#i am beyond pissed right now with all this shit cropping up

[a-thousand-lives-lost-for-peace]

I don't usually post stuff like this, but after seeing the new Sora-AI they unveiled earlier - I am not a fan.

There is so much that could go wrong with shit like that, especially as it gets 'better.' Legal ramifications, faked videos, etc.

Not even mentioning the careers, handmade animations, handmade art, all that shit that this is influencing even by proxy. Speaking as someone who intends to have a career in a creative field, such as VFX work, this is scary stuff.

I don't support this in any way, and neither will I support any other AI.

[scenetocause]

This isn't a kiss prompt but I didn't know who else to send it to. Given you're into fisting would you ever write urethral play? Rule 63 pretty please and ignore this if it's not your thing!!!! Thank you for your service 💋

anon i need you to know this is the most horrifically targeted ask in history and i am found out. called out. seen. it's taken me days to respond because i'm having conniptions. let's all never meet at the satanic ritual again if you sent this no you didn't if you read this no you didn't i absolutely definitely didn't write it.

this seemed to fit very perfectly to pussy exploring champion genders maxy. warnings for what this is and inevitably a bit of piss.

Luisa says no straight away, tells Lando to watch more normal porn. He looks suitably ashamed of himself but also directly at Max, who hasn't replied yet.

"Err," she's not. Well she's seen it, obviously, back in the Formula Renault days when everyone was trying to one-up each other about what they'd whacked one out to. But she doesn't think about that type of thing too often, now. Doesn't exactly need to.

"You are not," Luisa looks scandalised. "No way."

"I dunno," Max argues. "It's - well. It's interesting, maybe?"

Luisa makes a very disgusted sound, like she's about to call them both idiot boys but doesn't want to offend Max. "Not when I'm here. Could you get back to-" she gestures between her own legs - "now, please?"

It's something Max is beyond happy to do, especially when Lando slides up behind where she's bent over, sticks his dick in Max's pussy while her tongue's up Luisa's, fitting perfectly between them.

It's a few weeks later when the opportunity presents itself. Luisa's away, Lando's received a few suspiciously plain parcels, Max is feeling restless and horny but doesn't want to give him the satisfaction of riding his dick for a second time in a day. Bloke wins one race and thinks he's got free use or something.

Max might let him. One day. For a weekend or something. If he wins a championship. For now, though, she's curious about this.

When Lando pushes her back into the duvet, one of his hands behind her waist to maneuver her so she's settled nicely against the pillows, it feels like the right time to ask. To shimmy her legs around his, so she can hook her ankles behind his thighs and hold him there, just in case actually saying it makes either of them nervous.

In the end she can't quite get it out, anyway. "Do you want to try - putting something up. You know?"

"Fuck." Lando clearly wasn't expecting her to ask that, has to collapse on her a bit. "Fuck, really? Yeah - yeah, if you want to."

"If it's shit we can do something else, yeah?" Everything on PornHub was a bit rancid, Max is pretty sure she's not going to be doing any of that. But it's nice when Lando tongues her there, sometimes. Weirdly soothing, if her cunt's a bit achey from fucking.

Lando moans into her collarbone, kisses her under the ear before a breathy confession. "I'm glad it's you - I knew she wouldn't really be, y'know."

There's a thing, with them. That they do stuff together, sometimes and it's different from with Luisa. When they're all fucking it's great, so good but sometimes Max and Lando almost try stuff on, before they take it to her. Just to get the knack first, really.

"Better get, y'know. And a towel." Kicking him off the bed to go and find everything feels a bit mean but also fuck is Max going to do it herself. It gives her time to kick off her own shorts, leave her in a soft, comfy crop top Lando can see her nipples through, anyway.

When he gets back he drops some stuff on the bed, kneels back to take his own shirt off. It's a nice view, lot of abs and shoulders and Lando's tight, dark nipples. He's so built now and Max can't really bring herself to get jealous about it, with her own body to explore, these days.

Lando wastes no time in pushing her thighs apart, big hands spanning them. His thumbs are massaging the crease, spreading the outer lips of her pussy immediately and she can feel where she's wet with anticipation, the slide easy.

"Towel." She can't be bothered to do laundry after this, is pretty sure she'll want Lando to hold her.

He shakes his head like he's trying to snap himself out of something. "Right, yeah."

Lando picks one of her thighs up, props it on his own hip while he's dipping his fingers beneath her hips, rubbing them over Max's arsehole. "I'm gonna start here."

"Well it's not there." Surely he knows that?

"Nope." Lando looks smug and ashamed at the same time. "I wanna fuck you here."

It punches the air out of her, sometimes. The way Lando wants her, wants Max. He's got a bit of a thing for anal anyway but because they did this before, when Max was a boy, it always feels natural with them.

"Ok, yeah."

It's so nice, wet fingers playing over her and dipping inside, she almost forgets they're not just doing that this afternoon. Feeling stretched around Lando's fingers isn't as good as his cock but it gets her in a relaxing kind of mood, concentrating on making the tension leave her body, letting the anticipation build.

"Your arse is so good." It's a bit embarrassing how basic compliments still get her - of course her arse is great, Lando's lucky he gets to do it but appreciation is always nice.

"C'mon," she wants her clit touched, feeling wet and swollen.

Lando doesn't do that, although he takes his fingers out of her arse, carefully wipes them on the towel underneath her, then frowns and gets up to go and wash them in the sink.

For a minute, she thinks maybe it was messy and wants to die a bit, making a questioning noise when he gets back.

"No - just. Should be sterile, innit?" Oh, yeah. Max doesn't really want to be pissing blood any time soon. It's nice, that Lando cares this much about her. Makes it easy to part her legs, wide and prop them a bit like an uncomfortable doctors appointment, much easier with Lando's thumb rubbing over her clit.

He wriggles down on his belly, disappearing from her view and Max closes her eyes, tries not to think too much about the view he's got. Her arse, glistening with lube and still twitching a bit from the intrusion. Her pussy, puffed up with how turned on she is and sopping wet where he's spreading her open, looking inside.

It makes her gasp, when she feels that he can see it, from the sudden air. It almost makes her want to pee but then Lando's mouth is there, wet and as soothing as she remembered it.

The catch of the tip of his tongue over it makes Max blush. It feels very possible, suddenly, that something could go up there. When Lando sucks on it a bit, gentle and warm, she wants to relax it, pee in his mouth just a tiny bit and it's a weird, mortifying thought that drags a harsh noise out of her, shocked at herself.

The exhale makes her let go, just a tiny bit and then nearly try to scramble off the bed, if Lando hadn't been there to hold her down with his hands round her hips.

He looks at her, aggrieved and with a wet face. "You know I am trying to make you do that?"

"Oh." She'd sort of known - you can't get round piss being a bit involved, can you? But not in his mouth, maybe. Should've know Lando's a fucking freak.

"Relax, Maxy." She settles back and he dives back in, licking her all over for a few minutes before getting back to sucking over her peehole, soft and warm.

This time it's more deliberate, when she relaxes. It's not a lot, not even a dribble, really, just a few drops from her opening up for him.

Lando grunts in satisfaction, stops sucking to lick over her, dipping his tongue further into her pussy. It feels a bit urgent, suddenly, to get attention there or to piss properly.

"C'mon, do the thing."

"Yeah?" Lando sounds a bit gargly, like he is on team radio sometimes. "Can I put it in you?"

He sounds so hopeful Max forces herself to stay relaxed, not tense up with anticipation. "You can try. Y'know, with lube."

The sound Lando's got in his hand isn't big - probably the smallest he could order, with a safely rounded tip. Max is pretty sure that's her limit, isn't interested in anything that would stretch her out there, just something that will fit.

Lando sloshes so much lube it feels like her pussy is squelching and it takes him a moment to get a good enough grip to open her back up, with the forefinger and thumb of his left hand, while he's aiming.

Trying to relax, feeling the round tip of the sound against her, she feels the hot splash of some piss escape her and Lando uses all those F1 reaction times to push it forward, just inside.

It's. So weird. Nothing like her arse or her pussy, almost feels like she can feel it in her clit. Makes her wriggle down, get her legs further apart and-

"More." She sounds hoarse, embarrassed and Lando just hums like he's mesmerised, fucks the sound a little deeper.

She feels the moment when it's in, partly as relief that the ball part is past and only the smooth, silicone stick is being squeezed and partly as a rush of heat between her legs, leaking.

It must make her make a noise, although Max isn't sure she could've heard herself over the blood rushing through her ears. Still, Lando responds. "It's so hot. Fuck, Max, does it hurt?"

Sort of, would be her honest answer. It's not comfortable, at the same time as it feels incredible. Filthy, special, like she's going to come insanely hard as soon as Lando does anything else to her.

"Not really. Not, like, bad. I like it." It feels shocking admitting that, almost the same gut-punch as when she'd had to say the opposite about racing.

Lando tuts. "I'm going to-" he tugs on the sound, gentle. "Take it out. Want to get you off."

She doesn't have the words to say that'll probably do it. That she might come when he's pulling it slowly out. By some miracle, she doesn't because Lando's mouth is back there, suddenly. His right thumb, freed from holding the sound, is on her clit and she's definitely wetting, a little bit, when her thighs clamp around his head while she's shaking through it.

When she lets him go Lando drags himself up like he's just done a brutal workout. His face is red with heat or horny or both and his mouth is dripping, goatee soaked.

"Fuck, I'm not gonna be able to-" he's shoving his joggers off, cock springing free with a spider-web trail of precome to the fabric. "I'm - fuck, Max."

He's coming over her pussy, splattering her pubes, before he's even really got a hand on himself, fingertips loosely rubbing himself through it.

Lando moans, collapsing on the bed next to her. "I know we've got to - give me a minute."

She rolls over, pulls his face against her tits. "Thank you, buddy."

Lando makes a sort of affectionate noise, burrowing into her chest. "Can't believe - yeah, good. So good, actually."

He runs her a bath, when she gets up to pee. Sits behind her in it until they're both pruning and the water's getting cool, their bodies warmer than what's around them, pressed together.

[sunshinetemptress93]

Welcome to Just This Once: when Harry and Jade reconnect after spending four years and thousands of miles apart on the most special night of their best friends lives.

There is smut of course.

Hope you enjoy!💋

—————————

Thursday June 2nd

I swear to god, if this cab driver gets turned around one more time I'm going to lose my shit. He's been driving in circles for over an hour, completely lost and getting more and more frustrated. I didn't want to be even more late to this gathering than I already am. I called Tatiana and Niall letting them know my driver was a complete dipshit and I'd be there as soon as possible.

The car turns sharply into a parking lot and comes to a halt. Huffing out of my nose, I pipe up. "Um sir. Do you need me to pull up a map?"

"No, no I've got it." I waves me off and reverses the vehicle, turning left back down the way we came. I sigh heavily, and his eyes glance at me in the mirror, so I shrink down in my seat.

I could've walked from the airport and gotten to the resort faster.

After about 15 minutes, the car pulls down a winding dirt drive. The old oak trees creek as a wind gust whips through the area, the mix of freshly fallen rain and salty air hits me and I grin staring out the open window. Tatiana picked the best venue for a weekend away to celebrate her and Niall's big day: an all expenses paid resort with room and board for all of their guests. It was an exciting day, but nerve racking as well. The closer we got to the hotel, the more nervous I became to see him. "We're here. So sorry for the delay! I haven't driven over here much."

Passing him some money for the fair, I shake my head. "Don't sweat it. Thank you!" Of course I was beyond pissed I was an hour late, but I don't have it in me to take it out on him. I'm a bit of a passive person when it comes to confrontation, and quite honestly I didn't have the energy. The trip was long and I was not about to use up the last bit of energy I had on being upset, but in being the best maid of honor for my best friend.

Grabbing my suitcase from the trunk, the driver gives me a nod and sets it down on the cobblestone driveway. I wave politely as he pulls away, still trying to stall some. I turn and make my way up the brick stairs to the front door, heart racing and palms sweating. I knew that I'd see him, especially since he's the best man, but now that this day is here, I was beginning to panic.

But no matter how this reunion goes, I was going to make sure I enjoyed every minute of this trip. I never take time for myself, let alone take an actual vacation. Working as much as I do is how I was even able to afford this trip, so it was going to be amazing regardless.

I bet it'll be fine, right? We don't hate each other, and I mean we're Facebook friends, so maybe I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill.

Following signs that the one and only Tatiana hand made for this weekend, I end up back outside underneath a cabana adjacent to a massive pool.

"Jade!" Her voice sings through the chatter of about 50 people clustered around with drinks in their hands. Dropping the handle of my suit case, I race over to her, colliding into a heart wrenching hug. I could tell that she'd already started crying, which brings my own tears to my eyes. It's been so long since I'd seen Tatiana, a year to be exact. Ever since I'd moved to Northern California for a teaching job, it's been damn near impossible to make time to fly back out east to see her. She opted out of a bachelorette party to save money, understanding 100% that not everyone has the time or finances to disappear for a weekend getting shit faced.

Pulling back, fresh tears in her eyes, she kisses my cheek. "I'm so glad you made it in one piece!"

Taking her in, she looked absolutely breathtaking. She really went all out with the whole bridal vibe, dressed in the most adorable white feather crop top and high waisted trousers to match. I on the other hand had on a camel colored blazer, black body suit, and fucking jeans. "I'm so sorry I'm so late, the driver got lost and I'm fresh off a plane looking like a complete slob."

"Jade, stop it. You look amazing, don't even worry!" Linking her arm with my own, she walks me over to a group of people drinking and talking. I can see Niall cackling at something someone said, eyes crinkled so much you couldn't even see his gorgeous blue eyes. As we approach them, that all too familiar lock of curls comes into view. It's a bit longer now on the sides, and his shoulders looked broader. His shirt was quite colorful, covered in what looks to be food and condiments. Good to see he's still just as silly as ever.

He wasn't the same lanky 23 year old boy anymore, but a full grown man. My heart races the closer we get, so I chew on the inside of my cheek to calm my nerves. "Ni! Look who I finally found!" He turns, forest green locking with gray blue, and visibly stops breathing. I do my best not to stare and look past him, waving at Niall. "Hi loser."

"Jade! Finally!" Niall pushes past Harry and wraps me in a bear hug. "Thought you got murdered."

"Nope, just super lost." Niall pats the top of my head playfully. "Did you give the guy shite directions?"

"Hey!" I scoff. "I offered to help him, but he insisted he had it figured out." Shifting my eyes over, Harry's already fiddling with his rings.

"Well I'm glad you're here, wanna drink?" He asks.

"Mhm. Vodka cranberry?"

"Typical." Niall teases. "Babe, come with me and help." I go to protest, not wanting to be left alone with my ex so early on into this weekend, but Tatiana jumped at the chance. "Yeah! Uh I gotta go say hi to Grammy anyways." Tatiana takes Niall's hand and disappears into the crowd. Exhaling, I decide to go ahead and get this over with and center my body to face Harry for the first time in over four years apart.

"Hey there." He croaks. Harry's gaze does a once over of me, and the tiniest smile twitches at the corner of his lips.

"Hi there." His eyes meet mine again and he takes a step forward. "So do I get a hug or are we going to pretend we hate each other."

The stifled giggle comes out full fledged. "of course you idiot, come here." Wrapped in his embrace, he squeezes me tight. My heart stopped pounding the moment I pressed into his chest.

Harry and I may be exes, but we didn't end on bad terms. We just... wanted different things. He wanted to be married young and pop out a few kids, whereas I wanted adventure and no other responsibilities other than myself. We'd decided after college with him moving back to England to work in finance and I moving to California to teach, we parted ways. It was difficult, but we knew it was best. We were young and needed to figure out life on our own, and trying to force one to conform to what the other wanted would have broken us.

I'll always have love for him and I'd hoped he'd done well for himself over the last four years.

"So," I cleared my throat. "How have you been?"

"Good, good. Great actually." He answers quickly. His voice wavered, indicating he wasn't being truthful. Clearly things weren't good, good great and in typical Harry fashion he masks the truth with a broad dismissive answer.

I arch my brow at him, "Harry," he chews his lip nervously . "What."

I step closer, looking dead in his eyes. "You know I still know all your tells." He stares at me for a beat until his facade finally fades. Groaning, he throws his head back. "God dammit I forgot you can do that."

"Tell me, truthfully, how are you?"

Pushing his hands in his pockets, he sighs. "Well, I moved back about 6 months-"

"Oi! Styles move!" Niall's boisterous voice interrupts our conversation as he reaches around Harry's frame to hand me my vodka cranberry. "There ya go, love!"

Harry shoots daggers at his best friend, but Niall misses it completely. "Follow me, dinners being served." The two of us follow Niall to be seated by waiters dressed in all black suits at a long table overlooking the sunset over the ocean. Centerpieces filled with peonies, roses, gardenias and cosmos decorate the table top. Little tea candles placed in vases filled halfway with water illuminate everything in a soft glow, setting the perfect ambiance of romance and whimsy. Everything was so over the top and glamorous, very much a reflection of Tatiana's character.

To my surprise, I wasn't seated next to Harry. Tatiana always gave me shit for being nervous to see him again and swore up and down she'd have us seated next to one another the whole weekend and yet, I'm sat four seats down from him and on the opposite side.

Maybe she finally came to her senses that this was going to be a very strange weekend for the both of us.

Seeing him now though, all sense of insecurity and angst disappeared. He was my person for so long and breaking up really did do a number on me, but there was zero tension between us right now. Glances were exchanged throughout the meal, and each time the looks lasted longer than the one prior. We ate, we laughed, and told embarrassing stories of our two wonderful friends, it was a perfect night.

Once we'd finished eating, everyone began to disperse and retire to their prospective rooms. Before heading back inside, I catch Niall before he gets too far from me. Tapping his shoulder, he turns quickly. "Hey doll face."

"Hey, um." I looked around hoping no one was within earshot. "Is Harry ok? He said something about moving back?"

Niall's shoulders slump a tad. "Um yeah, he's been staying with us while he saves up for his own place."

My brows pinch, "did something happen?"

Niall stays silent, looking anywhere but my face.

"Did something happen in England?" I press.

"Let him tell you." Shutting down the conversation with that, I concede. "Okay, sorry. Just, he clammed up a bit earlier." I glance over my shoulder and see Harry seated with a few guys from college underneath a tree, laughing and hollering at one another.

"Look, I can tell you this. He's had a rough go, but he's doin' better. Just a delicate topic that's all. Let him come to you, yeah?"

"Ok. I will. See you tomorrow." I hug my dear friend and meander up the steps, glancing back once more and see Harry already watching me. I give him a wave with my fingers, and mouth goodnight and he does the same. The halls were empty and my room was immaculate. With a view of the garden below from the balcony, I couldn't wait to wake up with a cup of coffee and enjoy the sunrise. Trying not to dwell too much, I shower and get ready for bed with a face mask and a poetry book. I wasn't sure how I was going to get Harry to tell me what happened while he was gone, but I just hope he's doing alright.

*****

Friday, June 3rd

With the sun high in the sky, I made myself comfortable on my hot pink beach towel laid out next to Tatiana's white one. Adorned in a wide brimmed straw hat with wifey stitched into it, Tatiana sprays tanning oil onto her already bronze skin. "Don't over do it, Tati. Don't wanna look like a lobster tomorrow for your big day."

Tatiana flips me off and closes the cap. "I'm fine, there's an umbrella."

Laid on my tummy and adjusting the baby blue string bikini top to cover me properly, I flip through my book and roll my eyes at her. "Yeah, for now. But in a few hours when you're three margaritas in, you'll end up out in the water burnt to a crisp."

A flip flop comes flying at me, hitting me in the butt. Rolling over, I see Tatiana leaning back on her hands smirking at me. "Talk shit again and the next one will be aimed at your face." I flick sand at her causing her to shriek. "You know I'm right." I deadpan.

"Fuck off, i know." She utters.

Turning my attention back to my book, I immerse myself into the world of rupi kaur. But it doesn't last long. The men were playing sand volleyball right in front of us so that means it took no time at all for the ball to land right in front of me, sending sand flying into my face. Slamming my book shut, I sit up agitated. Before I can chastise whatever idiot let it get this far from the net, Harry stands before me golden brown and panting. "Sorry, Niall's a fucking idiot who got too drunk before hand." Harry squats down in front of me, bright yellow trunks pulling up over his thighs. My eyes hoan in on his tiger tattoo and my mouth begins to water.

Thankfully I have massive black sunglasses on, so he can't see me salivating over the ink on his skin.

"It's fine." I utter. "I'll sit back to avoid getting hit."

Harry grabs the ball shaking his head, "nah, stay comfortable. I'll make sure to block it next time." With a wink, Harry jogs back towards the rowdy group of boys hooping and hollering, wanting to continue the game.

I couldn't help but watch him the entire time, poetry book long forgotten now. His physique has changed quite a bit since we were together, and I gotta say I'm impressed. He'd spike the ball for a point, dive for a save, or jump serve with every ounce of strength he had, and every muscle contracted and rippled with each move. He just gets sexier with time. It didn't go unnoticed that his attention was half in the game and half on me while I sunbathed. His lips would roll into his mouth when he glanced over at me, especially when I needed to re-apply sunscreen.

Not that I needed to do it as often as I was, but this was a fun little game we were playing. Where's the harm in that, right?

He was doin' something to me too with the way his shorts stayed perfectly hiked up over his tattoo. Fuck head knows how much I loved that one, second to his butterfly on his abdomen. I'd kill to run my hands over it again, and with his newly formed six back it'd feel even-

"Earth to Jaaaade." Tati's voice snaps me out of my daze, "hey stop drooling over your ex and get in the water with me!"

"I wasn't drooling." I lie.

"Yeah, and I'm the queen of England."

"Isn't she dead?" I quip.

"Probably." She tuts. "You know he's single again." Gesturing her chin to Harry, I follow her line of sight to see Harry stretching his arms over his head, exposing his fern tattoos... god I hate him right now.

I sit up and cross my legs, turning to my friend. "Again?"

"Oh yeah." She confirms. "He had some girl back in England he was with for about two years. They got serious super fast, proposed and everything. Then, it all went to shit." Tatiana fans herself with her hat, and continues. "She ran off with some yoga instructor from France. Called off the whole thing."

"Wow, that's fucked." I look back at Harry who's now wrestling with another guy for the ball. He looked like he was living his best life you'd never know he was probably still hurting inside. "Niall said he's staying with you guys."

"Mhm. But he's looking to buy a place in Boston to stay close to us. He really needed his friends." She proclaimed. "Ya know with you coming home, too, he could really use someone to talk to."

My heart drops. "Tati, no one knows about that but you." I scold. "Don't even think about telling-"

"Hey hey!" She raises her hands in defense. "And that's still the case. But if you wanted to tell someone... You've got the prime opportunity here. Now, I'm sweating like a whore in church and need to cool off. Are you coming?"

I place my book in my bag and brush off any excess sand from my body as I stand. "Yeah, yeah ok. I'm coming."

Taking my hand, Tatiana and I race towards the crashing waves, kicking up water with every step. Diving into a wave, I emerge feeling refreshed. The beach has always been my happy place, Tatiana's too. Ever since we were kids we spent as many hours out in the water as possible until our parents had to bribe us with ice cream to get us out.

Like a magnetic force, I feel eyes on me. Turning around facing the shore once more, there stood Harry mid game gawking at me. His tongue darts over his bottom lip until the ball slams right into his chest. Snapping him out of his daydream, he diverts his attention from me to the drunken angry men. "Oi!!! Winning point!" Profanities from his team could be heard over the crash of the waves around me.

"Looks like you just lost the game for him, missy." Tatiana teases.

Well worth it.

*****

Saturday June 4th

I'd never been one for weddings. But the entire day devoted to my longest friend and her adorable husband made me realize they were something truly special. Having divorced parents who despised one another made me very anti marriage, but Niall and Tatiana exude pure unconditional love, and the fact that they chose to share that love with us made my heart burst with joy. Watching my best friend make her way down the aisle brought tears to my eyes and I'm not too much of a crier.

She looked radiant.

With a strapless lace dress hugging her body, her golden skin shimmered in the setting sunlight.

Niall was a complete mess which I know none of us will ever let him live down. Watching Harry try and not laugh out loud while his best friend is sobbing was probably the highlight of the ceremony. The officiant spoke of everlasting love and thanked us for joining to witness the union of two people who loved each other so much that "they decided to get the government involved."

That got a good laugh outta everyone.

Tati proceeds with her vows, but I can't focus on anything other than Harry's deep green eyes watching my every move. The majority of the ceremony was spent shooting each other looks and smiles, winks and giggles. I was so worried about things being weird or hard this weekend, and they've been quite the opposite. It was easy to fall into a rhythm with him again. Very friendly, light and easy. After the beach, the wedding party went bowling together, then somehow ended up at a karaoke bar. The longer the night went on, the easier it was to be near him. Almost too easy.

Wrapping up the ceremony, Niall takes Tatiana into his arms and dips her into the sweetest giggle filled kiss.

"Please welcome for the first time, Mr. And Mrs. Niall and Tatiana Horan!"

Lavender seeds go flying from the crowd as the happy couple makes their way back down the aisle. Cheers, tears, and laughter erupt as we follow suit, the rest of the wedding party walk back down the aisle, and of course Harry and I are the first to go. We lead the way, arms linked, and I swear electricity shoots through me. His arm felt firm holding my own as I try and walk in my heels down the grassy path towards the reception hall. Harry glances down at me, smiling. "I wanted to tell you that you look absolutely stunning."

"Thank you, you clean up well."

"I do alright." Making our way to the bar, Harry orders himself a whiskey neat and me a vodka cranberry.

"So tell me, how's life." He asks leading me to the assigned tables. Glancing down I see his name card placed conveniently next to mine. I guess I'll let Tatiana get a kick outta this one thing.

Pulling out my chair, I take a seat. "Well I've been teaching fifth grade math in California. I really liked it. Worked for a good school district, great time off, the works." Sipping my drink, I knew I'd need liquid courage. "But..."

Leaning forward, Harry listens intently. "But?"

"Umm, my moms not well. So I'd decided to come back east to take care of her." Harry's hand gently holds mine, squeezing it slightly. "Jade, m'so sorry." Soft green glimmered a little less at the news. "It's ok, she's doing ok. But there will come a time she won't, so I decided to come back." The words struggle to come out, but Tatiana was right. I needed to be more open about what's going on in my life. I can find a teaching job anywhere, but I'd never get back any lost time with my mom.

Harry's lashes fluttered at my words, and he exhales. "For how long?"

