the guards who held the interrogation.

The meaning behind the words held something so incredibly heavy I wanted to forget every memory of someone saying these words, no matter who or when.

Because they meant it. They didn't care if I did my job right or not because I wasn't even supposed to be there. I could do whatever I wanted with the person in front of me. The people who have no way of defending themselves because of their chains and quirk suppressors.

-------------------------------------------------------

The air in the small bright room was filled with tension that I created by possibly the worst mistake ever. The guards who were still in the room with me looked at me confused. The only comfort I had at the moment was that the person I directed the mistake to couldn't answer at the moment. But even seeing his eyes shoot up was enough to make me rethink my life choices.

I can clearly feel my face losing its color out of shock from my totally unprofessional behaviour.

"you're so gorgeous"

Whatever ghost possessed me to say that clearly needed new activities to entertain themselves.

With the love for everything I possessed, I cleared my throat and sat down on the chair at the table they provided.

"You can take off the muzzle" my voice rang through the empty room with an echo. It left a chill in my body hearing it so metallic.

The guards hesitated for a moment before they actually started doing their job. They left the room when I gave them another glare, signaling to give us privacy like I asked them to.

Takami-San looked physically exhausted yet his eyes remained sharpness that you don't see very often in patients around here. He had a big grin on his face that I wished I could just wipe off of his face, even if I was the cause of this.

For some reason, he stayed silent. Maybe it was because he was already taunting me or he was waiting for me to introduce myself, I couldn't tell.

"I am Howashi Amaya, I will be your assigned therapist" I introduced myself, a genuine and respectful smile resting on my face.

"Therapist? Sounds fake, they don't care about how fucked up I am" he tilts his head to the side, eyeing me up and down like a bird.

"You're right they don't care, which is why they told me to do whatever I want"

For some odd reason, he seemed to tense up from these words, I wonder why.

"So I decided to just do what I am best at"

"Being a charming girl?"

At that, I took a deep breath. I scrunched my face and looked down at my empty sheet of paper.

When I looked back up he was grinning again god he looked so good stupid.

"Actually no. I meant I will try to help you"

"Help me get out of this shithole?"

"not really I am afraid"

"Ahh shucks"

I waited for a second before actually starting my usual procedure. Which on second thought seemed to be a little too late.

"How has it been?" I click my pen while looking at him, ready to write down whatever I could tell from his response.

"Really? Do you actually ask people this in fucking prison?" His voice sounds raspy.

"I didn't ask how you felt, just how it has been. You could answer nearly everything on it. How you feel, how the people treated you-"

"fucking brilliant, you should get a medal for being a smartass"

"Thank you for calling me smart, I appreciate it"

I silently tap my pen on the paper. Waiting for any kind of reaction from him. As the silence settled I started to notice some weird marks on his neck, they looked kinda infected.

"What do you have on your neck there?" I gestured with the pen on my own neck.

As soon as the question was spoken he tensed and looked more traumatized than a baby chicken that just discovered the big scary world. He broke off the eye contact he previously held with me. His body huddled up in an attempt to look smaller and protect himself, probably with his wings but he wasn't able to do it. Uncomfortable if I need to describe it in one word.

I probably don't need a deeper answer to figure out why they might be there. I silently stand up and walk around the table. He tried to move away from my hands when I reached out but because of the chains, he couldn't move far enough away.

Ever so gently I pulled the collar down and placed my hands on the marks. A familiar warmth spread across my hands and I started to feel how the infected wounds closed and healed.

When I was done I took a step back looking satisfied down at him before returning to my chair.

"Aye... Of course, the doctor has a healing quirk" he mumbles silently.

"Do you have anything you wanna talk about?"

" Aye, why are you here? Never heard of someone like you even working here. Doesn't seem like their style to hire a fucking therapist to fix me or anyone really"

"Good question" I nod in agreement "The answer is simple, I am the only therapist around here. That is why you've never heard of me. The last question shouldn't bother you too much after all you have been here for quite some time and are already in debt worth more than my monthly check"

"Have you ever seen a therapist before?" I ask with a light smile on my face.

"Do I fucking look like it?"

Silence.

"Besides I don't need another bitch asking me any more questions, I have the sparkler for that"

"Sparkler? You mean the number two?"

"Nah I mean the nice guard's captain obvious"

Another silence.

"And I don't need anyone knowing about the stuff I tell him, it's private business." He said in an oddly calm voice.

