#i am clearly out of touch
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Hello!! I'm really sorry to interrupt your Sonic kick, it's been wonderful to follow your rewatch of Underground, but I've been wondering this for a while so I thought I'd ask...do you have any thoughts on Paldea as a region, and what Ash's journey through there could look like?
...bc to be honest, I'm incredibly sad that MY region (paldea is based on the iberian peninsula and I'm from Spain) has a sucky design (region design has always been one of my favorite aspects of the pokemon games) and is the only one so far Ash hasn't gone to :(
I loved your thoughts on ash-in-galar and how the regional style would be like and stuff, so I'd be super happy to learn my favourite pokemon (and sonic!) writer and worldbuilder had poked at it some :) and if not, that's prefectly okay! I know I've been avoiding all the more recent pokemon stuff myself haha
Oh, wow, I so wish I could answer this, because I love talking about any franchises - I'm just trying to focus on Sonic because the FIC MUST BE FINISHED SO HELP ME.
But unfortunately I just... haven't been in Pokemon, and I don't really know the Paldea region. From what I've heard about the games, I actually suspect I'd have more to say about it on a literal professional level (projects and development are my thing, and the whole thing reeks of someone trying to enforce agile iterative development without having an actual roadmap - total budget crunch to user experience detriment).
Yes I appreciate that sentence probably doesn't make any sense to normal humans. I'm sorry.
But from what I do know about it, I'd say it would be a pretty poor fit for Ash. There have been Pokemon Schools since the first games, but the reason people objected to Ash attending the Pokemon School in Alola is because he's supposed to be a traveller and explorer, and keeping him confined to a single city felt wrong. It proved doable, kind of, but...
Whereas Paldea seems quite... -vague gesture- contained. The fact the main character is a student of an ACADEMY enforces a kind of rigidity that doesn't fit with Ash. He would be the problem child, and that would derail him back away from being the strong hero that he has been since X&Y.
You could expand on the world, definitely. Grow it beyond what was in the games. But then some people would cry foul, and... egh.
But I'm talking out of my ear. So... I'm afraid all I can offer are sympathetic winces that your region is so poorly represented. Hopefully we'll see better in the future.
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can’t help but think of how, if we choose to go by sirius’ characterisation as a private, arrogant teen who only lets a select few into his circle, sirius’ post-azkaban life just have been such an utterly humiliating experience for him.
especially OoTP. when he has all these near strangers in his childhood house, that he hated and loved and ran away from and couldn’t ever escape. if he spent his entire pre-azkaban existence building a cold and aloof persona, not letting people know what his home life had been like, then to have all of these people get a front row seat to it because of kreacher and portrait walburga’s shenanigans must have been near unbearable. to have the entire order, including snape whom he disliked and mistrusted, hear the kinds of names he’s being called.
not only does he have to deal with the retraumatisation of his childhood, but also the fact that he’s flayed open for everyone to see. it’s not only his freedom, innocence, dignity that has been snatched from him but his privacy also. it’s such a cruel thing to experience, on top of everything else.
to have literal children, his godson who he has been kept away from all this while, whom he presumably wants to be able to look up to him, to have him see into the deepest parts of his soul. to have to be so weak in front of him. not only is he subjected to such vileness but he also cannot do anything about it.
sirius has not had a moment of peace in all the time we knew him. it is indignity upon indignity that is heaped onto him. every other character has gotten a moment of respite but him. it fully breaks my heart.
#sirius black#i am in the mood to sob tonight clearly#i just#was reading a fic#where it recounted walburga ad kreacher’s screams and taunts#and it suddenly hit me how humiliating they are?#like#even if it’s an inanimate object and a house elf#to be called an embarrassment and shame of my flesh and filth#by the only remaining members of your family#and to have it be traced back to your family#to know that your mother was alive but did not care that u were in azkaban#and that everyone else knows it too now#to walk around in every corner of your childhood house and be able to see exactly how u grew up#no boundaries no limits#to have other people keep touching parts of your family with the audacity to throw them out#and move it around#to call your home names#i just. cannot imagine.#the level of helplessness he was operating with#is it really any wonder he was the way he was#hell. he was actually so much better than he should’ve been#lesser men would’ve been catatonic or going off on a rage fuelled warpath#it’s so embarrassing to have your parent even correct u in front of friends sometimes#and to hear all this abuse. shouted at you.#and not one person ever stands up for him#or shows him any empathy#i’m actually amazed that even after all these years i’m able to find new tragedies in sirius life#HAS THAT MAN NOT BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH#pen’s notes
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I started drawing this next day after I finished Act 6
13 or so days and it's finished!