Rubbing my thumb across his knuckles, I couldn't help but grin. "For good, my friend." Leaning back he toys with his half empty glass. "Friends, huh?" His jaw tightened as he watches me shift in my seat. "Yeah, friends." I confirm. "We always got along, so I think friends is what we are."

Darting his eyes across the room, he chuckles. "Mhm. If I recall, we were very good together."

I smack his knee, "Get your mind outta the gutter, Styles."

"But that's it's favorite place to be, especially when it comes to you, peach."

Chills cover my skin and my breath catches in my throat. His pet name for me slips from his lips like it was just part of his vocabulary. Like he said it every day. Eyes wide and not sure how to respond, I sip on my drink and turn away from him. "Did I unlock a memory?" He quips. Crossing my leg over the other, I ignore him.

We've been toying with one another all weekend, but now we're about to cross over that line that we may not want to cross.

He leans over and whispers in my ear, "doin' ok there? Do I still make you nervous?"

Rolling my lips into my mouth I squint at him. "What do you think? Like you said, we were always good together. In more ways than one."

One single finger grazes my bare knee, making me twitch. "Glad to know I still got it." He teases. His hand finds home on top of my knee, so I take another long sip. The lights dim while people mingle and dance, leaving the two of us alone at the table.

Bad idea.

I take another gulp when his hand travels up my leg further. My skin felt like it was on fire the higher his fingers danced along my skin. He watches my micro reactions to his touch as it traveled underneath my dress. He massaged the fleshy part of my thigh, making me feel like I was going to bust. I did my best to keep my composure, but when his middle finger grazed the front of my underwear, I audibly sigh. the room is dark enough and the tablecloth long enough that no one can tell what's going on underneath it. Steady circles are drawn around my bud, and I shoot him a look.

"Harry."

"Jade."

He didn't even look my way. Just slowed his pace, but continued once I looked away, adding pressure this time. I glance down and realize my drink is now empty and I was definitely going to need more alcohol if this is going to continue.

I gasp when his thumb slides behind the thin material, finally touching me properly. My eyes flutter shut, and I turn my face away to avoid making eye contact with any passerby in the room who has no clue what's happening. The lights now fully dimmed to darkness  aside from the spotlight on a set of double doors.

"Welcome for the first time! The Horans!" The room erupts into cheers and Harry's hand returns to its rightful place, clapping and cheering. Brushing off the newly found flustered feeling, I join in and stand, clapping and tearing up as the two most incredible people enter. The room dies down when their first dance song begins to play and I can't help but tear my eyes away from them and look at the crazy man sitting next to me. Harry shoots me a wink and slides his pointer finger past his lips, shaking me to the core. The action stole any words I had left in me.

Harry pops it out of his mouth and grins. "Mmm, still so sweet."

That was it for me.

I grip his suit jacket and pull him away towards the back door that backs up to the main part of the hotel.

He begins to slow his steps, causing my dramatic exit to halt. Coming to a complete stop, I turn and stare him down. "Harry, you're gonna get us in trouble." I tried to sound stern, but it's kinda hard when he got me all worked up. He steps up to me, tilting my chin with his knuckle. "Thought you liked it."

"I did. That's the problem." I stand firm.

"Didn't really seem like it was one five minutes ago. Come on, peach. You know I can take care of that little problem of yours." His voice was husky and low, only loud enough for me to hear him. I know jumping into bed with him right now is not the smartest idea, but I was aching and he could easily fix that for me, especially since it was his fault.

"Just this once?" I offer.

"Mhm."

Crashing my lips into his, Harry's hands cup my jaw. The kiss was rushed and needy, and exactly as I remembered him. It was a teeth clashing, heaving panting encounter that made my head spin. Pulling apart, we stare intensely at one another, silently contemplating what the fuck we are doing. "Jade. I...."

I let out a shaky breath as I bring my lips to his once more. "Just this once." I whisper.

"Fuck it." He groans.

We race into the hotel, scramble to get the elevator button while devouring one another, and stumble into an elderly couple exiting the doors. We apologize profusely until the metal doors shut and allow us to pick up where we left off.

Thankfully the elevator ride was short, and the hall was empty when we stepped off it. I refuse to let any obstacles interrupt us, and we'd have to make it quick before Tatiana notices we aren't there. Unlocking the door, Harry leads me into his hotel room. I walk around taking a peak at it, trying to calm the nerves. Harry was only a few steps behind me, placing his hand on my lower back and kisses my shoulder. "You sure about this?" I ask.

"Never been more sure of anything."

Unzipping the back of my dress, his lips ghost my sun kissed skin. Once at the nape of my neck, then twice atop my shoulder. His feather-like touch down my spine makes me shiver, and he chuckles. "Nice to know I remember what makes you tick."

"Do you remember how I-" suddenly his grip on my locks tightens and twists around once, then twice, pulling just hard enough where my neck leans back to look into his forest green lust filled eyes, "mmm like a little pain with your pleasure? Of course I do. Never forgot."

The thin straps of my cobalt blue midi dress slouch, exposing the top of my chest. Harry's hands gravitate to them, massaging them as I feel his lips suck the sensitive part right behind my ear. The tiniest of whimpers leave my lips when his thumbs begin to toy with my nipples over the material. He definitely remembers how to make my body do what he wants it to, and I will always remember what makes him tick too.

My hand reaches around his neck, lightly scratching his scalp just before I tug at the unruly locks. Harry gasps and sighs, "fuck, do that again."

Turning in his embrace, body flush with his, I shoot him a sly look. "Only if you say please."

"M'not sayin' please."

"Oh come on, you know you like to beg." My free hand slides down his pants, toying with the button. "I'll let you come in me if you say please."

When I tell you I'd never seen his expression go from sweet and boyish to animalistic and feral in 2.5 seconds, I mean it. Hooded eyes and bottom lip tucked between his bunny teeth, he groans. "Please do that again." Tugging harder this time, Harry's jaw clenched so hard I thought his teeth would crack. Hunger takes over him as his lips engulfs my own, tongues fighting for space in each others mouths. He was always one to dominate, that I knew well, but this time it was my turn.

Maybe something's do change.

Wasting not even a millisecond, his hands grip my hips, tugging my dress all the way up past my belly. I have to break from him to yank it all the way down my body, leaving me in nothing but a nude thong and heels. Harry's knees visibly go weak. "my god," he sits down on the edge of the bed. "You are more beautiful than I remember."

Taking a step towards him I kick off my heels one at a time as he palms himself over his dress pants. I couldn't help but feel powerful seeing him like this, sitting and waiting patiently like a good boy, all for me. I place my hands on his shoulder and dip my lips down to his ear, "Now did I say you could touch yourself?"

Pulling back, shock flashed in his eyes, "N-no, you didn't."

"Then wait." An idea flashes through my mind, so I proceed to unbutton his trousers, pulling them down to his ankles. Now left in a half buttoned dress shirt and black Calvin Klein briefs, I straddle his thigh right atop his tiger tattoo. Harry's arms wrap around my waist, holding me snug against his chest. Open mouth kisses litter my neck and my hips begin to roll back and forth.

He chuckles, "missed it, huh?"

I couldn't help but giggle. "You know it, babe." Panting harder and harder as I chase the high, Harry holds my thong to the side, making it far easier to get off. I know me on top of him like this is torture, but I needed this. All I could think about was his tattoo after we spent the whole day on the beach yesterday. He caught me staring a handful of times, and if I didn't know any better, he made sure to have his swim trunks kept bunched up enough for the tiger to be visible.

Well, fine by me.

"Had me thinkin' about it all fuckin day yesterday, you made sure of that didn't you." I chastised.

"Mhm, it's your weakness." His tone laced with arrogance made my heart jump. I always loved how cocky he was, and he's never been cocky in a disrespectful way, but more self assured. He always knew what he wanted and stood firm on what he brought to the table. And right know, I'm wondering why we never gave long distance a shot. He's carnal in the bedroom, but adoring and sweet all other times. No other man has giving me the best of both worlds, until Harry.

One last roll of my hips and the band in my belly snaps. Pure pleasure courses through my body from the top of my head to the tips of my toes, and I couldn't have been more satisfied. My moans mixed with happy laughter and tears of joy. I haven't had an orgasm that intense in years. Harry watches me unravel before him, and he looks fond of himself. "Didn't even let me touch you yet and look at ya, makin' a mess." His arms tighten as he picks me up and lays me onto the duvet. " filthy girl tonight."

Blissed out and dizzy, I simply nod.

I lay back with my eyes closed and head spinning when I hear the sound of Harry's pants hitting the hardwood floor.

I could feel the shift of the bed as he climbed over me, hovering inches from my face.

I could smell his tobacco vanille cologne engulf my nose. It smelled so much like home to me.

His lips connect with mine, tasting of red wine and spearmint.

I was in literal heaven once again. 

Soft lips travel down my throat and land on my sternum. Peeling open my eyes I see him nestled between my legs, making himself comfortable gazing longingly at me. "What's on your mind?" I ask.

He shrugs, "nothin'. Just taking this all in."

I couldn't stop the smile that creeped in, "me too." I peck his forehead, then his nose, lifting his chin I plant a kiss with a loud mwah! "Missed you."

"I've missed you, too, peach."

Harry's large hands graze my sides and land on my hips. "You still on the pill?"

"Of course."

"And you're sure you wanna do this?" He asks.

I roll my eyes and wrap my legs around his waist, "yes. Please, I want this."

"Just this once, okay?" He uttered.

"Just this once." I echo.

Discarding his briefs and my thong, we were chest to chest, flesh to flesh, once again after four long excruciating years apart. But it was as if no time had passed when his hips rolled into my slowly, how the familiar groan he makes when he fills me to the hilt rumbles inside his chest. No one has ever come close to him, and they probably never will.

"You ok?" He pants. I nod, "move, please." He pulls further out of me and rolls back in dangerously slow, eliciting quite a long moan out of me. He doesn't stop kissing me for even a second, and neither do I. It's like we wanted to drown in one another, one last time. Hitching my left leg up, Harry pulls back and anchors my ankle atop his shoulder. A devilish smile peers down at me, "Is no one takin' care of you properly?"

Before I could answer, a hard thrust forward knocks the wind out of my chest. He does it again, again, and again, the best combination of pain and pleasure. Feeling his hand grip around my neck, Harry leans over my body, changing the angle, "baby, I asked you a question."

"No, no one has. Not since you!" I cry.

"Tsk tsk. That's a damn shame." He tuts. "Don't you worry, peach, I'll get you there."

Dropping my leg abruptly, he leaves me empty and leans back on his knees. I sit up on my elbows, leering at him annoyed. "Ok, that right there is not-"

"Hush and turn around."

I sit up, wanting to push him a little and fold my arms over my chest. "And what if I didn't wanna turn around?"

Cocking his head to the side, he glares playfully at me. "When did you get so bratty?"

I shrug and move closer to him, now seated on my knees, eye to eye, soft green and icy blue, "ever since I had to fuck shit men since you. No one knows what I like. And right now, I don't feel like turning around. That ok with you?"  His eyes bounce between my own, mouth agape in surprise. "Anything you want." 

"Then lay back."

Before I knew it, we were at it again with me taking full control. Sinking down with minimal effort, his eyes roll to the back of his head. He did always enjoy me on top, glad that hasn't changed. No other man ever lets me ride them, and it was my favorite position. Harry on the other hand has always been considerate even though he prefers to be more in charge.

His hands guide my hips back and forth when my body becomes sweaty and tired. That all too familiar feeling at the base of my spine was creeping in, and from the flushed look on Harry's face underneath me, he was on the verge of coming undone as well. "Come here."

He orders, so I lean forward allowing him to take over. Every thrust that hits that sweet spot, the bubble expands, until it finally pops. "Fuck Harry, please do stop, I'm-". Words escape me as my body goes rigid, the bliss I felt was un-fucking-imaginable. It was like the never ending orgasm, and he fucked into me to make it last even longer.

"Fuck, Jade I can't hold it." he was breathless, panting uncontrollably as he released everything he had inside of me. Its been four years, and he still gives me the most satisfying orgasms.

His thrusts grow sloppy and ragid, dropping his knees flat. The energy now simmering down, I begin to sit up to get to the bathroom and take care of business. Harry cocks a brow and tightens his arms around me. "And where do you think you're going."

"Gotta take care of that." I gesture with a nod where he's still buried inside me.

"Nuh uh." Pulling out, he flips me over and buries his face between my legs. The sensitivity was so overwhelming it hurt, but I revelled it. Pleasure with pain. I couldn't help but watch intently as Harry devours every last bit of our climax. Almost forgot how good this feels. Eventually I had to push his face back to prevent a third orgasm from happening. I was far too tired for another.  Harry disconnects his lips from me, grinning like the greedy little shit he is. "Always so good."

Harry scurries over to the bathroom and grabs a damp towel, aiding me in the remainder of the cleanup. Once I'd made myself semi decent, I wrap myself in a sheet and pick up my discarded clothing. Looking at the clock, the reception was already halfway over.

Tatiana is going to kill me. I check my phone and see a message from her of nothing but emojis: a heart, a boy, a girl, and an eggplant.

Well, I guess we aren't in trouble after all.

I could feel Harry watching me from the doorway of the bathroom. Glancing up, I see his arms crossed over his broad chest and a saddened look in his eyes. "Hey, you ok?" I ask.

He nods quickly, "mhm."

"It may have been four years baby cakes, but I still know when you're fibbing."

I couldn't stop my eyes from rolling. "It may have been four years baby cakes, but I still know when you're fibbing."

Harry rubs the back of his neck nervously, "well, I don't know if this is appropriate… but. Do you wanna just… stay?" His shoulders looked tense, like he had been holding onto that question all night. Dropping my wadded dress, I walk over to him. I take his arms into my hands, forcing him to unfold them. "Harry, don't feel weird about asking me that. I'd rather stay here with you than sleep alone."

"Really?"

I shrug, "of course." Harry brings my hands to his lips and peppers my knuckles with a million kisses, his scruffy face tickling the sensitive skin. "I'm gonna shower then?" I prompt.

Harry guides me into the en suite, turns on the shower to the hottest possible temperature, and leaves me to do my business. I felt pretty guilty for a moment for running off and boning my ex during my best friend's wedding, but I know Tatiana is going to be dying for details tomorrow, totally overlooking that the best man and maid of honor disappeared before the cake was even cut.

Feeling squeaky clean, I find a t- shirt and pair of shorts folded nicely on the bathroom counter for me. He always takes such good care of me. Once I'd made myself decent, I wandered into the bedroom feeling completely wiped. Harry was nestled in a large armchair, flipping through a book, rubbing his tired eyes. Gravitating to him, I curl up next to him, wrapping myself around his torso. "M'so tired." I mumble. "Read to me?"

"You still love that, huh." He comments, holding me close.

"Of course." I answered. "It was one of my favorite things."

"And tomorrow, if you're lucky" Harry turns to kiss my forehead, "I'll order breakfast in bed, how's that sound?"

I hum and kiss his shoulder, "And maybe you'll wake up with your cock in my mouth, if you're lucky."

"What happened to just this once?" He added.

"We were never very good at following the rules, now where were we?"

[ukiyokki]

mars reads too much dreamnotfound fanfiction for their own good

a dreamnotfound fanfic recommendation list by your resident dumbass (me)

this took way to fucking long... i’m tired

below is a (very extensive) list dedicated to all my favorite dnf fics, ranging from quick one shots to 100k+ word monstrosities that devour the storage on my computer, forever incomplete masterpieces to ongoing works of art, you get the idea. i provided links for each fic/series for your reading pleasure. there will be no smutty/nsfw fics on this list, that’s just not my vibe lmao. this list goes in no particular order, and i’ll update it from time to time when i feel like it. now, without further ado, let us begin.

Heat Waves (complete) by tbhyourelame

(wtf else did you expect, looking at a dnf rec list?) amazingly well written, and while it’s not my favorite dnf fic it’s damn near close. in the midst of a brutal heatwave, a suffering dream comes to terms with the fact that he is desperately in love with his best friend. everything i could say about this fic has already been said by nearly everyone who’s read it, so if you haven’t yet caved into the hype, just go for it. you won’t be disappointed.

Gonna be around (completed) by georgescatcafe

(mc irl) my favorite dnf oneshot to date. just read it, i don’t wanna spoil for you :)

Inferno in the Sky (ongoing)by zairielon

(star wars au) an ongoing star wars au currently clocking in at almost 200k words. need I say more? everything about it absolutely slaps, each chapter is amazingly written, and it’s just good. also, can we just appreciate dream and tubbos dynamic in here? 10/10, amazing, must protecc. oh right, a summary: george, an exiled padawan turned engineer, must return to the jedi temple after attacks on it from an unknown assailant threaten the safety of himself and the other jedi.

Like Magic (ongoing) by KangarooKen, NotGra55 (Gra55)

(harry potter au) the unofficial official dnf harry potter au. we watch the young unlikely wizard pair grow up together throughout their years at hogwarts as they battle good old fashioned wizard racism. beautifully written, incredibly fun and suspenseful, and just an overall blast and a half.

GeorgeNotFound, Son of Poseidon, and the League of Minor Gods (ongoing) by Clichewho_69, Cygnvs, Trash_Kinggg

(percy jackson au) percy jackson au? check. “road trip” (technically quest but u get what i mean)? check. enemies to friends to lovers? check. this fic follows the plot of the lightning theif (albeit loosely), but everything is explained enough where you don’t have to read percy jackson to understand what’s going on. basically after moving to the usa, george gets taken to camp halfblood where he learns that a) gods exist. b) he’s the son of poseidon and c) he needs to prove that he didn’t steal zeus’s master bolt.

Protected (completed) by aenqua

(royalty/camelot au) my favorite piece of dnf media of all time. dubbed the official dnf camelot au, where dream is the heir to the throne and george is a servants son with a secret that couldp get him killed. these childhood friends grow up together and learn trust, love, and acceptance. (that summary did not justice to the masterpiece that is this fic) here’s the directors cut

The Hunter (completed) by HederEgo

(mc irl) a choose your own adventure fic with 13 different endings, where dream the hunter must kill george and stop him from beater the ender dragon. enough said.

The official dream team cowboy AU (series)(ongoing) by antsu_in_my_pantsu

(cowboy au) cowboys and outlaws horses and shit. and the big gay. it’s a cowboy au, what else did you expect? fucking yee haw (all seriousness this is a great read, i loved it so so so so much and i can’t wait for the final chapter to release).

This is a Drista moment, let's just accept it (completed) by Qekyo

dnf fic from drista pov. considering its unique perspective, it’s perfectly done. beautifully showcases a sibling relationship through drista and her memories/moments with dream, and it just works, y’a know? also drista supremacy.

Dear Dream (completed) by Qekyo

(wwii au) i don’t cry when watching/reading anything sad. translation: i’m a heartless bitch. however, this fic is the only exception. it caused me to cry so hard my mom walked in my room and asked if i was ok. ‘nuff said.

TECHNOlogical Wingman (completed) by Closeted_Bookworm

techno is the autocorrect ai on dreams phone, and he gains sentience. interesting concept, and the author fucking nailed it. great fic.

It Was Only a Fic (ongoing) by imagineitdear

dream starts reading a dnf fanfic (we’ve all been there buddy).

Teacher’s Pet (ongoing) by niyuha

(teacher au) in which dream is a high school english teacher and george is the new comp sci teacher in room 297.

Saltwater Secrets (ongoing) by earlgay_milktea

(mermaid/high school au) a great example of the shear amount of variety in fics this fandom has to offer. when i started reading dnf fics i would have never thought i’d find one about a mermaid george hopelessly crushing on his human friend, who happens to be his schools star swimmer. yet here i am, and i am far from disappointed.

Smash My Heart (incomplete) by dontrollthedice

george and sapnap are commentators for duper smash brothers tournaments, and george develops a crush on an up and coming smash streamer named dream.

roleplaying in the dark is harder than it seems (completed) by Alienu

laser tag. 10/10

solar system (completed) by quartzfia

(mc irl) george vists dream in pandora’s vault.

Ramblings of a Lunatic (completed) by jungkooksfic

ahh communicating through a notebook left on a shelf in a bookstore- what a perfect way to start a relationship.

Paint me like your French Girls (It's Charcoal, Actually) (completed) by Turtle_ier

(artist au) george is an art student, and dream is a model.

00:00:00 (completed) by isleofdreams

(soulmate au) 00:00:00 is the moment you meet your soulmate, as indicated but the clock ticking down on your wrist until the moment you meet. i’m not a fan of soulmate aus; this fic is the exception.

Blue Skies Smilin' At Me (completed) by kivy

(artist au) i don’t usually cry while reading stuff, but this brought me damn near close. george is a painting conservator and chats it is with the ghost of the artist if the painting he is working on. they fall in a love.

Current Location (incomplete) by hendollana

(influencer au) george simps for a hot american instagram model. who knew he’d actually follow back?

The Withering (series) (series ongoing, 1 work completed) by App1e_Juice

(mc irl) lore and world building and fight scenes and everything i crave. what’s not to love? something starts making the plants and crops around dreams village wither, and must team up with new friends to find the cause of the mysterious disease plaguing the land.

Minecraft, But You Can't Leave (complete) by facadecake

(mc irl) dream and george are sucked into their own private minecraft world together and must beat the game to escape.

Free The Game, Beat the End (incomplete) by goatgoatwasfound

(mc irl) a glitch in minecraft causes thousands of players from around the world to be trapped inside minecraft, with only one way of escape- beating the ender dragon. first dnf fic i ever read, and it’s still 10/10 for me.

Why don't you come a little closer? (completed) by lifeofandoms

george gets stood up by a date, and Dream pretends he’s the date to save george from the embarrassment. simply adorable.

lightning bug (completed) by saintachesP

(band au) while on tour, dream realizes his feeling for george.

Hold me closer (completed) by Treesofmyheart

(mc irl/dsmp) i just,, really like this trope.

Dizzy on caffeine (completed) by GleamingGreenGoggles

(coffee shop au) best dnf coffeeshop au i’ve read. periodt.

living a life of crime isn’t always easy (series) (completed) by itisjosh

(mafia/assassin au) stockholm syndrome except it’s not weird.

Inhibitions Make Interesting Situations (completed) by Ship_On_The_Sea

i pissed myself laughing. it’s just a dream and george being hilariously dense, flustered idiots. serotonin central.

thy eternal summer shall not fade (completed) by gracequills

(high school au) that moment when you recite shakespeare to your crush in your ap lit class instead of confessing (hate it when that happens).

All is Fair in love and Football (ongoing) by graciegirl2001

(college au) #1 favorite college au. in which george is a cheerleader, and dream is the football teams rising star player. this one gets extra points because of the amazing karlnap moments sprinkled throughout. *chefs kisses air*

online love (completed) by andbutso

(high school au) online classes go zoooooooom

Can’t help falling (completed) by isleofdreams

dream re-learns the guitar to sing to george on his birthday. beautiful. fluffy. amazing

dance in the rain and my arms (completed) by lazy_kitkat

george is a rain god, and dream is a wind god

Weather Boy (completed) by DaintyDiizzle

wouldn't you like to know, weather boy? (where dream can control the rain)

The color orange (completed) by anon

(mc irl) dream describes the colors of a sunset

Family Mode (completed)by Strawberry_flavoured_tears

they’re dads :,)

Breathing Room (incomplete) by papercranes

(band an) an amazing band au. the mad lad author wrote original songs for each chapter. above and beyond, mad props :). unfortunately, it’s incomplete

Piece of Clay (completed) by carbonbrine

(artist au) george is a sculptor and his sculpture comes to life- but oh no he’s hot.

Try (completed) by Not4typicalwriter

(royalty au) george must choose a suitor, but none of them are up to dream, his head knights, standards. or dream is hella jelly. also protective dream is perfect

When the Roses Bloom (completed) by HederEgo

(royalty au) close second for my favorite fic. go to royalty au for a quick serotonin bost. it’s all fluff and flowers and crushes, and i love it. criminally underrated.

Heavenstruck (ongoing) by dontrollthedice

george is dreams guardian angel, and dream want to find out more about him and his past life. bittersweet :,)

Bang and Burn (completed) by App1e_Juice

(spy au) george accidentally falls for target number 1 on sapnap’s secret agency’s hit list. this ones great, i love me a spy au :)

Can I get a uhh… (completed) by lemonskies

dream keeps pulling up to the drive through mcdonald’s that george works at drunk.

Pretty Stranger (completed) by anon

when looking for dream in the terminal, george sees a cute guy and decides to flirt.

Take my Hand (completed) by latinbias

(royalty au) another royalty au? poggers. surprise twists? double poggers. love this a lot.

seconds, minutes, hours, lifetimes (complete) by meridies

ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP *inhales to compose herself* roadtrip au. unrequited love, ignored feelings, longing, pining, you know the drill. absolutely love this one, its the best roadtrip au i have ever read, in any fandom. (maybe cause i identify with it a little too much, but thats not important. whats important is that you read this fic. right now. im waiting).

Message redacted (complete) by justyouraverageloser

(text fic) dream asks for a girls number and realises hes been given the wrong number. however, an unexpected relationship starts to form between him and the stranger on the other end of the line.

the waves (completed) by anon

(mc irl) this fic was written by the same anon who wrote the color orange, which is up there on my fav dnf oneshot list. dream and george know they have a higher purpose. they don’t know where they came from, or why they are seemingly the only humans in the world, or how they feel about eachother, or even where the skeletons come from, but they are sure of one thing: they have to beat a dragon.

The Dream Doll (completed) by PeppDream (Pep_Pizza)

(voodoo i guess) i’m a real big fan of fics with really out there or unique concepts, so naturally this one makes the cut! i really liked it, it’s really sweet and made me think a lot about what matters to me in the world. george finds a strange doll in an antique shop, and would really like to just stuff it in a drawer and forget about it. sadly (?), the doll has other plans.

last updated February 6th, 2021

[ayzrules]

✶ 𝐇𝐗𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐒: 𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 & 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒, 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇 & 𝐃𝐀𝐌𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍   Long story short, I have been thinking about this for wayyyyy too long now and wanted to get some ~thoughts~ & analysis written down! This post is going to be...fairly long, lol. Apologies in advance :D

  Also, if you can’t see the last gif (the one for ‘holy’), click here. Tumblr keeps fucking up the image when i try to upload it :////

  This post is probably going to be about 2/3 yorknew & phantom troupe/kurapika focused, 1/3 chimera ants, maybe with some references to other arcs (including manga-only arcs) mixed in. so, ofc, tons of spoilers ahead! also, i realize that my blog theme is hard to read (and i’m p sure clicking ‘keep reading’ sends you to the og post itself), so i’m linking the post w/ full text copy/pasted in on my art backup side blog (which has a more legible font) here. 