That certainly amazed me, since I have seen all the recordings of their talk, except the first one. So he wasn't aware that everyone was still listening in. Maybe this will one day be their downfall, why would he be so stern about keeping this a secret if it wasn't necessary.

"Why should no one listen in?"

"Because I said so"

This will be a lot of fun.

"Well with me you can talk about everything you share with Endeavour. No one is listening or watching. I like to keep my talks up to my hands, especially what I share with the government"

And that was not a lie.

-------------------------------------------------------

The room was filled with the sunlight shining through the window above the kitchen counter. The light shone through the leaves of the plants sitting at the window.

It was peaceful. The air was fresh and smelled faintly of fish and rice.

The only sound that destroyed the peace was the TV that played the news

Yet the only real news would be that someone escaped Tartarus and that still isn't public information. I wonder what will happen once the public knows.

Once I turned the TV off the silence that came with it was broken with a call. When I read who was calling I felt my mood drop just a little bit.

"Howashi speaking, what can I help you with today hottest hero in Japan"

"He escaped me!" The man yelled angrily, ignoring my terrible joke.

"who escaped you?" I ask grinning widely.

"Takami! That fucking mutant had his brat stealing my wife's necklace"

He has a child? Now that is a surprise. Even a bigger surprise was that he was stupid enough to let his child steal something from him.

"And how is that my problem?" I ask while standing up and staring out the window biting my nails.

"You worked with him for five years! You know exactly what is going on in his stupid birdbrain" Endeavour yelled. I am not even sure why he is yelling at me, I would hear him loud and clear with a normal tone.

"First of all that is extremely rude talking about mutants like that, I am one as well after all, and not even different from Shinyo. Second just because I worked with him does not mean I understand everything he does"

"But you know where he might go"

I nervously tap my fingers on the kitchen counter. Closing my eyes to contemplate if I actually know where he might go.

If I break it down it comes back to one thing, he has a child and is currently taking care of them. But knowing he has unfinished business makes it counterproductive to take care of a child who has to be at least five or four years old. He probably didn't even know the child existed since he never talked about having one, only about his wife Nitsuki.

Nitsuki? Right, he might be searching for her so he can give her the child. But why wasn't she with them?

"I might have an idea but to be honest it is not crystal clear that he is with her"

"Her?"

"Takami Nitsuki, his wife. If he has a child he will certainly not have any time to deal with it and will try to bring it back. The only question I still have is if she really left the child alone and why he has to bring it back"

"Those are two questions and I want you to come to my agency to discuss this further" he demanded. Almost sounded like I didn't have a choice.

"Alright, I can fly over, when?"

"Now" and he hung up the phone after that. Not even a goodbye.

Once I was dressed and didn't look like I just got out of bed. I walk outside of my apartment building taking off my suppressors.

Once I felt the warmth on my back and my wings regrowing I took a small jump before dashing into the air.

I just hope this story will end on a relatively good note.

[midnightshard06]

Fictober Day 23: "We can fix this, I know we can"

You can check it out on ao3 here if you prefer.

Summary: Shadow realizes that Maria actually was right about things getting better when he got to earth. Even if it was a rough road to get there.

Set in my Lost and Found AU

Warnings: None

Word Count: ~800 words

Shadow curled in on himself tighter as he heard the door to his room open. Were the scientists really coming to take him again? It felt like he’d only just finished the last round of tests. His body was still aching at the very least. “Shadow?” Maria called out to him and he instantly relaxed. Oh thank chaos it was just her. Slowly he uncurled himself and sat up facing her. She frowned as she took in the state he was in. He could imagine he didn’t look to be in a great state. The bandages around his arms hadn’t been tight enough when the scientists applied them, and while he’d tried to tighten them enough to be useful he wasn’t sure how well he’d done. At least he healed fast. “Tests today?” Shadow looked away and nodded. Slowly she came over and put a gentle hand on his head. He hated the way he had to fight back an instinctual flinch. “I can’t believe they can keep doing this to you. If only grandfather would actually listen to me, then…” She sighed before pulling her hand away. A small, but reassuring smile spread across her face. “I’ll get him to listen eventually. I just wish he’d stop being such a stubborn old man.”

‘It ok.’ Shadow signed clumsily. He was still trying to get used to the hand movements, but he’d been doing his best to practice when he could.

“The way they treat you is not ok. I need you to understand that.” Maria frowned. "We can fix this though, I know we can. I just… need to get through to grandfather and then things will be better."