Main things are traditional and Loop's body was edited digitally after
Unedited it looks like this
I've been torn on how to do Loop's body for the entirety of lining, also
A bit sad the main lines are visible only as a wip, most of this thing is literally just a ton of sharp lines
I think it's also my first day of drawing, Loop is just a sketch here (feat. my leg)
I even finished the beans before it so they were a moral support, because if you let me things like this take a year
#fanart#my art#isat#isat fanart#in stars and time#isat loop#loop#traditional art#artists on tumblr#Phew#So anyway this was my way of figuring out my thoughts after finishing the game#I didn't even actually finish it with credits playing at that moment#This type of art is my therapy#And in a way literally how my personality works from big figures to small details of thinking about anything#It's really calming!#I won't tag paper figures but they're here#Like special guests#In any case the funniest thing was showing this to my English teacher and she was like 'wow this looks stressed' or something#Like she immediately looked at the lines and after I showed her my old Flowey drawing like this she was like#'oh it makes sense! This one looks calm but this one is clearly you not feeling good'#Because I was kinda#Like sitting there in the semi-park and feeling sick since morning before I started drawing this and slowly I got better#I already talked about this on my first 'big' isat thing - I needed to think a bit#And not think at the same time just literally letting myself sort stuff out#Like. I fell asleep at 6 am that day and woke up at 10 4 hours of sleep after playing full Act 5 and two hats stuff IS STRESSFUL#SUPER STRESSFUL! Like I felt like I was playing for 4 hours while sleeping#Anyway by the time I finished it aka today I'm feeling way better and I'm literally talking a walk right now#Touching grass as we speak#Anyway phew!#Now to that animatic that's plaguing my mind to draw it nowww
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fellas is it gay to remember your lover as a corpse of the man he used to be?
#silco#arcane#zaundads#young silco#screenshot redraw#slightly... i gave up with the glass#it started off as practice#this show does that doesnt it?#and then seeing everyone's brilliance#i am so amateeeeeeeur but i'm finally enjoying myself drawing#its a good thing vander is built like a mountain#with all that fucking guilt he's carrying#viktor knew his whole backstory with a touch#i would love to write a fic of him exploring#the part of his psyche where silco is clearly kept#or maybe there's a fic out there?#anyway corpsy silco is one of my favorite looks ngl#my shit
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You should stay away from me. I'm no longer with the gang. I didn't agree. Our boss already agreed four years ago. Pull over and let me out of the car. I'm your boss!
KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 01 / Ep. 09
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#nat chen#chen bowen#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#userspring#uservid#userrain#userspicy#userjjessi#pdribs#*cajedit#*gif#again. INSANE that they opened the show with this and then were like. 'these are side characters' like. NO! (& wild how the finale was 90%#them being happy while zherui was getting stabbed. like. clearly the writers knew who the true main characters were lmaooo)#ok anyway i honestly really love the breath chen yi lets out once he gets the door shut. like. its real. its happening.#the RELIEF as well as the determination to have ai di for real in front of him again#and also insane that the first time they touch after four years is chen yi putting ai di's whole body over his shoulder#like. last time they touched was ai di touching chen yi's hair while he slept#does anyone else think about that. does anyone think about the fact that the last time they touched was when they slept together#does anyone else think abt what ai di is experiencing trying to keep chen yi from touching him#but also loving him for coming to pick him up from prison. do you think about the combination of ai di's desperation and dread#compared to chen yi's desperation and relief. like does anyone else think about the combination of gentle and rough or just me#i made half of this while on an airplane yesterday thats how insane for them i am <3
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Started writing a fic back in early October and had to abandon it for a while due to IRL situations. But I've started working on it again little by little, and I am so excited to eventually share it with my mutuals and followers. I hope you guys enjoy it (I am trying my best to get it done)!