✶ 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇   I’m sure absolutely nobody is surprised with me starting here - there is just. SO. MUCH. DEATH. in hxh. & right from the start, one thing I noticed that togashi really emphasized was the #4 and its connection to death. in japanese, chinese, and im p sure some other asian cultures the number 4 is pronounced like the word for death so it’s associated with death in general, and boy oh boy does the ‘deadly number 4′ thing show up E V E R Y W H E R E. we get to the hunter exam, and hisoka is applicant #44. kurapika is #404. i didn’t notice it at first, but this was so intentional holy shit. togashi is NOT SUBTLE.

  So pika & hisoka are, right off the bat, associated with death. okay. and then there are even more clues to drive the point home: hisoka is member #4 in the phantom troupe, kurapika’s birthday is april 4th (aka 4/4). 100% not a coincidence (!!). with hisoka, it’s pretty obvious why togashi’s throwing all this death 444444 stuff around - dude is a psycho murder pedo clown, literally gets off on killing people (and there’s also the fact that judas sits 4th from the left in the last supper painting, and he’s sort of the judas equivalent for the phantom troupe). with kurapika, though, it’s a bit more subtle and woven deeper into his characterization, which i LOVE. togashi puts the mans in blue & gold & white (traditionally ‘pure’ or ‘heavenly’ colors), makes him so fucking kind & so good-hearted.....when he’s not relentlessly pursuing his revenge, ofc. more on this in the next section, but pika = death. togashi has made that v v v clear.

  Backtracking a bit to hisoka, though, I also just wanted to point out the 4 is death symbolism in the fortunes too (GOD i love the fortunes): in one translation, he’s the false fourth moon, and in the og japanese (i think), he’s the false hare (4th in the lunar zodiac or w/e it’s called. i don’t know the japanese cultural influences here, but in the chinese legend that established the zodiac animals, they race across the heavenly river & the top 12 animals got zodiac slots. the hare finished 4th, so it’s #4 in the cycle). 

  And just as a final note, Tserriednich is the fourth prince of the kakin empire, and also another dude who has a hard-on for murder & other gory shit. again: togashi is not subtle with this, lmfao

✶ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐘, 𝐔𝐍𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐘   As probably everyone who’s gotten to yorknew knows, togashi is so 0 fucks given when he wants to be. I mean there’s the whole thing where he just. took New York and decided, Yorknew. LMFAO, but also, he made the main antag of that arc be named chrollo lucilfer, sit around in a ruined church, have a reversed cross coat, pale & dark-haired/dark-eyed, generally dressed in dark colors, very terrible murder guy. liiiike......chrollo x devil symbolism game is 1000/10 at this point lmaooo

  And i know absolutely nothing about christianity in general, but pt/kurapika & yorknew arc is just so full of christian imagery/symbolism! one thing that i L O O O O O O V E though is how togashi really blurs the traditional christian-coded good/evil, holy/damned boundaries.

  Back to kurapika: he wears gold and blue, his coloring is very stereotypically ‘angelic’, he’s precious and good and kind. his chains are all about ~judgment~ and ~healing~ - some of the chains are also in literal cross shapes, aren’t they? And the chain dagger in his own heart...the imagery is very startlingly similar to the immaculate heart of mary, where the swords stabbing thru the heart apparently represent seven sorrows. IDK much about this stuff other than the visual similarities; literally had to google ‘daggers through heart christianity?’ to even get the name of that thing LOL. anyway, at first, it seems like togashi establishes him as the ‘angel’, the ‘good’, the ‘holy’ in the angel/devil, good/evil, holy/damned dichotomy between him and chrollo.

  But that’s not the end of the story. his entire storyline is driven by a huuuuuuuge giant desire for vengeance, first of all, and then there’s the scarlet eyes, which canonically are seen as demonic/cursed/what have you (according to one of the movies or smth? where they show pika as a 10 y/o?), and then we also have red eyes in modern culture being associated w pretty much the same thing (vampires, anyone?). the fight scene with uvo has everything in b&w besides the blood on his face & his red eyes & the moon (<<< more fortune foreshadowing & symbolism, i love to see it), and there are tonssss of scenes where he has to suppress his rage. so all of that is obviously not very angelic of him i would say LOL. in fact, what i find super interesting is that the scarlet/red eyes (which are ‘demonic’) is actually the driving factor behind his super powerful nen abilities; this ties in so well with the fortunes & death associations imo! the fortunes call him the ‘death-bringer’ in one translation, or ‘half-angel, half-death’, so that’s one side of pika = red eyes = death, but there’s also the fact that emperor time is literally draining his life force. so pika = death for both himself and others namely the pt, question mark?

  Now for chrollo: togashi’s devil symbolism is EXTREMELY overt with him, but i love the subtler jesus references too. the church thing, obviously, and the st. peters cross which is cuz st peter respected jesus too much & didn’t think he was worthy to die in the same way as him (or something like that, i am the most atheist person in the world & hxh is literally my entire christian education pls) but is also used as an anti-christianity symbol these days. bandit’s secret looks like a bible, lbr, and mans has a cross tattoo.

  Other things beyond visuals - 12 spiders, 12 apostles; hisoka’s betrayal, where member #4 can be thought to correspond to judas sitting 4th from left at last supper. and this miiiiight be a bit of a stretch, but i think the meteor city being the place of origin may also play into the blurred line between angel/devil and holy/damned here; meteors are defined as space rocks that are in earth’s atmosphere, becoming incandescent in the process. meteorites are for the kinds that actually reach the ground. and idk, lucifer was cast out of heaven / sky too right? so i think there might be some subtle fallen angel imagery/symbolism playing into the pt as well

✶ 𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 (𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐊𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒)   Last section yay! i don’t have as much to say about this, besides when i was making chimera ant arc edits & realized that there might have been some subtle gon/meruem parallels???

  So obviously, everyone knows that line killua says to gon - “you are light” - and then i was just remembering that meruem’s name means.... “light that illuminates all” (!!!!). maybe it’s a coincidence, but knowing togashi, i’m leaning towards nahhhh. there HAS TO be some kinda meaning there (!!).

  Going back to the events of the chimera ant arc....ooh boy. let’s see: gon is optimistic & hopeful even in the face of kite potentially being dead, killua says he’s light, they find kite & dude is fucked up, gon is pissed. gets all angry & ~dark~, especially during the palace invasion when he’s staring pitou down as she fixes up komugi. then the actual fight against pitou: more darkness, more anger, but through it all there’s still light, namely his jajanken being very orange & fiery lookin.....and that final sequence, where he puts all his possible nen he’d ever have into his ~final form~ or wahtever & turns into a male version of true form!bisky but dressed in a crop top & short-shorts (i am SCARRED, btw. s c a r r e d !). there’s just huuuge flashes of light as that’s going on, and it reminded me of supernovas or dying stars when i was thinking about it, where the star is like, collapsing under its own weight? & burning thru its own fuel, until there’s nothing left except a dwarf or black hole or what have you. one final, extremely deadly burst of light & energy before death.

  On the meruem side of things: born into a dark cave, exhibits a traditionally evil/cruel/wicked/whatever personality/traits so that has ppl associating him with darkness. then he gets to know komugi, starts to appreciate other aspects of humanity, seems like he could have actually turned into a decent person who doesn’t want to eat everyone - so that’s a ‘path to light’, maybe? - and then the extermination team yeets themselves into the palace, netero takes him out to bumfuck nowhere, they fight. netero’s fighting is just ALL light, from his giant ass golden 100-type guanyin bodhisattva to the poor man’s rose. again, there’s the sense of finality to it all, in a similar vein to dying stars: netero comes in determined to kill meruem no matter what, and we all know netero doesn’t flake. then we see netero get destroyed after the zero hand, and he triggers the rose, and everything is burning & on fire before the flames are put out and all turns dark again.

  But wait!!! pouf & youpi revive meruem and all he does is play gungi with komugi, even with the poison of the rose. he eventually dies, and the gungi pieces in that final shot of them together (i am BAWLING just thinking about it holy shit) has one that’s all white, one that’s a black ring and white inside. i assume all white is for komugi, who has never done ANYTHING wrong in her LIFE, so i like to think that the 2nd one is for meruem - born “into darkness”, literally & figuratively, but he turns something like ‘good’ by the end. it’s interesting how togashi has sort of gone for a bit of a subversion here: the hero going from light to darkness, and the main antag from darkness to light.

✶ 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐋𝐔𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍   AahhhhHHHHHhhh so if you read all the way down here through my LONG rambles, tysm! i would LOVE LOVE LOVE to hear what other people think about all this, and i’ve FOR SURE missed tons and tons of stuff - chimera ants is just. SO MUCH. and i don’t know it as well as yorknew eeek.

  I’m not sure if i’m really ~knowledgeable~ in any other areas relating to hxh, so this might be the only one of these that i do, but i definitely think about some of this - esp all the religious symbolism & #4 stuff - a ton! so in the meantime, if it’s of any interest, i’m just going to shamelessly plug my hxh x religious beliefs/superstitions edit series :D lots of love to all!!!

[genderbinaryisforlosers]

everyone on the carte blanche for the ask meme

everyone? oh boy this is gonna get long ajfhdsf

JUNO

First impression: i, like a lot of people who get into the podcast without knowing a great deal about it, was expecting at most an ambiguously bisexual angst machine with a closely-guarded heart of gold. juno being an explicitly bisexual genderqueer angst machine is perhaps the most pleasant surprise of my life. the angst machine heart of gold characters were kind of my type at the time, so i loved him right away

Impression now: every time i think about juno’s arc from depressed mess held together by bad coping mechanisms, safety pins, and a few good strong puns into someone who can talk about his feelings, feel comfortable about being happy, and recognise when he needs to change, i want to cry about it a little bit. the depth of my love for juno steel has only grown along with him

Favourite moment: juno has a lot of great one-liners and i’m still a big fan of the “on the other hand i wasn’t wearing a watch” bit and who can forget such classics as juno finally deciding to stop moping over nureyev and move on only for him to open the door to his apartment and find nureyev sitting in the dark dramatically, but honestly nothing will ever hit me harder than his sudden, pissed-off declaration of “i can’t die yet, i still have shit to do!” in promised land. god.

Idea for a story: oh i have so many and i want to write most of them so no spoilers, but juno accidentally kidnaps a baby during a carte blanche heist and shenanigans ensue

Unpopular opinion: obviously we all know he’s dummy thicc but i feel like a lot of people forget he’s an actual genius, like the stuff he notices and how he strings it together is sometimes so obscure and he’s almost always right. oh, also juno is not skinny and i will not be taking criticism on that

Favourite relationship: this is so tough because every dynamic is so good, but i think it has to be juno and rita. those two are so good! the best best friends in the world!! i’m really a sucker for any dynamic that’s ridiculously in-sync so i loved these two as soon as juno saw rita’s notes in prince of mars and went “makes perfect sense to me” (which it probably didn’t, because rita, but he trusted that she knew what she was doing which is the important part)

Favourite headcanon: this isn’t really a headcanon but i still think about how juno is (was?) deathly afraid of heights but when he heard rex glass coming he still attempted to climb out of the window. either his aversion to working with dark matters/other people in general was so strong is overrided his fear, or his office was actually on the ground floor. not sure which of these is funnier.

NUREYEV

First impression: we’ve all seen the memes about nureyev knowing juno steel for one (1) day and deciding to Risk It All by leaving him with his name, look at this Hopeless Romantic, this utter DISASTER of a homosexual. the fact the very next time we hear from nureyev (at least directly) he’s patiently waiting in juno’s dark apartment to surprise him with a heist definitely supports this image.

Impression now: even after literally being inside peter’s head, i feel like we didn’t get a real sense of who he is until man in glass, where we find out he aggressively compartmentalises everything that causes him stress. he’s also distinctly someone who’s had his heart broken before, i think, which makes those first appearances of his very strange. but it does remind me of what juno says about diamond, and how he decided to provide the trust first and wait for the trustworthiness to grow in (only to get severely hurt), and i think that’s exactly what nureyev did. i am also... very uneasy with how suspicious he’s behaving this season because obviously i want to believe he’ll sort it all out and not betray the crew but... oof

Favourite moment: the beginning of what lies beyond pt1 where he’s affectionately bullying juno into taking care of himself? cleared my crops watered my skin etc etc etc

Idea for a story: i’d love to hear more about his past as a young thief idolising buddy and vespa (i can’t actually remember if that’s canon or fanon but anyway i wanna read it!)

Unpopular opinion: i think people often cling to an image of him that more resembles his first impressions in season 1 instead of seeing the depth that we’ve been given about his character in season 3

Favourite relationship: him and juno but honestly it’s a close call between them and his budding friendship with rita. even though she learned it by accident, his name is still a point of intimacy and it’s one less secret to keep around her which has to be a weight off his shoulders, at least a little? they seem like they could be really good friends once ultrabots is out of the way. juno steel love (and also bullying) zone activates whenever they’re together

Favourite headcanon: i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again - nureyev has never done a household chore in his goddamn life. he doesn’t know the water needs to be hot when you wash dishes.

RITA

First impression: honestly i’m not sure? i don’t remember having a big awareness of her in murderous mask but i remember loving her “note-taking” in prince of mars, i thought she sounded really fun and cute

Impression now: rita is really fun and cute, she’s also an extremely hardworking and dedicated woman who had the guts to throw in with a detective fired from the force and then invest all of her time and money into helping him help people.

Favourite moment: Rita Gets A Knife. enough said

Idea for a story: i don’t know honestly! i really struggle to write rita because her thought processes are so wild and i don’t think any story i could come up with would match mega ultrabots of cyberjustice.

Unpopular opinion: this shouldn’t be unpopular because juno steel himself shares this opinion but all future-jupeter headcanons are incomplete without rita also being a huge part of their lives

Favourite relationship: rita + franny 4ever obviously.. jk it’s juno & rita have you heard rita minute 3 they’re too adorable for this world. im still Soft over their conversation at the end of soul of the people when he said he couldn’t stay in hyperion anymore but he wouldn’t leave with the carte blanche if rita wasn’t coming because he was done leaving her behind, and she threw out all her hesitations on the spot and said call the big guy. speaking of, rita & jet are a close second. instant best friends i love them.

Favourite headcanon: i think this is basically canon now but rita being literally half the height of jet is so good

JET

First impression: “haha lorge funny man puts juno in the trash”

Impression now: jet sikuliaq is one of the dearest characters to me out of anything ever. he is a huge, menacing, polite, kind, sincere man who i would very much like to give me a hug. he’s the best aro ace in outer space and while being generally very levelheaded and straightforward, also takes every opportunity to fuck with juno because it’s very easy and very hilarious to him personally. he is everything my autistic acearo ass needed and i’m so glad to have him

Favourite moment: all of them every single one. him putting juno in the trash is of course a classic and every moment jet chooses to be funny makes my heart happy, but also every piece of genuine advice he gives. i’m a particular fan though of buddy recounting her years in the lighthouse and him saying he became concerned when she didn’t come downstairs at the usual time. “you took the door off its hinges.” “i was deeply concerned.” king of understatement

Idea for a story: again no spoilers for you but..... tools of rust time loop au

Unpopular opinion: this isn’t “unpopular” as much as it is unknown but jet is buddy’s queerplatonic partner and i will keep saying it until everyone believes it

Favourite relationship: jet and buddy,,, just everything about them. the way he suspects when she’s lying, the way she makes tea for him when she expects him to drop by. the fact he comes to check on her when she is 41 seconds late to the family meeting because it’s unlike her to be late and the last time she was late for something her brain was turning to radiation soup. but most especially the way she snaps at him to stay out of her business and he said he could not because he made her promise eight years ago to never stay out of the business of her health, no matter how many times she asked. they r literally in a qpr

Favourite headcanon: i don’t think this is true but i still think it would be funny if the ruby-7 used to be painted red but when jet got it he had it painted green because he Just Really Likes Green (as evidenced by his hovercycle). it’s very funny to me.

BUDDY

First impression: it’s been a minute since i relistened to time gone by but i’m pretty sure the first thing she ever says in the podcast is sliding up to depressed accidental whiskey thief juno and say “that’ll be ten million creds,” scaring the shit out of him, so needless to say i was in love instantly.

Impression now: my love for buddy aurinko has only grown and if it sounds like i already said that in this post it’s because i did about juno and it’s appropriate because the parallels are astounding. the heart of it all gave us such depth to buddy’s internal monologue and why she always sounds like she knows exactly what to say and what that’s like and honestly will i ever be over the heart of it all as an episode? unlikely. i think i’m gonna have a little piece of it in MY heart forever.

Favourite moment: everything she’s ever said is iconic as hell i especially like “in an impressive fit of hubris i’ve decided not to prepare my words for this vow” which made me laugh out loud but once again i must give it up for her iconic “I WANT TO LIVE” moment. honourable mentions to her taking rita out for ice cream and giving juno shooting lessons while she’s in her actual wedding gown. i love her

Idea for a story: buddy and vespa as sun/moon dieties.... that’s all

Unpopular opinion: stop drawing her with a fancy high-tech eye like the theia!! it canonically looks like garbage and it’s described in detail, please, i’m dying, also don’t minimise her scars you bastards

Favourite relationship: buddy and vespa invented romantic love and the entire carte blanche crew’s relationship to her is great but you know by now i’m a slut for buddy & jet out-of-this-world queerplatonic partners. the way she checks in on him during tools of rust to make sure he’s not relapsing and he comes to find her when she is 41 seconds late in the heart of it all to make sure she’s not having a heart problem!! it’s the trust,, the devotion,, the mortifying ordeal of being known

Favourite headcanon: she can sing. absolutely tears it up at karaoke. i’m right

VESPA

First impression: knife lesbian goes STAB. she will heal your wounds but she will be threatening to give you more the whole time

Impression now: she is extremely strong, heart-rendingly tender, and despite being in the older half of the carte blanche crew somehow has unmistakable little sister energy which makes her downright hilarious. i’m so glad she got to marry buddy and they’re official space wives now they’re so good for each other

Favourite moment: both from shadows in the ship, either “GUN!!” “KNIFE?!” (iconic) or when she clocks the dark matters drone pretending to be juno because it called her crazy and juno wouldn’t call her crazy. i’m always a sucker for “shapeshifter fails to fool mark because they Know Each Other Too Well” and it was just *chefs kiss* so good

Idea for a story: i really want to write something about when she was first staying at the lighthouse with buddy post-reunion, and getting to know jet and stuff. i think it would be cute

Unpopular opinion: i know vespa doesn’t canonically have lots of scarring but people who don’t draw her with scarring? cowards.

Favourite relationship: once again, although buddy and vespa invented romantic love, i just love the dynamic between vespa and juno so much. they’ve come so far with each other and their weird sibling dynamic gives me life. at the end of what lies beyond when juno says “we’re not gonna kill her, vespa” and instead of sounding full of Rage and Suspicion she’s like “whyyy notttt?” and he’s like “because i said so!” and that’s just good enough for her even if she’s a bit grumpy about it. i love it.

this took.. a hot minute to do! jshkfjsdgsa thank you dyl ily <3

[iron--spider]

you’re as good as it gets

“Whoever would have thought Peter would replace me?” Tony asks, peering over at Pepper as they set the table. “I guess I should have. I guess I should have seen it coming. I’m not as cool as I once was.”

 “I am going to record you,” Pepper says, glancing up as she sets the silverware down. “And then I am going to send the videos to Peter, whenever you do this.”

 “Good,” Tony says. “Then maybe he’ll see how much he’s hurting his old man—” Pepper starts coming at him with the dish towel, and Tony laughs, holding his hands up in surrender. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Sort of.”

 “This is what you wanted him to do, right?” she asks, bracing her hand on the chair and looking at him. “This Octavius guy, doing this with him gets Peter college credit?”

 “The class does,” Tony says, chewing on a toothpick. “The working with him thing is a whole different...thing.”

 “He’s just living his life,” Pepper says, and she’s looking at him sadly now, like she might get it. “Getting better after everything he’s gone through. You know he’s not actually replacing you, he’s just—”

 “No, I know,” Tony says, laughing a little bit. “I know. I’m just being dramatic. To irritate you.”

 “Mhm. Easily done.”

 Tony doesn’t know much about Otto Octavius. Well, he knows everything he learned after he heavily, heavily researched him when Peter started working with him in his lab on the weekends. But, he doesn’t know Octavius as a person, and he doesn’t hardly trust anybody with Peter, even people he trusts. Logically, this is a good thing. Peter’s preparing for college. He’s getting back into the groove of things after...all the bullshit. He was having a hard time with it, for a while. Being gone for five years. His life upended. Tony nearly dying in front of him and losing an arm as a result of the near death. So Tony knows this is good. The kid’s moving on.

 He’s moving on?

He’s moving...on. 

 Tony’s had a lot of people move on from him. He expects it. He expects every day for Pepper to up and leave, for Morgan to pack up her little pink Hello Kitty suitcase and disappear in the wind. Rhodey never picking up his calls again. Happy slamming the door in his face. All of them would probably beat the shit out of him if they knew he still thought that way, but it’s so ingrained in him that it’s hard to push it back.

 He knows it would piss Peter off too. So Tony never says anything to him about his own dumb shit or his worries or his occasional loneliness, despite his firecracker of a daughter who’s been dressing up in Spider-Man costumes lately. But Tony misses Peter. And feels a dumb tinge of jealousy knowing he’s learning and growing with some other asshole scientist mentor guy. Tony is supposed to be the only asshole scientist mentor guy in his life.

 His phone buzzes in his pocket.

 “Speak of the devil,” Tony says, opening up Peter’s message. 

 “See, there you go,” Pepper says, laying out napkins. “He wouldn’t be messaging you if he’d replaced you. He’s too polite for that.”

 The message is a photo—a billboard of Tony himself, the kind of shit that started cropping up everywhere after everyone found out what he did. Suited up, sans helmet, staring upwards with a look of determination and grit on his face, like some kind of stained glass church art. Peter is in the foreground, both eyebrows raised, and it’s captioned “TONY ARE YOU STALKING ME?”

 “What a nerd,” Tony says, full of fondness. 

 “Make sure he knows he’s coming for movie night tomorrow or Morgan will never forgive him,” Pepper says. 

 “Noted,” Tony says, crafting a reply.

 ~

 A couple days later Tony is falling asleep sitting up in the workshop, still analyzing the layout for the new bot he’s creating to accompany DUM-E and U. He’s seen Peter a couple times in the past week, but the kid looks more worn out than normal with every new day that passes. Tony had texted a bit with May, trying not to worry, but that’s practically his every day state of mind, especially when it comes to his kids. 

 His kids. Plural. Two. How long has he been thinking about Peter like that? One of his own. Since before the end of the world? During, while he was gone, when there were things Tony couldn’t change, when the world was so heavy that he had to remove himself from it? When his failure loomed in front of him like a crumbling shadow, the darkness drawing all the light away from him?

 Was it then? Or was it when he saw the kid on their newfound battlefield, like a memory of a lifetime past, an impossible miracle? Talking and talking and talking like he used to?

 Tony leans forward and braces his elbows on the table, digging his thumbs into his eyes, nearly poking his own fucking eye out with his new titanium alloy thumb. It’s been a while and he’s still not used to the new arm. How it looks, how it feels, what other people think. An eternal reminder, just like the arc reactor was. Once again, he’s marked.

 He’s about to call it a night when his phone starts ringing.

 Peter.

 It’s after midnight, and yeah, he’s gotten calls from Peter at all hours of the night, but usually, it’s when he’s in trouble. 

 Tony answers fast. “Hey buddy,” he says. “You okay?”

 Peter’s breath is coming fast, and he doesn’t say anything for a moment. 

 Tony sits up straighter, eyes intent. “Peter, what’s going on?” he asks. “Talk to me.”

 “I—I, I—I made a bad decision. I didn’t know. I didn’t—I didn’t know. Help me.”

 Tony nearly leaps to his feet. Help me. Not I need help. Just help me. “Where are you?” he asks. “What happened? Who did this, what’s going on?”

 “I’m in—I’m in the suit,” Peter says, and Tony doesn’t know if he’s ever heard him sound like this. Only in the moment he knew he was dying. Or when he thought Tony was.

 “I’ll track you, are you safe?” Tony asks, getting up and sweeping towards the exit, a tension headache spreading across his forehead. “Can you stay where you are?”

 “I’ll—I’ll stay close to where I am, it should be—should be okay, but I don’t know, I don’t know.” His voice breaks and he sucks in a few gasping breaths. “I can’t think. I can’t—help me, please, I messed up, I don’t know what to do.”

 “I’m coming, I’m on my way,” Tony says, trembling now, himself, trying to summon the kind of strength that whatever this is needs. “Stay on the line with me, Pete. I’ve got you, just stay there.” He grabs his earpiece on the way out, activating it.

 “Friday, track Peter and give me the fastest possible routes to get to him,” Tony says, starting up the stairs. 

 He hasn’t had a suit on in almost a year. He hasn’t felt strong enough, safe enough, and the others have been covering it. It, the royal It, everything that needed to be done. Tony did what he could and it wound up well, and after that, nobody’s needed Iron Man. 

 But Peter needs him now.

 ~

 Tony can barely get him to talk while he’s on his way over, and that terrifies Tony even more—just short, clipped answers, wavering breathing, and it sounds like a panic attack. But Peter doesn’t seem to hear him, when Tony tries to talk him through it. He’s faraway in his head, too. 

 Tony finally finds him in an unused tunnel in Harlem, and getting over there without drawing a crowd is more difficult than Tony would have liked. But Friday finds him the way in that Peter must have found, and it’s like dropping directly into a horror movie. Quiet, echoes, dripping. 

 Peter crying.

 He’s sitting there, against the wall, his mask balled up beside him. This place is dirty and abandoned, and he looks too bright and vibrant to be here. Even in the state he’s in.

 Tony lets the nanos crawl back into the housing unit and he rushes over to him, kneeling by his side. He glances up, briefly, to make sure no one is keeping him here, that this isn’t a trap, but he doesn’t see anything anywhere. He hopes Friday would alert him to anything like that.

 “Hey, hey, okay,” Tony says, one hand on Peter’s shoulder, the other tipping his chin up. “Here I am, okay? What happened? What’d you do? I’m sure whatever it is, not your fault, we can fix it. We can fix it, together, no problem, kid. You know how much shit I’ve messed up and thought was beyond repair? Plenty. I always fix it, and we’re gonna fix this too.”