'Hope you right.' Shadow frowned. He wanted to believe Maria, he did, but it was hard to imagine things changing. 

"Trust me." Maria took his hands. "Once we get down to earth everything will be better."

Shadow sighed as he pushed the memory away. The only reason he'd been thinking about his time on the Ark at all was because of the recent acquisition of the Project Shadow files that still existed in G.U.N.'s database. Currently Sonic was pacing back and forth, careful of the flowers in the backyard, to presumably let off some anger. Shadow doesn't think he'd ever seen the hedgehog so upset before. It made him weary to ever do anything that would have that anger aimed at him. "Everything they did was beyond messed up! How can you treat a living, thinking being like that!?" Sonic threw his hands in the air as he finally stopped pacing. "Where's the nearest G.U.N. base? I just wanna talk…"

"Sonic…" Tails, who'd been sitting nearby, sounded like he was warning an unruly child. "As satisfying as destroying government property might be for you, it won't change anything. The project happened over 50 years ago. The likelihood of anyone directly involved still being with G.U.N. is low." Sonic made a frustrated noise and continued with his pacing. "How are you holding up Shadow?" Tails turned to him.

'Not sure. Still processing.' Shadow quickly signed. No reason to be dishonest, even with his thoughts still swimming. 

"That's understandable." Tails nodded, his ears dipping. "For what it's worth I really am sorry you had to go through all that."

'It is-' Shadow stopped himself. It wasn't ok. He knew that. 'Thank you.'

“Better yet.” Sonic snapped his fingers. “Where’s the emeralds? I bet I could use them to go into the past and give those creeps a piece of my mind.”

“They scattered the last time you used them.” Tails sighed tiredly. “We haven’t got them again for a while because Eggman hasn’t been doing much of anything except spending time with Sage.”

“We have the one…” Sonic hummed.

“We’re not going to hunt down the emeralds so that you can potentially go mess up the timeline. Have you considered what it would do to our present if you went back and changed anything?” Tails looked mildly annoyed.

Sonic opened his mouth like he was going to challenge that before he closed it. His brow scrunched up in thought before he sighed. “Ok fine. You’re right.”

“As usual.” Tails chuckled.

“Yeah as usual.” Sonic rolled his eyes playfully before walking over to Shadow. “While I… can’t stop what happened to you before I can keep trying to right the wrongs now.” He hesitated before holding out a hand. “We’ll fix this. As long as me and Tails are around, those jerks won’t get anywhere near you again. If they try well… I’m not above going against authority.”

Shadow looked at the offered hand for a moment. For a second he could almost imagine it was Maria. Finally on earth. He took a deep breath before taking the offered hand. Well he was happy to know that Maria had been right. When he got to earth things really did get better.

[pommunist]

Going off of this one anon that said something about never working in a real environment... first of all, that anon spoke nothing but truths and I totally agree with everything they said. Now what I wanted to say was to your response, line by line.

"Fact is that we’re almost two months after things went public and these signs are nowhere to be seen." Firstly, multiple CCs have said changes have been done behind the scenes and trust in the process. We won't see these changes, because we aren't working internally. This makes sense.

"I think it’s not abnormal to want to be sure these things aren’t happening anymore before they continue supporting it" There is no proof of things being this way. As a matter of fact, the admins that we know of that are still on the project, are enjoying their time and making changes of going back to normal. Most of the statements of mistreatment come from people who worked months ago, before this was made public. Currently, the fact that things are slowly returning to normal, is a very good sign. This means that things are stabilizing behind the scenes.

"Voicing criticism can also be a way to try to avoid problems being swept under the rug as it had been until Léa shared her experience" This is also true, you are correct. However, there is nothing new to be talked about. This is like beating a dead horse. We know the treatment was bad. We know the conditions were horrible. However, now it's being fixed and worked upon. This we know is the case now. Therefore, talking about old subjects eventually gets tiring for everyone involved and stops being productive. At this point, it's just public venting.

"as long as it’s with respect of everyone involved." This is entirely true. Except nobody respects Q in all of this. Nobody extends this respect to Q, who also got taken advantage of. It is unfair for him as well and nobody is defending him. If people do defend him, then suddenly they're harassed, they don't care about workers rights, etc. and it's what's causing this divide now. Nobody can defend Q -not even CCs, anymore - without getting treated like shit. Look what happened with Tubbo, who gets treated like a child who doesn't know anything. Look at Missa, who felt personally hurt by attacks made on Q. He wasn't even involved and he felt horrible about it all. Everyone who says "respect everyone involved" ends up not extending that respect to Q. I am not implying that you personally attack Q, but I have seen several people who say this exact line, then go to attack Q. Tweets calling Q white, posting his address, his phone number, full name, etc. get thousands of likes. And people saying "hey this is weird" end up getting swarmed.