TBH my only motivation anymore is thinking about my friends having a good time reading it when it's finally posted (I love all of you very much). I cannot wait for all of these ideas to be fleshed-out on paper at last.
Over 16,000 words and I am nowhere near satisfied yet. I feel like I can write WAY more. Stay tuned!
#for anyone wondering the fic is dusknoir/grovyle centric but I PROMISE that I did not forget their girl Celebi#she loves them as well and they love her#but the entire thing takes place during Dusknoir's reconciliation w/ Team Wish#the doodle above is from a scene that I wrote!!#Echo and Dusknoir have lots of conversations#they are working on mending their relationship with each other#also dusknoir is holding his hands folded and out in front of him so Echo can clearly see them at all times#he knows that she's got some trauma with grabbing/touching when its w/ him specifically and he's trying VERY hard to accommodate her#in reality Echo could give a shit about him doing that for her but it's the thought that counts (she secretly appreciates it)#bonus that Sora also gets some resolution with Dusknoir too because lemme tell ya my girl NEEDS it#(scribz / fuji / zerger ) thinking about you guys each day fuels my desire to finish this damn thing so pls know that i love you#pmd eots#pmd2#my art#my fic#echo/umbreon#sora/lucario#not sure how long until this is actually posted cause my life is a horrible mess atm but I am hoping not too long!!#time to disappear back into the void because job hunting is the literal worst
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2023 reads
The Spider And Her Demons
YA Australian urban fantasy/horror
about a Malaysian-Chinese girl who’s half spider-demon, just trying to keep her head down and survive high school
when she accidentally kills and eats a man in front of the most popular girl at school, they strike up a strange friendship and she starts to learn more about herself and the supernatural world
aroacespec/sapphic ish
#The Spider And Her Demons#Sydney Khoo#loveozya#aroaessidhe 2023 reads#you give me a teenage girl with giant hair spider legs who scuttles across her bedroom wall on page 3#and then eats a man and i am already sold.#also aus books are always so familiar compared to US books :)#and yes sexuality stuff is ambiguous but basically: a bunch of discussion on relationship hierachies (ie friendship equally/more important)#themes of feeling unlovable bc you're different and different forms of love#multiple times the MC says she has no interest in dating or relationships and also is touch (and maybe sex) repulsed#- but of course that Also has to do with the whole Being A Monster thing#and it definitely shows some kind of attraction to dior - ie looking at her lips/bare skin; blushing; etc#and ends on sort of hand kiss / 'is this something??' vibes#I asked the author and they said they see them as QPR / platonic soulmates but are not at the point where they would know what to call it#which makes total sense to me!#the part of me who wants more obvious aroace YA wishes it was a little more specific#but also I DO love ambiguity and I think it wouldn't be true to the characters#who are clearly not even ready to start figuring that stuff out.#and also. aroacespec sapphics is like. also something i want#also like. I think it's reductive to assume just because 'looks at lips' is a common allo attraction trope....doesn't necessarily mean#it has to be that. yknow.#anyway. i loved it a lot.#gross spidergirl (affectionate)......#also dior is such an interesting and complex character. like another book could have made her nicer or less fucked up
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nothing ever excites me more than a spontaneous genshin, or more particularly, mondstadt discovery. i sat diluc upon the barbatos statue as a nice spot to go afk on without being interrupted by repetitive idle animations and voicelines (sorry diluc, this is nothing personal). my volume was turned up more than regularly by accident, and my in-game music was off despite how much i like the original game soundtrack. aNYHOW- i was about to go afk when i heard some strange noises that i didn't recall hearing in mondt before. it made me pause and turn my volume up even more. in the video above, it's kind of hard to discern the brief sounds over the noise of the wind up on the statue and in mondstadt in general, but when the wind dies down a little, you can distinctly hear voices of people, and what shocked me the most – neighs of horses. i have no clue whether it is just me discovering this only now, after 4 years of playing this godforsaken game and clearly not having paid enough attention to mondstadt's sfx before, but i still felt the need to share this terribly interesting tidbit in case there's other clueless mondstadt enthusiasts like me.