 Peter’s eyes finally focus on him, red-rimmed, and he shakes his head. He shudders to his feet, bracing his hand on the wall behind him, and he nearly falls before Tony grabs him and steadies him.

 “Otto,” Peter says, sniffling. “Doctor Octavius. He, he, he—he’s a bad guy, Tony, he’s—I’ve been helping him invent things and working on his specs and I’ve been helping him with all this stuff for months and months and he’s using it to hurt people, to commit crimes. He’s got—an entire team of guys, and I didn’t even mean to find them but I found them, tonight, they’re all these costumed villains, they were—they were working with the Rhino, that big guy I put away last month—”

 “Yeah, I remember,” Tony says, still holding onto him.

 “The police thought he had people behind him, more—more powerful people, but tonight I went after these guys that had robbed a bank on 4th street and I webbed up one of them but the other got away and I followed him—but I realized he was leading me somewhere bigger, and there were—Tony, he was there, Otto, he was in charge—he’s using these—these arms, they look like octopus arms, and I, I—I’m the one that helped—I helped him, I helped him with those—with those specs—”

 He covers his mouth, shaking his head, and before Tony can think about hugging him he steps forward and buries his face in Tony’s shoulder. 

 Peter keeps talking, muffled. “He’s responsible—his group, these people, they’re responsible for so, so much—shit—countless robberies, kidnappings, that—that explosion, at that office building, that happened—that happened in July, that was them, Tony, and people died, and I—and I’ve been—working with him since June—”

 “Stop, stop, stop,” Tony whispers, holding onto him.

 Peter gasps, sounds like he’s gonna start choking, and he claws at Tony’s shoulders. “I should have—realized, I should have known, some—somehow, figured it out, realized, but he—he acted so, so normal, with me, and I thought he was—I thought he was doing something—good, but he’s—he’s not—”

 “And you’re sure—”

 “I’m sure,” Peter whispers, wounded. “Positive. And I—they were picking up and moving their—base and I was—freaking out too much to even—follow—keep track—”

 “Shh, relax,” Tony whispers, ruffling Peter’s hair. “Relax, breathe.”

 Peter stops talking, but his breathing is labored, and he’s holding on tight.

 “The guy that got away, that led you to all this, did he know you were following him? Did he know what you saw?”

 “Don’t think so,” Peter says. He shakes his head. “I should never have—even taken that course, with Otto, let alone started—working with him. I made a bad decision, a—a stupid decision. May is gonna be so disappointed in me. And I know...I know you don’t like him.”

 Tony scoffs, still rocking them back and forth, gently. “I didn’t not—listen, one, May can never be disappointed in you. Please. And me, I’m just—I’m just jealous. I wanna work with you, I wanna hoard you, and that’s selfish of me, whatever. That’s all. But fuck that guy, now I have a reason to hate him. We’re gonna take him down, yeah?” He pulls back, holding Peter by the shoulders. “Yeah?”

 Peter looks positively fucking miserable, but thankfully, uninjured. “I’ve been helping him, Tony,” he says, dejected. “With...God knows what. The arms, they’re—they were supposed to be for limb replacement, but he’s altered them, and they’re—they look dangerous. He was in charge, he was—with all these criminals, some I’ve seen before, some that have gotten away from me and he was—he was in charge.”

 “Listen,” Tony says, stepping a little closer. “I’ve been betrayed before. More than one time. Used for what I know, what I can do. That’s what happened here. Nothing else. You have not and will not ever hurt anybody or anything. You’re a fucking angel, kid, and this does not change that. We’re gonna take care of this. You could do it without me, because you can do anything, but I’m gonna help you every step of the way.”

 Peter heaves a sigh, the kind of motion that shows he’s still horrified and put-upon by all this, but relieved that he’s not handling it alone. Tony knows how that is. It’s always easier to have backup, especially when things are personal. They both take things to heart.

 Peter moves in and hugs him again. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. 

 “Nope,” Tony says, automatically, hugging him back. “No reason to be sorry. My least favorite phrase from you.”

 “I’m just sorry for everything,” Peter says, voice breaking again. There’s a lot more behind that one, and Tony sighs, rubbing his back.

 “Don’t be,” he says. “You’re doing everything right. The world just sucks and good people get taken advantage of. And you’re as good as it gets.”

 “But we’re gonna fix it,” Peter says, tentatively, like he’s hoping to believe it.

 “Yes,” Tony says, firmly. “We’re gonna fix it.”

[wr1ter-reader-dreamer]

The Worst Surprise (Pt. 4)

Joker x reader

Masterlist

Part 1  -  Part 2  -  Part 3

My green haired lover was lounging comfortably on my bed, the same look of pure rage that I had left him with still present on his face. I regarded him as if he were a wild animal as he slowly pushed himself up from my bed. 

“Oh baby,” he growled, “you have been a bad girl.” 

Never taking my eyes off of him, I cautiously lowered my gun and placed it on the dresser by the door. Pointing a gun at him when he was in such a bad mood would not do me any favors. Of course he noticed the movement, which triggered him to look me up and down. He apparently did not like what he saw, and let out another growl.

J eyed my bare legs as he took a step towards me, “I should kill that boy for having his hands all over what belongs to me.”

My eyes widened and my heart stopped. Shit. Shit. Shit. How long had he been following me? If J saw me dancing with James, then he probably saw me drinking too. Not to mention the fact that I went out in tiny shorts and a crop top.   

Noticing my panicked expression he grinned, “Oh you thought you would get away with it? No, no, pet, you will be punished.”

That got my blood boiling as I remembered Harley. Raising my eyes to meet his, I glared, “You can fuck other people, but I can’t?”

He growled again and stalked toward me. Gripping my face in his hands, he smashed his lips against mine. I fought against the kiss, pushing at his chest in an attempt to make him let me go. It obviously didn’t work very well since he was a lot stronger that me, but after a few seconds he let me escape. As I took a hard step back, my wig got stuck on one of J’s many rings. It slid off my head, releasing my natural blonde hair. J’s eyes seemed to be glued to it as it fell around my shoulders and down my back.

“No, J,” I shook my head,  my hair dancing around me, “You don’t get to touch me! You don’t get to touch me after touching her.”

My Clown Prince laughed shortly and raised a non existent eyebrow, “You’re mad at me?”

I nodded, an unimpressed look on my face.

“Baby girl, you shot at me and missed. You’re lucky to be alive; I’ve killed people for less,” he said through gritted metal teeth, “You have no place to be mad at me.”

Scoffing, I crossed my arms, “I didn’t shoot at you. I shot at the bitch you were cheating on me with, and I didn’t miss. She’d be dead right now if it wasn’t for that damn glass.”

Even though he looked perfectly calm, I knew that he was beyond enraged. In fact, his left eye, the one with a little J under it, was twitching. I had spent enough time studying him to know that a twitchy eye was a very bad sign. Normally when his eyes twitched, it meant that someone was about to die.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Azrael,” he ground out, his voice shaking slightly with the effort to restrain himself.

“Fuck that. In fact, fuck you. You’re an untrustworthy asshole, J, that deserves worse than just me running away.”

Having been pushed to his limit, J raised his hand as if to backhand me. My mind immediately went back to over a year ago, to our first fight. It was the only time he had ever hit me, the only time he had even raised his hand against me. The slap had knocked me to floor, causing me to hit my head on the side of his desk and loose consciousness. When I had woken up,  he wasn’t there. I found him in his office, sitting against his desk with a bottle of liquor in his hand and tear stains on his cheeks. He told me he couldn’t loose me, and promised that he would never hurt me again.

With fresh tears in my eyes, I met J’s angry glare and repeated the exact words I had said to him then, “Hit me and loose me forever. I will not be your new Harley, and I will not stand for an abusive relationship. Hit me, and even if you lock me away for the rest of my life, I will never love you again.”

J’s gaze immediately softened as he dropped his hand to his side. He knew that he had struck a nerve, and he quickly tried to fix his mistake before he pushed me too far.

“Baby,” he said in a soft voice that was quite uncommon for him, “you know I would never hurt you.”

Now that I was no longer in mortal danger, the events of the day caught up to me and I was suddenly extremely exhausted. Leaning against the doorframe beside me, I shrugged and gave him a tired smile, “J, you already did.” 

My clueless Mr. J seemed to finally realize the damage he had caused as a crestfallen look overtook his beautiful face. He didn’t know what to do, and he didn’t receive any clues from me. After a few moments of just staring at me with a sad expression, he finally decided to pull me into a hug. Too tired to fight it, I allowed him to embrace me, in turn wrapping my arms around his torso and burying my face in his chest. I inhaled his wonderful scent, and for the first time in two weeks, felt my whole body completely relax.

“Why did you do it, J?” I asked, my insecurities beginning to emerge in my tired state, “Am I not good enough for you anymore?”

J growled and pulled me tighter against his chest, “Don’t say that. You are perfect, I would never want anyone else.”

“If you really thought I was perfect, you wouldn’t have kissed her,” I grumbled quietly against his chest.

He shushed me softly, running his hand through my hair to calm me down. Unfortunately his comforting touch wouldn’t let me forget what he had done and why I had left. I may not be screaming at him, but I was angry, and I was hurt. He wasn’t going to get away with that lame answer, so I reluctantly pulled away.

J regarded me carefully as I stood up straight and crossed my arms over my chest. Fixing my eyes on his, I gave him a hard look, “I need an answer, J. Why did you kiss her?”

Gritting his teeth, J ran his hands through his bright green hair. He turned away and started to pace across my room. I just watched and waited as he seemed to be having a battle within himself. After a few moments of trying to wear a hole in my floor, J stopped suddenly and turned to face me. He had decided what his answer would be.

“You unnerve me Azrael, that’s why I let her kiss me,” he gritted out. Slightly offended, I raised an eyebrow. I opened my mouth to tell him that if anyone was unnerving it was him, when he shot me a scolding look,“You know better than to interrupt. Keep your mouth shut and listen.”

I rolled my eyes, but complied. Leaning my shoulder against the doorframe, I motioned for him to continue.

“You unnerve me because you get under my skin in a way that no one else ever has. Every little, annoying  feeling inside my body pushes me to protect you. The voices inside my head all call out for you, urging me to never leave your side. I would kill most anyone who dared to glare at me or run their mouth to me, but when you do it, I just want kiss you. When some idiot manages to piss me off or ruin a deal, you make it better. All I have to do is touch you, and all the demons go away. You tame me, Azrael,” he said, causing my heart to flutter, “that’s why I let Harley kiss me. I had hoped that it was just a stupid obsession, but when even she couldn’t pull me out of it, I knew I was screwed. I told her that I would kill her if she ever came back to Gotham as soon as you left.”

J paused to take a step toward me. My heart beat hard in my chest, trying to break through the cage of my ribs, when he grabbed my hips and pulled me towards him. There was a look in his clear blue eyes that I had never seen before as he ran his tongue over his silver teeth.

“You snuck your way into an organ I was beginning to believe I didn’t have, and now it belongs to you. I kissed Harley Quinn for the last time because I’m in love with you, and it is the only thing that has ever terrified me.”

My heart swelled and tears spilled onto my cheeks. Having never expected to hear those words from him, I was completely shocked. Six months after he had claimed me as his, J had found out that I loved him when I said it in my sleep. He had taken it better than I thought he would, but it still wasn’t the desired reaction. After we had recovered from that, I had realized that J would never be able to tell me he loved me. I had realized that J showed his feelings through his actions, and I eventually came to terms with that. Now here he was telling me he loved me, and I was absolutely elated.

I quickly wiped the tears away and closed the distance between us. Harley was completely forgotten as I pulled him into a passionate kiss. J immediately wrapped one arm around my waist and tangled the other into my hair. He crushed my body against his, his lips meeting mine in a hungry fervor. Grinning against him, I kissed him back with an equal amount of passion. 

Kissing him after so long felt like absolute heaven. J tugged at my hair, using it to tilt my head back so that he had easier access to my lips. I couldn’t help but moan as his silver teeth sunk into my lower lip. J purred, releasing my lip and pulling back to look at me.

“You’re mine, Azrael Lestat, and no one else is allowed to have you.”

I nodded, “And you, Mr. J, are mine. Don’t even think about letting another girl touch you ever again.”

He laughed and nodded. J gave me another kiss then started to walk backwards towards my bed. I smiled widely as I followed, my eyes never leaving his. When his knees hit the edge, he sat down, his hands finding my hips and pulling me between his legs. There was a mischievous look in his eyes as he gazed up at me.

I laughed, allowing the sound to fill the room. When I looked back down at J he was smiling a true, perfect smile.

“I love you Mr. J,” I whispered, running my fingers through his vibrant hair.

He allowed his eyes to slip closed and purred, “I love you too my perfect Azrael. Please don’t ever leave me again”

  “I promise J, I’ll never leave you again,” I said as he leaned his head against my stomach.  I was finally happy, and I knew that no matter what, I would always have my insane, over-protective Joker by my side.

[nahimjustfeelingit-writes]

Imagine:

Erik hears his girl roommate having some good sex and he gets jealous because he wants her.

PRT TWO

He shot her a quick text on his way home in an Uber to keep the apartment door unlocked so he could get in with ease since he was drunk from partying all damn night. She didn’t respond but she read his text and Erik hates when her ass does that. Entering his gated apartment complex, Erik drags his sneaker clad feet, rubbing his heavy eyes. What the fuck were in those shots this time around?

Finally in the building, Erik calls his roommates cell, hoping she would at least have the decency to answer it. It rang and rang and rang and Erik wanted to slam it against the elevator doors from how pissed he was with her. She was a headache. Finally on the fifth floor, Erik exits, his apartment door just ahead of him. Blinking, he juggles the door knob, surprised to see that it was indeed opened.

“This bitch,” he drags his sluggish body inside, slamming the door closed. The familiar warmth of his apartment wrapped around him like a blanket. Back against the door, he smiles with low eyes, lazily kicking off his sneakers and pulling up the bottom of his shirt to toss that too. He would usually hate leaving clothes and shoes at the door but fuck that he was tired and drunk. Naked from the waist up, Erik walks to the kitchen, noticing a water bottle sitting out on the counter top for him. At least she thought about how drunk he would be coming home. The water was finished in less than a minute and one wasn’t enough to wash away all that Hennessy.

Erik grabs himself two more bottles to take with him to bed. Checking the clock over the stove it was 4:00 am. He had to be up in about 8 hours to finish his coding project for the internship he had through school. With that weighing heavy on his mind, he ignored the first round of moans that came from his roommates bedroom. Erik didn’t take notice until he was fully undressed and under his covers. The sweet melodic sound came out again, her voice so vivid in his room as if she moaned into an intercom. Laying on his belly, his head lifted to make out the sound again, like a magnetic force it grabbed hold of his dick and balls. Erik groans, tossing his body over onto his back now.

Staring up at the pitch black ceiling, the sounds of her sex had his eyes focusing on the door.

Ooh, yes...give it to me...

The bed was pretty sturdy so he couldn’t hear the bouncing of springs or the banging of a head board. What he could hear however was the sound of cheeks clapping back against who ever had the pleasure of beating that pussy up. A menacing look clouded Erik’s handsome face. He thought he would be able to persuade her tonight in sleeping with him since she was notorious for turning him on heavy.

“I hope this roommate situation doesn’t become a problem.”

Erik thought she was referring to keeping the place clean and respecting each others privacy but he didn’t expect her to be so...overly sexual and open. Walking around the apartment in crop tops and thongs, boxes of sex toys being delivered to the door and her opening them in the living room instead of the privacy of her own room. Showering with the door open knowing the shower door was full glass and he could see each and every curve she possessed. While Erik at first took it as her trying to seduce him, it’s actually just how she is. She’s comfortable enough to do those things and Erik wasn’t used to a woman being that way around him unless she was fucking him.

Y/N wasn’t fucking him. She didn’t even hint to wanting to fuck him. Now, Erik was sitting on the edge of his bed, taking in the sounds of her skin slapping against some other niggas skin. He wasn’t even saying shit. How could you fuck a bad bitch like Y/N and not even say anything? She was doing all the talking. Nasty little thing saying all the words Erik wished she would say to him.

You like the way I throw this phat ass on you?

Fuck my tight pussy, Daddy

You wanna cum? I can feel that fat dick pumping

Beat this pussy up, harder...louder....

“Isn’t your roommate home?”

Finally he speaks. He sounded so timid with the thought of Erik being home.

“So? You knew what you were getting into when you said you wanted some pussy. You still want this pussy, yeah?”

She sounded so fucking sexy. Erik closed his eyes as he listened to their conversation. There was no need in him ignoring them or denying he heard anything, all three of them knew he could hear.

“That’s it...that’s it...see? I knew-I knew you wanted this pussy...ohmigoddddd...

She could make a grown man cry with the way she talked. Erik tried to imagine how she looked taking some dick. He was blessed, most women saying he was too much to take and fit in their tight pussies but Y/N...the way she was handling it made him think she could bounce on this dick and take it like a grown woman, none of that little girl shit. She looked like the type to act like a little girl though, act all innocent and shy but deep down she was a certified dick pleaser who performed like a super freak for the biggest of dicks. Erik heard plenty of her conversations with her girls about the men she slept with. A slut, yes, but it didn’t turn Erik off. It made him want to see what she was about.

Once again, she never peruses Erik. They have small talk about school and work and whatever else besides sex that’s going on in their lives. If only she could show him what she was about at least once...

You see what you’re making this tight pussy do! I’m creaming all over you!!!!

Ffff-fuckkkkkk!!!!!

The clapping of her ass grew louder and louder, dudes grunts even harsher and animalistic as he pounded away in that juicy pussy. If only Erik could strain his ears further to make out the way her pussy sounded like being fucked. Did it sound like running water splashing? Was she a squirter? Did she grip the dick tighter when she was cumming? How did that arch look in her back?

He could feel his heavy dick pressing firm against his boxers. Her moans seemed to increase pitch by pitch and Erik had to clench his fists to stop himself from pumping his dick.

“Prepare yourself,” Erik whispers. He was tired of Y/N fine ass driving him crazy. When that nigga leaves he was gonna have a few words for her disrespectful ass. If she was gonna fuck in their home it was gonna be him not some other nigga.

“Damn, Y/N, I ain’t never see you cum like that. Fuck, you had me in here ready to risk it all for this good pussy.”

I think it’s time for that nigga to bounce, Erik thought to himself.

“I gotta leave?”

He sounded so disappointed. Yes, take your punk ass home. Letting Y/N lay all that good puss on you and you can’t even take it. Erik laid back in his bed, scrolling through Instagram to kill his erection but the sound of her giggling and sweet talk had him pausing to catch every word. Looks like he’s staying it seems. Erik was beyond heated. Throwing the covers back, Erik leaves, making sure to close his door extra hard. It was petty but then again she didn’t give a fuck that he was there.

“Chill out, you already licked my pussy clean..”

“Damn, my nigga really feeling himself.” Erik chuckles, settling on the living room couch and turning on some stupid shit, some late night cartoons. While Hey Arnold played in the background, Y/N’s bedroom door finally opens, the man of the hour stepping out with ruffled jeans and a rinkled black hoodie. Laces undone, he almost trips over his own feet walking down the hall and towards Erik’s direction. It took a lot of self control for Erik to focus on the 90s cartoon instead of the nigga who was fucking Y/N.

“Wassup, bro.”

Erik ignores the hello, eyes unblinking on the screen.

“Aye, my fault, man, I ain’t mean to keep you up like that. Y/N said it was cool.”

He just kept on talking, digging a deeper hole for himself. He must really want his face smashed in like a concrete bolder fell on his ass.

“Chill, leave Erik alone. He doesn’t like being disturbed while watching his cartoons.”

Her teasing voice is what made him turn around. She was playing entirely too much. Standing in the kitchen with a coffee mug in her hand, lavender silk robe open and showing him all those curves. The thong color tonight was black with pink lace and the sheer tank top showed him her dark areolas and large hard nipples. She sipped from her mug, eyes still on Erik as her late night booty call finally leaves, closing the door softly.

The staring contest continues, her big brown eyes trapping him. It was as if an unspoken knowledge of what he was feeling at the moment caught her attention.

“How was your night?” She asks, her honeyed tone sparking something deep within him.

“Like all other nights,” he raked his eyes from her white colored toes to the multicolored box braids she had in her hair.

“So why keep going to the club if it’s so tired?”

“To have something to do I guess...”

Y/N finishes her tea, placing the mug on the counter. She didn’t come anywhere near Erik, but she did make sure he saw every inch of her body through that open robe.

“...tell me if I’m becoming a pain to live with...you’ll tell me, right?”

“You’re not a pain...just hard headed that’s all.”

“What?” She smiled.

“You’re just mad disrespectful that’s all. I can handle living with you. It’s just you need a firm hand.”

The sparkle in her eyes made Erik’s chest grow tight. It was as if she wanted him to say that to her.

“I like discipline.”

Watching her in that moment, made all of Erik’s thoughts and feelings towards her shower her. She took in a slight breath, the sound music to his ears. Erik was ready to spread her wide and dig into her deep.

“Oh yeah? How you like to be punished?”

Y/N sauntered over to him, standing between his open legs. The glow from the TV screen created a halo around her. She looked at his lap, her hands patting her thighs.

“I like to be spanked.”

“You are a fucking slut.”

Erik turned off the TV.

“You are a slutty little thing. Didn’t you just get fucked in that good puss? Now you want to be spanked? Fuck, girl.”

“I told you, I like to be punished. Punish me for fucking while you were home. Show me...”

[lady-byleth]

i can’t remember but i’m pretty sure it’s your account. i know you went by a different url with ladysomething lol but my mind cannot remmeber but anyway—

I AM so glad that i followed you when tales of vesperia was a huge thing again. kinda. well as big as it could get at the time. and then fire emblem. and rwby? and now genshin 🥺 i could be mixing you up with someone else but like. IM PRETTY SURE ITS YOU.

and i always appreciate everything you say cus i always feel dumb or like i’m the odd one out?

i really really like lumine and it wasn’t until i went digging around in the genshin fandom to see people shit on her and i went :/ even some people i know don’t like her and prefer aether even though they both have the same role when chosen as the traveler. i just think she’s really cute and really vibe with her as the MC! and i really agree with the aspect that we don’t see female mcs much in stories like these. and in any official promos, like all that glitters trailer, it’s always aether as the main.

anyway if i’m confusing you with another user in regards sbout the fandoms you were in ignore me and i will forever be embarrassed

Ahaha im pretty sure you've got the right person, being lady-something is my brand (*wink wink*) and I did in fact get really invested in all those fandoms at some point

And man, it's super nice to hear that! I always just say what comes to mind at the moment, I write my thoughts down and then post them, so I'm really glad it resonates with people

I like Lumine a lot too, she's adorable and is voiced by one of my favorite voice actresses in Japanese (which is why I chose that voice track in the first place) and really, if I get the option to play as a female MC I will always go for that cuz it's rare enough.

Lumine gets snubbed by marketing so badly, it's almost like they forget she exists, even though story wise there's absolutely no difference between her and Aether. It's like that time with Assassin's Creed Odyssey where Alexios got most of the focus despite not even being the canon protagonist, or in basically every other video game ever

Finding fantasy stories with a female protagonist who is canon is basically impossible so it pisses me off to no end when people can't see beyond the tip of their nose and maybe realize that insulting people who just want to have a good time playing as a girl is maybe a shitty thing to do

Yall aren't helping at all

Hell I've even had people say to me that she doesn't make sense as the Traveler cuz she doesn't look like one! Their reasoning? Her clothes are white and she wears heels. Aether wears a fucking crop top, people. And they used to have wings and could travel across dimensions, appropriate fashion wasn't really their main concern.

It's just...this irrational hatred for female main characters is deeply ingrained into fandoms and they'll find the dumbest excuses to justify it. And I'm stubborn enough to call them out on it whenever I can.

But enough of that, before this becomes a rant post xD really, honestly, super duper thank you for this message, I'm really grateful to you for telling me this and being around for so long

I appreciate you very much!

[charmed-asylum]

👨‍🍳#𝓕𝓞𝓞𝓓𝓲𝓔👨‍🍳

Summary: Something happening in Easter Hills. Something that effecting everyone under the surface. Could this just be a phase a trick that no one can shack off? Is this something that will pass with another or can we all be heading for destruction

Declaimer: #Foodie has some curse words, blood,cat fight, mentions of bullying and eating disorder. Also, I do have dyslexia who happens to do her own proof reading so be easy with me!!! 

A/N: This chapter is a filler before things start to go to shit in the next one. Let me know what you think or want to be added to the tag list. xoxo Tia

MASTER LIST // Previous CHAPTER 2

Tagged: @weapinggwillowss​ @kittykatlow​ @alagalaska @deansblackbeauty​ 

The journey to school was a blur. I don’t know how or by what grace of god but I made it come Monday. It has been one hell of a week but that be an understatement. In reality, it wasn’t just this week it was these last month or so. I tap my number two pencil a few times against the desk waiting for my name to be called. Ms. King was an older lady full proud of the fact she been teaching since 1968. While it was an achievement to the only thing she to show was  13 cats waiting for her at home. The simple 10 minutes routine took her much longer and left us 20 minutes to cramp everything in. Today this lovely dry hot day was pushing 22 minutes. Taking a deep breath I look away from the heart diagram and look up to see what was taking so long. Class of normally 27 students was a minor fraction of 18 if that. I would think nothing of it but as I chew on the nasty no taste but death eraser it hit me. It was the same thing for all my other class different students were missing, I heard principal Ratchet mention the flu or mono. Just did not feel right.

Eraser still hanging from my mouth as I think of that day. Mind rush back to sitting in the back of the ambulance. Flashing blue and red light blur my vision only clear thing was KP looking like a superhero. His huge rough hands play in his hair as he let a huge breath out from his chiseled chest. Eyes darting back from the black bag and the sheriff. I was gonna speak but KP knows what is best and having me talk wasn’t it. Men stuck in his ways talking to the freak was never useful. The only words that came from his mouth addressed to me were,” Second time in a month you got something going on with you and these damn woods. You doing some witchcraft or something. Weird girl”. I chuckled under my breath at the joke he was. But he was right two times in a month this time I’m alone. No parents no reassurance. Blood mix with the dirt covers most of my clothes. KP didn’t mention much just that we saw the body out of nowhere. Not that it was still alive barley but alive not that it said anything just that it was dead when he checked. The next thing I remember was me in the bathtub still in my clothes as he cleans me off. Water was mix with soap water and dirt. I practically begged him to stay not to leave with tears rolling down my cheeks eyes red with fear and pain. With a kiss on the crown of my head, he promises me before carrying me to bed. We lay snuggled together his hands holding me tightly his hands and mine laying close to my heart. By the time the rosters call to wake up the night creatures, he was gone.