"And people keep being angry because they keep hoping for the project to improve, without getting signs it will." The issue here is that we have gotten signs. From the admins making their projects on the QSMP, from CCs talking about their good experiences, those are all good signs. But nobody takes those good signs as truth, for some reason. We have been getting these good signs but they're brushed off as "they don't know everything" or "this isn't what I wanted to see" which is parasocial as hell. I don't know how to put it any other way but it's insanely parasocial to demand to see such specific changes from the QSMP. It doesn't align with what you think should be done. You don't even know what's going on behind the scenes, like, at all. Anyone on Twitter making "new" statements are all from people who aren't even in the project anymore. Because these are coming out now, people have this false impression that nothing changes. When in reality, nobody knows what's going on right now except those still involved. Like Pierre, like Phil. Who both know more than you or I ever will. And it should stay that way. I don't want to know the extent of what either of them know. Because it should stay confidential. I, as a viewer, shouldn't even know half of this. I shouldn't ever know this unless I am a worker there. This wasn't even intended to be made public, it never should have been. This was going to be handled already. Pierre and Q both said that they were planning on dealing with this. This was made public for zero reason. The truth is, complaining isn't going to get anyone anywhere. It's like trying to clean up a mess and you have someone in your ear complaining about how long it's taking you to clean despite you trying your damn hardest to clean.

To end this statement off, I do not intend for this to be some kind of attack on you personally. It isn't an attack at all, to be quite frank, this is moreso to the arguments you presented that I have seen splayed across Twitter, Tumblr, anywhere. I truly think this constant complaining and constant detail-orientation is getting nobody anywhere. All this is doing is just distracting from the big picture:

Q put someone in charge of a project, whom he falsely trusted.

As a result of this, for about a year, this person created horrible working conditions and used their position of power to hide most of this (or the full gravity of the situation) from Q.

Q was made aware of this, and was planning the proper steps to deal with this privately.

However, this was made public for no real reason, and now he has to deal with this while dealing with the public eye, misinformation, and also privately too.

Due to people leaving and leaking certain details, he cannot be as transparent as he wants to be.

He is also dealing with legal cases which prohibit how much he can say, also limiting which people can get the information he can say.

Although the operations within QSMP are slightly turbulent, things are being done slowly to stabilize them, which includes garnering funds to pay back the people who were exploited and insufficiently paid.

That's the entire story. People are so wrapped up in details that they forget everything that led to this. Again, this wasn't directed specifically towards you, I have nothing against you. But some arguments you presented have their counterarguments as well and I wanted to present them.

man what an ask to wake up to after opening tumblr at 7am uh

First link to the post you’re referring to anon because I still stand with everything I said AND might repeat some of it here :

-I’m glad some ccs have said things are moving behind the scenes, I’m not doubting their words. However I don’t make my personal opinion based on what a cc says. There is nothing wrong with withholding support to a project until there is any concrete indication that things are solved. Already pissed I did so for almost a year, won’t make the mistake twice !

-There was no proof of things being bad for 10 months before admins came out with their stories, we trusted that they were being treated fairly because there was no reason to think otherwise, look where that got us. "Most of the statements of mistreatment come from people who worked months ago" well not only do we know that there are admins who are still within the project that are not being communicated with, but maybe the reason most statements come from people who used to work for Qstudios is because since then at least 50 people have been fired/had to quit ?

-"At this point it’s just public venting" Yes, maybe, and ? People who are angry about this don’t owe patience, productivity or anything to the QSMP. I would argue that Qstudios could fix everything perfectly overnight and people would still be allowed to be angry that it even happened.

-About Quackity I’m not sure I see your point here because obviously it’s stupid to go harass, insult, threaten him or anything close to that. It’s different from actual criticism about his actions and negligence. I can have no respect towards his work as a company owner while also believe he deserves basic human decency ?

Let’s not forget that yes, he might have been fucked over by that One admin, but also the repeated mistreatments over months was made possible because neither Quackity nor anyone else was keeping an eye on what was going on behind the scenes.

-Once again, ccs talked positively about it before, admins were doing projects before, and yet things were shit. When I say signs of things improving I mean ex admins being contacted, statements that those still working are doing so with an actual legal framing and protection.