#what makes me so curious about these sfx is my inability to discern the meaning behind them#the sounds in the clip can only be heard during the night‚ which inserts various questions into my head#first and foremost‚ the sounds obviously confirm the existence of horses in mondstadt. the horses that AREN'T THERE in the current timeline#the horses that PHYSICALLY have no space for them within the city‚ but that's a problem of a different kind that i want to touch upon later#what makes their situation even more curious is that they're only heard during the night‚ with no trace of them during the day#so‚ my question is – surely they wouldn't add this specific sound if they didn't plan on introducing the horses in-game at some point?#even if there was no mentions of horses in genshin whatsoever‚ except in the manga which is set prior to the game's events#aka the timeline before the beginning or during the early stages of varka's expedition considering seamus's presence in mondstadt#and if that is so‚ is the peculiar activity of horses only at night a result of them being out of the city alongside the kof during the day#next curious thing to me are the voices and shouts‚ most likely in chinese‚ that i cannot discern and that i found nothing about online yet#however‚ in my opinion‚ the shouts seem too loud for the peaceful‚ post-stormterror crisis atmosphere of mondstadt#most of the words sound as if they're spoken through a megaphone‚ repeatedly‚ like call-outs to something or somebody#and not at all like shouts of people‚ regular citizens‚ from within their homes‚ or those of random drunkards on the streets at night#during daytime‚ the chatter is more coherent and distinctly chinese‚ words they clearly didn't bother translating to other voice-overs#another random and interesting sound is of something akin to a bell chiming‚ and i don't mean the big church bell tolling like in the clip#i am eager for feedback on this‚ for any sort of help or translation to sate my curiosity#and i'm also very much open to ideas or even random interpretations as i am overflowing with them‚ too#mondstadt#old mondstadt#genshin impact#genshin brainrot#genshin headcanon#genshin ost#genshin help#wilhelminaesque
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i do not care how they make it happen but aziraphale and crowley deserve tenderness in s3. Not necessarily another kiss but just… az putting his hand on crowley’s neck as they look at each other, crowley being allowed to run their fingers through the angel’s hair, sitting together on the sofa with crowley’s head in az’s lap, az calling crowley ‘darling’ or ‘my dear’, crowley bringing their angel flowers, they deserve the opportunity to show the other how much they love them
#rambling about the spouses again#but it’s like#you can see it so clearly#it’s on the screen right there#crowley looking like they practically have to hold themselves back from reaching out to touch their angel’s cheek#az literally struggles on where to put his hands during the kiss!!!!!!#all the endearment is already there#it’s all in the eyes#in the gestures#in the ‘you saved my books’ and there must be something i can do for you#in the way az looks put out to have to call crowley his friend when he is so much more than that#i am losing my mind#good omens#ineffable husbands#ineffable spouses#aziraphale#crowley#good omens s2#good omens s3
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They weren't lying, this psychological recovery journey got hands
#3rd month of taking antidepressants and knowing that There Is something majorly fucked up within me#i feel like im becoming normal bit by bit but also now my other problems become my aparent to me#i started to notice i have this childlike simplistic attitude towards wonder and relationships but also at the same time i understand the#severity of troubles around me on the level of burned out adult#but also it takes me from a week to several years to realize what people meant#and yet sometimes i get everything clearly#there are still ways to go#i still have to find a therapist#cuz psych diagnosed me with BPD; geberal anxiety disorder and ADHD and said i have autism signs that could explain the development of BPD#but all he can do is medical treatment which is not the kind you need for BPD and autism#im not saying you can treat autism but yeah he meant i need a psychotherapist for these instead of psychiatrist#i hope i can complete this mental health journey bcuz i feel like i finally got hit with all the weight of burnout i had all these years#i did some creative work in the august/early september but rn its all touching grass in real world and playing games#like i cook i help my family with chores i play fortnite i clean up my room i go out at 1am to look at the stars#all of my own volition without feeling like i need to push myself to do this#I'm scared that making art is not one of those things#i often have a thought that maybe art isnt really for me and in a perfect world i wouldnt do it#but then why am i so good at it#like...#petrotalk
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Everyone tag yourself as a line from this iconic comment I just got on one of my fics, I'm "the failure is gay now".