Bell took me out of my mind back into reality. Slowly grabbing my thing I rush out to my locker to see if Janet picks up the note I left. Peaking over my shoulder I shield myself as I put in her combo. With a tap it open with the note still there. SHIT JANET. Besides the creepy 3 words messages, I haven’t heard from her. Just had to focus today thing on Janet.

Corner of my eye I could see few people going towards the cafeteria. I swing my bag over my shoulder and ran off to the cafeteria. Even though my lunch period was for another two periods. Pushing through the sea of people looking for her. Crazy how classrooms were getting more and more empty but the cafeteria was getting more and more crowded. Pushing people who were waiting on the growing line to get food I look around for Janet. She has been having lunch during this period and her regular one with me for a month. Turning shoulders calling she was nowhere. FUCK.

My fresh white polish nails comb through my hair as I tried to remain calm. Closing my eyes I pray to the lords for help a sign. Anything to prove  I’m not losing it once again. As I started to relax I could hear a noise a voice. Looking up I thank god before following the voice. Now before I explain to you what saw a person should know in this school I’m a freak I’m okay with it, I accept it, I celebrate my flawless in the eye of my peers. One of many things is my strict unorthodox eating habits. I have been called every word in every dictionary. Something I never wanna contribute to, Tiffany though is a 500 calories a day type of girl. Once someone gave her a regular coke and she beat the poor freshman right to ER. She screams Malibu Barbie with matching purse. Flawless. She Janet’s level flawless just with an eating disorder. This Tiffany if it wasn’t for the 5,000 purses and that annoying voice, this girl looks nothing like her. First, it was the fact all my years of knowing her she only wears a crop top and thong poking out now in size large sweater with purple unicorns and leggings, that she probably got from the local theft shop in town. I almost piss myself. Then was her plate. The fact she had a plate was a shocker.  She had two things of chili fries, a sloppy Joe, and three pudding cups. Sipping from a BIG BOY slushie from the gas station down the road. Unknown to me I was currently in front of her table mouth open till one of her minions toss a fry at me.

“ Tiffany. Hey huh, Tiff” I said still unsure.

If I was shocked before when she turned to me made me beyond doubt stun. She had a ton of acne and her face look a bit puffy from her skeleton skin-tight face not so long ago.

“ What do you want? “ One of her minions ask as she was chewing on some sour union flavor chips.

“ Have you seen. Janet today? We got a project due tomorrow and I can’t find her” I said spit balling as went on.

They look at each other and giggle. Tiffany looks at the other and like that her mood change she sat up a bit more and turn to fully look at me. With her stain shirt and food on the corner of her mouth. She looks at me with hungry in her eyes with a quick lick around her smug lipstick lips grind at me.

“ Actually no we haven’t but we were gonna look for her. Hey, you got any Trippie on you” Tiffany said with joy and lust in those hazel eyes.

Step back and put a hand to my hip. I look at her as she waited for my answer. This gosh darn drug again. The reason why I and Janet been at odds, to begin with.

“ No. I don’t take that stuff. Tried Popi. She the one who had it in the 1st place. You haven’t seen her she usually here with you during lunch” I pressed. Look of doubt of cross all four girls face. Who was spotting a similar appearance to their leader?

“ Come on. Smith your join to the fuckin hip. You must know where we can find her or some of the drugs. We ran out quicker then we wanted to. Takes longer to get it up. Help us. We do anything. Tell Janet we are willing to do anything “ Zoe said grabbing tight to my wrist. Her grip was airtight that I felt the pressure. Almost like how it was with Janet that last time. Same look in the eyes too.

Pulling away from her grip with all my might I stumble back. I look at the girls as their expressions started to change to a dead zone look in their eyes. Like they were on something. My mouth became dry my brain ache from thoughts that were running through my head. My eyes darted from one to another to another.

“ Lik-”

Tiffany ignore me and started to laugh after taking a few more bites of her sandwich. Drops of it left on her shirt one just by the corner of her mouth.

“ She not gonna tell us. She wants it all to her self. It’s fine we figure it out we are not selfish people” Tiffany said laughing between each chew. I clench my jaw till I felt something swooshing in my mouth a bitter taste.

“ Like I said. I don’t take that stuff. I care what goes in my body and I don’t trust it” I said before turning to leave. I got a few steps in before I heard more laughter. I stop and chuckle to myself what was so funny. Sound like she was mumbling something. “Excuse me” I said turning back around.

“ You know what. Why did I even ask you? Face it. Without that candy eye boy toy or your American pie girlfriend you nothing but a fuckin virgin who can even drive. Your nothing only thing you were made to do was to worship and praise others. Look at you Janet doesn’t give you any attention finally realize what dead weight you are and left you. I bet it hurts knowing that you are nothing. EVERYONE LEAVES YOU. But you are one thing. Very good at if I may say. Being a pathetic bitch. Roof roof” Tiffany said with a smile on her face and a wheeze of a laugh. I hated her I know I should not but I did. Hated that she was mostly right I hate that I let this get to me and most of all I hated I was entertaining it. It was too late I felt the tears in my eyes. So I did the only thing left to do and that was to mirror her. Show who she was I am good at pretending so much so I don’t know if my mind grew up with my body.

“ Funny you say that. Because the only thing I see is a bunch of mystery meat slops of shit. Yeah, you almost was right but you forgot about one thing. Tiffany, I’m not someone bitch I am the mother fucking  animal control. I round up all those rodents pest and I put them down. Don’t test me, ugly soul. Because next time I put you down maybe just maybe finally allow your groupies some air to think for once” I said got closer to her till I was nose to nose.

Taking my thumb I gently clean her of the sloppy Joe that settles on the corner of her mouth before rubbing it on her shoulder. A smile with victory as she remains silent from my death stare. Lips cover in raspberry flavor organic lip-gloss roll off a bit from my tongue as I move it across. Stepping back I flip up my middle finger high in the air and turn around probably too quick because next thing I know something pulls me close and punches me square in the face knocking me slow motion down to the ground. Light flicker a bit before with rainbows and glitter before it all fades to black.

Drips of water fell down my forehead. The buzzing was the first thing that caught my attention, the buzz from a circle ceiling light with a cool white tent. Buzz hypnotize me Mumbling back noise stop but my eyes remained on a poor dead fly t stuck in the filter.

" Oh, Ms. Smith you awake. That was a nasty fall. I will be back in a second" Nurse Jane called out.

The nurse’s office like this fly in a black hole stuck in the 1950s with a wall of fame for Nurse Jane prize dog. Yup, Mr. Fuzzy Bear. Elvis Presley played in the background. I look at the wall  Mr. Fuzzy Bear look completely different then dog I saw a few weeks ago. Tap on the shoulder shocks me to the core as I scream out and throw the now baggie of water into the floor by my converse. Hands shake with fear my breathing getting shorter as I hold onto the wall of trophies. Trying and failing to catch my breath. Another tap sent me to the floor crawling to the corner covering my ears and tried to control my breathing.

" Oh, I'm sorry. Ms. Smith. I was seeing if you were okay. Sit here let me get you some water" Nurse Jane said. I could smell whiskey on her breath as she spoke to me. Mix with the cheap drug store perfume they sale but no one brought due to the reaction most got.

Looking up I watch as she walks off. She had far to much hair spray that perfect her scoop with a white daisy in her hair and the white long sleeve white nurse uniform. My eyes went back to the daisy I study flowers out of boredom and that one something was off. Slowly getting to my feet I follow her to the front till I stop and see the puddle I felt. CRAB CAKES I said to myself as I got on my knees to clean up my mess.

“ That’s a new daisy huh Mrs. Cruise. Might need to clip a few and add it to the garden” I said

“ Oh, this little old thing. My little boy was playing out in the fields and found some. Next to this strange patch of grass. Probably weed. Anyway, it was the prettiest thing I have seen had to cut one of myself. But don’t let your self eat it. My poor baby eats some and well that how he ends up going to see you” She said handing out a can for the trash.

“ How is little guy anyway. Not eating any more chocolate or flowers I hope” I asked dusting off my rip denim jeans.

She looks at me strange her head tilt to the side hair staying in place. A huge grind plaster on that clown-like makeup face.

“ Smith. My baby has been with you all this week. I took my little fuzzy home and he started to act like he was from the wild. Brought him back so the good lord of a doctor can make him all better” Jane said.

I wanted to laugh because last I check he wasn’t there. Words stayed at top of my tongue. My eyes dart to her and the wall of trophies back to her.

“ Oh yeah. Ethan got hurt had to get someone over from next town over. Sure he is back to the cute button he always is in no time. If I may ask because well new doc might make a fuss where was this planet at” I asked.

“ Well, I was on my daily work out power walk so mmmm somewhere by the old wooden bridge in Lovers. Such a pretty sight” Jane said. Before I can speak the phone rang. I slipped out as she turns to answer it.

I look in my hand was the white tissue with the daisy I snatch off of her. Something was off. Maybe if Janet didn’t want to tell me I figure it out myself. Something was wrong and I attend to figure it out one way or another. The first stop was to work.

Most don’t know because my family likes to keep it hush back before Ethan came into town my dad family own Easter Hills Animal Hospital for over 60 years. Still does as a private owner. Ethan was like the fun aunt and each time I had nowhere to go she would sit me on the desk and teach me things. The first animal I cut open was a raccoon at the age of 7 with Ethan of course helping me every step of the way.

Lights in the hallway were dim fluorescent lights. With my phone in my hand, I tap on the flashlight and slowly walk into the back. Maybe I can check a few of the animals and the daisy I snatch to see if anything was similar. BING BING I glance down to my notifications to see a text from KP. Asking me if I am okay. I cared about him but there was too much at state. I need to know. Call it a hunch.

It smells like trash and cleaning supplies for some reason. Like the hardcore, stuff police use to clean a crime scene. I should know each night I clean the operation rooms and front area. The stuff we use was the general store brand. And it smells and looks too perfect. The new vet hasn’t arrived yet, so who did this? The keys dangle from my left hand hitting me as I walk down to the back where the files would be at. I just had to check to see if the dog was still here. As I got close something wasn’t right. There was a brand new lock on the door. I was here not so long ago this heavy-duty lock wasn’t here. Clipping the keys to my hip I glance around before I tried to jiggle at the lock. No luck. Looking around I tried to think on my feet. Shit. Lending against the wall  I see a light on in Ethan office. Alright, that can work. Pocketing my phone in my back pocket. I sneak into her office.

The walls were cover in wine red wallpaper with cherry dark chocolate wood floors. Her office looks nothing like the one you would assume a veterinarian office would look like. Everything from the desk to the chairs was expensive something Ethan insisted. There was a black bookshelf that lay against the wall with matching black gold nods desk. Chairs that were a whopping 2,000 each sat perfectly insight. Awards plastered on another wall with pictures of her many accomplishments. She looks print-ready perfect. Along with all her pictures was one in the corner row of her with my parents when I was younger. I remember that day like it was yesterday. The first day she started almost 10 years ago. She had a short boy cut with dyed blonde hair that made her features pop. I didn’t know much about beauty but she and my mother are what I imagine. Most look at Mona Lisa or Marvel statue for reference me I had two prime examples just for myself to see each day. Kinda like what I felt when I saw KP for 1st time 6 years ago. For so many years  I was lost in the woods unable in away to find my way home. At first, it was Ethan and Janet who hold me close then shortly KP. 

A loud bing drum though my ears. Clinching onto my ears I start to breathe again. Calming myself before I slip again. I had to focus. My eyes gaze to the computer. Ethan was many things but OCD was one. She always had copies full of details. I couldn’t get into the back room but maybe this could work. I rush over almost knocking over a picture of Ethan's two older daughters to the desk. Shaking the mouse I wait till the computer comes alive. My left hand cradling my face biting my thumbnail. Taste is nail polish with taste funny but I chew and spit it out without thought. CRAP. Password. Taking my hand away I tap the keyboard. It could be an endless list of it could be one. Sitting back in the plush comfy desk chair lean back and rock back and forth. Great way to putting all those AP and college courses to good use I thought to myself. Tapping my sneakers against the wood floor I loosen my messy bun and run my fingers through my hair. My ring KP gave me tangle through my hair. I stop thinking and reach to type something in quickly. WINE. Nope, crap. Pulling out the draws I look around for something. A hint clue maybe like many older people password somewhere.

While her office was perfect these draws were nothing like it may be the OCD part was probably the wrong word. It had five draws: 1st had simple office supplies and a pill bottle of viagra, 2nd had appointment book and business card old open bag of photo chips, 3rd had a prepaid phone, key to the safe, and thing of condoms. 4th one had a bottle of cheap whiskey, two glasses, and a few files full of pictures and post it’s. The draw in the center didn’t budge. Feeling around the smooth polish surface I felt something off. Stretching down a bit more I felt it. A huge grin spread across my face as I grab and quickly tried to open the back door with it. Still, it did not budge. Running back I did not see the front door was wide open letting in a cool breeze. Driven by excited I tried for the desk draw and heard a click. Opening it. I saw a phone book and a journal and right on the front corner in a bright pink post-it was the password: 2HOT4THISISH. 

My laughter was cut short when I heard heavy foot shuffling outside the crack door. I pause and tried to figure my next move. With my eyes on the door, I quickly shove the papers from the files in my bag. The journal replacing it with a book another that was on the table and putting everything back to what it was. Before I could slip out the door open with a loud creak sound. Panic took over and I quickly bundled tight under the desk with my legs squeeze tight to my chest a gentle rock not make a sound. I could hear wheezing. My eyes were full of tears as I tried not to panic. Who could it be? My eyes drift off to the side and I could see a pair of Black Jimmy Choo nearly 3 feet from my hand. I quickly move it and watch the shoes. It was there for another 10 maybe 15 minutes before I heard a rattle of keys and shoes walk away. Towards the end hallway I heard some more noise but this time it was from the back door I tried to open earlier. Whoever it was the person did whatever to the lock.

I jolt awake from the sound of my phone going off. I glanced down to see it was KP. And it was going at 11 o’clock. Fudge I slowly got up from the floor and sat in the chair.

“ Hey baby I’m so sorry I got lost in my work and fell asleep” I said rubbing my eyes.

I could hear a deep breath in and I could imagine he was rubbing his forehead with a thick strong finger.

“ Sweetie. You had me worried. I had to hear from someone else you got in a fight with that toothpick girl. Tiffany something. Why didn’t you call me” he asked with a bit ignored.

I look around at the office and back at the computer it was still on. I rest the phone in the crook of my neck and type in the password.

“ I know I didn’t want you to worry. I’m sorry. I should have told you. Do you wanna snuggle tonight Phillip. We can snuggle and I can give you kitty licks or something” I said trying to get him to lighten up. The home screen came up. There was normal stuff internet, virus protection filed, a few others. As I waited I click on to each and look to see what I can find.

“ Oh really. You know I love your kitty licks Issac. I gotta stay in late today probably till about 2 in the morning. But I can still come over. For some snuggle, if the offer still open” KP tease.

My smile drops when I saw something I didn’t mean to click. It had pictures and pdf of things I never have seen before. I hold the clicker to print everything out.

“ Of course. You know where the key is. Just bring some milk if you come. Mr. Cereal cruncher uses the last bit the other day” I said with a giggle.

“ Will do. Sorry I been distant. Perks of small ass town are not many folks to call if there a crisis. I never get how a town of 203 people can have a police unit of 12 people which includes the old man club who just sleeps in the police car. One day this mentality gonna bit them in the ass baby. Baby are you still there” KP asked.

I wasn’t listening but instead reading what I found. It was my reports I send for. For the drug, dog, and something unknown. I glance at the date and it was of a few days ago. Each had this strange code at the end of each page.

“ I’m sorry about that honey. You know this town stuck in time. I know things are hectic with you. I wish I could make it perfect like the way you are. But I can only be your snuggle bunny and talk to you and be here for you” I said packing my bag and looking some more.

“ That’s all I ask for baby. My beautiful snuggle bunny. God your -“ KP stop talking and shot out to someone. “ Huh. I gotta go another fuck up animal. Just pop up by lover lane” KP said disappointed.

“ It’s okay. Hey, hasn’t it been a lot of that lately? We don’t get those anymore. You cheating on me with another animal lover” I teased. It was silent only I could hear was a deep breath from the other line.

“ I am joking. I’m gonna be wearing your favorite plaid shirt to sleep. I love you. Stay safe for me please” I said in a mouse-like whisper.

I need this stuff. Looking in my bag I pull out my key chain for my USB drive. I looked around before plugin it in and copying all the files. As it got to 100% I quickly unplugged it and fix everything to was before I came. My bike was a half-mile away hiding behind trees and some branches. Midnight sky dance high. Times like this I would stop and lay on the road and look up now I’m filled with this void. This feeling was creeping from the corner of my eyesight. Feeling of claws pulling at your flesh. Ahead I could see some birds flying south. A huge flock like it was on my date. They always know I wish I could just have left with KP and not look back. Even with that would I be escaping the danger or welcoming another.

I sat Indian style on the floor with a pencil in my bun and a yellow highlighter in my mouth. Looking over the papers and files scattered across. The more I read more I could tell something wasn’t right.

“ Baby why are you up ?” a voice said for behind me. I jump up almost choking on the highlighter falling in the papers behind me.

KP stood tall with his sleeve rolled up to show his god-like muscle hairstyle slick back looking like a Ken doll.

“ Sorry homework” I said looking up to him. He chuckled and bend down on one knee to get a better look at me. He took my hand and slowly help me up in. I could smell the coffee from his breath mix with some gum. He smokes even though I told him how much I hated it. More he smokes a brand that not even available anymore. Which made me madder at the money he spent.

“ You know you keep it up with the donuts and cigarettes your not gonna be able to promise me that forever. Mister” I said with a bent brow at him.

With a finger, he played with my hair a bit before meeting my eyes. Sweet sparkle that makes anyone weak to the knees and a smile to match. Coming closer he kisses me with such hunger. I reach for the back of his neck to help me out as I deepen the kiss. Til I taste the cigarette and stop.

“ No kisses till you brush your teeth. Yucky “ I giggle in his neck. My hands still playing with his neck hair. His hands move further down my back till it reaches my rear.

“ But I’m sleepy. I don’t wanna. You said you are my snuggle bunny” He said with his puppy eyes. I hit his rock hard chest playfully before pushing myself backs away from him laying on top of the papers so he couldn't see it.

“ And we will when you brush your teeth. Or you can quite” I said with a fake shock face.

He laughs and walks to the bathroom join to my bedroom. I turn to watch as he walks off. God his butt was a thing of beauty.

“ What type of work are you doing “ He asked from the bathroom.

I slowly got up when I heard the water and quickly move all the papers and shove them in my bag.

“ Research paper for history. You know how Mr. Burns is a pain in my buttocks “ I said checking around for anything else.

KP wall out with a mouth full of mouthwash gave me his serious look. I walk over to a bin under my bed full of some clothes for him and toss him over some sweatpants. Getting under my blankets I waited for him to come out. My cell started to ring from my bedside table. Reaching for it I answered it and walk out to the hallway.

“ Janet is that you. God, I have been worried” I whisper into the phone. Nothing.

“ I forgot you quite. Tiffany came at me looking for you. Be proud I told her off” I laughed. Still nothing.

“ If you are in trouble I can help. And hey if it’s something legal then fuck it. You are my friend I can talk to KP. He here..hello” the phone click and I heard a dial tone.

“ Who was that” KP asked standing in the doorway arms cross over each other.

“ Janet. She has been calling and saying nothing. I’m worried “ I said looking up to him. He pushes himself off and wrap his arms around me and squeeze me tight. Tears fell onto his bare chest.

Master of Puppets began to blur though the tiny radio. Fiddling around I press onto the snooze buttons. KP was still sound asleep with his arms wrap around my small of my abdomen. Head in the crook of my neck snoring. I glance back and kiss his forehead smiling. The clock read blink 6:03. Taking his hand I slowly ease myself out of the embrace and out of bed. He snuggled into my pillow and started to snore once more. Flipping my alarm off grab my outfit I had plan night before and headed into the bathroom.

It still early so I decide to open the windows to let some fresh air in. After a few minutes, I hop in. I scrub some shampoo in my hair and hum this morning song to myself. I reach back and let the water hit my face run down to the rest of my body. Taking the dirt and worried away. A cheep cheep stops me as I tried to figure out what it was taking out last bit of conditioner. I felt something coming around me then more cheep cheep. I wipe my eyes to my surprise I saw a bird no five maybe more in the shower with me. I tried to move but more I did more they attack me two in my hair other hitting me with its wings. My breathing started to fall short as panic set it. I tried not to scream thinking to all the safety videos I would watch growing up but it didn’t work. I tried pushing away shooing them but still nothing. The anxiety got so bad that after trying to hold it in I scream. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. They kept attacking me this time pecking me over and over. Taking my hands I tried to push then away. Still, they came after me. I grab for the shower curtain tight trying to find some escape. AHHHHHHHHHHHHELP. With one last scream, the curtain I was holding onto with my dear life suddenly gave. Suddenly everything faded to black. The only thing I could hear was the birds still chirping. 

[kirimono]

bnha secret identity au

a while back (like over a year ago) some friends and i were talking about a bnha au where theyre more classic Teen Superheroes With Secret Identities. that chatlog is under the cut.

ShriekingSisterhood

BAKUGO WOULD NEVER COMPLIMENT AN HERO BESIDES HIMSELF, EVEN IF HIS IDENTITY WAS SECRET

dataghost

lmfao yeah

cassetticon

bakugous identity would only be secret for like 5 minutes

starsinger

jsdfidksbgj

fuck

ShriekingSisterhood

Someone: Idk ingenium is kinda shit

starsinger

thats. reayyly funny to contemplate actually

cassetticon

"WOW KING OF EXPLODOKILLS WHOS THAT SOUNDS LIKEA  COOL GUY"

dataghost

exactly like the end of iron man

ShriekingSisterhood

Bakugo emerging from a nearby dumpster: ye totally but you know whos the fucking coolest LORD EXPLOSION MURDE

cassetticon

yeah

ShriekingSisterhood

In secred id au everyone knows bakugos id

not even bc he bragged about it or anything hes just his own #1 fan

cassetticon

yeah

starsinger

also he cant hide his hair

ShriekingSisterhood

WHAT IF HIS CITIZEN DISGUIZE IS HIS BEST JEANIST HAIR

cassetticon

holy fuck

dataghost

god hed just be. dead inside

ShriekingSisterhood

oh god, oh man, okay this might be dilly but

everyone in secret id au knows bakugo is lord explosion murder

)drmatic pause, lifts finger for effect)

except kirishima

cassetticon

WOW

starsinger

aughdshfjdfsdgh

cassetticon

YEAH,

ShriekingSisterhood

who  is so fucking cursed

THAT HE HAS A CRUSH ON BOTH OF THEM

dataghost

oh nooooooooo

starsinger

HHAHAHAHAHAH OH NOOOOOOOO

ShriekingSisterhood

WITHOUT EVEN KNOWING THEY ARE THE SAME AWFUL BOY

starsinger

EYAYHH

cassetticon

SCREAMS

ShriekingSisterhood

Kirishima to his jock pal Uravity: I dunno like I like both of them so much like, I can't figure out which one to like, ask to punch me??

cassetticon

jesus

starsinger

haugh.

dataghost

god unfortch

cassetticon

ochako is trying very hard to figure out how to tell him

ShriekingSisterhood

Kirishima: it's impossible to choose between them

dataghost

man bakugou is like . barely even disguised in his costume

and kirishima still has no clue

cassetticon

yeah thats the best part

ShriekingSisterhood

Kirishima: I love them both equally but for different reasons

starsinger

spiff this is the worst

i love it

ShriekingSisterhood

EVEN ZAP BOY KNOWS

BUT NOT KIRISHIMA

starsinger

god. i want to see the HIJINKS

cassetticon

same. god

ShriekingSisterhood

bonus points if Bakugo honestly believes he has most people fooled

starsinger

kirishima accidentally schedules a study date with bakugou at the same time red riot has a training session with king of explodokills

ShriekingSisterhood

FUCK

cassetticon

screams

starsinger

i dont know how this happens. i could see kirishima doing it but i feel like bakugou keeps better track of his schedule than that but

cassetticon

i mean bakugou is also under the curse's thrall

dataghost

wait so does bakugou know kirishima is red riot

starsinger

did he get........... Flustered

ShriekingSisterhood

omg

starsinger

its funnier if no i think

but

ShriekingSisterhood

he got flustered

dataghost

i feel like bakugou knows like no one's secret identities because he just doesnt fucking care

starsinger

yeah

ShriekingSisterhood

MAYBE HE THOUGHT KIRISHIMA WAS DOING IT ON PURPOSE

cassetticon

yeah

thats good

@ jane

ShriekingSisterhood

oh no i like that much better

he doesn't even fucking know

cassetticon

kirishima might be the only exception tho just bc of how obnoxious he is in and out of costume

ShriekingSisterhood

the only one he knows is deku and he hates that he knows it

cassetticon

wow yeah

ShriekingSisterhood

hes constantly trying to unknow it

dataghost

god

starsinger

wheich is really funny because, again, theres not even a DISGUISE COMPONENT to kirishimas costume

cassetticon

YEAH

HIS WHOLE FACE AND TORSO IS JUST OUT THERE

starsinger

YEAH FJKDFKJKJFD

ShriekingSisterhood

HIS ABS, OUT THERE

dataghost

okay i feel like in a real secret id au they would put SOME more efffort,

maybe he has a mask

cassetticon

i Guess so

but thats not as funy

ShriekingSisterhood

what if bakugo thinks tetsu tetsu is red riot

dataghost

but the abs are still Exposed

sdfllkfdajslkjsfdjlkfdsjlsfdl;kj

cassetticon

holy fuck

ShriekingSisterhood

bc he can't be assed to tell the hard boys apart

starsinger

bakugou finally figures it out when he finally sees kirishima shirtless when theyre at the gym

cassetticon

SCREAMS

ShriekingSisterhood

FUCK!!!