It is not parasocial to ask that a company upholds workers rights and have something to show they’re doing so. Wouldn’t that make the goddamn union parasocial ? 😭

And I’m glad if some of the admins still currently working are able to do so in the right conditions, obviously not wishing for more people to be mistreated. Doesn’t change the fact that those who have been have not seen any improvement of their situation. Plus we know that even before everything came out, not everyone was treated the same.

Again, this was not made public for zero reason. It was made public as attempts from the admins at solving it internally had been met with silence.

Complaining does get you somewhere. Admins complaining and people using their voices to shine light on their statements and the issues they raised got that Quackity talked about it and started to make changes. Complaining about and withholding support from a company do hold them accountable to a certain extent, and push them to improve the work conditions. Workplace abuse thrives under silence and people keeping their mouth shut.

To reuse your metaphor about cleaning : If you break a glass and start cleaning the shards, people can still point that the glass is broken, and they can still complain about the cleaning if you’re doing a sloppy job at it.

About your recap of events, I have already talked about some points but also :

-The "leak" argument just has to stop for real. Not only it is incredibly inaccurate to use that word to talk about admins sharing what they went through, if you truly want to fix stuff you shouldn’t care first about your actions being revealed.

-Any admins who are to ask about fair payment shouldn’t have to wait until enough merch is sold or whatever. As a victim you shouldn’t have to be patient with the company and wait for them to get their shit together before you start getting some consideration.

tldr i guess : Cool that you’re able to fully trust a company that is responsible for unlawful treatment of their workers for months based on Quackity saying "don’t worry guys things are changing", but not me tho !

[lifenconcepts]

2nd October art prompts! (Open pictures for full view)

ahem.. do tell me if you’re uncomfy with being tagged xD

OC- tober “Going out on the town” chose my oc Neil, with him facing a cinema while leaning on his car. Absolutely atrocious perspective but that I’ll fix soon with some YouTube lessons.

Cosytober “Leaf” I chose a maple one as I struggled with it yesterday, plus did two random ones from memory/my heart.

Official inktober “Discover” which I brainstormed for a while before landing on the idea of an ant studying a human which is studying the ant, both holding magnifying glass to one another. The ant is wearing a coat, yes. Wanted to bring that Sherlock-esk feel to it.

OC-tober by @headphones-lifeform where I did that guy pointing in surprise meme with my oc Neil pointing at my oc Robin, no clue if they’d ever interact in canon but like.. bro would FREAK OUT over a creature as strange as Robin xD!

Cringetober “Fursona” which I was super excited about and made myself as a winged wolf, also felt like incorporating triangles into it so there’s some on his flank and shoulder/arm. Fun!

Occult-tober I think it is? Prompt “Sign” where i drew two faes around a stop sign and a smaller one saying “don’t give out names” yet the “n’t” is covered by one of them, with a quick background of a forest.

I adore octo-tober! Made Shellington wearing a fish costume. Why? Oh we could only speculate as to why… is he trying to blend in to study them? Going trick or treating? Or just being a silly guy? Maybe all of the above! Thanks to @4eyedloser for the prompts list, am awaiting the other days eagerly :3

Monstober “Werewolf” which I drew a man mid-shift, hands turning into paws, and the anguished wolf in the forefront of a moon.

Honestly still unsure about this one but wanted to participate nonetheless and I hope I understood the prompts right but yeah. A hen and a chick venturing an apple orchard!

Cringetober “Not like the other girls” where I drew a silly wolf-alike kid in a jacket doing that antler gesture at a very stereotypical portrayal of a female and also that same wolf kid watching a bug with a girl looking very confused at the situation.

For oc in my clothes I did Fhelix (whom I drew too short), Robin the goofy goober, and a quick snapshot of Neil. Currently in a sweater, black jeans, and slippers. Lol. I could find something better in my wardrobe for them but doesn’t be bothered so just referenced myself

Goretober “Bloodspill” did a man looking sad over a cup of blood being spilt while his own chest spills blood. Not my best work but I just thought I might aswel share since I ain’t going to be redoing it.

For beetle’s inktober “Stone” I did a moth on a rock that’s being hit by a wave of water, a crusty butterfly, and some odd other flying creature.

Favourite oc I didn’t have and so I simply drew all of them (that I can remember since I have a couple odd ones like Flint or Saik who despite I adore dearly I don’t have much art on.)