#froze fics#for the record i am genuinely touched by and grateful for this#especially since it must have taken a lot of effort for them to write it out in english#and evidently the story moved them and they clearly get it#but my mind is blown#how can 'keep copy of this close to me so I can be loved by the chance to change and heal when I have not done enough'#coexist with 'cloud is wearing slut'#through my writing apparently#my face hurts and my stomach hurts#and i'm so touched#dj crazy times reads fanfic now#dear lord#how do i respond to this???#how can anyone hope to match this energy?
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[in the middle of the rink-oh-mania fight]
mike: [clearly frustrated] well, i don't know! maybe you should've reached out more! why is this on me? why am i the bad guy?
will: [clearly in distress and looking sad]
mike: [immediately activating his will's voice] look 🥺 let's just 🥺 find el, okay? 🥺 [stares a second too long to check will is okay and then turns around]
#you can't make this shit up#like they are both angry at each other here and are calling the other out for it#but the moment mike's words touch a nerve and will is left speechless and looking torn and sad mike is ready to put a stop to the fight#and redirect them to the more pressing matters which is finding el#imma say it here and i will say it again if i have to#byler's miscommunication issues between seasons were both sided and they are both guilty and i LOVE they called each other out on this one#anyhow#yeah i am clearly rewatching season four and so you'll see a bunch of posts about this season here#sooooo#there's that#byler tumblr#byler#mike wheeler#stranger things#will byers#mike x will
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genuinely convinced that this house is sucking the life out of me in order to power the christmas decorations
#🍉.misha#as funny as that is objectively I am psychotic (literally) and i was already hallucinating all night so#maybe it's just psychosis#but also my hair is falling out and feels gummy and stretchy as if it's just been bleached#(bleach hasn't touched it since the summer)#my teeth are rotting and my body feels ill and my mind is clearly going#I need to get out of here as soon as humanly possible
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disorganized honest thoughts on angeal and genesis
Read someone's view on crisis core as "a strange game where I only remembered charas from ff7 proper". And I thought to myself. that is an accurate review.
really long ramble-y thoughts from a person who has not kept up with ff7 past crisis core under cut you have been warned
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I have learned to like both of them quite a bit after rolling them around in my head for several years, but on first playthrough I did not like angeal or genesis. and I don't think back in a "what a fool I was" way. I think my original view on the two is actually still valid. I think angeal and genesis are both pretty badly written and have very little substance in game.
I understand the limitations of the psp greatly restricted the amount of story they could cram in. but then you write a different story or change your game system. This is not a valid excuse.
My understanding of how they WANTED to position the characters is Angeal, zacks' heroic ideal, a bar for him to gauge whether he's made it or not. While sephiroth was genesis'?????
because angeal barely spends any time NOT in the opposition, or even coming UP in conversation I really can't tell.
Genesis was positioned to b a foil to zacks. which still rings true in crisis core, but not straight forward enough???
Both Genesis and zacks were fixated on being a hero. I could see it being a clash of ideals. "what is a true hero" type thing. but in that case genesis being a peer of both angeal and sephiroth makes the connection muddy.
This is just a completely biased counter suggestion to the story we got but:
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I feel like we could have gotten more bang for our buck if genesis was actually a peer of zacks, maybe even excelling where zacks was not, but feels threatened by the growth zacks is showing empowered by his sunshine puppy attitude. Both look up to sephiroth.
genesis continues to idolize sephiroth even when sephiroth proves to be not as perfect as advertised, while zacks has his qualms. it's about becoming a hero for zacks while it's about becoming sephiroth for genesis.
Later there is some drama surrounding who gets promoted to class 1st ( only zacks / only genesis / both but genesis causes some trouble and has to leave etc etc)
zacks and genesis eventually have to duke it out one heroic ideal to another. zacks wins -- we still get basically the same conclusion we got at banora in crisis core proper.