THIS IS THAT GOOD SHIT!!

cassetticon

HED KNOW THOSE ABS ANYWHERE

ShriekingSisterhood

BAKUGO GLANCING OVER AT HIS BRO WHILE THEY DO SOME CURLS IN THE GYM AND HIS CROP TOP RIDES UP AND BAKUGO'S WATER BOTTLE INSTANTLY BOILS AND EXPLODES

RIGHT IN HIS HAND

starsinger

i think the concept of 'its a secret identity au but that just means they slap a tiny domino mask on but it somehow works' is great. but so is the concept of 'they have their canon costumes with no fuckgin disguise components whatsoever but none of them know ANYWAY'

also concept tho: kirishima's superhero costume is his old emo makeup

dataghost

he just starts yelling at kirishima immediately and kirishima is just like "keep it DOWN we're in a PUBLIC GYM!!!! its supposed to be a secret!!!!! :("

ShriekingSisterhood

HFGDFH

cassetticon

holy shit vera

i love this

ShriekingSisterhood

okay but what if bakugo is like "if kirishima is red riot then he obviously figured out my secret identity way before all this"

cassetticon

i love ex-emogoth kirishima

starsinger

aAaaAAAHAHGHGH

cassetticon

OHHHH MY GOD

BAKUGOU JUST TAKES IT AS A GIVEN THAT KIRISHIMA KNWOS

ShriekingSisterhood

"How did he outsmart me, how did he figure it out"

KIRISHIMA DOESN'T KNOW A FUCKING THING MY GUY

dataghost

god what if bakugou assumes like. kirishima was doing study dates & stuff with him BECAUSE of his secret identity

starsinger

ghhh OD

ShriekingSisterhood

YEAH

cassetticon

im dying of thks

ShriekingSisterhood

"HE WAS SENDING ME A MESSAGE?? WAS IT A THREAT? A CHALLENGE"

starsinger

this is so ooo oo good

ShriekingSisterhood

NO, THIS HARD BOY IS JUST, A BIG MESS

OH MY GOD

WHAT IF,

kirishima: fuck now that bakugo knows im red riot what if he sees me flirting with lord explosion murder and gets pissed

dataghost

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

cassetticon

screams

starsinger

hhfdhdhfhfhHDFHFDHFHDHDFHDF

he stops flirting with lord explosion murder so much and bakugous like

pissed

ShriekingSisterhood

THE BOY IS SIMPLY TOO CURSED TO LIVE

cassetticon

god. yeah

bakugou: hes playing me like a fool again(edited)

dataghost

i mean we're assuming bakugou noticed the flirting in the first place

ShriekingSisterhood

kirishima, meanwhile a 100% genuine no playing about it fool ass fool

fuck, since bakugo thinks all interraction is rivalry

maybe he thinks like, kirishima  no longer considers him an opponent or something??

cassetticon

oh. my god

yeah.

starsinger

yah its something like that

cassetticon

"you think youre too good for me now huh"

ShriekingSisterhood

so his pride is hurt, and also the deep subconscious tender part of him thats gay is hurt too

starsinger

he cant quite articulate his actual feelings hes just like

Pissed

dataghost

yeah

ShriekingSisterhood

Kirishima: (stops flirting)

Bakugo: I don't know what this is but i know how i feel about it: furious beyond articulation

starsinger

god i just thought about tsuyu for a second and im fdjkfdjfd

shes just a frog

ShriekingSisterhood

god,

starsinger

in both civilian and superhero forms. but its liek. no one thinks its weird

ShriekingSisterhood

good

dataghost

yeah sometimes youre just a frog, nbd

doesnt necessarily have anything to do with you being Popular Hero Froppy, nope

ShriekingSisterhood

sometimes 2 people are just frogs and that doesn't mean anything

maybe people assume tsuyu got into being a frog bc she likes Froppy

dataghost

just unrelatedly, frogs

starsinger

yeah! exactly

oh my god spiff

ShriekingSisterhood

and shes like (internally flustered) KERO

maybe its just like how there are, horse girls and dolphin girls in ever high school

dataghost

are you implying horse girls and dolphin girls are literally part horse & part dolphin in the bnha universe

ShriekingSisterhood

Is there are reason for them not to be

HEY THO... WHAT ABOUT THE BNHA STUDENTS LIKE GOSSIPING SUSPICIOUSLY... ABOUT THE FACT THAT THEY NEVER SEE ALL MIGHT SENSEI IN HIS CIVILIAN FORM

like, assuming the teachers/adults are open abt their secret identities at the school

they're like "we've seen everyone out of hero mode except all might.... does he not have a civilian life"

Deku: (sweating)

dataghost

all might is extra secretive bc he's so like...."Gotta Be The Symbol Of Peace!!! No one can know i am a real human EVER!!!!!!"

ShriekingSisterhood

Student sees Greeblin Might like: "Oh are u that zombie hero"

yes but also in my head its that, they expect civilian all might to be buff

theres no extremely fucking unbelieably buff guy roaming the halls or in the teachers lounge or in town or anything

dataghost

yeah but even before his injury maybe he was like,

projected a super-super image like superman, like ~im not a civilian when im not heoring i live in My Special Secret Lair~ or soemthing

starsinger

god now im thinking about the logistics of this and its SO FUNNY that like every superhero in the entire town is at taht school. either as a teacher or as a student

dataghost

what if its not even a hero school

its just a regular ass school but everyone just HAPPENS to go there

starsinger

oh yeah like superman being like 'oh yeah i live in the fortress of solitude at the north pole'

YEAH EXACTLY

dataghost

yeah yeha

ShriekingSisterhood

oh my god

All Might: I live in a fortress of solitude in the alps and no once can see it with eyes

dataghost

all-might trying to live his civilian life pre-injury when he was always buff is so funny then tho

people keep asking him if he's all might and he's like no! look my hair doesnt stick up!

starsinger

KJFDJSDG

GOD

ShriekingSisterhood

All Might, ten minutes later: (buying milk at the local grocery  and fucking up the self checkout)

oh my god... secret buff all might is so good

its the superman glasses type effect

starsinger

'that cant be all might hes not smiling real big'

thats the extent of all mights acting skills

ShriekingSisterhood

maybe he gets a giant tshirt that says "pessimism" so no one can possibly identify him as a civillian

dataghost

sdaljkdjsakljlaksd

starsinger

akjsfjdjf

ShriekingSisterhood

"bad mood" t shirt

dataghost

i feel like he does a bunch of comics-type secret identity stuff to cover up his civilian id but its all super flimsy

like, obviously fake glasses, a shirt like that

maybe a fake mustache

starsinger

FDSDJKLFSDKJLKJL

NOOOOOO

cassetticon

and it all works

starsinger

ALL MIGHT WHIT A FAKE MUSTACHE IS AWFULLLL

dataghost

the glasses dont even have lenses theyre just a frame

cassetticon

he gets a mustache like mics bc he thinks its Cool

dataghost

its not even a blonde mustache. its like brown and OBVIOUSLY doesnt match his hair

everyone just assumes he dyes it

starsinger

he bought non-prescription glasses but one of the lenses got knocked out but he keeps wearing them

they have One Lens

dataghost

fsljdljdfs;jlfsd;

cassetticon

i love him

god

starsinger

m2

ShriekingSisterhood

what if the mustache is attached to the glasses like groucho style

dataghost

(i thought for a second about nighteye being one of the first outside the One For All lineage to know all might's civilian id and . augh)

starsinger

god i was like 'ok i have to think about todoroki now' but now i have feelings and im lie k. Put It Back :arrow_lower_left: dot jpeg

augh jane

ShriekingSisterhood

phantom of the opera shit

thats todoroki's hero disguise

dataghost

there's a fake nose on the glasses too and it barely fits overhis actual nose

ShriekingSisterhood

actually hes just covered half in ice

starsinger

oh nevermind i remembered his caonn hero costume is like

ShriekingSisterhood

so thats fine

starsinger

a plumber suit

dataghost

a plumber

starsinger

post sports arc

dataghost

what if thats his civilian job

and he just doesnt change clothesx

starsinger

gadhdhfg

noooo

ShriekingSisterhood

what civilian job does all might have

maybe he pretends to be gran torino's home health aid

starsinger

if eel like he Didnt Have One until meeting izuku. true to canon

dataghost

i was like "office job" but then realized i was literally just thinking of mr incredible at the beginning of the incredibles

starsinger

at which point he became an absolutely awful teacher

dataghost

o h noooo

starsinger

ghjdkfujfj

ShriekingSisterhood

god,,,m wow

what does he ever teach if its not a hero school

PHYS ED

dataghost

omfg

ShriekingSisterhood

HES THE SCRAWNIEST GYM TEACHER OF ALL TIME

dataghost

vjlgsdjkldfskljfsjsfj;kf;sdkjfsdkdsk;jflk

he gives GREAT inspirational speeches tho

starsinger

hujks FUK

ShriekingSisterhood

BUT LIKE AT THE SAME TIME, HE CAN LIKE LIFT AN ENTIER POMMEL HORSE WITH ONE HAND

god

what if they don't even have a sports team

so theres no games to give relevant inspirational speeches at

so hes just like, doing them at random

when he sees an in

dataghost

just at the beginning of each class

or whenever The Mood Strikes

question: is class 1b at the same school or are they Rival Schools

ShriekingSisterhood

fuck,,, both are so good

dataghost

imagine Rival School Student Monoma sneaking into their school to ~infiltrate~

ShriekingSisterhood

i like rival schools

because monoma like, steals their mascot

and kendo brings it back

dragging him over to apologise

but also i love the idea of him trying to infiltrate his own fucking school

starsinger

the concept of 'rival schools but aslo they dont have sports teams' is SOOO good

mathletes competitions get REAL intense

ShriekingSisterhood

just because A1 got the better homeroom classroom

and he wants it

oh my god intense matheletes

starsinger

science olympiad. band and choir competions.

cassetticon

MARCHING BAND AU IM HERE

ShriekingSisterhood

I WAS ABOUT TO SAY, LEE SUMMON

starsinger

ok whats the funniest sport to have if you can only have One Sport at ur school

ShriekingSisterhood

frisbee

starsinger

fall sport: ultimate frisbee

winter sport: fencing (? probably there is a funnier sport but ive got nostalgia)

spring sport: ultimate frisbee again

no

winter sport: ultimate frisbee... on ice

ShriekingSisterhood

fencing is too dignified is my concern

cassetticon

i love this concept

ShriekingSisterhood

YES

starsinger

eyah exactly spiff

ShriekingSisterhood

maybe winter sport was like curling

but no one liked it so they turned it into ice ultimate frisbee

starsinger

altho like. one time my friend spilled gatorade on the mesh of his mask and had to fence with gatorade on it and couldnt see shit

and won the bout

so

dignity is relativw

ShriekingSisterhood

wow, amazing,

OKAY BUT

TODOROKI KILLING IT AT ICE ULTIMATE FRISBEE

starsinger

HAHAHAHHAAHAHAGUHGHFDHJFD

cassetticon

WOW

starsinger

ok no

ShriekingSisterhood

BUT BEING LIKE MEDIOCRE IN THE FALL AND SPRING

starsinger

consider

ShriekingSisterhood

AND NO ONE CAN UNDERSTAND WHY

starsinger

todoroki.... being really disappointed

that curling isnt a thing anymore

ShriekingSisterhood

OH NO,,, HES BE SO GOOD AT IT....

his bitterness drives his ice frisbee prowess

starsinger

yeah not even using powers hes ujust like You Have To Understand The Ice

cassetticon

aw....

ShriekingSisterhood

the best thing about this is bakugo is so competitive that he'd join every sports even if it sucked just to win

starsinger

I Understand The Ice. and just not understanding why everone doesnt think curling is the best

ShriekingSisterhood

so bakugo is essentially Forced to play frisbee

cassetticon

yeah. god

ShriekingSisterhood

im crying.... ice understanding hand crusher

starsinger

i think hed be legit way into ultimate frisbee but fuckign hate ice frisbee but

play it anyway

he and todoroki were like the only people on the curling team and bakugou was AWFUL at it and HATED todoroki for it

ShriekingSisterhood

wow thats some real shit there

cassetticon

im crying  this is so good

ShriekingSisterhood

actually i would add iida to the curling team

he also likes Understanding The Ice

starsinger

awwwwww

ShriekingSisterhood

and its a lot of speed and velocity and such considerations

which is actually relevant for his power

starsinger

mmmm true

ShriekingSisterhood

hey does iida just wear bigass pants to hide his engine legs

dataghost

was Iowa's bro also on the curling team....he joins cause he was Inspired and Wants To Live Up To Him

ShriekingSisterhood

like all the time, in v=civilian form

starsinger

sjffjdk.

maybe so.

ShriekingSisterhood

does he wear leg warmers in the summer

starsinger

AUGHGHDFH

dataghost

but then the curling team gets cut off before iida can win The Big  Trophy and :(

starsinger

i feel like long skirt is more practical for this

oh noo

ShriekingSisterhood

honestly yeah

i love bnha: shittiest sports anime ever au

cassetticon

same

ShriekingSisterhood

hey is present mic supposed to be secret identity in this au too

bc i honestly cant see that

cassetticon

definitely not

dataghost

I feel like he's one of those like, celebrity heroes

cassetticon

yea

ShriekingSisterhood

besides the overall distinctiveness

he just, could not shut up about it, on his public radio show so,

cassetticon

yeah exactly.

dataghost

EYAH

plus like. it only gets the show BETTER ratings so why hide it

ShriekingSisterhood

what if hes married to  Aizawa but Aizawa made him choose between being maried to civilian guy Aizawa or Eraserhead

starsinger

what if hes a celebrity hero with a radio show. and then has a civilian identity as an english teacher

ShriekingSisterhood

bc Aizawa's identity is mega secret

dataghost

god aizawa would hate all the attention either way

ShriekingSisterhood

omg

dataghost

I feel like he doesn't even want eraserhead to be a super well known hero

cassetticon

i mean thats just real in canon

ShriekingSisterhood

Aizawa, sick of the attention, tells Mic to fake his death at the hands of like a villain

"it will be good for ur show ratings"

cassetticon

he canonically does hate publicity and does not want to be known by anyone

ShriekingSisterhood

"no one bothers the dead"

dataghost

omfg

ShriekingSisterhood

or maybe the relationship is still secret but they can't ever go out anywhere bc Mic gets so easilly recognized

dataghost

Mic has so much fun pretending to be dramatically mourning his dead civilian husband

ShriekingSisterhood

"PRO HERO CELEB PRESENT MIC, SPOTTED BUYING DINNER FOR LOCAL HOMELESS MAN, AMAZING GENEROSITY"

dataghost

egjbvjjgb kon k

starsinger

FGHDJAFJ AUSFJG NOOO

ShriekingSisterhood

Re: mic mourning his dead civilian husband

hes like,

"OH IF ONLY HE HAD BEEN A SUPER TOO"

"IF ONLY HE HAD THE POWER TO, SAY, ERASE OTHER PEOPLES POWERS, HE NEVER WOULD HAVE COME TO THIS SAD FATE"

dataghost

Aizawa is just glaring Murder at him

ShriekingSisterhood

"ALSO HERES THE NEW TOP HIT FROM POP GROUP  "Q 5" ITS QUITE A BOP LISTENERS"

"ITS HELPING ME GET OVER MY DEPRESSION, FROM THE, EAD HUSBAND"

starsinger

god

ShriekingSisterhood

What if present mics so bad at acting that people think he murdered his fake dead husband

cassetticon

holy fuck

starsinger

now im like. ideeply want to see the many subplots that are jsut 'iida has to deal with the time conflict between mathletics and curling'

hfdjkf

ShriekingSisterhood

what if thru some hilarious misunderstanding all might applied to be the gym teacher but it turned out he was accidentally applying to be the masthletics coach

starsinger

its shenanigans because he tries to do both of them at the same time because hes like 'i have superspeed itll be fine' its Not Fine

IJADIJ;LDFSAJLKDFKJLFDJKL NOOOOOOOOO

ShriekingSisterhood

"I thought you meant you needed a Male Athletics Coach??? M Athletics"

dataghost

he doesnt know shit about math so his only coaching contribution is like Pep Talks

starsinger

yES

all might giving INSPIRING PEP TALKS

to the mathletes

ShriekingSisterhood

"GUYS, SOMETIMES THE SINE OF A NUMBER, IS THE FRIENDS YOU MADE ALONG THE WAY"

starsinger

which end up being coached by. iida

dataghost

beuatiufl...

iida ends up stepping up as like, Team Captain Who Actually Can THelp People Train  Math

starsinger

momo is in charge of the science olympiad

and also the science bowl

ShriekingSisterhood

"REACH  FOR THE LIMIT, WHICH THERE IS NONE, BUT I GUESS IN MATH SOMETIMES THERE IS, BUT OTHERWISE"

starsinger

the ONLY LIMIT... IS THE LOWER LIMIT!

dataghost

theres only 1 sport but there's Many different Nerd-Offs

starsinger

yea exactly

its really funny bc its the opposite of canon where everyone is jocks even if theyre nerds

ShriekingSisterhood

everyone is nerds even if theyre joks....

finally balance

starsinger

yea...

dataghost

kaminari tries to start some kind of Movie Club as an excuse to just slack off and watch movies during club time

but then the nerds invade it and it turns into a big Trivia Game thing and kaminari just puts his head in his hands

cassetticon

He Tried

starsinger

uhghfjfd

ShriekingSisterhood

the one jock-exclusive

starsinger

and kirishima  i think

ShriekingSisterhood

yeah,,,, god kirishima

cursed boy

dataghost

pats him

starsinger

i love him so much'

ShriekingSisterhood

i love him also....

dataghost

remember how bakugou joined all the sports teams just bc he could. kirishima joins all the sports teams independently bc its manly

and then bakugou assumes he's like, trying to compete with him

ShriekingSisterhood

ooooh my god

starsinger

sdfghj

ShriekingSisterhood

real

starsinger

kirishima tries to bond w bakugou abt not being good at curling and bakuogu is like hOw Dare You

ShriekingSisterhood

THIS IS THE WORST NEG OF MY LIFE

starsinger

'man how is todoroki sO good at this i dont get it'

'DIE'

dataghost

god rip kirishima

Too Cursed To Live

ShriekingSisterhood

the best thing is that when bakugo is like "ill destroy you, ill punch ur face" kirishima is just like "fyes uck me UP bro"

he 100% knows what hes getting into

starsinger

i really like the idea of bakugou bein g like ill fuck you AND todoroki up. about curling

when he cant like

skate yet

ShriekingSisterhood

hsfhdjh

hes still holding on to the bar at the edge of the rink

starsinger

ok i just looked it up and curling does not actually use skates

but

ShriekingSisterhood

talking about how hes going to be indispuitable number one curler

starsinger

eyah

dataghost

while lying on his face having fallen down

starsinger

hey guys. guys. guys does a villain attack the ice rink

and somehow it means they have to cooperate and learn a leson about teamwork

and skating pysics

but it doesnt SUPER work but it works a little bit

dataghost

god they have to ~work together~ but also not let any of the others see their powers

starsinger

fcfuki tho they dont know its them so like king explodokill is like 'maybe now i have a mmodicum of respect. for red riot. maybe. a tiny bit' but is still like KIRISHIMA MADE FUN OF ME ABOUT SKATING THO AND I HATE IT

ohhhhh thast good also fdjfdjkdfjk

maybe they have to work together to get to the locker room but wont say why (its bc their costumes r there)

but then the final fight is as hero guys?

dataghost

oo that makes sense that's good

none of them even like, stops to think about the Coincidence chdmxm

except Maybe todoroki

and even he only does like way after the fact

starsinger

yae

fuck i just rmembered izukus hero name and am having a fucking freakout

dataghost

god!!!!!

bakugou is fucking. haunted by it

does he know izuku's secret id when he picks it or does he find out later

starsinger

?

dataghost

like . when izuku picks the name "deku" does bakugou know yet or no

i guess this question makes less sense in this au

cause like how could he be a hero if he doesnt have a hero name yet

starsinger

i think maybe its

izuku introduces himself as the hero deku for the first time and thats when bakugou realizes that that new hero whos been running around........ is . izuku

and obvsly Flips the Fuck Out

dataghost

ghhhhhgggghh

starsinger

i think. u kno the flash onto bakugou and urarakas faces

i think id want to keep that

but with the added 'oh shit thats izuku'

context from the au

dataghost

goddddd

for uraraka too?

like is she Also just finding out

starsinger

mmmmmmaybe

maybe not actually

yeah idk depends how deep the hijinx run lol. how long izuku was determined to Not Tell Anyone About Hero Shit

dataghost

feel like it could be A Long While cause he'd feel like he'd have to be secretive For All Might

starsinger

yeahhh exactly...

altho if superheroes are a big thing but secret identities are a bigger thing it might be Less secretive

bc like. theres no inherent connection between 'a new superhero appears' and 'all might'

dataghost

but I feel like izuku would be nervous anyway

starsinger

yeah for sure

dataghost

and he's v strategic & thoughtful so I feel like he'd Understand The Importance Of Secret Identity and be like "no one ever!!!!"

starsinger

yeahh That rings true for me ithink

i was just like 'if 'quirkless izuku' and 'hero deku' arent inherently connected bc Every Civilian Secret Identity Is Quirkless then its not as big a deal

dataghost

yeah also fair

so are quirks way rarer in this au?

starsinger

but ur right that all might def has the No One Can Know Im Human thing

and izuku would also probably

i dont know if quirks are Rarer or if theyre just hilariously secret even tho literally most of the population has one

and many of them are very visible

dataghost

what if like. quirklessness is rare but everyone's civilian id is still quirkless

and everyone just. d oesnt notice

starsinger

tsuyu: yeah im quirkless. kero.

dataghost

also like. Basically everyone who's quirkless is actually a hero in disguise

but no one puts the dots together

starsinger

just had the thought 'i really like bnha superhero au' and fuckgin died

[headoverhiddles]

Matrimony - Pope x Reader (Let Me Make You A Martyr) [Part I]

Synopsis: You and a skilled hitman are forced to work together to take out a mutual ‘friend’ through teamwork. But together is the opposite of how Pope works, and he already despises you. 

Aka the super filthy, depraved fake marriage au no one asked for :) 

Notes: this will be a three parter, with updates every three days! Enjoy! 

Tagging: (ask to be added) @peachynun​

PART II 

PART III

Pope barely lets the guy finish speaking—he’s already rejected the terms, regardless of the pay.  

“I haven’t even told you the haul yet,” the man who had come to him, Jack Redman, chuckles. Pope does not share his amusement, which he makes clear through a scathing glare. Pope’s glares had the ability to convey a particular type of anger, so intensely that nobody usually challenged him any further… but it meant Redman’s ass if he returned without a yes. 

The two were sitting in Pope’s cabin, devoid mostly of decoration, only the necessities surrounding them. The kitchen table they sat at was low, homemade out of rain-bleached wood from around the area. On their plates, the two had almost finished cuts of red deer meat Pope had offered. It was rare enough for Redman to pick at it, and Pope to devour it.

The propositioner sighs. “She’s a peach. Trust me. Easy on the eyes, all that.”

Despite the bloody mess on his plate, Pope cuts his food with the manners of a King, lifting his fork to his mouth delicately. “She’s a drug runner. I don’t work with drug runners, I kill drug runners.” He has an underlying southern drawl to his voice, a false comfort that eases his targets. Fear always spoiled the hit, just like hunting. 

Redman pushes his plate away in exasperation. “She’s a drug runner who has potential. She wants to help you. This could be an opportunity to--"

“I work alone. That’s final.” Pope gets up from the kitchen table, ending the conversation. Redman shakes his head, chasing after the tall, bullheaded hitman. 

“Fuckin’… stubborn piece of shit… listen, Pope!”  

“I ain’t listening to anything you have to say,” Pope turns, face calm and stern. “I’m done listening. And you’re done talking.” Redman eyes Pope’s rack of guns which he is standing in front of, and swallows.

“Look. My boss is prepared to give you a big fucking bag of dough for this.”    

“How big is fucking big?” Pope asks, taking a pistol off the rack and beginning to clean it. Redman keeps his eyes on the weapon warily.

“It’s a lot, man. At least a million dollars is in this for you if you just test the waters, and finish the job.”

Pope purses his lips. “Half for me, half for this slut I’m supposed to carry around?”  

“Each,” Redman replies. Pope sets the gun down, and the rag with it. He takes his glasses off, polishes them with his shirt, then puts them back on.

“Three days. That’s all it’ll take. We'll see what happens.”

---

You tuck your gun in your back pocket. You’d never had any real reason to use it thus far, since your job, while dangerous, thankfully never got that physical.

Drug dealing seemed a natural path for you to take. Your parents had both been in the business of the black market, your mother an illegal arms dealer and your father working for your mother. Growing up in a family with a “small business”, it had led you to a code of morals that are currently getting in the way.

Morals that say Daegland Pierce, notorious dealer, needs to die.

Since you and your boss both knew you couldn’t carry it out alone, you had been eager to find someone who could carry out the job with you. Your boss got to talking, and as it turns out, there’s some kind of agreement that’s been made. You’re in the dark about the whole thing with him, but all you really need to know is your role in all of it. 

“His name’s Pope.” 

“Any file on him?” you ask, crossing your arms. Lane swirls his drink around. 

“There’s no file for this guy anywhere. He just… is.”

“How do you know what kind of killer he is?”

“Word of mouth. Everybody knows Pope, and nobody knows him.”

“I’m one of the nobodies, would you mind giving me a little more insight, so I know the guy I’m going to be working with?”

Lane shakes his head. “Ask him yourself. You’re meeting him at the rendezvous point, by Exit 19 on the Tollcross back road. Nothing but farmland out there, ‘til you reach the woods Pierce has shacked up in.”

“These the coordinates?” you ask, tapping a map that had been placed in front of you.

"Wrapped up inside. Quit asking questions, will ya? Go do the job, don’t run your mouth at this guy or he’ll shoot it off, and come back richer for the experience." You go to get up, but Lane stops you. "(y/n). I know you think you're real tough, kay? You ain't shit compared to this guy. He'll rip your spleen out if you get on his bad side. So just lay low, do you gotta do, and don't piss him off."

"What makes you think I would?" you ask. Lane sighs, shaking his head.

"There's gonna be two corpses out there by Friday, I swear to god."

--

You drive a crappy throwaway VW bug up a grassy back road, studying the map closely. There's an x marked where you're supposed to meet Pope, and you're coming up on it now. You toss the map to the passenger seat, and crane your neck to see from the sunken seat. There's a black car up ahead, with a man leaning against it.

You park the bug, grab the map, and toss a match in, burning the thing out. You walk up to him, and take a look as you approach. He's tall, got glasses, and has cropped black hair. He's got a few tattoos, maybe more, you notice as he lifts a cigarette up, but most are covered by long black sleeves. How he could wear long sleeves in this heat is beyond you, but you're not here to question his attire. He's actually pretty well dressed, if you'd go so far as to admit it. He's not bad looking either, for a man in his early to mid forties.

The bug blows up behind you, and you smirk.

"(y/n)," you say, sticking out your hand. His dark eyes move over to you boredly, taking you in with a vertical sweep. He finally puts his cigarette between his lips, which are curiously dainty, and shakes your hand. Whatever elegance his features hold are balanced out by the roughness of his hands-- his skin is like leather, and his nails are chipped and dirty.

"You know who I am," he says simply, in a buried genteel southern accent.

You take a spot next to him, leaning against the car as well. He glances sideways at you, but doesn't say anything. He just smokes in silence. You wonder if it'll be like one of those miraculous bonding moments, where he'd offer you a drag, and it would be like some unspoken code of respect had passed between you two.

You lose hope for that as Pope continues to do his best to ignore you. You eventually clear your throat.

"So. I've got a plan."

"No. I've got a plan. This ain’t your show, kid."

You frown. "Don't call me kid."

"Okay, sweetheart."

"Don't call me sweetheart!"

"What do you want me to call you then? Cause I've got a few ideas."

You scoff. What a fucking asshole! Still, your boss' warning is present in your mind, so you shut your mouth, and get in the car. Pope drops his butt, snuffs it out carefully with his shoe, and gets in the driver's side.

"I heard we're going to be taking the cabin next to his," you bring up.  "Must be nice to live out in the woods. Plus, I bet the asshole's place is nice and furnished. He's loaded to hell." You purse your lips. "Is it a long drive to the cabin?"

Pope doesn't answer. Instead, he turns up the stereo, which is just finishing up Johnny B Goode. Then, an old country song that sounds like a bloodhound wailing to the tune of a two string banjo comes on. It's got some lyrics about preaching the gospel, and you sigh, resting your head against the window.

"This is fucking terrible."

Pope looks ahead. "Mhm."

"You seem like a rock kind of guy, not this."

"'Mhm."

“Not even classic rock?”

"Mmm."

With a huff, you turn to look out the window and let the grumpy older hitman, who apparently only knew how to communiticate by varying grunts, enjoy his lovesick religious whining on the radio.

Eventually, you make it down a dirt path, leaves and branches hitting the sides of the car.

“Welcome home,” Pope says, pulling up at the cabin the two of you would be staying at. You get out, looking around. It’s pretty remote.

"Where's his place?"

"Just down the way a little," Pope replies, unloading some things from the car, "Before you ask, no, we are not going over right now. We're setting our rooms up-- far away from one another-- and settling in for the night."

"And lemme guess, you're gonna pour some whiskey sour and spin 'Solitary Man' on vinyl while scraping your boots on the porch?"

He can't even be bothered enough to muster up a glare. He simply gives you a bored look through those wire rimmed glasses, and walks toward the house. You look around, and when you think you hear a cracked twig, follow him quickly.

 ---

Pope sets a lantern on the table, and pushes you your plate of food.

"Thank you," you say. It was genuinely nice of him to prepare food for the both of you, something you hadn't expected him to do.

"Uh huh." You eat in silence for a bit, the crickets outside the window your only accompaniment to dinner. It's a nice cabin, in a pretty nice little thicket of forest. You can certainly see the appeal of living out here-- especially as someone in Pierce's line of work.

Pope finally speaks. "So what kind of drugs do you sell?"

"Why? You interested?" You already know the answer, but so far, it’s been fun teasing him. He tents his fingers.

"I don't fuck with drugs. They dull the wits, and I need those to not die."

"Depends on the drug," you grin. He miraculously cracks a small smile, and you go on. "Just homegrown shit. I don't bother with trying to sell party drugs. That scene just gets the cops all over your business." Pope nods. "You ever get cops on you?"

He cocks his head. "Around here? The three good, upstanding police officers who actually care enough to know what's going on beneath their noses are on my payroll. Any marshals or anything are easily deterred."

"You just use your charm and good looks?"

"Believe it or not, I'm pretty good with people," he says. You scoff.

"That's a good one."

He spends a long time staring at you. You can feel his gaze on you as you eat, and it prickles your skin. You can't tell if you like it or not. You wonder if you should say something else. Eventually, he gets up, taking his plate to the cabin's quaint kitchen. You missed your chance.

He cleans his plate, and stops by the stairs. "Why'd you want to come out here to put two people on a one man job?"

"I wanted to see it get done. I guess I... didn't trust you."

"Do you now?"

"What?"

He looks at you over his glasses. "Do you trust me now?"

You sit forward. "I don’t trust anyone but myself."

He nods. "You don’t trust me cause you haven’t seen me do what I do."

You chew on your bottom lip. You hadn't gotten the chance to tell him your plan, and by all accounts, you know he's not going to like it. These three days may be more difficult than you thought.

After slowly finishing the rest of your dinner, you head upstairs to find the remaining bedroom. As you're passing the doors, you catch a glimpse of one partially open. Inside, Pope is lying awake, staring up at the ceiling. You quickly hurry past, hoping he didn't see you, and find the empty bedroom at the end of the hall. Finding it furnished with a few old blankets, you toss a pillow down. You slip out of your clothes to your bra and panties, and get into bed.

You don’t know what to make of the man in the other room. Until you do, you’d better keep him at arm’s length.  

[imagine-young-g]

FWB to MWB

Hello  G fam! It’s been a while but I’m back. I’m not too sure for how long but I am back. A lot has been happening in my life, and I have not been able to be as dedicated as I could be to this page. I hope you all enjoy this story about a gorgeous, normal, single mama that just so happens to be FWB with the one and only Young Gerald.

“Zay! Where are you hun?” I was calling my little sass for sometime now and she just wouldn’t answer.

“Zay….Zaybrie. ZAY!”

“I’m right here mommy you don’t have to yell,” she muttered.

My gorgeous little sass looked up at me while fumbling with the zipper to her favorite panda jacket. I never thought in a million years I would be here. 23years old, rollers in my hair, stressing over a trip to the grocery store, and staring down at my mini-me. I had Zay when I was 19 years old. She was the product of an mentally and sometimes physically abusive relationship. My ex was just not the ish like I had once thought. We were high school sweethearts and he wanted a military life, I on the other hand wanted to embrace the world. If it wasn’t for my pregnancy I most likely never would have made it out. She is my saving grace and literally only reason I haven’t been locked away due to insanity.

“UGH! Mommy I can’t do this! It’s broken.”

My train of thought is broken as my disgruntled 4 year old is completely over the zipper on this damn jacket. I didn’t even know why she wanted to wear this out. The jacket is worth more than gold to this little girl since her best pal G got it for her the last time he was in Tokyo at some hip Japanese boutique. The tag says it was an adult small but by the looks of it, it could have passed for a child’s shmedium. I easily guide the zipper together and with a little zrrrp its up.

“Baby. Why do you wanna wear Panda to the store today? It’s a little damp out, aren’t you afraid of getting it messed up?”

“Mommy we live in the Bay it’s always moist outside.”

Ugh! That word is like nails on a chalkboard for me, but of course G knows this and still decided to teach my 4year old to say this word to completely throw her mother off every chance she got. This cake is moist, my hair is moist. Mommy my skin is moist.” Any chance this little girl got to say it she took it.

“Because Mommy, we’re gonna meet up with Gerry today and I want him to see that I love my jacket.”

She was the only girl I knew in the world that could call him that. Gerry, or G as I like to call him, is none other than the Bay Area kid G-Eazy. I met him about 3 years ago when Zay was barely old enough to walk. I had been working at a local diner, and going to school full time when one rainy Saturday morning a mob of sweaty drunk dudes come barging in at 7am demanding coffee, pie, and whatever grease filled meal they could put in their bellies to prevent a hangover from hell. I was overworked, underpaid, exhausted, and at my wits end; so when this tall jerk of man tried to holla at your girl I was not having it. He tried the whole “Hey Ma!” Come here with one finger bit. I naturally walked over and asked if there was anything he needed. To his reply of “You see I made you come over her with one finger imagine what I could do with two.” I was so beyond pissed I through a glass of ice water and told his ass to cool down. My boss saw, asked me if I knew who this fool was, and fired me when I blantantly said I could give a fuck. As I walked out of the diner I heard loud steps running after me. I being the street smart girl that I am turned around and straight punched this dude in the face.

“Damn ma! First you soak me then you floor me? I gotta know who you are now that I damn near fell for you.”

At that point I lost my shit again. I went on a whole tangent of who do you think you ares and why don’t you fuck offs. I turned around after I thought I gave him a piece of my mind and he followed me asking me all kinds of questions. I don’t know when or how it happened but I began to answer them. We eventually got on the subject of me being single with a kid and how he admired that. He walked me the 8 blocks all the way home to my mom’s house. We exchanged numbers and have been “friends” ever since.

“Ohhh I see. You’re trying to look cute for Gerry?”

“No Mommy, you’re trying to look cute for Gerry since you got the rollers in your hair. I just wanna say thank you for my jacket.”

Damn my kid caught me. So what if I wanted my hair to look a little nicer than normal for when I saw G. I mostly wanted it to look nice because it never fails that when I’m with him we end up on some tabloid. Everyone pretty much knows that we just fuck each other, I mean even my own grandmother knows it. It turned into that after a drunk night I went on tour with him and Zay. I’m not sure what came over us but as she slept in my bunk I was in the back of the bus with G.

I’ll never forget that night, not because I have feelings for him, but because he has to be the best lay of my entire life. He had just finished his last number I mean It and every time he said “If I ever said I fucked your bitch…” he would look at me with pure lust in his eyes. He ended the show. Ran off stage to the back where we all followed. Zay was wearing her purple sound blocking headphones on the verge of sleep, but she stayed up to give Gewy a hug. As soon as she got it she passed out. The after party in the back of the stadium was cut short since we had to pile on the bus and head to San Diego. I was shocked when a group of girls that somehow managed to get backstage asked to get on the bus and “rock G’s World” were turned down and told to scram. Everyone began to go towards the busses when G grabbed my hand and guided me through the crown of groupies and photographers. Once we were safely on the bus G made an announcement.

“Yo if any of you motherfuckers wanna be loud go on the other bus. This is the quiet bus tonight. Zay’s gotta sleep and I ain’t in the mood for the bull shit.”

People began to pile of the bus into the other bus leaving only a handful of crew members, G, a few of his homies, me and Zay. Zay was fighting her sleep as we sat on the burgundy couches that were just before the bunks in the little kitchen area. She kept playing peek-a-boo with an exhausted raspy voiced G, but he kept playing with her. She sat on his lap facing him and just kept staring at his face. She would grab at his nose, poke at his eyes, grab his eyebrows, and put her little hand over his mouth where he would then play nibble on her fingers causing her to squeal. She kept rubbing her eyes till eventually she wrapped her arms around G to give him a hug and she passed out. Her little body was completely calm and at peace with him as she let out little soft snores. G stood up and took her to the bunk that was designated for her and I. It was a bottom bunk and he made sure no one was allowed to sleep on the one above. He laid her in the middle of the bunk covered her with her little peach baby blanket, and placed pillows all around her so she wouldn’t roll over or roll off the bunk. He even stuffed pillows on the side facing the aisle so that if she did roll there was a little wall there to protect her. I stood there watching him do all this in shock. He then motioned for me to come see the job he had done.

“She’s a stunner you know. In 15 years we’re gonna have to beat the dudes off with a stick to protect her.”

“We? G we’re homies, I told you I’m not looking to date. I gotta finish..”

“School. Yeah I know. I’m attached now. Just because we ain’t nothing doesn’t mean I’m never gonna be here for her.”

“G you say that but what happens when you keep going and touring? We can’t keep tagging along. I’m almost done with my degree and before you know it, I'll be a social worker working a 9-5.”

“True but come on Caily, you’ll be able to come out sometimes. You and Zay. I want you a part of my life even if we’re just friends. I love this kid.”

I could tell he was being honest despite the alcohol. I just wanted a stable figure in Zay’s life so I didn’t think a rapper could be that (I was eventually proven wrong.)

“Okay G. But if it gets too much, you’re the one that’s gonna have to tell Zay you’re out.”

“Never gonna happen!”

“Never say never.”

“I’m telling you it’s never and I never lie.” He smirked and bit his lower lip giving me those dreamy brown I want you eyes. I was wearing a cropped When It’s Dark Out T-shirt hand cut by me, some high waisted boyfriend jeans, kicked off the chucks a while ago so I was barefoot showing off my home pedicured black toenails. He on the other hand was freshly showered, hair wet and floppy, wearing a black hoodie, matching sweatpants, socks, and slides. He looked my body up and down again and licked his lips. I ignored this look having seen his crew do it millions of times. I walked back to the couch and he followed. I sat back and sipped on my water as he kept eyeing me.

“What?!”

“Nothing Cails. I just like looking at you.”

“That is so corny my dude,” I laughed-talked at him.

“I’m serious Cails.”

“That’s just the whiskey talking you dork.”

“Nah I’m dead serious, you’re just too stubborn and think your un-loveable to notice.”

“Oh so now you love me?”

“Yeah I got a love for you girl. You’ll never reciprocate it so I’ll just keep it,” he put his finger to his lips motioning a shhh.

“Hmm okay Gerald.”

“I like it when you say that. I like how you say it, Gerald,” he attempted to mimic the syllables like I say them.

“You’re drunk my dude.”

“Yeah maybe. But I know when I’m sober the pain feels worse because I can actually feel it.”

He looked at me with these soulful, sorrow filled eyes. I could tell in that moment he meant every word. He could tell I picked up on this vibe and leaned in. I felt the tip of his nose touched mine and pulled away. I quickly stood up.

“I better go check on Zay.”

As I walked toward the bunk he followed me. I was about to pull the curtain open when we grabbed me by my arm and spun me around. I was now looking up at him and seeing the intense lust in his eyes. His left arm was still holding on to mine as his right hand cupped my face and pulled me in for a kiss. His lips so soft and so sweet against mine as he just held them there against mine. He pulled away to see my reaction. I couldn’t move. The kiss stuck my feet to the floor causing me to be planted their hoping for another. He kissed me again this time with more passion making me kiss him back. We stood their in a full on mack sesh until he pulled away and walked towards the back of the bus where he sleeps. In that moment I had a choice. I could either crawl into the bunk with my daughter or run to the feeling I have been missing my whole life and give in. Before I could give it a second thought, I began to run towards him.

“Gerald.”

He turned towards me just in time for me to put my arms around his neck and kiss him. Our lips crashed against each other causing each of us to go completely numb and breathless. He mumbled “jump” while still in my kiss. I hopped up wrapping my legs around him as he began walking me towards the king size. He pushed the button to shut and lock the door behind him as we kissed. He plopped me on the bed and pulled his hoodie off over his head with one hand like all men do. I could feel myself getting wet as he then pressed his freshly bare torso onto my body. He gave me another hard passionate kiss, this time sliding his tongue over my bottom lip begging for me to allow him in. Begging to go deeper and begging to explore me. I gave in slipping my tongue into his ready opened mouth. This passionate kiss cause a throaty moan to escape from him. We kept kissing as he grinded his hips into mine, causing me to whimper. He began to kiss my neck and work his way up to my earlobe as his hand went up my shirt pawing at by titts making me moan and getting my wetter by the second. He pushed up my shirt and bra exposing my D cup titts and flush pink nipples. He admired them for a moment before giving one of my nipples a teasing lick. He stared deep into my eyes as he did this, then he began to suck on my titt as he rubbed and pinched my other nipple. I began to grind up my hips to meet his as he sucked all over both titts leaving raw love bites around each nipple. He licked at each bite causing a tinge of pain to go through my body. It was a good pain, a needed pain. By this point I was completely soaked and ready for more. He kissed down my faintly stretch marked tummy as he made his way take of my pants. As he pulled them down, I sat up on my knees, pulled my bra and shirt all the way off, wrapped my arms around him and kissed. His bare chest against my titts felt absolutely amazing. I could tell he loved it just as much as I did by the way he grabbed me closer to his body. He then brushed my hair away from my neck, then gave my hair a nice pull as he kissed my sweet spot on my neck just before my ear causing me to moan out and claw my nails along his back, and through his hair. As I clawed over him he moaned in my neck shooting warm air against my ear driving me wild. I turned his body to where I could lay him down on the bed. I pulled away from the kiss, gave him a good sloppy lust filled one ending in a lip bite before playfully pushing him on his back. I began to kiss his neck, and bite on his earlobes driving him wild. Doing so caused me to give my ass a smack shooting a tingle up to my nipples making my pussy twitch. I kissed down his body having him release little moans. I sit up on my knees again, giving him a lustful look as I began to rub his cock through the sweatpants. I pull them down revealing a beautiful pink hard cock dripping with precum. I pull the pants all the way down, removing his socks as well and begin to place kisses all over his cock as my hand caresses his balls. His breath begins to deepen as I kiss up his long thick cock towards the tip. I hold it up and look deep into his eyes and place it in my mouth. As it enters my mouth I hear his breathing change again. I wrap my lips around half of his cock and suck as I bob my head up. A moan escapes his now parted lips as I repeat the process a few more times, taking him deeper into my mouth each time. I suck up with a pop and tap the tip of his cock on my tongue.

“Ohh you dirty girl. You look so good with my cock.”

“MMMMhmmmm,” is all I let out as I take his cock back into my throat, the hum causing a vibration around his cock making him close his eyes as I begin to make oral love to his perfect 8 inch cock. Up and down, up and down, I can feel him throbbing as I bob my head taking him as deep as I can go without gagging. Ever so often I shove him all the way down past my tonsils to the point where is balls are practically in my mouth. A breathy “fuck” is the only thing that escapes his mouth each time I deep throat him down. I laid there on my belly sucking his cock for a good solid 5 closer to 10 minutes when he stopped me.

“MMMBaby stop...get over here.” He seductively growled as he pulled me up towards his face. I had my legs on either side of his body as he pulled me in for a kiss.

“HMMWhat’s wrong you can’t handle it.” I asked him as I placed kisses on his lips, along his jawline, and towards his neck.

“Uhhbaby I can it’s just I don’t wanna cum in your mouth.” He then guided my head back into the position where he could kiss my pouty lips. He slipped me the tongue and gave me a passionate french. I could feel his tongue dance with mine in my mouth in the most sexy ass way. I wanted to be cheesy and ask him where he wanted to cum but I couldn’t break from that kiss. We stayed in that position kissing like that for a while. During that time I guess I had slid down his body because I could feel the tip of his cock brush against my thong covered taint and swipe along my ass. When he felt that he let out a moan in my throat driving each of us wild causing me to grind down and hump his cock. I could feel his tip perfectly glide against my clothed clit sending waves of desire through both our bodies. I humped down on him only 3 times before he flips me over and in a lustful rush kisses down my belly to the line of my thong. You couldn’t tell how wet I truly was through the black cotton material until he rubbed his entire hand over my pussy.

“Damn Caily you’re so fucking wet.” He rubbed up and down admiring how flooded my pussy got at the sins we were committing. He quickly pulled thong off over my feet and discarding it God knows where. He began to give hard bites and kisses all along my thighs teasing my core with his warm breath. He gave a kiss right above my clit causing my hips to thrust up towards his face.

“MMMBaby you want this huh? You want me to eat this perfect pussy?” He looked me dead in the eye begging for permission and I nodded allowing him to begin his work. He licked a long straight line from my taint, between my wet lips, up past my clit leaving a kiss at the top of my pubic bone. This sent shock waves through my body. I grabbed my tits and began to toy with my nipples. This view caused a reaction in Gerald I never saw before. Like a rabid beast he began to devour my pussy. The combination of harsh licks, and clit sucking had me grinding my pussy in his face. He loved it. Every grind he would smirk and stick his tongue in my pussy, flattening it out once inside filling my pussy. Then came the fingers. He started by teasing my entrance with two fingers as he sucked my clit blowing my mind. He just kept toying with me as he sucked up all my pussy juices and grinding on his perfect face.

“Damn G finger me please.” I begged at this point. His face was in complete shock as he shoved his two long fingers up my pussy causing me to moan out and bare down hard.

“Fuuuck Baby you’re so damn tight.” My leg was now resting on his back as he made this statement. He was staring at my pussy in amazement as he now was knuckles deep in. He used his thumb to swipe my clit as he just completely finger blasted me. I was a wreck just moaning and grinding my hips feeling how amazing his fingers felt inside me. Then...he started eating my pussy again. The combination of licks and clit sucks while he was knuckles deep had me a complete mess. I was grabbing him by his hair begging him to stop or even slow down but he wouldn’t. This was right where he wanted me. He kept going and sucking to the point that I felt my entire body crash as I came. I came hard on his fingers, bearing down and trying to run away. He held me by one leg and kept sucking and finger fucking. It wasn’t long before I came again. I was a wet shaky mess as he began to slurp up all my juices. He pulled his fingers out of my pussy and I could see how wet they were. He lapped up the rest of my juice as I shuddered. When he reached my clit, I had to pull away because damn it was sensitive. He smiled as he sat up on his knees. I sat up just as he was about to lick me off his fingers. I grabbed his hand and began to suck my juices off his fingers. His face was priceless as he let out another “fuck” under his breath.

I kept licking and sucking his fingers as he watched for a seductive minute until he crashed his lips into mine. He wrapped his arms around me pulling my onto his thighs. I could feel is cock beneath my pussy just begging to enter in and explore me. I began to grind my hips down as he smacked my ass playfully. I little out a whimper causing him to smack a little harder. I moaned into his kiss as he now smacked my ass even harder but still the reserve in fear of hurting me. He began to maneuver his body as if he was going to lay me down, but before he got the chance I reached in between our bodies and guided his cock into my tight, dripping pussy. I looked him deep in his eyes letting out a gasp and creating a hitch in his breath. I slowly began to work my hips down causing his cock to climb deeper into my pussy with each small bounce. The slew of curse words spewing from his lips as I rode that fat cock, moaning and whimpering wanting him deeper yet. As I bounced up and down, his mouth met my tits and began to nip at my skin and nipples. I began riding sloppy as my legs were ready to give out due to the sheer pleasure being shot through my core and the hot spark of pain from my tits as he sucked my nipples to the point of being raw. He laid me down on my back, making sure to give me a deep long kiss as he began to pound into my pussy.

*Smack. Smack. Smack* is all you heard as he drilled his 8 full inches deep into my guts. With every thrust I whimpered into his kiss. “Fuck fuck fuck!” Is all I could let out as he fucked the absolute shit out of me. He went from kissing my lips to sucking on my neck as I clawed his back causing him to growl in pure sadistic pleasure. I don’t know exactly what he did, but with the slightest swivel of his hips, he was now hitting my spot at a different angle. Before I could even let out a sound I was seeing stars. It was the fastest build-up of electric butterflies sending currents down to my core releasing what felt like a million volts of earth shattering electricity throughout my body. He could feel me cum as my pussy began to drip even more and my walls strangled his cock.

“Fuck babygirl you’re so damn good. You like how I fuck this tight ass pussy huh?” He growled those words through clenched teeth as I begged him to keep fucking me just as he was. He swiveled his hips again sending another orgasm through my body. I bared down a little too hard and almost pushed him out.

“Nah-uh don’t you fucking push me out. Open up that pussy baby,” he begged. I did my best eventually coming down from my high in the slightest allowing his cock to go balls deep again. I knew he was getting close as his “fucks” were more frequent and his stroke was getting sloppier. I wanted him to cum so bad. No just because I didn’t feel like I could take another orgasm, but because the giver in me wanted to see pure pleasure rush over his face as he busts. I knew exactly what would push him over the edge. I reached down as far as my hand could and began to fondle his balls.

“FUCK! Oh my God, damn baby! Yes!” He was so close still. It was time to completely go for the kill.

“Cum for me Gerald! Bust that fat load in my tight little pussy. Come on baby fill me up with you cum! Nut in me baby!”

“Fuck you want that baby?!”

“Yes baby! Bust that nut all up in this pussy!” He began to grunt and thrust into me harder than he had before. I could feel the electric butterflies coming again but this time right from my pussy. I started to grind my hips the opposite of his hitting my spot a completely different way sending me to the moon. I squeezed his balls as hard as I could without hurting him and that was it. My body began shaking as I heard him pleading to God and calling out my name. I could feel his warm cum fill me up inside as he kept pumping and I kept grinding. My legs began to shake and before I knew it my entire body was a moaning quaking mess beneath G. Him seeing this decided it would be a good idea to reach down and rub my clit. If felt my whole body clamp up and a rush began to rise from my pussy. I felt like my clit was about to explode when all of a sudden, a shock wave left my body and squirt burst all over his cock. He was so turned on he kept thrusting until neither one of us could take it.

He pulled out his cock and fell next to me completely spent. I was still quivering feeling the aftershocks hit my clit like waves after a tsunami. I was a panting fool with no words being able to form out of my mouth. I could hear him next to me at a complete loss for words. With neither one of us speaking, he turned the ac down low and removed the top sheet I had completely destroyed, only leaving the fitted and the comforter. He covered the both of us and pulled me close to spoon. Damn, not only could he fuck but he wanted to cuddle too? I was getting comfortable and about to doze off when my mind went straight to Zay.

“Oh no Zay!”

“She’s fine.”

“How do you know G? She’s probably awake crying for all we know.”

“No she’s fine. Trust me!”

“G let me go check on her.”

“Listen you could do what you want but I know she’s ok.” Before I could protest he was rolling his body over towards the night stand. I assumed he was about to whip out a blunt and smoke it up, but instead he pulls out a video baby monitor. There she was. My little baby completely zonked out and snoring away.

“I put that in the bunk just in case you wanted to sleep in the bunk above her. I wanted you to have peace of mind and to rest easy.”

I could not believe how incredibly sweet he was. I ended up staying the entire night with him, fucking him one more amazing time before showering and going to lay down with Zay. Ever since then we had been fucking around whenever we got the chance. It was good for us. I didn’t have to worry about a random guy coming in and out of Zay’s life, he didn’t have to worry about a commitment. In the end we were just two friends with needs that could go to each other no matter what. We were both damaged so this worked for us.

*CHING CHING*

“Yay Gerry’s here! Gerry’s here!” I opened the door and there he stood. All 6’4” of him wrapped in leather. Smiling so big you though he won a Grammy.

“AHH Zay Zay! *muah* What’s up lil mama?” He wrapped her up in a big hug squeezing her like she was his own. He tickled her sides causing her to squeal in delight that her friend was here.

“What’s up Big Mama?” He said causing me to roll my eyes because he knew I hated that he called me that.

“Yup there she is haha.” He put Zay down and gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

“You ready to go G? We gotta hit the mall while the kiddies are still in school so we can get everything done.”