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You might have noticed this suggestion is Angeal-less. While Angeal is probs one of my fav of the charas introduced in crisis core he did not need to be there methinks. (save on disc space, leave him on the drawing board) HOWEVER In my haphazard suggestion above, maybe it could have been that zacks idolized angeal while genesis idolized sephiroth -- the two class 1sts. But for whatever reason angeal has an "accident", that way sephiroth can still have his "oh no all my friends are gone" dilemma. and a good reason to start going down a dark path.
Meanwhile Genesis had more of a reason to be there -- it's 2007 and GACKT is RIGHT THERE jk jk -- Zacks needed his own foil. that said this "Angeal maybe didn't need to be there" opinion is a bit colored by how square has handled zacks throughout the years. Positioning sephiroth as his heroic ideal over angeal. However even in game they didn't really paint a clear picture of how Angeal was zacks' mentor.
Everyone knew the PSP has limited resources throwing new characters at the problem was kinda a bad solution.
I say this having actually loved playing the game, and knowing full well if they actually did something like what I wrote above I might have enjoyed it less. who knows, nagging about a story that's already written is something nerds(me) do to fill the void in their hearts.
anyhoo have nowhere to put my thoughts so putting them here.
#feels#if not abundantly obvious I like both of these chars btw#normally i'd draw stuff for this#feels like cheating#but also like I am not communicating clearly#just dumping it out in word form lol#anyhoo#this is just random thoughts#wait actually this is getting embarrassing#what am I doing#might delete#crisis core#zacks fair#I didn't really touch on this in my suggestion#but we could have left genes!s on the drawing board too#like strengthen the story of the pre-existing charas#rather than make a bunch of new charas to not flesh out#you know?#I don't know#to be clear I’ve played reunion too#just meant story wise I dunno anything past ff7 ffac and crisis core
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Archmage Vishalny, Arcane Diplomat and Master of Enchantment (DND NPC)
#5, Vampire and blood/gore stimboard
Themes of blood on the hands, gore/hearts, corsets and spooky fashion, spraying calligraphy, fangs (smiling). A vampire stim board, touching the feelings of satisfaction of blood finally being presented. Expressive conflicting emotions, dark and spooky fashion.
xxx.xxx.xxx
#the blood is finaly on the hands; faces are finally shown now with the fangs out; here all is revealed#first off; the beating heart gif is so cool; v fun to watch. i wanted something closer to real violence that was clearly not actually real#the middle row is more spooky fashion. a tightening of a corset (important (secret)); and a more spooky goth gold look. very vamp#i am SO happy with the calligraphy gifs in the top right and bottom left.#the pair of them showing intense contradictory emotions; the same art of writing from earlier now messy and mote violent from the spray#the top and bottom middle are fang based. let me tell you it was so fucking hard to find fang gifs that was not a white person. i found 1.#i love the top gif though; the big smile and flashing of fangs; friendly yet a little too happy for the implications of what happens next#the bottom gif is so fucking visceral oml. the blood flowing out of the lip like that is so fucking sexy.so it stays despite the paleness#the top left and bottom right are really visceral and lovely. like i can imagine the texture of the blood on these hands and its v cool#also; now the blood can finaly touch the hands; mote intimate; more true. more danming.#i love this board. really fucking good#ok gonna tag now#vishalny#stimboard#stim#original#original post#blood#gore#eye contact#fangs#red#black#gif
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i can never complain abt people spending lots of money on fashion bc if i had the chance to buy something from orttu i would take it in a second. but also if they're regular sweatpants $400 is stupid
#also obv the bigger issue w that post is the people out of touch w how expensive things r not that they're spending the money in general#tho i will say. orttu is clearly designer but if their quality is good i would believe their prices r semi-close to the cost of production#like obv they r inflated bc that's how selling things works esp w designer brands but they're not So overpriced that it's fucked up#i just. could never afford something from them until i am settled w an income for some years#also i need top surgery to rock half their stuff :( but someday soon#ted talks
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