“Yeah fo’sho. Let me just take a leak and we’ll bounce.” He made his way to the bathroom and I put on my official G-Eazy letterman from forever ago. I was fixing my lipstick in the mirror when I feel his presence behind me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and whispered how he missed me in my ear.

“G! Come on, not in front of the kid.”

“I know I know.”  We had made a deal that we would never act like a couple in front of Zay in order to keep the peace. We didn’t want to confuse her because she already knew who her dad was and we didn’t want to mess anything up. He gave me a weak smile as he picked up Zay and headed out the door. He had driven his mustang over so I was assuming that’s what we were rollin’ in.

“Really G? I thought we were going incognito?”

“We are! The black beauty is stealthy and sexy.”

“Yeah Mommy. She’s stealfy and sexy.”

“G! You look what you’re teaching her!”

“Zay Zay you can’t say that word till your 75.”

“What word?”

“That 2nd “s” word.”

“Sexy?”

“AHHHH it’s burning my ears,” he shouted as he covered his ears. Zay kept trying to repeat the word a few more attempts as he buckled her into her seat, each time causing G to “shout” and cover his ears. Eventually she stopped and we were on our way. We made our way to the mall and began to shop around. G buying anything and everything Zay wanted. He loved to spoil her no matter the cost. He would try with me but I just wasn’t into all of it. We walked up and down the mall for what seemed like 10 years. We bought snacks along the way but I was so hungry nothing was helping. We eventually stopped for a pretzel at a kiosk outside of a jewelry store in the mall. We were eating the salty treats and drinking the tart lemonade when Zay made a discovery.

“Look Mommy! Look at the pretty rings!”

“Yeah baby they’re pretty huh?”

“You should by one mommy!”

“No Baby mommy doesn’t need one.”

“Why Mommy?”

“Because Baby, only engaged people get those rings.”

“What’s engage?”

“It means people who are getting married.”

“Gerry you should buy one for my Mommy so you can get married!”

“No he shouldn’t Baby now come finish your pretzel.”

“Come on Mommy! You would look so pretty with one.”

“No Baby. Come sit down!”

“Please Gerry! Buy one so you and mommy can get married and have another baby, and you can live with me in my room and and and…”

“Zay! No enough. Now come and sit down.”

“I would Zay Zay but you’re Mommy won’t let me buy her one of those.”

“Why? Mommy why are you so mean?”

“G?! Seriously? Shut the Frick up!” I shot at him between clenched teeth and rage filled eyes. I could not believe that he had just said that to my 4 year old! Especially after all the talks we had about this. He asked a few times about why not? Why not? It’s like because dude! We can’t! I could feel my blood boil as Zay went back to eating her pretzel. I could tell G knew I was beyond livid because he wouldn’t even make eye contact with me. His jaw was clenched like he had something to be pissed about. We finished our snack in complete silence and G was so gone mentally even though his body was there.

“Come on, let’s get you guys home.”

“Gerry! Can we go to cheesecake house and get food? I hungry!”

“No baby we just ate.”

“No mommy we ate a pretzel, not dinner. Come on Gerry? Please?!” At that moment my stomach growled causing both Zay and G to look at me.

“You good?” He asked slightly concerned.

“Yeah I’m chill.” I coldly replied not making eye contact at all.

“Come one let’s go get you some dinner and call it a day.”

“Nah for real. It’s good G.”

“Nah we going and then we’ll call it a day.” He said with a little more force behind his tone. We walked to the car and G put all the bags in the trunk. I strapped Zay in and I could feel him staring at me as I did so. Normally he would make some joke about how good my ass looked but he was so beyond pissed he didn’t say a word. He zipped through traffic like a bat out of hell, white knuckling the steering wheel until we arrived at the restaurant. He handed the keys to valett, took Zay out of her seat and walked into the restaurant. I followed behind him and we were sat at a table in the back. G ordered some pasta dish, and Zay copied him ordering the kids version with chicken. I opted for some fettuccine and shrimp alfredo with a small salad. Zay sat next to G eating away and playing with him the entire dinner. G ignored me and continued to eat with Zay. He didn’t even bother me for a shrimp like he always does, instead he said:

“Ooh playing it safe now yeah Cails.” He never called me Cails unless he was pissed. Zay picked up on it but kept trying to lighten the mood. She kept poking G saying “tickle tickle,” getting him to fake laugh. I ate my meal in silence as the two of them carried on. Zay eventually ordering oreo cheesecake off of the pig girl menu so her and Gerry could share. I sat there continuing to be ignored till Zay quieted down. G finally cooled down enough to talk.

“So why did you blow up Cails?”

“We’re not talking about this right now. Not in front of Zay”

“She’s about to pass out soon then we can talk. Because we are going to talk.” He was right. It didn’t take but 6 minutes before she was completely passed out in the booth. It was now fair game. He looked at me and I had nothing to say.

“Aren’t you going to say anything?”

“There is nothing to say? We have a good thing going why ruin it?”

“Really? You’re ok with what we got?”

“Yeah don’t ruin a good thing?”

“We’ve been fucking with each other for like 3 years and you can honestly tell me you have no feelings for me other than just friends?”

“Yeah. I mean, it hasn’t been 3 solid years. You had your girls in between. Besides you said we were good.”

“Only because you never give me a heads up as to what you feel.”

“I told you I don’t feel! I just go. I don’t have time to sit back and feel. I have to do what’s best for my daughter.”

“So what you think by having a loving man who would literally die for you and the kid isn’t the best thing for her?”

“Well if that loving man wasn’t always rolling out then yeah maybe?”

“I roll out to provide and because it’s my passion. Just like you stay behind as a social worker to fulfill yours.”

“She needs stability! You think living on a tour bus or from hotel to hotel is stable? Besides you can’t just decide you want a life with us just because you got a bond with the kid.”

“A bond with the kid? Well Damn? I thought every time I fucked you we had a bond? I’m not just here for the kid! I’m here for you to but you don’t want it!”

“You never let it be known! You always said we were good with how we were. You even had other girls and I had no one else!”

“I had other girls because you never made the effort!”

“I never made the effort? G I literally would fuck you any chance we got! How is that not making an effort? Hell no! You are not blaming me on this one!”

“I have told you I want to be with you multiple times! You keep saying nah we’re good. I always tell you I love you..”

“You always tell me you got a love for me! Never that you love me!”

“Because the last time I told you that I loved you, you didn’t say anything.”

“When did you tell me you loved me?”

“The very first night I fucked you! I told you I loved you and you just looked at me like I was some sad Son of Bitch!”

“I didn’t think you were serious! I literally thought you were saying that to get me to fuck you! But at the time it didn’t matter to me because I just wanted to fuck!”

“It didn’t even matter? Wow. I told you how I felt and it didn’t even matter?”

“At the time I didn’t think you were sure.”

“Well what about now? What do you think now?”

“I think you are just getting over another break up and you’re ready for the next.”

“I literally broke up with her because she wasn’t you. She wanted to settle down and I couldn’t because all I could think about is you.”

“G! You shouldn’t have done that. She made you so happy.”

“You make me happy! You are what I want! What do I have to do to prove..that to..you,” his voice cracked at the end of his sentence. The tears began to flood his eyes and my heart began to flutter. I knew he was being honest, and I knew deep down in my heart that he cared. But was I willing to risk it all. My stability, my job, my life, all of it would be changed if I decided yes. All these thoughts were flooding my mind when I saw movement from across the table. A wooden box was placed in front of me and a huge sparkler of a ring inside.

“Caily. Baby Girl. Big Mama. You are literally the reason I get up in the morning and take my raggedy ass to the studio when I don’t feel like going. I keep grinding so I can provide for you and Zay. Yes it’s my passion, but I would give it all up tomorrow to have a stable life with the two of you. I want to go to bed with you, wake up next to you, and be in your presence for the rest of my life if you will have me. Caily Rhiannon Zavalos; will you marry me?”

I sat there across from him with tears in my eyes and warmth in my heart. I wanted what he wanted but how could I ask him to give up his entire life for me? How could I give up my entire life for him? How did any of this make sense. Before I could say a word I heard the sweetest little voice:

“Mommy?”

I looked over to see Zay’s sleepy eyes wide with happiness at the site she saw. In that moment I knew that I would have to give an answer. Say yes and give Zay the family she deserves and finally find happiness for myself; or say no to save G from losing out on his passion. But which answer was the right one?

[conceptstage]

Scars and Memories

{Team Human Day Five: Prompts Scars & Character Growth}

AO3

Perhaps the crypt at the bottom of a chantry that had been blown up by the Storm Lord Kord when his devotee had been freed from the influence of an agent of the Chained Oblivion, surrounded by the remains of the black goo beast that the agent had transformed into upon failing his master and dying at the hand of said devotee of Kord wasn’t the best place to catch a nap but Beau had slept in weirder places. Not many weirder places, but she could count two of the top of her head. She huffed as she sat down beside Caleb and leaned back against the wall, resting her arm on her knee and closing her eyes to catch five minutes of rest.

“Crazy day, huh,” Caleb mumbled.

Beau hummed tiredly. “Was it? I hadn’t noticed.”

Caleb shifted to pull off his coat and used the sleeve to wipe the sweat from his forehead. “Do you think you can make it to the Reserve before falling asleep?”

Beau peeked her eyes open a little bit to sneer at him. “I got stabbed man, let me nap.”

“We all got stabbed.”

“Well I got extra stabbed. Look at this shit.” She pulled up the end of her crop top to show of the scabbed over laceration on her sternum. “And the clerics are tapped so this shit is gonna scar.”

“You have many scars. What is so bad about this one?”

“Well, I don’t know.” She suddenly grew cagey and he knew that the next words out of her mouth were probably a lie. “I got stabbed the same place, the same way Molly did and I just got a tattoo like the one he had, if he’s watching us from wherever the fuck he ended up he’s gonna think I’m copying him.” All this talk about scars and she glanced down at Caleb’s scars, on full display now that he’d taken off his coat and he no longer wore the bandages. She snorted and reached over to grab his wrist and lift it up to get a better look. “And look at this tan line, man. I didn’t know that you even could tan.”

Caleb rolled his eyes but was slightly concerned by how unconcerned he was that she was touching his scars. “I thought you were going to sleep? Because all that you are doing right now is making fun of me.”

She chuckled and closed her eyes once more, still holding onto his wrist. “I can do both. I’m a very talented person.” She was quiet for a while and Caleb thought maybe she had finally fallen asleep. He looked out at the others, Jester wrapping up Nott’s injured leg with promises that she would heal it first thing in the morning when she got her magic back, Fjord was talking with Pumat and explaining what had happened near the entrance to the crypt, and Caduceus was examining the obelisks in the center of the room. “I lied,” Beau said suddenly and Caleb jumped slightly in surprise. “About why the scar bothers me. I’ve always… I don’t know, I’ve always approached things without worrying about whether or not I was gonna die. And I got really close today. I think the closest I ever got to really dying. I was stupid and cocky and I almost died and it pisses me off. This scar is just gonna be a reminder of that.”

Caleb was quiet for a moment and looked down at his arm, still held tightly in Beau's grip. “For a very long time my scars were a reminder of my… my shame. My stupidity, my gullibility, my naivety… my cruelty.”

When he didn’t continue right away she looked at him and rested her chin on his shoulder. “I feel like you’re trying to go somewhere with this.”

He huffed in what she’d come to recognize as his version of a laugh. “I am trying... My point is, that is what it used to be to me. Meeting these people, being part of this group, has made me realize that yes, these scars do mean all those things but they are also symbols of my ability to survive beyond all odds. That man tried to break me and I put myself back together. I am missing some pieces, I am still cracked in places, but I am in one piece for the first time in a very long time.”

She hummed and looked back down at her scab, picking at it idly until he silently chided her and pulled her hand away. “I like that actually. These scars are symbols of my ability to survive. That’s really good, are you sure you came up with that? That sounds like something Caduceus would say.”

“It is possible that I took words of his and expanded upon them.”

She snorted and relaxed at his side. “Thanks… Hey, don’t let me fall asleep, alright? I think I have a concussion.”

“Well, at least you would be quiet.”

She poked him hard in the side but she was smiling as the others started to wander over to join them.

[softshelltaakos]

what’s up everybody! it’s time for part 2 of my taz graphic novel review.

part one covered (most of) my beef with the writing and storytelling choices. this part is gonna cover character designs!!! you should know going into this that my opinions are not positive. this post is also a lot less analytical in tone than part 1, because art is not my forte.

disclaimer: i love the mcelroys. i truly do. taz has gotten me through some very difficult stuff and i have a tattoo. all this to say i’m not doing this because i hate them or because i like hating things. if you feel the need to message me about how i am overreacting, specifically to green taako, or about how i should just calm down and ignore it, or about how it’s sad that i’m getting so worked up instead of just enjoying the show, i’ve heard it and i don’t care. you will not be taken seriously. save yourself the energy.

there are spoilers for the graphic novel under the cut.

alright. i’m getting the elephant in the room out of the way first because it’s the most important thing to address, and once it’s out of my system i’ll feel better goofing on the rest of the designs. as i mentioned in the disclaimer: Green Taako Is Bad.

[ID: a panel focusing on taako. he’s skinny and minty green with chin-length light blonde hair and a big, pointy nose.]

now, a lot of people have made posts about this before, and i’m not saying anything new about it by any means. i’m also not the most equipped person to talk about why green taako is bad, because i’m a white gentile (i’ve heard conflicting opinions on whether or not green taako is antisemitic, but it feels remiss not to mention that there’s been discussion) and therefore not part of any groups affected by this whole debacle, but in short: when pressed for more diversity, specifically in taako’s case as a pretty large chunk of his arc involves literally inventing a mexican cultural food (fun note: that’s never mentioned in this book,) carey pietsch decided he should be green and the mcelroys were down with it. this is not an issue that cropped up when this design was released; it was something that there was already a ton of discourse surrounding, and it should never have gotten concepts drawn, let alone made it to publish.

this article by natt cuesta has been linked before on the subject, and i think it’s a good, concise explanation of why green taako is bad as well as why aracial characters in general are bad. this is a racist design.

now that we’ve gotten those ethical ramifications out of the way... i’m sorry, but it’s an ugly design, lmao. he looks like a palette-swapped version of pearl from steven universe with less character. the ONLY thing about this design that i like is the prominent lower lashes, if only because they’re the only thing that keeps him from looking entirely generic. because, like, y’all, when has anything about taako been generic?

[ID: a panel focusing on magnus. he’s a muscular fair-skinned man with auburn hair, a bushy beard, and a scar over his left eye.]

generic is a word that’s going to come up a lot over the course of this review, because i genuinely can’t think of a more apt descriptor for pietsch’s designs. it feels like she went with the lowest common denominator of every character’s design, a synthesis of all of the most popular (and most boring) ones, except in instances where that would lend any personality to a character’s design. magnus fits what brief description we’re given in the podcast: auburn hair. beard. big. and i guess that’s all you need?

i understand that by appealing to the most common and basic designs for these characters you’re inviting a lot less ire than you might by going with something more individual, so i get the motivation behind it -- or i would, if her designs hadn’t always been about this dull. but it’s bizarre to me that in a story as unique as the balance campaign, we ended up with the most basic ass Fantasy Hero lookin’ dude in the world as one of our protagonists.

i just really don’t have a lot to say about this. i’m just bored by it.

[ID: a panel of merle. he has medium-dark skin with a smooth white bun and beard.]

merle is simultaneously the design i like most out of the boys and the one that throws me the most, because i feel like he’s the most out on a limb one. which... oof. most merle designs i see give him a floral motif (i guess he has a few petals in his hair, maybe?) and big coke-bottle glasses, and i miss those things with this design, but at least it doesn’t totally feel like pietsch threw every merle she could get her hands on into a blender and poured it out on a page, although honestly, that might have been more satisfying. people do some really fun shit with their merle designs, but again, he’s. generic.

as the cuesta article mentions, with how much of an issue it was to get any of the boys to be poc in the first place and in conjunction with minty up there, this design also feels like tokenism -- an appeasement rather than an honest attempt at diversity or god forbid because the artist actually headcanons merle as a person of color. personally, i wish that she’d gone a step beyond re-coloring his skin and idk given him a natural hairstyle or something. he still feels very much like a recolor to me rather than a character who was designed as a person of color from the beginning.

i feel like he looks more like a cleric than he looks like a merle, which i feel like is pretty contradictory to who merle is.

[ID: a cutaway showing griffin, a white man with brown hair and glasses wearing a collared shirt.]

i’ve said before that it feels a little odd to talk about her design of a real person, so i’ll keep this brief, but... you know how every drawing of a basic white dude looks a little bit like griffin mcelroy? you know how that one arthur character looks a little bit like griffin mcelroy? you know how everyone is constantly messaging mysillycomics about how her avatar looks like griffin mcelroy?

how did carey pietsch manage to actively attempt to draw griffin mcelroy and miss the mark? it boggles the mind. he doesn’t not look like griffin, i guess, but he doesn’t look like griffin, either. i don’t know, man

[ID: a generic gerblin. he has yellowy-green skin, slight tusks or fangs, and weird, nubby little horn-type things.]

i hate these gerblins. they are ugly. next

[ID: two images of klaarg/g’nash. he’s a bugbear with brown fur and yellow eyes as well as a mouth full of pointy teeth. in the first image he looks pissed off; in the second he’s starry-eyed and delighted.]

klaarg is probably my favorite design in the book, and that’s just because he looks like a cute dog for most of the time he’s on the page. he’s fluffy and i love klaarg anyway, so like. did not take a lot to reach this mark. especially considering how i feel about most of the other designs lmfao

i do definitely think he keeps up the trend of looking generic, though.

[ID: an image of barry bluejeans. he looks like tom arnold, kind of; he’s square-jawed and white with thick-rimmed glasses. he also has a light brown mullet.]

i hate this. i hate the mullet. i’m sorry, y’all, i really, truly, cannot stand the mullet. i don’t feel like barry has mullet energy. i feel like it’s too powerful a move for him. it wouldn’t be a good move, mind you, but it would be a big one. i don’t know y’all it’s just bad

[ID: an image of killian. she’s a green-skinned orc woman with prominent eyelashes, eyebrows, and tusks, and straight brown hair.]

i can’t have been the only one who was hoping for a badass, visibly muscular, maybe even butch killian design, right? that wasn’t just me being a big old lesbian, that’s a pretty common theme of killian designs? i guess kudos for going out on a limb again, but then, like, take the kudos back for going out on the most boring limb possible again. i could hang with the face if her hair wasn’t so boring, but it’s... it’s so boring

[ID: an image of magic brian. he’s a drow with long white hair and an oblong face and oddly shaped nose.]

for how many of her designs are syntheses of popular ones, i..... don’t understand how this happened. i don’t understand how whimiscal and flamboyant magic brian who’s often drawn as taako-but-a-goth-dark-elf ended up looking like this. he looks like he used to play football and got his nose busted up and peaked in fantasy high school. he looks like the first quarter of a monster factory video where the thing’s just ugly but doesn’t have a personality or any endearing traits yet. he didn’t have to be the goth twink we all know he is but what.......... is this

[ID: an image of gundren rockseeker/bogard. he’s a light-skinned dwarf with dark long hair and a matching beard.]

..........listen i know they’re cousins and distant cousins at that but all of merle’s cousins are light-skinned and, like, not to say that that can’t happen but having them be anywhere near merle’s skin tone would’ve been such an easy way to help bolster the obviously inaccurate idea that this is a work concerned with diverse character designs, or rather to help ppl claim it was being bolstered, and yet

[ID: avi, a fair-skinned man with long dark hair kept up in a ponytail and slight scruff on his face.]

i feel like maybe avi is intended to be east asian so i think at this point that brings the count up to a whole two characters of color. we’re almost done with the book. cool. he’s cute, i guess, but guess what word i’m about to say again (it’s generic)

[ID: a panel of several unnamed cameo characters. from right to left: carey fangbattle, a light blue dragonborn; brad bradson, a green orc man with a long brown ponytail; and presumably lucas miller, a tan human with glasses and dark hair.]

ok. deep breaths.

first off, there’s another panel w these three as well as boyland, who looks fine, but i didn’t grab that one bc it’s harder to make out detail. carey is cute. brad is fine.

i assume the third guy is lucas miller because i’m not entirely sure who else he would be, and... oof! as you may know i can’t stand lucas miller, which has nothing to do with his necromancy or nerdiness and everything to do with the various human rights violations he commits in the small time he’s got focus as well as the fact that he’s got a theoretical redemption arc that’s not actually an arc so much as us being told he’s better now. lucas is an entitled jackass who repeatedly uses other people’s bodies and minds without their consent, from the obvious offense of using the bugbears as brainwashed chore-doers (read: slaves) to the less-oft discussed dragging of noelle and others out of the astral plane into robot bodies, again to do his chores for him. because of this, it has always sat very uncomfortably with me when people make lucas a poc, because everything about him screams Shitty White Nerd Boy to me. it sits extra uncomfortably coming from carey pietsch, given how white all of her other designs are.

it’s a little hard to tell because i took all these pics with my phone camera in my room’s lighting so they’re not super high fidelity or anything, but pietsch’s lucas is noticeably darker than any other character we’ve seen so far save merle. maybe he’s just a white guy with a tan, but all the same, it strikes me as incredibly skeevy to have one of so few characters of color be this fucking guy.

[ID: johann, a black man with an oblong face and textured dark hair.]

johann’s design is fine, although this is a similar face shape to that brian from earlier and i just. i don’t. understand it. it’s not especially interesting, but hey, at least he’s not another generic white guy.

that being said, as i mentioned in part 1 of this review, johann’s role is severely cut in this -- he’s reduced to three panels, when in the show itself he’s the one who escorts the boys to the voidfish’s chamber and inoculates them. as i mentioned in that post i understand that they shifted it some to give lucretia a more prominent entrance, but as i also mentioned in that post, they should have compensated for that. three panels.

johann is not a character with a great deal of screentime as it is, but he’s a character with a major impact. he is the reason story and song happens. his song serves as a direct foil to john’s nihilistic conversion of his own home plane into the hunger. the fact that he’s been reduced to three panels with little to no characterization at this point, especially in conjunction with the fact that he’s one of very few poc, makes me really, really uncomfortable. avi is in more panels in this book than johann is, and while i love avi and as i said i am parsing him as an asian dude, he’s also still light-skinned enough and the style is nondescript enough that there are definitely people who will parse him as white, and also, avi’s role in the story is not as big as johann’s.

it doesn’t sit right with me.

[ID: an image of davenport, a fair-skinned man with a big red mustache and slicked back red hair.]

ginger davenport with a big mustache. groundbreaking.

[ID: an image of lucretia, a slender black woman with short white hair dressed in blue layers.]

and finally, lucretia. now, i’m biased, and it’s hard for me to see a lucretia design i don’t like. i also think that this is, compared to a lot of the others at least, one of the more interesting designs in the book, at least as far as her clothes go. it’s not a long robe that would be hard to move in, and i appreciate that -- it strikes me as a pretty practical outfit while also being ornamental and wizard-y. and she’s pretty, and she’s not whitewashed, and that’s all great. i like her earrings.

all that being said, i feel like it’s not enough. luc’s hair continues a theme with merle’s and johann’s (as well as the preview we’ve seen of angus,) which is that it strikes me as very low-effort on pietsch’s part. it’s short and it’s definitely not straight, but it doesn’t feel to me like it had as much thought put into it as, say, minty green taako’s hair. we could’ve had a lucretia with a big beautiful afro, or long box braids, or so many other natural hairstyles; we got this. it’s not bad, but i do think it’s disappointing. without going looking for it and without being a person who reads a great deal about character design, i’ve seen a fair amount of discussion from black women (artists, writers, and none of the above) about the portrayal of black women as it pertains to their hair. they’re never designed to be as feminine as their white counterparts. their hair is never treated with the same amount of detail or respect as their white counterparts. it’s short, maybe curly if you’re lucky.

i’m gonna circle back quickly to killian’s hair. it’s long and smooth and kept down, despite the fact that killian is an action-oriented women and might not want it to be in her face all the time -- it could have at least been braided or in a bun. it could’ve been short! and that would’ve made sense. and i don’t mean to say that lucretia couldn’t have short hair, but she’s a very elegant woman whose dress is described as intricate. she wears business regalia. she could have any number of hairstyles, from something elaborate to something simple but more out-of-the-box than this, but she doesn’t. i found this on a quick hunt through my ref tag -- it’s a tutorial for drawing black folks with just a small selection of interesting things you can do with afrotextured hair. these resources aren’t hard to find! and i’m doing this for fun -- carey pietsch is a professional artist who was paid for these designs. if she’d put in more than the bare minimum effort, we could’ve had some really interesting shit going on, but she didn’t.

and that’s the core of the issue here. i truly do not feel like pietsch put the same amount of care into the designs for the few characters of color we see as she did into the white ones, and that’s upsetting and emblematic of a larger problem in the work: neither pietsch nor the mcelroys put in very much care at all for the fans of color who spoke up and asked for representation.i know i said i was getting taako out of the way first so the majority of the post could be goof-heavy, but goddamn, y’all, it’s hard to goof about when it’s so blatantly shitty. pietsch’s designs are boring at best and racist at worst, not to mention conspicuously lacking in anyone who is not skinny, muscular, or a dwarf. people have praised this thing so uncritically, including people whose opinions i generally really respect, as if the fact that the mcelroys signing off on green taako made it above reproach.

it didn’t, by the way. there’s no such thing as an unproblematic fav, because everybody fucks something up now and then, but even then, this is a pretty egregious fuck-up! and it was willful!

i’m not saying y’all need to burn your copies of the gn or stop listening to the mcelroys entirely or anything of the sort -- you may remember the disclaimer at the top of the post where i say i really, really love them, and more specifically, i really love taz: balance. but i am BEGGING YOU to think critically about their work. good, good boys can do bad, bad things. white people can produce work that’s racist even if they’re gay women. it’s not mean to critique the boys and it’s not homophobic (or god forbid reverse racist, which is still not a real thing) to critique carey.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ the real kicker of this whole thing for me is that there’s a small fanart gallery in the back of the book. most of them aren’t labeled with the artist’s handles, just their names, but there are some truly beautiful pieces featuring diverse designs -- galacticjonah and milkychai both have beautiful latino taakos featured! galacticjonah’s is fat, too! but even after the backlash against green taako, even aside from that being the design that people are going to accept as canonical, there are pieces in the gallery of green taako, as if doubling down on it was the right move.

and by the way, yeah, i’ve read griffin’s apology. but i thought we all learned in kindergarten that an apology doesn’t count if you don’t act on it.